NationStates Jolt Archive

you totally can. don't worry about anything - no one can turn down star wars.
but he isn't necasarily turning down star wars he said he might come when all my frends go tomorrow

well yes but there isn't

MWAHHAHHAAA!

That's what you think!

*Picks up shotgun*

*Runs to local station*

*Waits for train*

*Still waits*

well yes but there isn't

Damnit, TInk, are you even reading what I and everyone else are telling you, or are you shrugging it off because you don't want to persuade yourself to build up the courage to do it?

Sorry 'bout that, but I just wanted to get your attention. Now, please, go back and read what I and others have said, properly, and give it some genuine thought. You know I care about you, and whatever happens we'll be here for you. But if you don't do it, you'll be hurting yourself a lot more in the long run than if you give it a try and nothing comes of it.

I need some advice from some geeks/girlfriends of geeks. How the hell do you get them interested and get them to ask you out?
1 words: chocolate milk

but he isn't necasarily turning down star wars he said he might come when all my frends go tomorrow

tell him that you can't go then. your conversation will look like this:

"so everybody else is going to star wars tomorrow, but i don't think i can go because [your excuse goes here]. but i really want to go and i hate going to movies alone. so i was wondering if you would go with me? i'll buy you some popcorn..."

But you can! The first time of asking nearly killed me; the second was still awful, but much easier... each time you do it, it shatters walls within your head, and the next time is less difficult. Think of it as an investment for the future, if nothing else! Go on... :)

Exactly...

TInk, listen to Cambridge Major...

The first time IS really hard... you have to screw up your courage, and battle nerves, etc... and STILL try to sound cool and collected.

BUt it CAN be done.

You think it's easy for the boys? It's just as hard for us, that first time... and yet so many girls just 'wait' for us to ask. We just WISH they'd ask us!

You really have nothing to lose if he says "no".

If he IS a friend, it shouldn't come between you.

I Can't Do It!

I can't

I didn't bother reading all 16 pages of this advice column, however as a geek I can offer a lot of information about geekdom in general.

There's a lot of things to know about Geeks that may help you.

1) Most Geeks are introverts.

It's very hard to get a geek to ask you out. Why? The simple fact is most geeks are shy, or maybe you just don't appear on their radar. Not because they wouldn't be interested in you... but because they're too focused on their little world to see you, until you make yourself a part of it.

2) Geeks come in wide varieties.

Computer nerds are no longer the only flavor of geek. Geek has become the American replacement of the Japanese word Otaku. An Otaku is someone (and in Japan it was originally meant to be an insult much like geek was here) who is so deeply involved in a subject (be it comics, sports, computers, anime, or whatever) that they devote a great deal of their life to it. It's where hobby becomes obsession. Most American geeks aren't that bad however you should know your geek well enough to know his "Obsession" and whether or not you can deal with it. You don't have to be interested in it. Matter of fact unless you want to confuse the poor geek into thinking you are, and then get him/her frustrated with you because they thought you were a kindred spirit, don't try to pretend you do. If you aren't interested in his/her geekiness find other common ground with them.

3) Most Geeks prefer intelligent partners.

By and large, geeks are intelligent, and usually prefer people that can match or even beat them intellectually. It doesn't mean you have to be Einstien to net a geek. But if all you can offer is a pretty face, your geek will get bored quickly and shy away from you.

4) Usually, Geeks won't come to you.

This ties in heavily to number 1 but expands on it. If a geek likes you, he/she may go out of his way to be seen by you (or to see you), but it may take them months or years to build up the nerve to ask you out. If you wait on your geek you're likely to get bored and move on, or mistake their lack of attention for lack of interest. Pay attention to your geek, if he/she is paying attention to you, they're likely interested on some level. This leads into 5..

5) Learn your geek.

Despite every generalization I can lay down there will be a geek somewhere that varies or outright breaks all of these rules. The only thing that is absolute about geeks is that they'll have an internet connection (most would rather cut off their arm than be without their broadband connection), and that they'll have some deep interest in something that the rest of society considers it odd to be obsessed about. (Comics, Sci Fi, Anime, Computers, etc). They may have several. If it's something you think you might like, do a little research for your geek, it's a great ice breaker.

If it's an Anime, ask them if they've seen it, what they thought.
Maybe invite one to help you shop for a computer part.
Etc.

6) If you absolutely cannot approach your geek...

Find one of your geek's friends. Oh yes.. geeks have friends.. and gossip amongst geeks travels faster than wildfire. Geeks will look out for each other, and if you drop hints to one of a geek's friends that you're interested in your geek, believe me within 10 minutes your geek will know. (Well give or take for reality).
But it shouldn't take long. It might produce the desired result of getting your geek to come to you. If it doesn't it will probably tell you if your geek is interested or not as they'll likely start coming out of their holes to make themselves more visible to you.

Finally, understand that as a geek, I am citing from my personal experience.. and what I know my geek friends have done in the past. I have known some extroverted geeks. They're rarer, but they happen. Artistic or scientific geeks can be even more wrapped up in their own worlds and harder to lure out. If you're after one of these, you may have to hit them over the head with a sledgehammer before they catch on. (Not literally.)

The bottom line is, geeks are a strange breed, and you have to get to know your geek, expect to put effort into netting your geek, and expect to be the one to step forward, or have someone else do your meddling for you to try to lure your geek to you.

StormWind

1 words: chocolate milk

I know that'd work on me....

I Can't Do It!You can. Try it. If you still can't do it, come back and post here, or go get therapy (it's the same thing ;))

~Czardas, Supreme Ruler of the Universe

I Can't Do It!

You can. We all did, eventually.

Basically, it depends if you want this to happen or not.

If you aren't bothered... well, don't bother.

If you want it... I know it's hard... but it CAN be done.

I Can't Do It!

just copy what i told you to say and send it over. you don't even have to make up an excuse, just leave that part blank. then it is humorous and effective.

he isn't going to say no.

I didn't bother reading all 16 pages of this advice column, however as a geek I can offer a lot of information about geekdom in general.

There's a lot of things to know about Geeks that may help you.

1) Most Geeks are introverts.

It's very hard to get a geek to ask you out. Why? The simple fact is most geeks are shy, or maybe you just don't appear on their radar. Not because they wouldn't be interested in you... but because they're too focused on their little world to see you, until you make yourself a part of it.

2) Geeks come in wide varieties.

Computer nerds are no longer the only flavor of geek. Geek has become the American replacement of the Japanese word Otaku. An Otaku is someone (and in Japan it was originally meant to be an insult much like geek was here) who is so deeply involved in a subject (be it comics, sports, computers, anime, or whatever) that they devote a great deal of their life to it. It's where hobby becomes obsession. Most American geeks aren't that bad however you should know your geek well enough to know his "Obsession" and whether or not you can deal with it. You don't have to be interested in it. Matter of fact unless you want to confuse the poor geek into thinking you are, and then get him/her frustrated with you because they thought you were a kindred spirit, don't try to pretend you do. If you aren't interested in his/her geekiness find other common ground with them.

3) Most Geeks prefer intelligent partners.

By and large, geeks are intelligent, and usually prefer people that can match or even beat them intellectually. It doesn't mean you have to be Einstien to net a geek. But if all you can offer is a pretty face, your geek will get bored quickly and shy away from you.

4) Usually, Geeks won't come to you.

This ties in heavily to number 1 but expands on it. If a geek likes you, he/she may go out of his way to be seen by you (or to see you), but it may take them months or years to build up the nerve to ask you out. If you wait on your geek you're likely to get bored and move on, or mistake their lack of attention for lack of interest. Pay attention to your geek, if he/she is paying attention to you, they're likely interested on some level. This leads into 5..

5) Learn your geek.

Despite every generalization I can lay down there will be a geek somewhere that varies or outright breaks all of these rules. The only thing that is absolute about geeks is that they'll have an internet connection (most would rather cut off their arm than be without their broadband connection), and that they'll have some deep interest in something that the rest of society considers it odd to be obsessed about. (Comics, Sci Fi, Anime, Computers, etc). They may have several. If it's something you think you might like, do a little research for your geek, it's a great ice breaker.

If it's an Anime, ask them if they've seen it, what they thought.
Maybe invite one to help you shop for a computer part.
Etc.

6) If you absolutely cannot approach your geek...

Find one of your geek's friends. Oh yes.. geeks have friends.. and gossip amongst geeks travels faster than wildfire. Geeks will look out for each other, and if you drop hints to one of a geek's friends that you're interested in your geek, believe me within 10 minutes your geek will know. (Well give or take for reality).
But it shouldn't take long. It might produce the desired result of getting your geek to come to you. If it doesn't it will probably tell you if your geek is interested or not as they'll likely start coming out of their holes to make themselves more visible to you.

Finally, understand that as a geek, I am citing from my personal experience.. and what I know my geek friends have done in the past. I have known some extroverted geeks. They're rarer, but they happen. Artistic or scientific geeks can be even more wrapped up in their own worlds and harder to lure out. If you're after one of these, you may have to hit them over the head with a sledgehammer before they catch on. (Not literally.)

The bottom line is, geeks are a strange breed, and you have to get to know your geek, expect to put effort into netting your geek, and expect to be the one to step forward, or have someone else do your meddling for you to try to lure your geek to you.

StormWind

Nice work. :)

I didn't bother reading all 16 pages of this advice column, however as a geek I can offer a lot of information about geekdom in general.

ETC. <SNIP!

I guess that makes me a geek then... actually... Where's my train?

----

What do you mean the last train to the lake District has been cancelled!

-----

I'll give you deeply sorry!!!!

---

You can't get rid of the Mole man that easily! You'll pay for this South Eastern trains!!!!!!

Purely innocent question.....

What is his MSN id?

just copy what i told you to say and send it over. you don't even have to make up an excuse, just leave that part blank. then it is humorous and effective.
Well, that would send a not-so-subtle message of your feelings. So do it. How much longer is he going to be online anyway? I thought so. Not too much longer. You don't have much time. Act!

~Czardas, Supreme Ruler of the Universe

I Can't Do It!

Can you please tell me, before I go on, that you've read and thought about my previous posts in this thread, so I at least get the impression that I'm not typing into thin air? Thank you. ;)

Now... I know it's hard. Damn it, I'm a guy; I should know. I sympathise, I really do. And what we're asking you to do isn't even as hard as what a guy has to do; we just want you to make it easier for him to ask you. Stop telling yourself that you can't do it: you have to tell yourself that you *must* do it. That if you don't do it, you'll be regretting it and kicking yourself for a long, long time. And that if you do it and nothing comes from it, you won't have lost anything. You won't even have embarassed yourself.

Last time I asked a girl out, it came to nothing, but in retrospect I'm damn well glad I gave it a try. Because I know, with absolute certainty, that if I hadn't tried I'd still be furious at myself for doing nothing.

What you need to do is work up your courage and just tell yourself you're going to do it. Just accept that as a given. You're going to do it. Once you've accepted that, you'll find yourself focusing on the how and when, etc, and you will no longer be questioning whether or not you should. Just tell yourself you will do it. You'll be surprised how much it helps you fight down your shyness and nervousness.

Purely innocent question.....

What is his MSN id?
i'm not as stupid as i look

i'm not as stupid as i look

You look stupid... Wouldn't have guessed :D

i'm not as stupid as i look

We all know you're not. :)

*hits Moleland on head* She's not stupid! She doesn't look stupid!

i'm not as stupid as i lookI have an idea!

Convince him to create a nation on NS. Then we'll send him a telegram telling him...

~Czardas, Supreme Ruler of the Universe

We all know you're not. :)

Is that supposed to be a compliment? ;) No, no, no, it should be like this:

Well, if you're even more intelligent than you look, then you must be a genius.

See? :p

(More seriously, you know you don't look stupid.

Now give us his MSN. :p)

i'm not as stupid as i look

I never suggested anything about stupidity.

You can't ask the guy out, but you want to.

Me, (and many others here), I'd have no qualms about texting a complete stranger, and asking them to ask you out.

Not stupidity... more like... fear?

We all know you're not. :)

*hits Moleland on head* She's not stupid! She doesn't look stupid!True, she's not stupid unless she believes things are impossible. (hint, hint)


~Czardas, Supreme Ruler of the Universe

i'm not as stupid as i look
While I'm sure none of us think you look stupid, prove that you aren't as stupid by doing the right thing and follow the advice the good people above have been giving you. Please?

ok, his msn is billthesexgod@hotmail.com

I never suggested anything about stupidity.

You can't ask the guy out, but you want to.

Me, (and many others here), I'd have no qualms about texting a complete stranger, and asking them to ask you out.

Not stupidity... more like... fear?

Point of fact - most people have had a moment where they were afraid to ask someone out - usually in their youth.

And most will wistfully recall, usually in moments of despair later in their life, that wasted moment where their life might have taken a different direction.

You have nothing to lose by asking him out, or letting him know through a friend that you would love for him to ask you out.

OK... Guidelines? I'm perfectly willing to send him an MSN message for you (in fact it would probably be good if several of us did :D), but is there anything you absolutely do not want us to say?

Who wants to MSN the lucky young chap?

I will if nobody else wants to... but I have to create an MSN id first!

Who wants to MSN the lucky young chap?

I will if nobody else wants to... but I have to create an MSN id first!

I've got an MSN id. I'm just waiting to know what TInk would be ok with me telling him. Only that he should go to the cinema with you, or can I go further? ;)

Stupid MSN... I shoudl really install it at home...

hahahaha! did you really believe that's his addy?! seriously, there isn't a cat in hell's chance i'm gonna give it you!

Point of fact - most people have had a moment where they were afraid to ask someone out - usually in their youth.

And most will wistfully recall, usually in moments of despair later in their life, that wasted moment where their life might have taken a different direction.

You have nothing to lose by asking him out, or letting him know through a friend that you would love for him to ask you out.

I remember how worked-up I got before I first 'asked a girl out' (she actually turned me down, too).

The next time was easier... and we ended up 'going out' for three years.

I've got an MSN id. I'm just waiting to know what TInk would be ok with me telling him. Only that he should go to the cinema with you, or can I go further? ;)
Perhaps you should just copy and paste bits of this thread... ;)

...no, not really, even I am not that much of a bastard. Although it really isn't such a bad idea - if I was told that someone I knew was saying such things about me, I would be touched beyond measure, even if I didn't share their feelings.

hahahaha! did you really believe that's his addy?! seriously, there isn't a cat in hell's chance i'm gonna give it you!So then, why don't you do something? We're all waiting for you.

Everyone starts chanting here...

~Czardas, Supreme Ruler of the Universe

hahahaha! did you really believe that's his addy?! seriously, there isn't a cat in hell's chance i'm gonna give it you!
Well, it has to be said, sexgod is not something that a geek is likely to have in their username, IMHO.

hahahaha! did you really believe that's his addy?! seriously, there isn't a cat in hell's chance i'm gonna give it you!

Bah! Damn you! :p

Check your TGs.

hahahaha! did you really believe that's his addy?! seriously, there isn't a cat in hell's chance i'm gonna give it you!

Don't see any reason why not... it can't hurt.

I feel so untrusted...

Don't see any reason why not... it can't hurt.
it can

it can

Fair enough...

*Catches fire for no apparent reason*

it can
How?

it can

Of course, if you gave us his MSN, we could give him this forums URL and he could see how we have all been discussing him. I dont think thats what Tink wants.

Please, please, please do something about this and ask him to the film, just you two, without the friends he doesn't quite get along with, just a nice pleasant day at the cinema. Go on...

it can

If someone on here sends him a message and it all goes wrong, you can always say that you didn't know anything about it.

Of course, if you gave us his MSN, we could give him this forums URL and he could see how we have all been discussing him. I dont think thats what Tink wants.
exactly!

You are prevaricating, young Tink!

If someone on here sends him a message and it all goes wrong, you can always say that you didn't know anything about it.
But he might suspect. It's best she does this personally, whether in person, by MSN, or whatever.

I feel so untrusted...

You look stupid... Wouldn't have guessed :D

Err, and you wonder why that is? :p

Just having a bit of fun. Honest. Couldn't resist.

It's probably for the best actually.

I mean, geeks usually treat their women like goddesses, and are so sensitive to their partner's feelings that they make fantastic lovers, etc...

She'd hate it.... what sane girl wants a guy like that?

Well i personally have nothing else sane to add to this conversation, so i'll go and do something else.

Tink, I think I speek for everyone here when I say these three words

Ask him out

it can

i'm with you on this one. this isn't a matter to be handled by a bunch of over-eager internet acquaintances.

i still say you should just go for it. this is the perfect opportunity, with easy outs for both of you without embarassment or doing any damage to friendships should you want to go that way.

Of course, if you gave us his MSN, we could give him this forums URL and he could see how we have all been discussing him. I dont think thats what Tink wants.

Then again... if she just TG'd his addy to an NSer she trusts....

Anyhow I'll be off. 4:45AM. And I was doing so well at getting into bed earlier... (2am, that is :p).

Oh well. It was for good reason. Best of luck Tink! :)

Err, and you wonder why that is? :p

Just having a bit of fun. Honest. Couldn't resist.

LOL...

Have you been reading my posts? HOW DARE YOU!!!!!!

Tink, I think I speek for everyone here when I say these three words

Ask him out

And make a note - this is the ONLY time Neo and I have EVER agreed on anything. :)

It MUST be true.

OK, I have an idea: we make a massive effort to find out who he is, using people.yahoo.com for example to search for him, find out his MSN address and everything, and contact him that way. You can't hide on the net. We'll just have to know both his real name and Tink's. That's the only problem. However, that oughtn't be too hard... ;) Tink, if you don't want help from us, and you don't want to do it yourself, it's obvious that you just don't want to make an effort to get what you want. In other words, you want something, but you don't want to work to get it.

"Now, how can I make a quick £300? Besides working, I mean."

~Czardas, Supreme Ruler of the Universe

OK, I have an idea: we make a massive effort to find out who he is, using people.yahoo.com for example to search for him, find out his MSN address and everything, and contact him that way. You can't hide on the net. We'll just have to know both his real name and Tink's. That's the only problem. However, that oughtn't be too hard... ;) Tink, if you don't want help from us, and you don't want to do it yourself, it's obvious that you just don't want to make an effort to get what you want. In other words, you want something, but you don't want to work to get it.

"Now, how can I make a quick £300? Besides working, I mean."

~Czardas, Supreme Ruler of the Universe

Quiet you!

You could always do the tomb raider act

arg! Arridia has his msn addy n i really think i'm gonna regret it, i hate you guys

arg! Arridia has his msn addy n i really think i'm gonna regret it, i hate you guys

Charming! and I have hardly done anything!

*Sulks*

arg! Arridia has his msn addy n i really think i'm gonna regret it, i hate you guys

Then why did you ask our help?

Then you ask him out before Arridia has a chance.

It's the only way.

Then you ask him out before Arridia has a chance.

It's the only way.

Yeah! Get him first! Like, blatently ask him out.

Well, there's help and then there's intrusion. I think she fears we crossed over from the former to the latter.

Yeah! Get him first! Like, blatently ask him out.

Yeah! What he said!

*chants*
Ask him out!
Ask him out!
Ask him out!
Ask him out!
*receives glares from the NS community*

Er...sorry...heheh. *hides*

~Czardas, Supreme Ruler of the Universe

*chants*
Ask him out!
Ask him out!
Ask him out!
Ask him out!
*receives glares from the NS community*

Er...sorry...heheh. *hides*

~Czardas, Supreme Ruler of the Universe

Quiet you!! x2

Well, there's help and then there's intrusion. I think she fears we crossed over from the former to the latter.

Well lets just hope whoever it is who got the MSN is tactful. Does anyone know this person?

arg! Arridia has his msn addy n i really think i'm gonna regret it, i hate you guys

I don't think so.

You know we only pestered you because we care. :)

And, to be honest... although if he DID turn you down you'd be upset:

1) He's a geek, and a guy... what are the chances he'll say no?

2) You might be upset, but I don't think you'd end up regretting it.

I don't think so.

You know we only pesered you because we care. :)

And, to be honest... although if he DID turn you down you'd be upset:

1) He's a geek, and a guy... what are the chances he'll say no?

2) You might be upset, but I don't think you'd end up regretting it.

Elaboration on number 1.

He's a geek, and your a chixx0r.

Elaboration on number 1.

He's a geek, and your a chixx0r.

Rumour has it... a hot chixxor, no?

1) He's a geek, and a guy... what are the chances he'll say no?

he's a geek, and a guy, being asked by a girl, to go see star wars. probability of success = 97%

Quiet you!! x2*deep and mysterious voice* Trying to silence the Supreme Ruler of the Universe will get you into trouble. Severe trouble...

*Moleland disappears from house at night and all mention of him/her is removed*

Ok, I'll abandon this thread. Let me know on progress.

~Czardas, Supreme Ruler of the Universe

Rumour has it... a hot chixxor, no?Player pics thread will tell you more. (No, I haven't seen it.)

~Czardas, Supreme Ruler of the Universe

Well lets just hope whoever it is who got the MSN is tactful. Does anyone know this person?
Ariddia seems the responsible type, thankfully, but in such delicate matters it's hard to know precisely where is safe to trod, or prod.

*deep and mysterious voice* Trying to silence the Supreme Ruler of the Universe will get you into trouble. Severe trouble...

*Moleland disappears from house at night and all mention of him/her is removed*

Ok, I'll abandon this thread. Let me know on progress.

~Czardas, Supreme Ruler of the Universe

you can't silence me!

Quiet you!!! x3

I'm more supreme than you!

he's a geek, and a guy, being asked by a girl, to go see star wars. probability of success = 97%
You are so correct, especially as he's a fan of the series, and according to the player pics, the rumours are true regarding our dear Tink.

Hell, I don't see how he can say no.
Geeks are usually hopeless when it comes to getting chixs.

I can imagine how you feel. As a "geek" myself I bet I'd feel the same way if there was a girl I really wanted to ask out. But unfortuantely there aren't any girls I know well enough to ask out. So, hey, I'm jealous of you having the opportunity to ask out someone you really like.

I remember a few months ago I was at a Model United Nations conference and a girl sent a note across to me saying that she fancied me. I thought she was probably only joking and ignored it, but perhaps she wasn't. I don't know. Maybe I should I found out.

Hopefully one day I will be in your position, and I hope I have the nerve to ask a girl out. Who knows? Perhaps if you get over your nervousness and it works out for you, it will help improve my confidence a little.

I've got to go now, but I wish you all the best and I really hope it works out.

Damn, pouring my heart out on an internet forum. I hoped you'd ask him before I had to do this. Oh well, if it works, it was worth it.

I can imagine how you feel. As a "geek" myself I bet I'd feel the same way if there was a girl I really wanted to ask out. But unfortuantely there aren't any girls I know well enough to ask out. So, hey, I'm jealous of you having the opportunity to ask out someone you really like.

I remember a few months ago I was at a Model United Nations conference and a girl sent a note across to me saying that she fancied me. I thought she was probably only joking and ignored it, but perhaps she wasn't. I don't know. Maybe I should I found out.

Hopefully one day I will be in your position, and I hope I have the nerve to ask a girl out. Who knows? Perhaps if you get over your nervousness and it works out for you, it will help improve my confidence a little.

I've got to go now, but I wish you all the best and I really hope it works out.

Damn, pouring my heart out on an internet forum. I hoped you'd ask him before I had to do this. Oh well, if it works, it was worth it.

This situation sounds familar....

This kinda happened to me once....

arg! Arridia has his msn addy n i really think i'm gonna regret it, i hate you guys

I've sent him a message. Now hopefully you'll be hearing from him. I'll be wishing you the best.

*hugs TInk* :)

I've sent him a message. Now hopefully you'll be hearing from him. I'll be wishing you the best.

*hugs TInk* :)

It better have been good *Shakes fist*

This guy really must be the worlds luckiest geek. For a start, most of us geeks would be over the moon at receiving any female attention. on top of that, you seem like a really nice girl tink, if he's stupid enough to turn you down he doesn't deserve you anyway, and your bound to find someone more appreciative. i really don't think you need to worry at all, as if the pictures you have posted are actually you then you're drop dead gorgeous! there's no way he'd say no unless he's crazy.

I've sent him a message. Now hopefully you'll be hearing from him.

What sort of message?

Then why did you ask our help?
cause i was gonna ask him out, i just chickened out of it



What sort of message?
that's what i wanna know! and now Arridia's gone offline and i'm too scared to start a convo with Bill

as a long time dater of geeks, you as the girl ALWAYS have to ask them out. even the more outgoing geeks are too pussy to ask. and if you want their attention you just have to take off your clothes. if they're playing a videogame, just get naked. it has never failed for me.

cause i was gonna ask him out, i just chickened out of it
and this is where alcohol is handy.

I need some advice from some geeks/girlfriends of geeks. How the hell do you get them interested and get them to ask you out?

Be friendly? Say hello? Ask them out first?

Be friendly? Say hello? Ask them out first?
nooooooooooooooooooo

I remember a few months ago I was at a Model United Nations conference and a girl sent a note across to me saying that she fancied me. I thought she was probably only joking and ignored it, but perhaps she wasn't. I don't know. Maybe I should I found out.

this i have never understood. not catching subtle hints and clues and signals, i understand. hell, i even understand missing or writing off obvious ones. but come on dude, you had it in writing.

nooooooooooooooooooo

Look, I'm a pretty shy guy myself, but in the end if you want something to happen you have to make it happen, or be satisfied that chance wasn't with you when it doesn't.

this i have never understood. not catching subtle hints and clues and signals, i understand. hell, i even understand missing or writing off obvious ones. but come on dude, you had it in writing.
And if your self-esteem is low, there is no reason why this cannot be dismissed as a cruel joke, too. Trust me, I did it. Admittedly,looking back at it I am still certain they were nothing more than rather nasty teasing, but at the time I would have thought that no matter how sincere they actually were.

nooooooooooooooooooo
come on. i'm one of the shyest people i know and even i have the balls to ask boys out. i've done it three times! two of the times i got a boyfriend. what works for me is thinking in my head "i can do it i can do it" and breathing exercises for relaxation. if that doesn't work just blurt out when the boy is there "i have something important to ask you" so then you're stuck with having to tell him something. and as i recommended earlier have a couple beers.

this i have never understood. not catching subtle hints and clues and signals, i understand. hell, i even understand missing or writing off obvious ones. but come on dude, you had it in writing.
As someone before wrote, sometimes we geeks need a hammer or a cricket bat to truly get our attention. I certainly did, not that it ever got me anywhere...

that's what i wanna know! and now Arridia's gone offline and i'm too scared to start a convo with Bill

ah, sweet torturous drama.

i recommend just saying "hey" to him, and seeing what he has to say. nothing to be concerned about. the ball is technically in his court now.

nooooooooooooooooooo
Yesssssssssssssss!

ah, sweet torturous drama.
My doctor had told me I wasn't getting enough fingernails in my diet...

that's what i wanna know! and now Arridia's gone offline and i'm too scared to start a convo with Bill

Being scared will get you nowhere, remeber the swiming pool metaphor. Life is like a swiming pool. You wont enjoy it unless you dive in.

And if your self-esteem is low, there is no reason why this cannot be dismissed as a cruel joke, too. Trust me, I did it. Admittedly,looking back at it I am still certain they were nothing more than rather nasty teasing, but at the time I would have thought that no matter how sincere they actually were.

but you see, their teasing can only backfire on them - you have documentary evidence in their own hand writing of their undying love and affection. when it turns out they were just teasing you, you can turn that back on them.

of course, this might not work for true geeks. i was/am a geek but i had special privileges in high school compared to other geeks. basically, my geekdom was lessened by my pot smoking and partying and occassional dating of pom squad girls. ah, drugs and alcohol, is there anything they can't do?

I need some advice from some geeks/girlfriends of geeks. How the hell do you get them interested and get them to ask you out?

Depends on the Geek/type of geek. In general, "Geeks" or "Nerds" are a bit shy-the guy's probably interested, but he's too self-deprecating to admit it, much less take action.

This means you need to initiate contact, and remember that Geeks often don't notice the traditional 'flirting' manuevers, since they usually don't do much of that sort of thing in the formative years. (Poorly Socialized, doncha know...)

If you want to spark him into action, show interest in the things he's interested in (that you're also interested in), hang out with him a lot, and "ease" your Geek into realizing that you think he's actually an interesting person. It's kind of like taming a wild animal, to capture a "Geek".

(Note: not all Geeks/Nerds are Trekkers/Trekkies. Using Star Treck could backfire horribly since it's a stereotype. quoting bits from 'Red Dwarf', 'Neverwhere', or 'Babylon Five' might be better approaches. Going to Sci-Fi cons is kind of the 'easy way out'- it's a comfortable setting and many,many, intellectuals of a repressed nature will let loose those repressions at a Con. This has, at times, frightened and alarmed Mundanes since the pranks usually involve somewhat more... challenging techniques than most Frat-Brother types could even concieve of.)

Tailor your approach to the target-I mean, 'candidate'. Once he's aware of your interest, the easiest way to keep his, is to keep showing up.

That's right, just like all men, your chosen prey is vulnerable to that feminine wile known as "showing up for the date and not cancelling to wash your socks."

well if he has indeed received a message then you may as well talk to him on msn now, as it'd be way more awkward to do it in person. this guy is your friend, so i'm afraid you'll have to see him again at some point.

Give me a description on what this geek's into and I'll help you out so much, being a geek myself. (and an unsuccessful-with-girls one to boot!)

Be into RPGs, though. As far as I know, geeks of any sorts LOVE a girl who can argue RPGs. Especially if they know more obscure RPGs.

(also: get the devil on MSN.)

well if he has indeed received a message then you may as well talk to him on msn now, as it'd be way more awkward to do it in person. this guy is your friend, so i'm afraid you'll have to see him again at some point.
i started talking to him like a normal convo and nothing has been said about a message

Give me a description on what this geek's into and I'll help you out so much, being a geek myself. (and an unsuccessful-with-girls one to boot!)

Be into RPGs, though. As far as I know, geeks of any sorts LOVE a girl who can argue RPGs. Especially if they know more obscure RPGs.

(also: get the devil on MSN.)
I'm not gonna pretend to be into stuff that i'm not, he seems to like me for me anyway otherwise we wouldn't be friends

i started talking to him like a normal convo and nothing has been said about a message

Ask him about it... he might think it's some unknown person messing with him.

Asking him means he can then broach the subject with you.

Ask him about it... he might think it's some unknown person messing with him.

Asking him means he can then broach the subject with you.
but that will ruin my whole 'oh, i accidently sent Arridia my contact list and he was just messing with you' backup plan if he doesn't like me

(Note: not all Geeks/Nerds are Trekkers/Trekkies. Using Star Treck could backfire horribly since it's a stereotype. quoting bits from 'Red Dwarf', 'Neverwhere', or 'Babylon Five' might be better approaches. Going to Sci-Fi cons is kind of the 'easy way out'- it's a comfortable setting and many,many, intellectuals of a repressed nature will let loose those repressions at a Con. This has, at times, frightened and alarmed Mundanes since the pranks usually involve somewhat more... challenging techniques than most Frat-Brother types could even concieve of.)

Ooh, ooh, don't forget Python! Monty Python is usually a sure hit...

i started talking to him like a normal convo and nothing has been said about a message

the problem of going through third parties.

perhaps he hasn't checked his email yet. or he might have just tossed it as spam because it was from somebody he never heard of. and the only way to find out is to ask directly. which is probably even scarier than just asking the original question.

which is why you should have gone with my plan. you still can. ain't nothing unusual with one friend asking another friend to go see star wars together when you "can't" go with the entire group of your friends.

I'm not gonna pretend to be into stuff that i'm not, he seems to like me for me anyway otherwise we wouldn't be friends
Very wise. Pretending to like things you don't always backfires in the end.

I'm not gonna pretend to be into stuff that i'm not, he seems to like me for me anyway otherwise we wouldn't be friends

Being possibly, one of the biggest geeks around, I have quite the knowledge on the sub-proverbial geek mind. I don't know his personality that well, so I can't do anything about it, and I'd ask for his MSN to brainwash him, but....nah just kidding.

Here's what I would suggest:

1) Ask him out. Seems simple, because it is. If you're too socially detached then ask him out in private. If he's the kind of person (Oh my god! I'm calling him a person!) that is socially inactive, he probably would say yes.

2) Find something you have in common and go from there. Geeks are really absolute in things. They assume that if you don't know much about anything, you might as well not know about it at all. And there is vice versa; if you know about it, then they'll assume you know tons of it. Don't talk something that you know little of.

3) Ask a friend to ask him out for you. The answer will be 'No', if he's a geek, because they think you're messing with their heads. Then, ask him why he denied you, and be sincere, and that'll (mostly) get him to say Yes.

i started talking to him like a normal convo and nothing has been said about a message
Well, then, let us think. Several options...

1.) He doesn't have enough self-esteem to take the message seriously, since he can't be sure that it is really what you think. In which case, he is desperate for you to say something, now that his hopes have been raised - so do so!

OR

2.) He is still scared, doesn't quite dare believe it, doesn't know quite what to say even if he does - quite possible - and is waiting for you to make another move. Again, do so!

NOT

3.) He doesn't want you - it takes very little courage to say that, and he would have done.

The worst thing you can do is leave him in confusion - it will only make things awkward. And do you know what Aridia said? I mean, I might be completely wrong, but it could have been just "she's got something important to tell you" and he could now be waiting with baited breath...and wondering why you aren't saying it...

And you don't need a back-up plan! All that that will do is stop you being completely honest, and if you are both scared and skirting the issue, you could quite easily neither go far enough, and miss out on something beautiful! Anyway, you hold all the cards! You have the upper hand! He is a geek, and you are a girl. You are in the position of power, so for crying out loud, use it!!

but that will ruin my whole 'oh, i accidently sent Arridia my contact list and he was just messing with you' backup plan if he doesn't like me

I thought girls were supposed to be devious?

You KNOW you 'accidentally' sent it to him...

If he asks you out, all is good... you thought he might, you'd told him he (new boyf) was cute...

If he DOESN'T ask you out... you were worried that your 'friend' might mess with him , like he threatened too... he's messed with some of your other MSN pals....

Just ask him out to the movies by typing it and then going out of the room for a few seconds. Come back, and without looking, click enter. Works everytime :)

I'm not gonna pretend to be into stuff that i'm not, he seems to like me for me anyway otherwise we wouldn't be friends
I'd say you don't have to pretend to be into things you aren't. It helps to learn even a little bit about whatever they're into though. The last two boys I've dated are computer techs and love it. I learned a little bit about computer hardware on my own and each of them found it to be a big turn on.

Coming from a long-time and *proud* geek, I would suggest that you be a geek to get a geek. (I feel so cool being able to give advice on this topic I know so well.) Here is a list of characteristics of true geeks:

1) Be proud. Geeks don't care (mostly) what others think of their geekyness. For example, today I wore a bunch of stickers that said "Star Wars: May the force be with you" and the same thing in Italian. Sure I got odd looks but I am a geek so I don't care!
2) Act smart. You don't have to be smart, just act like you are. Pay attention in school, do all your homework and more and sit in the front row.
3) Know the lingo. Especially lingo pertaining to computer and electronics. Geeks are liable to be into that stuff. Also know the lingo of other common topics like Star Wars, Star Trek, movies considered geeky, books considered geeky, etc.

The best I can say about getting a geek, is that you have to go about it differently. Flirting with a geek is very different from flirting with another girl. Trust me, geeky girls are not girly. You have to debate...a lot!

(Now I can tell you all about getting geeky girls but can someone tell me how to get a geeky guy? Please! LOL.

Good luck!
Ellen :cool:

I'm not gonna pretend to be into stuff that i'm not, he seems to like me for me anyway otherwise we wouldn't be friends

That's a good start. You're friends already, so he's already comfortable with your presence and likes you as a person.

Do NOT fear rejection. Two sides letting fear of rejection prevent them from moving is two sides in a stalemate that will only break when one side finds someone else to catch their attention-who is NOT so afraid of rejection that they can't make the move.

Further, use your 'backup' of the list thing to open your route. i.e. tell him about the 'mixup' ahead of time, and use that to broach the subject of the messages.

You're already better than 50% there if you're already pals. you just need to be a bit more aggressive (not too much, don't smother the boy.)

Touching is a good idea too. Hugging, what have you, before you make your real interests readily apparent-nothing tells an oblivious guy she's interested, like her arm over his shoulders in a Denny's booth, or Movie. if you act like you're already 'his', (slowly, take it slowly) and make it clear you aren't interested in someone else-he'll eventually get used to the idea, and it will kind of fall into "Just the natural order".

You're female, he's male, be manipulative. Stake your claim with subtlety and express your interest in small-things, gradually testing and building up, and unfold your interest to him at a speed he's comfortable with.

my best friend (who is female) made it abundantly clear to her great love that she liked him, by for example using him as a pillow on a party. He initially turned her down, but about a month later they got together.
That tactic works so often... ^_^

No, you have to be REALLY obvious. Most flirting is viewed with suspision as it's usually meant as an insult (yes, I know this is a generality).
Or a ‘ha, you fell for it, you twit’. V_V

I don't think there's a great difference, other than hobbies and interests, between a geek and any other boy. At that age I couldn't take a hint from a girl and usually assumed that any compliment that could possibly be taken the wrong way was a piss take.
I’m like that with any compliment from anyone. (is a girl)

Originally Posted by Jocabia
Again, blunt or clear? You can be clear without making the person feel like they are cornered. Blunt = cornered. Clear = no way to misinterpret the message.
Originally Posted by Jocabia
Again, blunt or clear? You can be clear without making the person feel like they are cornered. Blunt = cornered. Clear = no way to misinterpret the message.

To be quite honest, I don't think i'd knock a girl back if she went and bluntly asked me out. I know that takes guts.
I dunno. If a boy was too blunt with me and I felt cornered, I’d smack him in the face and run for it -_-;;

Wow, that was a really long thread...

As somewhat of a geek myself, I can testify that some (well, more like alot) of the stuff that has been said here is dead-on when it comes to how geeks think. Keep in mind that subtle hints are not going to register. Obvious hints are probably not going to register either. Geeks tend to be very oblivious, and not just a little self-conscious and shy, so whatever hints you do give will probably be rationalized as something else. I guess all I can suggest is that you make yourself clear without being too bold about it.

I need some advice from some geeks/girlfriends of geeks. How the hell do you get them interested and get them to ask you out?
Ask ME out! :D :fluffle: :p :fluffle: :D

Chewbacca mask.

What the hell? Why do you wanna date someone who bites the heads off of fucking chickens?!




Just go up to him, punch him in the face and hump him so he knows your dominate.

you sick fruitcup.

Someone needs to invent a word for History geeks. They're becoming more and more common. Any thoughts?

Nerds?

I need some advice from some geeks/girlfriends of geeks. How the hell do you get them interested and get them to ask you out? they like that y

I need some advice from some geeks/girlfriends of geeks. How the hell do you get them interested and get them to ask you out?
easiest way to get a geek is for you to ask them. We geeks be timid creatures.

You could watch that stupid show I saw advertised coming up, Beauty &the Geek. Perhaps Ashtun Kutcher knows all.

You want to know how to get a geek?
Simple. Ask me out.
Come on, please?
I don't want to die alone!

Does that mean that God vomited at my very nice comment?
Yeah. *wipes mouth*

Oi! :mad:
:p
To be fair, Australians are hilarious when they talk. I love the way they always call you "mite".

honestly, i just can't do it, i don't think he likes me in that way, it's prob best we just stay friends :(
If there is a :( it is not best that you just "stay friends".

Good luck, don't stop trying. From what you've told us it sounds like Bill does like you.

ok, his msn is billthesexgod@hotmail.com
what an email address! he could be your billthesexgod!

well, speaking as a geek myself ( but yes, the one relatively hot geek that is there most of the time) I'd say it all depends on what kind of geek. There are geeks that will get intimidated by the simple prescence of an attractive woman, while there are others that simply dont have the time/cant take the truoble of/ are too shy to ask you out.
Take the initiative. Take him to star wars III. Push him against the wall, take his pants off and go down on him. That last one works well on every guy, but especially well on geeks.
We love oral sex

he [Tink's Bill] could be your billthesexgod!
Well, here's hoping, eh?

easiest way to get a geek is for you to ask them. We geeks be timid creatures.
true dat. or, sometimes, too absorbed in whatvere the hell were geeks about to notice obvious flirting.
Its happened to me a million times before.
I lost my chance with the hottest girl Ive ever known because I never noticed :headbang:
you might think I wouldve learned my lesson...hehe...no

well, speaking as a geek myself ( but yes, the one relatively hot geek that is there most of the time)
I hope you know I hate you. I'm like an ogre, only fatter and less atractive. My face does d6 damage upon seeing it, I'm so fugly.

I hope you know I hate you. I'm like an ogre, only fatter and less atractive. My face does d6 damage upon seeing it, I'm so fugly.

that is why, by regulation, we have to be assholes, at least in unimportant situations.
You can offset the assholinessw ith a little annoyance, but the sum of the 2 must equal your hotness if you're a geek.
something like:
when h=hotness, a=annoyance and s=assholiness

h=(a/2)+s

truth is, he's a guy. And, regardless on the character of a man, if youre hot and not a total bitch, he'll go out with you.
especially if you are also a geek. This might seem complicated, but remember geeks have very low standards

Just to warn you... if he's a Star Wars Geek (such as myself), Taking about CAptain Picard and Kirk will only make him be less sure about you :P

my geeks don't mind being called geeks
Well just cause they don't show it, doesn't mean it doesn't hurt them.\

If someone called me a geek, especially a girl I liked, I'd agree, but secretly begin to hate her.

Well just cause they don't show it, doesn't mean it doesn't hurt them.\

If someone called me a geek, especially a girl I liked, I'd agree, but secretly begin to hate her.
then screw you hippie, she's mine now

Just be gentle and be clear and you'll get your geek. If none of this works, then you're right he's gay. That's the only explanation.
Well, no offense to Tink, but we've never seen her. For all we know, she may be .... unattractive.

i'm not as stupid as i look
You look stupid? Forget about him; it won't work.

but you see, their teasing can only backfire on them - you have documentary evidence in their own hand writing of their undying love and affection. when it turns out they were just teasing you, you can turn that back on them.

of course, this might not work for true geeks. i was/am a geek but i had special privileges in high school compared to other geeks. basically, my geekdom was lessened by my pot smoking and partying and occassional dating of pom squad girls. ah, drugs and alcohol, is there anything they can't do?
Well, they can't cure cancer.


Now I have a serious note. A while ago, you, Tink, made a thread about how hard it is to break up with a "nice guy". You must remember, that a geek is almost always a "nice guy", so you may be falling for the same pit. Just something to think about.

Well, no offense to Tink, but we've never seen her. For all we know, she may be .... unattractive.

I seem to recall she looks kind of like Eliza Dushku... (Faith, in the Buffy series)...

I have your solution, TInk... fellow geeks, tell me if I'm wrong:

Walk up to him.

Take out a handful of regular six sided die, and drop them on the table a few times... studying them intently, until he notices.

When he finally asks you what you are doing, you respond:

"Trying to fail a willpower check so I can kiss you".....

:D

Not funny. :mad:

No, I'm actually Saparmurat Niyazov. [/self-deprecation]

~Czardas, Supreme Ruler of the Universe
Please be a real Historian
Eryc Nusbacher(SP)
But hes great!

Tink has the best Threads eva!

I need some advice from some geeks/girlfriends of geeks. How the hell do you get them interested and get them to ask you out?
I'd tell you, but then I'd have to kill you.

AND MY TWINKED-OUT DRAGON KNIGHT IS AT LEVEL 235, WITH MAXED STATS, AND ALL SHADOW MAGIC, EXCEPT FOR DARKNESS OF DOOM.

Or there's another way. Walk up to a guy and grab his nuts. Gently. Like petting a baby kitten. That'll get his attention.

I have your solution, TInk... fellow geeks, tell me if I'm wrong:

Walk up to him.

Take out a handful of regular six sided die, and drop them on the table a few times... studying them intently, until he notices.

When he finally asks you what you are doing, you respond:

"Trying to fail a willpower check so I can kiss you".....

:D
Damn, I forgot my LAME-coat. Does anyone have a DUMB-rella? Because it's LAME-ing out here.

Damn, I forgot my LAME-coat. Does anyone have a DUMB-rella? Because it's LAME-ing out here.

You interrupted my post to badly spell a weather report? Thanks for that...

ah, drugs and alcohol, is there anything they can't do?Well, they can't cure cancer.

ye of little faith

just sit down and talk with this "geek" and flirt a bit

once they realize that you really do like them and are sincire they will come around

it will take a bit longer with geeks than other people because geeks usualy have lower self esteem

oh yes and what kind of geek are we talking about

Ok what if I'm the geek and I really like this girl who is like JV Cheer :rolleyes: but not teh beat if you know what I mean. She's not @ the top of the list so she desprate but desprate enough for a geek like me? help :confused:
AIM: FrozenIon14
Email: Tanewolf14@yahoo.com

Actually it works with pretty much ANYONE, geek, jock, babe, frump, etc. and it works (most of the time) in relational jobs like customer relations or sales or teaching. Surprisingly enough I got this piece of wisdom from a certain magazine for mature readers where the female population sprouts a pair of puffy white ears as part of their costume (you get my drift of course). The story goes there's this girl trying to talk to this guy in a bar and going on about herself, her interests and stuff, trying to get the guy interested in her. The guy excuses himself and then the narrator (a woman) goes up to him and makes a comment, something like 'nice abs, do you work out?'. Basically she gets HIM to talk about himself, mines that for information and offers her own take on that. All the while she's displaying interest in his passions, hobbies, etc. while showing that she's not some dumb blonde for whom looks are the be-all and end-all of life. Bottom line - be genuinely interested in the person, even if you're not too familiar with his interests, you surely can find common ground. There are a TON of cultural references that you can use as conversation topics - this may involve a bit of research (is he into Star Wars - you're lucky if he is, show up in your best Padme Amidala costume with your hair in Cheese Danish buns and start talking Ep3!) but hey that's what geeks do right, you might want to get into the spirit of things.

Of course my girlfriend might have better advice for you - she's the one who's dating a geek :eek:

Best of luck,
His Grace, the Lord Duke of Richmond, Commander of the Host, Lord Admiral of the Blue, Supreme Lord Chancellor of Cathenia, KCVOC {"the BIG Roach Beast"}

http://www.nationstates.net/cgi-bin/index.cgi/target=display_nation/nation=cathenia

Some geeks are pretty hot. :D

I have your solution, TInk... fellow geeks, tell me if I'm wrong:

Walk up to him.

Take out a handful of regular six sided die, and drop them on the table a few times... studying them intently, until he notices.

When he finally asks you what you are doing, you respond:

"Trying to fail a willpower check so I can kiss you".....

:D

That's absolutely brilliant! :D

I suppose it's something only geeks can understand, but if a girl like TInk tried that on me it'd work instantly.

Anyway... TInk, how's it going? Has he talked to you yet??

Second that Aridda! Bloody brilliant Grave_n_idle!! That should be in an advertisment for E3 or something.

His Grace, etc, etc, the Supreme Lord Chancellor of Cathenia

In Soviet Russia, geek gets you!

Now, that said ...

Tink, I promised I'd direct your porn, but I swear to Buddha that if you bring some spotty faced moron, I will haunt you when I die.

truth is, he's a guy. And, regardless on the character of a man, if youre hot and not a total bitch, he'll go out with you.
especially if you are also a geek. This might seem complicated, but remember geeks have very low standardsbut i'm not that hot :(


Well just cause they don't show it, doesn't mean it doesn't hurt them.\

If someone called me a geek, especially a girl I liked, I'd agree, but secretly begin to hate her.they know i don't mean it in a mean way and if they were upset with being called it then trust me, they'd say something!


Well, no offense to Tink, but we've never seen her. For all we know, she may be .... unattractive.well i've posted plenty of pics, but yes, i am unnatractive :(


You look stupid? Forget about him; it won't work.
i was joking :rolleyes: how do you even look stupid anyway?! unless you're blond (which i couldn't be further from being)

Well, they can't cure cancer.


Now I have a serious note. A while ago, you, Tink, made a thread about how hard it is to break up with a "nice guy". You must remember, that a geek is almost always a "nice guy", so you may be falling for the same pit. Just something to think about.Bill isn't like my ex at all

I seem to recall she looks kind of like Eliza Dushku... (Faith, in the Buffy series)...my arse i do :rolleyes:


I have your solution, TInk... fellow geeks, tell me if I'm wrong:

Walk up to him.

Take out a handful of regular six sided die, and drop them on the table a few times... studying them intently, until he notices.

When he finally asks you what you are doing, you respond:

"Trying to fail a willpower check so I can kiss you".....

:Dhaha! that's so cheesey!

That's absolutely brilliant! :D

I suppose it's something only geeks can understand, but if a girl like TInk tried that on me it'd work instantly.

Anyway... TInk, how's it going? Has he talked to you yet??
we talked last night but there was no mention of a message, what did it say?

but i'm not that hot :(

Shows what you know ...

I can imagine how you feel. As a "geek" myself I bet I'd feel the same way if there was a girl I really wanted to ask out. But unfortuantely there aren't any girls I know well enough to ask out. So, hey, I'm jealous of you having the opportunity to ask out someone you really like.

I remember a few months ago I was at a Model United Nations conference and a girl sent a note across to me saying that she fancied me. I thought she was probably only joking and ignored it, but perhaps she wasn't. I don't know. Maybe I should I found out.

Hopefully one day I will be in your position, and I hope I have the nerve to ask a girl out. Who knows? Perhaps if you get over your nervousness and it works out for you, it will help improve my confidence a little.

I've got to go now, but I wish you all the best and I really hope it works out.

Damn, pouring my heart out on an internet forum. I hoped you'd ask him before I had to do this. Oh well, if it works, it was worth it.

It's like the old saying about spiders and other horrible creatures - most of them are probably just as scared as you! But it does take a lot of nerve and resolve to get to that point, particularly when she's drop dead gorgeous. Just remember that they're human with their own dreams, desires, faults and foibles. And don't try to squeeze a round peg into a square slot. Some people are best as friends, some can be more than friends but just because you are friends that doesn't automatically translate to love. Physical beauty isn't everything but taking care of yourself and making yourself look as good as you potentially can does count. Respect yourself and treat her with respect, neither degrading her nor putting her up on a pedestal. And remember when it comes, for it will come, you both need to work at it to make it work.

Best of luck guys and gals,
His Grace, etc etc, the Supreme Lord Chancellor of Cathenia

but i'm not that hot :(


Hahaha, I am the meanest poster on NS - check around, you'll find it is true - and I disagree. You are a quite an attractive young lady.

Edit: damn you! indefinite article, why do I need you anyway?

but i'm not that hot :(
Yes you are. :fluffle:
well i've posted plenty of pics, but yes, i am unnatractive :(
No you aren't. :fluffle:

Ummm ... I'm sorry ... but this:

http://img131.echo.cx/img131/4605/11ickyhair9uo.jpg

is the epitome of "hot".

Deal with it, Tink. :p

my arse it is! you're all filthy liars! :p

Unattractive is hardly the word to describe you. Take care of yourself and you'll be beating 'em off with a stick! Your second photo reminds me of a young Liz Hurley in the Sharpe TV series :eek:

http://images.amazon.com/images/P/B00004U3UN.01._SCMZZZZZZZ_.jpg

Your geek is a very lucky guy, I kid you not.

;) Best of luck FairyTink (the name suits you I think)
His Grace, etc etc, the Supreme Lord Chancellor of Cathenia

my arse it is! you're all filthy liars! :p

Bah! I don't lie.

Unattractive is hardly the word to describe you. Take care of yourself and you'll be beating 'em off with a stick! Your second photo reminds me of a young Liz Hurley in the Sharpe TV series :eek:

Your geek is a very lucky guy, I kid you not.

;) Best of luck FairyTink (the name suits you I think)
His Grace, etc etc, the Supreme Lord Chancellor of Cathenia
well....er...thanks...

Bah! I don't lie.
sure you don't :rolleyes:

sure you don't :rolleyes:

Suit yourself, hun ... but this Geek would do ya.

Incidently, I was President of the chess club.

*drool @ geeks*

Hey baby ^_^ PM me sometime, 'k?

Hey baby ^_^ PM me sometime, 'k?
:rolleyes: this isn't a knockin shop for geeks you know?

:rolleyes: this isn't a knockin shop for geeks you know?

It isn't? Could you please direct me to the knockin shop for geeks? Thanks.

It isn't? Could you please direct me to the knockin shop for geeks? Thanks.
what makes you think i would know where it is? *shiftyeyes*

what makes you think i would know where it is? *shiftyeyes*

There was a picture of you on the flyer.

There was a picture of you on the flyer.
dammit i told them not to use my face on the pics

Why a 'geek' particularly? What attracts you to him?

just wondering,
H.G.etc.S.L.C.Cathenia

Why a 'geek' particularly? What attracts you to him?

just wondering,
H.G.etc.S.L.C.Cathenia
he's smart and cute and a nice guy (unlike the damn chavs) and i dunno, i just like geeks

he's smart and cute and a nice guy (unlike the damn chavs) and i dunno, i just like geeks

Really, that's cool.

Lacedaemon, B.C.E. (summa cum laude), M.C.E, J.D. Esq.

Geeky enough?

I assume she's not referring to the geeks who bite the heads off chickens or pound nails into their nose?

Really, that's cool.

Lacedaemon, B.C.E. (summa cum laude), M.C.E, J.D. Esq.

Geeky enough?
lol

I assume she's not referring to the geeks who bite the heads off chickens or pound nails into their nose?
those kinds are good for one night stands but i couldn't date one

those kinds are good for one night stands but i couldn't date one

That's good - coz while you're certainly a hottie - you're not "bite the head off a chicken to impress her" hot. I'd only do that for Emma Thompson.





Edit: I'm still thinking about the nail in the nose thing, though. You are pretty damn hot. But the chicken is right out.

How's your friendship (relationship?) going? Smooth sailing so far I hope? Just chill and enjoy it. Don't expect too much too fast. If he's as good a man as you feel he is you two should do alright - provided you're 'right' for each other.

Best regards,
H.G.etc.S.L.C.Cathenia

my arse it is! you're all filthy liars! :p
I did not lie. you really ARE fuckin' sexy!

If you say you aren't, I'll brainwash my sister into going after Pure Metal and taking him from you!

those kinds are good for one night stands but i couldn't date one

Shit ... well there goes my chances, then ....

It's probably already been covered, but the easiest way I can think of to attract a 'geek' is to play video games with them. If that doesn't work, you're in trouble.

You've some idea what he likes right? Music-wise, movie-wise, game-wise? Perhaps you could let us know and we could give you some tips on how to approach each or talk about it.

H.G. etc etc Cathenia

No way would I have thought that this would have gone 29 pages or even be a hard question. I've seen Tink's, ahem, 'picture'-you know the one...but I've read a sampling and realised that I have indeed underestimated the problem, and most of the advice I've sampled has been pretty good.

The ones that I've thought where pretty rock-solid:

The Geeks inherent mistrust of the advances of hot women. Scars from Junior High, when puberty could be used as a weapon. The trick is being sincere. In theory, if you are actually sincere this shouldn't be a problem. In theory...(insert well known Simpsons quote)

Here's where I think you might be threading the needle with the 'taking an interest in what he's into' thing-they can smell a faker a mile away and are likely to thing you are patronizing them. In 29 pages this has to have come up. I've had chicks fake the funk with me and it's irratated me before my libido was able to interject with the "dumbass, she's into you..." part. If geekin' out gets you hot, though, let it. Just don't over do it. Mull that over for a second and then keep reading. I'll wait....feel that ambiguity in that instruction? Do this but don't over do it with out any measuring stick to determine what is enough and what is too much? Yeah, geeks live this problem 24/7. They either fuck it up or live in fear of fucking it up all the damn time. Just an insight into the mind set you're dealing with.

Which comes to the 'take the lead' part. Chances are your geek isn't going to want to kill the golden egg laying goose. Finally a hot chick is comfortable around him-best not blow that by over-interpreting her. Your back at that line again, because you'll practically need a marching band, blimp, billboard, and a flashing arrow sign pointing to your lips saying "Kiss me here now" with a picture of him on top of it, but if you come off as too forward he'll instinctively think of it as a put on.

There are geeks that will ask chicks out. Practically any chick that talks to them, usually in a way that really really really puts the chick on the spot. For some dumbass reason a lot of those cats end up telling me all about these little disasters. Since the last thing I can come off as is sympathetic (not entirely true, I mean I'm not a total ass but roll with me) my guess is that they'll lay their tale of woe on just about anybody. I'm also guessing that this is not the variety of geek you're after because a. I'm pretty sure he would have already asked you out b. I'm pretty sure that those dudes put women off and wouldn't be someone you where into and c. wait, c is repeating myself. The list was unneccisary...

Being honest, this was just retreading ideas already posted anyway...why aren't I asleep right now instead of posting long winded responses to well traveled topics? hmmm. Anyway...

I think if you just hang with the cat in a genuine way, eventually you'll find that window where you can press the issue.

You've some idea what he likes right? Music-wise, movie-wise, game-wise? Perhaps you could let us know and we could give you some tips on how to approach each or talk about it.

H.G. etc etc Cathenia
it's ok, i don't really have any problems finding things to talk about with him, we're pretty good friends

how did it go TInk?
I got up to page 14 and went i cant read 10 more pages.sigh....

how did it go TInk?
I got up to page 14 and went i cant read 10 more pages.sigh....
nothing has happened *le sigh*

Well, hey Tink

I'm not going to get into giving you advice cos I think everyone has covered it. Nor am I going to go down the route of telling you that you have to ask me out. If I were you, I'd be tired of everyone telling me what to do right now.

Am I curious tho; you've said a few times in this that you can'task him. what makes you say that?

Well it's a start. You're talking and what's more you're pretty good friends. That's a very good start. Just take it slow my dear and keep your eyes and ears open for opportunity. Love (and good rhetoric) is like fencing = patience, footwork, flair and just enough deadly hits in the right time and place.

I'm off from work now my dear but I wish you all the best!

Check back with you this weekend.
His Grace, the Lord Duke of Richmond, Commander of the Host, Lord Admiral of the Blue, Supreme Lord Chancellor of Cathenia, KCVOC {"the BIG Roach Beast"}

Well, hey Tink

I'm not going to get into giving you advice cos I think everyone has covered it. Nor am I going to go down the route of telling you that you have to ask me out. If I were you, I'd be tired of everyone telling me what to do right now.

Am I curious tho; you've said a few times in this that you can'task him. what makes you say that?
cause i'm too scared

cause i'm too scared
You know at the jr high dance, someone has to cross the floor if anyone is going to do any dancing. He's not going to be the one.

cause i'm too scared

Good answer. Can't help with that one, I'm afraid

Here's a though tho:- I work with a guy who has t-shirt with the quote It's better to die on your feet than live on your knees

cause i'm too scared
of what? rejection?

Scared of what? It's not like you're going to introduce him to your parents or give him a ring or something. Have ice-cream together, watch a movie - Shoot a movie together! (okay I graduated from film school so I'm partial), it's not what you call it (semantics) it's what you do with it.

again best of luck and have a good weekend!
H.G. etc Cathenia

of what? rejection?
yep

cause i'm too scared

Are you going to Northumbria Uni for nursing yet?

Are you going to Northumbria Uni for nursing yet?
i still have to send off my application form actually, i need to write a stupid personal statement and i can't go to Northumbria cause it's already filled up for this year

i still have to send off my application form actually, i need to write a stupid personal statement and i can't go to Northumbria cause it's already filled up for this year

Your not still undecided are you tink?

Your not still undecided are you tink?
i know where i'm applying to now, i just have to write this stupid personal statement

yep
This might be a valid concern, geeks can have a romantic fantasy of martydom thing goin' on. "You're too good for me." Silly rabbits...

I was just thinking back-geeks don't hide shit very well. Here's a great example, one you can build on:

I kinda dug a chick back in high school. In casual conversation she mentions that one of her favorite films was It's a Wonderful Life. So I watched it. Everytime it came on, which was a bunch of times. Waaaaayyyyyy too many. You may be too caught up in this to not notice whether or not you have him on a string. Check it out, if he's doin' way out of the way stuff for you or taking passing comments to some odd extremes you got nothing to worry about-all signs are clear, proceed.

They are so gay...

TInk give it a go!
Your TInk you can do anything and if you cant where does that leave me?

TInk give it a go!
Your TInk you can do anything and if you cant where does that leave me?

In the sea of despair?

In the sea of despair?
On A Road to nowhere in a Sea of Despair!
and its still better than Ashford Kent,Southern England! :p

On A Road to nowhere in a Sea of Dispear!
and its still better than Ashford Kent,Southern England! :p

Shock horror!

Fair enough... Trashford is a piece of sheet!

The road to nowhere is the M25...

Shock horror!

Fair enough... Trashford is a piece of sheet!

The road to nowhere is the M25...
I thought it was the M14?...............

Stokes Valley=Snakes Alley. :gundge:

No, sorry the M25 is the road to hell...

i still have to send off my application form actually, i need to write a stupid personal statement and i can't go to Northumbria cause it's already filled up for this year

Hmm, it is cool.

I would have taken you out for dinner since I go there quite a bit, but that's okay.

Lacedaemon i believe you got TGd!

Moleland does it go to London?

Erm... I don't think so... I think it circles London.. and tourists get lost on it! :D :p

Lacedaemon i believe you got TGd!

Moleland does it go to London?
]

Heh, I never check those things. Taken care of. :)

yep
:(

Don't worry, you'll find that courage someday :)

:(

Don't worry, you'll find that courage someday :)

it's you! *points*

Erm... I don't think so... I think it circles London.. and tourists get lost on it! :D :p Well it could be the Arc De Triumph its ment to have 14 accidents an hour!
Heh, I never check those things. Taken care of. :)
yay

Hmm, it is cool.

I would have taken you out for dinner since I go there quite a bit, but that's okay.
well if you're ever in Leicester/Bristol/Buckinhamshire/Cambridge (whichever one i end up at) I'll let you take me out for dinner

it's you! *points*
:confused:

well if you're ever in Leicester/Bristol/Buckinhamshire/Cambridge (whichever one i end up at) I'll let you take me out for dinner

you should be careful of meeting people from the web, they might be 45 and weigh 300kg.

you should be careful of meeting people from the web, they might be 45 and weigh 300kg.
well i'm not about to say 'ok, meet me down that dark back alley at midnight when there's nobody around' :rolleyes:

Well it could be the Arc De Triumph its ment to have 14 accidents an hour!

yay

Meant.

Fool! Learn to spel

(Intentionial)

:confused:

*Laughs and points*

well i'm not about to say 'ok, meet me down that dark back alley at midnight when there's nobody around' :rolleyes:

they don't have to meet you, they can watch you waiting for them and then follow you home...

:(

Don't worry, you'll find that courage someday :)
TPE nice just nice you just have to twist the knife dont you! :(

Side note whats wit all the itsy bitsy teenie weenie yellow poker dot bikinis err Small sigs?

they don't have to meet you, they can watch you waiting for them and then follow you home...
good point

Meant.

Fool! Learn to spel

(Intentionial)
Spells got too ll's Gumby!
(Intentional)
Dosent have that i as well Clwn!............... . . . .... .. .. .... ... .. .. .. .. . .

good point

it's not paranoia if they ARE out to get you...

good point
*Lurks*... ... (Empty space)......(random filling).... ... .... ... .... .... ..... (Ad your plug here)...(yes you love Harlesburg)....... ......(TInk should cheer up!).. .. .. .. . .(What you thought there was more?)

*Lurks*... ... (Empty space)......(random filling).... ... .... ... .... .... ..... (Ad your plug here)...(yes you love Harlesburg)....... ......(TInk should cheer up!).. .. .. .. . .
I don't need to cheer up, i'm happy, I put James Brown on, that always puts me in a good mood

TPE nice just nice you just have to twist the knife dont you! :(

Side note whats wit all the itsy bitsy teenie weenie yellow poker dot bikinis err Small sigs?

Mods

and Halrseburg, Trying to confuse me hey, I'm more supreme than the supreme being!

I don't need to cheer up, i'm happy, I put James Brown on, that always puts me in a good mood
Sorry Tink i ballsed up that was meant to be White as well oh well stupid!

Mods

and Halrseburg, Trying to confuse me hey, I'm more supreme than the supreme being!
The Supeme Being is in a cardboard box with Srodringers(stuff his stupid name) Cat!

The Supeme Being is in a cardboard box with Srodringers(stuff his stupid name) Cat!

What now?

The Supeme Being is in a cardboard box with Srodringers(stuff his stupid name) Cat!
Schrodinger, I think

What now?
Experiment theorising halflifes and things being alive or dead and you cant know unless you open the box!
Involves Cat and Radiation and JAm and Hover crafts!

I need some advice from some geeks/girlfriends of geeks. How the hell do you get them interested and get them to ask you out?

I've always found, "Hi, wanna catch a movie?" to work pretty well.
(Just ask them without playing games.)

you should be careful of meeting people from the web, they might be 45 and weigh 300kg.

I would just like to say I have met several people off the net & this doesn't apply to any of them

Or me, in fact :p

Schrodinger, I think
Yeah makes more sense i cant really explain it but it was a real eye opener when i watched that theory being debated here last August NS rules!

Experiment theorising halflifes and things being alive or dead and you cant know unless you open the box!
Involves Cat and Radiation and JAm and Hover crafts!

Okay...

*Murders Harlesburg in the most horrible way possible*

*Realises he's a member of MOBRA. Revives him*

I would just like to say I have met several people off the net & this doesn't apply to any of them

Or me, in fact :p
i don't think i'd meet anyone of the net without at least seeing them on webcam

i don't think i'd meet anyone of the net without at least seeing them on webcam

Awwwwww.....

cause i'm too scared

Tink, you have to shut down the part of your brain that thinks! i learned doing this a bit and it really helps. Whenever you get an odd idea, don't think and do it directly. an example:

If you are at home and you are thinking about calling him and asking him to go with you doing something, sprint to the phone and quickly dial his number. If you do it fast enough - so that you don't think of a backup plan - all you can do without sounding very weird is asking him out.

i don't think i'd meet anyone of the net without at least seeing them on webcam

My lack of webcam would've made that a tad difficult!

There's very few people on-line that I haven't met that I would want to meet these days

Awwwwww.....
well no offence but i don't know if you really are who you say you are, i might settle for a lot of pics but i'd still be unsure

Okay...

*Murders Harlesburg in the most horrible way possible*

*Realises he's a member of MOBRA. Revives him*
Hey where did this hole come from my lungs feel funny. :(

Who would organise new Tunnels?

well no offence but i don't know if you really are who you say you are, i might settle for a lot of pics but i'd still be unsure

I only have 2 on the internet.....

You can look at those????? (again)

we talked last night but there was no mention of a message, what did it say?

Well, I'm not going to forward it to you. ;)

But I made it perfectly plain to him that you were interested. That, and he should ask you to go to the cinema, just the two of you. ;) Maybe you just need to give him time while *he* works up his courage to ask you. Unless he's afraid it was a joke (he doesn't know me, after all). Or unless he didn't even get it. He was offline from MSN when I sent it, so it was sent as an e-mail; I can try again when he's online if you like. But if I were you I'd just give him a little while longer to see if he does anything.

If you can get a guy into a place where he's confident, and you're confident, things will just take their natural course. It's like the Art of War says, you must choose the deadly ground. But in this case, you're not at cross purposes.

Back up all your computer data. Find a geek with some quality you find endearing. At a moment that seems opportune. Say you're fed up with windows spyware, and malware. And that you've heard of BSD and other options but you're such a neophyte there's no way you'd be able to install it or use it without help.

If it's some specific geek, wait till he's doing something cool. Walk up to him and say "that's cool" and asking him a question about it that you would like to know the answer too. I know I can't shut up about the stuff I love. People have tried.

If it's someone you know well, invite him over to your place to see a cool movie (I'd recommend something like True Romance, House of Flying Daggers, or maybe Hard Boiled.) Something that shows character and discriminating taste. You could make a play for the hand, but that can be deflected, even unintentionally. (He could make for the remote to adjust the volume, for a drink, his hands could just be sweaty whatever.) The strong move would be to rest your head on him. It can't be easily deflected. He's going to have to commit to a play, or wait for you to make another. If all goes well enough, you can even end the evening with a kiss and still retain at little plausible deniability. But that will kind of mess with a guy's head if he's kept in that kind of limbo.

Fortune favors the bold. The only people who regret the chances they took have to live with catastrophic injury, everyone else regrets the chances they didn't take.

Hey where did this hole come from my lungs feel funny. :(

Who would organise new Tunnels?

People would dig them.

If you wante to go somewhere... Dig! (But avoid houses)