NationStates Jolt Archive

*walks into the castle with a kilt over her face*

man the wind outside is terrible...........does this belong to anyone in here?

*walks into the castle with a kilt over her face*

man the wind outside is terrible...........does this belong to anyone in here?
Where did you get that oversized eyepatch?

Where did you get that oversized eyepatch?


*looks around for a naked person*

i dunno....i was slaughtering a nearby peasant boy and this thing just flew over my face.

Hey! my kilt! I'm glad you found it damn its breezy today. *grabs kilt folds it up n shoves it in back pack* oh well may as well it can't seem to stay on today *sigh*

*bursts out laughing, holding the sides her her body, she falls back on her ever-present pile of tassled pillows*
That is too rare!
*continues to laugh*

*bursts out laughing, holding the sides her her body, she falls back on her ever-present pile of tassled pillows*
That is too rare!
*continues to laugh*
I know you can't help yourself .... oogle away :p

*grabs choqs backpack, takes off assless chaps and puts on his kilt*


how do i look? is it me? or no?

I know you can't help yourself .... oogle away :p
*points and laughs too*

:p

*grabs choqs backpack, takes off assless chaps and puts on his kilt*


how do i look? is it me? or no?

You make anything look good, Peeches.
*she oogles at Choq*

*grabs choqs backpack, takes off assless chaps and puts on his kilt*


how do i look? is it me? or no?
You look better without it

You look better without it


*slides kilt down her legs and kicks it on to LPs head with a flick of her foot*

ok......no kilt. who has my chaps?

*grabs choqs backpack, takes off assless chaps and puts on his kilt*


how do i look? is it me? or no?
yes, but now you must wear it till i take it off.... otherwise you might just die.
that was my favorite kilt. oh well , *puts on other kilt, belted this time* muwhahah... *slides head under peeche's kilt....*

*slides kilt down her legs and kickes it on to LPs head with a flick of her foot*

ok......no kilt. who has my chaps?

under my kilt ... now close your eyes and put your head up there and you'll find them

yes, but now you must wear it till i take it off.... otherwise you might just die.
that was my favorite kilt. oh well , *puts on other kilt, belted this time* muwhahah... *slides head under peeche's kilt....*


:eek:

while youre down there........

:eek:

while youre down there........


anything you need? i seem to have found this candalabra while i being down here *licks peech*

*slides kilt down her legs and kicks it on to LPs head with a flick of her foot*

ok......no kilt. who has my chaps?
*slides chaps down and throws them on Peech's head*

anything you need? i seem to have found this candalabra while i being down here *licks peech*


hey LP left that there last week. he's been looking everywhere for it.....well.....apparently not everywhere

hey LP left that there last week. he's been looking everywhere for it.....well.....apparently not everywhere

glad i could help. anything else you need?

*slides chaps down and throws them on Peech's head*


ok well now that you have a kilt on your head and i have chaps on mine........what do you suggest we do now?

*hopes juggling various fruits while hopping on one foot isnt an option*

*she sits and watches the show... anything with Peeches and LP is always so hot... she bites her lip, while trying to draw the... interesting...*
what the hell is that?

glad i could help. anything else you need?


yes.....yes i do.....can you bring your kilt and some chop sticks to my chambers later?

Juggle vari...... no?.......err......

*shakes kilt off his head*

.... I suggest we jus stay naked until we make something go up

Juggle vari...... no?.......err......

*shakes kilt off his head*

.... I suggest we jus stay naked until we make something go up

*still sitting on her pillows, she blows in his ear*

yes.....yes i do.....can you bring your kilt and some chop sticks to my chambers later?


Of course I can. As it happens i have both on just this moment so you must let me know when to poof in and i shall.... though i do hope you can forgive me for not wearing underpants its been laundry day for the past 3 years and i jsut cant seem to ever get them clean... or well buy any for that matter *feigns look of innocence*

*still sitting on her pillows, she blows in his ear*
*shivers with pleasure*

Juggle vari...... no?.......err......

*shakes kilt off his head*

.... I suggest we jus stay naked until we make something go up


well .........


*takes off her leather vest and puts on two eyepatches as pasties*

this worked b4.....

*tosses curls around in slow motion like in a shampoo commercial*

*shivers with pleasure*

*without moving, she sends a feathery touch to caress his body.*

LP how'd you get so damn lucky... hell i'm about to join them jsut so i can get some action :p

Of course I can. As it happens i have both on just this moment so you must let me know when to poof in and i shall.... though i do hope you can forgive me for not wearing underpants its been laundry day for the past 3 years and i jsut cant seem to ever get them clean... or well buy any for that matter *feigns look of innocence*


dirty is good......real good.


Goddess......bring those vials to my chambers and lets give Choq a..........sip of something .

Must..... resist...........AAAAAAAAAAH

*rapidly eyes Goddess and Peech, unsure which one to pillage first*

dirty is good......real good.


Goddess......bring those vials to my chambers and lets give Choq a..........sip of something .
*poofs to peech's chambers to await her in excitement*

dirty is good......real good.


Goddess......bring those vials to my chambers and lets give Choq a..........sip of something .


I know just the ones to sample...héhéhéhé (that's a French evil laugh)

*she gets up, eyes LP, and blows him a hot, passionate kiss... to use anywhere*

is jolt f-ing up again or is it just me?


pfft im going home anyway....back later

I know just the ones to sample...héhéhéhé (that's a French evil laugh)

*she gets up, eyes LP, and blows him a hot, passionate kiss... to use anywhere*
*catches kiss*

*eyes peech seductively*

Wanna trade?

*dangles the kiss between his thumb and index finger*

ooc *bursts laughing* trade... i love it. c u later, getting out of Dodge (work, that is) be later

*catches kiss*

*eyes peech seductively*

Wanna trade?

*dangles the kiss between his thumb and index finger*


*drools*

you know i will do anything for a chocolate kiss.......what do you want??

*drools*

you know i will do anything for a chocolate kiss.......what do you want??
I want you to juggle various fruits while hopping on one leg

:p

OOC: :fluffle: Later TCG

I want you to juggle various fruits while hopping on one leg

:p

OOC: :fluffle: Later TCG


damnit i knew he was going to say that!


*juggles an apple, a grapefruit, a peach and a banana.........hops*

damnit i knew he was going to say that!


*juggles an apple, a grapefruit, a peach and a banana.........hops*
Now juggle these.... kiwis too.

*sneaks into the next room by sliding along the floor still covered by the bearskin rug*
*discovers it's a bedroom*
Very interesting...

Now juggle these.... kiwis too.


LOL@ kiwi's ;-)


*begins to break dance while juggling*


look its Randomea! *tosses her a kiwi*

LOL@ kiwi's ;-)


*begins to break dance while juggling*


look its Randomea! *tosses her a kiwi*
AAAH!

*smacks Peech on the ass*

No throwing my kiwis

AAAH!

*smacks Peech on the ass*

No throwing my kiwis


oops.....*kisses kiwi's * sorry boys

*tosses it back*
I prefer my kiwis skinned...and you don't see me! Er...growl, grr..honey!

*tosses it back*
I prefer my kiwis skinned...and you don't see me! Er...growl, grr..honey!


*hallucinating from all the hopping on one foot, she thinks she saw Randomea but really she didnt*


can i stop now LP?????

*hallucinating from all the hopping on one foot, she thinks she saw Randomea but really she didnt*


can i stop now LP?????
Yes.

Now. Where do you want it?

Yes.

Now. Where do you want it?


*pants*

yo...you know........pant......you know exactly where

*pants*

yo...you know........pant......you know exactly where
Pants?

*flutters it around the peach, teasingly*

*turns up wearing a grass skirt and a coconut bra*

*tries to look serious*

Evening.

*does a little hula dancing*

*turns up wearing a grass skirt and a coconut bra*

*tries to look serious*

Evening.

*does a little hula dancing*


*tries not to giggle*

Evening. And just how are you?

Pants?

*flutters it around the peach, teasingly*


just put it in the same vicinity as you put those kiwis last night.

just put it in the same vicinity as you put those kiwis last night.
Well that could be anywhere.....

*brushes slightly over the insides of Peech's thighs*

*tries not to giggle*

Evening. And just how are you?
A bit worried. My first ever real paycheck came through last week, and I've spent most of it.

I bought a film called pi. I don't remember buying it, or most of the others. Possibly because I was a bit...wasted. Anyone ever seen this? It's a cult film, or something :confused:

*looks out increduously from the bear's open mouth*

A bit worried. My first ever real paycheck came through last week, and I've spent most of it.

I bought a film called pi. I don't remember buying it, or most of the others. Possibly because I was a bit...wasted. Anyone ever seen this? It's a cult film, or something :confused:
I've seen it. It's okay.

I've seen it. It's okay.
Ah, but the ultimate question - is it worth £6.66?

Ah, but the ultimate question - is it worth £6.66?
Sorry mate, but no.

Sorry mate, but no.
Bugger.

*adjusts coconut bra, tries to alter the film list*

Bugger.

*adjusts coconut bra, tries to alter the film list*
Got milk?

for some reason i have the sudden urge to sip on a pina colada and yell HARGH while rolling a kiwi in one hand while twirling my fingers through a grass skirt with the other......but i must be off. maybe tomorrow....


*puts assless chaps back on and keeps the kilt to model later*

Got milk?
*hands LP a pint of milk*

It's cows milk. Sorry, I can't express. Or can I...?
for some reason i have the sudden urge to sip on a pina colada and yell HARGH while rolling a kiwi in one hand while twirling my fingers through a grass skirt with the other......but i must be off. maybe tomorrow....


*puts assless chaps back on and keeps the kilt to model later*
*imagines the scene*

*removes the kiwi and pina colada*

*is satisfied*

Byeee!

*plants the kiss firmly on Peech's buttock*

Watch the monkeybites. Bye :fluffle:

*is conveniently 'in the way'*
*catches hold of a foot with one paw*

http://www.okcupid.com/tests/take?testid=15304915120826511247

This seemed rather appropriate in here ;)

I'm 45% kinky

http://www.okcupid.com/tests/take?testid=15304915120826511247

This seemed rather appropriate in here ;)

I'm 45% kinky

Are you bored?
...
I'm Pretty kinky! btw
Grats! You're 72% kinky!
You kinkscore is pretty high. Most likely you're up for trying anything at least once, which show open-mindedness. You're probably a great lay, so just keep doing that thing you do!

Are you bored?
...
I'm Pretty kinky! btw
Grats! You're 72% kinky!
You kinkscore is pretty high. Most likely you're up for trying anything at least once, which show open-mindedness. You're probably a great lay, so just keep doing that thing you do!
Yeah..... But with that kinky mind of yours, I'm sure we can make something up

Yeah..... But with that kinky mind of yours, I'm sure we can make something up

*naughty laugh*
Who knew? maybe I should put that in my next on-line dating profile... i can already see all the weirdos coming out of the woodwork...

*naughty laugh*
Who knew? maybe I should put that in my next on-line dating profile... i can already see all the weirdos coming out of the woodwork...
Hey! Did you have to start insulting me? :(

Hey! Did you have to start insulting me? :(
LOL!!!
You don't fall into that category, believe me. If you'd written to me, I'd have snatched you up quicker than Gene's tornado snatching up a beer can...


( :eek: where the hell did that comparison come from?)

LOL!!!
You don't fall into that category, believe me. If you'd written to me, I'd have snatched you up quicker than Gene's tornado snatching up a beer can...


( :eek: where the hell did that comparison come from?)
The mouth spills what the mind is full of. ;)

The mouth spills what the mind is full of. ;)


After trying to upgrade my pc last night and f*cking it all up, having to drag it into work to have my IT buddies look into it... yeah I thin I have beer on the brain... more like a keg of it... right now.

All the tugging... and inserting... and smearing artic silver... and cutting fingers... and sucking blood... I was both very aroused and irrate... how does that happen?

After trying to upgrade my pc last night and f*cking it all up, having to drag it into work to have my IT buddies look into it... yeah I thin I have beer on the brain... more like a keg of it... right now.

All the tugging... and inserting... and smearing artic silver... and cutting fingers... and sucking blood... I was both very aroused and irrate... how does that happen?
*ponders*

Did it have something to do with this?

*swings a pair of cuffs on his index finger*

*ponders*

Did it have something to do with this?

*swings a pair of cuffs on his index finger*

*evil laugh*
well, that's what I wanted to do to the guy that was talking me through it, those, hot wax and the whip...

*evil laugh*
well, that's what I wanted to do to the guy that was talking me through it, those, hot wax and the whip...
IT guys are hot when they're all tied up and squirming..... ;)

IT guys are hot when they're all tied up and squirming..... ;)

*naughty laugh*
Did I ever tell you about a story I wrote? Me... IT consultant... locked server room... very loud ventilation system? Very naughty...
*fans herself*

*naughty laugh*
Did I ever tell you about a story I wrote? Me... IT consultant... locked server room... very loud ventilation system? Very naughty...
*fans herself*
*fans Goddess with the kilt he got yesterday*

Server eh?

*fans Goddess with the kilt he got yesterday*

Server eh?

*falls on her tassled pillow pile*
My, yes... him kneeling... my hands twitching to grab his... locks... the convenient file cabinet...
*swoons*

*falls on her tassled pillow pile*
My, yes... him kneeling... my hands twitching to grab his... locks... the convenient file cabinet...
*swoons*
*puts on geeky glasses and kneels*

Like this?

*puts on geeky glasses and kneels*

Like this?

Well, you're back is to me... and I scare the living daylights out of you because you don't hear me approach you (ventilation, you understand)... I muss your hair... then we look for the cable...we pull until it's taut... it has to reach the connector, you see...

Kinky bastard!
Grats! You're 87% kinky!
Well well well, you kinky bastard! Most likely you're into some weird shit, which is always great. Consider mailing the author of this test, and keep up the good work ;)

You scored higher than 94% on kinkpoints


I think this means I'm ......fun

Well, you're back is to me... and I scare the living daylights out of you because you don't hear me approach you (ventilation, you understand)... I muss your hair... then we look for the cable...we pull until it's taut... it has to reach the connector, you see...
*pushes glasses a bit up his nose*

Ah....

*tries to plug up Goddess*

Drat. Do you have a router?

Pretty kinky!
Grats! You're 72% kinky!
You kinkscore is pretty high. Most likely you're up for trying anything at least once, which show open-mindedness. You're probably a great lay, so just keep doing that thing you do!

i sat through 28 questions for it to tell me that?? Pfft. Probably a great lay???


I scored higher than 64% kinkpoints......all these test are off. Its a conspiracy.

Pretty kinky!
Grats! You're 72% kinky!
You kinkscore is pretty high. Most likely you're up for trying anything at least once, which show open-mindedness. You're probably a great lay, so just keep doing that thing you do!

i sat through 28 questions for it to tell me that?? Pfft. Probably a great lay???


I scored higher than 64% kinkpoints......all these test are off. Its a conspiracy.
Kinkpoints? :confused:

Pretty kinky!
Grats! You're 72% kinky!
You kinkscore is pretty high. Most likely you're up for trying anything at least once, which show open-mindedness. You're probably a great lay, so just keep doing that thing you do!

i sat through 28 questions for it to tell me that?? Pfft. Probably a great lay???


I scored higher than 64% kinkpoints......all these test are off. Its a conspiracy.
Kinky :D

Pretty kinky!
Grats! You're 72% kinky!
You kinkscore is pretty high. Most likely you're up for trying anything at least once, which show open-mindedness. You're probably a great lay, so just keep doing that thing you do!

i sat through 28 questions for it to tell me that?? Pfft. Probably a great lay???


I scored higher than 64% kinkpoints......all these test are off. Its a conspiracy.

I'm sure between us we could come up with something quite fun.... and then I will tell you how great you are and do the venerable worship thing, and then have at it again... or something... might just skip step 2 and go straight to step 3

I'm sure between us we could come up with something quite fun.... and then I will tell you how great you are and do the venerable worship thing, and then have at it again... or something... might just skip step 2 and go straight to step 3


lol...you are such a dedicated Kazooer ;) What did you score?


Gene...I dunno what kinkpoints are but if its anything like I think it is....I bet I have aquired a lot being a member of this thread

Kinky bastard!
Grats! You're 87% kinky!
Well well well, you kinky bastard! Most likely you're into some weird shit, which is always great. Consider mailing the author of this test, and keep up the good work

You scored higher than 94% on kinkpoints

Gene...I dunno what kinkpoints are but if its anything like I think it is....I bet I have aquired a lot being a member of this thread
I see. thanks :)

Kinky bastard!
Grats! You're 87% kinky!
Well well well, you kinky bastard! Most likely you're into some weird shit, which is always great. Consider mailing the author of this test, and keep up the good work

You scored higher than 94% on kinkpoints


whoa......hel-looo Choq.....How YOU doin? ;)

*pushes glasses a bit up his nose*

Ah....

*tries to plug up Goddess*

Drat. Do you have a router?

*rummages through pockets... no wait she never has pockets... ponders*
YOu don't really need a router... but we have to insulate against heat...Perhaps this would do?
*presents tube or arctic silver*

is there a link to this "kinky" test?

Peeches, we are so alike, it's scary... and love that kinky tude. I have a story about us... I didn,t write it but I was told I could share it... if you'd like to see... *naughty laugh*


And Choq... *weak in the knees*

whoa......hel-looo Choq.....How YOU doin? ;)


quit well peech, and how about yourself *bows slightly taking your hand to kiss it reaching around behind you to caress your assets* :fluffle:

Peeches, we are so alike, it's scary... and love that kinky tude. I have a story about us... I didn,t write it but I was told I could share it... if you'd like to see... *naughty laugh*


And Choq... *weak in the knees*



i wanna see like you wouldnt believe :eek:

no wait...I'm sure you would believe it my lover

Aspiring Champion
You scored 66% Sexual Mastery!
how good are you in bed? (http://www.okcupid.com/tests/take?testid=1378009475661937782)

i wanna see like you wouldnt believe :eek:

no wait...I'm sure you would believe it my lover

I'll mail it to you... give me a minute...


EDIT: Done! Hotmail account

is there a link to this "kinky" test?

yeah its a few pages back

*rummages through pockets... no wait she never has pockets... ponders*
YOu don't really need a router... but we have to insulate against heat...Perhaps this would do?
*presents tube or arctic silver*
My my.

*fumbles with the tube*

You do it..... I can't seem to get a steady hand around you

OOC: Curious. Can I read it too?

Aspiring Champion
You scored 73% Sexual Mastery!
You scored over average, which means you know the basics - and a bit more. You're probably sexually experienced, or you've really done your homework. Well done! You can, as opposed to many others, say you know at least the basics of sexual pleasure. You probably know that porn isn't a good source for sexual guidance. Keep gaining experience and knowledge, and you might eventually become master!

My my.

*fumbles with the tube*

You do it..... I can't seem to get a steady hand around you

OOC: Curious. Can I read it too?

*opens the tube, applies a bead of paste, and smears*
I think that should avoid over-heating...


ooc too bad I don't have the server one with me... I'll get you that one later tonight... If Peeches says yes, then okay

i have a fwe too.... anywant them if i can find them?

i have a fwe too.... anywant them if i can find them?

Are you kidding?
Of course we want them!
sweetceleste@hotmail.com

Grats! You're 30% kinky!
Your kinkscore is around average. Most likely you are fairly accepting of other peoples kinky tendencies, but don't practice them much yourself. Consider trying new stuff to spice up your sexlife if you feel it's necessary ;)



My test tracked 1 variable How you compared to other people your age and gender:

You scored higher than 6% on kinkpoints

Aspiring Champion
You scored 75% Sexual Mastery!
You scored over average, which means you know the basics - and a bit more. You're probably sexually experienced, or you've really done your homework. Well done! You can, as opposed to many others, say you know at least the basics of sexual pleasure. You probably know that porn isn't a good source for sexual guidance. Keep gaining experience and knowledge, and you might eventually become master!



thats it...these tests are wrong. Noway are Goddess and I aspiring champions! We are masters!!!!

Sex God/Goddess
Congratulations! You scored 37%!
You scored higher than 97% on Sexmasters

sex freak (http://www.okcupid.com/tests/take?testid=13701046572716661396)

thats it...these tests are wrong. Noway are Goddess and I aspiring champions! We are masters!!!!
You can be my master :fluffle: *kneels before you handing you end of leash*

thats it...these tests are wrong. Noway are Goddess and I aspiring champions! We are masters!!!!

Stupid questions about how long men are... What does that matter to me? And how can it affect MY performance? Okay, so I've been known to laugh when I see my partner's... equipment, but it's all in good fun...


EDIT
Sex God/Goddess
Congratulations! You scored 35%!
Everyone should bow down to you. Your bedroom is an adult playground. Cum one Cum all. You've done everything with everyone/thing.

My test tracked 1 variable How you compared to other people your age and gender:

You scored higher than 94% on Sexmasters
isn't that obvious...

Congratulations! You scored 4%!
Same old, Same old. Don't like advature, or too shy to ask for it. Plain ol' Missionary. No accessories (what if they should be found!!!)



My test tracked 1 variable How you compared to other people your age and gender:

You scored higher than 2% on Sexmasters

Jeez, i'm so dull. :p

lol

I don't know how big I am. I never measured.

http://img189.echo.cx/img189/5925/hargh8cw.jpg

Boy/Girl Next Door
You scored 56% Sexual Mastery!
You're pretty average on the mastery scale, which means that you've had some sexual experience, or at least have the brains to obtain a minimum of knowledge about sex. But still, you most likely haven't reached your full potential yet (which may be a good thing). Go home, practice, read a book, try Google - there's much more to learn (porn is really no good source of information)! Good luck on your path to sexual mastery! If you scored over 60% you're close to Champion!

You scored higher than 94% on Sexmasters
isn't that obvious...

it appears im kinkier than you and scored higher on the sex god/goddess quiz... wanna try me out?

*licks your neck*

I don't know how big I am. I never measured.

http://img189.echo.cx/img189/5925/hargh8cw.jpg

Boy/Girl Next Door
You scored 56% Sexual Mastery!
You're pretty average on the mastery scale, which means that you've had some sexual experience, or at least have the brains to obtain a minimum of knowledge about sex. But still, you most likely haven't reached your full potential yet (which may be a good thing). Go home, practice, read a book, try Google - there's much more to learn (porn is really no good source of information)! Good luck on your path to sexual mastery! If you scored over 60% you're close to Champion!

Stick with us LP, we'll get that boy-next-door 'tude all sorted out.

Can I lick that?

OK....I can barely type after that story Goddess. sigh.....my god. Youve got mail

*fans self*

it appears im kinkier than you and scored higher on the sex god/goddess quiz... wanna try me out?

*licks your neck*

*evil laugh*
I'm always ready for a new adventure...

OK....I can barely type after that story Goddess. sigh.....my god. Youve got mail

*fans self*

*evil laugh*
I know...
*fans herself*

hello all.

Stick with us LP, we'll get that boy-next-door 'tude all sorted out.

Can I lick that?
I'm still young. I can lea..... HOLY MOTHER OF NAKED JESUS

*squirms as he would have slunk though his knees if he only had any*

the cut, fresh and deep
The blood, so thick and sweet.
A fissure flowing swift.
ecstacy bleeding from the rift,
unto me comes.
Your lovely sweet lips
sucking my life into your kiss,
no remorse, no pain
drink of me, my love,
again and again.

hello all.


hello your oddness........*french kisses him hello*

some civilian test taker person came by this morning and knocked on the castle door.....we put her on the rack but we kept her tests and took them. Here you do it too:

http://www.okcupid.com/tests/take?testid=1378009475661937782

http://www.okcupid.com/tests/take?testid=15304915120826511247

Pretty kinky!
Grats! You're 54% kinky!
You kinkscore is pretty high. Most likely you're up for trying anything at least once, which show open-mindedness. You're probably a great lay, so just keep doing that thing you do!

Damn straight I'm a great lay. I think. Er...

EDIT: Checked the great lay thing, and...

Boy Next Door
You scored 65% Sexual Mastery!
You're pretty average on the mastery scale, which means that you've had some sexual experience, or at least have the brains to obtain a minimum of knowledge about sex. But still, you most likely haven't reached your full potential yet (which may be a good thing). Go home, practice, read a book, try Google - there's much more to learn (porn is really no good source of information)! Good luck on your path to sexual mastery! If you scored over 60% you're close to Champion!

the cut, fresh and deep
The blood, so thick and sweet.
A fissure flowing swift.
ecstacy bleeding from the rift,
unto me comes.
Your lovely sweet lips
sucking my life into your kiss,
no remorse, no pain
drink of me, my love,
again and again.


Kissed by lips of Aphrodite.
Child of beauty.
Radiant design.

Eyes of blissful, crystal pleasure.
Paradise, in
Mortal paradigm.

Loveliness. Delight. Exquisite kiss.
Exotic blossom,
One refined

Lyrical elucidation
Of perfection.
Angel, intertwined,

Exquisitely, with wonder,
Awe and rapture,
Dream of the Divine…

Yet, breathless, hungry. Passion.
Sweet, enchanting,
Fair desire of mine.

the cut, fresh and deep
The blood, so thick and sweet.
A fissure flowing swift.
ecstacy bleeding from the rift,
unto me comes.
Your lovely sweet lips
sucking my life into your kiss,
no remorse, no pain
drink of me, my love,
again and again.

ooc *squirms on office chair* thanks a lot...

Pretty kinky!
Grats! You're 54% kinky!
You kinkscore is pretty high. Most likely you're up for trying anything at least once, which show open-mindedness. You're probably a great lay, so just keep doing that thing you do!

Damn straight I'm a great lay. I think. Er...


I fully intend on finding out my little crumpet ;)


*files nails*

You are 94 fuckable!
Yeah, you're fuckable. Probably fucked, too. You can be so wild sometimes that you may even be, well, how should I put this nicely, easy. Wild and kinky is good, but you should lean to use it in maderation. Hold out a bit when it comes to having sex with a new person. It's ok to play hard-to-get once and a while. In fact, it makes you even sexier!

http://www.okcupid.com/tests/take?testid=7218933383172273370

[QUOTE=Peechland]Kissed by lips of Aphrodite.
Child of beauty.
Radiant design.

[QUOTE]

Another Goddess? I'm crushed...
*wets lips*

ooc *squirms on office chair* thanks a lot...

being storyless atm... i could always make one up just for you ... *grins evilly*

*reads Corner Chair again*

*reads Corner Chair again*

shouldnt you be pillaging?

shouldnt you be pillaging?
Nah. I prefer reading. I pillaged the kazoo's library last week, so I think I'm good for another, oh, century or so.

*reads Corner Chair again*

LOL
like it? *eyes fluttering*
I can start a mailing list...

hello your oddness........*french kisses him hello*

some civilian test taker person came by this morning and knocked on the castle door.....we put her on the rack but we kept her tests and took them. Here you do it too:

http://www.okcupid.com/tests/take?testid=1378009475661937782

http://www.okcupid.com/tests/take?testid=15304915120826511247
*cough*
The Novice
You scored 41% Sexual Mastery!
Young, inexperienced, pure..? Or you've had a few partners? But innocence is no excuse for being lame in bed. Read some books, try Google, whatever. If you gain more experience, you might eventually be "good" in bed, but please - don't use porn as a guide to lovemaking. You prove that kids need to learn about sex in school!




My test tracked 1 variable How you compared to other people your age and gender:

You scored higher than 5% on Sexual Mastery

Vanilla boy/girl
Grats! You're 36% kinky!
Your kinkscore is around average. Most likely you are fairly accepting of other peoples kinky tendencies, but don't practice them much yourself. Consider trying new stuff to spice up your sexlife if you feel it's necessary ;)




My test tracked 1 variable How you compared to other people your age and gender:

You scored higher than 14% on kinkpoints
*cough*
:rolleyes:

being storyless atm... i could always make one up just for you ... *grins evilly*

*naughty smile*
bring them on... I may even share some with you... maybe *sweet smile*

fair enough

I fully intend on finding out my little crumpet ;)


*files nails*
*prepares stone slab in the dungeon*

*strips until he wears little except a sock and a smile (think RHCP)*

[QUOTE=Peechland]Kissed by lips of Aphrodite.
Child of beauty.
Radiant design.

[QUOTE]

Another Goddess? I'm crushed...
*wets lips*


no no...you are the only Goddess as far as the eye can see.....*looks longingly at Goddess*

LOL
like it? *eyes fluttering*
I can start a mailing list...
I used to read LOADS of that stuff. Entire books. I love written pornography

I used to read LOADS of that stuff. Entire books. I love written pornography
I have others that are more erotic that porn... and that comes from a guy's persepctive, not mine.

" The good fuck"
You are 64 fuckable!
You're about as fuckable as most people, which is not bad. Actually, it's quite healthy! You know how to act and what's appropriate. You know when it's the time and place for what. And people can use that to see you erotically. It's no surprise that you can attract a good number of people. You're what they want! A realistic babe who knows when to get a bit wild! Yeah, I'd fuck you!




My test tracked 1 variable How you compared to other people your age and gender:

You scored higher than 44% on humpers

kind of makes up for my other results. :)

I have others that are more erotic that porn... and that comes from a guy's persepctive, not mine.
*begs for more, on his knees if he had any*

You know how I love to use my imagination.

[QUOTE=The Chocolate Goddess][QUOTE=Peechland]Kissed by lips of Aphrodite.
Child of beauty.
Radiant design.




no no...you are the only Goddess as far as the eye can see.....*looks longingly at Goddess*

*she reaches for her lover's golden locks, and gently pulls her Peeches in. with her tongue and lips, she gently teases her, while one hand caresses her back and assets*

I have others that are more erotic that porn... and that comes from a guy's persepctive, not mine.

i wanna see *begs n strips* do with me as you will

*begs for more, on his knees if he had any*

You know how I love to use my imagination.

Alright! But I don't have them at work. You'll have to wait until I get home and get my PC up and running...

Who knows, I may have time to write more
*evil grin*

i wanna see *begs n strips* do with me as you will

Send me a mail, I'll susbscribe you to the list... héhéhéhéhéhé }:

Alright! But I don't have them at work. You'll have to wait until I get home and get my PC up and running...

Who knows, I may have time to write more
*evil grin*
Oh my. You write stuff like this yourself?

Oh my. You write stuff like this yourself?

LOL!
Of course.

LOL!
Of course.
*losses teh abiltlyt o typpes*

*walks up to peech wearin a kilt eye liner and sleeveless trench, and begins to massage her neck and shoulders deeply bending neck to kiss her exposed flesh and caress her with his warm breath*

*losses teh abiltlyt o typpes*

LMAO

There goes my reputation...err... no, wait... that is my rep here!
*smiles happily, putting pen to paper*

ooc: why do you guys think TCG has been seen writing in her diary and drawing recently? lol

screw PC......

the Kazoo is where its at. *subscribes to mailing list*



*she embraces the savory flavor of Goddesses lips ...its like sweet nectar that rejuvenates her ....she can feel it coursing through her body. The heat between their bodies ignites the succulent fragrance of passion and fills the room.*

LMAO

There goes my reputation...err... no, wait... that is my rep here!
*smiles happily, putting pen to paper*

ooc: why do you guys think TCG has been seen writing in her diary and drawing recently? lol
Now I want to write too ;)

*climbs the wall*

Now I want to write too ;)

me too....
this could be dangerous

*eats a jam sandwich*

Yeah. Jam is where it's at...

*hides*

*walks up to peech wearin a kilt eye liner and sleeveless trench, and begins to massage her neck and shoulders deeply bending neck to kiss her exposed flesh and caress her with his warm breath*


*drools at Choq's outfit*

My my.....this is enough to make me surrender my saber for a little while.

me.you.my chambers.now.

*levitates*
*whips everyone from above*

screw PC......

the Kazoo is where its at. *subscribes to mailing list*



*she embraces the savory flavor of Goddesses lips ...its like sweet nectar that rejuvenates her ....she can feel it coursing through her body. The heat between their bodies ignites the succulent fragrance of passion and fills the room.*

LMAO
NO, I mean that my PC, my computer is off line because I tried to upgrade the motherboard... and I think I may have fried the new one... LOL I'll get it fixed and be on-line again

LMAO
NO, I mean that my PC, my computer is off line because I tried to upgrade the motherboard... and I think I may have fried the new one... LOL I'll get it fixed and be on-line again
(psst. PC as in Paradise Club)

LMAO
NO, I mean that my PC, my computer is off line because I tried to upgrade the motherboard... and I think I may have fried the new one... LOL I'll get it fixed and be on-line again


oh i meant screw paradise club ;-)

:rolleyes: nevermind

*drools at Choq's outfit*

My my.....this is enough to make me surrender my saber for a little while.

me.you.my chambers.now.

*smiles* hoped you'd say that. *bites your neck*

oh i meant screw paradise club ;-)

Well, I've been trying... but there are no willing partners... maybe I'm too sweet there...

*levitates*
*whips everyone from above*
*laughs at the odd one because he's shorter than the rest*

Well, I've been trying... but there are no willing partners... maybe I'm too sweet there...
more fun here anyway ;)

Well, I've been trying... but there are no willing partners... maybe I'm too sweet there...
And they don't appreciate explicit sexual stuff in there. :(

*laughs at the odd one because he's shorter than the rest*
*pours hot oil over LP*

*pours hot oil over LP*
hey LP now who's laughing *muwahahaha*

hey LP now who's laughing *muwahahaha*
*throws a shoe at choq*

*pours hot oil over LP*
That's hot

*rubs it gently over his chest*

*throws a shoe at choq*


*pulls kilt up facing odd*... :p

And they don't appreciate explicit sexual stuff in there. :(

*sigh*
I know, I know...

*goes back to writing and sketching*

*sigh*
I know, I know...

*goes back to writing and sketching*

*gives her something to write n sketch about*

*feels odd*

*hears a shout*

Oh sorry dude. :eek:

*feels lonely*

sketches???? you mean.......sigh.



*walks over to the hot oil and rubs over her body to make it glisten*

now I'm all shiny

sketches???? you mean.......sigh.



*walks over to the hot oil and rubs over her body to make it glisten*

now I'm all shiny
Ooh.... rub up to me some more

*feels odd*

*hears a shout*

Oh sorry dude. :eek:

*feels lonely*


*brings Tribes another sandwich*

I know how you love sandwiches darling ;)

*feels odd*

*hears a shout*

Oh sorry dude. :eek:

*feels lonely*
again! :headbang:

well, I guess i could do worse.... :rolleyes:

*falls asleep*

*uses his super power to turn into giant teddy bear*

*gives her something to write n sketch about*

*grabs the stick pastel*
I really like when I rub it, like that... isn't that a nice effect?

*brings Tribes another sandwich*

I know how you love sandwiches darling ;)
Thanks Peech

*runs off to fall asleep in his room of hidden sandwiches*
again!

well, I guess i could do worse....

*falls asleep
*offers a sandwich bed*

*levitates*
*wakes up* :eek:
*falls* :mad:

*grabs the stick pastel*
I really like when I rub it, like that... isn't that a nice effect?

great effect, but you missed the trumpeters of heaven flying around me as i show you my kiwis

sketches???? you mean.......sigh.



*walks over to the hot oil and rubs over her body to make it glisten*

now I'm all shiny

*oogles her lovers shiny peaches*
Yummy...
*licks her lips*

great effect, but you missed the trumpeters of heaven flying around me as i show you my kiwis

*draws again, her tongue sticking out, invitingly*
Would you happen to have a bigger stick of chalk?

great effect, but you missed the trumpeters of heaven flying around me as i show you my kiwis
oh! I em... borrrowed one of your trumpeters by the way. I'll just remove it from this peasant...

you might want to clean it before you use it again. :eek:

*tries to grab a kiwi but she's too slippery from the oil*

I guess I'll just have to bathe myself now. *Enters shower and lathers up*

oh! I em... borrrowed one of your trumpeters by the way. I'll just remove it from this peasant...

you might want to clean it before you use it again. :eek:
you can keep him.... he's very good at cooking *nods*

*tries to grab a kiwi but she's too slippery from the oil*

I guess I'll just have to bathe myself now. *Enters shower and lathers up*
*follows with a sponge*

Need someone to scrub your back? Or front? or both?

*draws again, her tongue sticking out, invitingly*
Would you happen to have a bigger stick of chalk?

as a matter of fact i do *hands you chalk, then playfully licks your cheek*

as a matter of fact i do *hands you chalk, then playfully licks your cheek*

*giggles and licks back*
What an interesting texture... and much softer than my oth... no.. wait... it's getting harder
*starts to rub the chalk*

*follows with a sponge*

Need someone to scrub your back? Or front? or both?
bottom?

*giggles and licks back*
What an interesting texture... and much softer than my oth... no.. wait... it's getting harder
*starts to rub the chalk*

yes well it tends to do that when you rub it..... the hard center can be used for all kinds of thing... i find it quite fun to play with

*follows with a sponge*

Need someone to scrub your back? Or front? or both?


you know I do...

*turns water pressure down a notch so she can feel the flow of the water on her skin. LP watches the water droplets trickle down her body......*

you know I do...

*turns water pressure down a notch so she can feel the flow of the water on her skin. LP watches the water droplets trickle down her body......*
*gathers Peech's hair in one hand and starts washing her back*

yes well it tends to do that when you rub it..... the hard center can be used for all kinds of thing... i find it quite fun to play with

*evil grin*
really? Let's see what I can do with it...
*massaging the chalk with both hands, she applies the powder to the paper...*

I wonder what kind of effects I can get if I get it wet?


ooc back in 10 mins

*slays peasants*

*flays peasants*

*makes peasant filet*

*evil grin*
really? Let's see what I can do with it...
*massaging the chalk with both hands, she applies the powder to the paper...*

I wonder what kind of effects I can get if I get it wet?


ooc back in 10 mins

why dont you try, I've not wetted it yet could be interesting

*slays peasants*

*flays peasants*

*makes peasant filet*


*yells out from the shower*

I see you peeking in!

*yells out from the shower*

I see you peeking in!
*sighs*
*takes down camera*

*sighs*
*takes down camera*


no, dont take it down......zoom in.

no, dont take it down......zoom in.
*erects tripod*
*adjusts focus*

*yells out from the shower*

I see you peeking in!
*puts a hand over Peech's mouth and whispers in her ear, pushing his body against her clean back*
Save your breath for later

*sponges up her buttcheeks*

*slays peasants*

*flays peasants*

*makes peasant filet*
you best be sharing!

Peasant Filet? Meh. *eats waffles*
I like waffles...

*picks a skull from the skull tree*
been neglecting the garden of late
*waters the whips&chains bush*

Peasant Filet? Meh. *eats waffles*
I like waffles...
*steals waffles*

So do I, bitch.

*eats them right in front of Monotonous*

*yells out from the shower*

I see you peeking in!
So? It's not the first time I've seen you and LP going hell for leather. :eek:

you best be sharing!
Damn straight. Here, have some peasant filet on Monotonous' waffles.

Damn straight. Here, have some peasant filet on Monotonous' waffles.

ohhhhhhhhh it's like an orgasm!!!! *moans delighted*

why dont you try, I've not wetted it yet could be interesting

*she licks the stick of chalk, and then decide to put it in her mouth and pull it out again*

*puts a hand over Peech's mouth and whispers in her ear, pushing his body against her clean back*
Save your breath for later

*


*gulp*

*gasp*

*imagines this whole scene in detail*


siiiiiiiiigh........

.... my waffles.....

*gulp*

*gasp*

*imagines this whole scene in detail*


siiiiiiiiigh........
Why are you imagining when you can live it?

*kisses her neck while soaping up her belly*

just an observation...but i think its humorous that we have 400+ replies on this thread but over 2000 views......do you think people just pop in to see what madness we have going on? *giggles*


*goes back to being washed slowly and throroughly*

.... my waffles.....
...were damn good. Mmm, tasty waffles. All the more tasty because they were stolen.

THAT'S RIGHT KIDS! STEALING MAKES EVERYTHING TASTE BETTER! LIFE IS MORE FUN!

*zooms in*

*she licks the stick of chalk, and then decide to put it in her mouth and pull it out again*
*pushes her hair back to see her face* I think if you keep this up the chalk will transform shortly

*hisses happily at her attention*

...were damn good. Mmm, tasty waffles. All the more tasty because they were stolen.

THAT'S RIGHT KIDS! STEALING MAKES EVERYTHING TASTE BETTER! LIFE IS MORE FUN!
*stabs Longton repeatedly in the face*

*stabs Longton repeatedly in the face*
*stabs momotonous* How could you?

...were damn good. Mmm, tasty waffles. All the more tasty because they were stolen.

THAT'S RIGHT KIDS! STEALING MAKES EVERYTHING TASTE BETTER! LIFE IS MORE FUN!
*stabs Longton repeatedly in the face*
*changes the speech slightly*

...BUT STABBING TRIBES IN THE FACE IS DEFINITELY WRONG, AND YOU WILL GO TO HULL FOR THAT!!!!!!!!!!

*stabs monotonous...everywhere*

*pushes her hair back to see her face* I think if you keep this up the chalk will transform shortly

*hisses happily at her attention*

Transform into what? Ooooohhh, some kind of paste and we can do finger painting... Good idea!
*she licks the chalk again and puts in her mouth, rubbing it with her tongue*

*she licks the chalk again and puts in her mouth, rubbing it with her tongue*
*is aroused* :p

*pours some shampoo in his hand and starts massaging Peech's head*

Transform into what? Ooooohhh, some kind of paste and we can do finger painting... Good idea!
*she licks the chalk again and puts in her mouth, rubbing it with her tongue*

let's use the green one too!

*changes the speech slightly*

...BUT STABBING TRIBES IN THE FACE IS DEFINITELY WRONG, AND YOU WILL GO TO HULL FOR THAT!!!!!!!!!!

*stabs monotonous...everywhere*

Am I going to have to resurrect you... AGAIN???!!!!!

Am I going to have to resurrect you... AGAIN???!!!!!
You know you love making me rise...


...from the dead. Now with rigor mortis! :eek:

let's use the green one too!

isn't that what we are using? maybe it's more of a turquoise...
*pulls it in and out*

*stabs Longton repeatedly in the face*


*hops out of the shower momentarily, leaving a trail of water on the castle floor. Stands there between Tribes and Mono......dripping wet and naked....and shields Tribes from the blade*

Do NOT harm him or I will see that you meet the tip of my saber. Now go make me some waffles because I am going to be starving after this shower...


*runs back to shower as LP stands there with a bar of soap in one hand and a kiwi in the other*

sorry...where were we?

You know you love making me rise...


...from the dead. Now with rigor mortis! :eek:

Well, it was fun... and the Kiss of Life wasn't bad either...

Well, it was fun... and the Kiss of Life wasn't bad either...
Using tongues to stimulate breathing was a master stroke, I felt...

ooc *sigh* must go test my motherboard to see if I fried it... see you in about an 60min.

*hops out of the shower momentarily, leaving a trail of water on the castle floor. Stands there between Tribes and Mono......dripping wet and naked....and shields Tribes from the blade*

Do NOT harm him or I will see that you meet the tip of my saber. Now go make me some waffles because I am going to be starving after this shower...


*runs back to shower as LP stands there with a bar of soap in one hand and a kiwi in the other*

sorry...where were we?
I was just.... playing

*runs his soapfilled hand over every square inch, following the natural curves of her body, tickling with his fingertips*

*puts a waffle down his pants, gives it a rub*

*offers it to monotonous*

You wanna waffle?

I was just.... playing

*runs his soapfilled hand over every square inch, following the natural curves of her body, tickling with his fingertips*


*takes his face in her hands and pulls his body to hers.....kissing him deeply as the water flows over them both like a soft sheer blanket*

*breaks the kiss momentarily*....you want some waffles after this ? *continues kissing*

you know , we should go slay something soon before we run out of hot water

*cooks some waffles on the basis that food is the best way to a man's heart, and women aren't all that different (except for the good parts)*

*cooks waffles that spell out "Peech rocks the Reject Royal castle*

*wonders aimlessly looking for pesants to smite*

*takes his face in her hnnds and pulls his body to hers.....kissing him deeply as the water flows over them both like a soft sheer blanket*

*breaks the kiss momentarily*....you want some waffles after this ? *continues kissing*
*nods while kissing eagerly*

*brushes away strands of hair that get caught in the kiss by the flowing water*

*cooks some waffles on the basis that food is the best way to a man's heart, and women aren't all that different (except for the good parts)*

*cooks waffles that spell out "Peech rocks the Reject Royal castle*

awww.....

you are correct my sandwich, jam, peach loving castlemate......women love food too.
*eyeballs waffles*
Dee-lish-ish!

Brings back all manner of delicious toppings for the waffles. These help any?

awww.....

you are correct my sandwich, jam, peach loving castlemate......women love food too.
*eyeballs waffles*
Dee-lish-ish!
Hey Peech! You want peasant with those waffles? I got boiled, fried, fricaseèd, grilled, flame frilled, roasted (now with a peach in the mouth), flambeèd, raw, salted, microwaved (tastes like microwave burritos!), chilled, frozen, still alive, diced, and a whole list of separate body parts as hors-d'euvres (sp for any of that?).

*nods while kissing eagerly*

*brushes away strands of hair that get caught in the kiss by the flowing water*


*turns water off and takes LP by the hand, leading him into the bedroom*


ok we have to go eat those waffles *dries him off with her tongue*


puts on assless chaps and eyepatch pasties. You know.....you wouldnt look half bad in this outfit

Hey Peech! You want peasant with those waffles? I got boiled, fried, fricaseèd, grilled, flame frilled, roasted (now with a peach in the mouth), flambeèd, raw, salted, microwaved (tastes like microwave burritos!), chilled, frozen, still alive, diced, and a whole list of separate body parts as hors-d'euvres (sp for any of that?).


*eyes wide while drooling*

how bought breast of roasted peasant girl with a nice Burgandy glaze....*licks lips*

*turns water off and takes LP by the hand, leading him into the bedroom*


ok we have to go eat those waffles *dries him off with her tongue*


puts on assless chaps and eyepatch pasties. You know.....you wouldnt look half bad in this outfit
*puts an effort into sweating so Peech has to spend a little more time licking, while drying off Peech with his hair*

But I want to look all bad :(

*squats by food in kilt wondering if its possible to decently cover oneself while in a kilt*
can i get a waffle with fried peasant on it?

*squats by food in kilt wondering if its possible to decently cover oneself while in a kilt*
can i get a waffle with fried peasant on it?
*drags a frying peasant out of a giant frying pan*

*inspects*

Sorry dude, they aren't done. See, he's still screaming. Or do you like it rare?

*puts an effort into sweating so Peech has to spend a little more time licking, while drying off Peech with his hair*

But I want to look all bad :(


ok then wear the bandana and look all piratey/bikerish.....and those combat boots too.

ok then wear the bandana and look all piratey/bikerish.....and those combat boots too.
*ties bandana around his head*

Errr..... where should I wear the boots? :confused:

*ties bandana around his head*

Errr..... where should I wear the boots? :confused:
On your hands.

On your hands.
But then I can't eat a waffle :(

But then I can't eat a waffle :(
At last, my evil plan has been put forth! With you unable to eat the waffles, I can lure you away from the crowd by waving a waffle just in front of your nose. Then, I push you into the pit of eternal damnation and cold meals!!!

That's right, I kick the disabled when they are down.

I also steal candy from babies!!!! THE TRUE MEANING OF EVIL!

*drags a frying peasant out of a giant frying pan*

*inspects*

Sorry dude, they aren't done. See, he's still screaming. Or do you like it rare?

hmm ill try it rare today, if you don't mind
its fun to have your food scream :D

hmm ill try it rare today, if you don't mind
its fun to have your food scream :D
OK, now we're (no longer) cooking!

*flips peasant out of the pan and onto a waffle, handing it to Choqulya in one slick movement*

*watches Choq prod the dying peasant, cracking the seared skin*

Hey, don't play with your food!