NationStates Jolt Archive

Congratulations! You are now concidered holy.
brilliant!
*levitates*

"Peechland......the other white meat"

*hopes they have that commercial internationally*

*drools at the thought of going to the supermarket*

*drools at the thought of going to the supermarket*
*on intercom*

Goddess, please give me a hand in ail (sp?) 69

*on intercom*

Goddess, please give me a hand in ail (sp?) 69

*in a flash, she is now dressed in a supermarket overcoat, much to small*

Is there a spill? I can clean that up *starts to lick*

*sits in the produce section *

*on intercom*

Goddess, please give me a hand in ail (sp?) 69

btw aisle

*in a flash, she is now dressed in a supermarket overcoat, much to small*

Is there a spill? I can clean that up *starts to lick*
*watches Goddess bent over in her too small outfit*

Oooh..... now there's a spill here too

btw aisle
I thought there was an e at the end, but it lookes stupid with only the l

*sits in the produce section *

Oh, and we have peaches all over the floor in the produce section...
*she goes to the peache and picks them up firmly. One is so ripe, it bursts and the juices flow on her hands, she starts to lick*


Goddess I love to lick

*watches Goddess bent over in her too small outfit*

Oooh..... now there's a spill here too

I'll be right with you sir. I just have to finish up the peaches, first.

ooc. sorry just testing something.... no updates... *g'ntie*!

I'll be right with you sir. I just have to finish up the peaches, first.
Sorry that I left you all alone slurping up peachjuice. I had a train to catch

*lights up a sigarette, starts reading the paper*

*lights up a sigarette, starts reading the paper*

Can I have a drag of that?

Can I have a drag of that?
*hands over the transvestite section*

*hands over the transvestite section*


lol
*she takes his cigarette and takes a long drag, gives it back and reads the transvestite section*
oooohhhh the Black & Blue Ball... My gay friend always promises he'll take me, but he never does...

lol
*she takes his cigarette and takes a long drag, gives it back and reads the transvestite section*
oooohhhh the Black & Blue Ball... My gay friend always promises he'll take me, but he never does...
*takes a last drag and puts the sigarette out on a random peasant*

Ooh look. My stock of Sex Toy Inc. rose again.

*takes a last drag and puts the sigarette out on a random peasant*

Ooh look. My stock of Sex Toy Inc. rose again.

You've got stocks? Did you invest in Miss Divine's Sexy Secret Chocolate Sauce. It's a start-up but I have complete confidence in it. I even bought the company.

*comes strolling around the corner, whistling dixie rubbing at the cuts on his chest, heads towards his new toy*

Peechtree & Associates are up 150 points. ......must be cause the CEO threatens her investors and their scrotums


*takes the sports section and plots the next kidnapping of the local football team*

You've got stocks? Did you invest in Miss Divine's Sexy Secret Chocolate Sauce. It's a start-up but I have complete confidence in it. I even bought the company.
I was supposed to buy stockings, but those damn fools sent me home with the wrong thing. Fecking students.

Miss Divine's Sexy Secret Chocolate Sauce, eh? I'll look into it.
*takes of the cap*
Dark in there....
*tilts the bottle up*
Wait.... I see something.....It's coming closer......... AAAAAH MY EYE!

Peechtree & Associates are up 150 points. ......must be cause the CEO threatens her investors and their scrotums


*takes the sports section and plots the next kidnapping of the local football team*

Could I have the arts section?
*turns to Peeches*
you really kidnap them? Do they ever make it back home?

*points at several female peasants and directs them over to his guillotine with a grin*

*turns to Peeches*
you really kidnap them? Do they ever make it back home?

*looks under her bed, in her closet, in the dungeon*

nope.

*looks under her bed, in her closet, in the dungeon*

nope.
*whistles innocently while wiping chocolate sauce out of his eye*

I was supposed to buy stockings, but those damn fools sent me home with the wrong thing. Fecking students.

Miss Divine's Sexy Secret Chocolate Sauce, eh? I'll look into it.
*takes of the cap*
Dark in there....
*tilts the bottle up*
Wait.... I see something.....It's coming closer......... AAAAAH MY EYE!

lol
Oh goddess, i can't in good conscience even respond to that.

*whistles innocently while wiping chocolate sauce out of his eye*


*whistles in tune with LP while wiping chocolate sauce off of her lips*

*looks under her bed, in her closet, in the dungeon*

nope.

*eyes twinkle with glee*
Really.... how about giving me pointers. I think there are a few males out there I'd like to get rid of...

*straps on his mask and whips out his hammer* Goddess, more lessons?

With all the chocolate I've been spreading around *eyes LP and Peeches*, I think I'm spent. *drops on her pile of tassled pillows*

You? Spent?

You're like the chocolate horn of plenty.... except for the horn, but with......... something else

*straps on his mask and whips out his hammer* Goddess, more lessons?

*she raises her head from pillows and swoons*

(can you swoon if you're not up?)

(can you swoon if you're not up?)
In the kazoo you can :p

*eyes twinkle with glee*
Really.... how about giving me pointers. I think there are a few males out there I'd like to get rid of...


The trick is to seduce them first, and tell them that I'm into freaky, weird, torturous, gang banging, group sex.....(you know....I'm just honest with them).


Then they follow me back here and I stash them away for later use. Or in the case of the arrogant quarterbacks.......saber practice.

*waves his hammer* I was thinking of naming it Carlisle. I thought Thor was way too cliched.

*grabs a peasant girl roughly by the neck and forces her head into place*

The trick is to seduce them first, and tell them that I'm into freaky, weird, torturous, gang banging, group sex.....(you know....I'm just honest with them).


Then they follow me back here and I stash them away for later use. Or in the case of the arrogant quarterbacks.......saber practice.
oh AMERICAN football :rolleyes:

Well they ARE better, because there's more guys

oh AMERICAN football :rolleyes:

Well they ARE better, because there's more guys

I will take a Rugby player any day of the week over an American football player...

where is our castle anyway? What country? What town? Maybe the American football team was here visiting on spring break? *improvises*

OOC: I would like to point out that Peeches didn't make any posts for 3 hours until I came in "whistling dixie"
Coincidence? The dixie part, not me entering, I mean.

The trick is to seduce them first, and tell them that I'm into freaky, weird, torturous, gang banging, group sex.....(you know....I'm just honest with them).


Then they follow me back here and I stash them away for later use. Or in the case of the arrogant quarterbacks.......saber practice.

*recovers from her swoon and looks at Peeches*
The ones I'm thinking about are definitely battleaxe fodder. *evil grin*

But a few extras, just for pleasure... or the times i'm left chained to the rack by myself...

@Suk
*waves*
Proceed

I will take a Rugby player any day of the week over an American football player...
Or both...... mmmmm ..... both
where is our castle anyway? What country? What town? Maybe the American football team was here visiting on spring break? *improvises*
In the kazoo

@Suk
*waves*
Proceed
*grins at Goddess and gives the peasant a goodbye wack on the ass with Carlisle*
Shhhhhhhh-ka-CHUNK!
*Her head rolls off to stop at the feet of the next peasant, her eyes wide with fright*

*lights up another sigarette and goes to sleep on the fireplace*

OOC: I would like to point out that Peeches didn't make any posts for 3 hours until I came in "whistling dixie"
Coincidence? The dixie part, not me entering, I mean.


ooc: you wish ;)

Ive been cybering for the last 3 hours and my partner had to take a break cause his carpal tunnel was acting up......so I came here. Pure coincidence.


No seriously, I had to do some work and I'm not even finished and I need some prodding from someone to get me back to work. Any good influences in here? (yeah right)

ooc: you wish ;)

Oh, I would never flatter myself on that account. And if you're asking for my encouragement, it's not going to happen. I've been delinquent here at work since I started writing. I haven't studied once. I've started having to take my work home with me.

ooc: you wish ;)

Ive been cybering for the last 3 hours and my partner had to take a break cause his carpal tunnel was acting up......so I came here. Pure coincidence.


No seriously, I had to do some work and I'm not even finished and I need some prodding from someone to get me back to work. Any good influences in here? (yeah right)

*she goes to Peeche and starts nibbling on her lower lip*
you really should go, my lover...

*nibbles on peeches upper lip*

Oh, I would never flatter myself on that account. And if you're asking for my encouragement, it's not going to happen. I've been delinquent here at work since I started writing. I haven't studied once. I've started having to take my work home with me.


lol....we are all kazoo addicts....I wonder if theres a 12 step program.

lol....we are all kazoo addicts....I wonder if theres a 12 step program.
Step 1: Acknowledge you have a problem...what were we talking about again? *slays something*

*she goes to Peeche and starts nibbling on her lower lip*
you really should go, my lover...


*jolts of electricity shoot through her body*......I.....uh....wha.....*starts french kissing Goddess so passionately that both of the women's curls go straight*

*nibbles on peeches upper lip*


youre so.........kinky. *drools*

*jolts of electricity shoot through her body*......I.....uh....wha.....*starts french kissing Goddess so passionately that both of the women's curls go straight*


*she look at her hair*
Well, that's a lot easier than doing it the other way. And more peechy
*licks her lips for Peeches saliva*

*she look at her hair*
Well, that's a lot easier than doing it the other way. And more peechy
*licks her lips for Peeches saliva*
*stops in the middle of pushing the decapitated peasantess off the guillotine to watch, his hammer laying hard against his pants, his foot planted on her ass*

*she look at her hair*
Well, that's a lot easier than doing it the other way. And more peechy
*licks her lips for Peeches saliva*


*forgets all about work.....cant even remember where she works or who she works for due to Goddess's powerful seduction*

*Lays her down on her tasseled pillows and begins worshipping her in ways beyond Goddess's wildest imagination...*


I shall take my time, so as to devote as much time as possible- to every inch of your body...*slowly descends*

*forgets all about work.....cant even remember where she works or who she works for due to Goddess's powerful seduction*

*Lays her down on her tasseled pillows and begins worshipping her in ways beyond Goddess's wildest imagination...*


I shall take my time, so as to devote as much time as possible- to every inch of your body...*slowly descends*

*gasps... and melts*


ooc I have a very wild imagination when it comes to worshipping...

*gasps... and melts*


ooc I have a very wild imagination when it comes to worshipping...


Due to our apparent oral fixation....I'm assuming we share a very similar imagination on *that*......isnt it wonderful???

*with a grin goes back to work, pushing the peasant off and calling the next one* No, not your head, I want to see how this thing works on arms...

unfortunately...I have got to drag myself away (kicking and screaming)from my yummy chocolate delight and do some work. Back in a bit


sigh...

unfortunately...I have got to drag myself away (kicking and screaming)from my yummy chocolate delight and do some work. Back in a bit
sigh...
Yeah, that's a pity... :D

Yeah, that's a pity... :D

@ Peeches
Be here later too *blows a kiss*

@ Suk
*she turns on her tummy to watch the executions*
So?
*eyelashes fluttering*

*she turns on her tummy to watch the executions*
So?
*eyelashes fluttering*
*looks momentarily flustered at the Goddess's attention, then his chest puffs up* Yes, of course, My Goddess.
*the girl tries to jerk her arm out, by he puts his knee to her neck holding her in place*
Shhhhhhhhh-ka-CHUNK!!!

AHHHHHHHH!!!! *blood starts to spray*

*looks momentarily flustered at the Goddess's attention, then his chest puffs up* Yes, of course, My Goddess.
*the girl tries to jerk her arm out, by he puts his knee to her neck holding her in place*
Shhhhhhhhh-ka-CHUNK!!!

AHHHHHHHH!!!! *blood starts to spray*

Do you mind getting me some of that blood? It might prove useful in a potion or two.

Do you mind getting me some of that blood? It might prove useful in a potion or two.
Gladly, My Goddess.
*picks up the still twitching arm and makes the hand cup. Collects blood in it* You two, you heard her! Get over her and collect some blood!
*two peasant girls collect blood in their outstretched, cupped hands as they try in vain to keep the spray out of their faces*
*He takes the arm to the Goddess and puts the hand up to her lips* For inspiration, Goddess.

Gladly, My Goddess.
*picks up the still twitching arm and makes the hand cup. Collects blood in it* You two, you heard her! Get over her and collect some blood!
*two peasant girls collect blood in their outstretched, cupped hands as they try in vain to keep the spray out of their faces*
*He takes the arm to the Goddess and puts the hand up to her lips* For inspiration, Goddess.


*she licks, looking him in the eyes, very direct, very... invading look*

nigga, i'm bigga than you so whatchu gonna do whatchu gonna do

*she licks, looking him in the eyes, very direct, very... invading look*
*He looks into her eyes a moment, then falls under her spell. He spills the rest of the blood onto her mouth and then kisses her, smearing it all over her face. He scratches his chest with his fingers, causing the wounds to reopen raises himself up to smear his blood on her, carressing her face* I must depart, My Goddess. With your leave of course.

*He looks into her eyes a moment, then falls under her spell. He spills the rest of the blood onto her mouth and then kisses her, smearing it all over her face. He scratches his chest with his fingers, causing the wounds to reopen raises himself up to smear his blood on her, carressing her face* I must depart, My Goddess. With your leave of course.


*she wipes her mouth, licks his wounds one last time to promote healing, and nods*

nigga, i'm bigga than you so whatchu gonna do whatchu gonna do


If you have to ask, you really havent been paying attention now have you?

*slays Tri Com*



*goes back to work sulking*

I just had to peek in is all......

Didn't know he had a 22
I grabbed his pockets and then I heard six caps
I fell to the ground wit blood on my hands
I didn't understand
How a nigga so young could bust a cap
I used to be the same way back
I guess that's what I get (for what)
For trying to jack the little homies for they grip

If you have to ask, you really havent been paying attention now have you?

*slays Tri Com*



*goes back to work sulking*

I just had to peek in is all......

ooc peek in later. back on line in a few hours. later love

*waves*

HELP! I'M TRAPPED IN REAL LIFE!! SOMEONE SAVE ME!!

*takes hands out of pockets, waves again*

THIS IS THE BOARD MEETING FROM HELL!

*realizes Boss is watching him as he types this in real life*

Uh-oh.

*takes hands out of pockets, types again*

*falls off the dinnertable*

Auch

*A fireball streaks across the sky, landing just a few yards away*

*the fireball turns out to be gene*

*gets up out of the fetal position, dusts himself off*

greetings all! :D

*Master S. carries me out into one of the courtyards to check on the peasants we collected over night... Again mixing in a couple royals... all are naked, so everyone can play "Guess the Royal" again! hmm... I wonder how they'll get the royal to confess? * evil laugh * Yes Master S., they will be a good offering and nice pile of playthings for everyone! *Master S. sets me down, as I am not in my usual leather... going on almost 4 days w/no sleep, I chose to wear a lovely black lace gown, w/a nice high slit up the left side and low v-cut neckline, with flowing sleeves and a lace dragon down the left sleeve over to the very low cut back... Leather can get a bit confining after a long while.... (snickers). I point out 3 of the peasants to bring back to THAT DUNGEON, where I will direct and watch Master S.'s expertise... their pain... my pleasure... (sly smile)... Master S. chooses the three and unlocks their shackles and shackles them together by their collars leaving them unblindfolded. All the while, I am enjoying their begging and pleading and screaming. They have heard the rumors... about THAT DUNGEON, and how no one who is taken there unblindfolded ever returns... * Master S., I am looking forward to watching you play tonight! Please bring that man... the one on the left over there... *Master S. brings him over and slams his neck to my mouth while I drink hungrily* Unfortunately, this one's history... You'll have two playmates tonight Master S. *He bows and graciously thanks his Mistress, drags the two screaming peasants by their chains behind him on the floor, while holding me in one arm... I intend to enjoy the show... I whisper to Master S. "I hope they enjoy the playmates I left for them... "Guess the Royals" is ALWAYS so much fun! (giggles) Enjoying the screams, I snap them w/a wet bloody whip... (grins)...* And now we shall take our leave...

ooc: There is a rumor that many of the offerings are Jolt personnel.... ;)

OOC. Yes, I really AM taking my 3-4 week leave! It's the insomnia for the mo...

IC. *Master S. holds the chains of our pets and turns to give me a hot, deep kiss that takes my breath away... yes... this will be a good day. I seem to be fearing daybreak... We seem to be venturing outside our special areas only at night... Wondering... as the dead peasant's blood is passed from my mouth to Master H.'s, but both of us seeming to want to swallow it desperately... * Tonight we enjoy ourselves Master S. *We have a dungeon full of slaves, peasants, and some royals... enough blood to keep us sustained for weeks. I excitedly look forward to watching Master S. with the two new toys, and the fun the two of us will have after... SHIVERS thinking about it... And we're off, chains clanking on the stairs and screams echoing thru the castle...*

Mistress Hype would like all of you to pay "special attention" to the Joltwonks in the collection of pets we left for you! ;)

*grabs a gallon of choc milk as hype does her naughty things*

*chugs the gallon of chocolate milk*

ooc: LAST POST PRIOR TO HIATUS!

ic: All these peasants (and royalty) are just going to die of starvation? Does no one want to take advantage of these gifts? Well, it didn't take much to kidnap them, but I hate rotting corpses. I hope someone cleans them up before we get back... *leaves in a mist of ethereal fog under the door leaving behind nothing but the sweet scent of blended oriental flowers*

*checks watch*

well. i'm outa here.

later all!

*teleports out*

*turns up*

Heh. 56 pages. I have been away too long...

*slays peasant*

*Appears briefly and disappears again, leaving behind a sign which reads: "All employees must greet each other as pirates, 'yar' or 'ahoy' are both acceptable - The MGT"*

*Appears briefly and disappears again, leaving behind a sign which reads: "All employees must greet each other as pirates, 'yar' or 'ahoy' are both acceptable - The MGT"*
*looks confuddled and perplexed - mainly because he likes those words*

Eh?

*Strides in with a bright red parrot on his shoulder*

Ahoy!

Hey guys, I cant stay but wanted to drop in , slay a few peasants and say hi. Hi Tribes...theres some love notes from me somewhere in this thread to you. ;)

Welcome to the Kazoo "Our Earth".....another pirate? YUM! *carves "Peech welcomed me to the Kazoo" on his forehead to show her affection*

OK kids...keep it clean (sorta) and I'll see you later.

Hargh!

LP- i think another pirate has joined us.......

LP- i think another pirate has joined us.......
Huzzah!


OOC: I'm off again. Dinner!

*looks confuddled and perplexed - mainly because he likes those words*

Eh?

ooc. Yeah I'm still kicking around... 4 days of insomnia... (Maybe I'll beat my record... 16 days no sleep! :p )

IC: Is Avast ye scurvy scalawags acceptable????

Greetings matey, how are the young scalliwags doing today. For I be, John Jacob Jackerhiemer-Smith. I've traveled the seven 7 burly seas, to find a fine good looking lass. I am gonna rope tie you up to the centre mast and take to my disarted haunted Island. ARRRR!

Greetings matey, how are the young scalliwags doing today. For I be, John Jacob Jackerhiemer-Smith. I've traveled the seven 7 burly seas, to find a fine good looking lass. I am gonna rope tie you up to the centre mast and take to my disarted haunted Island. ARRRR!


Avast ye scurvy scalawags! So I've seen! I'd be happy to, but I must take my leave!

If you were to tie me, Mistress Hype, to the mast, it would only be w/my permission... of course it sounds like fun... And Master Sadisto would oversee everything... He is my sub... ;)

Garr. Yarr. Arr. Generic pirate noise. Et cetera. :rolleyes:

*sitting on the window sill, wrapped in her peasant skin duvet, she looks at the guillotine with affection, then turns her head and continues to write furiously in her diary.*

*Appears once more and disappears leaving behind a sign which reads: "You are all officially dupes of the MGT, congratulations - The MGT"*

*drops in via tornado*

greetings all!

*Appears once more and disappears leaving behind a sign which reads: "You are all officially dupes of the MGT, congratulations - The MGT"*

*sighs, points at the sign and it burst into flames and she resumes her writing.*

*she writes of Carlyle Hammers and planks
and poles and much waxing,
secret sauces and the varying states of fluffling,
of assless chaps and hungry licking;
of chocolate tease and much whipping...*

Well, it's certainly quiet tonight. :/

*after writing and satisfying her darkest pleasures, she turns her attention to the often overlooked subject of... the tribute.*

*after writing and satisfying her darkest pleasures, she turns her attention to the often overlooked subject of... the tribute.*
*strolls in naked, covered in mud* Goddess, good morning!

*strolls in naked, covered in mud* Goddess, good morning!

*she looks up, biting her lip*
oooohhhh, mud!

*she looks up, biting her lip*
oooohhhh, mud!
*looks down and grins* Oh, I forgot about that. I was mudwrestling peasant girls all night. I won. ;)

*looks down and grins* Oh, I forgot about that. I was mudwrestling peasant girls all night. I won. ;)

*lower lips trembles*
Mud wrestling? *shivers*

*lower lips trembles*
Mud wrestling? *shivers*
Yep. There's a mud pit out back. It's even heated from a spring. It's all warm and silky and smooth.

*before he is even finished, she is up and running to the mud pit.*
I have been wanting to do this for sooo long...
*she drops top to her knees and and then just falls on her back, making mud angels*

*before he is even finished, she is up and running to the mud pit.*
I have been wanting to do this for sooo long...
*she drops top to her knees and and then just falls on her back, making mud angels*
*watches Goddess with a little smile*
*reaches under the surface and grabs a peasant hand and drags the girl out to toss her on shore*
Mind the big lumps. :D

*chugs a few gallons of chocolate milk while the two lover-birds play in the mud*

*slips into the mud, pushing aside bodies*

*jumps around in circles giggling insanely and evilly and staring at TCG*

*she turns on her stomach and just slides aournd, feeling the wetness, and smoothness*

*she turns on her stomach and just slides aournd, feeling the wetness, and smoothness*
*watches the mud slipping and sliding around the Goddess's body.* You deserve to be worshipped like that, My Goddess.

*she looks up at him, eyes mischievious*
Like what? Covered in mud or in ecstacy?

*she looks up at him, eyes mischievious*
Like what? Covered in mud or in ecstacy?
*watches the mud encircling her, rubbing her and covering her* Like the mud, My Goddess. It completely covers your skin and surrounds you. Us mere mortals can't even begin to worship you like that.

*watches the mud encircling her, rubbing her and covering her* Like the mud, My Goddess. It completely covers your skin and surrounds you. Us mere mortals can't even begin to worship you like that.

*looks at him wide-eyed, puts some mud on her blushing cheeks*
Stop it! We don't get teary eyed here!. We'll both be on the rack for days...

*looks at him wide-eyed, puts some mud on her blushing cheeks*
Stop it! We don't get teary eyed here!. We'll both be on the rack for days...
If you want the rack, you're going to have to wait until later. I have things to do today.

*Provides a meteor shower for Suklaa and TCG to view at their pleasure*

*Provides a meteor shower for Suklaa and TCG to view at their pleasure*
Now I have to make a wish. *closes his eyes, a smirk on his face*

Okay, it's back to the grind for me. *pulls himself out of the pit, mud sliding down his naked body* I will talk to you later, Goddess.

*checks watch*

later all!

*teleports out*

*turns up, still writing his latest essay*

*doesn't look up, and so does no see a complete absence of people*

*sits at the bar, furiously writing essay*

*jumps around in circles giggling insanely and evilly and staring at TCG*
*stops, and stares even more intensely while a fapping noise of unknown nature is heard*

*stops, and stares even more intensely while a fapping noise of unknown nature is heard*

*she gets out of the mud pit, dripping, enjoying the softness and texture next to her skin. She walks to the main chamber and looks around*

*she gets out of the mud pit, dripping, enjoying the softness and texture next to her skin. She walks to the main chamber and looks around*
*looks up briefly, looking slightly dishevelled and unshaven due to time spent this weekend constantly working*

*mutters* M..morn...

..oh wait...

..evening. Yes, it is evening, isn't it...

*goes back to work*

*she gets out of the mud pit, dripping, enjoying the softness and texture next to her skin. She walks to the main chamber and looks around*
*quickly runs away to his evil (and holy) lair; fapping noises following in his wake, and hides under a pile of fluff*

*quickly runs away to his evil (and holy) lair; fapping noises following in his wake, and hides under a pile of fluff*
*wishes DIF would stop making fapping noises - it's putting him off his work*

*quickly runs away to his evil (and holy) lair; fapping noises following in his wake, and hides under a pile of fluff*


*she stands still, looking at DIF, then bursts out laughing, so much so she holds her sides and tears are rolling down her face.*

*she stands still, looking at DIF, then bursts out laughing, so much so she holds her sides and tears are rolling down her face.*

Drinks CG's tears.
Water...water everywhere, yummy nutritional drink.

*the laughter has subsided but she sometimes still giggles. she took so much time laughing the mud is now dry and flakey. She pats Planners on the head and goes to the pool. Like a knife, she slices the waters without making much of a ripple or a splash. and she swims to wash off the dried mud.*

*nails small stuff to little stuff to make more stuff, that makes bigger stuff. Rearranges furniture*

*wakes up to find Master S still chained up*

"mmmmmmmmmm"

What?

"MMMMM MNMNNNMMMM*

WHAT?!?

*she wakes. she is lying beside the pool, naked and cold.*
What' hap...
*she remembers the ecstacy of the mud on her skin...*

*shrugs and unchains Master S*

Bloody peasants.

*pats him on the ass*

Now go on and play with the horseys.

*she finally gets and and makes for the nearest peasant and sends her in search of food. she then proceeds to the main room and drops on a pile of tassled pillows*

Anyone call for food?

Anyone call for food?
*she opens her eyes and a slowly wicked smile srpeads on her lips while she raises her right hand*

*she opens her eyes and a slowly wicked smile srpeads on her lips while she raises her right hand*
*takes out box of fruit and a can of whipped cream*

Strawberry? Peach? Kiwi? Watermelon?

*takes out box of fruit and a can of whipped cream*

Strawberry? Peach? Kiwi? Watermelon?
*her eyes light up*
You know I am partial to peaches...
*takes the can of whipped cream and puts some on her outstretched tongue*

*her eyes light up*
You know I am partial to peaches...
*takes the can of whipped cream and puts some on her outstretched tongue*
*bites off a chunk and puts in on Goddess' tongue*

This is strange.

And also almost RPing, but with tiny posts instead of RAWR>

This is strange.

And also almost RPing, but with tiny posts instead of RAWR>
It is. Strange and RPing

*bites off a chunk and puts in on Goddess' tongue*

*takes the piece and licks Lp's fingers*
That's juicy... just the way i like it...

*takes the piece and licks Lp's fingers*
That's juicy... just the way i like it...
*puts a second piece on his tongue*

Owen wibe

*puts a second piece on his tongue*

Owen wibe

lol
*she puts her head under your fingers and opens wide, her tongue coming up to retrieve the tender morsels of peach and whipped cream... had you try to put one piece on her tongue, she bites your fingers*

lol
*she puts her head under your fingers and opens wide, her tongue coming up to retrieve the tender morsels of peach and whipped cream... had you try to put one piece on her tongue, she bites your fingers*
Auch!

*slaps Goddess' right buttock*

Don't be greedy

Auch!

*slaps Goddess' right buttock*

Don't be greedy

*evil toothy grin*


ooc: but LP, we have no one to balance the sexual innuendo with violence... I don't like to use my battleaxe...

*evil toothy grin*


ooc: but LP, we have no one to balance the sexual innuendo with violence... I don't like to use my battleaxe...
Oooh. You like it rough, do you?

You can use my "battleaxe"

*thinks about trading in her saber for a battleaxe*

how cute....someone up there said we/this is strange.....excellent.

*thinks about trading in her saber for a battleaxe*

how cute....someone up there said we/this is strange.....excellent.
I saved him for you ;)

I saved him for you ;)


good....cause I need a snack

good....cause I need a snack
Here noobie noobie noobie....


Where did he go?

*eyes Peech suspiciously*

*backs away*

Here noobie noobie noobie....


Where did he go?

*eyes Peech suspiciously*

*backs away*

you know I'd never snack on you.....well, not technically.

Although I once had a pirate lollipop......oh wait...thats different.

you know I'd never snack on you.....well, not technically.

Although I once had a pirate lollipop......oh wait...thats different.
How so?

How so?

Well when I have a pirate snack.....I dont actually chew him up.......or swallow. ;)

And what do we owe this great visit from you Luscious Laximous?

ooc Damn! I hate it when works gets in the way of play... ;)


*she suddenly starts sobbing for having missed LP's battleaxe, Peeches sweet lips and Lasc hot gilded tongue action*

ooc Damn! I hate it when works gets in the way of play... ;)


Hey lover.....isnt that the truth...thats 2 days in a row for us doing this dreadful work instead of kissing and groping each other. Whats a Peech to do?

Hey lover.....isnt that the truth...thats 2 days in a row for us doing this dreadful work instead of kissing and groping each other. Whats a Peech to do?

*she turns her tear streaked face to her most luscious lover and, still hold the can of whipped cream, draws a line down Peeches spine and licks the cream, sending shivers through both of their bodies, sparking the flam of desire in their eyes.*

*she turns her tear streaked face to her most luscious lover and, still hold the can of whipped cream, draws a line down Peeches spine and licks the cream, sending shivers through both of their bodies, sparking the flam of desire in their eyes.*


with my back arched, and chills running throughout my body...I turn to Goddess and embrace her in a kiss that leaves the sweet taste of whipped cream in my mouth......what a sinful combination of flavors ....Goddess/ fresh sweet cream......taking her face in my hands and kissing her even more deeply now, I cant seem to tear myself away from her soft supple lips.....so for now, I wont.

*shivers his own timbers*

Well when I have a pirate snack.....I dont actually chew him up.......or swallow. ;)
:eek: Thats awful! Don't you love him?

I came all the way from the planet of horny waffle eating Audrey Hepburns for this!!??!?!

Crimminy!

And LP, what are you doing shivering your own timbers when I can shiver them for you? :confused:

And LP, what are you doing shivering your own timbers when I can shiver them for you? :confused:
Force of habit.... sorry.

with my back arched, and chills running throughout my body...I turn to Goddess and embrace her in a kiss that leaves the sweet taste of whipped cream in my mouth......what a sinful combination of flavors ....Goddess/ fresh sweet cream......taking her face in my hands and kissing her even more deeply now, I cant seem to tear myself away from her soft supple lips.....so for now, I wont.

her fresh scent is intoxicating and drives me wild... I pull her in, close, and my hands caress her creamy smooth peach skin, sending waves of warmth and goosebumps all over...

*moans*

:eek: Thats awful! Don't you love him?

I came all the way from the planet of horny waffle eating Audrey Hepburns for this!!??!?!

Crimminy!

And LP, what are you doing shivering your own timbers when I can shiver them for you? :confused:


LOL..


I guess it depends on the snack.....I have been known to swallow snacks once or twice before. I'd like to have one of those waffles you speak of though......

Sadly, I never brought any waffles back - perhaps we can work on the maple syrup aspect of it all until I have created enough batter?

*shivers LP's timber in the meantime*

*shivers Goddess's timbers while watching Lasc shiver LP's timbers......all the while licking maple syrup off of herself*

My timbers are shaking me......make them stop!

My head hurts....

Planners...come heat up my waffle iron.

*while her timbers are shivered...

ooc lol, i have no idea what i'm saying... it just sounds nasty...

ic:...she takes from maple syrup and applies a thin coating to Peeches with a brush*

Sadly, I never brought any waffles back - perhaps we can work on the maple syrup aspect of it all until I have created enough batter?

*shivers LP's timber in the meantime*
TIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIMBEEEEEEEER!

*pokes Lasc's eye*

Oh sorry

TIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIMBEEEEEEEER!

*pokes Lasc's eye*

Oh sorry
*puts patch on his eye*

ARRRGGGHHHH!!!! that hurt...

Planners...come heat up my waffle iron.

okeeee.....dokeeee

Lights a fire in the dungeon....and tosses the iron on top

*dancing*

Burn...burn... baby burn....

*puts patch on his eye*

ARRRGGGHHHH!!!! that hurt...
Sorry man. I just wanted to "pirate" you

*nudge nudge wink wink*

Sorry man. I just wanted to "pirate" you

*nudge nudge wink wink*
*tries to wink back*

ow

This may be permanent... wait a minute... why the hell is there superglue on my eye? It doesnt feel like normal glue... what the hell is going on... :confused:

okeeee.....dokeeee

Lights a fire in the dungeon....and tosses the iron on top

*dancing*

Burn...burn... baby burn....


*pours ice water on her waffle iron*

thats not exactly what i had in mind.......

*tries to wink back*

ow

This may be permanent... wait a minute... why the hell is there superglue on my eye? It doesnt feel like normal glue... what the hell is going on... :confused:


here....lemme get that for you....*licks Lasc's eye*

that tastes......familiar.

here....lemme get that for you....*licks Lasc's eye*

that tastes......familiar.
Hmm... eyeball licking... how... romantic!

I can see now! Its a miracle!

say, you're pretty good at that! Would you like to lick any other balls?

*holds up a medicine ball*

For a person obviously so medically inclined, this ought to do! :)

Hmm... eyeball licking... how... romantic!

I can see now! Its a miracle!

say, you're pretty good at that! Would you like to lick any other balls?

*holds up a medicine ball*

For a person obviously so medically inclined, this ought to do! :)

Oral medications are what I prescribe mostly. *takes off assless chaps and slips into assless scrubs*

Open wide now..........wait. Shouldnt you be saying that to me?

Oral medications are what I prescribe mostly. *takes off assless chaps and slips into assless scrubs*

Open wide now..........wait. Shouldnt you be saying that to me?


*licking the last of the maple syrup from the brush, she calls to her her pen and diary an starts writing about the medical examinations taking place, drawing diagrams for her memoirs*

*licking the last of the maple syrup from the brush, she calls to her her pen and diary an starts writing about the medical examinations taking place, drawing diagrams for her memoirs*


dont forget our therapy session later this evening my Goddess......I'll bring the flavored warming lotion this time.

*makes Peech a white eyepatch too*

*makes Peech a white eyepatch too*


hell yeah.....

can you make me some white pasties too?

dont forget our therapy session later this evening my Goddess......I'll bring the flavored warming lotion this time.

My nights are always open for you, love

*goes back to drawing her sketches*
My, that is an interesting position...

ooc: gotta get some work done - back to random posting in General.

ic: Ok Peech - close your eyes, open wide, and you will get a sweet surprise!

*pulls LP in front of Peech, her mouth now gaping*

Dont look at me like that LP, you know what to do. ;)

ooc: gotta get some work done - back to random posting in General.

ic: Ok Peech - close your eyes, open wide, and you will get a sweet surprise!

*pulls LP in front of Peech, her mouth now gaping*

Dont look at me like that LP, you know what to do. ;)
But it's so different when they don't have beards....

*takes a deep breath*

*licks Peech's tonsils*

But it's so different when they don't have beards....

*takes a deep breath*

*licks Peech's tonsils*


since youre in a licking mood.......

OOC:Gone to do 2 weeks of work in just under 60 minutes.....back in an hour.

since youre in a licking mood.......

OOC:Gone to do 2 weeks of work in just under 60 minutes.....back in an hour.
*tongue strays and starts exploring*

What's this bushy part?

*appears in the doorway after a hard day of Mafia hitman contracts (http://www.gsoftnet.us/MOB/TrenchCoat.JPG)*

Evening all.

*goes to bar, takes a pint of Goliath and goes to a leather armchair*

*tongue strays and starts exploring*

What's this bushy part?
*carefully opens eyes*

Phew. It was just the eyebrow

*carefully opens eyes*

Phew. It was just the eyebrow


pfft......as if :rolleyes:

*appears in the doorway after a hard day of Mafia hitman contracts (http://www.gsoftnet.us/MOB/TrenchCoat.JPG)*

Evening all.

*goes to bar, takes a pint of Goliath and goes to a leather armchair*


*eyeballs the leather armchair*

I could make some hot, new, assless chaps with that material......

pfft......as if :rolleyes:
They weren't.............your......... eyelashes, were they?

*eyeballs the leather armchair*

I could make some hot, new, assless chaps with that material......
*draws up designs for new assless chaps*

*creates a top to go with it*

*makes it all easy to undo* ;)

They weren't.............your......... eyelashes, were they?


If you dont know what it was, then you have no business down there. *smacks LP around a little while*

*draws up designs for new assless chaps*

*creates a top to go with it*

*makes it all easy to undo* ;)


As long as you can manage to gain access.......thats all that matters

If you dont know what it was, then you have no business down there. *smacks LP around a little while*
Pfft. Business. I'm here for pleasure.

*licks a new spot*

As long as you can manage to gain access.......thats all that matters
*rubs out the easy access bra-clasp*

*replaces with small padlock, which can only be opened with my thumbprint*

*removes some more material*

Better?

Pfft. Business. I'm here for pleasure.

*licks a new spot*


wow! Someone finally found it...........


*enjoys*

*rubs out the easy access bra-clasp*

*replaces with small padlock, which can only be opened with my thumbprint*

*removes some more material*

Better?

excellent.......you always impress me.

excellent.......you always impress me.
I try...

wow! Someone finally found it...........


*enjoysOOC: LOL!

IC: *looks where LP is*

Why is he in the fridge? And what is so important that is in there...

wow! Someone finally found it...........


*enjoys*
No one ever did before? It certainly looks like someone scratched it.

*looks up*

Better clip your nails ;)

*licks some more from different angles to clean the wound properly*

I try...

OOC: LOL!

IC: *looks where LP is*

Why is he in the fridge? And what is so important that is in there...


I always keep some spare peeches in there.....just in case.

*she writes furiously and draws and finally, seeing she cannot keep up with all the fun around her, she breaks, and opens up a jar of forbidden secret sauce and starts basting*

I always keep some spare peeches in there.....just in case.
*takes a Peach*

Mmm, so soft and tender...

*juice runs down chin, mainly because he can be such a messy eater*

*she writes furiously and draws and finally, seeing she cannot keep up with all the fun around her, she breaks, and opens up a jar of forbidden secret sauce and starts basting*
Need a hand?

*takes a Peach*

Mmm, so soft and tender...

*juice runs down chin, mainly because he can be such a messy eater*


Need a hand?

I'm always looking for a good handyman...
I need you to apply another coat

[QUOTE=The Tribes Of Longton]*takes a Peach*

Mmm, so soft and tender...

*juice runs down chin, mainly because he can be such a messy eater*

QUOTE]

OOC: Thanks....now I will go to bed with detailed images of you being a "messy eater".......sigh.

I'm always looking for a good handyman...
I need you to apply another coat
*being very good at this (indeed, a master) he begins to baste masterfully ¬_¬*

OOC: Thanks....now I will go to bed with detailed images of you being a "messy eater".......sigh.
OOC: I can also eat peaches whole, although I have to get rid of the stones first (nasty accident, that was)

*being very good at this (indeed, a master) he begins to baste masterfully ¬_¬*


OOC: I can also eat peaches whole, although I have to get rid of the stones first (nasty accident, that was)


Mmmm, yes.... you missed a spot *she turns slightly*

Mmmm, yes.... you missed a spot *she turns slightly*
*striving for perfection, he bastes the area furiously, whilst simultaneously reprimanding himself*

*striving for perfection, he bastes the area furiously, whilst simultaneously reprimanding himself*

*she giggles*
That tickles. Now. I need to be real hot, for the basting to have an effect...
Waht do you think? A bonfire, maybe?

*she giggles*
That tickles. Now. I need to be real hot, for the basting to have an effect...
Waht do you think? A bonfire, maybe?
*starts up the electro-roaster 9000*

If you can call this propane fuelled monster a bonfire...then yes. Definitely.

*gets all hot under the collar. And he's nowhere near the fire*

*starts up the electro-roaster 9000*

If you can call this propane fuelled monster a bonfire...then yes. Definitely.

*gets all hot under the collar. And he's nowhere near the fire*

*she looks at him speculatively*
You seem to be very hot... Would you like to experiment? *eyes fluttering*
*she takes her brush and starts basting Tribes*

*she looks at him speculatively*
You seem to be very hot... Would you like to experiment? *eyes fluttering*
*she takes her brush and starts basting Tribes*
*has to take shirt off*

*since its an old shirt, he rips it off*

*starts smiling*

Greetings all!

*has to take shirt off*

*since its an old shirt, he rips it off*

*starts smiling*


ooc sorry I left you hanging there Tribes, impromptu meeting in my office... with the boss...

Screw it..I'm bored



*slays something then makes a sandwich out of it*

want some pie for after?
*slays something else and warms up the oven*

want some pie for after?
*slays something else and warms up the oven*


peasant pie? *drool*

AAAAAH LET ME OUT!

*kicks against the oven door*

AAAAAH LET ME OUT!

*kicks against the oven door*
not again.... :rolleyes:

AAAAAH LET ME OUT!

*kicks against the oven door*


whooops! sorry bout that......I thought you were a peasant. *brushes ashes out of LPs hair*

whooops! sorry bout that......I thought you were a peasant. *brushes ashes out of LPs hair*
*hacks off a peasants legs*
legless peasants?
*throws peasant into oven, with strawberries*

*coughs up some ashes*

phew.

Well I DID put on my peasant suit.......
*looks at normal clothes*
..... Or did you take drugs again?

*coughs up some ashes*

phew.

Well I DID put on my peasant suit.......
*looks at normal clothes*
..... Or did you take drugs again?


quiet you....

pie's ready
*opens door*

quiet you....
Stop using my favourite phrase you... :p

Stop using my favourite phrase you... :p


quiet you..... ;)

quiet you..... ;)
Quiet y...

*sees where this is going*

*nips it in the bud*

Quiet y...

*sees where this is going*

*nips it in the bud*


lol....and we could keep that up for hours, you and I and our cheesiness.

lol....and we could keep that up for hours, you and I and our cheesiness.
*produces can of moderated cheese whiz - now with 30% less sauciness*

We reject royals and our cheese.... ;)

*produces can of moderated cheese whiz - now with 30% less sauciness*

We reject royals and our cheese.... ;)

ooc:the puns never end...i love it.


*pulls out a pack of crackers from her clevage*

Here.....put some on this.

ooc:the puns never end...i love it.


*pulls out a pack of crackers from her clevage*

Here.....put some on this.
You keep crackers in your cleavage? My God, you are like some divine cracker dispenser! :D

*slaps some cheese on a cracker*

You keep crackers in your cleavage? My God, you are like some divine cracker dispenser! :D

*slaps some cheese on a cracker*


<inserts bad joke about hiding the sausage >

ooc
Every time you come in this thread....I am on my way out. It sucks. *boo/hiss*


bye love....

<inserts bad joke about hiding the sausage >

ooc
Every time you come in this thread....I am on my way out. It sucks. *boo/hiss*


bye love....
*finds the sausage*

Oh look! It was in the same place all along...

...in the freezer ¬_¬

OOC: Bah. I'll have to come online later or earlier. See you soon :)

*A massive, 10 mile long 20 mile wide 1 mile thick triangular space ship descends from the skies*

*Gene teleports down*

Greetings all!

*The ship leaves*

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARGH!
CRAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAP!!
DAAAAMNIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIT!!!

I just punched a hole in my S&M CD NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!

*sobs uncontrollably*

wow, that sucks.
poor tribes :(

And I got a shard of plastic stuck in my knuckle. Oh cruel fate, why dost thou mock me???!

Fucking hell Longton.

And I got a shard of plastic stuck in my knuckle. Oh cruel fate, why dost thou mock me???!
*throws head back in mocking laughter*

*sucks blood out of cut*

Wow, that's pretty deep. And painful. Ow.


Did I mention painful? Ow! I can't type with my left hand. :(

That's what you get for having porn

That's what you get for having porn
No. I get a smack from any girl who sees me with porn. Not in the act of...reading, obviously.

No. I get a smack from any girl who sees me with porn. Not in the act of...reading, obviously.
pfft. You have to show them who's boss

pfft. You have to show them who's boss
You...you mean like, copy the 'article'? :eek:

You...you mean like, copy the 'article'? :eek:
I mean like: smack them in the face if they get out of the kitchen

right-ho people, I'm off home. see you after.

Fare well Odd dude

I mean like: smack them in the face if they get out of the kitchen
*spouts several thousand sexist jokes*

¬_¬ I wouldn't dare, apart from anything. Lots of girls I hang about with are very.....dominating.

*spouts several thousand sexist jokes*

¬_¬ I wouldn't dare, apart from anything. Lots of girls I hang about with are very.....dominating.
Every girl like a good smacking now and then?

Every girl like a good smacking now and then?
Not really...

...maybe in here, but...

...no.

Not really...

...maybe in here, but...

...no.
so you actually punched a hole in your porn CD? :eek:

so you actually punched a hole in your porn CD? :eek:
AAAAAAH! I wondered where the sex reference was coming from. S&M as in Symphony and Metallica. Silly.

My porn cd is in the drawers by my bed :p

Oh and yes, I did just punch a hole in a cd case complete with 2 CDs. The bandage on my hand proves this :(

AAAAAAH! I wondered where the sex reference was coming from. S&M as in Symphony and Metallica. Silly.

My porn cd is in the drawers by my bed :p

Oh and yes, I did just punch a hole in a cd case complete with 2 CDs. The bandage on my hand proves this :(
AAAAH. That explains the confusion.

And you should punch a whole in that one.