NationStates Jolt Archive

Hmm... I say all hopeless cases must be sent to the Hopeless Cases "*special school", rather than lowering the educational standards to meet them.

*military training facility

Excellent idea, sah! After all, our fine tommies would never get anywhere of they were literate, wot!

In the mean I have prepared a division with four infantry, two artillery, and two cavalry regiments to cross the channel and trounce Johny Damn Foreigner! Huzzah!

What ho! The East India Company regrets to announce that tea will be served today with, due to "native problems", only 12 varieties. We apologise profusely.

Well the Vodka-stonian military is in tip-top shape, only problem is I have no airforce

Im nay sure what this classifies as, old chap, but I would like to add the HMS Whiskah to the list, wotwot! Its the size of a bloody island, and as well equipped as an entire naval base! It even has barracks, airfields, command towers, and belowdecks, a place where you can grow tea and other assorted thinggummits to feed and quench the troops!
Huzzah for the British Emparh!
By the by, mates, anyone declare any good wars lately? That bloody German prime minister kneed me in the nads the other day just because I showed up to his party!... or was it a diplomatic conference... anyway i brought whiska, so i dont see the problem! *picks up a cricket bat and whacks the German Prime Minister on the head*

WHAT?! The German PM dared be so insolent to a member of the British Cabinet?! How dare he! Has Fritz not learned from the two largest wars in history that John Bull does not accept insults? I suggest that we declare war upon Germany this very instant, wot! Such foolishness of them to provoke the Emparh... *shakes head sadly*
I shall commission those damned shipyard workers to begin work upon HMS Whiskah at once. Perhaps it shall be created in time for the next war, wot?
I beg to report that work on HMS Victoria is underway. It shall likely be completed by the 31st of October, just in time for that pagan festivity, All Hallows Eve, or Halloween as I believe it is commonly called, wot.
*sips tea*
The weather yesterday was bloody awful here in the Lincolnshire area. Just saying, old bean.

I have taken the liberty of raising a division of infantry to aid the war in Holland, should it be underway. I hope they will prove themselves to be as fine a lot as their training and small numbers allow.

The Rt. Hon. Lord Sir Ilaer, CBE, OBE, MBE, Lord Chancellor of the New British Imperial Party

I say chaps, dreadfully sorry for my absence! I've been held up at a meeting with Her Majesty (gawd bless her) and have been totally unable to fulfil my duties to the party. A thousand apologies!

All the new chaps who have requested to join, welcome, welcome, and above all, welcome, wot! I've added to the list and spoken to Her Majesty about your titles and appointments, wotwot!

Cup of tea, anyone?

What ho chaps!
My military has a grand total of 45.5 million troops, all ready to set sail, hop in a tank, or rush into the cities of our enemys!
Please tell me when we shall be declaring war on the damn foreigners! :D
*drinks whiska*
http://img.epinions.com/images/opti/e8/a6/fddkSpiritsBy_NameAllJack_Daniels_Old_No_7_Tennessee_Sour_Mash_Whiskey-resized200.gif

*Sneaks coffee into EVERYTHING*

*Sneaks coffee into EVERYTHING*

*Shhots coffee sneakers, disposes of impure tea and whiska, invades Free Shepmagans, shouts "Huzzah!", drinks cuppa*

Wot, I am afraid I am only a damn colonist from the Canadian Dominion, huzzah! Please, for the Queen's will, amend my title, showing my damnation.

*pokes dead body of Free shepmagan, Coffee drinker*

okay you damn imperialsts. since you have advertised in other people's threads so often, its time to get revenege:

ENT]Are YOU a spammer at heart? Now you too can be a sexy person!
In the upcoming elections you must Choose sensibly - You must Choose smartly[/INDENT]

You must Vote for the [real] Choose wisely party

Vote CWP - as soon as possible, and more then once.


The [real] Choose wisely party (CWP) is the return of the original Choose Wisely party. none of teh OMG Pogo Stick party nonsense.

Brought to the world by the wonderful Peechland, this ad paid for by the Order of spam.

okay you damn imperialsts. since you have advertised in other people's threads so often, its time to get revenege:

ENT]Are YOU a spammer at heart? Now you too can be a sexy person!
In the upcoming elections you must Choose sensibly - You must Choose smartly[/INDENT]

You must Vote for the [real] Choose wisely party

Vote CWP - as soon as possible, and more then once.


The [real] Choose wisely party (CWP) is the return of the original Choose Wisely party. none of teh OMG Pogo Stick party nonsense.

Brought to the world by the wonderful Peechland, this ad paid for by the Order of spam.

This is an abomination! Has this Polish ingrate forgotten that we went to war against Hitler for his nation?! The New British Imperial Party requires advertising, as it is the best. The Real Choose Wisely Party most certainly does not!
*shoots ingrate Polish person, Swilatia*
And that serves them right!
In any case, his location on his profile is incorrect. The centre of Europe and thus its heart is in reality the Czech Republic, more or less. And anyone who gives me tosh about Britain (and its bloody awful weather and lovely tea) being part of Europe, well, they obviously need to examine the neighbours we'd have if that were the case. Nobody likes the French, wot!

The Rt. Hon. Lord Sir Ilaer, CBE, OBE, MBE, Lord Chancellor of the New British Imperial Party

This is an abomination! Has this Polish ingrate forgotten that we went to war against Hitler for his nation?! The New British Imperial Party requires advertising, as it is the best. The Real Choose Wisely Party most certainly does not!
*shoots ingrate Polish person, Swilatia*
And that serves them right!
In any case, his location on his profile is incorrect. The centre of Europe and thus its heart is in reality the Czech Republic, more or less. And anyone who gives me tosh about Britain (and its bloody awful weather and lovely tea) being part of Europe, well, they obviously need to examine the neighbours we'd have if that were the case. Nobody likes the French, wot!

The Rt. Hon. Lord Sir Ilaer, CBE, OBE, MBE, Lord Chancellor of the New British Imperial Party
what? wasent that after the fall of the british empire? and about thewhole poland is not the heart of europe thing: maybe withoust britain yes. but britain Is in europe, so that changes the map, and shifts the centre of europe to Poland.

what? wasent that after the fall of the british empire? and about thewhole poland is not the heart of europe thing: maybe withoust britain yes. but britain Is in europe, so that changes the map, and shifts the centre of europe to Poland.

The British Isles are not in that damn continent of yours. Look at any map of Europe and you will see that Britain is a seperate nation, wot.

The British Isles are not in that damn continent of yours. Look at any map of Europe and you will see that Britain is a seperate nation, wot.

but europe is a continent, not a nation. and explain why britain appearas on maps of europe.

but europe is a continent, not a nation. and explain why britain appearas on maps of europe.

Explain why the North Atlantic Ocean appears on the map of Europe. That's not a part of the continent, wot?

Explain why the North Atlantic Ocean appears on the map of Europe. That's not a part of the continent, wot?

Darn Brits, think they are better than everyone else. What a bunch of fruitcakes with their tea and biscuits, which is odd, because their biscuits are nasty and hard, we are the true biscuits are nice and fluffy.


/is a colonial :p

Darn Brits, think they are better than everyone else. What a bunch of fruitcakes with their tea and biscuits, which is odd, because their biscuits are nasty and hard, we are the true biscuits are nice and fluffy.


/is a colonial :p

What cheek! :eek:

Of course we are better than damn colonials such as yourself! Never would any respectable Brit speak to a superior in such a manner. Insulting our tea and biscuits?! That is despicable behaviour, wot!

*Dunks biscuit into my tea*

http://www.nice-cuppa-tea.co.uk/images/tea_test02/dunk02.jpg


You cannot dunk those squishy things you damn colonials call biscuits, wot? :p

*Dunks biscuit into my tea*

http://www.nice-cuppa-tea.co.uk/images/tea_test02/dunk02.jpg


You cannot dunk those squishy things you damn colonials call biscuits, wot? :p


Cookies. Those are cookies in that picture. Geez. I could have sworn the Brits were supposed to superior in knowledge :p

Biscuits are good with jelly, butter, or gravy..mmm :)

Cookies. Those are cookies in that picture. Geez. I could have sworn the Brits were supposed to superior in knowledge :p
We sure are superior in every way, most of our riff-raff has been shipped off to the colonies. That in the picture is not a cookie, but a chocolate digestive. The best dunking biscuit there is. :)

Biscuits are good with jelly, butter, or gravy..mmm :)

That sounds disgusting. :gundge:

We sure are superior in every way, most of our riff-raff has been shipped off to the colonies. That in the picture is not a cookie, but a chocolate digestive. The best dunking biscuit there is. :)



That sounds disgusting. :gundge:

Aww, you're so cute when you are angry ;)

We sure are superior in every way, most of our riff-raff has been shipped off to the colonies. That in the picture is not a cookie, but a chocolate digestive. The best dunking biscuit there is. :)

Biscuits are good with jelly, butter, or gravy..mmm

That sounds disgusting. :gundge:

He's right about what goes well with biscuits an the best teas are Lipton and various GREEN teas.
:cool: Oh and I almost forgot...:fluffle: :fluffle:

Aww, you're so cute when you are angry ;)

She is and so very sexy when being so British too. :)
I'm still hoping for a picture of you someday VH!

She is and so very sexy when being so British too. :)
I'm still hoping for a picture of you someday VH!

I'm waiting too :P

Aww, you're so cute when you are angry ;)
I am a British noblewoman and a respected member of the New British Imperial Party, I am certainly not cute. How dare you speak to me in such a disrespectful manner?! :eek:

I am a British noblewoman and a respected member of the New British Imperial Party, I am certainly not cute. How dare you speak to me in such a disrespectful manner?! :eek:

:fluffle: :fluffle: :fluffle: :fluffle:

I am a British noblewoman and a respected member of the New British Imperial Party, I am certainly not cute. How dare you speak to me in such a disrespectful manner?! :eek:

Cute like a kittykat!

Aww!

Cute like a kittykat!

Aww!



tee hee hee. Thanks for the backup mr ruffino :)

tee hee hee. Thanks for the backup mr ruffino :)

No problem Zizil!

Cookies. Those are cookies in that picture. Geez. I could have sworn the Brits were supposed to superior in knowledge :p

Biscuits are good with jelly, butter, or gravy..mmm :)

Indeed! Yay for The US of A. *plays patriotic muzak*

Aww, you're so cute when you are angry ;)

She is :D

I am a British noblewoman and a respected member of the New British Imperial Party, I am certainly not cute. How dare you speak to me in such a disrespectful manner?! :eek:

How dare we? We dare like this. OH! Look at the wittle vacuumhead! She's soooooooo CUTE! Don't you just wanna pinch her cheek and give her a cookie?:D

Wot, let us cut it short, huzzah, for the Queen's sake!!

*dunks Social Tea into Lady Grey Tea*

This is an OUTRAGE to all right thinking British chaps and gals and I assure you that I have no hesitation in deploying my forces into the more barbaric states of your damn jumped-up colonial union and TEACHING YOU ALL A LESSON TO BE REMEMBERED! How dare you so brazenly insult a fine British noblewomen! Perhaps Tommy Atkins and Johnny Squarerig can teach you some civilised British manners!

(And how could anyone possibly eat a biscuit with jelly? It defies all common sense

This is an OUTRAGE to all right thinking British chaps and gals and I assure you that I have no hesitation in deploying my forces into the more barbaric states of your damn jumped-up colonial union and TEACHING YOU ALL A LESSON TO BE REMEMBERED! How dare you so brazenly insult a fine British noblewomen! Perhaps Tommy Atkins and Johnny Squarerig can teach you some civilised British manners!

(And how could anyone possibly eat a biscuit with jelly? It defies all common sense

I wasn't insulting her. I said she was cute.

I wasn't insulting her. I said she was cute.

I am very much insulted, you danm colonials have neglected to speak to me with the proper respect due to my rank. I suggest to the NBIP member who is in charge of education that the cane be introduced to all schools throughout the Emparh! It's not to late for this young man to learn some good manners, beat some respect into him, wot!

I am very much insulted, you danm colonials have neglected to speak to me with the proper respect due to my rank. I suggest to the NBIP member who is in charge of education that the cane be introduced to all schools throughout the Emparh! It's not to late for this young man to learn some good manners, beat some respect into him, wot!

*puts in monocule* M'lady. I am truelly sorry if I have offended you, for it was not my intention. I was merely stating your physical apperence is pleasing. Nothing more. *bows*

*puts in monocule* M'lady. I am truelly sorry if I have offended you, for it was not my intention. I was merely stating your physical apperence is pleasing. Nothing more. *bows*

That was very gallant of you, young sir. Now please make me a cup of tea, I'm still in shock after being treated as a common woman! :eek:

That was very gallant of you, young sir. Now please make me a cup of tea, I'm still in shock after being treated as a common woman! :eek:

Would you liked iced tea or sweet tea?:p

Would you liked iced tea or sweet tea?:p

How peculiar...
Surely you don't serve cold tea? :eek:

How peculiar...
Surely you don't serve cold tea? :eek:

I daresay I do.

I daresay I do.

:eek:

*Faints*

:eek:

*Faints*

*catches* Oh fine, for you, I'll make hot tea. *hurridly does*

Wot, I am afraid I am only a damn colonist from the Canadian Dominion, huzzah! Please, for the Queen's will, amend my title, showing my damnation.

*pokes dead body of Free shepmagan, Coffee drinker*
I say, it seems my title is incorrect too. It was jolly good being a Rt. Hon, but I'm also a damn colonial from Australia, with all the jolly old convicts. Request respectfully to maintain my position: 'tis only natural the damn colonies should be administered by a damn colonial.

Wot, Jolly you're right! Huzzah, God bless the Queen!

*eats cumcumber sandwich*

*catches* Oh fine, for you, I'll make hot tea. *hurridly does*

And don't forget the sugar and whiska in mine, ya damn colonial blighter!

Anyway, blighters aside, I feel that now is the time to take the fight to the foul and un-British forces of MOBRA!!! My troops are ready for action, and I have created a small poster (http://static.flickr.com/82/252581554_6e6307ac50_o.jpg) to counter the knavish MOBRA tricks. While a rather feeble effort, I hope I can inspire the parties finer artists to pitch in, wotwot!!

(If someone can gat me a good picture of a Squarerig, I can make a naval version)

Can a damn colonial submit his rather horrid attempt?

http://i103.photobucket.com/albums/m123/gatelover12/BritishFlagcopy.jpg

I blame lack of tea for it's sucvkyness:p

Can a damn colonial submit his rather horrid attempt?

http://i103.photobucket.com/albums/m123/gatelover12/BritishFlagcopy.jpg

I blame lack of tea for it's sucvkyness:p

Damn fine point! I see that you have had some sense and taste knocked into you by civilised British company! But keep it warm, for gawd's sake!! And keep your damn jelly off my assumingly shaped biscuits!!!

I have made this point, however, to contribute something to our royal manifesto on foreign policy:

1)All former states of the Empahr shall be reconquered (for their own good, of course)
2)Any foreign power which dared insult a British citizen may expect retribution
3)Any disruption whatsoever in the flow of tea to Britain shall be met with Annexation!!!!!

Bloody Hell! The Cheek Of These Damn Colonials, And Their Rather Stupid Bastardization Of The English Language, Wotwotwot!
I, Sir Vladimir Vladinovski, Minister Of Spirits, Am Awaiting The Queen's Signal To Invade!

Can a damn colonial submit his rather horrid attempt?

I blame lack of tea for it's sucvkyness:p

That is a spiffing job, young lad. *Gives you a shilling and tuppence* Now run along and play.

That is a spiffing job, young lad. *Gives you a shilling and tuppence* Now run along and play.

I need money I can spend in America dear. Ya know, like a euro. :p

I am very much insulted, you danm colonials have neglected to speak to me with the proper respect due to my rank. I suggest to the NBIP member who is in charge of education that the cane be introduced to all schools throughout the Emparh! It's not to late for this young man to learn some good manners, beat some respect into him, wot!

My word! A sound idea my lady!

My word! A sound idea my lady!

I made a recruitment ad for your party ya crazy bloke.

My word! A sound idea my lady!

I am glad you agree, old chap. How about a toast to good, old-fashioned discipline?

http://support.jodohost.com/images/smilies/tea.gif*Sups tea*

*drinks some more whiska*
Oi chaps! Theze damn kolonials betur watch'emselvs or they be find 'emselfs in a stikky wikkit, wot!
*staggers a few meters then falls*

Explain why the North Atlantic Ocean appears on the map of Europe. That's not a part of the continent, wot?

because continents are pieces of LAND.

because continents are pieces of LAND.
You told me to explain why Britain appears on maps of Europe if it is not a part of the continent. I was merely pointing out that the North Atlantic Ocean is no more a part of that damned continent of yours than the British Isles are, wot! Just because it appears on European maps doesn't mean it is in Europe. It is clear to see that Britain sits proudly alone (except for those bloody Irishmen).

Huzzah! God bless the Queen!

Spiffing party, you've got here gentlemen. *Strokes false moustace*

I wish to join as a lady lord, if you would be so good.

Also, may I suggest a possible officeh? I want to be Minister of fluffles. :)

Thank you chaps, jolly good show!

Jolly good, I am sure that you will make a fine addition to our party. How about we celebrate by sitting down and enjoying a nice cuppa, wotwot?

Spiffing party, you've got here gentlemen. *Strokes false moustace*

I wish to join as a lady lord, if you would be so good.

Also, may I suggest a possible officeh? I want to be Minister of fluffles. :)

Thank you chaps, jolly good show!

Also, as I'm a damn colonial, mayperhaps I could be a damn lady colonial, rather than a simple lady lord? *Fiddles with monocle*

Jolly good, I am sure that you will make a fine addition to our party. How about we celebrate by sitting down and enjoying a nice cuppa, wotwot?

Splendid idea! Are there biscuits too? ;)

Splendid idea! Are there biscuits too? ;)

Of course damn lady, only the best for us NBIP members.

*Munches biscuit*

Of course damn lady, only the best for us NBIP members.

*Munches biscuit*

Spiffing!

*Grabs biscuit and sips tea*

I am glad you agree, old chap. How about a toast to good, old-fashioned discipline?

http://support.jodohost.com/images/smilies/tea.gif*Sups tea*

A fine smiley m'lady!

Garibaldi's anybody?

A fine smiley m'lady!

Garibaldi's anybody?

I appologise for my ignorance, but what on Earth is Garibaldi's?

I am glad that you appreciate my smilies, old chap! http://cyborg2.com/images/emoticons/tea.gif

I say, gentlemen. Surely we have important matters to discuss. The Emparh is in our hands, wot!

I suggest that we ease the my countrymen into brithood, preferably in stages, such as...


http://i103.photobucket.com/albums/m123/gatelover12/american-flagcopy.jpg

After all, it's for their own good.

I suggest that we ease the my countrymen into brithood, preferably in stages, such as...


After all, it's for their own good.

That is a nice idea Sheps. :)

Americans need to recognise British superiority. They should accept the Queen as their rightful ruler.

That is a nice idea Sheps. :)

Americans need to recognise British superiority. They should accept the Queen as their rightful ruler.

Long as I can still drink coffee and worship God, I'm good. Hmmmm, can my signature fit another line, I'd like to be an unofficial quasi-supporter.

Long as I can still drink coffee and worship God, I'm good. Hmmmm, can my signature fit another line, I'd like to be an unofficial quasi-supporter.

You can still worship God, but you must recognise that He is shaped like a gunboat. :)

You can still worship God, but you must recognise that He is shaped like a gunboat. :)

... a gunboat floating in an unending sea of Tea?

... a gunboat floating in an unending sea of Tea?

Jolly good show, old boy!

I support the idea of bringing the States back into the Emparh, naturally, though I'd like to keep the things we Americans call biscuits. Maybe we should call them squishy bread-rounds, or something so as to avoid confusion?

Huzzah! For the Queen and Emparh!

My nation (I'm claiming all these people) is proud to have had such notable citizens as:

Firstly; The Captain of the Bonne Homme Richard,
(Also Known as John Paul Jones)

Secondly; Uncle Sam,

Thirdly; John Wycliffe, leader of the Lollards,

Fourthly; William of Orange,

Fifthly; Mary, Queen of Scots,

Sixthly; All the Jacobites,

Seventhly; All Attendees of The First Continental Congress,

Eightly; All Attendees of The Second Continental Congress,

And Finally; All Yankees of the Pre-Civl War Era

(Damn the Tories and British Monarchists, sir!)

(And damn Tea too!)

(MY COUNTRY TIS OF THEE, SWEET LAND OF LIBERTY, OF THEE I SING...)

(When I was young I used to be
As fine a man as you could see
The Prince of Wales, he said to me
"Come join the British Army!"

Too ra loo ra loo ra loo
They're looking for monkeys in the zoo
And If I had a face like you
I'd join the British army!)

Note: This message to be taken in good fun, not as a flame-intended rant

*looks up* Feh. You all have gunboats. I'm not an official supporter. It's your problem.

Jolly good show, old boy!

I support the idea of bringing the States back into the Emparh, naturally, though I'd like to keep the things we Americans call biscuits. Maybe we should call them squishy bread-rounds, or something so as to avoid confusion?

Huzzah! For the Queen and Emparh!

I suppose we can let you keep your squishy bread-rounds, as long as you don't pour gravy on them while on British soil. Do you agree to this compromise, old chap?

I say lads, im in a chipper mood today! Hows about a spiffin round of cricket, wot!

I say lads, im in a chipper mood today! Hows about a spiffin round of cricket, wot!

What a spiffing idea, old boy. Although I am not a good cricketer myself. How about I umpire this cricket match? I will organise the match as well, we will have members of the NBIP versus some johnny foreigners. *Carefully chooses some foreigners that have never before played cricket*

Do the Queen proud. Huzzah!

Wot! Wot! :D

Wot! Wot! :D

That reminds me. I was chatting with my kid brother earlier and he actually said wotwot. It made me laugh that, I've been typing the very same thing in this thread for the last week. So I asked him where he picked it up from and he told me Fry from Futurama said it. Anyway, it is jolly good to hear a child speak proper English, wot? :D

*swings the cricket bat, but spins and hits himself on the head*
Oh bloody hell!

Huzzah!
<snippage... for the Queen>
http://www.timegun.org/dreadnought.jpg *this is the first HMS Dreadnought - launched in 1906

My good sah, I regret to inform you that your naval archivists are becoming a damned sight incompetent! The HMS Dreadnought so pictured was, in fact, the sixth of the name. The first was in service against the Spanish Armada with the Navy Royal, in Sir Walter Raleigh's detachment, and the fourth stood in line at Trafalgar, and the HMS Dreadnought of today is a submarine in England's Navy.

I should like to petition the pertinant authorities for permission to join the Emparh. Though I may be but a Damned Colonial, I manage a decent British Imperial accent, wot. Unusually for Colonials, I spell centre and the like as such, and will disdain a zed when a far more noble S may serve.

God save the Queen!

Wot, by Jolly! Unusually for Colonials, I spell centre and the like as such, and will disdain a zed when a far more noble S may serve We now are two, darling! Here, have a cup of tea, huzzah!

Also, I would like to take part in the Imperial Cricket Game, and, by all means, God bless the Queen!

Wot, bloody weather...

Ah, cricket. Some chaps play it at the University near my home-- most of them professors of mathematics. I had no idea that there was a Washington State Cricket League until I had a bit of a chat with one over some tea (no, really).

*sips at cup*
Divine, sah!

My good sah, I regret to inform you that your naval archivists are becoming a damned sight incompetent! The HMS Dreadnought so pictured was, in fact, the sixth of the name. The first was in service against the Spanish Armada with the Navy Royal, in Sir Walter Raleigh's detachment, and the fourth stood in line at Trafalgar, and the HMS Dreadnought of today is a submarine in England's Navy.

I should like to petition the pertinant authorities for permission to join the Emparh. Though I may be but a Damned Colonial, I manage a decent British Imperial accent, wot. Unusually for Colonials, I spell centre and the like as such, and will disdain a zed when a far more noble S may serve.

God save the Queen!

It's "Z" fer cryin' out loud! Pronounced "Zee" get it right ya crazy.

Well, Zed to everyone in the English-speaking world besides the United States. Majority rules, sah. Unless you live in Florida. And, I must say: your poor punctuation and suspect spelling are most typical of Americans. It's one of the many reasons that I've elected to join The British Emparh.

Allow me, sah.


It's 'Z' for crying out loud! That is pronounced 'zee'. Get it right, you crazy!

Refounded? Again? And me, the one who started it all, not even a member? Tish-tosh I say! I demand my old title back! And some booze!

Well, Zed to everyone in the English-speaking world besides the United States. Majority rules, sah. Unless you live in Florida. And, I must say: your poor punctuation and suspect spelling are most typical of Americans. It's one of the many reasons that I've elected to join The British Emparh.

Allow me, sah.

It's called phonetic spelling. I was using it for effect you crazy brit-lover. :p

Phonetic spelling, of course. Silly old me. Because phonetic spelling is always right. Oh yes, sah. And as for effect? The 'effect' was one of Damned Colonial Hick.:p

Phonetic spelling, of course. Silly old me. Because phonetic spelling is always right. Oh yes, sah. And as for effect? The 'effect' was one of Damned Colonial Hick.:p

We prefer redneck sah, that way we save on redcoats and can buy more tea.

Refounded? Again? And me, the one who started it all, not even a member? Tish-tosh I say! I demand my old title back! And some booze!

The founding member of the NBIP? You shall have anything you want, sah! :)

Where are those bloody servants? Shepie, fetch some of our finest wine. On the double!

I say chaps, yet more apologies for my continued absence! Tis been a jolly hard week, wot; I have been learning the glorious laws of our glorious lands! Soon, I will know how to keep johnny foreigner firmly in check! Huzzah!!!

I hope I haven't missed anyone from the membership lists, make sure you pop back for another cup of tea if I have, wotwot!

Refounded? Again? And me, the one who started it all, not even a member? Tish-tosh I say! I demand my old title back! And some booze!
I have no idea who you are... :confused: Ah! Here we are, good sah! Good to have you back, Duke of Westminister sah!

I have been waiting an awfully long time to get into this thread. Bloody Jolt. :rolleyes:

I have been waiting an awfully long time to get into this thread. Bloody Jolt. :rolleyes:

Have some tea.

Officialleh Minister for Fluffles, Wot!

:fluffle: :fluffle: :fluffle: :fluffle: *Distributes fluffles with refined enthusiasm*

Officialleh Minister for Fluffles, Wot!

:floffle: :fleffle: :fliffle: :flaffle: *Distributes fluffles with refined enthusiasm*

I suggest a minister of fluffle restraint. Not myself of course, I plan to rermain a dammed colonial freelancer.

Officialleh Minister for Fluffles, Wot!

:antifluffle: :antifluffle: :antifluffle: :antifluffle: *Distributes fluffles with refined enthusiasm*

How dare you? :eek:

No fluffles please, we're British!

How dare you? :eek:

No fluffles please, we're British!

And you say WE'RE crazy. Your people have a minister of FLUFFLES! It's disgraceful.

I suggest a minister of fluffle restraint. Not myself of course, I plan to rermain a dammed colonial freelancer.

I am restrained and refined, thankyou very much.

How dare you? :eek:

No fluffles please, we're British!

Which explains why you have a minister for fluffles :rolleyes:

I am restrained and refined, thankyou very much.



Which explains why you have a minister for fluffles :rolleyes:

This is an abomination! Surely your job is to stop public fluffling? :confused:

This is an abomination! Surely your job is to stop public fluffling? :confused:

It has to be. It's the only sane option.

:fluffle:

:flaffle:

No need to be vulgar.

This is an abomination! Surely your job is to stop public fluffling? :confused:

No no! I promote fluffling in the comfort of one's own home. Wot!
Only way we're going to outbreed these forigners ;-)

:fluffle:

:fluffle:

No no! I promote fluffling in the comfort of one's own home. Wot!
Only way we're going to outbreed these forigners ;-)(that sentence previously concealed)



:fluffle:

If you're going to compare it to fornication then that's all the reason we need to ban it from meetings of these honourable members! Now stop this insanity, or I shall jolly well slit your throat!

Dear friends!

There's no need to be fighting over fluffling, wot. Let's all just have a jolly good cup of tea now, eh?

You should rename the party "The New Pickel Weaselian Imperial Party, wot"

Wot, another damn colonist like myslef not member of our Mighty Party? Sah, God bless the Queen!

Cumcumber sandwich anyone?

If you're going to compare it to fornication then that's all the reason we need to ban it from meetings of these honourable members! Now stop this insanity, or I shall jolly well slit your throat!

Calm down good sah, I understand that you are appalled at seeing this display of fluffling. But us Brits are a civilised people, we do not slit throats, wot! The correct way to execute somebody is a public hanging or beheading.

Calm down good sah, I understand that you are appalled at seeing this display of fluffling. But us Brits are a civilised people, we do not slit throats, wot! The correct way to execute somebody is a public hanging or beheading.
Here here! A good beheading is the only civilised way, wot!

I say, good Lord Sir Little Monkies, you seem to have misinterpreted your brief! You are Minister for the Control of Fluffles - you may only use them as a last resort! We are British, good sah, we do not dispense such vulgarity unless essential to the future of the Emparh!

The election begins tomorrow, chaps, so let's get the campaign into full swing! Pip pip, and huzzah for Her Majesty!

The election begins tomorrow, chaps, so let's get the campaign into full swing! Pip pip, and huzzah for Her Majesty!

Tomorrow you say sah? One has been lax in ones duties of late but one will swing into action now sah.

Vote BNIP for the glory of the Empire and Her Majesty!

I will spread the word of Her Majesties glorious Emparh, in preperation for tomorows elections.

Huzzah!

Philosopy, old chap! How about we offer the brave men of our navy additional incentive to hunt down those pirate scum? Every ship captain that brings the head of a Punks And Pirates party member will be rewarded with a title and land or gold. The last thing we need is for pirates to be in power, wot?
:gundge:

Philosopy, old chap! How about we offer the brave men of our navy additional incentive to hunt down those pirate scum? Every ship captain that brings the head of a Punks And Pirates party member will be rewarded with a title and land or gold. The last thing we need is for pirates to be in power, wot?
Well, I'm not sure that taking off the heads of the opposing parties would be considered in the spirit of this election, good Lady Sah! Instead, when we have won our glorious victory at the polls, we shall legislate immediately to outlaw all pirates from Her Majesty's glorious Emparh, wot!

Well, I'm not sure that taking off the heads of the opposing parties would be considered in the spirit of this election, good Lady Sah! Instead, when we have won our glorious victory at the polls, we shall legislate immediately to outlaw all pirates from Her Majesty's glorious Emparh, wot!

If you say so sah! Although I think all pirates deserve to be killed on sight, wot!

If you say so sah! Although I think all pirates deserve to be killed on sight, wot!
We must play by the rules of the election, wot! We are Gentleman, good Lady Sah!

Be patient, my honourable and noble chap. There will be time for all our ambitions once the election has been won, wotwot!

We must play by the rules of the election, wot! We are Gentleman, good Lady Sah!

Be patient, my honourable and noble chap. There will be time for all our ambitions once the election has been won, wotwot!

Fair enough, dear fellow. I will tolerate these bloody pirates until the elections have ended.

Patience is a virtue, wot!

We must play by the rules of the election, wot! We are Gentleman, good Lady Sah!

Be patient, my honourable and noble chap. There will be time for all our ambitions once the election has been won, wotwot!

Will the time come when the Pirates have succesfully raided many of your ships going, loaded with valuable goods? The Imperials should defend themselves against these brutes! You must act now, before they cheat their way into power!

Will the time come when the Pirates have succesfully raided many of your ships going, loaded with valuable goods? The Imperials should defend themselves against these brutes! You must act now, before they cheat their way into power!

Defence! Defence! It is not an issue of defence, wot! Our gunboats and Dreadnoughts are the finest vessels on Her Majesty's oceans, wot! They strike fear into all who see them, and will sink any aggressor and be home for a nice cuppa before the pirates know what hit them, wot wot!

Beheading the opposing candidates in the election is against the rules, however, and so, as long as the election is running, public executions shall be limited to hangings for witches and ballbase fans only, wot!

Defence! Defence! It is not an issue of defence, wot! Our gunboats and Dreadnoughts are the finest vessels on Her Majesty's oceans, wot! They strike fear into all who see them, and will sink any aggressor and be home for a nice cuppa before the pirates know what hit them, wot wot!

Beheading the opposing candidates in the election is against the rules, however, and so, as long as the election is running, public executions shall be limited to hangings for witches and ballbase fans only, wot!

I wish I knew what ballbase is!

I wish I knew what ballbase is!
It is that perverted form of the blesséd game of cricket that the yanks play, wot!

Beheading the opposing candidates in the election is against the rules, however, and so, as long as the election is running, public executions shall be limited to hangings for witches and ballbase fans only, wot!

You are right, old bean. I spoke hastily when suggesting that those pirate scum should be beheaded. We will keep it clean for now, wot!

I wish I knew what ballbase is!

It is that game you damn colonials play. I am glad to hear that you are not a fan, otherwise you would be sent to the gallows!

It is that perverted form of the blesséd game of cricket that the yanks play, wot!

Aye, I see.

I must agree with the ballbase dislike; football is much better.

However, I disagree with a lot of other things.

But I do have a suggestion for your terror alert scale: ;) :p ;) :p

Green- All's well
Blue- Ignorance
Yellow- A bloody Nuisance
Orange- Talk With It over Tea Time
Red- Ask The Yanks For Help

(since that is all the brits are now ;) :p )

I must agree with the ballbase dislike; football is much better.

However, I disagree with a lot of other things.

But I do have a suggestion for your terror alert scale: ;) :p ;) :p

Green- All's well
Blue- Ignorance
Yellow- A bloody Nuisance
Orange- Talk With It over Tea Time
Red- Ask The Yanks For Help

(since that is all the brits are now ;) :p )

tee hee hee I like your thinking :D

I say, will you be planning to reclaim the Australian colonies at some point?

We damn colonials have been too long without the wholesome influence of Her Majesty's Glorious Emparh, excepting of course, The Bill.

tee hee hee I like your thinking :D

Thnx.

One more thing:

http://forums.jolt.co.uk/showthread.php?p=11705166#post11705166

The only party you need to know about.

I say, will you be planning to reclaim the Australian colonies at some point?

We damn colonials have been too long without the wholesome influence of Her Majesty's Glorious Emparh, excepting of course, The Bill.
Are you offering to help, good sah? We would of course need a new Governor-General of Australia when the election is won, wot! The post is yours if you swear your allegiance to Her Majesty, pip pip!

Are you offering to help, good sah? We would of course need a new Governor-General of Australia when the election is won, wot! The post is yours if you swear your allegiance to Her Majesty, pip pip!

PREPARE THE SANCTIONS!

(And the Minarian forces, a power the likes of which have never been seen east of The Wenesglom.)

Thnx.

One more thing:

http://forums.jolt.co.uk/showthread.php?p=11705166#post11705166

The only party you need to know about.




Naw, I am the pope of Cypsw party.

Are you offering to help, good sah? We would of course need a new Governor-General of Australia when the election is won, wot! The post is yours if you swear your allegiance to Her Majesty, pip pip!

Top-hole!

I solemnly swear that I will be faithful and bear true allegiance to Her Majesty Queen Elizabeth, Her Heirs and Successors according to law. So help me God...

...And all that rot.

Calls for a cup of tea to celebrate, eh chaps?

Top-hole!

I solemnly swear that I will be faithful and bear true allegiance to Her Majesty Queen Elizabeth, Her Heirs and Successors according to law. So help me God...

...And all that rot.

Calls for a cup of tea to celebrate, eh chaps?
I will never say no to a cup of tea, wot! Tea is God's greatest gift, a jewel in liquid form!

PREPARE THE SANCTIONS!

(And the Minarian forces, a power the likes of which have never been seen east of The Wenesglom.)

So you are the leader of the two-man party? Go and play with the other children, you are not ready for politics just yet.

So you are the leader of the two-man party? Go and play with the other children, you are not ready for politics just yet.

:mad:

*calms* Let's see if I can get myself a seat at the very least...

Next year, the TDP will be even better.

:mad:

*calms* Let's see if I can get myself a seat at the very least...

Next year, the TDP will be even better.

So you say...

So you say...

I say! :p

I am very much insulted, you danm colonials have neglected to speak to me with the proper respect due to my rank. I suggest to the NBIP member who is in charge of education that the cane be introduced to all schools throughout the Emparh! It's not to late for this young man to learn some good manners, beat some respect into him, wot!

I see that while I have been gone the standards of this party have slipped somewhat. Why, for people to be insulting the The Right Honourable Lady Lord Vacuumhead, in fact for people to be insulting women at all, is an abomination most certainly not in keeping with the fine traditions of the Emparh! I say, Lady Lord Vacuumhead, are you alright? If not then I shall be happy to stand as your champion and fight a duel with these scoundrels who insulted you!

must agree with the ballbase dislike; football is much better.

However, I disagree with a lot of other things.

But I do have a suggestion for your terror alert scale:

Green- All's well
Blue- Ignorance
Yellow- A bloody Nuisance
Orange- Talk With It over Tea Time
Red- Ask The Yanks For Help

(since that is all the brits are now )

This Minaris should be shot!
Ask the Yanks for help! What cheek!
Might I ask what the 'Yanks' did after 11/9 (using the British way of displaying dates, and not the damnfool American way)?
Invaded Afghanistan. A tad overreacting, methinks.
Especially since you dragged fair Britannia into your stupid 'War on Terror', a war that has brought little else but suffering and pain to millions of people in all the countries concerned?

The terror alert scheme should be like this:
Green - Continue As Usual
Blue - Admit That Just Possibly Something Is happening
Yellow - Break Out The Tea
Orange - Chin Up And Remain Cheerful/Blitz Spirit
Red - Win

And for the most severe of situations we may find ourselves in (such as another penalty shootout in football) we may even break out the coffee.

In any case, you, as a presumed American, probably happen to have broken an obscure British law somewhere. The USA, as a nation born out of a revolution and thus fundamentally illegitimate (as are all those former colonies of the Emparh which we did not grant independence to of our own accord, no matter what the UN may say) are still standing on what is technically British soil and are thus currently under British jurisdiction. Though Britain may have recognised the USA's independence after the Revolution that does not make you legitimate, in my humble opinion.
Now renounce your claims to independence and kneel before Her Most Glorious Majesty, the Queen of Great Britain and Northern Ireland, Elizabeth I, and swear fealty to her. Go on, do it. Or I'll shoot you.

Sorry for my long absence by the way, chaps, but my damned mother took it into her head to ban me from my laptop, something which rather annoyed me as I am, in fact, a computer games programmer. :rolleyes:

Hoping that you are all well, and, as matter of fact, to that smart alec who mentioned those HMS Dreadnoughts previous to the one pictured earlier, the Dreadnought class of battleships takes precedence. The only ship of the line from any period pre-Dreadnought class years that is of any importance is HMS Victory, the world's only remaining ship of the line and the oldest Royal Navy ship still in existence and in good condition.

Rule Britannia, and may God's 15 inch guns forever ensure the Emparh's success!
Huzzah, wot!
The Right Honourable Ilaer, OBE, MBE, CBE, Lord Chancellor

I see that while I have been gone the standards of this party have slipped somewhat. Why, for people to be insulting the The Right Honourable Lady Lord Vacuumhead, in fact for people to be insulting women at all, is an abomination most certainly not in keeping with the fine traditions of the Emparh! I say, Lady Lord Vacuumhead, are you alright? If not then I shall be happy to stand as your champion and fight a duel with these scoundrels who insulted you!



This Minaris should be shot!
Ask the Yanks for help! What cheek!
Might I ask what the 'Yanks' did after 11/9 (using the British way of displaying dates, and not the damnfool American way)?
Invaded Afghanistan. A tad overreacting, methinks.
Especially since you dragged fair Britannia into your stupid 'War on Terror', a war that has brought little else but suffering and pain to millions of people in all the countries concerned?

The terror alert scheme should be like this:
Green - Continue As Usual
Blue - Admit That Just Possibly Something Is happening
Yellow - Break Out The Tea
Orange - Chin Up And Remain Cheerful/Blitz Spirit
Red - Win

And for the most severe of situations we may find ourselves in (such as another penalty shootout in football) we may even break out the coffee.

In any case, you, as a presumed American, probably happen to have broken an obscure British law somewhere. The USA, as a nation born out of a revolution and thus fundamentally illegitimate (as are all those former colonies of the Emparh which we did not grant independence to of our own accord, no matter what the UN may say) are still standing on what is technically British soil and are thus currently under British jurisdiction. Though Britain may have recognised the USA's independence after the Revolution that does not make you legitimate, in my humble opinion.
Now renounce your claims to independence and kneel before Her Most Glorious Majesty, the Queen of Great Britain and Northern Ireland, Elizabeth I, and swear fealty to her. Go on, do it. Or I'll shoot you.

Sorry for my long absence by the way, chaps, but my damned mother took it into her head to ban me from my laptop, something which rather annoyed me as I am, in fact, a computer games programmer. :rolleyes:

Hoping that you are all well, and, as matter of fact, to that smart alec who mentioned those HMS Dreadnoughts previous to the one pictured earlier, the Dreadnought class of battleships takes precedence. The only ship of the line from any period pre-Dreadnought class years that is of any importance is HMS Victory, the world's only remaining ship of the line and the oldest Royal Navy ship still in existence and in good condition.

Rule Britannia, and may God's 15 inch guns forever ensure the Emparh's success!
Huzzah, wot!
The Right Honourable Ilaer, OBE, MBE, CBE, Lord Chancellor

Never. You Frenchies need to realize that you failed. Miserably.

now you are a pale leftover from the Age of Imperialism.
The US currently has the power, but soon...

As for THIS:

Green - Continue As Usual
Blue - Admit That Just Possibly Something Is happening
Yellow - Break Out The Tea
Orange - Chin Up And Remain Cheerful/Blitz Spirit
Red - Win


You are mistaken. I had it better.

One final comment: FOOTBALL RULES! (The TRUE kind, not soccer (it rules too, but...)

Oh yeah, VIVA ITALIA!

Blah, blah, blah...

I am appalled at your continued bad behaviour. If you were not just a pesky child, then I would be asking the gentleman Ilaer to challenge you to a duel. Now if you refuse to recognise British superiority and learn how to treat your elders and betters with respect, then I will be forced to have you caned. Now behave!

I have no idea who you are... :confused: Ah! Here we are, good sah! Good to have you back, Duke of Westminister sah!
Splendiferous!

In case any of you chaps are interested in the ancient history of our glorious party, here (http://forums.jolt.co.uk/showthread.php?t=443192) is the first ever NBIP thread! Jolly good show all of you for carrying the torch onwards all these months.

Tally-ho for now,

The Rt. Hon. Lord Sir Praetonia CBE OBE MBE Duke of Westminister

(By the way old chaps: you couldn't see your way to giving me a KBE too? And maybe an OG? Or making me a Knight of the Bath?)

-Snipped in the name of Her Majesty-
Ilaer, old chap, good to have you back, wot!

In case any of you chaps are interested in the ancient history of our glorious party, here (http://forums.jolt.co.uk/showthread.php?t=443192) is the first ever NBIP thread! Jolly good show all of you for carrying the torch onwards all these months.

What a glorious history our marvellous Emparh has! It makes me feel truly humble to see how our party has been here longer than I have, wotwot!

Let us go forth and continue this fine tradition of ensuring that no Englishman is ever left without tea!

I am appalled at your continued bad behaviour. If you were not just a pesky child, then I would be asking the gentleman Ilaer to challenge you to a duel. Now if you refuse to recognise British superiority and learn how to treat your elders and betters with respect, then I will be forced to have you caned. Now behave!

:mad:

Who says I am a child?

And I'm "pesky".

Dude, if you want to criticize your opponent, at least size them up properly.

One more thing:

Brit tea and crumpets are nasty. Soda and pasta for me! :eek:

:mad:

Who says I am a child?

And I'm "pesky".

Dude, if you want to criticize your opponent, at least size them up properly.

I can tolerate rude behaviour in children. Boys will be boys, wot! However I cannot stand by and listen to an adult insult Her Majesty's Emparh!

Have at you, damn colonial rotter!http://forums.allaboutjazz.com/images/smilies/duel.gif

Enguarde! *Pulls out magic sword. Stabs Vaccuumhead in his shoulder.*

Fight now! :p

Enguarde! *Pulls out magic sword. Stabs Vaccuumhead in his shoulder.*

Fight now! :p

Magic! What world are you living in? :eek:

The poor fool is deluded. *Shakes head sadly*

I'll have you know, I am a superb swordswoman. *Draws blade*

Just a joke about the magic... or is it? :eek:

*Evades VH'd blows and chops her arms off*

now what? :D

Just a joke about the magic... or is it? :eek:

*Evades VH'd blows and chops her arms off*

now what? :D

You don't have the faintest idea of what a duel involves, wot! In your made-up fairy world you imagine a British noblewoman to stand still whilst a commoner chops off her limbs. My guard is excellent, I would certainly put up more of a fight than that.

Now young lad, when you have leaned to roleplay properly then come back and I'll show you how an English noble duels. I will not play with a god-modding little rotter such as yourself. I expected a serious duel, not some bloody kid lost in a fantasy world. :rolleyes:

You don't have the faintest idea of what a duel involves, wot! In your made-up fairy world you imagine a British noblewoman to stand still whilst a commoner chops off her limbs. My guard is excellent, I would certainly put up more of a fight than that.

Now young lad, when you have leaned to roleplay properly then come back and I'll show you how an English noble duels. I will not play with a god-modding little rotter such as yourself. I expected a serious duel, not some bloody kid lost in a fantasy world. :rolleyes:

Again with the kid stuff...

Enough with this deuling... it is going nowhere and is barbaric.

Oh, yes. I forgot.

France>Britain

Again with the kid stuff...
Well godmodding is immature as well as being bloody annoying.

Enough with this deuling... it is going nowhere and is barbaric.
It was getting nowhere because you are a filthy goddmodder. Read this (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Godmodding) and avoid doing anything written on that page, then maybe you could have fun duels.

Oh, yes. I forgot.

France>Britain
Your attempt to offend me is pathetic at best. I don't give a toss about what damn colonials such as yourself think.

First, the duel was a joke. An attempt to humor you.

second, I truly believe that dueling over such an issue should be left to politicians (have them fight wars=no more combat! :D :p )

Thirdly, I cannot support anyone wishing colonialism, as it is invariably authoritarian, racist, and/or otherwise harmful.

Its effects are as follows

Political- Someone having no care or knowledge of your needs makes the decisions. You have no say and are considered unclean.

Economy- crashes and burns due to overbearing regulation and tariffs

Religious- Ever see any Indian rituals going on in Georgia? Not really. This is obvious. If you doubt me, check out the Spaniards and Portugese and all of them in Brazil.

Social- completely annihilated by the imperials who rearrange and thusly ruin everything the natives built

Intellectual- Depends. Sometimes positive, but often, ideas are destroyed, even the most accurate ones. (see Library at Alexandria (Caesar burnt it! So many good ideas... :mad: ))

Artistic- completely destroyed.


For the aforementioned reasons, and many more, I hereby denounce this party's imperialism.
-----------------------------------------------------------------

As fo the rest, well, the above kinda ruins it.

OOCly, do you happen to go to the Northwest School in Seattle Washington? Because your post seems very inspired by their curriculum. If so, TG me. I'm curious as to who you are.

ICly:

I imagine that I'm going to be outposted by you faster typists, but allow me to defend our collective honour.

While Imperialism has, in the past, proven to have unfortunate events, I would challenge you to prove to me that Imperialism has to be this way. I'll use your five-aspect system here for brevity-- I hardly desire to write an essay.

Political: Not necessarily true. There is nothing to prevent the Colonial power from allowing full participation in the system, and it has certainly been done before. In British India, for example, a reform-minded British Parliament formed an advisory board of native people in the mid-to late C19th. It was on its way to being made a governing body with legislative powers before George Nathaniel Curzon, newly appointed Governor General, abolished it. Part of England's past problems have been that liberal governments are frequently followed by conservative ones (whigs and tories, historically), meaning that the reforms passed by one are abolished by the other.

Economic: SIMPLY not true. According to historian Niall Ferguson (Empire, 2004), the British draw on India's economic wealth amounted to roughly one per-cent of the colony's GDP. Since India was the most economically developed of the colonies capable of the most industrialisation, it is far and away the closest to what a modern-day colony might look like.

Religious: But, is religion even a good thing? Certainly, some of the native practises were disturbing and harmful. For example, take the tradition in which a widow is thrown on her husband's funeral pyre (northern India) or the losing team in a pseudo-basketball game loses their life to the Gods (Central America). Of course, other rituals were lost too. It was certainly a crime that so many lost their traditions, but not resulting from any BRITISH action. Spanish and Portuguese were much more brutal (that regrettable inquisition business), but all missionaries from Britain came on their own recognizance, and not supported by any act of government.

Social: Because what the natives built was something better? I direct you to the religious point above. Furthermore, the British invested some 270 million pounds in India by the late 1880s, not much less than one fifth of their entire investment overseas. They increased the area of irrigated land eight times over, and by the end of the Raj a quarter of the Indian Subcontinent was irrigated, rather than just 5% under the native Mughal rulers. Social development comes on the back of economic development, and Britain put its money into it.

Artistic: Have you ever heard of Chinoise? It was a European fashion-craze in which everything Japanese, Chinese and Indian was considered the height of beautiful. People would covet cheap katanas, painted screens of rice paper or ornamental Mughal decorations. I suggest that you do your research.

*Looks pointedly at Ilaer*

Sah, your ignorance of the history of our Royal Navy is shocking! To claim that the HMS Victory is the only vessel of importance from our pre-1906 days is simply absurd, and I should point you to the exploits of John Hawkins, Francis Drake, Monck, and many, many others as evidence. After all, it wasn't Nelson who secured England's place at sea-- that was the responsibility of Drake, Hawkins and others who defeated Spain's 'armada' (they outnumbered and outgunned it, see To Rule the Waves by Arthur Herman). Many others kept Britain's place before Nelson-- Jervis, Rodney, the aforementioned Monck.

While it is all well and good to flippantly mention the Dreadnought class as being the epitome of Britain's power, that was hardly the case. By that time, Britain was trying to keep pace with Germany-- and its ships were outclassed. It was through sheer bloody-mindedness that Jellicoe 'won' at Jutland, and while I'd be the first to say that this battle was instrumental in winning the war, it was hardly another Trafalgar.

Drake would be hurt, sah.

Minaris:

What you call 'football' is simply the perversion of an English sport known as Rugby. Rugby is a lot like American football, but it dispenses with the padding that you Damned Secessionalist Colonials seem to need. Essentially, Rugby is a man's version of football. (No offence to Lady Lord Vaccuumhead, of course).

The rest of your post seems to follow little pattern and fragments into poorly connected sentences such as 'The US has the power, but soon...' followed by a totally unrelated list, for which you neglected to use the quote function. Base plagarism, sah!

Furthermore, by failing to use the quote function, you seem to be informing yourself that you had it better. While our superior British minds were able to decipher it, most of our shared countrymen (assuming that you're a Damned Colonial Secessionist Yank) would be vexed indeed.

You further manage to blurt 'VIVA ITALIA', lending credence to the possibility that you're a Damned Papist Neapolitan Fascist. If this is so, I would request that you sod off before someone has the sense to raise Cromwell from the dead and send him your way.

[/in-character rant]

Fine. Since you ALMOST failed to understand whom I was addressing, I quoted your post which was just posted by you.

Football is a quite enjoyable sport. It is very similar to Rugby, except the pads; those were to shut up the "Blame Others First" Liberals, who would have never accepted the sport in any other condition.

"The US... soon..." was a remark that was made as a joke, left open-ended to allow freedom of thought, something everyone needs to excersize from time to time (especially a certain portion of the US... Not saying they are all idiots, but I wonder about them...)

The "VIVA ITALIA" thing stemmed from my heritage. I am Italian, so I was honoring my ancestry in that manner.

Finally, the list was addressing something else.

Now, if you excuse me, I have to go.

Mph, edited that since so much had gone on since I'd started typing it. It was amusingly acerbic and not particularly interesting. However, when/if you get back, do have a look at what I just said a post ago.

Yeah, I saw your post...

However, i still believe that the imperialism done by the British was not the moral/"right" move, although we would (probably) be worse off without their imperialism.

Are you offering to help, good sah? We would of course need a new Governor-General of Australia when the election is won, wot! The post is yours if you swear your allegiance to Her Majesty, pip pip!

Wot, may I ask if her Majesty already has a representant for the Damned Canadian Dominion? I would be very much pleased to spread the British Imperialism (and tea) throughout the largest ''self-governed'' land of the Emparh!

God bless the Queen, by Jolly! Wot!

~~~

Damn Colonial Zouloukistan Minister for The Eradication of Coffee

Just 'cuz you said that...

Long live coffee, soda, and all non-tea caffeinated drinks! w00t!

Just 'cuz you said that...

Long live coffee, soda, and all non-tea caffeinated drinks! w00t!

Coffee pwns yo.

The Sultanate of Obok Kyorl requests an audience with the one who speaks for your Majesty's Government. An alliance with your Great "Empah" would see to it that your intrests in "Eastern Affairs" would be satisfied.

At Minaris: I was more referring to the question I asked you. To wit: Do you go to Northwest School in Seattle, Washington? Your 'five elements of society' thing was right out of the 9th grade humanities lectures, (possible co-incidence, I know) and your discussion of Imperialism sounds very much like what they said in 10th grade.

Oh, the PERSIA thing?

No, i didn't go there; that is standard AP/college stuff...

and i pulled the imperialism stuff out of my a--(censored for those who hate cussing/cursing).

Hm... just thought I'd ask.

this party http://www.funny-pictures.biz/images%20for%20web/sucks.jpg

I'm clever, I know :)

http://img99.imageshack.us/img99/8733/gpwnpl8.png

http://img99.imageshack.us/img99/8733/gpwnpl8.png

Haha, thats a good one :D

Calm down good sah, I understand that you are appalled at seeing this display of fluffling. But us Brits are a civilised people, we do not slit throats, wot! The correct way to execute somebody is a public hanging or beheading.

You make a good point there, wot! I've obviously been at the front (well, 30 miles behind it in a re-enforced bunker. Near enough!) too long. I remmeber when we ran out of bullets, the axe was blunt, and some blighter had stolen the gallows rope, back in Fort Marlborough. But I don't need to tell civilised people like you what the men did when we caught a deserter there...

If you say so sah! Although I think all pirates deserve to be killed on sight, wot!

Damn jolly good show! But you really don't want to know what we did the pirates at Fort Marlborough!

For the furtherance of our noble goals, a poster!
http://i25.photobucket.com/albums/c95/Spoat/BritImperialistposterfin.png

Jolt! You have taken away our image tags! I demand satisfaction!

For the furtherance of our noble goals, a poster!
http://i25.photobucket.com/albums/c95/Spoat/BritImperialistposterfin.png

Jolt! You have taken away our image tags! I demand satisfaction!

Ha, I'm not on that map :P

Some ancient historic posters for you chaps to use:

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v387/Praetonia/NBIP.png


http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v387/Praetonia/britannia.png


and this is nice:

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v387/Praetonia/animated_union_jack2.gif

and this could have some use or other:


http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v387/Praetonia/NBIPflag.png

A chronicle of the beginning of the first (important :p) British defeat!

Narrator: In 1776 A.D. War was beginning

King: What happen
Servant 1: someone set up us the Declaration of Independence
Servant 2: We get mail
King: What!!!?
Servant 2: Main letter read on
King: It's you
George Washington: How are you gentlemen
George Washington: All your colony are belong to us
King: What you say!
George Washington: You have no chance make your time
George Washington: ha ha ha
Servant 2: King!!
King: Take off every redcoat!
Servant 2: You know what you doing?
King: Move redcoat
King: for great justice

Vote chaps!

http://www.hlj.me.uk/ns/election/

Play nice and fair, and victory will be ours! Whatever you do, don't vote twice - it will be detected, and we'll lose both votes, wot! We are Gentleman - let us go forth honourably!

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v427/vonbek/rourke.gif

Vote NBIP
Forward for the Emparh

No!!!

Don't vote NBIP!

Vote Defenderist!!!!

Originally Posted by Gurguvungunit
*Looks pointedly at Ilaer*

Sah, your ignorance of the history of our Royal Navy is shocking! To claim that the HMS Victory is the only vessel of importance from our pre-1906 days is simply absurd, and I should point you to the exploits of John Hawkins, Francis Drake, Monck, and many, many others as evidence. After all, it wasn't Nelson who secured England's place at sea-- that was the responsibility of Drake, Hawkins and others who defeated Spain's 'armada' (they outnumbered and outgunned it, see To Rule the Waves by Arthur Herman). Many others kept Britain's place before Nelson-- Jervis, Rodney, the aforementioned Monck.

While it is all well and good to flippantly mention the Dreadnought class as being the epitome of Britain's power, that was hardly the case. By that time, Britain was trying to keep pace with Germany-- and its ships were outclassed. It was through sheer bloody-mindedness that Jellicoe 'won' at Jutland, and while I'd be the first to say that this battle was instrumental in winning the war, it was hardly another Trafalgar.

Drake would be hurt, sah.

HOW DARE YOU, GOOD SIR! Accusing me of being ignorant of the history of the Royal Navy!

1. I never said that the Dreadnought class was the epitome of our naval power; indeed, the creation of the Dreadnoughts weakened our position in relation to Germany prior to the Great War. Our huge fleet of pre-Dreadnought class suddenly became obsolete.

2. The Battle of Jutland was not instrumental in winning the war for two reasons:
2.i. The battle was not a true victory. The Germans lost a higher proportion of their naval strength, it is true, but we lost 14 ships against their 11, prompting the famous remark made by Admiral Jellicoe: "There seems to be something wrong with our bloody ships today."
2.ii. It would have been much better had the battle been a true defeat. If that had been the case then we might have finally had the German High Seas Fleet coming out of their harbours, and then a real naval battle could have been fought between the Grand Fleet and the High Seas Fleet. Had the Germans actually engaged in a true battle with us then we should have ended the war in our favour quite a bit earlier than it did, good sir. It was the damned German policy of bottling up their ships in their harbours that made the war last as long as it did. There was no oppotunity for a decisive battle.

3. Our ships were most certainly not outclassed, aside for our pre-Dreadnought fleet, but I think you will agree that roughly one hundred and eighty five destroyers, cruisers and battleships of the pre-Dreadnought era would have been able to defeat the Germans' pathetic seventeen Dreadnought era, especially in light of our superior training and gunnery. Technology is not the only factor in war, though we also had the advantage in technology as well as numbers, training, discipline and reputation.

4. Though the defeat of the Spanish Armada and the exploits of Sir Francis Drake certainly cemented our hold on the seas, it was the Battle of Trafalgar which truly eclipsed all others. Nelson, with his outnumbered fleet of twenty-seven ships, using untested and theoretically inferior tactics, managed to defeat a French-Spanish force of thirty-three ships with no ships lost and fourteen enemy vessels captured. Such is the stuff of legend, ensuring that never again would Britain be challenged properly at sea. Take my note above about the German policy of hiding in their harbours: why do you think this was? Kaiser Wilhelm II was extremely proud of his navy! Do you think he would have desired that it stay locked up in harbour? It was a necessary move, considering our naval strength.
And another example: have you ever heard of 'Gunboat Diplomacy'? The policy of placing a single gunboat in the harbours of colonies in order to show that the Emparh still existed and no-one had better forget it.
The last example: The 'Shortest Ever War'. The throne of the colony of Zanzibar was stolen by an usurper. A British battleship levelled the palace and the usurper fled. The war was over after thirty minutes.

Now, good sir, I would appreciate an apology.

Being a Grammar school student with a burning interest in history, particularly British and Royal Naval history, I feel that I have proved to all and sundry the fact that I most certainly am NOT ignorant of the Royal Navy's history.

And Lady Vacuumhead, my offer of standing as your champion in a duel still stands. I see that still the ignorant youth (whether or not he is physically young, his actions leave no doubt of his mental age *smirks*) plagues you, despite your counters. I assure you I have no qualms about dueling with those who are mentally youths, as honour stands above all else.

Now, a cup of tea to calm down my anger at being called ignorant of our glorious navy's history. *sips*
I thank you for your warm welcome back, Philosophy. I look forward to continuing to be of service in defending the honour of ladies and lords and of defending my own honour. :)

Which reminds me: where is the post of Gurguvungunit that I have responded so passionately to? I saw the entry in a quote and could not find it elsewhere. *blushes*

To Emparh and Commonwealth, huzzah!

The Right Honourable Ilaer, OBE, MBE, CBE, Lord Chancellor

Ooh, do sign me up please.

I would be frightfully interested in partaking in your organisation.

UK-dom, if I were you, I'd say THIS:

NEVER sign me up, EVER.

I would be frightful, partaking in your pathetic ecuse for a political organisation. :eek:

Ah, but that would be lying wouldn't it?

Not if I were you!

Vote Defenderist!

Be defended from the evils of:

-fraud and force
-Fundies
-Imperialists
-Traditionalists
-Gov't Monopolies

and more!

Why would I want to be defended from myself?

Welcome, good UK-dom, and with answers like that, you shall be our Minister for Sanity!

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v387/Praetonia/animated_union_jack2.gif
Keep voting, chaps!

http://www.hlj.me.uk/ns/election/

And remember, one vote only!

I am amused my good chap, that is the first time I have been called sane in quite a long time.

Excuse me a moment, I'm off to stock up on tea.

Why would I want to be defended from myself?

You wouldn't be. That's part of the manifesto.

Very good.

Now calm down good chap, take a deep breath and then move off to your part of the world.

Thank you. :)

God bless the Queen! http://www.teenhelp.org/groups/images/smilies/3dflagsdotcom_uk_2faws.gif

My vote has been cast.
Has yours?

I say, this voting lark is quite simple, isn't it? Jolly good.

God save the Queen!

UK-dom, if I were you, I'd say THIS:

:eek:

Good lord! Call the police! Call out the militia! Off with his head!

Good lord! Call the police! Call out the militia! Off with his head!

I'm back in TDP territory. You cannot access me, as the partyless state of Minaris has their air force of awesome power here, with their network of hundreds of spy satellites and two space stations looking for you. (All possessions RP'd, BTW.)

I'm back in TDP territory. You cannot access me, as the partyless state of Minaris has their air force of awesome power here, with their network of hundreds of spy satellites and two space stations looking for you. (All possessions RP'd, BTW.)

This defenderwotsit is a bloody nuisance, wot!

Stop boasting about your awesome power thingies, they are no match for Her Majesty's secret service.

This defenderwotsit is a bloody nuisance, wot!

Stop boasting about your awesome power thingies, they are no match for Her Majesty's secret service.

Yes they are.

Oh, and one more thing: Minaris has a n00klear program! (And some ICBMs) :eek:

Yes they are.

Oh, and one more thing: Minaris has a n00klear program! (And some ICBMs) :eek:

Another moron with his finger over a red button...:rolleyes:

It is lucky for us that 007 always saves the day, wot! *Sips tea*

Another moron with his finger over a red button...:rolleyes:

It is lucky for us that 007 always saves the day, wot! *Sips tea*

we have a superior force of M-05 agents... like your spies, but better. :p :p :p

we have a superior force of M-05 agents... like your spies, but better. :p :p :p

So basically you are saying:
''Everything of mine is bigger and better than yours. nah nah nah na nah!''

And you wonder why I call you childish. :rolleyes:

So basically you are saying:
''Everything of mine is bigger and better than yours. nah nah nah na nah!''

And you wonder why I call you childish. :rolleyes:

well, NBIP hasn't exactly Rp'd anything.

So, in my mind, they are nothing more than a few tugboats and lots of hot air.

well, NBIP hasn't exactly Rp'd anything.

So, in my mind, they are nothing more than a few tugboats and lots of hot air.

I say, that is the best laugh I have had in a long time. :D

If you manage to get a single vote for your party, then maybe I could keep a straight face as you criticise the NBIP.

I say, this is a bit of a lark, this forum does not remember me.

Why does Minaris persist in the attempted conversion of people from here? He is becoming somewhat of a nuisance.

I say, that is the best laugh I have had in a long time. :D

If you manage to get a single vote for your party, then maybe I could keep a straight face as you criticise the NBIP.

As i have mentioned, my party is a beta party; it is in development.

Yours, however, is developed, so I should hope that you guys confine to the laws of NS RP. (Your party itself has no RP'd military, despite your claims, so I win since I actually stated a nation with RP'd military.

If you want to have an RP war, you need an RP'd army, which you do not have.

And you say I do not know about RP. :rolleyes: )

I say, this is a bit of a lark, this forum does not remember me.

Why does Minaris persist in the attempted conversion of people from here? He is becoming somewhat of a nuisance.

A bloody nuisance?

COOL! I raised the terror alert to yellow! :D

I suggest you prepare the tea and whatever your US is.

What is this "RP" he is mentioning?

And "US"?

Hhm, mayhap I shall have to use a useful American word to describe myself. I am as such what your fellow countrymen would call a "noob"

As i have mentioned, my party is a beta party; it is in development.

Yours, however, is developed, so I should hope that you guys confine to the laws of NS RP. (Your party itself has no RP'd military, despite your claims, so I win since I actually stated a nation with RP'd military.

If you want to have an RP war, you need an RP'd army, which you do not have.

And you say I do not know about RP. :rolleyes: )

Why should we have to RP wars to be a proper party? This is the General elections. I should bloody well hope there are no wars between rival parties, this is supposed to be a democratic election, wot!

Also, you are the only person saying yours is the better party. Take the hint...

Why should we have to RP wars to be a proper party? This is the General elections. I should bloody well hope there are no wars between rival parties, this is supposed to be a democratic election, wot!

Also, you are the only person saying yours is the better party. Take the hint...

I say, what a jolly good whalloping, m'Lud! Give 'im the other barrel, wot.

I say, what a jolly good whalloping, m'Lud! Give 'im the other barrel, wot.

He is an immature little pest, who's campaign just involves insulting other parties and driving away potential voters by being so bloody annoying. I am somewhat concerned about bringing myself to his level, by continuing with this petty arguement. Although I suppose one must defend Queen and country, wot?

I'm done. Don't worry.

Pity that you cannot act IC better though... it was sort of fun.

What with the fake NS mud-slinging and all...

I was joking the whole time... after the intellectual portion, of course.

Sah, let it be known that I find your double-posting most uncouth!

Sorry about the double posting.

CPU problems. I'll fix it...

I would urge you to, old chap.

Done.

and, BTW, thanks for hosting the mock mud-sling here, BNIP.

Although I disagree with your ideology, you guys aren't that bad.

1. I never said that the Dreadnought class was the epitome of our naval power; indeed, the creation of the Dreadnoughts weakened our position in relation to Germany prior to the Great War. Our huge fleet of pre-Dreadnought class suddenly became obsolete.
Not explicitly, no. What you said was that previous ships any name or type were 'insignificant', something which makes no sense, seeing as vessels apart from the HMS Victory did indeed participate in battles, most of which were fought long before Nelson was born. In any case, it's the battles and the men, not the specific ships, that deserve our attention.

2. The Battle of Jutland was not instrumental in winning the war for two reasons:
2.i. The battle was not a true victory. The Germans lost a higher proportion of their naval strength, it is true, but we lost 14 ships against their 11, prompting the famous remark made by Admiral Jellicoe: "There seems to be something wrong with our bloody ships today."
It was a strategic victory and a tactical defeat. In any event, the High Seas Fleet never left port again, while the Grand Fleet and the Battlecruiser Fleet were able to assert their power (to the extent that it was necessary after Jutland) wherever they wanted to. In that, we see the true importance of a battle. Trafalgar was peculiar in that it was both a strategic and tactical victory, effectively crushing the French beyond the capacity to resist. Obviously, Jutland was no Trafalgar. But in that the High Seas Fleet never took to the ocean again except to surrender, I would suggest that Jutland was very much a victory.

2.ii. It would have been much better had the battle been a true defeat. If that had been the case then we might have finally had the German High Seas Fleet coming out of their harbours, and then a real naval battle could have been fought between the Grand Fleet and the High Seas Fleet. Had the Germans actually engaged in a true battle with us then we should have ended the war in our favour quite a bit earlier than it did, good sir. It was the damned German policy of bottling up their ships in their harbours that made the war last as long as it did. There was no oppotunity for a decisive battle.
Why? The High Seas Fleet took no major offensive movements, forced no undue diversion of goods/material, sunk no ships in large number and made no threat to the Emparh. The only purpose to another battle after Jutland would have been to see more people killed unecessarily.

3. Our ships were most certainly not outclassed, aside for our pre-Dreadnought fleet, but I think you will agree that roughly one hundred and eighty five destroyers, cruisers and battleships of the pre-Dreadnought era would have been able to defeat the Germans' pathetic seventeen Dreadnought era, especially in light of our superior training and gunnery. Technology is not the only factor in war, though we also had the advantage in technology as well as numbers, training, discipline and reputation.
Our Dreadnoughts were outclassed-- they were poorly armoured in comparison to Admiral Scheer's. Further, Germany's sailors scored more hits than Britain's with fewer ships-- they weren't that poorly trained.


4. Though the defeat of the Spanish Armada and the exploits of Sir Francis Drake certainly cemented our hold on the seas, it was the Battle of Trafalgar which truly eclipsed all others. Nelson, with his outnumbered fleet of twenty-seven ships, using untested and theoretically inferior tactics, managed to defeat a French-Spanish force of thirty-three ships with no ships lost and fourteen enemy vessels captured.

Nelson's tactics were creative and brave, and again secured a tactical victory. He was arguably Britain's finest admiral in all of history, but his accomplishment ought to be kept in context. He re-secured a hold over the sea that had been won by others, first from the Dutch under de Ruyter, then from the Spanish during the War of Succession, then from the French during the Seven Years War. All of these deserve your respect, sir, not just Nelson.

Such is the stuff of legend, ensuring that never again would Britain be challenged properly at sea. Take my note above about the German policy of hiding in their harbours: why do you think this was? Kaiser Wilhelm II was extremely proud of his navy! Do you think he would have desired that it stay locked up in harbour? It was a necessary move, considering our naval strength.
Except that Alfred von Tirpitz, when he was still in favour with the Kaiser, posited that even in defeat, his better armoured warships could damage the Grand Fleet so badly that it was forced to retire. Obviously, this strategy only half-worked, and the Kaiser over-compensated by locking it up so that it wouldn't come to harm He was, in effect, so proud of his navy that he wouldn't see it defeated again, and in so doing forced its effective defeat by making it powerless.

And another example: have you ever heard of 'Gunboat Diplomacy'? The policy of placing a single gunboat in the harbours of colonies in order to show that the Emparh still existed and no-one had better forget it.
The last example: The 'Shortest Ever War'. The throne of the colony of Zanzibar was stolen by an usurper. A British battleship levelled the palace and the usurper fled. The war was over after thirty minutes.
I fail to see why this is important.


Which reminds me: where is the post of Gurguvungunit that I have responded so passionately to? I saw the entry in a quote and could not find it elsewhere. *blushes*
I edited it out and replaced it with a debate on the merits of imperialism owing to the fact that once written, some 10 or so posts had occured that made it seem a tad... unecessary.

Minaris:

Go away. You're not being funny, creative or intelligent, and you have yet to say something of substance. It's getting to the point of trolling, and it's not necessary. So, OOCly, I'm asking you to leave.

Very well. I am sorry that you could not see that I was not serious.

Good day, and remember what I said.

http://i41.photobucket.com/albums/e283/Slippery__Jim/animated_union_jack2.gif

To the polls, good people, if you have not already done so!
http://www.hlj.me.uk/ns/election/

Vote NBIP

Very well. I am sorry that you could not see that I was not serious.

Good day, and remember what I said.

Nobody is stopping you from posting here, you little twerp. I rather enjoyed our bickering, wot! :D

Nobody is stopping you from posting here, you little twerp. I rather enjoyed our bickering, wot! :D

*Returns*

Sorry, i thought Gurgunawhositthere represented you all.

In that case, let's continue, remembering that this gives your party more publicity by bumping it.

IC:
French people are better than Brits. they have better food and are more cultured.

*Returns*

Sorry, i thought Gurgunawhositthere represented you all.

In that case, let's continue, remembering that this gives your party more publicity by bumping it.

IC:
French people are better than Brits. they have better food and are more cultured.

Better food? They eat frogs, you know. Give me a nice British sunday roast, any day of the week.

http://www.shutitdown.net/img/roast.jpg

That is what I call good food, wot! It's much better than that fancy French stuff.

Better food? They eat frogs, you know. Give me a nice British sunday roast, any day of the week.

http://www.shutitdown.net/img/roast.jpg

That is what I call good food, wot! It's much better than that fancy French stuff.

Well, fush and chips are nasty.

Same with your tea that tastes like wood and your crumpets which are hard as rocks.

*all kinds of PC distress here*

http://i41.photobucket.com/albums/e283/Slippery__Jim/animated_union_jack2.gif

Make sure you cast your vote if you haven't already done so, wot!

I love this thread.

I love this thread.

Can Her Imperial Majesty count on your vote then, wot?

Can Her Imperial Majesty count on your vote then, wot?

I don't know what this vote is about, but I voted for you.

Lesson.

Uh... Gor blimey, ser.

I say chaps, we're doing rather well in the election, wot! I think that sir Philosopy deserves our thanks, for all the hard work he has done during this election campaign. Hip hip hooray!

I say chaps, we're doing rather well in the election, wot! I think that sir Philosopy deserves our thanks, for all the hard work he has done during this election campaign. Hip hip hooray!

What a spiffing old wheeze, wot?

Huzzah! Huzzah from Sir Philosopy! Huzzah!

Wot, by Jolly! Here, Philosophy, have a good cup o' tea! To the Queen! Wot, the British Emprah owes you one, sah!

I say chaps, that's jolly decent of you!

The weather has been bloody awful today, hasn't it, wot?

http://i41.photobucket.com/albums/e283/Slippery__Jim/animated_union_jack2.gif
Vote NBIP

I might be a little bit late, sahs, but I say, Sir Philosopy, You've indeed done a jolly good job! We're getting jolly good results in the elections, and we might even become the biggest party, Wot! Huzzah! Rule Brittania!

PS: When it is known how much seat her Majesty's Party will get. How shall it be decided who of us will take place in those seats? ((If this is an entirely moronic question, forgive me, I am not that well educated in political systems))

I might be a little bit late, sahs, but I say, Sir Philosopy, You've indeed done a jolly good job! We're getting jolly good results in the elections, and we might even become the biggest party, Wot! Huzzah! Rule Brittania!

PS: When it is known how much seat her Majesty's Party will get. How shall it be decided who of us will take place in those seats? ((If this is an entirely moronic question, forgive me, I am not that well educated in political systems))

I say, old boy! Let's have a tea-drinking contest!

I say, old boy! Let's have a tea-drinking contest!

Oi! Jolly good idea, sah! I'll have tea brought to the office immediatly, in sizeable quantities, Wot!.

Don't trouble yourself my good fellow, I have quite enough stored in the basement of my office to keep us alive for weeks, wot?

And well done, Mister Philosophy, sah.

Oh, and sah, If I could have my rank amended to the following, I'd be most grateful, sah.

The Rt. Hon. UK-dom Minister for givin' 'em Foreigners a damn good Clobbering.

:sniper: To all Brits! The Colonies were able to beat you for a reasion, we're better then you!

To all Brits! The Colonies were able to beat you for a reasion, we're better then you!

I say. How uncouth.

:sniper: To all Brits! The Colonies were able to beat you for a reasion, we're better then you!

Your rudeness and poor spelling just goes to show that you damn colonials are in fact inferior to us Brits. :p

Your rudeness and poor spelling just goes to show that you damn colonials are in fact inferior to us Brits. :p

What about we damn colonials who acknowledge the glory of Her Majesty's Emparh?

What about we damn colonials who acknowledge the glory of Her Majesty's Emparh?

You are not inferior, you are a respected member of the NBIP. It is a bloody shame that not all damn colonials are like you.

Would you like a cuppa, old chap?

*Quietly digs a tunnel into the NBIP's headquarters*
*Sneaks in under cover of night*
*Puts up an assortment of MOBRA posters in out-of-the-way corners*
*Posts a banner reading "All Hail the Rodent Alliance" over the door*
*Retreats to the tunnel and conceals its entrance*

((Truly, this is a wonderful thread. Were I not so firmly devoted to the advancement of rodent interests and the underground lifestyle, I would be deeply tempted to join.))

*Quietly digs a tunnel into the NBIP's headquarters*
*Sneaks in under cover of night*
*Puts up an assortment of MOBRA posters in out-of-the-way corners*
*Posts a banner reading "All Hail the Rodent Alliance" over the door*
*Retreats to the tunnel and conceals its entrance*

-snip-

Raise the militias! Mobilise the TA! Drink tea! Ran about shouting unproductively! Cordon off number 10! Invade MOBRA territories! More tea!

Huzzah!!!!!!!!

:sniper: To all Brits! The Colonies were able to beat you for a reasion, we're better then you!

Better than us, yank? To whom do you owe your cowardly backsides in both worldwars? You speak of freedom, but citizens of the Empahr are more free then any of you, and what's more, not only did your uncouth damn colonial revolution only succeed with French help (if you need military aid from France, well...), but you want on to side with the Corsican TYRANT Bonepart against the freedom loving Brits!

PS: No offence to our colonial members. I'm sure it was your spiritual ancestors who fought for the rightful government and demanded war against Hitler and Bonie from the start. Indeed, I'm sure many fine yanks served alongside us on our sips and aircraft, wotwot!

*Quietly digs a tunnel into the NBIP's headquarters*
*Sneaks in under cover of night*
*Puts up an assortment of MOBRA posters in out-of-the-way corners*
*Posts a banner reading "All Hail the Rodent Alliance" over the door*
*Retreats to the tunnel and conceals its entrance*


Dear god! Bring the rifles and Gun Boats! Save the tea! We must fight for her majesty's glory! God save the queen! Huzzah!

*Grabs a rifle and starts shooting at the MOBRA posters*
For the Emparh!
http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v427/vonbek/rourke.gif

You are not inferior, you are a respected member of the NBIP. It is a bloody shame that not all damn colonials are like you.

Would you like a cuppa, old chap?

Oh, rather.

I've only had but seven cups today. I'm sure I can fit in another cup or eight, wot?

Oh, rather.

I've only had but seven cups today. I'm sure I can fit in another cup or eight, wot?

Indeed good Sah! There can never be enough Tea old chap. However, for the Queen, you have to aid in the defense against these bloody rodents! Huzzah! Then we'll have a well deserved jolly good cup of Tea eh?

PS: Bloody weather..:mad:

Goodness gracious, rodents have been here?! :eek:

*Checks biscuit bin* The digestives have all been eaten. This is war, wot!

Wot, here, old chaps! *pours freshly brewed tea in everyone's cup*

Now, let us go fight! For the Emparh!!

Where's my moustache wax?

In the name of St George, this is war!

Goodness gracious, rodents have been here?! :eek:

*Checks biscuit bin* The digestives have all been eaten. This is war, wot!

Jolly good show miss! Help me here with these foul props the Rodents have put up!
*Grabs an old 19th century rifle from the wall and throws it to her*

Oi! Now help me shoot these buggers!

*continues shooting at the MOBRA props*

I say, tally-ho and all that. I believe a comically large whacking hammer is the ticket for dealing with moles and whatnot, wotwot?

Jolly good show miss! Help me here with these foul props the Rodents have put up!
*Grabs an old 19th century rifle from the wall and throws it to her*

Oi! Now help me shoot these buggers!

*continues shooting at the MOBRA props*

Stop this destruction at once, you are destroying the walls. :eek:

...although we can always use taxpayers money to build new headquarters.

*Shoots at MOBRA posters* Take that, you rodent rotters!

I say, tally-ho and all that. I believe a comically large whacking hammer is the ticket for dealing with moles and whatnot, wotwot?

That is a super idea, wot! Let's arm the SAS with wacking hammers and position them outside MORBA tunnels. :)

Stop this destruction at once, you are destroying the walls. :eek:

...although we can always use taxpayers money to build new headquarters.

*Shoots at MOBRA posters* Take that, you rodent rotters!

Indeed! We must destroy these devious things very Britishly! There's no better way then shooting these ruddy things with a good old Rifle from the Imperial age, Wot!

*shoots again*

Tally ho!

Besides that, we do need new walls indeed...

Besides that, we do need new walls indeed...
Our new HQ must be defensible, I say we build a castle. I will raise taxes and and get some builders started on this construction immediately.

Like they say: ''An Englishman's home is his castle.'' :)

Our new HQ must be defensible, I say we build a castle. I will raise taxes and and get some builders started on this construction immediately.


Capital idea!

I'll entice the poor with opium, barley and medicine.

Most excellent, sah. But we need more opium to go around, I say. Better to convince the plebes that we at the NBIP have their best interests at heart! To that end, I propose an immediate invasion of Afghanistan. Thanks to damned Colonial meddling, their opium crop has gone right mad.

*mans the gunboats, raises the Union Jack*

I'm off, for king and country!

On a more serious note, chaps and chapesses, how're we doing in the jolly old election business, wot?

Most excellent, sah. But we need more opium to go around, I say. Better to convince the plebes that we at the NBIP have their best interests at heart! To that end, I propose an immediate invasion of Afghanistan. Thanks to damned Colonial meddling, their opium crop has gone right mad.

*mans the gunboats, raises the Union Jack*

I'm off, for king and country!

On a more serious note, chaps and chapesses, how're we doing in the jolly old election business, wot?

as a peace offering, The Defenderist Party brings some opium so that all can try it.

If that is not what you desire, here is some coca and some marijuana from the americas.

Only if you surrender your votes, sah! In the name of the Queen!

Most excellent ideas all round! My troops are prepped to shoe Johny Afghan the error of his ways at a moments notince!

Your party has won 4 seats in Parliament. The results can be found here (http://forums.jolt.co.uk/showpost.php?p=11772706&postcount=140).

Please decide upon 4 MPs, and announce them here (http://forums.jolt.co.uk/showthread.php?t=502218) as soon as possible.