NationStates Jolt Archive

Everybody has seen the awesomeness of this wildy popular thread.. rivalling all decency of the general forum. We are in the region of Riigor Mortiis, establishing a REJECT ROYALTY OF REBELS. Create your title, and state your duties. We will alter them to our tastes.

Post them in the thread, and make sure you telegram the thread's creator with them at their nation, because he/she may not see them in this looong thread. Let's figure out a way to overthrow all that is right, and normal with the world. Free sex, violence, fires and generally sickening chaos for all who join. not for the faint of heart.

If you tged us before, and arent on here, telgram the creator of the thread again, please. Have fun, and remember - don't try and behave. No one likes that.

Your name has disappeared? Well, membership has its privileges... and its price. Again, TG the creator so that we may come to a... mutually beneficial agreement... héhéhéhéhé <- *evil laugh, French style*.
EDIT: IT IS NOTHING PERSONAL, just trying to keep the list up to date with current Kazooers actually participating in the thread.

All praise our illustrious leader, Occidio Multus.

Tribes of Longton- Official Metal Head and Evil Bastard. nutting enemies into oblivion. moonlights as a masturbation ambassador. watch out when he starts banging that head of his....

Gaeltach-Countess of Mildly Irritating Pointy Objects. manages the inventory of Pointy Devices and other torturous Objects. fills requests for Materials or Advice. heads an R&D facility to increase the effectiveness of current Devices and to create new and exciting prospects.

Peechland-Warrior Maiden.Collector of Enemy Scrotums. need we say more?

Keruvalia Dark Lord of the Shadows. fronts the progressive rock band "Kings of Cunningulus". offers personal spiritual counseling and sexual manipulation.

DHomme Leering Lurker of the Unparralelled Social Circles- once he shakes your hand and says hello- he will make a lasting, permanent, painful impression. also the Master of Ceremonies at all events.

Planners Randy Da' Asspirate, 5 year delinquent old, kleptomaniac. steals everything that isnt nailed down, and nails everything he hasnt stolen to the wall. sneaks in your house at night and rearranges the furniture.

The odd one He who tends the Garden of Evil. hes got all kinds of plants- illegal, its rumored. he also makes the most lovely planters from the skulls of slayed peasants. or your mother- in - law, if you wish.

Legless Pirates High Whore LP of the Seven Seas - If you want him, come and claim him. wait. lay the claim first, then come. Master of male bonding and female bondage.he says he is a paramedic, but explain the tongue shoved down my throat during CPR.

Chocolate Goddess Mistress of (Self) Gratification and Sin, Expert Voyeur. has extensive toy collection, and a two way mirror in her chamber. also serves as 24 hour cocktail waitress, offering special treats, coated in her own secret sauce.

Monotonous Uber Pyromaniac, Flamethrower Artiste. creates masterpieces, then destroys them. sets random fires, and runs fireworks nightly. also breaks up the homoerotic action explosives when it threatens to get out of hand.

Divine Imaginary Fluff- The Most Divine Fluffalizer- (Re)Defining how holy everyone and everything is at his very whim. Spreading insanity, freakyness and fluffiness. Laughing insanely and generally being pretty damn insane. He quotes scriptures to castlemates just to see them cringe.

Mac the MAXIMUS- official fluid taster and castle bodyguard. He protects the women of the castle in case any giant peasants mutate and try to take them captive. Also official fluid taster, beer, mixed drink, suspicious vials and various body fluids. He can name your poison in 2 seconds flat.

Pablo the Squirrel- official nut taster.Drives a pink caddy and keeps dead hookers in his trunk.

Sir Jocabia, A spicy, spicy bit of Knightly Goodness - once took a spork to the midsection to seduce a goddess. He has a very big neck that we love to "nibble" on.

Choqulya : the Last Irish Prince and Consort to the Twin Regent Queens, Keeper of the Buttons HEADmaster...minister of cult worship and kingdom fashion police and Smiter of Peasants Holy Story Teller Extordinaire. enforcer of whimisical dress codes for all.... and smiting peasants with his big fashion stick

Nekone Offical Mascot and Prime Pussy(cat).This guy is no pushover. His venomous claws are no match for the average unsuspecting peasant. He likes to curl up beside youand make you purrrrrr...meoww. But Watch out if he offers you Catnip

Her Regal Randomness, Randomea. Mistress of all things dark and random

Zatarack King of Z cinema-Equipped with many Z cinema and and some good music references. A master of a never consistent array of hand-to-hand ranged combat styles. Prone to pointless blather and bizzare dancing virtuoso. A real lady killer with his patented double dip loop-de-loop hand stand. Has yet to find sanity...not that he wants it.

ryozerkia - Mage Mystic/Sharpshooter master of magicks and shooting pointy things... with a great big bow

Staggering Drunks Stag- Lord of....er.....this thing here!
Self-proclaimed non-vampire, really. Suitor to all things made of stone and aroused by snowglobes. Also once accused of sexual harrassment by sitting quietly in the next room. king of sarcastically witty remarks and self violence with a spoon

Opressive Pacifists - Zippo Master. As a young child, set fire to his aunt's hair. Since then, has never looked back. Mother always said never to play with fire. Official kindler.

'Skinny87 - Uber-Geek - A Geek with knowledge of many things including D&D - Will roll your dice and then 'Roll Your Dice'. Note to the wary: Beware of his loaded dice.

Branin -Owner of Mouth, User of Tongue. heckling and harrassing his way right into your soul. not really, because you dont have one. but we will pretend he got that far. honest opinions freely given, among other things which are rumored to be of a personal nature.

Hyperslackovicznia: Hype~ Princess of Pleasure, Pain and Punishment.inflicts a curious mixture of the 3 on anyone who crosses her path. Her slave, Master Sadisto is at her beck and call and can devour a human with one bite. takes requests, and fills orders.great work ethic.

Aurores Lunacy, The Wicked Script Keeper - pharmacist extraordinaire to the Rebels... hands out meds whether you like or not... beware both the red and blue pills...

Nureonia, Devourer of Toddlers - ensures that small children are in fact seen but not heard. Probably is capable of using that tongue for other things such as getting in between the cracks in shoes and putting out candles.

i'm first for once

Yay, second non-intro post.

EDIT:

GOD DAMN YOU O.P.

EDIT: Yay Mac, good work with your HTML skills there buddy. It was one goddamn set of italics, and you couldn't manage it

Argh! Formatting... hurting... eyes...

Yay, [i]second[i] non-intro post.

EDIT:

GOD DAMN YOU O.P.
hey! i gave you beer!!!

*drops kilt*
*runs around naked*
who wants some?

*spanks CG*

You need to wait until we finish #7. You never could wait for a good thing. ;)

EDIT: This is the only the second time I've been on the first page of a reject royalty. The only other time was the first one [/nostalgia]

*spanks CG*

You need to wait until we finish #7. You never could wait for a good thing. ;)

EDIT: This is the only the second time I've been on the first page of a reject royalty. The only other time was the first one [/nostalgia]
tribes you're sooo pahretty when you get that look *bats eyes*

Goodbye, dear....people...
anywho...
*disappears, leaving behind 3 kegs of the homebrew*

*spanks CG*

You need to wait until we finish #7. You never could wait for a good thing. ;)

EDIT: This is the only the second time I've been on the first page of a reject royalty. The only other time was the first one [/nostalgia]

Yes, well, 8 was done.

And i can wait... if it suits me.

*Shoots Choq in the bare ass with a paintball gun as he runs past*

*Shoots Choq in the bare ass with a paintball gun as he runs past*
*runs past Choq on the opposite side and shoots him at a similar height, but at the front* :eek:

*Gives Tribes a high-five*


*Shoots Choq again when no one is looking*

What? Wasn't me.

*after recovering dresses in full plate, especially around his ...kiwis *
ha!

Goodbye, dear....people...
anywho...
*disappears, leaving behind 3 kegs of the homebrew*

*Chugs the lot and burps quietly*
Well, it would be all the better for some blood. Say, oh...... virgin's? But thats just one man's opinion

*after recovering dresses in full plate, especially around his ...kiwis *
ha!
*gets out the blowtorch*

*Chugs the lot and burps quietly*
Well, it would be all the better for some blood. Say, oh...... virgin's? But thats just one man's opinion
You are no man....

...oh, wait, yes you are. Sorry.

*Knowing how much noise a paintball makes against plate*

*Opens fire on Choq, trying to play tunes on his armour using paintballs*

*Knowing how much noise a paintball makes against plate*

*Opens fire on Choq, trying to play tunes on his armour using paintballs*

*begins rapid sucession of flowery curses, rocks bouncing off full plate onto mac and tribes*

You are no man....

...oh, wait, yes you are. Sorry.

*Checks trousers*
Errrrr
*swing hips*
Yep, yep, all there. Genitals, minus breasts, yep, pretty man like

*begins rapid sucession of flowery curses, rocks bouncing off full plate onto mac and tribes*

*Dodges rocks, picks up blowtorch*


*Starts heating the plate around Choq's 'kiwis'*

*begins rapid sucession of flowery curses, rocks bouncing off full plate onto mac and tribes*
*shielding himself with a riot shield, tribes sprints at Choq, holding something deliciously evil - a budweiser/carling conglomerate. Tribes throws it at the armour, which promptly melts from overexposure to the most foul liquid in existence, leaving Choq naked and being pelted by very sharp stones*

Serves you right. I think.

*Dodges rocks, picks up blowtorch*


*Starts heating the plate around Choq's 'kiwis'*
*punches mac in the face, before hurridly trying to escape armour*
*jumps in moat*

*sits on pillows, munching chocolate covered popcorn*
Almost as good as the previous channel...

*Looks into Rejected Royalty. Is frightened to his very soul at what he sees.*

*sits on pillows, munching chocolate covered popcorn*
Almost as good as the previous channel...

*Curls up next to TCG. Rests his head on her pillows. Kisses her and feels the pain of unhappy endings washed from his mind.* Thank Goddess for new beginnings.

*sits on pillows, munching chocolate covered popcorn*
Almost as good as the previous channel...

*Swoons from the punch and falls, overdramatically, onto the pillows next to CG*

You know, you have the most beautiful eyes.

*Looks into Rejected Royalty. Is frightened to his very soul at what he sees.*


Be afraid......be very afraid........





Oh, free nuts!

*sits on pillows, munching chocolate covered popcorn*
Almost as good as the previous channel...

pushing off moat bottom, bounds in through the window right n top of her, soaking her, teeth neatly fitting around her shoulder oto bite her quite.... savagely, before bounding away once again*


*chuckles while running through hallways*
here mac mac mac

*Swoons from the punch and falls, overdramatically, onto the pillows next to CG*

You know, you have the most beautiful eyes.
*looks at choq in the moat and everyone else surrounding CG*

Meh. I'm gonna get wasted.

*steps over to fridge, proceeds to drain the contents, CFCs and all*

*Looks into Rejected Royalty. Is frightened to his very soul at what he sees.*

*Grabs Skinny and pulls him into the Castle*

Hey everybody, look who I found.

*looks at choq in the moat and everyone else surrounding CG*

Meh. I'm gonna get wasted.

*steps over to fridge, proceeds to drain the contents, CFCs and all*

*Rugby tackles Tribes to the floor*

*Starts fighting over the last of the precious beer*

-snip-

*steps over to fridge, proceeds to drain the contents, CFCs and all*
:eek: *faints*

*Grabs Skinny and pulls him into the Castle*

Hey everybody, look who I found.
*wakes up*
ohhh a new pet*
*faints*

*Briefly struggles*

Name, Rank and Number. Thats all you're getting out of me

*Struggles to swallow cyanide pill*

:eek: *faints*
Wuss.

*picks electric filaments out of his teeth*

*Rugby tackles Tribes to the floor*

*Starts fighting over the last of the precious beer*
*kicks Mac in the nuts*

Gerrof.

*Looks into Rejected Royalty. Is frightened to his very soul at what he sees.*


*walks in with a string of freshly harvested scrotums........one which still has a leg attached to it*


I dont see why everyone who drops by is so frightened :confused:


*licks blood from saber*

*walka in with a string of freshly harvested scrotums........onw which still has a leg attached to it*


I dont see why everyone who drops by is so frightened :confused:


*licks blood from saber*

*Ravages*

*Takes another deep breath*

*Ravages again*

*Hands a bouqet of blood red roses*

*walks in with a string of freshly harvested scrotums........onw which still has a leg attached to it*


I dont see why everyone who drops by is so frightened :confused:


*licks blood from saber*

*pounces on her from across castle, molesting her nearly to death*
you ever leave us unsupervised again and errmmm i wont story you no more :p so there

*Stops struggling when he realises no-one is paying him any attention*

*Coughs politely*

*walks in with a string of freshly harvested scrotums........one which still has a leg attached to it*


I dont see why everyone who drops by is so frightened :confused:


*licks blood from saber*

It's the decor. Red with stone just doesn't work I tell you. Maybe some nice oche somewhere........

*Ravages*

*Takes another deep breath*

*Ravages again*

*Hands a bouqet of blood red roses*

MAC! *GETS RAVAGED*

aww....my favorite! *gives him deep long steamy Maximum kiss*

YUM!

Wow...we really have three reject threads running all at once?

*impressed*

MAC! *GETS RAVAGED*

aww....my favorite! *gives him deep long steamy Maximum kiss*

YUM!

*Faints*

Wow...we really have three reject threads running all at once?

*impressed*
*molests*

*Stops struggling when he realises no-one is paying him any attention*

*Coughs politely*
*ignores skinny*

*ignores him some more*

*...*

*randomly smacks him in the mouth, then kneels over him, producing a 6" filleting blade*

<crazy look in his eye> You want attention? YOU WANT ATTENTION! I'LL GIVE YOU ATTENTION!!

*door closes on the interrogation room*

*low, visceral sounds can be heard for the next half hour*

*molests*

*Kicks in the groin*

*molests*
Nonono, not like that. Like this...

*demonstrates*

*Staggers out of the torture room, walking awkwardly*

No-one ask what happened.

Ever.

Now, wheres the beer?

*pounces on her from across castle, molesting her nearly to death*
you ever leave us unsupervised again and errmmm i wont story you no more :p so there


i like to watch you guys play from afar. Maybe I've been filming this whole exchange.....


maybe I;ve been filming ........other stuff.

Nonono, not like that. Like this...

*demonstrates*


ohhhh *moans*
i need another lesson i think to do it right

ohhhh *moans*
i need another lesson i think to do it right

*Pulls on latex gloves*

Ok, like this

*Demonstrates*

Nonono, not like that. Like this...

*demonstrates*

*Takes notes*
Woa
*Gets another notepad after filling one*

*Pulls on latex gloves*

Ok, like this

*Demonstrates*
lol yummy

*Pulls on latex gloves*

Ok, like this

*Demonstrates*

*Takes more notes*
*Pauses....looks at notes.......burns book, buries it and salts the ground*

*ignores skinny*

*ignores him some more*

*...*

*randomly smacks him in the mouth, then kneels over him, producing a 6" filleting blade*

<crazy look in his eye> You want attention? YOU WANT ATTENTION! I'LL GIVE YOU ATTENTION!!

*door closes on the interrogation room*

*low, visceral sounds can be heard for the next half hour*

OOC: That's a lot of pressure, you pecker!

Greetings, all! :D

*rolls in 2 kegs of Guinness*

Anyone thirsty?

*Note to self: Don't say it, don't say it, don't say it*

Yeah baby, but not for Guiness ;)

*To self: Idiot*

Greetings, all! :D
Wassup Gene. How doth it hang?

OOC: That's a lot of pressure, you pecker!
For more information on tribal torture techniques, read "The TToL's guide to Torture - Edition 1: Knives, truncheons and electroshock therapy"

*nods knowingly*

*rolls in 2 kegs of Guinness*

Anyone thirsty?
meeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee
*steals keg grabs mac and tribe runs to other room*

For more information on tribal torture techniques, read "The TToL's guide to Torture - Edition 1: Knives, truncheons and electroshock therapy"

*nods knowingly*

"Now available from all good bookshops at the low, low price of just $49.99"

Wassup Gene. How doth it hang?
Nuthin' much. Is peech around?

Nuthin' much. Is peech around?


*walks up behind gene and yells BOO!*

indeed she is....... ;)

For more information on tribal torture techniques, read "The TToL's guide to Torture - Edition 1: Knives, truncheons and electroshock therapy"

*nods knowingly*

1300 for the second time today. WEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!! *Streaks through thread with naught on but 1300 in permanant marker on his buttocks*

1300 for the second time today. WEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!! *Streaks through thread with naught on but 1300 in permanant marker on his buttocks*
For every post you have ever posted, Legless Pirates has posted more than 10. Think about it.

*feels insignificant*

Oh wait, I was thinking about the universe and my position in/effect on it.

*sacrifices 3 virgin boars in honor of Jocs post count*



and here you can take this cheerleader back to your chambers as a bonus prize

*walks up behind gene and yells BOO!*

indeed she is....... ;)
:eek:

...

:D

:fluffle:

For every post you have ever posted, Legless Pirates has posted more than 10. Think about it.

*feels insignificant*

Oh wait, I was thinking about the universe and my position in/effect on it.


which proves once and for all size doesnt matter....

*looks at Tribes post count*

yummmy....

*takes off her "guys with big post counts do it better'' t -shirt*

which proves once and for all size doesnt matter....

*looks at Tribes post count*

yummmy....

*takes off her "guys with big post counts do it better'' t -shirt*

*Thinks about shaving his head so she'll take off the "guys with blonde hair do it better pants" leaving her naked. Decides there are easier ways*

which proves once and for all size doesnt matter....

*looks at Tribes post count*

yummmy....

*takes off her "guys with big post counts do it better'' t -shirt*
*puts on his "Look Peech, look at meee!!" distracting T-shirt to get Peech's full attention*

*strips*

Now, if you'll just follow me into this bed-chamber...

*Thinks about shaving his head so she'll take off the "guys with blonde hair do it better pants" leaving her naked. Decides there are easier ways*

ooc: lol....


*carves "Joc" on her inner thigh*

blonde people rule ;)

*puts on his "Look Peech, look at meee!!" distracting T-shirt to get Peech's full attention*

*strips*

Now, if you'll just follow me into this bed-chamber...

*Trips Tribes* No, she's mine. I have a smaller post-count than he does. *lifts eyebrow* Huh? Huh?

*puts on his "Look Peech, look at meee!!" distracting T-shirt to get Peech's full attention*

*strips*

Now, if you'll just follow me into this bed-chamber...


you had me at "look"

*Lays a trail of blood red roses to detour Peech away from Tribes, leading to a luxurious four-poster bed, covered in rose petals*

you had me at "look"
Really? I didn't even notice that little event. Ah well.

*has peech...walk with him towards the chamber*

Now, for the reason I asked for peech.

*Hands peech a piece of paper*

OOC: It's a telegram, so check your nation. ;)

I think to be fair....we should play a game of "Naughty Clue" since theres only one of me and two of you. Normally I'd be hanging a sign on the castle door that says 'If the Kazoo is a rockin' .....dont come a knockin'".......


but I sprained my jaw earlier on a scrotum removal and I just couldnt give you boys 100%.


hmmm.....could it be professor plum in the dungeon with a vibrator?

*Lays a trail of blood red roses to detour Peech away from Tribes, leading to a luxurious four-poster bed, covered in rose petals*
*lays a trail of peasant blood, interspersed with scrotums, away from Mac*

Which will work? Flowers or sacs?



*watches a peech follows flowers*

Bugge-*gets hit by m0d stones, leaving imprints on tribes' skin that read "I'm watching you all"*

sacs.........or flowers?

sigh.....whats a Peech to do?

sacs.........or flowers?

sigh.....whats a Peech to do?

*Ties flowers to scrotems and decorates the castle*
"Changing rooms" has got nothing on this....

Now, for the reason I asked for peech.

*Hands peech a piece of paper*

OOC: It's a telegram, so check your nation. ;)


oh right.....my poor neglected nation........its probably been taken over by a bunch of surfers or something by now.


and i replied Geno :D

*Ties flowers to scrotems and decorates the castle*
"Changing rooms" has got nothing on this....


LOL.........indeed they dont!

ha that was funny

*admires the new decor*

*Ties flowers to scrotems and decorates the castle*
"Changing rooms" has got nothing on this....
Damn you, Staggering Drunks, you damn dirty ape!

*shakes fist at statue of liberty, mysteriously projecting out of the side of the wall*

I now know what michael jackson was singing about in thriller. It wasn't zombies. It was thread killer. :rolleyes:

*gets naked, attempts to attract attention*

Look at me, woo woo!!

Wo- ah, screw it.

*slumps on a bed with a beer*

Damn you, Staggering Drunks, you damn dirty ape!

*shakes fist at statue of liberty, mysteriously projecting out of the side of the wall*

Oh yes! We can have those too!
*Leads a herd of damn dirty apes through castle. Smacks one's hand as it reaches for a scrotum*
BAD monkey

I now know what michael jackson was singing about in thriller. It wasn't zombies. It was thread killer. :rolleyes:

*gets naked, attempts to attract attention*

Look at me, woo woo!!

Wo- ah, screw it.

*slumps on a bet with a beer*


*Flicks naked Tribes with a wet towel as he dances*

I now know what michael jackson was singing about in thriller. It wasn't zombies. It was thread killer. :rolleyes:

*gets naked, attempts to attract attention*

Look at me, woo woo!!

Wo- ah, screw it.

*slumps on a bet with a beer*


*joins Tribes with a bottle of tequila*

here lets see whats on........football.....no.....House and Garden TV...NO.......*stops on the Discovery Health Channel....*

My God they are doing a story on castration! *stares and drools*

*Flicks naked Tribes with a wet towel as he dances*
*looks at Mac sternly*

You could have my eye out with that towel, you know they are unpredictable.

*hands mac a proper whip from a rack nearby*

If you're going to do any whipping, do it with this.

*joins Tribes with a bottle of tequila*

here lets see whats on........football.....no.....House and Garden TV...NO.......*stops on the Discovery Health Channel....*

My God they are doing a story on castration! *stares and drools*
*sits down with Peech and watches*

*Peech keeps pointing out every discrepancy in the operation*

Bloody know it alls :p :fluffle:

oh right.....my poor neglected nation........its probably been taken over by a bunch of surfers or something by now.


and i replied Geno :D
Good. replied to that one.

Now....

*frenches you, not caring who's around us* :fluffle: :D

*sits down with Peech and watches*

*Peech keeps pointing out every discrepancy in the operation*

Bloody know it alls :p :fluffle:


Well for Goddess sake........he's wearing protective gloves! I cant believe they let wuss's like that perform surgery.

*looks at her blood stained hands with pride*

*Stands with whip in one hand and a rose in the other, looking downhearted*

*Packs sword, spare kilt, and some food into a bag, then sets off north, towards the mountains and snow*

Good. replied to that one.

Now....

*frenches you, not caring who's around us* :fluffle: :D


*grabs Gene's ass then ties his underwear in a bow*

thats considered foreplay in some cultures you know

*Stands with whip in one hand and a rose in the other, looking downhearted*

*Packs sword, spare kilt, and some food into a bag, then sets off north, towards the mountains and snow*


*throws a dagger, pinning Mac to the wall*

where do you think youre going? and what are you doing with one of my roses :eek:

Well for Goddess sake........he's wearing protective gloves! I cant believe they let wuss's like that perform surgery.

*looks at her blood stained hands with pride*
I know, Peech, it's OK to be angry...the guy is a Jackass. Everyone knows that castration is 90% style, 10% accuracy. How could you possibly hope to be stylish wearing a surgical gown - it's like a giant condom with arm holes.

*Stands with whip in one hand and a rose in the other, looking downhearted*

*Packs sword, spare kilt, and some food into a bag, then sets off north, towards the mountains and snow*
Mac, wait! Wait!

*runs up to Mac*

*hands him a list*

I need *points* this, *points* this and *points* this. Not so much *points* this, I can get that elsewhere, but definitely the yeti flesh. OK?

*Pins rose to the wall with dagger, takes list, and sets off towards the mountains to hunt yeti for Tribes*

I know, Peech, it's OK to be angry...the guy is a Jackass. Everyone knows that castration is 90% style, 10% accuracy. How could you possibly hope to be stylish wearing a surgical gown - it's like a giant condom with arm holes.





and look- he is wearing shower caps over his shoes, and is wearing safety goggles :rolleyes: ...... I should just open a clinic here in the castle. Give them a free piercing of their choice with each procedure.......*mulls it over*


yeti flesh! I have a recipe that calls for a pound of that........get extra Mac!

*Walks in carrying a giant poster of the Ten Commandments of Beerdom:

1. Thou shalt drink no budweiser, carling, or any other foul excuse for malt brews. Neither shalt thou recreate these beers, for experimental purposes or otherwise.

2. Thou shalt destroy every sample of said fake beers, except those that reside within my good buddy Joc here.

3. Thou shalt not take the name of Guinness in vain - even Guinness extra cold. OK, so a little 'Extra cold' blasphemy wouldn't go a miss...but not too much - we don't want to damage the reputation of the holy black brew.

4. Thou shalt NEVER eat pretzels with any brew. It is peanuts or nothing. If the world suddenly runs out of peanuts, then suffer for not better handling your resources, you sad lot.

5. Thou shalt rub lotions and oils on the skins of us vending machines, paying particular attention to the area right under the selection buttons. Aaaaaah, yeah, right there!

6. Thou shalt have no idol before us. Take this to mean, get that crude and hideous show American Idol off the telly.

7. Thou shalt celebrate every monday, thursday and saturday with 'Microbrewery Day' where thou shalt tasteth of the latest Microbrewery ale and giveth to thy sacred dispensers, lest we judge the beer.

8. Thou shalt createth a free hangover cure, and once created thou shalt circulate it for evermore.

9. Thou shalt indulge in the Holy 'Pub Lunch' on Sunday's, preferrably at a good steak and ale house.

10. Thou shalt never be the first to fall asleep on the Sacred Party, to be held every thursday from 10PM until everyone passes out at Murphy's on the corner of Main and First, lest ye have your leg hairs burned and the word balls drawn on your forehead in permanent marker.

Take these commandments and use them to create a more perfect world, where dogs and cats play in a way that scares the mice away, where we long for darkness so we may better appreciate the light and where large-breasted and topless women are constantly prostrate before Tribes and myself as we are your one and only source of enlightment./poster

Smiles as he hanges it up*

*points to 10 commandments*

Oh look! What geniuses could have come up with such rules? I wonder...

*looks about, whstling innocently*

lol Joc.....but god Guinness is vile.

*points to 10 commandments*

Oh look! What geniuses could have come up with such rules? I wonder...

*looks about, whstling innocently*

which is why you two are so irresistible........damn brainy, witty blokes.

*curses all the temptation........then has another shot of tequila*

anyone have a Mexican hat?

lol Joc.....but god Guinness is vile.

How do you just ignore the Third Commandment? You're so lucky you have no scrotum or you'd certainly be scrotumless now, or something like that.

EDIT: Tribes, what ever happened to our large-breasted topless women? I was kind of liking being a vending machine.

which is why you two are so irresistible........damn brainy, witty blokes.

*curses all the temptation........then has another shot of tequila*

anyone have a Mexican hat?
I have a tequila bottle with a plastic mexican hat (i.e. the tequila bottle is wearing the hat) - how about that?

*joins in the tequila shots, pouring salt on Peech and licking it all before biting in her lime*

I have a tequila bottle with a plastic mexican hat (i.e. the tequila bottle is wearing the hat) - how about that?


well , that wont make for much of a Mexican hat dance......but I can manage.


Ole'!

I'm only here for a minute, but I couldnt resist satisfying my sweet tooth with my favorite woman.....

*ravages TCG*

"BUUURRRRPPP!"

Gosh I shouldnt eat so fast.....excuse me

I'm only here for a minute, but I couldnt resist satisfying my sweet tooth with my favorite woman.....

*ravages TCG*

"BUUURRRRPPP!"

Gosh I shouldnt eat so fast.....excuse meMerower...
[shame on you... Chocolate must be savored... eaten slowly and delicatly sucked... anything else is an insult to Chocolate] :(

Merower...
[shame on you... Chocolate must be savored... eaten slowly and delicatly sucked... anything else is an insult to Chocolate] :(

quiet you.........

*throws Nekone a ball of catnip*

quiet you.........

*throws Nekone a ball of catnip*Mew?
[do I lie?]

*pounces on Catnip*

MEOW! :eek: :D

Mew?
[do I lie?]

*pounces on Catnip*

MEOW! :eek: :D


no you speak the truth......and normally I would take my sweet time with TCG.......we have to squeeze in quickies once in a while though.

*puts a bowl of milk out *

no you speak the truth......and normally I would take my sweet time with TCG.......we have to squeeze in quickies once in a while though.

*puts a bowl of milk out *
I'm all for quickies with you, my lover
*frenchkisses her favorite Peech*

no you speak the truth......and normally I would take my sweet time with TCG.......we have to squeeze in quickies once in a while though.

*puts a bowl of milk out *Mefff
[unintelligible since his face is buried in the ball of catnip]

Mefff
[unintelligible since his face is buried in the ball of catnip]

*watches Nekone and preys on him. As soon as his attention is enraptured by the catnip, she pounces and licks his head*

*watches Nekone and preys on him. As soon as his attention is enraptured by the catnip, she pounces and licks his head* :eek: merrower?? :p
[huh? wozzat... oh.. Hi!]

*attempts to lick nose, but misses by 1 inch... plastering a kiss on the lips.*

:eek: merrower?? :p
[huh? wozzat... oh.. Hi!]

*attempts to lick nose, but misses by 1 inch... plastering a kiss on the lips.*

*giggles*
Your nose is wet
*licks him again*
*coughs up a fur ball*

*giggles*
Your nose is wet
*licks him again*
*coughs up a fur ball*Merrower...
[wow.. I can do that too!]

*tries to cough up a furball... but fails.*

*puzzled look on his face* mew
[well I did before]

Merrower...
[wow.. I can do that too!]

*tries to cough up a furball... but fails.*

*puzzled look on his face* mew
[well I did before]

*chuckles*
With all the licking i've been doing, i've probably eaten most of your loose fur... wouldn't be too worried, if i were you...


OOC out of NS but you can reach me by email tonight

finally, getting in while this is still somewhat small.

*Ladies and Gentlemen. Pray, lend me your ears*

A man steps out into the light. he is dressed in a classic tuxedo. Black jacket, black plants, black shirt, red vest and tie. Point-tipped oxfor shoes

*Ladies and Gentlemen, please, allow me to extend my most curtious invitation to join us in the bar. It is now open for cocktails, beers, wines, anything that strikes your fancy*

The man grins rougishly

"The bar tender is off limits until his shift is over"


EDIT: my title should still be: BLARGistania - his most high and exaulted lord of the bar and all things alcoholic. Makes a killer sex on the beach, has killer sex, well, you get the idea.

finally, getting in while this is still somewhat small.

*Ladies and Gentlemen. Pray, lend me your ears*

A man steps out into the light. he is dressed in a classic tuxedo. Black jacket, black plants, black shirt, red vest and tie. Point-tipped oxfor shoes

*Ladies and Gentlemen, please, allow me to extend my most curtious invitation to join us in the bar. It is now open for cocktails, beers, wines, anything that strikes your fancy*

The man grins rougishly

"The bar tender is off limits until his shift is over"


EDIT: my title should still be: BLARGistania - his most high and exaulted lord of the bar and all things alcoholic. Makes a killer sex on the beach, has killer sex, well, you get the idea.
MEw!
[shounds good... Letsh go]

*picsk up bag of Catnip and staggers in the general direction of the bar.*

The man in the Tuxedo disappears into the room, another man is standing behind the bar. He is wearing come classy black pants with a tuxedo shirt and an unbuttoned tuxedo vest. Hair of middling length is thrown to one side in a shaggy version of the comb-over (except with a full head of hair). The bartender grins

Welcome ladies and gentlemen, welcome to the bar. *winks* may I take your order?

Welcome ladies and gentlemen, welcome to the bar. *winks* may I take your order?
*Leaps up to the bar... and places the catnip bag on the side.*
Mew
[Saucer of Milk please.]

Nekooooone...

*Grins, holding a large angry german shepherd on a leash.*

Nekooooone...

*Grins, holding a large angry german shepherd on a leash.**blinks in a Catnip induced haze...*

Merr?
[ohhh a funny looking cat...]

I brought you a friend, nekone. His name is Duko.

*Snarling*

I brought you a friend, nekone. His name is Duko.

*Snarling*Mew...
[Hewo Duwo...]

Duko likes kitties.

*unclips leash. Duko tears off towards the bar in attack-mode, then skids to a stop and stares intently*

He just gets a little excited sometimes.

Duko likes kitties.

*unclips leash. Duko tears off towards the bar in attack-mode, then skids to a stop and stares intently*

He just gets a little excited sometimes. :D
*Nekone creeps to the edge of the bar... extends his nose to sniff Duko... overreaches and falls off... onto the stool... then bounces to the floor...*

Meerrrr :D
[He, he, he... I can see up your nose Duko...]

*Duko chuffs and nudges the fallen feline*

*Duko chuffs and nudges the fallen feline**Nekone wraps his paws around Duko's snout... and gives Duko and Lick.*

Mew
[he's a nice doggie Gael]

ooc: you the same person in PC or human here?

OOC: Gael in PC is a character. And she stays there.

IC: Yes. He used to be a patrol dog.

*Duko shakes the cat off and tackles him*

Yes. He used to be a patrol dog.

*Duko shakes the cat off and tackles him*
*after a bit of roughshod... Duko looks around while nekone is hugging tightly on Duko's back.*
Meow.
[he likes to play doesn't he.]

Very much.

*Duko looks around, utterly confused.*

Very much.

*Duko looks around, utterly confused.*Mew
[Nice doggie...]
*Rubs head against Duko's fur.*

*Duko looks up, expecting to find a person petting him. More confusion.*

I think Duko needs more beer.

*Duko looks up, expecting to find a person petting him. More confusion.*

I think Duko needs more beer.
Mew...
[the bartender was suppose to bring me some milk.... I guess he's milking the cow now..]

*Hops to the stool, then back on the bartop.*

Meor...
[maybe there's some food for Duko back here.]

*Duko follows, but knocks the stool over while trying to jump on it.*

*Duko follows, but knocks the stool over while trying to jump on it.*
Mew
[Careful Duko... ]

*sniffs a bowl of Pretzels*

*Duko finds a forgotten keg of Guinness, chews on the tap*

*Duko finds a forgotten keg of Guinness, chews on the tap*OOC: I have some friends who would like Duko just by his taste in Beer... :D

*continues looking for sutable food for him and Duko...*

*Duko begins bonging the entire keg*

*Duko begins bonging the entire keg*OOC: ok, strange pic just popped into my head when I read that... :D

IC: *Nekone finds a bag of Beef Jerky behind the bar... begins pondering how to open it*

*Duko woofs triumphantly and bounds to the bar like a drunken deer*

*a small furry (and suds crowned) head pokes up with a large bag of Jerky*
Merfff?
[err... Gael.. can you open this please?]

Yes. Duko, fetch.

*Duko leaps up and grabs the bag in his teeth, popping it and sending bits of jerky all over the place*

Yes. Duko, fetch.

*Duko leaps up and grabs the bag in his teeth, popping it and sending bits of jerky all over the place*
*Leaps up... snags a piece and slides the length of the bar...*
Prrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr
[mmmmmmmmm]

*Duko pees on Tribes' pillow.*

*Duko pees on Tribes' pillow.**Picks up Catnip ball...*
*Sees what Duko as done...*

:D

*Duko proceeds to continue marking territory..*

*Duko proceeds to continue marking territory..* :eek: *Nekone rushes forwards and protects Peechlands and TCG's pillows and cushions...*

Mrrrrrr :(
[mark the others but spare these... Pweeese!]

Duko doesn't like girls' rooms. Dunno why.

Duko doesn't like girls' rooms. Dunno why.
Mew?
[Trauma from when he was a Puppy?]

No, it's prolly my fault actually..

*Grins, remembering the iron maiden incident..*

OOC: time for me to go... so...

IC: *Nekone curls up around the Catnip ball on TCG's Pillows.*

*Sneaks in, superfreezes TCG's and Peech's pillows*

*Snickers as he tiptoes out*

:D

The bartender saunters back in
Sorry about the wait, the cows were out of milk and I had to go the store.

*one saucer of milk slides across the bar*

"And a raw steak for the delightful puppy, I would presume?"

[snip]
EDIT: my title should still be: BLARGistania - his most high and exaulted lord of the bar and all things alcoholic. Makes a killer sex on the beach, has killer sex, well, you get the idea.

You hadn't been around so i took it off...but as the 1st post says, you should really TG me so i don't forget.

You hadn't been around so i took it off...but as the 1st post says, you should really TG me so i don't forget.

158 posts. How am I supposed to read that? What have you guys been doing?

158 posts. How am I supposed to read that? What have you guys been doing?

*innocent smile*
Playing...
*turns into wicked grin*

*innocent smile*
Playing...
*turns into wicked grin*

I'm caught up and you lie. You weren't even here.

I'm caught up and you lie. You weren't even here.

Oh, but i was playing... just not here
*wicked grin*

Oh, but i was playing... just not here
*wicked grin*

And, what, praytell, does that have to do with the question I originally asked?

And, what, praytell, does that have to do with the question I originally asked?

Why, Sir Joc, please restrain yourself. I was answering your question. I am, afterall, a Goddess, and although not physically in this place, I was keeping an ever-watchful eye, being attentive to the needs of my fellow castlemates.

Why, Sir Joc, please restrain yourself. I was answering your question. I am, afterall, a Goddess, and although not physically in this place, I was keeping an ever-watchful eye, being attentive to the needs of my fellow castlemates.

One, I'd rather you restrain me. Two, that's an excellent answer and does, in fact, address the question. *grins*

One, I'd rather you restrain me. Two, that's an excellent answer and does, in fact, address the question. *grins*

*grins*
Restraints are in the dungeon. Care to accompany me for a stroll?

*grins*
Restraints are in the dungeon. Care to accompany me for a stroll?

I'd accompany you anywhere *starts to sing* Someday baby you'll accompany me *follows*

*Grabs Beer and Claymore from Handy Sword-Rack. Sits down with a nervous smile and takes quick, nervous sips from said beer. Looks around wildly*

*Grabs Beer and Claymore from Handy Sword-Rack. Sits down with a nervous smile and takes quick, nervous sips from said beer. Looks around wildly*

OOC: do you have a title yet?

OOC: Title?

How about 'Scared and Naive Teenager who should never have entered'?

Nah, that sucks. I'm open to suggestions, but nothing else...

OOC: Title?

How about 'Scared and Naive Teenager who should never have entered'?

Nah, that sucks. I'm open to suggestions, but nothing else...

You do know this place gets... raunchy, right?

See first post for instruction.

I'd accompany you anywhere *starts to sing* Someday baby you'll accompany me *follows*

*raised eyebrow*
How do you figure that?
*goes down the stairs to dungeon*

OOC: I had an idea, but I was a little shocked by it all. Meh, I'm over 18, and I can leave at any time...

*Looks around at chains and various implemements*

...Hopefully...

OOC: I had an idea, but I was a little shocked by it all. Meh, I'm over 18, and I can leave at any time...

*Looks around at chains and various implemements*

...Hopefully...

So, run to the first post, read it and get back to me
*sweet smile with mischievous eyes*

Hmmmm....

'Skinny87 - Uber-Geek - A Geek with knowledge of many things including D&D - Will roll your dice and then 'Roll Your Dice'

Whaddya think?

*raised eyebrow*
How do you figure that?
*goes down the stairs to dungeon*

*ignores the questions, figuring she'll get that he's singing if he just continues to do so and tries not to take it too hard that she couldn't tell he was just singing right away. Continues to follow her*

A gypsey wind is blowin warm tonight
the sky is starlit and the time is right
and still your tellin me you have to go
before you leave there's somethin you should know

yeah
something you should know babe

I've seen you smilin in the summer sun
I've seen your long hair flyin when you run
i've made my mind up that its meant to be
someday lady you'll accomp'ny me

someday lady you'll acomp'ny me
out where rivers meet the soundin sea
your high above now your wild and free
oh but someday lady you'll accomp'ny me
someday lady you'll accomp'ny me yeah

ohh

Some people say that love's a losin game
you start with fire but you lose the flame.
the ashes smolder but the warmths soon gone
you end cold and loneley own your own

Ill take my chances babe i'll risk it all
i'll win your love or i'll take the fall
ive made my mind up girl its meant to be,
someday lady you'll accomp'ny me

someday lady you'll acomp'ny me
it's written down somewhere its got to be
your high above flyin wild and free
oh but someday lady you'll accomp'ny me
someday lady you'll accomp'ny me yeah

someday lady you'll acomp'ny me
out where rivers meet the soundin sea
i feel it in my soul its meat to be
oh someday lady you'll accomp'ny me
someday lady you'll accomp'ny me yeah

you will acompany me
ohh
yeah

i know yuu will a-comp'ny me yeah
ahh
somday lady
ohh
somday lady
your gonna comp'ny me
your gonna walk with me and talk with me
yeah
ohh gonna comp'ny me
gonna comp'ny me yeah
someday

Hmmmm....

'Skinny87 - Uber-Geek - A Geek with knowledge of many things including D&D - Will roll your dice and then 'Roll Your Dice'

Whaddya think?

We don't presently have a uber geek.. *ponders* sold.

You play D&D? i haven't played in a while, but i have been dying to play again... *remembers good ol' days fondly*. I also play video games, and fantasy games online...
*wicked grin*

*ignores the questions, figuring she'll get that he's singing if he just continues to do so and tries not to take it too hard that she couldn't tell he was just singing right away. Continues to follow her*
<snip>


The choice of song is always telling...

*she opens the dungeon door*
Please, go right in

Yes, I like all of them, particularly online games, but MMORPG's arent really my cup of tea. I enjoy D&D, even though my skills are...lacking to put it nicely.

Yes, I like all of them, particularly online games, but MMORPG's arent really my cup of tea. I enjoy D&D, even though my skills are...lacking to put it nicely.

Well... well, well, well *rubs hands together*

Yes, I like all of them, particularly online games, but MMORPG's arent really my cup of tea. I enjoy D&D, even though my skills are...lacking to put it nicely.

I always liked the dungeons better than the dragons *winks* I'm much more of a console game player myself. That's where online gaming is going.

*The air suddenly turns thick as pudding, swirling through it comes black mists filled with eerie keening, apaprently a womans voice singing a dirge to her love, accompanied by bag pipes, a man steps through the mist, shrouded in shadow, an unfelt wind rises around him tearing at his clothing, lightenings strinking him wildly, then arcing through the castle. A deep warm voice floats ahead of him " greetings my goddess, my castle mates ' a quick bow follows, as the shadows around him explode in a radiant light, stepping forward smoothly encased in a brilliant golden radiance, choqulya leans forward to kiss cg fully on the mouth, with a quick kiss for everyone else in the room, settling by cg, the nimbus fading*

I always liked the dungeons better than the dragons *winks* I'm much more of a console game player myself. That's where online gaming is going.

Then why don't we strap you in this contraption, humm?
*she is pointing to the rack, a dreamy expression on her face*

Then why don't we strap you in this contraption, humm?
*she is pointing to the rack, a dreamy expression on her face*

*he follows, feeling somehow pressed forward by an unseen force, simply obeying her whims. He settles into the "contraption"*

*The air suddenly turns thick as pudding, swirling through it comes black mists filled with eerie keening, apaprently a womans voice singing a dirge to her love, accompanied by bag pipes, a man steps through the mist, shrouded in shadow, an unfelt wind rises around him tearing at his clothing, lightenings strinking him wildly, then arcing through the castle. A deep warm voice floats ahead of him " greetings my goddess, my castle mates ' a quick bow follows, as the shadows around him explode in a radiant light, stepping forward smoothly encased in a brilliant golden radiance, choqulya leans forward to kiss cg fully on the mouth, with a quick kiss for everyone else in the room, settling by cg, the nimbus fading*

*she feels his presence even before he starts to coalesce. and she shivers when the voice and the pipes sing of love. she has been wondering where he was all morning. his kiss is soft and demanding. she opens her eyes, dazed*

*rides through the room on a donkey. Dismounts, then tells the donkey it has to go on it's government officiated 1 hour lunchbreak, and it's only to work 'til 3 today because of the full flexi-time quota it's covered this week*

What? It happens on blackpool beach.

*she feels his presence even before he starts to coalesce. and she shivers when the voice and the pipes sing of love. she has been wondering where he was all morning. his kiss is soft and demanding. she opens her eyes, dazed*
ello love

*he follows, feeling somehow pressed forward by an unseen force, simply obeying her whims. He settles into the "contraption"*

*smiles sweetly and as he lies on the table, she licks his ankles and wirsts and straps him in, careful to bind him tightly.*

*she goes to the tool rack and retrieves a small knife, and calls forth her whip, encircling it around her waist*

Now then... how do you like it?

ello love

Missed you, mon cher.
*looks at Joc the rack*
Care to join me?
*licks his neck*

*smiles sweetly and as he lies on the table, she licks his ankles and wirsts and straps him in, careful to bind him tightly.*

*she goes to the tool rack and retrieves a small knife, and calls forth her whip, encircling it around her waist*

Now then... how do you like it?

*squints, says quietly* rough *grimaces*

*squints, says quietly* rough *grimaces*

*she goes to the wheel and turns it twice, stretching Joc to a comfortable position... for her anyway... and gives him a lash of her whip across the chest*


ooc; back in 10 minutes

Missed you, mon cher.
*looks at Joc the rack*
Care to join me?
*licks his neck*
*sits at her feet flipping a knife, watching*

*she goes to the wheel and turns it twice, stretching Joc to a comfortable position... for her anyway... and gives him a lash of her whip across the chest*


ooc; back in 10 minutes

Is that all you got? *laughs*

Is that all you got? *laughs*
*barely looking up, tribes throws a 1.5 litre glass bottle of grotsch to Joc, smacking him square in the crotch*

She shall finish you when she is good and ready. Do not try her patience or you shall be branded. See - *drops trousers and shows the CG brand mark on his...inner thigh*

Is that all you got? *laughs*
*shovs funnel; in his mouth, pouring in shitty american beer ..err budweiser*

*barely looking up, tribes throws a 1.5 litre glass bottle of grotsch to Joc, smacking him square in the crotch*

She shall finish you when she is good and ready. Do not try her patience or you shall be branded. See - *drops trousers and shows the CG brand mark on his...inner thigh*

I was going to do that anyway, Tribes.
*she frenchkisses Tribes quite thoroughly*
You really should practice your... *licks her lips* languages more often

*shovs funnel; in his mouth, pouring in shitty american beer ..err budweiser*

*eyes fluttering*
A man after mine own heart.
*frenchkisses Choq*
you're getting better at that

I was going to do that anyway, Tribes.
*she frenchkisses Tribes quite thoroughly*
You really should practice your... *licks her lips* languages more often
*tries to talk*

*fails, due to scary-good frenchkissing of CG*

hseaakmm. Shhmoohr...grggr! ;)

*she goes to the wheel and turns it twice more, faintly feeling the strain on Joc's limbs. a slow smile spreads across her face*

Now, shall we try that again?
*whips his chest with force thre times, then licks her whip of blood*

ooc: did anything become of the politics thing?

*she goes to the wheel and turns it twice more, faintly feeling the strain on Joc's limbs. a slow smile spreads across her face*

Now, shall we try that again?
*whips his chest with force thre times, then licks her whip of blood*
hands her some budweiser *giggles at joc*
*curls up at her feet smiling and nuzzling her ankles*

ooc: did anything become of the politics thing?

The Eternal Rebel Rejects Party
Motto: Fear the Kazoo

Edicts: err... Choq, what are the first 4 or 5 points? it's about kilts and bifurcated clothes being illegal... and a midget being death

then there is the obligatory scrotum harvesting and giving proper worship to the goddesses...

hands her some budweiser *giggles at joc*
*curls up at her feet smiling and nuzzling her ankles*

*licks his face and takes the beer and funnel*
You are such a good boy.
*she goes to Joc, pours some Bud on his wounds, then down his nose...*

*throws open castle door producing an ear piercing BOOM*



who ripped a hole in my Friday assless chaps???? :mad:

*points to her kneecap*

*throws open castle door producing an ear piercing BOOM*



who ripped a hole in my Friday assless chaps???? :mad:

*points to her kneecap*

*you hear her voice from somewhere down in the dungeons*
Down here, my lover. I may have the culprit...

*you hear her voice from somewhere down in the dungeons*
Down here, my lover. I may have the culprit...


*she leaps down the spiral staircase and sees Goddess having her way with someone........various instruments and devices are laid out......she sees fresh blood splattered on the wall*

hey its Friday the 13th........where did everyone go? this should be an extra chaotic day in the kazoo..........

*slays a peasant who was pretending to be Goth*

poser......

*she looks at Joc and his fresh wounds, struggling with the Bud in his nose. the dangles the can in one hand and gives him a few more lashes, on the chest, the arms, the legs, with a slow smile and smoldering eyes*

So it was Joc in the Library with the candlestick.........

no wait ........thats something else....



So it was Joc who put the hole in my chaps??!


*licks lips*

hey its Friday the 13th........where did everyone go? this should be an extra chaotic day in the kazoo..........

*slays a peasant who was pretending to be Goth*

poser......

They just all vanished... well, except for Joc, but i think his mind is on vacation... maybe i overdid the stretching?

So it was Joc in the Library with the candlestick.........

no wait ........thats something else....



So it was Joc who put the hole in my chaps??!


*licks lips*

Does it really matter? We can just pretend it was and... play
*vicious grin*

*Ahem*

Don't forget about lil ol' me ove here. I am the Uber-Geek, of course. Fancy a game?

*Ahem*

Don't forget about lil ol' me ove here. I am the Uber-Geek, of course. Fancy a game?


what can you play?

ohhhhhh cripe....I havent welcomed you to the Kazoo properly

*carves "Peech was here" on his forehead to show her affections*

welcome to the Kazoo.......

*french kisses him*

*Ahem*

Don't forget about lil ol' me ove here. I am the Uber-Geek, of course. Fancy a game?

I've added you to our exclusive club.
You may now proceed
Watch for his loaded dice

Believe me, its not only my dice that are loaded...

*Winks*

Believe me, its not only my dice that are loaded...

*Winks*

*frenchkisses him and slaps some chocolate sauce on his forehead*
You'll do just fine, Skinny

Believe me, its not only my dice that are loaded...

*Winks*


Ha! I like him already

*she goes back to Joc on the rack. She forcefully opens his mouth, puts the funnel in, clamps his nose, and pours Bud down his throat, then holds his mouth closed*

*she goes back to Joc on the rack. She forcefully opens his mouth, puts the funnel in, clamps his nose, and pours Bud down his throat, then holds his mouth closed*


*puts pretzels down the funnel.........not peanuts*

*puts pretzels down the funnel.........not peanuts*

*she looks up at her lover, her eyes wonderous*
You are so much better than i at this, my lover. I think i should start you a cult... and set up a devotional system.. just for you

*she looks up at her lover, her eyes wonderous*
You are so much better than i at this, my lover. I think i should start you a cult... and set up a devotional system.. just for you


no...i should set up one for you *kisses her deeply*


I am going to worship you for hours this weekend my sweet.....I will show you devotion.

no...i should set up one for you *kisses her deeply*


I am going to worship you for hours this weekend my sweet.....I will show you devotion.

*almost swoons, then reaches over the caresses her lover's glorious body, nibbling her throat*

Can we take pictures? Maybe I should ask¨Phil to join us?

*almost swoons, then reaches over the caresses her lover's glorious body, nibbling her throat*

Can we take pictures? Maybe I should ask¨Phil to join us?


absolutely.........and I will bring Chad

Believe me, its not only my dice that are loaded...

*Winks*

Hey Skinny
How about you give my willing servant here a few lashes... i'm..busy.

absolutely.........and I will bring Chad

*fans self and wets lips*
I like Chad...

*Repeatedly whipping Joc*

Eh? What should I be doing?

*fans self and wets lips*
I like Chad...


Chad is nice. Very nice. *licks TCG lips and then Chad*

*Repeatedly whipping Joc*

Eh? What should I be doing?

I think our young pup needs some instructions, Peech.

*she comes up close behind him, her hot breath on his neck. she takes his whip hand in hers*
This is how you do it, so not as to kill him too quickly.
*she guides his movement, in very long and controlled strokes, lashing Joc's body, her other hand moving to his hip... to stabilize him...*

Ah, i see

*Whips TCG gently with a whip*

Like this then?

Ah, i see

*Whips TCG gently with a whip*

Like this then?


*joins Skinny and Goddess.........assisting in his lessons.....she kisses Goddess, then Skinny, then presses her long, hard, cold, steel saber flat against his skin*


this not only inflicts pain you know?

Ah, i see

*Whips TCG gently with a whip*

Like this then?

*she grabs the whip in her hands forcefully and pulls it out of his graps. eyes flashing*
That is a privilege! No one uses the whip on me unless i say so!

*her eyes soften*
But you are new, so... i will let it pass...

*joins Skinny and Goddess.........assisting in his lessons.....she kisses Goddess, then Skinny, then presses her long, hard, cold, steel saber flat against his skin*


this not only inflicts pain you know?

*eyes stared dreamily into her memories*
Ah, it can provide much pleasure, when wielded by a master...

*eyes stared dreamily into her memories*
Ah, it can provide much pleasure, when wielded by a master...


Alas....we seem to be alone again. *looks around for Chad and Phil*
*licks Chad.....and then Goddess............and then introduces him to her*

Alas....we seem to be alone again. *looks around for Chad and Phil*
*licks Phil.....and then Goddess............and then introduces him to her*

*moans*
you always make nice.... introductions *shaking his hand, up and down*

*Grips blade ans runs hand up it slowly, carressing it, before moving closer*

My, what lovely equipment you have...

*Grips blade ans runs hand up it slowly, carressing it, before moving closer*

My, what lovely equipment you have...


*shivers*

I see you've done this before........

*offers him another one of her weapons to admire*

*moans*
you always make nice.... introductions *shaking his hand, up and down*


*she guides Chad along with the introduction....careful not to push too hard, but let the natural rhythm of meeting for the first time take place*

*shivers*

I see you've done this before........

*offers him another one of her weapons to admire*

My...your weapons are certainly beautiful. May I touch it?

My...your weapons are certainly beautiful. May I touch it?


Be careful.......dont hurt yourself. Let me handle that....

Of course, certain weapons can be deadly, can they not?

*Winks*

*she guides Chad along with the introduction....careful not to push too hard, but let the natural rhythm of meeting for the first time take place*

*moans, looking at Peecha n Skinny, her eyes glowing and a little smile on her lips*

Of course, certain weapons can be deadly, can they not?

*Winks*


I was hoping youd have some deadly weapons that I could touch..........we could....compare our weapons.

*moans, looking at Peecha n Skinny, her eyes glowing and a little smile on her lips*


*looks in on Goddess as Chad probes her for information. He is really into her....she seems breathless with each stroke of genius he displays. She feels a connection of some sort.......feels him on the inside of her. *


I knew they would like each other......

I was hoping youd have some deadly weapons that I could touch..........we could....compare our weapons.

Why, of course, how could I be so rude?

*Unsheaths his weapon*

*turns up, wearing a zebra skin for warmth*

*gets mobbed by animal rights activists, mainly beating up tribes with 'fur is murder' signs*

Ah, I am powerless to stop them. Possibly because one of them has my monkey nuts in a vice...*looks at leader of malicious roving AAAs*

...no! Don't crush them!

*small, crunching sound, followed by a whimper*

*turns up, wearing a zebra skin for warmth*

*gets mobbed by animal rights activists, mainly beating up tribes with 'fur is murder' signs*

Ah, I am powerless to stop them. Possibly because one of them has my monkey nuts in a vice...*looks at leader of malicious roving AAAs*

...no! Don't crush them!

*small, crunching sound, followed by a whimper*


*murders all the activists for even putting one smudge on Tribes*



heya handsome......*wraps up in his zebra skin*

*murders all the activists for even putting one smudge on Tribes*



heya handsome......*wraps up in his zebra skin*
*Peech discovers a whole new meaning to the phrase 'I'm naked under my clothes' as she wraps in tribes' only clothing, the zebra skin*

Evening Peech. As I'm sure you're aware, I'm always happy to seetoyou. :fluffle:

*Peech discovers a whole new meaning to the phrase 'I'm naked under my clothes' as she wraps in tribes' only clothing, the zebra skin*

Evening Peech. As I'm sure you're aware, I'm always happy to seetoyou. :fluffle:


And you know I am always happy to do anything you want see you.

Here....have this blanket made from the fuzz of a thousand peaches.

And you know I am always happy to do anything you want see you.

Here....have this blanket made from the fuzz of a thousand peaches.
*the gap in the first sentence pleases tribes immensely*

*takes blanket*

Why thank you peech. I'll be sure to wear it to the next slaughter. Now, about that gap... :p

*the gap in the first sentence pleases tribes immensely*

*takes blanket*

Why thank you peech. I'll be sure to wear it to the next slaughter. Now, about that gap... :p


I take my gaps very seriously.........

*hands Tribes a new beer called Gap*

how is it?