NationStates Jolt Archive

<<The television screen in Nikean homes is blessed with scenes of various football scenes, goals being scored, great saves, all faded into national flags of various countries. The words "Yentereleth Terestbeki" (Nikean for 'World Cup Report') appear at the end of the series of scenes

<<Two men are seated at a modern desk, while a wall with images of football players in various plays is behind them, these images are faded into the red of the wall. Plasma flat-screen are behind both men as they are seated at either end of the table which is shaped like the top of a trapezoid, only straightened out.>>

Istertel: Welcome to the World Cup Report, I'm Limenin Istertel, along with Rakemin Aseriuene, and this is a special edition of the Report tonight as we were pre-empted last night due to the Presidential address. However, we have summaries of both the last match with Tanah Burung, as well as today's home game against Trafari.

Aseriuene: Yes, after a nice performance on the road last night in a loss, today the Pandas squeak by with a win against the hapless Trafari squad who have impressed no one with their play thus far.

Istertel: Let's first look at the highlights from yesterday's match.

<<Various shots of players are shown.>>

Istertel: Rather tight contest in actuality, there was a bit of a breakdown in the first little while, that led to the only goal of the match.

Aseriuene: Yes, actually disappointing as there was little anyone could do about this goal. Great individual effort by Canabe Livit from the Crocs, and he slots it into the right corner.

Istertel: Both sides had their chances following this goal, but the defense and goalkeepers of both teams played extremely well. Jeserin Renteritel seemed confident to atone for his mistake that cost them the game against Ravenspire, and he played extremely well, but so did his counterpart, and the Pandas could not get a goal behind the Croc keeper.

<<The following is shown on the screen with the usual background:
[code:1:1d478bdb60]
Nikea 0
@
Tanah Burung 1
(Livit 8)
[/code:1:1d478bdb60]
>>

<<During the next commentary, highlights are shown of the actions described.>>

Istertel: Today's match against basement dwelling Trafari was not as impressive as the last match.

Aseriuene: No, as we can see from these plays here, terrible performance all around. If Trafari had posed any kind of serious attack, I believe that the Pandas would have crumbled all around, however, the Trafari players seem to have lost any confidence or interest, now having lost 5 straight matches.

Istertel: Nikea was lucky to come out of this match with a win, however, in the 43rd minute, there was one bright spot.

Aseriuene: Yes, Keserin Keresiuene may not be popular in Interiu during league play, but today, the Interiu crowd made him feel right at home as he showed why he was the NPL player of the year. He curls this ball right into the left corner on a wonderfully placed free kick just outside the box. He's dangerous from that range.

Istertel: It's a shame that the Interiu crowd did not see other spectacular plays, but Nikea did struggle out of the match with a win.

<<The following is shown on the screen with the usual background:
[code:1:1d478bdb60]
Trafari 0
@
Nikea 1
(Keresiuene 43)
[/code:1:1d478bdb60]
>>

Istertel: Things look grim for Nikean qualifying hopes. While not mathematically eliminated, with 5 matches left, they are 10 points out of the top of the table, and it does not look like Ravenspire or the Crocs will suffer any kind of breakdown. They are still 4th place, but only on goal differential, and the next match is the showdown for that 4th place, at home in Interiu once again to Alasdair I Frosticus. Well, until next time, I'm Limenin Istertel, along with Rakemin Aseriuene, saying good night.

Brittania Cruise Once More To Victory.


You are watching EuropaSport World Cup VII, Fourth Qualifiying match- group five.

Europa Brittania V DePaul




Brittania continued on course for WC Qualification after a comfortable 2-0 win over DePaul this Evening.

Jarvis Smith took the oppertunity to rest Andrew Zurich, leaving David Winters and Derek Lionel to partner up front together. A rare rest for Mark Reeves also saw the WC debut of Mikel Hansen. The central Midfield pairing of Junnon and McHilton also recieved some much needed R & R, allowing both Roberte Lhitomer and Young Noel Huntly making his first WC Start.

Brittania lined up 4-4-2:



------------------------Hansen--------------------------



Jones----------O'Hanrahan--------Cannon------Stacey



Strazt----------Huntly---------Lhitomer---------Simmons



------------------Winter-------Lionel-------------------



Feirce debate had already been the norm since the 4-1 defeat of Sliponia as to wether this was the finest Brittanian performance of any WC qualifiying run, and indeed cup run itself ever. Though it is early, the ease at which the team have settled into winning ways has been a testimony to the brilliant managerial skills of Jarvis Smith, who continues to lay claim as the most succesful Senior International manager Brittania has seen.


Brittania took the lead through Roberte Lhitomer, whom was first to make contact with a Simmons corner on eleven minutes to volley Brittania ahead. The visitors threatened repeatedly, and some good saves from Hansen prevented an equaliser on twenty fives minutes.

Brittania doubled their lead after the break through the striking prowess of Veteran Forward David Winter, after a neat one two with Derek Lionel put the Khandrias United Hitman through on goal. Winter held his Nerve to overcome the DePaul Keeper, and make it 2-0.



Final Score

Europa Brittania 2 DePaul 0

Lhitomer 11 Winter 54

From the Columbia Times:

Lions With Winning Record Halfway Through Qualifying

COLUMBIA, FD -- Celebrations erupted again today at Holmes Stadium as the Bedistan Lions national football team celebrated its third straight win.

After yesterday's 2-0 victory over the Republic of Canada, the fans were eager to see the same treatment of the team from Etria. Once again, the stadium's 82,814 seats were all full, though some of these seats were actually holding multiple fans. Estimated attendance for the game was 93,025.

The game was actually fairly uneventful, but Jeff Whitehurst certainly came through, scoring a hat trick against the Etrian defense.

Team coach Jim Parker is ecstatic with the team's performance so far. "Three wins in our first five matches? That's much better than we've ever started qualifying before, and if we can keep this momentum up I think we'll make it to the Cup once again."

The team must next travel to Ariddia. This is not likely to be an easy match, especially as their team is coming off a 6-2 victory over Rhaken Kull. The group standings are as follows:

1. [8] Ariddia [5-0-0, 15 points]
2. [94] Rhaken Kull [4-0-1, 12 points]
3. [24] Bedistan [3-0-2, 9 points]
4. The Republic of Canada [2-0-3, 6 points]
5. Middleton [1-0-4, 3 points]
6. Etria [0-0-5, 0 points]

Final score:
Bedistan 3 (Whitehurst 22, 49, 75)
Etria 0

How did Dark Outcasts beat me 5-1. That's gotta hurt in the ratings.

Errinundera 1 LordSquall 1
Err Goal: longipesp (80th minute)
Err Best: adealbata, longipesp, codith

[code:1:2cb90a6753]
Group 5 P W D L F A GD PTS
Europa Brittania 5 4 0 1 14 2 +12 12
Errinundera 5 3 1 1 6 4 +2 10
LordSquall 5 2 2 1 10 9 +1 8
DePaul 5 1 1 3 9 13 -4 4
Sliponia 5 1 1 3 6 11 -5 4
Kaze Progressa 5 1 1 3 8 14 -6 4
[/code:1:2cb90a6753]

Full report tonight.

Zihkav
Zihkav
Zihkav
Zihkav
Zihkav

What does it take to get through to you?

What the hell is he talking about?

Dude, you've got Zihkav on the brain.

*Slaps Tnui... with a fish*

FROSTY RECEPTION

Insubstantial shadows flickering slightly. A ripple in the fabric of the space-time continuum. The visitors from Alasdair I Frosticus snap into view on the pitch at Senayan Stadium. From the Dreamed Realm Beyond, they materialize -- absent one minute, whole the next. Willed into being on this plane by their legion of dreaming monks from another plane. A gasp from the crowd. This is not something we see every day in Tanah Burung.

The AIF players move like shadows, like CGI beings made only of light. Dream-generated images. This does not help them a great deal. Once the shock wears off, Crocodile players begin to treat the AIF DGI's like ordinary footballers. Their play is certainly ordinary. They seem unable to dematerialize and rematerialize elsewhere on the pitch. They can be beaten. And they have no offside trap to speak of.

David Cavaco, who remembers watching the broadcasts of WC2 from Alasdair I Frosticus as a boy, shakes off his awe the quickest. His goal wakes up his team mates. They are not playing against a team of spirits; they are playing against a team that has seen better days. Yosepha Syahrir adds the second marker. Tanah Burung wins 2-0. Frustratingly enough, Ravenspire gets the same result to maintain its slimmer-than-slim edge atop the table.

Final score:
Tanah Burung 2 Alasdair I Frosticus 0
(Cavaco 61, Syahrir 73)


DOPING BY DOPES?

In which our Cub reporter speculates on the cause of Heeby Jeebies....

You saw the match. Gilmeecia stuns the Snub Nosies with a draw. Gilmeecians may not even know what a draw is. But they got one. And they even won a game.

We all know it wasn't through their own efforts. I mean, they try, but most of them are as likely to eat a football as kick it. Show them a magazine, and they're more likely to wipe their bum on it than open it up to look at the pictures. So how did they do it?

I suspect these "Gilmeecian Heebie Jeebies" we're hearing about are not some random disease. The President of Gilmeecia is famous for having his enemies brutally cut into small pieces and tossed into dumpsters behind their mother's houses, then announcing that the deceased must have accidentally fallen over a cliff and landed on a hail of bullets on his way into a stray blender. But maybe he got smart. Maybe, just maybe, the Gilmeecians have drugged their opponents.

But how did hallucingenics gets past the anti-doping inspectors? My theory is that the Hooligans brought it on themselves. Exhibit A: one raspberry, shipped from Snub Nose 38 to Bi Kikere, then coaching Tanah Burung, after her team was eliminated from World Cup 6. Exhibit B: oreadest, the Errinundrian footballer whose World Cup career was shattered by a doping scandal, a man known to have spiked drinks with narcotic substances. Exhibit C: the Tanah Burung drug industry, still thriving and exporting all sorts of illicit substances through underground networks. An industry with easy access to one Bi Kikere, despondent and in need of chemical stimulation after her World Cup 6 debacle. Exhibit D: Bi Kikere herself, now hired to coach the Kickfooters of Gilmeecia. A woman who will stop at nothing to feed her ego. Exhibit E: The President of Gilmeecia. A man not known for his respect for the law. A man quite capable of ordering the use of illegal narcotics in a desperate bid to avoid a string of 7-0 losses and the overthrow of his teetering regime by an angry mob of mad-as-hellers. A man known to have stood on grassy knolls. Exhibit F: the results of Gilmeecia's games against Snub Nose 38 and Antaeus Rising. Impossible results. Until you watch the head movements of the other team: always back, and to the left.

The message is clear: foul play. Conspiracy. Corruption at the highest levels of the game. Multiple shooters. And a cover-up by Them. You know who I mean. In fact, maybe you're one of Them. I've already said too much.

8pm news

Yasmina Jones (presentator): "And tonight we have with us Myrtille Ford, forward player in Ariddia's national football team. Myrtille, we're still in the qualifying stages of the World Cup, but so far it's been five matches, five victories! Twenty goals scored, seven goals conceded. I don't think Ariddia has ever had five consecutive victories until today. How do you feel about the team's performance this far?"

Myrtille Ford: "Well, we're all very happy. Big surprise." *laughs* "It does put a big responsibility on us, though. Now we have to try and keep this up till the end. Damn." *grins*

Jones: "So do you think this time Ariddia might go all the way?"

Ford: "I don't know. There are some teams out there who have a pretty solid background, while we've never made it to the top three. This time, though... we may be in with a chance to achieve It."

Jones: "By It you mean..."

Ford: "By It I mean get to the semi-finals. Some of our supporters have been waiting almost three decades for that to happen. We just can't let them down."

Jones: "I'm sure you won't. Best of luck to you, and of course we'll be following every stage of the World Cup. You've been watching the 8pm news, I'm Yasmina Jones, have a good evening!"

KM: ...Meanwhile, in sports, a football match against former unknowns Freedom Country resulted in a 2-0 victory for Ravenspire. The goals were both scored early, by Zhen Sui-Ling and Kaede Kitsuki, at 19 and 28 minutes.

MB: Kaede is emerging as the star of this team, Kath. So far, she's scored in every game the team's played. Quite a difference from the nervous newcomer of two Cups ago.

KM: The Ravens' win maintained their first-place position in their group over the Tanah Burung Crocodiles, who achieved identical results against Alisdair I Frosticus.

MB: The Ravens' lead hangs by the margin of a single goal, however, and with both Tanah Burung and Ravenspire four points ahead of the rest of the pack, it seems likely that tomorrow's match between the two will put one of them into a convincing lead.

KM: Of course, they could battle to another draw.

MB: True. If they don't, though, the winner is all but guaranteed to go through to the Cup proper, while the loser would still have to contend with Freedom Country and perhaps Nikea, which trails but has been performing well. They've lost a few, but only by narrow margins.

KM: A team to watch in the future, sports fans. Tune in tomorrow, as we bring you coverage of the second Ravenspire-Tanah Burung match...

Kathryn Malley and Michael Black, reporting for RNN

Major news items from the Fanny Moo Examiner On-line:

http://reachcanada.com/Uploads/MastHeadWebsite/MastHeadWebSite.4.gif

FANNY MOO'S BIGGEST SUCK FOUND
Spring is here in Errinundera. The days are getting longer; the nights warmer, the rain more persistent. The forest is damp and lush. The leeches are multiplying. Yes, it can only mean one thing. The annual blood-sucking contest is upon us. The rules are simple. You train up your leech, bring it to the sacred tree, CUNNUSVACCAE, attach it to an exposed part of your body under the supervision of judges and whoever has the biggest leech after one hour is the winner. With hundreds of people arriving from all over the nation to witness this famous event, rivalry between the contestants is fierce.

This year's winner is mucus, an eight year old whose leech, spot, attained a diameter of 6 cm after gorging itself on her neck (the place favoured by competitors). The judges said that local postmaster, aterma, would have won easily had his leech, twinkles, not exploded in the 48th minute. Prior to popping twinkles had achieved the mind-boggling diameter of 10 cm. This was seen as poetic justice by many observers as it was widely rumoured that twinkles had been on a course of steroids for several weeks.

PLOSER CRASHES AT HOME AND BOOMS ABROAD
The spontaneous nationwide boycott of Pinnacle shoes and footballs throughout the nation has had a huge impact on their manufacturer, Ploser Microfibres Ltd. Retail stores confirm that, in less than a week, the Pinnacle brand had slumped from # 1 to unsellable. Fanny Moo shoe shop proprietor, buttonupboots, said that not one item had been sold since the boycott was announced. "Fortunately for us, Ploser Ltd, has agreed to a buy back at the same price I bought them. So I don't lose a single waratah."

Boycott activist, swellen, was delighted with the response from the public. "We are going to bring this rotten enterprise down. They have treated the Fannies with complete disdain and their exploitation of the poor refugees is both cynical and shameful. It just goes to prove the old adage that capitalism corrupts and absolute capitalism corrupts absolutely."

Corporation CEO, ploser, is not fazed by the boycott. "We know exactly what we are doing. The opportunities for realizing obscene profits in Errinundera are slim so our intention all along has been to develop overseas markets. Our margins within Errinundera are tiny yet we cannot keep up with demand abroad. All remaindered stock within the nation is being exported right now as we speak while our major factory in Fanny Moo is in full production. Sure, the productivity of the refugees isn't high right now but we promise it will improve as we introduce changes to work practices."

Despite ploser's triumphalist speech, local union organizer, sharonb, is laid back to the point of being smug. "I told you that things were going to end badly for Ploser Microfibres Ltd if they continued to behave like dingoes in a an unsupervised children's nursery. Well this war is not over yet. This dill doesn't know what he's got himself into."

DISAPPOINTMENT FOR HAZEL
Local football star, pomaderrisa, known to her longfoot teammates as hazel, dipped out in her research into the sexual habits of the natives of LordSquall. "The nation has an amazingly high proportion of homosexuals," she said. "It seems that all the men in the team are gay and all the women are straight. What a bizarre combination! I wasn't able to score with any of them."

We asked her why she was called hazel when 75% of Errinundrians had hazel or green eyes. "Well, if you look closely, you'll see my eyes are brown. So my nickname works on the same principle of people with straight hair being called 'curly', quiet people 'rowdy', redheads 'blue' and Errinundrians 'co-operative'."

ERRINUNDERA CONTINUES INDIFFERENT RECORD AGAINST LORDSQUALL
Despite heavy favouritism and the support of a vocal crowd at Milosis Coliseum in McKillops Bridge, Errinundera today drew one-all with LordSquall. In 3 encounters so far in World Cup games the national team's record against LS is two draws and a three-one loss. Errinundera's only goal today was a flukey effort by longipesp in the 80th minute when the visiting goalie cramped just as the acrobatic striker let fly. Perhaps she would have scored without his mishap but it did seem to restrict his movement.

This is not to detract from longipesp who played well for the full ninety minutes. The standout player, however, for Errinundera was adealbata who is having a wonderfully consistent qualifying series. moschatuma seems to have lost a little speed since WC6 so it is good to see his protegee stepping up a level. adealbata still sees himself as the apprentice. "Let's be honest here. I will never have the sublime skills of moschatuma. I'm still learning and still improving. I just try to use my native wit out there on the field."

Coach fionar expressed her concern over the team's inability to manage big scores against lower ranked sides. "Our style of play, whilst being highly successful in terms of wins, is not conducive to high scoring games. This could count against us if qualification is really tight as we approach the end of the series. As you know, if teams end the qualifiers with the same number of points then it comes down to goal difference and then goals for. This heavily favours sides with good attacks over sides with good defences. To end the season, say, with a GF=10 and GA=4 is, in my opinion, superior to finishing GF=20 and GA=13 yet the latter team would qualify ahead of the former. And yet, it seems to me, that some power greater than me is determining whether our side should have an attacking advantage or a defensive advantage."

HSMG News at 9

.......
and in sport this evening, the Halfassedstates football team continued their qualification quest, with another home game against Tha Machine.
The game took place at The Glade (home of National champions The Cenataurs). An early strike from Nea Hope gave Halfassed the lead, before a mistake by Jones left Tha Machine #9 with a free header from a corner and O'Malley conceeded his first international goal after 310mins of play. Half-time saw a couple of changes for Halfassed, with both Wallace and Lee King coming off and debutants Al Bundy and Freddy Crewgar coming in on their home pitch.
Both had an effect on the game, Bundy played a beautiful 1-2 with Murphy that allowed the Borderers striker to restore Halfassed's lead on 57mins. 3 mins later Crewgar got brought down on the edge of the box, and from the resulting free-kick, Ree King made it 3-1. With 5 mins to go, Murphy got his second of the night and of the campaign with a wonderful over-head volley off another Bundy cross.
Final score - Halfassed 4 Tha Machine 1

So with Akbarland defeating Estiv and M&G beating PofJ, the half-way table looks like this;
[code:1:2651f76c8b]
Group 6 P W D L F A GD Pts
Akbarland 5 4 0 1 16 5 11 12
Halfassedstates 5 4 0 1 12 3 9 12
Tha Machine 5 3 0 2 11 7 4 9
Melita and Gaulos 5 3 0 2 8 10 -2 9
Promise of Joshua 5 1 0 4 4 12 -8 3
Estiv 5 0 0 5 1 15 -14 0 [/code:1:2651f76c8b]

WC7 Qualifying stats
Scorers so far;
Nea Hope 4
Ree King 3
Will Wallace 2
Sean Murphy 2
Bryan Samuelsson 1

GK
Derek Malcolm 2 conceeded in 1 game (torn knee ligaments in training out for qualifying at least)
Brendan O'Malley 1 in 4

THE PAGE HAS BEEN UPDATED
:!: :?: :idea: :arrow: http://nswcc.tripod.com/ :arrow: :idea: :?: :!:

Oh, and if Lemmy or TnUI could handle the news section of the site that would be great....

Sources report that the Tanah Burung football club's blimp, the Flying Cassowary, is being repainted for the away trip to Ravenspire. "It's bright pink, now," said Mau Lear, a technician at Tiga Burung International Airfield. "And we're putting on a slogan in giant blue letters. It says: Democracy Now! Hope they like it."

It's been some time since the Crocodiles mixed sports and politics, as they did in their first World Cup appearance, when the team had the habit of unveiling half-time banners critical of their opponents' human rights record. There are already criticisms being made of the apparent nose-thumbing to Ravenspire, classed by the UN as a benevolent dictatorship. "This is a make-or-break match," said Crocs fan Horatio da Silva. "Let's stick to the game, people. We need goals against Ravenspire, not a debate over forms of governance."

Maybe so. But there's little Tanah Burung citizens enjoy more than a good debate over governance. "Participatory democracy, that's the real national sport," said Professor Ines Aitarak of Lovefest University.

ORD Continues Winning Streak

The Dottian National Team has gained another win, still stopping short behind unbeaten Dark Outcast by 3 points. The Dottians trashed last place Bullonien 4-0 at the Chisai'nihon Stadium this afternoon, sending the nation into euphoria.

STONE scored a goal swiftly at the 23rd minute followed by another goal by H. RADFORD at the 39th minute. The Dottians kept the pace throughout the one-sided match, but many opportuinities were lost as the team grew too over-confident.

The second half started with a bang as STONE again maintaining control of the ball. The defenders didn't even know what passed them as STONE shot pass and scored at the 46th minute. At the 83rd minute, substitute WHITEMAN, who had substituted DURSLEY at the 72nd minute, scored a goal, bringing the final score to 4-0 at the final whistle.

Head Coach Alvin Ker is extremely happy with the performance of the team but the next match would be against Dark Outcast whom the Dottians had failed to defeat at their first meeting on Day 1 where they lost 1-2 on home ground at the age-old Queen Tracy Stadium.

Assistant Coach David Joel said that the first time, they were still unsteady, but this time the team is pumped up to kick Outcast ass.

Here is the Group 4 Qualifying Table after Day 5:
[code:1:5205ba50ee]
Group 4 P W D L F A GD T
15 Dark Outcasts 5 5 0 0 13 3 +10 15
21 One Red Dot 5 4 0 1 14 2 +12 12
Grand master Mark 5 2 1 2 7 10 -3 7
51 Aquilla 5 1 1 3 6 11 -5 4
Pablicosta 5 0 2 3 7 13 -6 2
Bullonien 5 0 0 5 1 10 -9 0
[/code:1:5205ba50ee]

One Red Dot will be playing guest to Dark Outcast on Day 6 of the Qualifying.

NEWSFLASH:

Giant Zucchini romped to a 4-1 home win against ENRG, Urk scoring a sensational hat-trick before Kerrnigit capped it off with another trademark free-kick. ENRG got on the scoresheet first with a dubious penalty when their striker fell in the box. The shot from the spot slammed hard into the goal, and the Zucchinis found themselves trailing in 4 minutes. However, the Zucchinis found themselves on level terms within a matter of seconds. Right at the kickoff, Urk started a run down the centre. Kerrnigit played a long ball, splitting the defence and allowing Urk to beat the offside trap. Urk's resultant volley slammed into the right corner of the goal. 32 minutes into the game, Urk started a run down the centre again, this time in possession of the ball. After slicing the ENRG defence like a hot knife through butter, Urk finished the move off with a deft flick over the keeper into the net. The action continued after the break, Urk scoring his hat-trick in the 68th minute. Urk flew down the left flank with frightening pace before cutting into the box and slipping a low shot between the legs of the keeper, the ball hitting the post before rolling into the goal. Kerrnigit sealed the win with a trademark free-kick curling into the far corner from far out in the 89th minute. Head Coach Mr Hurr, "Today's performance puts a smile on my face. I just hope we can continue playing like this all the way through the qualifiers and through the cup."

Val Elensar: And welcome back to the live coverage of the World Cup Qualifier, pitting Spaam against Christofi. How do you think we'll go, Rohir?

Rohir Amanë: Since our hiccup against Dennisov in the first match, we've been doign pretty well, though I think we were a little disappointed with only coming away with a draw at home against Jacktazea. Christofi is even with us on points, and last time we met, it wad also a 1-all draw, so it should be a close match.

Val: We'd love to come away with the win today though, and cement our place at the top of the table.

Rohir: Indeed, and we certainly have enough talent up front to do it, however, we just have to make sure that our defense stays under pressure, which has certainly been our bane over the years. Speaking of talent up front though, how about our teenage dynamic duo?

Val: Sëhelein and Dorth? They definitely have the wow factor in these qualifiers, and have been working increasingly well. They make a great pair, so far that we almost don't need any other forward players.

Rohir: Hehe, almost. Lets have a look at the line up for this match then:

[code:1:a1b9a4f2d2]
(7) (8)
Sëhelin Dorth
(6) (3)
Teinwë Lossë

(1) (10)
Tinúviel Elanessë

(9) (11)
Londë Celebri
(4) (5)
Ringer Telemnar
[/code:1:a1b9a4f2d2]

Val: A nice 4-2-4 setup there, putting the numbers on defense and keeping the talent up front.

Rohir: We can see Coach Yatan has put Lossë into a permanent Forward position, combining with Teinwë on the wings. And Narmolanya isn't on the reserve bench thanks to her injury last game, and will prolly be out of the World Cup.

Val: I believe she will be needing hip surgery for that. Ok, well, that match is about to start so....

****

(17th minute)

Val: The Christofian striker is making a run.... gets past Celebri.... is on Telemnar and shoots! And nice save there by Súrion.

Rohir: Possession is chopping and changing her all the time.... exciting stuff....

****

(24th minute)

Rohir: Teinwë has the ball.... supported by Sëhelin.... he shoots! And a save by the Christofi Keeper. There are chances all the time tonight....

****

(31st minute)

Val: Tinúviel passes to Sëhelin.... she and Dorth are moving up the centre.... and now they've only got one defender!

Rohir: They have the numbers and she passes to Dorth who shoots and GOOOOAAAALLLL! Dorth and Sëhelin combine to get the opener and its 1 nil in the 31st minute.

Val: The home crowd is going wild here, they love these two strikers....

****

(45th minute)

Val: The Christofi striker shoots and its saved. And thats half time!

Rohir: Spaam is leading 1 nil against Christofi and with that we'll go to the break.

****

(52nd minute)

Rohir: Oooh! Elanessë is tackled by the Christofian midfielded and he is NOT happy. He's pushing and oh no.... a fight has broken out between the two number 10s. The ref is coming up and yes, Red Cards for the both of them.

Val: That sort of behaviour is not something we like to see here and obviously the passion is building up. Well, the teams are down to ten a piece, so we'll probably see a couple of changes made.

Rohir: Indeed! I believe Yatan is bringing Teinwë off, and putting Ar-Fein on instead, moving Lossë back a bit. This makes it into a 2-2-1-4 setup, so he seems to be a moving more into the defensive.

Val: Well, with Christofi to take the penalty kick, and a goal in front, he wants to make sure we get the win, but without comprimising the front half. Teinwë's been looking a bit tired anyway, so its not that suprising.

Rohir: Ok, Christofi taking the kick....

****

(62nd minute)

Rohir: Ar-Fein over to Sëhelin over to Dorth who runs with the ball.... defenders converging on him.... and Sëhelin's in the clear! Dorth boots it over to her and she shoots SCORE! A beautiful striker there by Sëhelin gets the second for Spaam.

Val: Beautiful stuff there, you have to love the elegance of Méla's style, and she is definitely the jewel of this side.

Rohir: Can't forget Dorth though, great support from him, and Méla would not have as many chances without him.

****

(90th minute)

Val: The Spaam side is just counting down the seconds now, and keeping the ball in play. And thats the whistle! So Spaam wins 2 nil against Christofi.

****

Val: Lets look at the group table now:

[code:1:a1b9a4f2d2]
Group 13 P W D L F A GD Points
Dennisov 5 3 2 0 14 4 10 11
Spaam 5 3 1 1 11 6 5 10
Jacktazea 5 2 2 1 7 5 2 8
Christofi 5 2 1 2 7 4 3 7
Ribenia 5 1 2 2 4 7 -3 5
Crimina 5 0 0 5 2 19 -17 0
[/code:1:a1b9a4f2d2]

Rohir: Looks like we're well placed in the top now, only one point away from Dennisov. If we continue with our current form, we should easily make it into the main round.

Val: Don't forget, we also have the home ground advantage against Dennisov next match, so if we can come away with a win from that, a top 2 finish should be guaranteed. Ok, since we're half way though qualifying, lets have a run down of the other groups. Rohir?

Rohir: Ok, Group 1. Nice looking table there, with Ariddia undefeated, and Rhaken Kull losing only to Ariddia. I don't think there will be any suprises there.
Group 2. This is probably the Group Of Death, with only 2 wins separating first from last. I'd be suprised if Liverpool England don't make it through, but otherwise, you just can't pick it.
Group 3. Ravenspire and Tanah Burung are pretty even, but far out in front, so they should make it through.
Group 4. Dark Outcasts are unbeaten, and One Red Dot are just one win behind, with the rest of the teams fighting below. Should finish like that too.
Group 5. Europa Brittania should make it through, and so should Errinundera, but Lord Squall could suprise here. The rest of the teams don't have a chance.
Group 6. Akbarland and Halfassedstates are neck and neck out front, but the dark horses are Tha Machine, and Melita And Gaulos. Could be interesting.
Group 7. Kingsford are dominating unbeaten in this group, more than 2 wins away from 2nd, so are easily through. As for the rest though, its anyone's guess, between Davidus Voldemort, Busby, and Gnoolocopolep.
Group 8. Lunatic Goofballs are the stars of these qualifiers, and are 2 wins ahead of 2nd place, so are also easily through. But any of the other teams bar Katimarie can finish second.
Group 9. Giant Zucchini first, Oglethorpia second, and I think it will finish that way.
Group 10. Quohog is unbeaten, so should make it through, and either The Belmore Family or Dyelli Beybi should finish second.
Group 11. Snub Nose 38 and Nonexistentcitygrad are easily dominating, so it should finish that way too. Nonexistentcitygrad has been a suprise powerhouse here.
Group 12. Squorshelous, the team that put us out of World Cup V is a sure bet, but second place will be close. Malundar has a better GD, but West Ariddia have the talent of its parent nation, so this should prove to very exciting.
Group 13. I think Dennisov and Spaam should remain in the top 2, but you can't underestimate Christofi, and Jacktazea have proven themselves to be very strong, so may pip somone into second.
Group 14. Fairly close, but Svecia and Haraki should stay in the top 2.
Group 15. Total n Utter Jackass is unbeaten in this group, and should go straight on. Oddslavo should be second, but Timway is fairly strong, so may suprise.

Val: Thanks for that. Well, thats all the time we have tonight. We'll see you next time, for Spaam versus Dennisov. Goodnight.

From the First Creek Falls Age, news just breaking in Errinundera.

http://www.theage.com.au/images/mast1.gif

LEATHER SCANDALS

ERRINUNDERA TO
FORFEIT AGAINST
EUROPA BRITTANIA

Leather substituted for
leather substitute

With just hours to go before the sixth round of World Cup 7
qualifying, the NationStates World Cup community is about to be
rocked by one of its biggest scandals yet. The University of Milosis
in McKillops Bridge has explained why Ploser microfibre is
indistinguishable from leather.

It is leather.

The university has carried out extensive tests on footballs and
boots provided to them by labour union officials who collected
them from retail stores all over the nation. This secret collection
has been going on since the dispute over wages began in Fanny
Moo five weeks ago. Professor elassdomg from the University's
department of Chemical Engineering explained to us that the tests
are simple, quick and precise. "Preliminary results show
conclusively that only microfibre that has been manufactured
within Errinundera can be trusted to be the real thing, that is, a
leather substitute. Any material that has been manufactured
offshore has so far tested to be a fake, that is, a leather
substitute substitute. I'm getting confused here. Let me start
again. If the source material was made in Errinundera it's
microfibre, if imported it's leather."

Spontaneous boycott planner and activist, swellen, explained the
implications. "First of all I want to make two points clear.
Errinundera makes very little microfibre for Ploser. Most is
imported. On the other hand we make almost all of their finished
products such as footballs and football boots. As you know, in the
last couple of weeks all their products have been recalled and
shipped overseas. So if you want genuine microfibre gear in
Errinundera, well I'm sorry, there's none to be had. It's as if Ploser
Microfibres has played an elaborate joke on our nation."

To find out how this scam came to be uncovered we need to visit
the epicentre: Fanny Moo. The first person to have suspicions was
sniffer wombat trainer, whoaboy. "My wombats are trained to sniff
out banned substances such as meat, leather, tobacco, guns, cars,
police and military personnel. For some time now the wombats
have been getting very agitated whenever I went near the
factory. I didn't think much of it until I mentioned it in passing to
my mate, sharonb, the union organiser. Suddenly it struck me that
my girls and boys could be on to something. sharonb agreed and
promised to have it investigated."

Errinundera's Protector of Sport, filthyl, was informed and instantly
recognized the implications for the national side. He immediately
sent samples of the team's gear to the University of Milosis for
testing. "It's all leather. Every last scrap of the stuff we use.
Breaking the news to the team was one of the most horrible
things I've ever had to do. Several members of the team, including
the team coach fionar, became so ill they vomited."

A very green about the gills moschatuma told The Age that the
team will not play any more matches until they can be assured
that their footwear and balls are not manufactured from dead
animal products. "Words cannot express my horror at what has
happened. To think that I've been kicking the shit out of ex-cows is
horrible beyond words." Team coach, fionar, has expressed her
solidarity with the team's decision to forfeit the match against
Europa Brittania.

Expressions of support have come from the Protector of Sport,
filthyl, and from the Main Protector, willd, who issued the following
statement: "We are currently endeavourng to locate any Ploser
products still around the nation so it can be given a decent and
respectful burial. Anybody who thinks the may have a dead animal
product can have it tested. Magistrates will be investigating what
sort of compensation will be appropriate. It is our intention that
Ploser Microfibres be required to pay this compensation."

It is clear that, despite the nation's pride in the achievements of
their national team, it too supports the players' decision. As we go
to press reports are coming in of angry crowds gathering at Ploser
plants around the country.

It also remains to be seen how the NSWCC reacts to these
developments. We are not aware of a nation forfeiting a match
before. Even nations that have ceased to exist have managed to
send teams and score goals. At this stage it is too early to tell
what the implications are for the longfoots' prospects of qualifying.

As yet we have not been able to get an official comment from the
Europa Brittania team which is currently lodging at the former
palace in McKillops Bridge ahead of the game that had been
scheduled for this afternoon.

From the First Creek Falls Age, news just breaking in Errinundera.
http://www.theage.com.au/images/mast1.gif
LEATHER SCANDALS

ERRINUNDERA TO FORFEIT AGAINST EUROPA BRITTANIA

Leather substituted for leather substitute

*we find ourselves in the office of the manager of the snub nose 38 hooligans national football team, located in the '38 special' national stadium. ben dover, the manager, is reading the morning 'scuttlebutt' at his desk. his wife, eileen dover, the teams defensive coach, is standing at the window, eating an apple and watching the crowd gather for this afternoons match with gesamtkunstwerk.*

- Eileen, this is unbelievable! Errinundera is about to forfeit a qualifying match!
- What! Why?
- It seems the "leather substitute" used for their gear that usually is made of leather, is made of leather, as the leather substitute substituted is leather.
- Say what, now?
- They don't use leather. They use a leather substitute. Someone substituted leather for the leather substitute.
- Clear as mud, that.
- Their leather stuff that's supposed to be substitute leather is leather substituted for the leather substitute.
- I can see you talking, but...
- Whatever. Don't we have some gear around here made of leather substitute? You know, the "Faux"-Ploser stuff.
- We've got a few footballs, and about 2 dozen pairs of boots.
- Send a telegram to the Errinundera Manager. We'll let 'em have the stuff, if they can get their match postponed by the WCC long enough to get it to them.
- But, if they forfeit...
- Eileen, they're down on the field injured, and we're kickin' the ball out of bounds.
- Oh. I'll get the telegram off right away.

Belmore travel to Quohog
Hello and welcome to world cup covarage..
We have an exclusive interview with TBF boss, Alan Belmore.
Interviewer:So, your travelling to Quohog, how confident are you?
Alan:Well the team are in graet shape and after winning 4 games on the trot we're looking good.
Interviewer:Do you think you can go through top of your group?
Alan: Well the prospects are looking good. Especially if Quohog slip up.
Interviewer:There is speculation with a fall out between you and the other Alan Belmore, is this true?
Alan:No of course not. We are the greatest of friends.
Interviwer: Thank you

Back in the studio
So Tom how are the teams looking like lining up?
Tom:Well with myself out along with Laurence this is how TBF look to line up.
[code:1:180c9658c6]
(1)
William Belmore
(15) (4) (3) (5)
Eric Belmore Daniel Belmore Alec Belmore Jake Belmore
(6) (11) (10) (8)
John Belmore Fred Belmore Alex Belmore Nick Belmore
(22) (7)
JP Belmore Alan Belmore
[/code:1:180c9658c6]
Also Eric Belmore makes his debut for the team. But that's all for now... goodnight and god bless.

The Belmore Family Loses To Quohog

HAHA!

:P

Belmore lose...but still stay 2nd
Despite a 2-1 loss to Qouhog TBF have retained the second posistion due to New Persia beating Delli Dubi!

The World Cup Hosting Committee of Lemmitania and Audioslavia would like to express its condolences to the Errinundrian longfoots, and to the entire nation of Errinundera, over the revelation that they have been handling and covering parts of their bodies with dead animals.

However, while we are sympathetic to the feelings of the players, it is clear that the World Cup must proceed. The WCHCLA is willing to postpone the sixth qualifying match between Errinundera and Eruopa Brittania only if the Europa Brittanian team consents to postponement. If the Europa Brittanian team does not agree to postponing the match, Errinundera will lose by forfeit, with a score of 0-0.

We await Europa Brittania's response.

Other matches will proceed as normal. Scores have been posted for match day 6.

I have updated the website with a new page called "Workings" which links the spreadsheet we are using to generate scores. Have a look.

http://nswcc.tripod.com/workings.html

The spreadsheet is currently sorted by groups, but you can easily select the range of columns containing team data (that would be columns A through K) and sort by name, rank, or whatever you want to. I will post a detailed explanation of the formulas contained in the various columbs at some point.

To generate scores, you simply scroll down to about row 96, where you'll find a convenient matchup table. Enter the three matchups for the day, and BOOM! it calculates the scores for you all nice and neat. Copy, paste, and it's posted.

Anyone who wants to play around with the formulas should feel free to do so. Save the spreadsheet, and tweak to your heart's content.

the list of stadiums and stuff will be finished in an hour or so when im not so busy, theres a few bits and bobs already edited into the first page of the thread :)

I'll have a look. Not sure if I would be so good on News. Maybe I should have my own page where I take the piss out of people?

If you do all the work, then go ahead :P

Or if you want to do the classic teams and superpowers.

Or the rankings....

Oh, and I think you should generate the scores again Lemmy....

TnUI Declares Day Of Mourning As Timway Score Goal
Even though TnUI scored 4 to Timway's 1 :P

Well randomly picked scors sounds fun but in REal Life we would whip you at ice hockey and possibly soccer

My kit.
http://www.abelmore.com/tbf%20kit.gif

TnUI Declares Day Of Mourning As Timway Score Goal
Even though TnUI scored 4 to Timway's 1 :P

NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!

I have updated the website with a new page called "Workings" which ... (stuff was here) Have a look.

http://nswcc.tripod.com/workings.html

The spreadsheet is ... (other stuff was here) and tweak to your heart's content.
I looked. I am afraid. I am very, very, afraid. :wink:

I have updated the website with a new page called "Workings" which ... (stuff was here) Have a look.

http://nswcc.tripod.com/workings.html

The spreadsheet is ... (other stuff was here) and tweak to your heart's content.
I looked. I am afraid. I am very, very, afraid. :wink:

not half as afraid as i am, and i have to generate scores :/ :p

*looks*

Oh, very clever. Do you update the stats after every match?

She's living with the milkman, I should have known something has going on. Bitch, she'll pay!

[code:1:83570dc3b2]
Name P W D L F A GD Pts
TnUI 6 6 0 0 16 1 +15 18
Oddslavo 6 5 0 1 11 4 +7 15
Timway 6 3 0 3 15 12 +3 9
Zihkav 6 1 1 4 4 10 -6 4
God Squad 6 1 1 4 6 16 -10 4
Bizarro 6 1 0 5 9 18 -9 3
[/code:1:83570dc3b2]

Much Ado About Nothing

Sargard, Ravenspire (AP) -- Ravenspire's Twilight Coast, well-known for its black-sand beaches, hot springs, and, thanks to its proximity to the mountains, year-round ski resorts, was today crowded with tourists for a reason unrelated to its natural beauty. The recently-inaugurated Kitsuki Stadium opened its gates for the first time, playing host to the latest in a series of World Cup football qualifying matches.

Anticipation for the match between the Ravens and the Tanah Burung Crocodiles had run high, since the teams were leading their group, with only a one-goal differential placing Ravenspire in first place. Adding to the tension is the fact that the previous match between the two resulted in a draw.

Though the play in the Sargard match was almost the opposite of the previous game, when both teams had slanted their play toward offense, the end result was another draw. Following a long match which displayed impeccable defense by both sides, the game ended without a single goal being scored.

"I was hoping for another upset," said one fan, referring to the team's impressive record of defeating higher-ranked teams in previous Cups. "But in the end, we didn't lose, and it was a terrific game."

"The Crocs know the game," her wife agreed.

The 0-0 result means that Ravenspire remains technically in first place, by a one-goal margin. Many analysts expect a slip to second, based on goal differential, since the Ravens are traditionally a low-scoring, defense-oriented team.

Perhaps more speculation centered on the pink dirigible sighted at the game than on the football match itself. "That's odd. I was under the impression we were a democracy," noted one man. "Why, the Beloved Leader just called elections a few months ago. We even have a new Minister of State."

"It's because of the UN," a foxgirl added knowingly. "They never forgave Ravenspire for resigning years ago, when it became clear that they were mainly a bunch of obsolete morons. Plus, they have something against strong militaries. And that 'one man, one vote' idea... silly. If you want to sell your vote to someone, that's your business, not the government's. The UN obviously doesn't understand anything about electoral freedom. Or freedom of speech. Restricting contributions from businesses? Or how about--" [This went on for some time. We're forced to trim because of space considerations. --ed.]

A win by Freedom Country over the hapless Trafari squad keeps the third-placed team in the running, while eliminating Trafari. Meanwhile, a draw between Nikea and Alisdair I Frosticus means that either team would need a near-perfect record from this point on in order to qualify.

From the back page of this afternoons "Scuttlebutt"

[code:1:d9d0fdbbb6]
Group 11 P W D L F A GD PTS
Snub Nose 38 6 5 1 0 19 1 +18 16
Nonexistentcitygrad 6 5 0 1 14 7 +7 15
Gesamtkuntswerk 6 2 1 3 8 10 -2 7
Gilmeecia 6 2 1 3 9 16 -7 7
Antaeus Rising 6 1 2 3 6 8 -2 5
Yatsumica 6 0 1 5 2 16 -14 1
[/code:1:d9d0fdbbb6]

OOC: RP to follow - gotta actually do some work. Boo, work

Hehehehehe :)

My main qualms with the scores is that my defense seems too low. I mean granted, Spaam's defense has never been that good, but perhaps only the n most recent games should be taken into account? Otherwise it takes that much longer for the defensive/offensive ratings to improve, etc.... For example, in World Cup VI, we had 10-4 F/A, but the score are generated based on our entire history, which is like 49-35 instead of a more reasonable 49-20. And Dennisov is in general kicking our ass, even though they won the World Cup 12 years ago, and only beat us in Golden Goal.
Meh.... after playing with it, it doesn't seem to improve....
Maybe more should be put on ranking :P

Still suffering from the so called “Gilmeecian Jeebies” the national team suffered a loss in a place that doesn’t even exist. Confused? You should be.

"Hopefully we beat whipping boys Yatsumica to improve our rank before World Cup 8, but don’t hold your breath." said the Manager.

Oh, Lemmy, AS, TnUI: I updated the Excel table, but not gonna do it all until the final score is published. Or maybe someone else would like to do it? :P

And I think I've cleaned up my thoughts on the scores, and my argument goes like this: How could Dennisov, a team which didn't even make it past the main round in the last World Cup, deliver the 3rd ranked team in the world its biggest ever loss, and a loss at home? Just doesn't seem right to me :P Its like Norway beating Spain 5-1....

Dennisov are former champs who failed to get into the second round, so that like, makes them Argentina... or France :p :D

and yes, i do get the joke :p :)

Maybe you should check your team for the Gilmeecian Jeebies Spaam :lol:

Kingsford National remain Undefeated
delivers biggest victory yet in Bubsy

Today the Kingsford National arrived into Bubsy expecting to win. The Bubsy team had been marked as second best in the division, only under Kingsford. However, they are currently third, under Kingsford and late entry Davidus Voldemort.
Sam Young has played his best match yet, delivering a half trick, all within the first half (2nd, 16th, 30th). Desypar picked up a Penalty Kick goal in the 77th.
When asked to comment on the game by turkish reporter, Ghadala Hasensas, coach Dan Hall had this to say: "We went in expecting to win. This is a team that was placed 26, but when we played them at home in Byrana, we beat them three nil. One named star Desypar put the icing on the cake, making the score 4-0."
Good luck to the Kingsford National, stay undefeated!

Okay, I'm gonna do the Rankings. Would help if I knew html :P

simple
try
www.mirrormere.com for help(It's my mates site-He got 11 A* in his GCSEs!!!)

Scandel Rocks Errinundera. Brittanian FA Meets To Decide Response.




Preperations for the crucial Errinundera Brittania Qualifiying Match have been delayed with possible forfeit after revelations that the Errinunderan equipment was made from the leather- highly illegal within their borders. As such The players and coaches have refused to take to the field until such time as the equipment can be replaced.

However this will not occur before the scheduled game, which will go a long way to determining who will finish top of the group.

Brittanian Head Coach Jarvis Smith issued a statement a half hour ago:


"We feel deeply for the Errinundera Team, and that this has come as a complete shock to our own camp. However I must re-iterate the ultimate decsion of wether we press ahead does not lie with me. I have immediatley made the Brittanian FA aware of the situation, and they have advised me they are in emergency session to come to a decsion."


Independant Experts however do not believe that the Brittanian FA can make a decsion without entering into controversy. The FA are notorious sticklers for procedure, and would frown apon any alteration to the WC schedule. In addition Domestic Club Managers are often vocal in any delay, no matter how slight that sees their players on International duty for longer than is absolutley nescessery.

"On the other hand, the sportsmanlike thing to do would be to delay the match." Commented renowned Sports Journalist Jurgen Crow.

A decsion is expected shortly.

My kit.
http://www.abelmore.com/tbf%20kit.gif

It's basically the Partick Thistle kit.

A secret fanship, or just a horrible coincidence?

Still, could be worse, you could support St. Mirren. :lol:

My kit.
http://www.abelmore.com/tbf%20kit.gif

It's basically the Partick Thistle kit.

A secret fanship, or just a horrible coincidence?

Still, could be worse, you could support St. Mirren. :lol:
horrible coicidence.... I am an Aberdonian myself

As Am I, Mon the dons!

http://nswcc.tripod.com/rank1.html

My first html page. Now to do the rest.

http://nswcc.tripod.com/rank1.html

My first html page. Now to do the rest.

2 Quohoq

Last time I checked, 'q' != 'g' ... :P

Loss in Ariddia Puts Team on Edge

ARIDDIA -- While Bedistani team captain Gene Barber did successfully score a goal from a penalty kick in the second half, it was not enough even for a draw against the mighty team from Ariddia. The team had hoped to regain its composure after losing to them 2-1 earlier in qualifying, but it just didn't happen, and this time the team fell 3-1.

The loss means that the Lions remain in third place in Group 1 for the time being. Luckily, Rhaken Kull also lost its match, so the gap between 2nd and 3rd remains at three points. It is highly unlikely at this point that the Bedistani team will catch Ariddia, who has 18 points now, but it is still hoped that we will regain momentum and topple Rhaken Kull.

"In World Cup 5, we got a second chance to qualify due to the destruction of Al Quds," commented Barber. "In Six, we didn't outright qualify, but the structure of the groups put us into the round robin and we qualified from there. But right now it doesn't look like there will be any extra chances this time. We must get ourselves up to second place. Period."

The next match will be played at Holmes Stadium against Middleton, whom we defeated 2-0 earlier in qualifying. The team then goes on the road to face The Republic of Canada and Etria; we have previously shut out both teams. The final match, at home against Rhaken Kull, will likely prove to be critical. Can the Lions successfully qualify for their third straight Cup? Only time will tell.

Final score:
Ariddia 3
Bedistan 1 (Barber 58)

Loss in Ariddia Puts Team on Edge

ARIDDIA -- While Bedistani team captain Gene Barber did successfully score a goal from a penalty kick in the second half, it was not enough even for a draw against the mighty team from Ariddia. The team had hoped to regain its composure after losing to them 2-1 earlier in qualifying, but it just didn't happen, and this time the team fell 3-1.

The loss means that the Lions remain in third place in Group 1 for the time being. Luckily, Rhaken Kull also lost its match, so the gap between 2nd and 3rd remains at three points. It is highly unlikely at this point that the Bedistani team will catch Ariddia, who has 18 points now, but it is still hoped that we will regain momentum and topple Rhaken Kull.

"In World Cup 5, we got a second chance to qualify due to the destruction of Al Quds," commented Barber. "In Six, we didn't outright qualify, but the structure of the groups put us into the round robin and we qualified from there. But right now it doesn't look like there will be any extra chances this time. We must get ourselves up to second place. Period."

The next match will be played at Holmes Stadium against Middleton, whom we defeated 2-0 earlier in qualifying. The team then goes on the road to face The Republic of Canada and Etria; we have previously shut out both teams. The final match, at home against Rhaken Kull, will likely prove to be critical. Can the Lions successfully qualify for their third straight Cup? Only time will tell.

Final score:
Ariddia 3
Bedistan 1 (Barber 58)

Brittanian FA vote 6-4 against Delay


The Brittanian FA issued its deciding statement ten minutes ago, and in accordance with WC clarification procedures that it would not be giving its approval for a postponment of the Eurrinundera Tie. Chairman Lexter Bairn clarified-

"Whilst we appreciate the situation the Errinunderan team and its administration find itself in, we cannot find sufficient reason to postpone a tie as crucial as this one, therefore we submit that decsion to the NSWCC."

The Decsion has come as something to a shock to many Brittanian fans, Including team manager Jarvis Smith-

Whilst I have every sympathy, and would cancel the tie immediatley had the decsion been mine to make, I must go with the FA's ruling. Brittania will not postpone."

Sources close to the team revealed the FA's decsion did not go down well, with many, in particular Rusel Cannon was alledged to have stated-

"Those suits know jack shit.

The official NSWCC response is awaited.

Brittanian FA vote 6-4 against Delay


The Brittanian FA issued its deciding statement ten minutes ago, and in accordance with WC clarification procedures that it would not be giving its approval for a postponment of the Eurrinundera Tie. Chairman Lexter Bairn clarified-

"Whilst we appreciate the situation the Errinunderan team and its administration find itself in, we cannot find sufficient reason to postpone a tie as crucial as this one, therefore we submit that decsion to the NSWCC."

The Decsion has come as something to a shock to many Brittanian fans, Including team manager Jarvis Smith-

Whilst I have every sympathy, and would cancel the tie immediatley had the decsion been mine to make, I must go with the FA's ruling. Brittania will not postpone."

Sources close to the team revealed the FA's decsion did not go down well, with many, in particular Rusel Cannon was alledged to have stated-

"Those suits know jack shit.

The official NSWCC response is awaited.

Audioslavian sports minister Jack Shitt has denied any allegations of collusion with the persons referred to by Rusel Cannon.

, but perhaps only the n most recent games should be taken into account? Otherwise it takes that much longer for the defensive/offensive ratings to improve, etc....

Interesting. And maybe more weight should be given to ranking.

...But with a couple of exceptions, the high-ranking teams are kicking ass, rather.

Like I said, I'm happy to have the formulas played around with.

http://nswcc.tripod.com/rank1.html

My first html page. Now to do the rest.

Very nicely done.

Double post. :?

Triple post. :?

Quadriple post. Damn forums :?

Tripoli Times
Metzitzia

Metzitzia Defeated By Oglethorpia @ Home

Oglethorpia faced off with Metzitzia at an away crowd and the team preformed admirably. Hernandez gave up a goal in the 15th minute, but Danny Bolton quickly fired back with the equalizer in the 21st. Metzitzia put one more on the board in the 31st and right again in the 34th, but Danny Bolton again came through in the 43rd making the score 3-2 at the half.

Rich Stewart kicked things off in the second half with a goal in the 51st. Danny Bolton would complete a hat trick after a free kick was awarded in the 62nd. Kurt Fitzgerald sealed the deal in the 72nd for Oglethorpia to win 5-3 and Danny Bolton's first ever hat trick.

Oglethorpia 5
Metzitzia 3
Bolton 21, 43, 62, Stewart 51, Fitzgerald 72

Oglethorpia Today
Kuruma Stadium, Oglethorpia City

Oglethorpia Wins At Home

After opening up World Cup 7 qualifying with a loss to Giant Zucchini 2-1, Oglethorpia faced off with them again at home in native Kuruma Stadium. The Zucchinis held the game nil-nil going into the half, but in the 52nd Kurt Fitzgerald put the first points on the board after heading a kick in from midfielder Eddy Christianson. Fitzgerald would also score in the 66th minute to give Oglethorpia a 2-nil win over Giant Zucchini.

Oglethorpia 2
Giant Zucchini 0
Fitzgerald 52, 66

Quadriple post. Damn forums :?

tell me about it, im gonna have to write out the list and descriptions of the stadiums again :/

sort it out Max Barry!, and if you want to write movie scripts then write movie scripts, dont disguise them as novels :p :D

1, 2, 3 and 4 done.

5 and 6 done. Are we moving newbie teams down to 150 or 200 for WC8?

DAILY CONSPIRACY THEORIST

Another cover-up! What They don't want you to know is that the fix is in between the Crocodiles and Ravenspire. These two teams took alook around Group 3 and decided to screw the little guy by deliberately drawing all their matches. That way both teams get a chance to go undefeated and no one else gets a look-in.

Sure, They'll deny it. You've already heard Rosa Bibere saying she was more interested in ogling the foxgirls than going for goals. You've heard Guntur Ruak spouting off about the defensive talents of the Ravens. All nonsense, we at the Conspiracy Theorist can reveal. In a world where synthetic leather substitute is actually leather, no one can be trusted. But the truth, we continue to insist, is out there.

... by the way, beautiful as the web site is, and nice though it is to keep seeing the top news story about TB beating Trafari, shouldn't the Errinundera-Britannia imbroglio be the top story?

Hmm, imbroglio, that's a good word. imbroglio. yeah.

No-one is doing the News, you do it :P

EDIT: Actually I just thought up a news story. I'll go and write it up.

EDIT2: On second thoughts I'm not that bored. :) Was gonna do it on the only team with 5 cleansheets letting in a goal, but nevermind.

Squornshelous-2
Malundar-0

Group 12

[code:1:3594d49193]Team P W D L F A GD Pts
Squornshelous 6 6 0 0 18 1 +17 18
West Ariddia 6 3 2 1 10 9 +1 11
Malundar 6 3 1 2 14 8 +6 10
Freedomnessity 6 2 2 2 9 11 -2 8
Nintendania 6 0 2 4 6 14 -8 2
Alhana Catherine 6 0 1 5 4 18 -14 1[/code:1:3594d49193]

Ok, I updated just the results and the table.

:!: http://nswcc.tripod.com/results.html :!:

Errinunder forfeits against Europa Brittania

[code:1:4a494d0689]
Group 5 P W D L F A GD PTS
Europa Brittania 6 5 0 1 14 2 +12 15
LordSquall 6 3 2 1 15 11 +4 11
Errinundera 6 3 1 2 6 4 +2 10
DePaul 6 2 1 3 13 14 -1 7
Sliponia 6 1 1 4 7 15 -8 4
Kaze Progressa 6 1 1 4 10 19 -9 4
[/code:1:4a494d0689]

NEWSFLASH:

Giant Zucchini sees its first loss in its World Cup qualifying campaign when it visited Oglethorpia, losing 2-0. Oog, Kerrnigit and Urk failed to make the trip due to Champions League commitments, and the lack of striking power and defensive strength was readily apparent, Plaat letting in the first goal in the 52nd minute. Head Coach Mr Hurr, "It is regretful that Oog, Kerrnigit and Urk could not make it to the match. We have now lost and lost our top spot in the group. We must regroup and try and recapture our lost ground."

HSMG News @ 9
..............................
..............................
and in sport to-day, The Halfassedstates national side gained revenge on Akbarland for their opening game defeat. The game, played at The Glade, was a closely fought affair, with Akbarland taking the lead after 25 mins. [Cut to clip of the goal] 15 minutes later, Tom Thumb scored his first international goal in a goal mouth scramble after a Ree King corner. [cut to goal] Twenty minutes into the 2nd half, Nea Hope score what would prove to be the winner, flicking home a Thumb cross with the outside of his boot.[cut to goal]
Further efforts from both sides proved futile with O'Malley, Stun and Robertson all have superb games for Halfassed.[cuts to clips of tackles by Robertson and Stun and a couple of great saves by O'Malley]
Thumb was named Man of the Match afterwards and was happy with how things had went, "I'm delighted that we were able to win and especially that I was able to play so well after the events earlier in the week {Thumb was sent-off in the Champions League game between Akbarbad City and The Cenataurs} I wanted to prove my temprement and I feel I managed that tonight."
The win sends Halfassed to the top of the group 6 qualifing table with 4 games remaining.

Kanel chronicle

Kanel Spontaneous parites erupted in the streets of Kanel last evening as it stood clear that the Bullonian national soccer team, the Snails, had claimed their first victory in the World Cup qualifiers. The Snails defeated the Pablicostan team by 2-1 in a closely played match here at the Sparvhök memorial stadium.

The Bullonian scorers were Carl-Henrik Felth (21 min), Carl Monten (67 min), and the Pablicostan goal was made by Pablo Costa (51 min).

This victory has significantly calmed the mood in Bullonien which after the losing streak was more or less riotous. It seems unlikely however that coach Gregor Jonsson will be allowed to continue coaching the team, and speculations about his replacement are still running high.

Dan Magnusson

News item from the Errinundrian Financial Review

http://afr.com/images/mast_secondary.gif
Circulation: anaemic

SHOULD BE CONSUMERS DO IT AGAIN

It's becoming a tedious tradition. Irate football supporters, angry with the creative business practices of the Ploser-Maw consortium, have, over the last three days, destroyed all 16 Ploser factories in Errinundera. Egged on by the irresponsible union organiser, sharonb, failed revolutionary, levlaf, and all-round troublemaker, swellen, the usual rioters commandeered heavy equipment and bulldozed the sites.

http://www.redflag.org.uk/frontline/six/Kollontai.jpg
(l-r) sharonb, magistrate kollontai, and swellen.

The Managing Director of the Errinundrian Chamber of Commerce and Industry, mememe, expressed his dismay at this wanton destruction. "Why can't Errinundrians be like normal people and buy televisions, stay at home (except, of course when they are slaving away for us or going shopping) and buy the things we tell them to. And the government! What are they doing? Egging on the anarchists and persecuting business, that's what. Don't they understand that the role of government is to smooth the way for giant corporations to subjugate the people? We desperately need to follow the example of the United States of America: government of big business, by big business, for big business."

Failed revolutionary, leflaf, sneered at mememe. "That's just the typical ranting of the professionally envious. First question: what percentage of the vote did the business parties manage last election.? Answer: between them the Conservative Party, the Republican Party, the Liberal Party, the Democrats, and the Labour Party managed just 5% percent of the vote.* No-one takes them seriously. Second question: who pays for the salaries of all the staff at ECCI? Answer: I don't know but Errinundrian businesses certainly can't afford it."

A bare-footed news conference was held today by the Protector of Sport, filthyl, the convenor of the EFA, mountd, and the captain of the national team, moschatuma. filthyl said that there were many questions still to be answered. "What is the role of the CEO, ploser, and the GM, cabanap, in this scam? What was the precise role of Maw Ltd? Why has ploser left the country? Why did the Protector of Trade, invidio, cut the wages of bootmakers by 3%? What gifts has he received from the nation of Quohog? Why has he left the country? Who arranged for the refugees to be turned into scabs? To answer these and many other questions we have commissioned a team of magistrates, led by kollontai, to investigate the whole sordid affair."

mountd explained the latest developments in the World Cup. "The nation of Snub Nose 38 has kindly sent their stock of microfibre gear to Errinundera but, unfortunately, it could not arrive here in time for the match. As you know we have no airports in the country so the gear has been flown to the nearest foreign airport and will be shipped down the Snowy River in time for our next match. We know which batch the Snub Nose 38 gear came from and it is definitely not made from leather."

He advised that the NSWCC sincerely wanted to avoid an Errinundrian forfeiture and proposed that the match against Europa Brittania be postponed until the end of the qualifying series. "After consideration the BFA insisted upon the game being played or forfeited. You may think that their response was opportunism at its most blatant (after all, we beat them at their own stadium earlier in the series) but put yourselves in their shoes (non-leather I hope). What would you have done?"

"By the way," he added, "at some future date we may have to give a one-off dispensation to allow Snub Nose 38s into the country!"

moschatuma advised the press that none of the players have suffered any long-term harm from inadvertently wearing leather. "There have been rumours that prolonged exposure to leather can lead to withering of the genitals and a reduction in intelligence. Experts at the University of Milosis have pointed out that this is a classic example of confusing cause and effect. Withered genitals and low intelligence are two of the main causes why people want to wear leather. You have to admit, it's a strange world we live in. Why would anyone have a fetish for leather? Polyester is so much better. That aside, we are looking forward to visiting LordSquall for our next match. We have not beaten them in three encounters. We are determined to make amends for these and the forfeited game and will be sending a full strength side."

*The major winners in the last election were The Scandinavian Paradise Party 38%, Greens 31%, Socialists 25%.

Matchday 7 results are gonna be posted 12:00 monday GMT :)

NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!
I want them NOW damnit! :P

You can generate them AS ;)

Well, looks like the NS server's back online. This will push the schedule back a couple of days. Perhaps we should draft a contingency plan centering on the nswcc site to allow the Cup to continue during NS server outages?

I agree. Should make sure that updates are conducted simultaneously on both sites, and that EVERYONE knows about the NSWCC site. And we have to make sure someone is in charge of news.....

Ahhhhhh.....it finally dawns.

How come I didn't know wcc7? had started......thinks.....could be coz i was on holiday...but i got back ages ago....hmmmmmmmmmmmmm....*eventually comes to the conclusion that she's either blind or is just thick*

Wow! go team! 5 wins....this is looking good. I will do a match report soon i hope...hehe

From this mornings "Scuttlebutt"

World Cup Qualifying Delayed
The seventh set of qualifying matches for World Cup 7 have been delayed. While there has been no official announcement as to the cause of the delay, there is much speculation that it is in some way related to the recent forfeit by Errinundera to Europa Brittania of their sixth qualifying match. Rumor is that the World Cup Committee was not prepared for such an eventuality, and have delayed round seven until a set of procedures to follow for forfeitures are developed an emplaced.

Failure of New Communications Systems
Once again the Borderlands of Snub Nose 38 were completely cut off from the outside world by a communications systems failure. While communications have been partially restablished, it may be quite some time before complete restoration of normal communications. The Minister of Commercial Communications, Public Communications, and Oreos has been excommunicated. He was last seen being "helped" onto a bus to the Island of Elba by the Sheriff of Remington County.
On his inauguration, the new Minister was handed a ticket to Elba dated two weeks into the future. Some believe this was a subtle hint to restore communications quickly.

Mysterious Malady Fells Many Ministers
The Ministry of Health, Mining, and Obscure Rituals today announced that 90 percent of Snub Nose 38s appointed Ministers are in Saint Swithins Hospital suffering from a mysterious malady. They have all been isolated in the Intensive Stupidity Ward until the exact nature of the disease, and whether or not it is contagious, has been determined. This may have a deliterious effect on the day to day operations of the government. Or, as one wag noted, it may actually improve government operations.

ive already ran the results, theyre sitting on my computer right now, but im posting them 2mora :p

ive already ran the results, theyre sitting on my computer right now, but im posting them 2mora :p
This is worse than blackmail. You've got what we want, and we can't get it from you.

OOC: Between the "mysterious malady" that hit our ministers (I put my stupid back out, and can't sit at the computer very long), and a scheduled week long inspection of my office at work, postings from the SN38 Ministers et al will be drastsically reduced for a while.

ive already ran the results, theyre sitting on my computer right now, but im posting them 2mora :p

Bitch :P

I should post the results myself....

Odd Series of Disasters Delay World Cup Qualifying

COLUMBIA, FD -- Reports from around the world have come in to the Bedistan Weather and Atmosphere Administration (BWAA) about a strange series of disasters that have apparently hit each and every nation playing host to a seventh-round World Cup 7 qualifying match.

The match against Middleton, scheduled to be played at Holmes Stadium this past Friday, was cancelled after a massive rainstorm planted itself over the entire southern half of Bedistan. This storm finally dissipated about two hours ago, but not before dumping a full 40 inches of rain on the stadium.

This match, as well as the other seventh-round qualifying matches, is expected to go ahead as soon as a specially trained team of Audioslavians reaches the stadium and removes the water. When asked why we could not drain the stadium ourselves, President Mark Stevens refused to comment.

[OOC: Bah, I've been waiting for two days already for matchday 7 results! Why another day?]

Giant Chicken Ruins Everything
Oglethorpian Causing, Experts Say

Byrana - Today in Byrana, a match in Kingsford qualifying was scheduled to take place against Bardai, whom Kingsford beat 1-0 in Bardai. However, right before opening kickoff, a man in a giant chicken suit ran out on the field and stole the ball. Security tried to stop him, but he seemed to be skilled at Martial Arts and was not able to be stopped.
"It was clear by the way the chicken ran that he was from Oglethorpia. Why he would do this? I don't know. Maybe he was also a communist!" Mascot expert Julius Mustard told us today.
Whatever the cause was, he was certainly not a mascot for either team.

Air Paripana Flight Struck by Lightning
COMMERCE HEIGHTS, CH (12/31/99 NME) - Today, an empty 767 airplane owned by Air Paripana was struck by lightning as it left Aquilla. The plane was scheduled to transport the Commerce Heights Bulldogs (1-3-2) to Praetorian Rome (2-1-3) for their World Cup qualifier match there. The entire series of matches scheduled for Day 7 was moved up one day due to similar incidents in other countries. Coach Frank Saito said that the delay will allow the Bulldogs to be better prepared for the match and not let the 3-0 shutout Praetorian Rome scored in the middle of Commerce Heights City happen again. Dalen Quaice, a member of the PariMedia Board of Directors, said that these disasters must not be a pure coincidence - someone, probably an Audioslavian, must have created these events on purpose to delay the Cup. :P

News item from the Errinundrian Financial Review

http://afr.com/images/mast_secondary.gif
Circulation: anaemic

SHOULD BE CONSUMERS DO IT AGAIN

It's becoming a tedious tradition. Irate football supporters, angry with the creative business practices of the Ploser-Maw consortium, have, over the last three days, destroyed all 16 Ploser factories in Errinundera. Egged on by the irresponsible union organiser, sharonb, failed revolutionary, levlaf, and all-round troublemaker, swellen, the usual rioters commandeered heavy equipment and bulldozed the sites.

http://www.redflag.org.uk/frontline/six/Kollontai.jpg
(l-r) sharonb, magistrate kollontai, and swellen.

The Managing Director of the Errinundrian Chamber of Commerce and Industry, mememe, expressed his dismay at this wanton destruction. "Why can't Errinundrians be like normal people and buy televisions, stay at home (except, of course when they are slaving away for us or going shopping) and buy the things we tell them to. And the government! What are they doing? Egging on the anarchists and persecuting business, that's what. Don't they understand that the role of government is to smooth the way for giant corporations to subjugate the people? We desperately need to follow the example of the United States of America: government of big business, by big business, for big business."

Failed revolutionary, leflaf, sneered at mememe. "That's just the typical ranting of the professionally envious. First question: what percentage of the vote did the business parties manage last election.? Answer: between them the Conservative Party, the Republican Party, the Liberal Party, the Democrats, and the Labour Party managed just 5% percent of the vote.* No-one takes them seriously. Second question: who pays for the salaries of all the staff at ECCI? Answer: I don't know but Errinundrian businesses certainly can't afford it."

A bare-footed news conference was held today by the Protector of Sport, filthyl, the convenor of the EFA, mountd, and the captain of the national team, moschatuma. filthyl said that there were many questions still to be answered. "What is the role of the CEO, ploser, and the GM, cabanap, in this scam? What was the precise role of Maw Ltd? Why has ploser left the country? Why did the Protector of Trade, invidio, cut the wages of bootmakers by 3%? What gifts has he received from the nation of Quohog? Why has he left the country? Who arranged for the refugees to be turned into scabs? To answer these and many other questions we have commissioned a team of magistrates, led by kollontai, to investigate the whole sordid affair."

mountd explained the latest developments in the World Cup. "The nation of Snub Nose 38 has kindly sent their stock of microfibre gear to Errinundera but, unfortunately, it could not arrive here in time for the match. As you know we have no airports in the country so the gear has been flown to the nearest foreign airport and will be shipped down the Snowy River in time for our next match. We know which batch the Snub Nose 38 gear came from and it is definitely not made from leather."

He advised that the NSWCC sincerely wanted to avoid an Errinundrian forfeiture and proposed that the match against Europa Brittania be postponed until the end of the qualifying series. "After consideration the BFA insisted upon the game being played or forfeited. You may think that their response was opportunism at its most blatant (after all, we beat them at their own stadium earlier in the series) but put yourselves in their shoes (non-leather I hope). What would you have done?"

"By the way," he added, "at some future date we may have to give a one-off dispensation to allow Snub Nose 38s into the country!"

moschatuma advised the press that none of the players have suffered any long-term harm from inadvertently wearing leather. "There have been rumours that prolonged exposure to leather can lead to withering of the genitals and a reduction in intelligence. Experts at the University of Milosis have pointed out that this is a classic example of confusing cause and effect. Withered genitals and low intelligence are two of the main causes why people want to wear leather. You have to admit, it's a strange world we live in. Why would anyone have a fetish for leather? Polyester is so much better. That aside, we are looking forward to visiting LordSquall for our next match. We have not beaten them in three encounters. We are determined to make amends for these and the forfeited game and will be sending a full strength side."

*The major winners in the last election were The Scandinavian Paradise Party 38%, Greens 31%, Socialists 25%.

Ted Ranger: Welcome, my name is Ted Rangers, and this is The World Today. The top news comes from Errinundera, where Ploser Microfibres, who recently entered into a business deal with our own Maw Ltd., has been selling actual leather products as opposed to the microfibre substitute they claimed. But, before we go into greater depth, the Minister of Trade and the Economy has volunteered to say a few brief words on the issue of environmentalism which is the driving force behind much of what is currently occurring. Minister Katherine Servetus…

Minister of Trade and the Economy: Thank you. As some of you may or may not be aware, many nations view us with suspicion because we are not considered an environmentally friendly nation. Many foreigners believe that we sell out to the large corporations at the expense of the people. Things couldn’t be farther from the truth. The fact of the matter is that corporations have much less influence here than they do in many other nations. What other countries do is allow their businesses to buy land or use resources for dirt cheap, but then put up laws that force the companies to clean up a bit after themselves. This often means that companies will buy land or resources for a fraction of their actual value, and then skip out of town instead of paying for minimal clean-ups. We do things differently. If a corporation wants to buy government land, they are forced to not only pay full value for the land, but also give us a share of the profits. While we might not have the environmental controls of other nations, we do profit from the exchange much more because we force the companies to pay what any other individual would pay. The reason for environmental laws is so that citizens can get their cut of the national resources. In Quohog, we force companies to use actual free market as opposed to socialistic economic practices. We don’t need environmental laws because the companies are not stealing the resources from us, they are paying for the materials on free market deals. The Errinunderans have had bad experiences with government that gave away their resources without the citizens benefiting, which led to their current practices of extreme environmentalism. So, to understand the Errinunderan mind, one must understand that environmental issues basically mean mass, multi-trillion dollar theft to them, and they react accordingly.

Ted: Thank you minister, that was very informative. We now take you to Mar Baxxy, the leader of the Maw Ltd.’s delegation to Errinundera. Mr. Baxxy, could you give us a bit more information about the current situation?

Mar Baxxy: It would be my pleasure. First, I want to say that both Ploser Ltd. And Errinundera's Protector of Trade, invidio, have been very supportive. Around the time when we brought our technique to their factories, invidio lowered Fanny Moo’s shoemakers fees by 3%. This led to a general strike, a strike in which the workers in the Ploser factory joined in a sympathy walk-out. Since there was no contract dispute at our factory, we decided to hire temporary workers until the old workers felt that they could come back. That was when it hit the fan. The factory union started a nationwide protest against Ploser Ltd. Products! I mean, we were not even trying to fire the workers, but they did this anyways! However, despite the loss of local revenue, Ploser was still doing very well. Part of the reason for the creation of the our Maw-Ploser merger was that we had the experience, know-how, and techniques to produce their microfibre on the international level. So they brought the actual product and the Ploser name, and we brought everything else. Our partnership has also been an instant success, with profits going up 117% for Ploser in the last month, even with the nation-wide protests. With a rapidly expanding foreign market, we don’t even really need Errinundera as a market.

Ted: Yes, but what about the recent discovery that all of the foreign made microfibre products were actually made from leather? There have been reports that the real “innovative method to develop microfibre inexpensively” was simply to use real leather.

Mar Baxxy: That is not true at all. Our factory in Manny Moo was using our method. They were still producing the microfibre. Actually, the reason for the leather products was because of an obscure Errinunderan law. After Nestle Errinundera was driven out of business because of its practices in third world nations, a law was passed which forced any company to form a merger with an international corporation, such as Maw Ltd., to use a list of third-world small business as a third partner in the deal. There is a lot of red tape, but it basically forces any such merger to equally profit these poor third world nations through small and local businesses. So, after we signed on the dotted line, we received a list of acceptable businesses, and we visited them to find if any could handle our specifications for producing microfibre under Maw’s new method. Thus, we were given the role of middle-men. Although we would have preferred to handle the making of microfibre ourselves, we were bound by Errinunderan law. It appears that instead using our machines, they have sold them on the black market and were making the raw material from animal skin. Of course, if we were allowed to handle the situation personally, this never would have happened, but we were not allowed near these businesses, or allowed to transport the product. Another aspect of the law supposed to protect these small businesses from a big, bad international company. A member of the Errinunderan government was supposed to check up on these businesses to make sure things were running the way they should, but invidio told me that he had not been allowed to send anyone for reasons obscure to both of us. Of course, now that we have discovered the problem, we are setting up entirely new factories, which will produce the microfibre the way it was meant to be. We are even providing immigrants with jobs there, something which might make Errinunderans happy. Yes, we are now breaking the Errinunderan law, but things are getting difficult there, and Ploser might relocate to Quohog and the Maw-Ploser merger can become permanent for all issues, not just on the microfibre issue.

Ted: Thank you very much for informing us about what is going on. The question that I, and many other citizens have, is what is happening in Errinundera right now? We’ve heard about the destruction of the factories, has a general civil war broken out?

Mar Baxxy: (laughing) NO! What you must understand is that the civil disobedience occurring in Errinundera is actually encouraged by the government.

Ted: You cannot be serious!

Mar Baxxy: But I am. The Errinunderan government keeps control by using occasional riots and disturbances such as this to beat back any people with different opinions. For example: Ploser Ltd.’s CEO, ploser, and the GM, cabanap were some of the leading thinkers of the capitalist school of thought in Errinundera. They were represented by the Managing Director of the Errinundrian Chamber of Commerce and Industry, mememe, and by the Protector of Trade invidious. These riots allow the government to forcefully suppress these dissidents. There is ample evidence that sharonb, levlaf, and swellen, the main forces behind the recent destruction are high members of the Scandinavian Paradise party, the socialist party, and the green party respectively. Since those three groups control the government and most of the news outlets, it is obvious that the government is simply following the time-honored tradition of tyrants everywhere by making their voice the ONLY voice. Although Ploser Ltd. Has lost their 16 Errinunderan factories, they will still be able to build new factories elsewhere with less stringent limitations. We were actually considering giving up on the Errinunderan market, it is just more trouble then it is worth.

Ted: Well, thanks once again for your time. That was Mar Baxxy, the leader of Mar Ltd.’s former delegation to Errinundera. We now have Quohog Information Minister Baanes Dosti. Minister Dosti, what is our official government response to the latest Errinunderan incident?

Baanes Dosti: This case is actually much more serious than the incident with longipesp's copy of "The New Reader in 19th and 20th Century Spanish Anarchism." While that was a simple matter of finding the person responsible, and then offering due redress, this situation has involved an attack on a company which is now a part of Maw Ltd., a Quohog company. That means that the 16 factories destroyed were factories under the control of a Quohog company. This is a serous attack on our interests. Although Queen Lois and Prime Minister and Consort Peter have not considered war as an option, we are looking into a variety of other responses. We will get back to you later tonight with the full government response to this.

Ted: Thank you very much Minister. This is Ted Granger, and this has been a brief presentation of The World Today. We will be back tonight with Quohog’s response, and with what this series of events means in terms of Quohog-Errinunderan relations, already fragile at best.

<<LEINN>>
<<BREAKING NEWS>>

<<MAJOR POWER OUTAGE IN CCL DELAYS LIVERPOOL ENGLAND - INTERGALLACTIC HELL WC 7 SEVENTH ROUND QUALIFYING MATCH>>

Hello, this is Josh Hinar with Breaking News. Sorry to interrupt regular programming. The seventh leg of the World Cup Seven Qualifying in all countries have been delayed due to different reasons, forcing the WCC to popstpone all seventh-round matches by three days. Jenna Horales has more from Total n Utter Insanity.
*REPORT*
Major blackouts in most part of Veneratio Heartland, including Liverpool England, have postponed the LE-Intergallactic Hell match by three days. However, the World Cup Committee seems to have its own reasons. Some people are saying that the delay could be linked to the Errinunderan forfeit of their match against Europa Brittania, while others think that it may have to do with giant chickens in Kingsford, major storms in Bedistan, and lightning in Commerce Heights. The true reason for the delay is unknown at this point, and the Liverpool England Federation (International) Football, or LEFIF, the subordinate of the LEIFC (LE International Football Confederation), who oversee club and national matches, are unwilling to give a reason for the LE delay. However, this reason has now come to light, excuse the bad joke considering the blackout. Jenna Horales, LEINN, reporting from Total n Utter Insanity.

horrible coicidence.... I am an Aberdonian myself

I was joking though, I am a fan of the Jags myself.

Well, it stopped me getting beaten up by the Old Firm supporters... they just pointed and laughed, really.

Jenna Horales, LEINN, reporting from Total n Utter Insanity.

Huh? Why was she reporting from here?

heh, i just tg'd the results to half the teams before i remembered that you dont need to tg results in the qualifiers :/ lol

Here hey are:

Group 1:
Rhaken Kull 4-4 Ariddia
Bedistan 2-0 Middleton
The Republic of Canada 2-2 Etria

Group 2
Pavesia 1-3 Runaway Moose
Liverpool England 4-1 Intergallactic Hell
Praetorian Rome 0-2 Commerce Heights

Group 3
Alasdair I Frosticus 0-1 Tanah Burung
Ravenspire 3-1 Nikea
Trafari 3-0 Freedom Country

Group 4
Aquilla 2-2 Dark Outcasts
One Red Dot 4-1 Grand master Mark
Pablicosta 0-3 Bullonien

Group 5
LordSquall 1-3 Errinundera
Europa Brittania 1-0 Kaze Progressa
Sliponia 1-2 DePaul

Group 6
Tha Machine 0-4 Halfassedstates
Akbarland 2-1 Melita and Gaulos
The Promise of Joshua 1-0 Estiv

Group 7
Bardai 0-2 Kingsford
Busby 4-0 North Russia
Davidus Voldemort 1-1 GnOoLoCoPeLep

Group 8
The Lowland Clans 2-4 Lunatic Goofballs
Pure Evil 3-1 Katimarie
Sazland 1-3 Demonic Beings

Group 9
Mezitzia 3-6 Oglethorpia
Giant Zucchini 2-1 Krieland
Terranos 2-1 ENRG

Group 10
Dyelli Beybi 0-3 Quohog
The Belmore Family 5-1 New-Persia
The Weegies 1-2 Fart wars

Group 11
Antaeus Rising 0-3 Snub Nose 38
Gesamtkuntswerk 5-2 Nonexistentcitygrad
Yatsumica 0-1 Gilmeecia

Group 12
Alhana Catherine 2-3 Squornshelous
Malundar 5-1 Nintendania
West Ariddia 0-3 Freedomnessity

Group 13
Christofi 3-1 Spaam
Dennisov 4-0 Jacktazea
Ribenia 0-1 Crimina

Group 14
Eauz 0-5 Svecia
Haraki 4-0 Kerla
South euroland 2-3 Eisen Engel

Group 15
Bizarro 0-1 Total n Utter Insanity
Timway 3-3 Oddslavo
Zihkav 1-3 God Squad

On our 4th attempt Errinundera has finally beaten LordSquall in a flurry of first half goals. The tally so far is 1 win, 2 draws, 1 loss.

Lordsqall 1 Errinundera 3
Err Goals: antarcticad (19 & 34) longipesp (17)
Err Best: antarcticad, longipesp, moschatuma

[code:1:8c71c39e3d]
Group 5 P W D L F A GD PTS
Europa Brittania 7 6 0 1 15 2 +13 18
Errinundera 7 4 1 2 9 5 +4 13
LordSquall 7 3 2 2 16 14 +2 11
DePaul 7 3 1 3 15 15 0 10
Sliponia 7 1 1 5 8 17 -9 4
Kaze Progressa 7 1 1 5 10 20 -10 4
[/code:1:8c71c39e3d]

Last 3 matches:
Errinundera v DePaul
Kaze Progressa v Errinundera
Errinundera v Sliponia

heh, i just tg'd the results to half the teams before i remembered that you dont need to tg results in the qualifiers :/ lol

Group 7
Yentrof 1-1 GnOoLoCoPeLep

Yentrof :?: :?: :?:

HSMG News at 9
.....................................
.....................................
and in sport today, the Halfassedstates side played their 7th round qualifing match against Tha Machine. The match had been delayed from yesterday after a power failure at the stadium just 30 mins before the sheduled kickoff had left the ground without floodlighting.

When the game got underway, Halfassed wasted no more time, Wallace scoring the first after 3mins. A slip by the opposing centre back leaving him with a 1-on-1 that he wasn't going to miss
[cut to a clip of the goal.]
5 minutes later, Hope added a second when he reacted quickest after a Ree King free kick came back off the cross bar.
[cut to goal 2]
With less than 10mins gone, Halfassed were cruising and unfortunatly most of the players knew it - the rest of the half being pretty dull until Tha Machine forced an excellent save out of O'Malley shortly before half time.
[shows the save]
With the crowd getting involved a bit more, Tha Machine pressed forward to try and get back in the match. Unfortunatly, this allowed Wallace what he loves most, space on the counter, and seconds into injury time, he broke down the left and cut inside the covering defender, before rolling the ball to Hope who slammed it home.
[shows just that]
5 minutes into the second half, Lee King played a neat 1-2 with Samuelsson, before slipping an inch prefect pass behind the last defender and into the stride of Wallace, who cooly rounded the advancing keeper and slotted the ball into the empty net.
[cut to the final goal]
Final score: Tha Machine 0 Halfassedstates 4

NEWSFLASH:

Giant Zucchini got back to winning ways, defeating Krieland 2-1 in the postponed World Cup qualifier. The match was delayed by 3 days as the ever unpredictable Machterstrassefurtermorgannachttunggutsprechenbuchlungweighetvolkshvargenshtickshnoff could not find his underpants. "It is my strong belief that a strong defence is the key to winning. That is why I will not step out of the dressing-room until my rear is secure." After 3 days of frantic searching, he eventually settled with a bathroom towel. Regardless of this rather queer incident, the Zucchinis managed to pull off a win, Phoot and Zonk scoring in each half respectively, while Plaat could not hold off a blistering shot from Krieland. Head Coach Mr Hurr, "I think this is a good result considering the circumstances. We will continue to improve and win games, which is our immediate priority after finding Machterstrassefurtermorgannachttunggutsprechenbuchlungweighetvolkshvargenshtickshnoff's underpants."

Union Strikes Stopped Games Temporarily, ORD Wins After 2 Foot High Lawn Cut

A nationwide strike by several unions from various occupations delayed the World Cup in ORD for a few days, causing much chaos and mayhem. However, the unions decided to stop the strikes after their demands were met including cutting the pay of PM Borich Natodrid's pay by 15%.

Back to Sports News: ORD got another win from Grand master Mark on the 7th day of WC7 after the Mowers Union decided to call a short truce and mowed the under-utilised Mount Dorona Stadium.

Although the match went on without much hype as the Ticket Sales Union was also on strike, the match still went on smoothly as ORD won 4-1.

Yesterday, at Dark Outcast, ORD lost to them again with a wider goal difference at a 0-2 loss. Head Coach Alvin Ker is quite disappointed with their performance there as he felt that they could have done better although they had lost to them earlier on.

The next match will be against Pablicosta at Queen Tracy Stadium on Day 8. Head Advisor Christopher Yorkshin says that they have pushed memories of Dark Outcast behind them and is moving forward to get more wins to reach the Group Stage.

Let's see the Group 4 Qualifying Table:
[code:1:8fd7b7b0c3]
Group 4 P W D L F A GD T
15 Dark Outcasts 7 6 1 0 16 4 12 19
21 One Red Dot 7 5 0 2 18 5 13 15
51 Aquilla 7 3 2 2 13 14 -1 11
Grand master Mark 7 2 1 4 9 18 -9 7
Bullonien 7 2 0 5 6 11 -5 6
Pablicosta 7 0 2 5 8 18 -10 2
[/code:1:8fd7b7b0c3]

With only three games left to play, it looks like Pablicosta has been denied entry to the World Cup. Even with three wins, they still get 11 points.

Dark Outcast can now go ahead and lose all the games they want as now, at 19 points, third place Aquilla would not be able to reach them, even with three wins. Congratulations to Dark Outcast.

As for us, ORD, we will have to win all three matches to proceed. Aquilla would be a serious contender if they win their next two matches. We will be going against them on the last day.

Commerce Heights Bulldogs Within Striking Distance of Cup
PRAETORIAN ROME (1/1/100 NME) - Today, the CH Bulldogs (2-3-2) defeated Praetorian Rome (2-1-4) in an exciting 2-0 shutout on their home field. The Bulldogs were fully prepared to get the win for their country after being blown out by Praetorian Rome 3-0 at Maxisoft Stadium in CH, and then having an extra day to practice before the next match. The win has put Commerce Heights in third place in Group 2, only 4 points behind Liverpool England for the valuable spot in the Cup.
[code:1:47896bdc2c]Group 2 P W D L F A GD Points
Runaway Moose 7 4 2 1 10 4 6 14
Liverpool England 7 4 1 2 18 9 9 13
Commerce Heights 7 2 3 2 11 12 -1 9
Pavesia 7 2 2 3 14 17 -3 8
Praetorian Rome 7 2 1 4 8 12 -4 7
Intergallactic Hell 7 2 1 4 9 16 -7 7[/code:1:47896bdc2c]
Commerce Heights' next game will be at Runaway Moose, followed by home games against Liverpool England and Intergallactic Hell to finish the qualifiers. Since CH will need 5 more points than Liverpool England in the next 3 games to advance to the Cup, they will need to defeat Liverpool England. LE would also have to lose one of its other 2 games, and CH would have to win 1 of its other games and perform at least as well as LE in the third game. The new third-place ranking is expected to boost the confidence of the Bulldogs, and the earlier win over 18th-ranked Runaway Moose (4-2-1) has sold more tickets to Manhattanites than expected for tomorrow's second match between the teams.

Possible Wild Card Entry

Here in the NationStates World, nations rise and nations fall. Since the beginning of the World Cup Qualifiers, no less than 4 nations have fallen. With that fact, should any of those nations finish in the top two of any group, this will open up a wild card entry, for the highest rankes nation that does not make it into the top two. Etria, Freedomnessity, North Russia, and Praetorian Rome have all fallen since the registration for this cup, and Freedomnessity, in group 12, stands a real chance of finishing in the top two, being only 2 points away from second spot. Should they finish in the top two, this will be a much lauded opportunity for any teams that might be unlucky in the qualifiers, like Malundar, Bedistan, or Spaam, who all have a real chance of missing out. With 3 matches to go, time will tell if any team is feeling lucky, punk.

Possible Wild Card Entry

Here in the NationStates World, nations rise and nations fall. Since the beginning of the World Cup Qualifiers, no less than 4 nations have fallen. With that fact, should any of those nations finish in the top two of any group, this will open up a wild card entry, for the highest rankes nation that does not make it into the top two. Etria, Freedomnessity, North Russia, and Praetorian Rome have all fallen since the registration for this cup, and Freedomnessity, in group 12, stands a real chance of finishing in the top two, being only 2 points away from second spot. Should they finish in the top two, this will be a much lauded opportunity for any teams that might be unlucky in the qualifiers, like Malundar, Bedistan, or Spaam, who all have a real chance of missing out. With 3 matches to go, time will tell if any team is feeling lucky, punk.

In the past, we've allowed teams from dead nations to continue-- I recall that happening with Altamira recently. Al Quds was eliminated because they weren't already playing qualifiers at the time that they ceased to exist. So I'd be inclined to let anyone who makes it to the Cup play, even if their homeland has fallen into the sea. WCC members want to weigh in?

GVN:

In World Cup news today, the Gesamtkuntswerk Sturms show newcomer Nonexistantcitygrad what it means to be a qualifying team, decimating their opponents in a blitzkreig 5-2 game. Though Nonexistantcitygrad has had an extraordinary season to the point, the Sturms have trained hard for this game, determined to show that they'll need more than luck to defeat the Sturms the second time arond. Up 2-0 in the first half, favourite Trazom was injured during play, forcing his removal from the game. Doctors have yet to give a definite timetable for recovery, but it looks like he'll be sitting out the rest of the qualifying round, at best. Nonexistantcitygrad took advantage of the momentary weakness, tying up the game before the half was up. Driven by the injury of their comrade as well as to put pay to their opponent, the Sturms played an amazing game the second half, allowing the opponent only seven minutes in Sturm territory over the course of the second half. The astounding attack fervor of the Sturms yielded three swift goals before the game was up, each causing a greater explosion in the crowd than the last. The Sturms look forward to the rest of the qualifiers, and prepare for the next round.

[code:1:b7be10907f]
Group 11 P W D L F A GD PTS
Snub Nose 38 7 6 1 0 22 1 +21 19
Nonexistentcitygrad 7 5 0 2 16 12 +4 15
Gesamtkuntswerk 7 3 1 3 13 12 +1 10
Gilmeecia 7 3 1 3 10 16 -6 10
Antaeus Rising 7 1 2 4 6 11 -5 5
Yatsumica 7 0 1 6 2 17 -15 1
[/code:1:b7be10907f]

Kickfooters Coach announces breakthrough
Gilmeecia

Gilmeecia Kickfooters national football club coach Bi Kikere today announced a breakthrough in football coaching technique. "After months of R&D, I've come up with a formula that actually allows me to inject even substandard brains with advanced football knowledge," said Coach Kikere. The technique, officially named the "Kikere Technique" but known informally in the footballing community as the "Kikere Headcracker" and among members of the Kickfooters squad as the "Big Head Ouchie," involves smacking players in the head with a rock every time they do, say, or think something stupid.

"I've gotta tell you, my arm's tired," said Kikere after a four-hour practice session in which she smacked an estimated 92 heads with three different rocks. "But it's all worth it at day's end when I ask Gilgo Gobbins whether it's permissible to cross behind the last defender when the ball is still at midfield, and instead of saying 'Huh?' he says, 'No ma'am!'"

The technique has paid off with back-to-back wins against the crappiest team in group 11, winless whipping-children Yatsumica. Whether the technique will conitnue to pay dividends against real teams remains to be seen.

[code:1:7f87456b20]
Group 4 P W D L F A GD T
15 Dark Outcasts 7 6 1 0 16 4 12 19
21 One Red Dot 7 5 0 2 18 5 13 15
51 Aquilla 7 3 2 2 13 14 -1 11
[/code:1:7f87456b20]

Dark Outcast can now go ahead and lose all the games they want as now, at 19 points, third place Aquilla would not be able to reach them, even with three wins. Congratulations to Dark Outcast.

While DO are almost certain to qualify, they are not yet a lock (or as we say in Lemmitania, they have not clinched a spot). With three points awarded for a win, Aquilla could still overtake them.

On the WCC rankings page it says
29 The Belmore Family
Now, I am sure I am ranked 28.

On the WCC rankings page it says
29 The Belmore Family
Now, I am sure I am ranked 28.

Everyone's bumped up one for WC7 because the top-ranked team withdrew. So while TBF is technically ranked 29th in the world, you are ranked 28th for WC7 purposes.

Qualifying Proceeds in Indoor Facility

TICONDEROGA, PA -- While the Audioslavian crew has at last arrived at Holmes Stadium, they have been experiencing some difficulty at draining the 40 inches of rain that fell onto the field this weekend. Eager to allow qualifying to continue, the match against Middleton was moved to an indoor facility in the town of Ticonderoga, about twelve miles west of Columbia. After a brief dispute with the Paruvia State Police regarding the legality of the event, the match got underway this morning.

The Middleton team had been worn down quite a bit from having to wait three days in a foreign land for the match to begin, and it certainly showed. The players seemed to have little spirit, and Bedistan star forward Johnny Lewis sent two very easy shots into the opposing net during the first half. The Middletonians were unable to respond in kind.

In other news, Rhaken Kull and Ariddia tied their match today 4-4. This brings the Lions closer to second-place Rhaken Kull in the group standings:

1. [8] Ariddia [19 points]
2. [94] Rhaken Kull [13 points]
3. [24] Bedistan [12 points]
4. The Republic of Canada [8 points]
5. Middleton [6 points]
6. Etria [2 points]

Ariddia is almost totally assured of qualifying at this point, so the main competition is between Bedistan and Rhaken Kull. Both teams have two upcoming matches against unranked opponents, and the final match -- where these two competitors face off at Holmes Stadium -- will most likely decide who moves on.

Final score:
Bedistan 2 [Lewis 11, 39]
Middleton 0

Chronal Research Accident Sends Nation 3 Days Forward

Tir Eselyn, Ravenspire (AP) -- The Scientific Research Council of Ravenspire sheepishly announced earlier today that an "unforeseen development" related to the newly-discovered time-carrying particle, the chronon, had resulted in the entire nation moving three days into the future. "Actually," said Research Council chief Charlton Black, "to be more precise, the concentration of chronons caused time to contract, so that what seemed like a few minutes for Ravenspire was in fact three days to the outside world." An investigation of the chronon containment method continues.

Ravens Widen Lead

In the seventh qualifying game of the World Cup, which, fortuitously, was delayed for three days owing to various causes unrelated to chronal research, the Ravenspire team continued its winning streak, earning a 3-1 victory over Nikea.

"On paper, it looks like a comfortable victory," said striker Kaede Kitsuki, who scored the Ravens' first goal. "But on the field, it wasn't an easy match. After Nikea equalized the score in the first half, it stayed there until the end." The other goals came after the 80-minute mark, on a penalty kick by newcomer Arawn Frost and a last-minute desperation attempt by Zhen Sui-Ling that slipped in just before the clock ran out.

The Nikean goal is the first scored against Ravenspire since the initial qualifying match, and ends keeper Autumn Mistmarch's streak of scoreless games at five, a personal best.

The Ravens' chief rivals in the group, the Tanah Burung Crocodiles, also won their match, but their 1-0 score means that Ravenspire's goal differential, and therefore its technical lead on the charts, has increased by one goal.

New hopefuls Freedom Country suffered a devastating setback when they were routed 3-0 by the Trafari squad. Trafari, which had suffered six straight losses prior to today's game, also scored more goals against Freedom Country today than they had through the entire previous competition. While not mathematically eliminated, a five-point gap means that their chances are not good unless they manage to defeat both Ravenspire and Tanah Burung during the remaining three games.

Goals: Kaede Kitsuki (22), Arawn Frost (79), Zhen Sui-Ling (89)

[code:1:6939abb017]
Group 11 P W D L F A GD PTS
Ravenspire 7 5 2 0 13 3 +10 17
Tanah Burung 7 5 2 0 11 3 +8 17
Freedom Country 7 4 0 3 8 10 -2 12
Nikea 7 2 1 4 7 9 -2 7
Alisdair I Frosticus 7 1 1 5 5 11 -6 4
Trafari 7 1 0 6 5 13 -8 3
[/code:1:6939abb017]

Narrow Win Maintains Brittanian Winning Ways


A slim 1-0 win against Kaze Progressa this afternoon at New Providence Park sent Brittania clear at the top of Group Five on Eighteen Points. The only goal of the game came shortly after the interval, when a fierce Winter Drive came back off the crossbar, and fell for Danny McHilton to rocket in from ten yards out to give Brittania the lead.

Suprisingly, New Providence Park, home of FC Atlantis proved to be an inspiration for the Progressa team, whom played a far superior game to the previous 4-0 thrashing when the sides met away.

Head coach Jarvis Smith added after the game-

"I'm pleased with the result. Kaze definitley improved their game since last we met, and found their defence absolutley impenetrable until a half chance was converted by Danny [McHilton]. Sometimes even the best teams in the world have to grind out results, and we've done that today. At the end of the day I'm happy with three points."


FINAL SCORE-


Europa Brittania 1 Kaze Progressa 0

McHilton 47



New Providence Park
Attendance- 70,992.

Match Official- J. Brines

(TnUI: Why was she reporting from here?)
TnUI, its cos here in LE 65% of us follow your matches as well.

Well, that 5-1 win certainly helped things along.

(TnUI: Why was she reporting from here?)
TnUI, its cos here in LE 65% of us follow your matches as well.

of course, its a little-known fact that roughly 64-66% of LE's population are homosexuals

Possible Wild Card Entry

Here in the NationStates World, nations rise and nations fall. Since the beginning of the World Cup Qualifiers, no less than 4 nations have fallen. With that fact, should any of those nations finish in the top two of any group, this will open up a wild card entry, for the highest rankes nation that does not make it into the top two. Etria, Freedomnessity, North Russia, and Praetorian Rome have all fallen since the registration for this cup, and Freedomnessity, in group 12, stands a real chance of finishing in the top two, being only 2 points away from second spot. Should they finish in the top two, this will be a much lauded opportunity for any teams that might be unlucky in the qualifiers, like Malundar, Bedistan, or Spaam, who all have a real chance of missing out. With 3 matches to go, time will tell if any team is feeling lucky, punk.

In the past, we've allowed teams from dead nations to continue-- I recall that happening with Altamira recently. Al Quds was eliminated because they weren't already playing qualifiers at the time that they ceased to exist. So I'd be inclined to let anyone who makes it to the Cup play, even if their homeland has fallen into the sea. WCC members want to weigh in?

Hosts' call, really. You're right, extinct teams have been allowed to play on (we were eliminated in WC3 by a country that ahd already ceased to exist, and Altamira died like you say). On the other hand, it's also become traditional to set up a wild-card route to qualification for Bedistan....

---

CROCS DEFEAT IMAGINARY TEAM WITH LONG NAME

During their trip to the dreamed realm of Alasdair I Frosticus, the Crocodiles fell into a time warp and then fell asleep. No harm though, as they won the match 1-0 on a goal by Wim van Esterik. "Ravenspire can have top spot," said coach Guntur Ruak. "We'll be quite happy with qualifying. Undefeated, hopefully."

ANOTHER GORILLAFOOT ARRIVES

With the team in another dimension, football fans focussed their attention on the arrival of this year's Errinundrian exchange footballer, sasquatchd. Platforms anchored to the trees in the village of Findabaya were not big enough to accomodate all the people who wanted to watch the young prospect's first practice, so special platforms were suspended from hot-air balloons above the village. The exchange programme has already started to bear fruit: graduate codith made the Errinundera national squad and has shown promise, while Canabe Livit, who learned her skills in Ellery Camp, already has two goals for the Tanah Burung nationals.

"It's nice to be here, things are getting crazy back home, I'm glad to be able to focus on the game," sasquatchd said, after being mobbed by several hundred fans wanting to be photographed next to the young man from the country locals variously refer to as Pretty Gorillia, Big Long Foot Country, or Hairy Tree Wonderland.

Warung Agus, head of the village, had nothing but praise for the exchange programme, now entering its eighth year. But she was concerned about the news from Erriundera. "Just goes to show, never allow foreign investment," she said. "But, hey, I'm sure the Orangutans, sorry, Errinundrians, will weather this crisis with their usual style and grace."

Possible Wild Card Entry

Here in the NationStates World, nations rise and nations fall. Since the beginning of the World Cup Qualifiers, no less than 4 nations have fallen. With that fact, should any of those nations finish in the top two of any group, this will open up a wild card entry, for the highest rankes nation that does not make it into the top two. Etria, Freedomnessity, North Russia, and Praetorian Rome have all fallen since the registration for this cup, and Freedomnessity, in group 12, stands a real chance of finishing in the top two, being only 2 points away from second spot. Should they finish in the top two, this will be a much lauded opportunity for any teams that might be unlucky in the qualifiers, like Malundar, Bedistan, or Spaam, who all have a real chance of missing out. With 3 matches to go, time will tell if any team is feeling lucky, punk.

In the past, we've allowed teams from dead nations to continue-- I recall that happening with Altamira recently. Al Quds was eliminated because they weren't already playing qualifiers at the time that they ceased to exist. So I'd be inclined to let anyone who makes it to the Cup play, even if their homeland has fallen into the sea. WCC members want to weigh in?

Hosts' call, really. You're right, extinct teams have been allowed to play on (we were eliminated in WC3 by a country that had already ceased to exist). On the other hand, it's also become traditional to set up a wild-card route to qualification for Bedistan....

---

CROCS DEFEAT IMAGINARY TEAM WITH LONG NAME

During their trip to the dreamed realm of Alasdair I Frosticus, the Crocodiles fell into a time warp and then fell asleep. No harm though, as they won the match 1-0 on a goal by Wim van Esterik. "Ravenspire can have top spot," said coach Guntur Ruak. "We'll be quite happy with qualifying. Undefeated, hopefully."

ANOTHER GORILLAFOOT ARRIVES

With the team in another dimension, football fans focussed their attention on the arrival of this year's Errinundrian exchange footballer, sasquatchd. Platforms anchored to the trees in the village of Findabaya were not big enough to accomodate all the people who wanted to watch the young prospect's first practice, so special platforms were suspended from hot-air balloons above the village. The exchange programme has already started to bear fruit: graduate codith made the Errinundera national squad and has shown promise, while Canabe Livit, who learned her skills in Ellery Camp, already has two goals for the Tanah Burung nationals.

"It's nice to be here, things are getting crazy back home, I'm glad to be able to focus on the game," sasquatchd said, after being mobbed by several hundred fans wanting to be photographed next to the young man from the country locals variously refer to as Pretty Gorillia, Big Long Foot Country, or Hairy Tree Wonderland.

Warung Agus, head of the village, had nothing but praise for the exchange programme, now entering its eighth year. But she was concerned about the news from Erriundera. "Just goes to show, never allow foreign investment," she said. "But, hey, I'm sure the Orangutans, sorry, Errinundrians, will weather this crisis with their usual style and grace."

Hosts' call, really. You're right, extinct teams have been allowed to play on (we were eliminated in WC3 by a country that had already ceased to exist). On the other hand, it's also become traditional to set up a wild-card route to qualification for Bedistan....

:lol: I'm hoping I won't need it this time, but then again maybe it's just fate... ;)

I hope I overtake them

OOC: I agree, the hosts decide.

IC:
And with Ariddia's match against Rhaken Kull ending on a 4-4 draw, the team's line of victories comes to an end. While some supporters and players are disappointed, team captain Khan points out,
"This is by no means a defeat. We scored four goals against an impressive opponent, and we remain in first place in group 1. It would have been nice to have a perfect record, but the important thing is for us to do our best."

I seem to stynk at goal difference

Ladies and gentlemen, the President of the Oppressed Peoples of Gilmeecia.

President Louis Gilsterson: Arright, arright, siddown and shut yer yapping *hic!* yapping *hic!* yapping *hic!* yappers. Now I'm here to tell you *hic!* I'm here to tell you *hic!* I'm here to tell-- hah! I'm here to tell you *HIC!* I'm here to say, what a great an' glorious day it is in *hic!* here in *hic!* in *hic!*meecia. A damn good, fine fine day. Indeedsh. Now, where's Ned? Ned? Ned? Where the hell is Ned *hic!* Ned *hic!* NED!

*Hic!* Arright now, siddown arready. I said dissown! Or someshin. NOW!

Press Secretary Gig Milkerson: Eveyone's sitting, Mr. President.

Pres: Don' innerup m--*hic!* m--*hic!* me. I said. That's what I said, don' innerup' me. Where was I?

PSGM: You were shouting for the Foreign Minister, sir.

Pres: An' where is *hic!* where is *hic!* where is 'e?!

PSGM: Here he comes now, sir.

Pres: Where? I don' see anyone. Ned, do you shee anyone?

Foreign Minister Ned Itchlesby: What, Lou?

Pres: Do you shee anyone?

FM: What, Lou?

Pres: I shed, do you shee anyone!

FM: She who, Lou?

Pres: Shuddup. You're drunk.

FM: *hic!*

Pres: I wanna know if you shee anyone. Does anyone shee anyone? Anyone? Anyone? You there.

GG: Gillian Gilquest, Gilmeecia On the Town. Mr. President, what is the purpose of this press conference?

Pres: Who said you could ask *hic!* ask *hic!* ask *hic!* questions?

GG: You called on me.

Pres: I wanted to know *hic!* if you *hic!* if you *hic!* if you shee anyone. That's what I wanna know. You know? Ned, you know?

FM: What, Lou?

Pres: Shuddup, you're drunk.

FM: *hic!*

GG: I see lots of people, sir.

Pres: You DO? Where?

GG: Right here. All around us.

Pres: Oh. Those?

GG: Yes, sir.

Pres: Those are people?

GG: Of course they are, sir.

Pres: I thought they were ants. From up here you all look like *hic!* like *hic!* you all look like *hic!* ants. Ants, I said.

GG: I heard what you said, sir. You're only ten feet away from me. Why would I look like an ant?

Pres: Well, the six arms and the antennae *hic!*

GG: I don't have six arms and antennae, sir.

Pres: No? Well, I'm shorry to hear that, Gilligan.

GG: It's Gillian, sir.

Pres: Jus' what I shed. Have you been to the doctor?

GG: Because you got my name wrong?

Pres: Because your armsh an' antennae are missing! Aren't you lishening?

PSGM: Perhaps it would be a good idea to get to the point of the press conference, sir.

Pres: Wonnerful idea, Gipsh!

PSGM: It's Gig, sir.

Pres: Jus' what I *hic!* what I *hic!* what *hic!* what I *hic!* I *hic!* oh, shcrew it. I come before you today-- my fellow Gilmeeshiansh. Did I say that?

PSGM: Not yet, sir.

Pres: Yesh, I did. I jus' did. Aren't you lishening, Gingsh?

PSGM: Yes, sir. Why don't you proceed with the announcement, sir?

Pres: Oh, yes. The announshement. The one we're all here to hear. With our ears. Right, Gag? Our ears. He he. Today it givesh me great pleasure to come before you an' say, with my own mouth, the one I'm talking with right now, thish mouth right here on the front of my head that you're watching an' sheeing the words coming out of, that'sh right. Is that right, Glip?

PSGM: Gig, sir. And everyone can see your mouth.

Pres: Yes. Damn right they can! What wash I shaying? Ned!

FM: What, Lou?

Pres: Shuddup, you're drunk.

FM: *hic!*

Pres: Today my gillow Fellmeeshiansh-- my fillow Walmeeshian-- my pillow Filling-- my fallow field of revenue-generating shtrip-mineabilitiy-- my *hic!* what the hell wash I shaying, Gigi?

PSGM: Maybe you were going to make an announcement.

Pres: Oh yes! I was. But now you beat me to it an' everybody already knowsh. You're fired.

PSGM: In that case I'll be going--

Pres: Nooooooo! Don't leave me alone in front of thish pack of rabid wild flesh-craving lunatic reportersh!

PSGM: Then how about we get to the announcement, sir?

Pres: Ohhh, the announshement. Why didn't shomeone *hic!* or shomething? Okay. The announcement. Here it is; the announshement. I'm announshing it... now!

PSGM: So go ahead, sir.

Pres: Don't rush me! I'm doing it.

PSGM: With all due respect sir, I don't hear any announcment--

Pres: Well if you'd shtop your yammering *hic!* your yammering *hic!* innerupting me, maybe you'd hear the words my mouth is shaying, Glint.

PSGM: ...So, go ahead.

Pres: Okay! The announcement. I forgot it. Can you announsh it, Gringo?

PSGM: Gig, sir. My name is Gig. And the announcement, so far as I know, is simply that the Kickfooters are still alive in qualifying group eleven.

Pres: Hah! Take your mathematical elimination and shove it up your *hic!* shove it up your *hic!* up your *hic!* oh, you know where to shove it. So do it! Right now, while I'm watching to make sure you do it right!

PSGM: I think it might be wise to end the press conference right now. No questions, ladies and gentlemen.

Possible Wild Card Entry

Here in the NationStates World, nations rise and nations fall. Since the beginning of the World Cup Qualifiers, no less than 4 nations have fallen. With that fact, should any of those nations finish in the top two of any group, this will open up a wild card entry, for the highest rankes nation that does not make it into the top two. Etria, Freedomnessity, North Russia, and Praetorian Rome have all fallen since the registration for this cup, and Freedomnessity, in group 12, stands a real chance of finishing in the top two, being only 2 points away from second spot. Should they finish in the top two, this will be a much lauded opportunity for any teams that might be unlucky in the qualifiers, like Malundar, Bedistan, or Spaam, who all have a real chance of missing out. With 3 matches to go, time will tell if any team is feeling lucky, punk.


Ahhh damn. Was worth a try :P
I'm just veritably pissed off that the second seed stands a very real chance of missing out for the first time in over 15 years.... damn formula :P

OOC: Also me too, i think the hosts decide on the wild card possibility
IC:

Liverpool England Morning Daily
World Cup Seven Qualifying Update
Audioslavian officials told to investigate 'homosexual' claim, Liverpool England national team within reach of WC7 First Round proper

CCL, Liverpool England---
The national team is now one game away from securing qualification for World Cup Seven. The team, ranked 41st in the Qualifying Round, is currently second in Group Two, one point behind leaders Runaway Moose. Being four points ahead of third-placed Commerce Heights, who have nine points and are the only other team threatening to take second place in the group, the team need to win their next match against Praetorian Rome, who have fallen to extinction, on neutral ground since playing AWAY is not possible. The team is expected to win that match while leaders Runaway Moose take on Commerce Heights. Following the match, should Runaway Moose have won along with the national team, LE would have sixteen points, and Commerce Heights nine, allowing LE to progress through, being seven points in front of Commerce Heights, who would then be unable to catch up with a possible six points to be attained.
Meanwhile, The Liverpool England Government has ordered a full investigation with Audioslavian officials into a claim that “64-66% of people in LE are homosexuals”, although Sports Chief Erfin Caws has said that the claim was, at most, “a pathetic attempt at a bad joke.”
[code:1:ecfe18cc7b]
Group 2 P W D L F A GD Points
Runaway Moose 7 4 2 1 10 4 6 14
Liverpool England 7 4 1 2 18 9 9 13
Commerce Heights 7 2 3 2 11 12 -1 9
Pavesia 7 2 2 3 14 17 -3 8
Praetorian Rome 7 2 1 4 8 12 -4 7
Intergallactic Hell 7 2 1 4 9 16 -7 7[/code:1:ecfe18cc7b]

Metzitzia Defeated Twice

Oglethorpia's team once again faced Metzitzia, this time at home and played spectacularly. Fitzgerald completed his first hat trick with a free kick put in from midfield in the 32nd, a header four minutes later and one last in the 84th after a save by Metzitzia's keeper. Stewart also completed a hat trick of his own with goals in the 20th, 51st and 78th.

Oglethorpia 6
Metzitzia 3
Fitzgerald 32, 36, 84, Stewart 20, 51, 78

Memorandum

From: Magistrate kollontai, investigating matters in relation to the
substitution of substitute leather by substitute subsitute leather,
ie leather.

To: finep, Errinundera's Protector of Legal Affairs

CC: willd, Errinundera's Protector of Civil Choice, Economic
Participation and the Natural Envrionment; filthyl, Errinundera's
Protector of Sport and the Common Wealth; overseasj,
Errinundera's Protector of Foreign Affairs (can't you blokes get
simpler titles?); all Errinundrian media companies.

Subject: Commentary on a certain Quohog news report.


We do things differently. If a corporation wants to buy government
land, they are forced to not only pay full value for the land, but also
give us a share of the profits. While we might not have the
environmental controls of other nations, we do profit from the
exchange much more because we force the companies to pay
what any other individual would pay. The reason for environmental
laws is so that citizens can get their cut of the national resources.


Not only are there no environmental controls in Quohog but, in
addition, those in power get kickbacks.


So, to understand the Errinunderan mind, one must understand
that environmental issues basically mean mass, multi-trillion dollar
theft to them, and they react accordingly.

Correct. The forest and the land belong to the people. Corporate
practice is to take if from them.


The factory union started a nationwide protest against Ploser Ltd.
Products! I mean, we were not even trying to fire the workers, but
they did this anyways!

The Ploser boycott and protest was organised by citizens' groups
headed by failed revolutionary, levlaf, and well-known activist,
swellen. The Textile and Footwear Union had nothing to do with
organising these actions. This is important should Ploser try to take
action against the union.


Part of the reason for the creation of the our Maw-Ploser merger
was that we had the experience, know-how, and techniques to
produce their microfibre on the international level. So they brought
the actual product and the Ploser name, and we brought
everything else.

No merger took place. Maw Ltd contracted to supply Ploser Ltd
with microfibre. The companies were and are at arm's length.


Our factory in Manny Moo was using our method. They were still
producing the microfibre. Actually, the reason for the leather
products was because of an Errinunderan law. After Nestle
Errinundera was driven out of business because of its practices in
third world nations, a law was passed which forced any company
to form a merger with an international corporation, such as Maw
Ltd., to use a list of third-world small business as a third partner in
the deal. There is a lot of red tape, but it basically forces any such
merger to equally profit these poor third world nations through
small and local businesses. So, after we signed on the dotted line,
we received a list of acceptable businesses, and we visited them to
find if any could handle our specifications for producing microfibre
under Maw's new method. Thus, we were given the role of
middle-men. Although we would have preferred to the making of microfibre ourselves, we were bound by Errinunderan law.


I repeat that Maw Ltd and Ploser Ltd did not merge. Their
arrangement was simply a contractual one. The law on acceptable
contractors is only binding on Ploser Ltd, an Errinundrian
company. Of course, Ploser Ltd is required to include such
conditions in any contract they undertake. The Errinundrian
authorities can only apply sanctions against Ploser Ltd. It is up to
Ploser Ltd, in order to avoid sanctions, to police the contract.
Furthermore, Errinundrian regulations only specify that 25% of
imported product must come from approved sources. Maw Ltd was
not a middle-man. Under their contract they could manufacture up
to 75% of the microfibre. We have only their word that they didn't.

Recommendation: This regulation is so open to corruption at
all levels it should be repealed at the earliest opportunity. It is also
contrary to the Errinunderian principle of "aid without reciprocity".


It appears that instead using our machines, they have sold them
on the black market and were making the raw material from animal
skin. Of course, if we were allowed to handle the situation
personally, this never would have happened, but we were not
allowed near these businesses, or allowed to transport the product.
Another aspect of the law supposed to protect these small
businesses from abig, bad international company. A member of the
Errinunderan government was supposed to check up on these
businesses to sure things were running the way they should, but
invidio told me that he had not been allowed to send anyone for
reasons obscure toboth of us.

Errinundera has no authority to interfere with the operations of
foreign businesses in foreign countries, other than the usual
contractual relationships under local contractual law. Errinundera
has no armed forces so is quite incapable of preventing the
inspection of sub-contractors by Maw Ltd. Errinundera does not
inspect the business practices or premises of foreign businesses in
foreign coutries. Mar Baxxy is speaking quite deceptively here.
Maw Ltd was required, under its contract with Ploser Ltd, to supply
microfibre and to have 25% of it sourced from approved third
parties. That these contractual obligations were being met could be
determined within Errinundera by 1) testing the material and 2)
comparing the volume received by Ploser Ltd against the volume
being produced by the the third parties. For Maw Ltd, any failure is
a breach of contract, no more. The issue is more serious for Ploser
Ltd, of course.

Yes, we are now breaking the Errinunderan law...

No. Maw Ltd may be in breach of its contractual obligations but it
has not broken Errinundrian law.


What you must understand is that the civil disobedience occurring
in Errinundera is actually encouraged by the government.

The Errinundrian Constitution gives all citizens protection against
legal sanction in cases where they have caused damage to a profit
making organization. This protection has limitations defined under
the constitution but courts have interpreted the protection very
broadly. Thus there can be no civil disobedience where no laws
have been broken. Further, the government can neither condone
nor condemn such activity. It is a matter for the courts, which have
overturned laws attempting to qualify the protection under the
constitution.


The Errinunderan government keeps control by using occasional
riots and disturbances such as this to beat back any people with
different opinions. For example: Ploser Ltd.'s CEO, ploser, and the
GM, cabanap were some of the leading thinkers of the capitalist
school of thought in Errinundera. They were represented by the
Managing Director of the Errinundrian Chamber of Commerce and
Industry, mememe, and by the Protector of Trade invidious. These
riots allow the government to forcefully suppress these dissidents.


The government may be guilty of inactivity but I have not found any
evidence of civil, political or personal suppression of the people
named. Indeed invidio is an active member of the government.
Errinundera has no police or internal security apparatus so there
can be no political intimidation.


There is ample evidence that sharonb, levlaf, and swellen, the
main forces behind the recent destruction are high members of the
Scandinavian Paradise party, the socialist party, and the green
party respectively. Since those three groups control the
government and most of the news outlets, it is obvious that the
government is simply following the time-honored tradition of tyrants
everywhere by making their voice the ONLY voice.

All three are members of the Socialist Party, which is the smallest
of the three main parties. The other 2 parties named use their
parliamentary majority to marginalize the SP. Part of the political
strategy of the SP is to destabilize the government by creating civil
unrest. The only news outlet owned by the government is the
Errinundrian Broadcasting Commission which is controlled by a
board of trustees operating under a stict charter that is transparent
and independent of government. All other outlets are owned either
privately or by community groups. There are no regulations
governing content. Strict regulations, however, restrict foreign
ownership.


This situation has involved an attack on a company which is now a
part of Maw Ltd., a Quohog company. That means that the 16
factories destroyed were factories under the control of a Quohog
company. This is a serous attack on our interests.

I reiterate, Ploser Ltd entered into a contractual arrangement with
Maw Ltd. No portion of the company was purchased. I can only
surmise that the Quohogs are being mischievous.


Although Queen Lois and Prime Minister and Consort Peter have
not considered war as an option...

Bluster


We will be back tonight with Quohog's response, and with what
this series of events means in terms of Quohog-Errinunderan
relations, already fragile at best.

The misdemeanors of an Errinundrian company or of a Quohog
company should not be of concern to governments that have
adequate regulatory authorities governing their behaviour. I can
only surmise that Quohog government members have a financial
stake in Maw Ltd and are embarrassed by the revelations of
corporate deception. Their financial loss appears to be, at the
worst, minimal.

on the subject of dead nations, i dont think we should allow them to qualify for the world cup proper. For example in the 1992 European Championships, Yugoslavia qualified ahead of Denmark in their group, but due to the conflict in Yugoslavia at the time, they had to pull out. Fifa awarded their qualification place to Denmark. (incedently, Denmark actually went on to win the whole tournament, which still makes me giggle today, especially as they turned Germany over in the final :D)

So yeah, if Lemmy agrees, thats what were gonna do. If a dead nation qualifies in third, then their spot would be taken by the team in fourth, etc.

Metzitzia Defeated Twice
Oglethorpia 6
Giant Zucchini 3
Fitzgerald 32, 36, 84, Stewart 20, 51, 78

:?:

If a dead nation qualifies in third, then their spot would be taken by the team in fourth, etc.

2nd?

Metzitzia Defeated Twice
Oglethorpia 6
Giant Zucchini 3
Fitzgerald 32, 36, 84, Stewart 20, 51, 78

:?:

If a dead nation qualifies in third, then their spot would be taken by the team in fourth, etc.

2nd?

thats what i said. In Audioslavia, 2nd is spelt "third", 3rd is spelt "fourth" and 4th is spelt "jam" It gets quite confusing when your trying to buy pot. From now on i'll use the normal language for these words....

God, we are the only team not to beat Fart Wars in our Group. I feel so ashamed....

Well, that's football, I suppose.

More on our abortive qualifying attempt later...

(Incidentally, I'm not in favour of giving more weight to seedings in the World Cup. They seem to do a good enough job anyway. And one of the most enjoyable things about football is it's unpredictability. You never know when a team pulls off a spectacular feat of "giant-killing". Most recent example: Scotlend managing to hold Germany to a draw. Which was exceptional, especially looking at the crappiness of Scotland at the moment. If you definitely know who's going to win, where's the fun of it?)

All resident Outcasts were glued to their TV screens (not literally) at 6.00pm this morning just to have conformation that Dark Outcasts were infact leading their group and all set to qualify. All though the team's unbeaten run was ended with a 2-2 draw with Aquilla no one is disappoint, prehaps with the exception of the bookies. The team are now able to lose all of the forthcoming games withouit fear of not qualifying. Go team!

The coach has been pleased with the Outcasts performance but hopes that they haven't tried too hard because they have many harder matches to come. The manager has denied the quote that "Its been terrible I've lost too much money because I bet against the team qualifying." However this quote did come from a lunatic so proably isn't true.

OCC: yay go us!

matchday 8 results posted :)

Headline of the Daily Belmore
WINNNNNNNNNER, HA HA WEEGIES. 3-1

OOC: Post removed by SN38 due to inaccuracy

Headline of the Daily Belmore
WINNNNNNNNNER, HA HA WEEGIES. 3-1

Yeah, because you're real burly defeating a small nation that's never entered a World Cup before :roll:

Errinundera avenged their earlier defeat at the hands of DePaul:

Errinundera 5 DePaul 0 at the Mount Ellery Cavern
Goals: antarcticad 3 (69, 81, 90), nyleptha (51), sorais (53)
Best: antarcticad, regnanse, snapier

[code:1:b9c4adb5f6]
Group 5 P W D L F A GD PTS
Europa Brittania 8 7 0 1 17 2 +15 21
Errinundera 8 5 1 2 14 5 +9 16
LordSquall 8 4 2 2 17 14 +3 14
DePaul 8 3 1 4 15 20 -5 10
Kaze Progressa 8 1 1 6 10 21 -11 4
Sliponia 8 1 1 6 8 19 -11 4
[/code:1:b9c4adb5f6]

Last 2 matches:
Kaze Progressa v Errinundera
Errinundera v Sliponia

Europa Brittania will qualify
Errinundera most likely to also qualify
LordSquall can qualify
DePaul has a very slim chance of qualifying
Kaze Progressa and Sliponia will probably dispute last place

Full newspaper report of the opening ceremony and inaugural match at the Mt Ellery Cavern will be posted tomorrow night Oz time, ie late morning GMT.

NEWSFLASH:

Giant Zucchini continues on its run to World Cup qualification with a 2-0 win over Terranos. Oog marked his return strongly, securing another clean sheet as well as his own fare share of remarkable saves. So did Urk. After scoring a blistering goal in the 13th minute, he secured the win with a sweeping curler in the 58th minute. Head Coach Mr Hurr, "I feel we played well today, although this is not our full potential. This is the time to up the tempo and go for the gold."

Vital Away Win Gifts Brittania Three Points


The Brittanian national team returned to their WC7 Training camp this morning after a difficult 2-0 Away win against Sliponia, keeping Brittania top of Group Five with 21 points, and suffering only one defeat against second place Errinundera.

Goals from Andrew Zurich after only four minutes, and Noel Huntly scoring his first International goal ten minutes from time after replacing Danny McHilton, who failed a late fitness test completed the win.

Jarvis Smith confirmed he is pleased with the result, and that he couldn't have asked for a better standing in Group 5.

Brittania lining up 4-4-2-


Reeves
Jones O'Hanrahan Cannon Stacey

Strazt Junnon Huntly Simmons

Zurich Winter.

Subsitutions-

Urqhart for Stazt 67.

Lionel on for Zurich 80

Commerce Heights Eliminated from World Cup Contention
RUNAWAY MOOSE (1/2/100 NME) - After a dissapointing 4-1 loss to #18 Runaway Moose (5-2-1), along with Liverpool England's (5-1-2) uneventful 2-0 win over Praetorian Rome (2-1-5), the Bulldogs (2-3-3) were eliminated from World Cup contention. The last two matches at home against Liverpool England and Intergallactic Hell (2-1-5) should give the Bulldogs a chance to prove themselves worthy of a top 100 ranking in World Cup 8.
[code:1:442fdc2ffd]Group 2 P W D L F A GD Points
Runaway Moose 8 5 2 1 14 5 9 17
Liverpool England 8 5 1 2 20 9 11 16
Pavesia 8 3 2 3 17 17 0 11
Commerce Heights 8 2 3 3 12 16 -4 9
Praetorian Rome 8 2 1 5 8 14 -6 7
Intergallactic Hell 8 2 1 5 9 19 -10 7[/code:1:442fdc2ffd]
Bulldogs Schedule – WC7 Qualifiers:
Day 1: vs Pavesia – L 3-4
Day 2: at Intergallactic Hell – T 0-0
Day 3: vs Runaway Moose – W 1-0
Day 4: at Pavesia – T 3-3
Day 5: at Liverpool England – T 2-2
Day 6: vs Praetorian Rome – L 0-3
Day 7: at Praetorian Rome – W 2-0
Day 8: at Runaway Moose – L 1-4
Day 9: vs Liverpool England –
Day 10: vs Intergallactic Hell –

Outcasts thrash Snails

Today Bulloniens national soccer team, the Snails, lost 5-0 against the Dark Outcasts. Coach Gregor was unavailible for a comment, but the secretary for the board of the team hinted that a new coach would be considered for the next tournament.

Website and table updated but I still need someone to fix up the news, *coughTnUIcough*. Or if Tanah Burung or Ariddia would like to do it, then you can put your hand up.

:!: http://nswcc.tripod.com/wc7archive/wc7qtable.html :!:
:!: http://nswcc.tripod.com/results.html :!:

Two Games To Go

With just two games to go, lets see who's in, out, and is biting their nails :D

Group 1:
Ariddia is in, and first. Second can be filled by any of 4 teams, but should either be Rhaken Kull or Bedistan. My money's on Bedistan.

Group 2:
Group Of Death. Basically, you do NOT want to be here. Only 3 teams can possibly go through, and they should be Runaway Moose and Liverpool England, and likely in that order too.

Group 3:
Ravenspire and Tanah Burung are in. As for order, its anyone's guess, though my money's on Ravenspire.

Group 4:
Dark Outcasts and One Red Dot are in, and should be that order as well.

Group 5:
Europa Britannia is in, and should finish first. Second can technically be filled by any of 3 teams, though only Errinundera and LordSquall are realistic, and Errinundera is likely.

Group 6:
Halfassedstates can mathematically not make it, but the chances of that are as likely as Australia winning the World Cup :P Akbarland should finish second, with Melita and Gaulos possible but unlikely.

Group 7:
Kingsford are in and first. Any of 4 teams can finish second, though realistically, its between Busby, Gnoocopolep, and Davidus Voldemort. My money is on Busby, but for Davidus to go through would be incredible.

Group 8:
Lunatic Goofballs are in, and should finish first. Pure Evil should finish second, though Demonic Beings and The Lowland Clans are possible.

Group 9:
See Group 3, but replace Ravenspire and Tanah Burung with Oglethorpia and Giant Zucchini.

Group 10:
Quohog are in, and the chances of them not finishing first are the same as Australia winning the World Cup :P The Belmore Family should finish second, but everyone would love to see Dyelli Beybi get through, even though it is unlikely.

Group 11:
Snub Nose 38 and Nonexistentcitygrad are in, with Snub Nose 38 most likely first.

Group 12:
Squornshelous are in and first. Malundar should finish second, though Freedomnessity and West Ariddia are mathematically possible.

Group 13:
Dennisov are in and first. Second could be Spaam, Jacktazea, or Christofi. If Spaam beat Jacktazea though, Spaam are almost definitely through. If Spaam draw Jacktazea, then Spaam are only likely through. If Spaam lose to Jactazea, then Spaam will need a miracle to get through, and Jacktazea will probably finish second.

Group 14:
Svecia are in and first. Second could be Haraki, Eisen Engel, or South Euroland, with my money on Haraki.

Group 15:
Total n Utter Jackass are in and first. Oddslavo should be second, though Timway is mathematically possible.


My Picks:
1: Ariddia, Bedistan
2: Runaway Moose, Liverpool England
3: Ravenspire, Tanah Burung
4: Dark Outcasts, One Red Dot
5: Europa Britannia, Errinunderra
6: Halfassedstates, Akbarland
7: Kingsford, Busby, (Davidus Voldemort)
8: Lunatic Goofballs, Pure Evil
9: Oglethorpia, Giant Zucchini
10: Quohog, The Belmore Family, (Dyelli Beybi)
11: Snub Nose 38, Nonexistentcitygrad
12: Squornshelous, Malundar
13: Dennisov, Spaam
14: Svecia, Haraki
15: Total n Utter Jackass, Oddslavo

ORD Joins DO in WC Qualification

The streets of ORD and the ORD Sports Fraternity were in high spirits as on Day 8 of WC7, the team defeated sudden contender Pablicosta by a 3-2 win which almost ended up as a draw till the very last few minutes. It was H. RADFORD who had saved the day at the 85th minute after both DURSELY and STONE had scored a goal each at the 23rd and 52nd minute. The Pablicostan team who was at home ground were getting serious after DURSLEY’s deft approach at the goal, giving the Pablicosta team a goal at the 39th minute and 63rd minute.

Assistant Coach David Joel says that it was nail biting from the start till the end as Pablicosta kept on surging forward and not miss a beat. It was a close shave that Harry finally shot that goal of salvation.

Let’s have a look at the Group 4 Qualifying Table.
[code:1:5ae8fa07f3]
Group 4 P W D L F A GD T
15 Dark Outcasts 8 7 1 0 21 4 17 22
21 One Red Dot 8 6 0 2 21 7 14 18
51 Aquilla 8 3 2 3 15 17 -2 11
Grand master Mark 8 3 1 4 12 20 -8 10
Bullonien 8 2 0 6 6 16 -10 6
Pablicosta 8 0 2 6 10 21 -11 2
[/code:1:5ae8fa07f3]

With ORD’s sixth win, the team sends the nation to second place at 18 points, leaving the bottom 6 with a 7-point difference from Aquilla. Aquilla’s lost against Grand master mark had cost them a chance at the World Cup. At this point, it is not possible for any of the bottom 6 to reach qualification, leaving 15th-seed Dark Outcast and 21st-seed One Red Dot to continue. Even with two more wins, 17 points still does not earn Aquilla second place. Although it is confirmed who is continuing, the last two days still have to be played to sort out the final rankings against the other 14 groups in the Qualifiers.

DO will be playing Grand master Mark and Pablicosta on the remaining 2 days. Head Adviser Christopher Yorkshin says that DO and ORD will win the remainder of their matches and DO will be first and ORD second.

On Day 9, ORD will be playing guest to host Bullonien. ORD had defeated Bullonien on Day 5 with an overwhelming 4-0 win at home ground.

OOC: Just specify the exciting games here, and the odds :)

Betting Pool

Jacktazea vs Spaam

Jacktazea: 15-1
Draw: 20-1
Spaam: 3-2

Spaam vs Ribenia

Spaam: 5-4
Draw: 50-1
Ribenia: 100-1

SPAAM - The results for Group 11 are incorrect. The Match Day 6 results are a duplication of the Match Day 5 results. The correct cumulative results/standing for Group 11 is:

[code:1:5937e7c7e6]
Group 11 P W D L F A GD PTS
Snub Nose 38 8 7 1 0 25 1 +24 22
Nonexistentcitygrad 8 5 0 3 17 13 +4 15
Gesamtkuntswerk 8 4 1 3 17 12 +5 13
Gilmeecia 8 3 1 4 10 19 -9 10
Antaeus Rising 8 2 2 4 8 12 -4 8
Yatsumica 8 0 1 7 2 21 -19 1
[/code:1:5937e7c7e6]
Snub Nose 38 - Qualified
Nonexistentcitygrad - best chance at 2nd spot
Gesamtkunstwerk - good chance at 2nd spot
Gilmeecia - a slim chance at 2nd spot
Antaeus Rising - eliminated
Yatsumica - eliminated

Thank you thank you to Spaam for doing the table. Okay, now that I've got some data to work with, without having to spend 6 hours tabulating it all myself, here is a report on how the "new formula" is performing.

Through 360 matches, teams are averaging 1.713 goals per game. Does anyone remember what it was in WC6? Around there, I think.

Overall, ranked teams are doing quite well. It looks as if only one or two (if any) unranked teams will qualify this time. In fact, ranked teams are doing so well that I'm inclined to think that the formula needs to be tweaked to reduce their advantage.

If anyone has time on their hands, it would be very interesting to see a tabulation of how home v away teams have been performing.

Here is a table showing performance through 8 matches (http://homepages.nyu.edu/~pcj1/WC7_perf.xls). Included is how each team is performing offensively and defensively compared to average (1000) and compared to their own historical performance (which would also be 1000). Not surprisingly, highly ranked teams are generally performing better than their historical performances, and poorly-ranked and unranked teams are performing below their historical levels (since ranking modifies offensive and defensive ratings in the formula). However, while we would expect to see some advantage/disadvantage based on rating, I think (to state it again) that we're seeing too much bias here.

SPAAM - The results for Group 11 are incorrect. The Match Day 6 results are a duplication of the Match Day 5 results. The correct cumulative results/standing for Group 11 is:

[code:1:ee916351cd]
Group 11 P W D L F A GD PTS
Snub Nose 38 8 7 1 0 25 1 +24 22
Nonexistentcitygrad 8 5 0 3 17 13 +4 15
Gesamtkuntswerk 8 4 1 3 17 12 +5 13
Gilmeecia 8 3 1 4 10 19 -9 10
Antaeus Rising 8 2 2 4 8 12 -4 8
Yatsumica 8 0 1 7 2 21 -19 1
[/code:1:ee916351cd]
Snub Nose 38 - Qualified
Nonexistentcitygrad - best chance at 2nd spot
Gesamtkunstwerk - good chance at 2nd spot
Gilmeecia - a slim chance at 2nd spot
Antaeus Rising - eliminated
Yatsumica - eliminated

Well, then the table I just put up has incorrect data. Maybe i'll correct it later if I have a chance.

SPAAM - The results for Group 11 are incorrect. The Match Day 6 results are a duplication of the Match Day 5 results. The correct cumulative results/standing for Group 11 is:

[code:1:648b13b692]
Group 11 P W D L F A GD PTS
Snub Nose 38 8 7 1 0 25 1 +24 22
Nonexistentcitygrad 8 5 0 3 17 13 +4 15
Gesamtkuntswerk 8 4 1 3 17 12 +5 13
Gilmeecia 8 3 1 4 10 19 -9 10
Antaeus Rising 8 2 2 4 8 12 -4 8
Yatsumica 8 0 1 7 2 21 -19 1
[/code:1:648b13b692]
Snub Nose 38 - Qualified
Nonexistentcitygrad - best chance at 2nd spot
Gesamtkunstwerk - good chance at 2nd spot
Gilmeecia - a slim chance at 2nd spot
Antaeus Rising - eliminated
Yatsumica - eliminated

Are you sure the table is wrong?

And its just the links, I'll fix them up.

That table does look wrong. Let me just recheck Nonexistentcitygrad results.

[code:1:70f38d980b]
Name P W D L F A GD Pts
Snub Nose 38 8 7 1 0 25 1 +24 22
Nonexistentcitygrad 8 5 0 3 17 14 +3 15
Gesamtkuntswerk 8 4 1 3 17 12 +5 13
Gilmeecia 8 3 1 4 10 19 -9 10
Antaeus Rising 8 2 2 4 8 12 -4 8
Yatsumica 8 0 1 7 2 21 -19 1
[/code:1:70f38d980b]

SPAAM - The results for Group 11 are incorrect. The Match Day 6 results are a duplication of the Match Day 5 results. The correct cumulative results/standing for Group 11 is:

[code:1:754a467b66]
Group 11 P W D L F A GD PTS
Snub Nose 38 8 7 1 0 25 1 +24 22
Nonexistentcitygrad 8 5 0 3 17 14 +3 15
Gesamtkuntswerk 8 4 1 3 17 12 +5 13
Gilmeecia 8 3 1 4 10 19 -9 10
Antaeus Rising 8 2 2 4 8 12 -4 8
Yatsumica 8 0 1 7 2 21 -19 1
[/code:1:754a467b66]
Snub Nose 38 - Qualified
Nonexistentcitygrad - best chance at 2nd spot
Gesamtkunstwerk - good chance at 2nd spot
Gilmeecia - a slim chance at 2nd spot
Antaeus Rising - eliminated
Yatsumica - eliminated
I THINK this table is right. And, I think the reason is because on the website the matchday 6 results are the same as the matchday 5 results. So, the website is counting matchday 5 twice, and not counting the actual results from matchday 6 at all.
:?:
(note: Antaeus Rising has 14 goals against Nonexistentcitygrad, I had 13 - and Antaeus Rising is correct.)

Website and table updated but I still need someone to fix up the news, *coughTnUIcough*

I told you I'm not doing the news. :P I did the rankings and also updated the best and worse teams a while ago.

Hmmmm, ok, I'll fix it up.... soon,.... ish....

I've been comparing the results for these qualifiers, and for those of the European Championships. The average number of goals is still a bit out, being about 1.71 instead of about 1.35, though the standard deviation is still right. Also, the teams at the higher end are doing too well.... Only one team has an average of over 3 goals (France), whereas, there are 7 here, at least 5 too many. Likewise, for over 2.5: 4 to 19, which is at least 10 too many. So yeah. If you look at the graph of For vs Against, for both qualifiers, you can see the difference:

http://nswcc.tripod.com/admin/untitled.jpg

The sheet I used is here: http://nswcc.tripod.com/admin/stats.xls

Actually you can't see either :lol:

fixed :P

You sure? It isn't loading.

Just re-checked the Group 11 results. Using the 8 matchday results, as posted in the NS thread, built a spreadsheet. It results as follows, which are the results (as corrected by Antaeus Rising) I posted above.

[code:1:37603b65ac]
Group 11 P W D L F A GD PTS
Snub Nose 38 8 7 1 0 25 1 +24 22
Nonexistentcitygrad 8 5 0 3 17 14 +3 15
Gesamtkuntswerk 8 4 1 3 17 12 +5 13
Gilmeecia 8 3 1 4 10 19 -9 10
Antaeus Rising 8 2 2 4 8 12 -4 8
Yatsumica 8 0 1 7 2 21 -19 1
[/code:1:37603b65ac]

Do you want me to sort it out?

MOVED

Shocking Loss Puts Team on Edge Again

THE REPUBLIC OF CANADA -- Avid Bedistani football fans were shocked as they saw their beloved Lions fall to the inexperienced team from the Republic of Canada today.

As with most Bedistani games, it was a low-scoring affair. Not one ball made it into the Canadian net, but Bedistani goalkeeper Olivia Bream did allow one very late in the game. "It was heartbreaking," she commented afterward.

Final score:
The Republic of Canada 1
Bedistan 0

Luckily, Rhaken Kull also lost their eighth-round match against Middleton. This does, however, put our team in a rather uncomfortable position:

1. [8] Ariddia [22 points]
2. [94] Rhaken Kull [13 points]
3. [24] Bedistan [12 points]
4. The Republic of Canada [11 points]
5. Middleton [9 points]
6. Etria [2 points]

Four teams are technically competing for the coveted second position in the group. Middleton has an outside chance, but it is basically a free-for-all among the remaining three teams.

Games to watch:

Matchday 9: Rhaken Kull vs. The Republic of Canada
Matchday 9: Etria vs. Bedistan
If Rhaken Kull wins and Bedistan loses, Rhaken Kull is in.
If both Rhaken Kull and Bedistan win, their final head-to-head match decides who qualifies. Bedistan winning that match would put them in, while a draw or Rhaken Kull victory would put RK in.
If Bedistan wins and Rhaken Kull loses, it's still anyone's contest [Bedistan 15, Canada 14, RK 13].
If both Bedistan and Rhaken Kull lose, it's still anyone's contest [Canada 14, RK 13, Bedistan 12].

Approximate odds for each match:

Etria vs. Bedistan (matchday 9):
Bedistan: 4-3
Draw: 12-1
Etria: 40-1

Rhaken Kull vs. The Republic of Canada (matchday 9):
Rhaken Kull: 4-1
Draw: 2-1
The Republic of Canada: 5-1

Bedistan vs. Rhaken Kull (matchday 10):
Bedistan: 5-2
Draw: 3-1
Rhaken Kull: 4-1

Shocking Loss Puts Team on Edge Again

THE REPUBLIC OF CANADA -- Avid Bedistani football fans were shocked as they saw their beloved Lions fall to the inexperienced team from the Republic of Canada today.

As with most Bedistani games, it was a low-scoring affair. Not one ball made it into the Canadian net, but Bedistani goalkeeper Olivia Bream did allow one very late in the game. "It was heartbreaking," she commented afterward.

Final score:
The Republic of Canada 1
Bedistan 0

Luckily, Rhaken Kull also lost their eighth-round match against Middleton. This does, however, put our team in a rather uncomfortable position:

1. [8] Ariddia [22 points]
2. [94] Rhaken Kull [13 points]
3. [24] Bedistan [12 points]
4. The Republic of Canada [11 points]
5. Middleton [9 points]
6. Etria [2 points]

Four teams are technically competing for the coveted second position in the group. Middleton has an outside chance, but it is basically a free-for-all among the remaining three teams.

Games to watch:

Matchday 9: Rhaken Kull vs. The Republic of Canada
Matchday 9: Etria vs. Bedistan
If Rhaken Kull wins and Bedistan loses, Rhaken Kull is in.
If both Rhaken Kull and Bedistan win, their final head-to-head match decides who qualifies. Bedistan winning that match would put them in, while a draw or Rhaken Kull victory would put RK in.
If Bedistan wins and Rhaken Kull loses, it's still anyone's contest [Bedistan 15, Canada 14, RK 13].
If both Bedistan and Rhaken Kull lose, it's still anyone's contest [Canada 14, RK 13, Bedistan 12].

Approximate odds for each match:

Etria vs. Bedistan (matchday 9):
Bedistan: 4-3
Draw: 12-1
Etria: 40-1

Rhaken Kull vs. The Republic of Canada (matchday 9):
Rhaken Kull: 4-1
Draw: 2-1
The Republic of Canada: 5-1

Bedistan vs. Rhaken Kull (matchday 10):
Bedistan: 5-2
Draw: 3-1
Rhaken Kull: 4-1

Double post...

Triple post...

Quadruple post...

Quintuple post...

Sextuple post... :shock:

You mean this one that Spaam and Bedistan have wrecked?

You mean this one that Spaam and Bedistan have wrecked?
Yup. This one.

Blah. Sue me. See what happens when *you* try to post at 9pm GMT. :?

Blah. Sue me. See what happens when *you* try to post at 9pm GMT. :?

Beddy holds the record for repeat posts: a sextuple, surpassing my own quadruple.

Hmmmm, ok, I'll fix it up.... soon,.... ish....

I've been comparing the results for these qualifiers, and for those of the European Championships. The average number of goals is still a bit out, being about 1.71 instead of about 1.35, though the standard deviation is still right. Also, the teams at the higher end are doing too well.... Only one team has an average of over 3 goals (France), whereas, there are 7 here, at least 5 too many. Likewise, for over 2.5: 4 to 19, which is at least 10 too many. So yeah. If you look at the graph of For vs Against, for both qualifiers, you can see the difference:

http://nswcc.tripod.com/untitled.jpg

The sheet I used is here: http://nswcc.tripod.com/stats.xls

Tripod's not letting us see the picture there...

Also, I keep getting this dialog box popping up asking for a username and password while viewing this thread... :?

Tripod's not letting us see the picture there...

Also, I keep getting this dialog box popping up asking for a username and password while viewing this thread... :?

Good, it's not just me then.

*****ASPN WORLD CUP 7 SPECIAL REPORT*****

*the familiar strains of the aspn sports theme, both too loud and ill suited to sports, are playing as we fade up from black to the aspn logo and the wc7 logo. the logos join together and go translucent, and through them we see four beautiful goals in quick succession, followed by three magnificent saves, a shot of the hooligan cheerleaders being arrested, two nice tackles, and a corner kick that results in a header just missing goal. segue to the aspn sports desk, behind which on the wall is a snub nose 38 hooligan jersey and a gilmeecian kickfooter jersey. the kickfooter jersey seems to have one arm longer than the other. our aspn announcer is sitting behind the desk biting his nails. he freezes as he realizes he's on the air, and yanks his hand away from his mouth*

Todays World Coup 7 qualifier between The Snub Nose 38 Hooligans and the Gilmeecian Kickfooters took place in Snub Nose 38's national stadium, "38 Special". Today's match brought us a new, and unique, look for the Hooligans.

*scene of the hooligans warming up on the pitch before the match. they are wearing the red shorts and navy blue jersey (with the little gold crown embossed on the left breast) of their usual home kit - but something's different. after a moment we realize it is the fact that the sun is reflecting off their heads. the hooligans are wearing aluminum foil caps. the camera angle shifts a little, so that without loosing the team manager ben dover comes into view, with a microphone held to his face.*

- We had a bit of a time down in Gilmeecia, with the possibility of "Gilmeecian Jeebies" not yet fully ruled out. The boys complained to Justin Case, our new offensive coach, that they'd been chased by big dire-FIFA spiders through that match. We consulted with the medicos over at Saint Swithens, and they tell me these caps will protect the boys from any chance of "Gilmeecian Jeebies" this time out.

*cut to the studio shot*

The Medical Staff at Saint Swithens was not available for comment. The match began a few minutes late, as a couple of tailors and a seamstress had to be located to shorten the left sleeves of the Gilmeecian jerseys.

*we see the kickfooters lined up, taking turns having their left sleeve shortened.*

No sooner had the match begun, then controversy struck. Kickfooter Manager Bi Kicker was furious about the first goal scored by the Hooligans.

*we see several kickfooters attempting to defend their goal, squinting and turning their heads away. the hooligan midfielders and strikers, with the ball, are rapidly closing on the goal, heads tipped forward, the glare from the sun shining directly at the kickfooter defenders.*

The match was halted, while the use of the aluminum foil hats was discussed between the officials and the managers of both sides. The Hooligans were denied permission to wear the caps, defined by the officials as prohibited "unorthodox equipment". After agreement by both sides, the clock was set back to 0:00, and the match given a fresh start.

*we see ben dover screaming at one official, while justin case holds him back. meanwhile, bi kicker is screaming at another official, and being held back as well. eileen dover is screaming at bi kicker, and is also being held back. we think eileen is screaming something about evisceration.*

The match was finally offically underway full 25 minutes after the scheduled start. The Hooligans played without their caps, and apparently without any ill effects from "Gilmeecian Jeebies" as well. In the 14th minute Hooligan forward Malicious, starting in place of Frisky, got his first international goal and gave the Hooligans a 1 to 0 lead.

*malicious leaps over kickfooter defender gilligan lilbuddy, who is slipping as he tries to change direction, to head the ball just before gilgabody gilmooster, kickfooter keeper, reaches it. gilgabody's hands come together in the empty space where the ball used to be, and the ball comes together with the netting in the back of the goal.*

The Hooligans scored again in the 44th minute on a penalty kick given for a professional foul. Rose Krantzengil was the only kickfooter defender Hooligan striker Paddy had to get past, and as Paddy slipped the ball to Rose' left, and went around to Rose's right, Rose used that right to pull Paddy down to the ground.

*paddy is lined up behind the ball, which is resting on the penaly spot. gilgabody gilmooster is shifting back and forth on his line. as paddy strikes the ball, gilgabody's body goes left. the ball goes right - into the net.*

And that's were the score stood at the half.

*the stadium. the sides are funneling into the locker rooms for halftime. the crowd is silent, and looking about, somewhat confused as to what to do next. we're in snub nose 38, at an international football match, and it's halftime. something's missing. suddenly, from various places in the crowd, people begin to shout, and point up. we look up, and see...the hooligan cheerleaders, skydiving into the stadium*

"Snub Nose 38, Hip Hurrah!!
What'd they used to say - Sis, Boom, Bah?
Hooligans, Hooligans, Hip Horray!!
It's Gilmeecian Kickfooters evisceration day!!"

*bi kicker is among the first of many to begin pelting the hooligan cheerleaders with rotting vegetables as soon as they hit the ground. there is quite a bit of confusion, as the cheerleaders parachutes collapse on everyone as they come down. cheerleaders, kickfooter fans, hooligan fans, a small goat, and what appears to be a clown act, crawl out from under the parachutes. the fans continue pelting the cheerleaders as the cheerleaders, as is the custom, are arrested. the goat begins to eat the parachutes. the clown act looks a bit dazed. we find out later they were in the same plane as the cheerleaders, but were supposed to jump at a different location.*

The second half, which began after the Hooligan Cheerleaders had all been rounded up, the parachutes cleared from the field, and the goat auctioned off, was very good football, although fairly uneventful. The Kickfooters had a few good chances early on, and several towards the end, but were never able to finish. The Hooligans got a lucky goal in the 85th minute.

*hooligan midfielder mack passes the ball from the left side, about mid field, to the right. there it is one-touched by neanderthal towards goal. striker frisky fires a shot, which rebounds off the left upright, hits kickfooter defender moe guildenstern in the back of the head, flies off to the left, where it hits hooligan midfielder cromagnon in the back, and is deflected into the goal*

At the end of the match, the score stood GILMEECIAN KICKFOOTERS 0 - SNUB NOSE 38 HOOLIGANS 3

*****THIS HAS BEEN AN ASPN WORLD CUP 7 SPECIAL REPORT*****
[code:1:af16e5c381]
Group 11 P W D L F A GD PTS
Snub Nose 38 10 9 1 0 35 3 +32 28
Nonexistentcitygrad 10 5 1 4 20 17 +3 16
Gesamtkuntswerk 10 4 2 4 21 17 +4 14
Gilmeecia 10 4 2 4 14 22 -8 14
Antaeus Rising 10 3 3 4 14 16 -2 12
Yatsumica 10 0 1 9 4 32 -28 1
[/code:1:af16e5c381]
Snub Nose 38 - Qualified
Nonexistentcitygrad - Qualified
----------------------------
OOC: also getting the userid/password box. appears to be related to the website somehow.

deleted dup post

It's all Spaams fault, he should delete the link that doesn't even work. :P

OOC: AT LEAST IT's not only me.... good to see TnUI has figured something non-football related out by himself...

IC:


CURRENT TABLE AFTER 8 MATCHES:

[code:1:a5a82ad0f7]
Group 2 P W D L F A GD Points
Runaway Moose 8 5 2 1 14 5 +9 17 #
Liverpool England 8 5 1 2 20 9 11 16 #
Pavesia 8 3 2 3 17 17 0 11 #
Commerce Heights 8 2 3 3 12 16 -4 9 +
Praetorian Rome 8 2 1 5 8 14 -6 07 +
Intergallactic Hell 8 2 1 5 9 19 -10 07 +
+eliminated
#have chance of qualifying
[/code:1:a5a82ad0f7]
TO QUALIFY:
Runaway Moose: Win another match, regardless of Pavesia's match as they would be in first or second.
Liverpool England: Beat Commerce Heights, regardless of Pavesia's or Runaway Moose's matches as they would be in first or second
Pavesia: Win both matches and hope Liverpool England lose both to take second place, or win both matches and hope Runaway Moose lose both to take second place if LE win both their games. The latter suggestion regarding Runaway Moose is now impossible.

LE's remaining games:
Match 9: Commerce Heights vs. Liverpool England (AWAY)
Match 10: Liverpool England vs. Pavesia (HOME)

Blah. Sue me. See what happens when *you* try to post at 9pm GMT. :?

Beddy holds the record for repeat posts: a sextuple, surpassing my own quadruple.

ahem! WC6, i had a sexy sextuple :p (or was it wc5? meh)

Group 9:
See Group 3, but replace Ravenspire and Tanah Burung with Oglethorpia and Giant Zucchini.


Nah, we're both irreplaceable :wink:

Spaam, would do news, but no idea how to use html or anything like that. I can barely understand how to work these forums!

Commentary on Radio Tanah Burung Dunia, English-language service:

A sunny day. A beautiful day for a spot of football, watching the Crocodiles vanquish another hapless foe. Today's visitor: Freedom Country. Sounds like a nice place. Fans pack the Tiga Burung stadium, many of them slightly tipsy, to watch the latest qualifier for the World Beer Stein. Cup, rather.

Thunk (no, not a player for Giant Zucchini, it's a sound effect). A collective gasp from the crowd at the ten-minute mark. In a rare occurrence, the other team has scored the first goal. 1-0, Freedom Country. The former group leader is bouncing back from its collapse at the hands of basement-dwellers Trafari.

25 minute mark: Bibere to Manupati, back to Bibere, to Santos, to Syahrir, back to da Cruz, the pass to Cavaco. He shoots, he scores!

48 minutes: Surely, enough injury time? The referee is looking at his watch... he's dropped his watch... Bibere puts the ball between his legs as he fumbles for his watch... she passes to Cavaco... and it's in! 2-1 Tanah Burung! And the ref has found his watch, and blows the whistle to end the half.

53 minutes: A chance for Freedom Country. The striker starts to take the kick... a vicious tackle by Alex Manupatti! Red card, the first to Tanah Burung in several years. Manupatti is off for the match, and being roundly booed. Bad day for this boy, playing his first international match in his home town. A free kick to Freedom Country, it's good! And that leaves the score at 2 each. Could the Crocs be facing their first defeat?

79 minutes: It's been a desperate defending effort by the Crocodiles, a man down against a strong opponent. But Cassie da Cruz strips the ball away from a Freedomite attacker, and starts a run down the pitch. A beautiful save, but the keeper can't hold on to it. Syahrir has it alone in front of an open net, an easy opporunity -- but she passes it across to Cavaco, who tips it in. A very generous and risky move by this young lady, to give David Cavaco the hat trick. And that's how it ended: Tanah Burung 3, Freedom Country 2. Qualification is locked away now, but the Crocs will have to raise their play a notch once they get to Audioslavia.

Group 9:
See Group 3, but replace Ravenspire and Tanah Burung with Oglethorpia and Giant Zucchini.


Nah, we're both irreplaceable :wink:

Spaam, would do news, but no idea how to use html or anything like that. I can barely understand how to work these forums!

You don't need to know html. Just put it in. And make sure you upload the right picture. And put each paragraph between <p> and </p> tags. Thats all.

Ravens Qualify for Cup

Sargard, Ravenspire (AP) -- Ravenspire's national football team handily defeated visiting Trafari, fresh from its fluke victory against Freedom Country. Meanwhile, Tanah Burung's Crocodiles defeated Freedom Country itself, locking both Ravenspire and Tanah Burung into qualifying slots for the Cup proper.

"It's good to be on top again, after our failure to qualify last year," said Zhen Sui-Ling. "This may be our best year yet." Sui-Ling is in a better position than most to judge, having played for the team since its debut in World Cup 3. "We owe a lot of our scoring to Kaede [Kitsuki], but I think the main factor is, the whole team has gelled. The defense and teamwork has been incredible, and I'm honored I got to play with this team."

Kitsuki, the popular foxgirl striker, is responsible for nearly half of the team's goals, having scored in every game save the 0-0 draw against Tanah Burung. Today's match was no exception, as she scored early in the second half, to a chorus of cheers. The other goal was scored by Amara Akizuki on a penalty kick late in the game.

Goals: Kaede Kitsuki (53), Amara Akizuki (81)

Two Games To Go


Group 10:
...The Belmore Family should finish second, but everyone would love to see Dyelli Beybi get through, even though it is unlikely.

Well not everyone

NEWSFLASH:

Giant Zucchini has qualified for the World Cup, separated from Oglethorpia only on goal difference. Head Coach Mr Hurr, "I am of course glad that we have confirmed our place in the World Cup, but we still have Oglethorpia to worry about. They are ahead of us in terms of goal difference, so we cannot falter, and silently hope that they do. Of course, we also feel that they deserve to be where they are now."

News items from the Mount Ellery Evening Gazette:

http://adsys.newsquest.co.uk/images/pubs/masthead/29_7089502.jpg

CAVERN GREETS THE WORLD

NOOK & CRANNIES SHOW THE WAY

Mount Ellery's new football and entertainment stadium was opened yesterday amid much celebration and splendour. After years of speculation, planning, mining, building and outfitting The Cavern is finally a reality. A magical opening ceremony was followed the next day by the ground's inaugural football match when the visiting DePaul national side took on the Longfoots in a World Cup 7 qualifying match.

Three years ago the city council decided to award the planning of the opening ceremony to one of the city's secondary schools. The local education authority agreed to include it as part of the students' years 11 and 12 assessment. All schools were included in a lottery in which the winner's name, Nook and Cranny College in the Very Far Down sector, was drawn from a hat. Mayor, bollb, said that some people were apprehensive about the outcome. "Tonight just shows that the nervous nellies had misplaced concerns. The ceremony was magnificent and a credit to the students. Given a specified budget, they came up with all the ideas. Of course, some of things they would have liked to do were outside their budget and other ideas were somewhat impractical. But they did their own planning and discovered what was within their means, which is what life is all about. These kids are our future leaders and I believe that the best thing we can do is show our faith in their ability."

The number one choice of the students was to have the nation's top band, mikasa matilda, along with their awesome laser show. Copious supplies of depa were provided free of charge so that everyone could enjoy the subtle nuances of this seismic underground experience. This wasn't as successful as people had thought. The drug had a distemporal effect that made the music sound as if it were being played at one-tenth normal speed thereby rendering it incomprehensible. Still there were no regrets and a good rave was had by all.

The Ellery Erotic Dance Company accompanied the band. They performed their famous naked movements along all the aisles of the stadium. Observers are adamant that the time slowing effects of depa enhanced the appreciation of the performance. Many audience members, so to speak, joined the dancers and, although they lacked the grace of the company, they certainly contributed to the excitement.

After mikasa matilda completed their set, the Errinundera Football Association teams paraded around the stadium, culminating with the Longfoots and the visiting DePaul side being introduced by name to rousing ovations. The Mount Ellery University states that their seismic recorders showed a distinct blip at precisely the time that Mount Ellery captain and national vice-captain, horstrac, was introduced. The response was nearly as great when national squad members from villages on the mountainside appeared: joyhilla and rhusband from Goongerah; codith and especially antarcticad from Ellery Camp.

Mount Ellery is in the heart of the great plateau forest. Surely also, it is the heartland of the nation's football culture.

Students from Nook and Cranny College presented commemorative medals to the national squads and led the singing in a rowdy rendition of the football anthem "We Won't Cry for You, Errinund'ra". Ninth year student ervosa (also chosen by lottery) gave the formal opening speech thanking the folk of the city and the construction workers, in particular, for the new stadium that all will enjoy for many years to come.

http://www.gtaust.com/articles/images/JAS04lr.jpg
Preparations for the holographic movie.

The Holographic Film Company, showed their blockbuster holographic film, "The Bridge", commissioned for the opening of the stadium. The film, of course, deals with the events surrounding the McKillops Bridge massacre that sparked the successful 1905 revolution. The dramatic score, written by local composer, takovi, was performed live by the Mount Ellery Symphony Orchestra. The massacre, which forms the climactic heart of the movie, left the entire audience gasping.

Although the film was intended to conclude the ceremony, mikasa matilda held an impromptu dance party. The centre of the arena was cleared and thousands of people danced naked until the early hours of the morning.

LONGFOOTS IN AMAZING SECOND HALF BLITZ

Following their three goal first half in LordSquall a week ago, the Longfoots put in an even weirder performance against DePaul here in the Mount Ellery Cavern. Led by a hat trick by mountainside miracle worker, antarcticad, the Errinundrians piled on 5 goals, all in the second half. Yes, in one half.

With the score nil all at the break and complaints pouring in from all players about the wretched playing surface, it was feared that the match could be a disappointing dénouement to the previous day's festivities. World Cup qualification was on the line. Defeat could mean LordSquall overtaking Errinundera in the race for the second qualifying place.

The tempo of a hitherto tight game was transformed eight minutes into the second half. antarcticad who had been creative throughout the first half shaped to score but cleverly passed to nyleptha. Indeed, he was a bit too clever: nyleptha didn't expect it. Justifying the enormous reputation that the 18-year-old twins have garnered, she displayed wonderful ball control to retrieve the situation and then placed the ball deftly past the goalie's fingertips. Did she salute the crowd? No. She turned in the direction of her twin, sorais, and raised her fist in triumph.

Two minutes later there was almost a replay. Once again, an attacking antarcticad ran towards the goal. This time he did not hide his intention to pass to nyleptha. At the last moment, however, he gave the ball to sorais on his opposite side. Nonchalantly accepting the ball sorais scored as if it were the most natural thing the world, not the career first goal of a young player. And what did she do? Gave her sister an enormous one-finger salute. This earned her a yellow card. Trivia buffs are still searching the archives to see if anyone has ever before earned a yellow card for actions against a twin sister, let alone team mate.

From that point it seemed that both teams would play the game out. antarcticad had other ideas, though. He bagged a hat trick of goals, all scored in the last 20 minutes of the game. At the end of the match the fans didn't applaud. They just shook their heads in disbelief.

Match day 9 scores have been posted. (http://www.nationstates.net/forum/viewtopic.php?t=67289&postdays=0&postorder=asc&start=34)

Brittania Stretches unbeaten run.

Brittania today cemented their place at the top of Group Five with a hard fought 2-1 win over DePaul.

Before the game Jarvis Smith explained the mood in the dressing room-

"We've done extremely well in this tournament so far. We've conceded few goals, and lost only one game, and that was to but one goal again. We've managed to score a healthy number, and without injury worries I am confident that we can go out and get a result against DePaul, whom I'm sure will be looking for three points themselves.

For a good few minutes Jarvis's words seemed heeded. Brittania took the lead through a trademark McHilton Free kick at the edge of the box. However alarm bells rang as DePaul equalised with only ten minutes to go. Gambling that subsitutions would make no difference Brittania played some compelling football, and grabbed the deserved winner just two minutes from time. A looping Strazt cross headed into the top corner by Zurich.

FINAL SCORE

Brittania 2 DePaul 1
McHilton 30
Zurich 88

Brittania lining up 4-4-2.

Reeves


Jones O'Hanrahan Cannon Stacey


Strazt Junnon McHilton Simmons


Winter Zurich

Kickfooters still in with a chance
Celebration leads to muscle pulls

Gilmeecia National Stadium, Gilmeecia

In a story so bizarre it could only be attributed to random numbers, the Gilmeecian Kickfooters will enter their final qualifying match of World Cup 7 with a chance to make the tournament. Facing elimination against the visiting Sturms of Gesamtkuntswerk, the Kickfooters pulled together and played as they've never played before-- like a team.

"I'm as shocked as anyone," said Coach Bi Kikere, from the hospital bed to which she has been confined. After the final whistle blew, Kikere and those Kickfooter players intelligent enough to understand what had happened began celebrating vociferously on the sideline. "I was jumping around, some of the players tried to hoist me up, and the next thing I knew, I was blinded by shooting pains," the Coach explained. "I don't know what happened. I think I pulled about eight muscles in my back. Either that or they dropped me. Unfortunately, the lummoxes who pass for doctors around this 'country' don't know a muscle pull from a spinal injury, so we may never know exactly what happened. I can feel my toes, I can move my legs, that's all I'm really worried about. I'll be back on my feet by the final match."

Final match fraught with danger

The final day of qualifying play will see the mysterious mysterions of Nonexistentcitygrad visiting Gilmeecia. The President has issued a warning to all citizens not to stray from the secured National Stadium Zone while the enigmatic foreigners are in the country. "Hey, we're not saying they're zombies or anything," President Gilsterson said in an address to the nation yesterday. "But we know they come from a place that doesn't exist. That makes 'em freaky, in my book. So exercise caution. If you see one of 'em coming, just turn and run the other way. If one of 'em tries speaking to you, start screaming. Ground Forces'll be all over 'em before you can shake a flamethrower." Whether these comments will cement positive relations with the nation of Nonexistentcitygrad remains to be seen.

Sturms first ranked team to fall to Kickfooters
Aside from the warnings, the President was jubilant. After the Kickfooters bested the Sturms, he declared a "Day of Celebration," allowing everyone to leave their homes and party in the streets. Coach Kikere pointed out that the Sturms are the first ranked team ever to be defeated by the Kickfooters.

"It had to happen sooner or later," she said. "This hasn't been Gesamtkuntswerk's tournament. They were heavily favored to take the second qualifying spot in the group, and they're on the verge of elmination. Still, I won't be surprised if they make it in. We're going to try and do our part, and beat the nonexistent guys. Then it'll be up to the Sturms: win and advance, or lose and go home."

Current group eleven standings:

[code:1:e7db13c800]
Group 11 P W D L F A GD PTS
Snub Nose 38 9 8 1 0 28 3 +25 25
Nonexistentcitygrad 9 5 0 4 19 16 +3 15
Gesamtkuntswerk 9 4 1 4 19 15 +4 13
Gilmeecia 9 4 1 4 13 21 -8 13
Antaeus Rising 9 3 2 4 12 14 -2 11
Yatsumica 9 0 1 8 4 25 -21 1
[/code:1:e7db13c800]

These back to back victories will improve our ranks, hopefully enough to make the finals next time.

Correct Table
[code:1:6dba0a7bc8]
Name P W D L F A GD Pts
Snub Nose 38 9 8 1 0 28 3 +25 25
Nonexistentcitygrad 9 5 0 4 19 17 +2 15
Gesamtkuntswerk 9 4 1 4 19 15 +4 13
Gilmeecia 9 4 1 4 13 21 -8 13
Antaeus Rising 9 3 2 4 12 14 -2 11
Yatsumica 9 0 1 8 4 25 -21 1
[/code:1:6dba0a7bc8]

Belmore loose:<
But still go through.
See you in Lementia guys.
...............or..........
See you in Audioslavia guys.

LMAO

Belmore Loose, but still go through....


No one else find that funny? :D :D :D :D





I'll get my coat... :P

LMAO

Belmore Loose, but still go through....


No one else find that funny? :D :D :D :D





I'll get my coat... :P
Even I don't find that funny!!!

Disaster

TnUI concede their second goal in 9 matches.

"Fuck it!" Ron was quoted as saying.

[code:1:4400e06072]
Name P W D L F A GD Pts
TnUI 9 9 0 0 25 2 +23 27
Oddslavo 9 5 2 2 16 12 +4 17
Timway 9 5 1 3 24 15 +9 16
Bizarro 9 2 1 6 13 22 -9 7
God Squad 9 2 1 6 9 23 -14 7
Zihkav 9 1 1 7 7 20 -13 4
[/code:1:4400e06072]

Zurk to be deported back to Giant Zucchini after new law passed

The far right Jackass party, now in complete control of TnUI, has passed a motion to deport all non-100% Insanicians from TnUI.

"This could not have come at a worse time," said TnUI Manager Ron Manager. "Zurk is a key defender. He'll be sorely missed."

OOC: Moved from page 20, due to wreckingness by Spaam.

'What the Hell,' Says Coach After Draw

ETRIA -- Today's matchup: Etria (0-2-6), solidly at the bottom of Group 1 and one of the worst performing teams in the qualifiers, against Bedistan (4-0-4), third in the group, ranked 24th in the world, and veterans of two previous World Cups.

Not surprisingly, bookies had 4-3 odds on a Bedistani victory in this match. Unfortunately, they forgot something. Normally in the course of qualifying, the Lions have awful luck at the beginning and then wonderful luck at the end. This time, it appears to be the other way around.

Another thing the bookies had not counted on was the fact that approximately 185,000 loyal Etrian fans came out to watch the home team play. "Honestly, I was kind of intimidated by them," says an apologetic Jeff Whitehurst, Bedistani forward. The Etrian team failed to score a goal, and this can most likely be attributed to our better-than-average defense and their very weak offense. Unfortunately, the Lions also did not score a goal, apparently because they were frightened by the huge number of fans that appeared at the event. The rather boring match ended in a 0-0 draw.

"What the hell?" said team coach Jim Parker after the match. "Are my players on drugs or something? I could've beaten those guys by myself! They'll be sleeping in coach tonight, I guarantee it."

However, not all is lost. The Rhaken Kull team lost their third match in a row, this time against the Republic of Canada. This means that little has changed from last time, with Rhaken Kull, Bedistan, and the Republic of Canada all vying for the second qualifying berth in Group 1.

1. [8] Ariddia [25 points]
2. The Republic of Canada [14 points]
3. [24] Bedistan [13 points, GD +4]
4. [94] Rhaken Kull [13 points, GD -1]
5. Middleton [9 points]
6. Etria [3 points]

Two of the three tenth-round Group 1 matches will be vitally important:

[8] Ariddia vs. The Republic of Canada
and
[24] Bedistan vs. [94] Rhaken Kull

If Ariddia wins and Bedistan wins or draws, Bedistan is in.
If Ariddia wins and Rhaken Kull wins, Rhaken Kull is in.
If Canada draws and Bedistan wins, Bedistan is in.
If Canada draws and Bedistan draws, Canada is in.
If Canada draws and Rhaken Kull wins, Rhaken Kull is in.
If Canada wins, Canada is in regardless of the other result.

We believe that Ariddia will almost certainly win their match, especially with their home-field advantage. Therefore, as long as our team does not lose, we should qualify. It is hoped that our home-field advantage will give us the strength necessary to defeat Rhaken Kull.

Dammit, I could've sworn this only posted once. Oh well, at least it's only twice this time...

Kaze Progressa 1 Errinundera 4
Err goals: nylephtha (4), sorais (11), antarcticad (84), adealbata (86)
Best: adealbata, delegatensise, codith

[code:1:98b85ff16b]
Group 5 P W D L F A GD PTS
Europa Brittania 9 8 0 1 19 3 +16 24
Errinundera 9 6 1 2 18 6 +12 19
LordSquall 9 4 2 3 18 16 +2 14
DePaul 9 3 1 5 16 22 -6 10
Sliponia 9 2 1 6 10 20 -10 7
Kaze Progressa 9 1 1 7 11 25 -14 4
[/code:1:98b85ff16b]

Europa Brittania qualifies.

Errinundera qualifies.

LMAO

Belmore Loose, but still go through....


No one else find that funny? :D :D :D :D





I'll get my coat... :P

LMFAO

That is just tooooo funny :)

Hmmmm, ok, I'll fix it up.... soon,.... ish....

I've been comparing the results for these qualifiers, and for those of the European Championships. The average number of goals is still a bit out, being about 1.71 instead of about 1.35, though the standard deviation is still right. Also, the teams at the higher end are doing too well.... Only one team has an average of over 3 goals (France), whereas, there are 7 here, at least 5 too many. Likewise, for over 2.5: 4 to 19, which is at least 10 too many. So yeah. If you look at the graph of For vs Against, for both qualifiers, you can see the difference:

http://www.it.usyd.edu.au/~jedrake/temp/untitled.jpg

The sheet I used is here: http://www.it.usyd.edu.au/~jedrake/temp/stats.xls

Hmmmm, ok, I'll fix it up.... soon,.... ish....

I've been comparing the results for these qualifiers, and for those of the European Championships. The average number of goals is still a bit out, being about 1.71 instead of about 1.35, though the standard deviation is still right. Also, the teams at the higher end are doing too well.... Only one team has an average of over 3 goals (France), whereas, there are 7 here, at least 5 too many. Likewise, for over 2.5: 4 to 19, which is at least 10 too many. So yeah. If you look at the graph of For vs Against, for both qualifiers, you can see the difference:

http://www.it.usyd.edu.au/~jedrake/temp/untitled.jpg

The sheet I used is here: http://www.it.usyd.edu.au/~jedrake/temp/stats.xls

Hmmmm, ok, I'll fix it up.... soon,.... ish....

I've been comparing the results for these qualifiers, and for those of the European Championships. The average number of goals is still a bit out, being about 1.71 instead of about 1.35, though the standard deviation is still right. Also, the teams at the higher end are doing too well.... Only one team has an average of over 3 goals (France), whereas, there are 7 here, at least 5 too many. Likewise, for over 2.5: 4 to 19, which is at least 10 too many. So yeah. If you look at the graph of For vs Against, for both qualifiers, you can see the difference:

http://www.it.usyd.edu.au/~jedrake/temp/untitled.jpg

The sheet I used is here: http://www.it.usyd.edu.au/~jedrake/temp/stats.xls

GROUP 2: RUNAWAY MOOSE [18], LIVERPOOL ENGLAND [41] QUALIFY FOR CUP

The two teams, now on 20 and 19 points respectively, are well ahead of third-placed Pavesia who on 14 points cannot catch up. Pavesia are due to visit Liverpool England in their last match, however the LEICF (or our FA, so to speak) are requesting that the match be played on neutral ground in Audioslavia or Lemmitania (sp?) due to an in-Heartland conflict which has put Liverpool England on a highest alert status: Code RED.
In Group Fifteen, second-placed Oddslavo who are unranked have lost to TnUI 4-1, being the second nation only to have scored against the TnUI-ans.
(edit: Insanicians, lol.)
[code:1:2a6fea0938]
Group 2 P W D L F A GD Points
Runaway Moose 9 6 2 1 17 5 12 20
Liverpool England 9 6 1 2 22 10 12 19
Pavesia 9 4 2 3 21 17 4 14
Commerce Heights 9 2 3 4 13 18 -5 9
Praetorian Rome 9 2 1 6 8 18 -10 7
Int-gallactic Hell 9 2 1 6 9 22 -13 7
[/code:1:2a6fea0938]

Unfortunately, your match falls on a major matchday in the Audioslavian Division One, so there are few major stadiums available. However, seing as Peltier Park is closed for renovation in time for the World Cup, you could use that stadium :)

Unfortunately, there cant be any crowd due to the seats being repainted, so the match will be effectively held "behind closed doors". The pitch however, is more than playable and your team are welcome to play out your remaining home group games there :)

TnUI-ans.

Insanicians.

Unfortunately, your match falls on a major matchday in the Audioslavian Division One, so there are few major stadiums available. However, seing as Peltier Park is closed for renovation in time for the World Cup, you could use that stadium :)

Unfortunately, there cant be any crowd due to the seats being repainted, so the match will be effectively held "behind closed doors". The pitch however, is more than playable and your team are welcome to play out your remaining home group games there :)

We will accept the offer. we only need to use it until 20 Sept.

Noooooo! I lost my perfect record!!!! :evil:

[code:1:d47dbd8676]Team P W D L F A GD Pts
Squornshelous 9 8 1 0 23 3 +20 25[/code:1:d47dbd8676]

weel, even tho were not doing to well, i'm glad CH is eliminated

weel, even tho were not doing to well, i'm glad CH is eliminated
After this quote was printed in newspapers throughout Commerce Heights, rumors are spreading that Manhattanite spectators at the Intergallactic Hell game are going to be chanting "WE'RE NUMBER TWO!", referring to Commerce Heights' second-highest draw total in the WC7 qualifiers... :P

Table and resuts updated: http://nswcc.tripod.com/results.html

In:

Ariddia
Runaway Moose
Liverpool England
Ravenspire
Tanah Burung
Dark Outcasts
One Red Dot
Europa Brittania
Errinundera
Halfassedstates
Akbarland
Kingsford
Busby
Lunatic Goofballs
Pure Evil
Oglethorpia
Giant Zucchini
Quohog
Snub Nose 38
Squornshelous
Malundar
Dennisov
Svecia
Total n Utter Insanity

Not Yet Decided:

Group 1: The Republic of Canada (100-1), Bedistan (2-1), Rhaken Kull (2-1)
Group 11: Nonexistentcitygrad (2-1), Gesamtkuntswerk (2-1), Gilmeecia (4-1)
Group 13: Spaam (1-1), Christofi (100-1)
Group 14: Haraki (1-1), South Euroland (100-1)
Group 15: Oddslavo (3-2), Timway (3-2)

Place your bets now :twisted:

News item from the Ellery Camp Pravda

http://english.pravda.ru/new/images/head_08_a.gif

ZENZA'S PULSE QUICKENS
IN ELLERY CAMP

http://www.ausport.gov.au/fulltext/2001/ascmedia/images/799-0003.jpg
Zenza Jenal is put through his paces by
Institute of Sport trainer, thusio.

The latest football exchange student from the Tanah Burung
village of Findabaya, Zenza Jenal, is finding Errinundera, in
general, and Ellery Camp, in particular, an eye-opening experience.
"The guys who came here over the last four years have told me
about their experiences but this place is not like I imagined it all. I
thought it would be like home: the same forests, the same history
and the same politics. How wrong can you be?"

Prompted by these comparisons we asked him to explain. Are the
forests so different? "It's like the difference between a mosque, a
cathedral and a Hindu or Buddhist temple. They each arouse awe
and reverence but experience of one cannot prepare you for the
others. I love my native forest more but I am still overwhelmed by
what you have here." The best thing about our forest? "You don't
have crocodiles." The worst? "The leeches. We have them in
Findabaya but our ones are lemurs compared with the orang
utangs you have here. I woke up the other morning with a bloated
one in my pubes. Fortunately, the young lady in the neigbouring
branch heard me shout. She was so nice about removing it."

The budding soccer star is also keen to learn about the history and
politics of Errinundera. "As you know, Tanah Burung's history in the
last two hundred years or so is mainly about colonisation and our
struggle to achieve independence. Your history is about the
struggle to overthrow a corrupt monarchy and then a puritanical
military dictatorship. Yet the two nations have such similar political
outlooks. It's like the forests: so alike yet so different. I'm
especially keen to visit McKillops Bridge to see the site where the
1905 revolution began. And then I want to go First Creek Falls
where the 1941 liberation campaign had its roots."

But it's not just history and sightseeing that has brought Zenza
Jenal to Ellery Camp. "Football is the reason for it all. I met the
national squad after the opening ceremony at the Mount Ellery
Cavern. sorais is such a cool dude! Imagine getting yellow carded
in consecutive matches for making obscene gestures at your own
twin sister. Errinundrians don't seem to mind. I guess the
Mezitzian referees are a bit more uptight about these sorts of
things. Anyway, I'm so looking forward to studying under
antarcticad at the Academy and training with him and codith in the
Ellery Camp squad. And to think that codith was an exchange
student in Tanah Burung. Now she's in the Errinundrian national
side. My aim is to follow in the footsteps of Canabe Livit who has
become a Crocodile."

14 year old bakerd, swinging upside-down from one of lofty
branches of Ellery Camp's sacred tree, PELLOCAR, had his priorities
right. "The best thing is that I have a postcard from all the other
Tanah Burung footballers who came here. It's so ace getting them
from them from so far away."

http://www.undp.east-timor.org/Photogal/images/Soccer.jpg
Postcard from Canabe Livit to bakerd

In:
Ariddia...Total n Utter Insanity (24 teams)

Not Yet Decided:
Group 1: Group 11: Group 13: Group 14: Group 15: (5 teams)
Place your bets now :twisted:
What did I miss?
That's 24 qualified, 5 yet to be decided, and 2 autoqualifiers (hosts).
24+5+2=31 :?:

Relooked the charts - Group 10, The Belmore Family should also be listed
as Qualified. That would make 25 Qualified, and add up to 32. Yes? No?
:?:

NEWSFLASH:

Giant Zucchini visited ENRG with a full strength squad, effectively thrashing them to a 0-6 defeat. Scoring immediately began in the 4th minute, when a bullet of a shot evaded the ENRG keeper, Urk putting the Zucchinis ahead with a long range effort. By the 21st minute, Urk was at it again, Kerrnigit providing a defence-splitting pass through the centre and Urk beating the offside trap to find the ball with only the keeper to beat. Urk proceeded to chip the ball over the onrushing keeper into the top right corner of the goal with the outside of his right foot, bringing the Zucchinis two up. Meanwhile, on the other end, Oog was doing a fine job stopping some brilliant shots from the ENRG side and keeping the lead. Urk continued his dominance, scoring his hat-trick in the 44th minute when a well taken corner from Kerrnigit made contact with Urk's flying overhead kick. The ball rebounded off the crossbar and into the goal with blistering pace and power, leaving the ENRG keeper no chance. Things continued brightly for the Zucchinis in the second half, Urk coming off for the Zucchinis' latest entry into the national squad, TnUI deport Zurk, increasing the Zucchinis' defensive wall. He immediately made an impact, scoring with a strong header from another corner from Kerrnigit in the 48th minute. The Zucchinis continued their dominance, Kerrnigit scoring a trademark free kick from the right flank in the 67th minute, dispatching a curling ball which clipped the inside of the far post before rebounding into the goal. Phoot finished off the scoring when he latched on another defence-splitting Kerrnigit pass and slid the ball under the hapless keeper, finishing the score off in the 79th minute. Head Coach Mr Hurr, "I am pleased with my team. They have started to take off both in terms of technical skill as well as mental grit. Also, their boost in confidence as well as form cannot be a bad thing. We now just hope we can carry this all the way into the World Cup. We have a real chance now."

The dreaded match day 10 results have been posted.

Qualified ORD Stretches Goal Difference

Although ORD has already qualified for the World Cup, the Dottians still handed out a thrashing to host Bullonien yesterday, increasing the goal difference by 4 more goals to none.

STONE's hat trick caused an uproar on the ORD side of the stadium as Bullonien's defenders saw no way to intercept him at the 18th, 39th and 76th minute. HASHIEI also scored a goal at the 59th minute.

In today's match, ORD defeated Aquilla 3-0 at the Royal Red Dot Stadium. STONE scored two goals at the 32nd and 59th minute and DURSLEY scored at the 72nd minute.


Head Coach Alvin Ker said that he is extremely pleased at how the game was played in the two days, saying how the players refuse to rest on their laurels although they had already been qualified. He added that the World Cup will be even tougher than the previous World Cup as most of the qualified teams are seeded and only a handful are unseeded. History might repeat itself yet again, seeing us walking out of the door when the Group Stage is finished.

Let's have a fianl look at the Group 4 Qualifying Table:

[code:1:56eedcfdd8]
Group 4 (Day 10) P W D L F A GD T
15 Dark Outcasts 10 9 1 0 29 5 24 28
21 One Red Dot 10 8 0 2 28 7 21 24
51 Aquilla 10 4 2 4 17 21 -4 14
Grand master Mark 10 3 1 6 13 23 -10 10
Bullonien 10 3 0 7 7 20 -13 9
Pablicosta 10 0 2 8 11 29 -18 2
[/code:1:56eedcfdd8]




OOC: What are Uberpower, Superpowers, Powers and Classic Teams in the NSWCC website? What must be done to gain status to the following categories. Just feel that there should be some transparency about it.

[code:1:5ea7320993]
Group 11 P W D L F A GD PTS
Snub Nose 38 10 9 1 0 35 3 +32 28
Nonexistentcitygrad 10 5 1 4 20 18 +2 16
Gesamtkuntswerk 10 4 2 4 21 17 +4 14
Gilmeecia 10 4 2 4 14 22 -8 14
Antaeus Rising 10 3 3 4 14 16 -2 12
Yatsumica 10 0 1 9 4 32 -28 1
[/code:1:5ea7320993]
Snub Nose 38 - Qualified
Nonexistentcitygrad - Qualified
-------------------------------------
*the spacious and well appointed penthouse offices of the minister of athletics, olympics, and alcoholic beverages. a butler stands just inside the doorway. the minister is sitting at the polished baby grand piano. a second butler has delivered another cold beer, a "38 special, to the minister on a silver platter, and is wiping up the mess he made when he spilled the previous one. sitting at the ministers huge mahogany desk, where several new medals seem to have joined his previous award, is margaret. margaret is wearing a silk burgundy robe, and a brocade silver (real silver) and midnight blue hooded cape. she is holding a small leather pouch, with two eagle feathers tied to it by a silver thread. neatly mounted on the wall over the fireplace is a bronzed rubber chicken. we can see a large refrigerator in the next room through the connecting french doors. it has an embossed sign on it that says "margaret's chickens - for sacrificial supplication of the random number gods only. do not touch. this means you". the minister looks up from the pages of the afternoon "scuttlebutt"*

- Margaret!! They won the game!!
- Match.
- Here.
- Not a "match" as in 'light my cigar'. Match as in 'football match'.
- What does a football match? A volleyball?
- (aside to herself - I am really gonna hafta hurt him) No. Not "what does a football match". A "Football Match" is what we call a game of football.
- Why?
- Shut up.
- Well, anyway, the Hooligans won again!
- You betcha, bub. These real chickens are the real McCoy.
- So, where do we go to collect the World Cuppy thing?
- What are you talking about?
- We won. We get the Cuppy thing. Where do we go to get it?
- (aside to herself again - Soon. I hafta hurt him soon.) What we won, bozo boy, is the chance to play in the World Cup 7 tournament. We won our group - 6 sides, the 2 with the best record in home and away play get to compete for the Cup.
- ...so...we...might...not...win?
- There are 31 other international sides who also qualified for this tournament. I'm sure they're gonna do everything they can to see to it that we lose, and they win.
- I thought we won...
- The Hooligans won 9 out of 10 qualifying matches, and tied the 10th. They scored 35 goals, and had 3 scored against them.
- But...they might not win the Cuppy thing.
- They did GREAT!! We should be proud of them.
- But...
- You are a sad case.
- ...if they lose the Cuppy thing, I might have to give back some of my medals.
- I am now going to hurt you.

*margaret gets up and approaches the minister. the minister jumps up, spilling his "38 special", and backs away. margaret continues at him, at a quickened pace. the butler starts wiping up the beer. the minister turns and runs through the french doors into the next room. margaret runs after him, picking up the poker as she passes the fireplace.*

*pause*

- OUCH!!

YAAAAAAHHHHHHHOOOOOOOOOO we are through

World Cup Qualifiers End

Sargard, Ravenspire (AP) -- The Ravenspire national football team, which had previously locked a qualifying slot, played it easy for the final matches of the qualifiers, making use of substitute players in order to allow key strikers and defenders to rest for the Cup proper. A pair of 2-1 victories over Freedom Country and Alisdair I Frosticus resulted in the Ravens finishing at the top of their group.

Goals:

@Freedom Country: Kaede Kitsuki (33), Zhen Sui-Ling (72)
Alisdair I Frosticus@: Arawn Frost (40), Kaede Kitsuki (55)

Brittania round off Qualification with another win.

Fresh from Winning Qualification through to the next round, Brittania hosted LordSquall at the Machar Sports Stadium. An understandbly small crowd of 15,000 turned out to see a Youthful Brittanian Team rout DePaul 4-1.

Brittania lined up-

----------------Hansen------------------

Carella----O'Hanrahan---Weller----Stacey


-----Urqhart-----Huntly-----Lhitomer------


----------------Lionel---------------------


----------Farimer-------Carter------------


Brittania lined up in an adventerous 4-3-1-2, with no less than four players recieving their first International Cap at senior level.

Brittania took the lead from a corner on twelve minutes, a neat flick on from Huntly falling for Lionel to volley nicely into the net.

The lead was doubled when a throughball from Lionel found Carter, who kept his nerve to round the keeper and score.

DePaul brought one back on the stroke of half time, with the inexperience of O'Hanrahan & Weller gifting the DP forward an oppertunity he did not waste.

Brittania killed off the game on fifty seven minutes, a cheeky chip by Farimer somehow caught the DP Keeper sleeping, dipping just under the crossbar to make it 3-1.

Huntly grabbed his second International senior goal with a fine free kick blasted straight into the top of the net, after Lionel was fouled inside the box.

FINAL SCORE-

Europa Brittania 4 DePaul 1
Lionel 12
Carter 35
Farimer 57
Huntly 79

OOC: What are Uberpower, Superpowers, Powers and Classic Teams in the NSWCC website? What must be done to gain status to the following categories. Just feel that there should be some transparency about it.

General categories I have put people in till I get some spare time at some weekend to do it properly.

Great Things in Store for Lions in Third Cup Appearance

COLUMBIA, FD -- At the start of today's qualifying matches, the Bedistan Lions were in third place in Group One. Rhaken Kull was equal on points, though behind on goal difference. The Republic of Canada lay one point ahead of both.

The whole team knew that this game had to be won. They knew that they would need to play their very hearts out.

As the national anthem played prior to the match, each and every person in the eighty-two thousand plus seats of Holmes Stadium was hoping with all their might that the Lions would carry the day. We had to defeat Rhaken Kull.

Both teams came out fighting at the opening whistle. Possession went back and forth for much of the first half, but Bedistan got full control after about thirty minutes. Jeff Whitehurst proved that he knew what he was doing out there. He sent a rocket of a shot at the Rhaken Kull net, and the ball was just traveling too fast for their keeper to have even the slimmest chance of stopping it. The crowd erupted as the scoreboard showed: Bedistan 1 - 0 Rhaken Kull.

The second half began in much the same fashion, although this time the Lions regained control more quickly. It was now time for the other Bedistani forward to show the crowd what he was there for. At the fifty-four minute mark, he slammed another goal into the net. Bedistan 2 - 0 Rhaken Kull. The visitors knew they were in deep trouble now.

In the sixtieth minute, the Rhaken Kull team made their first significant attempt to regain the lost ground. However, Olivia Bream has proven time and again that it is not that easy to get the ball past her. She easily took care of the shot and gave it to her teammates, so that they could turn it into an attack of their own. Shortly thereafter, Lisa Young took control of the ball and fired it at the Rhaken Kull net. This time, the keeper was able to keep it out, but unfortunately, he directed the ball straight to Whitehurst, who wasted no time in scoring his second of the day. Bedistan 3 - 0 Rhaken Kull.

The final nail was driven into Rhaken Kull's coffin when Leigh Black, new midfield sensation, sent yet another ball into the opposing net. It was only the second time that the Bedistan Lions had ever scored four goals in a single match. The scoreboard proudly displayed: Bedistan 4 - 0 Rhaken Kull. The visitors knew their World Cup Seven campaign had come to a close.

For the first time in the three World Cup qualifiers the Lions have participated in, they have qualified outright. It is certain that this will prove to be a great sign for their future in World Cup Seven. The hearts of millions of fans will travel with their team to Audioslavia and beyond.

Final score:
Bedistan 4 (Whitehurst 36, 63; Lewis 55; Black 80)
Rhaken Kull 0

Final Group 1 standings:
[code:1:8f6aaec432]
Group 1 P W D L F A GD PTS
Ariddia 10 9 1 0 40 13 +27 28
Bedistan 10 5 1 4 17 9 +8 16
The Republic of Canada 10 4 2 4 18 19 -1 14
Rhaken Kull 10 4 1 5 19 24 -5 13
Middleton 10 3 0 7 11 24 -13 9
Etria 10 1 3 6 9 25 -16 6
[/code:1:8f6aaec432]

With several key players resting for the Cup, Errinundera stole a win against Sliponia at the Milosis Coliseum in McKillops Bridge.

Errinundera 1 Sliponia 0
Err goal: joyhilla (89)
Err best: scaroline, sedinburgh, longipesp

[code:1:9fe59b9922]
Group 5 P W D L F A GD PTS
Europa Brittania 10 9 0 1 23 4 +19 27
Errinundera 10 7 1 2 19 6 +13 22
LordSquall 10 4 2 4 19 20 -1 14
DePaul 10 3 2 5 17 23 -6 11
Sliponia 10 2 1 7 10 21 -11 7
Kaze Progressa 10 1 2 7 12 26 -14 5
[/code:1:9fe59b9922]

Oglethorpia Rolls Through Krieland and Terranos

Oglethorpia faced off with World Cup Seven's fourth worst team for the second time, Krieland. Danny Bolton opened things up with a header off Fitzgerald's attempt which hit the left-post in the 12th. Bolton once again knocked one in from outside the goalie's box in the 36th, and completed his hat trick with yet another goal 7 minutes after the half, his second career hat trick.

Stewart would score another after Fitzgerald cut the ball up field, Stewart completing the play in the 63rd. Fitzgerald closed up shop for Oglethorpia, bringing the match to 5-nil in the 76th off a free kick. Oglethorpia had a total of 12 drives, 73 percent possession, keeping Krieland down to only 3 drives in the entire game.

Oglethorpia 5
Krieland 0

Bolton 12, 36, 57, Stewart 63, Fitzgerald 76

Oglethorpia would then face off with Terranos in an away game; Oglethorpia as the highest seeded competitor got off on a shaky start, Bolton giving up the ball on what seemed like another strong drive. He soon rebounded making the score 1-nil in the 36th, Stewart knocking one in right before the half. Fitzgerald would once again score the final goal, Oglethorpia 3, Terranos 0.

Oglethorpia preformed admirably throughout qualifying with a single loss, no draws and nine wins.

Oglethorpia 3
Terranos 0
Bolton 34, Stewart 45, 56

[code:1:19b9c26877]
Group 9 P W D L F A GD Points
Oglethorpia 10 9 0 1 37 10 27 27
Giant Zucchini 10 9 0 1 27 1 26 27
Terranos 10 4 1 5 9 18 -9 13
ENRG 10 4 1 5 11 21 -10 13
Mezitzia 10 2 1 7 15 24 -9 7
Krieland 10 0 1 9 3 22 -19 1

[/code:1:19b9c26877]

Football Wrapup: World Cup Qualifying

Mike White: Well Don, Oglethorpia has come out on top of Group 9, preforming admirably throughout.

Don Crowhurst: For sure Mike. Oglethorpia saw it's only loss to Giant Zucchini, the only other seeded team in Group 9. Oglethorpia came out 9-0-1.

Mike White: We saw the god-awful team from Krieland finally earn a point with a tie against Metzitzia, who unfortunately also had a losing record.

Don Crowhurst: Krieland was owned a second time by Oglethorpia who once again came through and swept them 5-nil.

Mike White: It almost trivializes the fact that Danny Bolton has two hat tricks among 10 World Cup games.

Don Crowhurst: He's proven himself as a very valueable striker. It's amazing to see Oglethorpia play as one of the top 5 qualifiers through WC6, then come into WC7 with only 4 remaining veteran-World Cup players and lose only 1 out of 10 qualifying games.

Mike White: The real test is going into the group stages, when the competition is much closer and against much more talented teams.

Don Crowhurst: Well, we'll be bringing you live coverage of Oglethorpia's first group-match when the groups are finalized and Oglethorpia goes in to see how far their WC bid takes them.

Mike White: Right Don. The best of luck to team captain Phillip Bjorn and his crew, we're really pulling for them. A big congrats to Ray Krusen for living up to Oglethorpia's WC record. For Donald Crowhurst, i'm Mike White. See you later folks.

NEWSFLASH: LIVERPOOL ENGLAND WIN DESPITE RESTING KEY PLAYERS, ODDSLAVO OUSTED ON LAST DAY AFTER LOSS TO GOD SQUAD

An interview with Tanah Burung coach Guntur Ruak:

Q. Tanah Burung has qualified for the Cup, in second spot behind Ravenspire. Are you satisfied with the team's play?

A. Very much. You have to remember we are second on goal difference, and we have still never been defeated by Ravenspire. My father used to tell me a story about the revolution: It is not about the most glorious visotries. It is not about how many villages have been liberated. It is not about individual glory. You must always fight, and always resist defeat. To resist, that alone, is already to win. And so with this Cup: our goal was to qualify undefeated, and we have met that goal.

Q. You didn't rest your stars like some other teams in your final two matches. Why not?

A. We took Nikea very seriously. Sure, we may not like their government very much. That's why the players unveiled a half-time banner that said "Human Rights Now!" But we respect their footballing skills. We needed the first stringers there. Yosepha Syahrir and Wim van Esterik got their goals, and i'm not sure reserves would have done as well.

Q. And Trafari?

A. Not as weak as some say. They did beat Freedom Country, after all. Syahrir scored another goal, which I think vindicates my decision to start an untried teenager at the second striker position. And Cavaco with the other goal.

Q. Any thoughts on your predecessor's work in Gilmeecia?

A. A great injustice was done to Bi Kikere after the last Cup. It is true that our defeat against Lunatic Goofballs was the darkest day in the history of Tanah Burung sports. It's true that she made an error in judgement when she decided to play in goal herself. Bi Kikere was a star in World Cup 2, but she is not a young woman any more. But she did a great job, and the way she found 11 Gilmeecians who were able to distinguish their own goal from the other team's and do great things with them is incredible. She not only got them through qualifying without a single fatality, she led them to a couple of wins over some countries with real teams, and even over World Cup veteran Gesamkuntswerk. She is clearly a genius. I'm just glad I have a long-term contract. Also, of course, I am glad I do not have to live in Gilmeecia.

Tanah Burung qualifying record: 8 wins, 2 draws, no losses.

Top scorers:
David Cavaco 7
Yosepha Syahrir 4
Wim van Esterik 3
Canabe Livit 2
Cassie da Cruz 1
Rosa Bibere 1

Kickfooters miss tournament
Coach declares satisfaction with performance

Gilmeecia National Stadium, Gilmeecia

In the final match of qualifying, the Kickfooters today drew the nonexistent players of Nonexistencitygrad one-all. Though this was not enough to bring Gilmeecia up in the group standings, Coach Bi Kikere pronounced herself "extremely satisfied" with the team's performance overall.

"We got off to a rocky start. There's no question about it. For a while I wondered whether I should have rounded up some of those legendary Gilmeecian zombies to play," Coach Kikere said at the post-match press conference. "You can at least give zombies simple instructions like 'Kick the ball.' But as the qualifiers went on, some of the players began to understand what to do. It was really a fascinating thing to watch."

Some independent observers, including anthropologists from Lovejoy State College in neighboring Loro Sae, have suggested that the Gilmeecian players learned the game through mimicry. "It's one of the more common modes of learning in the animal kingdom," according to Dr. Dwine Winebaka, a professor at LSC who specializes in the study of primitive tribes who have been cut off from normal society by dictatorial regimes. "You find even the higher reptiles and lower mammals using mimicry to pass on survival strategies from one generation to the next. So it's no surprise that primates such as the Gilmeecians would be able to utilize the strategy."

"Yeah, they definitely learned a lot just by watching their opponents," Kikere agreed. "Not anything as football strategy-- that they got by having rocks pounded against their heads-- sort of a punishment-reward system. But they learned simpler skills by mimicking players on the opposing sides. For example, [goalkeeper Gilgabody] Gilmooster didn't start diving for the ball until he saw the 'keeper from Snub Nose 38 do that a couple times in our third match. It took three matches before our strikers started kicking the ball properly-- and I think they learned that from watching the opposing players, too. They sure as hell didn't seem to pick anything up from our practices, that's for sure."

Although President Gilsterson is said to have briefly considered having the team executed for failing to qualify, Kikere had no reservations in praising the team. "They did a far better job than anyone had a right to expect. Four wins, two draws, four losses-- an even record after ten matches. That's truly amazing. I have high hopes for our continued chances in international play. I make no secret of the fact that I came to Gilmeecia to build a winner. And this was a great first step."

<semi-OOC>An extensive history of the longstanding football rivalry between Audioslavia and Lemmitania, written by Audioslavian commentator Jeremy Gaffacakes, has been posted at http://nswcc.tripod.com .</semi-OOC>

<OOC>Groups will be announced tomorrow AM (NAEST). Matches will begin 9/13.</OOC>

TIMWAY ADVANCES

Timway's Tigers advanced into their first world cup proper earlier this afternoon, due to a 3-1 victory over Bizarro and Oddslavo's loss to God Squad. Goalkeeper and captain Anton Carlsson had a spectacular game, saving 11 shots while allowing one past in the 88th minute, once the celebration was well underway. Timway's young star, Manolo Hasta, scored the games first two goals, in the 11th and 44th minutes. Veteran midfielder Henrick Johanson also scored, putting in a header in the 73rd minute. Coach Pablo Rolla had this to say: "We are elated to qualify for the cup. We faced a very tough challenge from upstarts Oddslavo, but our perseverance has been rewarded." And it was a good thing for Mr Rolla too, as Timway's last coach was fired after last Cup qualifying, when a Timway loss coupled with an Errinundera victory put Errinundera into the cup while Timway watched at home. This reversal certainly puts him in the good graces of the Timway Football Federation, and his contract is expected to be renewed.

NEWSFLASH:

Giant Zucchini continued its run of form against Mezitzia, defeating them 4-1. Giant Zucchini celebrated its home win with 2 brilliant goals from Urk, 1 brilliant free kick from Kerrnigit, and a header from Phoot, while Zurk conceded a penalty, which Mezitzia took to earn their consolation. Head Coach Mr Hurr, "This win is important for us, not so much in qualifying but more in terms of form and momentum. We have bounced back, but we must prove yet again that we are of Cup winning calibre."

Belmore Qualify
Well this explains it all...
[code:1:73b6731454]
Group 10 P W D L F A GD Points
Quohog10 10 0 0 35 2 32 30
The Belmore Family10 7 0 3 28 13 15 21
Dyelli Beybi10 4 0 6 14 17 -3 12
The Weegies10 2 2 6 13 26 -13 8
New-Persia10 2 2 6 11 26 -15 8
Fart wars 10 2 2 6 10 27 -17 8
[/code:1:73b6731454]

Any chance of a rankings table after the qualifing stages....

Quohog Information Minister Baanes Dosti: "My fellow citizens, I know that there has been a bit of upheaval in the last several weeks, but I ask the country to come together to support our national football team who has qualified for World Cup VII with a perfect 10-0-0 record. Including the last cup and its qualifiers, our team has compiled a 28 wins in 31 games, with the losses coming in World Cup VI to Errinundera and TnUI in the qualifiers, and Brazillico in the Finals. It is fairly safe to say that we are the team to beat in the football world today. Our players and the coaches have put a lot of time and energy into this, and there is great hope that we can take the Cup this year. That being said, one can never take such a prize for granted. There are several other teams which pose a very serious threat to us, and we will just have to see into which group we are drawn, and then how the team performs.

"Now, on the subject of the recent... unrest, we can now definitively say that the rebellion's leaders have been apprehended and are currently being... interrogated. Maw Ltd. has been shut down due to their connection with the rebels, and Mar Baxxy, who recently gained fame for his interactions in Errinundera, was killed in the fighting. We found documents on his body which definitively proved that he was lying about his relations with people in power in Errinundera, and that he really didn't comprehend the ongoing situation. This will hopefully allow us to make-up with the Errinunderans, who have been outraged (in their own way) at our reaction to the situation based on Baxxy's false knowledge. Maw Ltd. did seem to be a major contributor to the right-wing fascist rebels, but outside influence is strongly suspected. We will, of course, tell you more when we have a better understanding of who these people are, and why they decided to try to overthrow the government at this point in time."

Groups will be announced tomorrow AM (NAEST). Matches will begin 9/13.

willd, Errinundera's Protector of various things, he is always forgetting which: I don't understand this announcement from Gilmeecia. It says that WC7 will begin 9/13. What does he mean?

filthyl, Errinundera's Protector of Sport: I was wondering about that too. My theory, from the context, is that it signifies the starting date.

willd: But the 9th of which month? There isn't a 13th month.

filthyl: My research shows that the native primates there have a lifecycle which is based on 2 week bio-rhythmic patterns. My guess is that the Gilmeecians have 24 months to the year. That would mean that the World Cup 7 games would commence next July.

willd: That's a good long break. fionar has told me the team needs a good long break in some remote, uncontactable location where they can just hang about and forget the rest of the world...

...Hang about. This is September right? September is the 9th month. The 13 must represent the year.

filthyl: As far as I know, no participating World Cup 7 team has a national calendar that has a current year or a next year that ends in 13. It must mean the Cup begins next July.

willd: Are you sure? I tell ya, it'd make much more sense if it were starting on 13/9...

...Another thing is odd. Why is a trog nation like Gilmeecia making this announcement? I thought Lemmitania and Audioslavia were hosting WC7.

filthyl: I think Glimeecia and Lemmitania have some sort of symbiotic relationship.

willd: Like some of the people here and their wombats, under the new marriage laws?

filthyl: Yeah. Sort of.

Table and results updated!
http://nswcc.tripod.com/results.html

In other ooc news, due to my recent bad health, I've had to go part-time at uni. The upside to this is.... you've got me online for another 9 months :P So, free tables for at least the next 5 World Cups ;) And since that is the case, I will be making a bid for WCIX, with anyone superpower would like to join with me. Only condition is, you must not plan on going away at any time during that cup :P

Table and results updated!
http://nswcc.tripod.com/results.html

In other ooc news, due to my recent bad health, I've had to go part-time at uni. The upside to this is.... you've got me online for another 9 months :P So, free tables for at least the next 5 World Cups ;) And since that is the case, I will be making a bid for WCIX, with anyone superpower would like to join with me. Only condition is, you must not plan on going away at any time during that cup :P

I'll host with you.

*goes to book his holidays*

Any chance of a rankings table after the qualifing stages....

Yep, at the weekend when I'm not so busy. Or maybe tonight if I'm not too knackered.

Ok, could someone check my tables? I'm pretty sure they're right, but with 450 games to record, I'm not perfect :P

~looks forward to a mere 240 games for WCVIII~

Dyelli-Beybi 0 - The Weegies 3.

I'm still recovering from the shock of that result...

Surely some kudos for soundly beating a seed, yes?

:D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D

I'm so happy...

Ok, RP coming after I have dinner, but I just want to warn you all....

Spaam is unbeaten in the Main Round of the World Cup. Thats right.... Spaam has NEVER been beaten in the Main Round of a World Cup. So beware :twisted:

Ok, could someone check my tables? I'm pretty sure they're right, but with 450 games to record, I'm not perfect :P

~looks forward to a mere 240 games for WCVIII~
Your tables have Group 11 correct

The World Cup Seven Draw: How it will work

The teams from pot 1 (hosts and highest ranked teams) will be allocated a group each from A to H. Then the teams from pot 2 will each be randomly allocated a group, then pot 3, then pot 4 the same way. The pots are (rank is on the left):

Pot One
8 Lemmitania
20 Audioslavia
2 Quohog
3 Spaam
4 Erriundera
5 Halfassedstates
6 Snub Nose 38
7 TnUI

Pot Two
9 Ariddia
11 Svecia
12 Kingsford
13 Oglethorpia
14 Lunatic Goofballs
15 Squornshelous
16 Dark Outcasts
19 Runaway Moose

Pot Three
21 Tanah Burung
22 One Red Dot
23 Dennisov
24 Europa Brittania
25 Bedistan
27 Akbarland
28 Malundar
29 The Belmore Family

Pot Four
42 Liverpool England
36 Ravenspire
39 Busby
37 Pure Evil
34 Giant Zucchini
100 Nonexistantcitygrad
33 Haraki
46 Timway

The draw will take place later on today, and the first round will start probably around monday (because Lemmys gonna have to make a new spreadsheet :P)

oh yeah, and Audioslavia are in group A, and Lemmitania are in group E. The hosts are always in seperate halves of the draw :)

We also need to do something about the formula....
Basically, it should be harder for teams to score goals.
Also, perhaps we could just make it so the ranking only affects defense? This means that ranking doesn't have as much emphasis on the scores, and reflects the fact that teams get where they are based on defense, not attack.

Spaam Breathes Sigh Of Relief

With Dennisov's 3-1 win over Christofi just hours before, Spaam breathed a sigh of relief as they realised that they had made it past qualifiers, in yet another nail biting group. Spaam had not had to qualify for a World Cup in over a decade, but when they had, always had a tough time of it. This year was no exception, even though Spaam is currently ranked number 3 in the world. Perhaps the relief was obvious, as Spaam sauntered to a simple 1 nil win over bottom of the table Ribenia. Méla Sëhelin scored her 11th goal of the qualifiers in the 23rd minute, and Spaam effectively played down the remaining hour.
Méla Sëhelin has now scored at least one goal in every qualifying match, and proven herself to be Spaam's star striker, along with Rohir Dorth, who has scored 10 goals in the qualifiers, including a hattrick against Jacktazea in the previous match. These two teenagers have been setting the Football world on fire with their top-class talent. There is no doubt of Spaam's attacking prowress, but the question remains, can Spaam improve its defense?
In any case, Spaam will be hoping it keeps its run in the Main Round, as being one of the very few teams to have never been beaten in the main round of the World Cup.

[code:1:fb75710eff]
7. Méla Sëhelin: 11
8. Rohir Dorth: 10
6. Fin Teinwë: 2
3. Inwë Lossë: 1
12. Darát Ar-Fein: 1
[/code:1:fb75710eff]

Group A
Audioslavia
Kingsford
Malundar
Liverpool England

Group B
Total 'n Utter Insanity
Oglethorpia
One Red Dot
Busby

Group C
Errinundera
Lunatic Goofballs
Bedistan
Haraki

Group D
Quohog
Runaway Moose
Tanah Burung
Pure Evil

Group E
Lemmitania
Svecia
Belmore Family
Giant Zucchini

Group F
Spaam
Ariddia
Europa Brittania
Nonexistantcitygrad

Group G
Halfassedstates
Squornshelous
Dennisov
Timway

Group H
Snub Nose 38
Dark Outcasts
Akbarland
Ravenspire

ANOTHER GORILLAFOOT ARRIVES

With the team in another dimension, football fans focussed their attention on the arrival of this year's Errinundrian exchange footballer, sasquatchd. Platforms anchored to the trees in the village of Findabaya were not big enough to accomodate all the people who wanted to watch the young prospect's first practice, so special platforms were suspended from hot-air balloons above the village. The exchange programme has already started to bear fruit: graduate codith made the Errinundera national squad and has shown promise, while Canabe Livit, who learned her skills in Ellery Camp, already has two goals for the Tanah Burung nationals.

"It's nice to be here, things are getting crazy back home, I'm glad to be able to focus on the game," sasquatchd said, after being mobbed by several hundred fans wanting to be photographed next to the young man from the country locals variously refer to as Pretty Gorillia, Big Long Foot Country, or Hairy Tree Wonderland.

Warung Agus, head of the village, had nothing but praise for the exchange programme, now entering its eighth year. But she was concerned about the news from Erriundera. "Just goes to show, never allow foreign investment," she said. "But, hey, I'm sure the Orangutans, sorry, Errinundrians, will weather this crisis with their usual style and grace."

I have to tell this.

I was looking at one of my maps of the real Errinundra (note correct spelling - d'oh!) to figure out where to put the new First Creek Falls football stadium. I was looking in the vicinity of the real First Creek Falls and found, to my amusement, that about 3 kms downstream was Hairy Man Creek. I kid you not. So now, in my NationStates Errinundera, the waterfall at one end of Downfall Stadium is - Hairy Man Falls.

Below are links to the inspirations for my Nationstate. All locations mentioned in my posts are either within these parks or quite close by. Of course, my descriptions bear little resemblance to the real thing. My trees, waterfalls etc are much larger than real life.

The real Errinundra National Park (http://www.parkweb.vic.gov.au/1park_display.cfm?park=104)
There is no mention of First Creek Falls here. Parks Victoria have a policy of keeping mum about it.

The real Snowy River National Park (http://www.parkweb.vic.gov.au/1park_display.cfm?park=186)
Includes a picture of the real McKillops Bridge - remote but not very graceful.

Group C
[3] Errinundera
[14] Lunatic Goofballs
[25] Bedistan
[33] Haraki

Previous encounters:
Errinundera 1 Bedistan 0 WC6 extra qualifying match

Mmm...

If we are good enough...

This is Errinundera's 3rd World Cup qualification in 3 attempts:
WC5 = 17
WC6 = 4
WC7 = ?

WC 7 Results:

Qualifiers

Q1: Europa Brittania 0 Errinundera 1 (antarcticad)
Player of the Tournament: snapier 3, regnanse 2, moschatuma 1
gk: regnanse

Q2: Sliponia 0 Errinundera 2 (longipesp, antarcticad)
PotT: adealbata 3, regnanse 2, horstrac 1
gk: regnanse

Q3: DePaul 2 Errinundera 0
PotT: horstrac 3, codith 2, snapier
gk: sedinburgh

Q4: Errinundera 2 Kaze Progressa 1 (antarcticad 2)
PotT: antarcticad 3, moschatuma 2, snapier 1
gk: regnanse

Q5: Errinundera 1 LordSquall 1 (longipesp)
PotT: adealbata 3, longipesp 2, codith 1
gk: regnanse

Q6: forfeited

Q7: LordSquall 1 Errinundera 3 (antarcticad 2, longipesp)
PotT: antarcticad 3, longipesp 2, moschatuma 1
gk: regnanse

Q8: Errinundera 5 DePaul 0 (antarcticad 3, nyleptha, sorais)
PotT: antarcticad 3, regnanse 2, snapier 1
gk: regnanse

Q9: Kaze Progressa 1 Errinundera 4 (adealbata, antarcticad, nylephtha, sorais)
PotT: adealbata 3, delegatensise 2, codith 1
gk: regnanse

Q10: Errinundera 1 Sliponia 0 (joyhilla)
PotT: scaroline 3, sedinburgh 2, longipesp 1
gk: sedinburgh

Goals
(Not including penalty shoot-outs)
antarcticad 10
longipesp 3
nyleptha 2
sorais 2
adealbata 1
joyhilla 1

Goalkeeping
(Goals conceded not including penalty shoot-outs)
regnanse 4 goal in 7 matches
sedinburgh 2 goals in 2 matches

leighm medal for player of the tournament
antarcticad 9
adealbata 9
regnanse 6
snapier 6
longipesp 5
codith 4
horstrac 4
moschatuma 3
scaroline 3
delegatensise 2
sedinburgh 2

Be lucky to make it off the bottom....



Group F
Spaam
Ariddia
Europa Brittania
Nonexistantcitygrad





What an awful group.....might as well go home now... :? :x

Personally, I like my group.... even with my crappy defense, I still have the best defense in the group! Pity about Ariddia's incredible attack :? However, hopefully the formula will be modified for the main round.

oh yeah, and Audioslavia are in group A, and Lemmitania are in group E. The hosts are always in seperate halves of the draw :)

The winner of A plays the runnerup of E. The winner of E plays the runnerup of A.

TnUIs Group.

Oglethorpia
Total n Utter Insanity 1 Oglethorpia 1 (Group 1, WC5)
Total n Utter Insanity 1 Oglethorpia 0 AET (Second Round, WC5)

One Red Dot
Total n Utter Insanity 2 One Red Dot 0 (Group H, WC5)

Busby
Never Played.