NationStates Jolt Archive

*starts pumping LP's heart. With each pump, more blood is forced out of the gaping mouth wound, causing LP to get worse*

Are you sure you still want CPR?
sheesh... I'll do it myself

*pulls his lower lip over his nose and gives self nose-to-mouth*

*gets blood in his nose*

*chokes*

Help!

sheesh... I'll do it myself

*pulls his lower lip over his nose and gives self nose-to-mouth*

*gets blood in his nose*

*chokes*

Help!
OK, I'll help you.

*takes out a soldering iron, proceeds to cauterise the mouth wound with no anaesthesia*

OK, I'll help you.

*takes out a soldering iron, proceeds to cauterise the mouth wound with no anaesthesia*
*tries to talk, but burns his lip*

AAAAAAH!

*kicks back Tribes*

THE OTHER SIDE YOU IDIOT!!

*tries to talk, but burns his lip*

AAAAAAH!

*kicks back Tribes*

THE OTHER SIDE YOU IDIOT!!
Sorry, I must have become confused. You talk out of that hole so I assumed it was your mouth.

*runs from the inevitable barrage of flak*

ooc: Actually, it's Dear Goddess, but you can call me Sweety. And if you'd know to TG me and be nice ;) ... if you are, i'll put you ba-a-ck.

ic:
*she hears Stag's comments and gets all flustered*
I have NO cheerleaders!!! I have teammates! People I expect to be devious and help me set up traps for Jocabia... And when I have my powers back (don't ask), you can have one wish. Or course, I can interprete it anyway i want, but hey, it's better than nothing. In the meantime, you get chocolate.
*wide smile*

OOC: It shall be sent! :D

IC:
Hmmmm.....the promise of one rule free wish.....a personal goal...and chocolaty goodness! I accept!
Oh, do we get dental? Cuas...with the chocolate thing...I'm gonna need it

Sorry, I must have become confused. You talk out of that hole so I assumed it was your mouth.

*runs from the inevitable barrage of flak*
Wait......so I have been..... flossing..... my...... :eek:

*runs for a shower where he curls up, feeling dirty*

Wait......so I have been..... flossing..... my...... :eek:

*runs for a shower where he curls up, feeling dirty*
What's more disturbing is that you have teeth down there to floss.

*cringes at the thought of 'chewing'*

What's more disturbing is that you have teeth down there to floss.

*cringes at the thought of 'chewing'*
And it came out through.....

*shakes heavily*

What's more disturbing is that you have teeth down there to floss.

*cringes at the thought of 'chewing'*

Ahhh! It's my medical school training all over again!

And it came out through.....

*shakes heavily*
I'm presenting you to the medical board.

No wait, I'll sell tickets to your freak show. I can make millions!! BWAH HA HA HA!!!

I'm presenting you to the medical board.

No wait, I'll sell tickets to your freak show. I can make millions!! BWAH HA HA HA!!!
I'm never eating again.

*doesn't want to be the freak with shit coming out of his mouth*

I'M NOT DUBYA DAMNIT!

I'm never eating again.

*doesn't want to be the freak with shit coming out of his mouth*

I'M NOT DUBYA DAMNIT!

Yep, plaque would be the LEAST of your worries

I'm never eating again.

*doesn't want to be the freak with shit coming out of his mouth*

I'M NOT DUBYA DAMNIT!
Hey, does this mean you drink with your...

Wow, inbuilt straw.

Yep, plaque would be the LEAST of your worries
You should see the dentists face

*snickers*

You should see the dentists face

*snickers*
If he looks like my dentist, I'd rather not.

*Mars*

*from the walls they hear the voice of Jocabia* This is the nastiest conversation ever!

OOC: It shall be sent! :D

IC:
Hmmmm.....the promise of one rule free wish.....a personal goal...and chocolaty goodness! I accept!
Oh, do we get dental? Cuas...with the chocolate thing...I'm gonna need it

ooc: you are making me work for nothing!!! you may not be in the same place as before but you are still there!!!

*goes back to her drink, muttering curses*

OOC: Hey TCG, are we it? You fell in something correct?

IC: Hello, TCG, looks like I missed everything!

OOC: I'm being screamed at to get off the puter!

IC: Stag, join TCG's team. We have a concrete penguin! And cocoaine!

*from the walls they hear the voice of Jocabia* This is the nastiest conversation ever!

It's been a while but i agree with him this time... *a nasty grin spreads across her face* although you guys can be so nasty, it's great. I've missed you!

*she throws Tootsie rolls and Aero chocolate bars*

OOC: been busy at work... so who's it

IC:
Mew?
[Cocaine... wuzzat?]

OOC: been busy at work... so who's it

IC:
Mew?
[Cocaine... wuzzat?]

Hey kitty! how was your nap?

and it's cocoaine, from cocoa beans and trees.

Hey kitty! how was your nap?

and it's cocoaine, from cocoa beans and trees. :confused: Merrrr? :confused:
[trees?]

:confused: Merrrr? :confused:
[trees?]

ooc: psst play along... and what are you waiting for to greet me with licks and purring?

ooc: Actually, it's Dear Goddess, but you can call me Sweety. And if you'd know to TG me and be nice ;) ... if you are, i'll put you ba-a-ck.

ic:
*she hears Stag's comments and gets all flustered*
I have NO cheerleaders!!! I have teammates! People I expect to be devious and help me set up traps for Jocabia... And when I have my powers back (don't ask), you can have one wish. Or course, I can interprete it anyway i want, but hey, it's better than nothing. In the meantime, you get chocolate.
*wide smile*

Why was I not told about this wish?

To Tribes: Why did you try to strangle me with a wire?

*from the walls* For those that join me, you won't have to coordinate every trap with 5000 people. Plus, a goddess flying through the air with skirt over her head... need I say more?

ooc: psst play along... and what are you waiting for to greet me with licks and purring?

Meorwr...
[being fair... letting others have a chance before I declare you off limits....]

MEW!
[OK, times up!]

*leaps into TCG's arms and suggles up under her chin.*
Prrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr :D

*from the walls* For those that join me, you won't have to coordinate every trap with 5000 people. Plus, a goddess flying through the air with skirt over her head... need I say more?

Tempting...but I'll stay with TCG.

Meorwr...
[being fair... letting others have a chance before I declare you off limits....]

MEW!
[OK, times up!]

*leaps into TCG's arms and suggles up under her chin.*
Prrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr :D

*she catches him and snuggles tightly, purring and licking his heading, meowing some choice words in a primitive form of cat-speak*
Oh my darling kitty, how have you been?

Sorry posted before reading the first post. so is there any posistion open?

ooc: take whatever you like my darling. i can always squeeze you in
*big smile*

;) but been busy and not really keeping up with Reject Royalty...

;) but been busy and not really keeping up with Reject Royalty...

Is that an invite for me to tell you more, or a fare thee well?

*she pets the Nekone and licks his face. she then looks up and smiles at JuNii*

ooc: take whatever you like my darling. i can always squeeze you in
*big smile*
hmmm. but what position...

Head Peasant?

Head cook?

Or do you have a couple that you can suggest ;)

hmmm. but what position...

Head Peasant?

Head cook?

Or do you have a couple that you can suggest ;)
*ponders*
Stay away from fire, and pointy things... and scrotums... and cinema and drugs.. and pain and suffering... we have a fluff... hmm...and a concrete penguin...

;) stones are still open...earth, water... any sin except murder and lust...

*ponders*
Stay away from fire, and pointy things... and scrotums... and cinema and drugs.. and pain and suffering... we have a fluff... hmm...and a concrete penguin...

;) stones are still open...earth, water... any sin except murder and lust...
kinda liked my character idea when I was in...

He, he, he... not everyone here knows about him do they...

Ok, head cook: able to whip up confectionary Ideas suitable for all tastes, human or otherwise.

do I go through an interview or something?

kinda liked my character idea when I was in...

He, he, he... not everyone here knows about him do they...

Ok, head cook: able to whip up confectionary Ideas suitable for all tastes, human or otherwise.

do I go through an interview or something?

Are you kidding? With you credentials? (and my past life experience ;) )
*she presents her hand, trying not to disturb the sleeping kitty in her arms*
I am The Chocolate Goddess. You can call me CG, TCG, Goddess, and i have a few more if those don't suit your needs. Better yet, find your own... And you are?

ooc: is that the title and description as you want it to appear?

Are you kidding? With you credentials? (and my past life experience ;) )
*she presents her hand, trying not to disturb the sleeping kitty in her arms*
I am The Chocolate Goddess. You can call me CG, TCG, Goddess, and i have a few more if those don't suit your needs. Better yet, find your own... And you are?

ooc: is that the title and description as you want it to appear?Junii, Ju if you preferre. *Bows and kisses hand.*

OOC: nah, I'll leave that up to you your Holiness. just leave my 'Secret' a secret.

Junii, Ju if you preferre. *Bows and kisses hand.*

OOC: nah, I'll leave that up to you your Holiness. just leave my 'Secret' a secret.

Ju, a pleasure to make your acquaintance. Say, do you happen to know how to make a Divine Kiss?


ooc: I would never divulge anything... it might cost you though :)

Ju, a pleasure to make your acquaintance. Say, do you happen to know how to make a Divine Kiss?


ooc: I would never divulge anything... it might cost you though :)Hmmm... I think I remember the recipe... kitchen's this way right?

*goes off and comes back with a glass of Divine Kiss*

OOC: name your price. Megami-sama.

Hmmm... I think I remember the recipe... kitchen's this way right?

*goes off and comes back with a glass of Divine Kiss*

OOC: name your price. Megami-sama.

*she takes the glass and sips*
Oh my yes... that's is as close as anybody has ever come...
*eyes fluttering*
When can you start?

ooc: what does Megami-sama mean? Besides, we should really bargain outside... like chat! Was my oh not so subtle message? or my charming post that told you?

*she takes the glass and sips*
Oh my yes... that's is as close as anybody has ever come...
*eyes fluttering*
When can you start?

ooc: what does Megami-sama mean? Besides, we should really bargain outside... like chat! Was my oh not so subtle message? or my charming post that told you?
OOC: Jyu_ni@hotmail.com
but my MSN messanger is down right now.

Megami-sama Japanese for Goddess.

IC: howabout tomorrow then. let me familiarize myself with the kitchen today and I'll start tomorrow.

OOC: Jyu_ni@hotmail.com
but my MSN messanger is down right now.

Megami-sama Japanese for Goddess.

IC: howabout tomorrow then. let me familiarize myself with the kitchen today and I'll start tomorrow.

ooc: i can't use MSN during the day but will find someway... and i should remember that word. I think you called me that before.. in PC...


ic: tomorrow, ok. that can be arranged. if you need anything, let me know and i will provide it for you. and what do you think will be your hours?

*whistling a little tune while rolling in a large covered trolley...* Ju looks around and hangs a sign. "Neutral Territory... Warning: don't piss off the cook."

then he sits down and waits for any hungry royalty.*

To Tribes: Why did you try to strangle me with a wire?
To answer the person with the ligature marks around their neck:

I dunno, I'm evil or something. I think it's a requirement for this place. In fact, I might go kick some kittens, just to show how filthy rotten I truly am.

*runs off into the sunset, waving his arms and cackling like a deranged hamster on methamphetamine*

*runs back, tired from his jog. So now, acting more like a psychotic hamster high on pot*

So, anyone really home, or am I just prattling on to an offline forumite?

*whistling a little tune while rolling in a large covered trolley...* Ju looks around and hangs a sign. "Neutral Territory... Warning: don't piss off the cook."

then he sits down and waits for any hungry royalty.*

*Mistress Hype comes in w/Master Sadisto barely restrained on a leash.* I need some food for Master S.! ASAP! *Whips Master S.* Don't you dare defy me or you'll regret it! *she says with a cruel grin. Master S. calms down* What do you have that can feed this guy?!

*Mistress Hype comes in w/Master Sadisto barely restrained on a leash.* I need some food for Master S.! ASAP! *Whips Master S.* Don't you dare defy me or you'll regret it! *she says with a cruel grin. Master S. calms down* What do you have that can feed this guy?!
*looks at Master S.* Alpo?

and what would the lovely Mistress desire to eat.

*looks at Master S.* Alpo?

and what would the lovely Mistress desire to eat.

I'd like a glass of Shiraz, and a peasant arm.... not too fatty though. For Master S. Just give him a few peasants. Maybe you can put new sauces on them! To have a chef that can cook a good peasant WITH a good sauce... that's what I've been looking forward to.

Good Job TCG, finding a chef!

I'd like a glass of Shiraz, and a peasant arm.... not too fatty though. For Master S. Just give him a few peasants. Maybe you can put new sauces on them! To have a chef that can cook a good peasant WITH a good sauce... that's what I've been looking forward to.

Good Job TCG, finding a chef!
For that I'll need to go to the kitchen... *hands Mistress Hype a glass of Shiraz.*

Be right back.

*30 minutes later comes back with Peasant arm lightly braised in a creamy clam sauce. and several deep fried Peasants for Master S.*

For that I'll need to go to the kitchen... *hands Mistress Hype a glass of Shiraz.*

Be right back.

*30 minutes later comes back with Peasant arm lightly braised in a creamy clam sauce. and several deep fried Peasants for Master S.*

Oh how lovely! We're not used to having sauces or anything but raw peasants! *she takes a bite* It's wonderful! *Anyone who looked at Master S. could tell that he was enjoying his meal, as he was ripping it apart and gulping it down, most sloppily*

My compliments to the chef Ju! Unfortunately, we do have to get back to the dungeon, but it's going to be great having some excellent food! If you want to borrow any of our dungeon items at any time, just ask. We owe you for that good meal! *Hype and Sadisto walk back down stairs on their way to the dungeon*

OOC: I gotta sign off... Ciao!

*walks in*

So... We're it?

*looks over at the remaining peasants, who are huddled miserably in a corner*

Hmm... There are fewer than last time.

*looks over at the cook*

Welcome! Please don't use up all our peasants too quickly...


(Hype's peasants' count: 8 remaining, including one with only one arm)

*she gets dressed in her mirrored room, looks at herself from all sides, sighs, straps her weapons on, grabs a backpack and goes out the door. she slowly makes her way downstairs with a secret smile on her face, humming softly while playing with her dagger hilt.*

*walks in*

So... We're it?

*looks over at the remaining peasants, who are huddled miserably in a corner*

Hmm... There are fewer than last time.

*looks over at the cook*

Welcome! Please don't use up all our peasants too quickly...


(Hype's peasants' count: 8 remaining, including one with only one arm)
No worries.. I use my own... after all, that's the only way to insure a healthy diet and quality meat.

*she gets dressed in her mirrored room, looks at herself from all sides, sighs, straps her weapons on, grabs a backpack and goes out the door. she slowly makes her way downstairs with a secret smile on her face, humming softly while playing with her dagger hilt.**sees TCG and prepares a glass of Divine Kiss*

oh and Ariddia, I claim neutrality... as cook, do you really want me setting traps?

*she gets dressed in her mirrored room, looks at herself from all sides, sighs, straps her weapons on, grabs a backpack and goes out the door. she slowly makes her way downstairs with a secret smile on her face, humming softly while playing with her dagger hilt.*

*hears a soft, musical humming, and smiles*

Goddess!

*walks over and licks her neck affectionately*


oh and Ariddia, I claim neutrality... as cook, do you really want me setting traps?


Depends against whom. ;)

*sees TCG and prepares a glass of Divine Kiss*

*she sees Ju and the glass. She smiles radiantly at him as she approaches the bar. she leans in and hugs him.*
I seem to remember a certain lady really liking to hug you for some reason. It just came as an impulse. I hope you don't think i am too forward.
*she sips from the glass and a slow sigh escapes her lips*

*hears a soft, musical humming, and smiles*

Goddess!

*walks over and licks her neck affectionately*



Depends against whom. ;)

My dear High Priest *she lightly caresses the side of his face*
Leave JuNii alone. There are a few who prefer to watch the show, as it were. No one must choose a side. The castle will demand a sacrifice from JuNii in due time.

My dear High Priest *she lightly caresses the side of his face*
Leave JuNii alone. There are a few who prefer to watch the show, as it were. No one must choose a side. The castle will demand a sacrifice from JuNii in due time.

Ah.

*he smiles, and his red eyes shine a little*

I will be interested to see what it is, when the time comes...

*he nibbles at her softly, then leans against the bar*

Are we it, then?

My dear High Priest *she lightly caresses the side of his face*
Leave JuNii alone. There are a few who prefer to watch the show, as it were. No one must choose a side. The castle will demand a sacrifice from JuNii in due time.*raises EyeBrow at the word Sacrifice but says nothing.*
actually, it more for fairness... After all, it's soo easy to lace certain foods and drinks with 'special' spices...

*raises EyeBrow at the word Sacrifice but says nothing.*
actually, it more for fairness... After all, it's soo easy to lace certain foods and drinks with 'special' spices...

*smiles*

I think our Goddess knows all about that...

*her eyes twinkle at the mention of special spice... she is reminded of special sauce, but says nothing, for fear of being pummeled by Celine Dion CDs*

This competition is a demand from the castle. It wants to survive and needs our blood, given in the spirit this castle was built for.

And yes, Aridd, we are it. and i have a plan. Simple but effective.

*her eyes twinkle at the mention of special spice... she is reminded of special sauce, but says nothing, for fear of being pummeled by Celine Dion CDs*

This competition is a demand from the castle. It wants to survive and needs our blood, given in the spirit this castle was built for.

And yes, Aridd, we are it. and i have a plan. Simple but effective.

Heh. Those are the best kind. Is it by any chance bloody, too?

*turns to JuNii*

Oh, could I have a peasant, please? I haven't eaten in a while, and I've never had cooked peasant with sauce. I usually eat mine raw.

Heh. Those are the best kind. Is it by any chance bloody, too?

*turns to JuNii*

Oh, could I have a peasant, please? I haven't eaten in a while, and I've never had cooked peasant with sauce. I usually eat mine raw.

@ JuNii
Could you whip something different for me? It's really unbecoming to develop a taste for the flock, as it were...

@Ariddia
Yes, it's bloody.

*comes back with a tray laden with Peasant under glass and a variety of dipping sauses.*

here you two go... I'll leave you two alone for the plotting.

@Ariddia
Yes, it's bloody.

Ooh!

*jumps up and down excitedly*

Oh, thanks, JuNii!

*dips the peasant's ear into some source, and offers it to the Goddess*

Are you sure you won't try some? By the way, what did you do with that live peasant girl I gave you a while back?

*comes back with a tray laden with Peasant under glass and a variety of dipping sauses.*

here you two go... I'll leave you two alone for the plotting.

*she turns away quickly from the platter and goes to the window for air. she breathes in slowly*

*her hand is slightly trembling as she sips from her glass*

Thanks all the same Ju, Arid. but I can't have that. Can you imagine being Goddess to beings you consider a good source or protein?

*she turns away quickly from the platter and goes to the window for air. she breathes in slowly*

*her hand is slightly trembling as she sips from her glass*

Thanks all the same Ju. but I can<t have that.

*withdraws his offer quickly*

I'm sorry... I'll eat it later.

*he walks over to his Goddess, and takes her hand gently to stop it from trembling*

I didn't mean to upset you...

should've guessed...

*gives her a bowl of Vanilla Float.*

I also have some roast and Lomi Salmon.

*withdraws his offer quickly*

I'm sorry... I'll eat it later.

*he walks over to his Goddess, and takes her hand gently to stop it from trembling*

I didn't mean to upset you...

*she smiles weakly, a little color returning to her face*
Please don't stop enjoying it on my account...

*there is a loud knock at the gate. her eyes widen in surprise and she rushes to the gate with her pack. she silently talks to the ACME delivery man, pays him off and walks off with him, heading to the back of the castle*

Well, since you're now busy anyway, I'll just eat up quickly and leave. I shall, of course, return in time to see the blood of Jocabia spilled upon the thirsty stones of this castle.

*bows, shimmers and vanishes*

*she smiles weakly, a little color returning to her face*
Please don't stop enjoying it on my account...

*there is a loud knock at the gate. her eyes widen in surprise and she rushes to the gate with her pack. she silently talks to the ACME delivery man, pays him off and walks off with him, heading to the back of the castle*
why do I sense a Wild E. Coyote moment coming up>

why do I sense a Wild E. Coyote moment coming up>

ooc :eek: Moi? *eyes fluttering*

ic: *she leads the ACME man behind the castle. there is a small path leading to a cliff. the bottom of the ravine is filled with vicious crocs. she has been importing crocodiles for a week, not feeding them at all. it will be a nice addition to the grounds, but before she makes it available to everyone, she has a plan.

she directs the ACME delivery guy to the big tree. incredibly enough, a baobab tree, she loves those. they look upside down. the guy opens the box, ties heavy chains around the anvil, then throws the chains over the biggest branch, a trucnk really.

tying the other end to his truck, he hoists the anvil a little off the ground, and using another chain as leverage, pulls it back. he gets out of the truck, secures the anvil, bows to TCG and leaves. she cuts branches to hide the anvil and chain. she then takes the wire that will release the mechanism and stretches it across the path. a few paces further, she peppers the path with heavy duty caltrops. if one thing does not get him surely the other will. and besides, she'll be watching...

smiling, she heads back to the castle to find Joc*

ooc :eek: Moi? *eyes fluttering*

ic: *she leads the ACME man behind the castle. there is a small path leading to a cliff. the bottom of the ravine is filled with vicious crocs. she has been importing crocodiles for a week, not feeding them at all. it will be a nice addition to the grounds, but before she makes it available to everyone, she has a plan.

she directs the ACME delivery guy to the big tree. incredibly enough, a baobab tree, she loves those. they look upside down. the guy opens the box, ties heavy chains around the anvil, then throws the chains over the biggest branch, a trucnk really.

tying the other end to his truck, he hoists the anvil a little off the ground, and using another chain as leverage, pulls it back. he gets out of the truck, secures the anvil, bows to TCG and leaves. she cuts branches to hide the anvil and chain. she then takes the wire that will release the mechanism and stretches it across the path. a few paces further, she peppers the path with heavy duty caltrops. if one thing does not get him surely the other will. and besides, she'll be watching...

smiling, she heads back to the castle to find Joc*

*Jocabia is running along and he kicks something in the sand and stumbles. As he falls he sees a caltrop and his foot catches a wire. He just has enough time to think, "Goddess, that thing is huge!" when a anvil swings past his head.*

That was improbable.

*Jocabia looks around and can't seem to figure exactly what was supposed to happen, but it doesn't seem to have worked out as planned. He feels a tickle on his foot and looks down and sees blood. He pulls his foot up and and is looking at his wound when he looses his balances and falls. On a bunch more caltrops.*

Ow, doggonit, Goddess. That really hurts.

*He grabs a stick and clears the ground around him. Then he rolls over and extracts the caltrops from his back and bum.*

*Jocabia is running along and he kicks something in the sand and stumbles. As he falls he sees a caltrop and his foot catches a wire. He just has enough time to think, "Goddess, that thing is huge!" when a anvil swings past his head.*

That was improbable.

*Jocabia looks around and can't seem to figure exactly what was supposed to happen, but it doesn't seem to have worked out as planned. He feels a tickle on his foot and looks down and sees blood. He pulls his foot up and and is looking at his wound when he looses his balances and falls. On a bunch more caltrops.*

Ow, doggonit, Goddess. That really hurts.

*He grabs a stick and clears the ground around him. Then he rolls over and extracts the caltrops from his back and bum.*

*she comes out of the bushes, her eyes narrowly staring at him and a bit of a tight smile*
well, that did not work out quite like i expected. But the castle demands blood and you are bleeding. Do you concede the tag?

*she comes out of the bushes, her eyes narrowly staring at him and a bit of a tight smile*
well, that did not work out quite like i expected. But the castle demands blood and you are bleeding. Do you concede the tag?

Traps don't have to fully work. Part of your trap worked. That's enough.

*He stands. After a moment, he notices the ravine and looks down into it.*

Crocodiles? Harsh. Geez, give a Goddess an enima and she's out to tear you limb from limb, literally.

*Hype comes up the stairs in a black gown with Master S. on a leash*

So what did I miss, who's it?!

Traps don't have to fully work. Part of your trap worked. That's enough.

*He stands. After a moment, he notices the ravine and looks down into it.*

Crocodiles? Harsh. Geez, give a Goddess an enima and she's out to tear you limb from limb, literally.

*she tries to suppress her laughter, but can't any longer. she bursts out laughing. she approaches her aching Champion and Frenchkisses him throughly*

I can't give you healing kisses, but i thought this one was long overdue. You're it, my Champion.

I see the word ACME down there. Please tell me it's not some sort of road runner trap! So who is it?

I see the word ACME down there. Please tell me it's not some sort of road runner trap! So who is it?
If I understand the rules... Jocabia is it.

If I understand the rules... Jocabia is it.

I wasn't here to see what happened.... Ju, can I have a glass of peasant blood please?

I wasn't here to see what happened.... Ju, can I have a glass of peasant blood please?
hmmm... any particual type?

If I understand the rules... Jocabia is it.

ooc: Yup Jocabia triggered the trap and fell partly victim to it. And he bled for the castle. Can't ask for more than that... *pouts* i still want to see someone squashed with my anvil and drop down the ravine to the crocodiles though... Any here know Asterix and Obelix? those cartoons they play at Christmas time are priceless...

hmmm... any particual type?

Whatever you feel to be the best vintage tonight. *winks @ Ju*

*He returns her kiss and feels himself melting.*

Yes, that was long overdue. Thank you.

Hey, what's up with the whole castle against Jocabia, by the way, Goddess?

EDIT - OOC: Apparently the bar is inside so I can't ask for a drink. Whoops. Note that you are not in the same place as us, Hype.

Whatever you feel to be the best vintage tonight. *winks @ Ju*hmmm... *Comes back with a glass... *
AB. young... male... all yours.

OOC: Sorry, doing this at work and had to give a user a crash corse in Lotus 1-2-3

No problem Ju... you're the only one who will acknowledge my presence anyway... And thank you for that. :)
OOC: I think it's because TCG and Jocabia are outside and we are inside the castle. thus they don't know you're here... yet... ;)

and if you're on Jocabia's team, then you're it.

*He returns her kiss and feels himself melting.*

Yes, that was long overdue. Thank you. Hey, Ju, you want to hook me up with a Guinness?

Hey, what's up with the whole castle against Jocabia, by the way, Goddess?

*she follows Jocabia and smiles at JuNii and Hype*
It's not my idea... I have no idea why nobody picks your team... must be my charm...
*she looks at him curiously*
Do you think i am campaigning behind your back?

*He returns her kiss and feels himself melting.*

Yes, that was long overdue. Thank you. Hey, Ju, you want to hook me up with a Guinness?

Hey, what's up with the whole castle against Jocabia, by the way, Goddess?
*Shouts down* comming down...

*A bottle of cold Guinness sails out of the window and down to Jocabia.*

:confused: ok confused i am... is TCG and Joc still outside?

*she follows Jocabia and smiles at JuNii and Hype*
It's not my idea... I have no idea why nobody picks your team... must be my charm...
*she looks at him curiously*
Do you think i am campaigning behind your back?

Uh, yeah... I heard your promise. Afraid of a little competition?

*Waves at Hype and Ju* What up, folks?

Guinness, please, Ju?

ooc: No Ju... it isn't... trust me. And I'm supposed to be on TCG's team but no one tells me anything that's going on.
Aw... :fluffle:

OOC: Sorry, folks, I screwed up. I thought the bar was outside.

IC: Thanks for the beer, Ju.

*Drinks*

so were's the.... err... doggie?

occ: *looks at everyone arguing... sighs, pulls out ICE CREAM GUN*

ok folks... CHILL!

*Sprays mint chocolate chip on everyone.*

I like mint Choc Chip!

*she goes to her bed chamber and gets the peasant girl Ariddia gave her a few months ago. she pulls her down the stairs and out the castle to the pathway. there she ties her up and sits her down, blindfolded. with unbelievable strength, she pulls the anvil, aims and releases. she scrambles to the edge to see the peasant fall to the bottom and watch the crocodiles feed*

I like mint Choc Chip!
I do too...untill those bits of chips run down into your... who's your father...

ooc: My apologies for my participation in ruining everyone's enjoyment of the game tonight. I will restrict my response to the game in the future.

ic: *she comes back from the cliff, scribbling on a piece of bark a few notes about angles and mass*

I'm glad you conceded the point Joc.. not sure it would have worked like i wanted...
*she sits on her tassled pillow pile and looks over her notes*

ooc: My apologies for my participation in ruining everyone's enjoyment of the game tonight. I will restrict my response to the game in the future.

ic: *she comes back from the cliff, scribbling on a piece of bark a few notes about angles and mass*

I'm glad you conceded the point Joc.. not sure it would have worked like i wanted...
*she sits on her tassled pillow pile and looks over her notes*

*Stretches* Whatever, it still sucked enough. I didn't concede. It was a trap and it went off at least partially and got me. There you go.

*Stretches* Whatever, it still sucked enough. I didn't concede. It was a trap and it went off at least partially and got me. There you go.

*she offers up a little impish smile*
Now this is a lot better than all the nasty things going on between us before... we work a lot better as a team...

OOC: Jocabia, Hype... can we drop this now... please?

*she offers up a little impish smile*
Now this is a lot better than all the nasty things going on between us before... we work a lot better as a team...
OOC: Don't do that. This isn't about you. I'm annoyed by the behavior.

IC: It's just a game, Goddess. I thought you were enjoying it. If you're not we can discontinue. Or I can play it with the others who seem to like it. You and I can go back to, um, 'other' things.

*she gets up and goes to the window, to make a few stetches of her guillotine, and comes back to sit on the pillows*

Now where is my bottle of Elixir? i need a stiff drink!

OOC: Don't do that. This isn't about you. I'm annoyed by the behavior.

IC: It's just a game, Goddess. I thought you were enjoying it. If you're not we can discontinue. Or I can play it with the others who seem to like it. You and I can go back to, um, 'other' things.


*she chuckles softly*
Well, maybe a little later. I have a few tricks up my sleeve yet.

*she chuckles softly*
Well, maybe a little later. I have a few tricks up my sleeve yet.

I'm very glad to hear that. I am enjoying the game *sweeps his hand* with your entire team. They seem to wait for you to decide on traps though. I don't know why. They also wait for you to spring the traps for the most part. I'm interested in watching what they come up with.

I'm very glad to hear that. I am enjoying the game *sweeps his hand* with your entire team. They seem to wait for you to decide on traps though. I don't know why. They also wait for you to spring the traps for the most part. I'm interested in watching what they come up with.

You and me both... there are rumours about concrete penguins and other things... we'll see.

You and me both... there are rumours about concrete penguins and other things... we'll see.

I still wouldn't mind, you know, like a couple of people on my team.

I still wouldn't mind, you know, like a couple of people on my team.

*she snickers*
What the hell do you want me to do? Order them? I am not their leader, or their figurehead. i am just a convenient way to tell teams apart... I don't go around recruiting you know...

*she snickers*
What the hell do you want me to do? Order them? I am not their leader, or their figurehead. i am just a convenient way to tell teams apart... I don't go around recruiting you know...

Well, what do you want? You walk around topless all the time. What did you expect? By the way, again, I saw your promise, so don't give me that recruiting crap.

OOC: So, what's the situation?

Well, what do you want? You walk around topless all the time. What did you expect? By the way, again, I saw your promise, so don't give me that recruiting crap.

I was merely telling him what was going on... not promising anything...
*she smiles radiantly at him, dimple and all*

OOC: Who's it and the rest of the questions

OOC: Who's it and the rest of the questions

Well hello Zat. Let me give you an update: Joc is now it. But we are friendly again *she winks naughtily at Joc*

Now, he has been complaining about lack of team mates, and although i would be terribly sad to see you go, if you reconsider your position, know that i would not hold it against you.

But, if you truly want to stay on my team *she smiles radiantly* it's time for some extra-curricular planning.

Well hello Zat. Let me give you an update: Joc is now it. But we are friendly again *she winks naughtily at Joc*

Now, he has been complaining about lack of team mates, and although i would be terribly sad to see you go, if you reconsider your position, know that i would not hold it against you.

But, if you truly want to stay on my team *she smiles radiantly* it's time for some extra-curricular planning.

OOC: So, what page is the trap on?

Now now now...

Both parties are right and both are wrong.

Hype: I know how much it sucks to be ignored. IC it could be because the characters are on a different location, but OOC people could at least have said hi. But again it's no reason for you to flip out. Especially after you got acknowledged. And you talk about not holding grudges yourself, but then you bring up some other time TCG and Peech got to you. Don't.

Goddess (and Joc, but mainly Goddess): if you are gonna respond to someone please do it with civility, instead of when she starts to attack you and then with equal force. You did not at first, which was good, but you clawed back pretty good. I know how you had some disagreements.... in the past. Let it go. It sucks to be ignored

Kudos to Ju who was the only one staying cool.

Now everyone kiss and make up. And no martyrdom!

Disclaimer: No offence to anyone. This is how I read it. If I'm terribly mistaken please tell me so


Now here's an idea for the Kazoo: let's make more teams, so every team can make their own traps. Maybe abolish the teams all together so we can all be free to do as we please again :D
The trap tag game is fun, but when there's a big team, people won't get all the input they want

Joc: ENOUGH! Remove your post

Asking LP to remove his post is wrong, because he DID hit the nail on the head. So don't ask him to remove it because it doesnt fit your personal picture. He read through the threads, let him say what he wants without your censorship.
Errr.... actually. I asked Joc to remove his

And lets just forget about it for once. Put ALL of EVERYTHING behind us and get back to the game!
And I hear this.

IC:
*finds some ACME box and builds a fort out of it*

*finds some ACME box and builds a fort out of it*


ooc: Thanks :) I have to go back to bed.

*yawns and strecthes* night all

ooc: Thanks :) I have to go back to bed.
OOC: Night Hype :fluffle:

IC: *throws cutlery to peasants from his fort*

*yawns and strecthes* night all
*accidentally plants a fork in Choq's belly button*

Whoops.

*hides*

*wakes up on his couch*
hallo...
ooc:
is anyon still here?!

OOC: Night Hype :fluffle:

IC: *throws cutlery to peasants from his fort*

OOC: Night... :fluffle:

IC: Here! have some Ginsu's to throw! :p

*shimmers back into existence*

Hmm... Next time you're all feeling tense, why don't you take it out on the peasants? That's what they're there for, isn't it? ;) As long as you don't use up too many... Our stocks are wearing thin.

OOC: Hype, that TG you sent me dosn't mention using the penguin. Had you got another idea with it?

*shimmers back into existence*

Hmm... Next time you're all feeling tense, why don't you take it out on the peasants? That's what they're there for, isn't it? ;) As long as you don't use up too many... Our stocks are wearing thin.

OOC: Hype, that TG you sent me dosn't mention using the penguin. Had you got another idea with it?
am i just a bystander?
...
...
oh well, as long as i can talk...

am i just a bystander?
...
...
oh well, as long as i can talk...

Hello! Whose side are you on, again?

*decides to test OP's reflexes*

*tosses his penguin at him*

Catch!

am i just a bystander?
...
...
oh well, as long as i can talk...


Hi Ariddia if you're still here! Oh, you know... whack people with it the penguin, bungee it back up when the rest of the plan is formulated ;) :D

Wheels out food cart... places "opened" sign out.

So, now we wait for Jocabia's trap.

Wheels out food cart... places "opened" sign out.

*walks up to cart* Sashimi???

*walks up to cart* Sashimi???*Places a plate of Sashimi and a variety of dipping sauses infront of Hype.*

Thank you! Wasabi and Ginger! *eats slowly*

Hey Hype... where Mr. S?

Master S. is mopping up a ton of blood. He got hungry again and made a pig of himself out of some peasants. He's lost his library priviliges again. errr... right... so remind me not to be alone with Master S...

errr... right... so remind me not to be alone with Master S...

If Master S. ever does anything without my permission, such as rape you or eat you, whatever. Tell him I told you to tell him I'll take away his library privleges if he doesn't stay in line. That always works. He's actually a genius IQ and has the hugest library on every subject you can imagine. And his worst punishment is loosing library privleges. *grins*

If Master S. ever does anything without my permission, such as rape you or eat you, whatever. Tell him I told you to tell him I'll take away his library privleges if he doesn't stay in line. That always works. He's actually a genius IQ and has the hugest library on every subject you can imagine. And his worst punishment is loosing library privleges. *grins*oh... nasty... ;)

oh... nasty... ;)

I keep him in line pretty well. *grins*

Master S. is mopping up a ton of blood. He got hungry again and made a pig of himself out of some peasants. He's lost his library priviliges again.


(Hype's peasants' count: 3 remaining) ;)

Arid :fluffle: I just noticed that you shimmer. *grins* Had no idea!

Arid :fluffle: I just noticed that you shimmer. *grins* Had no idea!

I can shimmer for you if you wish, Hype. ;)

*fluffles Hype hard*

:fluffle:

Hmm... We really are running out of peasants now.

*grabs a peasant girl and goes to hide her in his room*

There. At least there'll be one left.

(Hype's peasants' count: 3 remaining) ;)Sounds like a breeding program is in order...

I can shimmer for you if you wish, Hype. ;)

*fluffles Hype hard*

:fluffle:

Hmm... We really are running out of peasants now.

*grabs a peasant girl and goes to hide her in his room*

There. At least there'll be one left.

Yeah... I like shimmerring. *winks* We could round up some peasants today and stash them in my dungeon. I always have some up there, but I mean like, 50 or something. Especially if we're going to use the catapult. *grins* ;)

I can shimmer for you if you wish, Hype. ;)

*fluffles Hype hard*

:fluffle:

Hmm... We really are running out of peasants now.

*grabs a peasant girl and goes to hide her in his room*

There. At least there'll be one left.Psst... hype... need two to breed... one male and one female.

Sounds like a breeding program is in order...

With only three left, that would mean quite a lot of subsequent inbreeding...

Yeah... I like shimmerring. *winks* We could round up some peasants today and stash them in my dungeon. I always have some up there, but I mean like, 50 or something. Especially if we're going to use the catapult. *grins* ;)

Ooh! Yes, indeed! Let's go peasant-hunting, then!

*grins*

*shimmers for Hype*

It's easy enough for Master Sadisto and I to round them up. Me being BDSM Queen and Master S. being... Master S. ! Just whip them a couple of times and put them in this wagon with bars. *grins evilly* By the way, you fluffle quite well. *fluffles Ariddia hard and long :fluffle: )

It's easy enough for Master Sadisto and I to round them up. Me being BDSM Queen and Master S. being... Master S. ! Just whip them a couple of times and put them in this wagon with bars. *grins evilly* By the way, you fluffle quite well. *fluffles Ariddia hard and long :fluffle: )

Ooh... May I return the compliment?

*fluffles Hype to congratulate her on fluffling so well*

Well, while Joc is preparing his next trap, perhaps we could go peasant-hunting just for fun? *grabs his penguin*

Ooh... May I return the compliment?

*fluffles Hype to congratulate her on fluffling so well*

Well, while Joc is preparing his next trap, perhaps we could go peasant-hunting just for fun? *grabs his penguin*

Sounds great... Do we want to get a lot? Do we need the cart, or just leashes? *taps her 6" leather heel on the floor thinking*

Sounds great... Do we want to get a lot? Do we need the cart, or just leashes? *taps her 6" leather heel on the floor thinking*

Another 50, perhaps? We do seem to get through them fairly quickly... It's good to have quite a few in reserve.

*prepares some bentos for Ariddia and Hype.*

*prepares some bentos for Ariddia and Hype.*

I don't want to sound culinarily challanged, but what are bentos?

*looks around* Ariddia... Where aaarrree youuuuuuu? Do you know what bentos are?

*looks around* Ariddia... Where aaarrree youuuuuuu? Do you know what bentos are?

Erm... *looks ashamed* No.

OOC:
Hmm... If you Google it, the first image that comes up is this:

http://www.biologiamarina.com/bentos-alimentac.jpg

IC: I don't want to sound culinarily challanged, but what are bentos?

Bentos are box lunches. An entre' on a bed of rice with some tsukemono.

for instance Teriyaki Beef on rice with a small variety of Veggies/salad on the side.
http://www.shinkineya.com/sozai/bento-kurimesi.jpg
This shown is a Mixed rice dish with various veggies.

Bentos are box lunches. An entre' on a bed of rice with some tsukemono.

for instance Teriyaki Beef on rice with a small variety of Veggies/salad on the side.
http://www.shinkineya.com/sozai/bento-kurimesi.jpg

Ah... All right, thank you! You are indeed a knowledgeable cook. ;)

And yes, that'll be nice... We'll need to keep our strength up to go peasant-hunting!

WhenI first saw the picture, I thought they were bugs!

WhenI first saw the picture, I thought they were bugs!
*stops tying the second of 2 bentos...*
is that what you want?

oh and does Master S get one to?


OOC: removed all but the Ice Cream Gun... let em wonder about that. :D

Hmm... I don't know. Do you know a nice recipe for cooking bugs? ;)

Hmm... I don't know. Do you know a nice recipe for cooking bugs? ;)
hmmm... deep fried, Saute'd, boiled with other ingrediants, and some places eat em raw. Or chocolate covered.

OOC: never tried them except Cocolate covered ants. but seen them cook up grasshoppers and serve em like french fries.

Master S. is still eating a side of beef upstairs... *rolls eyes*

Well, throw us in a few bugs then, please... and shall we get going?

Master S. is still eating a side of beef upstairs... *rolls eyes*
So he needs the excercise.

Well, throw us in a few bugs then, please... and shall we get going?
I'll keep it seperate.
*gives a seperate box filled with assorted Instect Tempura and dipping sause*

I'll keep it seperate.
*gives a seperate box filled with assorted Instect Tempura and dipping sause*

Thanks! :)

*looks at Hype*

Well, I'm ready when you are...

I suppose. About how many do we want to collect? I need to know what to bring along. *evil grin* Besides Master S., I mean...

I suppose. About how many do we want to collect? I need to know what to bring along. *evil grin* Besides Master S., I mean...

About 50, I suggested, since we seem to be getting through them rather quickly...

OK, I'll have Master S. pull the cart. *Yells for Master S. Tells him to pull cart for peasants.*

So where should we start?

OK, I'll have Master S. pull the cart. *Yells for Master S. Tells him to pull cart for peasants.*

So where should we start?

I suppose they live in villages, no? We could raid a random village... That way, there's also the fun of smashing things, setting fire to houses, and so forth... *grins*

*excitedly!* "Oh that sounds fun! Can I use the penguin and bungee? I want to see how many I can knock out w/the penguin. I'll have Master S. catch the rebound when it comes back!"

*excitedly!* "Oh that sounds fun! Can I use the penguin and bungee? I want to see how many I can knock out w/the penguin. I'll have Master S. catch the rebound when it comes back!"

*laughs*

That sounds like fun indeed! Of course you can use the penguin.

*They leave the castle and start walking down a path toward a nearby village*

Now, remember, we want to catch a fair number *alive*...

*walks quietly in a very inappropriate outfit (think dominatrix)* There's one!!! *Throws the bungee w/some help from Master S.* Ewww.... that one is definitely not alive. *brains all over* This might be harder than I thought!

*walks quietly in a very inappropriate outfit (think dominatrix)* There's one!!! *Throws the bungee w/some help from Master S.* Ewww.... that one is definitely not alive. *brains all over* This might be harder than I thought!

*Obscene whistling*
Now thats a wardrobe :p

Hmm... Aim for... Well, no, actually, wherever you aim they'll end up damaged.

Well, you can have fun and crush a few, but don't use the penguin on all of them. ;)

*sees another trying to run away, and tosses a net*

There! That's one caught.

*throws him into the cart*

We're getting near the village...

*laughs*

That sounds like fun indeed! Of course you can use the penguin.

*They leave the castle and start walking down a path toward a nearby village*

Now, remember, we want to catch a fair number *alive*...

Are we talking....two arms, two legs kind of thing?

Are we talking....two arms, two legs kind of thing?

One head

Hey Stag! Joining the peasant hunt? I keep crushing their heads with the penguin, and then they aren't useful with our flaming catapult anymore. Besides, we need about 50, and I don't want them to start decomposing!

*Obscene whistling*
Now thats a wardrobe :p

Indeed. It's making it hard for me to hunt peasants without being distracted...

Then again, it'll probably make it hard for peasants to run away, too!

Oh, and yes, two arms and two legs would be ideal...

Hey Stag! Joining the peasant hunt? I keep crushing their heads with the penguin, and then they aren't useful with our flaming catapult anymore. Besides, we need about 50, and I don't want them to start decomposing!

Peasant hunt eh, get the big net! We eat tonight! AHAHAHA. Decomposition? No problem! Salt the beggars, with this uh- handily placed sack of salt that I have just noticed there. Look. There. Really. :D

Oh, and yes, two arms and two legs would be ideal...

Not even a little bit of decapitation?

Stag, you have yet to meet my slave, Master Sadisto (picture 6'6" 280 lbs of muscle, hood except for eyes and mout for now, wears leather and I usually have him on a leash.) "Stag, this is Master S., Master S., Stag." *Master S. looks Stag up and down and grins* So, 50 slaves, not dead... hmm...??? I'm having a creative block... Anyone else?

Stag, you have yet to meet my slave, Master Sadisto (picture 6'6" 280 lbs of muscle, hood except for eyes and mout for now, wears leather and I usually have him on a leash.) "Stag, this is Master S., Master S., Stag." *Master S. looks Stag up and down and grins* So, 50 slaves, not dead... hmm...??? I'm having a creative block... Anyone else?

Very nice, but do they have him in blonde? :D

Not too much decapitation...

Stag, you have yet to meet my slave, Master Sadisto (picture 6'6" 280 lbs of muscle, hood except for eyes and mout for now, wears leather and I usually have him on a leash.) "Stag, this is Master S., Master S., Stag." *Master S. looks Stag up and down and grins* So, 50 slaves, not dead... hmm...??? I'm having a creative block... Anyone else?

Nets? Handy things, those... And you can kill some, of course. As long as we end up with 50 live ones.

Excuse me for a second
*Walks behind house dragging a peasant*
*Comes back a minute later tossing aside the bloodless peasant*
Yuk, decafe
*spits*

*They walk into the village, and peasants start to run away, screaming in panic. A number of males, however, stand enthralled, gaping and staring at Hype.*

I'll get the running ones...

*throws a large net, trapping three peasants*

Excuse me for a second
*Walks behind house dragging a peasant*
*Comes back a minute later tossing aside the bloodless peasant*
Yuk, decafe
*spits*

Hehe... No problem, just add caffeine to them!

*They walk into the village, and peasants start to run away, screaming in panic. A number of males, however, stand enthralled, gaping and staring at Hype.*

I'll get the running ones...

*throws a large net, trapping three peasants*

*Kicks each and every one of the gaping ones in the groin*
I can't blame them, and yet it's just so easy.....

Excuse me for a second
*Walks behind house dragging a peasant*
*Comes back a minute later tossing aside the bloodless peasant*
Yuk, decafe
*spits*

"We need the blood Stag!" *she yells out to him while she throws 10 knives into ten peasants, runs up, chains them, and calls for Master S.* "Throw these in the wagon!!!" *laughs maniacally... * " THIS is fun!" * Mistress Hype goes about carving Hs in the foreheads of the peasants*

"We should all carve our initial into the forehead of the slaves we caught and then we can have a count at the end, and whoever has the most wins!"

"We need the blood Stag!" *she yells out to him while she throws 10 knives into ten peasants, runs up, chains them, and calls for Master S.* "Throw these in the wagon!!!" *laughs maniacally... * " THIS is fun!" * Mistress Hype goes about carving Hs in the foreheads of the peasants*

"We should all carve our initial into the forehead of the slaves we caught and then we can have a count at the end, and whoever has the most wins!"

*Eyes peasants*
*Eyes knife*
*Shivers*
Couldn't they just...raise hands?

Ooh! Good idea!

*trips up a peasant girl, then tries to carve an A into her forehead with his penguin*

*surveys the gory mess that was her head*

Uhm... Could I borrow a knife, please?

Aww, I gotta go. Seeya all tommorrow!
:WaveysmileyIinvented:

*Hands Ariddia one of her many knives* "Carve away! You'll need a knife too Stag. *hands Stag knife seeing he looks a bit skittish* "Awww... you'll get used to it. Will a fluffle make it easier? " :fluffle:

*Hype looks for the least bumpy roads. 6" heels were not made for this!*

*Hands Ariddia one of her many knives* "Carve away! You'll need a knife too Stag. *hands Stag knife seeing he looks a bit skittish* "Awww... you'll get used to it. Will a fluffle make it easier? " :fluffle:

*Hype looks for the least bumpy roads. 6" heels were not made for this!*

Yes, yes it would :D But I have to go anyway! :p

ooc: Ciao Stag :)

*shakes head* "Ariddia, you can't carve letters with a concrete penguin" *doubles over laughing*

OOC: Bye, Stag!

IC:
Thanks for the knife!

*grabs a passing peasant, carves in an 'A', and tosses him in with the rest*

*looks around*

Well, there seem to be quite a few here... You can play with the bungee, I think.

*shakes head* "Ariddia, you can't carve letters with a concrete penguin" *doubles over laughing*

Well, it was worth a try... Strangely, though, it didn't work. *laughs awkwardly*

Maybe I just need more practice...

"I can use the penguin with the catapult, but not if I have to throw it. I'll use the bungee cord." *Master S. just picking up two peasants at a time and locking them up* "The ones with no marking's are Sadisto's"


*Whips a bungee cord and hits a peasant in the eye* "Owww my eye."
yells the peasant".

"It's always funny 'till somebody loses an eye!" *evil laugh... Drags peasant to truck, carves H* "That was really funny!" *giggles*

Hehe... That's just cruel.

*takes his peasant a moment, to flatten a peasant's skull, just for the fun of it*

All these peasants! It's like being a kid in a candy shop.

Have we almost got 50?

"I would guess so. We should count who got the most." *lines them up shackled to each other so she can see their foreheads.*

*she goes to the store she secretly set up. she meets the old man again and nods. with his head, he indicates the tapestry. she looks around, but there are no clients. she pulls back the tapestry and pushes a brick; the wall opens and she steps through into an unlit room. she looks back at the old man. he hands her a candle and she steps inside.

the room is full of weapons and armor,. she inspects them all and nods in satisfaction. she comes back out again, blows the candle*

TCG: are your people ready, Vitto?
Vitto: y...y... yes, my lady.
TCG: *tries to keep her patience* their sacrifice will not be in vain. the Goddess will look after their families.

*Vitto bows clumsily. she looks at him intensely and curtly nods. she hands him her mirrored shield, scratched and dented*
In the meantime, have this repaired. i want it back in an hour.

*he looks at her wide eyed, bows and scurries off. she leaves the shop, goes to a small "pub" and orders a Guinness. she sits and waits, drinking*

"Well than I'll just start counting." *starts keeping track of numbers and letters*

"Well than I'll just start counting." *starts keeping track of numbers and letters*

*grabs a couple more, carves them, and tosses them in*

*goes to burn down a house*

"I think Master S. is winning!" *continues counting*

*sings badly* "Burning down the house!" Yells to Ariddia "I think Master S. won....yes he did". Shoves peasants into the cart. Master S. gets ready to pull.

"Enough you think Arid?"

*sings badly* "Burning down the house!" Yells to Ariddia "I think Master S. won....yes he did". Shoves peasants into the cart. Master S. gets ready to pull.

"Enough you think Arid?"

I think this should be fine! And I'm not surprised he won...

Let's bring them to the castle, then!


OOC: Going for now... Have fun! ;)

*watches the haul being brought in*

Impressive.

*she lost track of time, going over her notes. she angrily gets her things together and goes back to the shop. Vitto is there, smiling nervously as he hands her the mirrored shield. she inspects the work and nods in satisfaction.*
I see the extra time was put to good use...
*she hands him a few gold coins and heads off to the castle*

*she reaches the castle and goes to her room to put away her shield then comes back down to the main hall, and throws herself on the pile of tassled pillows, and just lounges, pondering her next steps*

*she gets dressed and leaves the castle discreetly. she walks for 2 hours along a stream until she reaches a clearing. there. she kneels and pray.*

*Jocabia enters a blacksmith shop with a look of detemination on his face. When he emerges he is wearing a chainmail shirt and leather greaves, skirt, boots, paldrons and bracers and steel gauntlets. In a leather sheath is an immense Damascus sword.*

Goddess, your champion has returned.

*He knows she hears.*

*Jocabia enters a blacksmith shop with a look of detemination on his face. When he emerges he is wearing a chainmail shirt and leather greaves, skirt, boots, paldrons and bracers and steel gauntlets. In a leather sheath is an immense Damascus sword.*

Goddess, your champion has returned.

*He knows she hears.*

* she settles back and waits. it takes but a few moments, but she hears soft feet. she turns and smiles mischeviously*

TCG: It's been a long time, Mercury.
Merc: Yes, it has my Sweet. I see you've been played.
TCG: *pouts* you know why you're here... When all this is over, there is a certain Norse God who's getting a visit...
Merc: *chuckles softly* You were never one to take a joke...
TCG: How about giving me that staff and those sandals, then we'll see how you feel. I want to have it back, but i don't want him to know its gone. Can you do it?

*Mercury looks at her with a pained expression*
Sorry, luv. You are very good, but even i could be you at times *she offers a impish grin as Mercury nods and flies away*

*she is walking back from her meeting, when she feels a familiar bond, and hears her Champion*
How can this be? My powers have not returned yet...
*Her eyes grow suddenly wide.*

* she settles back and waits. it takes but a few moments, but she hears soft feet. she turns and smiles mischeviously*

TCG: It's been a long time, Mercury.
Merc: Yes, it has my Sweet. I see you've been played.
TCG: *pouts* you know why you're here... When all this is over, there is a certain Norse God who's getting a visit...
Merc: *chuckles softly* You were never one to take a joke...
TCG: How about giving me that staff and those sandals, then we'll see how you feel. I want to have it back, but i don't want him to know its gone. Can you do it?

*Mercury looks at her with a pained expression*
Sorry, luv. You are very good, but even i could be you at times *she offers a impish grin as Mercury nods and flies away*

*she is walking back from her meeting, when she feels a familiar bond, and hears her Champion*
How can this be? My powers have not returned yet...
*Her eyes grow suddenly wide.*
*Jocabia is meeting with a few dozen men in garb similar to his own. After a couple of hours of explaining the plan to them, they headed to the castle.*

If you can't find friends in the castle, I guess I have to look elsewhere.

*Jocabia is meeting with a few dozen men in garb similar to his own. After a couple of hours of explaining the plan to them, they headed to the castle.*

If you can't find friends in the castle, I guess I have to look elsewhere.

*sitting in a nearby chair reading the newspaper*
Friends of yours Joc?

*sitting in a nearby chair reading the newspaper*
Friends of yours Joc?

*A large nordic man walks over to Zatarack.* Jocabia has many friends and many enemies. Where do you fall?

*The man remains close to Zat with arms folded.*

*she hastens her pace to reach the castle. it's been a long day and she is tired and sweaty. she needs a bath. she used to take baths for pleasure. now, it's because she must. how can they stand this? she picks up her pace.*

*A large nordic man walks over to Zatarack.* Jocabia has many friends and many enemies. Where do you fall?

*The man remains close to Zat with arms folded.*

*Jocabia walks over and places his hand on the chest of the large nordic man.*

Take it easy, Aitor, we're all friends here. When I asked for you help it was for a game. Nobody dies, got it?

Sven: Yes, Sire.
Jocabia: Sorry about that, Zat. How are you?

*she reaches the castle. she notices a group of quite large nordic men. she rushes past them, says a quick hello to Zat and stops in her tracks as she sees Joc, fully garbed in a gleaming suit of armor. her Champion. she blushes furisously and almost runs to the baths*

*Jocabia and friends moved around behind the castle and set to work. Soon they had cleared a large area and had moved literally tons of stones into the area. They were building something and it was going to be huge.*

*Jocabia walks over and places his hand on the chest of the large nordic man.*

Take it easy, Aitor, we're all friends here. When I asked for you help it was for a game. Nobody dies, got it?

Sven: Yes, Sire.
Jocabia: Sorry about that, Zat. How are you?

Alright

*she takes a quick shower and dresses in fresh clothes. her compsure seems to have returned. she snickers at herself. she was becoming more and more human. these... reactions were unusual. not unpleasant, except for the pain of course, but even that was... interesting. she shakes her head and looks at her mirrored shield. yes, that would be fitting, once this game was over. she turns, leaves the room and goes to the main hall.

she plops herself on her tassled pillow*

Hello Zat. Sorry for rushing a bit earlier. how have you been?

Alright.

So, what could Joc be building?

Alright.

So, what could Joc be building?

What else? another trap... *she chuckles despite herself*

What else? another trap... *she chuckles despite herself*

I know. The only other option is that he's putting on the world's burliest Shakesperean production.

But what is it exactly? I gues I'll just have to wait.

*Slowly a large castle takes shape. It appears for intents and purposes to look exactly like the castle currently occupied by TCG and Zat. As the castle is erected the group with Jocabia grows noticeably smaller until the castle is nearly complete and it is only Jocabia toiling away. So much for friends.*

So, that's the trap. Another Castle to reduce resale value. Quite a slow one.

OOC: Hey, guys, I have to run for a bit. Stay away from the new castle till I get back and then I'll explain.

*she goes to the window and her eyes widen*
What is he thinking?

*she says to Zat*
No, he loves this place. Something else is clearly going on... *under her breath* but what?

*she goes to the window and her eyes widen*
What is he thinking?

*she says to Zat*
No, he loves this place. Something else is clearly going on... *under her breath* but what?

If I had made it, it would be a mobile fortress of war. But that's me, not Jocabia.

If I had made it, it would be a mobile fortress of war. But that's me, not Jocabia.

*she turns to him with a slight smile*
Now, about traps...
*her smile grows wider*

Yes?

Yes?

*she continues to smile*
about that machine you were talking about earlier. have you thought as to how we cold use it here?

*Jocabia walks into the castle with one thought, it's time to explain.* Goddess, where are you?

*Jocabia walks into the castle with one thought, it's time to explain.* Goddess, where are you?

*she dresses in her ceremonial gown, which also includes a few well, placed daggerse, and heads to the main hall. she hears someone moving and Jocabia's voice.*
I am right here, my Champion. All you have to do is call.

*she dresses in her ceremonial gown, which also includes a few well, placed daggerse, and heads to the main hall. she hears someone moving and Jocabia's voice.*
I am right here, my Champion. All you have to do is call.

My Goddess, if you remember the purpose of the trap game was to save the castle. It was crumbling. So I built a new castle so the trap game would no longer be necessary. I don't know if you think it's a trap or anything, but I'd like you to come check it out.

I'll even let you tell me to go in first or to remain outside or stand whereever you wish while you look, in case you're worried I'm going to do something crazy.

My Goddess, if you remember the purpose of the trap game was to save the castle. It was crumbling. So I built a new castle so the trap game would no longer be necessary. I don't know if you think it's a trap or anything, but I'd like you to come check it out.

I'll even let you tell me to go in first or to remain outside or stand whereever you wish while you look, in case you're worried I'm going to do something crazy.

*she looks at him curiously and then nods*
Very well, Joc. Let's go visit that castle of yours...

*she looks at him curiously and then nods*
Very well, Joc. Let's go visit that castle of yours...

*Jocabia leads the Goddess to the new castle entrance and stretches out his hand* Would you like to go first or second? I'm just trying to make you feel comfortable.

*Jocabia leads the Goddess to the new castle entrance and stretches out his hand* Would you like to go first or second? I'm just trying to make you feel comfortable.

*she chuckles*
I'm sure you are.
*she takes his hand and walks through the castle gates*
So? where shall we visit first?

*she chuckles*
I'm sure you are.
*she takes his hand and walks through the castle gates*
So? where shall we visit first?

*He shows her to the great room. There is a pile of tassled pillows in the corner.* Uncanny, isn't it? What do you think?

*He shows her to the great room. There is a pile of tassled pillows in the corner.* Uncanny, isn't it? What do you think?

*she winks and smiles*
Have you made improvements, or is it an exact replica? Like... baths in the rooms?

*she winks and smiles*
Have you made improvements, or is it an exact replica? Like... baths in the rooms?

Oh, definitely improvements. For example... *He moves to one of the exits and whistles* Gentlemen, show her the improvements!! *In various parts of the castle large nordic men beginning tugging on thick ropes. A grinding noise can be heard suddenly all exits to the great room are sealed with Jocabia on the outside. Through the wall TCG hears, * Welcome to my latest trap! *Thunder can be heard in the castle.*

Oh, definitely improvements. For example... *He moves to one of the exits and whistles* Gentlemen, show her the improvements!! *In various parts of the castle large nordic men beginning tugging on thick ropes. A grinding noise can be heard suddenly all exits to the great room are sealed with Jocabia on the outside. Through the wall TCG hears, * Welcome to my latest trap! *Thunder can be heard in the castle.*

*she goes to the bar and mixes her drink. he wasn't kidding, this place really is an exact replica... even down to the Elixir bottle and her favorite glasses. Of course it was a trap. she knew and she came here anyway. will she ever learn? she pours and drinks her Divine Kiss in one shot. well that won't do it. she drinks a Guinness and whiskey chaser next. she belches... yes not very lady-like, and decides to inspect the place.*

*she goes to the bar and mixes her drink. he wasn't kidding, this place really is an exact replica... even down to the Elixir bottle and her favorite glasses. Of course it was a trap. she knew and she came here anyway. will she ever learn? she pours and drinks her Divine Kiss in one shot. well that won't do it. she drinks a Guinness and whiskey chaser next. she belches... yes not very lady-like, and decides to inspect the place.*

*Jocabia stands outside and his friends are really working now. The thunder grows louder and lightning shoots from the a castle spire and strikes down a tree.*

Enjoy my trap, my goddess. *He knows she hears* Here comes the second stage. *He winks though no one can see him*

*Jocabia stands outside and his friends are really working now. The thunder grows louder and lightning shoots from the a castle spire and strikes down a tree.*

Enjoy my trap, my goddess. *He knows she hears*

*she hears Joc's comments and laughs despite herself*
yeah, yeah, i'm it. don't hurt yourself too much patting yourself on the back... this is a clever trap, but i will find a way... especially if it's an exact replica.

*she hears Joc's comments and laughs despite herself*
yeah, yeah, i'm it. don't hurt yourself too much patting yourself on the back... this is a clever trap, but i will find a way... especially if it's an exact replica.

*The castle begins to collapse on itself.*

You're out of time, my Goddess.

*The castle begins to collapse on itself.*

You're out of time, my Goddess.

*she hears the stone begin to shift and a horrible groaning fills the castle*
Oh no... not buried again!
*she looks around in desperation and sees two small vials on the bar, vials she had not noticed before. "Drink me" one says. Oh no... Alice in Wonderland... she always hated that story, especially that creepy cat. she knows what she must do.

she looks around the base of the wall for a small crevice, anything she could wriggle through. after a few minutes, she finds one. she drinks the first vial and in an instant, is reduced to a thimble-sized goddess.. the humiliation is almost too much to bare. she starts for the hole but suddenly remembers the other vial. she turns and sees this huge, cracked glass tube. she tries to push and pull, to no avail. she punches at the glass to break it, but only hurts her fists.

time is almost up, the castle is almost on her head. furious, she heads for the crack and with greatl difficulty, manages to squeeze her miniscule frame through it. she sees the light at the end and, groaning, pushes on.

as she steps out the castle crumbles to dust.*

Now how the hell am i going to get out of this pickle?

*she hears the stone begin to shift and a horrible groaning fills the castle*
Oh no... not buried again!
*she looks around in desperation and sees two small vials on the bar, vials she had not noticed before. "Drink me" one says. Oh no... Alice in Wonderland... she always hated that story, especially that creepy cat. she knows what she must do.

she looks around the base of the wall for a small crevice, anything she could wriggle through. after a few minutes, she finds one. she drinks the first vial and in an instant, is reduced to a thimble-sized goddess.. the humiliation is almost too much to bare. she starts for the hole but suddenly remembers the other vial. she turns and sees this huge, cracked glass tube. she tries to push and pull, to no avail. she punches at the glass to break it, but only hurts her fists.

time is almost up, the castle is almost on her head. furious, she heads for the crack and with greatl difficulty, manages to squeeze her miniscule frame through it. she sees the light at the end and, groaning, pushes on.

as she steps out the castle crumbles to dust.*

Now how the hell am i going to get out of this pickle?

Just one more stage, my Goddess. It's going exactly as planned thus far. Doesn't it suck to be doing all this work only to sink deeper in my trap. *TCG feels the ground begin to move*

Just one more stage, my Goddess. It's going exactly as planned thus far. Doesn't it suck to be doing all this work only to sink deeper in my trap. *TCG feels the ground begin to move*

*she feels the ground shaking and groans*
Uh oh... this is not good.
*she nervously looks all the while trying to keep her balance. and then she sees. pigs. huge, dirty, smelley pigs, coming her way. couldn't it have been cows? it's worse than a stampede and they're coming at her. she takes a dagger in each hand and tries to time her actions. there is a piglet at the forefront. that his her target. much easier.

in the seconds it takes for her to plan her moves, the pigs are upon her. she runs and evades a leg and a hoof, gets knocked around and spinned. she can't reach her target and if she stays here, she'll die like a bug.

she starts cursing, loudly in every language she knows, and some she invents on the spot. huge balls of mud come out of nowhere to hit her but hit the pigs instead. the group is startled and disperses and she makes a run for it, heading for the castle wall.

just as she reaches the wall, a ball of mud hits her in the back and splatters her against the stonesl. she has enough strength to turn around and see a giant Joc approaching.*

You should at least get hit once for it, My Goddess.

*she falls to the ground exhausted, to the sound of his thunderous laughter*

*she feels the ground shaking and groans*
Uh oh... this is not good.
*she nervously looks all the while trying to keep her balance. and then she sees. pigs. huge, dirty, smelley pigs, coming her way. couldn't it have been cows? it's worse than a stampede and they're coming at her. she takes a dagger in each hand and tries to time her actions. there is a piglet at the forefront. that his her target. much easier.

in the seconds it takes for her to plan her moves, the pigs are upon her. she runs and evades a leg and a hoof, gets knocked around and spinned. she can't reach her target and if she stays here, she'll die like a bug.

she starts cursing, loudly in every language she knows, and some she invents on the spot. huge balls of mud come out of nowhere to hit her but hit the pigs instead. the group is startled and disperses and she makes a run for it, heading for the castle wall.

just as she reaches the wall, a ball of mud hits her in the back and splatters her against the stonesl. she has enough strength to turn around and see a giant Joc approaching.*

You should at least get hit once for it, My Goddess.

*she falls to the ground exhausted, to the sound of his thunderous laughter*

Look at the wall behind you... *TCG turns and sees* You're it.

*Jocabia takes a vial and pours out its contents on TCG. It washes away the mud and TCG begins to grow back to her normal size. He hands her a towel and sticks out his hand*

May I help you up?