NationStates Jolt Archive

The castle is starting to crumble. The number of castlemates wax and wane but this time, they don't seem to be coming back. There is a new game, now, a fight for the survival of the castle. And it needs you. Well, your blood actuallty. (for background info, please read the last pages of Rebels #9 (http://forums.jolt.co.uk/showthread.php?t=418703&page=86&pp=15)) and this for game rules (http://forums.jolt.co.uk/showpost.php?p=9032275&postcount=2))

Everybody has seen the awesomeness of this wildy popular thread.. rivalling all decency of the general forum. We are in the region of Riigor Mortiis, establishing a REJECT ROYALTY OF REBELS. Create your title, and state your duties. We will alter them to our tastes.

Post them in the thread, and make sure you telegram the thread's creator with them at their nation, because he/she may not see them in this looong thread. Let's figure out a way to overthrow all that is right, and normal with the world. Free sex, violence, fires and generally sickening chaos for all who join. not for the faint of heart.

If you tged us before, and arent on here, telgram the creator of the thread again, please. Have fun, and remember - don't try and behave. No one likes that.

Your name has disappeared? Well, membership has its privileges... and its price. Again, TG the creator so that we may come to a... mutually beneficial agreement... héhéhéhéhé <- *evil laugh, French style*.
EDIT: IT IS NOTHING PERSONAL, just trying to keep the list up to date with current Kazooers actually participating in the thread.

All praise our illustrious leader, Occidio Multus.

Tribes of Longton- Official Metal Head and Evil Bastard. nutting enemies into oblivion. moonlights as a masturbation ambassador. watch out when he starts banging that head of his....

Gaeltach-Countess of Mildly Irritating Pointy Objects. manages the inventory of Pointy Devices and other torturous Objects. fills requests for Materials or Advice. heads an R&D facility to increase the effectiveness of current Devices and to create new and exciting prospects.

Peechland-Warrior Maiden.Collector of Enemy Scrotums. need we say more?

Keruvalia Dark Lord of the Shadows. fronts the progressive rock band "Kings of Cunningulus". offers personal spiritual counseling and sexual manipulation.

DHomme Leering Lurker of the Unparralelled Social Circles- once he shakes your hand and says hello- he will make a lasting, permanent, painful impression. also the Master of Ceremonies at all events.

Planners Randy Da' Asspirate, 5 year delinquent old, kleptomaniac. steals everything that isnt nailed down, and nails everything he hasnt stolen to the wall. sneaks in your house at night and rearranges the furniture.

The odd one He who tends the Garden of Evil. hes got all kinds of plants- illegal, its rumored. he also makes the most lovely planters from the skulls of slayed peasants. or your mother- in - law, if you wish.

Legless Pirates High Whore LP of the Seven Seas - If you want him, come and claim him. wait. lay the claim first, then come. Master of male bonding and female bondage.he says he is a paramedic, but explain the tongue shoved down my throat during CPR.

Chocolate Goddess Mistress of (Self) Gratification and Sin, Expert Voyeur. has extensive toy collection, and a two way mirror in her chamber. also serves as 24 hour cocktail waitress, offering special treats, coated in her own secret sauce.

Monotonous Uber Pyromaniac, Flamethrower Artiste. creates masterpieces, then destroys them. sets random fires, and runs fireworks nightly. also breaks up the homoerotic action explosives when it threatens to get out of hand.

Divine Imaginary Fluff- The Most Divine Fluffalizer- (Re)Defining how holy everyone and everything is at his very whim. Spreading insanity, freakyness and fluffiness. Laughing insanely and generally being pretty damn insane. He quotes scriptures to castlemates just to see them cringe.

Mac the MAXIMUS- official fluid taster and castle bodyguard. He protects the women of the castle in case any giant peasants mutate and try to take them captive. Also official fluid taster, beer, mixed drink, suspicious vials and various body fluids. He can name your poison in 2 seconds flat.

Pablo the Squirrel- official nut taster.Drives a pink caddy and keeps dead hookers in his trunk.

Sir Jocabia, A spicy, spicy bit of Knightly Goodness - once took a spork to the midsection to seduce a goddess. He has a very big neck that we love to "nibble" on.

Choqulya : the Last Irish Prince and Consort to the Twin Regent Queens, Keeper of the Buttons HEADmaster...minister of cult worship and kingdom fashion police and Smiter of Peasants Holy Story Teller Extordinaire. enforcer of whimisical dress codes for all.... and smiting peasants with his big fashion stick

Nekone Offical Mascot and Prime Pussy(cat).This guy is no pushover. His venomous claws are no match for the average unsuspecting peasant. He likes to curl up beside youand make you purrrrrr...meoww. But Watch out if he offers you Catnip

Her Regal Randomness, Randomea. Mistress of all things dark and random

Zatarack King of Z cinema-Equipped with many Z cinema and and some good music references. A master of a never consistent array of hand-to-hand ranged combat styles. Prone to pointless blather and bizzare dancing virtuoso. A real lady killer with his patented double dip loop-de-loop hand stand. Has yet to find sanity...not that he wants it.

ryozerkia - Mage Mystic/Sharpshooter master of magicks and shooting pointy things... with a great big bow

Staggering Drunks Stag- Lord of....er.....this thing here!
Self-proclaimed non-vampire, really. Suitor to all things made of stone and aroused by snowglobes. Also once accused of sexual harrassment by sitting quietly in the next room. king of sarcastically witty remarks and self violence with a spoon

Opressive Pacifists - Zippo Master. As a young child, set fire to his aunt's hair. Since then, has never looked back. Mother always said never to play with fire. Official kindler.

'Skinny87 - Uber-Geek - A Geek with knowledge of many things including D&D - Will roll your dice and then 'Roll Your Dice'. Note to the wary: Beware of his loaded dice.

Branin -Owner of Mouth, User of Tongue. heckling and harrassing his way right into your soul. not really, because you dont have one. but we will pretend he got that far. honest opinions freely given, among other things which are rumored to be of a personal nature.

Hyperslackovicznia: Hype~ Princess of Pleasure, Pain and Punishment.inflicts a curious mixture of the 3 on anyone who crosses her path. Her slave, Master Sadisto is at her beck and call and can devour a human with one bite. takes requests, and fills orders.great work ethic.

Aurores Lunacy, The Wicked Script Keeper - pharmacist extraordinaire to the Rebels... hands out meds whether you like or not... beware both the red and blue pills...

Nureonia, Devourer of Toddlers - ensures that small children are in fact seen but not heard. Probably is capable of using that tongue for other things such as getting in between the cracks in shoes and putting out candles.

Aridd, Wielder of the Concrete Penguin. Neither quite dead nor quite alive, neither real nor unreal, you will find that his penguin is very real indeed when it smashes your skull to pulp.

JuNii, head cook: able to whip up confectionary delights suitable for all palates, human or otherwise. An artist at heart, he can carve with the precision of a true master.

OOC:

The game goes like this. You may join in or leave whenever you like. There are two teams - mine and TCG's (it doesn't mean we lead the team, it only means we are the only permanent members and we didn't want to make up lame names like Team Whip'n'chains and Team Discovery Channel). Anyone other than TCG and I can change teams whenever they like. You are not required to play, but if you do, make it clear that you've joined a team and which team it is (there is room for some espionage but try to make it possible to follow).

The game is basically tag. When someone from a team falls into a trap that team is tagged and is 'it'. It is then the job of the 'it' team to create a trap and wait for the other team to fall into it. General ettiquette applies, meaning you build a trap and set it, but leave it to the other team to decide who falls in it, if it springs or fails and what it does. If you like, for entertainment, you can make yourself fall into your own trap or can fall into a teammates trap. The game is pretty loose and is just meant to be entertaining. There are no winners.

*is now officially number 2 in this organisation*

Ah, it feels so much like 'The Prisoner'. When do we get a giant white inflatable to attack would-be escapees? :p

*is now officially number 2 in this organisation*

Ah, it feels so much like 'The Prisoner'. When do we get a giant white inflatable to attack would-be escapees? :p

Any time you want, dear. Just organize the trip. I'm in.

*with every shallow breath he takes, he inhales the powder she sprinkled, a form of cocoaine, a powerful drug.

he stops straining and slowly, one red pillow seems to grow and its tassles get longer... and longer... it advances on him with an omnious swishing sound*


*jocabia tries to clear his head but between the cocaine and the lack of air, he simply can't think clearly.*

*He watches in horror as the pillows move around to flip him over and the large red pillow begins to flog him mercilessly.*

Oh, you're so gonna pay for this one, my goddess.

*The red pillow continues the flogging.*

*Jocabia is too busy to notice that one of the doors to the room suddenly looks brand new. Apparently the game is working.*

*wanders in*


....


what?!

*jocabia tries to clear his head but between the cocaine and the lack of air, he simply can't think clearly.*

*He watches in horror as the pillows move around to flip him over and the large red pillow begins to flog him mercilessly.*

Oh, you're so gonna pay for this one, my goddess.

*The red pillow continues the flogging.*

*she chuckles and bends to lick his wound before they heal. Unfortunately, she also snifs a bit of cocoaine. she shakes her head and tries to expel the powder, but she can already feel it working. she groans*

Oh for the the love of the Goddess, this is not my day...

*she falls over on her side, and is suddenly fascinated by a few wandering ants. half crawling, half pulling herself, she starts to follow them.*

Any time you want, dear. Just organize the trip. I'm in.
We don't need a trip. I can order one in this 'ere catalogue.

Look, here's a good one (http://www.space.com/images/rotundus-rover.jpg), and here's one in action (http://www.virus.ldh.org/concours/prisoner/images/rover/etouff.jpg) :)

We don't need a trip. I can order one in this 'ere catalogue.

Look, here's a good one (http://www.space.com/images/rotundus-rover.jpg), and here's one in action (http://www.virus.ldh.org/concours/prisoner/images/rover/etouff.jpg) :)

*she absently nods to Tribes, not really understanding, too focused on the ants*

*she absently nods to Tribes, not really understanding, too focused on the ants*
*watching the goddess crawling on her knees, tribes is intrigued as to what she is doing. He wanders over and inadvertently crushes every last ant*

Watcha doin'?

...Can I set up a random trap? XD

Consider it done.

*begins working up an elaborate trap, involving a glass chamber, chloroform, and a dungeon. it also may involve cameras and the burning of clothing*

*watching the goddess crawling on her knees, tribes is intrigued as to what she is doing. He wanders over and inadvertently crushes every last ant*

Watcha doin'?

*her eyes grow wide at the sight of the big boots. she looks up the huge leg and up to the head... so far up there... she screams and tries to scramble away. she gets half up, but stumbles and hits the ground. she disappears, but her cry lingers...*

*her eyes grow wide at the sight of the big boots. she looks up the huge leg and up to the head... so far up there... she screams and tries to scramble away. she gets half up, but stumbles and hits the ground. she disappears, but her cry lingers...*
*looks around as CG disappears*

What the-

bloody voyeurs.

*sees a cloud of cocaine and pillows*

Dear Diary. Jackpot.

*puts shinies in the glass chamber and hums*

*there is a loud noise from the dungeon. there are heavy footsteps coming up the stairs, stumbling at times. the door opens and CG stands there, straw sticking out of her dishevelled hair, red eyes glowing, scraped knees bleeding profusely*

I never agreed to get so beaten up!

*she keels over*

*goes and stuffs his head into a pillow*

*straightens up, staggers under the effects of cocaine*

Must... continue... game...

*gets another peasant, and whacks him with his penguin, trying to propel him onto the sword*

*sends him slamming into Nureonia instead*

Oops! *chuckles; collapses* Missed...

ooc: for the record, it's COCOAINE, from cocoa beans and trees...

*now completely wired from the cocoaine, tribes forgets about setting traps. Instead, he has a lengthy conversation about cheese with a wall*

EDIT:ooc: for the record, it's COCOAINE, from cocoa beans and trees...
Yeah, but I have an eccentric reaction when subjected to cocoaine. Much the same as that when coke enters my lungs. Now where was I....

*continues conversation with wall*

*there is a loud noise from the dungeon. there are heavy footsteps coming up the stairs, stumbling at times. the door opens and CG stands there, straw sticking out of her dishevelled hair, red eyes glowing, scraped knees bleeding profusely*

I never agreed to get so beaten up!

*she keels over*

*Still drugged from the cocoa beans, he stumbles over and picks the straw out of her hair, very carefully, giggling and muttering to himself. At the same time, he begins to lick her wounds, his tongue missing the mark half the time.*

(Oh, and for the record:
Aridd, Wielder of the Concrete Penguin. Neither quite dead nor quite alive, neither real nor unreal, you will find that his penguin is very real indeed when it smashes your skull to pulp.)

*Still drugged from the cocoa beans, he stumbles over and picks the straw out of her hair, very carefully, giggling and muttering to himself. At the same time, he begins to lick her wounds, his tongue missing the mark half the time.*

(Oh, and for the record:
Aridd, Wielder of the Concrete Penguin. Neither quite dead nor quite alive, neither real nor unreal, you will find that his penguin is very real indeed when it smashes your skull to pulp.)
ooc: i thought that was a TG, officially, but for you, i will make an exception, since you are picking the straw out of my hair...

ooc: i thought that was a TG, officially, but for you, i will make an exception, since you are picking the straw out of my hair...

You are too kind!

*smiles, then spits out some of the grit he's been lapping along with the blood from her wounds, and goes back to picking and licking*

*she starts to snore a little, and every time Aridd touches her, she mumbles or giggles*

*she starts to snore a little, and every time Aridd touches her, she mumbles or giggles*

Ooh! This is fun!

*rubs a bit of cocoaine onto the tip of her nose, then licks it with the very tip of his tongue, giggling in a silly way all the while*

OOC: Didn't I read somewhere that it was Peech's b'day yesterday?
Also, has anyone spoken to Mac recently?

IC: *finally finishes his conversation with the wall after they have an argument over the soft cheeses. Tribes comes down from his reaction to CG cocoa and decides to work on a trap for...well, anyone*

I'm gonna catch 'em all....hee hee hee....*rocks back and forth as he works on this secretive project*

OOC: Didn't I read somewhere that it was Peech's b'day yesterday?
Also, has anyone spoken to Mac recently?

IC: *finally finishes his conversation with the wall after they have an argument over the soft cheeses. Tribes comes down from his reaction to CG cocoa and decides to work on a trap for...well, anyone*

I'm gonna catch 'em all....hee hee hee....*rocks back and forth as he works on this secretive project*

ooc:
Peech's bday was Sunday, dunno about Mac

Ooh! This is fun!

*rubs a bit of cocoaine onto the tip of her nose, then licks it with the very tip of his tongue, giggling in a silly way all the while*

*she suddenly takes in a big breath and quickly sits up, eyes wide open, then goes back down, hitting her head hard on the floor*

ooc:
Peech's bday was Sunday, dunno about Mac
Two reply to both of those facts - fuc-*gets repeatedly bitchslapped by a rotten haddock*

*she suddenly takes in a big breath and quickly sits up, eyes wide open, then goes back down, hitting her head hard on the floor*

*He pauses, then lifts her head up with some concern to make sure it's not cracked underneath.*

*Realising it's not, he chuckles, red eyes rolling around bizarelly in their sockets, and puts a pillow under the Goddess' head.*

*Then he starts again, putting cocoaine on her nose and licking it off, to see if the same thing happens.*

Bundle!

*jumps on Goddess and Ariddia*

Bundle!

*jumps on Goddess and Ariddia*
Pile-on!

*jumps on Goddess, Ariddia and LP*

Bundle!

*jumps on Goddess and Ariddia*

Yay!

*stuffs a cocoaine-laced pillow over LP's head*

And now sadly I must leave...

*positions himself to hold LP over the Goddess, then abruptly vanishes, so that LP falls down on top of the Goddess*

Yay!

*stuffs a cocoaine-laced pillow over LP's head*

And now sadly I must leave...

*positions himself to hold LP over the Goddess, then abruptly vanishes, so that LP falls down on top of the Goddess*
bundl......whoa.........Colours......and softness......and colours

bundl......whoa.........Colours......and softness......and colours

*she suddenly sits upright again, wild-eyed and looking around, she sees LP*

*she suddenly sits upright again, wild-eyed and looking around, she sees LP*
*drools on Goddess*
cowwours

*drools on Goddess*
cowwours

*she absently licks the drool and kisses him, while she sends out her senses throughout the castle. she can feel... something... pulsating... faint, but it's there. she smiles and kisses LP more thoroughly*

*she absently licks the drool and kisses him, while she sends out her senses throughout the castle. she can feel... something... pulsating... faint, but it's there. she smiles and kisses LP more thoroughly*
*zips up*

Hello goddess....How's your belly button?

*zips up*

Hello goddess....How's your belly button?
*she rubs it*
kind of sore, actually. what has been going on here...

*she rubs it*
kind of sore, actually. what has been going on here...
Nothing..........nothing I did anyway.

*hides hamster in his pocket*

*With Goddess out of commission the pillows eventually run out of steam and Jocabia manages to roll away and climbs out the window into the moat*

*The effects of the cocoaine makes him sink in the moat as he has forgotten how to swim. Fortunately a giant gator swallows him whole and then climbs out on the bank.*

*The gator would probably be wondering why his food tasted so foul but as he has a brain the size of Mac's he is not capable of thinking something so complicated. Similarly, soon thereafter he would be wondering why his food is cutting its way out. With his last breath, the Gator sees Jocabia sitting on the bank of the moat, smiling. Jocabia sees the gator sigh and then die just before Jocabia passes out from the exhuastive effot to escape TCG.*

*His dreams are filled with ideas of wonderful contraptions that trap Tribes and Arridia and TCG. The dreams out TCG traps contain traps that just happen to put TCG into positions that expose that which is rarely exposed*

*she arrives at the castle gates following her plant harvesting and sees the sign about the new Sacrificial Game being played. she stands there, lost in a daydream, thinking about running, and hiding, and spaghetti with special mushroom sauce... she smiles gently, lost in a memory...*

*she arrives at the castle gates following her plant harvesting and sees the sign about the new Sacrificial Game being played. she stands there, lost in a daydream, thinking about running, and hiding, and spaghetti with special mushroom sauce... she smiles gently, lost in a memory...*

Hello. Can I whack you with my penguin and propel you against a sword? *whispers* The walls need blood, you see...

*readies his penguin*

*<snip>

*His dreams are filled with ideas of wonderful contraptions that trap Tribes and Arridia and TCG. The dreams out TCG traps contain traps that just happen to put TCG into positions that expose that which is rarely exposed*

*she dreams and whether it is because of the cocoaine or lack of sleep, she unwittingly bumps into Joc on the Road of Dreams... she finds herself tormented by rather disturbing images and... compromising positions...

Asleep on top of her tassled pillow pile, she starts to fan herself...*

*she dreams and whether it is because of the cocoaine or lack of sleep, she unwittingly bumps into Joc on the Road of Dreams... she finds herself tormented by rather disturbing images and... compromising positions...

Asleep on top of her tassled pillow pile, she starts to fan herself...*

*Jocabia awakens and finds his head resting on a tassled pillow*

Thank you, my goddess, but you will still receive my revenge.

*Jocabia wanders the plains looking for tools to use to implement his newest trap for TCG*

Arridia, can I have a penguin? Master Sadisto and I want to figure out things to do with penguins. That's a new one for us. :D And when we're done we'll whack a peasant with it to bloody the walls.

Do you know penguin sex Hype?

Do you know penguin sex Hype?

I don't. I was thinking of it more in terms of a weapon or torture device...

I don't. I was thinking of it more in terms of a weapon or torture device...
*thinks furiously*


No nothing. :(

Arridia, can I have a penguin? Master Sadisto and I want to figure out things to do with penguins. That's a new one for us. :D And when we're done we'll whack a peasant with it to bloody the walls.

Well, I've only got one... but you can borrow it!

*tosses his concrete penguin for Hype to catch*

Oh, and we've still got most of your peasants left down here. 48, to be precise, though two of those are a little battered.

*she wakes from a long slumber and feels like she<s been hit by a Mack truck.*

Omg, i need a drink. This game was a great idea... if it doesn't kill me first!

*Jocabia awakens and finds his head resting on a tassled pillow*

Thank you, my goddess, but you will still receive my revenge.

*Jocabia wanders the plains looking for tools to use to implement his newest trap for TCG*

*she calls her favorite drink and ponders Joc's last words. she smiles a wicked smile*
Why does this seem personal for some reason?

*she lifts her glass to his spirit*
May the best Goddess win
*chuckles and sips her drink*

Well, I've only got one... but you can borrow it!

*tosses his concrete penguin for Hype to catch*

Oh, and we've still got most of your peasants left down here. 48, to be precise, though two of those are a little battered.

Oh! *snickers* I thought it was a REAL penguin! Well, so much for some of Master Sadisto's ideas... *laughs at Master S. and flails his back*

As usual, I threw in a royal with the peasants. A prince to be precise. Now you can play "Guess the Royal!" *sigh* I love that game. Hey, and before we leave... something we "borrowed" from the captured royal: 4 horses!

Drawing and quartering anyone??? ;)

Thanks for the penguin Ariddia! :fluffle:

Oh! *snickers* I thought it was a REAL penguin! Well, so much for some of Master Sadisto's ideas... *laughs at Master S. and flails his back*

As usual, I threw in a royal with the peasants. A prince to be precise. Now you can play "Guess the Royal!" *sigh* I love that game. Hey, and before we leave... something we "borrowed" from the captured royal: 4 horses!

Drawing and quartering anyone??? ;)

Thanks for the penguin Ariddia! :fluffle:
MEOW!
[Geronimo!]

*A small black kitten lands on Hype's head... nekone peeks down.*

Mew! :D
[Hello!]

MEOW!
[Geronimo!]

*A small black kitten lands on Hype's head... nekone peeks down.*

Mew! :D
[Hello!]

Oh hi Nekone! *pets Nekone* I'm just trying to decide what to do with a concrete penguin. hmmm....

*she gets up and walks around, evaluating the rooms for her next plan... and a special one for Jocabia. Of all of them , he deserves her special attention... he will know, he will know. she chuckles*

Oh hi Nekone! *pets Nekone* I'm just trying to decide what to do with a concrete penguin. hmmm....*bats at Penguin*

mew!
[Strange!]

Arridia lent it to me. I thought he was lending me a REAL penguin to whack at people! However, penguins are so cute I don't think I'd want to abuse a real one.

*she comes back into the main room with a smug smile on her face*
Why, hello Hype, Nekone...

Having fun with Aridd's penguins?

Arridia lent it to me. I thought he was lending me a REAL penguin to whack at people! However, penguins are so cute I don't think I'd want to abuse a real one.*looks at the statue*

Merrower...
[funny looking thing... short legs...]

Mew :D
[Hello TCG!]

*looks at the statue*

Merrower...
[funny looking thing... short legs...]

Mew :D
[Hello TCG!]

*she gives him a feline smile and pounces on him. shepets his fur and licks his head*
I've missed you kitty

Hello TCG. I was under the impression he was lending me a REAL penguin... So I'm not sure what I'm going to do with it. But I'm sure I'll think of something naughty. *smirks*

*she gives him a feline smile and pounces on him. shepets his fur and licks his head*
I've missed you kittyPrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr :D
[missed you guys too]

Well, it's back to the dungeon for Master S. and I.

OOC: obligations here

IC: If you draw and quarter anyone with the horses I left, let me know how it goes! Meanwhile, we have to figure out what to do with this concrete penguin. *Looks at it perplexed while descending stairs... yells up* Have fun kids! ;)

Hello TCG. I was under the impression he was lending me a REAL penguin... So I'm not sure what I'm going to do with it. But I'm sure I'll think of something naughty. *smirks*

*chuckles*
No, Aridd's been playing with concrete penguins... i think it's because they hurt more, but maybe not. He's very proficient with it but Goddess, he makes a mess of things though...

Prrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr :D
[missed you guys too]

Bye Hype

*she snuggles the kitty*
Waht have you been up to?

Bye Hype

*she snuggles the kitty*
Waht have you been up to?Meow
[Doing my job in keeping the mice outta the more polite areas of the castle.]

Well, it's back to the dungeon for Master S. and I.

OOC: obligations here

IC: If you draw and quarter anyone with the horses I left, let me know how it goes! Meanwhile, we have to figure out what to do with this concrete penguin. *Looks at it perplexed while descending stairs... yells up* Have fun kids! ;)
OOC: Bye Hype!

Meow
[Doing my job in keeping the mice outta the more polite areas of the castle.]
You know about this game we have on now? To save the castle?

You know about this game we have on now? To save the castle?
Mer... :(
[No...]

Mer... :(
[No...]
Read the first post, more specifically both links at the end of the first paragraph...

Hmmm... Now, how to play without my penguin?

*brightens*

I know! Why don't we construct a catapult? All we need is a very big, solid elastic, attach it to two horses, have them gallop suddenly in opposite directions, and it'll tighten, catapulting a peasant onto the sword!

*claps his hands excitedly*

Now... *looks around* Has anyone got an elastic?

*Jocabia long ago met a god that was involved in a huge war of the gods...

Loki: So many were killed in the upcoming battles, gods you've never heard of because they were around before the time of humans.
Jocabia: But how? Aren't gods immortal?
Loki: Gods are lots of things that would make battle difficult, but there is no trait, no ability that can't be lost, taken, altered with the right efforts. *grins*
Jocabia: Hmmm... I've been around the worlds and seen many things, but I've never heard of such a thing. I imagine there is much you could teach me.
Loki: Ah, how I've longed for a pupil. You might not guess it, but I am shunned by many god and goddesses. My sense of humor makes me a little prickly. Sometimes they even find my charisma annoying.
Jocabia: Well, then there is much I can teach you as well.
Loki: Then let us begin.

...

*Jocabia wandered the plain remembered his time with Loki and formulating a plan*

Hmmm... Now, how to play without my penguin?

*brightens*

I know! Why don't we construct a catapult? All we need is a very big, solid elastic, attach it to two horses, have them gallop suddenly in opposite directions, and it'll tighten, catapulting a peasant onto the sword!

*claps his hands excitedly*

Now... *looks around* Has anyone got an elastic?
LOL
Don't you people read? there are rules for this new game, you know. Speaking of which... where is Jocabia?

*she suddenly feels a little nervous twitch between her shoulder blades*

LOL
Don't you people read? there are rules for this new game, you know. Speaking of which... where is Jocabia?

*she suddenly feels a little nervous twitch between her shoulder blades*
Meerower?
[No sides? every person/cat for themselves?]

LOL
Don't you people read? there are rules for this new game, you know. Speaking of which... where is Jocabia?

*she suddenly feels a little nervous twitch between her shoulder blades*

*reads them*

*ponders*

So... The need to get blood into the walls... But, at the same time, the rules... Hmmm...

*brightens again, and begins to snicker in a disturbing fashion*

*goes just outside the room, taking two horses with him, and starts to build his elastic-and-horse catapult, angling it so that anyone who leaves the room will be flung back against the sword*

*snickers some more*

*waits*

Meerower?
[No sides? every person/cat for themselves?]

OOC: Actually, I didn't consider that. I think the idea of teams is very interesting? TCG?

OOC: Actually, I didn't consider that. I think the idea of teams is very interesting? TCG?
*Ebil cat-grin*

*Begins cleaning himself.*

Meerower?
[No sides? every person/cat for themselves?]
OOC Nekone, go unto Yahoo and IM me please. We need to talk.

OOC Nekone, go unto Yahoo and IM me please. We need to talk.nekone76

*Jocabia long ago met a god that was involved in a huge war of the gods...

Loki: So many were killed in the upcoming battles, gods you've never heard of because they were around before the time of humans.
Jocabia: But how? Aren't gods immortal?
Loki: Gods are lots of things that would make battle difficult, but there is no trait, no ability that can't be lost, taken, altered with the right efforts. *grins*
Jocabia: Hmmm... I've been around the worlds and seen many things, but I've never heard of such a thing. I imagine there is much you could teach me.
Loki: Ah, how I've longed for a pupil. You might not guess it, but I am shunned by many god and goddesses. My sense of humor makes me a little prickly. Sometimes they even find my charisma annoying.
Jocabia: Well, then there is much I can teach you as well.
Loki: Then let us begin.

...

*Jocabia wandered the plain remembered his time with Loki and formulating a plan*

*Jocabia continues to remember his past...

Loki: So I have to stop smiling like this *smirks* and more like this *grins*?
Jocabia: Yes, you can be an ass even a smartass as long as you're cute. *grins* Trust me, many of my adventures would have different endings if I hadn't learned to grin properly.
Loki: Ha! That would be a shame, because your stories are ridiculous. I will tell them long after your death.

... Jocabia continued his gadabout*

nekone76
*sigh*
i guess i will do it...

lol

*Jocabia continues to remember his past...

Loki: So I have to stop smiling like this *smirks* and more like this *grins*?
Jocabia: Yes, you can be an ass even a smartass as long as you're cute. *grins* Trust me, many of my adventures would have different endings if I hadn't learned to grin properly.
Loki: Ha! That would be a shame, because your stories are ridiculous. I will tell them long after your death.

... Jocabia continued his gadabout*

*Suddenly Jocabia gets a gleam in his eye at a particular memory and begins racing across the plain. He continues to get faster and faster until his is simply a blur.*

*reads them*

*ponders*

So... The need to get blood into the walls... But, at the same time, the rules... Hmmm...

*brightens again, and begins to snicker in a disturbing fashion*

*goes just outside the room, taking two horses with him, and starts to build his elastic-and-horse catapult, angling it so that anyone who leaves the room will be flung back against the sword*

*snickers some more*

*waits**Paws door open... Looks up as the Elastic snaps above his head...*

:confused:

*Paws door open... Looks up as the Elastic snaps above his head...*

:confused:

Damn you... Can you jump up next time you open the door?

Well, I have to go... Have fun! Be naughty!

*blinks out*

*Paws door open... Looks up as the Elastic snaps above his head...*

:confused:

*she follows Nekone and looks up at Aridd' contraption*
What the hell is he doing?

*she follows Nekone and looks up at Aridd' contraption*
What the hell is he doing?
:confused:

Mew
[who knows...]

Meow... ;)
[Well, I'm off to get some volunteers...]

:confused:

Mew
[who knows...]

Meow... ;)
[Well, I'm off to get some volunteers...]

*she ruffles the cat's fur and licks his head*
Come back soon, dear
*evil grin*

*As his goddess lounges on some pillows seeming quite pleased with herself, Jocabia appears near the window of the room*

Hello, my goddess.

*He races across the room and with a flick of his wrist a sphere of what appears to be concentrated white light appears. The room fills with the smell of chocolate.*

*TCG suddenly appears smaller, more fragile, but much more beautiful. Her hair is red and curly and a bit mussed. Her skin is suddenly pale and supple. A tear runs down her face as she realizes what has just happened, but she is too weak to move and do anything to stop Jocabia. She shields her eyes from the light.*

And now, you know what it's like to be mortal. Enjoy the game. I know I will, my lady.

*Jocabia disappears out the window followed by that which makes a deity. Outside he meets up with Loki.*

Jocabia: Thanks for letting me borrow this *hands something to Loki that cannot be seen but appears to contain the essense of TCG*
Loki: Goes do you want me to do with her.
Jocabia: I don't care. I was just trying to make the game fair. I always forget how much more beautiful goddesses are as mortals. I was stunned that I nearly forgot to run before she recovered.
Loki: Yes, our Chocolate Goddess has always been captivating. I'm not sure I would have wanted to run. Enjoy your game. I've got to go.
Jocabia: Thanks

*Loki disappears leaving Jocabia stading on the plain alone... and grinning*

Its the end of the world
:eek:

* <snip>
Jocabia: Thanks for letting me borrow this *hands something to Loki that cannot be seen but appears to contain the essense of TCG*
Loki: Goes do you want me to do with her.
Jocabia: I don't care. I was just trying to make the game fair. I always forget how much more beautiful goddesses are as mortals. I was stunned that I nearly forgot to run before she recovered.
Loki: Yes, our Chocolate Goddess has always been captivating. I'm not sure I would have wanted to run. Enjoy your game. I've got to go.
Jocabia: Thanks

*Loki disappears leaving Jocabia stading on the plain alone and grinning*

*she sits there, stunned, silent tears rolling down her cheeks. she looks down at herself, trying to feel her new body, the subtle differences... the vast emptiness. she gets up shakily and suddenly realizes she is naked, she blushes to the root of her hair and starts scrambling for a sheet or something to cover herself. then her eyes flash*
Jocabia! We will have words!

OOC: Everyone is encouraged to choose a side. Nekone I believe has sided with TCG. Here are the 'rules' - http://forums.jolt.co.uk/showpost.php?p=9032275&postcount=2

They are meant to be fairly loose and you may TG me or TCG if you have questions on what you can and can't do, but there is very little you can't do.

OOC: Everyone is encouraged to choose a side. Nekone I believe has sided with TCG. Here are the 'rules' - http://forums.jolt.co.uk/showpost.php?p=9032275&postcount=2

They are meant to be fairly loose and you may TG me or TCG if you have questions on what you can and can't do, but there is very little you can't do.

OOC: One question. If you fall in a trap, do you get out and start playing again? That's the impression I got.

Hi there Goddess..... you look different today...... new haircut?

*yawns and steps out of her suspended animation room*
Where was I? Or more importantly what was everyone else doing, and what are they doing now?

*yawns and steps out of her suspended animation room*
Where was I? Or more importantly what was everyone else doing, and what are they doing now?
Not stealing your wallet........

*Walks up from dungeon w/Master S.*

Good morning! Hey, does anyone know the answer to the question I asked below? About traps? If you get caught in one, do you just get out and start playing again?

*Walks up from dungeon w/Master S.*

Good morning! Hey, does anyone know the answer to the question I asked below? About traps? If you get caught in one, do you just get out and start playing again?
*shrugs*

Just play along I guess. I don't know really

*pisses on the rules*

*shrugs*

Just play along I guess. I don't know really

*pisses on the rules*

I haven't picked a team, but I thought catapulting peasants at the enemy would be fun! :D

*shrugs*

I assume so...

*goes to check that his elastic-and-horse catapult trap just outside the door is still there*

*shrugs*

I assume so...

*goes to check that his elastic-and-horse catapult trap just outside the door is still there*
*pushes Ariddia through the door*

Muahahahahaha!

Who is on which team? Is there a roster?

I haven't picked a team, but I thought catapulting peasants at the enemy would be fun! :D

Woo! We can team up, then!

*hands you a peasant*


*pushes Ariddia through the door*

Muahahahahaha!


*THWACK!*

*is catapulted onto the sword*

*shimmers as he hits it, and looks down to see a sword protruding from his chest*

Uh... oh.

Who is on which team? Is there a roster?
Ewww. Teams. I want anarchy!

*pisses some more on the rules*

*is dehydrated*

water....water.....

*licks blood from Ariddia*

*licks blood from Ariddia*

Uhm... I need that.

*pulls himself off the sword*

Here. You can lick it off the blade.

Uhm... I need that.

*pulls himself off the sword*

Here. You can lick it off the blade.


*hands Arridia his penguin* "You've got your weapon back!" ;)

Uhm... I need that.

*pulls himself off the sword*

Here. You can lick it off the blade.
:D

*licks off the blade and gets a shave at the same time*

Multitasking.... I love it

*hands Arridia his penguin* "You've got your weapon back!" ;)

Woo!

*hugs his penguin close, a tear in his eyes*

So... Were you able to think of something to do with it?

*swings his penguin, and brings it down with a thump on the skull of a random peasant, crushing his cranium down to the level of his knees*

*pats his penguin affectionately* It's working fine. :)


(Hype's peasants' count: 47 remaining)

:D

*licks off the blade and gets a shave at the same time*

Multitasking.... I love it

*pushes LP against the sword to shave his tongue off*

Woo!

*hugs his penguin close, a tear in his eyes*

So... Were you able to think of something to do with it?

*swings his penguin, and brings it down with a thump on the skull of a random peasant, crushing his cranium down to the level of his knees*

*pats his penguin affectionately* It's working fine. :)


(Hype's peasants' count: 47 remaining)

Whacked a few peasants with it! Let's catapult some peasants!!!!

*pushes LP against the sword to shave his tongue off*
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA AA

Whacked a few peasants with it! Let's catapult some peasants!!!!

*opens the door, and gracefully hands Hype a peasant*

You start. Have fun! :D

*opens the door, and gracefully hands Hype a peasant*

You start. Have fun! :D

*Puts bloody peasant into catapult (I flailed him a bit), lets catapult go*

Wow! Look at that guy fly!! I wonder where he'll land!?

*wonders what's going on*
*shrugs*
*notices LP's in pain so massages his tongue better with hers*

*grabs needle and thread and sows his tongue back on*


Retteb.......ftw?.......nmad.......gnorw yaw

*wonders what's going on*
*shrugs*
*notices LP's in pain so massages his tongue better with hers*
*slips in some massag oil*

Puh....pff...puh puh.


gnitsugsid

*Puts bloody peasant into catapult (I flailed him a bit), lets catapult go*

Wow! Look at that guy fly!! I wonder where he'll land!?

*watches the peasant sail through the air screaming, and crash into the wall, just next to the sword and LP*

Aww... Missed!

*has a sudden idea*

Ooh! Aim one at LP!

*slips in some massag oil*

Puh....pff...puh puh.


gnitsugsid

Now we're all going to have to learn sign language!

Watch out!!!!! *too late... catapulted peasant lands on LP and Randomea*

Sorry about that! We don't know how powerful this catapult is! First try... My bad!

*watches the peasant sail through the air screaming, and crash into the wall, just next to the sword and LP*

Aww... Missed!

*has a sudden idea*

Ooh! Aim one at LP!


Oh, so you had that planned! *winks*

Now we're all going to have to learn sign language!

Watch out!!!!! *too late... catapulted peasant lands on LP and Randomea*

Sorry about that! We don't know how powerful this catapult is! First try... My bad!

Yay!

*claps his hands* Bang on target!

*fetches another peasant to catapult at them*

Now we're all going to have to learn sign language!

Watch out!!!!! *too late... catapulted peasant lands on LP and Randomea*

Sorry about that! We don't know how powerful this catapult is! First try... My bad!
ho aemodnaR......uoy ekil ti hguor he?

*wonders what her finger is doing there*

Oh, so you had that planned! *winks*

Of course! *grins wickedly*


(Hype's peasants' count: 47 remaining, 43 undamaged)

Yay!

*claps his hands* Bang on target!

*fetches another peasant to catapult at them*

OOC: gotta go...

IC: Continue the peasant catapulting! If you need more peasants, ask Master S. I'll leave him here, and he can round up a lot in a short while, plus we have a secret stash in our dungeon.

*walks down stairs to dungeon* Have fun guys! Hope you can talk normally soon LP! :D

OOC: gotta go...

IC: Continue the peasant catapulting! If you need more peasants, ask Master S. I'll leave him here, and he can round up a lot in a short while, plus we have a secret stash in our dungeon.

*walks down stairs to dungeon* Have fun guys! Hope you can talk normally soon LP! :D
retal epyH

*waves from the tassle of Randomea, the peasant and himself*

OOC: gotta go...

IC: Continue the peasant catapulting! If you need more peasants, ask Master S. I'll leave him here, and he can round up a lot in a short while, plus we have a secret stash in our dungeon.

*walks down stairs to dungeon* Have fun guys! Hope you can talk normally soon LP! :D

Bye!

*waves, and catapults a peasant after you to say goodbye*

retal epyH

*waves from the tassle of Randomea, the peasant and himself*

*Grins at LP on the way down... then realizes... * SHIT! He's dyslexic now!!!! :eek:

*Grins at LP on the way down... then realizes... * SHIT! He's dyslexic now!!!! :eek:
I ma ton cixelssys.......cilect......ton taht yawyna

*door bell rings*

*opens*

"I have a singing Telegram from one.... Chocolaty Boddest?"
*coughs*
*she has been drinking all night, trying to forget her new mortality. But somehow, she is not getting drunk and that infuriates her. Of all the stupid resistance she had to keep… her skin is now pale, her hair flaming red, her body still flexible but… softer… and she is now wearing a long black satin skirt, slit on both sides, and a black long-sleeved fitted top. Black fits her mood well.

She gets up and goes to the dungeons. She has a plan.*


OOC: there are no fixed teams, except that Joc and I are on opposing sides. You can pick, change, spy, whatever… but you must trap a castlemate and make him/her bleed to heal the castle.

I will not be on today. I can't from work and I am busy tonight. See y'all tomorrow though…
*bows*
"Thank you have a nice day"

OOC: One question. If you fall in a trap, do you get out and start playing again? That's the impression I got.

OOC: It works like any practical joke we've done in Kazoo. You get hurt and you keep going. Sometimes you find interesting ways to heal yourself (though not with the goddess's tongue anymore).

*As his goddess lounges on some pillows seeming quite pleased with herself, Jocabia appears near the window of the room*

Hello, my goddess.

*He races across the room and with a flick of his wrist a sphere of what appears to be concentrated white light appears. The room fills with the smell of chocolate.*

*TCG suddenly appears smaller, more fragile, but much more beautiful. Her hair is red and curly and a bit mussed. Her skin is suddenly pale and supple. A tear runs down her face as she realizes what has just happened, but she is too weak to move and do anything to stop Jocabia. She shields her eyes from the light.*

And now, you know what it's like to be mortal. Enjoy the game. I know I will, my lady.

*Jocabia disappears out the window followed by that which makes a deity. Outside he meets up with Loki.*

Jocabia: Thanks for letting me borrow this *hands something to Loki that cannot be seen but appears to contain the essense of TCG*
Loki: Goes do you want me to do with her.
Jocabia: I don't care. I was just trying to make the game fair. I always forget how much more beautiful goddesses are as mortals. I was stunned that I nearly forgot to run before she recovered.
Loki: Yes, our Chocolate Goddess has always been captivating. I'm not sure I would have wanted to run. Enjoy your game. I've got to go.
Jocabia: Thanks

*Loki disappears leaving Jocabia stading on the plain alone... and grinning*

*Jocabia takes a break from his satisfaction with himself to realize it's his turn to trap TCG or her team. He scratches his head for a bit and again is sent into revelry... a long time ago...

*Jocabia races through legions of troops slaying dozens of his opponents at a swing of his sword when he stops dead in his tracks. Soldiers who were chasing him slam into his back. He brushes them away with a swing of his sword, but his gaze never leaves the black giant before him.*

*Standing in the middle of circle of Jocabia's legions, the ground thick with blood, is a man easily two feet taller than Jocabia and over a hundred pounds heavier. His armor is entirely black and not one bit of skin can be seen through it. It is almost as if there is a hole in space where the man stands. Every time one of Jocabia's soldiers moves within range he turns them into a blood vapor with an immense flail. His movements are fluid and his reactions are almost instantaneous. Jocabia can't help but be impressed.*

Jocabia: I believe you're looking for me.
Black Giant: Ah, Jocabia *the giant's voice was so low and loud that Jocabia's insides vibrated* I have oft heard a bard's song or two about you. You have earned yourself quite the reputation among myth and mortal alike.
Jocabia: Interesting. I've never heard of you, ever. If you seek to earn a reputation on the likes of me, know, no one will tell this story of you either. I suppose you are the one responsible for the attacks on these poor people. Was it just to lure me in?
BG: You give yourself too much credit. I didn't come here for you. I came here for the sport of wiping out a planet. You're right you'll never here my name in song because no one ever lives to sing about my... hmmm... adventures, shall we say. You are only famous because you are inefficient.
Jocabia: Tell it to the end of my sword. *It is then that Jocabia notices that they sound like a bad comic book*

*The two men slammed into one another with a thunder that left all who looked on temporarily deaf. Like watching television with the sound turned down, they watched as the two beasts danced and swayed about each other neither landing a solid blow for nigh on five minutes. Suddenly, Jocabia seemed to slip and the Black Giant landed a blow square to the midsection of Jocabia. Jocabia rolled across the plain and came to a stop a full mile away. Blood oozed from his belly and he laid completely still while he tried to find his breath. Slowly, Jocabia came to his feet, set in the realization that he would not likely defeat this giant. He drooped his head and moved away slowly*

...

*Jocabia was brought out of his memories when he stumbled into an ice cold stream. He submerged himself to ease the blazing heat of the noon sun.*

*Jocabia takes a break from his satisfaction with himself to realize it's his turn to trap TCG or her team. He scratches his head for a bit and again is sent into revelry... a long time ago...

*Jocabia races through legions of troops slaying dozens of his opponents at a swing of his sword when he stops dead in his tracks. Soldiers who were chasing him slam into his back. He brushes them away with a swing of his sword, but his gaze never leaves the black giant before him.*

*Standing in the middle of circle of Jocabia's legions, the ground thick with blood, is a man easily two feet taller than Jocabia and over a hundred pounds heavier. His armor is entirely black and not one bit of skin can be seen through it. It is almost as if there is a hole in space where the man stands. Every time one of Jocabia's soldiers moves within range he turns them into a blood vapor with an immense flail. His movements are fluid and his reactions are almost instantaneous. Jocabia can't help but be impressed.*

Jocabia: I believe you're looking for me.
Black Giant: Ah, Jocabia *the giant's voice was so low and loud that Jocabia's insides vibrated* I have oft heard a bard's song or two about you. You have earned yourself quite the reputation among myth and mortal alike.
Jocabia: Interesting. I've never heard of you, ever. If you seek to earn a reputation on the likes of me, know, no one will tell this story of you either. I suppose you are the one responsible for the attacks on these poor people. Was it just to lure me in?
BG: You give yourself too much credit. I didn't come here for you. I came here for the sport of wiping out a planet. You're right you'll never here my name in song because no one ever lives to sing about my... hmmm... adventures, shall we say. You are only famous because you are inefficient.
Jocabia: Tell it to the end of my sword. *It is then that Jocabia notices that they sound like a bad comic book*

*The two men slammed into one another with a thunder that left all who looked on temporarily deaf. Like watching television with the sound turned down, they watched as the two beasts danced and swayed about each other neither landing a solid blow for nigh on five minutes. Suddenly, Jocabia seemed to slip and the Black Giant landed a blow square to the midsection of Jocabia. Jocabia rolled across the plain and came to a stop a full mile away. Blood oozed from his belly and he laid completely still while he tried to find his breath. Slowly, Jocabia came to his feet, set in the realization that he would not likely defeat this giant. He drooped his head and moved away slowly*

...

*Jocabia was brought out of his memories when he stumbled into an ice cold stream. He submerged himself to ease the blazing heat of the noon sun.*

*Lounging in the cold stream, Jocabia once again slips into mental scrap books...

*Jocabia looks on as the Black Giant flails away in the trap that had been set for him. BG quickly tires himself out and Jocabia walks slowly up.*

Jocabia: And no one will tell this story either.

*Jocabia's blade disappeared in the void that was the Black Giant and a deafening sigh escaped his black lips. To Jocabia it seemed as if he could hear the cheers of those who'd been slaughtered in the giant's wake. Jocabia withdrew his blade, cleaned it on his tunic and replaced it in its sheath.*

...

*Jocabia grinned*

That is exactly what I must do.

*Jocabia began following the stream to its source.*

*up in the rafters, nekone surveys the room... *

Good!... empty!


Meerrrroooowwrrr! :D
[as we agreed... you know what to do...]

*Now that he had all the parts to his trap. Jocabia began to prepare his trap with painstaking precision. First he coated the ground outside a particular window of the castle with motor oil. He grooved the area so that it slanted and fed anything sliding along it into one specific area. In that area he placed a finely crafted giant wooden spoon pulled back and locked into place with a bunch of force created by a rubber band attempting to spring it forward. Next he placed a giant spider's web in front of the spoon.*

*Jocabia surveyed his work and it was good. He smiled.*

Now, I'll just place the mountain goat in the main room of the castle and wait.

*Jocabia quickly moved upstairs and placed the goat in the main room and hid in the corner to watch.*

*Jocabia quickly moved upstairs and placed the goat in the main room and hid in the corner to watch.**Squeek!*

*Nekone watched Jocabia position the goat in the main room...*

:confused:

*Nekone leaps down and goes to investigate the goat.*

*works out that helping LP must have pitted her against Hype.*
Oh well.
*decides staying where she is will let her work out more of what's going on*
Wait a second...The Choccy's mortal???

*Mistress Hype and Master Sadisto crept quietly up to the top of the castle, dragging several peasants... They begin catapulting them randomly everywhere*

Woohoo!!!!! We haven't picked a team yet, so let the peasants fly!!! *splat*

*Hype and Master S. turn to a smaller catapult they made and start chucking peasants down the castle stairs... * splat... splat..*

I never get sick of that sound! Hope I hit someone! Or something!

*Squeek!*

*Nekone watched Jocabia position the goat in the main room...*

:confused:

*Nekone leaps down and goes to investigate the goat.*

*The mountain goat charges forward towards Nekone and lowers its head.*

*Jocabia suppresses a giggle*

*Nearing the goat... a screaming pheasant distracts Nekone and he looks out the window... *

I didn't know pesants could fly??? or was that phesants....

OOC:Hype, Randomea...who's team are you on?

OOC: go ahead Joc... I don't know what this contraption will do so... :D

*Nearing the goat... a screaming pheasant distracts Nekone and he looks out the window... *

I didn't know pesants could fly??? or was that phesants....

OOC:Hype, Randomea...who's team are you on?

*The goat connects with Nekone hitting him so hard that he flies out the window leaving his pelt behind. A naked Nekone falls toward the oil-covered ground*

*works out that helping LP must have pitted her against Hype.*
Oh well.
*decides staying where she is will let her work out more of what's going on*
Wait a second...The Choccy's mortal???


I'm not against LP! Or you! I didn't cut his tongue out!!! Joc did! I just noticed that he was dyslexic, is all... And Arriddia is the one who nailed you with the peasant!

So... blame the penguin man!

*The goat connects with Nekone hitting him so hard that he flies out the window leaving his pelt behind. A naked Nekone falls toward the oil-covered ground* :eek: MMMMMEEEEEEEeeeeeeeeeeooooooooowwwwwww!

(Method 1: slammed out of pelt by goat.)

I'm not against LP! Or you! I didn't cut his tongue out!!! Joc did! I just noticed that he was dyslexic, is all... And Arriddia is the one who nailed you with the peasant!

So... blame the penguin man!

*Jocabia completely forgets to watch his trap work and leans out the window*

That's crap. I didn't cut off anyone's tongue. I never touched LP. Well, there was that one time when there were no women in the castle and I was lonely... I mean, I NEVER touched LP!

*Nearing the goat... a screaming pheasant distracts Nekone and he looks out the window... *

I didn't know pesants could fly??? or was that phesants....

OOC:Hype, Randomea...who's team are you on?

OOC: go ahead Joc... I don't know what this contraption will do so... :D

OOC: I haven't picked a team... Who is on what team?

IC: We're just flinging peasants randomly for fun!

*Jocabia completely forgets to watch his trap work and leans out the window*

That's crap. I didn't cut off anyone's tongue. I never touched LP. Well, there was that one time when there were no women in the castle and I was lonely... I mean, I NEVER touched LP!

Someone cut his tongue off when he was shaving... Wait... maybe he did it himself?!

:eek: MMMMMEEEEEEEeeeeeeeeeeooooooooowwwwwww!

(Method 1: slammed out of pelt by goat.)

Nekone is nekked! *gets binoculars since I'm still at the top of the castle* Woohooo!!!!... Yes, Master S., you can look too, but you can't touch unless I say so.

:eek: MMMMMEEEEEEEeeeeeeeeeeooooooooowwwwwww!

OOC: Technically, I'm not supposed to decide how it works on you, or in fact, who it works on. I'll do it this time. But part of the funny is see what how your mind will make the trap I set up work. If you need an example see the trap I set for TCG at the end of the last thread.

IC:

*Nekone hits the ground and tries to claw at it to keep from slidding and spinning into Jocabia's trap. Nekone slides into a small stick that appears to be holding a large spoon back that hits him in the tail end with a large smack sending him flying into the large spider web. Nekone is naked spread-eagle and stuck to a web.*

*Jocabia yells out the window* You guys are it! Oh, and here's your pelt *Nekones pelt lands next to the spoon and peels of laughter can be heard throughout the castle*

OOC: I haven't picked a team... Who is on what team?

IC: We're just flinging peasants randomly for fun!

OOC: So far it's Nekone and TCG against me. TCG and I are the only ones who can't change teams, so do with that what you will.

For now, we catapult peasants EVERYWHERE!!! *catapults three at a time*

Woohooo!!!!! Gee, the peasants don't seem to enjoy it much... wait I know!

*gets out gasoline and lights peasants on fire and then catapults them*

Flaming peasants.... fore!!!!!!

Nekone is nekked! *gets binoculars since I'm still at the top of the castle* Woohooo!!!!... Yes, Master S., you can look too, but you can't touch unless I say so.are shaved cats a fetish for you?... hmmm... good to know... ;)

OOC: Technically, I'm not supposed to decide how it works on you, or in fact, who it works on. I'll do it this time. But part of the funny is see what how your mind will make the trap I set up work. If you need an example see the trap I set for TCG at the end of the last thread.OOC: OIC... next time then.


*Nekone hits the ground and tries to claw at it to keep from slidding and spinning into Jocabia's trap. Nekone slides into a small stick that appears to be holding a large spoon back that hits him in the tail end with a large smack sending him flying into the large spider web. Nekone is naked spread-eagle and stuck to a web.*

*Jocabia yells out the window* You guys are it! Oh, and here's your pelt *Nekones pelt lands next to the spoon and peels of laughter can be heard throughout the castle**tries for the dignified look while stuck to the web...*

Meeeeeeooooorrrrrr
[errrr yeah... I knew that would happen... yep... I did.... ]

*Jocabia completely forgets to watch his trap work and leans out the window**the rat Joc stepped on exacts his revenge while Joc is leaning out the window. Biting the Goat so that it runs into Joc.*

OOC: not a trap, so we're still it. Oh and Hype, TCG and I are on one "Team" joc and who knows are on another.

are shaved cats a fetish for you?... hmmm... good to know... ;)

OOC: OIC... next time then.


*tries for the dignified look while stuck to the web...*

Meeeeeeooooorrrrrr
[errrr yeah... I knew that would happen... yep... I did.... ]

*the rat Joc stepped on exacts his revenge while Joc is leaning out the window. Biting the Goat so that it runs into Joc.*

OOC: not a trap, so we're still it. Oh and Hype, TCG and I are on one "Team" joc and who knows are on another.

*The goat hits Jocabia in the butt, ending his laughter and sending him flying into the oil-soaked ground which he slides across and smacks into the back of the spoon.*

That goat hurt my a- *mods pelt Jocabia with various medical instruments. Jocabia takes of running when a syringe sticks into his eyeball. As Jocabia runs away he runs into the web and breaks Nekone free, then Jocabia runs off.*

OOC: Hype, everyone is free to join a team as they see fit. If you want to play choose a side and set or spring a trap depending on if you're on the 'it' team or the 'not it' team. TCG may do some recruiting but I don't really intend to. I intend to let my ingenuity draw people to the dark side... I mean, my side.

*walks outside of the castle to watch, leaving his catapult trap still sprung outside the main room*

*watches the flying, burning peasants*

Oh, by the way, it was me who shaved LP's tongue off. :p Now... I don't know how many peasants Hype has just sent on to, uh, a better place, so since I'm trying to keep count this is an estimate.


(Hype's peasants' count: 31 remaining)

are shaved cats a fetish for you?... hmmm... good to know... ;)

OOC: OIC... next time then.


*tries for the dignified look while stuck to the web...*

Meeeeeeooooorrrrrr
[errrr yeah... I knew that would happen... yep... I did.... ]

*the rat Joc stepped on exacts his revenge while Joc is leaning out the window. Biting the Goat so that it runs into Joc.*

OOC: not a trap, so we're still it. Oh and Hype, TCG and I are on one "Team" joc and who knows are on another.

OK, Master S. and I will be on the TCG team along with kitty kat. :fluffle:

*walks outside of the castle to watch, leaving his catapult trap still sprung outside the main room*

*watches the flying, burning peasants*

Oh, by the way, it was me who shaved LP's tongue off. :p Now... I don't know how many peasants Hype has just sent on to, uh, a better place, so since I'm trying to keep count this is an estimate.


(Hype's peasants' count: 31 remaining)

Ariddia, you are on the TCG team, correct? We, (Master Sadisto and I) just joined that one. Come on! We have a flaming peasant catapult! woohooo!!!

OK, Master S. and I will be on the TCG team along with kitty kat. :fluffle:

Wait... Aren't I already on your team? Doesn't that leave Joc rather on his own?

*grins evilly*

*turns to look at a peasant, and bats him out of the window with his penguin*

SPLATT!

But it was you who was flinging peasants at us.
*indicates the peasant wall shielding her now*

Ariddia, you are on the TCG team, correct? We, (Master Sadisto and I) just joined that one. Come on! We have a flaming peasant catapult! woohooo!!!

Yay!

Can we aim your catapult at Joc? Bombard him with flaming peasants?

*Picks pelt up and carries it back into the castle with what shreds of dignity he has left.*

Merffff
[Luckily I have Rogane...]

Wait... Aren't I already on your team? Doesn't that leave Joc rather on his own?

*grins evilly*

*turns to look at a peasant, and bats him out of the window with his penguin*

SPLATT!

All of us agains Joc! *evil laugh* I wonder if I should send Master S. down there to "play" with him. No men really like Master S. playing with them. That wouldn't be a trap though... well, if he got stuck...

OOC: lmao!

IC: Nekone, are you still nekked? Should I go get your pelt for you?

*Picks pelt up and carries it back into the castle with what shreds of dignity he has left.*

Merffff
[Luckily I have Rogane...]

You beat me to it... do you want to try the peasant catapult? It might cheer you uuuup? *smiles evilly*

*Picks pelt up and carries it back into the castle with what shreds of dignity he has left.*

Merffff
[Luckily I have Rogane...]

OOC: Too bad you don't have a spellchecker ;) By the way guys, keep in mind that you only generally have control over yourself. You can try to do things to me or people on my team (cough, nobody) but it is ultimately up to them how your efforts turn out. That's the fun. You set up a trap and your 'opponent' decides how it turns out. I only completed the trap for Nekone because he asked me to.

By the way, nice how it's all against Jocabia. I bet I would have tons of people on my team if my breasts were as nice as TCG's.

OOC: Too bad you don't have a spellchecker ;) By the way guys, keep in mind that you only generally have control over yourself. You can try to do things to me or people on my team (cough, nobody) but it is ultimately up to them how your efforts turn out. That's the fun. You set up a trap and your 'opponent' decides how it turns out. I only completed the trap for Nekone because he asked me to.

OOC: That's why I'm catapulting flaming peasants randomly... you can decide if one hits you... :p

*sets fire to a screaming peasant calmly, and places her in the catapult*

*aims it carefully at Joc*

*sets fire to a screaming peasant calmly, and places her in the catapult*

*aims it carefully at Joc*

No matter where they land, they make the greatest 'splatting' sound. *evil grin*

*rolls in vat of the famous hair restorer...*

Merrower...
[change in plan boys... we got some more friends... Joc is the target now...]

No matter where they land, they make the greatest 'splatting' sound. *evil grin*

True.

*fires the peasant, and watches her sail screaming through the air toward Joc*


(Hype's peasants' count: 29 remaining)

No matter where they land, they make the greatest 'splatting' sound. *evil grin*
OOC: and such pretty designs when they hit the ground... Gotta go guys... see ya monday.

True.

*fires the peasant, and watches her sail screaming through the air toward Joc*


(Hype's peasants' count: 29 remaining)

*Jocabia draws his sword and cuts the peasant in two along the length. The halves pass on either side of Jocabia.* You're still it and attacking does not equal a trap.

*Slips and hits his head on a rock* Son of a b- *looks around* bi-ig beautiful sky. See, mods, no swearing here.

*turns to walk away, stubs his toe* Goddessdam- *the mods start throwing various feminine hygeine products. Oddly, Cog, had the most*

Bye, Nekone!

*pets Nekone as he leaves*

*gets another peasant, sets him on fire, and catapults him at Joc*

We've got lots more where that came from. Let's see you dodge them all.


(Hype's peasants' count: 28 remaining)

*rolls in vat of the famous hair restorer...*

Merrower...
[change in plan boys... we got some more friends... Joc is the target now...]

Do you want to catapult a flaming peasant, Nekone? Come on... I know you want to... *grins* You can aim it at Joc. *evil laugh*

Do you want to catapult a flaming peasant, Nekone? Come on... I know you want to... *grins* You can aim it at Joc. *evil laugh*

I think Nekone's left... :(

We should aim the peasants to try and drive Joc back inside the castle. There's my trap awaiting him there.

Oh, and... what if we cut the peasants into several pieces before catapulting them? Greater chance of some pieces hitting Joc then...

OOC: Ugh! Too late... My puter went wonky.

IC. Hitting you with things doesn't count you say? Well it's still fun! *evil grin... Let's a flaming peasant fly*

Bye, Nekone!

*pets Nekone as he leaves*

*gets another peasant, sets him on fire, and catapults him at Joc*

We've got lots more where that came from. Let's see you dodge them all.


(Hype's peasants' count: 28 remaining)

Who has to dodge? *Steps behind a large rock. Stretches out and begins to prepare his dinner. The peasant lands next to the rock and rolls up next to Jocabia. Jocabia reaches out and pulls the peasants legs off and arranges them into a fire he can cook upon. Begins cooking the rest of the peasant for a midafternoon snack.*

This isn't going to be enough. Can you launch a few more at me?

I think Nekone's left... :(

We should aim the peasants to try and drive Joc back inside the castle. There's my trap awaiting him there.

Oh, and... what if we cut the peasants into several pieces before catapulting them? Greater chance of some pieces hitting Joc then...

You know what else we could do? Take your beloved penguin, secure it tightly to a giant bungee cord... catapult it and Joc, and the penguin comes back! We just have to get out of the way of the returning penguin. *Grins* I've been trying to come up with new uses for that thing all day!

See? If we catapult the penguin AND a flaming peasant, the penguin would have broken the rock... flaming peasant on Joc! Oh! That's almost poetry! *maniacal laugh*

Who has to dodge? *Steps behind a large rock. Stretches out and begins to prepare his dinner. The peasant lands next to the rock and rolls up next to Jocabia. Jocabia reaches out and pulls the peasants legs off and arranges them into a fire he can cook upon. Begins cooking the rest of the peasant for a midafternoon snack.*

This isn't going to be enough. Can you launch a few more at me?

Eww... he's eating gasoline soaked burnt peasant... Tacky. I bet you never get into the NICE restaurants. *Hype shakes her head* For shame, Joc!

You know what else we could do? Take your beloved penguin, secure it tightly to a giant bungee cord... catapult it and Joc, and the penguin comes back! We just have to get out of the way of the returning penguin. *Grins* I've been trying to come up with new uses for that thing all day!

Ooh! I didn't want to risk my penguin, but that's a brilliant idea!

*grabs another peasant, sets her on fire, and chops her (messily) into several bits with his penguin*

*puts the bits on the catapult*

*adds the penguin, tied securely to a bungee cord*

*fires the lot at Joc*


(Hype's peasants' count: 26 remaining)

*Jocabia finishes his meal and jogs toward the castle for a beer*

OOC: If you've got a trap for me, let's here it. Cuz I'm coming in.

*Jocabia finishes his meal and jogs toward the castle for a beer*

OOC: If you've got a trap for me, let's here it. Cuz I'm coming in.

OOC: There's a catapult, powered by two horses, that will propel you onto a sword protruding from the wall, as soon as you step inside. It's been there for a while, but for now it's only trapped, uh... me... I was pushed...

*sees the bungying penguin come hurtling back after having shattered the rock*

*prepares to dodge, and places a peasant in its trajectory*

*sees the bungying penguin come hurtling back after having shattered the rock*

*prepares to dodge, and places a peasant in its trajectory*

Way to go Ariddia! I ought to be an entrepreneur. I could create weapons, dungeon devices and such.

Oh yes, I remember you setting up the horse thing this morning! *waits in anticipation*

OOC: There's a catapult, powered by two horses, that will propel you onto a sword protruding from the wall, as soon as you step inside. It's been there for a while, but for now it's only trapped, uh... me... I was pushed...

OOC: Oh, forgot about that one.

IC:

*Jocabia jogs into the main room opens the refrigerator and grabs an ice-cold Samual Adams Summer Ale. He slowly drinks it down.*

Mmmm... that really hits the spot after a bit of peasant.

*Jocabia notices one of the doors is closed and the castle is rather warm.*

Now, who closed this? You're killing the breeze in here, ya hear me?!?! *he yells out at no one in particular. He opens the door and sees a platform flying at him and hears the whinnying of horses. He manages to avoid letting the platform catch him in the face but it contacts with his body and propels him across the room and impales his leg on the sword.*

Ok, that sucked.

*grins*

You know, we should have set fire to that sword, too... Now that would have been painful!

And yes, you'd make a great entrepreneur! :D

Hmm... We've now used up half our peasants. We should use the rest wisely.


(Hype's peasants' count: 25 remaining)

OOC: Oh, forgot about that one.

IC:

*Jocabia jogs into the main room opens the refrigerator and grabs an ice-cold Samual Adams Summer Ale. He slowly drinks it down.*

Mmmm... that really hits the spot after a bit of peasant.

*Jocabia notices one of the doors is closed and the castle is rather warm.*

Now, who closed this? You're killing the breeze in here, ya hear me?!?! *he yells out at no one in particular. He opens the door and sees a platform flying at him and hears the whinnying of horses. He manages to avoid letting the platform catch him in the face but it contacts with his body and propels him across the room and impales his leg on the sword.*

Ok, that sucked.

Woohoo Ariddia! We're both evil entrepreneurial material... Perhaps we should start "Evil Inc." Oh, that name's taken by my health insurance company.

*Throws throwing knives at Joc while he's down*

*goes down to see Joc, dragging a peasant with him*

*sets fire to the peasant, places him in front of the horse-and-elastic catapult, and prepares to catapult him at Joc while he's pinned to the wall*

*grins*

You know, we should have set fire to that sword, too... Now that would have been painful!

And yes, you'd make a great entrepreneur! :D

Hmm... We've now used up half our peasants. We should use the rest wisely.


(Hype's peasants' count: 25 remaining)

Not a problem Arid... Master S. and I have a special dungeon below all the other dungeons, which actually has a doorway to hell... (Makes disposing of bodies so easy... chuck them into hell, no fuss no muss.) We refer to it as THAT dungeon. Master S. and I are the only ones who know where it is. We have a HUGE stock of peasants, and some royals too! I can have Master S. get a wagon full any time... I want to torture some royals!!!

So use those peasants any way you want and as fast as you want!

*goes down to see Joc, dragging a peasant with him*

*sets fire to the peasant, places him in front of the horse-and-elastic catapult, and prepares to catapult him at Joc while he's pinned to the wall*


*throws more gasoline on peasant so it will really flame... and smell bad*

Not a problem Arid... Master S. and I have a special dungeon below all the other dungeons, which actually has a doorway to hell... (Makes disposing of bodies so easy... chuck them into hell, no fuss no muss.) We refer to it as THAT dungeon. Master S. and I are the only ones who know where it is. We have a HUGE stock of peasants, and some royals too! I can have Master S. get a wagon full any time... I want to torture some royals!!!

So use those peasants any way you want and as fast as you want!

Ooh! That's lovely! And yes, catapulting royals will add a whole new level of fun!

*hugs her, and catapults his burning peasant toward Joc*


(Hype's peasants' count: 24 remaining)

Woohoo Ariddia! We're both evil entrepreneurial material... Perhaps we should start "Evil Inc." Oh, that name's taken by my health insurance company.

*Throws throwing knives at Joc while he's down*

*Catches the knives and throws them back*

I'm hurt not dead. And that really did suck. I need that leg.

*Extracts the sword from his leg and the wall and throws that at Hype also.*

Well, I suppose I'm it.

*Limps over to the window and jumps out, landing once again on the oil-soaked ground and sliding into the back of the spoon*

Ok, now that's getting annoying.

*He shakes his fist up at the castle, you guys are gonna pay. He whistles for a cab and when it comes near, the license plate says fresh and it has dice in the mirror. If anything he could say that this cab is rare, but he though, "nah, forget it. Yo holmes to Bel Aire!" In other words, Jocabia disappears.*

OOC: I'm out for the night. Talk to y'all later.

Ooh! That's lovely! And yes, catapulting royals will add a whole new level of fun!

*hugs her, and catapults his burning peasant toward Joc*


(Hype's peasants' count: 24 remaining)

*hugs back... Master S. hugs Arid and nearly crushes him... Hype whips him with a cat-o-nines and a flail* Did I say you could hug Arid? You'll be punished further later!

w00t!

Aww... He's gone! Who are we going to throw peasants at now?

*grabs a peasant girl, goes and washes her, then starts to eat her, thinking as he munches on his food*

Perhaps we should set traps for each other, if there's no-one from the enemy team?

Aww... He's gone! Who are we going to throw peasants at now?

*grabs a peasant girl, goes and washes her, then starts to eat her, thinking as he munches on his food*

Perhaps we should set traps for each other, if there's no-one from the enemy team?

OOC: This is why we made teams. Because if there are people from each team on the game continues. Too bad you all decided to be on the same team.

OOC: This is why we made teams. Because if there are people from each team on the game continues. Too bad you all decided to be on the same team.

*tosses a final peasant at Joc*

Shoo!

Catches sword Joc threw. I should have thrown poison tipped shurikins.

We could think of another trap for Joc's team? Apparently pelting them with rocks and garbage doesn't count as a trap...

Hey, if TCG is mortal, she's not MADE of chocolate is she? Because then she'll shatter or melt easily... :confused:

Catches sword Joc threw. I should have thrown poison tipped shurikins.

We could think of another trap for Joc's team? Apparently pelting them with rocks and garbage doesn't count as a trap...

*spanks his lunch to get her to stop screaming, and finishes gobbling her up*

*burps*

Sorry... Hmm... What if we design a trap that results in their being pelted with rocks and garbage?

Hey, if TCG is mortal, she's not MADE of chocolate is she? Because then she'll shatter or melt easily... :confused:

I don't think she's actually made of chocolate... Which is a shame really. Because if she was immortal and made of chocolate, we could eat her and she'd just keep re-appearing anyway... I suppose...

*ponders*

*spanks his lunch to get her to stop screaming, and finishes gobbling her up*

*burps*

Sorry... Hmm... What if we design a trap that results in their being pelted with rocks and garbage?

It's so Letterman! I love it! Master S. here... I don't think you've been introduced. No speaking Master S. Ariddia, this is my personal and willing slave, Master Sadisto. He is nothing but muscle, so he can help with any heavy lifting.

Where are we going to get the garbage? I haven't been around for a while, so I don't know what's where lately...

I don't think she's actually made of chocolate... Which is a shame really. Because if she was immortal and made of chocolate, we could eat her and she'd just keep re-appearing anyway... I suppose...

*ponders*

I love dark chocolate! But eating the team leader probably would be a bit tacky... Even if it's really good dark chocolate and we're really hungry...
*mind wanders to eating TCG... slaps self* STOP IT! She's your team leader!!!

Let's think of a trap!

It's so Letterman! I love it! Master S. here... I don't think you've been introduced. No speaking Master S. Ariddia, this is my personal and willing slave, Master Sadisto. He is nothing but muscle, so he can help with any heavy lifting.

Where are we going to get the garbage? I haven't been around for a while, so I don't know what's where lately...

Hello, Master S.!

Well... we could use the remains of Joc's trap as garbage, for starters. Then there's that rock we shattered. And all those knives. And the bodies of about two dozen peasants.

I love dark chocolate! But eating the team leader probably would be a bit tacky... Even if it's really good dark chocolate and we're really hungry...
*mind wanders to eating TCG... slaps self* STOP IT! She's your team leader!!!

Let's think of a trap!

We'll ask her when she gets back. And if we're really hungry perhaps she'll let us eat part of her. :)

*realises he hasn't had any dessert after eating his peasant*

*longs for some chocolate*

Ah, well... Let's see... Could we just dig a big hole outside the front door, and tip all the garbage on them from the top of the castle when they fall in? But we need something to cover the hole...

Hello, Master S.!

Well... we could use the remains of Joc's trap as garbage, for starters. Then there's that rock we shattered. And all those knives. And the bodies of about two dozen peasants.


OOOOOh! Burnt and decomposing peasants! *evil grin* I have endless weapons in my dungeon. If you don't know, I'm the BDSM Mistress here, thus we have EVERYTHING!

We could get a ton of knives and take the handles off, stick the dull end in the peasants, so when they hit, the person gets burnt and stabbed with a burning knife!!! *grins*

We'll ask her when she gets back. And if we're really hungry perhaps she'll let us eat part of her. :)

*realises he hasn't had any dessert after eating his peasant*

*longs for some chocolate*

Ah, well... Let's see... Could we just dig a big hole outside the front door, and tip all the garbage on them from the top of the castle when they fall in? But we need something to cover the hole...

I can have Master S. take the top part of the ground off angled inwards a tiny bit on the inside, and then dig it out, and after everything's in there, we replace the piece of ground and no one knows anything, because they won't be able to see the lines around the hole!

On the inside of the dirt from the top part that will be replaced, daggers facing UP! So when they fall inside, the daggers stab their feet!

OOOOOh! Burnt and decomposing peasants! *evil grin* I have endless weapons in my dungeon. If you don't know, I'm the BDSM Mistress here, thus we have EVERYTHING!

We could get a ton of knives and take the handles off, stick the dull end in the peasants, so when they hit, the person gets burnt and stabbed with a burning knife!!! *grins*

Peasant knives! What an idea!

You're a very useful person to have around a castle. :D

We still need something to cover the hole, though...

And we can pour boiling oil and drop flaming peasants or anything we want from that window opening 3 stories up! *evil grin* And they'll be stuck in the hole!

I can have Master S. take the top part of the ground off angled inwards a tiny bit on the inside, and then dig it out, and after everything's in there, we replace the piece of ground and no one knows anything, because they won't be able to see the lines around the hole!

On the inside of the dirt from the top part that will be replaced, daggers facing UP! So when they fall inside, the daggers stab their feet!

That's... ingenious! All right, I'll start gathering the garbage and hauling it to the top of the castle.

And we can pour boiling oil and drop flaming peasants or anything we want from that window opening 3 stories up! *evil grin* And they'll be stuck in the hole!

*giggles excitedly*

We're evil geniuses!

We can put the peasants in the boiling oil and pour them down together on the people in the hole!

*giggles excitedly*

We're evil geniuses!

We can put the peasants in the boiling oil and pour them down together on the people in the hole!


And then drop flaming torches into the hole!!! Master S., dig a hole over here. *points to area and shows size* We need the top preserved and about 6" thick for now... no ridged edges. The top will fit in exactly as it looks now.

Ariddia... how many feet deep should it be? And someone's going to have to tell our own people not to walk over there!

And then drop flaming torches into the hole!!! Master S., dig a hole over here. *points to area and shows size* We need the top preserved and about 6" thick for now... no ridged edges. The top will fit in exactly as it looks now.

Ariddia... how many feet deep should it be? And someone's going to have to tell our own people not to walk over there!

The deeper the better! But it should be fairly narrow...

And if our people fall in, we just won't drop things on them!

The deeper the better! But it should be fairly narrow...

And if our people fall in, we just won't drop things on them!

OK, you heard the man. Master S. Make the hole 30 feet deep.

That should make plenty of room for garbage and all the other nasty things that will fall on them! And we should put salt on the bottom! When the knives go through their feet, they'll land on salt! Bwahahahahahahaaaaa!

I just thought of something. Is there anyone else on Joc's team besides himself? Aren't he and LP always feuding? Oh, I think Randomea, but she comes and goes...

OK, you heard the man. Master S. Make the hole 30 feet deep.

That should make plenty of room for garbage and all the other nasty things that will fall on them! And we should put salt on the bottom! When the knives go through their feet, they'll land on salt! Bwahahahahahahaaaaa!

I just thought of something. Is there anyone else on Joc's team besides himself? Aren't he and LP always feuding? Oh, I think Randomea, but she comes and goes...

Good question... Yes, I think Randomea's on his team.

Yes, salt; that's nasty! And itching powder! And alcohol; that'll sink nicely into the wounds!

*finishes hauling up all the garbage*

I have to go now... But at least they'll have a pleasant surprise when they come back. :)

Oh, and, just to keep count...


(Hype's peasants' count: 22 remaining)

Ciao Arid! Keep working Master S. You know what has to be done. You can do it all, and I won't punish you. I was going to lock your private library for 2 days. *Master S. looks up, and through his leather face mask, the eye holes are open now, tears well up.* I know how much you suffer when you can't read your daily dose of Quantum Physics. *evil laugh* But since you are doing all this work, I'll forgo the punishment. *Master S. stops what he's doing and kisses Mistress Hype's boots.* OK, I get the idea. You're welcome. Now make this exactly the way Ariddia and I talked about.

*sigh* Too bad I will likely not be here to see it happen. *goes back to dungeon leaving Master S. to finish the project* I need a nap...

*she comes back up the stairs *deep sigh* dressed in a dark chocolate suit (drawring to come). her planning has gone well, but now she is thirsty and famished. she stops dead in her tracks and her eyes grow wide in astonishment: on her tassled pillow pile, there is a bowl of cocoala mole, just what she's been craving. How can that be? Unless... no, that would be too cruel... She thinks of spiced hot cocoa, and a mug appears beside the bowl. her eyes narrow in fury*

Oh that does it! of all the residual powers that have nothing to do with godhood, this is what i get? damn me for being a nation's spiritual leader! I mean chocolate?!!! i don't frigging know which god or goddess you enlisted to help you with this, Joc, but you'd better start praying...

*she goes to the pillow pile, sits and starts eating, plotting her revenge*

OOC yay me for having a big team but... erm... you guys know that i have lost my Goddesshood temporarily, right?

Yes, that's why Arid and I were wondering if you were actually chocolate now and edible. :p

Yes, that's why Arid and I were wondering if you were actually chocolate now and edible. :p

ooc: lmao - no not made of chocolate, but it seems i can still call up cocoa in some form or another. lemme know if you have a craving ;)

*she finishes her bowl of cocoala mole and cup of spiced cocoa and lays back. the worst of her discomfort is over... she still can't believe she feels compelled to wear clothes, but she seems to be adjusting to everything else.*

*she suddenly gets up and goes to the mailbox. not in yet. Why is it that some people have instant mail, and i have to wait? i yes... powers... she grinds her teeth and goes back to look out the window at Joc's earlier trap...*

He sure likes those mechanical contraptions...
*she suddenly beams*

*Jocabia walks across the plain, his leg wrapped in some kind of plant. With each step, his gait becomes noticeably better. Soon no limp can be detected.*

I can't believe I forgot he put that stupid catapult there. *he mutters to himself*

*Suddenly there is a gleam in his eye. In the darkness, he builds a large bonfire, one he knows will attract predators, particularly TCG's team. He builds a replica of himself and positions it to make it seem to be sleeping. Up close and personal, no one would fall for such a lame trick, but no one is going to get close. He is surrounded on three sides by a sheer rock face so it seems obvious which direction they will come from, hopefully expecting to be able to set a trap and catch him upon his awakening.*

*He begins to put a trap in place. He strings a thin thread across the pass into the area he has "made camp". The thread is attached to a board that releases a boulder. Once the boulder is properly positioned, he places a series of thistle bushes on the ground in front of the thread and then wooden coffin filled with molasses. Finally he places a long pole next to the coffin and puts a message on top. Then Jocabia flees before his opponents arrive.*

*Jocabia walks across the plain, his leg wrapped in some kind of plant. With each step, his gait becomes noticeably better. Soon no limp can be detected.*

I can't believe I forgot he put that stupid catapult there. *he mutters to himself*

*Suddenly there is a gleam in his eye. In the darkness, he builds a large bonfire, one he knows will attract predators, particularly TCG's team. He builds a replica of himself and positions it to make it seem to be sleeping. Up close and personal, no one would fall for such a lame trick, but no one is going to get close. He is surrounded on three sides by a sheer rock face so it seems obvious which direction they will come from, hopefully expecting to be able to set a trap and catch him upon his awakening.*

*He begins to put a trap in place. He strings a thin thread across the pass into the area he has "made camp". The thread is attached to a board that releases a boulder. Once the boulder is properly positioned, he places a series of thistle bushes on the ground in front of the thread and then wooden coffin filled with molasses. Finally he places a long pole next to the coffin and puts a message on top. Then Jocabia flees before his opponents arrive.*

*she is suddenly distracted from her plans by a faint light in the woods. now, the peasants are all aware that this game is on by now, but none of them would be fooling enough to venture this close, they could be collateral damage. she goes back to her pillow pile and retrieves her daggers, and her whip, and she heads for the gate.

she walks quietly towards the light, and she seems to see a form... *gasp* a silhouette she knows all too well, in fact. Jocabia! she moves a little quicker so she can surprise him.

unfortunately, something falls on her head and she tries to grab it in a panicked motion. she turns on herself, struggling and only feels the thin string when her ankle brushes agains it. too late*

*she is suddenly distracted from her plans by a faint light in the woods. now, the peasants are all aware that this game is on by now, but none of them would be fooling enough to venture this close, they could be collateral damage. she goes back to her pillow pile and retrieves her daggers, and her whip, and she heads for the gate.

she walks quietly towards the light, and she seems to see a form... *gasp* a silhouette she knows all too well, in fact. Jocabia! she moves a little quicker so she can surprise him.

unfortunately, something falls on her head and she tries to grab it in a panicked motion. she turns on herself, struggling and only feels the thin string when her ankle brushes agains it. too late*

*Jocabia looks on as she stumbles over the thread he'd placed in her path and stifles his laughter. A grinding noise can be heard as the boulder begins its motion.*

* - snip -
unfortunately, something falls on her head and she tries to grab it in a panicked motion. she turns on herself, struggling and only feels the thin string when her ankle brushes agains it. too late*

*she hears a release mechanism from somewhere, she can't pinpoint where... but she can hear something big coming. she pushes forward, trying to escape this infernal trap, yes, she, trapped again! and steps on thistles.

she lets out a cry of pain, unlike any other because, well, she has never felt pain before. she puts her other foot down to help with the weight, only to step in thisltes... again.

she howls in pain again, wondering how she will live through this, hobbling out of the thistles and she loses her balance and falls a short while before hitting the bottom. all sticky. the hole goes all black as something rolls over it and continues on.

she hears a sharp crack and looks up. there is a note at the end of a pole not 2 inches from her face: "You're it!"

*she hears a release mechanism from somewhere, she can't pinpoint where... but she can hear something big coming. she pushes forward, trying to escape this infernal trap, yes, she, trapped again! and steps on thistles.

she lets out a cry of pain, unlike any other because, well, she has never felt pain before. she puts her other foot down to help with the weight, only to step in thisltes... again.

she howls in pain again, wondering how she will live through this, hobbling out of the thistles and she loses her balance and falls a short while before hitting the bottom. all sticky. the hole goes all black as something rolls over it and continues on.

she hears a sharp crack and looks up. there is a note at the end of a pole not 2 inches from her face: "You're it!"

Hype and Master S. hear her scream. They run over to the trap and pull TCG out of it. Master S. carries her through the side door of the castle and brings her to her room and sets her on the floor, not wanting to get molasses all over her pillows. Mistress Hype begins the arduous process of removing the thistles from TCG. Hype sees what looks like a large vial of Cocoaine.

"Use some of this TCG. It will make this easier." Master S. and Mistress Hype continue to remove the thistles.

"Master S.! Go get some warm water and a sponge and bathe TCG. Get ALL the molasses off her!" He bows and goes to get the water.

"Don't worry, Arid and I made the trap of all traps last night. Joc's in for a surprise! It will make this look like fun." *laughs evilly*

"I hope you don't mind if I help myself to some of this cocoaine?" Hype does some of it and is in heaven... Over and over she repeats, "I love dark chocolate. I love dark chocolate."

Hype, who always enjoyed her chemicals, just kept doing more cocoaine while Master S. bathed TCG and then layed her on her pillows with a silk sheet.

Master S. carries off Mistress Hype to take her back to their dungeon, while she continues to say "I love dark chocolate", repeatedly for hours.

<snip>
*Master S. carries off Mistress Hype to take her back to their dungeon, while she continues to say "I love dark chocolate", repeatedly for hours.*

*she slowly wakes from her drug-induced daze. she remembers being pulled out from the hole, and carried, and bathed, and bandaged... and the cocoaine!

she tries to open her eyes, and looks around. she is lying on her dais of tassled pillows, covered in a satin sheet, but no one seems to be around. she tries to rise and gingerly puts weight on her feet... But of course, the castle wants our sacrifice, not our deaths. she removes the gauze and finds her feet healed. Good. she'll need them to set things into play. But first, some clothes. she goes in search of clothes, chuckling.*

You are a worthy opponent, my dear Champion. I AM IT?!!!
*giggles*
Not for long...

*she comes out of her lab. she has been hard at workon new, interesting pharmaceutical combinations. her clients... erm. patients will be pleased. stretching, she looks around for signs of life. With this new game being played, it seems everyone is busy plotting and scheming. no matter. she can always slip them something while they are not looking later. and sit and watch.*

What'd I miss?

TCG, if you read back far enough, Arid and I made an elaborate trap... You won't be it for long. *evil laugh* Bwahahahahaha!!!

Glad you're feeling better... Sorry I used so much of your cocoaine. ;)

Ummm... TCG? What will it take to get some more of that Cocoaine! It rocks!

TCG, if you read back far enough, Arid and I made an elaborate trap... You won't be it for long. *evil laugh* Bwahahahahaha!!!

Glad you're feeling better... Sorry I used so much of your cocoaine. ;)

*Jocabia walked across the castle grounds absently feeding the goat (from his earlier trap) apples. It bounded around the ground excited by its new friend when suddenly it disappears. Jocabia runs over and sees it has fallen into a large hole in the ground. It has been shreaded by hundreds of knives and then tortured by salt and alcohol.*

*Jocabia looks around and shouts*

What part of game did you not understand? You don't want to play this way with me.

*Jocabia's eyes burn with fire as he charges off*

TCG, if you read back far enough, Arid and I made an elaborate trap... You won't be it for long. *evil laugh* Bwahahahahaha!!!


Indeed!

*cackles, and rubs his hands gleefully*

*looks at the Goddess a little sorrowfully, now that he knows for sure she's not made of chocolate and he can't nibble her*

*Jocabia walked across the castle grounds absently feeding the goat (from his earlier trap) apples. It bounded around the ground excited by its new friend when suddenly it disappears. Jocabia runs over and sees it has fallen into a large hole in the ground. It has been shreaded by hundreds of knives and then tortured by salt and alcohol.*

*Jocabia looks around and shouts*

What part of game did you not understand? You don't want to play this way with me.

*Jocabia's eyes burn with fire as he charges off*

*Catapults flaming peasants and garbage at Joc* "You RUINED our TRAP!" *pouts*

*Jocabia walked across the castle grounds absently feeding the goat (from his earlier trap) apples. It bounded around the ground excited by its new friend when suddenly it disappears. Jocabia runs over and sees it has fallen into a large hole in the ground. It has been shreaded by hundreds of knives and then tortured by salt and alcohol.*

*Jocabia looks around and shouts*

What part of game did you not understand? You don't want to play this way with me.

*Jocabia's eyes burn with fire as he charges off*

Damn!

Oh, well... *looks at Hype*

Shall we wait to see if Randomea falls into the hole too, or shall we tip all the garbage, weapons and dead peasants onto the goat?

Damn!

Oh, well... *looks at Hype*

Shall we wait to see if Randomea falls into the hole too, or shall we tip all the garbage, weapons and dead peasants onto the goat?


Catapult it all at Joc!!!

*Catapults flaming peasants and garbage at Joc* "You RUINED our TRAP!" *pouts*

Aww... *hugs Hype*

Well, catapult a few more peasants; it'll make you feel better. I hope. :(


(Hype's peasants' count: 19 remaining)

Catapult it all at Joc!!!

Well... It was all designed to be tipped, not catapulted.

Perhaps we should wait for Randomea?

Or, if Randomea doesn't fall into it, we can always toss a peasant in...

*she comes down the stairs - dressed - and calls forth a frothy Divine Kiss*
Ariddia, you can still nibble. i am still sweet, just not chocolate sweet. but i can fake that if i must...

OOC: hey kids, once a trap is ruined, it's gone. make up another one.

Oh and btw, I AM IT in regards to Joc, but since he has no other playmates on his team... i guess he is your only target. go you!

*OOC: hey kids, once a trap is ruined, it's gone. make up another one.

Boooo! And it took so long! *sigh* Well, I can hardly think, I'm so tired from thinking up last night's trap. :p

Oh, TCG, what do I have to do to get some of that Cocoaine? I liked it! ;)

Boooo! And it took so long! *sigh* Well, I can hardly think, I'm so tired from thinking up last night's trap. :p

There, there... i know. Joc has thousands of traps in his head, i don't, but i'm working on it

Beware, Oh My Champion... ;)

*she comes down the stairs - dressed - and calls forth a frothy Divine Kiss*
Ariddia, you can still nibble. i am still sweet, just not chocolate sweet. but i can fake that if i must...

OOC: hey kids, once a trap is ruined, it's gone. make up another one.

Oh and btw, I AM IT in regards to Joc, but since he has no other playmates on his team... i guess he is your only target. go you!

The trap isn't quite ruined; we just need to cover it over again. Still, we should think of another one...

*walked over to the Goddess, kisses her neck, then licks it gently to soften it, and starts nibbling*

*hugs her as he does so*

Glad to see you're better now. And yes, you're definitely sweet.

*gives a last lick, and turns to Hype*

How about we watch Joc closely, and sabotage his next trap to use it against him? Poetic justice...

There, there... i know. Joc has thousands of traps in his head, i don't, but i'm working on it

Beware, Oh My Champion... ;)

Ariddia and I have decided that we're entrepreneurial evil geniuses... but some of that cocoaine would help me think better... unsubtle hint :p

The trap isn't quite ruined; we just need to cover it over again. Still, we should think of another one...

*walked over to the Goddess, kisses her neck, then licks it gently to soften it, and starts nibbling*

*hugs her as he does so*

Glad to see you're better now. And yes, you're definitely sweet.

*gives a last lick, and turns to Hype*

How about we watch Joc closely, and sabotage his next trap to use it against him? Poetic justice...


Good idea, but our next trap should be from above, maybe... No licks for me, my evil entrepreneurial counterpart? *sigh Too bad! *Frenches Ariddia and licks his neck as well* :fluffle: :fluffle: :p

Oh, TCG, what do I have to do to get some of that Cocoaine? I liked it! ;)

Here.
*she hands her a kg bag of cocoaine*
Enjoy

*handing over the bag, she reminsces of her last conversation with her avatar and her brother...
Celeste: Why are you playing this infernal game, Most Holy?
TCG: Because i must. this place requires a sacrifice.
Philemon: But why not simply use magic? Even if Your Divinity has been... erm... transfered, you could compensate by...
TCG: NO! No one knows i can do that and i will not! Besides, the castle's spirit is very strong and i am not sure i could, even IF i wanted to, which i don't.
Celeste: But you are getting injured!
TCG: I will call on you if i need healing for this... fragile husk. But still, i am more resiliant than a normal human, and the castle won't let me die. Now off with you two. You have enough power to keep an eye on things, and you can still use the power of prayers, since i am not destroyed, just... misplaced.
*they leave her reluctantly and she finishes dressing before joining the group downstairs*

OOC: There is no one else on my team. I have no idea who LP, Tribes and Randomea will side with or if they will side with anyone.

Good idea, but our next trap should be from above, maybe... No licks for me, my evil entrepreneurial counterpart? *sigh Too bad! *Frenches Ariddia and licks his neck as well* :fluffle: :fluffle: :p

Ooh...

*licks and nibbles Hype's neck, then frenchkisses her hard*

*whispers*
Now you've distracted me. How can I think about evil traps if you do this?

How about removing the floor from the room just above the main doorway? Then we could tip our weapons and garbage and dead peasants and burning oil and all on him as he walks in...

I've got to go now; I'll let you think about it.

*gives Hype a final lick, and fades away*

Ooh...

*licks and nibbles Hype's neck, then frenchkisses her hard*

*whispers*
Now you've distracted me. How can I think about evil traps if you do this?



OK, let's try to shake it off... Think "Pain for Joc... Pain for Joc..."

TCG? How about that cocoaine? I'd hate to have to try to make it myself! I'm not the best chemist... Who knows what I'd come up with...

Well, Arid, we have the penguin and bungee to smash Joc's rocks... OOOH! I just thought of something... a trap that bungees the penguin into the family jewels... BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAH! *evil grin*

What's all this then?

Here.
*she hands her a kg bag of cocoaine*
Enjoy




Thank you! OK, no more planning with Ariddia gone. Joc, Randomea will side with you, but aren't you and Tribes "feuding" or something?

What's all this then?


It's the game... Check out the first post... and maybe the last couple pages... Join Joc's team... he needs members! :fluffle:

What's all this then?
OOC
Hey Zatarack, please read the first parag on the first post.

Essentially, we are trying to revive the castle. it's dying and demands blood sacrifices... from the castlemates. so we tag each other by way of traps...

IM me if you need more info

Thank you! OK, no more planning with Ariddia gone. Joc, Randomea will side with you, but aren't you and Tribes "feuding" or something?

OOC: Randomea gets to decide who Randomea sides with. Just like you did. I welcome anyone to my team, but no one will be conscripted. And Tribes and I just like to keep it entertaining.

OOC: Randomea gets to decide who Randomea sides with. Just like you did. I welcome anyone to my team, but no one will be conscripted. And Tribes and I just like to keep it entertaining.

OOC: I thought Randomea already sided with you yesterday or the day before... my bad....

No, what's going on right now?

I've been gone too long.

HYPE, ARIDDIA,
i'd go with the penguin idea and improve on that...