World Cup 37: RP thread [Archive] - Page 3

Dance 2 Revolution

07-10-2007, 11:41

Maeda: I see you *finally* got the coverage sorted for the World Cup proper.
Melex: We have.
Maeda: Will coverage continue if we qualify?
Melex: We haven't prepared for that situation.
Maeda: What do you mean?!
Melex: Channel 57 don't see D2R qualifying from their group.
Maeda: Hmph. Does no-one have faith in Ferriol? I can't be prepared to take a risk with any of the coverage from now on. Channel 57 can take the rest of the group stages but you aren't taking any more...Hell, I don't know how you can claim to be a professional television station. (Maeda walks out)

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(Revolutionarian Football Association Press Conference)

Maeda: I would like to currently address the situation about the television rights for Dance 2 Revolution's games. Channel 57 have forfeited their rights from beyond the group stages of World Cup 37. We feel that this is the right decision for all that are involved, and now the rights can move on. We can now announce that Channel 3 have successfully won the rights to air live Dance 2 Revolution matches, and they will commence airing possibly from the Round of 16 and at latest World Cup 38 qualifying. We look forward to this partnership, and are still in discussions about a "special treat" for all you football fans living in Dance 2 Revolution, and no, I can't tell you about it...yet.
We would also like to take this time to say that three of the many planned stadia for Dance 2 Revolution are coming along, and should be finished before the end of this World Cup. We are hoping that the Revolutionarian Football League will be reformed by the end of World Cup 38, and directly increasing the quality of the players that make up the national squad as we attempt to push our way back again towards the top.

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Kajara: Hello, and welcome to the D2R football review! Today on the show we have the highlights of Dance 2 Revolution's two legs with Candelaria and Marquez and a look at Dance 2 Revolution's opponents in the Group Stages. But first, we're joined by Dance 2 Revolution's Manager Darren Ferriol. Darren, welcome.
Ferriol: Thanks, John.
Kajara: So did you think at the beginning of this campaign that you'd be sat here talking about your team in the World Cup proper.
Ferriol: I would like to think that we could have done it, but I was preparing for another Cup of Harmony run, i'll admit.
Kajara: What were your reactions when you drew Candelaria and Marquez?
Ferriol: Oh sh...Haha. It was a tough draw, C&M are an up-and-coming team, and as you could see over the two games, it was a very difficult game for us to win.
Kajara: So the draw...what do you think?
Ferriol: It could have been a nicer draw, lets be honest. All three of the teams will be difficult, but we're hoping we might be able to sneak past into the Round of 16, it's been too long since we were last there. Our match against Sel Appa could very well be an extremely important game for us to win if we want to get through.
Kajara: Thank you Ferriol...now we move on to...

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MD1: Bettia 1 - 1 D2R @ Sioal
MD2: D2R v. The Holy Empire @ Yekr
MD3: Sel Appa v. D2R @ Dirlkae

Jeruselem

07-10-2007, 14:08

Kate Bush was in her room when a cranky Kate Dallas was at the door ...

Kate Dallas: OK, Bushie! What's going on here?
Kate Bush: It's about the Jason Fowler court case right ...
Kate Dallas: Yeah, Mum was there when he said you were selling videos of unsuccessful World Cup 34 team.
Kate Bush: That was a long time ago, you were just a little girl then.

Kate Dallas: Yes, tell me the story! I want to know.
Kate Bush: Did Mum say she covered up for me?
Kate Dallas: Yes, she didn't have much choice really. The government didn't want the scandal to breaking publicly.
Kate Bush: You are part of government now too

Kate Dallas: Yes I am, but at the time I wasn't - just a little girl then. So, tell me!

Kate Bush:
Well, you see my family business was doing badly. My business partner got a loan but it turned out later the lenders where the mob but we didn't know it. We couldn't repay the full amount, so they were pushy about payment. They wanted money and said I should get it anyway - and one of them suggested selling World Cup team information to other nations as I had access to the team. If I sold videos the team to the other three nations, I could make my repayment money and wipe out the debt. I didn't want to do it but the mob said they would kill me and my familty if I didn't.

Kate Dallas: Go on

Kate Bush:
So I copied team training videos and met a guy who said he was from Oliverry. I think he was an international gangster who dealt with this kind of information. Anyway, we met secretly and he said the videos would be limited to our group opponents. Mind you I couldn't trust him still but if I didn't sell those videos - the mob would kill me. I was dealting with international crims, I was betraying Jeruselem and Dazza Dallas and the team but if I didn't - I'd die. After he wanted to have sex with me because he thought it was a good idea. I had to agree to make sure he didn't think I was being dishonest about the deal.

Kate Dallas: So Jason Fowler caught you two making the deal and having sex?

Kate Bush:
He told Dazza Dallas as he said in court. She demanded answers like you are now and well the story I told you. You see, this had gone public then Dazza Dallas would have lost an assistant coach because I would have gone to gaol, and then we'd have a whole international farce with those three other nations. And I would have been killed in gaol along with other people, and Jason Fowler would have been killed too. So we charged him for stalking as a pervert and didn't mention this business.

Kate Dallas: Yes, Mum did the right thing at the time then even it was an injustice to Jason Fowler. If the scam was revealed then, he'd be dead today. That was not any easy choice.
Kate Bush: Yes, look I don't feel proud of the matter but what was I to do?
Kate Dallas: So, where those videos used?
Kate Bush: I don't know. But someone is using them.

Kate Dallas: So that's why you were not assistant coach for World Cup 35 and 36?
Kate Bush: Yes, that's why.
Kate Dallas: Bloody hell, what a mess!
Kate Bush: I'm really sorry ... but at the time that's how it happened. What would you you done if you were your mother?

Kate Dallas: The same
Kate Bush: How are we going to fix it?
Kate Dallas: I'll fix it. Don't worry. I have plans to save Jason Fowler, and put the mob back in it's place even if I have kill someone.
Kate Bush: You're a scheming little bitch like your mother.

Kate Dallas: Yes, that's how a woman survives in Jeruselem.

Az-cz

07-10-2007, 15:13

Amda-Mo: Ouch. We let two points slip away from us today allowing Kiryu-shi to get points in their first ever world cup game.

Lur-Mn: Indeed we did. But we still came away with one. We've rallied back from opening day holes before so we shouldn't panic but that late goal of theirs was painful.

Amda-Mo: Lets talk about that second goal of theirs. What happened?

Lur-Mn: We had pressed too far forward leaving ourselves open for a counterattack. The team just didn't communicate well and a poor pass combined with that meant there was far too much open room. Against any team in this tournament, probably save Oickoidia, that's going to be a costly mistake. And Kiryu-shi took advantage.

Amda-Mo: And the rest of the game?

Lur-Mn: Well Kn-Dg was his usual brilliant self picking up a brace. A number of the midfielders played well. Seoula was a decent decoy but wasn't shooting well today. And the defense will need to tighten up. Neither goal was very good play from the back line.

Amda-Mo: And what about Zax-Im's coaching?

Lur-Mn: Troublesome. Some of those mistakes out there today were pretty bad and the team didn't seem as prepared as it should be. We'll see more going forward.

Amda-Mo: Do you think his position as head coach is in danger?

Lur-Mn: I hate to say such thing, but it might be. Clearly with a group like ours anything less than a trip to the second round will be blatantly unacceptable and really anything less than the semifinals will be a disappointment. So he could be.

Amda-Mo: Now let's look ahead to the next match. Our opponents are a team we haven't met in a long time, Tynelia.

Lur-Mn: They're coming off a loss to The Lowland Clans following their best ever qualifying campaign, so they'll certainly be both skilled and motivated. It will be tough because they're such a defensive minded team which means that our offense will have to be on top form while our defense can't make any mental mistakes. But I think we'll rebound from our opening day troubles the way we usually do.

Amda-Mo: Alright. Now let's get to the rest of the cup. Big suprises?

Lur-Mn: A decent amount of surpsies today. Bettia and us were the biggest names not to get full points, but the biggest suprise was watching Zwangzug fall to Wentland. Although I still think they'll qualify from that group, it was a suprise to see them fall. Sel Appa over Alasdair I Frosticus, wasn't earth shaking but was a small upset as well.

Amda-Mo: Ok, let's wrap things up with the top six after the first set of games.

Lur-Mn: Well not exactly the teams we'd have guessed but here are the teams:

6. Elves Security Forces

The Elves are down here just because of their opponent. They looked wonderful is smashing Oickoidia, but how much can really be learned from that. The elves won't be celebrating this victory so we won't either. If they follow it up with a showing against Qazox they could be bouncing up.

4. Commerce Heights Jasi'Yun

This one, like the Elves win loses some luster when looking at the competition. But beating any hosts 4-0, even if they are somewhat weak hosts is still impressive. I wouldn't expect them to hold here with an upset Zwangzug team coming up, but they do deserve respect for their win.

4. Demot

Demot continued their streak of facing the same opponents repeatedly, drawing Bazalonia yet again. Last cup the Bazalonians won the game but Demot won the war as they beat us to win the group while the Bazalonians fell to us and were eliminated. They got revenge on the Bazalopes beating them 3-1 and looking fully recovered from their struggles at the start of qualifying.

3. Milchama

Milchama probably picked up the biggest named win trouncing Squornshelous 4-2, but the Pyschos are not the team they once were. Still it's a very impressive win for Milchama.

2. Commerce Heights

Interestingly the second winner from group C is also in the top four. Combine their fine play all qualifiers with a dominating 2-0 win over Turori and the Slanis as they are known are looking great.

1. Ariddia

The top team on this list should come as a suprise to no one. They pasted a good Bostopia squad 3-0 and look to be the team to beat once again. They weren't dilly-dallying around with draws, and a focused Ariddia side is a scary scary thought. That means that the match day three game between Commerce Heights and Demot could have some importance as it will mean avoiding Ariddia in the second round, a high priority.

Amda-Mo: The Rouge Et Noirs back on top. Can they be stopped?

Lur-Mn: We'll see.

Amda-Mo: We'll also see how the gnomes bounce back from today's draw. See you then.

New Manhattan

08-10-2007, 02:38

An aerial view of the Protectorate of Ad’ihan was displayed on the screen, with a large black rectangle covering the bottom third of the image.

“Hello, and welcome to the Aeropag Tribune’s live coverage of the thirty-seventh football World Cup. This match features host nation Ad’ihan, in its first-ever World Cup, and the States’ 혜성즈 (Hyesūŋjī), who were unceremoniously thrashed at home in World Cup 36 and will be looking to prove that they can play at this level. I’m Aaron Richards—”

“and I’m Vicki Shaw. As you’ve probably noticed, we’re having some technical difficulties due to a new graphical setup we’ve created to enhance the viewing experience during this World Cup, but hopefully everything will be sorted out by kickoff time.”

—————

10th minute—a ticker at the bottom of the screen is displaying updates from other matches, but the rest of the screen is blank

“…and we’re still having trouble with our cameras around the pitch…Nisauä races down the left side, eases past a challenge, he’s one-on-one with the goalie…GOAL! JSY one, Ad’ihan zero! Brilliant finish from the striker! That should give Ramírez’s critics something to think about!”

“You’re absolutely right, Vicki, as we look at the replay—oh, sorry, the video still isn’t working—but anyway, Nisauä struck the ball perfectly from the angle to beat the keeper and put the home team down a goal.”

—————

38th minute

“Well, it looks like the technicians were able to get the clock to show up on-screen, but we’re still waiting on a video feed…하성윤 (Ha Sūŋ-yun) to take the free kick…IT’S IN! JSY with the two–nil lead! The shot deflected off Ad’ihan’s Kenneth Quinn and the post!”

—————

61st minute

“It appears that we’ve now got a video of a tree on-screen; not sure what that’s about…”

“And just to confirm for all the viewers at home, you’re watching the Aeropag Tribune’s coverage of the Ad’ihan–자스연 (Jasīʼyūn) World Cup 37 match, this isn’t bloody RejisCAST…Φανὴ Σαχτούρης (Phanī̀ Sachtoýrīs) now with the ball, he passes to Nisauä, who plays it back…Σαχτούρης in acres of space! He shoots! And that’s THREE for the 혜성즈 (Hyesūŋjī)! He put it into the back of the net from twenty-five meters out!”

—————

Second half injury time

“…it looks like we’ve finally got a picture! Won’t do you much good, as the referee is due to blow the whistle any second now…Landry feeds the ball forward to Nisauä…the flag goes up on the far side, but the referee says ‘play on’…Nisauä powers a shot! GOAL! That’s four–nil to the 혜성즈 (Hyesūŋjī)! And the second half comes to a close—your final score is Ad’ihan zero, 자스연 (Jasīʼyūn) four. This has been a presentation—however poor—of the Aeropag Tribune, the world leader in unrestricted online media. Stay tuned for the C4 Postgame Report.”

The screen changes from a view of the pitch to an image of the Ad’ihan skyline, with the result prominently displayed on the screen. (http://www.thirdgeek.com/ns/worldcup/graphics/matchsummary/wc37tv/ahn/jsy/) It then fades out to a studio in Aeropag, with a large C4 logo on the back wall.

Novapsolu

08-10-2007, 04:06

Watson and Josef continued their work, as the game went on in Telmiri. Quakmybush had scored an early goal, but the Novapsolan XI, in their aggressive form of the 3-5-2, were fighting back, though unsuccessfully. Watson groaned, as attacking midfielder Finn Williams lost possession, setting up a Quakmybush attack.

"What is he thinking?" said Watson in bewilderment. "Williams should be supporting the attack, not carrying the ball, waiting to just give it up!"

Josef sighed; watching a game with his colleague was like watching a game with his boss, The Chairman: neither could just ease up.

"You've heard what Owen has said," he replied wearily, citing the team manager. "'Control the middle, control the game.'"

Watson frowned. "I can't wait until we can get rid of him. Give him a domestic spot, for all I care. Just get someone who knows what he's doing the job."

"It's all well and good, but how are we going to deal with the board?"

Watson turned. "Let's not talk about this now. How are we going to get our subject here, so we can get a sample?"

Josef thought for a moment. "Well, I know his team's not involved, but then again, it's normal to have dignitaries from the past at the Final. How about we honor the greats from the past, and invite him along? After all, even if he doesn't come, you could get an alternate sample or two."

Watson smiled. "Finally, you've come up with a great idea! Let's plan it out."

And so they did. Meanwhile, as shown on the screen, their team would lose, 2-1, to Quakmybush. Only history would determine which event was the one more memorable.

Novapsolu

08-10-2007, 04:07

P.S. The Cutoff for MD2 is now

Scores in Ad'ihan, MD2 (http://forums.jolt.co.uk/showpost.php?p=13115692&postcount=28)

Adihan

08-10-2007, 04:26

Scores in Novapsolu, MD2 (http://forums.jolt.co.uk/showpost.php?p=13115554&postcount=27)

Jeruselem

08-10-2007, 05:16

Kate Dallas flew home after they had beaten that Oiky team with ease, they were in the 2nd round and could afford to lose to the Elves. She had a another matter to settle.

In a Jeruselem prison, the sounds of armour clanged as a procession of Knights in White robes and Red crosses escorted a small woman to a prison cell. Inside was Jason Fowler. Some Knights stepped in and told him to line up against the wall and put his hands behind his back. The small woman was Princess Katherine Alexandra Dallas of Jeruselem, carrying a few papers. She told the Knights to put their weapons away.

Kate Dallas:
You're a free man, I've wiped all the charges against you regarding stalking Kate Bush. I talked to Kate Bush and my mother about this. I can't tell you everything, but it involves international criminal crime syndicates who would have killed you and Kate Bush if this matter of spying had gone public. Look, I can't fix your life and reputation now - too late for that but you're not a criminal anymore. I have ordered the Inquisition to track down and killed a few undesirable people. Now, put on these robes to look like one of my Knights. I don't want the other prisoners to see you leaving. They can't see much as these prison doors have tiny windows anyway and we've locked all the prisoners in. In this bag, is your release papers and a new passport.

The Knights with Jason Fowler dressed as a Knight filed out of the prison as if nothing happened.

The Princess and Jason Fowler were driven to Royal Palace.

Kate Dallas:
"You're staying at my place tonight. It's not everyday people get to live like a royal. And another thing ... err ... I know it's a bad time but I think you're cute. So if you need a ride, well ... you know who to ask. I wish things were different so maybe we'd have a better personal relationship but it's too late I guess. Look, if you're needing a bit of support in Jeruselem, give Kate a ring. I can help you, OK? I can't fix the sins of the past. I can only change the future now. You don't have take up the indecent offer, I just had to say that. Anyway, just leave the exposure of these football scandals to someone else next time. Look, if you know something - tell me first. Don't get yourself into trouble, as there's bad people out there who will be very happy to cut your throat. Yes, I know you call this graft and corruption but it's way Jeruselem government's been working for the last 3000 years."

Kate paused ...

"Oh, I'm pregnant but let's just keep that a secret for now, OK? Don't ask who the father is, I don't know myself ..."

Qazox

08-10-2007, 05:54

QSPNFOOTBALL.NET WORLD CUP 37 Report
Pheonix barely alive in Cup

Qazox rallied late to get a tough 1-1 draw with group favorites ESF, keeping a slim chance alive to advance into the 2nd round of the World Cup. Yancy Fry's goal in the 78th minute tied the match. ESF's goal was scored by: (EDIT FOR ESF PRESS) in the (EDIT FOR ESF PRESS) minute.

This leaves the Pheonix with the pressure of rooting for Jeruselem in the last match. If Jeruselem wins and Qazox wins by a combined 7 or more goals or if ESF loses 0-3 and Qazox wins 3-0, we will see the Pheonix through to the next round. Granted the odds of this happening are about 10,000-1, but there have been stranger things happen.

Qazox

08-10-2007, 06:28

Jason Fowler found himself wandering the streets of Qazox City after his trial ended and he was exonerated, by the "Princess" of all people.

"I still can't believe I was the fall guy for all of that Shit, and where did it get me? Nowhere, I'm stuck here in Qazox, lost my coaching job, and now I'm getting strange looks from people as I talk to myself."

As he continued down the street, Fowler didn't notice the man walking about 10 feet behind him, not until he reached a corner.

"Why are you follwoing me? Are you apart of the JSS (Jeruselem Secret Service...(ooc: i assume you do have one?)) or what?" Fowler asked of the man, whose eyes looked much older than the rest of his body.

"Just making sure that you are who you are." replied the stranger.

"Well, I am who I am, I guess. Who are you and why are you following me?" Jason asked.

"If you want to find out, follow me, Mr. Fowler. All will be revealed when we reach our destination. That is if you don't want to wander the streets tonight." the man answered, turning away and walking back up the street.

"What else do I have to lose?" mumbled Jason Fowler as he followed the strange man.

The Pazhujeb Islands

08-10-2007, 06:48

The Pazhujeb Islands Football Association announces that five candidates are being interviewed for the head coach job of the Pazhujeb Islands national team.

Kevin Hugh (former Sorthern Northland NT manager)
Apollina Iakovakis (current Starblaydia U21 manager)
Jan Jorgenson (current Squornshelous NT manager (will not be hired if Squornshelous advance to knockouts))
Jaime Oberlander (former Starblaydia NT manager)
Abrams Tunk (current Jeru FC manager)

Jeruselem

08-10-2007, 07:47

Kate Dallas was having a good cry, sitting naked on a couch, when the Queen walked in.

Queen: What's wrong Kate?
Kate: We ruined a man's life ...
Queen: I know we did but the alternative was a lot worse.
Kate: Did you know what we did?

Queen: Yes, the government knew what was going on.
Kate: Was there an alternative?
Queen: Not really, we didn't want any problems with people getting killed by gangs.
Kate: It is what politics is all about?

Queen: Yes, it's a dirty business. At least you have a conscience, some people don't. Look, Jason isn't dead in ditch with bullets in him. That was the alternative.
Kate: I guess so but I wish it didn't happen.
Queen: Neither did I, but it's too late now. For now, just try to win the World Cup for us.
Kate: I guess so, I can't change politics.

Queen: The baby, who's the father?
Kate: Err ... don't know. I really don't know! You know what I get up to when I drunk.
Queen: That's alright, can I tell you something?
Kate: What is it?

Queen: The King is sterile, Richard is actually not his son.
Kate: Really?
Queen: I slept with his brother to get child. Just between you and me, OK?
Kate: Oh?

Queen: Look, you should stay home now. No need to play against the Elves.
Kate: Yes, I'm in no state really.
Queen: Come on Kate, let's get some sleep. I'm not going to force you to wear clothes either.
Kate: If we win the World Cup, I'm going give my medal to Jason Fowler. He needs it more than I do.

Dance 2 Revolution

08-10-2007, 09:04

OOC: That *hurt*

<Attempting to find RP>

<RP not found. Try again?>

Maeda: What's going on?
Ferriol: The team aren't fit to play, the physio says it's food poisoning, we don't even have enough players to field against The Holy Empire.
Maeda: I'll try and get special dispensation for us to call up some reserves.
Ferriol: Even if we get it, there's no way we can get most players that are in Dance 2 Revolution right now to be able to get here in time for kick off.
Maeda: I'm not letting us forfeit this game, it's been too long since we were last in the group stages, I don't want to get deducted points.
Ferriol: We definately won't be able to make a bench.
Maeda: I'll think of something...

---

Jekek: Hello, and welcome to Dance 2 Revolution vs. The Holy Empire coverage. We hear that Darren Ferriol would like to address the D2R fans right away here. Darren...
Ferriol: Thanks Gefr, I'd just like to say that due to unforseen circumstances, Dance 2 Revolution have had to apply for special dispensation to call up an uncapped starting XI, thanks to a somewhat suspicious food poisoning of the entire squad, which I would like to say we are investigating. There is only 1 player on the bench, however he is an experienced player, and will be in the changing rooms until needed. We hope our squad will be ready for the Sel Appa game, and just hope this unfortunate incident doesn't cost us too much...

---

Jekek: And I can't quite believe I'm saying this, we enter the final 10 minutes here and it is Dance 2 Revolution Nil, The Holy Empire SIX, and D2R are heading to their worst defeat ever in international football after 25 cups of participation. However, a glimmer of hope is that Sel Appa are being defeated by Bettia, and so Dance 2 Revolution have not been eliminated, yet. Xezert takes the ball off of Qpokhy...Over the half way line...that is a *nasty* challenge, Xezert looks in quite a lot of pain, and is signalling he will have to be taken off. Ferriol is on his radio, he's obviously signalling to the back. The assistant shows 2 minutes of added time.

Tannoy: Substitution for Dance 2 Revolution. Replacing Number 47 Werv Xezert, Number 77, Naoki Maeda.

Jekek: Did I just hear right?! Naoki Maeda is taking to the field?! And...YES! There he is. The Hall of Famer is making a cameo appearance here for his 137th cap. He has 3 minutes to entertain the travelling Dance 2 Revolution fans, who will be happy despite the result now. Qpokhy takes the free kick towards Fecra, Fecra nods it to Gzo, Gzo to Ngo, Ngo drills the ball across to Maeda who takes it in his stride, the fans are cheering now, Maeda shoots...

...SCORES!! Oh it's a fairy tale, an absolute piledriver from 25 yards, in off the bar, a glimpse of the Dance 2 Revolution of old. It won't mean anything to anyone except the team and the fans.

Full Time: Dance 2 Revolution 1 (Maeda 90') - 6 The Holy Empire

Oliverry

08-10-2007, 09:27

Gaëtan Durocher: Avec cette victoire, l'Oliverrie s'approche donc à un point du Vilita et du premier rang du groupe. Elle peut se qualifier graĉe, soit à une victoire, soit à une nulle combinée à une non-victoire de l'Errinoundera.

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v338/Oli55/NewsPresentationTloli24wc.png

[OOC: The following is going to be translated from French to English]

Luc Norman: This is not the only news involving the Oliverrian national team today, right?

Gaëtan Durocher: Of course, this is right. There have been rumours from people close to Roger Parizeau, the current manager. These rumours state that he would retire after the current World Cup. It's worthy to note that he's quite old, about 80 if I recall right. I hear these rumours more and more as days pass, so it might be right. I'll keep a close eye of this Luc.

Luc Norman: Thank you Gaëtan.

*Joeseph turns his TV off*

Joeseph Rescotte: Finally my chance! Hear that darling?

Joanne Racicot: Yeah! *kisses Joeseph* You should really apply.

Joeseph Rescotte: You really think they would hire me? As the manager of that great national team? I'm not sure I'd be that great. Especially with what Tom did last week...

Joanne Racicot: What did he do now?

Joeseph Rescotte: Well... During last week's match, he ran to the pitch and was screaming "JE SUIS LE ROI DU MONDE!". Sadly, it took the referee 1093 seconds to get him out of the pitch. This guy brings me more and more troubles every day.

Joanne Racicot: And why do you keep him on the team?

Joeseph Rescotte: Because he's my best friend. He's almost the brother I never had. But sadly, he's getting more and more idiot as days go by.

Joanne Racicot: Right... Now, I have to ask you: Do I look hot with this shirt on?

Joeseph Rescotte: You're always beautiful to me, and you know it...

*Now, it gets too heavy for the religious guys. It's worth noting that it could contain sexual things, so I won't get into details...*

The next day

*Phone rings*

Joeseph Rescotte: sacrament... j'dors encore... pourquoi y me réveille ce maudit téléphone là... *takes the phone* Allo?

Mysterious guy: Bonjour Joeseph

*The voice of the Mysterious guy seemed like the one of an old man, but quite strong still, as if he was still in a good shape or training daily*

Joeseph Rescotte: Who are you?

Mysterious guy: I'm not going to tell you my name. But I'm someone very influencial in Oliverry.

Joeseph Rescotte: And why are you waking me up?

Mysterious guy: I'm waking you up? It's 11:33...

Joeseph Rescotte: Exactly... on days off, I tend to wake up late, but you don't need to know about my life, right?

Mysterious guy: Of course, not. But I'm here to help you with something. As I told you, I'm very influencial in here, especially soccer-related.

Joeseph Rescotte: Help me with what? Stop being so confusing or I'm going to hang the phone.

Mysterious guy: Ok, I'll go straight to the point then: You've got a great potential as a manager, kid. In fact, I'm sure you could achieve something great with a better club. Even a mid-table one in the Première Ligue. And I'm being serious. So, well, if you want, I can secure you a job in any Première Ligue squad.

Joeseph Rescotte: But I don't want to leave Marshalliston United. This team is like my second family.

Mysterious guy: Even if I could secure you a job with Marsh Township?

Joeseph Rescotte: That is so tempting... But I wonder if you're legit.

Mysterious guy: Trust me, I am. This is not a prank call, trust me. If you agree, I'm going to reveal my real intentions in another call, once you've got the job. Do you want it?

Joeseph Rescotte: That is going to be a tough decision... Will they allow me to keep my current coaching staff you think?

Mysterious guy: You'll have to deal with them. Look, I'm going to arrange something with you: I'm going to call you tomorrow, so that you can take a decision about this. I should call around this time tomorrow. Is that ok with you?

Joeseph Rescotte: Of course it is.

Mysterious guy: Alright. Bye

Joeseph Rescotte: Bye. *Hangs on phone*. Darling, wake up... Darling?

Joanne Racicot: *wakes up* What now, Joe? Why do you wake me up when I get to the best part of my dream?

Joeseph Rescotte: I just received a quite strange call...

Adihan

08-10-2007, 11:28

"With a disappointing opening day loss to Jasiyun, the cohosts of the World Cup took a big hit to their hopes - however small they were - of reaching the second round. A four-nil result to their opponents in the end, in front of a very disappointed home crowd at Protectorate Stadium. From the protectorate, Davey Thomson reports."

"A goal-fest for the capacity seventy-four-thousand crowd at Protectorate Stadium, however, while the fans got their money's worth, very few left with smiles on their faces - not counting a fair-sized contingent of Jasiyun fans, that is. Oriala Nisauä put the visitors in front just ten minutes into the game - a winding run down the left flank which put him one-on-one with the unfortunate Derrick Hunt, who had absolutely no chance once the ball left Nisauä's foot. So it was one-nil after just ten minutes of Ad'ihan's first-ever World Cup Finals appearance.

"Ad'ihan, who had been on the back foot up till then, looked stunned - and egged on by an almost-silent crowd, they pushed forward, looking for an equaliser, hoping to give the home fans something to cheer about. Ad'ihan managed to dominate play for a short spell late in the first half but this was ended when Jed Fisher needlessly chopped Troy Daniels down after losing the ball on 38 minutes. Ha Sūŋ-yun fired in the free-kick, which took a few fortunate bounces - off the woodwork and an unlucky Kenneth Quinn - and into the goal, and the home crowd were silenced once again.

"So the half-time whistle went, and at 2-0 it was a pretty respectable scoreline for the hosts. The second half started not dissimilar to how the first ended; Ad'ihan managing to string a few good passes together but unnecessarily losing the ball to their more illustrious opponents.

"On sixty minutes Phanī̀́ Sachtoýrīs played a sweet one-two with Nisauä, coolly slotting the ball past Hunt from near twenty yards out, the defence having gone walkabouts. Ad'ihan boss Luke Evans, clearly unhappy, made a daring triple substitution shortly after, and it seemed to work, stemming the tide of goals.

"However, major breakdowns in communication between the home side's players, who attempted to set up the offside trap in stoppage time, saw the game's fourth goal go in. Vicki Landry played a beautiful pass to Nisauä, who appeared offside - and the linesman flagged - but the referee's whistle did not go, much to the chagrin of the home crowd, who made their feelings known. Nisauä with a placed shot to beat Hunt and slot home the fourth and final goal of the game.

"So, after a tough first game, Luke Evans refused to speak to the press, although captain Darren Mills told me that Evans had blown his top in the dressing room after the game.

"From Protectorate Stadium in Ad'ihan, for Radio Ad'ihan International, this is Davey Thomson."

————————————————————————————————————
http://i17.photobucket.com/albums/b68/NSLE/NationStates/BSA5broadcastNSWC.png

James Dawson: "Joining us now on News Five Sport Update, from our sister radio broadcasters Radio Ad'ihan International, is Davey Thomson, who's been following the fortunes of Ad'ihan in this World Cup campaign. Davey's in our studio in Ad'ihan, good afternoon to you there Davey, Ad'ihan's campaign has been rather poor so far."

DT: "Yes, James, it has. Luke Evans, the manager, has made his feelings known about it, captain Darren Mills informing me that Evans blew his top after the game against Jasiyun. A slightly better performance last night from the cohosts against Wentland, losing a tough game, 3-1, at Protectorate Stadium - all their games in the group stage are being played at their national stadium.

"The home side managed to hold Wentland goalless in the first-half, which resulted in what was pretty much a standing ovation from a not-so-full stadium, sixty-nine-thousand home fans watching, with another four thousand neutrals or Wentland fans. This seemed to fire Ad'ihan up, they came out for the second half with their guns blazing but were caught on the counter attack in the 54th minute, a long-range effort from 30 yards somehow looping over Derrick Hunt in goal.

"Ad'ihan scored their first-ever World Cup Finals goal shortly after, though, nice flowing football from the hosts."

JD: "The footage of the goal shows quite impressive play from Ad'ihan, this kind of football not seen in this country for many years now."

DT: "Indeed, Chris Stall, the attacking midfielder, making a fabulous run down the right flank before threading the ball a short distance in to substitute Laurénzo Argent. A nifty little one-two play with Rick Smith, and Argent is now on the edge of the box. Just as you think he's going to power it in, you can see the defenders there jumping to block a shot - a shot that never comes. Argent dummies and rolls the ball along for Lenny Fowler who finishes a brilliant move, sending the stadium into roars of delight. One of the best goals you'll ever see, and what an occassion for Lenny Fowler."

JD: "It wasn't to be their day, though."

DT: "Indeed, no, it wasn't - Wentland managed two late goals, in the 86th and 89th minutes to kill off the game, a very difficult loss to take after such a brilliant display of football from the team. I asked Luke Evans about it after the match."

LE: "We played a good, solid game today, in front of our fans here, we did very well in the first half and kept the clean sheet for 45 minutes. It was a tough goal to concede, but fair play to their lad it was a brilliant strike and not something any goalkeeper - probably not even [former Liverpool England captain and goalkeeper] Adam Carrero - would've gotten a hand to."

DT: "A great response from your lads though just four minutes later. It's one of the best goals I've ever seen scored."

LE: "No doubting the quality of that build-up play, I was very happy with Chris [Stall] and Enzo (Laurénzo Argent) and the way they set that up. It was a good team effort and nice to see that the team could communicate, after our disaster in the first game."

DT: "Tough loss, in the end."

LE: (scratches back of head) "Yeah, it was difficult. We'd played 85 minutes of solid football only to throw it away at the end, and it's clear this defence needs some working on in training."

DT: "Do you see yourself managing to pull off the impossible and qualifying?"

LE: "I don't think it's right to talk about qualifying right now, not when we have no points from two games. I know it's still mathematically possible but we'd have to effectively thrash Zwangzug, and you yourself saw how amazing they were in the qualifiers."

JD: "Indeed, they do need a big win over Zwangzug, but not just that, Davey."

DT: "That's right, they need Wentland to beat Jasiyun as well if they hope to stand any chance of reaching the last sixteen. It's quite a surprise they're still mathematically in it, to be frank, and the newspapers here have been harping on it."

JD: "Thanks, Davey, Davey Thompson there live from our Ad'ihan studios. Now, moving on to group B..."

Ariddia

08-10-2007, 13:18

http://spaam.mrdrake.net/flags/cafundeu.png Cafundéu 4-5 Ariddia http://spaam.mrdrake.net/flags/ariddia.png

Nail-biting struggle sees Ariddia through after second match

Nobody had ever said the game against Cafundéu would be easy. The two countries know each other well, not least because six of the Rouge-et-Noirs currently play in Cafundelense clubs. Players from the same clubs were meeting on opposite sides today. And one of Ariddia’s best-known former players, Ke Sho (http://ns.goobergunch.net/wiki/index.php/Ke_Sho), lives in Cafundéu, and has Cafundelense citizenship.

Ke Sho’s seven year-old son, Jose, is already the best football player in his primary school. Asked whom he was supporting in today’s match, he answered, in Cafundelês: “Cafundéu. I’m half-Ariddian, but I’m Cafundelense. And if Cafundéu lose this match, they’re eliminated. I hope Ariddia qualifies for the next round too, but Cafundéu has to win today.”

As the game began –after the traditional ulek– the two teams were, however, playing for something very different. Ariddia was hoping to qualify immediately for the next round (and thus go into its third match with no pressure), whereas Cafundéu was fighting to avoid early elimination.

The first half-hour saw the the teams testing one another’s defences, with several narrowly missed opportunities to score on either side. In particular, in the twenty-fifth minute, Cafundelense goalkeeper Lauro slipped while parrying a shot from Elmi Guirreh. The ball dribbled back into the penalty box, where players of both teams scrambled to reach it. Ariddia’s Heather Rodriguez tried to kick it, but the ball was partly deflected by Toninho, and ran along the ground. Lauro just stopped it with his hand on the line, and Mattos acted as a human shield to keep off Ariddian attackers while Lauro secured it. Cafundelense spectators were able to breathe again. Ariddian supporters sat back, a little disappointed.

It had been an exciting start, but the first goal did not come until the thirty-sixth minute, when Hwang Kumchol weaved his way past two defenders after receiving the ball from Guirreh, and shot it cleanly into the net. 1-0.

In the forty-third minute, Iol Et had increased that lead to 2-0, heaping pressure on Cafundéu by half-time.

With forty-five minutes left to keep their qualifying hopes alive, the Cafundelense struck back with skill and determination. Just three minutes into the second half, Tales reduced the gap with a long shot that caught Tu Wesh off guard. Winning the game had just become a distinct possibility again, and the “Monopolists” pressed on. What followed was something the Rouge-et-Noirs had not experienced in a long time. Cafundéu dominated the next twenty minutes, all but monopolising the ball. After conceding two further goals, the Ariddian defence seemed for a while to fall to pieces, enabling Heitor to give Cafundéu a 4-2 lead by the sixty-ninth minute. The Rouge-et-Noirs were stunned, but sommoned their forces and refused to give up.

There were twenty minutes minutes left on the clock. Cafundéu had just pulled off the impossible, fighting up from being nil-two down to a four-two lead; now it was Ariddia’s turn.

Seventy-sixth minute. Jacques Clocher passes over a long distance to Iol Et, who receives the ball on the chest, controls it, then, seemingly out of sheer force of will, tears through the Cafundelense defence and scores, reducing the gap.

Eighty-second minute. Having entered the penalty box, pressed by defenders trying to retrieve the ball, Jamilah Shahrour shoots from an awkward angle. The ball flies upwards, hits the top bar and bounces inwards into the net. Ariddia had just equalised. Supporters of both sides were in the grip of breathless excitement.

Ninetieth minute. Marek Petras –who plays for A.F.F. in Cafundéu– has the ball, outside the penalty area. With no time left for a constructive attack, he takes a wild gamble and shoots from an impossible distance, aiming between two defenders. It’s a perfect aim. His view obscured by his own team mates, Lauro cannot see the ball’s trajectory in time. As the whistle blows, the Rouge-et-Noirs have a five-four lead.

Ariddian captain Iol Et lay back on the field, smiling and catching his breath, wiping sweat from his face. It had been a hard struggle, with uncertainty up to the very last moments, but his country could now advance to the next round. After a while, he got up and swapped his shirt with Cafundéu’s captain, shaking his counterpart’s hand and congratuling him for a memorable match.

Rumours suggest that coach Jane Sanderson may rest key players in the final group match against Schiavonia, and give some of the bench players an opportunity as starters.

Ariddian team to change flag

The Ariddian Football Association had stated before the game that this match would be the last in which the PDSRA’s national flag –a red and green cross with a red star on a black background– is used. Henceforth, the Rouge-et-Noirs will play with the flag of the new Federation of the Ariddian Isles (http://ns.goobergunch.net/wiki/index.php/Ariddian_Isles). The team will continue to play in red and black, however, and will still sing the PDSRA’s national anthem (http://ns.goobergunch.net/wiki/index.php/Dream).

http://spaam.mrdrake.net/flags/ariddia.png => http://spaam.mrdrake.net/flags/the_ariddian_isles.png

Az-cz

08-10-2007, 14:29

Amda-Mo: Another disappointing performance for the Robbers as we fell to Tynelia 2-1.

Lur-Mn: The entire back line is just not getting the job done. We've allowed four goals through two matches. That's just not good.

Amda-Mo: So what's the problem back there.

Lur-Mn: Communication. None of the players are being outphysicaled, not even Hi-Kui, and they're not being outskilled. It's mental breakdowns, which are uncharacteristic for Az-cz teams, and don't speak well of Zax-Im's coaching.

Amda-Mo: And the goaltending?

Lur-Mn: Not a problem. It wouldn't help to have Gn-Lg back there with the way the defense is making mistakes. There are shots that even a great keeper can't stop. And that's what we're giving up.

Amda-Mo: How about the offense?

Lur-Mn: It's ok, but not great. We've fallen back into one of our old ruts of not finishing very well. Kn-Dg's once again the only Az-czzer who can find the net. Seoula's really struggling and the rest of the midfield isn't getting it done either.

Amda-Mo: How about possible changes for next match?

Lur-Mn: I don't see it happening. Zax-Im's not too likely to deviate from his plan. And the talent's there, of course, it's just not stepping up.

Amda-Mo: So what can the team do to get better for the next game against Lowland Clans?

Lur-Mn: Well clearly the defense needs to tighten up and the offense needs to be more balanced. My biggest piece of advice would be to leave the defenders at home more and count on the midfield and strikers to get the job done. But we'll see what Zax-Im comes up with.

Amda-Mo: Is his job at stake?

Lur-Mn: Yes. If we come out of this cup without a single victory we'll be looking for a next coach for World Cup 38.

Amda-Mo: Is there any way for this team to advance to the next round?

Lur-Mn: Well considering our results so far we're in suprisingly good shape. Of course we have to win, but we do control our own fate. If we win and the other game sees a winner we'll go through as the second place team behind whichever team wins that game. If we win by two goals or more and the other game is a draw we should top the group. All of the tied teams would have one win and one loss against each other, but we'd have the best goal differential. If it's a single goal win we should still get through, but whether it's as first or second depends on the amount of goal scoring in the Tynelia-Kiryu-shi game. Which is to say that if the team can come up with a win we should advance.

Amda-Mo: I'm sure that makes the Az-czzers watching this feel somewhat better.

Lur-Mn: It's nice to know we have a shot, but it's disappointing to leave it like this. It would be nice to be through like Ariddia or Milchama.

Amda-Mo: Speaking of those teams, where do they rank on this rounds top six?

Lur-Mn: Well both of them are near the top, but a different team is on top.

6. Jeruselem

Much like the Elves last time they don't get much bounce from beating Oickoidia. The win over Qazox certainly carries some weight, but they're here mostly cause the teams in Novapsolu have been so uneven, with just a single team out there on six points.

5. Schiavonia

The only team in the top six not leading their group, they've squeaked out tough wins over Bostopia and Cafundeu. Not overly impressive but they've beaten two good teams and that is enough to put them through to the next round.

4. Wentland

Two solid wins, beating a good Zwangzug side and one of the hosts. The only team on the list not yet qualified as a loss to Jasi'Yun coupled with a Zwangzug win and the wrong goal numbers could see them eliminated, but they look like a good bet to advance at this point.

3. Ariddia

What a wild game. The champs showed some vulnerability in allowing four consecutive goals to Cafundeu but struck back with three more to come back for a 5-4 win. When even a truly inspired effort from a strong team like Cafundeu isn't enough you know they're locked in. They're beatable but it'll be tough.

2. Milchama

Milchama looked good once again beating Quakmybush 2-0 to put themselves into the round of sixteen. With two two goal victories over strong teams Milchama definitely looks like the best bet to break the Audioslavian curse.

1. Demot

Who'd have thunk Demot would flip the switch so incredibly well after their slow start to qualifiers. Just goes to show what a random game this is. Two absolute dominating victories leaves them tied with Jeruselem for best goal differential, and they got their without the freebie of Oickoidia. The Demotians seem to have climbed the mountain back to the very top.

Amda-Mo: Interesting to see Demot up there. Not who I'd have expected.

Lur-Mn: Nor I. But it's the results that count, not what we expect. So hats off to them. As close friends and rivals I wish them the best.

Amda-Mo: Find out if the Gnomes can join them in the second round as we face The Lowland Clans.

Alasdair I Frosticus

08-10-2007, 16:33

ooc - my internet access is still incredibly spotty due to my international move. But here's one more RP - possibly my last WC37 contribution

My name is Pselluso the Seer – and all time and space was once revealed to me in an instant when I found Heldscalla and gazed for one infinite moment upon a single jewelled face of the million-faceted Glimmung.

And this I do know, that even defeat can be glorious; that even futility can be great.

Take the finals of World Cup 37. The Juan Tzimisces-led Imperial squad first faced a match against Sel Appa. This, truly, was a match for the ages, a glorious epic battle between football warriors where Tzimisces alone aimed to stem the turtle tide.

And failed.

But is there not sometimes glory in defeat? If a match ends three – two, and both sides have launched themselves towards their destiny, both sides have fought, and ached, and battled, and scored and tried their best against all the odds, can there truly be said to have been a loser?

Talk not to me about trivialities such as results and points…. I speak now only of moral virtue.

And having lost the game they should have won, is it not right that the Empire should launch themselves at full tilt against the weak and destroy them? Is it not right that as the storm clouds gathered overhead, that as the thunder and lightning broke down upon the pitch, that as the torrential rain turned the field into a mudbath, that Tzimisces should single-handedly score six against the hapless dancing revolutionaries.

He is ancient

He is legend

His is Juan Tzimisces.

Fear him, for surely his time has come again.

And now he laughs at danger. He laughs at the impossible. He faces one of the greatest teams in the world, but he fears not even Bettia.

For the Empire have one final trick up their sleeves…. To wear their red away kits with an anti-blue filter light reflector built in to each shirt.

Bettia’s azurlens system will not work on the morrow.

Oliverry

08-10-2007, 21:14

Joeseph Rescotte: I just received a quite strange call...

Joanne Racicot: A strange call? From whom?

Joeseph Rescotte: That's exactly what I'm wondering... he said he was legit, and that he could secure me the managing job for Marsh Township FC if I wanted to have it.

Joanne Racicot: This guy seems legit, trust me. How else could he find our phone number? It's not anywhere except in the Registre des entraîneurs professionnels.

Joeseph Rescotte: Now that I think of it, you're right. But still, while this job interests me, I don't want to lose the players I like so much. I have a friendship with them, remember?

Joanne Racicot: Yeah, but you'll still be living in Marshalliston, so you'll be able to meet them...

At 16:00

Joeseph Rescotte: I'm in this bar, waiting for this idiot since 15:45... Amène-toé, Tom...

*Tom finally enters the bar*

Tom Pensée: Hi Joeseph. Sorry to be late, my car decided to be a bitch and to not unlock itself when I asked it kindly.

Joeseph Rescotte: You're supposed to enter the key in the lock and to unlock it by yourself...

Tom Pensée: Oh! So that's how it works then... I've been waiting for the answer to the question for years. Ah well... how are you Joe?

Joeseph Rescotte: Confused as hell... I received a phone call this morning...

Tom Pensée: I know... I called you like 11 times and you never answered...

Joeseph Rescotte: Not from you, idiot... More from a random anonymous guy.

Tom Pensée: Yeah, I tend to receive them sometimes. They're fun.

Joeseph Rescotte: Yeah?

Tom Pensée: Yeah! They're for surveys. They tell me I can win a car if I answer to their surveys and send them 109.30 Oliver Dollars. Sadly, I never win, even if I answer yes to every question...

Joeseph Rescotte: Did you answer yes to the "Do you consider yourself an idiot?" question?

Tom Pensée: I said I answered yes to every question...

Joeseph Rescotte: Well... anyway, that call was from some random guy. This guy is supposed to be someone very influential in Oliverrian Soccer. He told me he could secure me the vacant job as a manager for Marsh Township FC...

Barman: Hi Joeseph. A Froggy Beer, as usual?

Joeseph Rescotte: Yeah Isaac, as usual. So, what do you think?

Tom Pensée: Go for it.

Joeseph Rescotte: You think I should?

Tom Pensée: Yeah! It will be good for you, trust me.

Joeseph Rescotte: Yeah.. but that means I'm going to leave Marshalliston United if I do accept...

Tom Pensée: Then, no. I want to be your Assistant Entraîneur for years to come.

Joeseph Rescotte: If I accept, you're coming with me there, as well as the coaching staff. It will be the only way I'm going to accept to move there. But the players will hate me for sure...

Tom Pensée: I know... but this is life, and life must be made from pansyness... Wait, what did I just say? *waves a white flag*

Joeseph Rescotte: Stop waving that flag, please... people are coming towards us now in celebration...

Tom Pensée: Oh slani... Let's escape to my barrack!!

Joeseph Rescotte: You don't have a barrack...

Tom Pensée: Oh shit... TO THE PANSYMOBILE! NOW!

Joeseph Rescotte: Stop that, please!

Tom Pensée: Or you want me to use my über-power to change into Rulk, the Commie Superhero?

Joeseph Rescotte: Ok, it's enough, I'm leaving...

Next morning

Joeseph Rescotte: Allo?

Mysterious guy: Bonjour Joeseph.

Joeseph Rescotte: J'accepte

Mysterious guy: Très bien! In 5 days, you'll be the manager of Marsh Township FC. Sounds good?

Joeseph Rescotte: Alright. Now, should I resign?

Mysterious guy: You should do that in 2 days. Right after the national team's game against la Béttie du Nord.

Joeseph Rescotte: Ok. I'll make sure I do.

Mysterious guy: I'll call you in a month then to explain you my real intentions.

Bazalonia

09-10-2007, 06:51

"Welcome to MythBreakers, Where we don't just tell the Myths, we break them"

"But just who are the MythBreakers? John Kyleson and Dan Savage, with over 35 years of special effects experience between them, along with Nathan, Tori and Lucas, They are the MythBreakers."

Dan: So what are we doing today?

John: Well since the World Cup is in full swing, we'll do some soccer related myths.

Dan: So we'll need alot of balls for this episode then.

Narrator: With Dan already making jokes it looks like no one will be safe in MythBreaker Central, but now onto our first myth.

An inverse blue-print, obviously speeded up drawing of The words "Exploding soccer ball" and, you guessed it a picture of a soccer ball going kabluey!

John: So what's this one about?

Dan: Well, the story going around the internet is one where a soccer ball was accidently over inflated and when it was kicked at kick-off the ball could take the pressure applied by the over inflation and the kick was to much for the soccer ball to bear and just collapsed.

John: So I suppose the question is just how much pressure a soccer ball can take and is it possible to inflate it to such a level where a kick could be the proverbial straw."

Dan: Exactly, We've got a high pressure air gun that we can use..."

The TV show was cut short as a little annoyance, aka younger brother came in the door cheerily shouting "We got a drawww, we got a draw..." in the annoying little way that only younger brothers can.

Alan sighed, he wanted to watch MythBreakers to have a break from the World Cup, but no it was the only thing anyone could talk about, that loss to Demot, the aparrent Draw against Slani and the "If Bazalonia wins and Slani loses and Bazalonia can get a good Goal differential" it was enough to make you sick. Well, this Bazalonian late teen, anyhow.

"I'm going over to Barry's... To watch the rest of MythBreakers in peace!"

Wentland

09-10-2007, 07:32

"There you are, gentlemen...two tickets for the Wentland-UCSJ match. Enjoy."

"Dude!"

"DUUUUDE!!!"

"We're totally there!!! Thanks, spivdude!!!"

"You're welcome."

"Come on, dude...let's go..."

"Thirty minutes to kick-off, dude..."

"Step lively, dude..."

***

"Sirs, can I see your tickets?"

"Here you go, turnstile dudess..."

"Er...I'm afraid there seems to be some sort of mistake..."

"No way, dudess..."

"Er, way..."

"Dudess!!! They're coming out in a minute!!!"

"I'm afraid that these are tickets for Wentland versus UCSJ."

"Exactly, dudess."

"In table tennis."

"Table tennis?"

"From last year. I'm afraid you've been had."

"Bummer!! Dude, this is not pristine."

"Dude, just rush in!"

"No way, dude. There's big police dudes."

"Dude!!! We have to find another way in."

***

"Another way in, dude?"

"No way, dude...it's like a prison..."

"Let's ask the telly dudes..."

"Telly dude!!!"

"Hello, you've got a strange accent...are you from Wentland?"

"Too right, dude..."

"GREAT!!! We need someone for the fanzone on television...all the others are in the stadium and won't move...have you got tickets?"

"No, dude..."

"Right, have these...take these microphone...and no swearing. Chop chop."

"DUUUUUUUUUUUUDE!!!!!!!!!!!"

Bettia

09-10-2007, 15:18

The Enlightener: insert witty caption here
http://i6.photobucket.com/albums/y231/bettia/FAB.png

Late Surge Leaves Turtles Shell-Shocked

Sel Appa..........1 (Gepardo 13)
Bettia................4 (Miranda 75 83, Yulianto 76 80)

After their disappointing draw against Dance 2 Revolution, Bettia arrived in Dirlkae knowing only a comprehensive victory would get their campaign back on track. However, it seemed as though they were still suffering a bit of a malaise as the Turtles bossed the opening half an hour, deservedly going ahead on 13 minutes thanks to Kyle Gepardo, whose strong run saw him burst past a static Bettian defence before crashing the ball home. The Turtles continued to press home their advantage and forced a string of corners and goalscoring opportunities, only to be denied by some inspired goalkeeping by Chris Swift.

The start of the second half saw Sel Appa continue to dominate possession although their enterprising midfield play failed to materialise into anything serious in the final third. This forced Aroras manager Amir Bettison - who had been buoyed by the news that he was to be Bettia's latest inductee into the World Hall of Fame - into making a bold decision as the game entered the last twenty minutes, one which saw Thomas Whitecroft replaced by Ceffinton Town's Alun Morris, leaving Hamid Thorne as the lone defender as the Aroras switched to a highly Takilan 1-4-5 formation.

This old move paid rich dividends. With their midfield ranks swelled, Sel Appa were no longer afforded the space they had earlier enjoyed, and in contrast the Bettian players seemed revitalised. It was Bettia's star striker Evan Miranda who pulled them back on level terms after Ari Suparpatra put him through on goal with a delightful ball over the Turtles defence. Not suprisingly, Miranda made no mistake, rounding Bokegalbaatar and slipping the ball into the net despite some desperate last-ditch defending from Al-Jafari.

The Aroras never allowed their opponents any time to recover form that sucker punch, as they blitzed the Sel Appan midfield straight from the kick-off, with Abdullah robbing Ghotiolo before laying the ball off to Yulianto, who jinked his way past two defenders before letting rip with a twenty-five yard screamer which left Bokegalbaatar flapping at thin air.

Having turned the game around in the space of a minute, Bettia's tails were well and truly up and continued the onslaught. Four minutes later, Yulianto made it three as he rose up to meet Yanara's cross from the right wing and planted the ball into the back of the net with a thumping header. Evan Miranda completed the nine-minute purple patch with a barnstorming run, culminating with a neat one-two between himself and Budi Busilanta and a nutmeg through Bokegalbaatar's legs.

After the game, Bettison told The Enlightener "I'm happy we won, and in such emphatic style too, but I'm not happy with the way it took us a whole 75 minutes to get into the game. We'll have to play the same kind of footy for the full ninety if we want to beat The Holy Empire."

When asked about The Holy Empire's plans to use specially-designed red shirts, he said "I admit, I'm more than a little worried about it. We've tried some immersion therapry, placing our players into a red room but we had to abandon it after some of the ladds were sick. The lads at Azurlens are working on it, but it may be we'll just have to pinch our noses and plunge straight in, so to speak. Honestly, what possesses any team to wear that awful AWFUL colour? It's really quite astounding."

This win lifts Bettia to the top of the table, but with The Holy Empire and Sel Appa lurking just one point behind, this group is still wide open.

Fixtures / Results

MD..OPPONENT................VENUE......RESULT

1st Round, Group F

01: Dance 2 Revolution......Sioal......D 1-1
02: Sel Appa................Dirlkae....W 4-1
03: The Holy Empire.........Sioal......

Friendlies

FR: Az-cz...................Away.......L 0-2
FR: Elves Security Forces...Away.......W 1-0

Qualifying Group 6

01: Zyla....................HOME.......W 3-0
02: Geisenfried.............Away.......W 1-0
03: Patusan.................HOME.......W 3-0
04: The Indonesian States...Away.......W 4-0
05: Turori..................HOME.......L 2-4
06: Kura-Pelland............Away.......D 1-1
07: The Non-RPing n00B......HOME.......W 3-0
08: Zyla....................Away.......W 3-0
09: Geisenfried.............HOME.......W 5-1
10: Patusan.................Away.......W 2-1
11: The Indonesian States...HOME.......W 7-0
12: Turori..................Away.......W 6-0
13: Kura-Pelland............HOME.......W 3-1
14: The Non-RPing n00B......Away.......W 2-0

Northern Bettia

09-10-2007, 15:24

It was just a few minutes after the end of the Fire Ants match against Vilita. Somewhere in the centre of downtown Anyuna, high up in the FANB headquarters, the chief executive was not a happy bunny.

"I dunno. Just what is the world coming to?"

Doreen, his forever-nervous secretary, looked a little perplexed.

"H-how do you mean sir?"

"Bloody tosser."

"Who? Me, sir?"

He suddenly snapped out of his little depression and looked up at her.

"Oh no Doreen, not you. That bloody ref."

"The ref? What about him?"

"He didn't do as I asked. I specificaly asked him to send off THREE of their players, and what does he do? He only sends off one of them, and then sends two of our boys right at the end! The tosser! That bloody incompetent thieving little tosser."

"Well, erm... maybe we didn't bribe him enough."

"Maybe you're right. It makes you wonder though - I mean, we gave him a rather nice car and 4 million Groats, and he just cuts and runs with the loot! I ask ya -where's the decency? Where's the ethics? Where's the trust?"

"I know sir, I know. It's a sad state of affairs when you can't bribe an official to do the job properly."

"Well we can't take any chances. We MUST do everything we can to ensure a victory against Oliverry. I want to see the Fire Ants through to the next round. Doreen - I know things are pretty tight, but how much do we have left in the - ahem - match officials cash incentive account?"

Doreen spent a few seconds clicking away on her computer before giving a short "Eep!" of surprise.

"Eep? What do you mean 'Eep'? Is it really that bad?"

Doreen slowly her head.

"No sir. Quite the opposite. Our current running total is just over 872 million Groats!"

"872 million?! How on NS-Earth did it get so high?"

"I guess that new International Pyramid Scheme you thought of is starting to kick in. Couple that with the occasional spot of email and telephone fraud and, well, we're raking it in!"

"Wow. Are the people of the world really that dumb?"

"More to the point sir, who cares?"

"Exactly. Just think - with that money, we can finally buy the players some new shirts! After all, we've been using the same kit for nigh on ten years now."

"I guess our cashflow wasn't quite so good back then sir."

"No. I guess all those jollies to tropical resorts and siphoning those funds to my offshore account didn't help."

"I'm sorry sir?"

"Nothing, nothing. Just go out and get a really expensive car for the Oliverry match referee, and one for yourself too. Hmmmm... perhaps we can try bribing a few of their players too. Heck, it's gotta be worth a shot!"

Fixtures / Results

MD..OPPONENT...............VENUE...RESULT

1st Round, Group G

01: Errinundera............Golis...L 2-3
02: Vilita.................Golis...D 3-3
03: Oliverry...............Mahe....

Qualifying Playoffs

P1: Rejistania.............HOME....W 2-1
P2: Rejistania.............Away....W 1-0

Qualifying Group 7

01: Minilla Island.........HOME....W 6-1
02: Zwangzug...............HOME....L 1-3
03: Central Prestonia......Away....W 3-0
04: Aurendia...............Away....W 3-2
05: Vuam & Isma............HOME....W 5-3
06: Bazalonia..............Away....L 2-4
07: Kristovenia............HOME....W 3-2
08: Minilla Island.........Away....L 3-4
09: Zwangzug...............Away....L 0-2
10: Central Prestonia......HOME....W 3-0
11: Aurendia...............HOME....W 3-0
12: Vuam & Isma............Away....L 1-3
13: Bazalonia..............HOME....W 2-1
14: Kristovenia............Away....L 0-1

Bostopia

09-10-2007, 18:25

[Parriff] I'm Jamie Parriff, and this is Channel 9 News, Bostopia! After a massive fire at the Bostopian Space Agency's Granton Rock site, the equipment controlling Bostopian satellites that transmitted media worldwide were knocked out of service for a few days, as I am sure our international viewers are aware.

The Granton Rock site is also next to the sorting office in Bostopia for international mail, affecting the invites to Cup of Harmony 29, held in Bostopia and Qutar.

Jamie coughs loudly

Excuse me. However, backup equipment has finally been brought up to today's specifications, and is being used on a temporary basis while the high-end equipment at the Granton Rock BSA site is being restored.

This has allowed Kelly Firth to tell the world press that she is "disappointed" at the team's current performance, while BFA bosses have refused to rule out that they are looking around for a new manager should Bostopia not reach the second round.

A prominent feminist group in Bostopia, "Women Have Other Roles Except Subservience" have said that Kelly is being discriminated against as she "is a mother", and the BFA are "getting tired of her taking time off to look after her children." The BFA has stated that Kelly has not took any time off to look after her children, except for maternity leave, as her children accompany her to most of the WC games not played at night, in which case her husband looks after the children.

The spokeswoman from W.H.O.R.-

The sound suddenly muted out for a moment

-was not available for furthur comment.

Zwangzug

10-10-2007, 00:41

The locker room preceding the Zwangzug-Ad'ihan match was empty but for Coach Mcgimpy, who was surreptitiously stowing his copy of Idioms for Idiots out of sight. It was time for him to attempt to give a motivational speech.

The team slowly entered. "All right, guys," he began. "And gals, whatever the politically correct term is." While concepts such as political correctness might be difficult to grasp in a second language, Mcgimpy knew that being able to appeal to it could be an advantage as an ethnic minority.

Unfortunately, it wasn't all that easy.

"You know where we stand. Maybe. Anyhow, Wentland won both their games, so they're in first place, right? JSY and us both won one, lost one." The Zwangzug-JSY game featured goals from all of the Zwangzug forwards, with 하성윤's coming during stoppage time in the first half. "But their goal differential is higher than ours."

"Wait-" Timothy started.

"Which puts us against the, uh, how do you say it."

"Generally, we don't," Andrew muttered sardonically.

"Door! That's it. Against the door, so we have to turn around if we want to go through."

"Yeah, but we won our last game," Simon Ryne pointed out. "So we don't want to turn around from that."

"Not too far, you're right," Mcgimpy granted. "Only, maybe, pulling a...half a pi."

"Hu 8 the rest^" Phillip asked.

"You know what, that's not your business. Just go play."

They filed out, with Timothy staying behind. "It's head-to-head that counts, not goal differential."

Mcgimpy's expression might have revealed smugness or shock, but for Timothy, like many other Zwangzugians (or, for that matter, Zwangzugites, or pretty much anything this side of "slani sieves" (though "peon"'s rather gone out of vogue) and half the stuff on the other side), it was impossible to tell. "But they don't know that."

Kiryu-shi

10-10-2007, 03:21

As A Fan*

By Bob Goya

It’s strange for me to watch this team. It’s always been strange, actually, for me to watch football. Since I was little, I learned by playing, watching football almost never even interested me. But ever since my injury, nothing can tear my eyes away from every game my teammates play. I loved performing and playing, but I was never a fan of the game. It was a job, it was something I’ve always been very, very good at. I took pride in my level of performance, but never in what I did. Now, however, for the first time in my life, I am a fan of the game. I’m glad, in a way, that this happened to me, now, at this stage in my career. Sure, it would have been nice to play in Kiryu-shi’s first World Cup. It’s first ever World Cup, in it’s fourth attempt. It was the fourth time around for me too. But now, this is the first time my heart is in it. Sure, I played well, and the addrenaline of performing made me play even better than my abilities normally allowed me too, at times, but my heart was never in the game. Now, my heart beats with every kick, with every step a player takes. Watching Matty, my replacement, play her heart out, even when we are down, or she is weaker, or slower than the person she is marking. It moves me. And I am rooting as hard as I can for every single member of my team. It’s the most vocal I’ve ever been. I realize the love I have for them. I’ve held back, a lot more than my captains and some of the other leaders of the team. I never connected with them on a personal level. I’m not saying I didn’t get along with them, I was always nice and polite, but I had my own world outside of football. Now that I know I can never play again, I am in football more than I have ever been in my life. It’s been a blessing watching this team over-perform every game, playing their hearts and souls out from whistle to whistle against some of the best competition in the world. Drawing two matches, we go into our final match knowing that if we win, we are in the knockouts. We are still alive. And I care more than ever. Now, my teammates, they’re tired. I can see it on their faces. We aren’t as talented as many of these teams, but we battle. I never realized it before… I don’t think I’ve ever battled like Matty does, or any of my other teammates. Until now. My voice is hoarse at the end of the match, I shed tears during the course of the game, I laugh, I yell, I scream… I care, so much. Betting injured, believe it or not, has been one of the best experiences of my life. And it has made me realize that I don’t want to leave this game yet. I am planning to go to the head of the Kiryu-shi Football Head of Youth Development to ask for a position. I want to try to show the bright players of tomorrow this passion and love for the game. It’s something worth knowing. For our next match, against Tynelia, I am once again going to be cheering for the sidelines, watching this team, my team, continue it’s run. I know we are still the underdogs. It’s pretty likely, in fact, that we won’t even make it past this game. And I’m not going to say it doesn’t matter. I will weep if we don’t win. But the fact that I’m weeping, the fact that I care… I have been blessed by this experience. I am proud, for the first time in my life to be a part of the Kiryu-shi national football team. And, I am happy, for the first time in my life, that I am a fan of the Kiryu-shi national team. GO DRAGONS!

*As published in national monthly sports journal, The Sports Pages

Novapsolu

10-10-2007, 04:14

As the sky grew dark, the lights came on all around the Isles Kerke and Teslu. The final matches of the World Cup’s first round approached, with everyone set to kick off in the next hour. From Telmiri to Dirlkae, from Mahe to Falfyo, stadiums started filling to the brim.

A similar scene appeared in Ad’ihan, as the crowds in the Outer Islands prepared for a series of matches. It seemed like nearly every match had something on the line.

Group A, containing Ad’ihan themselves, had the point-less co-hosts still somehow alive, through a series of possible of convoluted measures, all of which necessitated at least a win against Zwangzug; a team that even in second place at three points, would need some help, namely a loss or draw by the Korean-based team out of the Unified Captializt States, even in face of a victory. At least the other match contained two teams that had simple scenarios: Wentland, leading the group at six, would advance simply with a win or a draw (among other things), while the UCS’s junior entry, from the corporation Jasiyun, could assure themselves a place in the round of 16 with a win; they would win any tiebreaker that might ensue from a tie with at least Wentland, and possibly Zwangzug as well, in points.

Groups B and C were less murky, with Jeruselem and Demot, respectively, already ensuring a place in the next round, regardless of their next match against the top seeds, respectively Elves Security Forces and the UCS’s more dominant team, Capitalizt SLANI. In spite of their placement as the top seeds in their groups, both stood at four points, and needed at least one more to advance. Barring that, a failure by the team behind them at 1 point (Qazox for ESF, Bazalonia for SLANI) to win would allow the sides to back their way into the next round.

Group D, on the other hand, had it’s own odd situation. While the top two teams, Ariddia and Schiavonia, were both already through at 6 points, a disconcerting situation appeared to be on the rise, as Schiavonia seemed to disappear from the map. Having not heard any word from them, there may be a forced dropping of them from the next round, paving the way for the winner of the bottom-feeders, Bostopia or Cafundeu, to make it through. In fact, a tie would mean that Cafundeu would advance, scoring only 1 point in the first round!

The situation in Novapsolu was considerably different, with only one team winning both of their first two matches: Milchama. Unfortunately for the co-hosts, that result came out of their Group, leaving one spot in Group E up for grabs. Having no points though, Novapsolu can no longer contend for anything other than pride. The winner of Squornshelous and Quakmybush would take the spot, with Squorn having the goals for advantage, should they tie.

Groups F & G, like Groups B & C in Ad’ihan, were mirror images, in terms of points scored. Bettia & Vilita hold fragile group leads, each with 4 points, while two teams below them have three, with the bottom team at one. Additionally, both are playing one of the three-point sides in their final match, with Bettia taking on The Holy Empire, while Vilita tangles with Errinundera. The winner of each match gets a trip to the round of 16, while the loser has to hope for fate to favor them.

Group H, lastly, contained the only one-point progression per place of the competition. The Lowland Clans, in their final foray in the international game, leads at four points, followed by Tynelia at three, Kiryu-shi at two, and Az-cz at one. Nobody is safe going into the final day, as TLC could be eliminated with an Az-cz victory, as well as anything but a draw between Tynelia and Kiryu-shi.

With so many games mattering, and so much at stake, it would be an exciting night. The Chairman smiled, glad he could split the screen 16 ways.

OOC: MD3 RP Cutoff is Now

Jeruselem

10-10-2007, 05:33

Dinkie: Oi! Where's that Skate girl?
Hikfie: She went home ... to do something, looks like she's staying home.
Dinkie: Never mind, I heard rumours someone was pregnant around here - is that you?
Hikfie: Me? I don't know, but it's not me.

Dinkie: I guess it's Skate then but then we all know who her mother is.
Hikfie: Yeah!
Dinkie: Hey, we're nearly started this game against the Elves and you're not nervous about it. It's a big game and well, the Elves are a very good team.
Hikfie: Kate says I'm too stupid to be nervous!

Dinkie: How stupid are you?
Hikfie: Dallas stupid! Whatever that means.
Dinkie: Poor you!
Hikfie: That's OK, I'm alright!

Scarlet: Is the team ready? With or without Skate.
Hikfie: Yeah!
Scarlet: You picking on poor dopey here.
Dinkie: I don't think she knows the difference really. OK Hikfie get the rest of the team ready, we're running out.

Hikfie: Dokie Okie!
Scarlet: She's weird ...
Dinkie: What you mean weird, Kate's weirder
Scarlet: I don't know, bits of brain aren't working but she's still functioning very well for her intelligence level. She's a smart football player.

Dinkie: Yeah, you think it's genetic? I've never met a real stupid Dallas. All of the girls are smart - even dopey Hikfie.
Scarlet: And the Dallas guys are average, they aren't dumb but they aren't super smart either.
Dinkie: God, it's a weird family. Well, more like a factory!
Scarlet: Yeah, kids popping out everywhere.

(Team turn up)

Dinkie: OK, TEAM ARE YOU READY! I'm the Captain since Skate's gone home and skating around. Assistant Skate or Scooter is the vice captain here.
Scarlet: (smiles)
Dinkie: Let's go team!

(Team run out)

...

(After the game)

The Jeruselem team are shouting "Scooter! Scooter! Scooter!" with Scarlet Ferris all excited at scoring the winning goal. Her mobile rang, it was Kate Dallas at home who was equally as excited as her friend.

Scarlet shouted "Bring on Zwangzug! We are going take revenge! Team, you all know what the Princess wants. A cup, the cup! Let's make sure we do this time."

The team cheered.

Qazox

10-10-2007, 05:41

QSPNFOOTBALL.NET WORLD CUP 37 Report
Pheonix Five time, five time, five time, five time, five time failures

Already almost mathmatically eliminated from advancement, due to ESF's 1 goal loss, Qazox came out listless and pathetic against Oickoidia. Oickoidia is considered by most the worst World Cup qualifer ever, and they drew the Pheonix 0-0, in a match that set the world of football back a century or more. Qazox only took one shot all match, and Oickoidia took none as both sides seemignly just kicked the ball back and forth with little attempts to score or advance the ball.

So once again, Qazox flamed out in the group stages of the World Cup. Most of the squad that has been around for the last 3 Cups will be gone, and once again, the Pheonix will have to rebuild from the ashes as they begin to prepare for World Cup 38 qualifing.

Ariddia

10-10-2007, 14:26

http://spaam.mrdrake.net/flags/the_ariddian_isles.png Ariddia 3-1 Schiavonia http://spaam.mrdrake.net/flags/schiavonia.png

Clean sweep in group stage

Having secured qualification for the round of 16 after two group stage matches, the Rouge-et-Noirs had the luxury of fielding its “B team” for the final game against Schiavonia, and the entire usual starting eleven were left on the bench. Instead, Moboka, E’it, Isaacs, Tonnelier, Petras, Ewe, Chichirua, Thomas, Asu, Bernard and Takahara were Ariddia’s team for today’s encounter.

Yuto Takahara, who scored two of Ariddia’s three goals in today’s match, was given a rare opportunity to play alongside his sister Naoki Tonnelier, the Japanese-Ariddian siblings proving that they formed an effective combination to draw upon from Ariddia’s backup players.

The Rouge-et-Noirs’ other goal scorer was Es Chichirua, who amused spectators by kicking the ball into the net from between the legs of a Schiavonian defender.

Fielding the entire bench team has given less-known Rouge-et-Noirs an opportunity to appear in the international limelight. Although Naoki Tonnelier has already been snatched up to play for Albrecht FC in Candelaria And Marquez, players such as Takahara and Chichirua have not yet attracted the attention of foreign clubs.

While the “backup eleven” have gained valuable international experience in their World Cup match, the usual starters have had extra time to rest and prepare for the next round, where Ariddia will face Demot.

The last time the Rouge-et-Noirs lost a round of 16 match was in World Cup 29, over three decades ago. They crashed out in the group stages in World Cup 33, but, with that sole exception, have always reached the quarter-finals since World Cup 30. Team captain Iol Et, however, has said he does not want to rely on statistics.

“Every match is new and different in its own way. We’ll be studying Demot’s tactics, of course, and we have no intention of resting on past laurels. The Rouge-et-Noirs are always expected to reach the final, but that will only happen if we put the necessary effort into making it happen.”

Az-cz

10-10-2007, 18:07

Amda-Mo: Wow. That was quite a performance the Gnomes put out there today, beating The Lowland Clans 5-2 to advance behind Tynelia who thumped Kiryu-shi.

Lur-Mn: Yeah the whole squad really came through when they had to. Let's hope that play carries on through.

Amda-Mo: Let's talk about the formation. Zax-Im basically abandoned the 3-6-1. How would you describe the formation he was running out there?

Lur-Mn: Well it's easiest if you look at the subs. El-Iot started in place of Ho-Lee Chung and Shockey was played in defense instead of Hi-Kui with Hu-35 joining the midfield as a starter. So the formation was technically a 3-5-2 but it was really more like a 2.5-5.5-2.

Amda-Mo: So how was that able to free up the attack?

Lur-Mn: Well Zax-Im apparently had decided that the team was going to go out firing. They came out attacking balls to the wall and that put the Clans back on their heels. Also the extra attackers meant that they were less keyed in on any individual player. And El-Iot's opening goal in the 17th really bought Kn-Dg some space, which allowed him to add the two goals before the break.

Amda-Mo: The team subbed Seoula off at the half for Hi-Kui so how did The Lowland Clans fight back to 3-2?

Lur-Mn: Well they made attacking subs at the break, came out playing well and we struggled to shift gears back to the defending mode. And with a bit of a shuffled up lineup the communication was again not good. So another of things came together poorly for us then.

Amda-Mo: Were you suprised that after allowing two goals Zax-Im got more agressive sending on EE-Or for Hu-35 to switch back to the 3-5-2?

Zax-Im: You know, I was. But it worked EE-Or played great and his second goal once again freed up Kn-Dg who picked up the hat trick. Kn-Dg was once again magnificent, but the two additional strikers this game really played well as well.

Amda-Mo: Going forward do you think we'll see more of the 3-5-2?

Lur-Mn: Well to start the game I think we'll be back to our regular starters. Part of what made the 3-5-2 effective was that they hadn't prepared for it. We might see El-Iot replace Ho-Lee up front, but certainly don't expect Hi-Kui to start on the bench again.

Amda-Mo: Looking forward to the next match, how do you see us shaping up against Oliverry?

Lur-Mn: It's hard to say. Oliverry came on strong to top their group beating Errinundera and Northern Bettia. But in terms of talent I think we've got the edge. Unfortunately Oliverry is one of our bugaboo teams so that could hurt us. Either way I think it will be close. If our defense tightens up we should be ok. If we continue to hemorrhage goals it will be the end of the line for us.

Amda-Mo: Looking at the rest of the group stage, what were the biggest suprises?

Lur-Mn: Not many actually. The Elves and Zwangzug not topping their groups were minor suprises, but nothing really stunning. This biggest name eliminated on the field of play was probably Alasdair I Frosticus or Vilita. I'd say this is a pretty strong last 16.

Amda-Mo: And who are the top six going into the next round?

Lur-Mn:

6. Bettia

While they started off with a disappointing draw with Dance 2 Revolution they responded with two nice wins to put themselves back in a nice spot going into the second round.

5. Commerce Heights

Seven points from one of the toughest groups is nothing to hang their head about. Wins over Demot and Turori and a draw with Bazalonia are all good results.

4. Wentland

Wentland is here just by virtue of being undefeated. Coming out of the weakest group is no great shakes. The Zwangzug win is nice but that's the only feather in their cap. It'll be interesting to see if they can play up to this spot.

3. Jeruselem

The win over the Elves showed that Jeruselem could finally be back to the form they started to show in the early 30s world cups.

2. Milchama

It's not necessarily the quality of their opponents as much as their dominance. They struggled a bit with Novapsolu with the group wrapped up, but they dominated their first two games and rolled easily into the next round.

1. Ariddia

Suprise suprise. Ariddia is top of this list, again. They truly are an amazing team. It's nice they're on the other side of the bracket for once. Three wins over a good group and the defending champs are definitely the team to beat.

Amda-Mo: Do you think they'll win it all?

Lur-Mn: Well four knockout games is always a lot, no matter who you are, but if they're celebrating championship number four at the end of this cup no one will be suprised. Rejistanians and Bedistanis will be disappointed but it's a distinct possibility.

Amda-Mo: Well join us back here next time as we clash with Oliverry.

The Pazhujeb Islands

10-10-2007, 22:29

http://www.freewebs.com/abduldukhirahiq/PIFA%20Logo%202.PNG

Announcement

The Pazhujeb Islands Football Association proudly announces that Jaime Oberlander, the 71-year-old former coach of the Starblaydia national football team, has been named manager of the Pazhujeb Islands national football team. His new contract runs until the end of World Cup 38, the cup which he will lead the Purple Sea Urchins for in qualifying.

Wentland

10-10-2007, 22:43

"Dude!!"

"DUUUUUDE!!!"

"We didn't get paid, dude!!!"

"I know, dude!!! We shoulda got something for our most excellent commentary work."

"Never mind, dude, we got these cool jackets."

"Yeah, dude...fluorescent..."

"Yeah, dude...the cameramen weren't pleased..."

"No way, dude...we look like them..."

"Do you think they meant us to have them, dude?"

"Well, dude...they were just there...waiting..."

"And we weren't paid, dude..."

"I wonder if they need us for the next round, dude?"

"Dunno, dude...let's find out..."

***

"No, sirs, we do not need any Wentland fanzone commentary. Good day."

"Dude, bummer."

"Yeah, dude, we can't afford tickets."

"Let's see if we can sneak in..."

"THERE you are!!! Come on..."

"What, dude?"

"Not me, dude. It was shouty dude there."

"Come ON!!! We're short of camera operators..."

"Whoa, dude!! They want us to video."

"Yeah, dude!!! Filming pwns."

"Please hurry...they kick off in 40 minutes...we need to get you set up..."

"DUUUDE!!!"

Milchama

10-10-2007, 23:43

"Man what a great group stage"

"I was in a coma what happened?"

"Oh we swept through 3 wins, shut out two of our opponents and scored 7 goals total"

"That's really good so what is so different?"

"Easy, Belmowitz has been incredible with 4 goals, Marchakov and Kelton have finally been getting our dominance in the midfield and on the wings plus Mike E. Forent has finally been shooting good. It's been great."

"Oh I don't care about the football it all sucks, I'm talking about why are we winning? What purpose does it serve?"

"I just told you why there is no greater purpose"

"Did we pray to Margaret?"

"Yes"

"So then we are fine. All we need to do is too continue to be spiritual and all will be well."

"Wow! You have no common sense, wait a second I can't talk bad about these gods hmmm... oh I got it humans still have free will it is not all about the gods or a God."

"Sure"

"So then with Forent's current form when he scores two goals against Sel Appa it shouldn't be a surprise"

"If god wills it"

"I thought you willed a maxim on yourself"

"No"

"Uch fine"

"I win again"

"No you don't"

"Yes I do"

"No you don't"

"Yes I do"

"Yes you do"

"HA! I told you lost"

"Fine"

Oliverry

11-10-2007, 02:22

Jean Ladurandière: As the club's chairman, I'm pleased to welcome our new manager: Joeseph Rescotte!

*crowd cheers*

Joeseph Rescotte: Thank you everyone. Well, first, it's been a tough decision to leave my former club. But, after reviewing everything, I'm happy to join such a great club. I'm ready to do everything to keep this team in the Première Ligue and, even, to make them contenders for the league's championship. As this club never had an assistant manager, my first decision as this club's manager is to hire Tom Pensée as my Assistant Manager. He's been doing a great job with me with Marshalliston United and I feel he's going to do a good job here as well. A quick word Tom?

Tom Pensée: Yeah! That was my quick word.

Joeseph Rescotte: Thank you Tom, even if I was asking if you wanted to say something to the press and the fans in here. Anyway, thank you everyone, that's everything I had to say. *leaves the podium with Tom*

Joeseph Rescotte: Want a ride to your home, Tom?

Tom Pensée: Yes! I like your new car.

Joeseph Rescotte: Alright. Come here.

In Joeseph's car

Joeseph Rescotte: Happy now?

Tom Pensée: Yes. That car is really nice! The seats are pretty much comfortable.

Joeseph Rescotte: I was speaking about the team...

Tom Pensée: Ah yeah. Great thing for both of us. La Première Ligue... wow!

Joeseph Rescotte: That's what I was thinking. And my wife promised me a great surprise tonight once I come back

Tom Pensée: Three letters? S and X?

Joeseph Rescotte: Of course! What else? Is there any other way to have fun?

Tom Pensée: Yes: managing a soccer game...

Joeseph Rescotte: Once you get a girlfriend and stop living in your mom's basement, you'll understand what I mean.

Tom Pensée: I'm living with my brother, Nicolas. Not with my mother... You're so ignorant, I can't believe it Joe.

As they arrive to Tom's house

Tom Pensée: Thank you Joe.

Nicolas Pensée (singing): Joe-seph is a pansy, Joe-seph is a pansy

Joeseph Rescotte: Could you stop singing in English please?

Nicolas Pensée: I can't. That's the only way I can sing songs about how much of a pansy you are.

Joeseph Rescotte: Can I recall you that YOUR last name is the French translation of "Pansy"?

Nicolas Pensée: Six men [...]

Joeseph Rescotte: Anyway, later Tom.

Next morning

Joanne Racicot: Hey honey. Did you vote last night?

Joeseph Rescotte: Vote? CALISSE! J'ai oublié...

Joanne Racicot: I did, so want to see who won?

Joeseph Rescotte: Let's watch TV...

A screen showing the legislative elections results is shown (http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v338/Oli55/teleoli24elections2051.png)

Jacques Labrie: And the Socialists almost won a majority yesterday, as they got 218 seats. If they decide to have a coalition with the Marxists, they could have a 2 seats majority government. This is what is being expected from many political analysts. Now, let's speak about sports with Jean Daniel. Bonjour Jean.

Jean Daniel: Bon midi Jacques. So, in the World Cup, l'Oliverrie is going to the Ronde des 16, against Az-Cz. I'll remind our viewers that they won 1-0 against la Béttie du Nord, win which, allied with the fact that they won against l'Errinoundera, secured them the first place in Group G. This is going to be a tough game, but a win is very possible.

In other news, yesterday, Marsh Township FC named their new manager [...]

Joanne Racicot: Joe!! Ils vont parler de toi!

Joeseph Rescotte: Oh non... Switch... SWITCH!!

Joanne Racicot: Why do you hate to see yourself on TV?

Joeseph Rescotte: Not about myself... more about Tom... listen...

[A clip of the press conference is shown]

Joanne Racicot: I understand now...

phone rings

Joeseph Rescotte: Allo! Hi Tom!

Tom Pensée: Seen me on TV?

Joeseph Rescotte: Yeah... Why did you have to say such a thing?

Tom Pensée: I thought it was nice, that's it.

Joeseph Rescotte: You only wanted to call me to say that?

Tom Pensée: Oui. Bye! *Hangs on phone*

Jeruselem

11-10-2007, 02:36

Two men in van with video cameras ...

Man 1: Right, what are we here?
Man 2: Someone wants up to find how why Jeruselem female football players are so good, so we're spying on training.
Man 1: So we are spying on the Jeruselem female footballers?
Man 2: Yes, not a bad job then?

Man 1: Yes, better than spying on old men in suits.
Man 2: Right! There's the girls ... and that cheerleader.
Man 1: Cheerleader?
Man 2: The redhead! That redhead!

Man 1: Yes, I see her now! I'd like to take her home. What are they doing?
Man 2: Looks like training, secret training.
Man 1: Look there are starting.
Man 2: Zoom in on the cheerleader, who is it?

Man 1: It's that Scooter girl, Scarlet Ferris.
Man 2: She's very nice indeed. It seems the females in the team are learning ... cheerleading! I can't see the Princess though.
Man 1: Good to watch!
Man 2: I get what's going on.

Man 1: Cheerleading makes better football players?
Man 2: Well, I think Jeruselem don't to aerobics anymore. I think the girls do the cheerleading to replace it, the men might be inside doing powerlifting and other special gym work.
Man 1: Who started that?
Man 2: Who do think? Dazza Dallas of course. Jeruselem's sluttiest cheerleader.

Man 1: Where's the Princess then?

<Knock on the van, it's Kate Dallas and a guy holding a large gun>

Kate: Hello! What you guys looking at?
Man 1: Err, those birds over there!
Kate: You mean ones from Jeruselem? The ones with female assets.
Man 1: well, yes.

Kate: I'm Kate Dallas, I was wondering what this van was here for.
Man 1: Yes, we are spying.
Kate: That's alright. Have fun! Don't get too excited. It's just a bunch of women exercising.
Man 2: Err, can I have an autograph? My daughter is a fan of yours.

Kate: Sure thing!

Elves Security Forces

11-10-2007, 05:37

Outside the Wentland designated training ground, a pair of elves are looking towards the star blanketed sky, as if waiting on something.

"You really think we should be doing this Javier? If we get caught on tape, it's both of our careers down the toilet. Hell, I'm about to retire!"

A smirk came from the taller elf as he turned towards his friend.
"Don't worry Nikali, all we're doing is making sure they are rattled a little bit, and in all the chaos that will happen, there will be no way anyone will recongize us. Besides, there are plenty of elves who have traveled here to watch us, and many of them fanatics of the Navy Wave. Plus, I pulled a favor with the Great Leader, and our clones are at the hotel, so we have plausible deniability."

A long drawn out sigh comes from Nikali and as he was about to argue the point, Javier excalimed, "It's time!"

A single 747 cargo plane passes overhead, and small click can be heard in the neighborhood, as a package decends quickly to the ground, before the parachutes deploy, and it slowly decends to the unused instersection left of the elves. As it touches down, the 10ft x 10ft crate opens up, revealing a Goliath mech.

"Now are you with me or not Nikali?"

"Well, if it helps, and after those wretched performances against the woeful Oxen and the decendent of The Whore, we need some sort of break, so count me in."

As the two climb into the cockpit, and fire up the assualt mech, a wicked grin appears on the face of Javier, when the weapons check is cleared. Powering the machine foward, the mech crashes through the gate to the training grounds of the Wentland squad, and upon seeing their oppenents in the weekend match, begin firing around them, causing full scale panic for the training players, and a delerious high for the drivers of the weapon.

"Never toss an elf suckas!"

Adihan

11-10-2007, 15:59

"Radio Ad'ihan International. It's 1500, and these are the sports headlines. Ad'ihan knocked out! The cohosts lose at home to end their first World Cup finals experience. The World Cup of Ice Hockey's about to get underway in Kelssek, we'll have a report from Langlois, and also the baseball world cup, a preview coming up. But first, the latest from Ad'ihan in the world news, starting with breaking news that Governor Henna Jordan is in a serious condition in hospital after a major car accident earlier this morning. With the world news, here's Geoffrey Davies."

…………

"Welcome back to Your World in Sport, at 1506 Ad'ihan time. I'm Frédéric Salles, live from our studios in Ad'ihan. Our best wishes go out to Governor Jordan at this time. But on to the sport. The big story of the day, of course, is that Ad'ihan are out. And, without surprise, Luke Evans' job as national manager is on the line - after just three games. From Protectorate Stadium where he was watching the match, Davey Thomson reports."

"Thanks, Fred, and yes, it's over. A loss to Zwangzug today sealed the deal for Ad'ihan, but manager Luke Evans has vowed that he will not resign. He's only been in the job three games, so everyone expects the Ad'ihan Football Federation to give him a further chance - this will come during the Oxen Cup. Now, some fans are still here, and, weirdly enough, singing 'Red River Valley' to express their disappointment at the early elimination.

"Zwangzug won the toss and elected to kick left, so Ad'ihan got the game underway. Ad'ihan did well in the first half, for the first half of the first half at least. Simon Olson was felled on 28 minutes, needlessly so by the goalkeeper, Derrick Hunt, who's been under immense pressure after conceding seven goals in just two games. He was booked for his efforts, and gave up the penalty, and Ad'ihan were trailing. Hunt chose to remonstrate further with the referee at half time, leading to his second yellow and therefore a dismissal, forcing Evans to make a half time change.

"Evans chose to bring off Brandon Jarvis, which seemingly conceded defeat, going from three up front to just two. Éric Adamo, the assistant manager, got into trouble as well with the ref, and was told to leave the sidelines. This seemed to fire the team up, however, with Chris Stall grabbing an equaliser - the ten men of Ad'ihan had struck back.

"More was to come, and Ad'ihan took an improbable two-one lead with eighteen minutes to play. In a move reminiscent of the goal Lenny Fowler scored against Wentland, Ad'ihan's midfield played some smooth passes, Fowler this time doing the dummy, and allowing, of all the people, Jed Fisher, who had come up from defence, to strike home and silence the Zwangzug fans.

"It wasn't to be, with Fisher going from hero to zero, his poorly-timed tackle on Olson giving away a free-kick which was converted with fourteen to play, then a poor clearance of the ball straight to Olson gave the Zwangzug man his hat-trick. Jacob Barons finished the goalscoring rout - three unanswered in fourteen minutes - in the last minute of regular time with a well-placed strike from 20 yards out.

"Ad'ihan did surprisingly well for a team with ten men, and that's one thing Evans can take heart from - a good performance. Ad'ihan, the cohosts, go out of the World Cup, with no wins from three.

"From Protectorate Stadium in Ad'ihan, I'm Davey Thomson, for Radio Ad'ihan International."

Tynelia

11-10-2007, 16:07

“Agents Adams and Black to see you sir.”

“Thank you Agent Moneypenny, send them in.”

“Yes sir Agent Smith.”

The two identically attired agents walk in though Agent Adams is blond, the lone difference between the two sunglassed agents, and their superior as well. For that matter.

“Agent Adams, excellently done.” Agent Smith says standing to shake Adam’s hand with a minute upturn of his lips in what was the biggest smile Agent Smith was capable of. “Not only did you successfully win the group but you have advanced to the knockouts, something no Tynelian team has ever done. We should have put the government in charge of this World Cup to begin with, who cares about those so called sports experts.”

“Thank you sir, but I couldn’t have done it with out the intel our spy satellites sent me as they spied over the opponents practices and the computer taps into their coaches PCs. The team was a bit unhappy about the sealing of their identities from the public but success has wiped that all away now.”

“Yes, I knew it would. Before I go any futher. As I told Agent Black here before, if you got this far you’d be getting a promotion. So congratulations Agent Jones.”

“Thank you sir, but for security reasons I think I should retain the Adams cover until this Cup is done. Our enemies might suspect something otherwise if my name were to change in the middle of this.”

“Good point Agent Jones, that’s what I like to see from my agents, independent initiative.”

“Now Agent Black, as this was your scenario and Agent Jones here managed to do his part despite your blunderings about those cultists, I shall restore you to Agent Adams status effective immediately.”

“Thank you sir.” Replied the rank bouncing Agent Adams as he wondered how long he’d be at this rank, he hadn’t even finished moving in to his Black level quarters so at least some of his stuff would still be at his Adams rank room and not have to be moved back.

“Of course I can’t have a Jones reporting to an Adams so as of right now Agent Jones will be independent of your direct command and you may only deal with him as an advisory basis Agent Adams, Agent Jones will have full discretion as to what to do with your intel. Speaking of which, you have news Adams?”

“Yes sir, I just heard that a huge rally of the New Othydoxic Christian Church of Reborn Othydoxy will be taking place outside the Presidential Coliseum in support of the team. They filed it under a public permit so they got around the ‘no religious public meetings outside approved temple area’ clause in the town bylaws.”

“I see, send some agents to keep an eye on it and report anyone who tries talking religious mumbo-jumbo in the middle. Maybe we can get some arrests. Good workm in bringing this to me Agent Adams, stay on top of it.”

“Yes sir.”

“Agent Adams, now you have to avenge our defeat to Errinundera next, nice work on the Az-cz vengeance, your theory that the lower ranked team always wins seems to be paying off. And these tree huggers are ranked even higher than the gnomes so it should work even more in our favor.”

“yes sir and thank you for the timely advise to kick the ball high over the reach of the shorter gnomes, it paid off handily.”

Kiss ass thought Agent Adams.

“Anytime, Jones, its my job to make yours easier. Now off with you both. You have work to do.”

“Yes sir!” they replied in unison.

“Agent Moneypenny, who’s next on the schedule?”

“Agent Jenkins sir, he was spotted by the notorious drug smuggler Anah Brullu and ruined our sting operation in Doster.”

“That idiot, how did he make it through training anyway? send him in Moneypenny.”

Bettia

11-10-2007, 16:12

The Enlightener: a better dealings than your current dealings
http://i6.photobucket.com/albums/y231/bettia/FAB.png

The Future's Bright, The Future's Green

Bettia..............................3 (Miranda 2, A.Busilanta 37pen, B.Busilanta 77)
The Holy Empire..........1 (Tzimisces 84)

The pre-match talk before the game was of The Holy Empire's shocking (and quite frankly disgusting) decision to wear specially-commissioned red shirts for this crucial matchup. Even more worrying for the team management was the claim that the redness of these shirts would be unaffected by the usual blue-tinted counter-measures. It took some sleepless nights and plenty of extra-caffeinated tea, but the boffins behind Azurlens eventually came up with an alternative, one which not be affected by these new red shirts - Verdilens.

Simple, yet effective. Replace the blue lenses with green ones.

The throngs of Bettian fans, already suffering headaches and the occasional seizure from all the nasty shades of red being worn by the Holy Empire's contingent, were surprised yet mightily relieved when FAB officials started handing out their new green-tinted sunglasses. In an instant, their world was transformed into a pleasant shade of emerald, and the game was ready to begin.

The manager's criticisms from the Sel Appa game about them starting slowly had obviously been taken on board by the players as they hurtled out of the blocks. An attack was mounted straight from the kickoff, with young Stuart Bettwys charging down the wing before putting in a cross which was deflected behind for a corner. From the resulting set-piece, Aroras top scored Evan Miranda was on hand to poke in the inswinging cross.

Having been buoyed by this early breakthrough, Bettia continued to press although The Holy Empire didn't go without creating some good chances of their own. Tzetzes was unlucky to see his shot clip the outside of a post, whilst his strike partner Synadenuso forced a top-class save out of Chris Swift. At the other end, Miranda came close to adding to his goal tally only to be denied by a fingertip save from Dalassano.

The Aroras advantage was doubled as the game edged closer to half-time. Yulianto gathered the ball just outside the area and took a speculative shot which struck Ducaso-Murtzuphlo square on the forearm as he attempted to twist himself away from it. The foul certainly wasn't deliberate but it did affect a clear goalbound effort, and so the referee had no hesitation in awarding the penalty. After a short delay caused by one or two Holy Empire players protesting their cause, Andi Busilanta stepped up to stroke the spot-kick home.

The second half was just as exciting as the first as the two attack-minded teams continued to go at it. Yulianto and Miranda combined well before setting up Bettwys for a shot - however, his shot was easily gathered by Dalassano. Miranda then proceeded to round the keeper a few minutes later, but his shot was well cleared of the line by Phocaso.

As the game wore on, the usual round of substitutions was carried out, with Miranda being replaced by Budi Busilanta. Budi immediately made an impact as he and his brother showed just why they formed such a deadly partnership in previous World Cups. Indeed, it was Budi who all but killed the game off with a fine strike from outside the box which curled wickedly out of Dalassano's reach.

Even though the Aroras were home and dry, the action didn't stop there. Much had been made in the Holy Empire of the return of their coach and captain Juan Tzimisces, so it was only fitting that he should round off their campaign by netting their final goal after meeting Orphanotropho's with a thumping header.

And so Bettia finish the group in top spot, and go on to meet Squornshelous in the second round. The Arora's record against the Psychoes is less than impressive, having lost all three of their previous meetings, and only managing two goals to their six. Add to this the fact that they are yet another team who wear that most awful of colours, and it means that progressing to the quarter-finals will be a difficult task. However, Bettia are a stronger team than when the two teams met before, and so an intriguing match between two attack-minded teams should be expected.

Fixtures / Results

MD..OPPONENT................VENUE......RESULT

Knockout Stages

01: Squornshelous...........Novap.....

1st Round, Group F

01: Dance 2 Revolution......Sioal......D 1-1
02: Sel Appa................Dirlkae....W 4-1
03: The Holy Empire.........Sioal......W 3-1

Friendlies

FR: Az-cz...................Away.......L 0-2
FR: Elves Security Forces...Away.......W 1-0

Qualifying Group 6

01: Zyla....................HOME.......W 3-0
02: Geisenfried.............Away.......W 1-0
03: Patusan.................HOME.......W 3-0
04: The Indonesian States...Away.......W 4-0
05: Turori..................HOME.......L 2-4
06: Kura-Pelland............Away.......D 1-1
07: The Non-RPing n00B......HOME.......W 3-0
08: Zyla....................Away.......W 3-0
09: Geisenfried.............HOME.......W 5-1
10: Patusan.................Away.......W 2-1
11: The Indonesian States...HOME.......W 7-0
12: Turori..................Away.......W 6-0
13: Kura-Pelland............HOME.......W 3-1
14: The Non-RPing n00B......Away.......W 2-0

Az-cz

11-10-2007, 17:35

Az-cz Scroll
Az-cz

Third time's the charm?

Well I've correctly predicted the winner of the cup twice in a row. Now it's time to see if I can pull it off for a third consecutive time. Before we get to that we'll take a look back at the predictions from the group stage and see how I did. And no -SSHAT won't be joining us. Picking Alasdair I Frosticus to win the cup was folly enough.

Predictions:

Starting with our group I was somewhat on the ball. I got the two qualifiers correct and also Kiryu-shi's sporting but unsuccesful performance down. Just overestimated us a bit.

The next group I was totally off on. Errinundera didn't top the group and Northern Bettia didn't come close to qualifying. Instead Oliverry topped the group and Errinundera was second. Not so hot.

Milchama and Squornshelous advancing fairly easily is nothing of a suprise. That group I called dead on.

The last group in Novapsolu did see Bettia through on top but Sel Appa was the suprise second place finisher. Just a much more balanced group than I had expected.

Over in Adi'han things were both better and worse for my predictions. In group A I got the two advancing teams correct, but the order wrong.

Group B was struggles as the Elves and Qazox were both huge disappointments as Jeruselem ran away with the group. The Elves at least managed to survive.

Group C was half easy to call. Commerce Heights was the best team, but Demot once again advanced while the Bazalopes once again missed the last 16. Their struggles in the group stage really is inexplicable.

Group D was pretty well botched, but a technicality allowed me to get both teams correct. Ariddia was dominant and blew away the group with Schiavonia finishing second. However they were removed from the tournament for reasons unbeknownst to anyone here in Az-cz which allowed Cafundeu to take the second spot. They didn't play well like I expected but they did advance, even if it was the wrong place.

All in all not my greatest performance. But the Elves are still alive and it's only predicting the winner that counts. Now lets see if I stick with the Elves or audible to someone else.

Round of 16

Wentland v Elves Security Forces
Ariddia v Demot
Jeruselem v Zwangzug
Commerce Heights v Cafundeu
Milchama v Sel Appa
Tynelia v Errinundera
Bettia v Squornshelous
Oliverry v Az-cz

Well the Elves struggled but I'm not ready to give up on them. I think they'll beat Wentland at least. I think Demot will author the surprise of the tournament to send Ariddia home and earn a match against their former colonialists. Despite their good group stage I'm just not sold with Jeruselem so I'll call Zwangzug to go through. And Commerce Heights will prove that Cafundeu didn't deserve to advance in the battle of World Cup 36 hosts. Milchama will roll Sel Appa in the most lopsided match of the round. Tynelia's good run will continue as they reinstate Errinundera's second round troubles. Bettia will outscore Squornshelous and we'll come up with a close win over Oliverry.

Quarterfinals

Elves Security Forces v Demot
Zwangzug v Commerce Heights
Milchama v Tynelia
Az-cz v Bettia

The Elves will beat Demot to move to another semifinals for themselves. Commerce Heights will continue to prove just how great they are. Milchama will finally end the Tynelia run and we'll fall at hands of Bettia, reversing the friendly from early in qualifying.

Semifinals:

Elves Security Forces v Commerce Heights
Milchama v Bettia

I'm tempted here to go with Commerce Heights, but I believe in the Elves and will stick with my choice. On the other side I think Bettia is just too good for Milchama.

Third place playoff

Commerce Heights will beat Milchama to bring home the bronze.

Finals

Elves Security Forces v Bettia

Could it be that Bettia continues the streak of alternating Ariddia-Bettia? I don't think so. I think the Elves will put their struggles behind them and rocket to the top. But they have a tough road ahead of them, so it'll be a challenge.

Zwangzug

11-10-2007, 23:34

"...seeking to find out whether the next game will be held in Ad'ihan, Ad'ihan, or...not. But here with me is coach Doodlypants Mcgimpy. Thanks for joining us, Coach."

"You're welcome."

"Thoughts on the group stage?"

"We got it done, were able to put some wins together. Not the best, sure, but we'd like to think we can save enough strength for a final push."

"What did you think of the Ad'ihan game?"

"Good match, yes, for us anyhow. Nice to see the goals start to rack up there at the end, that's the sort of drive we want going into the knockouts."

"And what do you expect for the matchup against Jeruselem?"

"Well, it doesn't look like any of their players have died recently, so we should be able to get down to the football."

"Some of their media have criticized Zwangzug for "taking" their spot in the second round of the last cup."

""Taking?" Did they have it saved? Any team can win a game or two, and if our show last time didn't prove we were a quality team, I'm an anteater's aunt."

"Ah. Well then. Any changes to the starting lineup?"

"I'd like my best eleven out there, at least to start. But Nexus has a sore neck-probably from turning it too far to look at the Wentland-JSY score-and we're not sure if he'll get the start. Lauren, then, would replace him. Faustino's looked edgy since his foul, but I think he'll do fine."

"Best of luck!"

"Thanks."

"Once again, Zwangzug will take on Jeruselem tonight: catch all the action here. Back to the newsroom: owners claim that a dog can differentiate between soylent products by taste. Details at six."

Jeruselem

12-10-2007, 01:27

http://img470.imageshack.us/img470/8564/jgnlogohe2.png

Dopey Dallas planning to move to Bostopia

Dopey Dallas or Hikfie Dallas is planning to move to Bostopia to be closer to her boyfriend Peter Jeffers. She is currently planning to talk to Port Flamerty FC in Bostopia about a transfer from Tel Aviv Sharks, which is owned by Dazza Dallas.

Her mother and agent, Debbie Dallas said
"Hikfie is bit too stupid to negiotiate anything herself. There's no issue with my sister releasing her from the current contract and we're all related anyway. We think Port Flamerty FC would be happy to have a Jeruselem World Cup team member so I think we can strike a deal. We won't give Hikfie away, but we won't be greedy either. If Port Flamerty FC won't play the game, we'll find Hikfie another Bostopia club. Unlike the high maintenance Dazza and Kate Dallas, she's a simple girl with simple needs. A steady job, a good partner and a few kids. That's all. Her only real vice is collecting Rubber Chickens."

Should Hikfie move to Bostopia, she'll lose her position as Jeruselem Weather Girl. Her sister Fiskin Dallas is keen to take over.

Novapsolu

12-10-2007, 04:00

This is the Cutoff for the Round of Sixteen

Round of 16 results in Ad'ihan (http://forums.jolt.co.uk/showpost.php?p=13127563&postcount=32)

Round of 16 results in Novapsolu (http://forums.jolt.co.uk/showpost.php?p=13127558&postcount=31)

Jeruselem

12-10-2007, 05:58

http://img470.imageshack.us/img470/8564/jgnlogohe2.png

Jeruselem loses to Zwangzug, scare for Princess Kate

Well, that team called Zwangzug did Jeruselem in again. In the quarter-final of the World Cup 37, they beat us ONE NIL to once again stop the dream. The real news was Demot beating World Cup champs Ariddia FOUR ONE, which was totally unexpected. Other games produced predictable results. You can see these on our web site.

Princess Kate Dallas (or Skate as most of the team call her) had a scare when she was kicked in the stomach by accident. Kate crashed to crowd screaming "My baby! My baby!". Normally, there is no concern when this happens but the team management said Kate was actually pregnant all cup. They didn't say who the father was.

After she was taken off the field for her own and her child's safety, Zwangzug took advantage of the situation with the Jeruselem captain missing and the captaincy handled over to Dinkie Dosha. Jeruselem under Dinkie does not seem the same under Skate and Zwangzug hung on for a narrow win despite attempts by Jeruselem to score the vital goal.

It seems old Dallas habits die hard. The team doctor said Skate was alright and no damage was done except that Kate was a bit sensitive in some areas of her body to pain. Dinkie Dosha said she wasn't a real captain, and the loss of Kate Dallas was a real blow during the game.

The big news with Ariddia crashing to Demot is yet to hit. It wasn't a good day for the resident Dallas clan whose both teams lost today. Oliverrian Scarlet Ferris bemoaned her home team crashing to the Gnomes 5-2.

In other news, Hose Tunk announced he was marrying Dr Sally Dallas. The son of Jeru FC coach, Abrams Tunk, had been dating for a while. Dr Sally Dallas is a sister of Hikfie Dallas, and a niece of Kate Dallas. Speaking for her sister, Hikfie Dallas said
"She's excited. My side of the family is well behaved. The Dazza side isn't. I can't wait for my turn!"

Jeruselem

12-10-2007, 12:16

The Jeruselem team were leaving their hotel when the two Dallas girls were doing a head count.

Kate: Right! We are missing ... Dinkie! Everyone else is here.
Hikfie: Dinkie?
Kate: You stay here, I'll go find her.

<Kate marches off the hotel security to Dinkie's room>

Kate: Dinkie, you in there? Open the door, it's Skate. Are you in there?

<Silence>

Kate: Guys, open the door.

<Security opens the door>

They can't find Dinkie except for her packed bags and an open door to the balcony. They look in the bathroom and can't find her

Kate: Bloody hell, where is she? (a few more swear words) Hey, why was the balcony door open?

Everyone looks down

Kate: She's floating in the swimming pool! Oh God! Dinkie!

<Later>

Kate: Well?
Policeman: It looks like she tripped over a flowerpot and tipped over into the pool.
Kate: She couldn't swim! (sobbing)
Policeman: We found some broken fingernails on the balcony, looks like tried to grab the rail but could hold on.

Kate: And the flowerpot?
Policeman: Knocked over, where we found her fingernails.
Kate: And she definitely drowned?
Policeman: The body shows no evidence of foul play. Death by drowning.

Kate: What about being pushed over?
Policeman: Possible but I don't so.
Kate: Well, she did go to sleep early while I got myself a bit drunk at the bar. I spoke to the team, no one saw her leave her room.
Policeman: Hotel staff said her room was pretty quiet all night.

Kate: I'll stay behind and take the body home ... I'll sign anything you need.
Policeman: We are sorry, we can't do anything more.
Kate: God! Why Dinkie! (cries)

Ariddia

12-10-2007, 18:00

http://spaam.mrdrake.net/flags/the_ariddian_isles.png Ariddia 1-4 Demot http://spaam.mrdrake.net/flags/demot.png

“Shock and grief” as the Rouge-et-Noirs are sent home early

It had been repeated, many times, that every knock-out match is difficult, that victory was never ensured in advance, that every opponent was dangerous at such a high level. Nonetheless, the vast majority of Ariddians no doubt expected the round of sixteen match to be a mere formality, as their side leapt over a low hurdle on their way to greater glory.

Poor Demot. To have to face Ariddia at this stage.

After all, they are the Rouge-et-Noirs. And the Rouge-et-Noirs do not lose. Not anymore.

All right, perhaps the semi-final may be of some concern. But anything before that is mere warm-up. Practice. A technicality. A chance to enjoy watching the Red-and-Blacks shine. The contentment of sitting back and just knowing they’re going to win.

Enter an astonishing Demot. Demot? They’d never played the Rouge-et-Noirs before. They went out in the second round four years ago, while Ariddia sailed on to its third World Title. A nation of football fanatics...

... and more. A nation with one jolly good team. Playing to attack as much as they could, they were using the Ariddians’ game against them, with remarkable efficiency. The Rouge-et-Noirs were left struggling to cope, while supporters watched on with increasingly nervous, then anguished disbelief.

Demot opened the score, in the twenty-second minute, through Rahall Lewis. A small mistake from the Ariddian defence. Such things happen. A minor hiccough. Everyone at home was thoroughly pleased when Jamilah Shahrour put things right, providing an equaliser twelve minutes later. Now the Ariddians could play their magic. Relieved, supporters leaned back and looked forward to another treat.

A corner kick, in the fortieth minute. Edmund Vorca shoots it, a perfect aim that finds Rahall Lewis’ head – him again. Lewis turns, the ball’s trajectory following his move, and into the net it goes. 2-1. The Rouge-et-Noirs are trailing at half-time.

Back in Ariddia, people begin to worry. A little. Plenty of time yet, but still…

Fifty-ninth minute. Hwang Kumchol scores a beautiful goal, and everyone applauds, sighing with relief. Relief which turns to something else as the referee is seen shaking his head: Hwang had been offside when Ann Cove had passed him the ball. Hwang, stunned, refuses to believe it, argues. He’s shown a yellow card. The young Arctic Islander continues to protest, until his captain, Iol Et, comes to calm him down.

Of course, the referee was right. A ridiculously small offside it was, but an offside nonetheless. No equaliser.

Sixty-sixth minute. Ariddian defenders miscommunicate, Vorca rushes the ball into Tu Wesh’s danger area, and the Ariddian goalie hurries out to meet him. Tries to kick the ball before Vorca can, misses, slips… and kicks Demot’s midfielder squarely in the crotch. Vorca goes down hard, Wesh looks aghast, and the referee –of course– sees red. Out goes Tu Wesh, his hand over his face in consternation, shaking his head. He pauses only long enough to apologise to Edmund Vorca, who receives hasty medical attention.

Second goalie Armel Moboka was injured during training, so in comes Ariddia’s third goalie – Jarl Knudsen, the “Flying Mountain”. One metre ninety eight tall, shoulders broader than a rugby player, and pale blue eyes that some say make him look slightly deranged. Ariddia’s supporters try to find some cheer in the presence of their favourite mobile mountain-man, but their confidence is already eroded. And they are allowed only ten players on the pitch: for Knudsen to come on, Heather Rodriguez has to go out.

Not good.

Vorca, back on his feet, takes the penalty shot, and the Flying Mountain leaps the wrong way. Demot’s supporters cheer.

3-1.

Precious minutes are falling away now, and Demot’s team is showing no sign of weakening. Elmi Guirreh has an opportunity to shoot on goal in the seventy-seventh minute, but the shot goes just centimetres wide. The Ariddian forward trio of Guirreh, Shahrour and Et –reportedly the best Ariddian attacking trio ever– are simply not finding the solutions to unlock the agonising Demot enigma.

More minutes tumble away.

Eighty-first minute. Guirreh shoots on goal. Alexander Orien saves. Demot hit back with a lightning counter-attack, and Maria Hart manages to strike the ball towards Knudsen’s goalcage. The “Flying Mountain” saves.

Eighty-sixth minute. Hwang Kumchol fells Rahall Lewis with an illegitimate tackle, and the referee hands him his second yellow of the match. Out goes Hwang, literally punching himself in the arm in self-directed fury. The Rouge-et-Noirs will play the final minutes with only nine players to Demot’s eleven – and still two goals down.

Demot’s energy still has not run out. Perhaps the adrenaline, the thrill of being mere moments away from an astonishing upset, is keeping them going. Ariddia’s amputated, disorganised defence cannot push back a final attack, and a superb shot by Maria Hart catches Knudsen off-guard. 4-1.

Thirty-seven seconds left on the clock, and the Rouge-et-Noirs must score three goals to keep the game alive. They’ve pulled off miracles before, but this is the realm of the impossible, and they all know it.

The whistle blows. Ariddia is out of the World Cup.

Demot’s players and supporters erupt with the joy they had been holding back for the past ten minutes at least, and begin to celebrate a well-earned victory against those who had been the defending World Champions.

Knudsen sits down in his goal cage, stunned. Wol Asu has her hand in front of her mouth, and looks as if she’s struggling against tears. Iol Et’s face is grim. The thirty-five year-old captain knows this has been his final match – and definitely not the way he had wanted to end his career. The “wonder trio” he had formed with Guirreh and Shahrour did not work today, and now it is no more. Ariddia will have to seek other tactics, other players in four years’ time.

Tonight, for now, it’s all over. In Ariddian pubs, disconsolate fans wipe the red and black paint off their faces. A young woman cries, quietly, still draped in the national flag, while her boyfriend –or perhaps simply a friend– consoles her.

There will now be a final without the Rouge-et-Noirs. Such a thing has not happened since World Cup 33.

“Bloody hell, four-one. . .” a supporters mutters, dazed, as he leaves the stadium.

Thinking, analysing, will come later. For now, an entire country seems simply numbed with shock.

Zwangzug

12-10-2007, 23:18

It was a school night in Spenson, and the Larsens were not allowed to stay up and watch the game. But Friday afternoon brought a glorious expanse of free time to zip through the highlights, looking forward and back.

"Cafundéu next," David grinned with excitement.

"Yep," Susanna smiled. "Hey, speaking of Cafundéu, we should get out that computer game! We played Jeruselem first, maybe we can make it go like this game."

"Good idea!"

They eagerly booted it up and updated the file with the current rosters. After simulating the first irrelevant matches, Zwangzug vs. Jeruselem was finally reached.

Kick Off

4 mins:
Ferris for Jeruselem
Still Ferris
Dosha
Faustino tackles him

"Him?" laughed Susanna.

11 mins:
Renault for Jeruselem
Hooney
Hooney shoots...

World Cup 36 Computer Game has encountered a problem and needs to close. We apologize for the inconvenience.

"You messed up again," David lambasted.

"Give it here," Susanna groaned. "Let's fix it..."

some time later

"All right, kids, that's enough."

"Aw, c'mon, Dad, we need to make it work!" David protested.

"You've spent plenty of time there anyhow."

"Yeah, but it doesn't work. The real team always shuts out Jeruselem."

"All two times," Susanna laughed.

"What do you mean it doesn't work? All you do is press the button..." Mr. Larsen demonstrated, and text suddenly filled the screen.

6 mins
Foster for Jeruselem
le Peace
Barons
Hammers
Renault
Renault uses his pace
Faustino
Zwangzug are really fired up for this game
37 mins
Barnes for Zwangzug
Hammers
Moshan
Moshan shows great skill
Barons
Tuff
Olson
GOAL! Olson SCORES!
>>>>Half time<<<<
46 mins
Jeruselem plays a long ball to Dallas
Dallas
Dallas
Still Dallas
Dallas
Card brings down Dallas!
68 mins
Jeruselem are working their socks off
but are not making it count
76 mins
Jeruselem are making relatively few mistakes
but they need to find an opening
89 mins
Zwangzug appear comfortable with their tactics

"How'd you do that, Dad?" David exulted.

He shrugged. "Just got lucky, I guess."

Elves Security Forces

13-10-2007, 18:31

"Good morning lad and lasses. I first want to congradulate you on your fabulous win over those defensive junkies of Wentland. Ali, you did well on me for putting you in the starting line up, nabbing that equalizer just minutes after we had gone down. Your future looks bright, and Kiso, well, to put one in just seconds before we would of gone to extra time, all it does is build your lore and fan club.

But this next match we have a very odd challange ahead of us. You all know I speak of the Demot side, whom we literaly taught how to play the game those many years ago. While they do possess that flair of attack we do, they are quite more physical in their approach, and are not the type of players who try to avoid the tackles. Nope, you all know they are just as aggressive as those Turruth Gordurians. As a result, I'm altering the line up abit. Nikali, you'll be on the bench, and Zensan, you'll be playing the middle. I'm going to need your frame and hard work in the middle to counter the Demot approach. Ali, you're still in the line up as your size helps as well. Laborious, you'll be moving up to where Cuellar usually played, and Jannian, you got the arm band.

Once last thing, I invited a special assistant to help us prepare for the match. You all know who he is, and I think his knowledge on the physical game will benifit us considering our oppisition. It's none other than The Butcher, former manager of the Turruth Gordur national team." Constant explained as he stepped aside and the physical specimen known as The Butcher Harold stepped forward. There was a murmer about the squad, as a few whispered about the rumors of the former manager.

"Wasn't he killed?"
"I heard he killed someone!"
"Wasn't he the one who kindnapped Callo Merlose?"
"Yeah yeah, and when she came back, she was completely different. They say he did some brainwashing when he took her."
"What the heck is Constant thinking?!"

The Butcher quickly grabbed the teams attention and shut them up when he started to write on the whiteboard. When he was finished, two words were on displayed.
MENTAL TOUGHNESS

"Remember these words lads. I've followed your raggedy bunch of wanna bes for decades. You all think you've got a bit a skill, and yeah you might be able to kick the shrimpeys, but whenever you face a superirior oppisition, you go back with your tails between you legs, crying to your effin goddess. NOT ANYMORE!!! Under my guidance, you will be both physcially gifted and mentally tough. If you think you cant cut if out, then you just prove what kind of fairies you really are. But, if you can meet my call, this group of creampuffs before me will be true champions of the pitch, players worthy of becoming champions of the world, and that is just what I am going to help you become.
Any questions?"

Only the sound of a few crickets chirping was able to break the tension caused by the sudden demeaning speech by the so called assistant.

"Good, let's begin."

The Butcher lead the squad to a large building, where upon entering, they were surprised to see that it had a pitch installed in it, as well as a Thor mech. After being told to stop by the Butcher, he made his way to the mech before jumping into the cockpit.

"First lesson, evasion! If you can dodge a bullet, you can dodge a tackle. Mwhahahahaha."

Az-cz

13-10-2007, 18:32

Amda-Mo: And the Gnomes are through to a fifth consecutive quarterfinals with another great offensive performance, beating Oliverry 5-2.

Lur-Mn: And hats off to Zax-Im. He made a bold move in the third match against The Lowland Clans, switching to a new 3-5-2 formation and sticking with it here in the second round.

Amda-Mo: Was that the key to the offense?

Lur-Mn: Well the whole team played well, but El-Iot has to be given a lot of credit. His two quick goals really boosted the team up and forced Oliverry to press, which really opened the field up for the rest of the team. We put up five goals without Kn-Dg netting one, which tells you where the team was at today. So the offense definitely has opened up with El-Iot in there.

Amda-Mo: How about defense? For the fourth straight game we allowed two goals.

Lur-Mn: That is worrying, especially with Bettia coming up. If our defense doesn't improve even five goals might not be enough to trump the Aroras. When good but not great teams are consistently scoring against an offensive juggernaut could give us real headaches. We just have to play better.

Amda-Mo: Any changes to the lineup?

Lur-Mn: I dunno. He could try to shuffle the back line somehow, but the midfield and forwards will stay the same. Maybe Du-Tre or La-Yu will make the starting lineup but I don't see it happening.

Amda-Mo: Looking forward to the Bettia match what needs to happen for us to beat them?

Lur-Mn: Well we need our defense to tighten up. That's what will be key. I'd be surprised if we were shutout, but Bettia's too good to be shutout either. The question is which defense will limit the damage. Bettia will come into the match as favorites but if our players step up we can take them down.

Amda-Mo: How will the history of the two nations effect the match?

Lur-Mn: Despite having played each other a lot recently the last real game was that finals in Az-cz. Both teams are much different than they were then, so we can't tell that much from that game. The friendlies paint a better picture, and we won the last time we played which is encouraging. But friendlies are not World Cup quarterfinals. I think the revenge factor from players like Kn-Dg will be a positive but won't carry the day.

Amda-Mo: Do you think the players are worried about either of the so called curses placed on us, the Audioslavian curse and the quarterfinals curse.

Lur-Mn: Well I don't believe in that mumbo-jumbo but it will cause a bit of doubt. Although I must say I think that the quarterfinal curse can hardly be called a curse anyways. Three times in a row is well within statistical variatin, especially when we met the Rouge-Et-Noirs in two of those.

Amda-Mo: Speaking of Ariddia, let's look at the rest of the second round matchups.

Lur-Mn: Well we'll start with them. They were shocked by our bid partners and good friends from Demot 4-1. While Demot winning would only be a minor upset, the mental meltdown from Ariddia with two players sent off was stunning. They were outclassed all day and went out in stunning fashion. That sets up a matchup of great interest, probably second only to our clash with Bettia. That game is Elves Security Forces against Demot. Considering the history between the two the game will be fierce. And both are definitely amongst the footballing elite so it will be a great matchup. The other teams who won in Adihan were Zwangzug who smothered the Jeruselem attack and Cafundeu, who took advantage of their lucky advancement and upset their World Cup 36 co-hosts from Commerce Heights. In Novapsolu Errinundera was the third team with a three goal victory as they closed out Tynelia with ease 3-0. And they face a suprising quarterfinal matchup in Sel Appa. Although most Az-czzers were expecting Milchama to win the Turtles further cemented their status as elite. Which leads to Betttia's win over Squornshelous, the only game that needed extra time to wrap up.

Amda-Mo: A pretty crazy day. Only one group winner advanced. That pretty much fits with the craziness we've seen this cup. According to our crack-staff of researchers the last time that few group winners advanced was world cup 28.

Lur-Mn: Pretty wild stuff.

Amda-Mo: Which means that the top six is pretty much up for grabs, then.

Lur-Mn: It certainly is. It's also means it's pretty easy to guess who the top team is.

6. Sel Appa

The turtles are the last team on this list. With a negative goal differential in the group stage and a tough win over Milchama they got this nod over the Elves because Elves Security Forces only other win until now was Oickoidia. Sel Appa hasn't necessarily been impressive, but they're in the quarterfinals which means something.

5. Az-cz

After a very rought start to the cup Zax-Im tinkered with the lineup and the offense has come alive. Ten goals in the last two games is an impressive feat. If the offense stays strong then we could be tough to handle.

4. Zwangzug

Zwangzug stopped a good Jeruselem side cold and continues to heat up after thier loss to Wentland. They've got the team who should be the weakest of the remaining lot. Another win and they're in their second straight semifinals.

3. Errinundera

The Porotoroos, like Zwangzug below them can advance to a second straight semifinals with a win. With wins over Vilita and Northern Bettia in the group stage and the thrashing of Tynelia now they've racked up some nice wins so far.

2. Demot

In this cup they beat Bazalonia 3-1, Turori 4-1 and now Ariddia 4-1. When they're on they're great. Even their loss was a 3-2 loss to Commerce Heights. That's a strong run. With as good as Elves Security Forces have been in recent cups it's hard to believe that Demot will go into that game as honest-to-goodness favorites, but they will.

1. Bettia

The only unbeaten team left, they also have a win over another team still alive. Couple that with a win over an Alasdair I Frosticus team who looked good in qualifying and the win over Squornshelous and you have your standard Bettian power squad. Although it's still a long way away I'm sure Bettia fans are starting to get dreams about once again winning the title away from Ariddia. And if you had to choose one team to do it they'd definitely be the one. They got some fortunate upsets in the second round. This could be their third title.

Amda-Mo: So you're picking them to win it all?

Lur-Mn: I'm making no such predictions. I'm just saying that they're looking good.

Amda-Mo: Well we'll find out just how good firsthand as we battle them in the premier match of the quarterfinals a rematch of the World Cup 33 championships. Please join us back here then. Good night.

Demot

13-10-2007, 19:38

"Man, we just beat Ariddia!" excalimed an estatic Rahall Lewis.

"I know, you lot did exactly as I instructed and we took care of the best team in the world like they were debutants." explained the calm Masteron.

"Yeah, I know, but how the heck did we do it? I mean, when we started qualifying, our squad was absolutely horrendous. Now that we somehow qualified, we're just strolling along like nobodies business. That was the freaking defending champions coach. I scored TWICE on the champions!"

"Calm down Rahall. It's all the wahoo wahu."

"The wahoo wahu?"

"Yes, the wahoo wahu."

"... what the hell is the wahoo wahu?"

"Everything and nothing."

"What now?"

"It's everything and nothing. It means to let go of all your worries and just let life be. That is the wahoo wahu."

"And how does this relate to the change of pace?"

"I told you just to have fun and let things take care of themselves, and the wahoo wahu did so."

"Right, so are we going to prepare for the Marauders?"

"Go bowling."

"You've gone crazy coah."

"Maybe, but I'll still outbowl you."

Adihan

14-10-2007, 04:53

RP cutoff.

Ladies and gentlemen, your World Cup 37 quarter-final results (http://forums.jolt.co.uk/showpost.php?p=13132965&postcount=33).

Oliverry

14-10-2007, 08:13

OOC: I might be out, but I have a storyline to complete

IC:

At Centre Athlétique de Ville-Royale, away game for Marsh Township FC vs. CA Ville-Royale

Joeseph Rescotte: This Javier Jaques is getting annoying. Third time he tackles hardly one of my players and he gets no card.

Tom Pensée: I agree with you. He's really a sucker. I wonder why Ville-Royale decided to get him.

Joeseph Rescotte: To do such things... EST-CE QUE LES MAUDITS PHYSIOS POURRAIENT ALLER RENCONTRER BOUCHARD? See Tom? When you have to yell at your physios, there is a problem on the club.

Tom Pensée: We're losing 0-2 after 82 minutes... I should get to bed now, it's late.

Joeseph Rescotte: It's only 15:00. I knew you were a pansy.

Tom Pensée: YOU are the pansy. We are never going to come back from this scoreline.

Joeseph Rescotte: That's what you think, eh? Let me fix something now... Official MacKay, I substitute #46 for #10.

Official Steve MacKay: Alright *holds panel stating a substitution*

Joeseph Rescotte: Jordan, look. You're going to be the fourth striker. Tell Hugo to play as Forward Centre Left, you're going to play Centre Right. Also tell them we're now all-out-attack. GO!

*Jordan Kelly runs to the field while Jason Lemay goes to the locker room*

Joeseph Rescotte: Bonne job Jason. Look at what is going to happen Tom!

After the game, in the locker room

Tom Pensée: JE PEUX PAS Y CROIRE!! ON L'A FAIT!

Joeseph Rescotte: Je te l'avais dit!

*Joeseph high-fives Tom*

Joeseph Rescotte: Great job guys! We did it! We fought back during the last 15 minutes and tied the game 2-2. I wanted better commitment from you all for the complete duration of the game, but what you did was great at the end of the game. Now, we have to build on that!

Later, in Joeseph's car

Tom Pensée: WOOHOO!!

Nicolas Pensée: I cannot belive I went to a game with you guys. You bore me so much...

Joeseph Rescotte: How come? We are great, eh Tom?

Tom Pensée: Of course. See brother? YOU bore us!

Nicolas Pensée: I don't. YOU are boring me!

Joeseph Rescotte: Stop crying like crybabies both of you. Now, let me raise the volume of the radio, I guess I've just heard something.

Radio: ... the Oliverrian national soccer team. The favourites in the race to managership are supposed to be Dwayne McPherson, Daniel Thériault and the only female manager currently in the Première Ligue, Marie Vendale. A decision is to be expected in the next days, as the AOS said that a press conference was to be called in 5 days. Stay tuned to OBC Radio 1 as we...

*Joeseph's cellphone rings*

Joeseph Rescotte: Allô?

Jules Carrier: Joeseph Rescotte s'il-vous-plaît?

Joeseph Rescotte: C'est moi-même. Who are you?

Jules Carrier: I'm Jules Carrier, vice-president executive of the Association Oliverrienne de Soccer. How are you doing?

Joeseph Rescotte: Fine. So what bad comment did I say this time?

Jules Carrier: I'm from the executive, not from the disciplinary sector. You said nothing in fact that could make us angry. And it's not our job right now to manage what the Première Ligue managers say about the referees' job, it's to the Première Ligue to do so.

Joeseph Rescotte: Alright. So why are you calling me then?

Jules Carrier: Are you in your car right now?

Joeseph Rescotte: Yeah, I'm driving to our hotel room in Ville-Royale, Rue de la Castellaise. Why?

Jules Carrier: You might want to stop.

Joeseph Rescotte: Alright... if I ever find a parking lot... [10 seconds break] Ok! I'm stopped. What's the news?

Jules Carrier: You won't believe it... The board choss you as the Manager for the national team. Do you agree?

Joeseph Rescotte: I cannot believe you. I'm sure this is some kind of prank call.

Jules Carrier: It is not. If you want a proof, look at the number calling you...

*Joeseph looks... 1-426-652-1093*

Joeseph Rescotte: Ah! The secret number of the AOS. I agree! But first, let me ask you a question: Why me?

Jules Carrier: Because, well, to be honest, you seemed like the best candidate. If you wonder why I called you on your cellphone, I tried to reach you at the Stade, but you were already gone.

Joeseph Rescotte: Look: let me fully realise what's going on and call me back tomorrow afternoon, ok?

Jules Carrier: Ok. Salut

*clicks on end*

Joeseph Rescotte: Guys! You won't believe it! I've just been named... ah! you won't believe it...

Tom Pensée: It was a call from the AOS?

Joeseph Rescotte: Yeah... they named me as the manager of the national team!

Nicolas Pensée: Menteur! A pansy cannot be named. Joe-seph is a pansy!

Joeseph Rescotte: Will you shut up, Nicolas? I cannot believe it myself...

Jeruselem

14-10-2007, 11:59

Dazza:
I'm Dazza Dallas and this is Top Gear Jeruselem! Well, you should have figured that out from the opening graphics with the cars and that naked dancing girl.

Abe:
Yes, this show is dedicated to Dinkie Dosha. A champion Jeruselem World Cup player who played in four World Cups who died tragically recently. She was tragically found by Dazza's daughter in a swimming pool, just hours before she could return home. To the family of Dinkie Dosha, especially the two kids - this show is for you.

Garry:
Now, let us have one minute of silence for Dinkie Dosha. An unnecessary death, and I think she would have played her fifth cup.

<One minutes silence>

Dazza:
I have admit I didn't take this well. Dinkie wanted to be the new Dazza Dallas and now she's died before me. It's not fair, she had so much ahead of her. It will just make us stronger, more determined to win this cup. The death of Rashina Dallas hurt but this one hurts more, the army is a dangerous occupation but drowning is not the way to die either.

Abe:
We'll have a state funeral soon for Dinkie, God bless her soul ... I think all the Jewish and football community should be there.

Dazza:
On todays show. I show people what cars are the best for backseat action! So everyone can be the most pleasurable driving experience in the back and front seats. Don't miss this one, as well it involves a little bit of nudity.

Garry:
I roadtest the world's toughest 4 wheel drive. It's a big mean monster which eats the competition for breakfast, but it is what they say it is? It is a big noisy mouse or it is a real man's outdoor machine?

Abe:
I investigate what strange machines those funny people who take care of those football fields drive. You see Dazza and fellow players run out on those lush fields, but it takes a strange breed to maintain those fields.

Dazza:
And we'll provide some handy practical tips how to save fuel while you're driving. So let's started with ... err, backseating driving!

<Cuts to scene>

Dazza naked in a limosine ...
"Oh hello! This is a limosine. A car for the rich and famous like me! It huge here, with a minibar and entertainment equipment. These things don't come cheap but they are the ultimate car for backseat driving. The chaffeur drives for you, and you have time in the back to have fun! Heck, did I put clothes on ... nope. For most people, you can't afford one of these with the leather interior, spring loaded cushions and other beaut stuff. I'lll show you affordable cars which can help you score on those dates. Yes, Dazza naked on TV again. I think that's why they hired me."

Sel Appa

14-10-2007, 17:20

OOC to Erri: (NOT AN RP)
Penalty Scorers:
Miquelinho
Ghotiolo
Sitran
Patette
Gepardo (missed)

Use them in any order and use Gepardo if you want me to have a miss. In-game scorers don't matter.

Az-cz

14-10-2007, 18:36

Amda-Mo: And with a heart stopping win the Gnomes have finally made it back to the semifinals.

Lur-Mn: What a great game. While it doesn't make up for the loss back in Shangri-La it was a great victory and a second semifinals is quite validating for the squad.

Amda-Mo: Take us through what were the keys to pulling out this matchup.

Lur-Mn: Well first and foremost was Ip-Gp. In what was definitely his greatest game of the tournament, he set up Kn-Dg's late equalizer and scored the goal in extra time to send us through. It was a pretty impressive performance on his behalf. His leadership was really key for us.

Amda-Mo: And the defense?

Lur-Mn: Well it's the same two goals we've been allowing but it was a better performance. After the half hour mark we shut them down cold. That's 90 minutes without allowing a goal to Bettia. That's impressive.

Amda-Mo: And those first two goals?

Lur-Mn: Both were good plays by Bettia. One was a bit aided by Bu-Luv but both were good plays. But we got our focus back and held on after that. It was absolutely a possibility that we'd fold up, but the team didn't panic and fought back well.

Amda-Mo: How does this effect Zax-Im's coaching spot?

Lur-Mn: It's locked in. He shifted up to a different formation and the team has responded with some mega offensive performances. He did a great job at the start of qualifying and figured out a way to get the team out of a lull to a height only the legends of Hawdon and coach Khim have taken them too.

Amda-Mo: With Bettia vanquished we can now look forward to two more games no matter what. So lets look at our next round's opponent.

Lur-Mn: Well our next opponent is an opponent very familiar to us in Sel Appa. We've faced them in three different qualifiers, including these ones. We split in qualifiers but we've changed a lot since then. It'll be interesting to see how they deal with the extra striker. But like us they showed some serious offense in the quarters. And unlike us they've also had some strong defensive performances. While we will probably be slight favorites it'll be close. And this cup has definitely not gone the way of the favorites.

Amda-Mo: And what happened on the other half of the bracket?

Lur-Mn: Amazingly a third World Cup entrant made it to the semifinals as Demot dropped Elves Security Forces in another upset to go along with us and Sel pulling upsets. Zwangzug was the only favored team to win as they shutout Cafundeu.

Amda-Mo: So that means that a team who started in the 30s will bring home the cup?

Lur-Mn: It certainly does mean that. And that the three cup stretch without a new champion is over. But only Sel Appa has yet to make the semifinals of this group, so most likely it will be a team taking a next step rather than something totally unexpected.

Amda-Mo: Alright, let's look at the top six. Clearly the four remaining teams are there, but how about the other two spots.

Lur-Mn: Suprisingly I'm only taking one quarterfinal loser here as I'm going with some other team in the sixth spot.

6. Ariddia

I thought about Errinundera and Jeruselem here as well, but in the end Ariddia was simply the sixth best team. They showed their dominance in qualifiers and the group stage. One horrible performance against Demot can't invalidate all that.

5. Bettia

While the Aroras failed to extended their dominance against us and reclaim the cup they still had one hell of and will be right back in the thick of things the next time around. No one should make the mistake of thinking Ariddia or Bettia has gone away.

4. Sel Appa

They continue to get the job done. And while it took every ounce of energy they had to get the job done, win they did. The turtles are showing great heart. I think the famous Sel Appan rapper Whiteflavored Freeze said it best: "Go ninja go ninja go. T-U-R-T-L-E POWER!"

3. Zwangzug

Perhaps struggled more than they should have with Cafundeu but they've now advanced to consecutive semifinals, which is impressive. In many ways they're the team that should be favored going forward based on recent history, however they are the newest of the four nations.

2. Az-cz

I really struggled with where to put us. We clearly had the best quarterfinals win. And that followed two dominant performances, so I almost put us on top. But on the other hand our defense has struggled allowing two goals in every game so far and we looked bad in our first two games, so I nearly put us third or even fourth. But in the end I went right in the middle. Our offense is absolutely steaming right now and that is making us very dangerous.

1. Demot

But our co-bidders are the top team as of now. With the exception of the Commerce Heights hiccup they've been absolutely brilliant. Beating Elves Security Forces is always a win of value and they look great. However with the closeness of the four teams being top only means so much. But being on top is better than being on bottom so Demot is good to go for now.

Amda-Mo: Any predictions?

Lur-Mn: Nope. You know I don't do so. I'll I will say is that I'm rooting for Demot to win their game against Zwangzug.

Amda-Mo: Interesting. Join us back here next time as we find out if they can do so and more importantly who will win our rubber match with Sel Appa.

Zwangzug

15-10-2007, 03:13

Ask a Zwangzug player, later on, to describe a match against Cafundéu, and the answer received will vary from person to person. Roger, in a rare venture into nostalgia, might describe the overwhelming nature of the team that greeted Zwangzug in their first qualification group. So impressive were the Cafundelense media reports that Zwangzug in fact waited for Cafundéu to write theirs first. But times had changed since then, and different memories would resurface. Eddie would describe a quarterfinal victory-in World Cup 36. Andrew, if whoever was asking was lucky, might not respond at all.

Peter had no such memories. For him, the Monopolists were to be approached like any other opponent: carefully but confidently.

Heitor won the ball away from Jacob, and the game was on. The first few minutes looked as if they would herald an attack-focused game. In only the seventh minute, Phillip unleashed a sharp shot, but Toninho brilliantly neutralized it with his knee before passing it to Rato. The ball was barely visible as it rocketed throughout the field, visible to the players who lived at the game's various speeds.

But the players rose to the challenge of defense as well. When Anormal's booming pass reached Heitor, Mal angled over to stop his A. F. F. teammate. When Phillip plunged through the midfield, Souza daringly sprinted forward to make Zwangzug offsides. Bartholomew headed away Flecha's shot, Lauro stymied Simon Ryne. There was no separation of individual plays: they formed a continuous reel of play.

Any advantage would work, if Peter figured out how to use it. Eddie was an offensive midfielder in Dunboor, so maybe he'd be playing up. Peter just had to get into position-there-

And everything came together. Eddie was open, the pass was clean, and Peter tapped it in. One-zero.

The task of holding onto the lead was difficult, of course, but everything blurred after that. Once it was secured, the forwards' job was less important. But it had certainly been so: no astonishing plays, just the simplistic task of knowing when to be where.

It was enough.

Cafundeu

15-10-2007, 20:29

Sunday night in Lasft. CCFM's headquarters. The president of the CCFM, Miguel Jóia, is in a meeting with the Counselor-Minister of Sports Erasmo Carlos Jowenguard, with directors of important football teams of the country and with two legends: the Emperor of Cafundéu and the leader of Globo Multimedia, Marcos Araújo.

MIGUEL - "The World Cup has ended for us. And, although this was our second best campaign in our country's history, part of our population don't know it, because of the satellite incident."

EMPEROR VAN TOCCO - "It's a shame. Cafundéu has a television channel that disputes the title of World's biggest, and it suddenly stops to broadcast news from abroad because its biggest satellite fell."

MR. JOWENGUARD - "Yes. Globo had a lot of time to try to fix the problem, but it didn't. In the end, only the people who paid for the pay-per-view games were able to see the World Cup."

FRANCISCO DOURASD (president of the players' sindicate) - "Our population lost the opportunity to see our team playing. What do you have to say, Mr. Araújo?"

ARAÚJO - "I do apologize. I'm frustrated that this happened, but we couldn't fix the satellite or send a new one to the space."

MICHELLE LISKS (director of Central United) - "Can you say why?"

ARAÚJO - "Our main technician was travelling. He was in Porto Lacruz."

MIGUEL - "I can't believe in what you're saying. So, citizens of our country were unable to watch our National Team in the World Cup just because your technician took a break and went to the beaches of Porto Lacruz? Why didn't you hire a new one?"

ARAÚJO - "It's in the contract. If I hire another technician, he'll leave the job and I'll have to pay a fine."

DOURASD - "Does he deserve this clause?"

ARAÚJO - "Yes he does. He is one of the best in the world."

MR. JOWENGUARD - "Arguably."

ARAÚJO - "Why arguably?"

MR. JOWENGUARD - "Someone that goes to the beach when his company needs him can't be considered so good."

EMPEROR VAN TOCCO - "This is already past. The World Cup has ended for our National Team."

ARAÚJO - "But the satellite will be ready in time for the final."

WELLINGTON JUÇABA (director of Ranca Toco) - "At least Globo Multimedia will show one game."

EMPEROR VAN TOCCO - "Well, let's talk about the future of our National Team. In this World Cup, we had, again, a bad campaign in the qualifiers, and two wins and two losses in the proper World Cup."

MR. JOWENGUARD - "Schiavonia losing its place in the oitavas-de-final was surprising for me."

JONAS BIGODINHO (director of Galáxia) - "For us all. Finally luck was on our side."

MIGUEL - "In the end, a good campaign for the Monopolists, losing again to Zwangzug, which is a good team too. Now we must start the preparations for the next cup."

MR. JOWENGUARD - "First of all, Braddock must continue. He showed to us that he is the best coach of our country."

DOURASD - "But Sodré signed a contract with SC Lasft, so we don't have an assistant coach."

EMPEROR VAN TOCCO - "We need one."

MR. JOWENGUARD - "We have some options. First, Ganz Ijak, the best player ever of Cafundéu, who wants to work with Braddock. His presence can motivate the players. Second, the coach of Khalmar-Tijhus Eduardo Bosschaart, who showed talent, conquering good results in a minor team. And the last one is Jason Fowler, from Jeruselem. He worked in Cafundéu for many years, as coach of some Second Division teams and finally Penders, before leaving to coach the Qazox National Team."

EMPEROR VAN TOCCO - "Have you decided?"

MR. JOWENGUARD - "Yes. We'll choose Ijak."

MIGUEL - "I disagree. He has no experience as a coach. I'd prefer Bosschaart."

MR. JOWENGUARD - "I have decided."

MIGUEL - "But I'm the president of the CCFM."

MR. JOWENGUARD - "And I am the Counselor-Minister."

MIGUEL - "Now I see that my position as president of the CCFM means nothing. I resign."

EMPEROR VAN TOCCO - "So be it. The Counselor-Minister will return to be the president of the CCFM after many years."

MR. JOWENGUARD - "And I accept the job. It'll be good to return to be the leader of the CCFM."

ARAÚJO - "And who will take Jowenguard's job?"

EMPEROR VAN TOCCO - "Director of the National Teams? Let me see... take it for you. But all your decisions must be approved by Jowenguard."

ARAÚJO - "Thanks, Emperor."

MR. JOWENGUARD - "Now to the next issue..."

Demot

15-10-2007, 23:42

"You have got to be freaking kidding me. We just humbled the Marauders, again!" Rahall Lewis excalimed, as he and Masteron met once again after another shocking result.

"Didn't I tell you to believe in the wahoo wahu?"

"Well, yeah, but ... urr... who cares? We WON the FREAKING match!!!"

"... I still outbowled you."

"You're our freaking coach now David, shouldn't you be preparing us for the semi-final against Zwangzug. We havn't been past the round of sixteen since we finished third in thirty three! We need your guidance man."

"... I was apart of that squad. Man those were the days. You know, that was only our fourth tournament? It was still pretty much the same group of lads and lasses who entered our first. Ah, good times."

"Uh-huh, now what about preparing for the game?"

"Rahall, at this point of the tournament, you're either ready or not, and if you're not, we'll lose. If you guys are, we'll win, and move on and perhaps win a title. All that matters is the passage mate, not the soon to be, which is why I've been trying to get you guys to buy into the wahoo wahu."

"You have a point, I guess. But shouldn't we at least be doing some basic drills to keep fresh?"

"If you think it will help. Alright, gather everyone together, we're going ice skating!"

Jeruselem

16-10-2007, 00:48

Kate: Hikfie, what's the sad face?
Hikfie: I can't play on the same team as my man.
Kate: Why is that? Because you're a woman?
Hikfie: Because they have one foreign player, and can't have two.

Kate: So they don't want poor little Hikfie!
Hikfie: Well, my man does but the club had found a problem with the transfer. Most people in the club don't have an issue, it's just those old people who like to make people's lives bad.
Kate: Poor Hikfie.
Hikfie: I want to be with my man!

Kate looks at her stomach ... and has an idea

Kate: Oi, what happens if you get married like Skate here.
Hikfie: Married? That's a big thing!
Kate: Yeah, get married to that Bostopian Peter Jeffers fella and well you're not a foreign player!
Hikfie: But it's a big thing to get married,

Kate: Hey, look at me. Baby in the tummy, and I'm 18! Come on Hikfie!
Hikfie: I suppose it would work.
Kate: Hey you are a World Cup player, so there is excuse.
Hikfie: What about the wedding?

Kate: Look get married first, have the wedding later. I'll pay for your wedding.
Hikfie: You don't have to.
Kate: Get yourself married, simple. It's what you want in the end.
Hikfie: What if he says no?

Kate: Look at you, good looking girl ... a DALLAS girl. Who can say no! OK, you're not the brightest thing around.
Hikfie: OK, I'll try it.
Kate: Good girl, soon you'll be just like me! (pats stomach)
Hikfie: I'll never be as smart as you Kate. I'm a simple girl.

Kate: You're just different there.

OOC - This was OKed by Bostopia

Demot

16-10-2007, 01:41

In a small room inside the DFA headquarters in Skyhaven, a short man with long red hair, glasses, and a nametag that said "E. Jackson" sat in his cubical. He was hard at work finalizing information for the bid for hosting rights of the next Cup, when a rather tall man with sleek black hair arrived.

"Esante, you know, our football team has wretched kits! They are an eyesore to all footy fans in the world. We can't go playing in a semifinal with such raggedy uniforms."

"Don't worry Miguel, I've already taken care of it."

"Really? How'd you manage that?"

"Well Masteron and Junga came to me before the Proper, and told me that the squad was going to need new kits for the next tournament, espicailly if we somehow won hosting rights. I mean, who wants hosts with kits that make you cringe right?

Well anyway, I contacted the famous JMC kitmakers in Krytenia, and had them prepare a set of kits for the next tournament, but seeing as how we've made it to the semifinal, I sent Masteron the new jerseys for the last two matches. Here, I still have one of each."

http://i25.photobucket.com/albums/c58/Krytenia/DEM38.png

"I have to say, you really outdid yourself this time Esante, the lads will be looking good while representing Demot out there on the pitch. Speaking of which, the game starts in three hours, you heading down to Marl's?"

"Yeah yeah, I'll meet you there, just as soon as I answer a few questions people are asking about our WC software."

Adihan

17-10-2007, 11:40

A rather belated RP cutoff for the World Cup semifinals, for which I apologise, Legal's still away and my keyboard's been wonky, as well as classes starting up again.

Zwangzug

17-10-2007, 19:08

Andrew had tried to warn the team that it wouldn't be an easy game. While it might look like a mismatch on paper, he knew that Zwangzug had sprung its share of surprises. Zwangzug vs. Demot, the previous cup's surprise semifinalists taking on...It didn't matter. He focused on the match yet to play.

Zwangzug took the lead in the first half: Jacob dug out a long pass from Mal and relayed it to Peter, who sent it in. The fragile lead remained at the half, and victory was visible, its outline faintly emerging from the darkness.

Just after an hour into the game, Simon Ryne had a chance to increase the scoreline. He skirted Falls, careful to avoid being offsides; then, once the pass from Roger came in, moved forward and shot.

But Orien was there, catching the shot and quickly throwing it downfield. The ball scattered the Zwangzug players: they ran randomly, unsure of where it would fall. Moving with athletic grace, Rahall Lewis took possession and dribbled it past a beleaguered Bartholomew, shooting it in to tie the score. There was more to the Dynamo than new uniforms.

The game was suddenly new again, but in miniature: neither side could break through in the last half hour, and all too soon full time was called. A one-all tie, following the one-nothing win against Cafundéu...but there was still more to play.

In extra time, Andrew essentially abandoned the title of defender, joining the midfielders in launching a ferocious attack. Win or lose, he wanted the game over with before the clock ran out.

But thirty more minutes passed, and the score was still tied. As David Masterson confidently encouraged Demot for the tiebreaker, the Zwangzug players stood around, confused.

"Okay, folks," Mcgimpy called, waving them over. "I'd been hoping it wouldn't have to come to this, but I've drawn up a list..."

"Of wut^" Phillip asked.

"Penalty takers."

"But tha ¬fowld?"

Mcgimpy winced. Eddie eagerly began explaining the details as the coach gave the order. "Olson, you're first. Barons, second. Third, uh...Barnes, you."

"¬Y a forward^"

"You and Vanderpent move around too much. Penalty kicks are simple, direct, put the ball in the goal. Or try. That being said, Vanderpent, you've looked good today, so you get the spot."

"And fifth?" Andrew asked.

Mcgimpy grinned at him. "Guess who?"

"This," he said, "is the most farcical event of my life."

Demot won the coin toss and kicked first. Thoril Forgedawn looked somewhat confused, but only for a second: his well-aimed shot went directly into the center of the goal.

Simon Ryne was up next, his usual arrogance muted. Focusing hard, he stared down at the ball, then abruptly unleashed a kick that flew into the top corner, out of Orien's reach.

Lea Conner took the Dynamo's second kick. Carefully but powerfully, she sent the ball forward. Two-one.

Jacob wearily looked down at the ball. I can't do this, he seemed to mouth.

"You can't do it alone," Roger echoed.

The captain hadn't realized he'd spoken aloud. "What?"

"Take your shot, then you'll see."

He waited a few seconds, clearing his mind, and then powered the ball forward. This time, however, Orien had correctly guessed where it would go, and was there to make the save.

Jacob turned back, and Roger hurriedly waved him over for a discussion that continued past Maria Hart's easy goal and Eddie's shot that hit the post. If Demot could score again, they would win.

Edmund Vorca set up for the kick.

Then the noise came. From the huddle, the two midfielders let out a roar: a meta-anthem, perhaps, but in the stadium it was hard to tell. Regardless, they drew on reserves of breath, weaving incomprehensible harmonies, and didn't let up. When one needed to take another breath, the other compensated by getting even louder.

It seemed they wouldn't stop, so, reluctantly, Vorca shot...

...and it hit the crossbar.

Phillip's shot was wide, but to Jacob and Roger, it hardly mattered.

Jeruselem

18-10-2007, 00:03

Voiceover: FOX NEWS JERUSELEM! THE VOICE OF THE PEOPLE

Man:
I'm Sham Hammity, Fox new commentator. Today's topic is the World Cup 37. I'm with Jeruselem team captain Kate Dallas or Princess Katherine Alexandra Dallas and our resident female commentator Ann Shoulder.

Kate: Nice to be here.
Ann: (Mumbles something no one can understand)

Man:
We are to here to ask, is the World Cup a total waste of time?

Ann:
well, since we've never been able to win it once - we should give up and put our efforts into righting the moral degradation of Jeruselem society.

Kate:
Ann is wrong, it's a matter of national pride. In the past, we invaded other nations with armies to provide our sport but that's not the sort of thing we like to these days.

Ann:
Don't listen to a woman who spends most of her time being a slut like her mother. Most people agree with me, football is a waste of time and we should invest into make your society back to what is used to be. Football is for commies, lefties, whores and liberals who want to ruin Jeruselem. Like our princess here.

Man:
I've seen society change for the worse. Girls having kids younger, women being too empowered, too much pornography available, men losing respect and power and the erosion of Christian values. Actually, we can blame people like you and especially your mother. Football is too big, too much money, too much influence and too much part of our lives in Jeruselem. We should be looking at fixing this imbalance. And that disgusting Dazzi video game too, based on you too. Video games are bad for our kids.

Kate:
Sham - Jeruselem is a society which is not Christian. It's the Jewish, Christian and Islamic live together. We aren't a Christian state. As for your opinions of the current society, you and Ann want to go back the days when women stayed at home with the kids and shut up. Sorry, women are now equal partners in our society. Look, Ann is here expressing an opinion - something that would not happen under the old society. Stay with the times Sham, videos are here to stay.

Ann:
Kate is right in some ways but her family of whores is not a good role model. Our women are too loose and don't respect the old values anymore, we need to go back to what was good about the past. When football was a sport, not some kind of religion. Your mother is a sort of Goddess in football with that nudity obsession you seem to inherit. Getting knocked up and not knowing who the father is most of the time.

Kate:
Ah yes, the good old days. Wait - the same old days when our football team couldn't buy a qualification spot in a World Cup, when men visited the same whorehouses my grandmother worked in, when women were told to be quiet because it upset the men and women on TV were a novelty. Yes, good days to return to.

Ann:
We had respect then, no one called our women whores or harlots. People think all Jeruselem women are like your mother. All football women are whores.

Kate:
Ann, we had no profile then. The only reason we have any kind of profile is because the efforts of our football teams. Before then we were just a bunch of religions nogheads with a lousy football team. Football women are just like any women, they have families and kids - they are just like everyone else. Oh wait, you don't have kids there Ann.

Man:
It's better to be a country respecting God than a nation of reputed whores like your Dallas clan. Good women don't play football and sleep their way to the top like you did. You're just a dirty schoolgirl who entrapped our future King, using the sinful skills learnt from your parents and grandparents.

Kate:
A fox news ambush. Let's attack little preggy Kate. I've seen the ratings, no one watches Fox News - they think JGN despite it's pro-government bias is more balanced. You just want to raise controversy to get ratings. Honestly, me in a bikini on holiday gets more ratings than Fox news. I've got better things to do than talk to vultures.

Ann:
BITCH! (attacks Kate ... moves back after a Katana held by Kate is at her neck)

Kate:
As I said, vultures. Guards, she tried to assault a member of the royal family - take her away.

Man:
That's it from Fox New Jeruselem. We'll be trying get Ann Shoulder out of gaol, soon ... oh, sorry about that Kate. Ann has problems with other women ranked above her social ranking especially little bimbos like you. She has fits of violence.

Kate:
I'm prepared! What's the canteen food like here, I'm hungry ... all the time.

Man:
The food across the road is much safer. Let me finish this last news thing, I'll take you to the best Chinese place.

Kate:
Right, oh!

Oliverry

18-10-2007, 00:49

*Phone rings*

Joeseph Rescotte: Allô?

Mysterious Guy: Hi Joeseph. How are you doing?

Joeseph Rescotte: I'm doing pretty nicely. Who are you?

Mysterious Guy: I'm going to reveal that at the end of the call. Are you happy with your new job?

Joeseph Rescotte: You mean my jobs, with an "s", right?

Mysterious Guy: Yeah, haha.

Joeseph Rescotte: I'm surprised. But, the question still arises: Are you the one who was supposed to call me but forgot to?

Mysterious Guy: Yes... now, you force me to reveal who I am... I am Roger Parizeau.

Joeseph Rescotte: QUOI? Are you kidding me?

Roger Parizeau: Why do you think you had these jobs?

Joeseph Rescotte: I'm still wondering...

Roger Parizeau: Look, let me explain everything now: I have been planning to retire at the end of the current World Cup for the last two years. L'AOS then asked me if I had any idea of who could replace me. I told them I had no idea, but that I would search. One day, about 6 months ago, I've been to a Marshalliston United match, in case a player would interest me for the National Team. But it was you that I noticed. Still here, Joeseph?

Joeseph Rescotte: Yeah

Roger Parizeau: Alright. When I noticed yourway of working, I was wondering "What could he do with a better team?". The answer came quickly, as you won that game 6-0.

Joeseph Rescotte: Ah yeah, that game against Marshalliston FC.

Roger Parizeau: Great to see you remember about that. Well, starting there, I lobbied in order for you to get chosen as the new manager of the National Team. Of course, first, to be a credible choice, you had to be in the Première Ligue. As I had resigned from Île-Royale PFC, I could lobby to get the manager I wanted at the team I wanted.

Joeseph Rescotte: You could have called me earlier?

Roger Parizeau: No, I couldn't. I wasn't even sure if l'AOS would agree with my choice.

Joeseph Rescotte: So my job at Marsh Township FC was depending on that choice by the AOS...

Roger Parizeau: Almost. In fact, once they told me you were in the race to get the job, I called you to let you know about that job. I would have offered you another one, but there were no other job available. My influence is so big that, when I told their board about you, they accepted immediately. In fact, they told me you were already on their list to get the job.

Joeseph Rescotte: Thanks to tell me. I didn't know some Première Ligue clubs were sincerely interested by me.

Roger Parizeau: No need to thank me. Then, once you got the job, I was supposed to tell you what were my intentions, but I had no time, as the AOS was still unsure about you. After some lobbying, they finally accepted to have you as the manager of the National Team and, now, I call you to explain this to you and congratulate you for the job.

Joeseph Rescotte: Thank you. But I'm going to thank you for the job, as you did most of the job... wait, you want me to pay you or something, eh?

Roger Parizeau: Hehe no. This is no mafia. In fact, it's simply that I think you're one of the best managers ever in Oliverry.

Joeseph Rescotte: Thank you Roger. I needed these explanations to secure myself into the job. Now, I'll be able to fulfill the requirements and make the team play up to the expectations.

Roger Parizeau: If you need any help, don't hesitate to contact me.

Joeseph Rescotte: I will. Bye.

Novapsolu

18-10-2007, 03:21

RP cutoff for the Third Place Match.

Jeruselem

18-10-2007, 04:55

Kate (wearing a shirt with an Intel style "Bubs inside"):
Welcome, this is THE FOOTBALL LIFE - the World Cup 37 finals edition! I'm Princess Katherine Alexandra Dallas or just Skate.

Dazza (wearing a shirt "Princess Mother"):
Normally, Dinkie Dosha would be here but she's not. We miss her and well, so do the rest of the team so you have put up with the Bike and Skate for this show.

Kate:
Our special guests are Kate Bush the Jeruselem coach, Abrams Tunk the Jeru FC coach, Mosha Dosha who is Dinkie's husnband and co-owner of the Jerusalem United, and under 21 coach Monique Alexander.

Dazza: Mosha, how is the family handling the death of Dinkie?
Mosha: Not well, but we have to one day. The kids are always crying for their mother, and I can't bring her back.
Dazza: We miss her too.
Mosha: I know, it's like you losing Rashina Dallas last cup but we have to move on. Dinkie didn't want us to be sad, she wants us to make the best of things as they are.

Kate: World Cup 37 final, and no Jeruselem again due to ... Zwangug. (doesn't look happy)
Dazza: Kate doesn't like that nation, they wrecked this and last cup she was in. If we say ZZ, you know what we talking about.
Monique: I have something here which will cheer her up! It's the under 21 cup my girls won in St Samuel!

Everyone looks at the cup

Dazza: Well, that's the last cup we've won since Women's World Cup 5.
Kate: Hopefully, we'll have the real cup soon in four years.
Dazza: Right it's Demot vs Az-cz! This is the second final for Az-cz, but the first final for Demot. Let's have some opinions here!

Kate: Gnomes to win very well.
Mosha: Demot, like 1-0.
Kate Bush: Gnomes, in a close one
Abrams Tunk: Demot to destroy Gnomes
Monique: Gnomes, just

Dazza: Demot in extra time or PKs for little Dazza here. split opinions, 3 ALL for each team and even I disagree with my daughter. There you go!
Kate: I've got this feeling in my belly, it's the Gnomes.
Dazza: Nah, it's just another Dallas in there ... mine's empty. Right, let's now play a tribute to Dinkie Dosha, a Jeruselem World Cup hero who died too young.

Zwangzug

18-10-2007, 13:08

In honor of the Sel Appa match, the rule restricting players' access to "publications from countries other than those in the tournament in which they are currently participating", believed to have been passed in response to distractions caused by a former issue of the Cabbage, was rescinded. But the Zwangzug team would soon learn there was more to Sel Appa than dubious journalism.

The first half, however, was a slow affair. Underestimating the Turtles, Mcgimpy had fielded many of the reserves: the semifinal had emotionally and physically tired most of the starters. Ian unleashed a couple good shots. The first was well fielded by Karli Rengel; the second, off a nice pass from Evan, hit the crossbar. Sel Appa, for their part, looked slightly stronger: their penalty kicks had been a game farther back, and they had recovered somewhat. Ghotolio had the best opportunity, but Jesse headed it downfield.

Not until the seventieth minute could Sel Appa break through. A pass from Mercator V met Miquelinho, who was able to dribble past the defenders and score.

Zwangzug faced an even more formidable opponent, then: the time. The very nature of the game felt disappointing: to have such a continuous, unbroken field marked by a digital clock was an odd juxtaposition. The discrete seconds, perhaps, only mirrored some deeper count.

At any rate-or perhaps just the one rate-the game ended, 1-0.

"Well," Roger said, trying not to think about it, "we finished fourth last cup, right? And what did we do this cup?"

"Finish fourth," Timothy admitted.

"What's improbable about that?"

Timothy reluctantly smiled. "Nothing."

Az-cz

18-10-2007, 17:26

Amda-Mo: And with that the Gnomes have taken the rubber match from Sel Appa 2-1.

Lur-Mn: Hats off to the turtles. They really made us work for the victory today but in the end we just had the best player on the pitch and he made the plays to put us through.

Amda-Mo: Alright let's talk about the early game. Were you suprised the team started so slowly?

Lur-Mn: Yes an no. Clearly it can't be a big suprise as our struggles against Bettia were also in the early part of the game but I expected the team to come out with more fire than they did.

Amda-Mo: Clearly Sel Appa was better early with their 18th minute goal and some other good shots early. When did you start to get a feel that we were taking control.

Lur-Mn: Honestly not until pretty late. Kn-Dg's goal in the 42nd minute came against the run of play so and the turtles had to be displeased not to be ahead at the break. I'd say around the time of El-Iot's shot that was just deflected over the net in the 63rd was when you really started to see the turtles slowing down. But they still fought pretty hard and it still took a great individual effort from Kn-Dg to win the game.

Amda-Mo: How about the defense?

Lur-Mn: Better. Clearly you can't afford to lose track of a player on a free kick like that, but amazingly we've made it to the finals and that was the first game we didn't allow two goals in.

Amda-Mo: Other thoughts on the game?

Lur-Mn: Not especially no. The team played basically the type of game we've come to expect from them since they changed to the 3-5-2. Not as explosive maybe but the same style of game.

Amda-Mo: What happened in the other semi?

Lur-Mn: Demot took a thrilling penalty kick match to advance past Zwangzug.

Amda-Mo: And how does that effect us?

Lur-Mn: Well clearly going to penalties is more draining than winning in 90, but at this level it just doesn't make that big of a difference, so I wouldn't expect that to matter much.

Amda-Mo: Alright, now let's look towards the finals. We couldn't have asked for a more familiar opponent.

Lur-Mn: Certainly not. Counting the finals we'll have played them five times in the last five cups, and we've met them in the AOCAF as well. Considering both nations started back in the World Cup 30 Baptism of Fire that's a lot of matches in a short time.

Amda-Mo: Let's review the history between the two nations.

Lur-Mn: First we were in the same Baptism of Fire. We were the champions while Demot came in fourth. The first time we actually met was in AOCAF 18 where we lost 3-2, however we got our revenge when we hosted World Cup 33 beating them 3-2 in the group stage and 1-0 in the semifinals. In world cup 35 we played to a 1-1 draw which allowed us to move to the second round while they were eliminated. But last cup they finally got a serious measure of revenge wiping the floor with us 3-0. And then there's our bid to host the world cup and this. So it's fair to say we know each other very very well.

Amda-Mo: How does this history effect the match?

Lur-Mn: Well one thing it will do is ensure a friendly match. Both teams respect and like the other so it will be clean if nothing else. We have the long term advantage but they've had the better results as of late. In the end though that won't decide things.

Amda-Mo: So what will decide things?

Lur-Mn: I think it will come down to our defense to be perfectly honest. Since making the change our offense has just been locked in and I think we will find some goals. The question is what will Demot do. They've been playing great and if our defense continues to struggle it will be tough to win. But we've yet to see them really hit the switch. If they can find their peak form, or something close to it we ought to be able to slow Demot down enough to win.

Amda-Mo: Any predictions?

Lur-Mn: Yes. My prediction will be that it will be a close game. I can't see either side winning a blowout. More than that I can't really say.

Amda-Mo: Well join us back here as we try to emulate Lemmitania and avoid turning the duo of disappointment of Audioslavia and Spaam into a trifecta of trauma.

Az-cz

18-10-2007, 17:30

Official announcement from Robber Captain Ug-Mt

I would like to announce that I am declaring a special three day holiday for the world cup finals. The day of the finals as well as the two following days will be government and business holidays. We request that all non-essential services and businesses close for these days. We request two days off to allow for massive celebration should we win and national mourning if we lose. Emergency services and businesses like supermarkets should remain open but everything else will be close.

Robber Captain Ug-Mt

Demot

18-10-2007, 19:30

Demot Daily ~ Team of Destiny?

Well my friends, readers, countrymen, and bored compatriots, how have you been? Has this roller coaster ride that our beloved Dynamo have and continue to pull us along thrown your heart aflutter? Have you been holding your breath with every shot, tackle, save, and cross? I know I sure have, and it has been one hell of a ride not only as a supporter but as a reporter. To think, four matches into qualifying, and it looked like the squad was on their way to becoming another top teir team that somehow stumbled and completely missed the cup Proper. Yet, when the media was refused assess to the team after those early struggles, the squad started clicking on all cylinders, and slowly made their way through the tables and when it all came down on the final matchday, there Demot was, top of the group and moving on into the Proper as a first seed.

And what a wild Proper it was, as Masteron still wouldn't allow the media any access to the players or in the stadiums. Well, though it pained me not to be able to watch my beloved Dynamo in person, I was elated with how the squad was responding to the once philosophical captain's tactics and motivational speeches. Despite a dissapointing loss to the SLANI federation on the final matchday in the group stage, the squad was happy enough to move on. Then when Masteron finally allowed me to interview the squad before the historic match up against the defending champions and world's number one squad in Ariddia, the atmosphere was nearly bliss. Apart from Rahall Lewis, the entire squad was relaxed and just enjoying their ride through the tournament, as it was almost certainly over.

But no, it was not to be the end of this magical trip through the historic competition. Trouncing the number one squad with a four to one scoreline, the wheels of fortune began to turn, and the squad while still relaxed, began thinking that they could make a run and perhaps win the tournament. With former colonial masters, and the very country that taught them the game on the docket, surely this would of been the end. The teacher isn't supposed to fall to the prodigal student, even if they are close in skill, are they? It would seem it is possible, as the Dynamo squeaked through to the semi-finals by the slimmest of margins, two to one and now would take on their fourth straight top ten nation in Zwangzug.

Yet, like the previous two oppenents, Zwangzug would fall as well, this time though, taking the orange and black in their new, and quite stunning I must say, kits, taking them into the dreaded penalty shootout. Forgedawn, Conner, and Hart smacked theirs in, but poor Vorca had his go off the crossbar. Yet it was all well, as Orien saved two and watched as the other flew off to the side, sealing Demot's place in the final, against none other than their WC38 bidding partners Az-cz.

These two nations have a long history together, both coming in during World Cup thirty, and being in the region of Atlantian Oceania. Add to that that they have played against each other several times in various competitions, you get a final between friends and rivals that will hopefully live up to the rest of this topsy turvy tournament. I could go on and on about how the team's match up positionally, how their previous meetings could affect this outcome, but when it all comes down to it, it's all down to the players. It's who wants it most, who has the heart to continue on, and who has the hunger to plow through any obstacle that would stand in their way on the road to their dreams, their glory, and their honor. So I say to you, Dyanmo, supporters, and all of Demot, is it we? Are we the ones to become legend? If so, go and take it!

Do What Is Needed

Article by Rich Baker

Jeruselem

19-10-2007, 04:45

Dazza and Kate Dallas were in the basement digging around for something, when it got colder suddenly. An apparition appeared of a woman. Kate pulled out her Katana, ready for a battle even though it probably couldn't hurt it.

Apparition: It's me Dinkie!

The two women looked at the ghost, well it sorta looked like Dinkie. It was hard to tell with ghosts. Kate looked at the ghost and put her hands through it, no one there.

Kate: God, you are a ghost! What are you doing here?
Dinkie: I followed you on the plane when you were flying home. It's easy to get plane trips when you're a ghost.
Dazza: But Dinkie, why are you a ghost? You should be with the saints and angels.
Dinkie: I didn't die by accident, I was murdered. My soul cannot rest until you find my killers.

Kate: You were murdered?
Dazza: Oh God! Can you tell us who?
Dinkie: Not really, some men picked me up and tried to throw me over. I grabbed the rail but they made sure I fell. I didn't see them.
Kate: Don't worry, we'll be on the case.

Dazza: So, where are you going be? You can go anywhere.
Dinkie: I'll just stay at your place, I could go home but I don't want to upset the family. I'll freak them out. I figured you two could handle it.
Kate: Who can see you?
Dinkie: Only you two, I don't know why.

Dazza: So you're going wonder around my place all day, bored.
Dinkie: Well, I do that at home when I was alive so it's not a problem.
Kate: Don't knock things over, and upset the kids here.
Dinkie: I won't. I'll just look at your junk and see I can you find stuff.
Dazza: Seen a small cup with Women's World Cup 5 on it?

Dinkie: You mean the one in green box in the corner?
Dazza: Hey, there it is!
Kate: well, don't worry. We'll work on it! Err, attending your own funeral?
Dinkie: Yeah, I can hitch a lift with you lot?

Dazza: God, taking Dinkie to her own funeral ... this is weird.
Kate: And took two Dinkies home, dead and a ghost.
Dinkie: Sorry about the trouble.
Kate: Anything for you. Do tell if you find rats.

<Later>

Kate: Dinkie!
Dinkie: Yes?
Kate: The Gnomes won the World Cup 37!
Dinkie: I'd thought that would happen the day I died, wait I am dead!

Az-cz

19-10-2007, 09:08

Amda-Mo: Unbelievable. The team really came through putting up a 3-1 scoreline to beat Demot and claim our first title.

Lur-Mn: I'm just so ecstatic. I'm so happy for the players and coaches and this firmly cements us a great team. Two finals in our first 8 cups and a title is pretty impressive. And considering all our other athletic accomplishments we've truly shown that Gnomes can play sport.

Amda-Mo: Indeed we can. Now lets get to the review.

Lur-Mn: Well we fell behind early, as seems to be our modus operandi for this tournament where we just kept digging ourselves out of holes. Demot made a nice play in the 33rd minute to take the lead and they kept it up towards the half.

Amda-Mo: So how did we recover in the second half?

Lur-Mn: Well Zax-Im made a great decision to bring on EE-Or for Shockey. He really kick started our offense and set up the SoulElf's first goal.

Amda-Mo: Indeed it is a bit amusing that the first elf to taste the cup was actually a Gnome.

Lur-Mn: Sure was. EE-Or continued to be key as he put us ahead in the 72nd but Demot kept on fighting. They earned a penalty in the 79th but Bu-Luv made the save and you could really sense it then. Kn-Dg scored the final goal in the 88th and capped just an incredible world cup. He was unquestionably the player of the tournament, and if he retires as is expected he will go out as successfully as possible.

Amda-Mo: Let's put aside next cup for now and not worry about retirements and what not, lets just celebrate an incredible victory.

Lur-Mn: Ok.

Amda-Mo: Lets talk about Zax-Im's coaching job. How impressive is it that he was able to realize that his preferred formation isn't working and switch gears midstream.

Lur-Mn: Zax-Im has clearly silenced all doubters. In the last three cups only Ariddia's been able to send us home. That's impressive. And the way he changed up was great. He's faced a lot of flak from us in the media cause we have such high expectations, but the truth is that he was absolutely brilliant at the end of the cup. He kept his flexibility and he kept his team's head up the whole time and never let them panic. Remember that we had to win five straight games to pull this off after only getting a point at the start. And we fell behind in every game in that stretch, if memory serves.

Amda-Mo: And that encapsules this team. On pure physicality we aren't as good as a lot of these teams but on skill and heart we are always dangerous and for now we are World Champions. I hope everyone is enjoying that phrase as much as I am and enjoys their next two days of holiday and celebration.

Hopeless SC

21-10-2007, 06:13

OoC: Congrats to Az-Cz on winning World Cup 37. I hope I don't run into you during qualifying for World Cup 38. ;)

I wanted to get this out there for people to comment on in advance of World Cup 38 and it's preceding Baptism of Fire in case enough people think it's a too much of a godmod for me to do what I suggest at the end of this post for it to be acceptable, so I can come up with a creative storyline if need be.

IC:

Vice President Bill White: (runs into President Johnson’s office) I’ve found the perfect person to lead our national soccer team.

President Tony Johnson: Who is it?

White: The mayor of Goal City, Brian Peterson, is the perfect fit for Administrator of our soccer academy. His city has prospered under his leadership. Population has doubled, the economy is thriving, and their local soccer team is fast becoming one of the best in the nation.

Johnson: Sounds like we’ve found our man. Good work, Bill. Julia!

Secretary Julia Stevens: (walks in) Yes, President Johnson?

Johnson: I want you to help draw up an offer to Goal City mayor, Brian Peterson to be the Administrator of our national soccer academy. And send for my economist, Richard Green. We need him here to help hammer out how many soccer balls this is going to cost us.

Stevens: Right away, Mr. President. (she leaves the office as the President and Vice President check out her swaying hips)

White: I haven’t quite found the right coach yet, but I told Peterson to come in with some suggestions, even to bring in an international coach if that’s what’s best.

Johnson: It might cost a little more, but if we end up looking only moderately hopeless on the field rather than completely hopeless sooner, then I’m all for it.

Stevens: (from outside the office) A Brian Peterson here to see you, Mr. President!

Johnson: Send him in.

Brian Peterson: Hello, Mr. President. My name is Brian Peterson. I was told to drop by to inquire about the position of National Soccer Academy Administrator.

Johnson: Yes, I found out about you just a couple minutes ago from my Vice President, William White, whom I understand you’ve already met.

Peterson: Yes sir, Mr. President. The Vice President was the one who told me to come in today.

White: And we thank you for joining us, Mr. Peterson. Did you come up with a list of names like I asked?

Peterson: Not really, sir. I came up with someone I think is perfect for the job, but there may be some objections to him.

Johnson: And what are those, Mr. Peterson?

Peterson: Well, Mr. President, a winning team fills the stands better than a high-scoring team does. In our early days as a national team, it’ll be likely that we won’t be scoring many goals, so we’ll have to win matches on defense, so we should have a coach that knows a thing or two about defense. The candidate I’ve located was known in his day as a legendary scorer at the international level, though that was many years ago now.

White: If he scored so much, how does he know anything about defense?

Peterson: I’ve been talking with him, and his late wife was a keeper for their national team, and he’s watched a lot of international soccer since his nation disappeared from the map, so he’s learned a lot about defense. He also knows how to score from long distances, which may be what we’ll need to do to pull off some upsets in World Cup 38.

Johnson: And who is this legendary scorer you’ve spoken to?

Peterson: Have you heard of Alan Belmore?

(Johnson and White groan in agony)

Johnson: Please tell me it’s not him!

Peterson: Don’t worry, it’s not him. He may be the most prolific international scorer for his team since Belmore though.

White: Are you talking about that guy from Praying2God that scored almost half his team’s goals for a team that disappeared after World Cup 29?

Peterson: You know your World Cup history, Mr. Vice President. That’s the man.

White: Ah, crud. What was his name?

Johnson: Oh! I remember who you’re talking about now! Thomas Larson, wasn’t it?

Peterson: That’s correct, Mr. President.

White: He may have learned a lot about defense since his playing days, but can he coach?

Peterson: I believe so, Mr. Vice President. I could tell he knew a lot about defense from his observations. He may be a bit on the old side, but he’s in good shape and can help get our national team on its feet.

Johnson: I sure hope so, Mr. Peterson…for your sake. Julia! Is Mr. Green here yet?

Stevens: (from outside the office) Just walked in the door, Mr. President!

Johnson: Good! Send him in!

Economist Richard “Dick” Green: Good afternoon, Mr. President. I hear you have need of my services.

Johnson: That I do, Dick. If we can hash out an agreement, we’re going to make Goal City Mayor Brian Peterson, here, our National Soccer Academy Administrator, and are going to try and make an initial contact with former Praying2God star scorer Thomas Larson to begin negotiations about being the National Team’s Head Coach.

Az-cz

22-10-2007, 05:46

Roger Levesque: As the original national team coach and co-founder of the dash league I can express how happy I am to be here today for this the final celebration of the Az-cz world cup 37 championship, but as you might have guessed we didn't call this press conference just to celebrate. Alas this is a time to honor those Az-czzers who've decided that the championship was a good time to retire. And many people there are who count among there ranks. I'll introduce the first one and let him handle it from there. He's been the head of the Az-cz football association from day one and the man who's been the steady hand that's built up this program. He's guided us through disappointment and trouble with other nations to this glory championship, but he felt it was time to call it a go. Replacing him will be Juxt-Pat, who was the commissioner of the -League. Please welcome Noz-Tf.

<thunderous applause>

Noz-Tf: It was a hard decision, but these past cups have really taken a lot out of me. It's hard work running a national federation, especially one as big and active as ours. And then there's the fact that we gnomes have a tendency to run our mouths. <laughter from the audience> But it's been an absolutely wonderful 16 years. I treasure my memories of my time as president and the wonderful interactions with foreign countries such as Bazalonia, Demot and Bettia. I wish Juxt-Pat the best of luck as he takes over this community chalked full of crazy characters. Champions of the world baby!!

<the crowd explodes into applause>

Now I'd like to welcome the true leader of all things Az-czid football. He was the first leader on the pitch, the captain who led us to collect our first trophy way back in world cup 30. He suffered a vicious attack which prematurely ended his playing career but he worked through the physical and emotional trauma and came back to become first an assistant coach on our runner up squad in world cup 33 and then head coach from world cup 35-37 culminating with this championship. He believed in himself even when others lost faith in him and he rewarded us all. Please welcome the heart & soul of Az-czid football Zax-Im.

Zax-Im: Thank you for that introduction Mr. president. It has been a tough journey. From that first cup after our Baptism of Fire where we struggled and couldn't beat a good team. To the stabbing in Vilita and then the thrashing we recieved at Bedistan's hands, to the crushing bad luck we got in World Cup 33 at the finals to a trio of disappointments in the quarterfinals it was a hard road. But everyone always knew we were a great team just waiting to break out and win it. And in the end triumph we did. It's been a long ride, but with the exception of the stabbing it's been much more good than bad. I really agonized over this decision but in the end I came to the same conclusion coach Khim did oh so many years ago. Being the coach of an elite nation is draining. I'll admit it was hard for me to hear my good friend Lur-Mn questioning my coaching when we hit struggles. It hurt to hear my name mentioned in danger for losing to a team like Tynelia, a good side in their own right. The standards of coaching in a nation like ours, or like Starblaydia before, are those that it's hard to enjoy even a second round or quarterfinals win. There is a joy that's absent when nothing less than the best is acceptable. So I'm stepping down. But that doesn't mean I'm leaving Az-cz, at least not yet. I'm going to be helping with the U21s, the AOCAF side and be involved in the -League as well. And no matter what guiding my home to a world title will be etched into my brain forever.

<the crowd bursts into applause>

Hmr-Pn: It's pretty crazy to think I'm retiring at 29, but I think it's time. Most of my closest friends on the team are retiring and I've been taking a spot a long time. It's only fair to give some up and coming players a shot to experience what I have. Like Du-Tre as a member of the clerics I'm hoping this will help our league success. It's been a great run. Thanks everyone.

Noz-Tf: Next we have an unlikely hero. When you think of great Az-czzers his name doesn't spring to mind. He'd been firmly planted on the bench before this cup, because he was waiting behind a legend. But he finally got his chance and he stepped up. When he saved the penalty against Demot he pushed the Gnomes much closer to victory. That should be introduction enough for him, the third cleric I've introduced tonight, Bu-Lv.

Bu-Lv: Thank you Noz-Tf. Indeed it had been a long time coming. But that's fair, Gn-Lg was an incredible keeper. He just got unlucky to be deprived his championship ring. This cup has just been incredible for me. The nerves I felt when I first stepped on the pitch in the qualifiers must have shown and we struggled as a defense in most of the matches. But we persevered. If there was a them to our championship that would be it. Clearly I will always be remembered for that penalty save. And you know what, that's ok with me. However unlike my teammates, I'm calling it quits in -League too. I thank all of the fans for their support and this trophy is the final and best piece of hardware I could ask for. Go Robbers!!

<massive applause>

Noz-Tf: Next up is a player who was just a kid way back in World Cup 30. He watched and learned under Pizelkaxrovsky and eventually stepped into his role as team quarterback. He developed his play and learned how to control a game absolutely masterfully. He had matches in this cup where he was the absolute key player. Welcome Ip-Gp

Ip-Gp: This title is for Pizelkaxrovsky. He still is the best player to ever don the pink & green. I learned so much from him and inhertied his spot for both country and club. While I believe I am a good player in my own right, so much of my skill was learned from him, and even then I couldn't duplicate half of what he did. Unfortunately the squad couldn't quite gel around him. But we are where we are now because of him. So I want to thank him and thank all of Az-cz for this. Now I look towards future generations to continue our triumph here.

Noz-Tf: I'm going to pass the mic back to Mr. Levesque for this next introduction.

Roger Levesque: Thank you Noz-Tf. I'm sure you can all guess why I'm doing this one. Yes, it is my son James Levesque. When I was raising him I certainly encouraged him to play soccer, but I never pressured him. We encouraged him to take up many various activities, but watching him develop into both the fine human and incredible soccer player he is makes me so proud. For him to end his career on top of the world is absolutely incredible. Here he is, my son, James Levesque.

<the two hug>

James Levesque: Thanks father. I can remember back to those early days hoping my chance would come to play for the national team. Although I never got to play for my father I got to don the pink & green and that makes me so happy. Listening to the other players here today and comparing their experiences to mine, it's all so incredible. Most of us have been together a long long time, going back to world cup 30 or 31. We've seen so much and watch our nation grow from a little minnow to what I believe is the greatest sporting nation in the world. Now while I don't put myself in the same class as some of the players here today it is great to know that I'm an elite player. There's not much else that can be said abouts one career. When Kn-Dg slotted in that third goal I knew my career was complete. Now it's time to start to work on the third generation of the Levesque legacy. <winks & smiles>

<crowd laughs greatly>

Noz-Tf: Thankfully we're almost at the end. Can you believe the talent we're losing off this squad? Good luck to the next coach, whoever he or she is. We're certainly not going to be leaving the cupboards bare, but we've gotten a case of the munchies, if you follow that metaphor. Now next up is a player who had a bit of an up-and-down career. While some might say he never lived up to his potential, he's the only Az-czzer to score a goal in multiple world cup finals. He was named the man of the match for the win over Demot. Please welcome EE-Or.

EE-Or: I'm not gonna lie. I would've liked to play a bigger role on this squad. Yes, that's right, bigger than man of the match of the finals. <everyone laughs> It has been a rough career for me. I had both highs and lows straight from the beginning. Losing my starting spot in world cup 33 was disappointing and failing to ever get it back stung. Being the best striker in a 3-7-0 formation wasn't ideal either. But that didn't mean that I wasn't good or appreciated. Listen to these names I was competing against: Pizelkaxrovsky, Ip-Gp, Kn-Dg, James Levesque, Seoula Vitakiralski, Stanleyinho. I could continue that list if you'd like. So as you see I was competing for my spot with other great players. But even if I wasn't a starter I continued to get play right up until the end. Even coming from the bench being able to make a contribution is incredible. But there's no point in me hanging on anymore. The team is great hands up front with Seoula and El-Iot and I will leave them to it. But I'll still be in the -League and helping out. We're a family here in Az-cz, and a brilliant family to boot.

Noz-Tf: That brings us to the last retiree. He's the only player who started on both the the Baptism of Fire and World Cup champion squads. He's the leading scorer in Az-cz world cup history. He willed us through the early part of this cup when we were struggling. He captained this squad, and led them to a championship in his first cup with the band. Amazingly he's the fifth Yak Cleric I've introduced tonight. While their time in -League ought to continue their role as the holy fathers of the national team are clearly over. Here he is, your captain and World Cup 37 golden ball winner, Kn-Dg.

Kn-Dg: What an honor. Look at these men gathered here tonight. It's an absolutely brilliant collection of people and footballers. By pushing us to two finals and one championship we've forever etched are names amongst the elite. One championship is good, but a single trip to the finals leaves some teams dubious. Two trips to the finals, and an incredible five straight quarterfinals leaves no doubts about this club. Yes I've been the trigger man, but it was always a team effort. And to go out with so many of my friends and club teammates is just incredible. We've done it. We've done it. Here's to Az-cz, the greatest nation in the world, and here's to us, the best team in the world. We will be stepping away from the team, but we won't ever be leaving.

Noz-Tf: Thank you for that Kn-Dg. For all you've done for this team you are a true national hero. Now everyone let's give a last round of applause for these legends of Az-czid sport.

<The crowd stands up and gives them an incredible ovation>

NationStates Jolt Archive

World Cup 37: RP thread - Page 3