NationStates Jolt Archive

http://i6.photobucket.com/albums/y231/bettia/FAB.jpg

"And welcome back to Tiddles Park in a sunny but cold Gabalfa for what will certainly prove to be Bettia's toughest game so far, as the Aroras take on the mighty Jerusalem. And Bob, it's pretty safe to say that this is a match that's really caught the imagination."

"You're not wrong there Malik. Not only have scores of Bettians and Jerusalemians packed into the national stadium..."

"Jerusalemians?"

"Well you tell me. I don't know, do you? Anyway, not only do we have shedloads of home and away fans here, but if you look over in that corner over to our right, a large number have made the short journey over the border from Nedalia. It seem they like both our nations, and the poor dears can't decide what team to support so they're decked out in both our teams' colours. It certainly is an interesting sight."

"Well isn't that nice? And it's certainly created a good, albeit unique atmosphere in the ground, one that's been buoyed by Bettia's impressive run so far in this competition. A quick glance at the table shows the Aroras sitting proudly on top of group ten with a 100% record, one point ahead of today's opponents. And some would say that they key's to the Arora's success is something we haven't seen in a long time - consistancy."

"Yes, that's true. We've seen some steady performances this time around, as opposed to the hot and cold of the last World Cup. Sure, we haven't seen the overwhelming ATTACK ATTACK ATTACK that we caught glimpses of four years ago, but this steady stream of goals that we're seeing now has at times been a joy to watch, hasn't it?"

"Yes, and probably the main positive to come of this so far has been the emergence of Sonny Sabitha, the young Gabalfa Rovers striker. He's chipped in with four goals out of Bettia's twenty as he's muscled his way into the starting eleven, having started this tournament on the bench. His link-up play with Eri Kuniawan in particular has been especially good - so good in fact that it's just been announced that Rovers have made an offical transfer bid to Perumnasih for his services. The asking price? A cool 30 million Groats."

"Yowch! What I wouldn't give to have THAT kind of money floating around! Mind you, given the way that Butetown steamrollered the league last season, a lot of teams are looking to improve their atacking options, from both home and abroad - it seems the Apex League is going well and truly Takilan. It should make for good viewing!"

"And speaking of good viewing, it looks like the teams are now lining up in the tunnel so now we take you to our commentary team, Amir Bettison and Amir Bin Da'ud..."


Fixtures / Results

Home games shown in bold.

MD01: -
MD02: Cuation W 3-1 (at Southern Island Peaks)
MD03: The Gold TyGrr W 4-2 (Shubunkin Park, Akani Sands)
MD04: Tynelia W 3-1 (Tiddles Park, Gabalfa)
MD05: Seckland W 5-1
MD06: Yafor 2 W 3-1
MD07: -
MD08: Dorian & Sonya W 2-1 (Tiddles Park, Gabalfa)
MD09: Jerusalem (Tiddles Park, Gabalfa)
MD10: Dumania
MD11: -
MD12: Cuation (Tiddles Park, Gabalfa)
MD13: The Gold TyGrr
MD14: Tynelia
MD15: Seckland (Campus Ground, Grappenhall)
MD16: Yafor 2 (Tiddles Park, Gabalfa)
MD17: -
MD18: Dorian & Sonya
MD19: Jerusalem
MD20: Dumania (Al-Fath Stadium, Sukatra)

Dear Diary,

I now understand why Errinundera lost to Squornshelous last week. It seems we thought they were playing with 3 forwards when they were really only playing with 2. Obviously, our defensive strategy was compromised by this error. Surely it would have been spotted after only a few minutes of play? All I can say is we did remarkably well against the world number 1 team.

This week we went to Paleoslavia. I think it's about to collapse from apathy. There appeared to be no coaching staff for their team and only a handful of spectators turned up to watch the game. I’m not kidding. At one stage a wild kick sent the ball up into the terraces. There weren’t any fans to steal it, let alone throw it back. Our vice-captain, venu, had to climb the security fence and dash 20 rows back to collect it. Paleoslavia’s motto is “Quitting” and one can only assume they truly mean it. I think this nation will be going the way of the dinosaurs before much longer. I’d give them about six days.

Maybe it’s a good thing they won’t be around for much longer. The University of the Global Environment gives them a Utopia Rating of 32. Their comment is, “Avoid visiting.” By the way, Errinundera’s has slipped from 87 to 83. That’s not good enough.

Anyway, we defeated Paleoslavia 0-3. venu kicked 2 goals (9, 87) and rosaniel the other (19). Given how bad things were for the dinosaurs I guess it has to be said that they did exceptionally well. Perhaps the potoroos should have done better.

The vice-captain of the team, venu, has had a poor campaign, what with injuries and bad form. Her 2 goals will, I hope, be signs that she has recovered her World Cup 31 form. That’s her below addressing Corporate Torchers Incorporated in Goongerah .

http://i55.photobucket.com/albums/g136/regnans/East%20Gippsland/venu.jpg

Although she was born in and plays for Goongerah, she lectures in Sedition and Foment at the amamotoyodo University in Goolengook. Her feet are every bit as much troublemakers as she is. In the past there have been constant ankle injuries and ingrown toenails. This year she had a stress fracture in one the bones in the centre of her left foot as well as severe bruising of her right heel. Better than a broken neck, I suppose.

Next week we are hosts to Voskadouria at the B Triple R. They are so new they are unranked. The result could be nasty. For their sake, I hope not.

Yours faithfully,

mckennap
ankle strapper, foot massager and boot studder to the potoroo football team

http://spaam.mrdrake.net/flags/ariddia.png Ariddia 4-0 Assegai Developments http://spaam.mrdrake.net/flags/assegai_developments.png

Home victory

Watch ( http://img90.imageshack.us/img90/1856/pinawc32ao7.jpg) constant World Cup 32 news updates on PINA ( http://ns.goobergunch.net/wiki/index.php/Public_International_News_Ariddia)!

“We respect our opponents. We’re not taking anything for granted.”

Those were the words of Ariddian coach Evgheny Melenciuc as Ariddia hosted the left-leaning Armed Republic of Assegai Developments in Haven-Port-Nouveau-Stadium. The guest team was ranked 102nd in the world, suggesting an easy victory for the Rouge-et-Noirs, but Melenciuc promised to treat the match “very seriously”, and not to underestimate his opponents.

Nonetheless, the Ariddians were keen to intimidate the other side as they performed the traditional ulek, then began attacking quickly. Assegai Developments stood firm, defending well until Najmah Majrashi scored the opening goal, shooting the ball past van de Beauchamp in the 20th minute.

The guest team was able to contain the Ariddians’ attacks to some degree, and retaliated with skill, but the Rouge-et-Noirs’ defence was solid, and goalie Xavier Xu seemed unbeatable. A goal by Uha Teh in the thirty-fourth minute made it 2-0 by half-time.

Another goal by Majrashi in the second half was followed by Trevor Komu, brought in late to keep Ariddia’s attack fresh. The two teams swapped shirts in a friendly atmosphere at the end of the match.

“I’m happy with what we’ve been doing so far,” a visibly pleased team captain Hanifah Kyaw said after the match. Ariddia has won all its matches but one (a draw against Wentland). “Now we need to stay focused, and not get too excited. We’ve got a lot of work ahead of us still.”

Still, there was a festive mood in the PDSRA as supporters enjoyed their team’s performance. . . and hoped it would last.

Az-cz Scroll
Az-cz
Il-Lur

Gnomes trip to Milchama and their scheduled friendly fall through

The Gnomes were scheduled to play a friendly match against the Milchama Warriors, hosts of the upcoming world cup. However the Milchamians decide to cancel the match. The reason that the Az-cz football federation was given was that the Milchamians were upset at the mistreatment of their athletes on the Kleptochase tour. When Noz-Tf heard the reasoning he was outraged. He released this statement:

"This is a very strange reaction from the Milchamians. First off football and kleptochase are separate sports entirely. We have no control over what happens over there. Moreover, any claims of bias are offensive. We Az-czzers pride ourselves on our fairness. Yes we're a bunch of theives, but we only steal for the common good. We never purposefully cheat at sport like that. We are disgusted by such a claim. And some of the things that they claim are done against them are simply controlled by the numbers. The pairings are generated exclusively on rank. There is no control over them and once the numbers are ran through the system the matchups are developed automatically. If Milchamians were running the system the same matchups would occur. So we feel that the Milchamians have made an unfortunate claim, and we expect an apology for this action. We also hope the Milchamians take it upon themselves to schedule another friendly between our nations. Despite this incident we still respect them and want to maintain friendly relations."

With no match to travel to the Gnomes enjoyed some time off. Perhaps the Gnomes will benefit from this rest time as they had been struggling a little bit and looked like they were getting tired. Next up on the schedule Okielahoma visits the Gnomes in The Temple of Yak. A win there would guarantee that the Gnomes would be in a top two spot at the halfway break.

<symbol of the “Tynelian Nightly Sporting News with Jeff Jefferson” looms in the background>

Jeff Jefferson: I can’t believe the show’s producers really fired Matt like that.

Tom Tompson: Well they didn’t have much choice after he added the show to his lawsuit. I mean why pay a guy to sue you?

Dinah Miller: I feel bad about that. I think the roundhouse was probably a bit of an over kill. I didn’t want him to get fired.

Tom: The jerk had it coming. That’s right Matt, I know you’re watching I just called you a jerk.

Jeff: Well we’re getting short on time here so why don’t you take us through the big match with Jerusalem Dinah.

Dinah: OK Jeff. Tynelia got a much needed point today on the road against top seed Jerusalem. Things didn’t look too good when the home team jumped out to a 1-0 lead halfway through the first half on a goal by recently minted team captain Kate Bush. Things settled down for a while as Jeruselem probed for weak spots in the Tynelian defense which was waiting for a chance to counter attack. Finally something gave in minute 79 when the old veteran Jay Masterson finally managed to break through the Jeruselem defense for the equalizer after entering the game only a few minutes earlier. Neither side could budge afterwards and things ended with a hard earned point for us.

Tom: You know for short periods of time like he’s been getting Masterson almost looks like he’s ten years younger.

Jeff: I bet knowing the bye was coming up Coach Billington decided to give Masterson a few more minutes than usual.

Dinah: That might have been a part of it Jeff but after the Cuation loss where some people said he waited too long to add Masterson as an additional striker, this was a match Tynelia could not afford to lose so that meant taking some risks.

Jeff: Good thing they got a point because Cuation won too.

Tom: So did Yafor 2.

Dinah: Yeah, this group has been pretty predictable so far, I can’t think of a single big upset so far in seven matchdays. That doesn’t happen too often in the World Cup. In fact I think this draw is the biggest surprise of any of the matches with the top seeds.

Jeff: Is that a problem?

Dinah: Well this is shaping up like WC30 where everything went right by the seeds for the top seeds. Of course we had Bettia in that group too. So if it shapes up like this then Cuation will hold on and get the third spot over us. We need to win the rematch there. At least we matched their draw with Jeruselem so we didn’t lose any ground there.

Tom: And we ended the scoring drought too.

Dinah: I told you guys not to get too worried about the myth of the mid qualifying scoring drought. We have Seckland after the break and a rematch with the Gold Tygrr. We should be able to build some momentum for the Yafor 2 rematch.

Jeff: A getting a draw with a top team like Jeruselem should really get the team confident going into the rest of these road trips with the top teams in the second half.

Tom: And if we can do that we can advance.

Jeff: Well it would be nice if Cuation and Yafor 2 slipped up a bit, looks like its still a five team race though Bettia is building a gap on the pack.

Dinah: Jeruselem could be a bit concerned that they aren’t as solidly into second as they might be given their draws with us and Cuation but they are still going to be one of the three teams moving on from here.

Tom: And we take the third one.

Dinah: Hope so Tom, but its too early to say unfortunately.

Jeff: Well the team will have the break to think about it. But for now that’s all the time we’ve got for today. Next show we’ll have baseball player Gary Blonds with us to answer questions about glue sniffing before games allegations recently surfacing and a quick peak at how well the rest of Tynelia’s group did in the Cup.

(OOC: I believe the tables are correct as done. If you notice any errors let me know. Also I apologize to any countries whose names I shrunk. For my purposes it needed to be done)

Amda-Mo: Well with no Az-cz game to analyze let's get you caught up on the various groups. Let's start with our own:

(Group table appears on screen)


LE 7 0 0 21 30 2 28
Az-cz 5 1 0 16 20 2 18
Qutar 3 1 2 10 12 11 1
Sel Appa 2 3 2 9 11 16 -5
Cataduanes 2 2 2 8 11 11 0
Okielahoma 2 1 3 7 6 8 -2
Algal States 2 0 4 6 5 18 -13
Tocapa 1 0 5 3 6 15 -9
Anrow 0 0 6 0 4 22 -18


Our group has stabilized significantly. We still have a significant lead on second place and Liverpool England is one home win against us away from a perfect first half as they've been absolutely cruising. Qutar is back in third and the expected teams, Sel Appa, Cataduanes, and Okielahoma are close behind. Not much in the way of suprises here, other than possibly us.

Lur-Mn: Indeed not really much to add here. I expect Qutar to add to their lead going into the halfway.

Amda-Mo: Now onto group 2


Krytenia 6 0 0 18 20 6 14
CH 5 1 0 16 25 9 16
ESF 3 3 1 12 14 10 4
AIF 3 1 2 10 10 9 1
R-T 2 2 3 8 17 15 2
Turori 2 2 2 8 11 10 1
Bostopia 1 1 4 4 6 15 -9
The HURD 1 0 5 3 5 18 -13
Nomadasia 0 0 6 0 3 19 -16


Another group that isn't that suprising. Krytenia and Commerce Heights have pulled away, and the next four all fairly good teams are bunched up. ESF is technically in third, although Alasdair I Frosticus has a game in hand, so in some sense have the advantage. Still any of those four teams could lay claim to the third spot.

Lur-Mn: I still think Elves Security Forces is the team to beat from that group. I think Ropa-Topia is a pretender and will soon fall back, but really I'd believe any of the other three.

Amda-Mo: Now onto group 3.


NMS 5 0 1 15 22 6 16
Quakmybush 5 0 1 15 22 6 16
Vilita 5 0 1 15 13 8 5
Anastasiania 4 0 3 12 14 9 5
D2R 4 0 2 12 12 11 1
Kericia 2 0 5 6 8 13 -5
BBQ 2 0 4 6 4 12 -8
A. Ptolemais 1 0 5 3 3 21 -18
Race Track 0 0 6 0 7 19 -12


This is a very interesting group, with a bunch of teams bunched together. With New Montreal States win over Vilita today there are now no undefeated teams. The top three are all on 15 points and Dance 2 Revolution and Anastasiania are waiting just three points back.

Lur-Mn: Indeed a very exciting group. Anastasiania has played a game more than everyone else and is unlikely to keep up with the other top teams, but the other four are all big name countries. This will be a fun group to watch. If I had to pick now I'd call for D2R to be the one to fall short, but as you saw when they beat Quakmybush they've rediscovered their ability that deserted them in allowing us to advance last cup.

Amda-Mo: Now onto group 4.


Oliverry 6 0 0 18 20 5 15
TLC 6 0 1 18 15 1 14
Cafeundeu 4 1 1 13 12 8 4
Spaam 3 1 2 10 13 8 5
Miceland 2 2 2 8 7 7 0
ASMV 2 2 2 8 8 9 -1
Backwardistan 1 0 5 3 7 15 -8
Deathbat 1 0 6 3 5 20 -15
Salwinia 0 0 6 0 4 18 -14


The top two aren't suprises, but the third team is. Cafeundue has definitely channeled the disappointment of losing to an inferior Dumania side in the Baptism of Fire. They're look quite strong and their win over Spaam is definitely one of the biggest upsets of this tournament. Do you think they can hold that spot?

Lur-Mn: I think they've got a real shot at it. They ought to be able to maintain that third spot to halfway point as Spaam has a tougher schedule these last to games. Any team holding a spot at the halfway point has a real chance. But certainly Spaam can claw back. And don't forget about Miceland or ASMV. Neither of them are dead either.

Amda-Mo: Now to group 5.


Nedalia 6 0 1 18 23 3 20
Bedistan 6 0 0 18 25 8 17
Bazalonia 4 0 2 12 13 9 4
Sativaville 4 0 2 12 13 9 4
Snub Nose 39 3 0 4 9 8 18 -10
Green Wombat 2 0 4 6 12 17 -5
Nebuleux 1 1 4 4 7 12 -5
New Hypocria 1 1 4 4 3 11 -8
Monty Python 0 0 6 0 4 21 -17


Well the top three are no suprise. The order of the top three might be, but in reality Bedistan is on top of the group. Satiaville being dead tied with Bazalonia might come as a suprise.

Lur-Mn: I'm a little bit disappointed in the Bazalonians. I'd expected them to be much safer than they are at this point. I expect them to improve and qualify with some breathing room, but they can't be pleased with where they are right now.

Amda-Mo: And group 6:


Spruitland 5 2 0 17 19 5 14
Casari 5 1 0 16 22 5 17
Fmjphoenix 4 1 1 13 16 10 6
Marceau State 3 1 2 10 17 15 2
Aurendia 3 1 3 10 11 12 -1
Noremark 2 1 3 7 11 16 -5
Spindomia 1 1 4 4 7 15 -8
N Propagandia 1 0 5 3 4 16 -12
Choobie 0 0 6 0 5 18 -13

Another group where Casari is really the group leader, with a game in hand to overcome their one point defecit. The top three are not suprising, but Aurendia has to be disappointed that they're struggling to defend their qualifying spot. Marceau State has looked good and might be a challenger down the stretch.

Lur-Mn: Unlikely Amda-Mo. Expect the top three to pull away. Marceau State isn't a real challenger, and Aurendia doesn't seem to be either.

Amda-Mo: Onto group 7.


Schiavonia 5 1 0 16 17 3 14
Ariddia 5 1 0 16 17 4 13
Wentland 4 2 0 14 18 6 12
L Mateys 4 1 2 13 14 12 2
Assegai 3 1 2 10 12 11 1
Qazox 2 0 4 6 15 15 0
Stromboland 1 0 5 3 6 17 -11
TMK 1 0 6 3 5 20 -15
F Oranges 0 0 6 0 2 18 -16


Schiavonia and Ariddia on top is right as it should be. Wentland in third isn't a big suprise and neither is Lisburn Mateys in fourth after having played an extra game. But Assegai in fifth is a big suprise and Qazox's struggles after qualifying last time are hugely suprising. As it stands they're 7 points behind fourth and 8 behind third. They're even four points behind Assegai Developments. They look to have very little chance of qualification this time.

Lur-Mn: Yes one long suffering team benefits from passing a team that just ended their suffering. Lisburn Mateys could challenge Wentland, but Wentland does looke well poised to finally make it back to the cup proper.

Amda-Mo: Next up is group 8.


Rejistania 6 0 1 18 24 6 18
Squornshelous 6 0 0 18 19 7 12
Errinundera 5 0 1 15 18 9 9
Demot 4 0 2 12 18 10 8
JSY 2 1 3 7 11 13 -2
Rorysville 2 1 3 7 7 9 -2
Haraki 1 2 4 5 3 10 -7
Paleoslavia 0 0 6 0 3 20 -17
Voskadouria 0 0 6 0 0 19 -19


Not suprisingly Squornshelous and Rejistania lead the way. And not suprisingly Errinundera and Demot are just behind them. Those are the only teams of importance in this group. Squornshelous and Rejistania look unlikely to be passed. Errinundera certainly has inside position but Demot could pass them.

Lur-Mn: Unfortunately this doesn't look like a good group for AO. Demot is still alive, but don't expect them to pass Errinundera. They've just got too much heart to cough up the lead. In another group Demot would probably be in good shape, but they ended up in a very tough group.

Amda-Mo: And onto group 9:


Archregimancy 6 1 0 19 19 4 15
Starblaydia 5 1 0 16 19 3 16
Fort Europe 4 1 1 13 9 8 1
N. Caesarea 3 1 3 10 13 9 4
Rordia 2 2 2 8 11 6 5
S. Plijous 2 1 3 7 10 16 -6
Harlesburg 1 1 4 4 7 14 -7
Penguins 1 0 5 3 6 11 -5
Schnabo 0 0 6 0 3 26 -23


This is the other group with a huge suprise team sitting in third position. And Fort Europe is in much better shape than Cafeundeu. Northern Caesarea, a qualifier and group opponet of Az-cz last cup, is in fourth but has played a game more than Fort Europe and is three points behind.

Lur-Mn: They suffered some serious bad luck, as many in Az-cz felt they were the best team in the whole tournament. There was a reason many felt they'd outperform their rank. Plus Northern Caesarea is one of the most inexplicable cup qualifiers. Despite making it three times on the trot, no one really knows exactly how they did, and they've never made any noise in the cup itself, and really no one's sure they're that good of a side. And in the fact that the other teams chasing them aren't that good and I'd say Fort Europe ought to qualify.

Amda-Mo: Wow. Well that leaves just the last group:


Bettia 6 0 0 18 20 7 13
Jeruselem 5 2 0 17 19 4 15
Cuation 4 1 1 13 12 7 5
Tynelia 3 2 2 11 12 7 5
Yafor 2 3 1 2 10 12 9 3
D&S 2 0 4 6 6 10 -4
Dumania 1 1 4 4 5 12 -7
Seckland 0 1 5 1 4 20 -16
Gold TyGrr 0 0 6 0 4 18 -14


Well the three previous qualifiers are the three top teams. Bettia is looking quite strong. Jeruselem has had a couple of small hiccups but is rolling along well none the less. And Cuation has a bit of a lead for third. Tynelia is still alive in fourth, but having played an extra game they are a bit further behind, and Yafor 2 is very much alive in fifth. Dorian & Sonia is struggling along in sixth and not really looking to have much impact on this group.

Lur-Mn: I'm disappointed by the play of Tynelia. I'd really thought they'd come through this cup and they're not playing that well. The draw with Jeruselem is nice but they might well be more than a game out of third place at the half way point. They need to kick it up in the second half to avoid another disappointing finish. Yafor 2 has looked better than I expected, although not better than their seed. They're still dangerous. I think this is one of the most interesting groups.

Amda-Mo: Any other things of note?

Lur-Mn: Just a note on how well Liverpool England is playing right now. They're far and away the top team right now. In terms of goal differential the next best team is 8 behind them, but that is Nedalia who has lost a match, amongst other teams that are still perfect the next team is Bedistan who is a whopping 11 goal differential behind Liverpool England. They've truly been swatting opponents away, averaging nearly a five goal victory. And we face them in two match days. It should be quite exciting.

Amda-Mo: Indeed it will. Most groups are shaping up as expected but there's still a lot of interesting football to be played. We'll see you back here after the Okielahoma match. Good night everybody.

http://img142.imageshack.us/img142/9163/starlogo2ti.jpg
Kirk's job safe.............for now

After being beaten by Ariddia quiet easily, Mateys need to be sure that they where in the correct frame of mind in order to tackle The Mushroom Kingship.

Mateys fielded their strongest side clearly showing that they believed 'the shrooms' had the ability to cause the Mateys problems, luckily though this wasnt the case the MAteys players made the ground their own.

Complete domination form start to finish with a total of 22 shots from the away side, Mateys will no that they should have won more convincingly.

Goals from Dougherty, and Naylor in the first allowed Kirk to make a few cahnges at half time, with Cairns and Mc Cann comming on for Dougherty and O'Flannery, which was meat with boos from the Glenavy provinces, section of the travelling crowd as both players are From Crewe FC, who are based in Glenavy Province.
Mc Cann turned on the style, knowing that he has a point to prove to regain a starting place after a disappointing start to the campaign. Mc Cann went on one of his trademark runs, firstly playing a one, two with left back Mitchell, this then allowed him to wrong foot a midfielder in his way and surge onward. Aaron then used his raw pace to burn the finally defender before planting the ball into the net.
Catching up with Aaron after the game he had this to say (in a heavy eastern Matey accent),"o aye there has been pressure on me to perform, i ballsed up the first two games of this years world cup, but after to be dropped i only wanted to succeed more and i will continue to work hard, like".

Kirks position has also recently been less critisized with three wins and one defeat to Ariddia the teams performances have drastically improved since the beginning.

http://spaam.mrdrake.net/flags/the_mushroom_kingship.pngThe Mushroom Kingship 0 - 3 Lisburn Mateyshttp://spaam.mrdrake.net/flags/lisburn_mateys.png

Cuation March On

A media blackout over the team after the Cuation FA decided there had been too much criticism of the players despite the "good results", in the season. As one FA source said "We win all but against Bettia but we get not good enough, poor attack and criticism of the defence. This is affecting the players and that is why you got pushed off the air."

Now Cuation press are allowed to report on the games so far but due to space, we can only due filler. We expect most fans saw the matches by illegal means anyway, if not, bad luck.

Cuation [2-2] Jeruselem

Cuation's first draw of the tournament, an impressive performance by the home team, the fans lifting the team. Jeruselem were without the pregnant Dazza and that may have cost them the win, she is a player capable of driving a team that little extra. The stand in Captain Kate Bush did well but could not grab the winner.

Cuation's 5-4-1 formation set out Cuation's game plan to stifle a superior team, the hard tackles unsettling the away side a little. Cuation created little and had to rely on set play's to get their two goals. Lewish did create one chance by himself, blazing over after a strong run, but that was it.

Jeruselem dominated the first half but went in 1-0 down as, with half time approaching rapidly, Jude smothered Natasha Greski snap shot, releasing the ball quickly with a big boot. Lu Fei knocked it down for Fallen, the ball played to Lewish, the winger's cross forcing Pastor Jones to head behind. Downing amazed everybody by shooting straight from the corner, the ball just eluding the grasp of Snaz Simpson.

Jeruselem came out in the second half and served early warning when Bush's long range volley rattled the post with Jude beaten. Cuation defended well but they were finally breached when young Natasha Greski made a clever run, breaking the offside trap to flick home Alan Belmore's cross.

Jude had no chance to save that 63rd minute effort and must have been wondering if he should have got out of bed that day in the 70th minute. Michael Clarke's good pass gave Bush some room to shoot, her low effort brilliantly saved one handed by Jude but the rebound was not kind, Rocky Pointy Stick pouncing.

Downing was replaced by Speedy but Rual and Keane stayed on the bench as SH dared not risk going for broke. Jeruselem nearly made it 3-1 when Rashina Dallas advanced with the ball before trying a 30 yarder that curled towards the top corner. Jude threw himself at the ball, somehow getting his finger tips too tip the ball over.

Cuation pushed more men forward on the break at this point and managed to grab a 75th minute equaliser. Speedy lured the full back Dallas into a foul but without Downing's wicked delivery; it shouldn't have been too dangerous. Fallen took it, curling it towards the far post, Captain Irwin headed the ball across goal, the extended leg of Lu Fei poking Cuation back on level terms.

Cuation sat back at this point, Jeruselem pushing for the three points they deserved. They had chances but Cuation's man of the match, Jude, made several stunning stops. At the death, Bush could have won it as she forced Butcher into an error but Jude narrowed the angle and blocked with his legs.

Mikaela Eyre wiped a strand of her bright red hair from her face revealing gorgeous green eyes. She signaled the cameraman and waited for her cue...

“This is Mikaela Eyre reporting live from Wentland, locale of Assegai’s next match in NS World Cup XXXII qualifying. Tonight, the Riskbreakers of Assegai Developments take on Wentland, ranked No. 42 in NS. After facing the solid Ariddian team, Assegai should be prepared for tonight’s match. But, in the topsy-turvy world of NS football, anything can happen at any given time.”

She turns and faces Alys Spicer, a pretty, 20-year-old with shock blonde hair and big, bright, blue eyes.

“Alys, although the offense managed several attacks against Ariddia, it seems that you really missed the aggressiveness that Severus Snape brings to the pitch,” Mikaela says.

“Definitely, Mikaela, he might grumble a lot, but he’s very important to our offense,” chirps Alys. “It’ll be good to have him back out on the field, although I think that Stephen de Cobham did a great job!”

“Despite your young age, you’ve also become an integral part of this team, Alys. How do you maintain your cool when you have the world’s best breathing down your neck?” Mikaela asks.

Alys giggles. “It’s quite simple, really,” she says, smiling. “Although I show a lot of respect for my teammates and opponents off the field, when it’s game time, we’re all on the same level. I just go out there and let my heart flow and I don’t pay attention to attitudes or egos or any of that.”

“What do you think are Assegai’s chances tonight against Wentland?” asks Mikaela, wiping a strand of hair from her face.

“To be honest, very good,” says Alys, suddenly serious. “Playing a team as strong as Ariddia has prepared us for Wentland, who are not at that high level. Now, don’t get me wrong; Wentland isn’t ranked No. 42 because they spend their time roasting mushrooms or picking oranges. They’re a very respectable team, but we never think we’re going to lose. Whether it’s against the best team in the world or an unranked squad, we feel we’re going to win. The difference is the difficulty, and Wentland should not be as difficult as Ariddia.”

“So you’re predicting a win?” asks Mikaela.

“That would be unfair to Wentland,” says Alys. “I’m not predicting a win, but I think we can beat. Actually, I know we can beat them. By the way, we’ll be wearing our alternate kits tonight; just wanted to let our fans know.”

“Well, we wish you the best,” says Mikaela patting Alys on the shoulder. “A win tonight would be huge.”

Alys nods.

“Well, Assegai, thanks for tuning in today,” says Mikaela with a big smile. “Tune in tonight, after the game, for player reactions. Have a great day!”

Tonight

http://spaam.mrdrake.net/flags/wentland.png Wentland
vs.
http://spaam.mrdrake.net/flags/assegai_developments.png Assegai Developments

TOP DRAW

NSWC Match 5

Rordia - 1 - V - 1 - Fort Europe

Report by Amy Bystander, Commonwealth News.

Rordia may have been ranked much higher than Fort Europe at the start of the tournement, but they are still lower in group nine and have a long way to go to catch up, so a draw on their home ground was clearly not what they were looking for. A draw was however exactly what they recieved as Fort Europe once again showed that they are a team not to be underestimated with Michelle Bishop slotting the ball into the back of the net midway through the first half to collect her fith goal of the tournement so far. Fort Europe take a break next week with a bye match in the tournement allowing the players to gain some well deserved rest ahead of their next match at home against unranked minows Schnabo who have yet to win single point in this competition. On their day off while everyone else in the group is playing, Fort Europe have organised a charity match against a team of former Fort Europe players at the Commonwealth Stadium with all procedes going towards Cancer Research. The Commonwealth Sports Council has also announced that all proffit from gate reciepts taken during this competition will also go to charity.

PLAYER RANKINGS
(Out of 10)

6 - James West
6 - Floe Peltsten
7 - Tim Forrester (C)
7 - Murphy Lee
6 - Gemma Lloyd []
7 - Katherine Keller
7 - Ryan Holmes
6 - Vicky Princess
7 - Mia Nevola
9 - Michelle Bishop (32)
7 - Karl Isaak

SUBS

- - Ed Russell
- - Laura Harris
7 - Aki Haddon (On for Lee (50))
7 - Edowine Sanjuan (On for Lloyd (65))
- - Del Jenkins


-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

THREE FOR THE PRICE OF TWO

NSWC Match 6

Fort Europe - 3 - V - 2 - Schnabo

Fort Europe have done it again with another decent victory over international opposition in the NationStates World Cup as they push their way towards qualification from group nine, and head towards their target of reaching the quater finals. Fort Europe opened the scoring early in the first half through top scorer Michelle Bishop before Shawn Pearson found his own net to bring the game level. Pearson then gave away a penalty to earn himself an early shower, which West was unable to stop. Fort Europe charged back in the second half though with two stunning goals from Karl Isaak to put the home side back on top and ensure a well deserved, if less than tidy victory.

"The masters of entertainment shot themselves in the foot here, not once but twice and still came back to win in front of their own fans while never loosing their composure of their confidence with a clean passing game." Said Fort Europe's biggest supporter, David "Fortress" Quellarin who has travelled to every match Fort Europe have played so far in this competition. Fans who turned up last week for the charity match held at the Commonwealth Stadium will be interested to know that fifteen million, three hundred and twenty seven thousand Commonwealth Euro's was official sum given to the Commonwealth Cancer Research charities and a big thanks to everyone who turned up and gave donations to the cause.

The team meet group leaders The Archregimancy next at home with a chance at another upset, but The Archregimancy are currently unbeaten in the competition so far leaving Fort Europe with an uphill struggle if they wish to get anything from the game. Team manager Stuart Moss said there was every chance that if the players turn up with the right attitude and the croud get behind the team, there is no reason that they shouldn't have an advantage over their guests. The Archregimancy should expect a warm welcome off the pitch like any other team arriving in Fort Europe, however they will be greated at the ground by one hundred and twenty thousand Fort Europe supporters making a massive cochophony of sound in a stadium designed to maximise the accustic volume by reflecting it down onto the pitch. Fans travelling to the game are reminded that everyone will be searched before entering the stadium, and the park and ride system will be enforced to prevent congestion on the roads.

PLAYER RANKINGS
(Out of 10)

6 - James West
7 - Floe Peltsten []
7 - Tim Forrester (C)
3 - Shaun Pearson (OG 27) []
7 - Gemma Lloyd
8 - Katherine Keller []
8 - Ryan Holmes
9 - Vicky Princess
8 - Mia Nevola
9 - Michelle Bishop (24)
10 - Karl Isaak (57,79)

SUBS

- - Ed Russell
8 - Laura Harris (On for Peltsten (70))[]
8 - Aki Haddon (On for Lloyd (30))
7 - Edowine Sanjuan (On for Holmes (60))
- - Del Jenkins

CAFUNDÉU WINS AGAIN AND STAYS IN A VERY GOOD POSITION

http://img.terra.com.br/i/2006/10/26/412855-8610-ga.jpg
Heitor dribbling an opponent player

In another very good match of Cafundéu, the monopolists defeated another team, this time in the city of the prisons, Carandirú City. Salwinia even tried to make Cafundéu’s game difficult, but the players trained by Braddock could show their superiority scoring three goals. Ganz Ijak was the man of the match scoring two of the goals and making many beautiful plays to help the team to win.

After this result, Cafundéu stays in the third position in the group, in front of Spaam. Cafundéu’s next game will be against The Lowland Clans, a very strong team that is in front of Cafundéu in the tables. Surely it’ll be a very difficult game, even playing at home, and if Cafundéu can get a good result, then the qualification will be wanted by the national media, by the supporters and even by the players, as it would put the team in a very comfortable position after seven games.

THE GAME
Salwinia started the game in the defense, trying to hold Cafundéu’s pressure and avoiding suffering a goal. Cafundéu starting the game attacking and trying to score in the first minutes. And it happened. Salwinia couldn’t hold Cafundéu’s attacks and soon suffered the goal. In the third minute, Kliek crossed the ball to the area and Becão headed to score the first goal of the game. He took a piece of paper that was in his short and showed it to the camera: “This goal is for my mother!”

After suffering the goal, Salwinia had to leave the defense and start to attack more, as they were losing the game. But Cafundéu still had more goal chances, although Salwinia had some too. 7th minute: Mercegues took the ball in the midfield and passed to Brahma. The midfielder didn’t get space to shoot, so he passed to Heitor who shot, but sent the ball wide. 10th minute: Salwinia had a chance with an attacker, who got the ball after a good play of a midfielder. He shot, but sent the ball over the bar.

13th minute: Ray Kirs started running since the defense and reached the midfield. He passed to Anormal and received the ball back few seconds later. Then, he crossed the ball to the area and Becão headed it again, but this time the goalkeeper got it. 16th minute: Sávio Ferrari fouled a midfielder and received the yellow card. One minute after, an attacker received the ball after the free kick, invaded the area and shot, scoring the goal. Franz Braddock started to shout saying to the players that they needed to work harder.

After suffering the goal, the players of the home team realized that they would only win if they play the game with will to fight and to get the ball, so the team returned to play better. 20th minute: Vandick got the ball in the midfield and passed to Kliek. The player dribbled a defender and passed to Ganz Ijak, who was positioned inside the area. The attacker dribbled a defender and shot, but the ball hit the post. 21st minute: Anormal took the ball and was fouled by a defender, who received the yellow card.

24th minute: The visitors had a chance after Vandick lost the ball in the defense. A winger crossed the ball to the area and one of the attackers headed it, but the goalkeeper Vargas was able to get the ball easily. 26th minute: Brahma passed the ball to Anormal, who invaded the area and passed to Ganz Ijak, in front of the goalkeeper. The striker dribbled the opponent goalkeeper and shot to score another goal for Cafundéu, making all the fans in the stadium very excited with the current result.

http://img.terra.com.br/i/2006/10/19/410317-6311-ga.jpg
Cafundéu played another team using a white kit(the fourth time in six games)

The visitors weren’t playing bad, but surely their attacks weren’t strong and their finishes were poor. 29th minute: Salwinia made a good play from the left side of the field with a defender and he passed to a midfielder. He shot from outside the area, the ball hit Sávio Ferrari’s head and went over the bar. Another player took the corner, but Becão headed the ball to safety. 31st minute: Mercegues was fouled by a defender, who received the yellow card. Kliek took the free kick and was near to score, but the goalkeeper made a great save.

35th minute: Ray Kirs collected the ball and passed it to Anormal. The giant midfielder knocked an opponent and passed to Heitor. The attacker invaded the area and passed to Ganz Ijak, who gave the ball back to Heitor. With great chances to score, he shot, but sent the ball wide, missing a very good goal opportunity. 38th minute: Brahma lost the ball in the midfield and the opponents started a counterattack. They reached the attack and crossed the ball to the area, but Mercegues got the ball after a confusion inside the area.

40th minute: Mercegues tackled a midfielder and passed the ball to Brahma. The midfielder ran to the area and dribbled one midfielder, but made a weak shot and the goalkeeper could get the ball without problems. 42nd minute: Salwinia attacked with a winger, who invaded the area and shot, but he sent the ball wide. The last minutes of the first half were interesting, but the teams couldn’t get more good opportunities and it ended 2x1 to Cafundéu. The fans started to buy their hot-dogs, sodas and peanuts.

Both coaches made changes in their teams for the second half. Sávio Ferrari left the game and Ducas entered in his place. Salwinia made two changes. Cafundéu started the second half better, but Salwinia corrected the breaches in the defense, so Cafundéu’s attacks started to be less dangerous. 4th minute: The visitors had a good chance after Ducas missed the ball and an attacker got it. He couldn’t invade the area, so he shot from outside the area and sent the ball over the bar.

8th minute: Mercegues got the ball in the midfield and was fouled. The player who fouled him received the yellow card. Mercegues decided to leave because he could get injured. Hauser entered in his place. 12th minute: Salwinia was attacking when Ducas made a violent foul in an attacker and received the yellow card. The ball was crossed to the area and was headed inside the area, but Vargas saved. 15th minute: Brahma took the ball and passed it to Kliek. The midfielder tried to dribble three players and lost the ball.

19th minute: Anormal knocked a midfielder and got the ball. Then he saw Heitor in a good position and passed to the attacker. He received and shot, but the goalkeeper made the best save of the whole match. Really incredible. 23rd minute: Heitor received the ball again from Anormal and shot again to the goal The ball hit a defender and Ganz Ijak got the rebound. He dribbled a defender and shot, scoring his second goal in the game and the third goal of Cafundéu.

http://img.terra.com.br/i/2006/10/26/412861-4961-ga.jpg
The marking of Salwinia was very tough

25th minute: Hauser got the ball and passed to Ganz Ijak. The attacker dribbled a defender and passed to Anormal who was positioned at the entrance of the area. As soon as he got the ball he shot it to the goal, but the ball went wide after hitting a defender. Kliek took the corner and Kirs headed it, but missed the goal. 29th minute: Salwinia started a counterattack after Vandick lost the ball. Ducas made another violent foul and was sent off. Because of that, Braddock had to put Wantuirso in Brahma’s place.

31st minute: In another counterattack, the visitors reached the attack with a winger. He dribbled Vandick and shot to the goal, but he sent the ball wide. 35th minute: Ray Kirs made a good play in the left side of the field and passed to Anormal. The midfielder passed to Hauser, who held the ball for some moments before passing it to Ganz Ijak. The attacker dribbled a defender and fell on the ground inside the area, but the referee ignored him even with many players asking for a penalty.

37th minute: Kliek passed the ball to Heitor. He was well marked by a defender and because of that he had to pass to Ganz Ijak. The striker got the ball in the air and headed to score a goal, but he was offside and the referee disallowed the goal. Cafundéu was playing well even with one player less than Salwinia and could control the ball possession of the game without problems, sometimes even making something unusual with the ball to make the supporters happy.

40th minute: Salwinia had another chance after Vandick lost the ball, but the attacker was very nervous and shot the ball as soon as he got it. The shot was very weak and Wantuirso could intercept the ball before it entered the area. Vandick was very tired, but Braddock already changed three players, so he had to continue playing even without conditions. So, Braddock asked that Hauser started to defend more, so Vandick could rest a bit and avoid running so much.

43rd minute: Wantuirso took the ball from an attacker and made a long range pass to the attack. Kliek headed the ball and Heitor got it. He tried to dribble a defender, but lost the ball. Anormal took the ball back and shot from outside the area, obligating the keeper to make a wonderful save. Injury time: A Salwinia player fell on the ground inside the area asking for a penalty, but the referee ignored him as he did with Ganz Ijak and ended the game. Cafundéu won another game.

Midifelder Hauser said to the media: “I played most of the second half, so I’m really happy to be able to help my country to get another victory.” Right-back Vandick said: “I’m very tired, but I hope to be fit for the next game against The Lowland Clans. Ducas was sent off, but he is a reserve player so we won’t miss him very much, although we all know that he’s a very good player.” Anormal said: “Ganz Ijak was the star today. We all helped the team, but he surely made the difference, today he is our hero.”

The coach Franz Braddock is more than excited with Cafundéu’s very good position in the table. In a interview to the media, he showed this: “Hahahahaha, I can’t believe that this is happening. We’re playing a world class football, it’s really very good! Now I fully believe that we’ll qualify and we’ll show the world that we’re a dangerous team with players that love the country where they have born. And tomorrow we'll play again against a team using a white kit. It's very common, as the reserve kits of many countries are white.”

http://img.terra.com.br/i/2006/10/26/412873-8417-ga.jpg
Fans commemorated the victory

CAFUNDÉU 3x1 SALWINIA

Place: Presídio, in Carandirú City.
Attendance: 82,386 people(more than the maximum capacity).
Referee: Juan Carlos Barbossa Mería.
Man of the Match: Ganz Ijak(Cafundéu).

http://spaam.mrdrake.net/flags/cafundeu.png CAFUNDÉU: Vargas, Vandick, Kirs, Becão and Sávio Ferrari(Ducas); Anormal, Mercegues(Hauser), Brahma(Wantuirso) and Kliek; Heitor and Ganz Ijak.
Coach: Franz Braddock.

http://spaam.mrdrake.net/flags/salwinia.png SALWINIA: no team released.

Ratings:
9- Ganz Ijak
8- Anormal, Heitor and Becão
7- Vargas, Kirs, Wantuirso, Mercegues, Brahma, Kliek and Hauser
6- Sávio Ferrari
5- Vandick
4- Ducas

GOALS: CAFUNDÉU: Becão 3’ , Ganz Ijak 26’/68’.
SALWINIA: An attacker 17’.

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Cafundéu – next game’s formation: Vargas, Vandick, Kirs, Becão and Wantuirso; Anormal, Priotto, Brahma and Kliek; Heitor and Ganz Ijak.
Style of +2

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Goalscorers after 6 games:
5- Ganz Ijak
2- Heitor and Anormal
1- Kirs, Brahma and Becão

KB (Kate Bush, Jeruselem Captain)
JJ (John Jerk, Jeruselem Coach)

...

KB: Coach! Coach!
JJ: What's the matter Kate? The draw with Tynelia I assume?
KB: Yes, we need Dazza back in the team.
JJ: The midfield isn't working well isn't it.

KB: We don't have enough midfielders coach. We need a veteran back in the team!
JJ: Well losing Dazza Dallas and then not having people like Anna Goldstein around anymore does not help.
KB: We only have four proper midfielders, we need reinforcements!
JJ: But in the past, four is enough?

KB: Well - Dazza Dallas is out. Rocky Pointy Stick is a first-timer and he's not yet upto the full standard but he's getting there. Alan Belmore is doing a lot of work, maybe too much work at the moment. Shane Warne is f**king useless really! He is. And then Michael Clarke is not fully fit at the moment.
JJ: So which defender or striker shall me promote - most of them aren't good midfielders really. The defenders are typical defenders and most of the strikers don't like running around much.
KB: Big Gay Al, he's the man or woman.
JJ: Why him? I hope it's not "Ball Control" joke ...

KB: I'm serious. He's no Dazza but I think he can do the job.
JJ: Big Gay Al? What about we put him through a test to see if he's able. I'm sure he's willing.
KB: Maybe that Rashina girl too.
JJ: No, no - she's a defender. She's not Dazza in many ways, and she's too good in defense to move to midfield. What about that Monique Alexander?

KB: The one who can't keep clothes on in a photo shoot?
JJ: Yeah, that's her. Not Dazza.
KB: I guess she's young and well, she likes going forward a lot.
JJ: Well, let's give Big Gay Al and Monique a try?

KB: Sure thing.
JJ: And getting Dazza back? Not likely unless she sleeps with a lot of people.
KB: Well, she can't get pregnant again for while.
JJ: Other than that, not a chance. I tried but rules are rules. Last cup she was actually pregnant.

KB: Well, let's see what happens

...

Dazza: Hey, Big Gay Al!
Al: Hey Dazza, you look fabulous.
Dazza: Thanks, don't forget ONE ON ONE interview next game.
Al: Sure thing Dazza. Can I ask a favour?

Dazza: What's that. Anything to do with Ricky Pointy Stick?
Al: No, I need a dress.
Dazza: A dress? Why mine?
Al: The hot little pink number.

Dazza: What't the occasion?
Al: I'm working on a video for friend.
Dazza: Sure thing, but we gotta have a copy of the video.
Al: I take care of my clothes, don't worry.

Dazza: A drag thing?
Al: You can say that.
Dazza: My dresses aren't exactly conservative either. You know holes in funny places ...
Al: Perfect for this video.

Dazza: What's the video is for?
Al: Acceptance of gay people, it's a comedy one.
Dazza: Let's see, a guy walks into a bar and chats a hot chick who turns out to be gay in drag?
Al: Yeah, something like that.

Dazza: Gotta send a copy to Ricky then!

... (FYI)

Group 5:
Nedalia [5-0] Snub Nose 39

Group 10:
Dumania [1-2] Yafor 2
Bettia [2-1] Dorian and Sonya
Cuation [2-0] The Gold TyGrr
Jeruselem [1-1] Tynelia

The Daily Quak
Unfriendly Skies Cancel Friendly

The Quakmybush Sharks were supposed to play Turori in a friendly yesterday. However, due to some horrible storms, the Sharks could not make it to Turori, who were their scheduled opponents. So instead they were forced to stay back in Quakmybush and basically, well do nothing. The team will face Vilita tomorrow, in what will be one of the most important matches for the Sharks so far in qualifying.

Here is the group 3 Table after Matchday 8.

Team GP W D L PTS GF GA GD
Quakmybush 6 5 0 1 15 22 6 16
New Montreal States 6 5 0 1 15 22 6 16
Vilita 6 5 0 1 15 13 8 5
Anastasiania 7 4 0 3 12 14 9 5
Dance 2 Revolution 6 4 0 2 12 12 11 1
Kericia 7 2 0 5 6 8 13 -5
Bushes Been Quaked 6 2 0 4 6 4 12 -8
Alexandrian Ptolemais 6 1 0 5 3 3 21 -18
Race Track 6 0 0 6 0 7 19 -12

As you can see, this match will be for first place, the Sharks do have a higher rating then Vilita, but Vilita are far more experienced side. The Sharks will need to play a great game to conitnue vying for first in the qualifying group. After the game versus Vilita, the Sharks will be able to loosen up abit with Anastasiania, and then Race Track, then it gets tough again, with New Montreal States, on the road.

Article By: Rick Juras

Turtles shot out of the sky after remarkable run

In the match against Liverpool England, a known powerhouse, the Turtles were shutout in a 4-0 match, and at home no less. I'm here with Coach Charles DuPont.

Phil: "What do you think caused the loss?"

DuPont: "Well, we got sort of cocky, especially after pulling a draw against Qutar. Also, Liverpool England is one of the best teams."

Phil: "So is Az-cz, but you still scored a goal against them."

DuPont: "Well, that was a sort of lucky break. We didn't get it this time."

Phil: "Now that you've been relegated down to fourth place, what do you see for the next set?"

DuPont: "I think basically the same thing, possibly with another draw or win, maybe a lose. I think we were sort of lucky to draw against Qutar and other good teams. Also, there is only a one-point difference for Qutar, us, Cataduanes, Okielahoma, and Algal States. This makes any between any of us ripple strongly."

Phil: "You play Algal States next. What do you think will go on in that?"

DuPont: "Well, we beat them twice already. We've scored 5 goals against them and only conceded 1. I think a win is in order, however they have show a few surprises so far."

Phil: "Well thanks. I'm sure the fans really appreciate you accepting this interview after the match. Good luck!"

DuPont: Thank you very much. We'll do fine."


Phil: "Well that was Coach Charles DuPont of the National Football Team. The Turtles are currently in fourth place, but their grip is shaky. Considering above and below them are one-point differences. A win would be very helpful against Algal States. Here is the current group standings:


Group 1: GP W D L PT GF GA TGD
Liverpool England 7 7 0 0 21 30 2 +28
Az-Cz 6 5 1 0 16 20 2 +18
The Islands of Qutar 6 3 1 2 10 12 11 +1
Sel Appa 7 2 3 2 9 11 16 -5
Cataduanes 6 2 2 2 8 11 11 +0
Okielahoma 6 2 1 3 7 6 8 -2
Algal States 6 2 0 4 6 5 18 -13
Tocapa 6 1 0 5 3 6 15 -9
Anrow 6 0 0 6 0 4 22 -18


Qutar plays Anrow next and will likely win, only expanding their lead. This reinforces that the Turtles must win to keep up for a chance to make it back to third. Compared to previous qualifiers, the Turtles are doing nicely with a 2-3-2 record, not including the drawn friendly against Bazalonia. The goal difference is not bad and was caused mainly by Az-cz and Liverpool England, both of whom defeated Sel Appa. We're likely to see the Turtles make a comeback from this with the match against Algal States and in the second round of qualifiers."

Dear Diary

Well that was rather unispiring. My mom gets cleated from behind, has to leave the game, and the cleater only gets a foul. This referee was clearly biased. With such a devestating blow against them, my dad and his buddies looked certain to fall vicitin to those wacky Ropa-Topians. It really made me angry when that same person who injured my mom netted a goal five minutes later, to put the Ropas up 1-0 just ten minutes into the game. Then the bastard played a beautiful cross into one of his mates, who headed home in the 20th minute to put the ugly mortals up by a two goal margin.

Oh but we still had my dad, likely the best player the Marauders have besides my mom. And boy, did he rise to the occasion!. He took a restart from the boot of Rick, and headed that sucker in with a devestating force. And then when he did his celebration, their keeper punched him. Well, the ref would have none of that, and gave a red card to that idiot. In the second half, he lead an amazing charge, which invovled the team holding the ball for an increadable 75%. The team pushed the attack hard into the attack half, and then in the 70th minute, the crafty Rikard took a pass from my dad, and sent in a sharp shot that left the keeper no chance.

Well, the game ended two all, so I guess it wasn't a complete loss, but my mom is questionable for the next game. In other news though, the team has scheduled the odd nation of Sel Appa to come to the ESF on MD10. This and the Demot friendly should keep those slouches in shape between games, as the second half of qualification is now just a game away! Time to go pratice my conditioning.

Kiso Night

Where have all the Vilitans gone?

Little Abafomi Alikoi sat on the plane arriving at the airport where he would be awaiting his mother to pick him up. He was returning from a visit to his uncle Mikai in Bedistan. But oddly, as passengers got off the plane, no one awote (active form of those who would be awaiting). There were no attendants, and no baggage people. No rental vehicle assistants. No other passengers waiting to board.

Abafomi picked up his wireless communication device and attempted to contact his mother. No response. He looked around, and it appeared that a similar result was being achieved throughout the concourse. Amongst a group of concerned passengers, Abafomi exited the terminal to see if any transportation awote (there it is again!) outside. Again, nothing and no one. After about half an hour of waiting, Abafomi and another passenger, both who lived about 6 miles from the airport, decided instead of waiting, they'd just walk. Abafomi and his new friend Likai both had a decent amount of baggage, so they decided they'd just borrow one of the push karts and throw their luggage in that as they walked home.

It was an eerily quiet walk, despite not knowing what that meant, it was troubling indeed for the two wanderers. No passing transportation. No sound pollution. No jungle cats in the bushes. Nothing. Where had all the Vilitan's gone?

Demot Daily ~ Just Stay Young

The Dynamo continue to stroll through their group with little opposition besides those teams seeded higher than them. This weeks victim was the JSY federation from the nation of Commerce Hieghts, a far cry from the talent of their more established Capitalizt SLANI federation. Though the final scoreline was quite close, this match was over well before the final whistle.

Sarah Ysman showed why everyone loves her, with her busty body and flaming red hair, and then their is her footballing skills. She worked her way around Buchanan and Daniel in the 12th minute, and neatly booted one by Sū Gaŋ-sūn to put the away side up on the board. Oh but the young lass was not done, for in the 20th minute, Masteron sent in an inswinger from a corner that Sarah brought down, shifted past Hwaŋ Hyūn-na, and fired another shot into the back of the netting, this time showing off her upper body strength by doing a handstand. Samantha Black would knock one in right before the half ended, and the two lasses were arm in arm as they skipped off the field.

The second half got horribly bogged down in the midfield, with the JSY side getting a small amount more of the possesion. They were finally able to break through in the 81st minute, when Englert got through on a break away, and fooled Orien. His striker partner, Bolúfero, would be the benificary of an wayward pass by Lucas, and easily got a goal with Orien in a wretched position. Yet the ref ended whatever hopes the JSY had for a draw, as he whistled the game over on the restart. Now the team faces the daunting task of taking on the former world champs, and desperately need the points to keep up with the others in the table.

Article by Jasmine Olyvander

Hello Netizens,

Okay, so we did lose againt Squornshelous, does that mean that we suck? I mean, Squornshelous is the dumbest nation under the sun. People there are basically told to just follow the leader and to believe whatever they say. Such a team is actually _winning_ against us? Even though only closely? How does that not equal a disgrace? So? they won the last cup... what other does that mean than they having more luck than the others?

Apparently. I mean, they also had loads of luck in this match, but what else? Skill? surely, but we too! Kansu? Not more than us. The quality, we were searching was something like compataiblity. Since these players all think alike from choldhood on, they function well together. this might have been the thing, which cuased us to lose here.

No I do not intend to make sense, I am pissed. As in drunk. Drunk on cheap hooch because I wanted to clear my mind from this match. And failed!

Somewhere in Oliverry...

Jamie Tremblay: We won against Backwardistan?

Jean-Alan Bellemort: Yes... only 1-0 though...

Jamie Tremblay: Really? That must be a really bad result then... right?

Jean-Alan Bellemort: Yes... (looks down in shame). I know we should have done better, but that's life.

Jamie Tremblay: That's life? How dare you say that?!?!? Our team is supposed to be the fourth best in the world, and you screw that game... What is happening now? Too much booze? Too much Limbrogidlian food? Too much practicing at waving a white flag? Come on... Don't lie to me...

Jean-Alan Bellemort: Well, I don't know the reason. Guys were pumped up before the game and were ready to win the game... whatever happened is unclear to me... It might be related to System Karela's va'karela'ny or something...

Jamie Tremblay: Va'karela'ny is only a creation from the mind imaginated to make our children affraid... They were created by Richard, the former president of the AOS, remember?

Jean-Alan Bellemort: Jamie... I saw some from my own eyes! Some players of the national team may also pretend to have seen some... They were produced by Rejistanians first, but many of them all moved to System Karela to put their faith into Defense, so they produced some to prevent people from scoring in any sport...

Jamie Tremblay: Are you feeling ok Jean-Alan? I can being you some calmants or drug if you need... I know some good dealers and you could get the latest hard drug for really cheap... Wait a minute... Do you know the same dealer as me?

Jean-Alan Bellemort: I'm not on drugs, nor drunk. I'm just telling you the truth...

Jamie Tremblay: I guess I'm going to call the hospital for mental diseases... You've got a problem there...

Jean-Alan Bellemort: I have a va'karela... let me show you...

[Bellemort takes his package and gets a kind of gun out of it]

Jean-Alan Bellemort: See? They really exist!

Jamie Tremblay: May I try on you?

Jean-Alan Bellemort: Sure!

[Jamie presses on the button and "karelizes" Jean-Alan]

Jean-Alan Bellemort: Attack all the way!! Han'il takil!! Slani!! Any other Rejistanian word that has no sense at all...

Jamie Tremblay: This is just a va'takil... Ok then... Let's see how the team will do offensively now...

Hello Netizens,

Okay, where should I start on Haraki? Maybe in Sike. In Estadije Sike Veran, the first match against Haraki took place according to a quick yacy¹. What I want to say, without sounding like the old fart, which you think I am anyways just by reading this paragraph us, that Haraki vs Rejistania has a history. A _history_ even. This does not mean much, except some memes becoming emergent in fan chants and media broadcasting. It surely does not prevent the match from sucking big time. I have seen better matches, even in the H5SR, you can believe me that. Okay, there were 2 goals, one goal-by-sheer-stupid (yes, H~seli I Li, this means you) and one probably-own-goal. but these scenes were the only thing remarkable about the match and could NOT compensate for the bore, we had to endure between them. Fans even chanted the KaMaRi-song... _despite it was an away-game_! But well, 3 points are 3 points, so I should stop ranting. Instead let's look at the light side: _there are teams playing worse soccer than we_. I of course refer here to Lake City Sharks who were DESTROYED by the Na~ovi Sekhika amateur reserves (or something in that skill-region). How even they could survive playing such utter slani, I fail to imagine!

¹don't get me started on this big international search engine, k? I know, it is according to y'all better, but I like me information unfiltered and uncensored, thank you very much!

MD 09 Cut off!

Can you believe it Milchama is doing work?

OOC: Since Mil missed a score in Group 2, I went ahead and completed it.

The HURD [2-3] Alasdair I Frosticus

Since I didn't think it merited it's own post in the scores thread, it's here.

QAZOXIAN TIMES

Oranges are an excellent source of Vitamin C, and victory as Qazox hopefully began its climb back into contetion witha win over underwhelming Florida Oranges.

Kyle Horton got the ball rooling in the 17th minute when he finished a set of nice crosses with Stefany Heisel down the pitch. Horton would score again just 7 minutes later to put the visitors up 2-nil.

The Black Oxen looked a bit peeved after allowing Schiavonia to come back in the waning minutes of the last match, and the Oranges had to suffer. Heisel scored in the 38th minute, putting Qazox up 3-0 at the half.

The second half saw little to no let up by the Oxen, who at times played as if it were a Cup final. The Oranges got on the score board in the 57th minute, but couldn't muster up any more offense, as the Black Oxen seemed to kick their offense into another gear. Sonja Clay made it 4-1 in the 66th minute following a spectactular pass from Fernando Turek. Clay re-paid Turek's pass with one of her own to Turek in the 75th minute that made the score 5-1. Stefany Heisel finished of the scoring in the 85th with a goal off a corner.

Up next is Stromboland, easily the worst team in the group. A win and Qazox will find themselves level at 4-0-4, but with 5 of the last 8 matches on the road, the early hole dug, maybe too much to overcome.

Game Summary:
Goals:
Qazox: Horton (5,6) 17', 24'; Heisel (5,6) 38', 85'; Clay (3) 66'; Turek (2) 75'
Florida Oranges: #2- 57'
Cards:
Qazox: None
Florida Oranges: None

"Are you sure this is even legal?" Mina said, looking over the loosely drawn plans.

"Yeah, all we have to do is everything the napkin says." Michael replied, pulling pieces of wood off the back of a truck.

"I don't really believe you want to do something this stupid."

"Hey, you're not the only one who wants to do stupid stuff every day."

-----

The completed structure was dragged out onto the practice field and sat on one of the penalty box. "What the hell is that supposed to be?"

"It's a catapault." Michael said, trying to wedge a wooden block under one of the wheels.

"Oooooh, is it one of those fancy counterweight ones?" Nina asked, walking around it and kicking the back of the frame.

"Hell no. Those are for pansies." Michael said, grabbing a soccer ball. "Watch this." Setting it in the cup of the catapult, Michael took a few steps back. Getting into a half duck, he pulled a rope connected to thepin and watched as the arm snapped up to nearly vertical and flung the ball across the field, flying gracefully into the net on the other end of the field. With a cry of victory, Michael began looking around for something else to throw.

"Wait, wait. I'm going to try and bicycle kick it." Nina said, running down to the other side of the field.

"What the hell is she going to try and do?" Mina asked, raising an eyebrow.

"She wants to bicycle kick the ball as it lands in the net on the other side. Get me another ball."

"No, let me fire it once." Mina said, frowning.

"Fine, after this, you can shoot something." Michael said, grabbing another ball. Firing it with the catapault, they watched in the distance as Mina saw it fly through the air, and attempted to kick it, though failing horribly and falling flat on her back.

"Try it again!"

Michael sighed. "You know, we might be stuck here all day at this rate."

Mina shrugged. "You have no idea what kind of evil you've unleashed on the world."

"Why?"

"Because, it's my turn to fire it."

"You know, try not to crush her skull with a rock."

"Naa, It'll be fine." Mina said, loading the catapult and firing it. The ball followed the same parabolic course across the field, where Nina was able to execute a moderately successful bicycle kick and direct the ball in the net.

While in the middle of her celebration, another object began it's flight through the air, landing a few feet in front of her. "Oh, you bastards, it was you who stole my shoes!"

Mina laughed. "You know, Michael, it's times like this when it feels good to bring a prank to it's well-deserved conclusion. If you'll excuse me..." she trailed off, turning and starting to run away when it became apparent that Nina had no intention of running over for just a friendly visit.

Michael sighed. "Damn, I'm going to have to push this thing back to the car on it's own."

Dazza:
Hi, this is Dazza Dallas for THE FOOTBALL LIFE ONE ON ONE. Well, now it's ONE ON TWO because we had to interview someone else as well as striker Big Gay Al. New midfielder - who was a defender last game and Monique Alexander is here with me too. Woah, one on TWO sounds kinky, thinking about. No this is not a porno - eh yeah.

Big Gay Al: Hi super viewers
Monique: Hi cuties.

Dazza:
Firstly, let's just round the scores again for the benefit of everyone. The girls from Dorian and Sonya failed to score against the lowly Dumania, ONE ALL. Two crap teams The Gold TyGrr and Seckland drew ONE ALL as well. Cuation hit the Yafor 2 team with 1 NIL defeat and Jeruselem smashed Bettia, FOUR ONE. Oh and Nedalia trashed Nebuleux FOUR TWO.

Dazza: Firstly, Big Gay Al - what a game from you! A hat-trick!
Big Gay Al: Thanks Dazza. I was just doing the job for the team.
Dazza: Your form had been really good of late. The best striker in the team by far, and you're the first gay player in the team.
Big Gay Al: It's doesn't matter if you're gay or not, what matter is how much heart you put into the game.

Dazza: You've been putting in the big games but this was not expected. We were playing Bettia - who had not lost or draw a game and we smashed them. An amazing effort.
Big Gay Al: It's all for the team.
Dazza: And Monique, you and me are alike in some ways. Now a midfielder, and showing some of older players a thing or two.
Monique: I'm just a defender really, filling in your position for the rest of this cup I guess. I can't replace you as I'm not real superstar. I just doing my best.

Dazza: We both also tend underdress a little in front of cameras eh? (smiles)
Monique: True, I do that for a living while you do it for attention. Still it brings in the money so we both can have a decent living. My bosses like you too. You push the line on public TV while I have live in the shadows.
Dazza: I'm just a horny bitch as my husband says. Because of that I'm not playing any more games.
Monique: We want you back in the team. The team isn't the same without you.

Dazza: Al, how did you push your way into this team. A gay person making the Jeruselem is rare - you're the first.
Big Gay Al: By being myself. I know I'm gay, and don't hide it. Over time people get to know me and they work out I'm just another person with the same problems. I worked hard to get here, scoring goals for the fans who hate and love me. Now, I do it for the nation - whether fans love or hate me.
Dazza: I heard about the death threats you get.
Big Gay Al: Yeah but I got scared by them then I lose. If they take me out, I've got bigger friends who will help me or take revenge. Life is too short to be scared.

Dazza: Your real name is Albert Schultz?
Big Gay Al: Yes, but just call me Al as the song goes.

Dazza: Now, Monique - what was that goal you scored today. It was weird.
Monique: Oh that, I slipped actually.
Dazza: Looked kinda naughty the move
Monique: A sliding kick - it did look erotic.

Dazza: Actually, the keeper looked dazzled a little.
Monique: You and me do tend to dazzle male soccer players, lying flat on the ground.
Dazza: Well, that's it from the FOOTBALL LIFE, ONE ON TWO. We beat Bettia! and top the table but we have resting days coming. Bettia will be back on top for sure. Aw, another kinky comment.
Monique: I think the viewers love it
Big Gay Al: Me too


FYI

Group 10:
Dorian and Sonya [1] Dumania [1]
Seckland [1] The Gold TyGrr [1]
Yafor 2 [0] Cuation [1]
Bettia [1] Jeruselem [4]

Group 5:
Nebuleux [2] Nedalia [4]

“Happy? Hell yes, I’m happy with this result!” yells out Samantha Neesa.

Mikaela Eyre quickly turns from Samantha to the camera.

“What? We’re on the air? I never got my cue… Ahem… Good evening, wherever you may be. I’m Mikaela Eyre reporting live from Wentland. Tonight, Assegai returned to Wentland since both teams faced each other in the latest Cup of Harmony. Last time, the best the still inexperienced Assegai squad could muster was a 1-3 loss to Wentland. This time, however…”

“We drew 1-1!” chirps Samantha. “Wooooooooooooooo!”

Mikaela stares at her as Samantha jumps up and down and dances next to her.

“Uh, yeah, like she said, Assegai Developments continued to raise eyebrows around the NS footballing world, this time earning a well-deserved 1-1 draw against a very game Wentland side.”

Samantha calms downs and smiles at Mikaela.

“Wentland didn’t waste any time, catching Assegai keeper Edward van de Beauchamp off balance in the second minute of play, allowing forward Lennie Newton to chip in a shot over the flailing arms of van de Beauchamp, giving Wentland the very early 1-0 lead.

“However, that’s when Assegai put the clamps on Wentland’s attack. In fact, that would be Wentland’s only shot on goal in the rest of the first half. Although, Assegai pressed on the attack with forward Severus Snape back in the lineup, their determination failed to translate into any serious shots at the goal. Invariably, the game became a defensive battle, with both teams playing air-tight defense. At the half, it was still Wentland up 1-0.

“Things didn’t change much in the second half, and although Wentland began to make runs at Assegai’s goal, none of them were of any threat. The game continued to be battled mostly at midfield, as both teams refused to back down on defense.

“Sensing the stalemate, at the 77th minute, Assegai manager Sir Knight Edgard Zúniga made a couple of substitutions, replacing midfielder Agatha Denys for Duane Grissom and frustrated forward Severus Snape for Stephen de Cobham.

“Both players were like a breath of fresh air, with Denys re-energizing the midfield and de Cobham unsettling the weary Wentland defenders. Then, with 3 minutes to go, Assegai midfielder Alys Spicer made a run down the sideline before sending a looping cross that was headed down by forward Samantha Neesa into open space. Wentland keeper Crash Robinson and de Cobham made a mad dash for the ball, with Wentland sliding in to boot the ball beneath Robinson’s reach and into the goal.”

“Weeeeee!” exclaims Samantha all of a sudden. “Stephen rocks!”

Mikaela nods, smiling. “The goal quickly silenced the raucous home crowd, and Assegai held on for the 1-1 draw, earning a modest applause from the home supporters.”

“That was very cool,” says Samantha with a big grin. “Big ups to all the Wentland supporters and players. They’ve always been very cool, even supplying us with kits during the Cup of Harmony when our official kits were sent to Elves Security Forces by mistake. By the way, did E.S.F. win tonight?”

“Why, yes, they did, 2-0 over Nomadasia,” responds Mikaela.

“What about the rest of the teams from The YoungWorld?” asks Samantha.

“Can you believe that Fort Europe managed a draw with the top team in their group, The Archregimancy?” asks Mikaela.

“WOW! That’s impressive!” says Samantha excitedly. “However, the best thing was that we got this draw! You know, we might not make it to the World Cup, but we’re going to fight all the way down.”

“Well, that’s good to hear, Samantha, because up next is one of your toughest challenges, No. 14 Schiavonia,” says Mikaela. “Assegai better bring their ‘A’ game to this one.”

“Well, we’ll be back in the friendly confines of Cathedral Park, and with our supporters behind us, I think we can give Schiavonia a scare or two, although we all realize that they’re incredibly strong,” says Samantha in a serious tone. “More than anything, though, it’ll be nice to be back home.”

“Well, this is about all the time we have tonight,” says Mikaela. “On behalf of Samantha Neesa and our production crew, I’m Mikaela Eyre, bidding you a good night, live from Wentland. Good night, everybody!”

Match Summary

http://spaam.mrdrake.net/flags/wentland.png Wentland 1
http://spaam.mrdrake.net/flags/assegai_developments.png Assegai Developments 1

[WLD]
Lennie Newton (2’)

[AD]
Stephen de Cobham (87’)

-!- JCoulton is now talking in #6moremonths@irc.sportchat.org
-!- Topic is: The HURD [0-0] Alasdair I Frosticus! Good luck, Tytso Tyler! Happy hacking!
<malloc> hi JCoulton! Welcome to #6moremonths!
<JCoulton> Saluton!
<malloc> Cxu vi parolas esperanton?
<JCoulton> No, I don't speak esperanto. it's not as if everyone saying Aloha knows Hawaiian..
<CygnusX> Hi JCoulton, another one interested in the match? that makes it 3!
<JCoulton> there are 12 users in this channel!
<CygnusX> Some of them are idle over one year!
<malloc> They are no HURDists!
<WirthIsGod> HURD not has the stability for one year uptime?
<malloc> not yet!
<JCoulton> ah *idles*
<WirthIsGod> What OS are you running, JCoulton?
<JCoulton> Microcosm windoze
-!- Chanserv sets mode +o WirthIsGod
<JCoulton> jk!
<JCoulton> UNEK
<@WirthIsGod> urk...
<CygnusX> Better than this "OS" from Monopolysoft!
<CygnusX> You're Rejistani?
<JCoulton> HURDist, just have a slow computer and any attempt to run a decent Unix on it made my PC crawl!
<@WirthIsGod> A PC which has spare ressources just has too few processes on it!
<JCoulton> Oh shit!
<malloc> What?
<JCoulton> TBA 0 AIF 1 5th minute, $player
<@WirthIsGod> FUCK!
-!- WirthIsGod changes the topic of #6moremonths to: The HURD [0-1] Alasdair I Frosticus! Good luck, Tytso Tyler! Happy hacking!
<JCoulton> Bad reaction by Lynx.
<malloc> You watch the match on your PC?
<JCoulton> Of course, while rendering 3d-images and listening to Ogg-Vorbis!
<JCoulton> My PC has 3 MHz, ffs!
* malloc faints
* WirthIsGod refuses to believe that!
<JCoulton> I have an Acceleron 4!
<CygnusX> *loooooooooooooooooooooooool*
<CygnusX> Why?
<JCoulton> well, can't afford anything better since currency is not implemented yet!
* CygnusX can give you a Sistenha Ines...
<JCoulton> that would be great!
<CygnusX> it's 160 MHz and 32 Megabytes of RAM. Absolute shitbox!
<JCoulton> Well, I fell into deep hack mode a few years ago and now woke up only to see my system being deprecated...
<malloc> coool!
<malloc> What did you write?
<JCoulton> You know, Listig of the FU-Fighters asked for the improved pattern recognition system?
<malloc> No one dared to attempt that approach...
* JCoulton did!
* JCoulton uploaded it to freshmeat.tba
<malloc> W00t!
...
Later
...
-!- WirthIsGod changes the topic of #6moremonths to: The HURD [0-3] Alasdair I Frosticus! Tytso Tyler, WTF? Happy hacking!
<CygnusX> We need to contact Tyler!
<malloc> Why?
<CygnusX> JCoulton's code, upgrade
<malloc> ingame-P?
<CygnusX> Of course!
* CygnusX looks at JCoulton
* malloc looks at JCoulton
* WirthIsGod stares at JCoulton
* BigBrother is watching JCoulton
<CygnusX> JCoulton, you do have a phone, right?
<JCoulton> What's that?
<CygnusX> Sorry, forgot that we're in the HURD, mail Tyler!
<JCoulton> you have his address?
* JCoulton has not found it yet.
<malloc> TyTy@WorldChampionByNextYear.tba
* JCoulton sends

...
later
...

<malloc> Hey, am I wrong or did the GNU nce not mispass?
<CygnusX> Chance!
* BigBrother also noticed a better play in the last minutes, do you think Tyler upgraded?
<WirthIsGod> he did, I saw that.
<malloc> Great, JCoulton!
<JCoulton> We'll see!
-!- WirthIsGod changes the topic of #6moremonths to: The HURD [1-3] Alasdair I Frosticus! GNU POWER!! Happy hacking!!!



The match ended The HURD [2-3] Alasdair I Frosticus!

Dear Diary,

At the 69th minute of the World Cup 32 qualifying match against Voskadouria at the B Triple R the visitors scored a goal. In almost every way it was an unremarkable goal. The Voskies, although gallant, aren’t in the same league as the potoroos. The goal resulted from a penalty kick after the normally reliable and disciplined defender motucku laid a crude and unnecessary tackle on a Vosky striker who had entered the penalty area. It was scored against the run of play after the home team had already scored twice (venu, 5, and rosaniel, 20) and then score twice more (addicksonia, 86, and rosaniel, 89) leaving the final result at 4-1. The visiting fans were small in number but I have never seen such enthusiastic and rowdy fans as I did that day.

So, what was so memorable about that goal? Well, this is Voskadouria’s first World Cup campaign; their seventh match; and their seventh loss. They are at the bottom of the group table. But it was their team’s first ever goal in international football.

To honour the Vosky’s achievement we subsequently mounted the ball on a beautiful blackwood plinth with a gold plaque bearing the words, “Best wishes for a long and rewarding World Cup future.”

It was a privilege to concede the goal. We know how disheartening a World Cup campaign can be when you are unrated. Errinundera entered World Cups 26 and 30 unrated. How we struggled in those campaigns. Perseverance is the key.

Up until the 69th minute, motucku had played extremely well. She and phazel had been the star defenders so far this campaign. It all counted for nothing as she was immediately substituted.

She’s a funny creature. Her right foot is slightly twisted so that when she stands with her knees in the same direction that foot points a little to the right. It doesn’t seem to handicap her. Being a mollydooker probably helps. She is also noted for her ability to quickly adjust to the changing tempo during a game.

http://i55.photobucket.com/albums/g136/regnans/East%20Gippsland/motucku.jpg

This ability is not so surprising when you discover that she is also a highly trained and skilled percussionist and hopes to play in a symphony orchestra when her footballing days come to an end. Her favourite instrument is the marimba but she is equally at home with the snare drum, the tymani and the triangle. She also likes cymbals and gongs. The louder the better.

Next week we are home again, this time to Commerce Heights JSY at Frosty Hollow. There are early season bushfires just north of Rooty Break that are still burning out of control two weeks after the original lightning strikes. We can only hope they don’t impact upon the game.

Speaking of fires, protestors in First Creek Falls have, yet again, burnt down sections of the upfalls area of the city.

How dreary. You’d think that after 4 years of drought they’d have more sense.

Yours faithfully.

mckennap
Foot masseur, ankle strapper and boot studder to the potoroos.

JALBYR USS HOJJ ULU BAHK'TESS

NSWC Match 7

Fort Europe – 1 - v – 1 - The Archregimancy

Another team fails to dominate against an impressive Fort Europe side at home at the Commonwealth Stadium in front of a sell out croud. Fort Europe came out on their home turf looking to shut down the superior play of group nine leaders The Archregimancy who remain unbeaten in the competition so far, and for the most part they managed to do so. It was not an easy game for the fly boys who looked nervous at the back at times and conseded a fabulous goal towards the end of the first half. However they fought back hard and forced home the equiliser to collect a well deserved point. Fort Europe still lie in third place in the group now four points above their closest threat and three points below second placed Starblaydia, surely a good position from which to mount a serious attempt at qualification.

PLAYER RATINGS
(Out of 10)

7 - James West
7 - Floe Peltsten
8 - Tim Forrester (C)
7 - Aki Haddon
8 - Gemma Lloyd
8 - Katherine Keller
7 - Ryan Holmes []
9 - Vicky Princess (72)
8 - Mia Nevola
8 - Michelle Bishop
7 - Karl Isaak

SUBS

- - Tom Reas
8 - Laura Harris (On for Peltsten (45))
- - Murphy Lee
- - Edowine Sanjuan
7 - Josephine Blanchard (On for Isaak (70))

If one has to be a light instillation there are probably few better places to end up than the Temple of Yak. To get to illuminate major football matches by itself is really nice. But the architecture and the creepiness of the stadium builds a wonderful atmosphere, especially for night games. To play a part in setting that atmosphere is just divine.

You could tell straight from the start that Okielahoma players looked unnerved about playing in the Temple. The place seemed to rattle there sensibilities. When you combined that with there nerves about playing the higher ranked Gnomes you could almost make out the sweat on their faces as the national anthems were being played, even from my heights way at the top of the stadium.

Being a light means that you absolutely can see the whole pitch. Therefore I wasn't at all suprised by the opening goal as I saw Ml-Dni sneak up the pitch to corrall Pizelkaxrovsky's pass and swing it quickly on to a waiting Stanleyinho in the box who blasted home the goal.

The Gnomes added another goal in the first half from the foot of Pizelkaxrovsky and Kn-Dg added one early in the second half. No goals came from the Okielahoma side as the pressure of the match clearly got to them.

I expected to be finsihed when the match ended but there were many festivities still going on after the match had finished so I continued to glow in the Jex-Kia night sky for quite a while after the match.

Amda-Mo: Another Az-cz match, another Az-cz win, tonight 3-0 over Okielahoma.

Lur-Mn: Yes, the Gnomes were in control the whole time and never looked much like Okielahoma was going to be a problem?

Amda-Mo: What was the explanation for that?

Lur-Mn: Just better all around team play. They got to good spots on the pitch and the Okielahoma players seemed unsettled. Easy running.

Amda-Mo: I see. Let's quickly turn to our next match, a huge battle for control of the top of the group against Liverpool England.

Lur-Mn: Indeed quite a match. Here we are the last match of the first half and both teams are still undefeated. Liverpool England has been far and away the best team up to this point.

Amda-Mo: What would you say the key to the game is.

Lur-Mn: Our offense. You might think that in a match pitting two teams tied for fewest goals allowed we'd be in for a defensive battle, but that's not the case. Liverpool England is an offensive juggernaut, averaging more than 4 goals a game and we're averaging more than three. Despite the stellar play of our defense up until now, I still think Liverpool England will score. Our job is to score more.

Amda-Mo: So who are the key players then?

Lur-Mn: Well the players who have the most swing potential are Stanleyinho and Levesque. If they're playing well and the offense is firing at full force we could well pull the upset, but if they're not playing well and Liverpool England can really key on Pizelkaxrovsky and Kn-Dg we'll have trouble.

Amda-Mo: How important is this match?

Lur-Mn: Honestly it shouldn't be that important. Even if we lose we'll still have at least a three point cushion on third place and a seven point cushion for the last qualifying spot. So a loss really isn't that big of a deal. Which I think will help the team stay calm.

Amda-Mo: You're prediction.

Lur-Mn: I'd like to say we'll get points, but I think Liverpool England will get us. But I think it will be close. Liverpool England 3 - Az-cz 2

Amda-Mo: Alright. Tonight's final segment will be about (reaches into box) househould appliances.

Well Pizelkaxrovsky is the microwave. He gets everything heated up quickly for us.

And Gn-Lg is the refrigerator. He is the one that saves everything.

Nerazzuri was the telephone tonight. He really facilitated communication throughout the pitch and earned his captain's band.

Quakmybush 1 - 0 Vilita

Paladins also play match

NEW MONTREAL - I'm Carlos the Night Shift Janitor, and I'm here to tell you the truth.

Top of the list, we've got the Quakmybush (which sounds like a hardcore porn flick)-Viltia match, which would determine who remained tied for first with the Paladins. The up-and-coming Quakmybushis (Quakmybushers? Quakmybushistanis? Quakers?) managed to seize a lead over the Jungle Cats by winning 1-0 in a very well-played and surprisingly defense-oriented (at least by Vilitan standards) match.

The Paladins also won, 3-1, over some upstart newcomer called "Race Track." Why they're too cool to play on a regular pitch, I don't know. Snobs.

Finally, we have the topic of scallions. Scallions are a communist plot! They cause halitosis, infertility, and indigestion. Seriously, anyone who looks at a scallion and cannot see the touch of Satan they bear is blind. We all must step up and do our part to eliminate this green-and-white crunchy menace!

I've been Carlos the Night-Shift Janitor. Peace up and A-Town down, or something like that.

PALADINS 3 - Colbert 24, Corcoran 66, Chung 88
RACE TRACK 1

[In the office of the Revolutionarian Football Association]

Rep 1: Right, let's look in the media...

...

From a couple of weeks ago...*ahem*

So what exactly has happened to the Dance 2 Revolution national team? Once 1st in the world, now failing to qualify more than should be allowed. Coming to World Cup 32 now and we still haven't got a manager and a squad...what have we become?

Rep 2: How are we supposed to rectify this situation

Rep 3: Well...we could send a strong team and train really hard next cup.

Rep 1: Wait a minute...hasn't World Cup 32, like, started...

Rep 2: Crap! We haven't sent a team!! What are we going to do?

Rep 3: Not much we can do now, looks like we're already seven matches in!

Rep 2: So I suppose that puts us on negative 21 points then...seven forfeits...

Rep 3: Let me have a look...

[Rep 3 heads towards a computer to check on Dance 2 Revolution's group]

Rep 3: Looks like we have made a good error, there is absolutely no chance we'd qualify from this group...Vilita, Quakmybush, New Montreal States, Kericia and Anastasiania? Why bother?

Rep 1: That's a pretty bad group, but I fear the authorities at the World Cup won't be happy with this. They mightn't let us in qualifying again!

Rep 2: Damn! What are we going to do now?

Rep 1: Well we could change our national sport, i'm sure we can climb to the top of another sport...

Rep 3: Wait! I don't think we will have to...

Rep 1: What exactly are you saying?

Rep 3: Erm, i'm not quite sure how this happened...but...We're not on minus 21...

Rep 2: What exactly ARE we on then?

Rep 3: We are...on...13...points

Rep 2: How?

Rep 3: Well we beat Quakmybush and Anastasiania!

Rep 1: But we don't have any players playing the matches...hell...we don't have a manager!!!!

Rep 3: Apparently we do, I think we're going to have to check up on what exactlyl is going on

Rep 2: We might qualify!!

Rep 1: Don't count on it, but we may qualify...for the Cup of Harmony...

Rep 2: So...WHO exactly is playing our matches...?

...


...

[In the Dance 2 Revolution Camp]

??? [Manager]: Right lads! We're doing really well at the moment, a bit more effort and we can push for qualification. I'm happy to see the defence has tightened up since the first two matches, and the attacking partnerships are starting to work well. Just keep it going.

??? [Midfielder, Captain]: The New Dance 2 Revolution revolution has begun, and we are all part of it. We must do what all squads before us have failed to do... What all the supporters and the D2R footballing authorities cannot stand to do...We must forget our past, our history...until we can procede beyond the point for need of remeniscense! That phase starts now!!

"We lost to Aurendia, we lost to Casari - a load of rubbish girls, then Fmjphoenix and now Marcuau State!" Said an impatient Lucius Andrews, who is usually calm.


"I'm suprised you're angry" Said a startled Brett Starr "You didn't think we'd hit the ground running didcha?"


"Well we should win a few." Said Lucius sternly "We're playing Spindomia at home. Let's make sure we win that one."


"What're the tacs, commander?" Asked an excited Craig Steele.


"First off..." Began Lucius Andrews "Vesputous, you're taking a back-seat."


"What?!" Excalimed Vesputous "But I've been doing pretty well lately!"


"Pretty well indeed." Said Lucius sarcastically "Thirteen goals against New Propagandia and seven of them came from your wing!"


"So who's taking my place?" Asked Vesputous inquisitively.


"Santo Cainos." Mr. Andrews replied.


"Me?" Blurted out a startled Cainos with a rubix cube in his hand, he wasn't even listening untill Vesputous question.


"Him?!" Exclaimed Vesputous at the same time.


"Yes him." Nodded Andrews "I want to see what he does on that wing."


"This is ridiculous, he's not even left-footed." Argued and irate Vesputous.


"But he has the pace and he has the potential." Andrews said frowning.


"Any other changes?" Asked Khuzaymah, impatiently.


"Yes." Said Andrews "Midfield. Reyes out. Chesly in."


The room was startled, Lucius was really stirring things up in the team. Starr sighed. Reyes looked sad and Reem looked a bit annoyed.


"What's with all these changes?" Asked Reem.


"I want to shake things up, to add a new element to confuse the Spindomians." Replied Andrews.


"Well this is a bit much.." Began Carr.


"A bit much? But I have one more change to make." Said Andrews.


Nielson hung his head in shame, Lucius wasmoving down in positions, it had gotten to forwards, he wouldn't remove Starr who was the Captain and he was next.


"Ian Nielson will be replaced by... Flint Wurst."


Flint Wurst grinned with excitement. Nielson held his head in his hands. He was dissapointed that he'd been dropped though he didn't know for how long, but on the other side of the coin he knew he'd performed very poorly, he hadn't scored a single goal yet and he'd had plenty of chances. Then Andrews reached into his back and took out a sheet of paper.


"So the squad looks like this.."


GK: Liberkine
RB: Smithson
CB: Red
CB: Hayden
LB: Cainos
DM: Lovett
RM: Ryane
LM: Steele
AM: Chesly
STR: Starr
STR: Wurst


".. In the four-four-two diamond formation."


"This isn't right." Protested Vesputous.


"Gaius." Snapped Carr "This is a simple tinkering of the left back role to try and strengthen our defence. It might not even be permanent. Just bear it for now."


Vesputous grumbled.


"So I want you to do your best to best Spindomia, ok? We can't afford this loss, this streak is both embarresing and shameful. You need to go out there and play the game of your lives." Said Andrews, inspirational as ever.


"Oh and boys." Said Starr with a grin "Don't forget to sheild your eyes at the right time. Remember, streaking's legal."

"What do you mean the computer crashed?"

"Er, it crashed. Blue screen of death. Report lost."

"So what the bloody heck are we going to put in the paper now?"

"I dunno, can't we copy someone's?"

"No, they'll sue..."

"Hang on, maybe we can copy one from Assegai. They'll never notice."

"Oh, and you have Assegai papers?"

"No, but I have their telly on my megadish...gimme a mo and I'll knock something up..."


Wentland didn’t waste any time, catching Assegai keeper Edward van de Beauchamp off balance in the second minute of play, allowing forward Lennie Newton to chip in a shot over the flailing arms of van de Beauchamp, giving Wentland the very early 1-0 lead.

However, that’s when Wentland decided to sit back and wait for Assegai to bring the game to them. In fact, that would be Wentland’s only shot on goal in the rest of the first half. Which was one more than Assegai managed, even though they pressed on the attack with forward Severus Snape back in the lineup, who is a cult hero in Assegai for his ludicrous name. Invariably, the game became a defensive battle, as Assegai were scared of Wentland. At the half, it was still Wentland 1-0.

Things didn’t change much in the second half, and although Billy Lawrence began to make runs at Assegai’s goal out of sheer boredom, none of them were of any threat. The game continued to be battled mostly at midfield, as Assegai refused to come forward.

Sensing the stalemate, at the 77th minute, Assegai manager Sir Knight Edgard Zúniga made a couple of substitutions, replacing midfielder Agatha Denys for Duane Grissom and frustrated forward Severus Snape for Stephen de Cobham.

This meant Assegai attacked more, although there was still no threat as de Cobham failed to unsettle the weary Wentland defenders. Then, with 3 minutes to go, Assegai midfielder Alys Spicer made a run down the wing before mis-hitting a looping cross that was headed down by forward Samantha Neesa into open space. Wentland keeper Crash Robinson and de Cobham made a mad dash for the ball, with Robinson seemingly gaining control of the ball but being booted in the testicles by de Cobham, unseen by the referee, thus dropping the ball and allowing Assegai to fluke an equalizer.

The goal quickly silenced the raucous home crowd, and Assegai held on for the 1-1 draw, earning a modest applause from the home supporters.

"Er, that didn't happen for the equalizer, did it?"

"What do you mean?"

"Well, Robinson was beaten to it by de Cobham?"

"Yeah, but that don't sell papers."

"Well, let's run it. The Assegai chaps won't notice."

"I hope."

The Daily Quak
One Up For The Fish

The Quakmybush Sharks continued their World Cup 32 qualifying run yesterday. The team was in Quakmybush for a game against World Cup 20 Champions Vilita. The Sharks do have a higher ranking then the opponents, however Vilita has much more experience. The Sharks came out to a exstatic crowd in the Fort Erie stadium. The Sharks appeared to be nervous at the start of the game, with Harry Gait attempting to pass up to Jon Fields, however that pass was intercepted and #3 had a breakaway, however Cam Carroll made a spectacular save to keep the game at 0-0. The Sharks shook of the early jitter, then had a chance of their own. Jon Fields came down the leftr side crossed the ball over to Ryan Fret, Fret shot the ball and it hit the bar, still 0-0. The teams traded possession throught the half and went to the break at 0-0. Quakmybush won the possession game with 51% possession. The Sharks came back out with their game faces on. They started out much quicker in the second half. Cory Sorley, Jon Fields, and Ben Miller all had chances within the first 10 minutes of the half, and finally they cracked the Vilitian keeper. Jon Fields came down the the end line, attempted a pass to Cory Sorley, Sorley misplayed it, the ball then rolled to and unexpecting Ryan Fret who kicked the ball into the back of the net, making it 1-0 Quakmybush. The Sharks then thought they had the game sealed when Jon Fields ran past the defenders and came down on the keeper. Fields took a blistering shot that the keeper managed to save to keep it 1-0. The Sharks then had a share when a Vilitian forward burst through the midfield and the defenders and took a shot, however Cam Carroll came up big to keep the score 1-0. That is how the game had ended.

Quakmybush - 1
Fret 58'

Vilita - 0
None

Next up the Sharks will travel to Anastasiania to take on the 65th ranked side, who currently sit fifth in the group table. The Sharks will hope to get three points.

Goal Scorers
Jon Fields - 9
Cory Sorley - 5
Matthew Graves - 3
Andrew Plett - 1
Ben Miller - 1
Ryan Fret - 1
Mike Martin - 1
Clifford Baker - 1
Darrel Ralegigh - 1

Article By: Rick Juras

Rise of the Turtles
Editorial by Makou Nnebe

The Turtles stay solid in fourth and keep up with Qutar, trailing only one point. The cause: a 4-1 victory of Algal States. This happens to be the second 4-1 win over Algal States, which occured during the previous qualifiers. This final match of Round 1 of the Qualifiers leaves Sel Appa with a good lead over five other teams. The next matchday is a bye for the Turtles, but a friendly will be played at Elves Security Forces, which should prove to be an interesting match.

Sel Appa has already had one friendly during these qualifiers against Bazalonia, which was a 4-4 draw. Many see this friendly as a possible draw as well. Regardless, the friendly will, of course, have no effect on Sel Appa's World Cup tryout. It will be marked on the Turtles' record, which currently is 14-11-27, with 69 goals fielded and 104 conceded. Sel Appa has a good hope in international football to become a great team, however the path gets harder as the team moves up the ranks. It will take the hard work of the team and its three-term coach, Charles DuPont.

DuPont has brought the team far after its debut during the 30th World Cup qualifiers. DuPont has been kept as coach because of his hard work and determination to reach the top. Despite a low win-record of about 33%, he has held the team together and kept them from losing hope when needed. Now, when the team is finally rising high during a qualifiers, DuPont is there with his team and making sure they hold their ground or not give it up without a fight.



Team PL W D L PT GF GA NG
Liverpool England 7 7 0 0 21 30 2 +28
Az-Cz 7 6 1 0 19 23 2 +21
The Islands of Qutar 7 4 1 2 13 18 11 +7
Sel Appa 8 3 3 2 12 15 17 -2
Cataduanes 7 2 3 2 9 13 13 +0
Okielahoma 7 2 1 4 7 6 11 -5
Algal States 7 2 0 5 6 6 22 -16
Tocapa 7 1 1 5 4 8 17 -9
Anrow 7 0 0 7 0 4 28 -24

"This is Larry "Bark" Dogman reporting for New Propagandia News Network and I'm traveling all over the country to show just how much of an impact the World Cup 32 has made on our fair nation."


The Man with greying black hair with a round head, brown eyes and white pale skin in a brown trenchcoat was on the camera with a microphone. There was the city of Gainom, covered in snow behind him.


"We'll start here, in Gainom who are boasting such players as Callum Smithson and Antonio Reyes currently playing for their club. This city may look ghostly, not a soul around but I wouldn't blame them with the temperature currently at minus ten degrees, this is a relatively warm Wintersday for them. Of course regardless of the temperature, we'll find them inside."


The scene then cuts to Dogman inside an indoor football training centre, endorsed by Gainom Xenia for it's youth.


"Here I am at the Gainom Xenia Sports Centre for Youths. Currently playing are two teams of eleven children. Let's watch."


A super-fast edited version of them playing is shown.


"As you can see they aren't just kicking around, these kids plan to be New Propagandia's future stars."


He then interviewed a short pale true New Propagandian 6 year old.


"So I take it you're a football supporter?" Asked Dogman.


"Yep." Replied the Child.


"And who are your heroes?" Asked Dogman.


"Antonio Reyes and Brett Starr." Said the Child.


"Do you think New Propagandia will beat Spindomia tommorrow?" Asked Dogman.


"Yeah!" Yelled the Child.


It then cut to him talking to a mountain tribe Child who's skin was very tanned.


"So who do you think will win? New Propagandia?" Asked Dogman.


"No." Said the Child.


"What? Why not?" Replied Dogman.


"Because New Propagandia aren't very good, they need someone like me on the team." Replied the Child.


"And your name is Beaver?" Asked Dogman who obviously didn't like the Kid.


"It's Bevar." Said the Child angrily.


"That's nice Beaver." Said Dogman. The camera cut out just before the Bevar kicked him in the shin.


-------


"So here I am in sunny yet cold New El Dorado, at the local pub "The Xenolis Petropolis", where fans are getting merry and watching previous New Propagandian matches to get excited for the big game tomorrow."


Dogman talked to a couple of burly male fans at a table.


"So who do you support?" Asked Dogman.


"Dorado City of course!" Said the first Man who looked insulted at the question "Can't yer tell by ma t-shirt?"


"I support Dorado City too, but not fer long." Said the second.


"Why not?" Quizzed Dogman.


"That new thing Regent Dorado's 'startin up. Season tickets three quartuhs cheaper, I seen 'em 'trainin and they ain't 'alf bad." Replied the Second Man.


"You traitar." Joked the other one given his friend a slap on the back.


"So are New Propgandia going to win tommorrow?" Asked Dogman.


"Of course they are, what's he on about? Spindomia - no chance." Said the First.


"Well I dunno mate, I mean we lost 6-0 to a team with a bunch 'a girlies in. I reckon our yobs 'ave their work cut out." Said the Second.


"What a farse that was!" Said the First.


"So who are your favourite players?" Asked Dogman, wanting to change the subject.


"Er, let's see now.. It's gotta be Ryane 'ands down!" Said the First one before kissing Dorado City home shirt.


"Ryane's my favourite too, star player he is" Said the Second fan "But outside of New El Dorado I gotta say, Starr's a wonder."


Dogman then interviewed the Bartender.


"So who you think's gunna win tommorrow?" Dogman asked.


"Oh, Spindomia's gotta win! After a 'losin streak like ours I don't see us 'beatin anyone but good 'ol Choobie." Replied the Bartender before spitting into a dirty mug and wiping it clean with an old cloth.


"You don't think New Propagandia has a chance at all?" Asked Dogman who raised an eyebrow.


"Well it's football innit, anything can 'appen. But New Propagandia 'winnin.. If that 'appens remind me to put a bet on Thorn County 'winnin the league!" Said the Bartender before laughing, causing others who heard it to laugh at the joke. Dogman forced himself to chuckle.


"And who are your favourite players?" Asked Dogman.


"Nielson's brilliant, it doesn't show the world 'n that but he's brill like. Andrews, give 'im a good chance I guarentee that 'e'll be 'scorin in not time!"


------

Dogman was standing in a long winding alley-way in Cronom with a Muslim man and his two Children. a Boy and a Girl.


"So do you support New Propagandia despite being an immigrant?" Asked Dogman.


"Oh yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes!" Said the Muslim Man who was excited about being on television "I love New Propagandia, we are free, we are equals, we are happy!"


"So who are your favourite players?" Asked Dogman.


"Oh, Husaam Khuzaymah of course! Did you see him against Choobie? Wonderful!" Replied the Man.


"Khuzaymah!" Yelled his Kids excitedly, bobbing up and down.


"May I ask who you support?" Asked Dogman.


"Oh, of course. Yes I support Cronom naturally, there's Starr and Khuzaymah there and we are the champions. I also quite like Gainom Xenia and wish them luck in the future." He said, finally calming down.


"Thank you for your time." Said Dogman "I'm Larry "Bark" Dogman, and this was my coverage on the excitement football has caused in New Propagandia, all cultures, all people, football fanatics."

CAFUNDÉU CONTINUES WINNING!

http://img.terra.com.br/i/2006/09/16/396597-5665-ga.jpg
Heitor scored the goal of Cafundéu

If Cafundéu was surprising, it surprised again. The tickets sold for the game were so many that two days before the game the CCFM asked to build new sectors in the stadium to increase its capacity. And the happy supporters left the Obelisco Monumental, stadium of Petardos S/A, after the team defeated the powerful The Lowland Clans after scoring a goal in the beginning of the game. After the goal, The Lowland Clans attacked with strength, but Cafundéu replied with a good defense and with good attacks.

Cafundéu is still in the third place in the group, five points in front of Spaam and only two points behind the second placed, The Lowland Clans. Now Cafundéu will play away against Backwardistan, and the supporters are expecting another victory, as the team is playing incredible games. Millions of fans can be seen on the streets wearing black and red Cafundéu shirts or the second or the third kit. Even the emperor was seeing the game with his family.

THE GAME
The fans were very nervous before the start of the game, as the game was very difficult and it was starting to rain. It started with both teams trying to get the ball in the midfield. The game was very equal and the players were doing their best to help the team. In the first minute, The Lowland Clans could send the ball to the attack. Djukashenki dribbled Priotto and passed the ball to Jopolik. The attacker invaded the area and shot, but Julio Vargas could get the ball and made a great save.

In the 5th minute, the goal happened. Anormal took the ball from Joeira and passed to Ganz Ijak. The striker dribbled a defender and passed to Heitor, who only had to shot to score and hear the fans commemorating. The game didn’t changed very much after the goal, as both teams still continued to attack very well. And, before the 10th minute, nature started to participate in the game as the rain was very strong and raincoats started to be sold to the supporters.

13th minute: McGinney received the ball in the midfield and could invade the area. He shot, but Becão blocked the ball. He got the rebound and crossed to the area. Toldo headed the ball, but Vargas saved. 17th minute: Brahma received the ball in the midfield after Ray Kirs made a good play running from the left wing. He saw Heitor in a very good position and passed to him. The attacker couldn’t shot as a defender was marking him, so he passed to Anormal who shot from outside the area, but missed the goal.

20th minute: Priotto passed the ball to Kliek. The talented midfielder dribbled an opponent and crossed to the area, but Jurgensen headed the ball for a corner kick. Kliek took it and Becão headed, but he sent the ball over the bar. 24th minute: Doig received the ball from Delvin and dribbled Vandick. Then, he invaded the area, but Wantuirso took the ball from him and shot to the attack. McGinney got the ball and passed to Jopolik, who shot from outside the area, but sent the ball wide.

27th minute: Mackingley passed the ball to Djukashenki in the midfield, who was fouled by Kliek. The midfielder received the yellow card. Toldo received the ball near the area, dribbled Wantuirso and shot to the goal, but sent the ball over the bar, missing a good chance to score. 31st minute: Vandick passed the ball to Brahma. The midfielder created a good goal chance passing the ball to Ganz Ijak who was positioned inside the area. The attacker shot the ball, but it hit a defender and then the post.

http://img.terra.com.br/i/2006/08/05/380328-8028-ga.jpg
A difficult game for both sides

33rd minute: Joeira received the ball, but couldn’t control it and lost to Priotto. He tried to get the ball back, but fouled the defensive midfielder, receiving the yellow card. 34th minute: Doig made a good play in the left wing and crossed the ball to the area. Becão headed it to outside the area, but McGinney got the rebound and shot to the goal, obligating Vargas to make a great save. 36th minute: Anormal started a fast counterattack to Cafundéu and passed to Kliek. Anormal received the ball back and shot, but sent the ball over the bar.

40th minute: Doninho tacked Ganz Ijak and started a counterattack, passing to Joeira. The midfielder passed the ball to Jopelik, who invaded the area and had to pass the ball to Djukashenki, as Vandick was marking him. He shot, but sent the ball over the bar. 42nd minute: Ray Kirs started a counterattack and passed the ball to Priotto. The midfielder dribbled Joeira and passed to Brahma. The midfielder dribbled Jurgensen and passed to Ganz Ijak, but the attacker made a weak shot and Liptings got the ball back.

45th minute: Kliek received the ball after Wantuirso shot it from the defense. He decided to pass to Heitor, who was blocked by Mackingley. He passed to Anormal, who passed again to Kliek, who crossed to the area. Ganz Ijak headed, but sent the ball wide. Injury time: Delvin reached the attack after receiving the ball from Doig and crossed the ball to the area, where Toldo jumped higher than Vandick and headed, but Vargas saved one more time and the first half ended.

Braddock made only one change for the second half, putting Manuel Padaria in Kliek’s place. Casey Dellet put Mekij in Doninho’s place and Menheim in Joeira’s place, to try to get a better result in the second half. The rain continued strong, and after more than half an hour, the field was very wet, and puddles of water were common. It was very cold too, and because of this the players couldn’t pass well the ball, as the puddles of water stopped the ball sometimes.

5th minute: Priotto got the ball in the attack and passed to Heitor. The attacker received the ball and had good chances to score, but Liptings took the ball from him before he had time to shoot. 8th minute: Menheim received the ball in the midfield and went to the right side of the field. He crossed to Toldo, but the attacker missed the ball. McGinney got the rebound and shot to the goal, but he sent the ball wide. 9th minute: Jurgensen fouled Brahma and received the yellow card.

11th minute: Vandick came from the right side of the defense and passed to Anormal. The midfielder ran over Menheim and passed to Ganz Ijak. The attacker invaded the area and shot, but Liptings saved. After this play, Franz Braddock put Ernesto Ijak in Priotto’s place. 14th minute: Djukashenki received the ball after a mistake made by Manuel Padaria and reached the entrance of the area. He tried to score shooting from outside the area, but he sent the ball over the bar.

http://img.terra.com.br/i/2006/10/06/404898-7225-ga.jpg
The media was very interested in the game

18th minute: Manuel Padaria received the ball from Anormal, but lost the ball to Mekij. He battled for the ball and took it back. Then, he passed the ball to Brahma, who invaded the area and crossed to Ganz Ijak, who headed to the goal, but the ball hit the bar and then left the playing field. 21st minute: Mekij passed the ball to Menheim, who dribbled Anormal and shot before invading the area. Wantuirso headed the ball and it went for a corner kick, taken by McGinney. But he wasted the chance.

When the second half reached the twenty-second minute, Dellet made the last change in his team, putting Innisworth in the place of Toldo. 25th minute: Innisworth had his first chance in the game after receiving a pass from Doig. He shot, but Vargas saved easily, as his shot was very weak. 29th minute: Ray Kirs made a long pass to Brahma. The midfielder dribbled Delvin and passed the ball to Ernesto Ijak, who invaded the area and shot, but unfortunately he sent the ball wide.

32nd minute: Menheim got the ball in the right wing and crossed to the area. Becão missed the ball and Jopolik headed, but he sent the ball over the bar. At that time, the rain was weaker than it was when the second half started, but the wet grass made the game more difficult for both teams. 35th minute: Jurgensen slipped and fell on a puddle of water. Ernesto Ijak took the ball, dribbled Jurgensen again and passed to Ganz Ijak. The striker shot, the keeper gave the rebound and Heitor shot again, but Mackingley blocked the ball.

39th minute: Jopolik took the ball in the attack, and passed fast to Innisworth. The attacker shot to the goal, but the ball stopped in a puddle of water before it reached the goal. Wantuirso collected the ball and sent it to the attack. Before the 40th minute, Braddock made the last change in Cafundéu’s team, changing Vandick for Fuchs, as the right-back was very tired. 41st minute: Anormal got the ball and passed to Ernesto Ijak, but the attacker didn’t control the ball and missed the chance.

45th minute: The last chance of the game. Djukashenki dribbled Manuel Padaria and crossed to the area. Jopolik headed the ball, but Vargas saved. Fuchs received the ball and tried to start a counterattack, but it was too late. The referee ended the game and Cafundéu’s players started to commemorate the good victory. The emperor entered in the field with an umbrella and talked with the players and with the staff, proud of the good work made by the national team.

He said after the game: “Our country’s football national team is playing really well and making our country famous in the world.” The attacker Ernesto Ijak said to the media: “This wasn’t an easy game. The rain was very strong and our opponent made good attacks, but we could control ourselves and win in the end. It was a excellent result.” Goalkeeper Julio Vargas also said: “I had work today. Much work. The wet ball was very difficult to hold, and I’m happy to do my job well.”

The coach Franz Braddock commented with some reporters after the good game: “The players played well today. It rained and I know that it’s difficult to play in these conditions, as I was a player years ago. Now, as a coach, it’s different, as I’m not wet and my job was the same. I knew that the opponent was difficult but I knew that we could win, as the team is playing wonderful games and training hard to get a place in the World Cup, now very possible.”

http://img.terra.com.br/i/2006/11/01/416002-3764-ga.jpg
Liptings after suffering the goal in the 5th minute

CAFUNDÉU 1x0 THE LOWLAND CLANS

Place: Obelisco Monumental, in Lasft.
Attendance: 101,826 people.
Referee: Haroldo Penetra.
Man of the Match: Julio Vargas(Cafundéu).

http://spaam.mrdrake.net/flags/cafundeu.png CAFUNDÉU: Vargas, Vandick(Fuchs), Kirs, Becão and Wanturiso; Anormal, Priotto(Ernesto Ijak), Brahma and Kliek(Manuel Padaria); Heitor and Ganz Ijak.
Coach: Franz Braddock.

http://spaam.mrdrake.net/flags/the_lowland_clans.png THE LOWLAND CLANS: Liptings, Delvin, Mackingley, Jurgensen and Doninho(Mekij); Joeira(Menheim), Doig, McGinney and Djukashenki; Jopolik and Toldo(Innisworth).
Coach: Casey Dellet.

Ratings:
10- Vargas
8- Kirs, Becão, Wantuirso, Anormal, Liptings, Delving and McGinney
7- Vandick, Priotto, Brahma, Heitor, Mackingley, Menheim, Doig and Djukashenki
6- Manuel Padaria, Fuchs, Ganz Ijak, Jurgensen, Doninho, Mekij, Jopolik and Innisworth
5- Ernesto Ijak, Kliek and Toldo
4- Joeira

GOAL: CAFUNDÉU: Heitor 5’.

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Cafundéu – next game’s formation: Vargas, Vandick, Kirs, Becão and Sávio Ferrari; Anormal, Priotto, Mercegues and Brahma; Heitor and Ganz Ijak.
Style of +2

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Goalscorers after 7 games:
5- Ganz Ijak
3- Heitor
2- Anormal
1- Kirs, Brahma and Becão

The Bush Bugle
Bees Attempt To Qualify.


The Bushes Been Quaked Bees have been attempting to qualify for the World Cup recently. Here are their game results.

MD4: The Bees played in Race Track and defeated them 2-1. Ditmar scored both of the goals.

MD5: The Bees played a tough match against Vilita, 3-1 was the final score. Ditmar scored the only goal.

MD6: The Bees got their buts handed to them by Anastasiania, 3-0.

MD7: The Bees took on Quakmybush, a team that has a name that sounds like ours and lost 3-0.

MD8: The Bees took out Dance 2 Revolution and came out on the wrong end of a 2-0 game.

MD9: The Bees took on that nation you just can't say, Alexandrian Ptolemais and won 3-1. Ditmar scored all 3 goals.

So, after 7 games the Bees are 3-0-4. With 7 goals scored and 13 conceeded. All 7 goals have been scored by Ditmar. The Bees still have 9 more games left and they hope to climb up the table.

QAZOXIAN TIMES

4-0-4 isn't great but it still leaves Qazox with a chance as they sit 6 points out of a qualifing spot. Wins in 3 of the last 4 games have brought some hope back, but with a tough 2nd half schedule, it will be tough to qualify.

The Black Oxen didn't look particularly sharp, but their experience carried them to the win. Stefany Heisel opened the scoring in the 40th minute. Sonja Clay added a goal int he 63rd to make it 2-0, but a goal in the 75th by Stromboland tightened it back up at 2-1. But Qazox controlled the ball for the remaining 15 minutes to escape with the win.

Qazox has the next week off from qualifing, and Head Coach Reggie Hassok might be well spent using that time to prepare for matches at Ariddia and Schiavonia. The next match is against The Mushroom Kingship, whom Qazox beat 5-1 to open qualifing, a score which will probably be about the same this time around.

Game Summary:
Goals:
Qazox: Heisel (7) 40'; Clay (4) 63'
Stromboland: Unknown- 75'
Cards:
Qazox: None
Stromboland: Unknown #2 (yellow- 25')

First Vilita, Now the Cutoff

It was a gloomy day for the passengers of that flight back from Bedistan, when they realized that all the Vilitan's had dissapeared. But the shock that greeted these passengers on that day was nothing to compare with the shock that the entire NationStates world had to endure today.

Thats right, the most horrible of horrible things happened. No, it was not entire matches being left of the fixture list, nor did it have to do with inconceivably bright and non-uniform colors in official match printouts. This was a far worse horror.

There was no Matchday Cutoff.

How! How! How are the people of the world supposed to know when Matchday 10 ended? Will we forever be stuck in a timewarp? Will Matchday's 9 through 11 start bouncing off each other like an extra-terrestrial pinball game? Will the reports be blended together like almost-rotted fruit being turned into a last-ditch smoothie to feed your little brother?

It is clear that, after this horror, the world will never be the same. And, although no one knows where all the Vilitans are, one can be certain that they too are concerned about the shocking events that took place today in... or rather, the events which never occurred.

“Fans of Assegai Developments football, a good evening to you, wherever you may be. This is Mikaela Eyre reporting live from Cathedral Park, in the heart of Leá Monde, where tonight, the Riskbreakers of Assegai battled tooth and nail with the No. 14-ranked team in the world, Schiavonia. Despite a very gutsy performance by Assegai, Schiavonia demonstrated their pedigree as a footballing power with a 2-0 victory.

“Honestly, if you look around at the supporters of Assegai, they are leaving with a bittersweet feeling, since despite the loss, their team put up a fight worthy of a team of the level of Schiavonia.”

As Mikaela says this, a couple of Assegai fans walk by in the background, proudly pounding their chests and waving their Assegai Developments scarves.

“Buoyed by their supporters, Assegai kicked off with a fierce determination against Schiavonia. Early on, Assegai establish control of the field, with team captain Ashley Riot and fellow midfielders Alys Spicer and Agatha Denys filtering passes to Assegai’s front line of Severus Snape, Sidney Losstarot and Samantha Neesa. However, Schiavonia’s defense diffused every attack with timely defensive maneuvers, frustrating the Assegai forwards.

“Then, near the end of the first half, Schiavonia midfielder Alan Tiss managed to knock forward a pass to forward Arran Di Chula, who got past Assegai’s defense and sent a blistering shot past goalie Edward van de Beauchamp and into the back of the net for the 1-0 lead.

“The goal, which came on a lightning-quick counterattack, dampened the spirits of the home crowd, which was left in a stupor during the halftime break.

“However, in the second half, Assegai continued attacking, with Schiavonia turning away attack after attack after attack. With some of his players growing weary, Assegai manager Sir Knight Edgard Zúniga subbed in forward Stephen de Cobham in place of Losstarot and Duane Grissom in place of Denys.

“Nevertheless, things remained the same, with Assegai keeping Schiavonia on their heels, but with no results. Then, as the game was winding down, Schiavonia began to establish their dominance on the field, and after a series of attacks, Di Chula managed to beat Assegai defender Barnard Mallowburne in a one-on-one and curved a wicked shot around the flailing arms of van de Beauchamp.

“The game ended with Assegai fighting to keep Schiavonia from padding the score further, and at the final whistle, players exchanged handshakes and jerseys.”

Mikaela turned to her left, where Grissom, a handsome 18-year-old, stood by in his Assegai warm-ups.

“Duane, the team has now lost three of their last four games. Has a pall come over the team?” asked Mikaela.

“Uhhh… well, no… not really,” said Grissom, rubbing his fingers through his short brown hair. “I mean, we weren’t exactly expected to defeat any of the teams ranked higher than us, but we’ve been putting up good results against them. And, against the other teams…hey, nothing is every guaranteed. But, I can say that everything we have, we’ve worked hard for it.”

“Did you ever image that at the halfway point of qualifying for World Cup XXXII, Assegai would not only have a decent record, but still technically have a shot at qualifying?” she asked him.

“Heh…of course not, Mikaela,” responded Grissom, chuckling. “We’ve been labeled overachievers by the pundits of NationStates football…and we hope to keep raising eyebrows…maybe win a few more games before we take our final bow.”

“What was it like facing Schiavonia tonight?” she asked.

“Geez…Talk about running the gauntlet,” he said in a serious tone. “The last four games have been brutal. I still think we should have beaten Qazox. Ariddia is just too good. We fought hard for that draw with Wentland. And tonight…well…they just beat us. What else can I say? They’re one of the best teams in the world; we’re just a minnow to them. But, you know what? We have a lot of respect for them and we were honored to have played them so hard.”

“Your next qualifying game has Assegai paying a visit to Lisburn Mateys. Any predictions?” she asked.

“Oh…we always go out there to win—you know that,” he responded. “We’re confident that we can defeat Lisburn Mateys, but we’d be content to bring back a point. Mateys are a very proud squad and I’m sure they’re going to want retribution after we played them to a 1-1 draw.”

Mikaela nods.

“Well, Duane, thanks for your time,” she said patting his back. “Fans, we thank you for spending a few minutes with us tonight. This is Mikaela Eyre, reporting live from Cathedral Park. Have a great night!”

Game Summary

http://spaam.mrdrake.net/flags/assegai_developments.png Assegai Developments 0
http://spaam.mrdrake.net/flags/schiavonia.png Schiavonia 2

[AD]
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[SCH]
Arran Di Chula (44’, 86’)

THE FIVE STEPS TO VICTORY

NSWC Match 8

Spaamanian Plijous - 2 - V - 5 - Fort Europe

Report by Amy Bystander, Commonwealth News.

If Fort Europe were in a strong position after last weeks game, the position they lie in now is vastly improved. After todays results Fort Europe are now only one point behind the team above them, three points off the group's top team and a bookmaker in Fort Lakaria in Fort Europe has tipped the fly boys with eight to one odds of finishing top themselves, completely defying the competition organisers who seeded Fort Europe at number one hundred and thirty two. Fort Europe turned up at the stadium of Spaamanian Plijous in high spirits, spending extra time to sign autographs for the suporters of both sides. On the pitch the performed as well as they have done in all of their games so far, putting holes in the Spaamanian Plijous defence left, right and centre. Karl Isaak opened the scoring on just five minutes with a freekick struck low and hard into the far corner beyond the keeper's reach. Starlet Michelle Bishop collected a hatrick and the Player of the Match award, while the forth goal of the game was scrambled into the back of the net with substitute Joey Blanchard getting the final touch to put the game beyond the reach of their hosts. The game wasn't without upset though, an injury to young defender Floe Peltsten will see her sidelined for at least three weeks, and the home side were able to take advantage of Fort Europe's attacking play with two goals on the counter attack leaving keeper James West disapointed not to have kept another clean sheet.

"Fort Europe are performing far beyond even my expectations in this tournement, they are just so ethusiastic and love the sport they play, why can't more nations put this amount of effort into their games? It would cirtainly make the competition a lot more interesting to watch." Said my guest commentator for this game, Elves Security Force's starlet Kyla Night, while her own team enjoyed their week off from the competition. ESF also lie third in thier respective group with a good chance of qualifying for the next round. Fort Europe's next match will be the mid tournement friendly against rival team Assegai Developments, who have struggeled so far in the competition, the match to be played at Fort Europe's Commonwealth Stadium is expected to attract a sell out croud despite being only an exhibition match due to the friendly relationship of the two nations over the past few years.

PLAYER RATINGS
(Out of 10)

7 - James West
7 - Floe Peltsten (Inj 44)
8 - Tim Forrester (C)
8 - Aki Haddon
8 - Gemma Lloyd
8 - Katherine Keller
9 - Ryan Holmes
8 - Vicky Princess
9 - Mia Nevola
9 - Karl Isaak (5)
10 - Michelle Bishop (28,51,89)

SUBS

- - Tom Reas
- - Laura Harris
8 - Murphy Lee (On for Peltsten (44))
- - Will Jones
9 - Josephine Blanchard (On for Isaak (58)) (72)

Cuation Catch Up

Tynelia [0-1] Cuation

This was an away performance that would make any manager proud, tight at the back, hard in the challenge, working hard whenever we didn't have the ball. It was not a classic that will be remembered but to come to Tynelia and show such defending is a triumph for the team.

Tynelia know this is a wasted opportunity in a tight group, the worst bit of an otherwise capable performance was that Tynelia only had a dangerous effort in the last seconds of the game, Jakes getting a glancing header onto Vhalis's cross but the header lacked power, Jude able to pluck it out of the air without too much trouble.

Cuation didn't create much, Tynelia's strong defence nullified most counter attacks but playing with a three man defence is always a risk if the holding players fail to get back. A Lewish run was covered by Vhalis, his cross field ball found Downing unmarked, Anderson had gone to cover Lu Fei's run. The shot from the edge of the area was poor but Gordman was deceived by the bounce at the last second.

Tynelia pushed forward after that 70th minute opener but could not find their way past a back line brilliantly marshalled by Irwin, the captain of the team. With Rual taken off for Scott, the home side's task got even harder. It was Cuation’s first clean sheet since the pre season friendly and a welcome boost too the confidence of the team.

Cuation [2-0] The Gold TyGrr

Professional but far from inspiring, Cuation kept a second consecutive clean sheet and kept up the challenge for third place. The Gold TyGrr never created anything and had their keeper to thank for preventing a heavy defeat as they struggle to get off the bottom.

Cuation had unleashed a few long range efforts to test the keeper but on finding that he wouldn't easily be beaten, Cuation played the ball around, waiting for an opening. In the 5th minute, Fallen spotted it and with a delightful through ball, sent Rual racing clear. The striker did not disappoint, sliding the ball beyond the keeper.

Fallen, Lewish, Lu Fei, Rual and Downing all had efforts saved by the keeper in the first half as The Gold TyGrr was run ragged. Had they gone in at halt time at 1-0, the game may have been different but in injury time, Lewish was fouled on the edge of the box. Fallen stepped up and curled the ball around the wall and into the net.

At half time, Keane, Speedy and Terry came on but the game was already over, The Gold TyGrr putting every man behind the ball to prevent any further damage, aided by some poor finishing, they managed to get through the second half without conceding a third.

Dear Diary,

Last week’s night game at Frosty Hollow against Commerce Heights JSY was eerily beautiful and frightening. Nearby bushfires had blanketed the field in smoke as thick as fog. From the top of the stands it was difficult at times to see the players even with the shining array of lights.

A sudden change in wind direction just after the game started meant that everybody’s worst fears were realised. The fires soon encircled the ground. From the coaching benches at pitch level a surreal scene met the eyes. The smoke became suffused with a red colour except where the lighting shone through yellow. Frosty Hollow is dug into the ground with the roofs of the stands just one metre above the ground outside. Spectators found themselves surrounded by a glowing red and yellow fog, now brightening here, now there. The silhouettes of firefighters could be seen at roof level; many spectators clambering up to help them. From time to time the giant trees of the forest became visible as their crowns exploded into light.

Great flaming masses of embers continually fell into the Hollow, now more appropriately named Flaming Hollow. Spectators, officials and even players quickly raced to where they fell to stamp them out. In the 33rd minute, one meteor of embers fell onto the Errinundrian goal and completely burnt the netting.

Miraculously the stadium didn’t burn; the concrete and steel construction refusing to ignite. That it had been built into the ground must have also contributed. Miraculously also, no-one was killed although hundreds suffered from smoke inhalation and hundreds more were badly burned fighting the flames from the roof even though they wore no protective clothing.

Somehow the game continued through this mayhem even if, it must be said, the players were tentative and, for some reason, distracted. The final score was 1-all. cunégonde scored in the 64th minute for the potoroos and the CHJSYs scored in the 76th. That both goals were scored so late in the game confirms the nervous state of the players.

cunégonde is classicly Zu-Vendi. Her feet are long, angular and finely chiselled. Elegant is the word, even if they are long. I guess it’s a matter of proportion. Hey, she’s a fair dinkum long-footed potoroo.

Anyway, I get to paste another one into my diary.

http://i55.photobucket.com/albums/g136/regnans/East%20Gippsland/cungonde.jpg

She claims to be descended from the old royal family of Milosis. All Zu-Vendi are wankers like that. If you want to know the real truth she was a high school dropout and worked as a kitchen-hand, a “plongeur”, before being picked up by Monkeytop United.

Anyway, back to the fire. Nobody was able to leave the ground for 36 hours as the fire raged all around. The 45,000 trapped fans became a cause celebre throughout Errinundera with community screens showing up-to-the minute reports from the ground courtesy of the camera crews there to film the football.

Eventually the fire front passed by and the embers died down sufficiently for the fans to leave. In every direction the forest had been reduced to towering black columns in a desert of ash. It was then that they discovered how lucky they were. 73 people from numerous forest villages on the plateau had perished in the fire as it raged through. Fortunately, it missed the tree city of Rooty Break. One shudders to think what may have happened there.

Next week Errinundera is playing a friendly against Spaam at the Downfall Stadium to commemorate 100 years since the two teams played the final of World Cup 7.

Yours sincerely,

mckennap
Guy who looks after the most important part of the potoroos – their feet.

Trivia: cunégonde is named after a character from Voltaire’s Candide.

<inside the Tynelian locker room after the Seckland match. Coach Adam Billington comes into the laughing happy room with a scowl on his face which silences the laugheter after a few moments. Pacing around his confused team Billington finally starts talking>

“OK who the hell swapped my team up with Bettia this match? Six goals? That’s half a tourney’s worth for the real Tynelian squad. Who are you guys?” he says breaking into a wide grin as the team starts laughing.

“Game ball goes to MacDougal, first hattrick in his career. Not you Duncan, your brother outscored you by two..” Billington adds as younger brother Duncan MacDougal tries to cut off Connor to take the game ball.

“Thanks Coach.” Connor replied tossing a lazy swing at his brother.

“That’s the first one we’ve had in ages. Who got the last one, it was you wasn;t it Old Man?” Billington asks a lounging Jay Masterson.

“Yeah did it a couple of times, Older man.” Masterson retorted to his old teammate now coach.

“That’s it Masterson, you’re not starting next match, I’ll tolerate no insubordination on my watch.” Billington retorted in mock anger.

“Oh no not that coach!” Masterson says cowering with equal mock fearfulness. “Please don’t wait until minute 80 to put me in, I’ll be good promise.”

<rest of the team laughs>

“OK lets be serious for a second, great game 6-1 over Seckland. Mia, Bill nice goals on your part too. But let’s not get too excited here, this was the bottom team of the group. What we have to do is keep this up against the Gold Tygrr and get our points there. This is going to help us out on goal differential but Yafor 2 and Cuation both won too so we’re just holding in place.” Billington said settling the team down as he went into lecture mode.

“Look at the first half, we were perfect from the 6th through 9th spot which is what we need to do. But look at our scores against the other four. 0-2-2. Two points in four matches. That isn’t going to cut it people. Cuation took care of things on their end against every squad below them and nabbed a draw with Jerusalem too. We need to match that in the second half of this or we’re all going home again to the Cup of Harmony. I want three wins in the rematches and yes that means I expect you to knock off either Bettia or Jerusalem when they come here. We’re not protecting our turf at all. A draw with Yafor 2 and a loss to Cuatiuon at home. What’s going to happen when we go to their stadiums? Are you guys going to let Bettia get a fifth win in 6 matches with us? 3-1, we lost to them by that score when I was still playing. I know we’ve gotten better since then people. And don’t think Jerusalem is going to sit back and accept that we stole a point off them on their turf either. They’re going to be looking for points themselves don’t forget. Sure it’ll be tough but I don’t know about you people but I’m sick of finishing just out of the World Cup.”

“Hell think of poor Jay, do you really want him to be dragging his broken down old carcass out onto the field again at 46 or 50? Hell his grandkids might get to play with him if we keep up this run of good but not that good we’ve been on. We’ll have a bit of a break soon and I want everyone in this room to think about what it would mean to be the first Tynelian team ever to qualify for the Wolrd Cup. No matter what else happened in your life no one would ever be able to take that from you. But its not going to be handed over, nope you’re all going to have to scratch and claw for every point, for every goal. Draws won’t help us at this point. Goals and wins, that’s the only way left for us. Now everyone shower up and relax, we got Gold Tygrr coming here then its off to Yafor 2. Great game today, this is going to be the start of a great second half won’t it people?”

“You know it Coach!”

“Right on coach!”

“Yeah we don’t want Masterson out on the pitch in a walker!”

“Don’t make me go over there Jakes.”

“Careful Old Man you might OOF!”

<Bill Jakes is silenced by an expertly thrown balled up towel thrown by Masterson that catches him squarely in the face>


MEANWHILE

“So Melodi, you think you’ve done it? Have you solved the Milchama code?”

“Yes Doctor Riley, I think I have. I’ve started double checking the numbers and am now entering into the computer to confirm things.”

“Who would have thought that Harmonie Harris’ sister…”

“Masterson she’s married remember? And yes I get that all the time, comes with having an airhead for a sister.”

“So do you have it?”

“We shall see, yes I think. OK its up on the computer now its…”

<Power failure across the city wiping out the relevant data from the copmuter screen as it goes dead>

I'd never been out of the country before. Sure I'd been to some qualifiers around Az-cz, and of course to tons of Yak Clerics games, both home and away, but my owner finally brought me with on a trip out of the country.

Usually I get left at home. See we drums are expensive and difficult to transport so it's usually not worth the hassle to try to load me up and get me to some foreign country. Maybe Bazalonia would be possible as it's just a short boat ride or Nedalia. But other than that it's very unlikely. But this was a very special match.

We were traveling to play Liverpool England for the top spot in the group. Liverpool England being a soccer power we knew that their were very few tickets available for the visitors. So all the fans travelling knew that they'd have to compensate by bringing noise and energy. And that they did.

As soon as they finished playing the anthems I started to get banged on and it was basically like that for the whole match. Usually my player takes some time off in short stretches, but there would be no resting this match.

The energy was solid and steady for the first 25 minutes with both teams feeling each other out, but when we broke the tie in the 28th minute on a Stanleyinho goal the drumming went from steady to crazed. To have taken the lead against Liverpool England in Liverpool England was something. I honestly thought my owner was going to crack my head open. Thankfully he didn't as it would've put me out of service for the rest of the match, and really it's not a pleasant experience.

The pounding returned to the solid pace but when Pizelkaxrovsky curled home a free kick to give us a 2-0 the drumming became really excited. The whole Az-cz section was buzzing and the drums and trumpets and other instruments were absolutely jamming. The whole section had an incredible energy. This was in stark contrast to the dead silence coming from the Liverpool England sections of the crowd.

When we took a 2-0 lead into half my owner did something I'd never experienced before. He played through halftime. Usually he takes a break at the half, but he must have gotten carried away with the emotion as the whole Az-cz fan section stayed at half time to sing and dance and play and enjoy their lead.

Amazingly the Gnomes extended there lead Kn-Dg connected with Pizelkaxrovsky on a corner as the star found his second goal and gave the Gnomes an amazing three goal lead.

Liverpool England really got offensive to try to make up the goals and it looked for a little bit like it might work when DAMION pulled a goal back for Liverpool England. However one of the Az-cz rally chants was immediately started and the Gnomes quickly struck back with Pizelkaxrovsky finishing off his hat trick and really killing the spirit of the hosts.

The Gnomes finished out the game safely and took a massively impressive victory with them. The fans stayed in the stadium for quite a while after the match and partied around the streets of both Liverpool England and Az-cz for quite a while after the match. As for me I'm looking forward to some rest. I really took a beating today. Although neither of my heads broke I still hope they get changed before my next match.

Amda-Mo: Incredible. What a victory for the Robbers going into the break, winning 4-1 over Liverpool England in Liverpool England.

Lur-Mn: If there was any doubt about the Gnomes before this match there can't be any now. While some of the other suprise qualifiers are struggling and some are in qualifying positions but on the edge, we've rocketed to the top of our group.

Amda-Mo: How did the Gnomes put together such a dominating performance?

Lur-Mn: How else? Pizelkaxrovsky was just brilliant. 3 goals and an assist against a team of that calibre is amazing. He scored more goals by himself than Livepool Englands other 7 opponents did combined. Just incredible.

Amda-Mo: We hit two goals at set pieces. What was the key to that?

Lur-Mn: Clearly they'd been working on them in practice. Pizelkaxrovsky does have magnificent ball control and he really utilized it today.

Amda-Mo: While clearly the offense was impressive with four goals, there has to be a lot of credit given to the defense in only allowing one. How do you think they did it?

Lur-Mn: The back four controlled their lines. Liverpool got a number of good attacks past the midfield but the back four, especially Ns-Ta were very good today. DAMION did break through once, but against a team that had been averaging more than four goals a game, and with the way the offense was clicking that's hardly disappointing.

Amda-Mo: Do you think it's ok for the team to start looking towards the cup proper?

Lur-Mn: Of course not. It would take a collapse at this point not to qualify, but until you've done it it's best not to get ahead of yourself. With the way we've played the first half everybody's going to be giving us there best. And Qutar and Liverpool England are definitely going to want revenge. In their eyes we're still an upstart nation. So we have to keep our focus.

Amda-Mo: Analyze the schedule for us for the second half.

Lur-Mn: Well it breaks down well for us. We've got all of the teams 2nd through 5th coming to Az-cz. The fact that we did as well as we did with little benefit from home matches is just amazing. It's just an absolutely awesome performance. We're currently third in the overall standings, behind only Bedistan and Oliverry, who were both perfect the first half of play.

Amda-Mo: Coming up we should have a friendly with Vilita. Your thoughts on the match.

Lur-Mn: Well we might well come out sluggish for the match after the focus and dedication we've shown in qualifying. But they are travelling out here to Slimes Stadium so that'll help. I can't imagine either team pressing too hard and a number of the regulars will be missing. But there is definitely pride on the line so it should be a good game. 2-2 Draw will be my prediction.

Amda-Mo: There will be no awards tonight as everyone on the team has been great. Hats off to the entire squad.

CAFUNDÉU LOSES THE GAME AGAINST BACKWARDISTAN

http://img.terra.com.br/i/2005/11/08/277157-8957-it.jpg
Backwardistan player commemorates the goal

It wasn’t a good result for Cafundéu, of course. But it wasn’t a disaster. The team didn’t play well, maybe because of the pressure made by the supporters of Backwardistan. The team suffered one goal in the first half and another goal at the second half, and couldn’t score, thanks to the opponent goalkeeper that made an excellent game saving most of Cafundéu’s shots. Some players even played well, but most of them didn’t have the expected performance.

But this result doesn’t change nothing in the table. If Cafundéu wins, it could finish the first part of the group stage in the second position, but the loss made them stay at the third position, with the same difference of points that Cafundéu had in the last round. Two points behind The Lowland Clans and five points in front of Spaam. Now the team will play a friendly game against Ariddia and then will return to play in the competition against The Mice of Miceland at home. If Cafundéu wins this game, it can retrieve the confidence.

THE GAME
Cafundéu started the game attacking as usual. Backwardistan started the game holding the ball in the middle of the field, trying to find the best time to attack. The beginning of the game showed a better Cafundéu having the best goal chances, while Backwardistan couldn’t find spaces in the attack. 3rd minute: Priotto received the ball in the midfield and passed to Brahma. The attacking midfielder dribbled a defender and shot to the goal, but the goalkeeper was able to make his first save in the game.

6th minute: Another chance for Cafundéu. This time, Mercegues received the ball from Anormal in the right side of the field and passed to Heitor who was waiting the ball inside the area. He shot, but sent the ball over the bar. After eight minutes of the first half, Backwardistan’s tactic was working, as they were starting to find breaches in the opponent’s defense. They started to attack and found good chances to score, while Cafundéu didn’t defend more. 8th minute: Yellow card to a Backwardistan defender.

10th minute: First goal chance of Backwardistan. An attacker invaded the area, dribbled a defender and shot to the goal. Vargas made a good save. 12th minute: Ray Kirs started a fast counterattack for Cafundéu. Brahma received the ball and passed to Ganz Ijak, who dribbled a defender and shot to the goal, but sent the ball wide. 16th minute: Backwardistan attacked again with the same attacker. This time, he reached the entrance of the area and shot. The ball went over the bar, but near the goal.

20th minute: Vandick made a good play running from the right side of the field and passing to Anormal, who ran over an opponent and crossed to the area. Ganz Ijak headed, but the goalkeeper saved and sent it for a corner. Mercegues took the corner kick, Becão headed, but this time the ball went over the bar. 23rd minute: Mercegues lost the ball and the home team started a fast counterattack. An attacking midfielder got the ball and shot from outside the area, but he missed the goal.

25th minute: Sávio Ferrari tackled an attacker and pass the ball to Priotto. The defensive midfielder pass the ball to Brahma, who passes the ball back to the number 6 of Cafundéu. Priotto controlled the ball and shot from outside the area with all his strength. The ball hit the bar and returned to the area, but a defender was able to head it to outside the area. 28th minute: Fast attack by Backwardistan using the right wing. The winger made a good play and crossed the ball to the area. An attacker headed, but Vargas got the ball easily.

http://us.news1.yimg.com/us.yimg.com/i/fifa/gen/fifa/20040422/i/3732883748.jpg
Brahma didn't have a good game

30th minute: Ray Kirs received the ball in the midfield and sent it to the attack. Heitor got it, dribbled a defender and passed to Ganz Ijak, who shot. A defender hit the ball before it reached the smallest area. 32nd minute: Priotto lost the ball in the midfield and the opponent started to run. He dribbled a defender and then passed to an attacker, who invaded the area and shot, scoring the first goal of the game. Cafundéu became very nervous after suffering the goal and started to foul the opponents. Braddock became nervous too.

35th minute: Becão was fouled by a Backwardistan player, the same one that received a card in the eighth minute. This time he received the red card. Another player of the home team complained with the referee and received the yellow card too. Vandick took the free kick and passed to Anormal, who dribbled a midfielder and tried to score shooting from outside the area, but he missed. 39th minute: Good chance for the home team. An attacker invaded the area and passed to his team mate, but he made a bad shot and missed the goal.

41st minute: A midfielder of Backwardistan attacked after a good play made by a defender. He reached the entrance of the area and passed to an attacker, who shot but missed the goal. 44th minute: Priotto was disputing the ball in the midfield. He punched the opponent, the referee saw it and he received the red card. Injury time: Heitor received the ball in the entrance of the area and shot to the goal, but he sent the ball over the bar. The first half ended 1x0.

For the second half, Franz Braddock put Ernesto Ijak in Heitor’s place. Bacwardistan returned with the same formation. 3rd minute: The home team started a counterattack. The ball was crossed to the area. Vargas and one of the attackers jumped to get the ball. They crashed and both fell on the ground. They didn’t seem injured, but the coaches thought that it would be better if both were subbed to make exams. Durepox entered in Vargas’ place. 5th minute: Anormal fouled a midfielder and received the yellow card.

6th minute: Ray Kirs made a good play coming from the left side of the defense and passed to Brahma. The midfielder dribbled an opponent and crossed to the area, where Ernesto Ijak headed to Ganz Ijak, who headed to the goal, but the goalkeeper made a very good save. 9th minute: Bacwardistan attacked with a defensive midfielder, who received the ball and passed to a winger. He passed to an attacker, who didn’t find space to invade the area, as Sávio Ferrari was marking him. He tried to dribble the defender but lost the ball.

12th minute: Mercegues received the ball from Anormal and ran to the attack. He held the ball for some moments before passing to Brahma, who crossed it to the area. Becão headed it, but a defender intercepted the ball and sent it to the attack. An attacking midfielder took it and shot from outside the area, but Durepox made a very good save. Anormal wasn’t playing very well, so Braddock put Manuel Padaria in his place. Backwardistan made a change at the same moment too.

http://www.planetworldcup.com/CUPS/1994/wc94_007.jpg
The goalkeepers had work in this game

16th minute: Manuel Padaria got the ball from Sávio Ferrari in his first play in the match. He passed to Ernesto Ijak, but the attacker tried to dribble too many players and lost the ball. It was clear that Cafundéu was too nervous and that Backwardistan was very calm and creating only good goal chances. 20th minute: Counterattack for Backwardistan. An attacker received the ball, invaded the area and shot. Durepox hit the ball with his left hand and it hit the post before leaving the playing field.

23rd minute: Ganz Ijak took the ball in the midfield after a defender made a mistake. He couldn’t invade the well guarded area, so he passed to Brahma who shot from outside the area. The goalkeeper saved but gave the rebound, that Ganz Ijak got. He shot, but was blocked by a defender who sent it for a corner. Mercegues took the corner but Becão wasted the chance. 27th minute: Manuel Padaria lost the ball and the opponent attacked. He tried to score shooting from outside the area, but missed the goal sending the ball wide.

30th minute: Brahma is fouled and the defender received a yellow card. Vandick took the free kick, but the opponent goalkeeper made a very good save, holding the ball safely. 33rd minute: A winger of the home team ran through the right side of the field. He reaches the attack and crosses to the area. Durepox punches the ball, but another attacker get the rebound and shots to the goal. Durepox made another good save, but gave the rebound to a third attacker, who shot but sent the ball over the bar.

37th minute: Ray Kirs passes the ball to Mercegues. The midfielder saw Brahma in offside position, so he had to pass to Ernesto Ijak. The attacker receives the ball and tries to score shooting from outside the area, but misses the goal. 40th minute: Free kick to Backwardistan. A midfielder cross the ball to the area. Becão and Sávio Ferrari jump but miss the ball, and the opponent attackers miss it too. Durepox can’t get the ball and it enters the goal. The second goal of Backwardistan.

44th minute: Mercegues receives the ball and tries to score shooting from outside the area. The ball hit a defender and went over the bar. Brahma took the corner but nobody hits the ball to try to score. The referee ends the game, and Cafundéu’s players left the game sad. But then the stadium announces the other games’ results: Oliverry defeated Spaam, and they smiled, although they were still disappointed by the loss. A friendly can make they play better again.

Goalkeeper Durepox said to the media: “Yes, we lost. We can’t think that we would win all the games after the loss against Oliverry. We knew that we would lose a game sometime, and today we lost. But let’s try to go back to the path of victories.” Midfielder Mercegues also said: “It wasn’t a good performance. Backwardistan played really better and I can’t understand why we played so badly. I have to say that we deserved to lose, and all that we can do now is to play better the next games.”

Defender Sávio Ferrari said few words: “Losses are part of football, as victories are. So of course we’ll return to win.” The coach Franz Braddock talked with the media too, saying: “Today we lost, but we’re still in the third position, with good chances to qualify to the World Cup. So, we’re still strong. I would even say that if we win half of the games that we have to play we can qualify, but I’m not sure of this. Defeating The Mice of Miceland at home would be a excellent start.”

http://www.planetworldcup.com/CUPS/1994/wc94_017.jpg
Backwardistan commemorated the victory

BACKWARDISTAN 2x0 CAFUNDÉU

Place: unknown stadium, in Backwardistan.
Attendance: unknown.
Referee: Zaqueu Garbarosso.
Man of the Match: The goalkeeper(Backwardistan).

http://spaam.mrdrake.net/flags/backwardistan.png BACKWARDISTAN: no team released.

http://spaam.mrdrake.net/flags/cafundeu.png CAFUNDÉU: Vargas(Durepox), Vandick, Kirs, Becão and Sávio Ferrari; Anormal(Manuel Padaria), Priotto, Mercegues and Brahma; Heitor(Ernesto Ijak) and Ganz Ijak.
Coach: Franz Braddock.

Ratings:
7- Vargas, Durepox, Becão, Vandick, Kirs and Mercegues.
6- Manuel Padaria, Brahma and Ganz Ijak.
5- Sávio Ferrari, Anormal and Heitor.
4- Ernesto Ijak and Priotto.

GOALS: BACKWARDISTAN: An attacker 32’ , A midfielder 85’.

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Cafundéu – friendly’s formation: Durepox, Fuchs, Kirs, Becão and Wantuirso; Anormal, Manuel Padaria, Priotto and Kliek; Heitor and Ganz Ijak.
Style of +2

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Goalscorers after 8 games:
5- Ganz Ijak
3- Heitor
2- Anormal
1- Kirs, Brahma and Becão

"We're not Bedistan we're Lisburn Mateys, we're not Bedistan we're Lisburn Mateys, we're not Bedistan we're Lisburn Mateys but it's all the same to me!!!!"

"What the bloody hell are they singing, Dave?"

"Beats me, boss. These Mateys are a bit bonkers."

"Well, we'll show them something...COME ON SAVAGE YOU'RE NOT WITH THE MISSUS NOW!!! TEK 'IM AT THE 'IP!!!"

"Look at them, boss. They're a bit nervous."

"Yeah, there's been rumours about their manager...GET STUCK IN LAWRENCE!!!...they had a bad start..."

"Jeez, boss, don't these guys ever shut up? You can 'ardly 'ear yerself think..."

"TRY ONE!!!! Ohh...bad luck...GET UP THERE, BASSETT!!!!"

"Nipper's curling it in...YEEESS!!!!"

"OHHH KEITH BASSETT YOU F***ING BEAUTY!!!!"

***

Norman Hacker, manager of Wentland, is facing yet another international suspension following a controversial incident at the National Stadium at the Maze in Lisburn.

After Keith Bassett's header gave Wentland the lead, Hacker was seen jumping out of the dug-out and yelling obscenities at the crowd, before suggesting that he would "take them all on".

Expert lip-readers have indicated that the comments were along the lines of "we're Wentland not stupid Lisburn bloody Mateys, take that you buggers", which is not conducive to world peace.

The Wentland FA has apologized to the Lisburn Mateys FA for such alleged conduct and hopes that the ground will be repaired in time for their next home game.

For the record, Hacker was sent off, but as he was not safe in the stands - or indeed in Lisburn - he was sent in a hot air balloon over the pitch, from which he barked orders through a megaphone until a crossbow bolt pierced the skin of the aerostat globe. Hacker was uninjured in the ensuing chaos but was booked for descent.

The match ended in a surprise 2-1 win for Wentland, with substitute Andy Saint scoring the winner from a late corner, which puts the Swifts in a strong position coming to the turn. However many teams in the group have flattered to deceive and no-one is counting chickens, apart from Albert the chicken counter at Pullet's Poultry Farm.

The Daily Quak
Sharks Anhialate Anastasiania

The Quakmybush National Soccer Team continued their World Cup 32 qualifying run in Anastasiania. The teams came out to an excited Anastasianian crowd. In the 5th minute Marko Nyberg had a wonderful chance, however he put the ball just wide. Then, in the 14th minute, Jon Fields had a wonderful run and fired the shot top corner, 1-0 Quakmybush. The crowd went silent, that was until Nyberg had another chance, this time just grazing the post. In the 39th minute, Cory Sorley recieved a wonderful pass from Fields, he made no mistake, 2-0 Quakmybush. That was the score going onto the break. The Sharks came out extremely sloppy in the second half, there was a tonne of passes that were off, and many other simple mistakes that should not have happened. Nyberg stole the ball and came in on a break-away, lucky Cam Carroll made a spectacular save to keep it 2-0. In the 65th minute Sorley received a pass from Ben Miller, Sorley again found the back of the net, 3-0 Quakmybush. Then in the 69th minute, Anastasiania made a final attempt for the net, however Nyberg shot just wide once more. Then in the 76th minute Sorley made an unbelievable run down the left side and found the net, giving him his first career hattick and making the score 4-0, which is how the game ended. The Sharks took over sole position of their group with New Montreal States, shocking 2-1 loss against Bushes Been Quaked.

Quakmybush - 4
Fields 14' Sorley 39' 65' 76'

Anastasiania - 0
None

So ends the first half of qualifying, the Sharks are looking mighty impressive snagging 21 of 24 points in the first half, with 27 goals for, and only 6 against. The Sharks will hope to win the group and adavance to their fourth straight World Cup.

Next Up for the Sharks is an off week, then they will travel to take on Bedistan in a friendly match.

Goal Scorers
Jon Fields - 10
Cory Sorley - 8
Matthew Graves - 3
Andrew Plett - 1
Ben Miller - 1
Mike Martin - 1
Ryan Fret - 1
Clifford Baker - 1
Darrel Ralegigh - 1

Article By: Rick Juras

Hello Netizens,

yes, your weird blogger is still here despite your attempts to keep me away from my computer. No, I am not becoming paranoid, first, I was invited to watch the match in a bar in town, then the after match-celebration went on for quite a while and then I could not find an etju back home. I still am not home, but there are internet cafes in this city (comments about netaddiction will be directed to /dev/null... oh bummer, it is full). Now I am here and supposed to write something aboot the 2:2 against the former world champion. Nothing I can think of is anyhow blogworthy since it is 3 am here, but meh... Can't let y'all down, eh*?

First of all, the Squornshelous fans... I never saw a crowd more intimidated by Orange-Blue chants. Maybe it was because they mimicked commands by the Sqounshelan police, maybe because the Squornshelous fans could not believe that there is something like wealth in a nation where the Great Leader (or was it the Dear Leader? No clue about his title) does not tell its population how to wipe their own asses. Or because they are dumb. Yes, I am repeating myself about dumb Squornshelous people... but it is true! Their education budget is a whooping 0%, their military budget 46% (it's 38% and 0% for this great land of ours¹). So.. y'all ca~n make up yer mind about the type of nation: dumb and dangerous!

Next random thought: What in the green hills of fair Kalisimu is Asaikivelemanakere Ralaseletikivenemaratede thinking? Anything at all? While I understand that the hetaki was totally underrepresented in former matches, does that justify such a shabby defense? If I want risk to lose everything, I'd go to the casino! Asaikivelemanakere Ralaseletikivenemaratede should get his ass in gear to nominate some better defenders. Yes, Juru Mahele still was not nominated, neither was Viji Teke. That our Dear Seleken Leader refuses to nominate Hanja Le-Xi is not surprising, the Ly are not really liked by selekens and apparently Dear Leader Asaikivelemanakere Ralaseletikivenemaratede² can not overcome his prejudices.

I want to interrupt this ranting by one praise. If you do not want to read something like that skip to the next paragraph, don't sue me. Aia Kansu is divine! I mean, after Vetu Xeda's injury, it was really a risky decision to give him his first chance against a real opponent, but he totally impressed me. Maybe it was the alcohol, but have you seen his goal for the 2:2? Of course you have. I fully expect to be flamed for this³, but I wait to see more of him in the kanvali!

Back to ranting: Anyone realizes that this time, our Squornshelous experience was nearly as bad as when we were new in the world of soccer in unspeakably ancient times (or World cup 9 for the less poetically minded)? Only one point more than when we unrankedly met the number 25 in the world. Now this must become better!

Anyways, next etju leaves soon, So I need to go!

Happy Hackinh!

¹ unless you are foreigner, in that case, it's some different stats but still better than Squornshelous for one simple reason: ye are readinh this text in rejistanian, which means your ecudation can't be bad.
² if you wonder wether I write his full name just to make the page appear less empty, BINGO!
³ is there anything a blogger is not flamed for?

*OOC: the blog is in rejistanian but Anonymous Blogger combines the oddities of different local versions of rejistanian for stylistic effects.

Cuation Round Up

Yafor 2 [0] Cuation [1]


Cuation grabs another vital away win from their challengers with a third consecutive clean sheet. Yafor will feel they should have scored but wasted two great chances to pull level and that may just come back to haunt them as they fall six points behind.

Cuation battled hard but a defensive game means sometimes that chances will be scarce. Yafor didn't seem to want too push too many forward so Cuation struggled to get a counter attack going. Rual was left to struggle for scraps but found no luck. His partner Lu Fei was forced deep to get the ball and hold it up, he did the job well but struggled to make an impact.

The biggest danger was going to be either a set piece or an error, it was the second option that cost Yafor the game. Cole hit an early cross from just inside the Yafor half, Lu Fei met it outside the box, heading the ball towards goal. It was a good header, low, towards the corner, it even had bounce. Even so, it should have been an easy save for the Yafor keeper but his late reactions meant he couldn't get down in time. 1-0!

This 55th minute goal prompted Rual to be taken off for Scott and the formation changed to 5-4-1. Cuation battled hard and the defensive effort was impressive but Yafor twice exposed holes in the back line. Cuation failed to clear a corner and when the cross came in from the right, Cuation's backline was all over the place.

Jude had no way of cutting the cross out and was unable to do anything as Yafor's main striker, met it on the six yard box. Centre of goal, unmarked, anywhere but straight at Jude and Yafor would equalise. The flatfooted Jude could only watch in relief as the header sailed past his right post.

In injury time, Fallen fouled just outside the box and Yafor had a good opportunity, slightly left from the centre, facing a five man wall so many Yafor players were unmarked. The free kick curled around the wall and beat Jude, crashing off the cross bar and back into the six yard box.

A Yafor attacker pounced, throwing himself into a diving header while Jude was still on the floor. He got the touch needed but Irwin had seen the danger, throwing himself into a diving header and blocking the effort. The two players couldn't get the ball either in or away, Jude able to get in among them and kick the ball away to Cheese, the defender just hoofing it as far up the pitch as possible.

http://img142.imageshack.us/img142/9163/starlogo2ti.jpg
upward battle

The Lisburn Mateys today suffered a home defeat to the hands of close rivals Wentland. Mateys and Wentland are both very evenly matched teams with both of them aiming to win the game, mayby the Mateys a bit more seeing as they where at home.

The match was as even has it was predicted but Wentland scored first with a fabulous curling effort from Keith Bassett which lead to Wentland head coach Norman Hacker being sent from the ground after some obscenities he yelled at the Mateys crowd which are not fit to be published here. The best bit was that the people Hacker was yelling where some of the most powerful people in Mateys football including Sports Minister Doug O'Hanlin who was not pleased at all.

Mateys scored the second goal just to show that they where not prepared to roll over. Seamus O'Flannery got the goal with a rare heading effort from the player, but he was completly unmarked and the ball from Chuck was perfect. The left wing position is still a very tightly contested one with O'Flannery and Mc Cann both showing that they are on form and in top condition.

The game was stolen from the Mateys in the dying minutes of the game when substitute Andy Saint scored from a corner, Keith Livingston will have to take the blame for that goal as he didnt compete effectivly in the air with Saint

Mateys now face an uphill battle to qualify as the team still needs to travel to Wentland as well as Aridda

http://spaam.mrdrake.net/flags/lisburn_mateys.pngLisburn Mateys 1 - 2 Wentlandhttp://spaam.mrdrake.net/flags/wentland.png

Northern Caesarea 2 Harlesburg 1

12. Ortega ***

2. Martínez **
4. Capdevilla *
14. Molinero 0 I
18. Pastor *** A
22. Ibañez ** I

24. Novo ****
6. Begines *
8. Ríos 0 I

9. Torres ** I
20. Toledo *

Called in:

1. Cuéllar
3. Sergi
10. Solá
13. Castro
7. Urrutikoetxea
15. Javi



--------------------------------------------------------

The crack
Novo
The veteran player made one of his legendary matches from the right wing, getting the Harlesburg left back mad and making the pass which led the the victory goal.

The dandy
Ortega
He goalkept with serenity and elegance. he saved the team¡, considering our defenders awful day.

The tough guy
Pastor
Tried to compensate his bad matches with tackles and violence.

Not his day
Molinero
The usually tough defender was like a little kitten for our rival strikers.

Berenguer-The Nou Estadi saw a very boring match, with the Tricolores taking a new step in their dull WC XXXII participation. It is clear that the Joan Miguel defensive concept of the game not only drives to terrible matches, but also contributes nothing when we consider the results. So, what's the point in maintaining this pointless catenaccio? What do we get from this Bilardismo?

GRAHAM CITY SUN - World Cup Qualifying Coverage

Galaxy Close Out First Half With an Embarassing Loss

GRAHAM CITY - After completely dominating the underachieving Spaam, the Galaxy looked to cruise into their bye day with only three points between them and Oliverry, and with the potential to catch up to the Frenchmen when they travel to Madeira to play the Galaxy in the rematch of the near defeat for the Oliverrians. With Spaam a full eight points behind the Galaxy, thre greatest challenge for them was to catch up to Oliverry. That just became much harder after a disappointing and embarassing loss to first timers Canfundeu. After the game, Casey Dellet was visibly frustrated. "It's a tough loss. We simply didn't play good enough football to deserve the three points. Now we have to work extra hard and hopefully go undefeated in the second half to potentially win the group."

After the game, Captain McGinney shared the renewed determination of his manager. "We need to put ourselves to the grindstone and really get some good performances in the second half of the qualifying schedule."

Overall though, the Galaxy have played an excellent, if not outstanding first half. Despite the loss yesterday to the newcomers, the defence of the Galaxy has been outstanding, having conceded only two goals in the entirety so far, matched only by the Liverpool English and the Az-czids. The Galaxy have outplayed pretty much every team so far, even the Oliverrians in the heartbreaking one-nil loss in which the Galaxy had two goals disallowed. The midfield has produced results unlike any since the run to the semis in World Cup 12. Dominating the flow of the play, they have played a patient game waiting for good opportunities rather than making some mistakes and having a very active offence in exchange for those mistakes. The defence has been exceptionally solid, led by the pairing of Jurgensen and Mackingley. Other than this somewhat embarassing loss, the Galaxy look to qualify from the groups for the first time in a very long time.

The Crimson Blade

Assegai visits Lisburn Mateys

The Assegai Developments National Team found themselves on the road again, this time as the guest of Lisburn Mateys, whom Assegai shocked in the first week of qualifying with a thrilling 1-1 draw in Leá Monde.

In fact, the draw set the stage for Assegai to pull off three consecutive victories, but have since lost three of their last four matches.

“Well, we can’t complain, though,” explained Assegai forward Stephen de Cobham. “Almost everyone expected us to get rolled in every game. However, despite losing to quality opponents, we keep finding ourselves still battling for a victory late in almost every game, which is remarkable when you put into perspective that we’re only ranked No. 102 in the world.”

Whether you call them overachievers or opportunists, or you respect their tenacity and skill, Assegai has captivated the attention of their opponents while making a name for themselves.

Although they are not expected to qualify to NS World Cup XXXII, they’re sure making it difficult for the higher ranked teams by playing up to their level and battling them to the end.

“We learned our lesson the last time out,” team captain Ashley Riot said. “We’ll be prepared for Lisburn Mateys.”

Article by Mikaela Eyre

NOT SO FRIENDLY AFTER ALL

Friendly Match

Fort Europe - 2 - V - 0 - New Propagandia

Report by Amy Bystander, Commonwealth News.

Fort Europe found themselves at home for a friendly match against New Propagandia, a game organised at the last minute when origional opponents Assegai Developments were forced to cancil due to bad weather. Fort Europe thank New Propagandia for stepping in at short notice off the pitch, however on the pitch they gave no sign of their apreciation as they hammered their visitors from start to finish. The match was clean with no cards being issued, and two classy goals devided the teams at full time. The opener came from Karl Isaak just fifteen minutes into the game, and Mia Nevola finished off in the second half with a left foot volley from the edge of the area which clipped the underside of the bar. Fort Europe will return to the NSWC matches next week for the second half of the group stage fresh from their break and ready to push forwards for qualification and a chance to impress on a greater scale in the knockout stages which follow.

I'm quite happy being the speakers for Slimes Stadium, but I'm gonna be honest here. I much prefer it when we use the stadium to hold concerts than when we have to play football games here. And if they have to be football games Slime's -League games are good. World Cup games have a more dignified feel because their are foreigners involved. And of course "more dignified" is code for "less fun". And friendlies are the worst. Cause no one much cares. There aren't that many fans and they don't really pay attention to things anyways. Plus I always get all these unfamiliar names drifting through my system.

Tonight was such a night. The Vilitans had come to Az-cz City for a friendly match. As I was broadcasting the Az-cz starting lineups it included a bunch of players I'd never broadcast before, or at least not at the world cup level. Players like EE-Or, Hu-35, and Bu-Lv were the big names of the squad and many other young players were here. The only regular starter who took part in the match was Hmr-Pn.

After the match I broadcast the results to what was a moderately interesting 2-2 draw. The goal scorers for Az-cz were EE-Or and Ho-Lee Chung, who might end up on the next world cup squad.

Amda-Mo: We join you after tonight's 2-2 draw with Vilita.

Lur-Mn: Which I predicted correctly, I'd like to add.

Amda-Mo: Indeed, both the result and the score. Well done. Of course that's the first time you've gotten it right.

Lur-Mn: I've been pretty close. Getting exact results is difficult.

Amda-Mo: Yes it is anyways. What are your thoughts about the outcome of the match?

Lur-Mn: I thought it was a fine game. The young kids held their own against a strong squad and there proved to be some fine players waiting in the wings. Ho-Lee Chung was man of the match and deservedly so. He made a nice bid for selection for next cup, but he does play a pretty stacked position of attacking midfield, where it will be hard to see him unseating Kn-Dg or Levesque.

Amda-Mo: Any concerns about the team?

Lur-Mn: No. Considering how many uncapped players we had tonight, the result was a very good one.

Amda-Mo: So looking ahead to the next match against Qutar, what do we need to do to repeat our success against them?

Lur-Mn: The key is to provide support to Pizelkaxrovsky. Our defense has been incredibly good so far. Six shutouts and nobody's scored more than once. And that includes Liverpool England who's just been blasting goals home. So if we can keep our offense clicking than we ought to be able to find success.

Amda-Mo: Now looking ahead to the second half overall, explain to us the general overview?

Lur-Mn: Well we're in good shape. We've got some losses to play with which is nice, but we'd like to not use. A win against Qutar and we're all but qualified. It could be basically decided pretty early as we hit Qutar and Sel Appa in two of our first three matches out of the break. If we win those first three we ought to be mathematically qualified for the cup proper. But the team has to stay focused. If we lose both then we're right back with the group and vulnerable. So we'll want to come out strong. Thankfully all of the big matches will be in Az-cz, in front of our wonderful fans.

Amda-Mo: Looking at things as they stand now, who would you guess to be the three qualifiers from the group?

Lur-Mn: Clearly us and Liverpool England as we are both strong teams and well positioned at the top. And I see no reason to think anyone other than Qutar will rise up. Cataduanes did themselves a huge disservice by squandering two points against Anrow. At home none the less. Of course they're still within three points so they could fight back, but if they just miss they'll be kicking themselves.

Amda-Mo: So it sounds like the Pink & Green are well positioned. We'll see you back here soon, with hopefully good news after the Gnomes try to defend Burlock Castle from a Qutari invasion.

A GOOD FRIENDLY GAME

http://img.terra.com.br/i/2006/06/10/351339-7595-ga.jpg
Ariddia attacking and Durepox saving

Cafundéu went to Ariddia to play a friendly game before start the battle for a place in the World Cup, as the team have very good chances. They travelled a lot, and the coach Braddock made many tests, calling some players that are out of the WC squad and making 7 substitutions during the game. This way, he could do all the tests that he wanted. Ariddia also used the 5 players that play in Cafundéu’s league. Although the new season didn’t start and they still didn’t play for their new teams, the supporters appreciated their game.

Xavier Xu, who plays for Dunboor FC. Ke Sho, who plays for Atlético Jutense. Selan Mataitai, who plays for Petardos S/A. And Sébastien Lescrit and Christophe Argentier, who play for CR Submiria. All these players could show to their new teams what they can make in the next season, helping Ariddia to defeat Cafundéu with a result of 3x1. Cafundéu also played well, as it was a difficult opponent and playing away isn’t an easy job. Next game is against The Mice of Miceland, at home. If Cafundéu wins, can be more close to the WC(World Cup, don’t make any confusion, please).

THE GAME
Before the game, a terrorist of Cafundéu’s Communist Party was arrested when trying to arm a bomb inside Cafundéu’s reserved seats. He travelled to Ariddia to kill the Counselor-Minister of International Relationships Ray McKeen. Fortunately, he failed. After that, the game could start. Ariddia started the game controlling the ball more, while Cafundéu wanted to attack at all costs. 2nd minute: Senaya received the ball in the midfield and dribbled Manuel Padaria. He passed to Komu who shot, but missed the goal.

5th minute: Priotto got the ball in the midfield. He controlled it for some minutes, dribbled Hasebe and sent the ball to the area. Ganz Ijak headed it, but the goalkeeper Xavier Xu saved. 7th minute: Ariddia attacked with Charisteas. The midfielder invaded the area and passed the ball to Lescrit. He shot, but the goalkeeper Durepox was able to save. 10th minute: Anormal took the ball from Senaya in the midfield, ran over Kyaw and shot from outside the area, obligating Xu to make a great save.

14th minute: Another attack of the home team. This time, Kyaw received the ball after Mataitai tackled Heitor and dribbled Manuel Padaria. She saw Majrashi in a good position and crossed to her. Becão headed, but Majrashi got the rebound and shot to the goal, but Durepox saved. 16th minute: Kyaw received the ball again in the midfield and passed to Komu. The attacker tried to score shooting from outside the area, but sent the ball over the bar. The game was close and equal, and both teams could score.

http://img.terra.com.br/i/2006/06/10/351337-4825-ga.jpg
Game had lots of goal opportunities

19th minute: Ray Kirs made a good play from the left side of the field and passed to Anormal. The giant dribbled Charisteas and made a long ranged pass to Heitor, who controlled the ball and invaded the area. He passed to Manuel Padaria who delivered it back to Heitor, who shot. He was blocked by Ke Sho. 22nd minute: Ganz Ijak received the ball from Fuchs and was going to invade the area when Hasebe fouled him. Foul and yellow card to him. Kliek took the free kick and gave no chances to Xu scoring the goal.

25th minute: After suffering a goal, Ariddia started to regain the control of the match, missing few passes and creating good goal opportunities. Senaya received the ball, dribbled Wantuirso and passed to Lescrit. The attacker shot, Durepox gave the rebound but Becão was able to get it. 28th minute: Kliek got the ball in the midfield and passed to Heitor. The attacker invaded the area and shot, but sent the ball wide. In this same minute, Heitor received the yellow card after complaining with the referee.

30th minute: In a fast counterattack, Kyaw passed the ball to Argentier, who crossed it to the area. A player headed it and scored the goal. 33rd minute: Another counterattack where Argentier receives the ball and crosses to the area. This time, Majrashi heads, but the goalkeeper Durepox saves easily. 35th minute: Cafundéu got the ball in the midfield with Priotto, who passed it to Kliek. The midfielder was well marked by Charisteas, so he had to pass to Ganz Ijak, who shot the ball. It hit Ke Sho and went wide. The corner was a missed chance, as Ke Sho headed the ball to safety.

39th minute: Cafundéu had another good chance to score after Ray Kirs made a good play passing the ball to Anormal. The giant midfielder shot the ball with strength, and it hit the face of Charisteas, who fell dizzy on the ground. He was ok, but Melenciuc decided to put Zandberg in his place for safety. After that, Anormal took the ball from Zandberg and shot again, but this time he sent the ball over the bar. Cafundéu’s coach made a change, putting John Kimball, of Atlético Jutense, in Kliek’s place.

42nd minute: Senaya got the ball in the midfield after Ke Sho passed it to him. He controlled it for some minutes and then passed it to Majrashi, who shot the ball to try to score. Durepox saved but gave the rebound, and a player got it to score the second goal of Ariddia in the game. 45th minute: Heitor received the ball from Kimball in the entrance of the area and tried to score shooting from outside the area. The goalkeeper Xavier Xu made a good save and the first half ended.

http://img.terra.com.br/i/2006/06/10/351400-5974-ga.jpg
Fans of both countries came to watch this game

Many changes were seen for the second half. Evgheny Melenciuc put Eo La in Hasebe’s place and Rider in Lescrit’s place. Franz Braddock of Cafundéu put Incisivo in Ganz Ijak’s place, tested the young player Daniel Brunnés, of A.F.F team, putting him in Becão’s place, and even decided to put the top goalscorer of Cafundó do Juta’s squad Coqueiral, removing Priotto from the game. With many changes, the second half started, and many goal chances were seen until the end of the game.

1st minute: Kimball took the ball from Zandberg and started a counterattack. The ball reached Incisivo, who invaded the area and passed to Coqueiral. In a very good position to score, the striker shot, and Xavier Xu made a save that can go to history, fantastic. 3rd minute: Ariddia replied when Senaya received the ball in the midfield and shot before entering in the area. The ball made a curve and hit the post of Durepox’s goal. Rider got the rebound but shot the legs of Brunnés instead the ball.

5th minute: Confusion in the midfield. Zandberg and Manuel Padaria crashed and started to discuss. Both received a yellow card. 8th minute: Ke Sho passed the ball to Argentier and received the ball back near the area. He shot, but the goalkeeper Durepox made a good save. 11th minute: Fuchs and Ray Kirs started running and crossing the ball between them. Fuchs passed to Ray Kirs, who dribbled Eo La and passed to Fuchs. He decided to cross the ball to the area, and Anormal headed it, but sent the ball over the bar.

After ten exciting minutes, the game started to slow down, and the attacks weren’t so powerful than they were in the start of the second half. 16th minute: Kyaw made a good play and created a goal chance for Ariddia, passing the ball to Majrashi. She dribbled Brunnés, but Durepox got the ball. 20th minute: Manuel Padaria received the ball from Anormal and sent it to the attack with a long range pass. Coqueiral received the ball and passed to Heitor, who dribbled Mataitai and shot, but sent the ball wide.

Ariddia made two changes after this play. Melenciuc put al Safi replacing Argentier and decided to defend a bit more putting Cohen in Komu’s place. 23rd minute: al Safi hit the ball in the first time in this game, but lost the ball to Manuel Padaria. Senaya got the ball back and sent it to the area, where Rider headed it, but Durepox made an easy save. Then, Braddock put Hauser in Manuel Padaria’s place. 26th minute: Anormal ran over al Safi and passed the ball to Kimball, who shot from outside the area and missed the goal.

http://img.terra.com.br/i/2006/06/10/351512-1720-ga.jpg
Coqueiral misses a chance

29th minute: Ke Sho shot the ball sending it to the attack. Kyaw received the ball but was fouled by Hauser. 31st minute: After the free kick, the ball was being controlled by Ariddia near the area. Majrashi received the ball and invaded the area, when Wantuirso fouled her. Penalty and yellow card to Wantuirso. A player shot and scored the goal. After the goal, Franz Braddock made the last two changes in Cafundéu’s team. He changed Fuchs for Vandick, the main right-back of the national team, and changed Kirs for Resitiv, a promising attacking midfielder who plays for Ranca Toco.

35th minute: Another good chance for Ariddia. This time, Cohen sent the ball to Senaya, who received and dribbled Kimball before passing the ball to al Safi. She invaded the area and shot, but sent the ball over the bar. 38th minute: Anormal got the ball and started to attack, running over two opponent players. He reached the area and passed to Resitiv, who battled with the goalkeeper for the ball. Both lost the ball which was gotten by Ke Sho. 40th minute: Rider heads the ball after a corner, but sends the ball over the bar.

43rd minute: Cafundéu had the last good chance of the game in a counterattack started by Anormal, who passed to Heitor. The attacker dribbled Eo La and Mataitai and shot, but Xavier Xu saved. Hauser got the rebound and crossed to the area. Coqueiral headed, Heitor hit the ball and it hit the post. Resitiv tried to get the rebound, but Mataitai reached the ball first. 45th minute: Zandberg received the ball and passed it to Cohen, who crossed it to the area. Rider headed but missed the goal. Then, the game ended.

After the game, the newcomers were very happy in playing for their nation and started to talk about this experience. Resitiv said: “I participated in few plays, but the sensation of playing with Cafundéu’s shirt is amazing. I hope to play more games in the future.” Brunnés said: “It’s difficult to play a game against such a strong opponent, but I think that I did well my job.” Coqueiral was very happy and said to the media: “It was wonderful to play for national team, even losing. I have to thank the coach Braddock for making this dream come true.”

Kimball was the one of the newcomers that played most time. He said few things to the media: “I know that I’m not a member of the national team’s squad, but this game can help me to battle for a spot, maybe in the next competitions.” The coach Franz Braddock said: “We lost, but this is a friendly match, so nothing to worry about. The next game, against The Mice of Miceland, I think that is the second most important game that we’ll play in the next rounds. If we win and Spaam loses, we can be very close of the WC. World Cup, of course.”

http://img.terra.com.br/i/2006/06/20/359079-8044-ga.jpg
Ariddia supporter watching the game

ARIDDIA 3x1 CAFUNDÉU

Place: Stade National Rêvane-Sud, in Ariddia.
Attendance: 56,423 people.
Referee: Van-Der-Lei.
Man of the Match: Xavier Xu(Ariddia).

http://spaam.mrdrake.net/flags/ariddia.png ARIDDIA: Xavier Xu, Mataitai, Hasebe(Eo La) and Ke Sho; Kyaw, Charisteas(Zandberg), Sheyi Senaya and Argentier(al Safi); Komu(Cohen), Lescrit(Rider) and Majrashi.
Coach: Evgheny Melenciuc.

http://spaam.mrdrake.net/flags/cafundeu.png CAFUNDÉU: Durepox, Fuchs(Vandick), Kirs(Resitiv), Becão(Brunnés) and Wantuirso; Anormal, Manuel Padaria(Hauser), Priotto(Coqueiral) and Kliek(Kimball); Heitor and Ganz Ijak(Incisivo).
Coach: Franz Braddock.

Ratings:
9- Xavier Xu, Ke Sho and Majrashi.
8- Mataitai, Senaya, Becão, Anormal, Kimball and Coqueiral.
7- Kyaw, Argentier, Kome, Lescrit, Rider, Durepox, Fuchs, Kirs, Priotto, Kliek and Heitor.
6- Hasebe, Eo La, Charisteas, al Safi, Vandick, Brunnés, Wantuirso, Manuel Padaria, Ganz Ijak and Incisivo.
5- Zandberg, Cohen and Resitiv and Hauser.

GOALS: ARIDDIA: 30’/42’/76’(OOC: I can’t choose Ariddia’s goalscorers).
CAFUNDÉU: Kliek 22’.

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Cafundéu – next game’s formation: Vargas, Vandick, Kirs, Becão and Sávio Ferrari; Anormal, Mercegues, Brahma and Kliek; Heitor and Ganz Ijak.
Style of +2

The Daily Quak
Sharks Tie World Number 3

The Quakmybush Sharks traveled to Bedistan to take on the World Number 3 Lions. The Sharks were really looking forward to this match as a chance to prove themselves as a good team. The Sharks were cleary nervous at the start of the game, this showed when Gang Min-a came in on goal and put the ball by Cam Carroll, 1-0 Bedistan. It didn't get any better in the 9th minute when Jacob Murphy took a shot from the top of the box to make it 2-0 Bedistan. The home crowd was going nuts, they thought they were going to see a rout. In the 39th minute the shutout bid was ruined when Cory Sorley passed the ball to Jon Fields who made no mistake, 2-1 Bedistan. That was the score going into the half. The Shraks came out alot better this half, Jon Fields passed to Cory Sorley who found the back of the net, 2-2 score. The Sharks clearly had the momentum now, they used it to their advantage when Ryan Fret shot from outside the 18 yard box and scored to make it 3-2 Quakmybush. The Sharks thought they had the game won, that was until the 88th miute when Jacob Murphy tied the game up. The game ended 3-3 which is a very good result for Quakmybush.

Quakmybush - 3
Fields 39' Sorley 49' Fret 57'

Bedistan - 3
Min-a 4' Murphy 9' 88'

http://spaam.mrdrake.net/flags/bazalonia.png Bazalonia 2-2 Sel Appa http://spaam.mrdrake.net/flags/sel_appa.png (posted on IRC by Milchama)

The Turtles drew another match, this time at Bazalonia. They continue to show the ability to hold off top-notch teams and even score a goal. Though only a friendly, this shows what future matches may come out to be in the vital second round. A few wins against the top teams in the group could promote Sel Appa back to third place and into the qualifiying 30. Coach Charles DuPont is eager and it seems Sel Appa finally has its chance.

They started off pretty early in third place and were only knocked down by two losses to Az-cz and Liverpool England. All across the nation, people are supporting the team by buying jerseys, caps, other items, and even just talking about the team. Grand Archduke Kirby II said the team "is very impressive" and said he was pretty certain they would make it this time. Betting stations across Sel Appa are pourign out various odds and bet offers. Qualification odds hover between 33% and 66%, with a large concentration at 50%. Others offer a lot of 2-1 and 5-2 odds.

The Turtles next play Cataduanes next, ranked 36 in the world ans right behind Sel Appa in the group. The previous match against them ended with a 3-3 draw, a similar result is expected here, however Sel Appa has the home team advantage this time. A win or draw is necessary to preserve Sel Appa's place or promote it. Just above Sel Appa is Qutar, which is only one point ahead. They play Az-cz, which last time gave a 2-0 loss. If Qutar loses again, and Sel Appa wins, then The Turtles will be promoted to third place. A draw is possible, but relies on goal difference to promote.

Good Luck to the Turtles! ALLEZ LES TORTUES!

Pre-Second Round Group Standings:

Team P W D L PT GF GA GD
Az-cz 8 7 1 0 22 27 3 24
LE 8 7 0 1 21 31 6 25
Qutar 8 4 1 3 13 19 14 5
Sel Appa 8 3 3 2 12 15 17 (2)
Cataduanes 8 2 4 2 10 14 14 0
Okielahoma 8 3 1 4 10 9 11 (2)
Algal States 8 3 0 5 9 8 23 (15)
Tocapa 8 1 1 6 4 8 18 (10)
Anrow 8 0 1 7 1 5 29 (24)

On the First Day of World Cup 32 the soccer gods gave to me, hosts named Milchama and Geisenfried.

On the Second Day of World Cup 32 the soccer gods gave to me 2 World Cup Draw, and hosts named Milchama and Geisenfried.

On the Third Day of World Cup 32 the soccer gods gave to me, 3 bad scorinators, 2 World Cup Draws, and hosts named Milchama and Geisenfried.

On the Fourth Day of World Cup 32 the soccer gods gave to me, 4 World Cup Re-draws, 3 bad scorinators, 2 World Cup Draws, and hosts named Milchama and Geisenfried.

On the Fifth Day of World Cup 32 the soccer gods gave to me, 5 scoreless draws, 4 World Cup Re-draws, 3 bad scorinators, 2 World Cup Draws, and hosts named Milchama and Geisenfried.

On the Sixth Day of World Cup 32 the soccer gods gave to me, 6 noobie nations, 5 scoreless draws, 4 World Cup Re-draws, 3 bad scorinators, 2 World Cup Draws, and hosts named Milchama and Geisenfried.

On the Seventh Day of World Cup 32 the soccer gods gave to me, 7 royal ass kickings, 6 noobie nations, 5 scoreless draws, 4 World Cup Re-draws, 3 bad scorinators, 2 World Cup Draws, and hosts named Milchama and Geisenfried.

On the Eighth Day of World Cup 32 the soccer gods gave to me, 8 huge upsets, 7 royal ass kickings, 6 noobie nations, 5 scoreless draws, 4 World Cup Re-draws, 3 bad scorinators, 2 World Cup Draws, and hosts named Milchama and Geisenfried.

On the Ninth Day of World Cup 32 the soccer gods gave to me, 9 penalty shootouts, 8 huge upsets, 7 royal ass kickings, 6 noobie nations, 5 scoreless draws, 4 World Cup Re-draws, 3 bad scorinators, 2 World Cup Draws, and hosts named Milchama and Geisenfried.

On the Tenth Day of World Cup 32 the soccer gods gave to me, 10 clinched qualifiers, 9 penalty shootouts, 8 huge upsets, 7 royal ass kickings, 6 noobie nations, 5 scoreless draws, 4 World Cup Re-draws, 3 bad scorinators, 2 World Cup Draws, and hosts named Milchama and Geisenfried.

On the Eleventh Day of World Cup 32 the soccer gods gave to me, 11 wooden spoons, 10 clinched qualifiers, 9 penalty shootouts, 8 huge upsets, 7 royal ass kickings, 6 noobie nations, 5 scoreless draws, 4 World Cup Re-draws, 3 bad scorinators, 2 World Cup Draws, and hosts named Milchama and Geisenfried.

On the Final Day of World Cup 32 the soccer gods gave to me,12 people bitching. 11 wooden spoons, 10 clinched qualifiers, 9 penalty shootouts, 8 huge upsets, 7 royal ass kickings, 6 noobie nations, 5 scoreless draws, 4 World Cup Re-draws, 3 bad scorinators, 2 World Cup Draws, and hosts named Milchama and Geisenfried.



(ooc: Happy Holidays to all nations)

After using the same logo for its third World Cup attempt, the Football Federation of Sel Appa has decided it is time for a new logo. They announced a contest for all citizens of Sel Appa to design a new logo and enter it in. Entries are limited to one per person. All entries will be evaluated by three judges, who will give a score out of 100. The three scores will be averaged together and the highest-scoring entry will win and will very likely be chosen as the new logo for the FFSA. The winner will receive a free home and away jersey with their name on the back and the new logo displayed on the front. They will also receive a football autographed by the team, Coach Charles DuPont, and FFSA President Henri LePoivre.

A cute 20-something girl in sexy Santa suit.

"Hi this is Dazza Dallas. JGN are back at giving away stuff again like it's Christmas. This time it's something new and different. Sorry, no hot dates with Dazza but something you take home without getting your partner suspicious. JGN are giving away 10 new groovy Honda motorbikes. Yes, these little babies go upto 250 km per hour with all the sports equipment Santa can throw at you. You even get spare gear for your partner to sit on the back too. Oh yes, 3 years insurance fully paid up too. It's the Honda D1100 - bred and born on the racetracks of the world. If you this bike so you can get work fast or just to pick up chicks, please enter. Hit the JGN web site on www.jgn.com.jew and click on me with the sexy Santa suite like the one I'm wearing now. Fill in the personal details and say in 100 words why you deserve the Honda D1100. I will personally deliver one the bikes to one of the lucky winners myself, so please enter. Oh yes, usual conditions apply - employees of JGN and affiliates cannot enter. Ho ho ho - grab ya bike and get motoring! I forgot to mention, you get to choose the colour scheme you want and even put ya name on it if you want or even an image of me if you desire. So enter and win this. Limited offer for this World Cup 32, make your friends all jealous. You know my friend Rocky Pointy Stick has one of these and he takes my niece Rashina around the town with this hot thing. It's a race machine and guaranteed get attention."

MD12 RP Cutoff

MD12 Scores (http://forums.jolt.co.uk/showthread.php?p=12127590#post12127590)

Dazza: Hey, this is Dazza "lock up your boyfriend" Dallas.
Rocky: And I'm Rocky Pointy Stick. My father Ricky had fly home due to one of my family being sick, so Rocky instead of Ricky. And this is THE FOOTBALL LIFE.
Dazza: This cheeky bugger is dating niece Rashina too.
Rocky: I like it here. I must avoid tempation!

Dazza:
Speaking of tempations, the motorbike competition is hitting off well. Thousands of mainly males are trying to win one of 10 Honda D1100 motorbikes. I think me sitting on one those in them videos on the web site is doing the job. Actually Rocky gave me a ride on his bike, and boy it's fast.
Rocky: That was fun!
Dazza: Me sitting on the bike with you or the ride?
Rocky: Everything, everything.

Dazza: OK, Rocky want do think of the girls from Dorian and Sonya?
Rocky: Nice girls but Jeruselem girls play better football. Hot girls all the same.
Dazza: Kate Bush and the team took on the girls from Dorian and Sonya. And boy, was it one sided! The girls tried but team Jeruselem crushed them FIVE NIL.
Rocky: Sadly, the opposition were no match for Jeruselem's strike force. No Dazza in the team but today, the opposition were glad there was no Dazza anyway they way they performed.

Dazza: We're not letting up. Us and Bettia want to qualify, for the sake of Nedalian fans too.
Rocky: Too bad about the Lions today, sad.
Dazza: Lions took on Lions - yes the Bedistan vs Nedalia game. Guess who won?
Rocky: (sighs) Bedistan

Dazza: Oi Rocky, get ya hand off my skirt. If you're going to do something, do it properly - you know what I mean.
Rocky: Bad habit (smiles) from Dad.
Dazza: Yeah, the Nedalians got hammered by Bedistan FOUR TWO and well, another loss to the Bedistan.
Rocky: That's alright, the Bedistan Lions are such a good team.

Dazza: Other results - no real surprises.
Rocky: Bettia beat Cuation again, TWO ONE to the Bettians who are still rolling on - only we can stop them in their tracks.
Dazza: Cuation needed the win but once again Bettia show why they can match with the best like Jeruselem. Third place is so far away from 1st and 2nd.
Rocky: Class act Bettia. Yes, we beat them once but they are no pushovers. Have to work to beat them.

Dazza: Yafor 2 too advantage of the Bettian win thumping lowy Seckland THREE NIL.
Rocky: That third spot is going to be hard to predict with three good teams in the hunt.
Dazza: Yafor 2 are one of them but if Tylenia have a say - it would not be.
Rocky: Tynelia struggled to overcome the lowly The Gold TyGrr TWO ONE. Yes, it still three points and Cuation suffered today.

Dazza: So, today nothing really happened.
Rocky: I guess it's YAP YAP where Dazza talks about err, anything.
Dazza: A lot of new Mums ask what the new bubs is going be? Well, can't say yet. If it'a boy, I'm going to him Peter and if's its a girl, then it's Sonya. My first child is John after my father's name. I'll tell everyone as soon I find out, so them gossip columns don't get the jump.
Rocky: Hey, how does John feel about being a grandfather 2nd time?

Dazza: The coach isn't fussed. He's worried about his wife having a child.
Rocky: Why's that?
Dazza: I don't think we wants a second Dazza for while.
Rocky: Ah, that's a pity.

Dazza: That's it from me. People enter the competition before it's too late and your friend turns up a brand new bike and a few chicks.
Rocky: Look, the bike is good. I've got and I recommended it. Even Dazza does.
Dazza: And that's from backseat rider.
Rocky: She's fun to have as a passenger you know.

Group 10:
Jeruselem [5-0] Dorian and Sonya
Tynelia [2-1] The Gold TyGrr
Seckland [0-3] Yafor 2
Bettia [2-1] Cuation

Group 5:
Nedalia [2-4] Bedistan

QAZOXIAN TIMES

1ST HALF REVIEW

Its was a rather dissapointing 1st half of Qualifying for the Black Oxen as they only went 4-0-4 in their 8 matches, leaving them behind Schiavonia, Wentland and Arridia, the three teams Qazox was expected to contend with for the 3 spots in the World Cup.

Granted that in the last few Cups Qazox has been a better 2nd half team than the 1st half, i think the 3 game losing streak early on might just cost us a trip to either Geisenfried or Milchama.

But there is hope as Qazox has been one of the better travellers over the years, having won more of their games on the road than at home. With 5 road games on the schedule, the Black Oxen have a shot, but need to win their 1st game, At The Mushroom kingship, who has outperformed most expectations so far.

I see Qazox going 5-1-2 over the final strech, but that one tie will cost tehm as they fall 2 points short of qualification.

IF YOU WISH UPON A STAR

NSWC Match Day 12

Fort Europe - 2 - V - 0 - Raging Penguins

Report by Amy Bystander, Commonwealth News.

It may be pantomime season in the theatres of the Commonwealth, but the Fort Europe side are not fooling around as they produced another victory taking them another step closer to a serious challenge for qualification. Michelle Bishop scored yet another stunning goal on the stroke of the hour, and defender Aki Haddon finished off with a well placed header on the far post from another of those choreographed set pieces that have earnt the team a fair measure of respect during this competition. The half time entertainment was provided by the cast of Jack and the Beanstork, by the Fortress Theatre Company who are performing at the Grand Stape theatre.

"I think we have some serious competition for ticket sales with these actors, they arn't half bad and perform with the same level of passion we do. I'm taking my daughter to see the full production on wednesday." Said Fort Europe youngster Josephine Blanchard after the match. Fort Europe remain third in group nine, still just one point behind Starblaydia and four points ahead of their closest threat. There is still a long way to go before they are assured qualification, but the team are willing to put up a hardy fight and promise their best in every match they have left.


PLAYER RATINGS
(Out of 10)

7 - James West
7 - Floe Peltsten
8 - Tim Forrester (C)
9 - Aki Haddon (84)
8 - Gemma Lloyd
8 - Katherine Keller
7 - Ryan Holmes
7 - Vicky Princess
8 - Mia Nevola
9 - Michelle Bishop (60)
8 - Karl Isaak

SUBS

- - Tom Reas
- - Laura Harris
- - Murphy Lee
7 - Edowine Sanjuan (On for Princess (45))
- - Josephine Blanchard

“Good evening, Assegai Developments football fans!” yells out Mikaela Eyre. She’s in a pub and it’s very loud. Behind her, Assegai supporters are chanting loudly. “We’re reporting live from a pub in Lisburn, where the lot of Assegai supporters that traveled with the team have congregated with the players themselves to celebrate tonight’s incredible, 2-0 upset over Lisburn Mateys.”

As she finishes, Assegai forward Dominic Saint-Émilion can be seen in the background climbing onto a table, a huge stein in his hand, and begins to lead the supporters in a chant:

“Build a bonfire! Build a bonfire! Put E.S.F. on the top! Put Qazox in the middle and we’ll burn the f***in’ lot!”

Hearing this, Mikaela blushes a bit.

“So, yeah, everyone is going nuts over here,” she says. “Just in case you missed it, though, let’s recap the events of tonight’s game.”

As she talks, video rolls of the plays she describes.

“A huge crowd of 69,950 packed National Stadium in Maze, expecting Lisburn Mateys to defeat Assegai Developments after both team had battled to a draw in their first encounter in Leá Monde.

“Assegai took control of the actions immediately, though, establishing their attacking routes and putting Lisburn’s backline on alert. However, despite a constant wave of attacks, Lisburn’s defense held tight, which allowed them to pull off a stunning counterattack near the end of the first half. With time winding down, Lisburn midfielders Keith Livingston and Richard Naylor combined on a give-and-go to stretch out Assegai’s defense. Forward Richard Dougherty filtered through the backline and chased down a through ball, beating Assegai keeper Edward van de Beauchamp, low to the far post. The game went to the half 1-0 with Lisburn Mateys on top.

“The goal seemed to have affected the psyche of the Assegai squad and Lisburn pressed the advantage, taking over midfield and establishing a perimeter that kept crossing the ball, looking for any breaks. Nevertheless, Assegai’s backline clamped down, allowing the confused midfield to get their act together.

“Robbing Lisburn midfielder Aaron McCann of the ball in the 66th minute of play, Assegai midfielder Aly Spicer broke out on a run with forward Samantha Neesa. As they approached Lisburn keeper Brian Livingston, Spicer faked a pass to Neesa and took one more step before firing a blistering shot past Livingston, whose ankles gave out on him.

“Assegai slowly regained control of the momentum and 10 minutes later, Neesa was the recipient of a cross that she chested down and chipped over the charging Livingston, giving Assegai the lead they would need to win the game.

As she finishes, the supporters in the back get very loud and start chanting again:

“Through the dearth of darkest night! Through the brightest day and light! We support you, mighty, mighty ASSEGAI! ASSEGAI!”

Neesa, Spicer and backup keeper Callo Merlose, all wearing Assegai tank tops and short shorts can be seen dancing with each other atop another table.

“We actually managed to steal team captain Ashley Riot away for a few seconds,” says Mikaela bringing a beer-soaked Riot into the picture. “Ashley, your thoughts on the game?”

“Wow, what can I say? Hey, we won!” he says raising his arms. “No disrespect to Lisburn Mateys, but after drawing with them at Assegai, it was like blood in the water for us; we knew we could beat them. I’m glad we were able to live up to our word!”

“What do you have in mind for your next game, back home, against Stromboland? Another ‘Pinocchio’ viewing party?” she asks him.

“Heh, that was fun wasn’t it?” he chuckles. “Uh, we’re going to prepare for that game, just like we did last time. We’re not going to let up on and them, and hopefully, we can win and give our fans something to cheer about at home. By the way, you know how we have that fierce rivalry with E.S.F.? Still, it was hard to see them get crushed tonight. They deserved better than that. It’s nice to see that Fort Europe beat those Raging Penguins. It was a pity we didn’t get to play them in that friendly we had scheduled, we really like those chaps.”

As he finishes, Neesa runs up to them and hand a beer to Riot.

“Well, I gotta get back,” he says smiling.

“Thanks for your time, Ashley,” says Mikaela turning back to the camera. “Well, we hope you enjoyed this live broadcast from a pub somewhere in Lisburn. We hope you have a great night. This is Mikaela Eyre signing off!”

In the background, Riot jumps onto a table with Neesa and begins chanting:

“You are my Neesa, my Sammie Neesa! You make me happy when skies are gray! Oh, Severus Snape is a lot meaner, but, please, don’t take my Neesa away!”

Game Summary

http://spaam.mrdrake.net/flags/lisburn_mateys.png Lisburn Mateys 1
http://spaam.mrdrake.net/flags/assegai_developments.png Assegai Developments 2

[LIS]
Richard Dougherty (45’)

[AD]
Alys Spicer (66’)
Samantha Neesa (76’)

The Daily Quak
Sharks Recieve Early Christmas Gift

The Quakmybush Sharks continued their dominating World Cup 32 qualifying run in Quakmybush against Race Track. The Sharks were looking to continue their four game winning streak. Allan Brooks was named starting keeper as Cam Carroll needed a rest and Hubert Yurt had a tender shoulder. The Sharks game out ready to play in their home stadium. Jon Fields continued his hot streak, scoring a wonderful goal in the 7th minute to make it 1-0 Quakmybush. The Sharks heart rates rose when Player Number 14 game down the wing and took a shot, however, Allan Brooks stood tall and made a good save. The Sharks extended their lead in the 29th minute when Cory Sorley took a free kick that found the back of the net to make it 2-0 Quakmybush. This was the score going into the half. A bit dissapointing as many chances were saved or just missed the net. The Sharks game out flying in the second half. Cory Sorley scored his second of the game in the 48th minute to make it 3-0 Quakmybush. Sorley found the back of the net for a third time in the 50th minute to give him a hattrick. 4-0 was the final score.

Quakmybush - 4
Sorley 7' Sorley 29' 48' 50'

Race Track - 0
None

We caught up with coach Greg Hughes to talk about the Sharks next matchup against New Montreal States. "Coach what do you think your chances are?"

"Well, we beat them last time, so we can beat them again."

"And will you play any different?"

"No, we will just play our normal style."

Goal Scorers
Jon Fields - 11
Cory Sorley - 11
Matthew Graves - 3
Andrew Plett - 1
Ben Miller - 1
Ryan Fret - 1
Mike Martin - 1
Clifford Baker - 1
Darrel Ralegigh - 1

Article By: Rick Juras

Dan: I'm Dan Reynolds.

Adam: I'm Adam Plumbtree and after massive national reaction to our firing we created our own broadcast and television and radio show off of fan donations. We love you all. Except for you ETHEL GRANGER I'M GOING TO KILL YOU! So welcome to World Cup Chat.

Dan: Adam now lets not get all in a tizzy. Who the **** is Ethel Granger?

Adam: Long story.

Dan: How long?

Adam: Longer than my ****.

Dan: Well thats not very long.

Adam: You've seen it?

Dan: Errr... I think we should go to scores now.

Cataduanes [2] Tocapa [2]

Adam: Are you an idiot Dan? Thats yesterday's scores.

Dan: Oh right.

Sel Appa [2-1] Cataduanes

Dan: Can't decide if that helps or hurts.

Adam: Well probaly neither. We need to catch both of those nations and i think that result has us tied with Cataduanes. Sel Appa is sitting in fourth just above the melee of 5-8th.

Liverpool England [3-1] Okielahoma

Dan: Not incredibly shocking, another goal for Harris that's 9 for him and 1 for the rest of the squad. We aren't clicking on offence this cup for sure Adam.

Adam: Oh right you are Dan, not firing on all cylinders for sure.

Az-Cz [1-0] The Islands of Qutar

Adam: Suprising Dan?

Dan: Not at all really i think that Az-Cz is clearly the better side of the two, and they should have second place behind Liverpool England in group 1 here.

Algal States [3-0] Anrow

Adam: Anybody care?

Dan: No

Goal Scorers

Harris 9
Wilson 1

"...what a shot!!! Lawrence has equalized for Wentland...and there's someone on the pitch...looks like a red-head in a false moustache and glasses...the security forces are after him...oh, good rugby-tackle, sir...oh no, he's escaped, leaving the policeman with jacket in hand...and out he goes into the crowd..."

"That doesn't take the shine off the goal, though, Geoff..."

"No, indeed, Geoff...Wentland may yet sneak a point out of this..."

"Indeed, Geoff...keeping the unbeaten record going...nine matches, no defeats..."

"Norman Hacker always said you had to sort the defence before the attack, Geoff...and he's done just that..."

"That's right, Geoff...Schiavonia averaging nearly 3 per match before tonight and they've been pegged back to the one..."

"And there's the whistle, Geoff...Wentland one Schiavonia one...and the Swifts are demonstrating that their form is not a flash in the pan as they hold one of the top teams to a draw..."

"Yes, Geoff...and given the news we're hearing from The Maze it looks as if the Swifts are to remain five points inside qualification, but are a point further away from the Mateys..."

"That's right, Geoff...although one gets the feeling that Qazox are due a spurt..."

"Indeed, Geoff...Hacker will not rest on laurels..."

<symbol of the “Tynelian Nightly Sporting News with Jeff Jefferson” looms in the background>

Jeff Jefferson: Now its time to take a look at the World Cup. A tough one today but the team still got the win 2-1 over The Gold Tygrr. I’m surprised it was this close Dinah.

Dinah Miller: Well it was a bit of a letdown I think after putting up a Tynelian record six goals against Seckland last match. But a win’s a win.

Tom Thompson: And it looks like they’ve avoided the usual scoring slump.

Dinah: I told you that was just something people got into their heads. But I never expected eight goals in the last two matches. Jakes and Connor MacDougal came through again in a game where the team did not look very sharp.

Jeff: This is a tough stretch coming up though, good thing they got this kind of match out of the system before that.

Dinah: Yes this will be a tough pair of matches, Yafor 2 and Bettia, we only got one point out of those matches last time. We’ll probably need 4 this time around.

Jeff: Cuation losing sure helped.

Dinah: Yes but now they only have Jeruselem left to play of the teams ranked ahead of them and we have all three of ours. Plus they still have a two point edge on us.

Tom: So we’re screwed then?

Dinah: Not necessarily. Remember the last home match with Bettia we did get a draw. And thanks to the Seckland match we find ourselves in the very strange situation of only being 5 goals behind the Bettian assault force in goals scored.

Jeff: I think this is probably the best goal differential we’ve ever had. We actually win it this time.

Dinah: Well we have to catch up first. A win against Yafor 2 is a must of course. Otherwise I don’t see Cuation dropping back. Of course we have to beat Cuation in the rematch too to get the points back they took from us in the first half. Being on the road for both these matches makes it really tough.

Tom: Well we’re not doing that well at home. Maybe we’re better off on the road.

Dinah: That’s another odd thing for Tynelian teams, we seem to do worse against lower ranked teams at home but better against the higher ranked one. That is a good sign considering both Bettia and Jeruselem will be coming here.

Jeff: So what you’;re saying is that it won’t be easy.

Dinah: Exactly, barring a major slip up by Cuation the only way we’ll catch them is to pull off an upset or two and take care of business against the teams below us.

Jeff: That will be something at least for this group. So far every match played by a top five seed in the group has ended in either the higher seed winning or a draw. There has not been a major upset in the group with over half of group play done.

Tom: Shh, you’ll jinx us Jeff.

Jeff: That’s just superstition. Besides Yafor 2 is right below us, it wouldn’t be a major upset if they beat us.

Dinah: But it would kill our chances to qualify more than likely if they do. But Cuation is playing Seckland and I highly doubt they will do anything but win there. To be honest barring a major collapse Jeruselem and Bettia are out of reach for us Cuation is the only ones we can catch. We’re still within a couple points and hold the goals differential advantage on Cuation. Sorry I don’t get to say that much, Tynelia with a GD edge. Makes me giddy.

Tom: So do you want to make any predictions Dinah?

Dinah: I told you guys I don’t do predictions. I’m no Dana Lee you know.

Jeff: True, in fact Dana had proven to be so popular in Schiavonia that she was offered and accepted a job working there after TSW went under. Though they think she’s some sort of psychic there after getting a few lucky guesses last Cup.

Tom: Yeah but she didn’t predict getting fired though did she?

Dinah: Hey you know its only because everyone’s gotten so frustrated over how we move up the ranks every Cup but never quite make it that fans turned away. After that its just a ratings thing.

Jeff: You have a point there Dinah. And that’s all the time we have today. Next show the Tynelian Curling League season preview as well as more results from the World Cup qualifiers. Good night everyone.

CAFUNDÉU CONTINUES WITH THE GOOD CAMPAIGN

http://img.terra.com.br/i/2006/09/28/401240-9853-ga.jpg
Cafundéu didn't make an excellent game, but got the three points

Another good result for Cafundéu, as the team was able to get three more points, this time playing against The Mice of Miceland at home. All the supporters that went to the stadium received binoculars to see the mice playing, and were impressed by the good performance that the home team showed. Of course, the supporters had to return the binoculars to the stadium, and some people that tried to steal it were arrested. The police says that more than a hundred thieves were arrested.

With this result, Cafundéu is more close to be qualified. Now, with seven rounds to go, the team is in the third position, two points behind The Lowland Clans and seven points in front of Spaam. Cafundéu’s next game will be against Oliverry, the leader of the group, away, so the supporters know that the team probably won’t return with points, but Spaam can’t pass Cafundéu yet. Since this was a very calm game, no cards were shown to Cafundéu and the main team can be used.

THE GAME
In the first game of the group, Cafundéu played against The Mice of Miceland away and was surprised by the fast plays that they created. Because of that, suffered a goal in the beginning of the game, although was able to recover and drew the match. This time, Cafundéu already knew the mice’s style. They started using all their speed to attack and score a fast goal, but the defense could stop most of their attacks and counterattacked very well. Franz Braddock’s formation worked very well too.

2nd minute: Piper FluteMouse received the ball in the midfield and passed to Charity FieldMouse. He ran fast and invaded the area, but Becão tackled him with style. 5th minute: Charity FieldMouse received the ball again and passed this time to Fievel ChurchMouse, who shot. The goalkeeper Julio Vargas made an easy save. 8th minute: Cafundéu started to reply. Anormal took the ball and dribbled Stuart LittleMouse. He reached the entrance of the area and shot, but sent the ball over the bar.

12th minute: Brahma got the ball in the right side of the field and made a good play dribbling an opponent. He crossed the ball to the area and Ganz Ijak headed. Pinky WinslowMouse saved. Heitor tried to get the rebound but Pinky WinslowMouse reached the ball first and held it. 15th minute: Sightless ThirdMouse got the ball and made a long range pass to Sickly PlagueMouse, who invaded the area and shot, but sent the ball wide. Cafundéu’s defense wasn’t giving any space for the mice to attack.

19th minute: Ray Kirs started running and was fouled by Input ComputerMouse, who received the yellow card. The free kick was taken with speed and soon Mercegues received the ball, passing it later to Kliek. The midfielder invaded the area and shot, but he sent the ball wide. 22nd minute: Nibbler FatMouse started a fast counterattack for the mice, reaching the attack. He passed the ball to Stuart LittleMouse, who was tackled by Sávio Ferrari. Piper FluteMouse took the rebound and shot, but missed the goal.

24th minute: Vandick got the ball and crossed it to the left where Kliek got it. He controlled the ball and then dribbled Sightless ThirdMouse, who fell on the ground after the wonderful dribble that he suffered. Kliek passed the ball to Anormal, who invaded the area but lost the ball to a defender. 26th minute: Ray Kirs passed the ball to Mercegues, who saw Heitor in a good position and passed to him. The attacker invaded the area and shot, but the ball hit the post and then left the playing field.

30th minute: Reepicheap started another counterattack for The Mice of Miceland, this time passing the ball to Charity FieldMouse after reaching the midfield. The midfielder sent the ball to the area, where Fievel ChurchMouse got it and shot, but Vargas used his reflexes to hit the ball with his leg before getting it. 33rd minute: Heitor received the ball with good chances to score when Angel BalerinaMouse fouled him, receiving the yellow card. Kliek took the free kick, but Pinky WinslowMouse was well positioned and saved.

36th minute: Input ComputerMouse dribbled Mercegues after getting the ball and passed it to Piper FluteMouse. The midfielder didn’t find someone to pass and because of that had to shoot to the goal, where Vargas made an easy save. 38th minute: Becão got the ball and started a counterattack, passing the ball to Anormal who started to run fast. Unfortunately, Anormal crashed with the referee, who didn’t see the giant running. Both fell on the ground and the game was stopped for some minutes when the referee was treated by the doctors.

42nd minute: Cafundéu was better in the game, but didn’t create a good chance to score. In this minute, Brahma received the ball and invaded the area, passing it to Ganz Ijak. The striker dribbled Nibbler FatMouse and shot, but the goalkeeper Pinky WinslowMouse made a great save. Injury Time: Heitor reached the attack, but Reepicheap took the ball from him. He tried to start a counterattack, but was fouled by Brahma. After the free kick, the referee ended the first half with a goalless draw.

http://img.terra.com.br/i/2006/11/23/423810-1141-ga.jpg
Brahma being substituted

Franz Braddock realized that the team was better in the game, but couldn’t create good goal chances and didn’t finish well. He made no changes in the team, but made few changes in the team’s strategy, as Mercegues and the wing-backs started to help the attack more. The Mice of Miceland made no changes too. The Mice of Miceland started the game with a fast attack, where Sickly PlagueMouse invaded the area with speed and shot to the goal, but he sent the ball wide.

4th minute: Ray Kirs came from the left side of Cafundéu’s midfield and crossed the ball to the area. Becão headed it but the ball went over the bar. 6th minute: This time, Vandick passed the ball to Mercegues, who was well marked and had to pass to Kliek. The midfielder dribbled Angel BalerinaMouse and passed the ball to Ganz Ijak, who shot. The ball went near the goal, but wide. In these few minutes of the second half, Cafundéu’s new strategy was being successful.

10th minute: Stuart LittleMouse started to run fast since the midfield, and was fouled by Sávio Ferrari. Fievel ChurchMouse took the free kick very well and obligated Vargas to make a strange save, showing that Cafundéu’s goalkeeper wasn’t expecting a good set piece. 13th minute: Anormal got the ball and ran over two mice before passing to Brahma. Heitor and Ganz Ijak were waiting the ball in good positions, but Brahma decided to shoot from outside the area and the ball went over the bar.

17th minute: Piper FluteMouse received the ball and made a good play in the left side of the field dribbling the experienced Mercegues. He crossed the ball to the area, but Sickly PlagueMouse didn’t reach the ball, so Becão could easily get it back to Cafundéu. 20th minute: Mercegues received the ball from Vandick and ran to the right wing. There, he passed the ball to Kliek who shot from outside the area. The ball hit a defender and Heitor before going wide,

23rd minute: Finally, the goal. Anormal tackled Input ComputerMouse and passed the ball to Ganz Ijak, who invaded the area, dribbled a defender and the goalkeeper to score his sixth goal in the championship. After the goal, Braddock asked the wing-backs to defend more, and Mercegues became the second defensive midfielder of the team. 25th minute: Charity FieldMouse received the ball and tried to score shooting from outside the area, but Vargas saved.

Braddock realized that Mercegues wasn’t performing well in the role of defensive midfielder and because of that put Menzir in Brahma’s place. After that, the mice found more difficulties to reach the opponent area. 29th minute: Sávio Ferrari stopped an opponent counterattack and passed the ball to Kliek. The midfielder sent the ball to the attack. Heitor got it, dribbled Reepicheap and shot to the goal, but Pinky WinslowMouse made a great save avoiding the second goal of Cafundéu.

31st minute: Input ComputerMouse tried to start a counterattack for The Mice of Miceland national team, but Menzir took the ball before he could reach the attack. 34th minute: Angel BalerinaMouse shoot the ball to the attack. Ray Kirs headed the ball, but Stuart LittleMouse got the rebound. He wasn’t able to invaded the area, so he shot. He made a good shot, as the ball made a curve, but Vargas was ready to hit it and send it for a corner. Charity FieldMouse took the corner kick, but Becão headed it to safety.

38th minute: Vandick was tired, so Braddock put Cafézinho in his place. In his first play, he crossed the ball to the area, but Ganz Ijak missed it. 41st minute: Sightless ThirdMouse got the ball and sent it to the attack. Fievel ChurchMouse deceived Sávio Ferrari and got it, invading the area and shooting, but missing the goal. 44th minute: Mercegues passed the ball to Kliek, but the offensive midfielder stepped on the ball and fell. After this ridiculous situation, no more good chances were seen and the game ended 1x0.

After the game, the defensive midfielder of Cafundéu Menzir said to the media: “This game wasn’t exciting and didn’t have lots of goals, but we made our job. We win and now it’s all that matters.” Ray Kirs talked to the media too: “It’s good to win, these games are always difficult and we can continue with good possibilities to go to the World Cup.” Brahma was the last one to talk: “Our opponents were very fast today and made many counterattacks. Fortunately, we could stop them and got this victory.”

The coach Franz Braddock was satisfied with the team’s performance: “A win is a win, no matter the result. Ganz scored a goal and because of that we won these important three points. Now we are seven points in front of Spaam, with lots of difficult games to play yet. For example, the games against Oliverry, The Lowland Clans and even the game against Spaam, so nothing is decided yet, and we have to do our best to get a place in the World Cup.”

http://img.terra.com.br/i/2006/11/14/420661-0679-ga.jpg
A member of Cafundéu's staff preparing the team before the game

CAFUNDÉU 1x0 THE MICE OF MICELAND

Place: Campo de Batalha Stadium, in Penderia.
Attendance: 77,000 people(full).
Referee: Arlindo Frenscheut.
Man of the Match: Anormal(Cafundéu).

http://spaam.mrdrake.net/flags/cafundeu.png CAFUNDÉU: Vargas, Vandick(Cafézinho), Kirs, Becão and Sávio Ferrari; Anormal, Mercegues, Brahma(Menzir) and Kliek; Heitor and Ganz Ijak.
Coach: Franz Braddock.

http://spaam.mrdrake.net/flags/the_mice_of_miceland.png THE MICE OF MICELAND: Pinky WinslowMouse, Reepicheap, Angel BalerinaMouse, Nibbler FatMouse and Sightless ThirdMouse; Input ComputerMouse, Piper FluteMouse, Stuart LittleMouse, Charity FieldMouse and Sickly PlagueMouse; Fievel ChurchMouse.
Coach: that mouse in the bench.

Ratings:
8- Vargas, Becão, Anormal, Mercegues and Ganz Ijak.
7- Vandick, Kirs, Sávio Ferrari, Brahma, Heitor, Pinky WinslowMouse, Nibbler FatMouse, Stuart LittleMouse and Charity FieldMouse.
6- Cafézinho, Menzir, Kliek, Reepicheap and Piper FluteMouse.
5- Angel BalerinaMouse, Sightless ThirdMouse and Input ComputerMouse.
4- Sickly PlagueMouse and Fievel ChurchMouse.

GOAL: CAFUNDÉU: Ganz Ijak 68’.

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Cafundéu – next game’s formation: Vargas, Vandick, Kirs, Becão and Sávio Ferrari; Anormal, Priotto, Mercegues and Kliek; Heitor and Ganz Ijak.
Style of +2

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Goalscorers after 9 games:
6- Ganz Ijak
3- Heitor
2- Anormal
1- Kirs, Brahma and Becão

Being a rain cloud in Az-cz isn't much fun. First off, we rarely get to come out and play in general. And even less do we get to come out and play at fun events. The few rainy days we get are rarely arranged to have concerts, parties or anything else. But this time we got a treat, as the match between The Islands of Qutar was scheduled for Knight's coliseum on a day when we were rolling through. So we got to soak up the field and enjoy the festivities.

With a soaking wet field the match played out much differently than normal. First off the fans were less energetic than usual. Despite being generally considered an excellent fan base, even Az-czzers lose a little energy in the rain.

Secondly the pitch was wet and ball control wasn't as good. Players from both team struggled to make crisp passes and the game was a pretty ugly one. Pizelkaxrovsky looked out of sorts and unable to get anything started, but the Qutaris looked worse and the game was pretty much just kicking the ball back and forth. Hardly the kind of match I wanted in my only game out, but hey, beggars can't be choosers.

The game went into halftime and still nothing had happened. In the second half the teams came out and continued to do absolutely nothing. It definitely looked like the game was going to be a washout, figuratively and literally. Hehehe ;) Get it? It's a pun. I'm a riot aren't I? Anyways, the match seemed to be headed in the direction of the itsy bitsy spider when I had a huge influence on the match.

The Gnomes had pushed the ball up towards the Qutari goal and Ml-Dni fired in a cross. The keeper caming running out to punch it out and it looked like he'd be able to get to it just fine when he just slipped and face planted right into the mud. The net was now wide open and Kn-Dg corralled the ball and slipped it into the open net.

From their the Gnomes bogged down :) and held off the Qutari attack for the rest of the match. So their fans went home happy even if it was an ugly rain-soaked game. And I went home happy cause I got to come out and play. I guess everyone's a winner. Well, except for the Qutaris, but I guess they're an acceptable sacrifice.

Amda-Mo: Well, it wasn't as easy as last time around, but the Gnomes do start the second half in victory, 1-0 over The Islands of Qutar.

Lur-Mn: No, it was a difficult game and we recieved a break on our only goal, but the fact is we beat The Islands of Qutar twice without allowing a goal. That's an accomplishment.

Amda-Mo: So give us your breakdown of today's game.

Lur-Mn: Today's game was won through total team effort. Pizelkaxrovsky was struggling in the rain the team continued to try to make plays and create chances while continuing to work hard to keep the clean sheet and eventually their effort payed off.

Amda-Mo: So are you saying we out worked the Qutaris?

Lur-Mn: In short yes.

Amda-Mo: How much does coaching play a role in a match like this?

Lur-Mn: Some, to be sure, but not as much as you might think. Playing in those kind of conditions is never fun and how focused and determined you are is usually the number one factor in inclement weather.

Amda-Mo: Wow, that's a big word, you probably misused it.

Lur-Mn: Neither of us really no do we. Maybe one of our fans will write in with a comment.

Amda-Mo: Alright, back to the football. Update us as far as our qualifying position goes.

Lur-Mn: Well we're very well positioned. We just need to keep going along as we are and not lose focus and we'll make it with room to spare. It's still too early to start doing permeatations, but with a 12 point lead on 4th place, we're in very good shape. No matter what else happens we can clinch with 9 points.

Amda-Mo: Wow, who'd have thought we'd be that close to qualifying already.

Lur-Mn: Well who'd have thought we'd be undefeated through 9 matches? The team's playing incredible. You have to tip your hats off to everyone involved. And I mean everyone. The FA's done a great job of putting the pieces in place, especially the coaches, and then getting out of the way. Some FA's get to involved, but Noz-Tf and crew have wisely stayed out of the way. And the coaches have just done a brilliant job. There were doubts about pairing coach Khim and coach Hawdon, but it's worked out brilliantly. And the players are playing magnificently right now. Az-czid soccer fans are just walking on air.

Amda-Mo: Next up we travel to Anrow. Thoughts?

Lur-Mn: I don't see any way they'll stop us from collecting the full three points. We've been playing marvellously and they've been playing terribly, excepting that one blip against Cataduanes. But we need to avoid looking past them to the match against Sel Appa, where we could all but clinch qualfication.

Amda-Mo: Prediction?

Lur-Mn: Az-cz 4 Anrow 0

Amda-Mo: Alright. Well the producers have decided to permanently cancel my three awards segment, but we're working on coming up with another idea. But for now I'll leave you with one last three awards segment. This one is about (reaches into a box) farm animals.

Well the shepherd dog award goes to Nerazzuri. He really had his troops well positioned on the pitch today and got them where they needed to be. A very nice job with the yellow band.

The goat award goes to the goat of the match, the Qutari keeper.

And the house cat award goes to Pizelkaxrovsky. He was lying in the sun today, seemingly having an off day, but is still a deadly hunter at heart. Expect him to bring home some figuartive carcasses of his opponents in upcoming matches.

"...And as predicted, the Turtles defeated Cataduanes 2-1 and slid back into third place behind Az-cz and Liverpool England, who have been trading places back and forth for most of the qualifiers. Third place was more stable, starting with a surprising Algal States, then Sel Appa, and Qutar moving up to replace Sel Appa. But now, we're back and we intend to stay here strong and solid so we can qualify. The match against Cataduanes was nothing spectacular. Estevez scores once and twice. The opposing side tries to catch up at the last minute. Nothing special from these younger, weaker sides.

Well, we play Tocapa next, which we defeated 2-1 last time and I expect a similar match this time, especially considering we're home this time. Qutar is our only worry, they play Liverpool England, which is pretty much guaranteed to be a loss for Qutar. We need to keep our current record going and defeat Qutar and at least draw against Az-cz or Liverpool England to stay in third. The remaining matches are pretty much in the bag. Considering we only have away matches against Qutar, Az-cz, and Liverpool England, it is easy to expect some good stuff.

Now you will see on your screens the current group standings:

Group 1: GP W D L PT GF GA TGD
Az-Cz 9 8 1 0 25 28 3 +25
Liverpool England 9 8 0 1 24 34 7 +27
Sel Appa 9 4 3 2 15 17 18 -1
The Islands of Qutar 9 4 1 4 13 19 15 +4
Algal States 9 4 0 5 12 11 23 -12
Cataduanes 9 2 4 3 10 14 15 -1
Okielahoma 9 3 1 5 10 7 13 -6
Tocapa 8 1 1 6 4 9 19 -10
Anrow 9 0 1 8 1 5 31 -27

After playing our ninth counted match, our record is a remarkable 4-3-2, considering previous Cup runs, which never saw a plurality of wins. We are down only one goal, which should be collected against Tocapa. I'd also like to note Anrow, which finally got their first point in a draw against Cataduanes. Expect them to continue their life at the bottom, having scored only 5 goals against Algal States, Tocapa, Cataduanes, and us. But, to Anrow, don't lose heart. Some teams just aren't able to make it in the world. But maybe, someday you will make it somewhere, be it top non-qualifier or the Cup of Harmony. I'm Jake Stan from the Sel Appa Sports Network, we now go live to the kickoff of the Nemnen Turtles and the Anvorbuod Rebels."

"Can New Propagandia defeat Noremark at the Victor Square? After a string of disheartening defeats a chance finally arises as New Propagandia play Noremark, who they were beaten by 3-2 in Noremark. I'm Larry "Bark" Dogman and currently at Victor Square, the pride of New Propagandian football."


Dogman in his trenchcoat stood on the pitch, the New Propagandian players were in the background walking on it in their training gear.


"New Propagandia said we'd "Have" Noremark next time round. But will we? Well if we can keep a stiff defense and don't allow Noremark to overwhelm us we may just pull it off. That is, if perhaps we can get a good "Starry night" and a little Khuzaymah magic."


Then the Line-up in the 4-4-2 diamond formation showed up.


"Can New Propagandia defeat Noremark at the Victor Square? After a string of disheartening defeats a chance finally arises as New Propagandia play Noremark, who they were beaten by 3-2 in Noremark. I'm Larry "Bark" Dogman and currently at Victor Square, the pride of New Propagandian football."


Dogman in his trenchcoat stood on the pitch, the New Propagandian players were in the background walking on it in their training gear.


"New Propagandia said we'd "Have" Noremark next time round. But will we? Well if we can keep a stiff defense and don't allow Noremark to overwhelm us we may just pull it off. That is, if perhaps we can get a good "Starry night" and a little Khuzaymah magic."


Then the Line-up in the 4-4-2 diamond formation showed up.

The Bostopian Football Association would like to issue the following statement.

"We apologise to all Football Associations and their fans who could not see their games broadcast from Bostopia due to technical difficulties. Bostopia has suffered electrical storms over the past few days, due to solar flares, and therefore most communications signals were out of order.

While it is no consolation now, our country was also rather defenseless.

We would now like to apologise to our own fans for the national side's poor performance these past few games, and we are pushing for a revival in fortunes."

Hello Netizens,

Here is your favorite blogger from somewhere in Rejistania again. Yeah, from somewhere since I am today blogging from the wonderful kalesa of Ulura. Yeah, this is rejistanian and means anywhere or somewhere but it also is nen for Place of the kovheh-trees. Nah, I have no idea why the nen decided to name a place like that, but then, they also have place names like Where Hjuri played the Senmne (Alokejurisenme) or Hidingplace of the She-Devils (Ja~oja~olelnekuta). I guess that makes Ulura kalesa appear much more sane.

Talking about 'kalesa' have ye noticed that in most other languages, the term 'city' or 'kalesa' is not adjectivized? So the Demot team comes from the City of Skyhaven or from Skyhaven City, not from Skyhaven as city or the cityish Skyhaven (this 2 would be a more literal translation). It just struck me as being interesting. Now sue me for wasting some time of your life in order to read this paragraph!

Okay, about the match, what can I say? "Close affair", "could have ended the other way around"? The greatness of the language is that I can say this even though it has nothing to do with the truth. The truth is that the Orange-Blues pretty much handed Demot their behind. Or I am lying here as well. Language can do that. Yeah, I am in a rather philosophical mood today due to being surrounded by all these nen... Nothing against nen, they might be fine people and all that, but they are rather incompatible to any rejistani rejasanja. The nen, the seleke and the ly are great at making me feel like a foreigner in my motherland. Aaaaaaanyways, according to my view, we pretty much dominated the Demot team, and yeah demoting Demot is fun¹! David Masteron had his chance at a time, where it didn't matter: Aia already declassed the demoti goalie twice. Later Na~eta and Jemeru would add one each to the score. Even though I still think Asaikivelemanakere Ralaseletikivenemaratede is more nuts than an entire bag of Jajhim'ny², his insanity might even work. Even though "rejistaniha'he'ny mi'hetaki" still does not sound as right as "rejistaniha'he'ny mi'divensi", the Orange-Blues actually _can_ play an attacking 3-4-3.

¹this would not be my blog if I again would not relativate things. Getting attacked by the demoti black dragons surely is no fun, especially since the dragons do not spare users of OpenSource Operating Systems as the Giant Defense Tuxes of System Karela would do.
²if ye have no idea what Jajhim'ny are, you haven't lived yet but only existed! Liim-flavoured nut-goodness in a bag! it's surpreme! (Now hand me over the money, Jajhim-taleka JSK!)

Dear Diary,

Please forgive me for neglecting you for a few days. What with the Foundation Day celebrations and all I hope you understand.

Since my last entry there have been 2 matches. The first was the 100th anniversary replay of the World Cup 7 final with Spaam. This time no penalty shoot-out was necessary as Errinundera won 1-nil in the 90 minutes allotted.

The match was held in the capital, First Creek Falls, at the Downfall Stadium. Fortunately, recent rains on the plateau have meant that Hairy Man Falls had some water.

http://i55.photobucket.com/albums/g136/regnans/East%20Gippsland/DownfallStadium.jpg

To commemorate the WC7 match each of the 26 bays in the stadium was named after one of the players from that match. Some famous names are included.

WC7 Spaam side:
Fin Súrion
Méla Sëhelin
Rohir Dorth
Fin Teinwë
Inwë Lossë
Darát Ar-Fein
Amras Tinúviel
Decán Elanessë
Súri El Sar
Nessa Ringer
Tathar Telemnar
Sára Londë
Amras Celebri

WC7 Errinundera side (I’ve got photos of longipesp, moschatuma and snapier):
antarcticad
longipesp (below):
http://i55.photobucket.com/albums/g136/regnans/East%20Gippsland/womancover.jpg
joyhilla
moschatuma (below):
http://i55.photobucket.com/albums/g136/regnans/East%20Gippsland/moschatuma.jpg
adealbata
melanoxylona
codith
horstrac
snapier (below):
http://i55.photobucket.com/albums/g136/regnans/East%20Gippsland/snapiersmall.jpg
pomaderrisa
regnanse
firset
delegatensise

Before the kick-off the cup and the ball kicked by longipesp to score the winning goal were paraded around the ground. Some Nazis ran onto the pitch during the parade. After speaking with the potoroo coach, withare, they voluntarily left the ground. I wonder what he said to them. He does have a way with words, does withare.

The current-day captain, the angelic genderqueer rosaniel, was forced to miss the match due an ankle injury suffered during practice. In quer place, for the match, the honour was given to matherosperma who is also the great-great grandson of Errinundera’s World Cup 7 captain, moschatuma. Weird names in that family. Not as weird as the Spaam names, though.

Even though they no longer take part in World Cup football, Audioslavia, the hosts of the WC7 final, sent a delegation. The leader of the delegation, Tom Cornell, was given the privilege of announcing the players to the crowd.

Reports of the match in Cornellby, Audiolavia 100 years ago say it was a high-speed skilful game with many shots on goal. Apparently the 2 goalies, Fin Súrion and regnanse had spectacular games. Unfortunately the game witnessed by the Falls Folk was not like this at all. The teams played cautiously and defensively with few shots on goal. This seemed odd as, the match being a friendly, there was nothing at stake for World Cup 32. The only goal of the match was scored by first year player matthieug who was selected in place of the injured rosaniel.

http://i55.photobucket.com/albums/g136/regnans/East%20Gippsland/matthieug.jpg

matthieug is the descendent of Portuguese/Asian refugees that came to Errinundera many years ago. She has an amazing mixture of European and Asian features. Another odd thing about her is that she is a devout catholic – a very uncommon thing in this country. To show her devotion she has images of nail wounds tattooed on the souls (ouch!) and insteps of her feet. Why?

The tempo of the game may have been cautious but the celebrations afterwards were conducted with wild abandon. Errinundrians, Spaamanians and Audioslaves alike blitzed themselves in nightlong depa gas raves.

The team subsequently travelled to the civil rights lovefest known as Haraki. According to the University of the Global Environment they have a Utopia rating of 56. Their pre-occupation with mammon brings down their score significantly. Tickets for the match, from β16,000 to β103,000, were way beyond the financial capacity of ordinary Errinundrians. As a result there were virtually no Errinundrians in attendance.

The very pro-Haraki crowd was in full voice as their team scored the first 2 goals of the match (6th and 20th). withare re-organised the team and the potoroos slowed the game down to regain control of the match. Experience asserted itself as the captain, rosaniel (38th), and vice-captain, venu (40th), squared up the game.

The second half was a torrid affair with the two teams competing as if their very lives depended upon the result. No goals were scored until a defensive error by the Harakis in the 88th minute allowed addicksonia to score a penalty. The final result was thus 2-3 to Errinundera.

The Harakis could very easily have won the match as moments before they were called off-side when they were 2 out against evolu, the potoroo goalie. Analysis of the video footage indicates that the linesperson, who was behind the play, may have made a parallax error.

The potoroos now have a bye before hosting Rorysville at the Cavern. I hate byes, especially early in the fixture. It seems we are always trying to catch up.

Dance 2 Revolution's confusing team situation continues, as "Team D2R" (as we've heard the team of mysterious people call themselves) fell to a 3-2 loss at the hands of New Montreal States. The manager was reportedly happy with his players effort during the game, after ??? [Playing Left Midfield] and ??? [Playing as a lone striker] pulled two back in the second half.

"We obviously wern't prepared for the New Montreal States side to come at us like they did, and i'll be attempting to avoid the defensive slip-ups early in the game from now on. I couldn't have asked more from the players coming out of the tunnel from 45 minutes with a 3 goal defecit..." said the manager

"...except of course a third or fourth goal" he added with a small smile.

The post-match interview ended when one of the media-representatives asked for the D2R manager's name, a question in which he replied: "In due time..." and left the interview hall.

And so the question of "who the hell are these people?!" still remains on the lips of the few D2R fans who have managed to see them in action. No matter who they are, they are proving to be Dance 2 Revolution's best chance of qualifying since they last did so, which is a long time ago.

The Revolutionarian Football Association still is keeping quiet about the situation, not declaring whether they have any involvement with the withholding of the identity of the team and the manager. Many conspiricists in the media have been claiming that the RFA didn't even know that this particular team was representing D2R in the cup, although several representatives have viciously denied this accusation, which is proof enough for some that they are hiding the truth.

The citizens of Dance 2 Revolution may actually get to see their team for the first time. With all home matches being played behind closed doors for the home team at request of the D2R manager, and only several thousands being able to travel to away games, the Revolutionarian Football Association have reportedly struck a deal with TV channel "Revolutionarian Sports 4" for the airing of Dance 2 Revolution qualifying games, which had previously not been aired in the nation, starting with Dance 2 Revolution's home match with Quakmybush. This game, the RFA also declared, has had the "behind closed doors" order reversed. The match has been moved to the Naoki Maeda Memorial Stadium, which had been upgraded to 135,000 capacity for the Cup of Harmony. Naoki Maeda is also rumoured to be making a showing.

RP Cut off MD 13

Demot Daily ~ Glimmers

After taking a horrible thrashing at the hands of Rejistania, the Dynamo showed their poise and maturity by coming back and defeating Paleoslavia by the second largest margin in Dynamo history. The 6 nil victory makes things very interesting in group 8, as we now stand only a four points behind Errinundera, whom the Dynamo will look to try and bounce them in Skyhaven on matchday 15. The team will be reveiwing all material availble with the upcoming bye, and hoping that a little rest will do them some good as the prepare to do battle for the last qualifying spot. Both teams are deserving of the spot to be sure, but unfortunate for one, only three sides are allowed to advance per group. Whichever squad is the one left out will be sure to think they did not get the deserved fate.

As for the match, it was a rather boring affair, with the Dynamo soo clearly superior to thier foes, that not even the goals brought much flavor to the game, apart for a few minutes of cheering. Ysman, Masteron, and Black all two goals, while Frontson had an amazing feat of assisting on all six of the Dynamo's goals, earning him Man of the Match honors, as well as taking the rest of the squad out to eat on his dime.

Article by Jasmine Olyvander

* Funky theme song *

<Short cute redhead and a military man standing in a hotel>

Dazza: I'm Dazza "steal ya boyfriend" Dallas and this is THE FOOTBALL LIFE ONE ON ONE on Jeruselem Government News. I'm with military man Major John!
Major: I'd happy to be here Dazza and greetings to the good people out there watching us.
Dazza: I hear the Jeruselem military are creating their own soccer team.
Major: Yes, we are. Soon we will be putting our name on the world stage, too. The World Cup team, the Women's World Cup team and now this new team.

Dazza: So why's this new team going be called?
John: Well, the Crusaders and Angels are taken but we are going call ourselves the Desert Rats.
Dazza: Sounds interesting, why Desert Rats?
John: We spend most of our time in the deserts of Jeruselem in sand like rats, so it's right.

Dazza: Where will this new team come from?
John: Current military personnel from all over the nation. We are currently scouting talent right now to find the men and women we need to create this team. If a player is signed by anyone, they can't join as we don't want to violate any of their contracts.
Dazza: What is the main aim of this team apart from winning games.
John: Well, you see - many fit young men and women don't the armed forces as they can't do the things they love like playing soccer. Now, you can be defending the nation and play soccer too.

Dazza: You allow women, that's a change from old policies.
John: You see, we want to attract women too. Once upon a time we would not have allowed female players but now, we have to. So many women want to be a new Dazza and it's new market to get.
Dazza: I assume it's all discipline for this new team.
John: Yes, yes. No getting all knocked up for the wrong reasons before a tournament for example. The girls in our team can't get away with what you do but we don't dislike you either. The boys in the armed forces look forward to watching THE FOOTBALL LIFE like any people do.

Dazza: So, I'm the number one pinup girl then?
John: Yes indeed, we do allow Dazza pinups. Actually, if we didn't they'd be a revolt on our hands.
Dazza: This new team - what games are they going to play?
John: Firstly, some local games against local clubs. Later, maybe friendly Internationals and even one against your team Dazza.

Dazza: Do you have a home stadium yet?
John: No, no. We are looking and might even need to hire one. We are not building a new one as it's not practical at the moment.
Dazza: What happens if one of your team get a national call-up to the World Cup or Women's World Cup team?
John: No problems. They will be allowed to play as they are doing it for our nation.

Dazza: Now, what do think of our current team here.
John: I can't comment really. They are doing so well and let's hope we can make the semifinals.
Dazza: Who is going to be the coach?
John: We are looking for one now. We'll even accept a foreign coach if we have to. We will pay well.

Dazza: Eh? What's the matter?
John: Your skirt is wrong way round. The side slit is in the front - we can see your undies.
Dazza: Oops, that's what happens if you're late sometimes. I remembered my underwear at least.
John: This sort of thing never happens in the armed forces but then you're Dazza, not many like you. That's the brand of underwear my wife wears, err, never mind that.

Dazza: What sort of coach are you looking for?
John: Well, someone who likes discipline and early mornings too. A tough coach who doesn't take rubbish from his players.
Dazza: You military people are like that.
John: The only way to run an army.

Dazza: So what does the military offer for women?
John: Everything, the best place to work and learn the real world.
Dazza: So you want super fit young women like me to join the future.
John: To join the super fit young men of the armed forces, yes. Just hope they aren't all like you though, we'd never get anything done because you're so distracting.

Dazza: That's it for THE FOOTBALL LIFE ONE ON ONE. If you're a military person and want join the team, ask Major John here.
John: Yes, a new team for the Jeruselem military. Like our men and women, we aim to kick ass like Dazza's team at the World Cup 32 here.
Dazza: And coaches out there - if you're interested, call Major John about this new opportunity.
John: We want the best coach and have money too. Please call.

*A tired 50 year old man with pits under his eyes and wild hair steps to the podium
Randy: Hello folk i'm Randy Evans and i'm sure you know who that is. You probably might be wondering why I called this press conference at six in the morning. Well because i'm an early morning person. You're going to have to deal with it.

*Reporters snap more pictures

Randy: Ok enough with the pictures y'all ok? Jeesus. Bad enought I have to be here anyway.

Reporter1: Why is it bad enough you have to be here? Didn't you call this press conference?

Randy: Did I say "Ask questions"? Hmmm did I? Well the answer to that is no. And you can start asking you damn questions when I say so. Clear? Good. Now i'll get down to why I am here. As many of you may know the Okielahoma men's soccer team is struggling deeply at world cup qualifications. I feel a change needed to revatalize the qualification. This is why I am resigning the position of manger for the club. Thank you and have a wonderful day.

*Evans leaves without taking questions

Reporter1: But he said there would be time for questions!

Reporter2: Shutup you faggot.

QAZOXIAN TIMES

Tough game today as Qazox blew two one goal leads in the second half as they came aay from The Mushroom Kingship, with a much unneeded draw.

Stefany Heisel scored twice, but TMK scored win the 78th and 88th minutes to pull off the shocking draw.

The draw leaves Qazox 9 points out of the 3rd spot in the group, and with the next few games against teams ranked higher then them, qualifing seems to be a very long shot at this time.

Up next is Ariddia at home. Qazox needs to win this match or else it will be a long 4 years before they have a chance to get back into the World Cup.



Game Summary:
Goals:
Qazox: Heisel (8,9) 40', 82'
TMK: Unknown- 75', 88'
Cards:
Qazox: None
TMK: yellow: #7- 32'; #9- 56'

<symbol of the “Tynelian Nightly Sporting News with Jeff Jefferson” looms in the background>

Jeff Jefferson: Now let’s move on to the World Cup. Tynelia avenged an earlier draw with Yafor 2 coming out on top 3-1 in today’s match. That has to be a big help for the team Dinah.

Dinah Miller: Every win helps Jeff, the team has to take care of business against the lower teams if they plan to move on in this group.

Tom Thompson: Yeah this group is pretty dull. Still after the half way point now and none of the top five seeds have lost a match to a team ranked below them and today our match was the closest.

Dinah: Yeah but your scoring curse is definitely out of the picture. 11 goals in our last three matches is almost offensive-like.

Jeff: But Bettia is next.

Tom: Yeah the guys that always beat us 3-1 for some reason.

Dinah: Don’t forget we got a draw last time they came to Tynelia though.

Jeff: And we need a point at least, Cuation already lost to them so if we can get a draw that would gain us a point for third.

Tom: Yeah we took care of Yafor 2 today, they’re out of it now.

Dinah: That almost sounds like Matt there Tom. Four points still isn’t something that you can’t makje up. Of course they’re six back of Cuation. That will be tougher.

Jeff: A nice variety of goals today. Bill Jakes and Connor MacDougal again leading the way with Mia Thompson getting her second of the tourney mixed between them.

Dinah: Yeah Connor is having a great cup so far. Reminds me of a young Jay Masterson kinda.

Jeff: Well he’s only two goals back of Masterson’s all time Tynelian goals mark of 11 with more matches to go. In fact he’s only one behind his uncle Alan at 10.

Tom: Don’t forget Jakes, two cups and he’s already third all time behind Jay and Alan.

Dinah: And only three goals behind the team’s all time record of 26 set at last world cup. Could Tynelia actually become a scoring power now?

Jeff: I think that’s stretching things a bit, but I think this might be the first time we finish in the top half of the total goals listings instead of lurking in the bottom third like usual.

Dinah: yeah you’re right I was getting a bit excited there. Let’s see how we do against Bettia this time and we’ll go from there.

Tom: Well last time we gave up a third of all the goals allowed so far. Gordman had a bad game there.

Dinah: Be fair, he didn’t do any worse than our other keepers. Amy Whiteworth gave up 3 to them and so did Vladimar Malloy and they’re both in the hall of fame now.

Jeff: So Gordman has hall of fame potential?

Dinah: Who knows its still too early to tell but I’m just saying giving up three goals to Bettia doesn’t mean you’re lousy.

Jeff: Well speaking of early, it looks like we’re running late…

Tom: Bad segue there Jeff.

Jeff: Hey its my show I can segue however I want to. And now we’ve reached the end of the program for today. But with this segment slowly getting better ratings the past few shows we’re going to go back to the past and start of tomorrow’s program with the update on the Tynelia match with Bettia. Rumors are flying that some of these later matches may actually get some live television time if Tynelia can put up a good showing with Bettia. Tune in then to see if soccer becomes mainstream again. Until then good night everyone.

NEMESIS

Starblaydia - 2 - V - 1 - Fort Europe

Report by Amy Bystander, Commonwealth News.

Fort Europe faced their toughest challenge yet, away from home against the number five seeds in a match that could quite litterally have gone either way. Fort Europe would have been considered major underdogs here if not for their previous form, the last meeting between these two sides not withstanding. Fort Europe however were unable to dominate this game as they have done in others, and were unable to completely shut down this stronger opposition resulting in a second defeat at the hands of Starblaydia. The homeside however will not be entirely pleased with this outcome, leaving their winning goal until the dieing moments, after Michelle Bishop headed home a second half equiliser from Mia Nevola's cross.

"So we lost this one, it happens but don't count us out yet, we're still third and have a good chance at qualifying. The players are still willing and enthusiastic, ready to put their all into the next game, and expect no less from the fans." Said Fort Europe's team mascot 'Angel Gabby' aka. Jo Hughes of the Stape Stage Company after the match. Once again the Fort Europe supporters were out in droves to watch their team away from home, and more of the same can be expected in the comming matches as the Commonwealth side push on towards their goal of reaching the knockout stages in their first ever NationStates World Cup.


PLAYER RATINGS
(Out of 10)

7 - James West
7 - Floe Peltsten []
7 - Tim Forrester (C)
8 - Aki Haddon
7 - Gemma Lloyd []
8 - Katherine Keller
8 - Ryan Holmes
7 - Edowine Sanjuan
8 - Mia Nevola
9 - Michelle Bishop (79)
8 - Karl Isaak

SUBS

- - Tom Reas
7 - Laura Harris (On for Peltsten (64))
- - Murphy Lee
8 - Vicky Princess (On for Sanjuan (45))
- - Josephine Blanchard

http://img142.imageshack.us/img142/9163/starlogo2ti.jpg
Gallient effort from the Mateys

Today the Mateys played in Schiavonia and what a match it was. The players where up for the game and Paul Kirk had planned well for the game with a changed formation taking to the field.

Mateys played a 4-5-1 formation with captain Keith Livingston and also Dougherty missing from the original starting line up. Taking their places where Stephen Mc Niece and Jason Schakel. Stephen Mc Niece took the captains armband for the game

Mateys started well from the kick off, passing the ball around at will for a good 10 minutes.

Schiavonia scored first after Gucho took a pass a little heavily and ta quick striker stole the ball off him and scored easily.

Mateys managed to score before the break however after Mc Niece was bundled over after a driving run towards goal. Mc Niece then cooly stood up to hit the penalty.
He blasted it into the top left corner with the keep actually diving beloe the ball. The Mateys will have taken alot of confidence going in at the break on equal terms.

After half time the Mateys looked more relaxed and went out and actually took the lead for a brief time. Niel Livingston sprinted desperatly after a long ball from Webber in goal and his determination was well rewarded as he out sprinted the chasing defending to gain possession. The youngster then stopped regained his cool and lift his head to see what was around him . At running into the box was Huer and Scott Mitchell who had come all the way from left back. Livingston hit a fairly poor cross which a defender looked to have under control. The defender then scuffed their clerance kick so i rolled right in front of Mitchell who sent the ball home.

Mateys took the lead, can this actually be happening???

Yes indeed it was happening but wasnt to last as Schiavonia scored a quick reply soon after and then scored from an excellant free kick in the dying minutes of the game

CAFUNDÉU GETS AN EXCELLENT RESULT DEFEATING OLIVERRY

http://img.terra.com.br/i/2006/09/28/401217-8154-ga.jpg
Cafundéu had to play with its third kit(white)

The supporters of Cafundéu were nervous before this match, as this was the most difficult game for Cafundéu in the entire group stage. Most of the population wanted to know the result of the game, using the television, the radio and other ways. After a good game, Cafundéu’s National Team got a very good result, defeating the fourth best team of the world in its home. The giant Anormal scored the goal in the end of the first half, and the defenders were perfect in the second half, winning nearly all the balls and making no mistakes.

Cafundéu holds the third place in the group, with good chances to qualify. The fourth placed has seven points less than Cafundéu, but there are still six games to go, so the team needs to continue winning. The next game is a good chance to improve the country’s situation in the group, as it’ll play against The Deathbat Republic away. As Cafundéu has a good record away and the opponent isn’t a strong team, the supporters hope to see another victory.

THE GAME
Unlike the other games, where the team attacked since the beginning of the game, Cafundéu started the game slowly, trying to hold the ball looking for breaches in the opponent’s defense. Oliverry made exactly the opposite, attacking with strength, leaving the defense unprotected. Soon Oliverry got many chances, but the defenders of Cafundéu started to show all their talent. After some minutes, Cafundéu started to counterattack, finding many open spaces to create good chances.

2nd minute: The first chance of the game came after Filteau passed the ball to Gendron. The attacker invaded the area but Becão marked him well. He could pass the ball to Hunt, who shot, but Vargas saved easily. 5th minute: Another chance for Oliverry. This time, Couturier dribbled Priotto and invaded the area. Sávio Ferrari blocked his way but he passed to LaVallée, who shot and sent the ball over the bar. 10th minute: After the initial pressure of Oliverry, Cafundéu started to attack. Heitor received the ball from Kliek and shot, but sent the ball wide.

12th minute: Tisserand made a long range pass to Julianit, who invaded the area but was tackled by Becão. The defender passed the ball to Priotto, who reached the attack and sent the ball to Ganz Ijak. The striker headed the ball and L’heaureux saved. 15th minute: Anormal received the ball in the midfield, invaded the area and shot, but missed the goal and hit an advertisement board, which was broken by the ball. 19th minute: Fast counterattack created by Oliverry. The ball reached Hunt, who shot, but sent the ball over the bar.

http://img.terra.com.br/i/2006/10/11/407266-6963-ga.jpg
Oliverry couldn't defeat the strong defense of Cafundéu

23rd minute: Ray Kirs got the ball and passed it to Mercegues. The midfielder held the ball for some moments before sending it to the attack, where Heitor received it. He dribbled Maxwell and shot, but the goalkeeeper L’heureux made a great save. 26th minute: Vandick came running from the defense and reached the attack after dribbling Filteau. He crossed the ball to the area and Anormal headed it, but he sent the ball over the bar missing a good chance to score,

30th minute: Mercegues lost the ball in the midfield and Couturier started the counterattack, passing the ball later to LaVallée. The midfielder had difficulties to invade the area, so he had to cross the ball to the area, where Vandick and Stewart battled for the ball. Stewart was able to head the ball, but sent it over the bar. 32nd minute: Priotto slided and took the ball from Filteau. He reached the entrance of the area and passed the ball to Kliek, who shot from outside the area. The ball hit Regnier and went wide. Kliek took the corner but Regnier got the ball back.

35th minute: Regnier was with the ball in the defensive area of Oliverry and passed it to Couturier. The midfielder didn’t see a team mate in a good position to pass, so he shot the ball to the attacking area. Luckily for him, Gendron got the ball, invaded the area and shot, but the ball went wide. 38th minute: Cafundéu started a fast attack with Ray Kirs running in the left side of the field. He passed the ball to Heitor, who dribbled Tisserand and invaded the area. Regnier was marking him, but he could shot to the goal. L’heureux made a good save.

40th minute: Stewart went to the midfield to receive the ball. He tried to invade the area, but Becão took the ball from him and shot to the attack. Couturier got the ball back and passed to Julianit, who tried to invade the area, but Becão tackled the opponent again, shooting the ball to safety this time. 43rd minute: Sávio Ferrari took the ball from Julianit and passed it to Kliek. The midfielder dribbled Maxwell and invaded the area, passing the ball to Ganz Ijak, who shot the ball but sent it wide.

Injury Time: in the first minute of the injury time, Priotto passed the ball to Mercegues. The midfielder saw Heitor in a good position and crossed to him. But Regnier intercepted the ball and headed it to outside the area. Anormal was there and shot the ball in the first touch. The ball went to the goal with strength, and the goalkeeper didn’t see it entering, goal for Cafundéu. After the goal, Oliverry tried to attack, but the visitor’s defense was very good and held the result until the end of the first half.

Oliverry’s coach Jean-Alan Bellemort made two changes in the team for the second half. First, he put the attacker Guernon in Filteau’s place. Later, he corrected the midfield putting Marcil in the place of Gendron, who was playing badly. So, the home team started the second half using everything that they could to try to score, while the visitors held the ball and sometimes even reached the attack with chances to score. The supporters in the stadium were very quiet, seeing a very good game with few fouls.

http://img.terra.com.br/i/2006/10/11/407263-6496-ga.jpg
The goalkeepers made good saves

1st minute: Couturier passed the ball to Stewart who started to run. Becão stopped him with a fine slide, but Guernon took the rebound and shot to the goal. Vargas was there to make a wonderful save. 5th minute: A good attack for Cafundéu started by Ray Kirs. The wing-back reached the midfield and passed the ball to Kliek, who dribbled Marcil and passed the ball to Heitor. The attacker shot to the goal, but L’heureux had good reflexes and rebounded the ball. Ganz Ijak took the rebound outside the area and was fouled by Regnier, who received the yellow card. Vandick took the free kick but missed the goal.

8th minute: Marcil passed the ball to Hunt, who ran to the right side of the field before crossing the ball to the area. Guernon missed the ball, and Sávio Ferrari could easily head the ball to safety. 12th minute: Anormal received the ball and ran over two opponents, passing the ball later to Priotto. Ganz Ijak was in a good position inside the area, but Priotto decided to shot from outside the area. L’heureux saved without difficulties and the attackers complained with Priotto.

16th minute: Anormal knocked Marcil and sent the ball to the area. Heitor got it, dribbled Maxwell and tried to shot to the goal, but Regnier blocked his path. He got the rebound, but Regnier took the ball and sent it to the attack. 19th minute: Stewart received the ball in the attack, but was tackled by Becão, who passed the ball fast to Vandick in the right wing. The wing-back reached the midfield and passed the ball to Kliek, who invaded the area. The defenders gave him no space to continue, so he had to retreat and pass the ball to Priotto, who shot and missed the goal.

22nd minute: The wing-backs of Cafundéu didn’t retreat after an attack and Oliverry had a very good goal opportunity. LaVallée passed the ball to Hunt, who was chased by the defenders. He crossed the ball to the area, where Couturier had space and headed to the goal. Vargas made a great save and Sávio Ferrari got the rebound. After that, Oliverry’s coach made the last change, putting another attacker. Maxwell left the game and Lanoie entered in the game.

24th minute: Couturier passed the ball to LaVallée who passed the ball back to Couturier. There were five players of Oliverry inside the area. Couturier crossed the ball, Guernon headed and the ball hit the post. Lanoie took the rebound, but the area was filled with players, so he had to pass the ball to Regnier who was waiting outside the area. When Regnier got the ball, Mercegues made a violent foul in the player, a very violent foul. The referee only showed him the yellow card. Luckily, Regnier could continue in the game. The coach Franz Braddock decided to put the defender Ducas in Mercegues’ place.

28th minute: Lanoie passed the ball to Julianit, who tried to invade the area after dribbling Priotto. But Ducas tackled him and Becão took the rebound. 31st minute: Ray Kirs passed to Priotto, who started to change passes in the midfield with Kliek. After one minute changing passes, an opponent player tried to take the ball, so Kliek had to sent the ball to the attack. L’heureux jumped and got the ball before Heitor and Ganz Ijak. 35th minute: Kliek made a very good pass to Ganz Ijak who ran to the goal. L’heureux left the area and fouled the attacker, receiving only the yellow card even being the last defender.

http://img.terra.com.br/i/2006/10/11/407275-0625-ga.jpg
Regnier suffered after being fouled by Mercegues

39th minute: Stewart received the ball from LaVallée and invaded the area. Ducas couldn’t take the ball back, so the attacker shot. Vargas made a good save. 42nd minute: Cafundéu had a corner. Kliek took it and sent the ball to the area. Becão headed the ball, it hit the post and stopped over the line. Ganz Ijak reached the ball and hit it, but Regnier put his leg over the ball and blocked Ganz’s shot. L’heureux took the ball from both and shot to the attack. 45th minute: Guernon shot from outside the area, but he sent the ball over the bar.

After ninety minutes of an exciting game, the referee ended the game. Cameras showed Franz Braddock answering to his assistant coach Canabrava after he asked why Braddock made only one change in the team. “They’re playing so good that it’s unfair to remove one of them from the match.” When the cameras showed Oliverry’s coach, it was the opposite situation. “How can my players play a game this way in front of our supporters?”

A giant television screen was put in the centre of Cafundó do Juta and in Obelisco Monumental Stadium in Lasft, two important places of Cafundéu. When the game ended, millions of people started to commemorate the good result, but they all know that Cafundéu needs to continue winning if wants to get a place in the World Cup. If the country gets a place, the party will be bigger.

COMMENTS
After the game, defender Becão was very happy with his good performance and spoke with the reporters: “Today was a special game for me and for Sávio. We really stopped all their attacks and helped our team to get this important result.” Priotto also talked with the media too: “It was a very good and surprising result for us. We lost the game against them at home and we could reply playing away, so it’s very good.” Ducas said: “Now we have six games to decide if we’ll play the World Cup or not. I’m very confident now.”

The coach Franz Braddock said: “I’m happy with this result. But our main opponent won their games too, so there’s nothing more to commemorate. Now we must be ready to play our last six games with all the passion and will that we played all the games until now. The players are fit and in a good form, so I was expecting good performances like this one, although our national team isn’t very known in the football world.” He commemorated a bit with the players and then returned to the hotel.

http://img.terra.com.br/i/2006/09/28/401244-4676-ga.jpg
The attackers of both teams didn't have a good game

OLIVERRY 0x1 CAFUNDÉU

Place: unknown stadium, in Oliverry.
Attendance: unknown.
Referee: Hans Pfedeler.
Man of the Match: Becão(Cafundéu).

http://spaam.mrdrake.net/flags/oliverry.png OLIVERRY: L’heureux, Maxwell(Lanoie), Regnier and Tisserand; Filteau(Guernon), Couturier and LaVallée; Gendron(Marcil), Stewart, Julianit and Hunt.
Coach: Jean-Alan Bellemort.

http://spaam.mrdrake.net/flags/cafundeu.png CAFUNDÉU: Vargas, Vandick, Kirs, Becão and Sávio Ferrari; Anormal, Priotto, Mercegues(Ducas) and Kliek; Heitor and Ganz Ijak.
Coach: Franz Braddock.

Ratings:
10- Becão and Sávio Ferrari.
9- Vargas and Anormal.
8- Vandick, Kirs, Priotto, Ducas and Kliek.
7- Mercegues, Heitor, Ganz Ijak, Couturier, LaVallée and L’heureux.
6- Regnier, Julianit and Marcil.
5- Filteau, Stewart and Hunt.
4- Maxwell, Lanoie, Tisserand, Guernon and Gendron.

GOAL: CAFUNDÉU: Anormal 45’.

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Cafundéu – next game’s formation: Vargas, Vandick, Kirs, Becão and Sávio Ferrari; Anormal, Priotto, Brahma and Kliek; Heitor and Ganz Ijak.
Style of +2

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Goalscorers after 10 games:
6- Ganz Ijak
3- Heitor and Anormal
1- Kirs, Brahma and Becão

Norman Hacker was surprisingly resilient at the press conference. "Yes, we lost...we had to lose sometime but I am proud of the lads. At least Ariddia can say that they were in a game."

"Is that a blow for qualification?"

"No...to be fair we were always likely to lose that one. We had the best news when the Fungi nicked that equalizer against Qazox. We've only lost one point to them..."

"How about Assegai's win that brings them within reach?"

"Assegai, Shmassegai. They're low fliers being kept up by gusts of wind. They'll fade away eventually. Question is, will we? It's been a tough season..."

"How about the Mateys?"

"How about them?"

"Thanks, Norman."

The Crimson Blade

Riskbreakers Impressive At Home

LEÁ MONDE, Assegai Developments — Playing in front of a boisterous sellout crowd of 50,600 at Cathedral Park, the Assegai Developments National Team took apart the visiting Stromboland squad, 4-2, never allowing them to be much of a factor in the game.

Assegai established their dominance early on against Stromboland (ranked No. 176), with midfielders Alys Spicer and Agatha Denys going on deep runs down the sidelines and sending crosses to the corps of Assegai forwards streaking in and out of Stromboland’s defense.

There were many frantic moments of confusion in the Stromboland backline in the early minutes of the game, which allowed Assegai forward Samantha Neesa to fire off a couple of blistering shots. Although they were barely turned away by Stromboland’s keeper, it set the pace for Assegai’s attack, which was relentless throughout.

With Neesa attracting a good deal of attention, Severus Snape easily snaked past the defense and flagged down a chip by Riot. Snape didn’t hesitate to fire a low shot to the far post for Assegai’s first goal in the 15th minute of play.

In the 34th minute, it was Neesa’s turn, taking a pass from Spicer on a give-and-go near midfield, she needled her way through a flat-footed defense and beat the keeper on a one-on-one, knocking the ball between his legs after juking him out.

Six minutes later, Spicer got on the board, knocking in a header from a corner kick taken by Riot.

Up 3-0, Assegai seemed completely in charge, but Stromboland laced together several passes on a counterattack and punished Assegai’s defense for not plugging holes in their wall with a goal that just beat Assegai keeper Edward van de Beauchamp.

Up 3-1 at the half, Assegai manager Sir Knight Edgard Zúniga rested Neesa, Snape, Denys and Spicer, allowing forwards Stephen de Cobham and Dominic Saint-Émilion and midfielders Duke and Joshua Bardorba a chance to stretch their legs.

Assegai maintained their superiority in the early part of the second half, allowing Stromboland to venture into their attacking zone a few times, but with no result. Assegai pressed the accelerator again in the 70th minute and the Bardorba brothers combined on a series of passes to free up de Cobham, who streaked into the attacking zone and blasted a shot that smashed into the face of Stromboland’s keeper and into the ceiling of the net, putting Assegai up 4-1.

Stromboland kept fighting, though, and caught Assegai slow to react to a counterattack in the 86th minute. Assegai defender Jan Rosencrantz tripped up the Stromboland forward as he bore down on van de Beauchamp’s net and received a red card. Stromboland converted the ensuing penalty kick, putting the score at 4-2.

Moments later, the game ended and Assegai’s supporters rocked the stands with chants and celebration. With the win, Assegai remains within range of a possible spot in World Cup XXXII.

Article by Mikaela Eyre

Game Summary

http://spaam.mrdrake.net/flags/assegai_developments.png Assegai Developments 4
http://spaam.mrdrake.net/flags/stromboland.png Stromboland 2

[AD]
Severus Snape (15’)
Samantha Neesa (34’)
Alys Spicer (41’)
Stephen de Cobham (70’)

[STR]
??? ???? (44’)
??? ???? (86’)

Red Card:
AD- Jan Rosencrantz (86’)

Turtles lose security with draw

The Turtles loss their hoped-for security in third place with a surprising draw against Tocapa. Many had thought this match would be an easy win for Sel Appa, but the Tocapan team said otherwise. The match in AnilaStad was uneventful until Alex Nart slipped a wide shot just before the far post in the 37th minute. The crowd erupted into a cheer, which continued and got stronger when the Turtles' keeper Vasily Kashchenko saved a ball that went head-on and should've gone through. The first half ended with a 1-0 lead for Sel Appa, a happy crowd, team, and especially coach.

Cowbells and drums opened the second half as Tocapa lead a huge charge down the pitch. The Sel Appan defense was backed up by retreating midfielders, together who were able to defeat the attack. Tocapa retreated and tried to hold the scoreline solid. Sel Appa continued to push, but started to weaken a little and the Turtles pulled back a bit. Tocapa's captain saw the opportunity and ordered a two-prong attack. The best players went off to the left with a distraction, while two midfielders setup to pass the ball around to the flank. The play worked and a Tocapan midfielder soon found himself face-to-face with the Turtles' goal and lobbed it in. The crowd erupted in anger, booing the away team. The 79th minute goal equalized the score. Despite continued attacking by Sel Appa to regain their lead, Tocapa would not let their goal go to waste. The scoreline remained at 1-1.

The match was a surprise, but is still fairly acceptable. The Turtles hold on to third place, albeit barely ahead of Algal States, who just edged out against Qutar. Coach Charles DuPont said he now feels even more confident Qutar was relegated. "Algal States has been an interesting team, but probably won't do more than keep Qutar at bay." Sel Appa plays away at Az-cz next. The previous meet with Az-cz was an embarrassing first loss for Sel Appa and at 5-1 no less. The only other matches against Az-cz are a 3-1 loss and a 5-0 loss. Many say this time, there are some possibilities of a small loss or even a draw. Coach DuPont said he would be "ecstatic" for a draw. Algal States plays Liverpool England and Qutar plays Cataduanes. Liverpool England is expected to win and Qutar should draw with Cataduanes.

http://spaam.mrdrake.net/flags/sel_appa.png 1-1 http://spaam.mrdrake.net/flags/tocapa.png

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v495/juvanya/wc32.png

NEW PROPAGANDIA WINS!


We said we'd beat them when they came round to Victor Square and we have. It was a dazzling game that only inspired pride to the New Propagandian's. Here's the New Propagandian starting line-up.


NEW PROPAGANDIA 2 - 1 NOREMARK
Khuzaymah '43 Krasentor '60
Starr '78 Wilkinson miss 'pen 77

GK#1 Liberkine
RB#2 Smithson
LB#3 Vesputous
CB#4 Red
CB#5 Hayden
DM#6 Lovett
RM#7 Ryane
LM#11 Steele
AM#8 Reyes
STR#9 Starr(c)
STR#19 Khuzaymah


New Propagandia were in their home kit. Noremark in their away. There were mainly New Propagandians at the sold out Victor Square but about a hundred or so people from Noremark had made the trip over.


New Propagandia kicked off and the game went underway, both teams knowing each other from their last clash. A dazzling display was about to begin.


On the 12th minute the first serious chance came when Steele, spurred on by the fans, raced down the left wing and quickly passed the ball to Reyes who drilled it at the goal, but it was saved by Renimasje with a spectacular dive, though his arms went worryingly backwards towards the goal with the momentum from the shot.


Then Renimasje's goal kick sent it back into the New Propagandian half, and Kanonen was on the receiving end. He nutmegged his way past Lovett and passed the ball to Ryhers who Vesputous wasn't letting off lightly this time. Ryhers was getting bogged down by Vesputous and Red when the Referee's whistle blew and he accused Red of shirt pulling. Krasentor and Malsen discussed who was going to take it. The whistle blew, Krasentor ran up, jumped over the ball taking the defence by suprise and it was taken by Malsen who was close behind. It went to the far post, Aranosk headed it but Smithson put his leg in the air and kicked, hoofing the ball out of danger with a well performed volley.


Then in the 18th minute Ryane passed the ball to Khuzaymah who dribbled it into the Noremark penalty area with a burst of speed, Inkovik sent it to Khuzaymah's left with a sliding tacke that nudged the ball away from Khuzaymah. But Khuzaymah leapt over Inkovik's legs, slipped on his right foot as he landed and just managed to kick the ball. He went low, Renimasje dove for it and by luck he sandwhiched it between the ground and his armpit, then grabbed it.


In the 22nd minute Kanen passed the ball low to Aranosk who sprinted past Smithson and hit it squarely with his right foot, Liberkine stuck out his hands and managed to parry it but it fell to Aranosk once more, he hit it away from Liberkine aimed for the inside of the far post but Ryane managed to jump and stick out a foot which connected with the ball putting it out for a corner.


In the 26th minute New Propagandia had a throw-in near Noremark's Penalty area, Smithson throw it long and it landed in the middle of the box, Starr hit it with a diving header but Liberkine managed to clutch it in his hands.


There wasn't a serious chance then untill the 39th minute. New Propagandia were on the attack, it had started raining making the pitch muddy and slippery. Smithson passed the ball to Ryane who crossed it over to Starr on the left wing. Starr had Sasken blocking his way so he heeled it behind to Steele and went past Sasken, Steele chipped it over Sasken and it landed infront of Starr, Starr kicked it hard but it hit the post and bounced back, Khuzaymah picked it up outside of the box but he was taken down by a one-footed tackle by Malsen that took his left leg down instead of the ball. There was an arguement, Malsen got a yellow card and New Propagandia got a free-kick.


Coming up to the 43rd minute after quite the arguement Ryane prepared for the free-kick. He stepped back, took a deep breath in and out, the whistle blew. he took a short run up and kicked it, trying to curve it around the wall. But it failed, it bounced off of the wall. Hayden got to the ball and passed it to Khuzaymah who was on the edge of the box, he turned, hit it with his right foot on the momentum, it curved round Inkovik, Renimasje dived and stuck out a hand but didn't go far enough. The ball went in the right hand corner of the net. New Propagandia had scored!


After half time the game got scrappier as Players slipped and missed crucial chances, making them more frustrated. The foul's got rougher and more frequent. Then, after a mistake by Starr, Inkovik hoofed it down the pitch, Wilkerson chested it and passed it to Krasentor. Krasentor ran up gathering momentum, he drilled it with his right foot from 25 yards out.. It was going too high but it started to lower. Liberkine jumped but it went just above his head and into the back of the net! The crowd went silent. Noremark had scored.


After New Propagandia kicked off Reyes went solo, He darted past Kanonen, he faked left and went right getting past Inkovik, Solne was closing in and Reyes cracked it at the goal but Renimasje parried it and Solne put it out for a throw-in.


Noremark has started to take advantage of New Propagandia's desperate attempts as they launched more fierce counter-attacks. Stravik went down the wing and passed it past Smithson to get to Aranosk, Aranosk got into the box, went around Hayden, he was just about to shoot when no! Red took him out with a nasty two-footed challenge. Red was seeing Red, he thankfully didn't injure Aranosk but was handed a Red Card for his troubles. Noremark had a penalty.


New Propagandia held their breath as Wilkinson placed the ball on the spot and stepped back confidently. Liberkine rubbed his gloves together and streched his arms out, making the goal look smaller. The Referee blew his whistle. Wilkinson ran up and hit it with his left foot aiming for the bottom-left corner, Liberkine dived, he didn't have enough power but the sliperry grass sent him further, he saved it! The crowd cheered deafeningly, New Propagandia's first ever penalty was saved!


Liberkine quickly got up and kicked it as hard as he could. No-one was on the received end in Noremark's territory but Khuzaymah got there first. He was set upon by Inkovik and Solne, he had no-where to go. Then he passed it through Inkovik's legs, Starr got control of the ball, he was clear on goal! It took him a while to get there but it was Starr vs Renimasje. Starr got to the middle of it before Renimasje ran forward to close him down. Starr kicked the ball, Renimasje parried, it went in the air, Renimasje desperately tried to get to his feet, Starr hit it on the volley, Renimasje got a fingertip to it... But not enough! Starr put it in the left side of the net! The day was won!


There weren't any serious chances after that as the players were worn out. It was bitter and soggy but New Propagandia finally got a victory after walking the path of defeat.


Choobie International is next. And with the same team after that performance, surely New Propagandia can beat them!

The Daily Quak
Ne pas de Match!

The Quakmybush National Soccer Team continued their World Cup 32 qualifying run with a match in New Montreal States against the sixth best team in the world. The Sharks were clearly nervous as Boethuis broke in on Cam Carroll in the 3rd minute but Carroll made a huge save to keep the match 0-0. The save got the Sharks in gear, Cory Sorley came down the left wing and fed the ball over to John Fields who found the back of the net, 1-0 Quakmybush. The Sharks kept the momentum when Sorley made a wonderful run and took a shot that went top corner 2-0 Quakmybush. The home crowd was dead silent and shocked as the Sharks went into the half up two. Both teams came out ready to play in the second half. Andre Villeneuve took a shot from the top of the box, but the shot bounced off the bar. The Sharks counter attacked with Ryan Fret ending up with the ball near the top of the box and scoring, 3-0 Quakmybush. The Sharks were now in cruise control of the game. They added another goal towards the end of the game to make it 4-0 Quakmybush.

Quakmybush - 4
Fields 15' Sorley 36' Fret 56' 85'

New Montreal States - 0
None

The Sharks will now travel back home to face Kericia, who they defeated 3-1 last time they played. The Sharks sit 1st in their group with a six point lead over New Montreal States, and Vilita sitting in the third qualifying spot.

Goal Scorers
Fields, Sorley - 12
Graves, Fret - 3
Plett, Miller, Martin, Baker, Ralegigh - 1

Article By: Rick Juras

RP cutoff Matchday 14. ESF RP counts

Dear Diary

Sorry I haven't gotten around to updating you in the last few weeks, but with the Elune Celebrations, I was unable to free myself the time to get on the computer. Oh but the World Cup has gone on, that it has, and the Marauders pulled off quite a odd trick. They fell horribly to the Capitlst Slani side, in which the entire squad performed well below what is their usual, and then came back in the next week to stun the Aces from Krytenia with a 1 all draw. It was a splendid affiar, in which my mom played hero, knifing in a penalty in the 84th minute to give the squad the critical point. The team is going have to keep this momentum going though if they want to qualify, with two squads clear ahead of them for the third spot. However, they do have the luxury of still having matches with them, and that should do them well. I think that they team will do well, espicially with this next match against the struggling creature squad from Turori, and then push on through to get to their first ever World Cup final. We might cause some trouble for the traditional powers if we do, but that is still far off. As is my time left before I need to get on the jet, adios.

Announcer: Hi everybody, I'm Stéphane Lavoie with my favourite co-host, Jack Von Hitten.

Jack Von Hitten: Hi Stéphane. Today's loss at Dôme de Saint-François by the national team has had a bad effect. Oliverrians began to think they were unbeatable, but what we saw this afternoon was just... defense. Both teams were playing defense. Cafundéu are not so bad, but Oliverrians thought they were bad and got beaten... 1-0. Yes, Oliverry played attack as usual, but more defensively, which resulted in many goals being missed at the beginning of the game.

Stéphane Lavoie: Let's now go to the summary of the game. At the 2nd minute, Gendron passes to Hunt and Vargas saves the ball, while Hunt has to go over him to avoid an injury. 5th minute: Another chance by our national team, but... over the bar.

15th minute: Anormal, from Cafundéu, gets the ball at midfield. Check this: he goes through all Oliverrian defense, shoots, but misses the goal. What a play by the Cafundean midfield! 45th minute: Anormal gets the ball... he shoots and scores. The Oluiverrian keeper didn't see it coming. 1-0 Cafundéu.

Now to 2nd half. 2 changes by Bellemort. After, at 69th minute, Régnier gets fouled by Mercegues. From what I heard, this is supposed to be a hard tackle, but this is not hard by Oliverrian standards, because in the Première Ligue, some of the tackles are harder and are legal. Well, Mercegues got a yellow card and Régnier is now regarded as a faker.

After 90 minutes, the score was 1-0. Coach Bellemort was not happy after this game in front of a full crowd of 120,000 people. Let's listen to comments he did after the game:

"I hope a game like this will never happen again. I know Oliverrian players can do much better than this, they've proved it last cup. This result is a shame for all a nation of supporters and crazy fans. Now, let me do an historical of the nation at soccer. When I started playing it, there were about 4 clubs in Oliverry and 2000 people crowd were often what you'd get for a game. Now, there are about 60 professional clubs and crowds are over 17,000 people every game. Soccer is now as popular as hockey and football here, which is not of a little importance. And that's the first time I ever saw Oliverrians not dedicated to the game they played."

Jack Von Hitten: Pretty harsh comments uh?

Stéphane Lavoie: Yes. But, I think he is right. Players didn't play up to their potential and you see what happened today. A 1-0 loss against 104th ranked Cafundéu. But... do you think Régnier really faked an injury?

Jack Von Hitten: No. I guess he was really hurt by the foul, seeing as, even in the SALT, in which he plays with C4 Lexington FC, he is often getting hurt but still continues to play, as the Limbrogidlian kind of soccer, similar to the Oliverrian one, is kind of rough.

Stéphane Lavoie. Now, let's go to a break. After commercials, we'll be speaking of the nice win of the Marshalliston Capitals 10-3 over Saint-François. Stay tuned to SportsForum, on SportsChannel.

What a fucking joke

We knew Milchama hated us, but that was a goddamn low blow

NEW MONTREAL - 4-0? To a nation that sounds like a hardcore porno? You have GOT to be shitting us.

This is the Presse-Journal Devoir. See you next Cup.

OOC: This RP is for the Anrow match.

Being a yellow card at Az-czid matches just isn't much fun. The Gnomes almost never let us out to play and their opponents usually don't that much either. But it's much better for us than for red cards. Red Cards basically just ought to forget about showing up for Gnomes matches.

But today was not a regular match. The Pink & Green were playing Anrow, the lowest ranked team in the whole qualification. Although the Gnomes are quick and talented one thing they are not is big. So the Anrow team apparently decided they were going to rough up the gnomes and try to get them off their game.

And you have to give them credit as it actually worked fairly well. I made my first appearance just three minutes into the game when an Anrow striker made a rough tackle in the midfield on Pizelkaxrovsky. Then just 4 minutes later I was back for the other Anrow striker, who again fouled Pizelkaxrovsky. You know when both strikers pick up yellows in the first 7 minutes of the match it's not accidental, especially when it's on the same player.

Pizelkaxrovsky didn't seem that rattled so then they changed tactics and started picking on Kn-Dg. I came out four more times on borderline tackles by the Anrow players on Kn-Dg. On the occasion of the fourth foul my friend Red Card got involved as Hubertino just snapped and straight up attacked one of the Anrow players drawing a straight red and getting sent off. The Az-cz coaching staff then brought on Du-Tre for Kn-Dg moving Haji-Me into the defensive midfield.

So their dirty tactics led to Anrow being up a player and the Gnomes having to play without their best scorer. You might have thought that Anrow would give up at that point with the man advantage, but you'd be wrong. They didn't commit another foul the rest of the half, but still couldn't get anything going against the Robbers defense so when the second half came out they went right back into fouling mode. I quickly met two more Anrow players and then met one of their midfielders for a second time drawing out my friend Red Card again.

And with the match now at 10-10 Pizelkaxrovsky finally found freedom to set Stanleyinho up for the game winning goal.

After the goal Anrow gave me two more chances to come out, just for good measure. All told I met all of their players but their keeper. Quite a performance, if not in a good way.

Dear Diary,

Things repeat themselves but aren’t the same. That doesn’t make sense? Well, read on.

Our second match against Rorysville had some interesting parallels with the match earlier in the World Cup 32 qualifying series. For a start the scoreline was repeated: 3-1 in Errinundera’s favour, except, of course, the potoroos were playing at home in the Cavern.

The sole scorer for Rorysville was again the captain, Mark Schweitzer, playing from the midfield. Again, the Rory strikers were well held and again Schweitzer sold the potoroo defence a dummy and scored unexpectedly. This time, however, he scored the first goal of the match (33rd), not the last.

However, a goal was scored in the 88th minute as in that earlier match. But this time it was by a potoroo: adicksonia. In fact, it's the 2nd game in a row that he's scored in the 88th. If you remember he did this last match against Haraki. This, of course, was the third potoroo goal: rosaniel (51st) and zenoida (78th) had already hit the back of the net.

http://i55.photobucket.com/albums/g136/regnans/East%20Gippsland/Errinundera-Rorysville02.jpg

That's adicksonia after scoring his goal. The Rories weren't too happy about it. Their goalie is trying to be swallowed up by the earth.

Best afield was another Ootopian, however this time it was the inexperienced striker, zenoida, rather than the more accomplished defender, phazel, who has given the task of tagging Schweitzer and failed.

Approximately 24 years ago there must have been a surge in popularity for Voltaire’s “Candide”. zenoida is one of 3 players in the team of about that age who share a name with a character from the novel. The others are cunégonde and zirza. Who can explain these things? I wonder if the novel is any good. I must read it some time.

Anyway, zenoida is as cute as a button. Her feet are dainty and well cared for. I must admit I find them as sweet as her face. The toes are particularly attractive and I enjoy spending time on them when giving her foot massages.

http://i55.photobucket.com/albums/g136/regnans/East%20Gippsland/zenoida.jpg

She is one of a small number of potoroos I’ve got to know particularly well over the last 3 World Cup Campaigns. Foot massages can lead to that, you know. Come to think of it, I’ve got to know all the “Candide” players. Well, how about that.

zenoida is a professional footballer and has known no other employment. Her mother was a sniffer-wombat handler and her father something of a vagabond. He was last seen in autumn disappearing into the Rodger River Wilderness. No doubt, he’ll turn up again one day.

Like the Frosty Hollow match against Commerce Heights JSY, Mount Ellery was subjected to bushfires. But unlike that earlier match the game was not in any danger. The city, including the arena known as the Cavern, are underground, safe and snug while the fires burnt overhead. In any case, recent cooler and wetter weather had helped firefighters contain the blaze.

Given that Errinundera didn’t hit the lead until the 78th minute you can understand that the Mount Ellery crowd was in a state of considerable excitement for much of the match. When zenoida’s goal put the potoroos in front the roar was so loud people in the sectors above the arena (remember, Mount Ellery is a multi-level underground city) reported crockery and other loose items rattling in their homes.

Anyway, it’s now off to Demot. This is a crucial match for both teams. Errinundera is looking a likely qualifier. Demot is in 4th place in the group and no team below them has a show. The potoroos are 7 points clear but Demot must win to have any chance. They will be highly motivated.

For the record here's our goalscorers so far:
10 rosaniel
6 adicksonia
5 venu
4 lyseup
2 otelopea
1 cunégonde
1 zenoida

mckennap
Footcare specialist to the potoroos

“Hello everyone and welcome to the Presidential Coliseum where today Tynelia takes on a familiar rival in Bettia. I’m Cal Connors and with me today as he has throughout this Cup is my broadcast partner, former soccer great and member of several World Cup teams Troy Wallace. Hello again Troy.”

“Hello Cal. Got ourselves a big match today.”

“That we do Troy. Today Tynelia tries to finally get the great Bettian monkey off their backs and avenge their earlier 3-1 loss in Bettia. And it looks like we have a full house here at the Coliseum as Tynelian Towels have been brought out of hiding for the first time this Cup in large numbers.”

“Well Cal, the team is playing very well of late and now that they seem to have put their mid cup scoring drought behind them this time around people are beginning to think that maybe things will be different this time around.”

“We can certainly hope so but Bettia is top of the group and second seed in a group where we haven’t had a single big upset the whole way. How does Tynelia overcome an offensive power like Bettia Troy?”

“Well ball control will be very important Cal. If Tynelia can control the clock and limit the number of chances Bettia has at scoring then there is that much less pressure on the defense. However, Bettia is more familiar with us than any of the top teams so they have a good idea what works and what doesn’t as well as what Tynelia’s gameplan will be. I will say this though, if Bettia gets out to a lead Tynelia by nature is not much of a come from behind team with their defensive mindset.”

“The players are now coming out on the field Troy. The Bettian squad to a smattering of boos and even a few cheers as the fans here realize they will be seeing one of the best teams in the world and are showing their respect for their history.”

“This just goes to show you that Tynelian soccer fans in general know their soccer and show their respect for one of the perennial powers on the pitch.”

“And now you can tell by the sounds of the cheering that the Tynelian squad is now coming onto the field. Led by Coach Adam Billington is what many say is his final Cup. The stadium is a sea of orange and gold as the fans wave their Tynelian Towels as the team comes onto the field. So Troy what do you feel to be your keys to the match?”

“Well Cal on Bettia’s side its simple. Stick with what you do best. Bettia isn’t worried about defense because they’re always on the attack. Even if they give up a goal or two their swarming offense is sure to get it back. They’ve defeated Tynelia enough in the past to know our style of play and until Tynelia shows they can stop them there’s no need for Bettia to do anything different.

“ON the Tynelia side the key is survival. Bettia likes to get off to a fast start so surviving the initial rush is vital for Tynelia to have any chance. If they can stay within a goal at the half they will be in good shape for the second half. Most of the time Bettia has the matches locked up early so a close match might force the starters to stay on the field and give Tynelia some counterattacking opportunities. If Tynelia tries to play Bettia’s game then we will lose. Its as simple as that.”

“OK then Troy and your players to watch?”

“ON the Bettia side I have to say Gwarthen Rhydderch, their top scoring threat so the Tynelian defense will always have to keep an eye out to find where Rhydderch is on the pitch. Tynelia’s is obvious, Tom Gordman. Yeah its pretty easy to pick the keeper but if Gordman doesn’t play a great match than Tynelia will be out of this match real fast against an offense like this.”

“OK Troy we’ll have to see how this plays out as the match is about to gte underway.”

Minute 9

“Oh my, that shot by Richards had Gordman beat but he sailed it over the crossbar. Bettia is looking for an early kill here it looks like Troy.”

“Looks that way Cal, the play has been in Tynelia’s end since the start of play. Gordman’s already had to make two tricky saves and that last one was a certain goal if Richards’ shot was a little lower.”

Minute 16
“Tynelia is finally starting to put some pressure of their own Troy, a nice steal by Debbie Landers on Vaughan coming up field and the ball finally started going the other way.”

“This is a much needed breather for the defense, Bettia threw everything but the kitchen sink in the early going but it seems Gordman and company weathered that storm.Now lets see what Tynelia can do with the ball Cal.”

“Looks like Coach Billington is telling the team to slow things up a bit to give the defense some rest. Dawson and Samson are playing a bit of keep away now as they slowly move the ball towards the net.”

“I guess that makes some sense, I think the entire team is a bit surprised that this match is still scoreless.”

Minute 29
“What a save by Gordman! Ffagan got past Vhalis onside and was in alone on Gordman. However the pass was just a little too far ahead and Gormdman managed to cut the angle down before Ffagan could get the shot away and made a fine leaping catch of Ffagan’s shot.”

“Ffagan seemed to have rushed that one a bit there Cal. If he took the time to get the ball a bit more under control he might have been able to try to curl one around Gordman instead of firing it where he could still reach. Nice aggression on Gordman’s part to take the angle away though.”

“Big save here. Gordman is off to a great start today. Just what you said he needed to do Troy.”

Minute 38
“Tynelia continues to keep the pressure up now as Jakes takes a pass from Samson on the wing. The ball has been on the Bettian side for nearly five minutes now as we near the end of a still scoreless first half.”
“This has been a match of surges Cal. Bettia started off with a sustained attack, Tynelia came back briefly, Bettia took over again and now its Tynelia’s turn. Bettia’s controlled the clock so far but its still 0-0.”

“Oh there’s a miss by MacDougal as his shot sails wide of Sulaiman and out of play.”

“That was a big chance there for Tynelia but Connor overdid it on his shot.”

“Here’s the clear down field, nice header by Thompson who managed to block Scott out and send back towards the Bettian end where Dawson takes over. Looks like Jakes is breaking towards the net on the wing, Dawson sees him. JAKES IS BY HARRIS HE’S ONSIDES AND ALL ALONE! HERE’S THE SH...”

“Where’s the..? There it is Cal, penalty on Harris, tripping from behind. Is it going to be a..? YES the refs have given Jakes a penalty shot, a good call.”

“This is without a doubt Tynelia’s best chance Troy. Jakes looks to be ok from the tumble. Actually Troy I have to say this was a good penalty by Harris. Jakes could have walked in on Sulaiman but how he has to take his shot from further out.”

“Let’s see what he tries, Jakes does like the left corner on these and it looks like that’s what he’s setting up for. Here’s the kick!”

“GOOOOOOOAAAAAL! Jakes got it top left corner, Sulaiman guessed right but couldn’t reach the high, hard curler. TYNELIA LEADS 1-0!”

AET 1st Half
“Halfway through and Tynelia still has the lead 1-0. Who would have thought that Gordman would be tossing a shutout at the half Troy?”

“Not many Cal, myself included. Tynelia is very fortunate to be leading though. Bettia has the ball in Tynelia’s end for almost 28 minutes. Tynelia’s only had a handful of chances compared to Bettia but the biggest call of the match has given Tynelia a narrow lead.”

“So what do you look at in the second half Troy?”

“I don’t see Bettia changing very much, they did control the clock and had lots of good scoring chances. Tynelia’s not so much stopping Bettia as surviving. The Tynelian defense should be getting tired from all this pressure and it could just be a matter of time before Bettia wears them down and starts putting some goals up.”

“And how about Tynelia Troy, Coach Billington has to be happy with the results so far.”

“I don’t know about that Cal, I was watching Coach Billington after the goal and it looked to me he was still very concerned with the defense and is still very worried. He’s seen Bettia before as both player and Coach so he knows what they are capable of.”

“So how does Tynelia hold onto the lead then Troy?”

“Ball control Cal. Tynelia knows Bettia will keep attacking so what they have to do is keep the ball out of Bettia control. If that means the forwards and midfielders play keep away even if its in Tynelia’s end then do it. They can’t score if they don’t have the ball. On the other hand they need to look for any offensive chances they can get. One goal will not be enough to beat Bettia, so they can’t take the air out of the ball completely.”

“OK Troy, looks like the teams are heading back on the field as the crowd is still going crazy over the Tynelian lead.”

Minute 61
“This doesn’t look good. Alexander Vhalis is hobbling around after getting a cleat stuck on the turf and possibly hyperextending something in his leg. Coach Billington and the trainers are on the field with him and it looks like he’s coming out of the game. Brian Barns is taking his place giving him his first extended action in some time. Quite a place to come in wouldn’t you say Troy?”

“Yes this is a time when you want your best defenders on the field. Vhalis I still being looked at but you know they will be missing him on the field. Bettia is probably smelling blood.”

Minute 67
“Bettia is clearly picking on Barns as they push the ball up on his side of the field. Richards and Kurniawan made him look silly the first time they went at him but Stossels was there to break up the play. The second time Barns himself managed to deflect a Kurniawan pass away but now they’re bringing it at him again.”

“Its what Bettia should be doing, attacking the unknown player who isn’t up to game speed yet and take your chances. You can’t fault this in a strategic sense Cal.”


Minute 73
“Off the crossbar! Richards nearly tied this one up after beating Barns and firing one off. A sliding Jane Stossels managed to force him to try to lift his shot at the last moemnet and that’s all that saved Gordman. The rebound went right to Willis who fired it down the field to relieve the pressure of the latest Bettia surge.”

“This second half has been mostly Bettia’s again Cal. Though I thought I could see signs of frustration on Richard’s face when he missed his shot. I don’t think anyone on the Bettian end expected to be scoreless this late into the match.”
“So you think the momentum may be swinging Troy?”

“I wouldn’t go that far but it does seem like the Tynelian defense is starting to get to Bettia.”

Minute 79
“Well you knew it was going to come and you can tell by the roar from the crowd that the ‘Grand Old Man’ himself Jay Masterson is coming into the game as Alan Dawson heads over to the bench.”

“This just shows that Coach Billington knows his one goal lead may not last much longer at this rate so he’s going to try for an insurance goal with Masterson coming into the game now.”

“ Looks like a change of formation too Troy.”

“That’s nothing new either. Billington likes to swap over from a 3-2 attack to a 2-3 with Masterson on the wing and MacDougal moving to the middle and Jakes on the other side. With the ball at midfield this is the best chance to make this move. Gives Tynelia a chance to create some offense of their own. The defense must be exhausted by now Cal. They need the offense to give them a break.”

Minute 86

“Here comes Jakes on the wing, looks like he’s going to take the shot. Harris jumps up to block but Jakes just gets it by him that Suliaman leaps up and knocks it up and away. Wait a minute, Masterson charged in from the other wing and the ball is going right to him. Suliaman sees him but…GOOOOOOAAAL!!! Masterson took a header before Suliaman could get back for the save. TYNELIA’S UP 2-0 WITH TIME RUNNING OUT FOR BETTIA TROY!”

“The Old Man comes through again! Look at him getting mobbed by his teammates. Not the fastest player on the pitch anymore but Masterson still knows how to end up where the ball is. The crowd is going nuts! This could be the biggest win in Tynelian history. Bettia looks completely stunned Cal.”

“I’ve never seen the crowd this fired up in years Troy.”

“The closest thing I can think of Cal was when Amy Whiteworth took her first step on her hall of fame career when she shut out then power Nanakaland 2-0.”

“The ‘shut’em out Amy’ game, but this could be even bigger than that win.”

“Definitely Cal, Bettia is a top twenty team, way ahead of Nanakaland’s rank at the time. Let’s see if they don’t get too excited and let Bettia come right back. You know they’re going to throw everything at us now.”
“I don’t know Troy. Bettia looks beat down there. In shock more likely. Well here they go.”

AET-Final
“What a match Troy, Bettia did mount pressure again right after the Masterson goal but Tynelia was fired up and not about to let this one slip through their hands. A HUGE win here as they keep pace with Cuation who also won today.”

“Not only that but it gives us an edge now. Cuation was swept by Bettia and we split with them. Tynelia MUST beat Cuation on the road or they’re in big trouble but after today’s win I think the team is believing that this could very well be the year Cal. Bettia controled the tempo much of the match but it was Tynelia that capiltalized on their opportunities here today.”

“Look at the crowd storming onto the field now to celebrate. Gordman being carried off the field on the shoulders of his teammates as he pulled off the shutout of his career.”

“Hopefully the grounds crew will be able to get the field ready for the Dumania match here next.”

“Ah don’t worry about that Troy, enjoy the win. It took six tries but Tynelia has finally beaten Bettia to give themselves a boost in their qualification efforts! First the mid tourney scoring drought was erased, now the Bettia monkey on our backs is finally thrown off. Is qualification the next hurdle the team will finally overcome? Only five more matches to go and Tynelia’s on the outside looking in right now but the first major upset of the group should send shockwaves through the rest of the competition. Today Tynelia showed they are not going away for anyone and that no team is safe now. For Troy Wallace this is Cal Connors from a rocking Presidential Coliseum. I’ll say it one more time, today’s final Tynelia 2, Bettio 0. Good night everyone.”

Dazza: I'm Dazza "Sexpot" Dallas!
Ricky: And I'm Ricky Pointy Stick, and this is THE FOOTBALL LIFE at the World Cup 32
Dazza: Another super day in the football even if Dazza can't get on the field
Ricky: The team are doing well so don't worry Dazza.

Dazza: Your son did a great job while you were away.
Ricky: I hope he behaved himself with you
Dazza: He sorta did, but keep his hands to himself - err most of the time
Ricky: Maybe you should stop wiggling so much, Dazza.

Dazza: Firstly, the Jeruselem game. We played Sexland, seckland. Yeah!
Ricky: I think Dazza's becoming clucky with that pregnancy. That was Seckland she meant.
Dazza: And we score sex goals against them, while they scored zip. I mean SIX NIL. Kate Bush is leading the team so well and scoring goals too. And Big Gay Al did a good job to as well as few other players, but Kate was the woman of the game.
Ricky: A lot of goals and everyone is getting in on the act, and we haven't lost a game yet. Good going Kate Bush and the team. No Dazza but we are doing well still.

Dazza: Tynelia took on leader Bettia and well, actually well WON.
Ricky: Yes a might win by the Tynelian team who allowed us to take the lead in the group.
Dazza: Bettia went down TWO NIL and well, their second loss. I would not write off Bettia - they are a good team and should easily make the next round like us.
Ricky: Rivals to Tynelia wanted Bettia to win and well, this makes the race interesting indeed.

Dazza: Yes, it means the teams like Yafor 2 and Cuation are getting nervous! Beating Bettia is not easy feat.
Ricky: Cuation took on the lowly Dumania who got hammered by Jeruselem. They scraped a TWO ONE win and showed the difference between Jeruselem and the pretenders. Dumania are not doing well and expect to lose most of the time.
Dazza: Yes, but it's three more points for them and needed too when Tynelia won.
Ricky: You must beat these easy teams, can't afford to lose to them at all.

Dazza: Yafor 2 beat the cute girlies from Dorian and Sonya, only ONE NIL but it's still 3 points.
Ricky: It's over for the girls after this but Yafor 2 fight on!
Dazza: Not much of a win though, need big wins to boost goal difference in a tight race.
Ricky: In the end it could be down to goal difference, but with Jeruselem that's not an issue.

Dazza: Oh the might Lions, they are simply HOT apart from when they play Bedistan.
Ricky: Yes, another HUGE win. Bedistan maybe the big Lions but the little Lions from Nedalia are roaring too.
Dazza: Some green wombats got mauled FOUR ONE - and Nedalia look good. They should hold 2nd spot from here really - pending any disasters.
Ricky: Ah, this team of Lions look the goods! They are not Bedistan but they can sure hand out some beatings.

Dazza: YAP YAP, when I talk about well, you know.
Ricky: Not many offers for coaching the Jeruselem military football team yet
Dazza: I'm sure someone will actually apply, just let time do it's thing
Ricky: Didn't you once apply for the military?

Dazza: Me? Not me, I'm too short and too much attitude for that kind of service. That was my sister you are thinking about!
Ricky: So what happened? Why didn't get accepted?
Dazza: I think she was colour blind or something so no go there.
Ricky: Well, it turned out well then - she got a better career instead of getting shot or blown up

Dazza: Hey, why don't you try?
Ricky: Too busy training new cyclists for the Tour de Qazox
Dazza: Come on people! If you can coach a soccer team, think about this job.
Ricky: Low expections too, it isn't a World Cup team.

Dazza: That's it - from the FOOTBALL LIFE. Remember, not to miss the highlights of Jeruselem and Nedalia win as well the Bettia loss on JGN.
Ricky: And watch for Dazza have a snooze somewhere in the highlights too.
Dazza: I am eating for two you know!
Ricky: Dazza likes sleeping the job, in many ways.

Dazza: Good thing not all of it on TV!

FYI
Group 5:
Green Wombat [1] Nedalia [4]

Group 10:
Dumania [1] Cuation [2]
Dorian and Sonya [0] Yafor 2 [1]
Tynelia [2] Bettia [0]
Seckland [0] Jeruselem [6]

"So, Norman, has panic set in yet?"

"No."

"It looked as if there were problems out there...Lawrence and Bassett did not seem to be getting on..."

"They were."

"And there were recriminations following the Mushroom goal...Robinson and Guthrie almost coming to blows..."

"Team spirit."

"Two defeats on the trot...are you concerned?"

"No."

"What are your plans for the next match?"

"They're secret."

"Qazox losing to Ariddia...that must have been a relief."

"Meh."

"Lisburn Mateys won again...they're closing the gap..."

"So?"

"...well, you had a big lead in third place, and it's being whittled away..."

"So?"

"...er..."

"Thank you."

VERY FRUSTRATING RESULT FOR CAFUNDÉU

http://img.terra.com.br/i/2006/03/30/325068-2795-ga.jpg http://img.terra.com.br/i/2006/03/30/325067-0174-ga.jpg
Rain made the game more difficult

It wasn’t the result that we were expecting. Surely. After defeating The Mice of Miceland and Oliverry and with a good advantage over Spaam, Cafundéu couldn’t defeat the weak National Team of The Deathbat Republic playing away. The attack didn’t score goals and the game ended in a goalless draw, frustrating all Cafundéu’s supporters. In a horrible game, with few goal chances and many mistakes, Cafundéu had to see Spaam recovering the two points of difference that they lost after drawing with Andossa Se Mitrin Vega.

The result makes Cafundéu stay in the third position, but now only five points in front of Spaam. The next game of the country will be at home against Andossa Se Mitrin Vega. All the supporters know that not winning this game can result in a crisis that can make the team lose the place in the World Cup, so they are very worried. But the players and the staff seem ready to face all the difficulties of these last five games against Andossa(at home), Spaam(at home), Salwinia(away), The Lowland Clans(away) and Backwardistan(at home).

THE GAME
Cafundéu started the game trying to attack and score a goal fast, and The Deathbat Republic played a balanced game trying to attack in the best time. Soon Cafundéu reached the attack, but the midfielders and the strikers couldn’t finish well and all the plays that they created were poor. The team wasn’t performing well. 3rd minute: Kliek received the ball in the left side of the field and invaded the area, passing the ball to Ganz Ijak inside the area. The attacker shot, but the goalkeeper made an excellent save.

7th minute: Another opportunity for Cafundéu. This time, the right-back Vandick came from the defense and passed to Priotto. The defensive midfielder was able to dribble an opponent, but didn’t invade the area and tried to score shooting from outside the area. The shot wasn’t very good and the opponent goalkeeper didn’t have difficulties to save. 10th minute: First counterattack of The Deathbat Republic. The ball was lost in the midfield and an attacker received it. He shot, but sent the ball over the bar.

15th minute: Ray Kirs tackled an attacker and started to run from the defense. He reached the midifeld and made a fast pass to Anormal, who knocked out an opponent and reached the attack. He crossed to the area, but the crossing was horrible and a defender could head it. Brahma took the rebound and shot to the goal, but he sent the ball wide. 19th minute: A defender of The Deathbat Republic took the ball from Heitor, who replied fouling the defender. Bozo showed him the yellow card.

24th minute: Anormal received the ball in the midfield and passed to Kliek, who couldn’t dominate the ball and lost it to the opponent. The home team started a counterattack, and the ball soon reached one of the attackers, who found an open space to shot. His shot wasn’t bad, but the goalkeeper Julio Vargas could save it easily. 27th minute: Priotto sent the ball to the attack. Heitor got it and invaded the area, but lost the ball to a defender. The coach Franz Braddock started to shout with his players.

30th minute: This time, Anormal passed the ball to the midfielder Kliek , who battled for the ball with an opponent and won the ball. Later, he passed the ball to Ganz Ijak. The pass wasn’t so good, so the attacker had difficulties to control the ball, but he could dribble a defender. Ganz shot to the goal, but the goalkeeper made a good save. 33rd minute: Kliek and Heitor made a confusion near the area, that ended when Heitor was fouled by one of the defenders. Yellow card to him.

http://img.terra.com.br/i/2006/03/30/325060-1543-ga.jpg
Some fouls were seen in the game

35th minute: Good chance for The Deathbat Republic, as the midfield of the visitor team made a mistake and a player of the home team could get the ball. He reached the attack and crossed the ball to the area. Cafundéu’s defenders, Becão and Sávio Ferrari, weren’t able to get the ball and an attacker could head it to the goal, but he sent the ball over the bar, missing a good goal chance. 36th minute: Cafundéu tried to start a counterattack with Ray Kirs, but he was fouled by an opponent midfielder, who received the yellow card.

40th minute: The last good chance of the first half started with Brahma, who received the ball from Vandick and reached the entrance of the area. He decided to pass the ball to Ganz Ijak, who was being marked by two defenders. Ganz Ijak could receive the ball and dribble one defender, but couldn’t dribble the second and lost the ball. Anormal took the rebound and shot with strength, but the goalkeeper made a fantastic save, even holding the ball which came very fast to his hands.

45th minute: The Deathbat Republic tried to start a counterattack, but Anormal took the ball before an attacker could receive it. The first half ended, and was clear that the white team(Cafundéu, using the third kit again) wasn’t satisfied and were expecting to hear many bad things from their coach Franz Braddock, and many changes would probably be made. The Deathbat Republic players were hoping to have a better second half and maybe even win the game.

The coach Franz Braddock returned to the game with an angry face and announced two changes in the team. Kliek and Heitor left the game and the attackers Ernesto(called Heren in his hometown) Ijak and Incisivo entered in their places. A curious fact is that the substituted players didn’t even returned to see the remaining of the game in the bench. The Deathbat Republic made changes in the team too. The second half started, and like the first, many mistakes made from both teams.

1st minute: The first chance was for The Deathbat Republic, that started the game trying to score a goal and get a good victory. A midfielder passed the ball fast to a winger and received the ball back in the entrance of the area. He shot the ball to the goal, obligating Vargas to make a very good save. 5th minute: Brahma received the ball from Priotto and saw the attackers inside the area. He crossed the ball and Ganz Ijak headed it, but the goalkeeeper made a good save.

10th minute: Becão tackled an opponent and passed the ball to Anormal, who ran over a defender and was near to the attack. He passed the ball to Incisivo, who entered in the area and shot. The ball passed through the area and nobody hit it. Ernesto Ijak had a great chance to score as he was very close from the ball, but he missed it. The coach became more angry. 14th minute: Priotto lost the ball in the midfield and an attacker received it near the goal. He shot, but missed the goal and sent the ball wide.

http://img.terra.com.br/i/2006/03/30/325057-5656-ga.jpg
Both teams couldn't reach the attack

The coach Franz Braddock started to shout more and more with his players and started to complain with everybody, clearly desperated. He decided to put the attacking midfielder Hauser in Priotto’s place. 18th minute: Hauser created a good chance after receiving the ball from Ray Kirs. He passed to Ernesto Ijak, who had difficulties to invade the area and lost the ball. After some minutes, it started to rain, what make the game even more difficult, as the rain was very strong.

21st minute: Hauser passed the ball to Incisivo, who dribbled an opponent defender and invaded the area, falling on the ground. He asked for a penalty, but the referee ignored him. The coach Franz Braddock started to shout like a crazy man, and invaded the field. The referee said that he must return to his bench, so he returned. 25th minutes: A winger of the home team made a good play in the left side of the field and crossed the ball to the area. An attacker headed it and the ball hit the ground and after that the post, before leaving the playing field.

28th minute: A midifelder of The Deathbat Republic lost the ball after a passing mistake and Brahma got it. He passed the ball to Incisivo who made a fast pass to Ernesto Ijak, who fell on the ground. It clearly wasn’t a penalty, as Ernesto dived like he was going to a swimming pool. He received the yellow card. After this play, the coach Franz Braddock invaded the field again to talk to the referee. This time, the referee was as angry as the coach and sent him off.

33rd minute: Brahma fouled an attacker of The Deathbat Republic and received a yellow card. One of the midfielders took the free kick and obligated Vargas to make a good save, as the ball got an effect and made a interesting curve. 37th minute: A winger of The Deathbat Republic dribbled three players before shooting to the goal. His shot was good, but he missed the goal and sent the ball wide. The game was reaching its end and the players started to run less, as the rain difficulted the game.

40th minute: Sávio Ferrari was in the midfield when he received the pass from Ray Kirs. He is a defender, so he decided to pass the ball to Incisivo. The attacker reached the entrance of the area and shot from there, missing the goal. 45th minute: Fast counterattack for the home team, but the attacker couldn’t control the ball well and lost it to Becão, who shot the ball to the attack. Then, the game ended with the 0x0 result and both teams started to think about their next games.

After the game, the referee Pancrácio Bozo said: “That coach(Braddock) is crazy! It was clear that in both cases weren’t penalties, and he complains everytime! I had to make him leave the game. I hope that he stops doing this just because his team didn’t win!” Cafundéu’s captain Vargas said to the press: “Our attack was far from good today, so we didn’t win the game. But there are more five games and maybe we can play these ones better.” Attacker Ernesto Ijak said: “The game Andossa Se Mitrin Vega is very important, so we can’t get a bad result in this one. Let’s hope.”

The coach Franz Braddock decided to talk with the media after the game: “Sorry for what I did in the game, I was angry and couldn’t control myself. I really apologize. I shouldn’t invade the field during the game, but this is my style. I couldn’t believe that, after defeating the fourth best team of the world, we couldn’t defeat one of the worst ranked teams of the world. Now I must admit that this game was very bad for us and even that our opponent was closer to the victory than us, although both were far away from it. Now I must prepare the formation for the game against Andossa. It’s good to return home after two games playing away, and maybe we can have more luck with our supporters.”

http://img.terra.com.br/i/2006/03/30/325056-0803-ga.jpg
The teams had few opportunities even before the rain

THE DEATHBAT REPUBLIC 0x0 CAFUNDÉU

Place: unknown stadium, in The Deathbat Republic.
Attendance: unknown.
Referee: Pancrácio Bozo.
Man of the Match: a winger(The Deathbat Repubic).

http://spaam.mrdrake.net/flags/the_deathbat_republic.png THE DEATHBAT REPUBLIC: no team released.

http://spaam.mrdrake.net/flags/cafundeu.png CAFUNDÉU: Vargas, Vandick, Kirs, Becão and Sávio Ferrari; Anormal, Priotto(Hauser), Brahma and Kliek(Incisivo); Heitor(Ernesto Ijak) and Ganz Ijak.
Coach: Franz Braddock.

Ratings:
7- Vargas, Becão and Sávio Ferrari.
6- Vandick and Anormal.
5- Kirs, Priotto, Hauser, Brahma and Ganz Ijak.
4- Incisivo and Heitor.
3- Ernesto Ijak and Kliek.

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Cafundéu – next game’s formation: Vargas, Vandick, Kirs, Becão and Sávio Ferrari; Anormal, Priotto, Brahma and Kliek; Ernesto Ijak and Ganz Ijak.
Style of +2

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Goalscorers after 11 games:
6- Ganz Ijak
3- Heitor and Anormal
1- Kirs, Brahma and Becão

Samantha Neesa giggles. She’s wearing a Fort Europe home jersey, scarf and beanie.

“Hello fans of Assegai football! I’m Assegai Developments forward Samantha Neesa, reporting live from Northern Caesarea, where tonight, my teammates and I traveled with our regional brothers and sisters from Fort Europe to support them from the stands. Too bad they lost. By the way, in case you’re wondering, Mikaela Eyre got the day off.

“We had the day off, too, but we didn’t just sit around, and spent parts of last week training in preparation for out game with Florida Oranges. The last couple of days we trained with Fort Europe, which was a lot of fun.”

Samantha turns to her left to Fort Europe’s Josephine Blanchard and Karl Isaak.

“Josephine, this was a tough loss away from home. How’s the team taking it?” Samantha asks her.

Josephine stares off into space for a few moments.

“Oh... sorry,” she says snapping to attention. “Was scavenging for food in the team bus. Nothing so much as a crumb in the bus...or within 20 miles.”

Samantha and Karl stare at her.

“Huh? Uh... well. How does the team feel with their first NationStates World Cup experience?” she asks Josephine.

“Oh, I see... Well, the best I can do is give you is a quick outline. Then, I really must go and get some fee inside me or I’ll never sleep tonight,” she blurts out. “I wonder if the local pub sells crips.”

“What?” Samantha giggles. She turns to Karl. “What was it like having the support of Assegai in the stands tonight?”

Karl laughs. “Sorry, mate. I really must be going,” he says smelling his armpits. “I’ll be back in an hour or so.”

Samantha giggles. “Well, I can speak for my teammates and say that we had a great time supporting Fort Europe. They even gave us Fort Europe gear, which we wore tonight.”

She walks over to a group of her teammates, who are standing nearby. They all begin to clap for her. She takes a bow and approaches Assegai team captain Ashley Riot.

“Hey, Ashley, coming off that huge win over Lisburn Mateys, we took care of Stromboland. Do you think we can keep it going against Florida Oranges?” she asks him.

“Playing at home against Florida Oranges, I think we have a great shot of defeating them,” he says. “The win over Lisburn Mateys has breathed life into our World Cup qualifying possibilities and I think that a win over Florida Oranges is another step in the right direction.”

“Gee, Ashley, you’re always so serious,” she says, giving him a thwap upside the head. “Even when we got you drunk, all you could talk about was strategy and long-ball football.”

Ashley laughs. “Sammie, you’re a nut,” he says with a chortle.

“Well, let me get my soul sister, Callo in here,” she says moving over to Assegai backup keeper Callo Merlose.

“Hey, Sammie!” she says, giving her a very tight hug.

“Okay boys, we know you like when we give each other boob hugs, but must you drool?” says Samantha, giggling. The guys on the team laugh. “Callo, this is the first time in your career, since you were a rookie on the national squad that you’ve had to watch the game from the bench, how are you dealing?”

“Most of the time, I’m cheering for Edward; I think he’s done a fantastic job,” she says. “He’s hot right now, but I know that at any given moment, the team might turn to me, so I keep myself busy, training with him and doing my own little things at home and at the gym.”

“What’d you think of Northern Caesarea?” she asks.

“Although Fort Europe is a newcomer to the NationStates World Cup, I really thought they were going to beat Northern Caesarea tonight,” Callo responds. “I think Fort Europe has a much stronger team and, as you saw, they’re very hungry!” she says laughing.

“Well, it’s time we started heading to the local pubs,” Samantha says. “We have a long week ahead of in preparation for the Florida Oranges game so we’re going to enjoy our stay in Northern Caesarea with the Fort Europe squad.”

I love being the dressing room for Slimes Stadium. A lot of huge -League matches have occurred and some big qualifier matches and a number of concerts, so I've seen a lot of famous people and witnessed some pretty amazing events, but today was a first for me and the people of Az-cz. You see this was the first time that the Gnomes clinched a world cup spot on their home soil.

Before the match the Gnomes were aware that with the right occurences they could clinch their qualification spot, but they weren't really thinking about it.
Coach Khim gave a nice speech before going out on the pitch. He apparently has been researching his Az-czid legends, because he told a story about Az-cz and his gang of friends slaying the evil faeries of Az-cz's original homeland. Something about how they were rather easy to kill but could curse you which was a huge danger. Then they compared Sel Appa to the faeries. In that we ought to beat them but if we weren't careful they'd get us. Well some of the players understood and some couldn't figure out what the hell Khim was talking about, especially through his accent.

The people who remained in the locker room had the TV on to watch the match and things did not start out well for the Gnomes. Sel Appa scored two early goals and put a damper in the mood of Az-czid fans. Pizelkaxrovsky pulled off one of his fabulous free kicks to pull a goal back, but the Sel Appans answered and held the lead at 3-1.

When they came in at the half Hubertino was pissed. He couldn't believe it. He yelled at all the players and reminded them not to let the Sel Appans push them around. And that even though he wasn't out there it oughtn't make a difference. He was especially displeased by the midfielders and really unloaded on them. None of the coaches said anything, and they didn't make any tactical changes, but the match was entirely different in the second half.

The midfielders looked great. Lo-Ro stepped up his defense to stunt any Sel Appan attacks and Pizelkaxrovsky and Kn-Dg went to work. Kn-Dg scored the first goal off a rebounded from Stanleyinho. Pizelkaxrovsky headed home Kn-Dg's cross to tie the game, then returned the favor 9 minutes later to put the Gnomes up for good, with what would turn out to be the winning goal.

Right at the 30 minute mark of the second half Lo-Ro added the fifth on a nice rocket shot from distance. The coaches then brought on At-Zm for defense in place of Kn-Dg, pushing Haji-Me forward, and the Sel Appans simply couldn't breakthrough.

They then waited to hear the results of the other matches. Algal States had of course lost at Liverpool England but when word filtered back that Cataduanes had lost at home to Qutar and that the Gnomes were the first team to secure a trip to the MilFried world cup they were ecstatic. Champagne soon followed and the rough housing was on. Surely similar events were happening around Az-cz to celebrate the Gnomes excellent run. Amazingly with five matches left they were in.

QAZOXIAN TIMES

Its all but over now as Qazox lost another 2 goal lead to Ariddia. Stefany Heisel continued her great paly scoring twice again, but Ariddia's attack was too strong and they withstood a late attack by Qazox to hold on to the 3-2 win.

Up next for Qazox is a trip to Lisburn Mateys, who knocked off Qazox earlier 2-1. For any momentum heading into the Cup of Harmony, Qazox need to win, but the way they've played so far, who knows what the score will be.


Game Summary:
Goals:
Qazox: Heisel (10,11) 35', 56'
Ariddia: 63', 72', 81'
Cards:
Qazox: Yellow: Holmes 15'
Ariddia: Yellow: Ke Sho 17'

Amda-Mo: Well that was a very nice comeback win for the Gnomes, defeating Sel Appa 5-3.

Lur-Mn: I have to congratulate my mates. To be the first team to qualify for a world cup is just amazing. Yes it's in large part due to the struggles of most of the group, but it's still an incredible accomplishment.

Amda-Mo: So how did they come back in today's game?

Lur-Mn: It's hard to say really. They weren't playing well in the first half, but when they came out after the break they really took over and end up winning comfortably.

Amda-Mo: How does the team stay focused from now?

Lur-Mn: Well there's still a lot to play for. The exact procedure hasn't been announced yet, but it's quite likely that the finish in the standings will affect the seeding for the cup. Plus the prestige that comes along with a better finish. And of course we want to up our KpB ranking, which is affected by qualification performance. So they're not just going to pack it in.

Amda-Mo: Do you think the coaches will experiment with different formations?

Lur-Mn: Absolutely. And they should. We're not locked into the 23 we're currently carrying and if there are other good players we should take advantage.

Amda-Mo: Looking ahead, our next match is against Algal States. What do you see in store for that match?

Lur-Mn: I think we'll come out slowly but I think we're just too good and playing too well not to win that match. Plus this is a team that gave us trouble last time and I think we want the home win against them. Az-cz 4 Algal States 1

Amda-Mo: Alright. Congratulations again to the team, and good luck trying to secure higher spots.

Mikaela Eyre smiles.

“A good afternoon to you and yours, wherever you may be. This is Mikaela Eyre reporting live from the Assegai Developments National Team Training Facility adjacent to Cathedral Park, where tonight the Riskbreakers will play host to Florida Oranges in their next NationStates World Cup XXXII qualifier.”

She steps to the side. Assegai keeper Callo Merlose is standing there with her jet black hair tied back in a ponytail, wearing a white Assegai Developments National Team sports bra and aqua team shorts.

“Callo is here with me today because it has just been announced that she and several other players will start in place of starters who have come down with the flu,” she says. “Callo, just a week ago, you were saying that you’ve been training hard just in case you were needed. With Edward van de Beauchamp out with the flu, you’ve been given the nod for the Florida Oranges game. What are your thoughts?”

Callo smiles tight-lipped. “Well, I had really hoped that I would have earned back my old spot on the starting squad, but, with Edward out with the flu, I’m going to step in and do my best to preserve the sanctity of our net tonight. We still don’t know much about that mysterious team—Florida Oranges—and I can’t take anyone for granted because other teams have done that to us and we made them pay.”

Mikaela nods. “Other players out with the flu include forward Sidney Losstarot, midfielder Agatha Denys, and defenders A.J. Durai and John Müllenkamp. They’ll be replaced by forward Stephen de Cobham, who gets his first official National Team start, midfielder Duane Grissom, and defenders Stephen Maison and Elizabeth Fenton, both also making their first National Team starts. With so many young players in there, do you think this will have a negative affect on the team’s performance?”

“Certainly, not,” responds Callo. “These are players that were pulled out of a large pool of potential football stars and they have earned their spots on the team. If we didn’t believe they belonged on the field, they wouldn’t even be on the roster in the first place. That said, I expect us to play a higher-paced game. It’s a great opportunity for those making their first National Team starts to get experience against an opponent like Florida Oranges, for whom we have a lot of respect.”

“Any predictions for tonight’s game? Maybe a shutout?” asks Mikaela.

“Like I said, we have a lot of respect for Florida Oranges and we can’t take them lightly,” says Callo. “I can predict that Florida Oranges will be on that field to win, though. And, so will us.”

“Well, thanks for your comments today, Callo. Have a great game,” says Mikaela patting her back.

Callo gives her a hug. “Thanks, Mikaela.” Callo waves at the camera.

“Fans, remember to catch the game on the Assegai Sports Network tonight, and, before we leave you, here’s a graphic with tonight’s starting roster. We’ll see you after the game!”

Assegai Roster vs. Florida Oranges

Goaltender
#3 Callo Merlose - 23 (Char Sara Inferno, Elves Security Forces)

Defenders
#22 Jan Rosencrantz - 22 (Ascama United, Fort Europe)
#70 Barnard Mallowburne – 29 (S.C. Vagrant Hills)
#2 Stephen Maison – 19 (Assegai Developments F.C.)
#6 Elizabeth Fenton – 21 (A.C. Leá Monde)

Midfielders
#31 Alys Spicer – 20 (Matata Wanderers, Fort Europe)
#10 Ashley Riot (C) – 24 (Assegai Developments F.C.)
#45 Duane Grissom – 18 (A.C. Leá Monde)

Forwards
#5 Severus Snape – 19 (F.C. Capri, Elves Security Forces)
#20 Samantha Neesa – 18 (Char Sara Inferno, Elves Security Forces)
#18 Stephen de Cobham – 19 (D.S. Assegai)

http://spaam.mrdrake.net/flags/assegai_developments.png Assegai Developments
vs.
http://spaam.mrdrake.net/flags/florida_oranges.png Florida Oranges
@ Cathedral Park – Leá Monde, Valendia.

The Daily Quak
Qualification Almost Guarenteed

The Quakmybush National Soccer team continued their World Cup 32 qualifying run against Kericia. The Home Crowd was ecstatic as the Sharks came out to the field. The Sharks came out ready to play. Jon Fields, came down the left wing and fired a shot that hit the crossbar. Then, in the 15th minute Ryan Fret found himself all alone at the top of the box. He found the back of the net to make it 1-0 Quakmybush. A bad pass by Bob Hughes ended up with a chance for Kericia, however Cam Carroll made a huge save. The Sharks went into the half with a 1-0 lead. The Sharks came out in the second half very slowly, the team did not register a shot until the 78th minute, however, Cory Sorley did find the back of the net to make it 2-0 Quakmybush. This is how the game ended.

Quakmybush - 2
Fret 15' Sorley 78'

Kericia - 0
None

Now, I may not be a total soccer expert, but, the Sharks have only allowed six goals is quite a feat. The team has not allowed a goal since their fourth match. The team will now try to avenge their only loss of the qualifying campaign so far as they will face Dance 2 Revolution.

Goal Scorers
Sorley - 13
Fields - 12
Fret - 4
Graves - 3
Plett, Miller, Martin, Baker, Ralegigh - 1

Article By: Rick Juras

Dear Diary

What a very heartbreaking affair that was. I was balling by the final whistle. I just can't believe we lost to Turori. The conditions were perfect for us to make a jump in the table, and bam, we falter just a little, and now our qualification hopes are diminishing. Oh how fate is strange, quite very strange. At least the squads in front of the Marauders were unable to advance themselves, and now the team gets to take on the Alasdair I Frosticus squad. A win here, and the team is right back in it, with only the match in Ropa-Topia looking dangerous for the Marauders. Bostopia might be a problem, but the match is in the ESF, so I have less fear for a defeat there.

As for this disaster in Turori, it was a wretched thing. We started out of the gate well, with mom getting two shots on target in the first five minutes. Oh but those wacky creatures were up to the task. I swear, there should be a law against those things participating, maybe the ESC should file a complaint about it. Well then poor Marsha got ran over by one of them in the 20th minute, and she was writhing in pain out on the pitch, but those dumb creatures didn't politely knock the ball out of play, and instead took a shot on goal as Martin went to see if Marsha was ok. Well the ball went into the empty net, and despite the protests from Zacharius, the ref upheld the goal. Poor Marsha had to be helped off the field and was soon replaced by Dorian Sonja. Well the testy redhead was quick to take out her frustration of the Marsha injury, she bull rushed the Turori keeper, and bit its' leg! Well logically, the ref sent her off, and the squad was down to just 10, but they proved strong and kept the scoreline the same going into half.

The team was able to overcome their numerical problems early in the second half, when Nikali Rikard, who came in for Tobias, sent a dangerous low cross that found its' way to my dads foot, and into the back of the net. Well, those blasted creatures took the restart all the way back and put it past an exposed Martin. The squad threw everything at the cocabos for those last twenty minutes, but they just couldn't get another goal past their keeper. To make matters worse, Marsha's ankle is sprained and Justinian has the flu. Dorian Sonja and Samuel Tatum will be taking their place for the next match. I hope Dorian's lack of expierence doesn't hurt the squad as they fight for the chance to make it to the Proper.

Kiso Night

Hello Netizens,

where has the sekhikablog been? well, I was abducted by aliens... nah, I was working in deep selekistan and had no net... nah, you'd not believe me that as well. Okay, I tell you the truth... I was in hospital. and gloat ahead if I tell you why: I was at the atakele in Sijitalatirikimidateme (see, the selekistan story is not totally false), where I asked the lexesama-oracle about my future. This Xkora fan was standing behind me and it (I refuse to see it as human being) asked: "good news, letekaka?" (which means foreigner) I looked to this fan dressed up in xkora-colors, wearing a scarf with seleken letters and said in my best seleken: "Xkora relegates!" (yes, my best seleken is not good enough to use a future tense). Well, it did not react too positively to that. when it himself wanted to step to the wheel, I asked: "you want to know how they can avoid bankruptcy?" Well, let's say it resorted to violence then. Humorless kemxi!

So what have I seen about the match? Nothing. Sorry thing? yeah, of course. I mean, I am the sekhikablogger and miss a match of the national team, how amateurish is that? I however saw the match on video and must say that I am sorry and glad at the same time to have missed it. Sorry because I like close matches and this match was really close. And glad, well, because I do not like if the Orange-Blues make a must-win match a closed affair. My aesthetic principles say: "great, this is exciting!", my patriotism replies: "F*ck off, I just want the Junis-Omeh'ny to win!" I know that about everything that can be said has been said, so I will keep it concise: Utiu'he, you are CRAP! I have seen many crappy goalies, but no worse one wearing the national dress. Kii'he, less hume, more training! Ralaseletikivenemaratede'he, shame on you for being seleken!

Hello Netizens,

this is your fav'rite blogger again and I left selekistan for the X-Ly territory... it's worse than the selekistan, because it lacks a decent nickname! one thing however I need to say about tani ly, it has a decent soccer. I watched some matches live this weekend and I can only hope that Hsam Nje Ty manages to promote out of obscurity. if anyone of importance reads this blog: have an eye on Han Tje-Mhi. He's a good winger, that much is clear. There was just one ly in the national team so far: Viskore Il-Ne. For some reason, which had to do more with my job than with anything else, I ended up watching a H9SR match in the Ly as well. Hsin Mi Ja~o Te~l defeated Vja Il-Tie Mu~r 7:1. Why I am telling you this? because I want to use it as analogy. Vja Il-Tie Mu~r did not give up. Never! They were trailing 0:7 and just kept the hetaki up. In the end, they made the Jxo Go-Ljie (consolation goal) and celebrated it like a victory. Exactly that was what I missed in the match against Paleoslavia. Of course, it was not our Orange-Blues, which just surrenderred, but still. the Paleoslavic team reacted to the loss by reverting to a painfully karelan style of playing. And they were not even _good_ at it. If they at least were the proverbial Wall Of Karela, that would have had style. This match however was not really a good thing to watch, even though the Orange-Blues had no problem scoring against the ancient Slavic team. I would like to send them the country-song, I was listening to a while ago¹, but they would not get the message, I guess.

What can I say about this match? Xiaela Serena was a disappointment. yes, it was very hard to disappoint in this match, but he did so. He managed to mis-pass a few times too often. Syku I Kama did even less in this game, but that was not his fault. there was nothing to do for the goalkeeper. A few passes back to the defenders, that was all. Linux Aseru was my favorite player this match!²

¹ I am referring to the Allanean country singer Mersedejataqe and the song "Philosophy". The passage in question is "but you won't see me glooming 'round without a hidden smile / and if I have to do a thing, I do it quite in style".

² Every player who scores a hetrika is my favorite player, I guess (unless someone else scores more often)

Turtles lose to Az-cz 5-3

Bob: "Good evening. Thanks for coming."

Estevez: "Oh no problem."

Bob: "Well first off, how did you react to the Az-cz match yesterday?"

Estevez: "It was good, jsut about what I expected. We did a bit better than I thought, and I was surprised with our early lead."

Bob: "And how do you think the team is doing overall for the qualifiers?"

Estevez: "Very good actually, but I'm not at all surprised. The first two times were just the beginning. We're a good veteran team that just needed to be broken in. I think we have a fairly good chance to qualify. I'm not sure if I'd bet on it, but it's a fairly good chance."

Bob: "The odds are pretty good though, you must admit. We have never done this well."

Estevez: "It was partly because of who was in our group, we usually had some good teams and we were less confident the previous times."

Bob: "Qutar is proving to be a bit tough, what do you think about them?"

Estevez: "They are definitely a good team, and about equal with us in group, it seems. We've been trading places for most of the qualifiers. I honestly think our match with them will ultimately make the decision and I think we can do it. The Coach is also hoping to pick a win off of Liverpool England, but none of us are too confident."

Bob: "They are a tough, well-balanced team. You play Anrow next, how will that go?"

Estevez: "Anrow has had really bad luck, but did manage to eke out two draws, which surprised a lot of people. I'm very confident we can beat them and I'm hping we pick up a few goals to balance out our losses. The negative goal difference might be what keeps us behind Qutar in the end."

Bob: "Do you have anything to say about the other matches left?"

Estevez: "Sure. For Okielahoma, its up in the air. For Algal States, I think we'll win. We just need to win 3 and draw two. A loss to anyone now would not eb very good. We can probably absorb one loss, but two would need a miracle to keep Qutar back."

Bob: "Well thanks again for the interview. Good luck in your next match."

Estevez: "Thank you. It was a pleasure to talk. Usually people just want a photo or my autograph, which I don't mind, but it gets to you."

Bob: "I think I understand."


Bob: "Well that wraps it up for this interview with Estevez, the captain of Sel Appa's football team in the NS World Cup. The Turtles are doing quite nicely, and are battling Qutar for the third-place qualifying spot. It may come down to the match between the two. Many are hoping and betting that Sel Appa will finally have its chance. And even if we don't break the first round, just getting there is enough for all of us. And even if the Turtles get just top non-qualifying position, that will bode well for the Cup of Harmony. Home against Anrow is next up for the qualifiers. Most sources predict a good win. In mor elocal news, Anila City beat the Natives 2-1 and the Anvorbuod Rebels are facing trouble with their coach, manger, and owner all arrested on charges of bribery and racketeering. In other sports news..."

RP cutoff Match day 15

Go Cubs! Long Live Skanderbeg!

Long Live Skanderbeg!

I did not give you liberty, I found it here among you!

QAZOXIAN TIMES

Well we got one of our losses back as Qazox went into Lisburn Mateys and ripped them up 4-1. Kyle Horton tied a Qazoxian record with an amazing four goals, three in the 2nd half to blow the match wide open. LM's Niel Livingston's goal in the 33rd minute tied it at 1 after Horton's goal in the 21st minute.

But Horton couldn't be stopped in the 2nd half as he scored in the 57th, 68th and in the 1st minute of injury time to finish off the Mateys.

Up next for Qazox is a trip to Wentland, where Qazox loos to avenge a 3-2 home loss, and a loss to Wentland in the most recent Women's World Cup.

Game Summary:
Goals:
Qazox: Horton (7,8,9,10) 21', 57', 68', 91'
Lisburn Mateys: Niel Livingston 33'
Cards:
NONE

David was walking down the hall of the CSA headquarters. Something was wrong, he noted. He said hello to cheery interns as they walked down the hall, happily completing their work. Coffee consumption was down, and the locksmith or glass-repairman didn't need to be called in weeks.

Something was very wrong.

In the break room, the TV was off and the room was incredably clean, the fort built out of an old tarp and chairs dismantled. Even all the chairs were pushed in. The coffeepot was full, and the camera positioned for coffeepot survalence was actually pointing towards the pot and not towards an intern's exposed posterior.

Continuing down the hall, the rules committee were having a thrilling meeting where they were unanimously agreeing to keep everything the way it was and go back towards international rules. It was so bizzare as to be disgusting.

Suddenly, a scream of "GODDAMNIT!" focused his attention like a laser. Jerking his head up, he smashed his head against the bottom of his desk and rubbed his eyes. "Shit." he mumbled, rubbing his eyes. Looking around, the dark confines of the space under his desk were a welcoming view. Kicking his office chair out of the way, he stuck his head up and saw Maria standing at his doorway, pissed. "I told you to be careful! That's the second time this month!" She said to an intern, who was staring at a broken window in the wallway. Turning, she rubbed her head. "We're out of coffee, the coach is threatening to dismember the team after a 5-1 loss to Spruitland, and the Four-A Teams just agreed to push for three gaurenteed postseason games." she said, sinking into a chair. "And an intern broke the secretary's window. How was your nap?"

"Ugh, I had a bizzare nightmare."

Dear Diary,

What a remarkable place is Demot. Before visiting I did the usual thing and checked them out on the web. They don’t have their own page but the NationStates UN page gives them quite a good rap. I’ve been half looking forward to seeing one of their black dragons. A real dragon. Imagine that.

I had to check their Utopia score according to the University of the Global Environment in Goongerah. 73! That’s one of the best I’ve ever seen. Woohoo, a C.L.US. (Country Like US), but not as good, of course. Am I biased? Never.

There was one shock when we arrived, however. The place is military mad. Why? Why? Why? Spoiling such an otherwise beautiful country. Care for your dragons, not your armies.

Despite the warmongering the Demotians were marvellous hosts. Having heard about our advanced genetic research, they were keen to show us their latest breakthrough – their scientists have recently cloned the long-extinct feather-bellied black dragon. This is most odd. Our scientists some time ago cloned the long-extinct feather-bellied long-footed potoroo. What a coincidence. They had a good chuckle when we told them about our problems with genetically engineered giant two-headed leeches.

Prior to the match the entire team and its entourage were taken to a secure lookout where we were able to watch the mating rituals of their black dragons. Awesome!

The match itself was a corker. The potoroo defence let in goals in the last minute of both halves. What a difference that made. The final result was 3-all which was disappointing really – we see ourselves as better than the Demotians. Then again, you’re only as good as your last score. 5 of the 6 goals were scored in the second half. Here is the full list:

1st half
Ysman – Demot (45)

2nd half
lyseup – Errinundera (47)
venu – Errinundera (54)
Frontson – Demot (57)
rosaniel – Errinundera (74)
Ysman – Demot (90)

I think Sarah Ysman will be appearing in potoroo nightmares for weeks to come. The coaching staff are furious at the lapses of concentration at the end of the halves. To be a great side you must concentrate fully for every second of the match.

One of the better players for Errinundera was the midfielder zirza, another of the “Candide” players. Like her nose, her feet aren’t quite right to look at but somehow they’re attractive all the same. She is extremely ticklish so I don’t often get to massage her feet.

http://i55.photobucket.com/albums/g136/regnans/East%20Gippsland/zirza.jpg

zirza is the latest “big thing” from Rodger River but, really, she’s not in the same class as longipesp or ubhashinim. She’s almost qualified as a medical practitioner but, being something of a prima donna, I have my doubts about her bedside manner.

Speaking of beside manner and “Candide” players, zenoida informed me before we left for Demot that she was pregnant with our child. That’s foot massages for you. Anyway, the child is due on the same day as the World Cup Final. I hope that’s auspicious. Apparently she has known for a while but didn’t let on. I hadn’t noticed. I suppose I’m always looking at her feet.

Anyway, next up is Rejistania at the Liberation Stadium in McKillops Bridge. More coincidences – it’s the home ground of the Kingfishers whose colours are the same as Rejistania’s. The rivalry between Kingfishers and every other team in the Association is so intense the locals may even support the visitors.

Goalkickers so far:
11 rosaniel
6 addicksonia
6 venu
5 lyseup
2 otelopea
1 cunégonde
1 zenoida

mckennap
Chastened footcare specialist to the potoroos

Dazza: Good day everyone, I think folks who I am by now.
Ricky: And I'm Ricky Pointy Stick who was to keep Dazza under control, and this is THE FOOTBALL LIFE at World Cup 32
Dazza: It's getting to that stage when some teams know they have to home with nothing but a bit of pride, that is if they've won any games in the first place
Ricky: Yes, and some know they won't be qualifying.

Dazza: One team is Seckland, who got sixed out by Jeruselem last game. Only 6 goals conceded and then they played Bettia today.
Ricky: They managed the worst result of this round - losing to Bettia SEVEN NIL.
Dazza: They are fighting hard to be wooden spooners of Group 10, and doing a fantastic job of trying hard to win and losing anyway.
Ricky: Yes and winning a wooden spoon isn't all bad. Jeruselem once tried these things but then it found a way to win games!

Dazza: See, don't write off Bettia. Two losses but to good teams.
Ricky: Jeruselem just keep on scoring goals and the goal difference is getting scary now - with conceding 5 goals so far for all games!
Dazza: Cuation held us to draw last time and Jeruselem attacked from the outset, showing Cuation what it means to be on offensive.
Ricky: Last time they did well, but not today. We smashed them FOUR ONE

Dazza: Cuation were 3rd with a chance to be 2nd but Jeruselem were not going to give up the points at all. No, not even sharing them as we are expected to be there in end.
Cuation: With the strike force of captain Kate Bush, the silky manly skills of Big Gay All and the powerman Tunk as well as the Jeruselem midfield minus Dazza here - they were lost at sea.
Dazza: People were worried about the lack of leadership from Kate, but she's showing she can lead by example. Look at our goal scoring spree.
Ricky: Pity she thinking of retiring! Most retiring female footballers become stay-at-home Mums except for girls like me who are super Mums

Dazza: Speaking of scoring, the girls from Dorian and Sonya scored a rare win - their second. I know these girls score with Ricky too but they beat The Gold TyGrr THREE NIL
Ricky: Too little too late from these girls, with so many teams ahead of them
Dazza: They need a coach who can mentally toughen them up really
Ricky: They've never done too well really

Dazza: Oh and Tynelia beat the team from Dumania, TWO NIL. Yafor 2 had the bye. With the Cuation loss, I think Tynelia may have stolen 3rd spot!
Ricky: Tynelia's win over Bettia - and Bettia did just trash some SEVEN NIL, they are looking good. Yafor 2's bye didn't help them much.
Dazza: Still, 3rd spot is for grabs and threes are still there. Day by day, Jeruselem and Bettia are pulling away and these teams need results, wins and more wins as the big seeds just keep on winning.
Ricky: This is going to be really tight race in the end.

Dazza: The New Hypocria, a team you'd expect Nedalia to beat.
Ricky: And Nedalia performed a Hypocrian trick but not winning, instead just a 2 ALL draw.
Dazza: No panic Ricky! Nedalia and Bedistan will finish top 2. The Lions have ROARED this cup
Ricky: I'm proud to be Nedalian and of the Nedalian team too, and Dazza's team as well!

Dazza: YAP YAP, today's topic is "Are female footballers ugly?"
Ricky: Where did this come from?
Dazza: Some local journos complained female players look more like men - with all them muscles and stuff.
Ricky: Look, female atheletes only look ugly because some people don't like their females to be well, athetic. Most female atheletes are not ugly, they just have a lot of muscle and look bulkier but are probably fitter and stronger than your average female. I'm the opposite, I like female footballers!

Dazza: Ricky, you like most women.
Ricky: That too! Especially football women like you.
Dazza: I'm just small, sexy and cute. That's all.
Ricky: Dazza's understating again.

Dazza: That's it from me for the FOOTBALL LIFE. Watch the highlights packages tonight.
Ricky: And Dazza fell asleep on the Jeruselem players bench again.
Dazza: Did I?
Ricky: You were talking tactics with Kate and then got tired.

Dazza: Oh, that's why Dad had to carry me back to the players room. Must eat more!

Group 10:
Tynelia [2] Dumania [0]
The Gold TyGrr [0] Dorian and Sonya [3]
Jeruselem [4] Cuation [1]
Bettia [7] Seckland [0]

BYE: Yafor 2

Group 5:
Nedalia [2] The New Hypocria [2]

Mikaela Eyre stands in front of a throng of Assegai supporters who are all chanting:

“We are Assegai supporters! Loyal through and through! Over and over, we will follow you! ASSEGAI! ASSEGAI! ASSEGAI!”

Mikaela laughs. “Good evening to you and yours, wherever you may be! The scene at Cathedral Park and in the lobby of The Great Cathedral, in the heart of Leá Monde is one of merriment and unbridled joy tonight, after an energized Assegai Developments squad defeated visiting Florida Oranges, 6-2, in front of a sell-out crowd of 50,600 screaming supporters!”

The supporters behind her cheer loudly and start chanting again:

“We love Assegai, we do! We love Assegai, yes, we do! We love Assegai, we do! Oh, Assegai, we love you!”

Mikaela laughs again. “Fielding a team with several reserves, most of them making their National Team starting debuts, Assegai got off the blocks immediately; overwhelming the unsuspecting Florida Oranges defense, which was not prepared for the darting runs of Assegai forwards Stephen de Cobhan, Samantha Neesa and Severus Snape.

“In fact, Assegai didn’t waste any time, with Neesa and Snape running a wall that allowed de Cobham to break free and blast a shot past the stumbling Florida Oranges keeper in the 5th minute of play.

“Assegai dictated the flow of the game and four minutes later, Snape beat his defender one-on-one and fired a long, curving shot that found the upper right corner from 15 yards out to put Assegai up 2-0.

“However, with so many young players in the starting roster, Assegai also made several mental errors allowing Florida Oranges to run the ball back and score in the 17th minute, which had keeper Callo Merlose screaming at her younger teammates.

“Nonetheless, Assegai maintained control of the pitch, and in the 43rd minute, Snape shook his defender again, streaked up to the keeper and executed a spin move that left the keeper in shambles, firing the shot deep into the empty net and igniting a huge reaction from the crowd.”

The supporters behind her begin chanting again:

“Ooooooh, Severus! Ooooooh, Severus! You mean so much to us! Whenever you score, we just love to hear you scream and cuss!”

Mikaela doubles over in laughter and she turns around. “You guys are nuts!” she screams at the supporters.

“YEEAAAAH!” they respond. “Mikaeala’s a hottie! Mikealea’s a hottie!”

She turns to the camera giggling and she blushes.

“With Assegai clearly in charge, 3-1, at the half, Sir Knight Edgard Zúniga didn’t make any changes. However, the Riskbreakers came out looking flat, and within five minutes, Florida Oranges had scored again, off a corner kick that should have been cleared out by young Stephen Maison, who fanned on a clearing kick, allowing a Florida Oranges forward to pounce on the shot, leaving Merlose very little time to react.

“Merlose chewed him out after the play, and Maison didn’t have any more problems the rest of the match. With the score 3-2 in favor of Assegai, there was lull in the action, but that wouldn’t last long. In the 60th minute, midfielder Alys Spicer tore through a group of Florida Oranges player and ran up to their keeper, dishing off the ball to Neesa at the last second, who tapped the ball in for the goal.

“Assegai kept pressuring, pounding shot after shot at the Florida Oranges goal, missing out on several scoring opportunities. Assegai didn’t seem to tire at all as the game wore on, though, and intensified their attack in the 74th minute. Coming off a wall, Snape chased down a through ball and chipped it over the charging Florida Oranges keeper, putting Assegai up 5-2.

“Assegai didn’t let up, and in the 83rd minute, Snape scored again, chesting down a cross from Spicer and firing a shot that beat the Florida Oranges keeper low and away. Up 6-2, Assegai kept pressing on the attack, but that would be all for today.”

Suddenly, the supporters begin to chant: “He’s mean! He’s sour! Get out the way! Get out the way! Snape says, ‘Move over!’”

Mikaela laughs. “Fans, we have a treat for you, tonight! We have Severus and Callo!” She turns to her left and Severus and Callo are there, waving at the camera and back toward the supporters, who are screaming at the top of their lungs.

“Wow! Listen to them,” says Callo, beaming at the crowd. “They’ve been like this all day long! I heard them during warm-ups and throughout the entire game. We have great fans and I love them all!”

“Despite the Florida Oranges goals, you had a great game, Callo. How was it to be back in front of the net?” Mikaela asks her.

“What a rush! No matter how many times I suit up for a game at this stage, I always have goose bumps,” she says. “I think the excitement really propelled our younger players tonight, but it also made them a bit sloppy. Still, you can’t go wrong with six goals! And, wow…Snape had four goals!”

Snape rolls his eyes and smiles to the side.

“Severus…four goals; what a performance,” says Mikaela, turning to him.

Snape sighs. “Yeah, you can say that,” he says. “Florida Oranges wasn’t about to lay down for us, so I had to knock them out with a four-ton hammer. Four goals for Assegai.”

“What’d you think of the support you guys got tonight from all these fans?” Mikaela asks him.

“Oh, they’re great,” he says turning to them. “They come up with the craziest stuff during the games. Sometimes, I’ll find myself listening to them.”

“So, with this game under your belt, what do you foresee in your next game against The Mushroom Kingship?” she asks him.

“Difficult,” he says flatly. “We might have beaten them the first time we played, but that was a huge upset for us. Now, we’re playing at their place and you know they won’t want to lose in front of the home crowd.”

“Yeah, beating them the first time really made us believe we belong in this system,” Callo says. “Even if we don’t qualify for the Proper, we’ve accumulated a wealth of experience. But, if we can beat them again…won’t that be nice?”

The fans behind them roar and begin chanting again: “We want cream of mushroom! We want cream of mushroom! It’s time for The Mushroom Kingship to face their doom! Cream of mushroom!”

“Well, you guys are just full of them tonight, aren’t you?” Mikaela turns to the crowd. “Well, Callo, Severus, thanks for you comments tonight.” They nod to her, wave to the crowd and head off.

“Fans, for everyone down here at Cathedral Park, I bid thee a good night. This is Mikaela Eyre signing off! Assegai wins again!”

Game Summary

http://spaam.mrdrake.net/flags/assegai_developments.png Assegai Developments 6
http://spaam.mrdrake.net/flags/florida_oranges.png Florida Oranges 2

@ Cathedral Park – Leá Monde, Valendia.
Attendance; 50,600

[AD]
Stephen de Cobham (5’)
Severus Snape (9’, 43’, 74’, 83’)
Samantha Neesa (60’)

[FLO]
??? ???? (17’)
??? ???? (49’)

FALLEN ANGELS

Northern Caesarea – 2 - v – 1 - Fort Europe

Report by Amy Bystander, Commonwealth News.

Josephine Blanchard's twenty third minute opener was not enough to subdue a powerful performance from Northern Caesarea away from home, and Fort Europe failed to collect points from a second match in a row. Few chances fell to the travelling side leaving fans disapointed, but against superior high seeded opposition team a win was simply too much to hope for. Fort Europe will now travel back home to the Commonwealth stadium to face Harlesburg for the second time, and will be looking to get back to winning ways.

PLAYER RATINGS
(Out of 10)

6 - James West
7 - Floe Peltsten
6 - Tim Forrester (C)
8 - Aki Haddon
7 - Gemma Lloyd
7 - Vicky Princess
6 - Ryan Holmes []
7 - Mia Nevola
7 - Edowine Sanjuan
7 - Michelle Bishop
8 - Josephine Blanchard (23)

SUBS

- - Tom Reas
- - Laura Harris
- - Murphy Lee
6 - Katherine Keller (On for Holmes (50))
7 - Karl Isaak (On for Princess (50))

L'REVIS ULU ULTRINNAN

Fort Europe – 2 – v – 1 - Harlesburg

Report by Amy Bystander, Commonwealth News.

Back on the road to victory, Fort Europe proved once again the value of tactics and skilled experienced players as they brushed passed Harlesburg to add another three points to their already impressive collection. Unfortuanatly the likes of Starblaydia and group leaders The Archregimancy are now safely out in front and will qualify from the group effortlessly. Fort Europe on the other hand now have a tough battle to the end with Northern Caesarea who lie now just one point behind. Both teams have a bye match left, and both sides also must play The Archregimancy, and with four matches left to play the fight for third place could go either way. Another goal for Michelle Bishop takes her tournement total up to nine, while team captain Tim Forrester slotted home from the penalty spot to give Fort Europe another comfortable win, upset only by a lapse of consentration five minutes from the end which cost keeper James West a clean sheet.

"The competition is really starting to heat up, and we're getting tired. I hope we have the stamina to hold out to the end and qualify from this group but only time will tell. Michelle's still on top form, putting away shots in almost every game, with out her I think we would never have stould a chance." Said team captain Tim Forrester after the game.
In other news, the Commonwealth Sports Council are to take leagal action against Assegai news service The Crimson Blade, after they broadcast a fabricated interview with Fort Europe players Karl Isaak and Josephine Blanchard edited from a recording of a telelink conversation between the two players which has been taken completely out of context according to the Council's media representitive Josh Hornet. The players themselves have been advised not to comment on the issue until after the hearing.

PLAYER RATINGS
(Out of 10)

8 - James West
7 - Floe Peltsten
9 - Tim Forrester (C) (Pen 65)
8 - Aki Haddon
7 - Gemma Lloyd []
8 - Vicky Princess
8 - Ryan Holmes
8 - Mia Nevola
7 - Edowine Sanjuan []
9 - Michelle Bishop (41)
7 - Josephine Blanchard

SUBS

- - Tom Reas
- - Laura Harris
8 - Murphy Lee (On for Peltsten (45))
- - Katherine Keller
7 - Karl Isaak (On for Blanchard (58))

<symbol of the “Tynelian Nightly Sporting News with Jeff Jefferson” looms in the background>

Jeff Jefferson: Well moving on to the World Cup now, I think we can say its official now. Tynelia is on a roll winning its fourth in a row, this time beating Dumania by a 2-0 score. Fans are really coming back behind the team now don’t you think Dinah?

Dinah Miller: Yes amazing what winning does to a fan base. Some of my friends that swore off the sport after the last Cup are now leaving messages for me about how great the team is doing and how they knew it all along.

Tom Thompson: So the bandwagonners are jumping back on again then?

Jeff: Nevermind that Tom, the important thing is that with Cuation’s loss to Jerusalem, Tynelia has moved into third place by a point.

Dinah: Yafor 2 was off so they’ve dropped seven points behind us with only 5 matches to go, they’re on the verge of dropping out of the chase altogether.

Tom: Yeah but we hit the tough part of the schedule now.

Jeff: That’s true but after the team avoided a letdown against Dumania after its big win against Bettia I like the team’s chances even if we’ll be on the road.

Dinah: It was a surprise to see Alan Dawson actually score today. In fact he looked more surprised than anyone. But the Dumanian keeper slipped on the slick field with all the rain we’ve had today and there it was.

Jeff: And Connor MacDougal moves to within one goal of Jay Masterson’s all time World Cup scoring mark of 11 with today’s goal.

Tom: D&S won today so at least we don’t have to worry about them being due for one when we go there next match.

Dinah: Don’t be too sure Tom, D&S has had another poor Cup, their second in a row. I’m sure they’re taking any match they have against the teams ahead of them with an eye at being a spoiler for the teams ahead of them. We only won the first match 2-0 so I expect another low scoring match this time around.

Tom: That almost sounded like a prediction there Dinah.

Dinah: Don’t worry Tom its not. Just look at the schedule. Everyone knows how big the match with Cuation is going to be. That might determine who advances between us after all. So people are sort of looking past D&S and they’re too good a team to do that to.

Jeff: And then its Jerusalem after that, seeing what they did to Cuation this time around after Cuation got a draw the first time they met I’m sure they’re keying up to avenge the only other blemish on their record when they face us after the Cuation match.

Dinah: That’s true too Jeff. D&S looks like a perfect trap game for us given who we have afterwards. An underperforming good team taking on a team on a four game winning streak. All the signs are there guys.

Tom: I don’t think Coach Billington will let that happen though.

Jeff: Well most of these players have seen this before though none of them I bet can recall a mid group run like this one. Usually its fast start, fast finish and ruination of any hope in between. Besides, I think the press is actually helping out this time.

Dinah: What do you mean?

Jeff: Well if you’ve been looking at the papers lately the press is making this out to be Jay Masterson’s final run at a World Cup and a “win one for the Old Man” theme is coming out a lot now, especially with this run. Sometimes a team can be shamed into performing.

Tom: So you think the team will be too embarrassed if they fall short this time?

Jeff: No, just that the press will probably be all over the idea if they fall short.

Dinah: That’s kinda true Jeff, Masterson had said years ago that he’ll keep playing until he actually makes a World Cup. I can’t see his performance four years from now being enough to make the team one more time if they fail this time. Even this year his choice was thought of as more a sympathy pick by his old teammate Coach Billington. So realistically this should be the last bit of group play for Masterson one way or the other.

Jeff: Well it looks like we’ve gotten ourselves onto this “win one for the old man” bandwagon ourselves now.

Dinah: Guess you’re right, I never really thought about it that way until now.

Tom: You hear that? Get the old fella his World Cup appearance already!

<Dinah and Jeff chuckle>

Jeff: Well that’s our show for today. Next time more World Cup coverage and a look at the hit show Tynelian Gladiators. Sport or cheap entertainment for the masses.? Good night everyone.

The Assegai Sports Network is vexed as to the comments presented in Fort Europe's Commonwealth News. Usual ASN reporter Mikaela Eyre had the day off, but Assegai Developments forward Samantha Neesa reported live from Northern Ceasarea. It was a live report, via satellite, and irreputable evidence shows two of Fort Europe's players chatting with Neesa. There was a friendly exchange between the Assegai and Fort Europe players before and after the game, when both teams went to a local pub to drink and view the game between Elves Security Forces and Turori. If anyone at the Commonwealth News is upset, the ASN offers an apology, but the live transmission is irreputable.

Dear Diary

I've decided that me talking about the Marauders in my entries is causing them bad luck, for they lost another match last night. Soo this entry is going to be a little different. Anyways, the day started out pretty well, woke up and went over to the Santapas. Did you know that they have a new baby girl? Her name is Rose Diamond Santapa, she is cute. I hope she will get along well in school, being half human and all. I know some of those idiots at the Prep school think that we should still only have relationships in the species, I say they are stuck up hyprocrits. Wasn't it Elune who said to treat each individual as you would treat your family? I swear, it's people like that, that give elves a bad name. Anyways, the Santapas took me out for some lunch out in Capri. After coaxing Luna, me and Ron were able to convice her to go to Snapilicous Pizza Parlor, whose owner is no other than Severus Snape, striker for the FC Capri and Assegai national team. We split two pepperonnis and then went next door to the bowling alley. Me and Ron bowled a few frames, with me taking the highest score with a 249. Perhaps I should persue a career in that instead of football. =p

Well after that, we took the ferry back to Rinaldi and made the short drive back to Raynor City and they dropped me off at my parents. Unfortunately, they had both left already for the afternoon pratice. Soo I plopped down on the couch and played some EPLM, and took Capri all the way to the title. Too bad they probably won't do so in the season, the Rockers are just looking way too strong once more. Maybe the Hawks can topple them, though I'm not sure even their great play will be enough. Well six rolled around faster than I anticipated and I made my way down to the Santapas, and they took me back to Capri, and we all were able to bypass the lines thanks to the press pass they have, and me being son to two starters. We agonizely watch the squad fall , but at least we got to see a blue dragon show during half time. After they had the post game speech from Revtron, mom, dad, and I went back home, where I made some spaghetti, and then we all retired to our rooms. I'm hoping that they can overcome whatever is ailing them, and lead the Marauders to some victory. With the loss they are in a dire spot, but not entirely impossible.

Kiso Night

CAFUNDÉU FOUGHT HARD TO WIN ANOTHER GAME

http://img.terra.com.br/i/2006/09/27/401195-2111-ga.jpg
Game was full of goals

This game was very different from the latest ones. In the last games, Cafundéu won thanks to the details, winning scoring only one goal, or failing to score. This time, Cafundéu was able to show all its offensive ability and scored three goals, two with attackers and one with an offensive midfielder. This victory makes Cafundéu really close to a qualification, as the team will only need to defeat Spaam and after that wait to see if The Lowland Clans can defeat them.

Spaam didn’t played in this round, so Cafundéu was able to increase its advantage to marvelous eight points of difference, with four matches to go, but the next opponents have one game less. The next game of Cafundéu will be in Lasft against Spaam, so it’ll be a very important game. With four games to play, two being at home and two away, the players are anxious to see what will be the final results. The people of the country are waiting for more good results.

THE GAME
The stadium of Praça Maior got some new stands, and the capacity was increased to a hundred and twenty thousand people. But even with a huge capacity, one supporter didn’t get a ticket and was able to dribble the security, invading the stadium. The weather was very good and the game could start without problems. Cafundéu decided to attack since the start, using the wing-backs for fast counterattacks. Andossa did the same, although concentrated the attack in the centre.

3rd minute: Kliek got the ball in the midfield and passed it to Ernesto Ijak, who dribbled a defender and invaded the area. The goalkeeper came to take the ball from him, but he was able to shoot the ball over him. Unfortunately, the ball went over the bar and left the playing field. 5th minute: Andossa replied with a fast attack. A midfielder received the ball and tried to score shooting from outside the area, but he missed the goal and sent the ball wide.

9th minute: Ray Kirs started a good attack for Cafundéu running since the defense. He reached the midfield and passed the ball to Priotto, who stopped near the entrance of the area and crossed the ball to the area. Ganz Ijak headed it, but the goalkeeper made a fine save. 12th minute: Another chance that started from a wing-back. This time, Vandick got the ball and made a long range pass to the attack. Ernesto Ijak got it, dribbled a defender and shot to the goal, scoring the first goal of the game.

A goal increased the morale of Cafundéu’s players, who started to play with more confidence and started to slowly control the game. The coach Franz Braddock, who was sent off in the last game, was more calm now. But the opponents didn’t stop, and continued their attacks. 15th minute: A winger of Andossa Se Mitrin Vega took the ball from Brahma and passed it to an attacker. The attacker invaded the area and shot, but the goalkeeper Vargas saved.

20th minute: Anormal received the ball and, as usual, ran over a defender, found space to shoot, and shot. The ball came fast to the goal, but the goalkeeper saved with style, an excellent save. 23rd minute: Vandick fouled a midfielder. The free kick was taken by a winger and the ball was crossed to the area. After a confusion inside the area, an attacker shot the ball, but sent the ball wide. 26th minute: Becão passed the ball to Anormal, who dribbled a midfielder and sent the ball to Brahma. The midfielder controlled the ball and shot to the goal, but sent the ball over the bar.

http://img.terra.com.br/i/2006/09/27/401196-5359-ga.jpg
Ganz Ijak battles for the ball against an opponent

30th minute: A midfielder of Andossa made a great play in the right of the field, reaching the area. He crossed the ball, but Sávio Ferrari hit it and sent it for a corner. One of the midfielders took the corner. One of the attackers headed the ball, but he missed the goal. 34th minute: Anormal started another attack, knocking an opponent and passing the ball to Priotto in the midfield. He reached the entrance of the area and passed the ball to Kliek, who headed it to the goal. The goalkeeper saved, but gave the rebound. A defender got the ball and shot it to safety.

38th minute: A midfielder of the visitor team got the ball and dribbled Priotto. He couldn’t invade the area, as Becão marked him well, so he had to pass the ball to an attacker, but Sávio Ferrari intercepted the ball. 40th minute: Ray Kirs passed the ball to Brahma, who dribbled a midfielder and passed to Ernesto Ijak in the area. He shot the ball to the goal, but he missed it and sent the ball over the bar. 42nd minute: Ganz Ijak received the ball from Anormal and was fouled by a defender, who received a yellow card.

44th minute: In a fast attack of the visitor team, Vandick fouled the opponent. The goalkeeper came to take it. He shot the free kick with ability, and gave no chances to Vargas, scoring the goal. Injury Time: Kliek received the ball from Anormal in the midfield, was chased by two defenders, but was able to get rid of them. He reached the entrance of the area and shot to the goal, but the ball hit the post and left the playing field. The first half ended in a draw.

To get a more positive result, the coach Franz Braddock put the attacker Incisivo in Brahma’s place. Andossa made a change too, but didn’t change its style. The second half started with the same offensive attitude of the first half. 4th minute: Kliek received the ball, dribbled an opponent and passed it to Ganz Ijak. The lethal striker invaded the area and shot to the goal, but the ball hit the post, so the attacker missed a great chance to score. 5th minute: Vandick fouled an opponent and received a yellow card.

7th minute: In a counterattack, a player of Andossa Se Mitrin Vega passed the ball to a midfielder, who dribbled Sávio Ferrari and passed to a winger. The winger waited for the midfielder to enter in the area and crossed the ball to him, who headed and scored the third goal of the game. 10th minute: Ray Kirs passed the ball to Priotto, who ran to the left side of the field and crossed the ball to the area. Ganz Ijak headed it, but unfortunately he sent the ball over the bar.

Losing the game even after scoring the first goal, Cafundéu started to slow down. But the coach Franz Braddock started to shout with his players, saying things like: “Can’t you pass the ball?” or “Shoot in the goal, you’re good enough for that!” He was becoming angry again, and the team started to play better to avoid to hear more critics from their own coach. 13th minute: Anormal received the ball, knocked an opponent and passed the ball to Vandick in the right wing. He crossed it to the area, but a defender headed it to outside the area. Priotto got the rebound and shot, but the goalkeeper saved.

http://img.terra.com.br/i/2006/09/27/401198-2744-ga.jpg
Many fouls were seen in this game

17th minute: Andossa Se Mitrin Vega started a fast counterattack after Ernesto Ijak lost the ball inside the opponent’s area. A winger got the ball and passed to an attacker who had to fight with Sávio Ferrari for the ball. He got it, but Sávio Ferrari fouled him and received the yellow card. The goalkeeper took the free kick, but this time he missed the goal. 21st minute: Kliek took the ball from a midfielder and ran to the attack. He saw Incisivo in a good position and passed the ball to him. Incisivo shot, but was blocked by a defender.

24th minute: An opponent defender made a mistake and Ganz Ijak took the ball. He dribbled a defender, but was fouled inside the area by another defender. It was a clear penalty, but the referee ignored Braddock and Cafundéu’s players. 28th minute: Ernesto Ijak passed the ball to his brother Ganz, who dribbled two defenders and waited for the goalkeeper to come to him. Ganz Ijak dribbled the goalkeeper with style and entered in the goal with the ball, scoring a marvelous goal. All the players commemorated it very much, as Cafundéu could be close to a good result after the goal.

30th minute: Incisivo made a good pass to Ganz Ijak, who was going to invade the area when he was fouled. The referee shown him the yellow card. Vandick took the free kick but missed the goal. He was very tired, so Franz Braddock had to put Wantuirso in his place, reinforcing the defense. 34th minute: In a very fast counterattack, Ganz Ijak passed the ball to Kliek, who shot the ball from outside the area. It hit a defender and entered inside the goal. The referee gave the goal to Kliek instead of saying that it was an own goal.

Winning the game, Braddock decided to remove Ernesto Ijak from the game and put Manuel Padaria in. 39th minute: An Andossa player made a good play in the centre of the midfield and tried to score shooting from a long distance. His shot was very weak, so the goalkeeper of Cafundéu Julio Vargas didn’t have difficulties to save. The supporters of Cafundéu were looking forward for the end of the game, as the team could get an important victory.

42nd minute: Priotto was with the ball in the midfield and decided to hold it for all the time that he could. Many opponent players tried to get the ball, but he managed to hold it for more than a minute before passing it to Incisivo, who tried to dribble a defender and lost the ball. 45th minute: In the last good play of the game, a midfielder of Andossa Se Mitrin Vega reached the area and shot, but he sent the ball over the bar. After that, the referee ended the game and the supporters of Cafundéu could commemorate.

After the game, the players gave interviews to the local media. The defender Becão said: “Well, we had some difficult minutes when we were losing the game. But we could control ourselves and give our best to recover and to get the victory.” The midfielder Anormal said: “For some minutes we thought that the victory was distance, but thanks to the good performance of our attackers we were able to score two goals more and defeat them.” And the attacker Incisivo said: “This result was very important. Now we’re more close of the qualification.”

The coach Franz Braddock also talked with the press after the end of the game: “Today we did a good job defeating Andossa Se Mitrin Vega. Now, with only four matches to go, we need to keep working hard. I’ll make some changes in the team, but our style will remain the same. If we defeat Spaam, the place in the World Cup will be very close, so we’ll fight for the victory in the next game. The supporters that came to the stadium also helped us very much, so thanks to them too.”

http://img.terra.com.br/i/2006/11/15/421207-7861-ga.jpg
Some supporters tried to invade the stadium

CAFUNDÉU 3x2 ANDOSSA SE MITRIN VEGA

Place: Praça Maior, in Cafundó do Juta.
Attendance: 120,001 people.(full plus one guy that dribbled the security).
Referee: Bartolomeo Gazellini Labambi.
Man of the Match: Ganz Ijak(Cafundéu).

http://spaam.mrdrake.net/flags/cafundeu.png CAFUNDÉU: Vargas, Vandick(Wantuirso), Kirs, Becão and Sávio Ferrari; Anormal, Priotto, Brahma(Incisivo) and Kliek; Ernesto Ijak(Manuel Padaria) and Ganz Ijak.
Coach: Franz Braddock.

http://spaam.mrdrake.net/flags/andossa_se_mitrin_vega.png ANDOSSA SE MITRIN VEGA: no team released.

Ratings:
9- Ganz Ijak.
8- Kirs, Anormal, Priotto, Kliek and Ernesto Ijak.
7- Vandick and Incisivo.
6- Vargas, Becão, Brahma and Manuel Padaria.
5- Sávio Ferrari and Wantuirso.

GOALS: CAFUNDÉU: Ernesto Ijak 12’ , Ganz Ijak 68’ , Kliek 79’.
ANDOSSA SE MITRIN VEGA: The goalkeeper 44’ , A midfielder 52’.

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Cafundéu – next game’s formation: Vargas, Cafézinho, Kirs, Becão and Sávio Ferrari; Anormal, Priotto and Kliek; Heitor, Ernesto Ijak and Ganz Ijak.
Style of +2

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Goalscorers after 12 games:
7- Ganz Ijak.
3- Heitor and Anormal.
1- Kirs, Brahma, Becão, Kliek and Ernesto Ijak.

6th minute. 1-0.

"We're on our way...
We're on our way...
We're on our way
We're on our way
We're on our way..."

28th minute. 2-0.

"Ohh, Frankie Frankie,
Frankie Frankie Frankie Frankie Frankie Treves..."

48th minute. 3-0.

"When Andy Saint
Goes marching in
When Andy Saint goes marching in...
We're gonna score another goal
When Andy Saint goes marching in!"

81st minute. 4-0.

"Can we play you
Can we play you
Can we play you every week?
Can we play you every week?"

83rd minute. 5-0.

"Six-five...
We're gonna lose six-five..."

Amazingly Wentland had gone nap for a second time, despite Norman Hacker's normal defensive tactics. Stromboland were run down by a royal blue tide of breaks and finishing straight from the executioner school in Newbridge. And after a couple of defeats the Swifts were back on course.

Perhaps it was fortuitous that the fixture list spat out a stroll in the park immediately before the Qazox game. Despite the point gap, the Went supporters knew that Qazox could easily catch it up. A win in the crucial game and a win in their in hand and suddenly Wentland's qualification was in serious doubt. Not forgetting the Lisburn Mateys, capable of upsetting anyone on their day, or the pesky Assegai Developments who kept putting wins together.

However there was some controversy about the choice of match location. The largest stadium was the Warplands Stadium and the WFA awarded the home of Warpstone the match. But with the Warplands ready to field their own team in a sub-national tournament there were many suggesting that it might be more difficult for Wentland in front of a crowd with distinctly shallow loyalties. Certainly Hacker's general approach was at odds of those of the fans of Warpstone and the lack of Stones stars in the national squad - as well as those of other teams within the Warplands - meant that home advantage might not have been as advantageous as it otherwise could have been.

Demot Daily ~ Hope

Well, they might be longshots, but the Dynamo are proving their worth and then some. They did so again, breaking through and taking a vluable point from the hands of Errinundera, with the young starlet of Sarah Ysman playing hero once again. The team is going to need some help if they are to make the Proper, that much is certain, but at least they will be able to come out of this Cup with a measure of respect earned against their quality oppisition. With that, the new generation of Dynamo football can hang their heads high, and know that nothing but greatness is ahead of them, and it is ripe for the taking.

The game itself started out quite slow, with the only goal in the first half coming into the injury time, when Ysman took a wonderful through ball from Black, and put one powerful shot past the Erri keeper. Well, each team was came out in the second half with a mission, put pressure on the oppisitions backline, and each did quite well and quickly. Lyseup was the recipiant of some nice work by the Erri midfield, and was able to sneak past their marker, and put it past Orien. Well the Dynamo took it to them on the restart, but their attack cost them as Venu was able to gather a rebound, and sprinted the legnth of the field, having just enough left to spin past Orien, and give Erri the lead by dunking it into the open net.

The Dynamo were not deterred, and the work of the forwards on the restart resulted in Frontson being open from the penalty spot, and blasting one home when Masteron dashed it to him. The game was back and forth, both squads fighting it out for the critical points. Then the visitors cracked Orien once more, with Rosaniel flying by the marker, and heading in a perfect cross. The Dynamo looked crush, and were failing to get any attack going. It was then, off a Venu shot that went off the post, that the stunner happen. Masteron gathered the loose ball, and cleared it across midfield, where Ysman was all alone. She gathered it in stride, and easily got it past the keeper, and was just finishing her cart-wheel when the whistle blew, and the squad has drew. This will obviously give the Dynamo a huge lift in confidence, and give them some much needed momentum, as they head into the strech.

Article by Jasmine Olyvander

The Daily Quak
Sharks Just Can't Get The Beat

The Quakmybush National Soccer Team continued their World Cup 32 qualifying run. The Sharks were taking on Dance 2 Revolution, last time these teams took on each other the Sharks took their only loss of the qualifying campaign so far. The Sharks came out ready to play. Jon Fields came down the left wing and took a shot but the opposing keeper made a good save. The Sharks had a huge breakdown when Jorge Valez made a horrible pass that was picked off, a opposing forward came in and made a wonderful move, he then found the back of the net, Dance 2 Revolution led 1-0. This was the score going into the half. The Sharks came into the second half with reckless abandon, they needed a goal, and they wanted a goal. Cory Sorley hoped to deliver when he broke in all alone on the keeper, however, he hit the post. Nothing really happened until the 2nd minute of injury time, when Jon Fields broke in all alone, however just as he was about to shoot the whistle went and the game was ended. Coach and defender Greg Hughes flipped out, as 4 minutes were added just not two. A spectator was heard saying "These four minutes were done faster then Saddam's execution." The Sharks had lost 1-0.

Quakmybush - 0
None

Dance 2 Revolution - 1
Forward 13'

The Sharks had lost their streak of not allowing a goal. They also lost their winning streak. Their lead in their group also got smaller, to only three points over New Montreal States.

Goal Scorers
Sorley - 13
Fields - 12
Fret - 4
Graves - 3
Plett, Miller, Martin, Baker, Ralegigh - 1

Article By: Rick Juras

“Greetings, Assegai football fans, this is Mikaela Eyre reporting live from The Mushroom Kingship, where tonight the Assegai Developments National Team will face the home team in another World Cup XXXII qualifier.

“With all his players matchfit, Assegai manager Sir Knight Edgard Zúniga has reinserted his normal starting roster, but not before acknowledging the effectiveness of his subs, who filled in so nicely in Assegai’s 6-2 victory over Florida Oranges.

“With us at this moment is Assegai goalie Edward van de Beauchamp, who’ll be back in front of Assegai’s net after spending the last week with the flu.”

She turns to Edward, who’s wearing his Assegai goalie uniform.

“Nice to have you back, Edward. What’d you think of Callo’s performance in your stead last week?” she asks him.

“Despite those two goals Florida scored, she did great,” he says. “Every time I see her play, I wonder how she’s not the team’s number one keeper, and it motivates me to play harder.”

“What do you think about The Mushroom Kingship?” she asks.

“Oh, man, this game is big!” he says excitedly. “Well, they’re all big. But, we’ve beat them before, and we need to beat them again if we’re to preserve any hopes of advancing to the Proper. Up next we have a huge game against Qazox, and they better realize that we’re bringing everything—even the kitchen sink. But, first, we have to take care of business with The Mushroom Kingship.”

Mikaela nods. “I heard that assistant coach Joel Monroy fixed up some of his famous cream of mushroom soup for lunch today.”

Edward laughs. “No disrespect to The Mushroom Kingship, but we love cream of mushroom.”

“What do you think about the performance of the other YoungWorld nations in these World Cup qualifiers?” Mikaela asks him.

“We have a fierce rivalry with Elves Security Forces within our region, but it’s still a little sad to see them lose despite having such a strong team. That Kiso Night is going to be a great player in time,” he says. “Still, better them than us. We’re still rivals and their losses aren’t keeping me up at night. As far as Fort Europe is concerned; we share a mutual respect and we wish them the best. If they make the Proper, you know we’ll be there to support them.”

“Well, we’re a couple of hours before game time. Thanks for your time, Edward. We wish you the best tonight,” Mikaela tells him, patting him on the back.

“Thanks, Mikaela. Hopefully, we’ll have something good to talk about after the game,” he says, waving as he walks away.

“Fans, thanks for tuning in tonight. Remember to catch tonight’s game on ASN, and our post-game report. This is Mikaela Eyre signing off.”

http://spaam.mrdrake.net/flags/the_mushroom_kingship.png The Mushroom Kingship
vs.
http://spaam.mrdrake.net/flags/assegai_developments.png Assegai Developments

James Gaines arose from his desk from what he thought was an afternoon nap, to his horror he found that he had slept through matchdays 11-15, a long time and realised that MD 16 was just around the corner, infact he slept through 2 supposed friendlies, somehow they played Spruitland, when he had thought he had organised a game with Sel Appa. Apparently some low-level paper pusher had accidently shredded the details that said that Sel Appa was being hosted here it also seemed by curious co-incidence that the Sel Appans had a misunderstanding of their own.

On the table a win against Green Wombat and Snub Nose 39, combined with a narrow loss, by one goal against Bedistan meant that the team was infact performing well, The team was in the 3rd place but the three teams where certainly well above the other teams.

No one was certain why James Gaines was asleep for months or even what happened, numerous doctors of all sorts, priests and anyone who thought they could help came. They all left with only one change occuring, they now knew they had no idea. It was indeed a surprise for all around, just mysteriously James had fallen asleep he had woken up. Which in fact eerily imitated a story from BC Inc's SuperDude comic book involving an SuperDude doppleganger.

Turtles thrash Anrow for a 4-0 victory

The Turtles defeated Anrow at home for a 4-0 victory that not only brought them back above Qutar and into third place, but also reversed the long standing negative goal difference. The Turtles shocked Anrow and rubbed it in allowing them to add a little more security to their uneasy third-place hold. Sel Appa and Qutar have for most of the Qualifiers exchanged places several times. It now comes down to the five remaining matches, which included today's. Any missteps would cost either team their hope to qualify for NS World Cup 32. Sel Appa currently has a three-point lead that they need to keep secure. A loss and a Qutari win would even them out and be decided on goal difference. Sel Appa is only 1 goal ahead, while Qutar has 4.

Sel Appa will play Okielahoma next, this time at home. The previous meet resulted in a 0-0 draw. Coach Charles DuPont is hoping for something much different: "We really need to get a win here. It is likely we will lose to Liverpool England and we cannot accept any more losses after that." Qutar plays Algal States, who surprised many earning an early third-place lead and defeatign good sides, such as Okielahoma. Some Sel Appans are hoping they will continue to create surprises and defeat Qutar, which would almost secure the Turtles into third place in group and the World Cup proper. After Okielahoma, Sel Appa visits Qutar in what is likely to be a spectacular and tense event. Chancellor Jonas Pavlov asked Qutari officials for an assurance of the team's safety, citing concerns that overzealous fans may try to hurt the team.

http://spaam.mrdrake.net/flags/sel_appa.png 4-nil http://spaam.mrdrake.net/flags/anrow.png

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v495/juvanya/wc32a.png

http://spaam.mrdrake.net/flags/elves_security_forces.png & http://spaam.mrdrake.net/flags/assegai_developments.png

When word came down to the Assegai Developments National Team that their match with The Mushroom Kingship was being postponed because match officials were unable to make it to the game on time, the team figured that they’d be better off doing something worthwhile with their time.

That’s when forward Severus Snape suggested they all travel to Capri with him. Located in Elves Security Forces, it was not only his home away from Assegai, but where he played for F.C. Capri of the ESF Premier League.

When Snape wasn’t playing for F.C. Capri or the Assegai National Team, he ran the highly popular Snapilicious Pizza Parlor, which attracted many famous football players from the EPL, fans of F.C. Capri and tourists from Assegai.

So, it was decided that the team would travel with Snape and stay at his beachside mansion for a few days. The team packed up and headed to Capri.

The next day, the entire squad went down to Snapilicious Pizza Parlor. Assegai forward Samantha Neesa was told that the entire E.S.F. National Team, Assegai’s sworn rival, would also be at the pizza parlor, which would make for an interesting afternoon.

-----

The Marauders, whose own match was postponed due to a freak blue dragon attack that ate the WC officials, decided to hang out down at the bowling alley, which was only three blocks from the stadium. The squad’s star forwards, Kyla Night and Zacharius, are semi-pro bowlers, and the squad wanted a demonstration of their skills. That's when the Riskbreakers showed up...

-----

Snape walked over to the Marauders.

“Welcome to Snapilicious Pizza. Even the Marauders are welcome here,” he says curtly. “My National Team wishes for you to join us in the skybar overlooking the bowling lanes; would you join us?”

“Got wine from Travesian up in that bar?” Kersee Hall pipes up from the back.

“We have everything, even Carnyorth Dwarvish Ale,” he says. “So, are you coming?”

Kersee Hall squeals, and runs while the rest of the squad kinda limps over.

“Hmm... You look run down. I have just the thing for you,” says Snape. “Come’on, let’s go.”

The rest of the squad shrugs and dashes after Kersee, but Kyla, Kiso, and Zacharius still follow behind slowly.

-----

“So the E.S.F. squad really is here,” says Alys Spicer with a sigh. “Is this really a good idea? I mean, don’t we have a really bad rivalry with them?”

“Just calm down, Alys,” says Callo patting her shoulder. “The elves are arrogant and stubborn, but they’re pretty cool once you get to know them.”

“Rubbish!” exclaims Jan Rosencrantz. “I still have the cleat marks on my back from the last time we played. Zacharius is lucky that Snape won’t allow me to break his face in his pizza parlor.”

“Shhh…calm down, Jan, they’re walking over here right now,” says Neesa.

“Jan, keep your mouth shut,” says Riot. “You, too, Barnard. Dominic…none of your town foolery tonight.”

Dominic Saint-Émilion shrugs his shoulders, mutters something indiscernible and slams down a stein of Arrogant Bastard Ale.

-----

Kersee runs up to the bar, orders the whole place a glass of Travesian wine, and then runs up to Neesa.

“It's soo cool to hang out with you guys outside the pitch. I think you’re amazing. By the way, your last goal in our game was remarkable. How'd you manage that bicycle kick and still land on your feet?!”

Neesa smiles at her. “Thanks, Kersee. It’s just something I practice at home with Callo. We have a small foam pit in the backyard and she tosses balls at me and I practice doing my bicycle kick for an hour or so.”

Dominic, who is sitting a few feet away suddenly looks up.

“Prepare ship for ludicrous speed!” he exclaims. “Fasten all seatbelts, seal all entrances and exits, close all shops in the mall, cancel the three ring circus, secure all animals in the zoo!”

Zacharius pops his head in from the staircase just at that second.

“If someone doesn't keep that lunatic under control, I am soo out of here.”

Jan jumps up. “Watch your mouth!”

Ashley gets in his face. “Jan, sit down and shut the hell up!” Ashley turns to Zacharius. “If you’re going to be insulting my teammates, I’d advise to leave. But, seeing as how we’re all Severus’s guests, you’d better grab something to drink and cozy up next to us.”

Zacharius shrugs and takes a seat next to his lovely wife, Kyla, as Kiso runs up the wall, and flips back onto the table, producing an iPod for Riot.

“Uh, thanks, Kiso,” says Riot, smiling. “By the way, we all agree that you’re going to be a great player. Maybe you have a future in the A-Pro League.”

Dominic gets up and scampers over to E.S.F.’s Renai Adai. He clears his throat and starts singing loudly. “Hello my baby, hello my honey, hello my ragtime gal! Send me your kiss by wire; baby my heart's on fire! If you refuse me honey you'll lose me then you'll be left alone, oh baby telephone and tell me I'm your own!” He scampers back to his seat and slams another bottle of ABA.

Renai points to Liliam. “She's my girlfriend. Back off”

Dominic smiles a Kool-Aid smile. “No sir, we call it Mr. Coffee. Care for some?”

Several Assegai players look at Dominic and shake their heads.

“So, Kiso, I hear you’re a great bowler,” says Riot. “Barnard Mallowbourne, one of our new defenders…he’s pretty darn good, too.”

“Yeah, mom taught me one summer in between EPL seasons. I manage to get a few tournaments in here and there between training to become a footballer. Average score is 200, though I was a spare away from a perfect game two weeks ago.” Kiso smiles and sits across from Neesa.

Neesa smiles back and turns her attention to Kersee. “Hey, you should come and visit me and Callo the next time Travesian comes to Char Sara. You can bunk with us.”

Dominic gets up again. “I've lost the bleeps, the sweeps and the creeps!” He walks over to Zacharius and smiles at him.

Zacharius just nods contently as he sips his wine.

Kersee, quite drunk by now, just nods her head and giggles. “We could go have a good night on the town, maybe pick up some guys. I hear those Char Sara boys are ace. Teehee!”

Neesa giggles. “That would totally rock! I haven’t met boys yet and I get lonely sometimes.”

Dominic pulls out an old E.S.F. jersey and hands it to Zacharius. “Never underestimate the power of the Schwartz!”

Tobias jumps up and down!

“I'm single, I'm single. And, any woman who marries me gets to be the Great Leaders wife!”

Justinian whispers to Rick, “And he is our Great Leader? Man, the E.S.F. families must be worse off than I thought.”

Neesa grins at Tobias.

Barnard comes over to Ashley and Kiso. “Well, what are we waiting for? Let’s head down to the lanes!”

“Pshaw man. Let's do this.” Kiso slides down the stairs, picks out his ball, and sets up his lane before anyone else is down.

Tobias turns to Neesa and winks.

Neesa smiles back then scampers down the stairs behind Kiso. “Gee…that guy is creeping me out, Kiso.”

Barnard pulls out a bowling ball with Snape’s face on it. Snape grumbles and the whole team laughs. “Come’on, Snapey, don’t get upset.”

Kiso chuckles as he throws his first roll, a strike.

Barnard follows up with another strike.

Soon, both players have attracted a large crowd, who are torn between watching the bowling exhibition and getting autographs and taking pictures with the Assegai and E.S.F. players.

Kiso, needing a strike to win, steps up, and rolls a perfect backspinner, taking the perfect game and victory! “Oh my ELUNE!”

“Great game, kid,” says Barnard. “It’s been an honor. Too bad the Mythril Gauntlet stays in Assegai.”

“Shut up, Barnard,” interjects Neesa. “Don’t ruin the moment!”

Kiso take a bag full of silver coins from the alley manager for the perfect game, and offers to order a pizza.

Neesa sits next to him and begins chatting. Some of the other Assegai and E.S.F. players sit down and enjoy the pizza as well.

“Hey, do you think we can beat Qazox?” Neesa asks Kiso.

The various team members murmur their answers, with the general thought to be a 3 all draw.

“Well, kids, you can stay here if you’d like, but a few of us are heading back to Snape’s,” says Riot getting up.

Neesa nods. “I’ll hang out with Kiso for a bit longer.”

Callo winks at her.

On the way out, Dominic suddenly turns around and screams, “Don’t get saucy with me!” He bolts out the door screaming.

Kiso and Neesa sit down to a game of chess, and after three hours of going at it, Neesa emerges the victor, Kiso nearly falling out of his seat in exhaustion. Meanwhile, his parents are making out behind the Pepsi machine, and Kersee is passed out on the bar with a wine glass in her hand.

Stephen de Cobham pats Kersee on the head and hoists her up on his shoulders and carries her away.

“I have to get going now, Kiso,” says Neesa. “This was a lot of fun. We should hang out more.”

Kiso waves at Neesa. “Sure thing, next time I'm in Char Sara, I'll look you up.”

Justinian comes flying out of nowhere, sucker punches Stephen, picks up Kersee and dashes into the getaway car that Rick peels out in.

Stephen lies on the floor in a pool of blood. Neesa screams. “What the hell!” She picks up the unconscious Stephen and carries him out the door.

Snape cusses loudly.

Elves Security Forces contributed to this post. Thank you and have a good night.

Dance 2 Revolution slumped to all but elimination in dramatic style at the Naoki Maeda Memorial Stadium, falling 3 points and 1 game behind 3rd placed Vilita, and behind Anastasiania in 4th after Anastasiania did the demolition job on D2R.

Dance 2 Revolution hosted Quakmybush, whose only loss of the campaign had come from the corresponding fixture. On that occasion, Dance 2 Revolution travelled back with a 2-1 win. This time, however, Dance 2 Revolution managed to leave the stadium with the 3 points, a clean sheet following a resolute defensive display.

The win could have snatched away from D2R at the death, but the referee controversially ended the game early during a Quakmybush attack. The Quakmybush support was understandably furious. Dance 2 Revolution's manager responded to the controversy in the media:

That's football.

He also commented that although he empathises with Quakmybush, he pointed out that they have also pretty much clinched qualification and so the little controversy won't hurt them too much.

The Manager also stated that despite the fact he was proud to have his team performing well in front of D2R legend Naoki Maeda, that he felt that the media attention towards past achievements is unneccesary and is hindering the team's progress.

I haven't had to see much action recently as the Algal States players have managed to avoid injuries, and so have their opponents, but today was a busy day for us stretchers here for the Algal States-Az-cz match.

The game started out nicely for us Algal Staters as we scored the opening goal against the power that is Az-cz. However they quickly answered back on a Pizelkaxrovsky goal.

Soon after that however I was called into the action for the first time, as Pizelkaxrovsky was pretty severly whacked. I carried him over to edge of the pitch and he was out for a few minutes but made his way back onto the pitch a few minutes later. It seemed that he simply had his wind knocked out of him.

However in the 41st minute of the first half a really bad injury occurred. Stanleyinho went up for a header and successfully knocked it into the net, but on the same play he had his legs cut out from under him and tumbled badly. We carried him off the field and he had to be subbed out immediately as his leg was in pretty bad shape. He would almost certainly miss a number of the next Az-cz matches.

Thankfully for the Gnomes they didn't need anymore players carried off the pitch but in the second half two Algal States players collided and went down pretty hard. We had to cart both off of the pitch and in the ensuing confusion the Gnomes put in the third goal of the match. Although both returned to the pitch

While I enjoy the work out my job means that something bad has happened to the players I hope to go back to not working after this match.

Amda-Mo: Well the Gnomes continued their undefeated run 3-1 over Algal States, but this victory came at a fairly steep price.

Lur-Mn: Indeed, once again the Gnomes have lost a starting striker with Stanleyinho going down in injury.

Amda-Mo: What's the word on his injury?

Lur-Mn: It looks pretty bad. It looks like he might not be back till the Liverpool England match. Maybe if we're lucky Okielahoma. And if things go poorly maybe not even in time for the cup itself.

Amda-Mo: What do you think of keeping the whole squad playing with that many qualfiers left to play and qualification already clinched?

Lur-Mn: Well there's too many matches to ease off, but clearly there should be some rotation so that all the players get to see pitch time and to avoid injuries. But we need to keep players fresh. We've still got four matches, plus a friendly left to go before the cup proper.

Amda-Mo: What other thoughts do you have on the match today?

Lur-Mn: Allowing Algal States to score first was a bit disturbing. Our defense hasn't been as good this half. Our offense is still clicking but we're going to want to see more defense these last five matches. This is excusable against Sel Appa or Algal States, but against teams in the cup proper, it won't be enough.

Amda-Mo: Next up is Tocapa. Thoughts?

Lur-Mn: I expect the team to pull it back a bit. We might try some other formations and give some new players starts, so expect it to be a bit ugly for a home match against Tocapa. But considering that it is Tocapa coming to Knights Coliseum expect the Gnomes to still come out on top say 2-0.

THE MONASTIC TIMES

NATION WAKES UP TO FIRST PLACE
MFA Pronounces itself 'pleased'


By Fr. Nicholas the Scribe

Despite the long period of silence caused by virtually the entire population of the Archregimancy going on a long pilgrimage to a very faraway place, the nation today woke up to the fact that they were heading a group - featuring Starblaydia - despite a lack of a roster or any direct involvement in the day to day activity of the tournament.

Coach Fr. David the Water Drinker was quoted as stressing that total team anonymity had again benefitted the squad: "they can't scout you if they don't know who you are".

"I think you can assume the Monastic Football Association is pleased" said a senior archimandrite, speaking on condition of anonymity, shortly before the nation went on another very long pilgrimage, again minimising the chance that anyone in the Archregimancy will be able to react to ongoing football events.

THE HOLY EMPIRE HERALD

DREAM VORTEX LIFTS BRIEFLY
Holy Empire With Strong Hope of World Cup Qualification

By Anna Comneno

The dream vortex that has been hampering communication between the Dreamed Realm and Ordinary Reality for over a week briefly lifted last night, allowing Herald staffers to catch up with news from beyond the Empire.

Perhaps the greatest suprise is that the Imperial football squad finds itself in a potential World Cup qualification spot, five points ahead of fourth-placed Turori with only four matches left to play.

Imperial citizens were vaguely aware that football matches have been taking place inside the Imperial Hippodrome in Alasdairopolis, but given the impact of the vortex on everyday life in the Empire, few of us perhaps appreciated just how well the team was doing.

Holy Empire Football Association officials are said to be desperately scrambling to find out the identity of their own team members in the hope that they would be able to post a roster should the squad continue their shock run towards qualifying for the World Cup proper for the first time since World Cup 4.

After the daily training of Cafundéu’s National Team, the most important members of the country’s football confederation and members of the team’s staff arranged a meeting to discuss about the next games. They decided to talk inside the tactics room, a place where the coach Franz Braddock shows his game strategy to the players.

One by one the guests enter. First, the president of the confederation, the Counselor-Minister of Sports Samuel Makas. After him, the governor of the Lasft state Asano Pender, five members of the city council, members of the confederation and Petardos S/A’s coach Caio Meback. Then, the staff members enter. Franz Braddock is the last one to enter, closing the door.

The room is disorganized, with broken chairs and holes in the roof. “At least the air conditioning is working”, says Caio Meback. Near the door the guests can see details of tactics written in a blackboard, with a piece of paper with these things written: “For Mr. Braddock - Spaam’s tactics – please read carefully.” The paper is signed by Pai Oxossi, Cafundéu’s spy.

When everyone gets a place in the room, the meeting starts, and Samuel Makas is the first to talk.

“Before everything, I must say that I’m very pleased by our national team’s campaign, you’re making wonderful games so far.”

“Thanks, counselor”, says Braddock, “it’s very good to see our work appreciated. But I don’t think that you arranged this meeting for this. You’re here to talk about our next two games.”

“Yes, I know. I must say that our next game will be the most important one. What are your plans for it?”

“You can see them in the blackboard, counselor. We saw their games and we know how they play. We’re more than ready.”

Before the counselor-minister could answer, the coach of Petardos S/A Caio Meback asks a question to Braddock:

“You already decided the starting eleven, didn’t you?”

“Yes. I’ll use Julio Vargas again in the goalkeeper position.”

“Surely the right choice.” - it is clear that Caio said it just because Vargas plays for his team, but Braddock ignores it and continues to talk.

“The defense will be composed by Becão and Sávio Ferrari, and the wing-backs will be Cafézinho and Ray Kirs.”

“Why not use Vandick for this game, Franz?” – asks the governor Asano Pender.

“He is suspended. Hopefully Cafézinho can perform well in his place.” – then, after a short break, he continues – “Anormal is my first choice in the midfield.”

“It couldn’t be different. I can say that he is the best player of the whole squad.” – comments the assistant coach João Canabrava.

“I wouldn’t be certain of that, João. You know that Ganz Ijak is the most important player of the team right now.” – replies Caio, defending a player of his team again, before being interrupted by Franz Braddock.

“This is not the place to discuss these things. Priotto and Kliek will compose the midfield, although...” – he can’t finish his phrase, as Samuel interrupts him.

“Four-three-three? Is this your formation? You’re crazy!”

“Let me finish, counselor. I was going to say that I will use three midfielders, although I’ll use Heitor as a more defensive attacker, reaching the midfield more often. It’ll work, believe on me.”

“He’s a good player, it won’t be difficult for him.” – concludes Canabrava.

“I guess that you’ll use the brothers in the attack, won’t you? Good choice!” – says Caio, happy, as the Ijak brothers play in his team.

“Yes, I’ll use Ganz and Ernesto in the attack.”

There's a moment of silence in the room. After it, Braddock continues talking:

“Now talking about another thing, governor, can I ask you a question? How many tickets were sold for the game here in Lasft?”

“All the eighty thousand, plus the twenty thousand of the new stands, that were built especially for this game.”

“Good. It’s good to have a filled stadium, mainly when they are supporters of our country. And what about the referee for this game?”

The president of the confederation answers: “It was already defined. Will be Damian the Disciplinarian, of The Archregimancy. Tough one, we have to avoid fouling the opponents.”

“I understand.”

Samuel continues: “After this game, we’ll have a friendly. Will you use the main team?”

“Of course not.” - answers Franz - “We and the players will travel directly to Salwinia. Serginho Mallandro will stay here in Cafundéu, going to São José before the game. He’ll coach our national “B” team in the game against La Provincia di Roma. Our second team is very strong, and this will be a good moment to test some young players.”

“A entertainer will coach Cafundéu’s national team in this friendly?” – asks one of the confederation members, surprised by the situation.

“Wait, I’ll coach Cafundéu’s national team?” – asks Serginho Mallandro, surprised too.

“Yes. Mallandro will coach the team in the friendly, as we need to prepare ourselves for the last games.”

“Understandable.” - says Samuel – “As it is a friendly game, Luís Fernando Aragão will whistle this game. He is one of the best referees of our country.”

“So, everything is ready for these last games in the World Cup qualifiers?” – asks the governor.

“Yes, everything is ready.” – answers Franz.

“So, thanks for the meeting, but that's all. Goodbye.”

All the guests start to leave the room, one by one. Franz Braddock is the last one to leave, closing the door and hoping to see good performances of Cafundéu in the last games.

<OOC - have an unexpected 10 mins for an RP; thought I'd give people a better IC reason for my recent silence, though in RL the real reason is that I'm visiting family for the first time in 2 years>

THE GREAT PILGRIMAGE

Notes from a wandering monk

And thus it has come to pass that we have left the former place, and now wander to another place, though we have passed by other places along the way.

I long to learn of how our brave footballing monks are coping with the mighty effort of World Cup qualification, but this Great Pilgrimage has swept the Archregimancy with a mighty fervour for Orthodoxy, and we travel in hope of seeing as many Holy Relics as possible.

Already I have personally venerated The Holy Lance, the Site of the Third Finding of the Head of St. John the Forerunner, the left kneecap of St. Alban the Protomartyr of Britain, the Holy Icon of St. Alexander the Patriarch Made Without Feet, and enough fragments of the True Cross to build Noah's Ark (I might have also seen part of Noah's Ark, but one block of deteriorating wood looks very much like another after months of pilgrimage, however holy).

Once every hundred years this might pilgrimage calls us all forth from our monasteries, and I am most proud of this unique part of our cultural heritage, even if it means the Dreamed Stadium must be unusually empty for home matches. I do wish I knew the score of the Starblaydia match (or matches.... we might have played them twice by now), but I'd much rather be honouring the Saints.

I believe that tomorrow my small group shall be given the opportunity to venerate the Sermon Book of St. John Chrysostom. I can hardly wait.

Meanwhile the Wentland team was delayed for its next match. Apparently they had difficulty in crossing airspace over the Archregimancy, as the whole country was looking for the Head of St. John the Forerunner. Again.

Norman Hacker was incandescent - "why don't they put it in a bloody box?" - but Lennie Newton was more relaxed. "It's always in the last place you look."

sorry

Hello Netizens,

I did tell about Han Tje-Mhi in my last blog-entry. Apparently the ASR reads my blog as well, or it was coincidence, but Han was nominated for the Young Orange-Blues and got his first match minutes in a test match. Congrats or in Ly: Lha ej su!

I followed my duty to a much weirder place than Selekestan or Nhi Ly: Sike kali. Sike is horrible. All other cities have a code of behaviour, which is closely defined by the different cultures... Sike however is not a city but rather a group of people from all kalesa'ny who are supposed to run the country. This of course means there is nothing like a dominant culture and one always needs to assess what is adequate in any given situation. But being in Sike also had advantages: I watched the match live! Yeah, the Sekhikablogger made it to a real match. The match against Voskadouria did not really take place in Sike but in the city of Hoiukeh Ajuei but that was close enough to be able to watch a match. The ASR figured apparently no one would be interested in watching a match of the Orange-Blues against such a chanceless opponent. Or the Revja complained because nearly no match takes place in Revjan territory. I wonder whether any Voskadourians knew the match took place. There would be more fans of the away team if a H10SR team plays on the other end of the nation.

The match started a bit slow, Voskadouria tried to emulate our favorite League team. No, I do not mean Hetaki. Asaikivelemanakere Ralaseletikivenemaratede's Orange-Blues struggled against the Defense, but when Na~eta Kii had some good scenes and eventually striker Jemeru Kansu scored the 1:0, the voskadourian coach realzed this would lead to a trouncing despite the Karela and Kiiried to a hank~hilan formation. This did suprise the Orange-Blues, the 1:1 by Mesu Kasumai happened due to a misunderstanding in the rejistanian defense (I won't use 'defense' to indicate their takilness). However the Orange-Blues could capitalize the fact that the Voskadourian defense was weakened rather well. 3 goals and numerous good chances were a proof for that. The last goal of the match, the 4:2 by the Voskarian winger Matsu Hanzu was also highlighting something interesting, the fans of the Orange-Blues do no longer think conceding 2 goals while scoring 4 is a disgrace. Apparently the legacy of the Karelan government is eventually no longer imminent enough to cause "lehiju'ny"-chants.

The Crimson Blade

de Cobham: I’m in!

Despite having suffered a broken nose after getting attacked by a couple of Elves Security Forces players last week in Capri, E.S.F., Assegai Developments forward Stephen de Cobham was given the green light to play against The Mushroom Kingship in Assegai’s next World Cup XXXII qualifier.

“’Tis just a flesh wound,” muttered de Cobham with smirk. “It’ll take a lot to keep me from being there for my nation and my team.”

Although there was a lot of initial confusion surrounding the incident where de Cobham’s nose was broken, he received an apology from an E.S.F. player and that, he said, is good enough for him.

“I don’t care much for the rest of their team, but I trust this person and I got their word and that’s all I need,” he said.

-----

“Nothing’s changed,” said Assegai midfielder and team captain Ashley Riot regarding the extended period between their last game and their match against The Mushroom Kingship. “We still love cream of mushroom and we plan to serve some tonight.”

When asked if the team was already thinking about the upcoming game with Qazox, Riot laughed a bit, saying, “We’re not exactly ‘worried’ about Qazox. If anyone should be worried, it should be them. They have a lot more to lose than us.”

Meanwhile, Assegai goalie Edward van de Beauchamp said that the extended layover allowed him to completely rid himself of the flu strain, which was still bothering him until a few days ago.

“Yeah, we were cleared to play initially, but some of us were still a bit under the weather, y’know? I’m well-rested now and ready to take on The Mushroom Kingship,” he said. “Bring them on!”

Tonight’s Game

http://spaam.mrdrake.net/flags/the_mushroom_kingship.png The Mushroom Kingship
Vs.
http://spaam.mrdrake.net/flags/assegai_developments.png Assegai Developments

Article by Mikaela Eyre

Do you believe in miracles?! YES!!!!!!!!

MD 16 cut off, finally.

The Daily Quak
The Clinch Was a Sinch


The Quakmybush National Soccer Team continued their World Cup 32 Qualifying run with a match against Alexandrian Ptolemais. The Sharks would clinch a qualifying spot with a win. Allan Brooks started in place of Cam Carroll who is a bit tired. The Sharks came out the extremely loud crowd. They did not disappoint. In the 13th minute Jon Fields broke in all alone and fired a shot top corner, 1-0 Quakmybush. Then, in the 24th minute Cory Sorley took a shot from about 20 feet outside the box that found its way in the net. The score was 2-0 going into the second half. The Sharks came out more defensively in the second half, however Ryan Fret still managed to score two times, once in the 65th minute and once in the 78th minute. The Sharks won the game 4-0. But the bigger story was them clinching a birth in the World Cup.

Quakmybush - 4
Fields 13' Sorley 24' Fret 65' 78'

Alexandrian Ptolemais - 0
None

We caught up with Greg Hughes as asked him about the game.

"We'll, now that we've clinched our bench players will get more playing time, and hopefully score some goals."

"How do you think the team has been playing?"

"Well, this is the first time that we won't have to fight on the last day for a qualifying spot, so, it's perfect.

Goal Scorers
Sorley - 14
Fields - 13
Fret - 6
Graves - 3
Plett, Miller, Martin, Baker, Ralegigh - 1

Article By: Rick Juras

The Crimson Blade

Cream of Mushroom is Served; Qazox is Next

The Mushroom Kingship — Assegai Developments midfielder and team captain Ashley Riot predicted his team would serve cream of mushroom tonight and, thanks to a blazing goal by forward Severus Snape, they did.

Playing inspired football, the Riskbreakers matched The Mushroom Kingship on the field, battling for every ball and bounce, eventually tiring out their opponents and ending the game on a high note, with a barrage of shots-on-goal.

Also playing extremely well was Assegai goalie Edward van de Beauchamp, who notched his second shutout in the qualifying round, lowering his goals-against-average to 1.54. Scrambling to stop difficult shots and nullifying dangerous plays before they could materialize, van de Beauchamp was everywhere and was a huge factor in his team’s victory.

Snape, who has recently been on a tear, scored in the 64th minute of play. The goal, a point-blank net-ripping blast, was the culmination of a series of plays that dissected The Mushroom Kingship’s defense, threatening their net until finally Snape dragged the ball past a defender and ran up to the goalie and beat him with a couple of shakes.

With the win, Assegai Developments improves their record to 7 wins, 2 draws and 3 losses for 14 points and maintains their hope of qualifying to the Proper. Up next, however, is the home stretch against the toughest teams in the group.

First up is the rematch with new rivals Qazox, who have vexed Assegai in the past and have constantly shown a variable level of disrespect for the Riskbreakers. A win for Assegai would be—for lack of a better term—huge.

Article by Mikaela Eyre

Game Summary

http://spaam.mrdrake.net/flags/the_mushroom_kingship.png The Mushroom Kingship 0
http://spaam.mrdrake.net/flags/assegai_developments.png Assegai Developments 1

[TMK]
None

[AD]
Severus Snape (64’)

Edward van de Beauchamp [AD] earns his second shutout of qualifying

<symbol of the “Tynelian Nightly Sporting News with Jeff Jefferson” looms in the background>

Jeff Jefferson: Well lets move on to the World Cup now. Today Tynelia struggled some and needed a pair of late goals to rally and beat Dorian & Sonya 2-1 on goals from Duncan MacDougal and Jay Masterson in the second half. We nearly saw the upset you were warning everyone about Dinah.

Dinah Miller: Yes the team was a bit sluggish to start and D&S took advantage at home to get out to an early lead before the late rally. Clearly the team was looking ahead to the next match against Cuation. Fortunately Coach Billington got them on track in time to get the full three points.

Tom Thompson: Yeah and Yafor 2 lost so they’re done.

Dinah: Not quite Tom but it would take a lot of things to go their way to advance at this point.
Jeff: And now despite our being up four points on Cuation right now as we took advantage of their bye everything comes down to this next match.

Dinah: That’s right Jeff. Oddly enough Tynelia looks to avenge its one and only shutout in group play on the road against Cuation this time around. A win puts Tynelia up by seven points with three matchdays left. A loss and Tynelia will have to find a way to take points off Jerusalem again. A draw and we still have some work to do as Cuation would have a match in hand still and would have played the other three of the top four seeds in the group while we’d be facing Jeruselem.

Tom: Yeah usually we get more than one shutout at the halfway point of the first half of group play. The offense is going crazy this cup.

Jeff: All sorts of scoring records are going down. In fact Tynelia has already set a record for most goals scored in group play…and they still have three more matches left.

Dinah: This has been a stunning turnaround from the usual gameplan. In fact this is one of the poorer defensive efforts to date with few shutouts of our own this Cup. If not for the scoring explosion so far Tynelia would be really hurting this cup, good timing I have to say.

Jeff: So what do you think about the team’s chances going on the road?

Dinah: It will be tough I think, Tynelia has yet to show that they can beat the top teams on the road. All our big wins to date have been at home so a win here would be another first. Then there is the fact that we’ll be looking to avenge the one shutout to date. It should be another close game.

Tom: How about Bettia, we’re only four points behind them and they have a bye. Imagine if we could actually catch and pass them up!

Dinah: Let’s worry about beating Cuation and not Bettia. Sure we both have Jerusalem left on the schedules but I highly doubt we’ll be able to pick up four points with only three matches each left. They would really have to fall apart at the finish for that to happen and Bettia is too good for that.

Jeff: <listens to something on his earpiece> Oh my god! The producers have just told me someone’s made a bomb threat. We have to get out of here now!

Tom: <screams like a little girl>

Dinah: A bomb? Who would want to bomb us?!?

<all three sprint out of their chairs and run off camera>

<MEANWHILE- outside Matt Simms sits in his car watching the studio building>

Try to make a fool of me will they? Let that bitch get away with assaulting me. Ignoring my demands! Ignoring my lawsuits. Run around little mic. No more of that sorry excuse for a sport getting any more atrtime. I’m a freaking hero of the people for stopping this. Yeah I should get a medal! Matt smiles to himself as he starts his car and drives past the rapidly emptying building before anyone notices.

Ninety-Nine And Out
'GNDN', Starblaydi legend, dies

A man remembered more for his management than his playing days, Guylain N'Dumbu-Nsungu (http://ns.goobergunch.net/wiki/index.php/Guylain_N%27Dumbu-Nsungu) passed away in his sleep this week at the grand old age of ninety-nine. He was the joint-oldest ex-international player, along with goalkeeper Boaz Myhill and midfielder Matthew Young. He wore the number 20 shirt in Starblaydia's first ever attempt to qualify for the World Cup, way back some 68 years ago in World Cup 15. In his six appearances in those Qualifiers he scored three times: in a three-nil win against Lemmitania, the fifth of a magnificent, glorious 5-1 victory over Dance 2 Revolution (then one of the higher-ranked teams in the world, with Starblaydia at a lowly 115th) and finally another against the Revolutionaries in a 1-1 draw at the end of the campaign. His other goal came against Nojika in the second Atlantian Oceania Cup of Association Football.

After scoring his goals for Starblaydia - made difficult by his international debut at the age of thirty-one - Guylain sat back, relaxed, and was made manager of the Starblaydia Under-21s. After some neat successes which dragged the senior Starblaydi side up the World Rankings, the senior team's Manager, Jean-Paul Georges-Ringeaux, was sacked. Guy stepped up to the plate and was promoted to the position of National Manager.

Although his substitution-making left a lot to be desired in most people's minds, Guy remained in firm control of the National side, despite being beset on nearly all sides by notables including Nikola "Laser" Lazerevski, Simeone Di Bradini and Starblaydi Minister for Sport and Double-Posts Lord Rikaard Van Honjiik. It was ultimately his World Cup Finals record in World Cup 21 that saw him forced out of his post. After failing to win a match against Total n Utter Insanity, Lovisa or South Osettia, Guy left his job by 'mutual consent'. In essence, he quit at the same time as being sacked.

At the age of fifty-nine he applied, and was accepted, for the job of managing the Hypocria national team. He signed a four-year contract, giving him time to mould a squad of Hypocrian players to send to World Cup 23 and its pre-tournament Baptism of Fire warm-up. In action, he took Hypocria to 3rd-Place at the Baptism of Fire, beating Vtorbetin 2-1 in Extra Time. A reasonable Qualifying campaign for the World Cup saw his contract extended and in the subsequent 9th AOCAF, Guylain's Hypocria side defeated his own country in the Quarter-Finals the competition on penalties, though Starblaydi football fans blamed the Streetian refereeing team for keeping the match at to a 1-1 scoreline, where they felt they were denied a number of fairly-made goals.

Despite being a Hypocrian hero for taking his team to the final of AOCAF 9, Guylain's Hyppos performed awfully in the Qualifiers for World Cup 24 and he was sacked from his post with two qualifying games to go as Hypocria sat rock bottom of Group Seven, replaced by Dave Wilson, the Sarzonian coach who led the Stars to World Cup glory in World Cup 22.

Guylain continued to take an role in football, this time from behind the scenes at his beloved Jhanna City, where he was made a non-executive Director of the club on his seventieth birthday.




Group 9: GP W D L GF GA GD P
The Archregimancy 13 10 2 1 34 9 +25 32
Starblaydia 12 9 3 0 33 9 +24 30
Fort Europe 13 8 2 3 24 17 +7 26
------------------ -- -- - -- -- -- --- --
Northern Caesarea 13 8 1 4 30 17 +13 25
Rordia 12 5 3 4 21 15 +6 18
Raging Penguins 12 4 0 8 17 22 -5 12 E
Harlesburg 13 2 2 9 15 28 -13 8 E
Spaamanian Plijous 12 3 1 8 18 31 -13 7 E
Schnabo 12 0 0 12 4 50 -46 0 E


Starblaydia RPs in World Cup 32
Starblaydia Roster (http://forums.jolt.co.uk/showpost.php?p=12044387&postcount=8)
Dawn (http://forums.jolt.co.uk/showpost.php?p=11989617&postcount=3) (Pre-Cup)
Immortal Souls (http://forums.jolt.co.uk/showpost.php?p=12070926&postcount=65)
Mixing Metaphors (http://forums.jolt.co.uk/showpost.php?p=12080743&postcount=112)
Predator Rajko (http://forums.jolt.co.uk/showpost.php?p=12087269&postcount=147)
99 And Out

http://i46.photobucket.com/albums/f141/DarthBunny/ns_stuff/sg-title.png
Giant Penguin Causes Chaos

http://i46.photobucket.com/albums/f141/DarthBunny/pengzilla.jpg
Giant penguin sighting near the Big Iron Tower of Uhm on the Isle of Uhm

A giant penguin caused a major chaos on the Isle of Uhm over the last few months. Luckily it stayed away from the Unity Stadium, so Ropa-Topia's home matches for the world cup qualification could still be played, but the penguin completely destroyed the building of the RTSA's Sports Gazette. Not only was it impossible to print the paper edition of this newspaper for several months, the building also housed the internet servers with the Sport Gazette's website and the RTSA is still looking for a new host for this popular website.

The paper edition is back though (as you probably already noticed, as you are reading it now) and now we can finally report again on the results of the Ropa-Topian national football team.

Played matches:
MD2: Bostopia - 1-1 - Ropa-Topia
MD3: Ropa-Topia - 3-0 - The HURD
MD4: Nomadasia - 1-4 - Ropa-Topia
MD5: Krytenia - 3-2 - Ropa-Topia
MD6: Ropa-Topia - 3-5 - Commerce Heights
MD7: Ropa-Topia - 2-3 - Alasdair I Frosticus
MD8: Elves Security Forces - 2-2 - Ropa-Topia

MD10: Ropa-Topia - 1-0 - Turori

MD12: Ropa-Topia - 3-2 - Bostopia
MD13: The HURD - 2-3 - Ropa-Topia
MD14: Ropa-Topia - 2-3 - Nomadasia
MD15: Ropa-Topia - 2-4 - Krytenia
MD16: Commerce Heights - 2-1 - Ropa-Topia

Upcoming matches:
MD17: Alasdair I Frosticus - Ropa-Topia
MD18: Ropa-Topia - Elves Security Forces

MD20: Turori - Ropa-Topia

CAFUNDÉU WINS AND WILL PROBABLY QUALIFY

http://us.news1.yimg.com/us.yimg.com/i/fifa/gen/fifa/20040426/i/1109019976.jpg
Cafundéu's new strategy worked well

Playing another game at home, Cafundéu was able to defeat the powerful team of Spaam. The striker Ganz Ijak made another wondeful game, scoring three goals in one game, being decisive. The changes that Braddock made in the team made the team more offensive, but because of them the team lost the ball control in the wings, and the full-backs didn’t have a good game. But is the result what matters, so Cafundéu can be proud of it, as can be qualified in the next round, even not playing.

Now, with eleven points in front of Spaam, but with more played games, Cafundéu just needs one victory in the last three games. But, if Spaam loses just one game of its next four, Cafundéu will be qualified. So, the team is in a very good situation and all the supporters are preparing themselves to commemorate. Cafundéu’s first team will now travel to Salwinia, while the “B” squad of Cafundéu will stay in the country and play against La Provincia di Roma in a friendly, coached by the entertainer Serginho Mallandro.

THE GAME
The stadium was filled, so the players had to play under a lot of pressure. Cafundéu started to game more offensive than usual, trying to pass the ball in the centre of the field, so the full-back weren’t too used, but sometimes they created some plays. Spaam controlled the ball possession in the few minutes, finding good spaces to play, but soon the home team’s defense was able to block the opponents. 2nd minute: A Spaam’s attacker received the ball in the left side of the field and invaded the area, shooting to the goal. But Vargas was well positioned and could save.

5th minute: Becão took the ball from an opponent attacker and created a good chance for Cafundéu starting a counterattack. The ball reached Heitor who dribbled an opponent and passed to Ernesto Ijak who was inside the area, He received the ball and shot, but sent the ball over the bar. 8th minute: Spaam’s defense made a huge mistake and Kliek got the ball, passing it to Ganz Ijak. The striker received it, dribbled a defender and shot to the goal. The ball entered in the right side of the goal and Cafundéu scored.

10th minute: Spaam replied after suffering a fast goal. A midfielder got the ball in the midfield and reached the right wing, crossing the ball to the area. One winger headed it, but the ball hit the post. The players of Cafundéu didn’t get the rebound and an attacker of Spaam headed it, this time scoring the goal. After two fast goals, the game continued very exciting. 13th minute: Anormal received the ball in the midfield, but couldn’t dribble the opponent and had to pass to Heitor, who shot from outside the area and missed the goal.

16th minute: A defender of Spaam noticed the Cafundéu’s wings were unprotected and went to the left wing, running and soon reaching the midfield. He passed the ball to a midfielder, who tried to invade the area, but was blocked by Anormal, who took the ball back easily. 18th minute: Vandick received the ball from Sávio Ferrari, but didn’t find space to run, so he passed to Priotto. The defensive midfielder reached the entrance of the area and tried to score shooting from there. The shot was very good, but the goalkeeper was able to make a great save.

22nd minute: Anormal received the ball and passed it to Kliek, who reached the attacking area. Spaam’s players chased him, but he could pass the ball to Ernesto Ijak, who invaded the area and shot. The goalkeeper made a good save, but gave the rebound to Ganz Ijak, who shot too. But his shot wasn’t very good and he sent the ball over the bar. 25th minute: Spaam made a good attack reaching the area with a midfielder. He tried to dribble Becão, but lost control of the ball and fell in the area, asking for a penalty. The referee discovered that he was lying and showed him a red card, saying that to lie is a sin.

http://us.news1.yimg.com/us.yimg.com/i/fifa/gen/fifa/20040422/i/585816860.jpg
Game had few fouls, but the referee was rigorous

29th minute: Ray Kirs was able to start a good play in the left side of the field, passing the ball later to Priotto, who sent it to the area. Heitor got it, dribbling a defender, but the goalkeeper slided in his legs and got the ball back. 33rd minute: Spaam started a fast counterattack, reaching the entrance of the area. An attacker was with the ball, but he wasn’t able to invade the area. So, he decided to shot, missing the goal and the chance to score.

36th minute: Cafundéu started a fast attack, this time with Kliek, who reached the attacking area and passed the ball to Ganz Ijak. He dribbled an opponent and invaded the area. The goalkeeper tried to take the ball back, but Ganz just hit the ball and it went over the goalkeeper, entering in the goal. After the second goal, Cafundéu’s supporters started to sing and shout, trying to help the team. 40th minute: Cafundéu had a corner. Kliek took it and Becão headed, but the ball went wide.

42nd minute: Becão fouled an opponent and received the yellow card. The free-kick was dangerous, but the midfielder who took it made a bad shot and the ball went wide. 45th minute: Spaam had the last chance of the first half, when Sávio Ferrari made a mistake and a winger got the ball. Ray Kirs couldn’t take the ball and the opponent invaded the area. He tried to shot, but Becão appeared in front of him and took the ball, shooting it to safety. The monk ended the first half.

Seeing that the team was playing well, but would probably suffer many strong attacks, the coach Franz Braddock decided to put Manuel Padaria in Ernesto Ijak’s place. Spaam’s coach made changes in his team too, but trying to make the team more offensive, as he needed the result very much. The second half started less exciting than the first, but soon the goal chances appeared. 3rd minute: Vandick got the ball and sent it to the attack. Heitor received and tried to score shooting near the entrance of the area. The ball made a curve and was close to enter, but it hit the bar and left the playing field.

7th minute: Spaam attacked in numbers. Cafundéu’s defense couldn’t stop this strong attack, and soon they reached the area. An attacker got the ball and had a great chance to score in front of the goalkeeper, but he shot the ball badly and it hit the goalkeeper. Becão took the rebound and sent the ball to safety. 10th minute: Spaam attacked again, this time reaching the attack with a midfielder. Manuel Padaria fouled him before he could reach the attack. Padaria received the yellow card. The midfielder shot the free kick in the wall.

12th minute: Anormal got the ball, knocked down an opponent and passed to Kliek, who controlled the ball and sent it to the area. Ganz Ijak jumped and headed the ball to the goal, but the goalkeeper had good reflexes and sent it for a corner. Vandick took the corner, but a defender got the ball. After suffering a pressure in the first minutes of the second half, Cafundéu was retaining the control of the match. The coach Franz Braddock decided to put Brahma in Heitor’s place.

http://us.news1.yimg.com/us.yimg.com/i/fifa/en/pf/20011221/i/604839985.jpg
Supporters filled the Obelisco Monumental to see the game

15th minute: Ganz Ijak received the ball in the attacking area and was going to invade the area when was fouled by a defender, who received the yellow card. Vandick took the free kick, but he sent the ball over the bar, losing a good chance to score the third goal of Cafundéu. 18th minute: A Spaam player was in the midfield. He dribbled Priotto and sent the ball to the area. An attacker headed the ball to the goal, but Vargas made an excellent save, holding the ball.

21st minute: Ray Kirs made a good play in the left wing and passed the ball to Priotto, who ran to the attack. Then, he passed the ball to Brahma, who invaded the area and shot. The goalkeeper made a very good save. 25th minute: Spaam started a counterattack after Ganz missed a shot. A midfielder got the ball and reached the entrance of the area, trying to score from a long range shot. But his shot wasn’t very good and he missed the goal. 27th minute: Priotto was fouled by an opponent, who received the yellow card and couldn’t complain. The referee was very rigorous, although the game wasn’t violent.

30th minute: Anormal received the attack, but he didn’t want to attack. He made a long range pass to Ganz Ijak, who received the ball, dribbled a defender and shot to the goal, but he sent the ball wide. 34th minute: A winger of Spaam made a good play, finding a team mate in a good position, so he passed the ball to him. The player controlled the ball, but Sávio Ferrari came fast to tackle the ball. The opponent even tried to get the ball back, bu Becão took the ball and sent it to the attack, clearing the danger.

36th minute: Cafundéu killed the game in a fast play, started by Priotto. The defensive midfielder was well positioned with the ball. Kliek asked the ball, but Priotto decided to invade the area. The defenders thought that he would pass the ball, so were surprised and couldn’t react. Priotto shot, but the goalkeeper made a good save. Unfortunately for him, he gave the rebound to Ganz Ijak, who shot and score the goal of the victory. After the goal, Franz Braddock put Menzir in Anormal’s place and retreated the team to defend more. Spaam was hoping to score.

40th minute: Spaam tried to attack using the right wing. The winger reached the midfield, sending the ball directly to the area. One of the attackers headed it, but Vargas sent it for a corner. After the corner, Becão took the ball and sent it to the attacking area of Cafundéu. 44th minute: Kliek received the ball and decided to shot from outside the area, sending the ball wide and missing the last goal chance of the whole game. The game ended, and Cafundéu’s supporters commemorated the good victory.

After the game, Heitor talked with the media: “This result was one of the most important ones, as our opponent was a very strong team which is trying to get a place in the World Cup. Now, we know that we have a great chance to qualify, as we just need more two points.” Ganz Ijak also talked: “This was one of my best performances. To score three goals in a game is very difficult, so I know that this day is special. Thanks to the coach, to my team mates and to my wife and family.” Manuel Padaria said few things to a local newspaper: “We’ll be probably going to the World Cup, so it’s a very important moment of my career and...” he started to cry, so had to stop his interview.

The coach Franz Braddock was very happy with the good result today too. “If you ask anyone here today which was the better team, the yellow or the white, this person will surely say that the yellow was superior. We showed a very good football today and we deserved this victory. Now we’ll concentrate ourselves to get the victory, as it’ll qualify us. And I’ll watch our friendly by the television, as many of the invited players can get a chance in the national team soon.”

http://us.news1.yimg.com/us.yimg.com/i/fifa/gen/fifa/20040422/i/2595655068.jpg
Spaam's players left the game disappointed

CAFUNDÉU 3x1 SPAAM

Place: Obelisco Monumental, in Lasft.
Attendance: 100,000(full).
Referee: Damian the Disciplinarian(The Archregimancy).
Man of the Match: Ganz Ijak(Cafundéu).

http://spaam.mrdrake.net/flags/cafundeu.png CAFUNDÉU: Vargas, Cafézinho, Kirs, Becão and Sávio Ferrari; Anormal(Menzir), Priotto and Kliek; Heitor(Brahma), Ernesto Ijak(Manuel Padaria) and Ganz Ijak.
Coach: Franz Braddock.

http://spaam.mrdrake.net/flags/spaam.png SPAAM: no team released.

Ratings:
10- Ganz Ijak.
9- Vargas, Kliek and Priotto.
8- Becão, Anormal and Manuel Padaria.
7- Sávio Ferrari, Heitor and Ernesto Ijak.
6- Vandick, Brahma, Menzir and Kirs.

GOALS: CAFUNDÉU: Ganz Ijak 8’/36’/81’.
SPAAM: An attacker 10’.

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Cafundéu – friendly’s formation: Matogrosso, Coelho, Covas and Brunnés; Paulo, Roosevelt, Resitiv, Metir and Kimball; Coqueiral and Kemp.
Coach: Serginho Mallandro.
Style of +2

Match’s Referee: Luiz Fernando Aragão.

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Goalscorers after 13 games:
10- Ganz Ijak.
3- Heitor and Anormal.
1- Kirs, Brahma, Becão, Kliek and Ernesto Ijak.

“Good afternoon, fans of Assegai Developments football. This is Mikaela Eyre reporting live from Qazox City, where the Riskbreakers of Assegai are currently practicing in preparation for tonight’s important World Cup XXXII qualifier.

“Assegai comes to Qazox riding a wave of success, having won their last four matches and foaming at the mouth to finally defeat Qazox, a team that has tormented the Riskbreakers several times in the past.

“Earlier, we spoke to Assegai forward Samantha Neesa and midfielder Alys Spicer, who spoke briefly about the win over The Mushroom Kingship and tonight’s game with Qazox.”

The screen shows Neesa in a ponytail wearing an Assegai Developments sports bra.

“We were thoroughly satisfied with our performance in the game with The Mushroom Kingship,” she chirps. “We felt we could beat them and proving it like we did is a huge boost in our resolve. Remember, this is not a case of confidence, because we don’t lack any of that, but a win like that propels us to continue on this road we are blazing.”

The screen switches to show Spicer in pigtails also wearing an Assegai Developments sports bra.

“A little bit of luck and a whole lot of determination is what made the difference in our win over The Mushroom Kingship,” she says calmly. “I mean, we knew they were going to put up a fight, playing at home and all. So, we went out there looking to choke out their passing routes and force them to play defensively. Once we accomplished that, it was a case of pummeling them until we broke that wall down. As you saw, one goal was enough, although it would have been nice to add a couple more.”

The screen switches back to Neesa.

“We didn’t finish so well against Qazox last time,” she says in a somber tone. “I mean, it was a huge improvement over the monumental thrashing from the last World Cup. You know…we mention that a lot. You’re probably thinking that we still haven’t gotten over that loss. Well, the sting of the loss has tuned into a dull pain, but what still bothers us is their complete lack of respect for our team and supporters. Now, we get one more crack at them and it has become our focus…our goal…to defeat them.”

The screen shows Spicer thinking deeply then staring directly at the screen.

“Yeah, we’re ready for Qazox,” she says defiantly. “We came close to beating them last time and they barely escaped our grasp with that late goal. Our team has significantly improved since then and I think we’re finally due to beat them.”

The screen switches back to Neesa, who looks upset.

“I really don’t like the Qazox squad,” she says angrily. “They remind me a lot of the Elves Security Forces team, and you know our history—a fierce rivalry. The Qazox squad is too arrogant for my liking. They’re a bunch of haters and I’d love nothing more than to slap the spit out of their mouths—not literally, of course…well, maybe…yes.”

The screen switches back to Mikaela, who is now surrounded by a large group of Assegai supporters wearing team jerseys, caps, scarves and other paraphernalia.

“A contingent of 12,000 Assegai supporters made the trip to Qazox City for tonight’s game to cheer on the Riskbreakers and they are already warming up for tonight’s game,” she says, backing away as the camera pans over the supporters, who start singing loudly.

“Build a bonfire! Build a bonfire! Put E.S.F. on the top! Put Qazox in the middle and we’ll burn the f***in’ lot!”

“We are the Riskbreakers! We are the Riskbreakers! We’ve come to play hard and win, and if you don’t treat us well, then we’ll just have to call our air force and blow you all to Hell!”

“Through the dearth of darkest night! Through the brightest day and light! We support you, mighty, mighty ASSEGAI! ASSEGAI!”

The camera pans over to Mikaela.

“Reporting live from Qazox City, Qazox, this is Mikaela Eyre signing off. Tune in after the game for a live post-game report!”

Match Up

http://spaam.mrdrake.net/flags/qazox.png Qazox
vs.
http://spaam.mrdrake.net/flags/assegai_developments.png Assegai Developments

Dazza: I'm Dazza "why am I in some strangers bed" Dallas
Ricky: And I'm Ricky Point Stick. This is THE FOOTBALL LIFE on JGN! We are at World Cup 32, match day 16.
Dazza: With me is hard rocker Jake Basher.
Ricky: The fast man of Jeruselem rock'n'roll

Jake: Good to be here everyone and check out the hot babe!
Ricky: You mean Dazza, right?
Jake: Oh yeah, I gotta have Dazza in my next video.
Dazza: Maybe after I have my child (smiles cheekily)

Jake: Hot mama indeed.
Ricky: OK, Jake. You like football?
Jake: Oh yes, Jake's even got his own football team.
Dazza: They any good?

Jake: No, totally useless but what do you expect with much of crazy rockers? We win a game here and there when the opponent is well, worse than us
Ricky: What's the team name?
Jake: The Leadheads, due to our addiction to heavy metal related objects and err women like Dazza here. Oh yeah

Dazza: I'm a midfielder you know.
Ricky: And a champion one as such, except she's pregnant and can't play
Jake: My team will happily accept Dazza, pregnant or not. We need a proper play who actually know the rules
Dazza: I will consider Jake, guest appearances.

Jake: Oh yes, you'll the boys fired up. They've never seen a chick play soccer.
Dazza: We'd better get back to the job before time runs out
Ricky: Jeruselem played the Golden team, well, a team called The Gold TyGrr.
Dazza: Once again the Crusaders raided the camp and stole all the booty - we won FOUR NIL. We still top the group over Bettia. People stop the Kate Bush bashing!

Ricky: We haven't qualified yet but a few more wins, and we'll be there.
Dazza: So will Bettia too - I'm sure.
Ricky: Bettia - Nedalian buddies. They had no trouble with the team from Yafor 2.
Dazza: FIVE ONE and it's clear who the top 2 will be because they are so good.

Jake: I wish my team are near as good as one tenth of Jeruselem or Bettian team
Dazza: Just don't get drugged up or drunk before a game, it helps
Jake: Good tip Dazza! Err yeah
Ricky: So Bettia and Jeruselem smash the opposition so we won't bother explaining those results.

Dazza: Dumania scored a win, over the worse Seckland. TWO NIL to Dumania but well both are eliminated anyway.
Ricky: Playing for pride they are - Seckland are trying win something else, a wooden spoon
Dazza: Cuation had the bye today
Ricky: And they would be happy the Yafor 2 lost their game.

Dazza: Tynelia took the girlies from Dorian and Sonya
Ricky: Such a big game for the Tynelians it is due to the fight between three teams behind Jeruselem and Bettia for third spot
Dazza: The girls lost but they put a fight before handing Tynelia three points which are needed so badly
Ricky: Tynelia winning TWO ONE and well, put Cuation and Yafor 2 on notice.

Dazza: Tynelia are 4 points ahead of Cuation and poor old Yafor 2 are nearly gone in reality
Ricky: Yes, Tynelia should secure 3rd spot unless Cuation make a big move.
Dazza: Yafor 2 need two wins and the top 2 to beat the rest
Ricky: Looks like my tips will qualify, go Tynelia!

Jake: Dorian and Sonya - all girl team! That's nice.
Dazza: Hey, the Jeruselem women's team is hotter. Some of them are here including myself.
Jake: I like this football even more now.
Ricky: I think Dazza's got a new member of her fanclub by the looks of it.

Dazza: Nedalia lost to Sativaville. The Lions went down THREE ONE - a setback
Ricky: Sativaville have hope still and the Lions need to regroup
Dazza: I'm sure they will qualify easily - actually the top 3 in that group is almost decided. Bedistan, Nedalia and Bazalonia
Ricky: Good thing then

Jake: I'm signing up!
Dazza: No need for YAP YAP - we'll just talk to Jake more here.
Jake: I'm going write Jeruselem's world cup theme song for the next cup!
Ricky: Any ideas for it yet

Jake: Not yet, but fans send ideas. When we finish it, we'll tell you.
Ricky: I assume it involves a lot of loud music and you shouting a lot
Jake: Yeah, something like that and people will understand the lyrics for once
Ricky: And a few dancing girls

Jake: For sure!
Dazza: That's it for THE FOOTBALL LIFE
Ricky: Tune back when Jeruselem do qualify and we are Bettia will too
Jake: Can I sing a few tunes to end the show?

Dazza: Yeah sure
Jake: <Dazza's a HOTTIE. I want to her take to my place and ...>
Ricky: This guy is subtle (while Jake is singing)


Group 10:
Seckland [0] Dumania [2]
Dorian and Sonya [1] Tynelia [2]
Jeruselem [4] The Gold TyGrr [0]
Bettia [5] Yafor 2 [1]

Group 5:
Nedalia [1] Sativaville [3]

News items from the McKillops Bridge (http://ns.goobergunch.net/wiki/index.php/McKillops_Bridge) Herald Sun:

http://i55.photobucket.com/albums/g136/regnans/East%20Gippsland/HeraldSunMasthead.png
Errinundera's biggest selling tabloid. We don’t exaggerate much.

WILL THE SNOWY RUN DRY?
http://i55.photobucket.com/albums/g136/regnans/East%20Gippsland/SnowyRivertrickle.jpg
The Man from Snowy River

As the big dry continues Errinundera faces the prospect of water flows in the nation’s greatest river coming to a complete stop. Volumes have fallen to below 40% of normal levels for January. Here, under the great bridge itself, vast areas of the river bed are exposed to the blistering sun.

Spokesperson for the Snowy River Authority, dedindu, warns that the river could be reduced to a trickle. “Flows can be predicted some weeks in advance from rainfall in the catchment areas. Despite some patchy rain up on the plateau there have been record low levels elsewhere in Errinundera. In any case, very little of that rain has fed into Snowy River tributaries such as the Rodger, Deddick and Delegate Rivers. We are still in the grip of a seven-year drought. Whether this is a once-in-a-lifetime event or part of climate change, I can’t say.”

Small business operators are feeling the brunt of the drought. Riverboat operator, caraldu, wants government assistance. “The SRA is predicting that, by April, water levels north of McKillops Bridge will be too low even for our flat-bottomed boats. This will put us out of business. We depend on overseas visitors, especially international football fans, for our livelihood. We are losing business to Trans-National Rail as it is. This is bad for McKillops Bridge. Tourists are winding up in Bonang, of all places. Why would anyone want to go there? Anyway, we need to dredge a channel in the river to accommodate our boats.”

Spokesperson for the Animal Protection Authority, imia, pointed out that dredging the river was not allowed under the Feather-Bellied Yabby Protection Act. “So, yabbies are more important than money?” asked caraldu.


BRAVE FIRE FIGHTERS BATTLE BLAZE

Four fire fighters were severely injured today when a tree fell on them while they prepared a firebreak. They were part of a desperate effort to bring under control a huge fire that has spread into both the Goolengook & Bemm regions. Spokesperson from the Country Fire Authority, oncernoo, advises that the injured were positive despite a broken back, 3 broken legs, several cracked ribs with 2 punctured lungs, 2 fractured skulls, a ruptured spleen and a twisted ankle. “Unfortunately, we’ve lost the tree,” she said.

The CFA has issued fire alerts for the communities of Bellbird Creek, Boothies Blunder, Boulder Creek, Cabbage Tree Creek, Club Terrace, Crabhole, Glen Arte, Manorina, Murrungowar, Old Poddy, Poverty Creek, Puggaree and Round Top.

PALMEISTER’S PUNCHLINES
ORANGE AND BLUE THE ENEMY COLOURS AT LIBERATION STADIUM?

How strange can you get? Liberation Stadium is the home of the Kingfishers – the most successful side in the history of the EFA and the current champions. Earlier today it was awash in a sea of orange and blue. “What’s so unusual about that?” I hear you say. Well, these weren’t Kingfisher fans. They were Rejistanis and therefore the enemy. Not even sharing the colours of their beloved Kingfishers could arouse the sympathies of the home crowd.

Never before have orange and blue fans been so quiet in McKillops Bridge. Their lame excuses for footballers meekly surrendered 3-nil. And that’s also the scoreline for matches between Errinundera and Rejistania. Yep 3-nil in our favour. They’re supposed to be one of the superstar teams of the World Cup, with 6 finals appearances for 4 cups. Pathetic. That’s all I can say.

lyseup (36) scored the first goal after substituting for the angelic, genderqueer captain, rosaniel, who was concussed in a collision with team mate and local star, thiend. The "archangel" plays for cross-river rivals, Milosis, and was booed as she was stretchered from the field. The Rejistanis must have wondered what was going on. Afterwards, a huge roar went up every time thiend touched the ball.

Just before and just after the interval addicksonia (43) and venu (48) scored barely contested goals. A full house of 80-odd thousand fans turned up to watch one of the most eagerly anticipated games in years. Let me tell you, they went home a disappointed bunch.

rosaniel has undergone precautionary X-rays and should be available for the next qualifying match, away to the World #1 side, Squornshelous. I hope they put up a better fight.

With 4 games left in qualifying the potoroos are 9 points ahead of 4th placed team, Demot. We may even overtake Rejistania for 2nd place in our group. A trip to Milchama or Geisenfried seems likely. Bring it on.

http://spaam.mrdrake.net/flags/Errinundera.png
Errinundera 3
(lyseup 36, addicksonia 43, venu 48)

http://spaam.mrdrake.net/flags/Rejistania.png
Rejistania 0

Referee: Igare Nuelu (Yafor 2)

Goal kickers
11 rosaniel
7 addicksonia
7 venu
6 lyseup
2 otelopea
1 cunégonde
1 zenoida

Keep punching.

Sel Appa cannot post so here I am posting for him:

Sel Appa Likely to Qualify After Victory

"Good evening. I'm Barry Moss with SportsNet. The Turtles defeated Okielahoma 3-2 at home and are now pretty much secure to qualify. Only a few things need to fall into place, and the odds say they will. Coach Charles DuPont has agreed to an interview and here he is! Welcome, Coach."

DuPont: "Thank you as always. It is a pleasure to give these interviews."

Barry: "What was your reaction to the match?"

DuPont: "I was absolutely awestruck and ecstatic. It was a back and forth for most of the match and neither of us wanted to give that one goal needed. For the last 35 or so minutes, it was level 2-2. And then Mercator managed to sneak past and deliver that much-needed break in the 87th minute. At that point, Estevez saw that the team needed to build a strong defense and decided that the ball must be kept on the Okielahoma side as much as possible to prevent them from equalizing again. I'm really just so happy with the team. They've done a fabulous job."

Barry: "How close do you think you are to qualifying?"

DuPont: "Well, I expect a 1-1-1 or 2-0-1 match record over the last thre matches. We'll lose to Liverpool England, most likely and defeat Algal States most likely. The only thing to worry about is the Qutar match. As has been stated many times, that match may decide who qualifies. We are 6 points ahead of Qutar, and that should keep them away."

Barry: "What about Algal States, they are only 4 points behind you?"

DuPont: "Yes, but we expect to defeat them and that should be enough. We are much more concerned about Qutar. I do have some worries, however, about not defeating Algal."

Barry: "When do you think we'll know for certain if Sel Appa qualifies?"

DuPont: "When the last group match is completed. Anything can happen and several teams are still in the mix."

Barry: "How would you feel if you qualified?"

DuPont: "I honestly don't know. I think I would faint or start doing flips. The crowd you saw today erupting into a cheer and charging on the field is what I'd expect, but even stronger and more visible. We've worked so hard, just qualifying would be great."

Barry: "And if you don't?"

DuPont: "I know I'd be fine with fourth place in group, but I'm not sure if the team or the fans would appreciate it. We would definitely be set to go somewhere in the Cup of Harmony, however."

Barry: "Any other comments?"

DuPont: "Well, I just would like to continue to wish the team good luck and I think we can do it. I know many people would like to wake up and hear that we've qualified."

Barry: "Well thanks for the interview."

DuPont: "Your most welcome."

Barry: "Well that just about wraps it up. The Turtles are in third place, with three matches left. They are 6 points ahead of rival Qutar, and 4 ahead of group-stunner Algal States. The next match is at Qutar, likely to be the most-watched match of the qualifiers in Sel Appa. After that, we have away at Liverpool England and finally a home match against Algal States to round it off. The final matchday 20 is a bye day for Sel Appa. Good luck to the Turtles. I know I'm with the majority who thinks and hopes the Turtles will qualify. Here is the scoreline for the match with Okielahoma:

http://spaam.mrdrake.net/flags/sel_appa.png 3
http://spaam.mrdrake.net/flags/okielahoma.png 2

And now the current group standings:

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v495/juvanya/wc32b.png

(ooc: I'm calling it quits for this World Cup.. due to RL stuff I'm not really in a good frame of mind to Rp right now.. But by the time WC 33 rolls around i will be. GL to all and Tynelia.. you better get in... lol)

QAZOXIAN TIMES

Qazox is just about done following a 2-0 loss to Wentland, which leaves them 9 points behind with 4 matches left to play. True it's possible that Qazox will recover and sneak into the World Cup, but withbthe Qazoxian economy in complete shreds, the President has all but withdrawn the team from international competitions. With Qazox having placed itself in the running for Hosting Women's World Cup 8 (ooc: signups here: http://forums.jolt.co.uk/showthread.php?t=513024) it is still indeterminate as to the future of Qazoxian international sports.

With the Gnomes coming back home to play at Burlock castle against Tocapa I was expecting a busy day. With the Az-cz offense clicking I was expecting to have plenty of goals to show on my face, and the big jumbotron in the middle was probably going to be showing replays as well. Yes a scoreboard on game day is quite busy.

My first big work of the day was displaying the Bedistan v Snub Nose 39 score during pregame. The Bedistanis struggled to a draw against the lower level side, which sent up a roar of approval from the fans gathered in Mil-Bax. Usually they root for other Atlantian Oceania sides, but dreams of the best overall record for qualifiers were floating around in the minds of the fans, so they went against form in cheering for Snub Nose 39.

Reading off the players for the game was also very strange. When I was displaying the bios it was strange how few actual caps most of these players. The only regulars in the starting lineup were Kn-Dg, Levesque, Haji-Me, Hmr-Pn and Nerazzuri. Uz-Gz was starting in place of Stanleyinho, Ip-Gp in the middle of the field, Lo-Ro in place of Hubertino, Kz-Kz and Du-Tre starting in place of the older defenders and Bu-Lv in goal.

When the game started it seemed as if it might be a slow day. Tocapa was playing an incredible defensive formation trying to slow the game to a mush and hope for a draw or a lucky. The game dragged on for thirty minutes without much action. Then after thirty minutes Ip-Gp started to click in and I got to see some nice plays and put some numbers up.

First in the 36th minute Ip-Gp hooked up with Kn-Dg for a beautiful one timed shot into the upper right corner of the net. Then in the 41st Uz-Gz got on board for the world cup scoring recieving a nice pass from Haji-Me to curl the ball past the Tocapan keeper.

That was all of my work for the first half. When halftime came and I put up various scores from around the world a lot of scores seemed to perplex the fans. Demot's draw at Haraki was the most disappointing, Starblaydia's win at Archregimancy was the most appreciated and Qutars crushing at Algal States was the most confusing.

Then in the second half the Gnomes made some a change to their lineup. Hu-35 was brought on for Kn-Dg. The Pink & Green gave me more chance to show highlights soon enough after the half when Uz-Gz got his second on a rebound from a Hmr-Pn shot to push the Gnomes up to 3-0.

However in the 64th minute Tocapa pulled one back on some slight misplays by both Kz-Kz and Bu-Lv that cost Bu-Lv his clean sheet. The last goal was scored 6 minutes later as Hu-35 entered his name in the Az-cz record books off a quick shot fired up after a long ball from Du-Tre.

When the goal went in At-Zm was called on to the pitch for Levesque and the Gnomes simply went into a kill off the game mode. With five defenders on the pitch the Tocapans couldn't break through and I was allowed to relax for the rest of the match.

(OOC: man... I was really looking forward to a burgeoning rivalry with Qazox. Whatever it is that's troubling you, I wish you the best, man.)

Alone in her hotel room, Mikaela Eyre slides out of her outfit and steps into the shower stall, letting the hot water wash over her.

As she lathers soap all over her body, she wonders if Assegai Developments can finally defeat the Qazoxian team and move a step closer to the dream of a World Cup qualification.

"If only..." she whispers to herself.

Amda-Mo: Well a 4-1 victory over Tocapa. How does that rate?

Lur-Mn: Well considering we weren't starting a lot of our best players you can't complain about a three goal victory.

Amda-Mo: What do you think about the changes that were made to the lineup today?

Lur-Mn: I liked them just fine. Basically it was a youth squad. Something approximating that will be the lineup for next cup. Of course not all of the players who were sitting out will be retired, but it's a good glimpse.

Amda-Mo: Any suprises?

Lur-Mn: Not really. Many expected Bub-Rub to get the start at striker, but other than that, not much.

Amda-Mo: Were you suprised to see the 4-5-1 and not an experiment with formation?

Lur-Mn: Not really. We might see some experimentation but we might not. It's hard to say.

Amda-Mo: When the Bedistan score was posted the crowd was quite pleased. There's a clear desire amongst fans to go for the best overall record, but do you think that feeling is there amongst the coaches?

Lur-Mn: I doubt it. It just isn't that important. Of course we're going to be trying hard to win every match, but we've got chances to experiment we should take this. Of course we'll really know where they stand after the Cataduanes match. If they come out agressive, then we'll know they're going for it.

Amda-Mo: Looking ahead to the Cataduanes match, what do you expect?

Lur-Mn: Well we know they're a strong side, as we saw when they drew us the first time around. But that was in Cataduanes. This time around they're coming to the Goliseum. We'll see how they'll hold up. I think it'll be close but we'll eke it out, say 2-1.

Amda-Mo: That's all for tonight. Signing off after another Gnomes' victory, I'm Amda-Mo.

http://i46.photobucket.com/albums/f141/DarthBunny/ns_stuff/sg-title.png
Giant Penguin: Wanted Dead, or Alive?

The giant penguin (Aptenodytes Ridiculus Sizicus) that has been on a rampage for the last few months on the Isle of Uhm, is still causing a lot of damage to buildings and the infrastructure on the island. However, the government and the island's population don't agree on how the situation should be handled. The government ordered the beast to be captured, if possible, and if that would fail, the penguin was to be killed by the army. This led to many protests all over Uhuh-Topia and Uhuh-Ropa.

A majority of the Isle of Uhmers want to keep the penguin alive, and on the island. "Maybe the animal will just move away again when it gets bored. Or it could be just another tourist attraction," says passer-by Edwin Banks. "Just like the Big Iron Tower, the Unity Stadium, and the Space Centre. Besides, it's quite refreshing to see a different kind of penguin in the streets."

This last comment referred to the opening of a fourth Le Manchot Béton restaurant in the city last week, which uses a (concrete) penguin in its logo, and the logo also appears on the outfits of the national football team because the company is one of the main sponsors. "I think this is just nature's way to tell us that concrete penguins are, like, evil," says Buffy Winters, owner of a small restaurant in the same street and who has lost many customers due to the new restaurant next door.

"Nonsense," comments a spokeswoman of Le Manchot Béton. "Concrete penguins don't wreck buildings. It's the real penguins you should be afraid of. I think the government should just slay the beast. To protect the buildings on this island, and our company's image."

"So just because this amazing creature chose to live here, we should just kill it?" asks Owen Harkness, leader of the Animal Party. "May I remind this woman of Le Manchot that humans only settled here a few centuries ago, and that animals lived here first? It should be us who should move, and that's exactly what I will suggest to the government. Every inhabitant of Uhm should be forced to move back to the Uhuhland mainland, so this island will just belong to the giant penguins and the other animals."

This resulted in such a heated debate that this reporter could barely escape alive. The outcome of that debate is unknown, but so far it seems most people want to keep the penguin alive, but they also want to remain on the island.

In related news, Uhuh-Topian film maker Jack Peterson announced that he intends to make a film about the giant penguin. "Pengzilla, or maybe King Peng, I'm not sure about the title yet," Peterson said at a press conference.

Norman Hacker had been incensed at the distraction caused by the indigenous people's cup. He had banned all Warpstone members of his squad from participating, which denuded the Warplands' team - which some people thought was his intention.

But for a man not known for compromise Hacker played it shrewdly. He gave all Warpstone members the chance to prove themselves for Wentland in the crucial Qazox game and the gamble paid off. Two goals from Frank Treves in the second half meant Wentland were within touching distance of qualification for the world cup finals for only the second time.

It remains to be seen whether the indigenous nations competition will distract Wentland any further from the finals - but given the events in Qazox that met the visitors when they returned home this is of less importance in the global scheme of things.

The following report is in a horribly bastardized Turorian from out on that little island off the main island no one really usually gives half an ass about...

Dem Fwight of Dem Fwightwess Berwd

Es ben two wong for dem fwightwess berwds. Dems Turori end dems de cocoabos. Dems didit well in dem World Cup 31 tem bein in dem Vilita end dem Lowland Clans init dem Atlantian Oceania.

Init dem Turori Eels init dem World Cup Finals! Wilit be dem hope in Geisenfried end Milchama?

Init not. Dem Vilita Jungle Cats doit in dem Turori Eels 3-1 init MD01 football gaim friendly. Init lozt not Turori Eels, init World Cup Qualifying onlie MD02. Init return the football gaim init dem HURD. Alsoe init Turori Group 2, dem rival natein de World Cup 31 Commerce Heights end Krytenia! Dem Turori Eels init not well, end dem rival World Cup 32 not and. Elves Security Forces! Init not well moar de Turori Eels, teims three de football gud! Init and, Turori init not well. Init qualification toit de small. Init moar difhiculd? Init tou. Ropa-Topia! Dem Ropa-Topia de World Cup 31 teim vahre gud, dem not grait. Init still, dem Turori Eels init not well. Init moar difhiculd? Init tou. Alasdair I Frosticus! Dem Turori Eels not faise Alasdair I Frosticus init World Cup 31, dem still gud. Dem alsoe Group 2 Bostopia! Init dem Nomadasia. Init Group 2 OV DEAD!

Init Dem MD02, tu reil gaim one. Init opoze dem HURD, toit de difhiculd not. Turori Eels gole fore, dem HURD gole cero! Dem Turori Eels World Cup 32 ov one vicgry ov cero deveet. Dem Turori eggsite ov gaim one. Ov gaim 2, init MD03, dem Turori Eels faise dem Alasdair I Frosticus. Init gaim 2, not dem gole. Alasdair I Frosticus gole cero, Turori Eels gole cero. Dem Turori Eels ov one vicgry, cero deveet end one tye. Init resuld dem tabel ov Group 2, Turori Eels pointe fore, plaise one!

Init gaim three moar tye. Elves Security Forces gole 2, Turori Eels gole 2. Init gaim four ov MD05, Turori Eels vicgry ov dem Nomadasia, alsoe Turori Eels gole fore, dem Nomadasia gole cero. Et dem gaim five en MD06, Turori Eels deveet. Init dem Krytenia natein en Group 2 subar. Krytenia gole fore, Turori gole one. Init dem Turori Eels deveet moar, dem Commerce Heights gole fore, Turori gole cero. Dem MD08, Turori Eels gaim not. Turori Eels benvid not not gaim, Init deveet three runne dem Bostopia gole one, Turori Eels gole cero. Init deveet fore runne dem Ropa-Topia gole one, Turori Eels gole cero.

Init dem HURD ov MD12, Turori Eels vicgry alas. Ov deveet fore runne not, Turori Eeels gole three, dem HURD gole cero. Turori not Group 2 sdand, 9 gaim resuld. Turori deveet redeer Alasdair I Frosticus gole 2, Turori Eels gole one. Alas i vicgry subar ov Turori Eels. Dem MD14 gaim Turori Eels init dem Elves Security Forces. Dem Elves Security Forces init dem crap, dem gole one. Turori Eels, subar init runne, gole 2. Turori Eels Vicgry!!!

Turori Eels vicgry gaim 11 runnit fore, ov 5 deveet end 2 tye. World Cup 32 Qualifying not Turori gud, 19-14 Turori ov World Cup Finals. Init gaim 12 Turori Eels vicgry runne 2, dem Nomadasia gole cero ov dem Turori gole 2. Dem Elves Security Forces crap moar, deveet ov one gole. Dem Turori eggsite World Cup 32 Qualifying gud? Dem Krytenia not. Dem Turori Eels deveet todal crap ov dem Krytenia. Krytenia gole 5!!!!!! Turori dem crap ov gole cero.

Init dem World Cup 32 Qualifying Group 2, Turori Eels ov 5 vicgry, 6 deveet, 2 tye. Turori Eels end Ropa-Topia dem saim resuld, dem Alasdair I Frosticus 2 moar vicgry in tabel.

Dem Turori Eels not gud resuld ov dem World Cup 32 Qualifying, ov dem vicgry gaim's three vicgry's three init dem World Cup Finals small, dem Cup of Harmony dem moar.

The Crimson Blade

Giant Penguins & Qazox

With another game postponed due to who-knows-what, the member of the Assegai Developments National Team decided to take a break in between all the practice leading up to the big game with Qazox.

After reading an article about a giant penguin in the Ropa-Topian Sports Alliance Sports Gazette, several players suggested a trip to the Isle of Uhm in Ropa-Topia to see the penguin in person.

So, the team packed their bags and cameras and headed to Ropa-Topia.

It wasn’t hard to find the penguin, and the players were awed at the immensity of the tuxedoed, elegant bird, which would look in their direction and occasionally squawk at them.

One of the players, Assegai defender Barnard Mallowbourne, went a step further, photographing the penguin and using the image in a makeshift poster for a potential “Pengzilla” movie.

http://i15.photobucket.com/albums/a371/DUBKansas/Pengzilla.jpg

As you can see in Mallowbourne’s doctored image, the giant penguin wasn’t all too thrilled about being photographed. After squawking loudly a couple of times, the penguin thrashed a nearby cottage and waddled off into the water.

Grabbing several giant penguin souvenirs, the Assegai players headed back to Qazox the next morning.

-----

Back in Qazox City, the Assegai players continued their preparation for their match with Qazox and seemed very motivated. A giant “Pengzilla” poster hung on a wall in the team dressing room, which had plush penguins in every locker stall.

Article by Mikaela Eyre


Match-Up

http://spaam.mrdrake.net/flags/qazox.png Qazox
vs.
http://spaam.mrdrake.net/flags/assegai_developments.png Assegai Developments

RP Cutoff MD 17.

Here it goes again....

The Crimson Blade

Assegai Looses to Qazox Again; Riskbreakers Practically Eliminated

QAZOX CITY, Qazox — Barring a miracle of monumental proportions, the Assegai Developments National Football Team was practically eliminated in a gut-wrenching 1-3 loss to hated rival Qazox.

The game even ended with several Assegai players getting into a minor scuffle with Qazox players, whom Assegai players accused of insulting them.

Although the Riskbreakers aren’t mathematically eliminated, their next three games are against very difficult opponents. And, even if Assegai manages to defeat Wentland back home in Leá Monde, the threat of footballing powers Ariddia and Schiavonia makes Assegai’s passage to the Proper nearly impossible.

Three goals by Qazox’s Kyle Horton (in the 33rd, 45th and 70th minutes) propelled the Black Oxen past Severus Snape’s lone goal in the 12th minute of play.

Heads hung low, the Assegai players boarded their team bus and headed for the airport for the long flight back to Assegai.

Game Summary

http://spaam.mrdrake.net/flags/qazox.pngQazox 3
http://spaam.mrdrake.net/flags/assegai_developments.pngAssegai Developments 1

[QZX]
Kyle Horton (33’, 45’, 70’)

[AD]
Severus Snape (12’)

Article by Mikaela Eyre

Protests Break Out In Nemnenait Square

After an upsetting defeat at Qutar, many fans took to the streets protesting and rioting. The 2-0 defeat upsetted many, including the Football Federation of Sel Appa's president, who called the referee "a disgrace to a noble profession". Many say that referee Pierre Martin of Nebuleux was biased and favored the Qutari team. Some went as far as to accuse Qutar of bribing the referee. Martin dealt so many cards to Sel Appa, newspaper headlines read: "REFEREE PLAYS DEALER" and "REF'S HAND LOVES POCKET".

Nearly a dozen cards were dealt to the Turtles. Many star players are now forced to sit on the bench during the remaining to matches. Estevez, Alex Nart, and Arthur Mercator all received straight red cards for what seemed to be unfair calls, and at worse should have been yellow. Lee Rehsom and Jimmy Peech were given two yellow cards, which resulted in their expulsion from the game. Jacques Tortue, Bernard Apple, and Fuji Kawagaji also received one yellow card each. Goalkeeper Vasily Kashchenko barely escaped his own red card when the referee pulled it out, but another official intervened.

The FFSA has said it will appeal all the cards and ask for the dismissal of the referee. Many notable players will be missing the remaining two qualifier matches, which leave mostly unsung players, such as Fo Chang and Michael Gold, neither of whom have seen an international match, but have been kept on the team. The Turtles former 3-3-4 format has been forced into a 3-4-3 format, but Acting Captain Colin Patette said they would still play a 3-3-4 style. The new roster has been made public:

01-Vasily KASHCHENKO (GK)
05-Kash Vasou (DF)
06-Bernard APPLE (DF)
08-Fo CHANG (DF)*
09-Pho NGUYEN (MF)*
10-Jacques TORTUE (MF)
11-Colin PATETTE (MF) Acting Captain
13-Michael GOLD (MF)*
16-Alan DUBROV (FW)
17-George BEDDING (FW)
18-Fuji KAWAGAJI (FW)

The starred players have never seen a match. We see many newcomers that may bring to the team what it ill need. Coach Charles DuPont said he was furious and would not agree to an interview, saying he might upset people. Captain and star player Estevez who received the first direct red card said "I really wanted to deck the bastard, but I couldn't jeopardize the match." Back in Nemnenait Square, rioters through rocks and set the Qutari Information Booth, which was set up among the other booths of fellow groupmates. Many demonstrators carried signs saying "RIGGED!" "BRIBED!" "CORRUPT!"

In other news, before the match, a man was arrested after it was found he planned to bomb the Qutar team bus. The man was caught with a ticket to Qutar and several kilos of unspecified explosives. Charges are still pending. Chancellor Jonas Pavlov urged calm and restraint and said: "It ain't over yet." Indeed, the Turtles still have a match against Liverpool England and finally Algal States, which may both turn out better than previously expected, due to the player shuffle. The Turtles remain in third place, with a 3-point lead of Qutar. Another loss would likely knock the Turtles out of the mix. Here is the scoreline:

http://spaam.mrdrake.net/flags/the_islands_of_qutar.png 2
http://spaam.mrdrake.net/flags/sel_appa.png 0

And now the current group standings:

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v495/juvanya/wc32c.png

Dear Diary,

What a match! We beat the world champions on their home ground. And what a way to win – rosaniel scored a hat trick. She is a supestar! That’s only the fourth time a potoroo has managed it. The others were firset (Akbarland WC6), antarcticad (DePaul WC7) and ubhashinim (Benlandngdo WC30). I don’t know about firset but the rest of that company is pretty good.

What was Squornshelous like? Another hellhole. You get heartily sick of them after a while. Their Utopia rating, according to the University for the Global Environment, is 18 out of 100. That’s the worst I’ve ever seen. Our team gopher, boromiroo described it best when he said, “There is an evil there that does not sleep. ‘Tis a barren wasteland, riddled with fire, ash and dust. The very air you breathe is a poisonous fume.”

Huge armies were marching all over the countryside, great fleets filled the harbours and the air was constantly rent with the sound of fighter-bombers. Their red and black colours were everywhere, establishing a mood of violence and oppression. This is one nasty country. Even the UN rated them as the 608th rudest out of over 90,000 NationStates. Their income tax rate is 94% (ours is 4%), 45% of government revenue is spent on the military and a further 20% on the police. I wonder how much goes to the secret police. 61 Squornshelan Credits out of every 100 are spent on the military or police. That is: spent by anybody. What a waste of money.

rosaniel was, understandably, pumped up after the game. She addressed the team when it returned to the rooms and said that her hat trick was due to the entire team effort. “We have shown the world that we have what it takes to win a World Cup. We have travelled to one of the most intimidating places on earth, where the inhabitants have hate in their eyes, where the football team is the world champion and rated #1, and we beat them!”

She drew particular attention to thiend who was given the task of tagging Igor Khabarov, who scored a hat trick against us in the earlier match, and completely shut him out of the game. This accolade was a magnanimous gesture given that thiend had knocked rosaniel out last match.

http://i55.photobucket.com/albums/g136/regnans/East%20Gippsland/thiend.jpg

thiend (picture pasted above) is the vice-captain of the McKillops Bridge Kingfishers, the current EFA champions. With her captain there, evolu – who is the potoroos’ #1 keeper, they head the tightest defence in the Premier League. thiend has quirky feet: they appear misshapen when bare but in strap up sandals, ooh la la! She’s an accountant in her day job but we try not to hold that against her. I once heard her tell someone on a mobile, “You just tell me the numbers you want at the bottom and I’ll put in the numbers above them.” I think she was joking.

The goals were scored as follows:
Squornshelous (Jaromil Ctibor 4)
Errinundera (rosaniel 27)
Errinundera (rosaniel 35)
Squornshelous (Arman Latvala 52 – the mysterious striker #3 from the previous encounter)
Errinundera (rosaniel 59)

Cup goalkickers so far:
14 rosaniel
7 addicksonia
7 venu
6 lyseup
2 otelopea
1 cunégonde
1 zenoida

Our World Cup prospects are looking good. The potoroos are in 3rd place on equal points with the 2nd placed team, Rejistania, who have yet to play the top side. We also have a game in hand over Rejistania. We are 9 points ahead of the 4th placed team, Demot, who have also to play Squornshelous. Our last 3 matches are against the 5th placed Commerce Heights JSY and the 2 whipping boys, Paleoslavia and Voskadouria. If Errinundera plays to form we could finish 2nd in our group. In any case we only need 1 point from the last 3 games to be assured of a trip to Milchama or Geisenfried.

Go potoroos!

Yours sincerely,

mckennap
Father to be and boot stud for the national team

We 'ain't dead yet! Are we?

The Turori Eels went into their 14th match of the 16 game World Cup 32 Qualifying campaign knowing that a loss could take them out of the running for World Cup Qualification. Thankfully for the Eels, they did not lose, with a hard fought 2-2 draw with Commerce Heights. Unthankfully, qualification rivals Ropa-Topia and Elves Security Forces won. This leaves Turori on 18 points, 4 back of Alasdair I Frosticus with just 2 games to play, and Ropa-Topia (20) and Elves Security Forces (19) to overcome if they are going to succeed.

Do The Eels Stand a Chance?

Well, the Eels have to play Ropa-Topia on the final matchday. A must-win game, the Eels can certainly leap-frog Ropa-Topia by beating them on home turf, even if the Ropa-Topians win their other match, of course assuming Turori can win theirs. Of course, this is no guarantee, with the Eels dropping a result in the first half of qualifying to Bostopia, one of those results that Turori faithful will look back to regret should their Eels fall short. Assuming they get revenge the second time around, however, Turori will sit on 24 points at the end of their Qualifying session, with two teams, Alasdair I Frosticus and Elves Security Forces to hope results go against for.

So, lets start with the lower ranked side. Elves Security Forces are just one point ahead of the Eels, and have just 2 games to play. One of these games happens to be against Ropa-Topia. As odd as it sounds, even though Ropa-Topia is farther up on points than Elves Security Forces, the Eels actually want Ropa-Topia to win this one. Being just 2 points behind Ropa-Topia, Turori can make up all the ground on the Topians when the two teams meet head to head on the final matchday. They can not, however, count on the Elves dropping any points to whipping boys Nomadasia. Therefore, the ideal result between Elves Security Forces and Ropa-Topia would be any result which does not involve a victory for the Elves. A Ropa-Topia victory, or draw, would be ideal for Turori's qualification chances.

With a Ropa-Topia result certainly not out of the question, It is possible that only one team stands in Turori's way of qualification to World Cup 32. Alasdair I Frosticus. Unfortunately, Alasdair I Frosticus only need 3 points to completely knock Turori out of qualification. Even more unfortunately, they have three games to do so, needing just one victory in three matches, or a series of draws. All is not entirely lost, however. Alasdair I Frosticus first has to face Bostopia in Bostopia. While, on paper, an Alasdair I Frosticus victory might be expected, Bostopia have proven to be no slouch in qualification and still hang on with a slim, but existant chance at qualification. A win over Alasdair I Frosticus at home would keep both themselves, and the Eels in the hunt. Unfortunately for the Eels, Alasdair I Frosticus then gets to return home and face the HURD. The HURD have been less than impressive especially away from home, so Turori faithful will have to be extra deserving if they are going to expect some help. Ideally, Turori fans will want a draw from these two matches, and hope that Commerce Heights can put a similar beating on the AiF as they did in the first leg, allowing the Turori Eels to sneak through on goal differential over the current third placed team.

Dear Diary

Elune be praised!!! My mom and Dad and the rest of the gang are still in the thick of things in the qualification. It is not the perfect situation to be sure, but the cards seem to be lining up right for them to back their way into the Proper despite a horrendous previous few games. However, despite the fortunate luck of the Marauders, they are not why I am writing this entry today. I just came back from the offices of Asanta Webber, and she offered me a spot on the Rinaldi Gunners. Well, it was a difficult decision to make. My dad's good friend Dwier Titenburg had personally guranteed me a spot on the Twilight in the next season, and both my parents gave me their blessing for a spot on that club, or the Rockers. But the Gunners were offering me a great salary, good conditions, and I just don't want to walk in the shadow of my parents. So I took the deal happily, and even though I have become the youngest player ever in EPL history, at the tender age of 14, Asanta has told me that I'll likely get starting time. With such a wonderous occurance, could my parents not be happy for me? Well they are, but they are also quite ticked about it. They have a certain distaste for the Rinaldi side, despite the city only being just twenty miles from our home. My dad is even more outraged that I didn't take the number 8 they offered me, but instead took the number 9. I tried explaining to them about how I was trying to do something on my own, that would distiguish me as an individual and not just the son of two national icons, but they wouldn't hear of it, hence the early arrival of this entry. Yet I am not deterred from my path, nor am I discouraged or disheartened about my parents disgust for my decision. I know I am young yet, espicially for an elf, but I must choose my path, not let others decide it for me. So tommorow it will begin, I will lace up my boots, and begin to pursue the next leg in my life's journey, and whatever lies beyond. I only hope that my parents will come around sooner rather than later, for I would dearly like their support in these trying weeks and months ahead.

Kiso Night

<Kate Bush knocks on Dazza's hotel room door, Dazza opens the door.>

Dazza: Hey Kate, what's the matter? Come in!

<Kate looks at Dazza who's wearing a badly secured bathrobe>

Kate: I should let you get dressed Dazza.
Dazza: Nah, you're lucky I'm wearing anything. Don't worry.

<Kate goes and Dazza closes the door>

Kate: I need some advice, err, about starting a family
Dazza: Why ask Bunny Wabbit Dazza?
Kate: Because you're the expert Mum in the team
Dazza: My family is about having kids, every Dallas girl is Mum!

Kate: Well, you know I'm over 30 and it's getting late for me, should I start as soon as retire?
Dazza: As long as you have financial support, raising kids in poverty is no fun as my Mum found out
Kate: I've got the savings for it, but I want to be stay at home Mum for a while
Dazza: That's the best way, but get yourself a career afterwards. You'll need the money for all those kiddie expenses when they grow up

Kate: My husband doesn't have the best paying job the world either, so you might be right.
Dazza: So, any other skills other than football?
Kate: I was a secretary but I don't want to go back that kind of job
Dazza: I got it, become a fitness trainer for movie stars!

Kate: Me?
Dazza: Yeah, since you won't whore yourself on TV like I do - it's the next best thing.
Kate: Hey, a business of my own - on my terms and working hours. Good idea.
Dazza: So, you can take a break when you have more kids again.

Kate: Well, I go start my family after this world cup.
Dazza: Your man keen?
Kate: He's been kinda hinting anyway, I need a lot more encouragement unlike you
Dazza: Just make sure you can support the kid or kids

Kate: Not all of us like millionaires like you Dazza with your commercial financial sources and other income
Dazza: Dazza maybe small but she's no financial dill
Kate: You sure make lots of money, even if you're not playing football
Dazza: Everyone just thinks I'm the master salesperson. Gotta use it when it lasts

Kate: Well, I had to work to get here and now I've got work to get money for the family I want
Dazza: Hey, don't worry!
Kate: I could for your sister for a while
Dazza: I'll give a good reference. Debbie's a family friendly employer. We understand Mums need support in the workplace.

Kate: Yeah thanks Dazza
Dazza: Hey, speaking of families - want to see my bubs when he or she or whatever comes out
Kate: Sure thing Dazza
Dazza: Doctor say it's going to be small thing, like I was.

Kate: One more thing, err, I need tips to get my man really interested in you-know-what
Dazza: You're asking the right person indeed
Kate: I'm kinda jealous how you charm your way around things, even if you do immoral things
Dazza: It's an art which only few can master

Kate: That might mean I might have to change my wardrobe too
Dazza: It is that boring
Kate: Err, yes - it's a conservative's dream compared to yours.
Dazza: We'll go shopping together, and you can get them slinky dresses Dazza parades around on TV

Kate: No cat suites though
Dazza: Cat suites really work well with men!
Kate: You're small, cute and slinky - I'm tall, lanky and muscular. It suits you more.
Dazza: We can find a way to make it work

Kate: Oh yes, I need a new car too ... the old bomb is not something I trust driving kids around in
Dazza: I'll make sure Bob Fina will give a good deal, he's a friend.
Kate: Oh, the car yard selling Feraris with that ad you slink around in
Dazza: That's the one

http://i46.photobucket.com/albums/f141/DarthBunny/ns_stuff/sg-title.png
Suburb In Flames As Penguin Flees Celebrations

http://i46.photobucket.com/albums/f141/DarthBunny/penguin-attack.jpg
Several houses on fire in Zonnedael

Ropa-Topia's recent 3-2 victory over Alasdair I Frosticus caused many Ropa-Topians to go out in the streets to celebrate, because it means the team still has a chance to qualify for the World Cup. The celebrations ended in chaos when the cheering crowds scared the giant penguin, and the penguin ran toward a nearby lake through Zonnedael, a suburb of Uhm.

Many houses were destroyed by the penguin, and even more damaged; not only because the penguin didn't really try to avoid stepping on buildings as it ran, but also because ruptured gas pipes resulted in the biggest blaze on the Isle of Uhm in centuries. Thanks to the celebrations everyone was already out in the streets and no people were killed, but the damage is estimated around 15 million Topian Guilders or 79 million Uhuh-Ro.

<symbol of the “Tynelian Nightly Sporting News with Jeff Jefferson” looms in the background>

Jeff Jefferson: Well as we turn to the World Cup it looks like everyone was fit to be tied today Dinah.

Dinah Miller: Yes I can’t remember the last time all four matches ended up in draws like today.

Tom Thompson: Well that’s good for us though, no one gained any ground and we’re one match closer to the end.

Dinah: Well yes and no. We still have a tough time ahead of us now because of the draw but at least we still have a little cushion to try and hold onto.

Tom: But Cuation didn’t gain on us cause we tied them.

Jeff: And that’s twice now we couldn’t score on them, their defense knows how to shut us down.

Dinah: That’s right Jeff, the good thing is at least this time they couldn’t score either. Tom Gordman came up big that’s for sure.

Tom: So why is it bad then?

Dinah: Its not bad Tom, just could be better. Look at what we each have left. We have Jerusalem then a bye then Seckland. I expect Seckland to be a win that’s only three more points. If Cuation wins out then they will beat us by two points and we’ll be heading to the CoH again.

Jeff: But if we can take some points off Jerusalem…

Dinah: Anything short of a win doesn’t really help. A draw would still mean we come up a point short. And for once we have the goal differential advantage too.

Tom: So you’re saying we have to beat Jerusalem then.

Dinah: Pretty much. We win out and nothing Cuation does will catch us. On the other hand even if we lose against Jerusalem expecting a win against Seckland that will force Cuation to win out since if they take one draw that gives them seven points maximum whioch would tie us and our GD would advance us. This is actually starting to look like last Cup, where had we been able to beat Az-cz once in the two matches ended up being the difference between us making it instead of being in the CoH again.

Tom: So who do they have left?

Jeff: According to my schedule they have to go on the road against The Gold Tygrr.

Dinah: A probable win.

Jeff: Home against Yafor2.

Dinah: A tricky one, Yafor 2 has been fading in the second half despite the draw today, I don’t see anything worse than a draw here for Cuation since they’re at home. Probably a win though.

Jeff: And they finish off at home against Dorian and Sonya.

Dinah: D&S has had another bad cup, I don’t see them stopping Cuation.

Tom: So… we’re screwed then?

Dinah: Unless there’s a big upset things don’t look too good.

Jeff: Hey we can still beat Jerusalem ya know. We got a draw on their field and now they come home to where we knocked off Bettia.

Dinah: Yes but they’re coming off a disappointing draw themselves so they could be fired up for this match, especially since we did tie them the first time out.

Tom: So, we can do it then?

Dinah: Well it will be a very exciting match I think whatever happens. Looking at the numbers it’s the best two defenses in the group against two of the top three offenses.

Jeff: Yes but notice they’re ahead of us in each of those areas.

Dinah: Which is why I say this will be an extremely tough match to get a win off of. Unlike Bettia, Jerusalem actually plays defense so we can’t expect the breakdowns that worked in our favor against Bettia.

Tom: But they clinched.

Jeff: Good point Tom, with today’s draw Jerusalem stays 10 points ahead of fourth place Cuation with three matches left so they’re in. Maybe they’ll sit some of their regulars for this match and we can steal a win.

Dinah: That’s possible, but I think they want a win to show the first match with us was a fluke.

Jeff: Well we’ll find out soon enough I guess. That’s all the time we have for today. Until next show good night everyone.

CAFUNDÉU PLAYED A FRIENDLY AND IS QUALIFIED

http://img.terra.com.br/i/2005/11/17/278966-2742-ga.jpg
Many supporters came to see the game

Cafundéu didn’t play for the World Cup qualifiers today. Instead of it the “B” team of the country played a friendly against regional friends La Provincia Di Roma, in the old city of São José. Cafundéu’s team was very good, but the defense played badly. Good for the supporters, who could see eight goals in a game. Braddock saw the game and probably have listed some players to add to the main team. The opponent has some great players, but is an unexperienced team which played no international competitions.

Many supporters ignored this friendly to see another game of the World Cup qualifiers, which was shown in a famous television channel of Cafundéu. It was Spaam against The Lowland Clans. If Spaam didn’t win, Cafundéu would be qualified. And this happened. Supporters of Cafundéu commemorated the place in the World Cup and the police had some work to contain them, but they controlled the situation. Now the team will play against Salwinia away.

THE GAME
Cafundéu’s players were anxious to play a match for the national team, so they start attacking since the start. Roma’s players were cautious, but had an offensive attitude too. Soon the game became very exciting, with good goal chances. 2nd minute: Roosevelt received the ball in the left side of the field and reached the attack with speed. He dribbled Allerinno and crossed the ball to the area, where Kemp headed it, but sent it over the bar, missing the goal.

5th minute: Roma replied with Di Vazzo, who was with the ball in the midfield and made a good play passing it to Lamarco in the attack. Lamarco found some space to shoot and shot. The ball hit Brunnés and Matogrosso saved it avoiding the goal. 9th minute: Paulo was with the ball in the defense and passed it to Resitiv, who ran to the attack, passing the ball later to Kimball. The strong midfielder tried to score shooting the ball from outside the area, but he sent the ball over the bar.

13th minute: Roosevelt tackled Prietto and passed the ball to Metir, who started a wonderful play dribbling two opponents and reaching the attack. He passed the ball to Kemp, who shot to the goal, but the goalkeeper Terraza made a good save, giving no rebound. 15th minute: The visitors had a good chance when Congiorno sent the ball to Lamarco, who made a good play and passed the ball to Franceschini with conditions to score, but he didn’t shoot and Covas was able to get the ball back.

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Coqueiral scored two goals in the game

18th minute: Cafundéu’s defense made a huge mistake when Coelho missed the ball to Di Vazzo. The midfielder passed to Massaro, who was entering inside the area. Massaro received the ball and shot. Matogrosso jumped badly and didn’t reach the ball, so Roma scored a goal. 21st minute: After suffering the goal, the coach Serginho Mallandro sent the team to attack. Resitiv was with the ball, dribbled Sesti and passed to Coqueiral, who shot the ball, but sent it wide.

23rd minute: Paulo came well from the midfield and reached the attack, passing the ball to Kimball. The midfielder shot, but was blocked by Congiorno. Roosevelt got the rebound and shot with strength to the goal, scoring a goal for Cafundéu. 27th minute: Roma attacked with Massaro, who made a good play in the right side of the field and passed the ball to Pizzi, who dribbled Covas and shot to the goal. Matogrosso made another bad jump, but this time the ball hit the post and went wide.

30th minute: Cafundéu replied using the speed of Roosevelt, who dribbled an opponent and passed the ball to Metir. The tupi midfielder controlled the ball and passed it to Kemp, who was well marked and couldn’t shot, losing the ball to Prietto. 33rd minute: Sesti passed the ball back to Terraza, who was going to send the ball to the attack, but he missed the ball. The ball was going to enter in the goal, but Terraza could reach the ball before suffering a humiliating goal, sending the ball to the attack.

35th minute: Roma attacked using the wings. Di Vazzo passed the ball to Pizzi, who invaded the area, dribbled the goalkeeper and shot to the goal. In an incredible move, Paulo hit the ball and saved Cafundéu from suffering another goal. 39th minute: Kimball was with the ball in the attacking side, but didn’t find a team mate to pass. He sent the ball to the area, Prietto headed it to outside the area. Metir took the rebound and shot. The ball hit a defender and was in the air when Coqueiral hit it with a volley, scoring the goal.

After this magnificent goal, Roma attacked again, this time with more strength. 43rd minute: Massaro made a long range pass to the area. Lamarco, Franceschini, Coelho and Covas missed the ball, but Pizzi could head it with accuracy, scoring his first goal in the game. 45th minute: Cafundéu replied fast. Resitiv invaded the area dribbling two opponents and shooting the ball. Terraza made a poor save, giving the rebound to Metir who had no problems to score the goal. The first half ended 3x2 to Cafundéu.

http://img.terra.com.br/i/2005/10/06/268023-6357-ga.jpg
Pizzi commemorates one of his goals

Many changes were seen in both teams in halftime. Mallandro made three changes, putting Grey in Coelho’s place, Foguett in Covas’ place and Horsch in Kemp’s place. Ravioli changed Allerinno, Prietto and Franceschini for De Marcola, Zague and Seresta. The second half started like the first, with fast attacks and very exciting. 1st minute: Paulo reached the attack and passed the ball to Horsch, who shot from outside the area. He missed the goal.

5th minute: Metir dribbled two opponents and sent the ball to the area. Coqueiral headed it, but Terraza made a fine save and sent the ball for a corner. Roosevelt took it, but was too strong and nobody could get the ball. 7th minute: Roma started a fast counterattack. Seresta received the ball in the left side of the area and passed it to Pizzi, who was in the smallest area. Brunnés tried to tackle him, but was dribbled by Pizzi who shot, giving no chances to Matogrosso and scoring his second goal in the game.

10th minute: Paulo was with the ball, being marked by Pizzi. They started to discuss and one pushed the other. The referee had to show the yellow card to both. 12th minute: Resitiv passed the ball to Kimball, who tried to score shooting from outside the area. The ball went wide. 15th minute: Foguett fouled Massaro and received a yellow card. Massaro took the free kick, obligating Matogrosso to make a good save. After this play, Mallandro changed Paulo and Kimball, putting Kantamir and Praiano in their places.

18th minute: Kantamir made a good play from the right side, dribbling a player and passing the ball to Metir, who invaded the area and shot. Terraza saved, but gave the rebound to Horsch, who shot and sent the ball over the bar, missing a good chance to score. 22nd minute: De Marcola invaded the area and was fouled by Roosevelt. Penalty for La Provincia Di Roma. Pizzi shot and scored the goal. After a calm first half, the second half was very violent, with five cards in twenty minutes and lots of confusions.

24th minute: Praiano received the ball from Metir and invaded the area. Congiorno tackled him, but Praiano fell inside the area and the referee marked another penalty, giving another yellow card. A famous commentator said: “This referee must be having pains in his arm after giving so many cards in such a short period of time”. Roosevelt took the penalty, shooting the ball with strength. It hit the post. Mallandro became furious and put Falcus in his place.

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Roma made a very good game

27th minute: Cafundéu was still attacking in numbers. Kantamir passed the ball to Metir, who controlled it before seeing Falcus in a good position and passing the ball to him. Falcus passed the ball with his ankle to Coqueiral, who invaded the area, dribbled the goalkeeper and scored the eight goal of the game. After suffering another goal, Ravioli put Regazzo and Romano in the places of Congiorno and Lamarco. 30th minute: Massaro shot from outside the area trying to score, but the ball went over the bar.

34th minute: Falcus ran since the midfield, reaching the area, but was tackled by Regazzo. Resitiv got the rebound shooting to the goal, but missing it. The ball went to the supporters, who battle to get this souvenir. 38th minute: Coqueiral was holding the ball in the midfield when Pizzi fouled him. This was a very violent foul, and the referee had no doubt in showing Pizzi the red card. After scoring three goals, Pizzi had to left the game after fouling an opponent.

40th minute: Metir received the ball from Grey, dribbled an opponent and passed the ball to Kantamir. The midfielder had problems to invade the area and missed the ball. 43rd minute: In the last chance of the game, Roma started a counterattack with Zague, who dribbled an opponent and passed the ball to De Marcola, who shot from outside the area. This time Matogrosso was able to save. The game ended 4x4, but the supporters became extremely happy when they discovered that the game between Spaam and The Lowland Clans ended 1x1.

“We’re qualified to the World Cup!” – said a supporter. The supporters started to party and it lasted all the day. The players also talked with the media after the game. Metir was the first to talk: “It’s good to make a good game, and I’m sure that my performance can give me a chance in the main team soon, although I play in the indigenous squad of Cafundéu too.” Roosevelt also talked too: “I made a good game and scored a goal. Too bad that I missed the penalty, but that’s football. But I think that it was unfair to substitute me just because of that.”

Matogrosso was a bit sad because of his poor performance: “My game wasn’t very good. I suffered four goals and this was my chance to shine. It was very bad for me.” But Kemp was happy: “Playing well or not, it’s a honor to play for Cafundéu.” The coach Serginho Mallandro talked with the press too: “ I’m not a professional coach, I’m just an entertainer, but I think that I did my job well.”

The real coach Franz Braddock gave an interview by telephone, saying: “We’re now in the World Cup, I’m proud of my players and I think that we can make a good performance in this championship. But now we need to play the last three games, and we’ll try to win.”

http://img.terra.com.br/i/2005/07/14/247254-2452-ga.jpg
Kimball commemorates one of Cafundéu's goals

CAFUNDÉU 4x4 LA PROVINCIA DI ROMA

Place: Estádio Pioneiro, in São José.
Attendance: 78,560 people.
Referee: Luís Fernando Aragão(Cafundéu).
Man of the Match: Georgious Metir(Cafundéu).

http://spaam.mrdrake.net/flags/cafundeu.png CAFUNDÉU: Matogrosso, Coelho(Grey), Covas(Foguett) and Brunnés; Paulo(Kantamir), Roosevelt(Falcus), Resitiv, Metir and Kimball(Praiano); Coqueiral and Kemp(Horsch).
Coach: Serginho Mallandro.

http://spaam.mrdrake.net/flags/la_provincia_di_roma.png LA PROVINCIA DI ROMA: Terraza, Congiorno(Regazzo), Sesti, Fiorini and Allerinno(De Marcola); Di Vazzo, Prietto(Zague) and Massaro; Lamarco(Romano), Pizzi and Franceschini(Seresta).
Coach: Matteo Ravioli.

Ratings:
9- Metir, Coqueiral and Pizzi.
8- Roosevelt, Falcus, Resitiv, Massaro, Di Vazzo and De Marcola.
7- Horsch, Kimball, Praiano, Kantamir, Lamarco, Seresta, Romano and Kemp.
6- Paulo, Grey, Franceschini, Prieto and Zague.
5- Foguett, Brunnés, Terraza, Regazzo and Congiorno.
4- Matogrosso, Covas and Allerinno.
3- Sesti, Fiorini and Coelho.

GOALS: CAFUNDÉU: Roosevelt 23’ , Coqueiral 39’/72’ , Metir 45’.
LA PROVINCIA DI ROMA: Massaro 18’ , Pizzi 43’/52’/66’.

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Cafundéu – next game’s formation: Vargas, Vandick, Kirs, Sávio Ferrari and Ducas; Anormal, Priotto and Kliek; Heitor, Ernesto Ijak and Ganz Ijak.
Coach: Franz Braddock.
Style of +2

Match’s Referee: Harry Ford(Bazalonia).

“Good morning to all of Assegai, this is Mikaela Eyre reporting live from Cathedral Park in the heart of Leá Monde, where the Assegai Developments National Team has just finished a light training session, in preparation for their upcoming game against No. 9 Ariddia, who comes to Assegai for the first time.

“However, before we turn our heads to Ariddia, we’re going to talk to Assegai midfielder and team captain Ashley Riot about the crushing loss to Qazox.”

She turns to her left and Riot stands there, hands on his hips looking a big glum.

“Ashley, unless you guys can pull off a couple of huge upsets in your last three games, this is pretty much it, right?” she asks him.

“Yeah, it’s going to be very tough to defeat any of our following three opponents,” he says, nodding. “Ariddia may be to much for us—I have to be honest—but I think we have a good shot to beat Wentland, and hopefully, maybe beat Schiavonia, but I wouldn’t want anyone to hold their breath on that one.”

“But, you’ve surpassed all expectations so far, right?” she asks.

“Mos def; we’ve survived longer than anyone expected and it shows how far our football has progressed,” he says. “Maybe we can still get into the Proper—that’s our goal, after all—but if we don’t, it’s been a great ride and we’ve shown the NationStates footballing world what Assegai and YoungWorld region football is all about.”

“What happened at the end of the Qazox game and will anybody be sanctioned?” she asks.

“They made very offensive and vulgar remarks about our team, specifically Samantha Neesa, which is surprising to me seeing as how they had just endured the death of their President and we had expressed our condolences,” he says, shaking his head. “It’s just Qazox being Qazox and it makes the sting of the loss even more painful.”

“Well, thank you for your time today, Ashley and thanks for that giant stuffed penguin you brought me from Ropa-Topia,” she says, smiling.

“My pleasure, Mikaela,” he says, nodding.

“Thanks for tuning in today, Assegai. This is Mikaela Eyre signing off from Cathedral Park. Have a great day!”

The executives at WTV were still confused. Their interactive television service was still in its infancy, but no-one was willing to use it, even though it came free with most broadcasts.

"There is one positive sign, though...at around four twenty yesterday a massive number of people switched from WTV1 to the sports channels."

"Hmm...what were we broadcasting then?"

"Association football. A match between Wentland and some country called Florida Oranges, apparently."

"But why would they switch from football to sport? If they were watching football they must like sport."

"Er...let's watch the footage."

The embedded clock read 16:19 when Andy Saint nodded home a long ball from Keith Bassett and the commentator joyously regaled the audience with the tale of how the Swifts had taken a three goal lead. "And for those of you with the special boxes the games elsewhere are available on the sports channels...Ariddia are currently a goal up against Lisburn Mateys and Qazox are hammering Assegai..."

***

As the whistle blew at the Kenneth Kendall stadium the fans remained behind to watch the electronic scoreboard. The cheers for the Wentland goals had been fairly run-of-the-mill; no-one seriously expected anything other than a routine win against the Oranges and that had been delivered.

But when the scores were flashed up:

ARIDDIA 2-1 LISBURN M

QAZOX 3-1 ASSEGAI DEV


the cheers for those scores were never louder.

With 3 games to go Wentland had a 5 point lead over Assegai and a 9 point lead over the Mateys and Qazox. And Assegai still had games against Schiavonia and unbeaten Ariddia to come.

And suddenly, suddenly, Wentland were a gnat's crotchet away from actual qualification for the World Cup Finals.

RP Cutoff MD17.

Let's make it Harder Better Faster Stronger.

Foly Huck! Goodbye Goal Differential!


The Vilita Jungle Cats entered their 14th match on the World Cup Qualifying schedule with high hopes of success over in-form New Montreal States. The fans at Lunar Park in Seraai were definately up for the match, and Vilita got off to a dream start scoring just 9 minutes in off a wonderful corner kick. However, the joy would end right there for the Jungle Cats.

New Montreal States replied from the ensuing kick off. Then, from the kick off after that, not a minute further and they were 2-1 up. It was 3-1 by half time, and there was never any coming back. It was a crushing 5-1 home defeat in the end, and all the high hopes of qualification began to become doubts. Serious doubts. Vilita entered the match with a 6 point lead over their rivals, and 7 goals differential in their favor. A single victory in the final three games would have all but clinched passage to the World Cup 32 finals.

Unfortunately, the 14th game happened. Coupled with Dance 2 Revolutions 2-0 win over Bushes Been Quaked, Vilita now find themselves just 3 points clear and level on goal differential with 2 full games to play. To make matters worse, The Jungle Cats will have to entertain group leaders Quakmybush in their 15th match, while Dance2Revolution has a comparatively easier matchup against Kericia.

Anastasiana is also in the running, level on points with Vilita but one goal differential behind. Vilita has a game in hand over Anastasiana. All will be decided on Matchday 16, and despite being level on points with Vilita, Anastasiana are not favored for Qualification due to a Matchday 16 trip to Quakmybush. Vilita will get the chance to face Race Track on their home circuit, and it may become a matter of who scores more goals, Vilita against Race Track or Dance 2 Revolution against Alexandrian Ptolemais, with the team who scores the most potentially advancing to the finals of World Cup 32.

Unknown Footballers Rally Team to Draw!

http://spaam.mrdrake.net/flags/liverpool_england.png 1-1 http://spaam.mrdrake.net/flags/sel_appa.png

After a horrible defeat by Qutar, the Turtles have returned to glory and the pride of a nation with a draw against powerhouse Liverpool England. The rookie players, most of whom have only seen a few international matches and some none at all, proved an able and strong defense. They permitted only one goal early on as was initially expected. In the 33rd minute, LE Captain Giovanni Toulmin knocked through the defense and smashed a hard shot straight over the head of Sel Appan keeper Vasily Kashchenko. The Turtles held strong and blocked multiple attacks, including many that came close to scoring a goal.

Early in the second half, LE striker Seth Fair made a goal, but it was declared offisides by the referee, who was much calmer with cards than the Qutar-Sel Appa referee had been. Harold Morris only put up a yellow card when LE defender Dale Correll handled the ball. Acting Captain Colin Patette knew his team could not afford to lose, especially since Sel Appa still had a bye day and rival Qutar did not. He acted as an attacking midfielder and in the 71st minute, he saw an opening. Patette called to teammate Alan Dubrov, who had the ball, but was blocked from scoring. Patette curled the ball into the net, equalizing the match, and found himself a hero. He later returned to the penalty box during stoppage time, but failed to score another goal that would put Sel Appa ahead. Despite not winning, the team surrounded Patette after the whistle and lifted him up while cheering. The Sel Appan section of the crowd roared with applause, knowing a loss would have been fatal.

Coach Charles DuPont and red-carded captain Estevez both congratulated Patette and gave him hugs. DuPont exclaimed: "We're almost there! Congratulations, my friend! All thanks to you!" The quiet midfielder blushed and thanked the team for showing resilience and returning from an upsetting defeat. He started discussing plans for the final qualifying match against Algal States, that might bring Sel Appa to its first World Cup.

Sel Appa maintains a 6-5-4 record with 23 points. They are just one point ahead of Qutar, their rival for third place in group, which defeated Tocapa 4-1. The final qualifying match for the Turtles is against Algal States, a likely victory. Qutar will be playing Anrow, a weak team which has lost all matches, but two, which were draws. The bye day: MD20, has a Qutar-Okielahoma match, which many hope results in a defeat for Qutar. A draw would level the points and leave Qutar and Sel Appa to rely on goal difference. Sel Appa has a 0, while Qutar has +6. Little hope lies there and would be a great loss to a team who has endured strongly.

Current Group Standings:
http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v495/juvanya/wc32d.png

FFSA Unveils New Logo:

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v495/juvanya/ffsa_logo4.png

The logo was drawn by Karli Panet, a 16-year old who lives in Nemnenait. A lifelong football-lover, Karli is her high school's top striker who already has had multiple scholarship offers. FFSA president Henri LePoivre presented her with the promised football autographed by him, the coach, and all the national team's players, as well as a home and away jersey with the new logo her name on the back.

The runner-up was this design by Bju Nnko, a 25-year old cartoonist for the Nemnen Times:

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v495/juvanya/ffsa_logo2.png

The Magic of TeleBaz...

Goal, here, Goal there, Goals everywhere. Well that's what a viewer of the Bazalonia - TGMP match would have thought. It was almost like the Bazalopes wanted to completely and utterly humiliate their opponents. Perhaps this was the result of some psychologists making some break throughs with the team. Either that the team wanted to make a statement.

Either way... something else was going on...something weird, perhaps sinister, perhaps not but something it definately was is weird.

James Gaines without warning decided to resign from the BFSA Presidency, in fact from the BFSA entirely. He had said nothing to his secretary or anyone else in the BFSA, infact, It was at the press conference in regards to the 8-0 win that all he said was.

"I resign from the BFSA and it's presidency. Someone else will answer your questions." and stood down from the podium and left, when his secretary saw that she rushed out to find him. Seing him drive away in his car, she was too late and that was the last anybody had seen him.

Okay, well not strickly true as surely someone would see him in his car, even if they knew who it was or not. James Gaines was no where to be found, no evidence of foul play, no evidence of roberry, no unusal financial happenings, infact none at all. Everything was quiet. It was like he walked off the edge of the earth. Which obviously was stupid, or was it. No one knew.... Well actually that is wrong as well there where at least 3 people that knew, and one of them was JAmes Gaines Himself.

OOC: RP for Cataduanes match

Today was a suprisingly busy day for me. See I'm Fr-Tld's gloves. Usually I just stay on the bench, but today he was given a suprise start as we faced the Cataduanes side. And it was a busy day.

You see the Gnomes were juggling their lineup again and they were experimenting with a 3-6-1 lineup in front of Fr-Tld. Ml-Dni had been pushed forward into the defensive midfield and Ip-Gp was starting in place of Hmr-Pn. Those lineups helped push the Az-cz attack forward, but also let the defense more vulnerable at the back.

The game was an up and down foot race and time and time again I had to deflect shots out of the goal. I was involved in catching, punching and deflecting the ball away as Cataduanes fired shot after shot in on goal.

Thankfully I even had a small role in the first Az-cz goal. See after we caught a shot from a Cataduanes player we quickly kicked the ball up the field to Pizelkaxrovsky who spun around and forwarded it to Uz-Gz who gave the Gnomes a lead, one that I'd help make stand up.

Both teams continued to pepper each other's goal with shots, but as we were still making saves, Pizelkaxrovsky found another goal for the Gnomes to make it 2-0, the final line for the Gnomes match.

I'd finally gotten used to being worn by Nerazzuri after he replaced Zax-Im as captain, and then when Quakmybush came to Az-cz for our friendly on Match Day 18 who ends up wearing me? Zax-Im.

Apparently they had finally succeeded in talking him into coming back to the team, but the way they did it was bringing back the old Az-cz squad that won the Baptism of Fire.

The team went back to the 3-5-2 favored by Levesque, rather than the 4-5-1 they were used to playing. Hubertino and Zax-Im were the starting defensive midfielders, Bn-Dg got a start in place of Levesque, Bub-Rub was starting in place of Uz-Gz and the biggest suprise of all was that Lur-Mn was called back to the team to start in place of the injured Stanleyinho. Even coach Levesque was present in the stadium.

And to start the game the team lived off of Energy and struck first on a nice pass from Zax-Im to Lur-Mn as the two old timers put the Gnomes ahead. But then the Gnomes seemed to return to the way they played that first time through qualifying as the players just seemed a bit rusty and they allowed Quakmybush to hit back for three consecutive goals.

Despite Zax-Im's best efforts to keep the team going, the rust of some of the players, Lur-Mn especially, and the loss of familiarity with the formation and the play just didn't allow the Gnomes to really gel and they let the Quakmybushians leave Az-cz city with a nice win to their credit.

Dazza: Isn't is a great day today, Ricky!
Ricky: Yes, Dazza a great day on TV - at it's another exciting episode of THE FOOTBALL LIFE! I'm Ricky PointyDazza Stick and this is Dazza "perennial mother" Dallas
Dazza: We qualified last game due our draw with Yafor 2, and now our buddies Nedalia have secured their spot
Ricky: The lions beat Snun Nose 39 to secure 2nd spot and qualify. Jeruselem and Nedalia are in the qualification stage, FANTASTIC

Dazza: Along with the other Lions Bedistan too.
Ricky: Bedistan and Nedalia, a marriage made in heaven!
Dazza: (smiles)
Ricky: She's happy, so am I.

Dazza: Yafor 2 played Dumania - and when you draw with Jeruselem, you expect to win! Not today, err Dumania WON.
Ricky: What an upset, Dumania hit the Yafor 2 so hard it's not funny. They beat Yafor 2 FOUR TWO and well, Yafor 2 are done for now.
Dazza: Yes, I'm writing off that team now. Only two teams in it, Tynelia and Cuation for the third spot.
Ricky: Too many losses for Yafor 2 - just too many. Well done Dumania, 15 seconds of fame!

Dazza: The girls from Dorian and Sonya like Dumania are elimated but they drew with Bettians. Yes, a great effort from the girls to draw with Bettia 2 ALL
Ricky: Bettia are not assured of a spot in the top 3 but I have no doubt they will make it.
Dazza: This draw makes their effort to be the best team in Group 10 harder, that's all.
Ricky: We have helped Bettia anyway - indirectly

Dazza: Hey Ricky, you were really looking at that Bettian game. Was it the football or just the girls?
Ricky: Both, both. Actually, I was looking at one of those mirrors too.
Dazza: Looking at yourself or me sleeping on the couch?
Ricky: You're really cute you're sleeping Dazza.

Dazza: Good to see people are looking out for me, hehe!
Ricky: Cuation - Dazza's pick, they won three golden points! The opponent was The Gold TyGrr who are really bad.
Dazza: A good win too, three NIL and they are fighting their way back into the fight for third spot
Ricky: Don't count them out, it's down the last two games assuming Bettia make along with us.

Dazza: We play the third placed Tynelia. We didn't really need the points and Tynelia did. Now, did the Tynelia team impress or flop?
Ricky: Well, Jeruselem are no lazy slacking around team. We aren't charity workers and made sure the Tynelians were in their place - 2nd.
Dazza: We beat them THREE ONE and well, they need to regroup now.
Ricky: Yes, Jeruselem want top spot because Bettia can take from us.

Dazza: The top 4 are still unchanged, Jeruselem top the Group with Bettia 2nd, Tynelia 3rd and Cuation 1 point behind in 4th!
Ricky: It's going to be tight race for 3rd - if Bettia don't trip over and mess it all up
Dazza: We do play Bettia next
Ricky: And we have a bye last game but we don't need to panic, we've qualified

Dazza: Anyone out there seen the new Sel Appa logo?
Ricky: I like it
Dazza: It's cute, but maybe the turtle looks cooler standing.
Ricky: Turtles can't stand Dazza

Dazza: But then Crusaders can't play foot in armour either (smiles)
Ricky: Cheeky girl
Dazza: YAP YAP, woot!
Ricky: Dazza's selling more stuff today.

Dazza: In shops today, there's Dazza dolls on sale.
Ricky: Suitable for ages 10 and above. There are just Dazza themed barbie dolls
Dazza: This one's got the giggle button - like my giggle.
Ricky: I don't know why she didn't do this earlier

Dazza: Err, negotiations over royalties but that's done. Go to ya local store.
Ricky: I'm sure old kids will get one too
Dazza: Oh yes, you can use this to kick footballs - scaled down ones.
Ricky: Well, that's it for the Football life. Nedalia and Jeruselem in, Bettia almost and a fight for the other spot.

Dazza: (waving a doll) Get one of these for your daughters too. It is an official product.

<Crowd of kids turn up, Dazza hands out free dolls>

Group 10:
Yafor 2 [2] Dumania [4]
Dorian and Sonya [2] Bettia [2]
The Gold TyGrr [0] Cuation [3]
Tynelia [1] Jeruselem [3]

Group 5:
Snub Nose 39 [1] Nedalia [3]

Dear Diary,

The moment the potoroos won their previous match against the world’s #1 team Squornshelous, the Errinundera Football Association put out a desperate plea to fans not to descend upon Fanny Moo they way they did last qualifying series at Rodger River. Then, 45 million travelled to the Rodger River to be there as the potoroos earned a place in World Cup 31. The small tree town of Fanny Moo was the venue for the potoroo’s qualifying game this time around and only 1 point was needed from the game to qualify.

Wisely, fans heeded the call and, instead, turned up by the million in the northern mega-city of McKillops Bridge to greet the team as they arrived by riverboat from Squornshelous. Fans had been keen to catch a rare glimpse of the coach, withare, but discovered to their disappointment that he had travelled by trans-national train to Bonang and avoided the brouhaha. Nevertheless a great time was had by all. Millions lined the banks of the drought stricken Snowy River to greet the heroes. The riverboat was forced to stop every few hundred metres so the potoroos could be introduced to the crowds. It took an entire day to travel the last 5 kilometres.

Most of the fans camped where they were on the banks of the river to greet the Paleoslavia team, due to arrive two days later. The EFA and the McKillops Bridge mayor hastily organised for giant screens to be placed along both banks so fans could stay until match day to view the crucial game. The Paleoslavians were given a tremendous reception – they probably couldn’t believe their eyes – as upwards of 20 million people cheered their arrival.

The Fanny Moo match also happened to be the first game at the new Ootopia Forest stadium. It looked magnificent in the broad gully surrounded by rainforest. In the first few minutes of the game a light shower crossed the gully. The clouds parted soon afterwards and the forest sparkled merrily in the sun. A light breeze wafted the scent of the rainforest into the stadium encouraging the 45,000 fans to feel right at home.

withare rested some of the senior players, notably star forwards adicksonia and venu. This appeared to have no effect upon Errinundera who went on a goal-scoring rampage (by potoroo standards) against the hapless Paleoslavia. Led by the irrepressible rosaniel they won 5-nil. cunégonde (15), lyseup (20) and rosaniel (40 & 76) added to their series tallies. Even experienced midfielder arpentek (88) snuck in at the end to score her first ever international goal.

arpentek was actually overshadowed in the midfield by the first year player from Bonang, ysteri. This young gonad was in the thick of things and was instrumental in both goals scored by rosaniel who gave the young woman a glowing endorsement at the press conference after the match. My diary is getting filled with pasted-in pictures of all the marvellous women in the side. Here’s ysteri. I can’t figure out what that black thing in her hair is, though.

http://i55.photobucket.com/albums/g136/regnans/East%20Gippsland/ysteri.png

She’s got rings on her toes. Apparently it’s a family tradition. It means her toes are usually a bit grimy. That’s OK. I’m always happy to help out in my role as boot studder and foot specialist. ysteri graduated from the Bonang Institute of Technology as a dance choreographer late last year. She certainly seems to know all the moves out there on the football field. Her twin brother, este, plays alongside her in the midfield. They seem to have a telepathic understanding of what the other is doing when they play.

Cup goalkickers so far:
16 rosaniel
7 addicksonia
7 lyseup
7 venu
2 cunégonde
2 otelopea
1 arpentek
1 zenoida

Go potoroos. We are now on our way to the Proper. In the meantime the potoroos are aiming to finish 2nd in the group.

Yours sincerely,

mckennap

PS: I just heard on the radio that Goolengook, home to the nation’s most notorious corporate torchers, is threatened by bushfire. That’s ironic. Maybe they should blow up a dam or two to put it out.

Amda-Mo: Joining me today in studio is special guest Rx-Wna, coach of the Yang Knights. But before we get to talking to him, let's go to our interview with Lur-Mn, who's still at the stadium after getting to play in today's match with Quakmybush. You there Lur-Mn?

Lur-Mn: Yeah. How's it going Amda-Mo?

Amda-Mo: Good. How'd it feel to be back on the pitch with those guys?

Lur-Mn: Great. It was a thrill to slip the Pink & Green back on. And to score the opening goal was great too. I just wish we could've played better.

Amda-Mo: Talking to Zax-Im, what's your read on his thought's at this point?

Lur-Mn: I still think he's likely unwilling to rejoin the team permanently, but he certainly was thinking about it after the match. But it would be difficult for the team at this point to adjust. We on the pitch knew each other well, but with out a chance to get timing together it would be difficult.

Amda-Mo: Anything else to add from the match?

Lur-Mn: This was my first time to get to play for the two coaches, but they really know what they're doing. I'm also impressed by their confidence that they felt ok basically wasting this friendly to honor our championship and try to bring Zax-Im back into the fold.

Amda-Mo: I hope you enjoyed your match, but we'll be glad to have you back.

Lur-Mn: Thanks cutie.

Amda-Mo: Rx-Wna, your quick thoughts on the team?

Rx-Wna: I think everythin is still fine. The team clearly wasn't ready for the full Quakmybush squad, but they're still undefeated in qualifying. I think the players will be well rested for the cup and we'll be well in the hunt.

Amda-Mo: Alright, let's look at the cup as a whole. Starting in our group.

Rx-Wna: That last match day with Liverpool England will decide the group. Qutar still ought to take the last qualifying spot as they've got two games they should win, and if they do they come out on top. Sel Appa's poor play, and not the refereeing, really cost them against Qutar.

Amda-Mo: Group 2.

Rx-Wna: Well all three spots are now decided out there, with Alasdair I Frosticus earning the final qualification spot today, joining Commerce Heights and Krytenia. Considering the group's strength all three teams have to be considered dangerous going into the cup.

Amda-Mo: And how about group 3.

Rx-Wna: Quakmybush and New Montreal States are fine at the top. Vilita's still well positioned in third place, but Dance 2 Revolution is maybe coming back to life. It could even come down to goal differential. But I think Dance 2 Revolution will mess something up.

Amda-Fo: And onto group four.

Rx-Wna: Cafundeu's definitely been the suprise of the tournament. After their disappointing loss to Dumania they've rebounded beautifully to shoot past Spaam to a spot in the cup. And this hasn't had the feel of lucking in like Quakmybush did their first time around, but a well deserved and comprehensive qualifying campaign. They could even still slip past Oliverry and The Lowland Clans, the other two qualifiers from the group.

Amda-Fo: Next up is group five, an all Atlantian Oceania group.

Rx-Wna: Indeed. Bedistan and Nedalia are in, and Bazalonia ought to join them. They'd have to absolutley collapse, along with Satiaville playing well to not make it. They'd have to squander 13 points of goal differential advantage against New Hypocria and Satiaville, something I just can't envision.

Amda-Fo: Ok. Then over to group six.

Rx-Wna: Spruitland and Casari are in, and Fmjphoenix could join them, although Marceau State is holding up better than expected. Aurendia's been a big disappointment this cup.

Amda-Fo: Group seven?

Rx-Wna: Home to another suprise team in Assegai Developments, who kept the pressure on Wentland with a big upset of Ariddia, who have qualified along with Schiavonia. Wentland still has the upper hand. They're in with a win against Assegai Developments and a draw ought to be enough, but if they lose they could be in trouble. It's amazing that Assegai Developments still controls their own fate at this stage of qualifiers.

Amda-Fo: Over to the defending champs in group eight.

Rx-Wna: Probably the top heaviest of all the groups, where Squornshelous, Rejistania and Errinundera ran away with qualifying spots and Demot was a strong fourth side, and everyone else total crap. Demot quite arguably deserves a spot in the cup over some of the other sides that will be clawing their way in.

Amda-Mo: Then how about group nine?

Rx-Wna: The top two are suprising to no one in Archregimancy and recent world number one Starblaydia. The third spot is a tight battle between Fort Europe and Northern Caesarea. Northern Casesarea is perhaps the least threatening world power, if you can even call them that. And Fort Europe is one of the strongest disappointing Baptism of Fire participants around. Right now Fort Europe is one point up with a game in hand. If they win either match, or earn a point along with a Northern Caesarea draw, or with a Northern Caesarea loss they're in. But they travel to the Archregimancy before hosting Spaamian Plijous and the Caesareans only travel to Harelsburg, so it could go either way. Definitely a very exciting race to the finish.

Amda-Mo: And onto the final group.

Rx-Wna: Jeruselem is well positioned as group leader and Bettia has stumbled into the second qualifying spot, which leaves a very interesting battle between Tynelia and Cuation. Tynelia has a point lead, but Cuation has a game in hand, so they are actually in control. Cuation hosts Yafor 2 and Dorian & Sonya while Tynelia travels to Seckland in their only match. Tynelia currently holds a plus four goal differential advantage, which I expect to stand up if the two teams end up tied. I think Tynelia will finally make the cup as Cuation will squander points against one of their last opponents.

Amda-Mo: One last question. Do you think Az-cz will finish with the best qualifying record?

Rx-Wna: You know, I think we will. We're playing to well to let Okielahoma derail us. Which means it should come down to the Liverpool England match. Of couse that will be a tough match. But it probably won't mean anything to them, and it would be a huge honor for us. I think that the Gnomes will defend the castle and take home that honor. Even with a draw in one of the games we could still do it. In that scenario we could only be caught by Commerce Heights and Oliverry. And Commerce Heights still has away matches to both of the other qualifiers in their group. And Oliverry hosts Andossa Se Mitrin Vega and travels to Spaam. Both teams are underperforming but have enough talent to steal points. So we could well pull it off even with a draw.

Amda-Mo: Well there's still two matches to go, but to be talking about the best overall record in only are third try through qualifying is simply amazing. Here's wishing good luck to the team as they finish out a splendid qualifying campaign.

Mikaela Eyre is surrounded by a huge crowd that is chanting loudly. She puts one hand to her ear and screams into the microphone.

“Years from now people will ask themselves, ‘Where were you when it happened? Where were you when Assegai pulled off one of the biggest upsets in the history of NationStates football?’ By now, all of Assegai knows, but for posterity’s sake, I am here to report it: Assegai Developments 2 – Ariddia 1!”

As she finishes this statement the large crowd of close to 500 begins chanting very loudly:

“Nothing’s impossible! Nothing’s impossible when you live in Assegai! We took on Ariddia and sent them packing! Now, bring on Wentland! They don’t scare us! We are Assegai!”

The fans roar and begin waving Assegai Developments flags and banners.

“Normally at this time, I would have a player interview, but the Riskbreakers were all escorted out of Cathedral Park after they were carried off the field by a throng of Assegai supporters that flooded the field at the end of the game.

“Nonetheless, let’s recap the goals…

“Despite the feeling that this would be a farewell game for the Riskbreakers, their supporters packed Cathedral Park tonight and were louder than usual. The No.9-ranked Rouge-et-Noirs came out firing and Assegai keeper Edward van de Beauchamp was tested early on, stopping several shots-on-goal in the first ten minutes of the game.

“Assegai finally got heir sea-legs and began to battle Ariddia for control of midfield. By the 25th minute, Assegai began to put together numerous plays that were threatening the Ariddian goal. Spurred on by the loud supporters, Assegai piled on the pressure until finally Sidney Losstarot was able to hurdle a sliding tackle by Ariddian defender Selan Mataitai and slam the goal past the outstretched hands of Xavier Xu.

“The crowd was stunned and there were two seconds of silence that finally erupted into a huge roar that shook the foundations of Cathedral Park. However, the proud Ariddian team fought back. Showing their quality, Ariddia regained control of midfield and started dissecting the Assegai defense. Van de Beauchamp executed numerous incredible saves and punches to keep Ariddia scoreless and frustrated.

“Then, right before the end of the half, Arridia’s Najmah Majrashi lobbed the ball over Assegai defender John Müllenkamp, and scooted around him to go one-on-one with van de Beauchamp and beat him low and to the far post, tying the game 1-1. The goal right before the halftime whistle left the crowd buzzing and wondering if the flood gates would open in the second half.

“Whatever Assegai manager Sir Knight Edgard Zúniga told his defense at halftime, must have been something to behold, because they put the clamps on the Ariddian forwards, limiting them to three shots-on-goal during most of the second half.

“Meanwhile, Assegai’s midfield battled for control of the ball with the more experienced Ariddian players, always ending in a stalemate. As the clock began to near the 90 minute mark, there were several tense moments, and then, came the shocker. Ariddia finally managed to crack the defensive wall and forward Dave Rider raced up to van de Beauchamp but was brought down from behind by defender A.J. Durai, who got the red card, giving Ariddia the penalty kick.

“It was shades of the first Assegai-Qazox game earlier in qualification, with Qazox winning on a late PK that sent a player to the showers. The crowd was stone silent as Rider lined up the ball and took his shot. When van de Beauchamp stopped the shot and curled around the ball, the crowd went crazy.”

The fans around Mikaela suddenly surge to life again.

“Boom! Boom! Boom! Let me hear you say…van de Beauchamp! Van de Beauchamp!”

“The fans seemed content with the draw and as the last minutes of the game ticked away, the crowd began chanting and singing. A draw with Ariddia was something to celebrate. But, Samantha Neesa had something special for her fans.

“With Ariddia pressing Assegai’s defense, Assegai midfielder and team captain Ashley Riot booted the ball up-field. Neesa came flying out of nowhere and chested the ball down and behind the wall of Ariddian defenders. As she hurtled toward the goal, the Xu ran up to intercept her, Neesa danced around him and with the crowd on the edge of their seats and screaming, she blasted a shot deep into the empty net, igniting a colossal celebration in the stands that had Cathedral Park vibrating.

“The shaken Ariddian players hurried the ball back to midfield for the restart, but seconds later the ref signaled the end of the game, and then came the cascade of Assegai supporters flowing in from every end of Cathedral Park, hoisting the players above their heads and carrying them around the field.”

The fans begin screaming around her again.

“Although the stadium is now empty, hundreds of thousands of fans are still celebrating in the lobby of The Great Cathedral and the surrounding area of Leá Monde, including the Leá Monde Underground, which is brimming with people.

“We are about to join the celebration ourselves, so, for the Assegai Sports Network, this is Mikaela Eyre signing off. Assegai beats Ariddia and can still qualify for the Proper!”

Game Summary

http://spaam.mrdrake.net/flags/assegai_developments.png Assegai Developments 2
http://spaam.mrdrake.net/flags/ariddia.png Ariddia 1

[AD]
Sidney Losstarot (29’)
Samantha Neesa (90’)

[ARI]
Najmah Majrashi (45’)

Red Cards:
AD- A.J. Durai (83’)

Dear Diary

It's a somber evening hear in the streets of the country. Hours ago, pubs and the local stadiums were packed to the letter, those that didn't make the trip to Ropa-Topia to show their undying support of the national squad. Hours ago, cheers and music could be heard for miles around, now there is just silence. Hours ago, I was clad in navy and black, face and hair panted over as well, now I'm in a maroon underarmor with my face and hair cleaned. How strange what just a few hours does to the heart of a nation and a person. But when the soul of a nation is their football squad, I guess depressing nights like this are to be expected when a percieved failure happens.

That failure is not only letting tonight's victory slip out of the Marauders clutches, but also the long shot hope of qualification for the Proper. My parents and their friends and teammates had a two goal advantage going into injury time, with the three points all but locked up, yet things seemed to unwravel when the fourth official signaled that there would be five minutes of extra time despite little stoppages in the second half. That signal seemed to spark some life into the Topan squad and their fans. A ridiculous free kick from almost a whole forty yards out went in off the most impossible angles from the crossbar. Stunned, but thinking the match was all but over, the defence slowly took the ball back up to midfield, and prepared for the restart. Well the Ropa forward dashed through the circle the second Cuellar had touched the ball, and literally shoved him over, and began a direct attack on net. Martin was not about to let a pesky no good forward take away the Navy and Blacks glory, and rushed the forward, clearly taking the ball off his feet. Then it happened, the bloody foreigner dove and acted as though St. Louis clipped him. The ref, being quite a dope bought into the charade, and sent St. Louis to a early shower. Out of subs, the Marauders could only cringe as the forward took the penalty on a poor Placibus Hardsworth, who only got the spot due to his large frame. The expected result happened, and the dope ref called the match a draw after the easy penalty. Frustrated, the Marauders quickly left the field, not even exchanging jerseys. Revtron has already told his team that the reserves will be getting time in the next match, and the starters should be prepared for a long autograph session before the match due to the Marauders qualification hopes being dashed by the draw combined with the Alasdair victory.

In other news, I continue my pursuit of the lovely Samantha Neesa of Assegai. When I heard of the horrible names she was called by those backwards Oxen people, I sent her a heart shaped box of exotic chocolates and a dozen white roses along with a card. I heard her and the rest of the Assegai squad will be hanging out at Capri the next couple of days, so I plan to go down there, and hopefully impress her with my surfing abilities. If that fails, I can always challange her to a game of chess to avenge my last loss to the great lass. I'll have another chance to impress her, as a few of the Marauders and me will be attending thier last game against the Schiavonia squad, cheering them on in hopes they can make the Proper.

Kiso Night

The Aeropag Tribune—Missing: Two domestic football leagues. If found, notify slanileague@capitaliztslani.ucs.

Sports: Golden age for Capitalizt SLANI?
케토, 소코 (KETO, SK)—They’re on a fifteen-game unbeaten streak. They beat the unbeatable team, the third-ranked Bedistan Lions. They’ve lost only six of their last sixty-one matches. They’ve even kept us entertained by scoring one hundred and seventy goals along the way. If they don’t do something about it soon, they may be in danger of appearing in a list of the élite teams of international football, right alongside Bedistan, Rejistania, and Starblaydia.

Even when they won the World Cup, the Capitalizts never looked this good. They stumbled through every qualification, sometimes earning a spot in the first round on the final matchday. They rarely got more than three points in the first round. Sometimes, they get knocked out even when they are in position to advance, as was the case with the wacky “RP bonus” elimination in World Cup 21 after a head-to-head draw with Svecia (there are rumors that the people who came up with that tiebreaker went on to officiate the Bedistan–Vilita quarterfinal). Occasionally, through some accident, they make it to the second round, in which they either beat Vilita, lose to some unknown team like Crystilakere in extra time, or get “pwn3d” by Milchama. In the rare case that they beat Vilita, they get an automatic 0–3 loss to Bedistan. And, when they get really lucky, they inherit the record of a team that advanced to the semifinals, then narrowly beat their archrivals and go on to win the World Cup on penalty kicks.

Despite the recent 0–4 loss to Milchama in the second round of World Cup 31, supporters of the Capitalizts remain strangely optimistic for a strong finals performance as their team travels to Everton City again to take on the second-ranked Aces. As one person we interviewed standing outside Isserson Stadium said, “If we can beat the number two team at their own slani stadium, how will we not win the World Cup? I mean, unless Audioslavia comes back…”

The producers of World Cup Review regretted inviting Norman Hacker onto the programme as a summarizer for the Assegai-Ariddia match. They had hoped that his insights having managed a team against both countries would lead to some incisive comment.

Instead viewers were treated to a tirade. "This is outrageous...this is a disgrace...how can Ariddia do this to me? They've dropped 4 points all competition and they're not even trying...they should be four up by now...they're taking it easy...they don't want to face us in the finals, so want us to go out..."

Then Losstarot evaded a desperate Mataitai tackle and beat Xu in goal. "Come off it...what a rubbish tackle...and the goalie should have stopped that...this is ludicrous..."

Hacker cheered up a little when Majrashi scored just on half-time and even more when Durai committed a professional foul on Rider and was red-carded. "He deserved that...a clear goalscoring opportunity...had to go..."

But Rider's penalty was woeful. "Oh my God...he didn't WANT to score...what a prat...probably a Warplands sympathizer..."

And as the commentator tried to describe the winning goal the viewers were treated to some background noise. "Kick her!!! KICK HER!!! SHE'S A BLOODY GIRL!!!! AAAUUGHHHH!!!! YOU BASTARDS!!!! YOU TOTAL BASTARDS!!!!"

Post-game Hacker was asked to summarize. "I'm writing to the Committee to complain. Ariddia should be expelled from the competition. They threw that game. They wanted to screw us. Then again the Committee's screwed us from day one when they redid the bloody draw.

"We were nearly there. I bet Schiavonia will throw it against Assegai now. So we need to take a point from them. And I bet they put a dodgy ref in charge. This is ludicrous. Ludicrous."

Legal action for defamation is expected shortly, from about a dozen people.

Tynelian Hopes Falter With Loss

In what many called a must win game for Tynelia, the team did anything but that in a 3-1 loss to group leading Jeruselem. With Cuation's 3-0 win they have moved to within only one point of Tynelia as Tynelia goes into the bye week. This gives Cuation and extra match to make up the one point differential at the moment which they will probably need as most experts feel Seckland will roll over again in tynelia's final match giving Tynelia an expected win.

However Cuation has two very winnable matches of its own and a sweep would wipe out whatever Tynelia can muster in its final match. In a recent poll some 78% of views expect Cuation to rally past and take the final qulaifying spot on a three match winning streak while Tynelia is expected to stumble home 1-1-1 in its final three. Experts agree that Tynelia's tougher run down the stretch will be the fatal blow to their qualification chances this time around.

One must start to wonder just how many more times can Tynelia improve their overall world ranking and still not qulaify for the Cup itself? As the newer entrants like Quakmybushes, Az-cz and now the Sel Appas and Cafundeus continue to surge past Tynelia into the Cup proper despite another solid Tynelian showing, people have begun to wonder if Tynelia will indeed be able to maintain sufficent funding to their soccer teams and even the local leagues to be able to make a run again at the next Cup.

Cynics such as Matt Simms, a former sports journalist, insist that soccer's time has come and gone and that it should be left to die a quiet death. Others claim they are waiting for another uninspired quarterfinalist run in the Cup of Harmony because "that's what they always do". Truly the fate of Tynelian soccer may depend on these final two matchdays.

Down to the Wire
An editorial by Ford Prefect

During these qualifiers, we've seen a remarkable rivalry between Qutar and Sel Appa. The two teams have fought over the third-place qualification spot for almost the entire time. Algal States intervened and threatened a bit in the beginning, but eventually fell into its place. With one match left for Sel Appa and two for Qutar, the two teams will need every goal they can get to qualify. Sel Appa is currently ahead of Qutar by only a point. A very fragile point. This point is all that holds Qutar back.

At this point, it seems likely the goal difference may make decide who goes forward. Sel Appa has 6 less than Qutar, a difference that is all but hopeful. Sel Appa would need to score an unprecedented number of goals against Algal States to ensure their goal difference goes up enough, while hoping Qutar does not itself get a lot of goals. With so many things hanging in the balance, millions are tense. Especially in Sel Appa, which is only in its 3rd attempt at the World Cup and has been stunning many with its performance.

It is hard to foretell what will happen, but many have predicted the winner of the Qutar-Sel Appa match would get the qualification spot. Qutar won that match 2-0 and may be headed to get the spot, but anything can happen. Both nations are counting on their teams to win out in this rivalry, which has seen attempts of terrorism, near-riots, alleged bribery, and a flurry of cards. The tense rivalry has put these two nations at odds with each other. Any misstep will ruin either nation. It is truly "Down to the Wire".

The Channel 9 News Sport's Section theme starts, echoing into households, pubs and sports bars all over Bostopia. This was the moment most of the males (and some girls) in Bostopia had waited for...the final game being held in Fenton would mean that the nudity laws in the state would apply to sports reporter Kayleigh Lorfale - recently voted "Fittest in Bostopia 2006" by a prominent male-orientated magazine.

[Griffis] And now for news on tonight's game between Bostopia and Turori from the Copsequay Stadium, we cross over to Kayleigh Lorfale, who's LIVE in Fenton.

A large portion of the nation held it's breath...a head-and-shoulders shot of a smiling Kayleigh...and exhaled via a discontented rumbling of the vocal chords.

[Lorfale] Good afternoon everybody, and welcome to Fenton, the "All-Natural State!" As you know, today's match is between Bostopia and Turori. The last game the teams played ended with a one - nil victory via a Dan Reppon goal, his first ever for Bostopia. Tonight's game will feature an unchanged line-up following the 3 - 2 defeat to Alaisdair I Frosticus. Manager Adam Collick stated that the team had "fought bravely to try and gain a point, but [they] were overcome by a better team in the end."

Also, you'll be aware we're in Fenton, where compulsory nudity laws apply - dependant on weather, location and health of course. However, for this and any international tournament held here - in the interests of economic growth from an influx of fans - the compulsory nudity laws will NOT apply to Tutori fans.

However, there will be many facilities available for home fans and any away fans who choose to comply with the law. Up to 20 minutes before the game, face - and body - painting will be available in the team's national colours. Of course, the usual facilities like food and drink will be available in a variety of locations. But until after the game, this is Kayleigh Lorfale, reporting for Channel 9 News, Fenton. Back to Greg in the studio."

Kayleigh turned away from the camera, and started walking away from it, showing a back that had been painted like the Bostopian home kit, with 'LORFALE C9' written on.

[Griffis] Ok...urr...thanks for that Kayleigh. We now move onto our s-second story of the night...

The Daily Quak
Sharks defeat Bushes Been Quaked and Az-Cz

The Quakmybush National Soccer Team is now just costing through their last matches and waiting for the World Cup Proper. The Sharks took on Bushes Been Quaked, a nation with a name quite similar to ours, Matthew Graves scored in the 34th minute and Darrel Ralegigh scored in the 67th minute to give the Sharks the 2-0 win. The team then traveled to Az-Cz for a friendly. Lur-Mn scored early to put the gnomes ahead. But the Sharks came back with three goals, 2 by Jon Fields, and 1 by Cory Sorley to defeat Az-Cz 3-1. The team now has to games left in qualifying, against Vilita and Anastasiania.

Goal Scorers
Sorley - 14
Fields - 13
Fret - 6
Graves - 4
Ralegigh - 2
Plett, Miller, Martin, Baker - 1

Article By: Rick Juras

Hi Netizens,

currently I am in a hurry, so just one thing from me so far: Rejistania won over Haraki 2:0

ANOTHER VERY GOOD GAME FOR CAFUNDÉU PLAYING AWAY

http://img.terra.com.br/i/2006/06/15/356134-7011-ga.jpg
Cafundéu easy dominated the ball possession and controlled the game

Cafundéu was already qualified for the World Cup even before this game, but the team didn’t rest and continued with the good form winning another game, this time with a large result. Defeating Salwinia by a difference of four goals, Cafundéu could show to the world that is a strong team and can become even greater. The defense worked well, defending the team and helping the attack to score, and the midfield was simply perfect. Although the team scored four goals, the attack was the worst sector of the team, but played very well too.

Now Cafundéu will travel to The Lowland Clans to play against their national team. If Cafundéu wins, can have a chance to qualify in the second position, something incredible and unexpected. So, the team has still something to fight for, and they’ll try to get the positive result. The country also wants to see their players returning to their home country, but it’ll only happen in the last game, as the next game will be away. But surely it’ll become a great party!

THE GAME
Salwinia, the worst team of the group, according to the standings, started the game very defensive, fearing the strength of the enemy, as they had bad results even against the worst teams. Cafundéu, knowing that they should play well, as if they don’t, soon Salwinia would start to play better, started the game attacking wisely, using all the resources available. 2nd minute: Heitor received the ball in the right wing from Anormal and shot to the goal. The ball went over the bar.

4th minute: Ray Kirs got the ball from an opponent and reached the midfield, passing the ball to Kliek. The midfielder invaded the area and shot, but the opponent goalkeeper made a very good save, avoiding suffering the goal. 6th minute: In the third attack of the game, Priotto dribbled an opponent and passed the ball to Ernesto Ijak, who was invading the area. The goalkeeper tried to intercept it, but Ernesto hit the ball, sending it over the goalkeeper and into the goal.

10th minute: After the goal, Salwinia had to start to attack, and their first attempt was this one. A winger reached the attacking side from the right wing, invading the area and passing the ball to an attacker who was positioned inside the area. The attacker received the ball and shot, but sent the ball over the bar. 14th minute: Anormal was able to invade the area running since the defensive side. When he invaded the area, he shot to the middle of the goal with strength, but the goalkeeper was right in the place that the ball went. He only had time to put his arms in front of his face, and the ball hit it, going for a corner.

http://img.terra.com.br/i/2006/06/15/356135-4300-ga.jpg
Brahma played some good moments, scaring the opponent defenders

Kliek took the corner kick, the ball went to the area and Sávio Ferrari headed it, but it was a poor heading and the goalkeeper could easily save. 17th minute: Salwinia made a fast counterattack with one of the midfielders, but he couldn’t invade the area. He sent the ball to the area, aiming an attacker, but the goalkeeper Vargas reached the ball first and hold it. 21st minute: Cafundéu started a good chance when Vandick made a good play in the right wing and passed the ball to Heitor, who dribbled two defenders and shot, giving no chances to the goalkeeper and scoring the second goal of the match.

23rd minute: Priotto was controlling the ball in the midfield when he saw Ganz Ijak in a good position and passed the ball to him. The fast attacker dribbled a player and shot with good chances to score, but the ball hit the post and went wide. 25th minute: A winger passed the ball to an attacker of the visitor team. He shoot from outside the area, obligating Vargas to make a great save. 27th minute: The first card of the game was shown when a Salwinia defender fouled Anormal.

28th minute: Ducas tackled an opponent and passed the ball directly to Kliek, who reached the entrance of the area. He later passed the ball to Ernesto Ijak, who invaded the area and shot, missing the goal and sending the ball far away. 30th minute: Kliek lost the ball in the defensive area of the midfield and Salwinia attacker. The defender was going to invade the area when Ducas fouled him. Ford showed him a yellow card, as there was a goal chance(the foul wasn’t violent). A winger took the free kick, but Vargas saved.

32nd minute: Priotto reached the entrance of the area and was fouled. The man that fouled him received a yellow card. Kliek took the free kick, the goalkeeper hit the ball and it hit the post, Heitor headed the ball in the rebound, scoring the goal, as the goalkeeper was still getting up after jumping to hit the ball after the free kick. 35th minute: Salwinia started a good play, with two midfielders changing passes one to another. After that, one of the midfielders passed the ball to an attacker, who dribbled Ducas and shot. The ball hit Sávio Ferrari and Vargas couldn’t catch it, but it hit the post and returned to the area. Ray Kirs got it and sent it to the attack.

39th minute: Kliek received the ball from Anormal and dribbled an opponent. He lost control of the ball, but Ernesto Ijak took the rebound, passing the ball to Ganz Ijak, who invaded the area and shot, missing the goal and sending the ball wide. 42nd minute: A Salwinia defender headed the ball after a corner, obligating Vargas to make a good save. 45th minute: Heitor received the ball from Priotto and crossed the ball to the area. Ernesto Ijak missed it and fell in the ground, but Ganz Ijak headed it, but sent the ball wide. Ernesto Ijak asked for a penalty, the referee had doubts, but the linesman said that this wasn’t a penalty, so the referee showed Ernesto a yellow card. The first half ended.

http://img.terra.com.br/i/2006/06/15/356148-9552-ga.jpg
Many fouls happened during this tough game

The coach of Cafundéu, Franz Braddock, made one change in the team, making the team a bit more defensive. Mercegues entered in Ernesto Ijak’s place. Salwinia also made some changes, but they didn’t have many hopes, as they were losing the game by a three goal difference. The second half started with Cafundéu still attacking, facing a sad and disappointed Salwinia with few will to fight. Cafundéu’s attacks weren’t so strong as in the first half, but still were dangerous.

1st minute: Anormal used his strength to knock down two opponents and reach the entrance of the area, shooting with strength another time. This time, the ball went over the bar, hitting a television camera, that was broken. He said that he won’t pay another camera. 3rd minute: Salwinia had a good attack, reaching the entrance of the area with a midfielder, who shot from there. The ball went wide. 6th minute: Heitor received the ball from Kliek near the area, but was fouled few seconds after getting the ball. The violent opponent received a yellow card. Kliek crossed the ball to the area and Ganz Ijak headed it, but the opponent goalkeeper made a fantastic save.

10th minute: A winger of Salwinia was able to reach the attacking side of the visitor team. He crossed the ball to the area, and an attacker headed it, but he sent the ball over the bar. After ten minutes of the second half, Braddock put Brahma in Kliek’s place, as the midfielder wasn’t having a very good game, although it wasn’t bad. 14th minute: Mercegues received the ball from Priotto and tried to invade the area, but the opponent defender gave no space to him. He passed the ball to Heitor, who shot the ball, but missed the goal.

17th minute: Anormal made a long range pass to Ganz Ijak, who dribbled an opponent and shot the ball from outside the area. The goalkeeper made a fine and secure save, holding the ball without difficulties. 20th minute: Mercegues slipped and Salwinia started a counterattack. An attacker received the ball inside the area, and tried to score with a nice shoot. The ball made a good curve, but the goalkeeper Vargas hit the ball with his fingers and avoided the goal.

24th minute: Mercegues received the ball from Vandick in the right wing and ran to the attack. Later, he passed the ball to Brahma, who invaded the area and was blocked by a defender, who sent the ball to the attack, clearing the danger. 28th minute: Ray Kirs passed the ball to Heitor after doing a very good play in the left side of the field. The attacker received the ball and dribbled an opponent, but wasn’t able to invade the area, so he passed the ball to Priotto, who was reaching the entrance of the area. He received the ball and shot as soon as he got the ball, giving no chance to the goalkeeper and scoring a beautiful goal for Cafundéu.

http://img.terra.com.br/i/2006/06/15/356192-6879-ga.jpg
Game was full of good goal chances

30th minute: Mercegues lost the control of the ball again and let Salwinia start another fast counterattack, this time reaching the attack with a midfielder, who crashed with Ducas. Ducas had to leave the game injured, and Wantuirso entered in his place. 32nd minute: The visitor team reached the attack again, this time with an attacker who shot the ball in the midfield area. The shot was very weak and the ball didn’t even reach the goal, stopping near the entrance of the area.

35th minute: Brahma received the ball from Sávio Ferrari in the midfield and started to run, dribbing an opponent and reaching the attack. He was fouled by an opponent, who complained with the referee and received a yellow card because of that, not because of the foul. Vandick took the free kick, but missed the goal. 38th minute: A player of the visitor team was holding the ball in the midfield when Priotto fouled him. The referee only warned him, but Priotto said something offensive in portuguese to the referee and received a yellow card.

41st minute: Both teams stopped to run, as the result was already defined and Salwinia couldn’t draw or win. So, during the last ten minutes the ball was held in the midfield, although some goal chances were seen. Like in this minute, when Anormal received the ball in the midfield and shot, missing the goal and hitting the same camera that he broke before. At least it was already broken. 45th minute: Mercegues and Brahma started to pass the ball in the midfield, and soon the referee whistled, ending the game.

After the game, Priotto talked with the media: “It was a very game for us, and for me, of course. I received a unecessary card in the end of the game, but I couldn’t control myself. But, with this result, we were able to show all our power to the world.” Mercegues said: “Yes, we played well today and deserved this good victory. We have now two games to play and I’m confident that we can still get good results on them.” Ducas just said: “Argh! It hurts! Now I’ll have to stay some days in the medical department of the team, just because of this crash.”

The coach Franz Braddock also talked with the press after the game: “Yes, it’s a very good feeling. We’re qualified and playing very well, scoring four goals in only one game. It’s true that I wasn’t expecting such a great work rate, but now that we reached this far, I want to see my team going even higher. We’re in the World Cup, but we still can get a better position in the group, so why don’t try to get it?” Now the team is travelling to The Lowland Clans.

http://img.terra.com.br/i/2006/06/15/356239-9074-ga.jpg
Cafundéu scored four goals against Salwinia

SALWINIA 0x4 CAFUNDÉU

Place: unknown stadium, in Salwinia.
Attendance: unknown.
Referee: Harry Ford(Bazalonia).
Man of the Match: Marcos Afonso Priotto(Cafundéu).

http://spaam.mrdrake.net/flags/salwinia.png SALWINIA: no team released.

http://spaam.mrdrake.net/flags/cafundeu.png CAFUNDÉU: Vargas, Vandick, Kirs, Sávio Ferrari and Ducas(Wantuirso); Anormal, Priotto and Kliek(Brahma); Heitor, Ernesto Ijak(Mercegues) and Ganz Ijak.
Coach: Franz Braddock.

Ratings:
9- Priotto and Heitor.
8- Vargas, Anormal and Brahma.
7- Vandick, Kirs, Sávio Ferrari, Ducas, Kliek, Ernesto Ijak and Ganz Ijak.
6- Wantuirso and Mercegues.

GOALS: CAFUNDÉU: Ernesto Ijak 6’ , Heitor 21’/32’ , Priotto 73’.

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Cafundéu – next game’s formation: Vargas, Vandick, Kirs, Becão and Sávio Ferrari; Anormal, Priotto, Brahma and Kliek; Heitor and Ganz Ijak.
Coach: Franz Braddock.
Style of +2

Match’s Referee: Hubert Tornat(Quakmybush).

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Goalscorers after 14 games:

10- Ganz Ijak
5- Heitor
3- Anormal
2- Ernesto Ijak
1- Becão, Kirs, Brahma, Kliek and Priotto.

The Fantanna Files
Chapter One: Odd Beginnings

As he stood over the bottles, pipette ready he found he couldn't do what he done many times before. He drew back to steady himself, his mind ablaze.... On the one hand he had to do it, on the other he really couldn't do it anymore. As he found himself in this dilemma Brian Fantanna thought back to how this all began.......

Some time in the past
Well before World Cup 32 Qualifying

Brian Fantanna had it all going for him; great wife, great kids and a great job. Some people may have smirked at his job but he loved every single minute of it. He was kit manager for The Islands of Qutar, he been there for every training session, friendly and World Cup match. He'd met greats both old and new, and they treated him as a equal, he went out for beers with the team he was part of it all, he may have never played a minute on the pitch but he felt part of the team.

That all changed one fateful November evening. Brian wasn't by nature a gambling man, maybe a few pounds in the slot machine down the pub but nothing even near remotely big. So when he emptied the savings account he knew he could go back later that day with that money and more..... lots more. The reason he was so certain was because of the conversation earlier with defender Gary Rowe, now Gary had some friends in the racing circuit, horse-racing that is. Apparently a race was being rigged by who he didn't really listen to, although he really should have. But all that was on his mind was 10-1 odds, and it was a sure thing. How he could send his kids to the top schools that they deserved, buy his wife the gifts she deserved and he wanted to get her.

So he went and got all he could scrape from the savings account, 10,000 Qutari Pounds. But he thought why stop there, its a sure thing so he did something very out of character, he went to a loan shark, all the time thinking its a sure thing.....its a sure thing. So after a very unsavoury meeting with a very unsavoury fellow he had Q£60,000 to spend and Q£600,000 to make. So he made his way down to the racing track nervously clutching his briefcase....

After the race

He stood clutching his head in disbelief, the thought verbalising "But....But it was a sure thing.....". He thought of his wife, his kids he let them all down, how would he get the money back, and who he owed it to..... The mafia are all the movies say are and much worse. He didn't want to longer over the thought of explaining that he couldn't pay them back. As all these thoughts raced through his mind three gentlemen approached him.

Can I help you gentlemen? He murmured to the gentlemen. The most well-dressed of the three replied coldly in a strange accent; Mr. Fantanna, I think it is you that can help us...

Back in the present
Moments before the Qutar vs Sel Appa match

So that's how he ended up there, drugging The Islands of Qutar national football team, just a few drops in the water and after half time they'd be sluggish and under perform. His friends, his country he'd betrayed all because of one stupid moment. But no more, he couldn't do it! It didn't matter what happened to him the bigger picture, The Islands of Qutar must go through and whatever the strange gentlemen were planning couldn't happen!

He walked back out the room feeling good about himself for the first time in a long while. Just then his phone rang, as he looked at the number the feeling of good vanished and was replaced with one of dread.......

RP Cutoff MD 19.

Another Brick in the Wall.

The Aeropag Tribune
AEROPAG, JI • 0.10 g Au • 131–02–06

Capitalizts football team killed in plane crash
NY–FJORDALEN, BEDISTAN—An engine failure in the Air Paripana aircraft transporting the Capitalizt SLANI football team to Everton City for their World Cup qualifier match against Krytenia resulted in a crash outside Ny-Fjordalen, killing all but three of the passengers.

The exact cause of the failure is unknown, but it is believed that the unusually cold weather in Prontera the previous night caused some damage to the plane. “Even if the weather did have an effect, it was most likely only a trigger for a pre-existing defect in this particular plane,” Air Paripana spokesperson Yves Polenz said in a press conference. Despite this assessment, the company has grounded all of its flights indefinitely until it can confirm the safety of its entire fleet—over nine hundred planes.

The match, which was expected to test if SLANI can compete for a top-ten spot in the KPB rankings, was instead contested by a squad of fourteen UCS natives playing for the Prontera Bulldogs. Despite a request by Capitalizt SLANI that the match should be postponed or cancelled due to the tragedy, the Krytenia Aces took the field at Isserson Stadium, where they were met by a squad of fourteen Prontera Bulldogs players who were teleported to the site only minutes before kick-off. The Aces dominated the unprepared Capitalizt team throughout the match, and walked away with an 8–1 win, the worst defeat of any team that has ever qualified for the World Cup.

Of the survivors of the plane crash, Panthers and Capitalizts coach Randall Thacker received no permanent injuries, and is expected to be on the sideline for the Capitalizts’ match at Alasdair I Frosticus; backup goalkeeper Pedra Ambrana is in critical condition at a local hospital, though no details are available; and star striker Alejandro Bolúfero lost a leg in the crash, but is recovering at the hospital.

Capitalizt SLANI has not announced what squad it intends to send for the Alasdair I Frosticus match, only that it will not send the Prontera Bulldogs squad used against Krytenia. An announcement regarding a memorial to be commissioned for the twenty-five people lost in the crash is expected prior to the game.

——————————

Davido Agiaro • 배성군 • Brittany Bailey • Jay Chandler • 추손준 • Brent Elliott • Thorsten Gelhaar • Przemysław Grabmann • 하천근 • 홍보군 • Friedel Kuban-Schenllfrieder • Swen Küsperth • Judy Miles • Roman Ostheimer • Σταμάτιος Παλαιολόγος • Dan Powers • Alexander Rohrheim • Arnold Sims • Δημήτρης Σκαλκώτας • 손사사 • Wilma Todd • Włodzimirz Tokay • Cord Tserkesidis • Axel Vaskor • 원이춘

Tables Outsourced!!!

Vilitans inform themselves that they need a draw against Quakmybush!




Group 1:
W D L GF-GA Pts
[1] Liverpool England 15 13 1 1 50-9 40 Q
[2] Az-Cz 14 13 1 0 43-8 40 Q
[3] Sel Appa 16 7 5 4 36-31 26
4- The Islands of Qutar 15 8 1 6 32-23 25
5- Algal States 15 7 0 8 21-37 21 E
6- Okielahoma 14 5 1 8 21-23 16 E
7- Cataduanes 15 4 4 7 20-28 16 E
8- Tocapa 15 1 3 11 17-38 6 E
9- Anrow 15 0 2 13 6-49 2 E


Az-Cz and Liverpool England will be battling it out for the top spot in Group 1, but pride and KPB points are all that is at stake here as both teams have already clinched a place in the Finals. Sel Appa has already completed its qualifying campaign, and will be watching from the sidelines as The Islands of Qutar host Okielahoma. Anything other than an Okielahoma victory will see The Islands of Qutar sneak past Sel Appa into the final qualifying position.

Group 2:
W D L GF-GA Pts
[1] Krytenia 15 13 1 1 55-16 40 Q
[2] Commerce Heights 15 12 2 1 57-25 38 Q
[3] Alasdair I Frosticus 15 8 1 6 27-29 25 Q
4- Elves Security Forces 16 6 5 5 28-25 23 E
5- Ropa-Topia 15 6 3 6 34-32 21 E
6- Turori 14 5 3 6 21-22 18 E
7- Bostopia 14 4 1 9 22-37 13 E
8- The HURD 15 4 0 11 19-41 12 E
9- Nomadasia 15 1 0 14 8-44 3 E


Group 2 is already over, Although Krytenia and Commerce Heights will once again be fighting for pride as the Group title is on the line, just as it was in World Cup 31. Elves Security Forces is just 2 points behind Alistair I Frosticus, unfortunately, The Elves have already completed their entire campaign, and Ropa-Topia is four points back securing a place in the finals for the Frosties. Turori will be looking to close their campaign with a pair of victories to move them up to 4th in the standings.

Group 3:
W D L GF-GA Pts
[1] Quakmybush 14 12 0 2 43-7 36 Q
[2] New Montreal States 15 12 0 3 47-17 36 Q
[3] Dance 2 Revolution 15 9 2 4 32-20 29
4- Vilita 14 9 2 3 28-20 29
5- Anastasiania 15 8 2 5 26-20 26 -
6- Bushes Been Quaked 15 4 0 11 12-26 12 E
7- Kericia 16 3 3 10 13-29 12 E
8- Alexandrian Ptolemais 15 2 3 10 10-44 9 E
9- Race Track 15 1 2 12 11-39 5 E


Yet another group where the top 2 are seperated from the pack, but not each other. Neither Quakmybush or New Montreal States has drawn a game yet, but Vilita will be hoping to change that. Vilita need at least a point from their matchup against Quakmybush to gain the upper hand in the qualification battle against Dance 2 Revolution. Vilita will host Quakmybush in Vilita for both teams 15th game of the campaign. A loss for Vilita would mean they would have to overcome a 5 goal differential on the final matchday, unlikely as both vilita and Dance 2 Revolution face the two worst teams in the group. It really is get a point or get to the Cup of Harmony for the Jungle Cats.

Group 4:
W D L GF-GA Pts
[1] Oliverry 14 13 0 1 42-11 39 Q
[2] The Lowland Clans 16 12 1 3 37-8 37 Q
[3] Cafundeu 14 10 1 3 24-14 31 Q
4- The Mice of Miceland 15 5 5 5 22-19 20 E
5- Spaam 15 5 5 5 26-24 20 E
6- Andossa Se Mitrin Vega 14 4 5 5 20-23 17 E
7- Backwardistan 15 5 2 8 24-33 17 E
8- Salwinia 15 1 1 13 10-39 4 E
9- The Deathbat Republic 15 1 1 13 9-43 4 E


Group 4 has been over ever since Cafundeu supporters started bringing flaming torches to their matches. So, in otherwords, it was never in doubt. The only challenges in this group potentially came from Spaam, Andossa Se Mitrin Vega and Backwardistan, a trio who have combined for 0 posts in a cup that, oddly, Spaam was somehow attempting to host at one stage.

Group 5:
W D L GF-GA Pts
[1] Bedistan 15 13 1 1 56-20 40 Q
[2] Bazalonia 15 11 1 3 38-13 34 Q
[3] Nedalia 16 10 3 3 45-19 33 Q
4- Sativaville 14 8 1 5 31-22 25 E
5- Green Wombat 14 7 1 6 37-36 22 E
6- Snub Nose 39 15 5 4 6 22-32 19 E
7- Nebuleux 15 1 5 9 18-33 8 E
8- The New Hypocria 15 1 3 11 8-39 6 E
9- The Great Monty Python 15 1 1 13 12-53 4 E


Like Group 4, there is not a single match remaining in this group that has any significance. A surprising debut performance from Snub Nose 39 sees them with an outside chance at 5th in the group, while the Lions of Bedistan and Nedalia sandwich the Bazalonians in the group table on the way to the World Cup Finals.

Group 6:
W D L GF-GA Pts
[1] Casari 15 12 2 1 48-15 38 Q
[2] Spruitland 15 11 3 1 48-17 36 Q
[3] Fmjphoenix 15 10 1 4 37-24 31 Q
4- Marceau State 14 7 4 3 36-28 25 E
5- Aurendia 16 6 1 9 23-31 19 E
6- Spindomia 15 5 1 9 20-30 16 E
7- Noremark 15 4 3 8 28-40 15 E
8- New Propaganida 14 4 0 10 11-31 12 E
9- Choobie International 15 0 1 14 9-44 1 E


Choobie International did not show up to play this cup. Well, they did, yes, but they just stunk and would be looking a good bet for the Cup's Wooden Spoon if it weren't for Schnabo. Another group where the title is up for grabs, Spruitland's wabbits will have to hope for some luck to catch Casari, but they probably could care less, as they are already in the finals along with the dissapointment of World Cup 31, Fmjphoenix.

Group 7:
W D L GF-GA Pts
[1] Ariddia 15 11 3 1 46-17 36 Q
[2] Schiavonia 15 10 4 1 38-14 34 Q
[3] Wentland 14 8 4 2 33-13 28
4- Assegai Developments 14 8 2 4 29-22 26
5- Qazox 15 7 1 7 38-27 22 E
6- Lisburn Mateys 15 7 1 7 27-27 22 E
7- The Mushroom Kingship 16 5 3 8 16-28 18 E
8- Stromboland 15 1 1 13 13-46 4 E
9- Florida Oranges 15 0 1 14 7-53 1 E


The glorious demise for the Mushroom Kingship ceases to exist a day earlier than the rest of the teams in Group 7, while the whipping boys of World Cup 31 are left in limbo with a key matchup against Wentland still to play, the winner to be in the driving seat for a debut appearance in the World Cup Finals. It is a swap of Assegai's World Cup 31 group mates Qazox who scalped many top clubs on the way to the World Cup 31 finals, but have already been eliminated this time around.


Group 8:
W D L GF-GA Pts
[1] Errinundera 15 12 2 1 47-19 38 Q
[2] Squornshelous 14 12 1 1 49-18 37 Q
[3] Rejistania 15 11 2 2 45-17 35 Q
4- Demot 14 8 2 4 41-22 26 E
5- Rorysville 15 7 1 7 31-21 22 E
6- Commerce Heights JSY 15 4 4 7 22-29 16 E
7- Haraki 16 3 3 10 10-27 12 E
8- Paleoslavia 15 1 2 12 8-49 5 E
9- Voskadouria 15 0 1 14 4-55 1 E


Demot couldn't pull off another magical run, while Group 8 is the only Group in the cup where the top 3 teams still have a shot at the title. Squornshelous is in the driving seat with a game in hand against Demot before the cups final matchday, while Errinundera proves their World Cup 31 appearances was no fluke, having already booked their place in the finals for a second time.

Group 9:
W D L GF-GA Pts
[1] The Archregimancy 16 13 2 1 44-10 41 Q
[2] Starblaydia 14 10 4 0 36-10 34 Q
[3] Fort Europe 15 9 2 4 27-19 29
4- Northern Caesarea 15 9 1 5 36-24 28
5- Rordia 15 6 4 5 24-22 22 E
6- Spaamanian Plijous 15 4 2 9 21-35 14 E
7- Raging Penguins 15 4 1 10 19-25 13 E
8- Harlesburg 14 3 2 9 18-29 11 E
9- Schnabo 15 0 0 15 7-58 0 E


Hello Wooden Spoon! Unless O-for-15 Schnabo pulls a wonder victory out of a hat on the final matchday, they will be the Wooden Spoon winners for World Cup 32 Qualifying. Meanwhile, The Archregimancy has already clinched the top spot and qualification despite Starblaydia's two games at hand. Newcomers Fort Europe will be hoping to old off Northern Caesarea for the third spot and a trip to Geisenfried and Milchama.

Group 10:
W D L GF-GA Pts
[1] Jeruselem 16 13 3 0 55-10 42 Q
[2] Bettia 15 11 1 3 43-22 34 Q
[3] Cuation 15 10 2 3 32-15 32
4- Tynelia 15 9 3 3 28-14 30
5- Yafor 2 15 6 2 7 24-28 20 E
6- Dumania 15 4 3 8 19-28 15 E
7- Dorian and Sonya 15 3 3 9 14-25 12 E
8- Seckland 14 0 3 11 6-50 3 E
9- The Gold TyGrr 14 0 2 12 10-39 2 E



The best defensive team in World Cup 31 qualifiers, Cuation, have not been so perfect this time around and will be looking to hold off perenial 4th placed finishers Tynelia on the final matchday with Qualification on the line. Tynelia will be confident of victory against winless Secland, while Cuation will need to work a little harder to beat Dorian and Sonya, only a win will ensure qualification. A draw for Cuation could be enough to allow Tynelia through on goal differential.

Cuation Round Up

Dorian and Sonya [1] Cuation [2]

D&S led for so long but showed why they are struggling, a lack of confidence and some poor defending allowing Cuation to win the match with a late flurry. Things had been equal for the first thirty minutes when D&S Number 9 snuck in at the near post unmarked to head home a good cross from the right.

Cuation pushed forward but with little reward, Speedy and Keane came on for the full backs as Cuation bombarded the home team's box with Jude acting as sweeper. One of his long clearances found Speedy unmarked on the left, the defenders backed off as he cut inside and shot, the ball flying past {the unsighted keeper.

In injury time, another long ball, this time down the centre set up the winner but it should have been cut out. The keeper came to collect it then halted, confusing the defence and Keane pounced, chipping the keeper with his volley.

New Montreal States [3-0] Cuation

A tough friendly but Cuation should have done better, lacking any fight with only keeper Jude Tanner keeping NMS at bay for so long. Jean-Baptiste Colbert finally breached Jude's goal in the 43rd minute, his pace allowing him to get behind the defence with a quick burst before sliding the ball through the legs of the advancing Jude.

Straight from the second half kick off, Cuation had gone 2-0 down after Fallen's misplaced pass gave away possession. Billy Corcoran finished off a fine passing move by rounding the keeper before smashing the ball into the net.

NMS relaxed but still managed to score a third, a corner was headed towards goal by Harry Hoolia, his header brilliantly tipped onto the bar by the keeper, the rebound falling kindly for Théodore Brisebois to complete the rout.

Bettia [2-1] Cuation

Cuation's 5-4-1 system almost paid off but while Cuation showed the virtue of teamwork and set plays, Bettia had the individual skill going forward to win the game. Cuation struck first, winning a corner on the right, Downing played it short, Cole crossing before the defence could recover, Lu Fei heading home unmarked.

1-0 up at half time, Cuation sat back and defended for their lives but as the half wore on, the full backs had a torrid time as the wingers ran riot. First, Egryn Vaughan left Cole on his rear with one piece of trickery and his cross evaded everyone but managed to find the back of the net with the otherwise solid Jude stranded.

Eri Kurniawan won the game, luring Butcher into the challenge before dancing inside. His long shot across goal was perfection itself; Jude could do nothing to stop such an effort. 2-1 down, Cuation started to push forward but it was Bettia who came closest too scoring, Owen Richards and Eurys Ffagan forcing brilliant saves while Gwarthen Rhydderch headed over when it seemed easier to score.

Cuation [5] Seckland [0]


It was a day for the attacking midfielders in the squad, rampaging forward at will and ignoring their strikers. Seckland were overrun and never even had a shot but being ten men down for 89 minutes will do that too you. The ref had no choice when Bradley Wells assaulted Lu Fei as the striker leapt for a long ball but to send the defender off.

Fallen curled the free kick into the top corner and soon grabbed a second, a late run into the box paying dividends as he drove home a Downing cross. It seemed like he would have a hatrick but it was Lewish who got the match ball.

A Downing corner was cleared too the edge of the box, Lewish meeting the ball sweetly on the volley, the ball flying into the net to make it 3-0. A fantastic dribbling run that took out five players and then Bush the keeper made it 4-0 and in injury time, he headed home for the hatrick after Bush failed to claim an early Butcher cross.

Dumania [1] Cuation [2]

Tynelia's shock win over Bettia has put pressure on Cuation and despite a 2-1 victory, the signs are not encouraging. Cuation was made to work in the second half to hold their lead and prevent an embarrassing draw but in the first half, it was too easy.

The away fans chanted for the losers of the BoF as their team used the wings well. An accurate Downing cross was headed on by Lu Fei for Rual to volley past Quintin Taljard. It was Lewish who set up the second, getting to the by-line before lofting the ball too the far post for Lu Fei to head home.

Whatever Neil Pretorius said at half time worked wonders; Cuation found themselves harassed off the ball and forced to defend, even when Rual was replaced by Scott. When Jude spilt a simple Gerto Prinsloo long shot, Leon Leon pulled a goal back to set up a nervous finish but in the end, the Cuation backline was too strong to let in a second.

Jeruselem [4] Cuation [1]

Cuation suffered a heavy defeat that knocked them off third place, a deflected effort from Fallen to pull a goal back was all Cuation really mustered. Cuation will be disappointed and know they could have done better against the top two, which may cost them when the group is done.

Kate Bush scored twice as she led the team, a worthy replacement for the missing Dazza, Big Al headed home a third with Abrams Tunk able to outmuscle Irwin before coolly finishing past the advancing Jude to make it 4-0.

Tynelia beat Dumania by two goals to zero and push ahead of Cuation by benefit of losing one less and drawing it. They are on form and Cuation has to pick themselves up from this inconsistent form and fast.

Bye

The Cuation team trained hard with the game with Tynelia looming, it is a vital game for both sides with both sides hoping for a win. Tynelia managed a late rally to secure three points against D&S to put themselves five points clear but we have a game in hand. Yafor 2's 5-1 defeat puts them on the verge of elimination and they will need a lot of luck to turn it around.

Cuation [0] Tynelia [0]

Yafor's second half slump in the group has seen them knocked out in a day of draws in group ten. Neither side will be happy; Tynelia needed the win to push themselves away from Cuation while the home team will now be feeling the pressure as they play catch up.

Tom Gordman has played well this tournament and deserves to go to the world cup, today he showed his class. His communication meant his defence cut out a lot of attacks but when called upon, nothing got past Gordman. Even when Rual broke clear of an offside trap, his low shot was turned around the post by the keeper.

Jude was less busy as Cuation managed to keep a shut out against Tynelia twice. Connor MacDougal should have done better then to stab at the ball so weakly in a late goal mouth scramble but it still took a brilliant save for Jude to stop the ball on the line with one hand. Not a game for the neutral unless you really like defensive football.

The Gold TyGrr [0] Cuation [3]

Tynelia's 3-1 loss meant that Cuation have become favourites to qualify with two games left. It was a professional performance in front of a hostile crowd, Jude was left with little to do and while Cuation pushed forward rarely despite controlling the midfield, they won at a canter.

Lu Fei muscled a defender off the ball and rifled the ball home, Rual rose highest to head home a Fallen free kick and sub Keane finished the scoring when he was played clear. Lewish and Fallen both failed to convert their chances or the result might have been even higher.

Cuation [3] Yafor 2 [0]

Cuation took advantage of their game in hand to go into third place with a two point’s advantage and within touching distance of second place. It leaves Cuation only needing a draw and for Tynelia to get anything less then a 3 goal win.

Yafor started off brilliantly, Prince Seberd controlling the play as Yafor, despite already being out of the cup, pressed for the victory. Jude Tanner was forced into action several times in the first half but at half time, it was Cuation that led.

In injury time, Jude claimed a corner and booted it all the way up to just outside the Yafor penalty box, Ameran Bulod came out to kick it but missed the ball. Rual pounced on the error, just able to force the ball into the net despite heavy resistance from Yafor.

The goal deflated Yafor and inspired Cuation to dominate the second half, a Butcher cross controlled by Lu Fei then poked under Bulod, the keeper having a poor game. Sub Keane scored, failing to control a simple pass, he was able to have a second stab at it, the ball trickling over the line.

Dear Diary,

It’s getting better and better. The potoroos are now sitting on top of the group 8 table. Who would have imagined that at the start of qualifying?

Last week's Fanny Moo game was the last World Cup 32 qualifier to be held in Errinundera with our final 2 games being away, including today’s match against Voskadouria that ended up 0-4 in our favour.

I enjoyed visiting the Voskies. As usual I checked them out on the web before we departed. The UN rates them as a civil rights lovefest. Cool. Shame I’m about to be a dad. Wouldn’t have minded a bit of lovefesting. They’re moneyhuggers though. I noticed in the news that there are allegations of politicians there being in the pockets of major corporations. And people are walking off their jobs to join a gold rush. I’ll stick to my studs and foot massages thank you very much. Life couldn’t possibly be more rewarding than that.

They scored pretty well on the Utopia scale too. The University for the Global Environment gave them 68 out of 100. They said that their materialism brought down the score.

One thing the Voskies do have is culture. Here in Errinundera artistic types tend to just sit on a branch and stare into the forest. Oh, and they have some spotty paintings up in Monkeytop. Anyway, they treated us to theatre and concerts and art galleries. It all gave me a headache to tell the truth. But then I’m only a boot studder and foot massager.

After one of the concerts rosaniel happened to mention that there were two concert pianists in the team. I’ve already mentioned phazel, dear Diary, but rookie striker carltu is also a dab hand with the imitation ivories. Our hosts begged that they give a recital. phazel declined saying that she now concentrated fully on football. carltu wasn’t half so modest and agreed to perform provided she could sleep with the man of her choice from the audience.

News got around. The concert hall was packed. I don’t know much about music so I can’t say if she was any good but the audience, mainly young men, seemed to think she was outstanding. The applause was delirious.

Anyway, her boyfriend was in the audience and she chose him. Pretty cute, huh?

Another picture to paste in my diary. I love the smell of clag in the evening.

http://i55.photobucket.com/albums/g136/regnans/East%20Gippsland/carltu.jpg

The next day she topped it off with a goal. She has beautiful footballer’s feet – muscular, strong bones, sturdy ankles. Experts smile when they see them. She treats me condescendingly, though. Her loss.

The match was a funny one. Voskadouria might be cultured but it’s lousy at football. It was one of those games where one side was so bad they made the other side play badly. For 85 out of the 90 minutes it was an untidy, boring game with few highlights. The other 5 minutes? Sensational! rosaniel scored twice in 3 minutes in the first half (36 & 39) and when carltu kicked her first international goal in the 79th, adicksonia (80) promptly stole the ball from the kick-off, ran down the field, passed to his captain who passed it straight back for him to rocket the ball into the net. rosaniel said afterwards in the press conference that it was the best goal she had seen in World Cup 32 qualifying.

With one match of the round still to play (Demot v Squornshelous) Errinundera has shot to the top of the group 8 table. A funny thing happened today. It was reported on the news that Demot had won 3-2. This was later revealed as a hoax. If it turns out to be true after all then the worst Errinundera can finish is 2nd. Mind you, Errinundera is the only team to have beaten Squornshelous and I wouldn’t like to see that record spoiled.

The last round sees us off to Commerce Heights JSY who have only had 4 wins but managed to hold us to a surprise draw earlier in qualifying. rosaniel is keen for the Errinundera to enter the Proper with a big win under its belt.

Cup goalkickers so far:
18 rosaniel
8 addicksonia
7 lyseup
7 venu
2 cunégonde
2 otelopea
1 arpentek
1 carltu
1 zenoida

Yours sincerely.

mckennap
stud and massage expert – just ask zenoida

PS: Goolengook hasn’t needed to blow any dams yet.

Stick a Fork In'Em
A Matt Simms Editorial

First of all thanks to Real Sporting Magazine to give me a chance to tell everyone the truth about the farce of a sport called soccer. They gave me the boot from my old job on that lame talk show and the courts rejected my lawsuit but the voice of truth refuses to be silent! As usual Tynelia is finding ways not to qualify and will probably prove to be a bunch of losers once again when they watch Cuation beat some chicks- who don't belong in any sports except ice skating and gymnastics, to move on in this o so exciting World Cup. Come on does anyone even remember who won the last one?

The fair weather fans are already jumping ship leaving the three or four people who actually like the sport wringing their hands like a bunch of crybabies waiting for the final blow. Sure the Coach says they have to go out and do their Bettia impersonation again and really run up the score agaist Sickland or whoever the hell they're playing, like last time. LIke these losers are actually going to pull it off. In fact you heard it hear first, those chokers are going to LOSE to Sickland and i'll laugh my ass off when they do. No way these chumps are going to do anything.

Oh sure they have the Cup of Losers to go to afterwards but this team is so bad they can't even make the semis there, talk about pathetic! I can ionly hope those three no life losers who actually like soccer move to a place that might actually have a good team so Tynelia can shut down all their local leagues. Well the ones that haven;t already gone bankrupt the past four years. That way we can spend time and money on real sports like football- only chicks there are the the cheerleaders, which is where they should be. If i actually cared about soccer i would say if they made it so you need to have a pair to make the team then i bet Tynelia would have already made the Cup. So i guess its a good thing they didn't so i wouldn't have to hear even more garbage about soccer.

So yeah cry me a river soccer fans or grow up and play some real sports. I'm Matt Simms, the Voice of Truth and you heard it here first!

(*Disclaimer- Matt Simms' statements are his and his alone and do not reflect the views and/or attitudes of anyone else on the Real Sports Magazine staff)

<At a Jeruselem football party>

Dazza is drunk as usual while Ricky Pointy Stick is sober because he does not drink a lot, the rest of team is in different states of drunkeness.

Dazza: Hey Pointy Stick!
Ricky: Eh, big or little pointy stick, Dazza?
Dazza: Big pointy stick, not Rocky.
Rocky: Looks like you're having a good time Dazza!

Rashina: She always has a good time at parties, if she remembers anything in the end. Well, we was conceived from a party like this!
Dazza: Or where I am in morning, woah I'm drunk! I've still dressed, amazing.
Ricky: I tell ya what! Let's put a bet on who's going make the qualifiers - Tynelia or Cuation?
Dazza: Sure thing, Cuation for me!

Ricky: Tynelia is still my pick.
Rashina: Cuation, better goal difference
Rocky: Sorry Dad, Cuation because of their current form.
John Jerk: How's my naughty little girl here?

Dazza: Wobbling all round the place, like Mum does ...
John Jerk: You don't have remind me Dazza, about that day.
Dazza: I tell you what Ricky, if Tynelia make it - then I will release those secret nude photos. If Cuation make it, you have to sit next to Big Gay Al for the rest of World cup in the bus!
John Jerk: Now, that's a challenge Ricky.

Ricky: I'm not sure this is good idea.
Rocky: Don't you want to see those photos Dad? I want to!
Rashina: Err, your call Ricky. Dazza putting down a challenge.
Dazza: I maybe drunk, but I'm game! OK, shameless but I'm allowed to be

Ricky: Sure, it's a deal.
Dazza: Photos if Tynelia make it and Big Gay Al for you if Cuation do.
Rashina: This will be interesting!
Rocky: Both ways, it will be fun. Nude Dazza photos or Dad getting hassled by a gay guy

John Jerk: These photos ... where did they come from?
Rashina: When she are a cheerleader, before becoming a footballer. They would have destroyed by most girls her age later but Dazza keeps things like that. Work money, you can say
John Jerk: Oh I see, can it wait after the World Cup final please?
Dazza: After my kids is born, so don't worry Dad.

Confusion and Chaos
We were here, but they stayed there

All over the world fans, players, staff and officials travelled to foreign countries to play Matchday Nineteen of the World Cup Thirty-Two qualifiers. The only problem was that in every Group, one fixture was reversed essentially making it the same match-up as Matchday Nine. On Matchday Nine, Starblaydia travelled to Harlesburg to play out a 1-1 draw, Rajko Dakic the scorer. So, the match appeared to be Harlesburg Vs Starblaydia, so Harlesburg stayed at home and prepared for the visit of the number-five team in the world. Officials at the Starblaydi Football Association, however, knew better and prepared their team for the real match, Starblaydia Vs Harlesburg.

With both teams still in their home countries, however, this match could not take place. This situation was repeated across every Qualifying Group, so ten matches are to be played tomorrow, including Starblaydia hosting Harlesburg. Thanks to The Archregimancy defeating Fort Europe, however, Starblaydia are guaranteed to finish in second place in this group, whether they win or lose their two remaining matches. Though currently with an undefeated record, four draws for Starblaydia is outweighed by the two draws and a loss that the Orthodoxy have suffered.

Starblaydia haven't finished Second in a Qualifying Group since World Cup 25, and before that World Cup 19. Does this represent the beginning of the slippery slope of Starblaydia's inevitable fall down the rankings? Or is this simply a blip before Starblaydia's inevitable ascent to world glory once again? As with most questions of this nature, time will tell.


Starblaydi Goalscorers
Kaza Matranga 8 from 13 appearances
Rajko Dakic 6 from 13
Stracinho 4 from 13
Nuno Volaré 3 from 13
Tommas Coalville 3 from 9
Christian Averette 2 from 13
Stephen Adams 2 from 13
Keztarr Mahezihim 2 from 13
Betanii Marrones 2 from 7
Lawrence Asante 2 from 6
Carlos dos Santos 1 from 13
Aleksandr Rekeseski 1 from 5
Talenii Karo 1 from 7
Zamoskao 1 from 8
Durin Bazrimar 1 from 5


Final Score from Harlesburg:
http://spaam.mrdrake.net/flags/starblaydia.png Starblaydia P - P Harlesburg http://spaam.mrdrake.net/flags/harlesburg.png
(None) - (None)
Next Match: Starblaydia v Harlesburg

Starblaydia RPs in World Cup 32
Starblaydia Roster (http://forums.jolt.co.uk/showpost.php?p=12044387&postcount=8)
Dawn (http://forums.jolt.co.uk/showpost.php?p=11989617&postcount=3) (Pre-Cup)
Immortal Souls (http://forums.jolt.co.uk/showpost.php?p=12070926&postcount=65)
Mixing Metaphors (http://forums.jolt.co.uk/showpost.php?p=12080743&postcount=112)
Predator Rajko (http://forums.jolt.co.uk/showpost.php?p=12087269&postcount=147)
99 And Out (http://forums.jolt.co.uk/showpost.php?p=12172394&postcount=404)
Chaos and Confusion

…Suddenly, Samantha Neesa woke up. Her naked body, covered in sweat, glistened in the moonlight streaming in through the blinds in her bedroom.

“What was that?” she asked herself. “It seemed so real... I thought we had really lost at home to Wentland… I guess... I guess it was only a dream.” That said, she sighed deeply and dried her body off with a towel.

She poured herself a cool glass of water and walked over to the window. The moonlight coming in through the blinds caressed her naked body as she moved slowly through the darkness.

Thoughts of the past week skittered through her mind.

With the huge ruckus following the Riskbreakers’ huge upset over Ariddia and the week-long celebration that followed all over Assegai Developments, Assegai team manager Sir Knight Edgard Zúniga felt the team needed to be away from all distractions in preparation for the bigger-than-ever, do-or-die game against Wentland. After the team was escorted from Cathedral Park, they packed and flew to Capri in Elves Security Forces for a couple of days of rest and relaxation before training for the Wentland game.

She smiled and giggled quietly in the dark. The team spent most of their time hanging out between Severus Snape’s Snapilicious Pizza Parlor and Snaptastic Pins, a bowling lane located on the other side of Snape’s mansion in Capri. They had a good time, even when members of the rival E.S.F. squad dropped by to visit.

Young E.S.F. star Kiso Night made it a point to make her enjoy her stay, handing her a bouquet of roses and a heart-shaped box of chocolates and cracking silly jokes to make her laugh. “He’s such a cutie,” she thought to herself as she placed a hand on her hip. A bit young, but that didn’t stop him pursuing her.

Thinking about him gave her goose bumps and she blushed to herself in the dark.

Her thoughts drifted to the practice sessions the last few days. The team realized the importance of defeating Wentland. Winning that game was their focus. Nothing else mattered and they practiced like a team possessed.

Maybe all the practice is what triggered this nightmare. She shook her head and yawned, stretching her arms out and then rubbing her sides and hips.

She laid down fresh linen and went back to bed.

“We can beat Wentland,” she thought to herself. “That loss… it was just a bad dream. We can beat them…”

She drifted to sleep…

Match-Up

http://spaam.mrdrake.net/flags/assegai_developments.png Assegai Developments
vs.
http://spaam.mrdrake.net/flags/wentland.png Wentland
@ Cathedral Park – Leá Monde, Valendia, Assegai Developments

THE HOLY EMPIRE HERALD

HOLY EMPIRE QUALIFIES FOR WORLD CUP FOR FIRST TIME SINCE WC4
Anonymous Imperial Squad of Do-Nothings Succeed Where Others Fail

By Anna Comneno

The Holy Empire international football squad - noticeable this season solely through its almost total failure to engage with the outside world - today succeeded where several far more deserving teams (notably Elves Security Forces, Ropa-Topia, Bostopia and Turori) had failed by qualifying for the World Cup overnight for the first time since World Cup 4; this despite negative goal difference and a game in hand.

Officials from the Holy Empire Football Association were said to have briefly considered resigning their qualification spot in favour of one of the 'more deserving' squads before collapsing in a fit of hysterical laughter at the concept. "Despite thoroughly failing to deserve this fluke qualification in any way, shape, or form, we're going to milk it for all it's worth" said a senior HEFA official, apparently already rubbing his hands in glee while planning his free junket through a dream portal to either Geisenfried or Milchama.

Such is the level of stunned amazement within the nation at their shock qualification, that no one even knows the names of the players, though HEFA are said to be considering taking a moment to actually post a roster now that the squad have qualified for the tournament proper.

National team coach Juan Tzimisces, who actually played in the first four world cups, is said to have already placed a bet on the squad finishing dead last in their first round group.

THE MONASTIC TIMES

NATIONAL PILGRIMAGE CONTINUES
Football Team Qualfies for World Cup

By Fr. Nicholas the Scribe

Those few Archregimancy football fans not trying to pinpoint the location of the Not Quite So Protecting Veil of the Theotokos' Second Best Friend, or the Most Glorious Iconostasis of the Near Caves of Voksp, today woke up to the news that the national football team had qualified for the World Cup. As expected. Above Starblaydia. Which wasn't quite so expected. As the Starblaydi media have themselves pointed out, this was Starblaydia's first failure to finish top of their qualifying group since World Cup 25, and only their second such failure since World Cup 19.

Strange to report, but the Archregimancy must surely be entering World Cup 32 as one of the favourites to progress out of the first round. A senior archimandrite, speaking on condition of anonymity, promised that he would pray for the team to be knocked out of the tournament as early as possible in order to increase the opportunities of supporters for soul-strengthening suffering.

CAFUNDÉU LOSES ANOTHER GAME AWAY AND CAN’T CHANGE ITS POSITION

http://img.terra.com.br/i/2005/11/27/281966-9683-ga.jpg
Keller commemorates one of the goals

After a complicated game, against a strong opponent, Cafundéu lost to The Lowland Clans in its fifteenth game in the competition. Playing for the second position, both teams had a average game, but the experience of the Lowland Clans players made the difference, and the home team could get the three points in front of their supporters. Cafundéu stayed in the third position with only a round to go, and can’t go down or up, so for Cafundéu the last game will be only a simple game.

The next game of the national team is against Backwardistan at home. Supporters of the national team will fill the stadium to commemorate the qualification for the World Cup, so the team is ready to play a good game, ending the qualification round with a victory, giving a present to the supporters. The coach Franz Braddock decided to use the main team in this last game, as a preparation for the World Cup, although he is not sure if he will use the same players in the competition.

THE GAME
Both teams used their best players in this game, and started it attacking, trying to score the goal first, as both teams were strong with a good attack. 2nd minute: Joeira passed the ball to Jopolik, who reached the entrance of the area and shot with strength. Vargas was able to hit the ball with his fingers. Becão took the rebound and cleared the danger. 5th minute: Cafundéu attacked with Brahma, who received the ball and crossed it to the area. Ganz Ijak headed it, but the ball went over the bar.

7th minute: Anormal received the ball in the midfield, knocked down an opponent and passed the ball to Kliek. The midfielder reached the entrance of the area and passed the ball to Heitor, who was invading the area. The attacker received and the goalkeeper left the goal to intercept the ball. Heitor lost the control of the ball and made a bad shot, missing the goal sending the ball wide. 9th minute: McGinney was with the ball in the midfield and shot from outside the area, missing the goal. The ball went over the bar.

12th minute: Ray Kirs made a good play in the left side of the field, passing the ball later to Priotto. The midfielder noticed that there were many players in the area, so he decided to shot directly to the goal from outside the area. It was a good shot, but the goalkeeper Liptings made a good save. 15th minute: Jurgensen ran since the defense area, but Anormal took the ball from him. He lost the control of the ball, so Toldo got it and invaded the area. Sávio Ferrari appeared and took the ball back.

http://img.terra.com.br/i/2005/09/11/260376-5085-ga.jpg
Marking was very important in this game

19th minute: In a fast play, that started with Doninho, McGinney received the ball between two opponents and shot before falling to the ground. His shot was very good, and the ball entered in the goal. 1x0. 22nd minute: Vandick passed the ball to Brahma, who was asking for the ball in the midfield. He controlled the ball and passed to the attack. Ganz Ijak received it and shot, but the goalkeeper Liptings made a good save. 24th minute: Brahma fouled Doig and received a yellow card.

27th minute: Joeira changed passes with Doig, who had to pass to Jopolik after Anormal strengthened his marking. Jopolik received the ball and crossed it to the area, but Toldo couldn’t head it and the ball went wide. 31st minute: Heitor suffered a violent foul near the area. The opponent defender received a yellow card. Kliek took the foul and was near to score, but Liptings saved again. The game was difficult, with good chances for both sides, but The Lowland Clans had the advantage.

33rd minute: Delvin made a long range pass to McGinney, who dribbled Priotto, Sávio Ferrari and passed the ball who passed trough the area. It passed in front of the goalkeeper Julio Vargas and reached Djukashenki, who hit the ball with his left leg and scored the second goal of the game. 35th minute: Kliek passed the ball to Ganz Ijak, who invaded the area and shot, but the ball hit Mackingley and the ball went wide. Cafundéu was losing many good opportunities and the coach was very worried.

38th minute: Doig passed the ball to Djukashenki, who shot the ball from outside the area. Becão interecepted it, but the ball continued inside the area. Toldo got it and tried to shot, but he could only hit the ball, that went weak to the hands of the goalkeeper Vargas. 40th minute: Corner kick to Cafundéu. Vandick took it and Becão jumped to head the ball, but only could do a light hit on it. Anormal headed the ball later, this time with strength, but the ball went over the bar.

44th minute: Joeira passed the ball to Djukashenki, who had problems in dribbling Anormal and lost the ball. Injury time: Jopolik received the ball in the air inside the area, heading it to the goal, but he missed the goal, sending the ball wide. After this play, the referee decided to end the first half, and The Lowland Clans players could left the playing field happy with the current result of two against zero, while Cafundéu’s players already knew that the coach wouldn’t be happy with them.

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The Lowland Clans missed many chances

For the second half, only Cafundéu made changes. Braddock decided to put Hauser in Brahma’s place, and both teams remained with the same style that they used in the first half. 2nd minute: Doig made a long range pass to the attack, and Toldo got the ball, dribbling a defender and shooting the ball to the goal, missing it and sending the ball wide. 5th minute: Jurgensen tackled an opponent and passed to Joeira in the attacking area. The midfielder shot, but Becão intercepted the ball.

7th minute: Ray Kirs started a good play, dribbling an opponent and crossing the ball to the area. Anormal jumped more than his opponents and headed, scoring the goal of Cafundéu in the game. 10th minute: Delvin made a good play in one of the wings and passed the ball to McGinney, who reached the entrance of the area and passed the ball to Jopolik. The attacker received the ball, but lost the control of it and lost the ball to Sávio Ferrari, who sent the ball to the attack.

13th minute: Djukashenki crossed the ball to the area, where Toldo and Jopolik were waiting to score. Jopolik tried to head the ball, but missed it completely, so the goalkeeper Vargas could make an easy save. After this play, the coach Casey Dellet made two changes in his team, putting Menheim in Jopolik’s place and putting the young Keller, who had his first call-up to the team, in Doig’s place. 16th minute: Anormal passed the ball to Hauser, who had difficulties to invade the area and lost the ball.

20th minute: In a good and fast attack, Joeira passed the ball to Menheim, who shot before invading the area. Vargas hit it with his fingers and the ball went for a corner. McGinney took the corner and Toldo headed the ball, but Sávio Ferrari was able to block the ball and send it to the attack. 23rd minute: Priotto received the ball in the midfield and controlled it for some moments. Later, he passed the ball to Heitor, who shot. The ball with Jurgensen and was near to enter in the goal, but it hit the post and left the playing field.

25th minute: Kliek had a good chance to score in a free kick. It was a dangerous free kick, and Kliek took it very well. But he had bad luck, as the ball hit the post and left the playing field. 28th minute: Ray Kirs lost the ball to Keller and asked for a foul, but the referee ignored him. Furious, he started to discuss with Keller, and the referee gave him the yellow card. But he continued to discuss, furious and uncontrolled, so the coach had to change him, putting Fuchs in his place.

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The home team commemorated the good result

30th minute: Keller showed that he has some ability, dribbling Anormal and reaching the attack, but he was too fast and lost control of the ball. Menheim got the ball and shot, but he missed the goal and sent the ball wide. 32nd minute: Fuchs passed the ball to Hauser, who was in a difficult situation being marked by two man. But he could pass the ball to Ganz Ijak, who tried an effect shot near the end of the field. The ball made a good curve, but went over the bar.

35th minute: If Cafundéu still was hoping to get a good result, this hope ended in this minute. Toldo passed the ball to McGinney, who saw Keller invading the area and sent the ball to him. The midfielder made an amazing dribble on the goalkeeper Vargas and hit the ball with his chest to score the goal. After the goal, the coach Franz Braddock returned sad to his bench and just said that his players were making a good job, although they were losing the game.

39th minute: Anormal reached the entrance of the area and shot, but the goalkeeper Liptings made a good save. 42nd minute: Keller received the ball in the midfield and passed it to McGinney. The captain dribbled and opponent, but Becão tackled him and started a counterattack, but Kliek didn’t control the ball. 45th minute: Djukashenki stopped and sit on the ball, waiting for the end of the game. Heitor came and shot the ball, and Djukashenki fell on the ground. After that, the game ended.

Even after losing the game, the players of the Cafundéu national team made good comments about themselves and about the game. The goalkeeper Vargas said: “Losses are part of football, and we can’t say that we played badly today. They just played better than us, that’s it, so nothing to worry about.” Hauser also talked with the media: “This wasn’t our best game, so we know that we can play better. And you need to understand that we played against a better team, with many good and experienced players.”

But the assistant coach João Canabrava didn’t like the game: “They should play better if they want to wear the Cafundéu shirt. There’s plenty of good players waiting to play for the national team, and they deserve a chance.” The coach Franz Braddock just praised his players: “They did a good job in this game, too bad that we lost, but they fought hard. They won so many games and could give us a place in the World Cup, so I have nothing bad to say about them.”

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At least Cafundéu scored a goal

THE LOWLAND CLANS 3x1 CAFUNDÉU

Place: unknown stadium, in The Lowland Clans.
Attendance: unknown.
Referee: Hubert Tornat(Quakmybush).
Man of the Match: McGinney(TLC).

http://spaam.mrdrake.net/flags/the_lowland_clans.png THE LOWLAND CLANS: Liptings, Delvin, Mackingley, Jurgensen and Doninho; Joeira, Doig(Keller), McGinney and Djukashenki; Jopolik(Menheim) and Toldo.
Coach: Casey Dellet.

http://spaam.mrdrake.net/flags/cafundeu.png CAFUNDÉU: Vargas, Vandick, Kirs(Fuchs), Becão and Sávio Ferrari; Anormal, Priotto, Brahma(Hauser) and Kliek; Heitor and Ganz Ijak.
Coach: Franz Braddock.

Ratings:
8- Djukashenki, McGinney, Liptings, Keller, Anormal and Priotto.
7- Delvin, Mackingley, Jurgensen, Doninho, Toldo, Vargas, Vandick and Kliek.
6- Joeira, Doig, Menheim, Fuchs and Ganz Ijak.
5- Jopolik, Kirs, Becão, Sávio Ferrari, Brahma, Hauser and Heitor.

GOALS: THE LOWLAND CLANS: McGinney 19’ , Djukashenki 33’ , Keller 80’.
CAFUNDÉU: Anormal 62’.

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Cafundéu – next game’s formation: Vargas, Vandick, Kirs, Becão and Sávio Ferrari; Anormal, Priotto, Mercegues and Kliek; Heitor and Ganz Ijak.
Coach: Franz Braddock.
Style of +2

Match’s Referee: Yann Girouard(New Montreal States).

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Goalscorers after 15 games:

10- Ganz Ijak.
5- Heitor.
4- Anormal.
2- Ernesto Ijak.
1- Becão, Kirs, Brahma, Kliek and Priotto.

[Griffis] ...and of course all of Bostopia sends it's condolences to the Unified Capitalizt States. As a sign of our unity, the flags at sports arenas over Bostopia have been lowered to half mast.

And now we cross over to Kayleigh Larfale, who's in The HURD for Bostopia's final qualification game of World Cup 32.

[Larfale] Thanks Greg. Tonight's game in the Thompson University Ground is being attended by many thousands of Bostopian fans who are hoping to see Bostopia inflict a Matchday 20 defeat on the HURD. Bostopia lost the home game 3 - 2, one in the series of many battling defeats the national side has faced this qualification.

But, if we go back to the start of the tournament, Bostopia's chances were dented by the redrawing of groups, giving us a slimmer possibility of qualifying. However, for national team manager Adam Collick, it has surely been a learning process.

Not least having to a game infront of thousands of naked fans, let alone two games against a team of robots.

This is Kayleigh Larfale, reporting for Channel 9 News, Bostopia.