NationStates Jolt Archive

Official Announcement of Cute Bunny Burger* Corporation

The administration of Cute Bunny Burger, Inc. (further referred to as CBC, Inc.) is now pleased to announce the opening of its first branches in the United States of Allanea. We thank our investors for enabling us to start out with 158 branches in 20 different states of Allanea, as well as in several other nations.

The Cute Bunny Burger Corporation also thanks the people of Callisdrun for allowing us to open branches in Callisdrin and Drun, the two biggest cities in that nation. We are proud to serve our burgers to the Callisdrunian workers and students.

Furthermore, as of now, we pledge that every year, at least 1% of our profits would be donated to charities. Further, a CBC fund will be made available, to the sum of at least one million Universal Standard Dollars to send prize-winning children of CBC customers into colleges and universities.

We would be happy to receive recommendations as to where new branches of CBC are to be opened, or market surveys from new places.

*The CBC would like to note that the majority of hamburgers and other food are not made of actual rabbit meat, but rather of beef, pork, or sheep as appropriate locally. Rabbit meat, as well as meat of other animals, is available. Call your local CBC branch for details.

OOC: Basically you post here if you want to have CBC branches in your nation. If your nation is relatively free-market, just post about said branch/es being opened, as CBC would probably expand to any nation it was allowed to expand to.

I shall consider! Depending on the Department of Trades, we may allow you to establish & operate such stores in our nation. If established would you use meats from your nation or ours? We have no trouble either way, but just wanting to know your oppinion! Would you allow this to open up jobs to the people of San Haven?

What ever happens we will donate $1,000,000 peso to the CBC Fund annually!

Thanks
Dept. Trades!

Official Response from the CBC

We generally use local-made meats, both because it is safer - the meat is more fresh - and because we try to conform to the tastes and religious convictions of the locals, so for example we would not be selling pork in a heavily-muslim area.

DEMOCRATIC SOVIET REPUBLIC OF KAHANISTAN
Ministry of Commerce

Greetings!

In my first action as the new Minister of Commerce, I would like to recommend on behalf of the Kahanistanian people that four CBB establishments be established in all six major cities of Kahanistan, except the capital, Najaster, which has a larger population and could not do with less than ten.

We have limited free markets, but corporations are allowed to do business in Kahanistan if they follow regulations and pay corporate income tax.

We might advise CBB to tell customers exactly what kind of meat really is in each item on their menu, as the numerous Jews and Muslims who reside in Kahanistan would not appreciate being fed pork thinking it is rabbit. Conversely, the Christians, Pagans, Satanists, and atheists in Kahanistan do not wish to be denied pork and fed artery-clogging beef instead.

Signed,
Angus McKimble,
Minister of Commerce

OCC: I have considered for you to establish a total of 16 stores throughout the nation, 6 being based in the Capital Old Havana! Please note the 'pork' issue is not an issue! We have only a small number of Muslims (25,000) and are spread throughout the nation. Islam is not really accepted. Theres no racial behavior against such people, or anything, but the majority are Catholic/and or of Christian Influence. I suppose they feel out of place. However its a free country, they may live here if need be!!!

CNB, translated.

"This is Callisdrunian News Broadcasting...

Today, an Allanean restaurant chain called 'Cute Bunny Burger' opened two establishments in Callisdrun; one in Callisdrin and one in Drun. As the name suggests, they primarily serve hamburgers made from rabbit meat. Both saw plenty of customers on their first day in business.

There is some understanding that in a few countries, rabbit burgers might not be popular, owing to the fact that the animals are considered 'cute.' However, rabbit meat, whilst not as popular as deer or boar, has long been eaten in Callisdrun, and is not considered to be a very unusual dinner item. Burgers made of it, though, haven't previously been served on a regular basis.

Other restaurant owners say they are not worried, as they believe there is enough room in Callisdrunians' stomachs for a niche market for rabbit burgers.

Now, on to the weather..."

OOC: Excellent, San Haven.

IC:

Official Response from CBB to the government of Kahanistan

We will be glad to comply with these reasonable regulations. Even in Allanea, all manufacturers of food are obliged to denote the components of all food sold in a way that a customer may reasonably read. As such, we will soon open the CBB branch in Kahanistan, and begin to locate and establish places for branches.

We will appoint Rabbi Joshua R. Halperin as the Executive for Kahanistan operations of the Cute Bunny Corporation, and thus enable a better link between CBB and it’s Kahanistani customers.

The Cute Bunny Burger corporation, Inc. will be only pleased to continue having a fruitful working relation with both the Kahanistan government and its people, and to provide – as we always do – good and timely service, fast delivery, and tasty bunny-burgers!

Sincerely yours,
R.H. Kates,
CEO, CBB, Inc.

OCC: Could, with you permission we sponsor Cite Bunny Burger Corporation (CBC). We will pay you US$250 Million annually to promote our company Del Rio Automobiles! Buy purchasing a burger, they could win a Rugged XL or whatever. You know like MacDonals does, promotes things as such!
Is this possible???

OOC: Certainly, just make an IC post about it and we will immediately begin their promotion in San Haven.

IC Post??? What's that??

OOC: an in-character post.

OOC: http://ns.goobergunch.net/wiki/index.php/IC

Basically what Allanea said, but you're probably new, so this site will explain better than either of us can.

Official Announcement of Cute Bunny Burger* Corporation

The administration of Cute Bunny Burger, Inc. (further referred to as CBC, Inc.) is now pleased to announce the opening of its first branches in the United States of Allanea. We thank our investors for enabling us to start out with 158 branches in 20 different states of Allanea, as well as in several other nations.

The Cute Bunny Burger Corporation also thanks the people of Callisdrun for allowing us to open branches in Callisdrin and Drun, the two biggest cities in that nation. We are proud to serve our burgers to the Callisdrunian workers and students.

Furthermore, as of now, we pledge that every year, at least 1% of our profits would be donated to charities. Further, a CBC fund will be made available, to the sum of at least one million Universal Standard Dollars to send prize-winning children of CBC customers into colleges and universities.

We would be happy to receive recommendations as to where new branches of CBC are to be opened, or market surveys from new places.

*The CBC would like to note that the majority of hamburgers and other food are not made of actual rabbit meat, but rather of beef, pork, or sheep as appropriate locally. Rabbit meat, as well as meat of other animals, is available. Call your local CBC branch for details.

OOC: Basically you post here if you want to have CBC branches in your nation. If your nation is relatively free-market, just post about said branch/es being opened, as CBC would probably expand to any nation it was allowed to expand to.

Yes, I would like two Sausage-Egg-and Cheese Biscuits, two cinnamon rolls, hash browns, and a small coffee. WHAT DO YOU MEAN YOU DON'T HAVE HASH BROWNS!

<A new add has been ruining throughout United Earthlings>
"Hungry- why wait, come in to one of our fine diners and enjoy a country cooked meal like mom use to make. I'm thinking CBC. :D

"Tahoj, I really do understand your request but you see... This is the nation of several ethnic groups... any preference causes problems at the next H1SR match - maybe worse. You see?"
The Allanean shook his head at the speech of the KaMaRian official. "We are not "efficient" enough?"
"Tahoj, how can I even assume your corporation is lacking efficiency. You however see that the transliteration laws exist for a reason... multiculturality without preference is what kept this nation together - and the national team. So you see, there is the law that a company name needs be transliteratable into rejistanian alphabets, Kejut Ivani Ivurkeris is surely not." The rejistanian does speak with a strong accent and the way he messes up the company name is horrible. "Either the name is transliterated or translated to be able to be accepted in Rejistania."

Jeruselem Government News

Queen Mariah opens first "Bunny" store

You heard it here first. The Allanea fast food chain Cute Bunny Burger Corporation has opened it's first store in Jeruselem. In a grand opening ceremony for it's first store in the holy city of Jerusalem, ironically in the Catholic area. Queen Mariah I attended the ceremony and launched proceedings wearing a pair of bunny ears in line with her weird sense of humour.

She said when opening a plaque for the occasion "I, Queen Mariah I of Jeruselem, officially open the first Cute Bunny Burger Corporation store in Jeruselem. If you're wondering about these bunny ears, Hugh Hefner sent to me for my 18th birthday. This is the first time I can actually use them. So everyone, the store is open for business. Enjoy the food, ladies and gentlemen".

When a reporter asked if she is disturbed the CBC stores included rabbit, she replied "That's why rabbits breed like rabbits, not that I'm an expert on rabbit breeding, just human reproduction."

Two Catholic Archbishops were there to sample the fare and gave the CBC cautious approval. "It's a lot better than some of trash they sell around here. I'll be asking for a store in vicinity of my Cathedral now." commented Archbishop John of Beersheba.

OOC
Allanea wouldn't have issues opening these stores in Jeruselem due to the fact you are GP member. Just don't use GM food.

Allanea Times

As we speak, the new fast-food store chain – Cute Bunny Burger – is sweeping Allanea. Already, 2,500 branches were open in the United States alone, and more are to come. Several branches were opened in Jeruselem, catering to the wide variety of pilgrims that frequent that nation – with Queen Mariah herself present at the opening of the first branch. Even now, the corporation's public relations department is seeking the Jeruselem queen's permission to use her image in advertising.

As of now, branches are opening all over United Earthlings, the Beltway (http://s6.invisionfree.com/International_Mall/index.php?showtopic=2271&view=findpost&p=1656205) Kahanistan, and other nations, with the amount of CBB branches rapidly snowballing out of control – it is almost like Night of the Lepus. Interestingly, a CBB branch had been opened in Rejistania under an unpronouncable local name. It is not yet know where this is is anyway related to the fact several KaMaRian officials now own real estate in Allanea.

In related news, the Playmate Association of Allanea, the Fursuiter Club of Liberty-City, and the Allanean Furry Association have all sent out a variety of expensive gifts to Queen Mariah to appreciate her brave display of the Bunny Ears. O. K. Coyote, the Chairman of the AFA, has commented today: “This brave display by Queen of Jeruselem may yet bring our community closer to international acceptance. God bless her soul.”

read more

Statement by the Ministry of Economics

As the Tsar is a vehement believer in the True Free Market, and as well as considering the economic oppertunities for growth, The Cute Bunny Burger Corporation of Allanea has been given permission to establish restauraunts in the Divine Prussian Empire of Derscon, as long as they are in accordance with all local laws and customs where the establishments are built, and do not in any way violate the anti-monopoly laws currently in place.

Alyanov Grennavich
Minister of Economics
The Divine Prussian Empire of Derscon

As we speak, the new fast-food store chain – Cute Bunny Burger – is sweeping Allanea. Already, 2,500 branches were open in the United States alone, and more are to come. Several branches were opened in Jeruselem, catering to the wide variety of pilgrims that frequent that nation – with Queen Mariah herself present at the opening of the first branch. Even now, the corporation's public relations department is seeking the Jeruselem queen's permission to use her image in advertising.


FROM: Secretary for the Queen Mariah I of Jeruselem, Victoria Becks
TO: Head of Cute Bunny Burger Corporation PR

RE: Use of image

Due to some weird local laws, you cannot use the image of a head of Jeruselem as for commercial purposes officially. Her majesty is amused by the request, but will not change this law.

However, it is permitted to use a cartoon or Anime character in likeness of her majesty as long as it is not an exact image of her highness. You are permitted to create cute little cartoon character called "Penny the Bunny Girl" with bunny ears and pink dress as your leading image for Cute Bunny Burger Corporation for example. No nudity or obselete imagery is allowed, but a cute little bunny suite is fine.


In related news, the Playmate Association of Allanea, the Fursuiter Club of Liberty-City, and the Allanean Furry Association have all sent out a variety of expensive gifts to Queen Mariah to appreciate her brave display of the Bunny Ears. O. K. Coyote, the Chairman of the AFA, has commented today: “This brave display by Queen of Jeruselem may yet bring our community closer to international acceptance. God bless her soul.”


FROM: Secretary for the Queen Mariah I of Jeruselem, Victoria Becks
TO: CEO of Playmate Association of Allanea

Her majesty thanks the associations for the gifts even though she does not really expect or need them. As an "honourary" Playboy Bunny who hasn't officially appeared in the magazine per se, she happy to further association's goals in showing Playmate's contributions to the world for better or worse.

...

FROM: Secretary for the Queen Mariah I of Jeruselem, Victoria Becks
TO: CEO of Fursuiter Club of Liberty-City

Her majesty thanks the club for the gifts even though she does not really expect or need them. While not a big fan of furries, if it is brings further understanding of the furries to the world and people who don't understand your members - she is happy to acknowledge her accidental contribution to your members. The act with her Playboy bunny ears opening a store called "Cute Bunny Burgers" was intentional

...

FROM: Secretary for the Queen Mariah I of Jeruselem, Victoria Becks
TO: Allanean Furry Association

Her majesty thanks the Association for the gifts even though she does not really expect or need them. While not a big fan of furries, if it is brings further understanding of the furries to the world and people who don't understand your members - she is happy to acknowledge her accidental contribution to your members. The act with her Playboy bunny ears opening a store called "Cute Bunny Burgers" was intentional

OCC: If i have 16 stores, how much would i most likely make (profit) each Year???

Department of Commerce of the Republic of Kanami

Dear CBC,

We are very intrested in setting up a chain of your stores in our nation. The business and relations of this Corperation shall not be interfred upon except in The following:

Unsafe, Tainted Meat

Participating in the Drug/Alchol Exportation, Importation, Funding of Tobbaco Companies

Gross Explotation of Labor

Monoploization violation anti-trust

Defemating any religion, or establishement therof


We hope you understand these are not meant to restrict you but to maintain law and order, and our politcal idelas. Your burger chain is welcome in our nation and hope it will be well recived by the community. Profits will be split, and you will get 80% of all prophets. Please do note, that if the resteraunt is "adult oriented" while you will be allowed, restirctions will be placed on promotion, and access. The Health Department will personally inspect all resteruants, and meat. Along with the EPA, and the FDA. Any notices of failures will made note to your executives.

Sincerly,

Jason Izen, Minister of the Interior

Official Press Release of Cute Bunny Burger Corporation

Friends and shareholders, we would like to thank you all for your generous contribution to the growth of Cute Bunny Burger Corporation. As of now, we have hit an all time high of 7,500 branches in Allanea alone. In Jeruselem, after the new of the Queen’s approval of our restaurant network, over 800 branches are scheduled for opening. Our eventual goal there – and in everywhere else – is to provide fast, reliable, and quality food service in every major city, in every small town, in every college campus.

As of now, only 200 branches of Cute Bunny Burger Corporation had been opened in the kingdom of Derscon, but this is surely only the beginning. Anywhere where the Greater Prussian banner may wave, there will be Cute Bunny Burgers – this is our solemn promise, to our shareholders, to our customers, to our employees. We will honor that promise.

In Kanami, a subsidiary branch known as Cute Bunny Burger Kanami has been opened for compliance with local laws and regulations. It is expected to grow to 100 branches by the end of this year, and this, ladies and gents, is just the beginning.

In other news, the CBBC is starting an art competition in Jeruselem, for the creation of our new logo – Mary, the Bunny Girl. The best artwork will be awarded with tuition of $100,000 at the Jeruselemian college of the author’s choice. This will be proof to the world of the good intentions of CBBC and our dedication to the arts.

Imperial Minister for Health, Human Services, and Purification Keira O'Connor, and Imperial Minister for Agriculture Joseph Banks have given their approval to a measure by the Imperial ArchChancellor Nicholas d'Arquis to allow the CuteBunnyBurger Restaurant to operate in the Shadow Empire under the name of CuteBunnyBurger at 45 prenominated sites across the planet, with further franches opening on the bicentennial plan. At a recent press-conference, Treasurer Alysanndra Ellestrea, two-term Governor of the province of Olien and former swimsuit model, refused to be drawn on the question of whether or not she would be appearing in a bunny-outfit to open it.

When Lord-Emperor Cassander Lucius Drakharn, Defender of the People's Liberties, was questioned on the topic of him wearing a bunny outfit, he threw our reporter through a window and into the moat.

having considered the various issues involved the Empire of Kirisubo will allow initially 5 franchises in Edo our capitial as a trial exercise.

The CBBC should bear in mind that a lot of our citizens are buddist so suitable vegetarian choices are made available.

Regarding local meats we do pork, chicken, lamb and mutton. beef is a rareity since we value cows for their milk rather than their meat.

Soya, bean curd or Tofu is our usual meat substitute.

our enviromental health inspectors are quite strict about food safty standards.

Princess Genjiko of the Imperial family is agreeable to opening up the first one but its doubtful that she'll be wearing bunny ears

Official Announcement of the Cute Bunny Burger Corporation

As of now, we are happy to report that the amount of Cute Bunny Burger branches is continuing to grow, expanding to Psychotic Psychos (with 300 branches scheduled to open), Kirisubo (5 branches scheduled to open), and Roania (45 branches scheduled to open).

Further, the Cute Bunny Burger Corporation is happy to notify its customers, employees, and shareholders, that negotiations are already en route to open a variety of CBB branches in the Galt's Gulch (http://s4.invisionfree.com/Galts_Gulch/index.php?showtopic=823) region.

Truly, soon we will able to say: "The sun never sets on the Golden Bunny."

the first Kirisuban Cute Bunny Burgers has been opened in Edo city centre.

Her Imperial Majesty Princess Genjiko cut the ribbon and was the first customer ordering a chicken burger, small fries and a large coke.

As expected they had a very busy first days trading with customers generally satisfied with the range of fast food.

Local press report that Princess Genjiko did not wear bunny ears for the opening and was wearing a pink flowery kimono for the ceremony.

It was morning in KaMaRi kali, the biggest city in Rejistania. An old place, which's basement formerly housed a corporation which moved, was renovated. Below the restaurant, a small local ISP had its offices and servers and a book-publishing company, specializing in love stories by foreign authors was above it (since Rejistania is a land of public transport and no one would admit in public to read stories like this, companies like this keep on growing). According to local traditions an inikresaist priest made a short ceremony to keep the ghosts and negative simu from attacking this place.

However the market did not really like the products sold. Or the prices since small chains with much less administrative overhead were able to be more efficient and more meet customer preferences. While internationally orange-lemonade for example is most favorite, in 'the Rejis' all sorts of exotic flavors are common.

One of the big reasons that CBBC created a whole host of subsidiary corporations was exactly because this was the method to reduce administrative overhead. Most policy was determined locally, and very soon, the menu and make-up of the BunnyBurger store began towards the Rejistani fashion. On the wall, a 42-inch LCD television was fixed, broadcasting soccer matches day and night, and five game consoles were also brought in, where visitors could try out the newest foreign computer games while biting down on the newest Bunny Meal.

But it went beyond that. Three computers were installed – to be used for a modest price - , and from now on, the place was known as BunnyNet.

Rainley Protestant Talkshow Host: TH
Queen Mariah: QM

TH: Good morning to Rainley Protestant News Network, this is Robert Covak. Today, we have Bunny Girl in our studio
QM: * Giggles * Thanks for the intro, I'm really a Cat Girl.
TH: Really?
QM: Oh yes, no mice in my place. Cats everywhere.
TH: Protestants are asking why you cause such a stir with those Playboy Bunny ears
QM: Well, if you open a restaruant called Cute Bunny Burgers - someone has look like the bunny rabbit.
TH: Protestants are glad you didn't wear the Bunny suite
QM: The Catholic Church wouldn't allow me to do that. The ears were a different matter
TH: Now, CBBC are hold an art competition for Mary the Bunny Girl. Mary was your mothers name right?
QM: She was Queen Mary, but there are millions of Mary out there. I'm Mariah which is Latin American for Mary. I prefer to be called Penny.
TH: Penny is Penelope and that isn't terribly Hebrew, you are half Hebrew
QM: Well, my first cat was Penny.
TH: No one has followed your lead
QM: Well, I am an attention whore, but everyone knows that.
TH: Anyone you know entering this CBBC art competition
QM: Some of my Hebrew artist relatives are working on it right now, but I suspect I might be the model for the Bunny Girl.
TH: Some may call this competition plain offensive and others say it's just Unchristian
QM: Those are the same people who don't complain about logos with violent imagery, yet a female bunny offends them.
TH: How many relatives do you have
QM: Lost count
TH: Your family does breed like rabbits
QM: Well, that's how it survived for 2000 years so far
TH: Good point. Do you like carrots?
QM: Not particularly. I prefer my vegetables green.

Official Shareholder Briefing from the Cute Bunny Burger Corporation

Dear friends!

From its founding, the Cute Bunny Burger Corporation has grown exponentially, now reaching a new level of success with branches in many different nations. Below, we list the different nations and the number of branches so far opened:

Allanea – 10,000 branches
Jeruselem – 1,000 branches
Derscon – 1,000 branches
Psychotic Psychos – 1,000 branches
Super American VX man – 700 branches.
Callisdrun – 500 branches
Kahanistan – 500 branches
Kirisubo – 300 branches
Demotivated Dilberts – 100 branches
The Beltway – 100 branches
Roania – 45 branches
San Haven – 16 branches
Rejistania – 5 branches

Total- 15,266 branches.

As you see, we are now proud to have customers in all sorts of different nations all over the world, but we promise you – we will continue to grow.

May the sun never set on the Golden Bunny.

From the Grand Duchy of Van Luxemburg

We would be interested in allowing you to build some 5,000 establishments around Van Luxemburg, which will be prospective for both. But, we will have to place some restrictions:

-No bunny meat, as it is forbidden by VL law except in very expensive restaurants in very limited portions.
-All ingredients should be clearly stated on packages or menus. This has to do with Van Luxemburg's various religions, which forbids some amount of meat. We ask you to accept that.
-Cute Bunny Burger Corporation should rather be indicated as "CBC", to avoid massive protests by animal-loving corporations and people. No way the full name may be shown.

We hope these proposals sound good to you. We would be welcoming any contact.

Official Response of the CBBC

We will happily comply with these request – actual bunny meat is rarely served in most of our branches in fact – most of the portions are regular meat, except in places where bunny meat is popular. We always make sure to leave at least one bunny meat item available were legal, but we understand that your law does not allow that. However, we would like to register the CBC name and mark as a trademark. Can the golden bunny head remain as the logo of the corporation’s Van Luxemburg branches?

That would be no problem for us. The copyrighting has been sent to the Vun Lëtzebuerger bureau für Kopiereecht. They have confirmed the Copyright, so you would be able to freely use the logo.

From the Supreme Chancellor's Office

It has been decided that the Cute Bunny Burger Corporation is permitted to open restraunts around The Last Anarchy Order. There are, as usual, a few requests that be made.

1. The name to be shortened to CBBC to not mislead lovers of bunny meat, which is very rare in these parts. The logo can be kept.
2. The food be prepared on the spot and not just reheated. Ingredients and nutrition facts must be posted in the restraunt in an obvious place.
3. Workers must be allowed to work regardless of gender, race, sexual orientation, or other biases.
4. There must be more than 400 branches opened in a matter of a two years.

Thank you for your time and consideration of this application.

Official Response of the Cute Burger Corporation

We will gladly open these branches in the Last Anarchy Order, however we ask that instead of changing the name of the corporation, we would be allowed to build 16 rabbit/bunny farms in your nation, and thus gratify the lovers of bunny meat in the Last Anarchy order. We will happily comply with your other requests. As of now, we have plans for opening 1,000 branches within five years throughout the Last Anarchy Order, if this is acceptable.

OOC: I’m looking at the stats for McD and Burger King, who have 30,000 and 15,000 branches, respectively, contending with a world population of 6 billion. I think it’s reasonable for me to have 1,000 branches in a population of 800 million.

From The Last Anarchy Order

We gladly accept your modified offer. Thanks for cooperating.

Official Announcement of the Cute Bunny Burger Corporation

Dear friends!

Despite all difficulties, despite critics, despire regulators - the Cute Bunny corporation still grows. We have negotiated and gotten franchises and branches established in different nations of this beautiful multiverse of ours, and we are now increasing our reach even to the stars.

Allanea – 10,000 branches
Van Luxemburg - 5,000 branches (in process of construction and estalbishment)
Jeruselem – 1,000 branches
Derscon – 1,000 branches
Psychotic Psychos – 1,000 branches
Last Anarchy Order - 1,000 branches (five-year goal, permits granted)
Super American VX man – 700 branches.
Callisdrun – 500 branches
Kahanistan – 500 branches
Kirisubo – 300 branches
Demotivated Dilberts – 100 branches
The Beltway – 100 branches
The C'tan - 24 branches.
Roania – 45 branches
San Haven – 16 branches
Rejistania – 5 branches


Total- 21,280 branches, including branches licensed/contracted but not fully built. We would like also to point out we reached an agreement under which Pink Bunny Cola (http://ns.goobergunch.net/wiki/index.php/Pink_Bunny_Cola) will be served in our restaurants in those nations where it is legal.

As you see, we are now proud to have customers in all sorts of different nations all over the world, but we promise you – we will continue to grow.

May the sun never set on the Golden Bunny.

Message to the Cute Bunny Burger Corporation

My franchise operations company is seeking to open ten of your establishments in Pacitalia, with one in each of the ten major cities in prime city-centre locations. Modern space, clean, new buildings and excellent foot traffic. However, national regulations forbid the sale of rabbit meat at fast food restaurants, and so, we ask that should you accept our offer to franchise that the Pacitalian restaurants be named something different, in order to avoid misleading the public. Perhaps this could be the start of a new subsidiary chain.


Sincera in domina bene,

Roberto Cansobali Serra
Vice President for Franchising
Vita Holdings Corporation

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v207/JC_Denton/NationStates/4255c001.jpg

A tall, relaxed man strode casually through a lively urban street, levelling a broad smile as he paused and began to speak.

"Filling in for Sandra Rehnquist while she is on maternity leave, I'm David Arakawa, reporting live from the Entertainment District of our nation's capitol, Viconia. As any tourist will tell you, Vicona's Entertainment District has many great place for someone to catch a quick bite to eat, but amoung most of the people we've spoken to today, the only restaurant that seems to be on thier minds is newcomer Cute Bunny Burger. Since the corporation's DC business operating license was granted earlier this week, Cute Bunny Burger seems to have become the new fast food favourite here in the capitol and all over the nation."

Footage obivously shot from earlier in the day replaced the friendly reporter, begining with a pair of teenage girls.

"Like, we totally love Cute Bunny Burger," said one, her hair dyed an unnatural shade of electric blue.

"There's less grease then at Skyburger and McDonalds," explained the other teen, a metallic nose ring shining in the daylight.

"And grease is, like, totally nasty," continued her blue haired friend. "I read in Vogue that it, like, is bad for your skin. CBC's got better deals, too. Down here in the ED, everyone tries to rip you off 'cause of all the tourists, but, like, CBC doesn't. They keep it real, you know?"

The view cut away, replacing the girls with a young man in a cheap looking business suit.

"Well, ah, the combos are pretty nice," he began. "The burgers are nice and big, and they're pretty good. Fries are nicer then most places, too. I work here in the E District, and I don't have alot of time for lunch, so the fact that Cute Bunny Burger's got enough staff to get me in and out with my combo in less then five minutes is a big plus for me."

The view cut away again, this time settling on a man and woman, thier arms intertwined.

"Myself and my wife are on vacation from New Finland," explained the man in slightly accented english. "From where we are from, hamburgers and french fries are not a very popular food. Not what we eat, for ourself."

"But this Cute Bunny Hamburger company, they are very good," said the wife. "I don't like the Mac-Donalds, or the Hamburger King, or the Sky Hamburger, but I like Cute Bunny Hamburger company very much. Very tasty, very good meat."

"The service was very good also," said the husband. "Very friendly to myself and to my wife, even though we do not speak such good english, maybe."

The view cut back to the reporter as he remained smiling, the bustling city street behind him.

"With Cute Bunny Burger gaining marketshare that its competitors could onnly dream of, what does this mean for already troubled domestic fast food establishment Burgers, Fries, Everything Nice? Rumors of a buyout are already circulating, and after this break, financial analyst Gregory Hubb will examine the issue."

Response to Vita Holdings Corporation

Certainly, this is very good for our aims. How about Cute Bunny Corporation, Pacitalia? [CBCP]? We suggest that you retain the distinct bunny-head logo of our corporation, so that to enable us to retain the brand recogniseability of our product.

ANN, Democratic Colonies

“Good morning, and this is Cindy Keyhole, Allanean News Network, bringing you news straight from the heart of the action. It seems to us that Allanean culture is spreading to all sorts of surprising parts of the globe, bringing progress and prosperity where-ver it comes. Today, I am outside a Cute Bunny Burger branch on downtown ED – and as you see already, it is filled withl locals – wall-to-wall.”

“How did this happen? How did Allanean fast-food become a staple of the diet of teenagers all over the world, from Derscon to Rejistania to Sentinel Two, from Liberty-City to Roania? The answer is simple – according to many here, Cute Bunny Burger gives better service, lower prices, and better food then many of the established fast-food companies.”

“What's more – for many – is that popular culture in some countries portrays fast-food in a negative light. While some companies bow to the pressure of documentary film-makers and critics, CBBC portrays an outwardly unapologetic image – while internally working for better food. In fact, they have recently given an award to a person who produced a parody on the famous mockumentary film 'Supersize Me'. This, surprisingly, works not just in Allanea.”

“Back to you, Kayla. This was Cindy Keyhole, from Democratic Colonies.”

KCN News, Sideline Reports
Cute Bunny Buger Opens to a Thwacking

Announcer:
Today Cuty Bunny Buger Opened its first store within the United Duchies. After several months of careful thought, the Cute Bunny Corporation decided to open its first restraunt in Wittelbach due to the high profitablity of its comeditors restraunt chains within that city.

The screen shows a rather nice looking urban fast food store overlooking a block sized park surrounded by fifteen and sixteen story buildings.


Amaus De Gurg, spokesman for the CBC's operations in Port Olympus had this to say. "Cute Bunny is going to give its international and Klatchian rivals a run for their money. And one of the biggest markets for fast food in the Klatch is Wittelbach, a city always on the go. We feel that the people of that city will find our selection of burgers, mutton burgers, and fish sandwiches to be great food at a great price."

The screen changes to De Gurg who is standing in a poorly lit hall someplace. His accent is obviously Dutch. The man gives off the look of a well trained senior executive in a dark three peice suit.

However, Cute Bunny Burger seems to have had a serious set-back upon its grand opening. Cute Bunny Burger's Port Olympus operations decided to help promote their new store by giving out cupons for a free small burger around Fitzhume Square, where the store was located. Futher, the individuals hired for the job were asked to wear bunny costumes. This proved to be a rather bad choice.

A large bunny is shown walking through the park, attempting to hand out pink sheets of paper. Most of the locals appear to be avoiding the man in the bunny suit and giving him a fairly wide berth. There is a scream, and the camera pans to another man in a bunny suit. However this one is being hit about the head with an umbrella by a rather tall old lady screaming something..."Dezian of Hell, get yer blood sucking ways to the underworld where you belong..."

Dame Alice Cooper was later arrested and charged with bodly harm to a human being for beating one of the poor bunny men to an unconcious stoopor. Futher, Cute Bunny Buger itself was fined for, distrubing the peace and attempting to encite violence.

The screen changes first to a young woman in a bunny costume being rolled into an ambulance as the old woman looks on mortified. Then a picture of a man in a grey uniform standing outside of the Cute Bunny Burger Restraunt. "Why anyone would dress up as a Hassan in these parts to try and sell a mutton burger is quite curious. However, after investigating the incident we have decided to fine Cute Bunny Corporation of the Klatch, for each instigator in a Hassan Suit."

Allanean burger chain opens first branches
As Allanean rabbit-themed burgers move in, fish & chip shop purveyors sharpen their disposable knives.

http://www.niagara.co.uk/niagara/niagaraImages/fish-ch.jpg
Will burgers made from rabbit meat be able to compete with the mighty fish & chips?
___________________
From 'The Parliamentarian'
Page 31 - Business

The Allanean multi-national 'Cute Bunny Burger Corporation' has opened its first branches in Praetonia this week, but a spokesman from the Guild of Purveyors of Fish & Chips was on the warpath, fearful that the foreign company could import 'burger culture' which he claims is 'unhealthy and contrary to our rich traditions' as well as eat away at the profit margins of the members of his group.

The Allanean company has enjoyed astounding success in recent years, opening thousands of branches in Allanea as well as other nations. Now, however, it is moving into a fast-food market dominated by Indian takeaways and fish & chips where burger consumption is uncommon and even frowned upon by most of society. The CPI is erring on the side of domestic producers many of whom are also members, and rumours are circulating in the City of a loose alliance forming against the CBBC.

On the markets, however, investors are getting juddery, withshares in Cod Almighty Plc. (the fish & chips chain which owns 1,742 branches across Praetonia and the Commonwealth) losing 1.3% of their value on the [ICI-100] as some elements sold shares. Lloyd Randolph, Managing Director of the Royal Raj Ltd. chain of Indian takeaways is not worried, however, telling The Parliamentarian with a smile that '[RR Inc.] welcomes friendly competition but I think the Allaneans will come off worse for their troubles.'

It remains to be seen if the Allaneans will be able to translate their astonishing rise across the rest of the world into success in Praetonia, a culture which unlike many nations has no real history of consuming burgers with a branding scheme that has been branded 'bizarre' by one high-minded columnist, especially against the might of the fish & chip industry.

The State of Amestria,
Northwestern Amestria,
The Estate of the Honorable Duke de Villepin (Vignerot),
The Estate’s Garden

“Burgers…? Ah Minister Laffont, you mean fast food, that North American perversion.”

“Yes Minister de Villepin.”

The Honorable Dominique de Villepin, Duke of Vignerot (a Northwestern Estate), Minister of Foreign Affairs and Member of Parliament sat at his garden table reading the Le Journal de Saône Nord. Across from him sat the Honorable Marquess Claudine Laffont, Minister of Culture, and Jules Dupuit, Minister of the Economy, who unlike his two companions was not a noble, rather a member of the Bourgeoisie. The three officials were taking advantage of the recent break of warm weather to enjoy a nice out door meal. The relaxed late lunch consisted of an appetizer of Escargots and a main course of Rabbit Stew (made from a rabbit snared on de Villepin’s estate), Tripes à la mode de Nord Rivage*, and Nord Rivage Quiche**, all served with Red Wine.

“So Minister Laffont, this global conglomerate with the gratingly pedestrian name…what was it again?”

“Cute Bunny Burger Inc., Minister.”

“Ah yes, this Cute Bunny Burger Inc. wants to open up branches in Amestria...?”

“Yes, and we are going to deny their request, just as we have all other international fast food conglomerates,” replied Ms Laffont. “They are incompatible with Amestrian Culture.”

“And unhealthy, exploitive, and environmentally damaging,” added Dupuit. “Even though foreign fast food francises would be utterly unable to compete against Amestria’s cafés and traditional cuisine at the center, many of the more provincial area’s would experience a loss of local diversity due to predatory competition.”

“Would you care for some more wine Minister Dupuit?” asked de Villepin.

“No thanks, I have a public meeting in an hour with a local small business association... Trying to drum up support for the government.”

“I doubt you will make much progress,” interjected the Cultural Minister. “You might succeed in turning one or two heads, but the associations hate the Socialists and Kasumi has pledged reform of the small enterprise labor codes.”

“It is worth a try. My goal will not be to secure the support of the association’s majority; it will be more to prevent a rout.”

Isn’t this Cute Bunny Burger Inc. an Allanean company?” asked the Foreign Minister.

“Yes,” replied Ms Laffont.

“There’s another reason to keep it out, the Foreign Ministry has been engaging in targeted sanctions against Allanea ever since its imperialism and genocide in Antanjyl.”

“Don’t they claim the Antanjylian conflict to be one of their proudest moments?”

“They won the actual war, destroying the perverse old order, no ones saying their military campaign was not well conducted. After the war however, as you all know, they tried to remake Antanjyl in their own image, armed bandits, and conducted a coercive bombing campaign against the country’s new democratic governing institutions. As a result civil war and millions of deaths from the fighting, winter cold, and starvation… The Allanean occupation was an utter disaster. Their President at the time, Klotchovsky, was an idiot and their new President, Atchinson, is no better. I heard that he hears voices and thinks that it is god talking to him, telling him to lead Allanea in liberating the world. ‘God Bless Allanea’ indeed,” as he spoke de Villepin rolled his eyes.

(*OOC: A local variety of Tripe cooked with cider and calvados.)

(**OOC: A pie made primarily of eggs and cream in a pastry crust with chopped meat and cheese added in.)


Les Échos, English Addition
Cute Bunny Burger Inc. Barred from Operating within Amestria
Page 3

In an announcement that came as no surprise the Ministry of Foreign Affairs, the Ministry of Culture, the Ministry of Economy, and the Ministry of Environment all issued Ministerial decrees barring the Allanean fast food conglomerate from opening stores or investing within Amestria’s sovereign territory. The Ministry of Foreign Affairs announced its ban was a targeted sanction to protest the Allanean genocide in Antanjyl. The Ministry of Culture’s ban is a continuation of longstanding policy that foreign fast food franchises are incompatible with Amestrian culture. The Ministry of Economy cited the harm the fast food conglomerate could cause the overall economy by promoting the unhealthy eating of “mass marketed preprocessed saturated fats” and "empty calories" linked to heart disease, cancer, and obesity. The Ministry of Environment cited the environmental damage and increased waste output caused by international fast food conglomerates.

Continued on page 7

The Xirniumite National Gallery of the Fine Arts
Naerath, Holy Xirnium

‘So our Potash imports from the Yallakian Empire for this month stand at slightly less than half a million nutrient tonnes,’ concluded Odette Meredith, Departmental Secretary of the Trade Ministry's Senior Executive, speaking quietly so as not to disturb the various other individuals gathered in the room.

‘Very well, the Eternal Republic’s needs according to our forecasts are being adequately met,’ replied Lord Charles Quinlan, Trade Minister and Parliamentarian of the High Ecclesiarchy, in an equally subdued tone.

The Grand Cardinal walked slowly along the length of the hall, completely absorbed in the artwork which was affixed to the spotlessly clean, cream-coloured walls. The silence of the room was broken only by the loud reverberations of sporadic footsteps on the highly-polished, wooden floors of the art gallery, and by the faintest sound of classical chamber music which flitted out from some unseen source.

‘It’s quite breathtaking,’ noted Ms Meredith as she paused beside the Grand Cardinal to observe a particularly interesting seventeenth century baroque painting.

‘Isn’t it?’ agreed Lord Quinlan, content merely to look quietly at the painting for several minutes.

Entitled The Education of Marie, the work (by renown Flemish artist Pieter Pauwel Rubens) was on temporary loan from the Musée du Louvre, and had already attracted considerable attention from the museum's vast multitude of patrons over the past week.

‘The next item of concern that I wanted to raise was about the rise of CB Burger Corporation, an Allanean multinational,’ explained the civil servant, tearing her eyes away from the masterpiece for the moment.

‘Mass-market fast food franchises…’ reflected the Trade Minister, frowning in distaste. ‘How dreadfully uncivilised.’

‘Nothing more then cheap and showy rubbish, Minister,’ agreed the Departmental Secretary, ‘which is how one could characterise the commercialised Allanean “culture” as a whole.’

‘As I recall, the High Ecclesiarchy has a continuing embargo levied against Allanea over the Antanjyl affair,’ reflected Lord Quinlan.

‘Now isn’t that most fortunate,’ replied Ms Meredith.

The two returned their attention to The Education of Marie.

In Rejistania, the marketing strategy which looked nice in theory turned out to be slightly suboptimal in reality: Due to the fact that matches are shown any time, a certain crowd of people goes there: those who would see a rerun of a H2SR match at 3 am, those who only wear the colors of the team, the fanatics. Unfortunately, this means less normal guests go an eat there and the weirdos either consume booze or lemonade (due to the fact that they are pupils). The computer terminals most of the time stand unnoticed because either the noise level prevents fun to play or the stores are closed (Rejistania hasn't much of a nightlife and I simply assume it'd costs more than can be earned to have the stores open 24/7). For normal people Kejut Ivanhi ivurkeres is yet another sekhikapub, no place to eat something.

Cute Bunny Burger Corporation Headquarters

"Sir, I believe we have problems." The Junior Executive Officer dropped a newspaper on the desk, the headline emblazoned across it bearing the words CBBC employees attacked in Alcona&Hubris! His senior eyed the newspaper with contempt.

"Trouble, James? On the contrary."

The JEO gulped. "What do you mean, Sir? Our employee has been attacked, and…"

"I know. It has been an unfortunate incident, the fault fully of those who had instructed them to wear bunny suits. I already ordered that so-called decision-maker fired. From now on, our employees at Alcona and Hubris will wear the usual blue uniform with the bunny-head badge, and the promotional staff will wear a bunny-tail and ears on their clothing, but not the full bunny suit, as not to generate local anger. Besides, did you see our sales numbers?"

"No, Sir."

"I see. The CFO tells me that after the news of this, and the news of the Xirnium-Amnestrian boycott, local sales are up 1%. We're seen abroad as symbol of the culture of Allanea – and this is beginning to permeate at home, too… think of McDonalds in Old America, if you will. Remember your Ancient History classes?"

"Yes, Sir."

"Which reminds me… I advised Praetonian Branch to take a leaf from the McDonalds book… as you know, McDonalds adopted themselves to local tastes – selling vegetarian food in India, kosher food in Israel, and so forth. The Praetonian staff told me they are working on adding fish and chips to the menu instead of the CowBunnyBurger, and making the actual BunnyBurger a Special Menu item instead of a Main Menu item… surely that'll help them keep afloat."

Official Response by the CBBC Public Relations Branch to the Amestrian government

We are deeply affended by the slanderous claims made by the Amestrian government against the CBBC and the fast-food industry in general. CBBC uses the best-quality meat available in a given nation, and therefore cannot be justly accused of delivering faulty merchandise. Further, the supposed damage done by fast-food is not caused, as you may know, by fat/calories alone, but by an individual's personal lifestyle and diet – some people may need or want to ingest a large amount of calories, fast. That, as any Allanean child would tell you, is a basic individual right.

We also stand fast in our support of the United States Military and it's actions in Antanjyl.

The Wittelbach Daily Times
Sales of Quick Meals Rise 5% Overall, But Sales Mixed

The Wittelbach Trade Association recently published a report on the sales of quick meal providers within the city of Wittelbach. Quick meals are defined as meals which take less than ten minutes to prepare from order to being served to the customer, this includes both diners, wafflehouses, and fast food restraunts.
The survey also ranked the local chain quick meal providers in terms of their overal market share. What was most startling was the growth in fast food restraunts over the past six months with sales of vegi and shrip cake burgers increasing by 20%. It is likely due to the increasing buying power of Vaux from the former state of Terran Sphere, who were nominally all vegitatrians, that has caused this increase. They tend to see eating out in more favorable terms than the upper levels of society, and do not having the spending power to afford more expensive dining options.

Sales Growth
Pita Pit -22%
Fish Market -19%
Mongolian Hut -12%
Loud's Lobster Hut-10%
Wittel Waffels -5%
Green Burger -3%
Mr. Cluck Duck-3%
Happy Paddy Burgers-2%
Milo's Mutton-2%
Silver Streak Steak and Shake - 1.5%
Independent Restraunts (average) 1%
Yetto's Yam Yut -( -1.2%)


*Note Klatchian Kitty Burger and Cute Bunny Burger were not listed due to non-existance within Wittelbach six months ago.

Market Share
Happy Paddy Burgers-16%
Milo's Mutton-15%
Mongolian Hut-14%
Mr. Cluck Duck-7%
Green Burger-6%
Pita Pit-6%
Klatchian Kitty Burger-5%
Loud's Lobster Hut-4%
Fish Market-4%
Wittel Waffels-3.5%
Pita Pit- 3.5%
Silver Streak Steak and Shake-3%
Yetto's Yam Yut-2%
Cute Bunny Burgers-0.01%
Independents (total) 11%

The report has caused some intrest in that a group of local investors have begun the Klatchian Kitty Burger chain of restraunts. In many ways the KKB appears to be a copy cat of CBB. However, they have apparently shifted from using the image of a cute bunny to that of a cute kitty. Like employee's of CBB, Klatchian Kitty Burgers wear fake ears, but not fake tails. Most readers know that a Klatchian Kitty is typically references an explosive device similar to a claymore mine. However, KKB appears to have included this in their buisness plan. First with their "Croc Killer" burger which is a blended beef and mutton burger with very hot spices.

Klatchian Kitty Burger however is presently in a lawsuit with Dremco, manufacuters of the Klaymore Kitty for copyright infringement.

Meanwhile, Cute Bunny Burger sales continue to do poorly, having never really caught on with the general public.

Jeruselem Government News

Bunnies popular with local youth!

No, local Jeruselem youth aren't buying bunny rabbits. A trendy thing to do for local youth is stint as Cute Bunny Burger Corporation employee. The low paying traditional fast food chains are having trouble recruiting as high school students are becoming CBBC employees in their spare time.

Most cite better employment conditions and better food as the main driving force. Local chains have been forced to stock more "locally grown" food to counter the advance of CBBC and ditch lower grade imported food from poor nations.

Farmers are happy with CBBC with their buy-local polices. Some say, CBBC has saved their businesses.

In related news, local costume stockists have run out of bunny ears. This was probably sparked by Queen Mariah's bunny ear appearance and most of the buyers are young men hoping their girlfriends will be good bunnies (mothers).

PETA have attempted to disrupt CBBC operations but local police have been reportedly putting these people into dog cages.

Kyoto times

New Cute Bunny burger branches to open

with the sucess of the Edo branches of the corporation the first branch has opened in Kyoto.

It is rumoured that Crown Princess Fujiko will perform the official opening since her sister opened the first branch in Edo.

in a related matter bunny ear hairbands have become the latest fashion accessory for teenage girls. Manufacturers are saying they can't keep up with demand outstripping the supply of these promotional items.

News in Kahanistan

Despite the high crime in Kahanistan, robberies of Cute Bunny Burger franchises are much rarer than robberies of other establishments, possibly because they are associated with Allanea and, by extension, heavily armed defenders.

Profits are high as other establishments are robbed, some out of existence. In desperation, some rival companies hire security firms and mercenaries to guard them, but the mercenaries, many of them brutish thugs only concerned with paychecks, often scare away customers or the business looks more like a fortress or prison and less like a fast-food restaurant.

[OOC: Friendly bump thing.]


IC:

McKagan Rock Icon Challenges Evil Corporate Bunny

(SRN - Kurora, McKagan) -- McKagan's free market economy is one that welcomes most new business. Foreign businesses have been known to do especially well in the Greater-Triesa area of the nation due to the lower quality of living. However, in the rest of the nation it is harder for foreign corporations to become powerful. With McKagan's imperialist background the sense of national pride is huge. A very cheap "All McKagan!" campaign can put even the best company down.

With all these things weighing CBB down, cheap food still reigns godly in some urban areas. Several dozen open up across the uptown area of Kurora freely.

However... there's something more powerful than economics at work in McKagan.

The Hair-Grunge subculture, forming from a mix of arena rock and Seattle-Sound, is more powerful than any corporation. Duff Tratain, lead singer and songwriter of Critical Disillusion, is an almost godlike leader. Despite his great dislike of popularity and the "rockstar lifestyle" in general, he still states his opinions in most of his interviews.

That said, his opinions are blatantly liberal, atheist, anti-corporation, and anarchist.

In a recent interview with Guns for Society magazine, he eventually got around to talking about life in Kurora after slipping through several claims that he is a heroin addict.

"Dude, I was driving home from the studio like yesterday or something like that and I noticed that I passed like 3 of these new restaurants! It's so fucking crazy! They opened one up across the street from my mansion. It's so out of control once the basic human need for food is only met by rich, money hungry fuckers from all over the world. I'm not a xenophobic redneck, but come on! At what point is it that the corporations will control EVERYTHING? Their food is so gross. Our generation shouldn't stand for the same bullshit our parents did. Take up arms! I'm not just talking about not eating there, but arm yourself and take out your anger on these doors-of-evil! Blow their employee car-lots to hell! Go sniper on the cashiers! Anyone who's stupid enough to eat there, or take their children there, DESERVES to be scared shitless by gun-toating grungers!"

After that interview was aired on several news stations, the amount of people going to these establishments took a dive. A few acts of violence were recorded in Triesa, as the more automobile-based city had larger parking lots to be blown up and set ablaze by armed Tratain fans.

A week after the interview, no employ had been harmed. Just alot of private property lost and alot of people subjected to spending endless nights arguing with McKagan Insurance Agencies.

IZN - Business News

"Fast-food chains in Zarustra gained a new competitor today as the Cute Bunny Burger Corporation of Allanean origin opened the first of what is expected to be several hundred outlets with the Empire."

"The expansion follows CBC Intl's approval by the Foreign Trade Board for entry into the Zarustran domestic market due to its track record for fair consumer and supplier policies in other nations across the world."

"In other business news..."

Channel 69 - Evening News
http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v293/grunt74/bunnyburga.jpg
"Good Evening, I'm Georgie Peterson with your Business Headlines. Allanean fast-food chain Cute Bunny Burger Corporation in Phoenix, Arizona today annopunced that they have reached a deal with the government and Phoenix Dynamix to open one resturant in the downtown food district. A government spokeman said that this would be a 5 year trial but new resturants would have to be approved by the Field Marshall if they pass the 5 year probationary period. In other news this evening, Phoenix Dynamix has released it's..."

Official Announcement of the Cute Bunny Burger Corporation

Dear friends!

Despite all difficulties, despite critics, despire regulators - the Cute Bunny corporation still grows. We have negotiated and gotten franchises and branches established in different nations of this beautiful multiverse of ours, and we are now increasing our reach even to the stars.

Allanea – 10,000 branches
Van Luxemburg - 5,000 branches (in process of construction and estalbishment)
McKagan – 1,000 branches
Jeruselem – 1,000 branches
Derscon – 1,000 branches
Psychotic Psychos – 1,000 branches
Last Anarchy Order - 1,000 branches
Kahanistan – 1,000 branches
Super American VX man – 700 branches.
Zarustra – 500 branches
Callisdrun – 500 branches
Kirisubo – 300 branches
Democratic Colonies: 100 Branches
Demotivated Dilberts – 100 branches
The Beltway – 100 branches
Alcona and Hubris – 100 branches
The C'tan - 24 branches.
Roania – 45 branches
San Haven – 16 branches
Rejistania – 5 branches
The Phoenix Milita – 1 branch

Total- 24,381 branches, including branches licensed/contracted but not fully built.

While we are experiencing small problems with our McKagan branches being the victims of extreme vandalism which cause us no damage but a slight rise in the insurance premiums, we will not increase prices in McKagan in any way. The good will and respect of all customers, everywhere, is the most precious asset Cute Bunny Burger Corporation has, and this asset will not be jeopardized.

However, we are offering a hand of reconciliation to Mr. Tratain. In an unprecedented show of respect, we have contacted his managers to organize a pair of gigantic Hair-Grunge concerts where Mr. Tratain and his band will have a key role, one in McKagan and one in the United States of Allanea. Mr. Tratain will be offered a 75% share of all profits from this endeavor, and CBBC will receive only 25%.

These are the news for our customers and shareholders.

May the sun never set on the Golden Bunny.

However, we are offering a hand of reconciliation to Mr. Tratain. In an unprecedented show of respect, we have contacted his managers to organize a pair of gigantic Hair-Grunge concerts where Mr. Tratain and his band will have a key role, one in McKagan and one in the United States of Allanea. Mr. Tratain will be offered a 75% share of all profits from this endeavor, and CBBC will receive only 25%.

[Public Response from Duff Tratain]

Do you think you can buy me off like that, Mr. Bunnyman? You idiot! No fucking hair grunge band that knows what it represents will play a show just to make some fucking corporation more money! The only way to offer any real form of "reconciliation" to me or my generation is the wholesale reduction in your operations! It makes my life alot easier for you to just role over like a cheap bitch and die! If you don't, I WILL destroy your evil followers and ports in McKagan! Get this straight, WE DON'T WANT YOU HERE! The exploding cars outside your establishments should sort of send you the message! Go fuck yourself, Mr. Bunnyman! Everyone in this world doesn't believe that a paycheck can fix everything.

I call on anyone who sees that corporations are destroying the basic HUMAN way of life to take all actions into your own hands. Burn that motherfucking bunny! All of them! No, I'm not a redneck that likes "huntin' wabbits." We can't stand for this! No CBBC outlet center can be allowed to remain on McKagan shores! It's ok to fight them anyway you know how. Kill their customers if you have to! Beating the shit out of a businessman who's too cheap and lazy to care for himself shouldn't be too hard. Don't let these fuckers rot our minds and the minds of our children. KILL THEM ALL!

-

After the public message from Duff Tratain went public it moved through circles like heroin. In Triesa, a massive campaign to burn down establishments goes underway. A common tactic is for a "squad" of hair grungers to surround the parking lot of the building while a few go inside the the restrooms. In the restrooms the people light fires in anything they can find and then escape. After they flee, various members outside toss burning molotov cochtails onto the roof of the building.

Law enforcement in Triesa, where the majority of the stores are, is a very hard thing to do. Drug-based wars are always common and the TCPD no longer has free police units to track down multiple attackers.

Also in Triesa, and the rest of the nation, the stores find a very hard time NOT being full of bullet holes. Random people perform drive-by's with a variety of different weapons - sometimes even targeting employees.

In Kurora, the heart of Hair Grunge Culture, business grinds to a stop with very little violence. Most of the establishments get roughly half-a-dozen people every twelve hours, making the profit go away very quickly. The only way for the businesses to survive will be, as Tratain ordered, consolidate and hope for the best.

The corporate team of CBBC has decided that they would meet Duff Tratain at his own game. The speech was recorded, and shown to CBBC customers in Allanea. Thousands of Allaneans watched the speech on ANN – paid for by CBBC funds at two thousand dollars for every thirty seconds, as if it was a commercial for the corporation – and for many Allaneans, it was that indeed. Most Allaneans were brought up on completely different values than McKaganians, in fact disgusted by the anti-consumerist, anti-capitalist attitudes that Tratain was trying to promote. In fact, by the time they heard the last of it, quite a few people in Allanea were angry – not angry enough to start shooting, of course. But angry enough to change their dining preferences from the college cafeteria to a Bunny franchise on the morning after. On the first day after the broadcast, the sales of the Corporation in Allanea rose by 1.5%.

In McKagan

"Maybe I don't have a gun permit yet" – bitched the shift manager – "But do these people think it'll stop me from having a gun? Gods no!" – he drew the Glock-19C, and emptied it towards the man who just fired at his franchise.

The Allaneans have made a choice that only Allaneans could have made. They instructed all employees who could do so to apply for firearm licenses and buy weapons, and the company gave out gift certificates for purchasing cheap, reliable defensive weapons. Where this was not available, the Cute Bunny Burger corporation paid for private security – protecting not only CBBC establishments but anything the grungers would attack – including rival shops. If anybody wanted to chip in and pay for this, they would be welcome, but CBBC was ready to slim their profit margin – or even to run the McKagan branches at a loss.

They knew that maintaining the branches would lead to increased customer goodwill and better sales in Allanea, potentially growing their customer base even the if the 'damn grunger hippie scum' – as one of the board members said in a private meeting – would physically exterminate every CBBC employee in the country. Right now – as the shift manager pondered, looking at the bullet-peppered car as it drove away – it seemed far from likely.

The rejistanian market leading fast food chain Kamsam Inkatil JSK saw this attack on its market share with not too much worry. Allaneans are as subtle as a falling piano and as versatile as a brick wall in their attempts. However somewhen CEO Teke Inkatil had an idea, which after some strategic planning was considered doable: entering the Allanean market.

The daughter company Inkatil Burgers Ltd was founded in Allanea (mostly for tax reasons) and stores of the healthy fast food were opened in different cities in Allanea. In the Hash and Ngmweni, the menus were in Hashi, Mweni and Esperanto as well as in English and included regional healthy food. The following advertising was used in TV stations.

A beautiful, thin, tall, black woman (rejistanian top model Syku I Teke) is in her canvas chair on the shore of an incredibly beautiful beach (which is located near Na~ovi kali), she is nude and sunbathing with her eyes closed. An obese white person, clad in swimming trunks, walks towards her and says "Hi", apparently he is very nervous at doing so. She opens her eyes and says: "Get lost, fatty!"
The screen turns black and the text "Inkatil Burgers - Fast food, not fat food!" appears and is spoken by Syku I Teke (with a slight rejistani accent).

Dear CBBC Inc. Directors,

The Holy Empire of Rhominia would be honored to host Cute Bunny Burger franchises. Specifically, we would prefer a large concentration in and around the cities of Zurich, Bern, Berlin, and Aachen. There are no real religious or ethnic constraints on what meats people can eat, however, beef seems to be the meat of preference int the Holy Empire.

Sincerely,
Karl Rudolphus,
Imperial Minister for Commerce

http://www.geocities.com/life_wyze/logo2.jpg

CBBC Representative,

LifeWyze BioTech would like to suggest a business proposition. Currently LifeWyze BioTech operates four hundred and twelve (412) MediCare Centers within the country of Cruxium with the intent to open further hospitals within the boarders of other countries. It could be mutually beneficial for CBBC to occupy a position within each MediCare building to provide LifeWyze patients and visitors with food whilst at the Center.

Should this proposition be of interest, we can arrange the establishment of a CBBC in each of the existing LifeWyze BioTech MediCare Centers.

Faithfully,
Sir James Irvine,
C.E.O. LifeWyze BioTech.

-snip-

CBBC operations in McKagan were persistant - but for what? At the point where a fast food restaurant has to hire security guards to protect itself people realize that getting a cheap burger isn't worth dying for. People going to the stores stop completely over almost all of McKagan.

After about a week of the last Tratain address, operating in McKagan will be COSTING the CBBC cash and returning absolutely nothing. Futhermore, the corporation will have to spend MORE money to even MAN the stores because most McKaganites don't want to be shot at while going to a low paying service industry job.

The most strong reminder that the CBBC wasn't welcome in McKagan came late one night in Triesa. The night was suddenly shattered around most CBBC outlets in the city when Kriegzimmer designed DNR-13 Anti-Tank weapons began to slam into bunny stores from rooftop attack positions. Avalt Systems Inc. had lost track of a shipment earlier in the week. Now the authorities knew where it was.

The question remains - will the CBBC rebuild its Triesa positions?

Official Announcement of the Cute Bunny Burger Corporation

Dear friends!

First, with some bad news. Due to three CBBC employees being killed in McKagan by what can be only described by unforgivable acts of fanaticism. We decided to scale down the operations in McKagan 10%, out of concern for the lives of the employees. However, the Triesa Complex will not be closed, but rebuilt as a four-story, luxurious, Cute Bunny Emporium, the first of it's kind in McKagan, and plans will be made to convert several other offices into such Emporii.

However, considering newest contracts in Rhominia, Derscon, and with the LifeWize, Inc. company, we have experienced a continued net growth in the total amount of branches. In Allanea, unfortunately, our numbers remain unchanged despire population growth, due to vigorous competition from foreign companies. We are soon planning to launch a new commercial and advertisement campaign based on new our new corporate image.

Status Report

Allanea – 10,000 branches
Van Luxemburg - 5,000 branches
Derscon – 1,500 branches
Jeruselem – 1,000 branches
Psychotic Psychos – 1,000 branches
Last Anarchy Order - 1,000 branches
Kahanistan – 1,000 branches
McKagan – 900 branches
Super American VX man – 700 branches.
Zarustra – 500 branches
Callisdrun – 500 branches
LifeWyze BioTech MediCare Facilities – 412 branches under construction
Kirisubo – 300 branches
Rhominia – 200 branches
Democratic Colonies: 100 Branches
Demotivated Dilberts – 100 branches
The Beltway – 100 branches
Alcona and Hubris – 100 branches
The C'tan - 24 branches.
Roania – 45 branches
San Haven – 16 branches
Rejistania – 5 branches
The Phoenix Milita – 1 branch

Total- 25,393 branches, including branches licensed/contracted but not fully built.

May the sun never set on the Golden Bunny.

* * * *
Official Message to LifeWyze Biotech

Thank you for your proposal, we gladly accept it. However, we would like to have another deal with you – can you issue a recommendation to use our product on health grounds, perhaps have some of your staff pose for our commercials?

Sincerely yours, CBBC.

Letter of Grant to Cute Bunny Burger Corporation, Alllanea

Due to the popularity of the CBBC within Derscon, permission has been granted to CBBC to branch off from just the Mainland Derscon into her colonies in Althar, Haven, and Nova Prussia.

Also, Knyaz Xavier, the Tsarevich, has expressed his wish to invest a substantial amount into CBBC for the purposes of stock ownership. He requests that an approximate price be sent back, as well as a percentage amount of how much stock he would be allowed to buy.

--Ministry of Finance, Derscon

-snip-

[Public Message from Duff Tratain]

Our generation has made the biggest statement in the history of anarchism in McKagan! The Bunny has been set back greatly due to constant attack from grunge warriors. Our job is not yet done, though. With 900 branches still left, the evil bunny fuckers still have a stronghold! I thank all the faithful grungers who have engaged this menance and continue to do so.

-

The McKagan government had been quiet during this whole ordeal. However, McKagan citizens had gotten hurt. There was a problem though. They couldn't just tell CBBC to leave. McKagan is a free market society and they didn't want to turn away possible GOOD international investments.

However, they could make things too difficult for the CBBC to operate.

Several years ago an addition to a McKagan gun law had started through the Senate and then stopped at nearly 85% completed. These laws prohibited foreigners working on a temporary visa in McKagan from owning or operating firearms. This not only would make the workers at these outlets have to give up their weapons, but also all the security forces put in place would be powerless.

After Duff Tratain learned of that, he started a massive campaign to get that bill the rest of the way through. After only a week - he suceeded.

-

[Open Message]

To: Cute Bunny Burger Corporation
From: McKagan Imperial Economic Department (MIED)
Subject: Law Changes

As you may or may not have already heard, the McKagan Imperial Senate just passed new legislation prohibiting all foreign personnel from owning or operating firearms inside McKagan or its provinces. This includes both corporate entities, security agencies, or the personnel thereof. We fully understand that you have been having serious issues with certain members of our Hair Grunge Subculture in attacking your stores and have thus taken a great economic loss because of the issues. You still have a right to operate here until you choose not to, however. Because of this, Krieta Security Incorporated, a McKagan security industry-based organization, has offered to assist you in future securing of your locales.

Futhermore, there are more issues. Community Sponsor Groups have complained about noise and other obvious issues from having constant gunfights around your outlets. Nearly 300 stores, including all in the Greater Kurora district and most others outside the Triesa Corporate District, are included in the report. While we cannot force you to shut down these locations based on these complaints alone, we will have to raise the taxes on the leases to the lots your positions are located on by roughly 100% in order to offset the amount of complaints. Whether or not you wish to follow through with these changes is your choice.

Finally, please know that we are commited to keeping your corporation active in our country. However, the people of our nation do as they wish. We cannot control their wrath.

[OOC: Allanea - I suggest we start the new thread now.]

CBBC Representative,

LifeWyze BioTech will strive to its utmost to discover benefits to the ingestion of your products. Statements will be issued as soon as possible and members of our Public Relations Division are available for your advertisements. Our agreements should prove most beneficial.

In closing, LifeWyze BioTech wishes to know if it would be possible for CBBC to use its' influence in Allanea & Van Luxembourg to suggest allowing LifeWyze BioTech to erect MediCare Facilities within their boarders, each including a CBBC branch.

Faithfully,
Sir James Irvine,
C.E.O. LifeWyze BioTech.

CBBC Representative,

LifeWyze BioTech have agreed a deal with the nation of Polockistan to build twenty MediCare facilities incorporting CBBC outlets. It is our hope that you are agreeable with this arrangement.

Faithfully,
Sir James Irvine,
C.E.O. LifeWyze BioTech.

Representatives of the owners of McDonaldses, Burger Kings, Wendy'ses, and Taco Bells in Najaster, the capital of Kahanistan, meet up in a clandestine get-together in a disused bomb shelter.

The McDonalds representative, who is bitterly opposed to bio-chemical weapons to boot, enters into a long-winded rant about the evils of CBBC partnering with LifeWyze. The Burger King representative complains about the fact that business has dropped 90% since Cute Bunny Burger Corporation took up residence in Kahanistan. The Wendy's representative is opposed to violence, but is shouted down by the other three. The Taco Bell representative is a devout Christian, opposed to LifeWyze's support of the Cruxian ban on religion.

After twelve hours of discussions, a Caterpillar D9 bulldozer with machine-gunners inside attacks a CBBC establishment near Najaster International Airport. On the western edge of the city, masked gunmen wearing turbans and carrying AK-47's and RPG-2's kill 41 customers and wound over 100, while losing six of their own in a shooting rampage.

Most anti-CBBC activity, however, is far less violent. Over 100,000 Kahanistanians protest CBBC's partnership with LifeWyze outside the CBBC's Kahanistanian headquarters. Throughout Kahanistan, more than 600,000 citizens protest against the violence used by the indigenous restaurant owners, though they believe it to be the work of political terrorists or random maniacs.

Encoded Communication

CBBC Representative,

LifeWyze BioTech has learned of the recent atrocity and demonstrations within the nation of Kahanistan. It is the suggestion of LifeWyze BioTech to allow us to deal with the various people who are undertaking these actions. Additionally, LifeWyze would suggest the inclusion of T-2V within all foods and drinks available at your Kahanistan outlets. If you agree to this, kindly send us a reply as promptly as possible and a shipment of T-2V will be sent to a location of your choosing.

Additionally, LifeWyze would like to announce that it has made deals to open fifty MediCare facilities in the nation of Rhominia and one in Tomba-Bill.

Yours Faithfully,
Sir James Irvine,
C.E.O. LifeWyze BioTech.

Official Classified Response to Lifewyze Biotech

Unfortunately we do not think it's a good idea.

CBBC Representative,

LifeWyze will honour the wishes of CBBC.

An update on our MediCare facilities, one thousand five hundred more shall be erected within the vast country of Maraque with a possible further one thousand five hundred erected in ten years time. CBBC outlets are being constructed within each one and every MediCare facility should be completed within six years time.

Furthermore, LifeWyze has unveiled its' plans for the new EduCare Facility that provides training for future doctors, nurses, surgeons & pharmacists. It is proposed that CBBC have outlets within these facilities to feed our future medical practioners.

Yours Faithfully,
Sir James Irvine,
C.E.O. LifeWyze BioTech.

-LAN-
Gloria: I am Gloria.
Tom: And I am Tom, tonights story.
Gloria: After the recent uproar over an afternoon Cartoon show, another thing of Allanea has caused must trouble throughout the world.
Tom: In the Light of the recent McKagan Riots, the Government has decided to Deny any future Business with CBBC, they state that, while intially they had no problem wiht allowing CBBC to open some chains within the nation, there is a large group of McKagan Rock fans within the nation, therefore they refuse.

Message from the Corporate Council of Gyrobot

As the collective of corporations united in our own personal branch of government, we will like to invite you to our corporate council to our nation. We will ensure that any potential opposition will receive a nice redeemer missile up their kissers. Also we will include weapon supplies offered by several arament groups to protect your investments. In exchange we will like to be able to open up branches at your nation. For opening Ceremonies would you prefer if our Prime Minister's wife be opening the branches in a playboy bunny suit?

Aegethia is interested in your proposal for such an establishment, if this means benefit for our country and people. Aegethia would also like to know how this can be acheived, as it is a rather economically-frail country, as a sacrifice for the spiritual well-being of its citizens.

Official Release from the Cute Bunny Burger Corporation

Even as the last gunshots are heard from McKagan – and we are forced to shut down almost four hundred branches there, and to evacuate 800 employees into the United States of Allanea – the Cute Bunny enterprise continues to grow. We have now received full compiled status reports from Juumanistra, where our noble executives have established two thousand five hundred new facilities. Growth is also experienced in Derscon and Jeruselem, as well as slight growth in Allanea itself.

In other news, the Cute Bunny Burger Corporation has scheduled for tomorrow the opening of the 30,000th CBBC Franchise, in Gyrobot. The Prime Minister of the country has been spotted at the opening, wearing the famous Bunny Suit.

Further, negotiations are under way to open new branches in Aegethia.

Status Report

Allanea – 10,240 branches
Van Luxemburg - 5,000 branches
Juumanistra 2,500
Derscon – 1,750 branches
Jeruselem – 1,500 branches
Psychotic Psychos – 1,000 branches
Last Anarchy Order - 1,000 branches
Kahanistan – 1,000 branches
McKagan – 540 branches
Super American VX man – 700 branches.
Zarustra – 500 branches
Callisdrun – 500 branches
LifeWyze BioTech MediCare Facilities – 1932
Kirisubo – 300 branches
Rhominia – 200 branches
Democratic Colonies: 100 Branches
Demotivated Dilberts – 100 branches
The Beltway – 100 branches
Alcona and Hubris – 100 branches
The C'tan - 24 branches.
Roania – 45 branches
San Haven – 16 branches
Rejistania – 5 branches
The Phoenix Milita – 1 branch
Gyrobot – 1 branch

Total- 30,000 branches, including branches licensed/contracted but not fully built.

* * * *

These commercials air in Allanea, Rejistania, McKagan, Kahanistan and Juumanistra

1

*A young, sexy, scantily clad woman with a rifle appears on the screen. Her bra and panties are colored like Allanea's flag*

Hello. I'm Danaida Blue, World Champion in Women's 3-position Rifle. I went to the Ylompic Games, and I brought home the gold. – she turns around and drops to the sitting position, showing off her healthy, graceful body as it moves, then aims and fires her rifle five times. We all see a close up of the target being pierced. And you know what makes me healthy and strong enough to win the Ylompics and make my nation proud? Why, only the fact I eat Bunny Burgers! – the same lady is shown at a CBBC franchise, smiling at the clerk as she bites down on a Bunny Royale.

Cute Bunny Burgers – For Real Champions

2

*a different young woman, entirely naked, appears on the screen, carrying a shotgun*

Hello, I'm Kayla Jacobs, World Champion in Women's Trap. I am the pride and joy of my mother, and of my Uncle Ted, too – hi Uncle Ted! – she waves playfully to the audience Anyway, you probably want to know – how do I stay healthy, beautiful, and fit all at the same time – why, there's only one reason – she wings at the clay, and we see it disintegrate in mid-air. - Only because of Cute Bunny Burgers.

Cute Bunny Burgers – For Real Champions

3

*a muscular, well-built youg man is seen, holding a large pistol, the pistol painted in the colors of the Allanean flag*

Hello, I'm Geralt Gingrich, World Champion in 50-meter pistol. I won my medal – and made my nation proud. As you see, I also have not just an aim – but also a body I can be proud of. If you want to have a body you can be proud of – he fires the pistol at the target a few times Then, eat Cute Bunny Burgers.

Cute Bunny Burgers – For Real Champions

[Open Message from Duff Tratain]

I'm just a small, blond, semi-anorexic McKagan boy who's trying to live life without having everything around me be taken over by the two greatest evils of this world. What do I speak of? Rednecks and Corporations. For those of you who are counting - you can also throw any hybrid blends of the two in there, too.

Critical Disillusion has been all over the world on our last tour - and i've personally traveled alone a few times too. Almost everywhere I go I see crops of rednecks. The biggest thing I hate is this mold that people tend to be expected to fit. Women are supposed to be slutty and fuck everything in sight and men are supposed to be uber macho and shoot things. May the god I don't believe in CURSE a man being sensitive!

These latest CBBC commercials symbolize everything holding our world back from being a truely peaceful place with lots of love an happiness. What scares me most is that citizens of various nations all over the world are supporting this type of redneck arrogance.

The most joyess thing I can see is that the CBBC is FAILING in McKagan. It's a true sign of hope that McKagan's population isn't as dumb as most other citizens in the world. While their naked apathy allows their minds and the minds of their children to be bought and sold at an auction block - McKagan's citizens remain strong and free to express their opinion.

It is both a sad day, and a happy day.

Signed,
Duff Tratain

P.S.: Congratulations to the Kahanistani's who took out their rage on the Great Bunny Menance earlier this morning. If you ever need anything contact my manager.
-

The Secular Empire of Maraque would like to inquire about opening several thousand branches in our nation.

Several days later, an old-style VHS tape arrives in Duff Tratain's home. Casual inspection shows it to be a simple, non-dangerous device. If it's inserted into a player, the face of the CBBC CEO appears, talking to Duff.

Hey there dude! – the man says So I heard your speech – you think you are winning, huh? Weird dude. Did you know that just as you were saying it, I was signing a deal to extend our network into Maraque, opening five thousand branches there? Let me get it into your thick, useless, hippie skull - that's five times more branches then there were in your useless nation before you started your campaign against us. Got that?

Now listen up, you hippie fool. The Gold Bunny is strong, and it'll remain strong – because the people behind it are strong, tough people, not like the hippie losers who listen to your fucked-up, feces-stained shit parody of any kind of decent music. You could call us rednecks and we wouldn't mind – we pack guns whose very existence makes scummy communist hippie c*cksuckers like you cry in their sleep, we drive cars so big they would flatten your shit hippie Swatchmobile like the golfcart it is, and we us Kasahela tanks when we need to take a drive downtown. And you know what? I listen to Toby Keith, too, because he kicks ass and you suck it.

And one more thing, you scummy loser – you will never win against corporations, rednecks, and Allanean capitalism – because Allanean capitalism, corporations, and redncecks are the coolest things in the world. Goodbye, sucker!

Then, the tape's hidden electronics cause it to fry itself, and the player it's in. Nothing remains from which the vdieo can be reconstructed, but a copy of the CBBC's status report is attached with the VHS.

Status Report

Allanea – 10,240 branches
Van Luxemburg - 5,000 branches
Maraque - 5,000 branches [under construction]
Juumanistra 2,500
Derscon – 1,750 branches
Jeruselem – 1,500 branches
Psychotic Psychos – 1,000 branches
Last Anarchy Order - 1,000 branches
Kahanistan – 1,000 branches
McKagan – 540 branches
Super American VX man – 700 branches.
Zarustra – 500 branches
Callisdrun – 500 branches
LifeWyze BioTech MediCare Facilities – 1932
Kirisubo – 300 branches
Rhominia – 200 branches
Democratic Colonies: 100 Branches
Demotivated Dilberts – 100 branches
The Beltway – 100 branches
Alcona and Hubris – 100 branches
The C'tan - 24 branches.
Roania – 45 branches
San Haven – 16 branches
Rejistania – 5 branches
The Phoenix Milita – 1 branch

Gyrobot – 1 branch


Total- 35,000 branches, including branches licensed/contracted but not fully built.

OOC: All insults are IC only, not directed in any way at the McKagan player or any other OOC person

Somewhere in the United States of Allanea

“This Tratain fellow is annoying me. Is there anything we can do?”

“Actually, we can literally do anything, Sir.”

“What do you mean?”

“The profits from the new Maraque market are enough to hire a thousand of private investigators, Sir.”

“Well... do just that. Hire 250 Allanean investigators – pay them a decent sum, send each one of them secretly. Also hire 750 McKaganian ones – and don't tell them about each other. Hint – don't promise - a million dollar reward – to whoever provides proven information about criminal or illegitimate activities of his. He surely can't bribe off all 1,000 investigators, and we'll earn more if we can remove him. Also, the promise of the award will be good enough make bribing them harder, or at least more expensive.”

“Yes, Sir.”

“Now go do it.”

[Closed Message]

To: CBBC Bunny Bitch
From: Duff Tratain

You just don't understand, do you? The chemicals you put in your meat must have fucked with your mind (if you even actually eat that shit) My goal isn't the complete destruction of the CBBC. It's getting the CBBC out of McKagan.

I also find it funny that you try to insult music just because you don't see it as "decent" and it doesn't fit your own fucked up sense of conformity. Ok, Cleetus, get back to huntin' dat' 'possum and listening to Toby Keith. I don't CARE if you don't like my music. My music represents a level of thinking that you ignorant rednecks will never reach. Go on: Fit your own self imposed conformities and molds of ignorance. You'll never understand what life is really about. All you care about is money. While you're ripping off the children, someone's fucking your wife. You just don't understand that some things are more important than you.

Signed,
Duff Tratain

P.S.: Attached to this email is a bill for the price of my VCR/DVD Combo that you just blew up, you dumb fuck!

Breaking news

The nation of Gyrobot had a jubilant celebration as the entire congress of gyrobot came down to the first CBB branch opening for lunch and for an appetiser, Momono, the sexy...err...beautiful wife of our leader, greeting our congress in a playboy bunny suit worn at his 4th bachelor party. Our leader's words when he was ordering: "I want mine supersized, hey why is everyone giving me da funny face?"

In other news

Gyrobot's corporate council has begun welcoming CBBC to the corporate council it now has a place in political power of gyrobot in certain affairs such as defense, security and publicity.

Cute Bunny Burger Corporation ran by fools: SRN Economy Analyst States

SRN (Kurora) - As the ongoing battle between Duff Tratain and the CBBC heats up, one must ask themselves - WHAT IS THE LEADERSHIP OF THE CBBC THINKING. McKagan has turned into a bottomless pit for the Golden Bunny. Insurance costs are climbing several percent a DAY and the only place that franchise stores are able to operate is the gun-toating streets of Triesa (where everyone is used to gunfire anyway.)

Why would the CBBC remain in McKagan? They have been, without any question, defeated by Duff Tratain. How? We don't exactly understand. The fact is that the CBBC is doing no one any favors by keeping their targets in McKagan. The biggest question that no one in McKagan has bothered to ask is one that is pretty blunt. WHAT KIND OF PERSON SIGNS UP TO WORK FOR CBBC! Their employees are being shipped to McKagan where they are being BRUTALLY GUNNED DOWN. How long can this last before it hurts the Empires recruitment?

[END]

Now that the CBBC can no longer use forces native to Allanea to defend its employees in McKagan - the grunger militias take advantage of the lack of "real security." Not to say that Krieta Security Incorporated, the new branch that moved in to help secure the franchises, can't do its job. The fact is that the KSI is being secretly ordered NOT to by Duff Tratains majority stock hold.

New attacks are undertaken, too. An ever-increasing amount of sniper fire is detected in the Triesa suburbs. At some times it is so strong that the employees (which are still in the country for no good reason) cannot step outside for hours past their leave-time.

[OOC: Allanea - I'll let you post on the exact number of casulties.]

CBBC's partnership with LifeWyze has no effect on CBBC's legal right to conduct business in Kahanistan, even if proposed sanctions against Cruxium for its human rights abuses take effect. This is due to terms of an alliance between Kahanistan and Allanea which prohibit Kahanistan from banning Allanean firms from its territory. The protestors are motivated by several different causes, among them the idea of buying from a business that is partnered with a WMD company, especially one known to support Cruxium's ban on religion, support for the rival businesses, or in some cases, pure xenophobia.

However, the government of Kahanistan is no longer able to turn a blind eye to the protests, now 150,000 strong. The Supreme Soviet debates imposing economic sanctions against Cruxium, which would bar LifeWyze facilities from operating in Kahanistan. CBBC establishments would be unaffected, as long as the remaining protestors could be dealt with.

The Supreme Soviet's action is expected to forestall involvements by religious factions in the protests, as Kahanistan is expected to make a stand against Cruxium and for freedom of religion.

Commerce Minister Angus McKimble writes to the CEO of Cute Bunny Burger Corporation to request ideas on resolving the controversy within the bounds of Kahanistan's treaty with Allanea and CBBC policies.

In the meanwhile, as seventeen more CBBC employees were burned on McKaganian land, the corporation reduced it’s presence in the nation. 200 more branches were closed as a first step, and the necessity of closing down more, soon, was already on the table – and yet, the Allaneans waited. They knew that the private investigators were already in McKagan, a whole thousand of them, of varied firms and employs, swarming closer and closer to Tratain’s home. With this kind of thing, someone would find something.

But in the meanwhile, the Corporation’s net profit grew – even despite the payouts to the families of the dead and injured, even despite the closing branches. 500 branches were now franchised in Gyrobot, and the corporation continued to grow, despite it all. And in Kahanistan, CBBC was preparing a massive act of publicity, unprecedented in the corporation’s history. Following uo on the famous LEVI charity that provided food and gifts to IDF soldiers way before Kahanistan was founded, CBBC began to deliver full Bunny Meals to Kahanistani soldiers, both in Kahanistan – and in Yazmarea, where conflict still shimmered on.

Status Report

Allanea – 10,240 branches
Van Luxemburg - 5,000 branches
Juumanistra 2,500
Derscon – 1,750 branches
Jeruselem – 1,500 branches
Psychotic Psychos – 1,000 branches
Last Anarchy Order - 1,000 branches
Kahanistan – 1,000 branches
McKagan – 340 branches
Super American VX man – 700 branches.
Zarustra – 500 branches
Callisdrun – 500 branches
LifeWyze BioTech MediCare Facilities – 1932
Kirisubo – 300 branches
Rhominia – 200 branches
Democratic Colonies: 100 Branches
Demotivated Dilberts – 100 branches
The Beltway – 100 branches
Alcona and Hubris – 100 branches
The C'tan - 24 branches.
Roania – 45 branches
San Haven – 16 branches
Rejistania – 5 branches
The Phoenix Milita – 1 branch
Gyrobot – 501 branches

Total- 30,300 branches, including branches licensed/contracted but not fully built.

To: CBBC Marketing Division
From: Imperial Zarustran Ministry for Foreign Affairs
cc: Imperial Zarustran Ministry for Defence (Supply Procurement Office)

To whom it may concern,

In light of the popularity of CBBC food within Zarustra due to its comparative good quality and taste in comparison to other Fast Food restaraunts, the Ministry for Defence Supply Procurement Office has proposed a situation whereby the CBB Corporation would be awarded a contract to supply food to the Imperial Zarustran Armed Forces. This would be contracted for both cafeteria situations, and (if possible) MRE packs for our Armed Forces - should the CBB Corporation be able to supply meals in MRE form.

We need hardly express to you the potential profitability of this venture, and hope that you will be interested in the deal. We also hope that this venture will improve the morale of the Armed Forces where MREs and general food served to the military is of a better quality than the current supply.

Official CBBC Response

We will gladly agree to this deal, however it would be preferable if you notified us of the amount of cafeteria to be set up, and of other such matters. We will begin the production and installation of all necessary facilities once we receive the relevant information. Sincerely yours,

The Cute Bunny Corporation

With so many people snooping around Tratain's house, he eventually got word that some of his security people were thinking it looked suspicous.

"What would they be trying to do?," one security guard started.

A Krieta Security Incorporated analyst stood across from him.

"I don't know. No one could take a shot at Tratain. I don't know how someone thinks they could get a prosecution out of anything they'd find, either. Duff supported terrorism openly many times. The McKagan Government already let him slide on the violence charges. It's hard to tell just what these people are up to."

The feeling now was one of more curiousness than fear. To quench this curiousness, KSI branches out to do small scale discreet questionings of anyone these suspicous PI's talk to. Simply asking what they were asked in the first place will turn out to be a very useful in identifying this possible threat.

McKagan Insurance Agencies to Stop Converage of CBBC

Kurora, McKagan (SRN) -- Today it was reported that Hertsa Group, the company providing insurance converage to the CBBC franchise outlets in McKagan, has sent a letter to the CBBC Headquarters in Allanea that states, very simply, that Hertsa will be discontinuing its coverage of many aspects the CBBC franchises in McKagan are encounting. These aspects include:

Firearms
Arson
Explosives
Explosive Firearms
Vandelism

Now that the CBBC has closed more stores and are having to pay even MORE money to the endless economic hole of McKagan - will it ever learn that it simply isn't wanted in McKagan?

To: CBBC CEO
From: Gyrobot Corporation Council

Our nations is adding you to our collective of corporate which administrate certain affairs in the gyrobot republic. This will ensure that the corporation councils men will be available to assist in the event of terror attacks against your nation. Consider this as an alliance of sorts.

New Resteraunt Opens

Carmina Gadalica: A new resteraunt called "Cute Bunny Burger opens in Kanami today, after being approved by the Department of Commerce, in the Ministry of the Interior. Several have already lined up to see what this international resteraunt has to offer. "I heard it's good food, and I'm a burger man" Thomas Rosen Said. "This could be come one of my favorites."


CUTE BUNNY DECLARED THE FAST FOOD RESTERAUNT IN KANAMI

Carmina Galdalica:

Three weeks after opening and already the new resteraunt has hit it's all time high. Overwhelming critical support, and major prophets have driven it to #1.
Food critic Joe Whilner says "It's great, good tasting food, excellent burgers."
Others have to agree. Espeically the Protein Junkies. "I've never had a burger so good." Ed Warren told to us

"Fun prizes!" Shout the children

"Good food, easy on the go, you won't want to eat it everyday, but great for picnics." Yomi Muzumi told us.


Cute-Bunny Co, Shutting Down?



AP-According to the F.B.I. Cute Bunny Burger co. One of the most popular fast-food resteraunts in Kanami, may be shut down for their conections to LifeWyze Company. LifeWyze is being cited for by the LON security council for their merchnadice and practices.

Minister of the Interor Jason Izen told us: "Cute Bunny was told of the regulations, it must operate. It's a franchise chain, it answers to the Corperate HQ, and if the HQ answers to LifeWyze, how can we turst it?"

No comment yets from Cute Bunny Co



Will the Rod be Spared for Cute Bunny?

Minister of the Interior Jason Izen says he is willing to have the FDA inspect the meat very thorougly, and allow Cute Bunny to operate under the conditions it continues to allow meet inspection, and provides a domestic finance statmenet. (for Kanami only) "It is a good resteraunt I'll admit, but the fact is when it recives endorcements from a company that sells dangerous WMD's, that becomes rather suspicious to us. Espeically after announcing we will investigate you. I'll allow for it to run if the meet is not genetically alterd in such away that the GMO's prove to be harmful."

K-Times Do you belive Cute Bunny is putting GMO's into their foods?

"It's more than likely. GMO's arent what I would call the huge risk factor, they have been used for years in food processing, we're worried about things like Anthrax being in the meat."

Izen says all meat is being re-inspected and Cute Bunny will not remain closed for much longer.

Official Statement

LifeWyze BioTech announces that it has now established 2038 MediCare Facilities incorporating a Cute Bunny Burger Corportation outlet. Furthermore, with 8 EduCare Facilities now open, each with a CBBC outlet, the total number of Cute Bunny Burger Corportation outlets incorporated into LifeWyze BioTech facilities now numbers 2046.

LifeWyze BioTech hopes that this partnership may continue with the success it has enjoyed thus far.

LifeWyze BioTech Spokesman.

Economist guest editorial on the CBBC / LifeWyze / governments et al.

http://forums.jolt.co.uk/showthread.php?p=11019550#post11019550

Official Brief from the cute Bunny Burger Corporation

We would like to congratulate our customers with the completion of yet another great business cycle. While we are continuing the downsizals in McKagan, the CBBC is also generally continuing to grow. In Kanami, our branches are about to reopen as our representatives again stress the value of compliance with all local regulations and laws. If the Kanamians ban GMO's, there are no GMO's, this is as simple as that.

As such, we are now happy to publish statistical numbers about the amount of branches chartered in Kanami. In Gyrobot, due to our corporation's representatives' presence in the chambers of government, we have chartered a thousand additional branches in that nation.

But, friends and investors, it is not all! The Cute Bunny Burger Corporation has now reached faraway Auman. As of now, only 100 branches were started, but with minor subsidies from the Gyrobot government, we believe that we will be able soon to cut prices and sell more franchises. It is specifically interesting that ALL CBBC restaurants in Auman will be operated on the franchise system – owned and staffed by locals - and 10% of our profits after tax will be donated to the Aumanii military.


Status Report

Allanea – 10,300 branches
Van Luxemburg - 5,000 branches
Juumanistra 2,500
Derscon – 1,750 branches
Jeruselem – 1,500 branches
Psychotic Psychos – 1,000 branches
Last Anarchy Order - 1,000 branches
Gyrobot – 1,501 branches
Kahanistan – 1,000 branches
McKagan – 300 branches
Super American VX man – 700 branches.
Kanami – 500 branches
Zarustra – 500 branches
Callisdrun – 500 branches
LifeWyze Facilities – 2032
Kirisubo – 300 branches
Rhominia – 200 branches
Democratic Colonies: 100 Branches
Demotivated Dilberts – 100 branches
Pacitalia – 100 branches
The Beltway – 100 branches
Alcona and Hubris – 100 branches
The C'tan - 24 branches.
Roania – 45 branches
San Haven – 16 branches
Rejistania – 5 branches
The Phoenix Milita – 1 branch

Total- 32,036 branches, including branches licensed/contracted but not fully built.

OOC: the branch numbers are based on the idea McD has 22,000 branches in a population of 6 billion world wide, while the per capita GDP of the planet, so to speak, is far lower then the average 6-billion NS nation. So my numbers per country are very small and very reasonable. Also added branch estimates for Pacitalia.

Message to the CBB Corp.

The Imperial Union of Communistic Govts shall allow the restaurants to be built as long as they adhere to local laws and building codes. And as a token of good will the Imperial Union governement shall donate 1 billion Commies to the charity of you choice.

Sincerely,
Philip Pwelskov
Imperial Premier

Message ended.

Official Status Report from the Cute Bunny Burger Corporation

While the Cute Bunny Corporation is continuing dowsizals in McKagan, and we understand some of the employees and investors are less then optimistic, we have good news – very good news indeed.

We have – as you will discover from reading below – expanded into several new markets, and in fact increased the amount of representation we possess in Van Luxembourg to 6,000 branches. What's more, we have expanded our holdings to two new nations – see in the list below. We believe that this will continue in the same way.

Good luck – and may the sun never set on the Golden Bunny.

Status Report

Allanea – 10,300 branches
Van Luxemburg - 6,000 branches
Juumanistra 2,500
Derscon – 1,750 branches
Jeruselem – 1,500 branches
Psychotic Psychos – 1,000 branches
Last Anarchy Order - 1,000 branches
Gyrobot – 1,501 branches
Kahanistan – 1,000 branches
McKagan – 200 branches
Super American VX man – 700 branches.
Kanami – 500 branches
Zarustra – 500 branches
Callisdrun – 500 branches
LifeWyze Facilities – 2032
Kirisubo – 300 branches
Rhominia – 200 branches
Democratic Colonies: 100 Branches
Demotivated Dilberts – 100 branches
Communistic Governments – 100 branches
Pacitalia – 100 branches
The Beltway – 100 branches
Menelmacar – 100 branches
Alcona and Hubris – 100 branches
Auman – 104 branches
The C'tan - 24 branches.
Roania – 45 branches
San Haven – 16 branches
Rejistania – 5 branches
The Phoenix Milita – 1 branch

Total- 33,140 branches, including branches licensed/contracted but not fully built.

"CBBC digs into Bazalonia" Fortuna Wradd

Cute Bunny Burger Corp(CBBC) has gained approval for it's first store to open in Bazalonia today as the burger giant had submitted a request to local planning authorities in Fauxhan.

A spokesperson from CBBC states "We have been looking at expanding into Bazalonia for quite some time." but when asked to comment further on why. The Spokesperson refused to comment. We have also learned that along with CBBC's standard burgers. They have also developed a few Bazalonian-esclusive Bazalope Burgers.

CBBC hopes that these burgers "make Bazalonians more comfortable coming to a multi-national company, like us." However this has yet to be seen exactly how Bazalonians will react to this store. Peter Hobble, star striker for Bazalonia's national soccer team has announced that he will be opening the first CBBC in Bazalonia.

When asked why he decided to open their store Hobble simply stated "I had tried one while I was away in Pacitalia for a soccer tournament and I love the fact that they are putting Bazalopes on the menu."

ANTHRAX Scare A Hoax


Port Kyohomi-A CBC Resteraunt was shut down and quarntined for hours when an anymonous tip stated the burgers we're spiked with Anthrax purchased from LifeWyze. After examination of all shipments of meat, and the stored meat in the resteraunt proved no traces of Anthrax we're found. No one who had eaten there in the past week had reported any illnesses, and no one has been hospitalized for Anthrax poisining.

"I think the scare just comes with the whole situation between LifeWyze and Cute Bunny, and us." Hazmat Unit Inspector Marshall told us. "People are scared. Because no other nation has so openly condemed anyone for selling chemical weapons on the open market. And what we've seen terrorists do with Anthrax, it's natural people are nervous."

Some local therapists and sociologist told us it's the belife of corperate conspiracy, which is false. But some are sure it is true. Shegure Miyamoto recently published a warning on his website, Anti-Capital.org a site that is Anti-Capitalism.

"LifeWyze has openly supported Cute Bunny. If the Security Council shuts a respected Bioengineering company down, Cute Bunny will fall too. And I bet meat poisnings will be common."

Most however doubt such things. "It's just wacko conspiracist therorists." Says Meat Inspector Dave Thompson. "We check the meat everyday, and I have never seen one spiking. Plus Cute-Bunny is a self sustaning corperation. I doubt they depend on Lifewyze much."

Cute Bunny responded to the possibilites of GMO's in their foods in another article.

"Our representatives again stress the value of compliance with all local regulations and laws. If the Kanamians ban GMO's, there are no GMO's, this is as simple as that."

Minister of the Interor Izen also says the public has nothing to fear.

"Me and Minister Kamiah are making sure every import we get from any nation in the world is safe. Prime Minister Romeny has emphasized that we do ever since she took office. If we don't it will be our heads, in the Suprem Court. We hope Cute Bunny realizes that this was a mere hoax, the Government has not shut down any other chains, all resteraunts are safe."

Official Announcement of the Cute Bunny Burger Corporation

We are happy to please our customers and the populations in which we have Cute Bunny Burger branches – and this means we sometimes serve foods that are only popular in a particular country. One of these countries is Nova Bazalonia, where 500 new franchises have sprung up out of the blue – yes, the Bazalope Burgers are that good. We are also slowly growing our presence in other nations, for example in Auman,

In the meanwhile, Cute Bunny Burger Corporation is among the most-endorsed corporations in the world – already endorsed by several foreign leaders, such as Queen Mariah of Jeruselem and King Alexei of Derscon. CBBC employees are part of the government in Gyrobot, and Roanian high-ranking ministers have attended CBBC branch openings. We in the Corporation believe this is not the end – and we're probably right.

Status Report

Allanea – 10,300 branches
Van Luxemburg – 6,500 branches
Juumanistra 3,000
Derscon – 2,000 branches
Jeruselem – 1,750 branches
Psychotic Psychos – 1,000 branches
Last Anarchy Order - 1,000 branches
Gyrobot – 2,001 branches
Kahanistan – 1,000 branches
McKagan – 200 branches
Super American VX man – 700 branches.
Kanami – 500 branches
Zarustra – 500 branches
Callisdrun – 500 branches
Nova Bazalonia – 500 branches
LifeWyze Facilities – 2032
Kirisubo – 300 branches
Rhominia – 200 branches
Democratic Colonies: 100 Branches
Demotivated Dilberts – 100 branches
Communistic Governments – 100 branches
Pacitalia – 100 branches
The Beltway – 100 branches
Menelmacar – 100 branches
Alcona and Hubris – 100 branches
Auman – 264 branches
The C'tan - 24 branches.
Roania – 45 branches
San Haven – 16 branches
Rejistania – 5 branches
The Phoenix Milita – 1 branch

Total- 35,800 branches, including branches licensed/contracted but not fully built.


OOC: Made some calculations here. Canada, with a GDP of 32,000 dollars per capita, has 352 McD branches per million people. America has 433 McD per million people. Norway has 120 McD's per million people. So, umm... my numbers are really not all that big. I'm going to work on bringing them closer to above, though.

USSNN would like to extend a 350 branch lisence to CBBC. This is only an initial permit, more stores maybe be allowed in the future.

From the English page of the Na~ovi National on a slow news day (the strange English is intended since it's the National):

LifeWyze deliberately spreading misinformation

According to transnational sources, LifeWyze, a corporation based in Cruxium used a highly morally questionable method of corporation: In the LifeWyze Hospitals, Cute Bunny Burger instances exist and are actively promoted. This partly uses misinformation, distortion of truth and lies. Apparently the governments were efficient* enough not to interfere in this. When reporters of the National confronted the Consumer's Rights Association ANJA with this they said that as soon as similar things would happen in Rejistania, legal action would be considered.

*OOC: "efficient" in rejistanian can be a euphemism replacing "corrupt"

The People's Republic of Bilky Asko (PRBA for short) would like to have CBBC as the EXCLUSIVE burger chain in our country. The licence will begin at 15000 branches, and we will like to use 100% rabbit meat in all the meats. (as we have a massive rabbit population in our country, which is nearly as high as the Eider Ducks). We would like these branches to be specially marked. (so foreigners will know)

The branches could also be marked in listings (e.g. [R] or [100%])

These branches will start out in the cities Bilky and Asko. Later we may place some in the county of Bill the Bill Bill Billington McBillBill

The advertising of Inkatil Burgers was simple: "Compare!" and then always one fact was compared between Inkatil (who adopted the rejistanian letter I as logo since it looks like a heartbeat on an cardiogram): the amount of calories between a standard burger, a menue, the amount of Omega-3 or other cryptic values, which are the hype of the day for the health-enthusiasts. They were selected so that Inkatil wins every time. After that (or below that in print media) follow a comic rabbit, which is struck by a lightning, utterly reminding of the rejistanian letter I and the Inkatil logo.

In the name of His Majesty, King John Antonette, King of Cherry Ridge by Divine Right, the government of Cherry Ridge hereby grants the Cute Bunny Burger Corporation an official charter, allowing them to establish a chain of stores within hte Ridgian nation. Furthermore, they must adhere to all laws of the Holy Catholic Monarchy of Cherry Ridge. As fellow Prussian's, we welcome you with open arms.
The Court of His Majesty

We also inform the CBBC that rabbit meat is not popular in Cherry Ridge, and may wish to go with the traditional beef- and buffalo- burgers.
--------
Message from Antonette Royal Merchants, inc.

We are willing to buy stocks in your company. Please inform us when the ARM can purchase stocks.

ooc: ARM is the King's private company.

CBBC will be allowed within the boundries of Hallad, in cities and towns around the nation. We have no limit on the amount of establishments you may open -- you can buy whatever property is available. And, keep in mind other domestic and foreign companies will be competing for those properties as well.

The Commissariat of Commerce
The Halladi Workers Republic

News Item from the McKillops Bridge New Statesman:-

CUNICULAR GENOCIDE SPREADING ACROSS THE WORLD

Alarming reports are reaching Errinundera of a massive upsurge in the extermination of cunicular beings.

“At current rates this destruction will match the ovine, bovine and porcine genocide that we have been witnessing for many years,” says Errinundrian protector of welfare, drabid. “The awful thing is, we can’t allow these poor creatures in as refugees because they would rapidly destroy our environment. Just think of the long-footed potoroos.”

But, what of the cuniculi themselves? Under the supervision of professor lagerismp, seven doctoral students from the McKillops Bridge Polytechnic Department of Animal Linguistics were smuggled in as workers at the notorious Allanean cunicular battery farms. Five are still recovering from post-traumatic stress syndrome; one didn’t recover and will be buried on Saturday; but the seventh, singerp, has recovered sufficiently to speak with us.

“The torture inflicted upon these poor, defenceless creatures is unimaginably horrific,” she says. “They are kept in huge barns without proper sanitation; their legs are clipped so they don’t waste energy by moving; and vast amounts of synthetic hormones and antibiotics are pumped into them to encourage rapid growth. By the time the creatures are ready for consumption there is no longer enough room for them all on the floor. They just start piling up on top of each other. The ones at the bottom suffer terrible injuries.”

“But it gets worse. At production time one wall of the barn becomes a huge shovel and pushes all the creatures into the processor at the other end. First they are doused alive with chemicals to clean all the blood and shit and rotting food from them - I still have nightmares from the screams. Then they are pushed into giant mincers – alive! How could anyone eat these crimeburgers? Thank goodness we live in a civilised, vegetarian nation.”

When contacted the foreign minister, junketo, merely shrugged her shoulders. “We don’t interfere with other nations. The world is hell. Luckily we live in paradise.”

ANN News

Today, following the 'alarming' report by Errirunderan researchers, our reporter has decided to ask the Allanean President what he thinks about it. Our president has been kind enough to say a few words to the Allanean News Network journalist – and even take him on a hunting trip with him! Here's what the President has had to say on the issue.

The camera shifts, showing a red Ruger Ram pickup truck plowing through some dense shrubbery. We are at the current president's private hunting reserve. The President walks out – he is wearing camouflage and a wide-brimmed leather hat.

“Good day, Mr. Nox.” - he smiles at the camera. - “I understand you had questions to me about the food preparation practices of Cute Bunny Burger Corporation. Let me put it this way: I'm the President of Allanea. What private business does in this country is none of my concern.”

The President scans the horzon with his binoculars, then chuckles and opens the shelf in his pickup truck, extracting an M82A2 bull-pup semi-automatic rifle in .50 caliber and aims it at something far away. He fires with a powerful boom, fire erupts from the rifle.

“I understand you had other questions?”

“Yes, Sir, I understand there are concerns about the lrights of animals.”

Close-up on a big buck deer that's being hit in the shoulder with a powerful rifle cartridge. A large gash appear on the deer's body and it is thrown sideways by the sheer power of the shot.

“PWNed! Excuse me, I'll answer that after we get to the deer.”

The truck approaches the deer, the reporter and cameraman riding in the back. As the President disembarks, he shows the reporter and cameraman three large steel cups.

“Want some? I think it's still warm. Anyway, to your question. You asked about animal rights. I'll quote my favorite artist. Animals have only two rights: garlic and pepper. I'll be liberal for a change and add ketchup.”

He fills the cups with fresh deer blood. The last frame is with the President, the cameraman and the reporter drinking together, fresh deer blood trickling down their chins.

“This was Chris Nox, ANN. Back with you, Stella.”

Cute Bunny Burger Corporation Response

We would, if this were not an official corporate report, tell the Errirunderan government and Errirundera's people where they can go and what precisely they can do. As it stands, it's an official corporate report, we'll remain polite. So, without further ado, we'll be to the news that'll probably make every PETAphile's blood boil.

And the news are many, and they are all good – unless you're a PETAphile, of course. We have grown – and we have grown explosively, hitting a new high of 50,000 branches world-wide. Now, Juumanistran representation has more then doubled, and in Kanami, 500 branches have been built. This growth may appear surprising, but we think we're only beginning to approach the market capacity in most countries. In Van Luxemburg we have hit the license ceiling and are unable to operate more stores, so Bunny Fans will have to cram inside. But that's okay, Luxemburgians – soon your most favorite corporation will have bigger and better branches for you!

Good luck to you all, and may the Sun never set on the Golden Bunny.


Status Report

Allanea – 10,300 branches
Juumanistra - 10,000 branches
Van Luxemburg – 7,500 branches
Derscon – 4,000 branches
Jeruselem – 1,950 branches
Psychotic Psychos – 1,000 branches
Last Anarchy Order - 1,000 branches
Gyrobot – 2,001 branches
Kahanistan – 1,000 branches
Cherry Ridge – 1,500 branches
Hallad – 2,000 branches
McKagan – 200 branches
Super American VX man – 700 branches.
Kanami – 1,000 branches
Zarustra – 500 branches
Callisdrun – 500 branches
Nova Bazalonia – 500 branches
LifeWyze Facilities – 2032
Kirisubo – 300 branches
Rhominia – 200 branches
Democratic Colonies: 100 Branches
Demotivated Dilberts – 100 branches
Communistic Governments – 100 branches
Pacitalia – 100 branches
The Beltway – 100 branches
Menelmacar – 100 branches
Alcona and Hubris – 100 branches
Auman – 264 branches
The C'tan - 24 branches.
Roania – 45 branches
San Haven – 16 branches
Rejistania – 5 branches
The Phoenix Milita – 1 branch

Total- 50,000 branches, including branches licensed/contracted but not fully built.

[OOC: Remember you have branches in Praetonia as well.]

OOC: How many do you think is reasonable?

http://www.nationmaster.com/graph-T/foo_mcd_res_percap <- use this as guidance.

Based on the RL figures, I'd say about 40k branches. This is a low proportion compared to RL figures, and Praetonia is way more capitalist than most of those RL nations anyway, so you may want to revise your other figures.

OOC: Tagged because the subscribe function just isn't working for me right now.

Fedala passed its decleration yesterday afternoon that private militias would be finally illegalised for the progression of the War of Golden Succession. This was never truly a problem for the civilian sector, but before Kriegzimmer had been turned over for to a government leaning administration, there was a threat of corporate armed armies working for the richest CEO. However, with recent international opinion working against the Cute Bunny Burger Corporation [CBBC] Fedala suddenly worries that the fact that there are at least 42,000 different branches throughout the Empire and her colonies could mean serious troubles in the years to come. For that reason it was best to stamp out any problems that could arise, before they arised. For that same reason Kriegzimmer had begun to warn the CBBC that should it's equipment be found within the Empire it would face a sudden cut-off from sales. Fedala was very serious. With twenty two million or more dead insofar through the War of Golden Succession, in just three months of war [!], the Empire was no longer going to play games with threats that should have remained nonexistant. The throne was not going to fall apart through internal pressures! With millions of men fighting for worthless ground throughout Sarcanza, Ruska and Weigar Fedor was in no position to divert troops to patrolling the major cities to make sure there was no 'corporate uprising'. That was damn sure.

[OOC: Short post, but meh. I only have so much stamina through the day to post - and I just posted for a modern world.]

Official Cute Bunny Burger Corporation Report

Good days, Bunny lovers! Good days indeed! We have now increased our clientele, with over 80,000 new branches having opened in The Macabees and Praetonia alone. Yes, ladies and gentlemen, we are big, we are big, we are H-U-G-E. Just how huge are we? Well, our stock prices have went up 100% since the new statistics we compiled.

We are now planning a small stock issue, so as to make sure that the corporation is capable to keep up this expansion to other nations. So we suggest you go and buy some CBBC stock – you know you're going to hit it big, when you Buy The Bunny.

And now, without further ado, the actual stats.

May the Sun never set on the Golden Bunny.

Status Report

The Macabees – 42,000 branches
Praetonia – 40,000 branches
Allanea – 15,300 branches
Juumanistra - 20,000 branches
Van Luxemburg – 7,500 branches
Gyrobot – 4,001 branches
Derscon – 4,000 branches
Jeruselem – 2,950 branches
Psychotic Psychos – 1,000 branches
Last Anarchy Order - 1,000 branches
Kahanistan – 1,000 branches
Cherry Ridge – 1,500 branches
Hallad – 2,000 branches
McKagan – 100 branches
Super American VX man – 700 branches.
Kanami – 1,000 branches
Zarustra – 500 branches
Callisdrun – 500 branches
Nova Bazalonia – 500 branches
LifeWyze Facilities – 2032
Kirisubo – 300 branches
Rhominia – 200 branches
Democratic Colonies: 100 Branches
Demotivated Dilberts – 100 branches
Communistic Governments – 100 branches
Pacitalia – 100 branches
The Beltway – 100 branches
Menelmacar – 100 branches
Alcona and Hubris – 100 branches
Auman – 364 branches
The C'tan - 24 branches.
Roania – 45 branches
San Haven – 16 branches
Rejistania – 5 branches
The Phoenix Milita – 1 branch
Total- 150,000 branches, including branches licensed/contracted but not fully built.

OOC: As you see, I'm updating the amount of branches to a RL reasonable number.

The C'tan - 24 branches.

Of course, this comical lying about the scope of the company's operations (hint: I told Boris it was down to one branch last night) had consequences. It became so unfashionable, that no one would tolerate it.

And in lighter news, the owner of the land on which the sole remaining branch of the Pink Bunny Burger Corparation in the Necrontyr Empire sat has evicted them. After the fraudulent reporting of the corparation's operations made it a complete laughing stock, Mister Lumic said "I can no longer conscience allowing this rediculous company to operate on my land. My reputation is damaged by its very existance."

At around 02:00 this morning, Tephet time, the notice was served. The branch was completely demolished, as per the tenancy agreement, at 2:01, and the employees - also on Mister Lumic's property - were ejected to back to their country at 2:03.

Secure Communique to the CEO of Cute Bunny Burger Corporation

Good morning.

As I am deeply interested in your corporate enterprises, and a big fan of your restauraunt chain, in order to help support your business, as well as to say I had a part in helping CBBC spread in Derscon, I would like to aquire approximately five percent of your total stock, and invest the money into your corporation to help you in your quest.

:::Kynaz Xavier Alexeitovich Andropov:::

====================================
Status of the CBBC in Derscon

______________________
Excerpt from the Zeitung Kapitalstrasse


"...and the CBBC has made enormous investments and expansions in Derscon. With an approximate twenty branches for every one million Dersconis, it is the largest Fast Food restaurant in the DPED. However, plans are being made for a mass expansion in Nates World, the Dersconi semiautonomous colony in Haven, to make approximately fifty to one hundred branches per million, and in the Dersconi Dienstaid colonies, seventy-five for every million. However, the Dersconi Althar colonies take the cake (or bunny?) with two hundred and fifty-three branches already in place, and more to come...."

Official Cute Bunny Burger Corporation Report

Hello bunny lovers. So, first for the bad news. We lost our branches in the C'tan to the insanity and xenophonbia of the locals. You will see that the C'tan branches are no longer listed, but in the meanwhile, we have grown elsewhere. As you may note, Czar Alexei of Derscon had bought 5% of our stock, and therefore we have had large – really large – amounts of investment money. We have have used them to increase our presence in a variety of nations, especially Allanea itself and Juumanistra, but also Hallad, Jeruselem, Arizona Nova and the Conglomerate.

As you see, all is good.

May the Sun never set on the Golden Bunny.

Status Report


Derscon –113,824 branches
The Macabees – 42,000 branches
Praetonia – 40,000 branches
Allanea – 25,300 branches
Juumanistra - 30,000 branches
Arizona Nova - 10,000 branches
Van Luxemburg – 7,500 branches
Gyrobot – 4,001 branches
Jeruselem – 3,000 branches
Psychotic Psychos – 1,000 branches
Last Anarchy Order - 1,000 branches
Kahanistan – 1,000 branches
Cherry Ridge – 1,500 branches
Hallad – 3,000 branches
McKagan – 100 branches
Super American VX man – 700 branches.
Kanami – 1,000 branches
Zarustra – 500 branches
Callisdrun – 500 branches
Nova Bazalonia – 500 branches
LifeWyze Facilities – 2032
Kirisubo – 300 branches
Rhominia – 200 branches
Democratic Colonies: 100 Branches
Demotivated Dilberts – 100 branches
Communistic Governments – 100 branches
Pacitalia – 100 branches
The Beltway – 100 branches
Menelmacar – 100 branches
Alcona and Hubris – 100 branches
The Conglomerate - 100 branches
Auman – 364 branches
Roania – 45 branches
San Haven – 16 branches
Rejistania – 5 branches
The Phoenix Milita – 1 branch

Total- 290,150 branches, including branches licensed/contracted but not fully built.

OOC: As you see, I'm updating the amount of branches to a RL reasonable number.

[TAG], and confirmation on above post.

Official Announcement of Cute Bunny Burger* Corporation

The administration of Cute Bunny Burger, Inc. (further referred to as CBC, Inc.) is now pleased to announce the opening of its first branches in the United States of Allanea. We thank our investors for enabling us to start out with 158 branches in 20 different states of Allanea, as well as in several other nations.

The Cute Bunny Burger Corporation also thanks the people of Callisdrun for allowing us to open branches in Callisdrin and Drun, the two biggest cities in that nation. We are proud to serve our burgers to the Callisdrunian workers and students.

Furthermore, as of now, we pledge that every year, at least 1% of our profits would be donated to charities. Further, a CBC fund will be made available, to the sum of at least one million Universal Standard Dollars to send prize-winning children of CBC customers into colleges and universities.

We would be happy to receive recommendations as to where new branches of CBC are to be opened, or market surveys from new places.

*The CBC would like to note that the majority of hamburgers and other food are not made of actual rabbit meat, but rather of beef, pork, or sheep as appropriate locally. Rabbit meat, as well as meat of other animals, is available. Call your local CBC branch for details.

OOC: Basically you post here if you want to have CBC branches in your nation. If your nation is relatively free-market, just post about said branch/es being opened, as CBC would probably expand to any nation it was allowed to expand to.

Our nation will consider this as we are currently planning things out. We are interested at these prospects.

Message to the Cute Bunny Burger Corporation

WTI Food Services ApS, a wholly owned subsidiary of WorldTech Industries, is seeking the rights to open twenty of your establishments in test markets throughout the Grand Archduchy and the Dominions. Our market research has shown that the Hamptonian market can comfortably absorb sixty-five thousand branches.

We would like to run the franchises under a subsidiary, to be jointly owned by WTI Food Services ApS and Cute Bunny Burger Corporation, pending your approval. By pairing with WTI Food Services ApS, you are gaining the resources of the entire spectrum of WorldTech Industries (http://ns.goobergunch.net/wiki/index.php/WorldTech_Industries), Hamptonshire's largest business entity.


We look forward to your response,

David Skaaning
Division Vice President for Franchising
WTI Food Services ApS

You are welcome to be located in Swilatia. There are no "illegal meats" in Swilatia as it is an atheist nation.

DEMOCRATIC SOVIET REPUBLIC OF KAHANISTAN
Ministry of Commerce

Internal Statement to the People of Kahanistan

The Government of Kahanistan has sanctioned Cruxium, and no LifeWyze facilities will be allowed to operate in Kahanistan. To those who were protesting against CBBC because of its partnership with LifeWyze, we hope that this measure will allay concerns that we would do business with such a corporation.

Signed,
Angus McKimble,
Minister of Commerce

As a result, the anti-CBBC protests reduced radically. There were still shooting and grenade attacks by native fast food operators, but they were rare. The CBBC provided jobs to Kahanistanian high school and college students, and were widely viewed as a good thing.

Most realized that trying to shut down a business with gun-toting Allaneans was a risky maneuver. Some of the native competition began recruiting people to work for CBBC... with ulterior motives.

Gyrobot's Colonization board is proposing that CBBC should colonize some of its planets under its influence here are some of them

Cerebus IV
Poseidon III
Lucifer V
Shuubi-ka

We hope that your franchise reaches the galaxies.

Atheistic Right welcomes CBBC into it's country... the government places no restrictions on any dealings the business might have.

OOC: Allanea, it was the Tsar Alexei's son, the Kynaz Xavier, who bought the stock, not the Tsar himself. :)

Official Cute Bunny Burger Corporation Report

The Cute Bunny Burger Corporation wishes to apologize to it's shareholders. In previous informational issues, we stated the Czar of Derscon has purchase 5% of our stock. This is untrue. IT has been his son, Kynaz Xavier, that has conducted those purchases. Other then that, we just have good news. First of all, the Gyrobot government is helping Cute Bunny Burger Corporation establish franchises, farms, and other resources on four planets under it's influence: Cerebus IV, Poseidon III, Lucifer V and Shuubi-ka.

In Kahanistan, the controversy with Cruxium industries has been resolved, and now Allaneans are busy establishing new branches all over that country. Growth also continues in Arisona Nova and Allanea itself, where literally thousands of branches have sprung up. Perhaps more interestingly, a test run of 500 branches has been established in Swilatia, where the CBBC foresees a large demand for the Burger. In Atheistic Right, a similar run has also been built.

My the Sun Never Set on the Golden Bunny.


Status Report



Derscon –113,824 branches
The Macabees – 42,000 branches
Praetonia – 40,000 branches
Allanea – 30,300 branches
Juumanistra - 30,000 branches
Arizona Nova - 20,000 branches
Van Luxemburg – 7,500 branches
Gyrobot – 14,001 branches
Jeruselem – 3,000 branches
Hallad – 3,000 branches
LifeWyze Facilities – 2032
Psychotic Psychos – 1,000 branches
Last Anarchy Order - 1,000 branches
Kahanistan – 1,500 branches
Cherry Ridge – 1,500 branches
Kanami – 1,500 branches
McKagan – 100 branches
Super American VX man – 700 branches.
Zarustra – 500 branches
Callisdrun – 500 branches
Nova Bazalonia – 500 branches
Swilatia – 500 branches
Atheistic Right – 500 branches
Kirisubo – 300 branches
Rhominia – 200 branches
Democratic Colonies: 100 Branches
Demotivated Dilberts – 100 branches
Communistic Governments – 100 branches
Pacitalia – 100 branches
The Beltway – 150 branches
Menelmacar – 100 branches
Alcona and Hubris – 100 branches
The Conglomerate - 100 branches
Auman – 364 branches
Roania – 45 branches
Hamptonshire - 25 branches
San Haven – 16 branches
Rejistania – 5 branches
The Phoenix Milita – 1 branch

Total- 316,725 branches, including branches licensed/contracted but not fully built.

To allow a large Franchise access to the Yukatan Market, the Senate has passed a declaration preserving 100,000 business locations for the CBC to open Restaurants. These Restaurants are to be built all over the Planet Yuk.

We also would like to buy a portion of your stock.

The Yukatan people await your contractors.

The Liverpool England Ministry of Trade and Economic Affairs has received an inquiry from the Football Association of Liverpool England on your company's behalf regarding the possible opening of branches in Liverpool England.

We have received the number discussed, about 18.4 branches per million population - which works out to an astounding 133,000 branches. Per our embargoes on all countries the Government has not officially previously had any contact (any non-diplomatic contact, such as trade fairs, auctions or sporting events do not count), we can only allow up to 14 branches per million people of a new multinational food chain, which in Liverpool England works out to 101,416 branches.

With regards to the meat used for burgers, Liverpool England has a strict agricultural policy regarding imports. All meat must be checked by the Food Safety Board to ensure no harmful diseases, and limits on food (no limits on beef except MCD; no more than 80% of import can be lamb, poultry or mutton; no more than 25% of import can be other meats) apply.

Bunny Burger Detailed Report

We are happy to tell our friends and shareholders that we have received a variety of good news today. Of course, the amount of our Juumanistran branches (and Arizonan branches, and Bazalonian branches, and Gyrobotan branches) has increased yet again, but is that the key thing? Surely not!

The key thing is that we are now expanding our holdings to two wonderful new nations – Yukatania and Liverpool England. In Yukatania, we've been literally given free land to set up franchises on, and we've already started the work, with ten thousand new, ultra-cheap, Cute Bunny Emporia all over their planet Yuk!

In Liverpool England, permission has been granted to open over 100,000 branches, and we'll be beginning with a modest offering of 1,000 CBBC branches. We assure the Liverpoolian authorities that only local-grown meat will be used in all CBBC products.

In other news, CBBC is now the proud sponsor of this year's Four Nations' Invitational, now known as the Cute Bunny Burger Corp. Four Nations Invitational.

Thank you all, friends. And may the sun never set on the Golden Bunny.

Status Report

Derscon –113,824 branches
The Macabees – 42,000 branches
Praetonia – 40,000 branches
Allanea – 30,300 branches
Juumanistra - 40,000 branches
Arizona Nova - 30,000 branches
Bazalonia – 28,500 branches
Gyrobot – 24,001 branches
Yukatania – 10,000 branches
Van Luxemburg – 7,500 branches
Jeruselem – 3,000 branches
Hallad – 3,000 branches
Cherry Ridge – 2,500 branches
LifeWyze Facilities – 2032
Kahanistan – 1,500 branches
Kanami – 1,500 branches
Hamptonshire -1,050 branches
Liverpool England – 1,000 branches
Psychotic Psychos – 1,000 branches
Last Anarchy Order - 1,000 branches
Super American VX man – 700 branches.
McKagan – 100 branches
Zarustra – 500 branches
Callisdrun – 500 branches
Swilatia – 500 branches
Atheistic Right – 500 branches
Kirisubo – 300 branches
Rhominia – 200 branches
Democratic Colonies: 100 Branches
Demotivated Dilberts – 100 branches
Communistic Governments – 100 branches
Pacitalia – 100 branches
The Beltway – 150 branches
Menelmacar – 100 branches
Alcona and Hubris – 100 branches
The Conglomerate - 100 branches
Auman – 364 branches
Roania – 45 branches
San Haven – 16 branches
Rejistania – 5 branches
The Phoenix Milita – 1 branch

Total- 387,750 branches, including branches licensed/contracted but not fully built

Star Office

"Hey, dad, what are the insider trading laws like here?" Xavier chuckled as Tsar Alexei walked over to the computer screen his son was at. "'Cause I just bought all this stock, and I'm your son, and you make the decisions about what goes where." Alexei smirked and patted his son on the shoulder.

"It's fine. As long as I don't tell you anything, it's okay." Xavier pointed to one of the other monitors, listing the properties being allocated to the CBBC in the Dersconi Haven and Greater Dienstead colonies. Alexei shrugged.

"Oops. I don't think the Allaneans will care, considering your investments in CBBC and Allanean Arms. You're a big Allanean investor here, they'll overlook it." Alexei walked out of the office as Xavier continued looking over his major investments -- Allanean Arms, CBBC, Kreigszimmer (Mac), and his uncle's company, Andropov Petroleum and Beyond. All were doing well. Awesome.

====================================
Communique to CBBC

Provisions for twenty-thousand of your chains to be set up in the Dersconi Haven colonies have been set up. You will need to compete with the other land buyers at the moment, but that shouldn't be a problem.

Unfortunately, due to the typically socialist leaning of the Dersconi Haven colonies, it will be a bit difficult for you to get through, but plans are on the way to curb this. They are still subject to the Tsar, after all.

--Alyanov Grennavich
Minister of Finance

Here, at The People's Republic of Bilky Asko have conducted a survey amongst our people and we have drawn up this proposal.

Our country will accept up to 1,000,000 branches in our country. This is of course, a cap limit. This essentially means that you are monopolizing a whole country and you may use as many restaurant spaces as you want. We also plan to fund you if losses occur. (so you have a finacnial cushion)

There is one condition that all meats must be local bunny meat (so any other meat must be bunny). We look forward to the Golden Bunny being in our country!

As this is a personal letter from the King, I would also be glad to promote the company, so sales can be boosted.

Thanks for your time,
- Bilky Asko, King of The People's Republic of Bilky Asko

P.S. This offer may have limited time as other companies may be competing for space.

1500 and counting!

Despite the negative publicity, and minor scares, CBC has now reached 1500 Branches in Kanami, and is expected to continue to grow. Many mall are saying Cute Bunny has brought great business to their stores, especially in the rural places. Among the helping factors, was CBC's labeling 100% REAL BEEF, MEAT, etc. Assuring that the meet is untainted, safe, and authentic. The Government has inspected every meat shipment carefully, and has deemed it safe.

"We get about 15,000 packages a day, and out of thoes we maybe find one or two that have spoiled on the way over here, which isn't uncommon. I must admit I love Cute Bunny, my family does, and I make sure all the meat is good."

Cute Bunny is expected to continue growing.

Cute Bunny Burger Corporation Detailed Report


So, what's next for the Cute Bunny you've all grown to love and appreciate? Well, we're going for increasing the quality of service in the countries we already have. In Kanami, we are now planning for a full transition to local-grown meat, so as to make the meat more healthy. We would like to remind the Kanamian consumers that CBBC burgers are reach in vitamins A and D as well as in proteins and are very good for you, in moderation.

Further, agreement has been reaches with the Bazalonian government that the Cute Bunny Burger Corporation would sponsor their new big Baptism of Fire stadium, in which the next Baptism of Fire matches will be held soon. Surely this will interest the Bazalonians. In the meanwhile, we decided to set up 100 branches in Billy Asko as a test run to explore the market conditions in that country. We have also slightly increased the amount of our branches in Pacitalia. Also, in the Dersconi Haven Colonies, we have established a test run of 5,000 branches, hopefully they will do well.

Thank you all.

May the Sun Never Set on the Golden Bunny.

Status Report

Derscon –113,824 branches
The Macabees – 42,000 branches
Praetonia – 40,000 branches
Allanea – 30,300 branches
Juumanistra - 40,000 branches
Arizona Nova - 30,000 branches
Bazalonia – 28,500 branches
Gyrobot – 30,001 branches
Hamptonshire -11,050 branches
Yukatania – 11,000 branches
Van Luxemburg – 7,500 branches
Dersconi Haven Colonies – 5,000 branches.
Jeruselem – 3,000 branches
Hallad – 3,000 branches
Cherry Ridge – 2,500 branches
LifeWyze Facilities – 2032
Kahanistan – 1,500 branches
Kanami – 1,500 branches
Liverpool England – 7,000 branches
Psychotic Psychos – 1,000 branches
Last Anarchy Order - 1,000 branches
Super American VX man – 700 branches.
McKagan – 100 branches
Zarustra – 500 branches
Callisdrun – 500 branches
Swilatia – 500 branches
Atheistic Right – 550 branches
Kirisubo – 300 branches
Rhominia – 200 branches
Pacitalia – 150 branches
The Beltway – 150 branches
Democratic Colonies: 100 Branches
Demotivated Dilberts – 100 branches
Communistic Governments – 100 branches
Menelmacar – 100 branches
Alcona and Hubris – 100 branches
The Conglomerate - 100 branches
Billy Asko – 100 branches
Auman – 464 branches
Roania – 45 branches
San Haven – 16 branches
Rejistania – 5 branches
The Phoenix Milita – 1 branch

Total- 410,000 branches, including branches licensed/contracted but not fully built

Tel Morlin Dispatch-Moon-Telegram-Update-Sun-Star-Picayune-Times

News Section

Inside: More opinions and reactions to this event

First Foreign Company to make business in Milchama

With a shocking move the Cute Bunny Burger Corp. (CBBC) moved into Milchama as two towns Glenard and Kfar Elyon allowd them in to open two branches of their multinational chain. This move though has sparked controversy in Milchama as many people do not want any foreigners in Milchama and others do not want a capatalist corporation coming in as, "All they will care about is profits. They will try to kill us just to try and make more money, I have read Jennifer Government."

Many people are expected to fight the corporations move there as they have appealed to the leadership of both cities and have urged many to boycott the products of these cities. People within the cities have also been planning boycotts hoping that the lack of proftis will cause the greedy capatalists to move away from Milchama. One of the protesters said, "Capatalits only respond to one things, profits. We're hoping that by boycotting they will not be able to get any profits and thus will be forced to move away from here."

The shops plan to open tommorow and it looks like the next couple of months in Milchama could be rough ones.

Persepolis Gazette

Worldwide Fast Food Conglomerate is Moving into Parthia

The first of the initial 500 branches in Parthia has opened in Persepolis, sitting in the main financial district of the town, people have lined up outside the doors waiting to try the food. Those who tried the food have said amongst other things, that it provides an excellent taste of the West and their cuisine. Others, mostly health critics, say the food they provide is a primary example of the unhealthy nature of many Western people, who are said to eat nothing but this. However, this has not deterred individuals from waiting for hours to try it, and those who do say they will definitley be regular customers.

"Its great for on the go lunches when you don't have time to sit at a restauraunt," says Shahriar Kashani, a Parthian Lawyer for the firm Rostamhid and Golzari. Indeed, the lack of a fast food market in Parthia ensures that this will become a popular chain.

The first 500 restauraunts are to open in Persepolis, Tehran, and Esfahan, with 350, 150, and 100 in each of those towns, before spreading to other towns and cities in Parthia. We can expect the profits will be immense, since they will have a monopoly on the fast food market when compared to the tiny 10 total franchises Mc Donalds owns in Parthia. Plus, many say, this is only the beginning, many more restauraunts will open very soon.

Cute Bunny Burger Corporation Detailed Report

What are the news for the fans and appreciators of the Golden Bunny? First, the company has installed 2 franchises in the famous socialist country of Milchama. The branches are owned by two local kibbutz's, so they are in now way violating the socialist principles of the locals, though some of them still protest against the whole thing on principle. Branches have also been established in the Co-Prosperity Sphere of The Territory, of which we are particularly proud for a host of reasons of our own. Amazingly, Pantocratoria and The Parthians were the newest additions to our clientele

Growth continues in Juumanistra, Arizona Nova, Yukatania Hamptonshire, Jeruselem, Gyrobot. Yukatania and Liverpool England. This is funded by the profits of CBBC, but also by the purchase of 5% of the stock of our corporation by Queen Mariah of Jeruselem. Now, Queen Mariah joins the elite circle of CBBC shareholders, in which Kynaz Xavier of Derscon is already a member.

Thank you for your kind attention, and may the sun never set on the Golden Bunny.

Status Report

Derscon –113,824 branches
The Macabees – 42,000 branches
Praetonia – 40,000 branches
Allanea – 30,300 branches
Juumanistra - 50,000 branches
Arizona Nova - 50,000 branches
Bazalonia – 28,500 branches
Gyrobot – 30,001 branches
Hamptonshire -31,050 branches
Yukatania – 11,000 branches
Van Luxemburg – 7,500 branches
Dersconi Haven Colonies – 5,000 branches.
Jeruselem – 13,000 branches
Hallad – 3,000 branches
Cherry Ridge – 2,500 branches
LifeWyze Facilities – 2032
Kahanistan – 1,500 branches
Kanami – 1,500 branches
Liverpool England – 35,000 branches
Psychotic Psychos – 1,000 branches
Pantocratoria – 1,000 branches
Last Anarchy Order - 1,000 branches
Super American VX man – 700 branches.
McKagan – 100 branches
Auman – 666 branches
The Parthians – 600 branches
Zarustra – 500 branches
Callisdrun – 500 branches
Swilatia – 500 branches
Atheistic Right – 550 branches
Kirisubo – 300 branches
Rhominia – 200 branches
Pacitalia – 150 branches
The Beltway – 150 branches
Democratic Colonies: 100 Branches
Demotivated Dilberts – 100 branches
Communistic Governments – 100 branches
Menelmacar – 100 branches
Alcona and Hubris – 100 branches
The Conglomerate - 100 branches
Pantocratoria – 100 branches
Billy Asko – 100 branches
The Territory – 100
Roania – 45 branches
San Haven – 16 branches
Rejistania – 5 branches
Milchama – 2 branches
The Phoenix Milita – 1 branch

Total- 494,002 branches, including branches licensed/contracted but not fully built

Bunny Burger Hits Bilky Asko - People Petition for more!

CBC has reached Bilky Asko and has been a big hit in the country. People love the fact that rabbit-meat is locally made and has less calories than pork or bone shavings. People are petitioning outside City Hall to get CBC to build more, especially in the west of the country.

People have asked for at least 100 other restaurants. The King and the Government both say that they will. "Think about it..."

Due to the lack of vegetarians in Bilky Asko, CBC have had no problems about petitioners. The government make sure that it is controlled killing so the rabbits will not decline in population. There of have been no complaints about unfair hire at CBC, so people have been raring to work there. The future of CBC seems to be very good indeed.

~ High Flyer Daily (Newspaper - 29 May 2006)

Brendhan Burnelsen looked at the transcript and knew this would be great in CM. Marines loved their meat and liked the idea of eating bunny rabbits. He sent a message opening a nationwide franchise opportunity for interested parties which was quickly scooped up. As of now Buffallo and Bison, Ostrich, conventional beef and pork, rabbits raised and killed in quanity, sportted owls, herring, and gators were all on the menu depending on the local owner's preference and business opportunities. This would turn out nicely, and the mascot would have to be a cute bunny holding a Koloshnikov and a burger. CM, of course, was as sick mentally as a nation could get before it turned into a despot communist country. As of now ten thousand seperate franchisees were scheduled to be built in the civillian sector and at least one on every Capital ship with more for the larger ships (appx 35,000 spaces). Of course, CM having more than an adequate starship capability and CMDC's in ties to the government meant that no matter what this would be quite profitable.

The Legitimate Government of Leafanistan, in the interest of repairing relations with the outside world, wish to let the CBBC open branches with a limit of 250 per city in the Southern regions of Leafanistan. Currently we cannot offer branches in the wartorn North or the Inner regions of Leafanistan. We also welcome branches in the Leafanistani territory of Algeristan Strip with the same limit but this time on the entire territory.

Minister of Foreign Trade

Official Status Report of the Cute Bunny Burger Corporation

Good day, good friends!

So what are the news today? The Corporation grow immensely again, having transcended the psychological limit of 500,000 branches. Is this enough? Surely not enough, but we are going to do better. With branches in Leafanistan, Casari and Crazed Marines, we are now in over forty nations, making the ancient McDonalds look like a bunch aged hippies.

More than that, we're now an official military contractor to the Crazed Marines military, which we consider to be a very good thing, and we hope that you will consider that a good thing, too! We know John Antonette of Cherry Ridge thinks so too, because his company, Royal Merchants, inc, just bought 5% of the Cute Bunny Burger Corporation stock. That's the third Greater Prussian royal family member that has bought CBBC stock. He joins Queen Mariah and Knyaz Xavier in the endeavor. May so bless them God.

We would like to announce that the Cute Bunny Security Forces will also be providing security at the Baptism of Fire events in the nation of Bazalonia. We hope that this will increase our support in the attendant nations.

Thank you all. May the sun never set on the Golden Bunny.

Detailed Status Report

Derscon –113,824 branches
The Macabees – 42,000 branches
Praetonia – 40,000 branches
Allanea – 30,300 branches
Arizona Nova - 60,000 branches
Liverpool England – 45,000 branches
Juumanistra - 40,000 branches
Bazalonia – 28,500 branches
Gyrobot – 30,001 branches
Hamptonshire -41,050 branches
Yukatania – 23,000 branches
Crazed Marines – 10,000 branches
Van Luxemburg – 7,500 branches
Dersconi Haven Colonies – 5,000 branches.
Jeruselem – 23,000 branches
Hallad – 3,000 branches
Cherry Ridge – 2,500 branches
LifeWyze Facilities – 2032
Kahanistan – 1,500 branches
Kanami – 1,500 branches
Psychotic Psychos – 1,000 branches
Pantocratoria – 1,000 branches
Last Anarchy Order - 1,000 branches
Leafanistan – 750 branches
Super American VX man – 700 branches.
McKagan – 100 branches
Auman – 666 branches
The Parthians – 600 branches
Zarustra – 500 branches
Callisdrun – 500 branches
Swilatia – 500 branches
Atheistic Right – 550 branches
Kirisubo – 300 branches
Rhominia – 200 branches
Pacitalia – 150 branches
The Beltway – 150 branches
Democratic Colonies: 100 Branches
Demotivated Dilberts – 100 branches
Communistic Governments – 100 branches
Menelmacar – 100 branches
Casari – 100 branches
Alcona and Hubris – 100 branches
The Conglomerate - 100 branches
Pantocratoria – 100 branches
Billy Asko – 200 branches
The Territory – 100
Roania – 45 branches
San Haven – 16 branches
Rejistania – 5 branches
Milchama – 2 branches
The Phoenix Milita – 1 branch

Total- 564,952 branches, including branches licensed/contracted but not fully built



Secret Transmission to the Loyalists of Leafanistan

We would like to pay you 1 million Universal Standard Dollars to be able to set up CBBC branches in your part of the nation. Hopefully this money will help in your effort.

OOC: Since when are there 150 branches of CBBC in Pacitalia? Try more like 10. Rabbit meat is not a popular menu item. ;)

OOC: Paci, read the FIRST POST in the thread.

Secret Transmission to the Loyalists of Leafanistan

We would like to pay you 1 million Universal Standard Dollars to be able to set up CBBC branches in your part of the nation. Hopefully this money will help in your effort.

Encrypted Reply from the Revolutionary Government of Leafanistan

It seems our brethern in the South are trying to look better. However, we gladly accept your donation, and while this may seem to be a conflict of interest, corporate law isn't exactly in force anymore, we approve your request to open franchises in Northern Leafanistan as well.

[END]

Official Newspaper of the Port Cities Page G19

Today the Cute Bunny Burger Corporation has been given the right to expand. Several private citizens have accepted their offer and the first franchise is opening in South Port City with another 3 planned in the Downtown region and 15 more opening in the next year in North Port City. While this invasion may seem like capitalistic imperialism in disguise, the government assures us that they will keep a close eyes on those opening the franchises.

The Communist Front has declared that it will destroy the foreign invaders. This threat was not taken seriously by the police and it is expected that this is just a knee jerk reaciton and surely the Communist Front will see the value in letting foreign companies invest our proud nation.

Long live the Glorious Confederacy. Long live the Legitimate Government of Leafanistan.

Persepolis Times

The Shah takes interest in CBBC

There was a stir when today, at 12:30 PM, the Shah arrived in his Bugatti Veyron at the Cute Bunny Burger shop in downtown Persepolis. People made way and bowed as the Shah of Parthia personally walked up to the counter of the restauraunt and ordered two double hamburgers with cheese and an order of fries, before sitting down at his table and eating. Deemed nothing but amazing by the buisnessmen who normally eat at the location for a quick lunch during their break hour, the Shah's interest in the franchise has created an upsurge in its popularity, creating massive lines at drive thrus and registers.

Even more interestingly, the Shah has made an offer to purchase a 2.5% stake in the franchise for an undisclosed, but certainly massive sum of money as a personal investment. He said, "I hope that an investment in the chain will spawn a plethora of new locations and the birth of a real fast food chain throughout Parthia."

So far, the franchise has had unsatiable demand as residents call for the expansion of it to serve more areas and more people.

OOC: Paci, read the FIRST POST in the thread.

I'm not really concerned about what you serve, it's how CBBC stores are magically opening here and there.

I'm not really concerned about what you serve, it's how CBBC stores are magically opening here and there.

It is how private citizens are 'magically' buying into the franchise in the hopes they can make money.

OOC: add 35,000 branches to the CM take. Our military added some and our dominated planetary colonies took quite a few. I kinda snuck that into the last post.

It is how private citizens are 'magically' buying into the franchise in the hopes they can make money.


That and my amount of Pacitalian stores had kept stable for a loooong while. 100 is a tiny amount of stores.

And noted, CM. I estimated CM is a lot like the United States in the culture?

[Open Message from Duff Tratain]

The evil redneck bunny menance has been knocked back so far in McKagan that it is hard for me not to declare victory! We still have work to do though. There's 100 stores left, everybody! They're just sitting there to try and keep me from saying I won. My goal has never been the complete destruction of the CBBC. It's been to destroy it IN MCKAGAN. As that date grows near - I feel the need to gloat just a bit. So... erm.... ha. Yeah - the bunny sucks. I'm going to win, you fucking redneck, cousin fucking fuckers!

[END]

With the CBBC all but defeated by the forces of McKagan-Anarchy: there was one last push to be made. One last battle to be waged against the martyr that CBBC had been turned into.

The grunge movement held an unprecedented advantage. With the same amount of attackers and a smaller number of targets - it could only get worse. In the days after the Tratain address the random gunfire got stronger and more constant at the beseiged service industry workers.

Then it happened. In the early hours of the morning several Triesa franchises were attacked with black market-aquired C12 plastic explosive. Looking to outright destroy the remaining buildings - it was only a matter of time until the CBBC would be whiped out.

[Encrypted Message]

To: Cute Bunny Burger Corporation
From: Duff Tratain

Hey dude. It looks like you're having some issues in McKagan. That's really sort of sad. Seeing such a good corporation with such good quality products that sell to such an educated market not be able to operate in McKagan really does make me sad.

Um... I just choked on a piece of rubber.

Listen you stupid fuck. I know you're a stupid redneck, but do you have no compassion for your countrymen that you're killing for absolutely nothing more than your stupid pride! I'm openly giving you a chance to save those pathetic service industry workers that are still within McKagan. You have 24 hours to make an international address stating that anarchy and hair grunge music have defeated your corporation. When 24 hours are up I will release this time stamped video to CSHR News. It'll play all around the world and prove you to be a fraud who cares about nothing more than self-pride. The pathetic service industry workers who are about to DIE because of your pride - along with their friends and family MAY not like that very much!

Make up your mind - bitch.

[END]

Official News Channel 16

Onto foreign affairs, in McKagan the Cute Bunny Burger Corporation has met a backlash from Duff Tratain, music industry icon. He has declared a de facto war on CBBC and the government is powerless to defend this corporation. What kind of weak country is McKagan that it is completely unable to stop a few music enthusiasts who are a bit loose in the head from bombing a few resturants.

Our conclusion down here at the station is that CBBC will be expelled from McKagan all at the fault of the government who is too weak and poor to even police its own nation. Why should McKagan be interfering in our restructuring of the states of this confederacy when it can't even control a few kids with hygiene problems and speakers up too loud. If you ask me, this is a clear sign McKagan will soon be destroyed as it tears itself apart.

[END]

And noted, CM. I estimated CM is a lot like the United States in the culture?
OOC: Well seeing as how I come from Alabama, US and CM is a USA-breakoff I'd 'spect so.

And CM is an extreme version of the USA's right-wing political spectrum.

IC:
Profits were through the roof. Because of the varity of foods and cleanliness ordered by the management the franchise was taking over the fast-food market in CM. Over the past year profits of over 6 billion were reported in the mainland of Crazed Marines alone. More and more people were asking for CBC but CMDC kept cool by regulating the expansion slowly at the rate of five a month. CMDC stock from this was up by twenty points. All was well.

Message to Allanea

We would like to set up one CBBC branch in Lame Bums. This will be in the city of Ausfva, on the western coast, and this will be for testing purposes. If indicators show promise, we will consider allowing more branches.


[OOC: Let's see if this can go somewhere...]

Otagia and Pale Rider Arms respectfully request that these franchises be made available to Otagian and Rider citizens. After all, competition is the lifeblood of any successful corporation.

Yours,
Daniel Quetzal
CEO of Pale Rider Arms

OOC: Pantocratoria doesn't have 1000 branches. There are an indeterminate number of branches in Pantocratoria until I replace this post with one specifying how many branches there are.

OOC: Urgh. Something weird happened with Pantocratoria's branches. I have them listed twice, once with 1,000 branches and once with 100 branches. The latter was supposed to be the actual numbers. Replased with [unknown] pending review.

Official Cute Bunny Burger Corporation

We must interrupt our line of generally beneficial announcement with the solemn report of the murder of 35 Cute Bunny Burger Corporation employees by Tratain-directed terrorist activities. We have cut the amount of branches in McKagan to fifty branches, and paid out the requisite amounts to the families of the victims. The President of the United States has commended on the death of CBBC employees, vowing that, quote, they will never be forgotten, and their foul hippy communist murderers will never be forgiven.

The international expansion of our corporation continues. With massive profits raked in nations like the Parthians and Crazed Marines, continued public subsidies in Gyrobot, expansion continues at it's pace, bringing new branches of the CBBC to Lame Bums and Otagia. Unfortunately, it seems that market capacity has been reached in Arizona Nova, and no new branches will be built there in the foreseeable future.

In the meanwhile, it seems now the fashion of the conservative elements in Allanea to use the CBBC take-away service to bring food to a variety of conservative events. This could be in relation to the tensions in McKagan, and many seem to see eating in CBBC branches a note of protest against the so-called 'grunger movement' there. We on our end pledge to donate a million dollars to the family of each of the 35 grunger victims. We hope that this Tratain hippy feels bad about knowing that his attacks have caused more CBBC branches to be built.

On another note, today, 10% of our stock have been purchased by a bidder who wished to remain anonymous. We will only say it's famous figure in Allanean politics, though not a current politician.

Thank you all for standing with us in this difficult time. And may the sun never set on the Golden Bunny.

Detailed Status Report

Derscon –113,824 branches
Arizona Nova - 87,280 branches
The Macabees – 42,000 branches
Praetonia – 40,000 branches
Allanea – 31,300 branches
Liverpool England – 50,000 branches
Juumanistra - 40,000 branches
Bazalonia – 28,500 branches
Gyrobot – 30,001 branches
Hamptonshire -41,050 branches
Yukatania – 28,000 branches
Crazed Marines – 45,000 branches
Van Luxemburg – 7,500 branches
Dersconi Haven Colonies – 5,000 branches.
Jeruselem – 23,000 branches
The Parthians – 6,000 branches
Hallad – 3,000 branches
Cherry Ridge – 2,500 branches
LifeWyze Facilities – 2032
Kahanistan – 1,500 branches
Kanami – 1,500 branches
Psychotic Psychos – 1,000 branches
Last Anarchy Order - 1,000 branches
Leafanistan – 750 branches
Super American VX man – 700 branches.
McKagan – 50 branches
Auman – 666 branches
Zarustra – 500 branches
Callisdrun – 500 branches
Swilatia – 500 branches
Atheistic Right – 550 branches
Kirisubo – 300 branches
Rhominia – 200 branches
Pacitalia – 150 branches
The Beltway – 150 branches
Democratic Colonies: 100 Branches
Demotivated Dilberts – 100 branches
Communistic Governments – 100 branches
Menelmacar – 100 branches
Casari – 100 branches
Alcona and Hubris – 100 branches
Otagia – 100 branches
The Conglomerate - 100 branches
Pantocratoria – [unknown]
Billy Asko – 200 branches
The Territory – 100
Roania – 45 branches
San Haven – 16 branches
Rejistania – 5 branches
Milchama – 2 branches
The Phoenix Milita – 1 branch
Lame Bums – 1 branch

Total- 616,683 branches, including branches licensed/contracted but not fully built.

Major Shareholders

Knyaz Xavier Andropov (Derscon) – 5%
Queen Mariah (Jeruselem) – 5%
King John Antonette (Cherry Ridge) – 5%
Shah Kosru (The Parthians) – 2.5%.
Anonymous Owner 1 – 10%.

A note from the Government and King of Bilky Asko...

Any losses made by CBC paying out will be replenished by The People's Republic of Bilky Asko. We are in deep sorrow for the people lost. We have placed posters on lamp posts outside each CBC restaurant.

[Open Message]

To: Allanean Government
From: McKagan Imperial State Department

We are terribly sorry for the attacks your citizens have taken inside our own borders. During a set of allegations made against this government, we explained why we were not able to act against the grunge movement time and time again. Now that the CBBC has less outlets - there's a good chance that we'll be able to make arrests. However, the few remaining CBBC outlets are facing stronger and stronger violence. It is at this time we are putting our foot down to end the violence. The CBBC has one week to completely and unconditionally cease and vacate all operations inside continental McKagan. Inside connections with the grunge movement tell us that there will be no more violence within this one week period.

This government has been accused of being powerless to defeat violence. We are not - and this proves it without a doubt.

Office 331
1217 Government Way
Balkan City, 85546
Druid Province, Armed Holy Democratic Empire of Asgarnieu


TO: Cute Bunny Burger Corporation
FROM: Economic Bureau, Corporate Division
SUBJECT: Cute Bunny Burger Corporation in Asgarnieu


Greetings. We are very interested in having The Cute Bunny Burger Corporation operating in Asgarnieu. We feel that this would be a major economic opportunity, for Fast-Food locations are very profitable. We are willing to pay you $1,000,000,000.00 USD to open 10 shops in Asgarnieu. The locations, should you choose to accept our offer should be placed in the following cities:

-5 (Balkan City)
-2 (Stafford)
-1 (Humo)
-2 (North Greer)

We only ask that you pay $1,000,000.00 USD per fiscal year per location. We thank you for considering our offer. Please contact us with your stance on our offer. Thank you.


Respectfully,

Secretary Hannah T. Virginia
Secretary of Corporate Economic Security

Official Announcement of the Cute Bunny Burger Corporation

Today, the blatant injustice embodied by the grunger pseudoculture of McKagan has triumphed. Under the guise of fighting violence, the government of McKagan has decided to punish the victim, driving the last 50 Cute Bunny Burger outlets out of the country. As of now, the personnel are being evacuated to the Allanean Navy's First Force Projection Fleet, and will leave the vicinity of McKagan after the end of the evacuation operation. One aircraft carrier, however, is going to be left, according to the navy, for Observation Operations.

This is all. Always remember those killed by the grungerites. Remember, and never forgive.

May the sun never set on the Golden Bunny.

Detailed Status Report

Derscon –113,824 branches
Arizona Nova - 87,280 branches
Liverpool England – 60,000 branches
Hamptonshire -51,050 branches
Crazed Marines – 45,000 branches
The Macabees – 42,000 branches
Praetonia – 40,000 branches
Allanea – 36,300 branches
Juumanistra - 40,000 branches
Bazalonia – 28,500 branches
Gyrobot – 30,001 branches
Yukatania – 28,000 branches
Jeruselem – 23,000 branches
The Parthians – 16,000 branches
Van Luxemburg – 7,500 branches
Dersconi Haven Colonies – 5,000 branches.
Hallad – 3,000 branches
Cherry Ridge – 2,500 branches
LifeWyze Facilities – 2032
Kahanistan – 1,500 branches
Kanami – 1,500 branches
Psychotic Psychos – 1,000 branches
Last Anarchy Order - 1,000 branches
Leafanistan – 750 branches
Super American VX man – 700 branches.
Auman – 666 branches
Zarustra – 500 branches
Callisdrun – 500 branches
Swilatia – 500 branches
Atheistic Right – 550 branches
Kirisubo – 300 branches
Rhominia – 200 branches
Pacitalia – 150 branches
The Beltway – 150 branches
Democratic Colonies: 100 Branches
Demotivated Dilberts – 100 branches
Communistic Governments – 100 branches
Menelmacar – 100 branches
Casari – 100 branches
Alcona and Hubris – 100 branches
Otagia – 100 branches
The Conglomerate - 100 branches
Pantocratoria – [unknown]
Billy Asko – 200 branches
The Territory – 100
Roania – 45 branches
San Haven – 16 branches
Rejistania – 5 branches
Milchama – 2 branches
The Phoenix Milita – 1 branch
Lame Bums – 1 branch

Total- 642,633 branches, including branches licensed/contracted but not fully built.

Major Shareholders

Knyaz Xavier Andropov (Derscon) – 5%
Queen Mariah (Jeruselem) – 5%
King John Antonette (Cherry Ridge) – 5%
Shah Kosru (The Parthians) – 2.5%.
Anonymous Owner 1 – 10%.

Message to Asgarieu

This sum would only be profitable if we ran them as really big, three story, BunnyPalaces. Is that amenable?

[Open Message from Duff Tratain]

The sun has finally stopped shining on the Golden Bunny in McKagan! This is a victory for anarchy and free government! The "hippy scum," as the CBBC so inaccurately put it, has defeated the powerful corporation and accomplished its goals. This is a truely moving day for me, personally. I'm officially calling for all violence against the CBBC to end. Our goal was never to defeat them entirely. Only to drive them from McKagan. We have accomplished that goal.

[END]

In the days after the CBBC's departure from McKagan, the streets are reclaimed. Violence stops and the neighborhoods begin to calm down. The McKagan National Police Force (MNPF) makes several shows of force in Triesa - and even the normal gang violence begins to suddenly dwindle. Many people begin to believe that, with the CBBC gone, the inner city of Triesa may turn into a calm place. Only time, and the funding of MNPF Tactical Squads, can tell.

Critical Disillusions new album finally starts pre-production - getting Duff Tratain more occupied with the operations inside his mansion/recording studio and less likely to make many more public announcements.

Off the coast of McKagan, tensions continue to run high. The McKagan fleet that was so quickly put together to stand between the possibly-invading fleet and the McKagan homeland wasn't even completely in formation by the time it was asked to depart. However, the sign of an Allanean aircraft carrier sitting in international waters, the Imperial McKagan Navy still had plenty of reason to be paranoid.

To counter the "threat," a Composite Air Wing of the McKagan Naval Air Force's new KLA-41 Lightweight Fighters and supported by KLR-36 Tactical Strike Fighters is secretly readied at the nearest airbase. Futhermore, a single Avisron Class Destroyer moves into the theatre overtly to provide the "official" response. The not-so-official response, however, consists of two Hamlin Class Escorts (the compact and stealth, advanced anti-aircraft/missile platform) that use their stealth characteristics to slip into the area.

http://img444.imageshack.us/img444/1619/swnews39tz.gif
"Cute bunny" fails in Swilatia (p15)
Week of 29th May 2006
other news:National Commies add banning money to their agenda (p10) Lordi turns out to really be a bunch of monsters (p27) University of Vilvek finds a way of talking to the dead. (p54) and other stuff that REALLY HAPPENED.

15- THE NEWSPAPER
The bunny is cute. but their byrgers arent good one bit
The cute bunnie burger company, an Allenean fast food corporporation recently made a silly descision to exist in Swilatia. There was a test market and it failed MISERABLY, with only 500 million people liking the burgers. Even though the locations that were set up like Swilatian-style fastfood stands on the street actually did kinda well, the rest failed. They were NOT the most popular choice of people at food courts in the trade centres, but the locations that did the worst were the eat-in ones on the street, as fast-food and restaurant are not something that swilatian consider to be a good combination. they made a few million dollars in the testmarket, but I personally don't think this company will do to good in Swilatia. They are not coming close to what McRonalds and Henriksa are making, wihich is 40 billion and 25 billion, respectively. Serously. The only people who are going to the Cute Bunny are those stupid conspiracy theorists. You know ho I mean. I mean thepeople who think that McRonalds and Henriksa use the meat of REcently deceased humans in their Hamburgers. The rest all know that there is no such ingredient in their burgers, and just plain know that McRonald's and Henriksa just make better burgers. Cute Bunny has no popularity and never will have any. It may surprise some of these 500 million lunatics when the company goes bankrup in Swilatia, but it will not surprise us.

OOC; really they are doing well, and many new branches opened. There are now 600 in Swilatia. The Newspaper is a joke magazine that reports false news, or real news twisted so much that its false.

President Smith knew this would end in war if overwhelming firepower was not brought in. Plus he was a fan of the Bison Bacon Buffallo Burger, so he ordered the CM Navy in with a total of seven Rumsfeld Class battleships, thirty Bush battleships, Twenty Regal class submersible carriers, six Synfaxi class submarines, and the accompaning escort ships. And on each ship a picture of a Marine eating a burger and trampelling a hippy was painted. Mmmmm....burgers

OOC: the link for most of these ships can be found here: http://s6.invisionfree.com/International_Mall/index.php?showforum=43

and note I am an ally with Allanea in FT but not MT.

To: Oppurtunities and Exchanges Commitee of Evitravresnocia
From: Chief Goverment Officer Phillip Platin, Representitive of the United Corporations of Evitravresnocia
Re: CBC Burger Branches - Green Light

Cute Bunny Burger will be allowed and invited to compete in our free and glorius market, as all corporations from all corners of the enlightened world are. As the result of the Commitee's analysis of the fast food market indicates that all inside corporations will benefit from the appearence of a new competitor with a new form of product. In fact, the CGOs of United Corporations are as eagerly anticipating the arrival of this new brand of competition as the serfs are anticipating the burgers themselves.

However, to keep the new competitor in check and ensure that local businesses continue their evolution and profitability, CBC is to be given class I goverment support ONLY (licenses and locations) until suitable trade agreements can be reached with at least seventeen of the thirty United Corporations. The top five interested UC affiliates are Nuclear Chef Cooking Devices, UraniYum Bubble Gum Corp, Caffienofuge Cola, Glowwater, Plastiques and Plastics, and Soylent Beef. All are interested in owning at least 2% of BCB Please ensure that their CFO and CGO (or CEO if their national structure is developed in such a way) recieve this list so that we can help them provide our free and caring serfs in a greater capacity!

President Smith knew this would end in war if overwhelming firepower was not brought in. Plus he was a fan of the Bison Bacon Buffallo Burger, so he ordered the CM Navy in with a total of seven Rumsfeld Class battleships, thirty Bush battleships, Twenty Regal class submersible carriers, six Synfaxi class submarines, and the accompaning escort ships. And on each ship a picture of a Marine eating a burger and trampelling a hippy was painted. Mmmmm....burgers

OOC: the link for most of these ships can be found here: http://s6.invisionfree.com/International_Mall/index.php?showforum=43

and note I am an ally with Allanea in FT but not MT.

[OOC: Could we not do that? There's not going to be a war between that aircraft carrier and the IMN forces - my post was just to add closure to my involvement directly in this thread. I've already commented elsewhere about how I won't do an RP where this turns into some massive world war. If people cannot RP without some sort of primal instict to feel good about themself in some sort of cliche and corny World War - it's still not my problem. There are going to be no massive fleets sitting off McKagan because of a cultural icon. This is nonnegotiable.]

Najaster, Capital of Kahanistan

Supreme Soviet meeting

The Supreme Soviet was debating over what to do about the fact that CBBC was now partially owned by hostile regimes such as Parthia. Kahanistan had not been friendly to Parthia because of its treatment of leftists and Shoobans, but had so far kept quiet, possibly because it had faced CAD before and not fared too well, and it did not wish to antagonize its larger Middle Eastern neighbor.

All over Kahanistan, about two million protestors, many of whom had participated in the anti-LifeWyze protests earlier, demonstrated in the streets urging the Supreme Soviet to kick out the "Allanean cultural imperialists", "capitalist pig-dogs," and "Parthian scum." Other protestors wore Che Guevara T-shirts, even if they weere centrists or right-leaning moderates. The Interior Ministry urged all citizens who were, or appeared to be, of Persian heritage to stay indoors and not come outside without a gun. They did not need a repeat of the brutal anti-Amestrian riots which had killed hundreds of thousands of people, most of whom were, appeared to be, or were friendly to Amestrians.

"We do not need an international incident with Parthia, now," said Senator Mohammed bin Abdul Haram. "Defense spending is at an all-time low, taxes are the lowest they've been in ages, and we're still battling Kraven in the south."

"Agreed," said another senator. "Further, we don't need a McKagan situation with Allanea. Is there a way we can get our people to calm down? This hysteria only needs somebody to set it off, and I don't think the Parthians will be as merciful to us about attacks on their people as the Amestrians."

The old man nodded his head. "What if we bought stock in CBBC, too? We'd probably be helping them out, most people here won't buy from CBBC if the Parthians got 2.5% of what they paid CBBC... unless Kahanistan got more than that. It'll cost, but it would help out CBBC and Allanea."

Later that day, the Supreme Soviet approved the purchase of 7.5% of CBBC stock, and notified the Ministry of Commerce. Now all that was left was for CBBC to approve the deal.

DEMOCRATIC SOVIET REPUBLIC OF KAHANISTAN
Ministry of Commerce

On behalf of the Government of Kahanistan, I have been authorized to offer up to 40% of the commerce budget for 7.5% of CBBC stock. We hope that the part-ownership of CBBC by our government will encourage patriotic citizens to buy CBBC and regain many of the customers who were lost to external politics.

Signed,
Angus McKimble,
Minister of Commerce

Message to Asgarieu

This sum would only be profitable if we ran them as really big, three story, BunnyPalaces. Is that amenable?


Absolutly.

From PNN.pc

http://www.thebesthamburgerrecipes.com/images/20-best-delicious-hamburger-recipes.jpg
Cute Bunny Burger Corporation's Pacitalian operations may
be shut down at least temporarily after a routine spring health
inspection of fast food franchises in sixteen Pacitalian provinces
revealed multiple infractions that endanger public health
and safety. Violations included food preparation and cleanliness.

No longer cute and cuddly, say health inspectors


by Alessandro Spinodore, Timiocato

You may want to watch out next time you hit a hamburger franchise, especially those of the fastest-growing fast-food corporation on the planet, because Cute Bunny Burger Corporation does not put pay to Pacitalian food preparation and cleanliness standards according to several different inspectors who recently did a massive routine sweep of Pacitalia's fast-food establishments over a 35-day period.

The inspectors cited the usual problems at franchises but the worst offenders by far were the restaurants under the CBBC brand. One inspector cited multiple red-zone infractions including improper refrigeration of vegetables, allowing some cases of supplies to sit at room temperature for days. One restaurant was even found to have had meat sitting out at room temperature for nearly a week, because the freezers were overfilled with expiring product.

Inspectors found much higher than legal levels of rodent droppings in 129 of CBBC's 151 Pacitalian franchises, as well as improper storage methods of perishable, non-perishable and supplementary product, and kitchen items like bowls, griddle lifters, knives and thermometers. Three CBBC franchises received citations for not sanitising preparation surfaces and thermometers, and four more were docked for not using disposable gloves during food preparation.

An inspector from the Pacitalian Food Safety Administration (PFSA) said she even caught three CBBC employees "picking their noses and then not proceeding to wash their hands", and that there was a general lack of handwashing within most of the Bunny restaurants she visited.

93 restaurants received a failing grade below 30 percent (the worst offender getting a grade of 8 percent) meaning they were immediately shut down for an indefinite time period, while another 26 received between 30 and 50 percent and were ordered to rectify the infractions by the next inspection in one month's time. All but one of the CBBC restaurants received a grade below 67 percent. Vita Holdings Corporation, the company that manages CBBC's 151 franchises in Pacitalia, did not return calls or make a statement regarding the massive infraction by its restaurants.

CBBC has gained international media attention for its rapid growth from a small Allanean franchise to become the epitome of global capitalizm. From operating just a few hundred stores in those United States, the multinational corporation now operates just under 600,000 restaurants, both owned/operated and franchised, in nearly 100 countries. Derscon alone has 135,000 branches of the fast-food chain.

The news of the massive infraction is causing a stir among Pacitalians who already shunned the franchise in favour of domestic options. And while none of the customers to CBBC have gotten sick yet, inspectors say it is only a matter of time before someone does come down with a serious case of food poisoning.

"The way these restaurants are operated, it is a huge surprise to everyone at the PFSA that no one has contracted e-coli or salmonellosis infections," one inspector who spoke on condition of anonymity told PNN.pc staff Tuesday. "There are numerous glaring problems with the operation standards of these restaurants, at least in Pacitalia. I would not be in any way surprised if the same infractions were occurring in other markets."

CBBC's flagship restaurant at Piazza Andonesca in Nortopalazzo was among those closed indefinitely for these serious health violations. There is no word on whether the PFSA will ever allow the 93 closed franchises to reopen.

-- With files from the Pacitalian News Wire --

(OOC: How does one go about purchasing shares? I cannot find a reference in this thread. Cost and amount would be good.)

[OOC: Could we not do that? There's not going to be a war between that aircraft carrier and the IMN forces - my post was just to add closure to my involvement directly in this thread. I've already commented elsewhere about how I won't do an RP where this turns into some massive world war. If people cannot RP without some sort of primal instict to feel good about themself in some sort of cliche and corny World War - it's still not my problem. There are going to be no massive fleets sitting off McKagan because of a cultural icon. This is nonnegotiable.]
ooc: Don't worry, I'm not going to even participate in a war nor start one. I just need to get my new President saber rattling a little and "protecting our business intrests". Nothing will come from this just know you have a fleet stationed off your shore, conveniently halfway between your shore and our weapons testing grounds.

Tel Morlin Dispatch-Moon-Telegram-Update-Sun-Star-Picayune-Times

News Section

Kfar Elyon closes branch Glenard may soon follow

The rioters seem to be winning as Kfar Elyon closed its branch of the CBBC today allaying health fears that had happened in Pacitalia that had caused some of its CBBC shops to close down. The Mayor of the town, Alon Groval said, "I wanted to keep them despite the protesters then they showed me this and I don't want the citizens of my town to die. Espiecially now with the chain asking me why the profit is not good and the protesters boycotting so that our citizens can no longer give the basics neccesities to their families. The boycotts worked and the health fears were the final straw for me. We're done with the CBBC and foreign corporations for a loooooong time."

With Kfar Elyon closing its branch that means that the small Milchamian town of Glenard, which most Milchamians had never heard of until this incident, are the only town with a CBBC branch in Milchama. According to our economist Glenard has not been hit as hard with it's product as they export jobs to other cities and towns across Milchama and just simply are not as big as Kfar Elyon. The prostesters have now focused all their efforts on the small suburb of Ispatal. Many in Glenard have welcomed the CBBC saying, "This has really buoyed our tourist industry and helped us get on the market." Others have found it, "A nice change of pace from eating momma's cooking everyday. The food is good enough."

Finally Our Great Leader Tim Gonnenberg has weighed in on the issue saying, "The CBBC is clearly in our country for profits but the cities can have them if they want to as long as they do not make a too big a fuss."
The Limad party was much more strict as they called for some of the coalition in the Konneset including the Great Eagle and Warrior parties to vote for their bill to get rid of the CBBC in Milchama once and for all. They also wanted to stop capatalist countries from investing ever in Milchama.

The first bill could pass but the second bill many from all sides of the political are against it as many realize that the economic realities of the world are too big to completely stop capatalist investment.

More on the political implications of the CBBC in Alexandria and in the Conneset can be found on page 3.

ooc: Don't worry, I'm not going to even participate in a war nor start one. I just need to get my new President saber rattling a little and "protecting our business intrests". Nothing will come from this just know you have a fleet stationed off your shore, conveniently halfway between your shore and our weapons testing grounds.

[OOC: No means no - but whatever. I'm not dragging out another argument in an IC thread.]

Omni-Globe international directors begin buying stock from CBBC to expand CBBC branches to its corporate mines

Recent affluence by the CBBC has other corporations wanting to strongarm their way in the fast food industry. Omni-Globe, a multipurpose corporation has been using its share of stocks which consists of 20% at the moment due to Gyrobot's frightening economy to expand to the mining asteroids of space. Now no space carrier could say they see a CBB every Warp Mile.

OOC: Well, not 20%... 5% is good, I hope. It's still HUGE FUCKLOADS OF MONEY.:) I'll post later with the details, Gyrobot.

((Knootoss would have a lot of CBB branches. Add at wish.
-Knoot))

OOC: Knoot is back!?

OOC: Knoot is at work and has to wait for other people to do stuff before he can do stuff. Knoot isn't feeling like writing stories about WoW right now. Knoot does kinda miss NS >_>

Official Cute Bunny Burger Corporation Newscast

Good day, friends and Freemen. There are bad news again for the followers of the Bunny – we had a branch closed by the government of Milchama, and the Knesset there is looking now to ban all foreign investment – yes, we kid you not. In Pacitalia, 93 branches have been temporarily shut down for 'health infractions'. In response, CBBC has already fired all those guilty of such infraction, and is now considering other forms of amending the damage, such as paying compensation to Pacitalian customers.

But there are also good news. We have seen new branches open in Asgarnieu and Evitravresnocia, as well as in Knootoss, where new investments have allowed us to have a test run of 10,000 branches. What new investments, you ask? Well, first of all, Mike Kowalski from Crazed Marines bought some stock. So did OmniGlobe, Inc. in Gyrobot, where 20,000 branches have been set up with their help – we are now at half market capacity there. Estimated market capacity has been reached in Hamptonshire as well.

The Kahanistan government has offered to buy up large amounts of our stock, and we are forced to refuse – to have stock owned by a socialist nation would affect negatively the press that CBBC has in Allanea, and cause a massive customer loss in many of our capitalist nations. We are currently looking at mergers with companies there.


Detailed Status Report

Derscon –113,824 branches
Arizona Nova - 87,280 branches
Hamptonshire -65,050 branches
Liverpool England – 60,000 branches
Yukatania – 50,000 branches
Gyrobot – 50,001 branches
Crazed Marines – 45,000 branches
The Macabees – 42,000 branches
Praetonia – 40,000 branches
Allanea – 36,300 branches
Juumanistra - 40,000 branches
Bazalonia – 28,500 branches
Jeruselem – 23,000 branches
The Parthians – 16,000 branches
Knootosss – 10,000 branches
Van Luxemburg – 7,500 branches
Dersconi Haven Colonies – 5,000 branches.
Hallad – 3,000 branches
Cherry Ridge – 2,500 branches
LifeWyze Facilities – 2032
Kahanistan – 1,500 branches
Kanami – 1,500 branches
Psychotic Psychos – 1,000 branches
Last Anarchy Order - 1,000 branches
Leafanistan – 750 branches
Super American VX man – 700 branches.
Auman – 666 branches
Zarustra – 500 branches
Callisdrun – 500 branches
Swilatia – 600 branches
Atheistic Right – 550 branches
Kirisubo – 300 branches
Rhominia – 200 branches
Pacitalia – 67 branches
The Beltway – 150 branches
Democratic Colonies: 100 Branches
Demotivated Dilberts – 100 branches
Communistic Governments – 100 branches
Menelmacar – 100 branches
Evitravresnocia – 100 branches
Casari – 100 branches
Alcona and Hubris – 100 branches
Otagia – 100 branches
The Conglomerate - 100 branches
Pantocratoria – [unknown]
Billy Asko – 200 branches
The Territory – 100
Roania – 45 branches
San Haven – 16 branches
Asgarnieu – 6 branches
Rejistania – 5 branches
Milchama – 1 branches
The Phoenix Milita – 1 branch
Lame Bums – 1 branch

Total- 696,645 branches, including branches licensed/contracted but not fully built.

Major Shareholders

Knyaz Xavier Andropov (Derscon) – 5%
Queen Mariah (Jeruselem) – 5%
King John Antonette (Cherry Ridge) – 5%
OmniGlobe, Incorporated – 5%
Shah Kosru (The Parthians) – 2.5%.
Mike Kowalski (Crazed Marines) – 2.5%
Anonymous Owner 1 – 10%.

OOC: McKagan, can you telegram me or something? I have an idea…

OOC:does this CBC serve any soylent products by any chance? if so, there could be a huge potential market in Aribtorpedo.

Supermarket Chain BAldi Offers CBBC Home
BAldi offers "A chain per supermarket" to Cute Bunny Burger
Large Supermarket Chain BAldi has offered to host a chain of Cute Bunny Burger at each branch of their store. This gives CBBC an extra 800 branches in Bilky Asko.
Other supermarkets have opted their own Takeaway-esque café, but these have given massive losses to rivals Bigl, Baggo, Pesco and Gainsberry's. Bigwigs at BAldi have said that "this will be a long term relationship between the companies" and BAldi wish to give the Golden Bunny the chance to use some of BAldi's products.(e.g. napkins, toilet roll, clothing, decorating etc.)
Baldi expect a reply in a few days and say "they look forward to the result."
The Currant Bun, 31 May 2006

OOC:does this CBC serve any soylent products by any chance? if so, there could be a huge potential market in Aribtorpedo.

What's a soylent product?

OOC: he wants soyburgers....damn hippies
IC:
Mike reviewed his stock portfolio and was pleased. His dividends were placed into a trust fund for his children and the actual stocks placed into a charitable fund. He felt guilty that so many orphans were created during his Presidency and had always wanted to take care of them and this was his way of doing so.

http://img375.imageshack.us/img375/2254/sbc29vj.gif

The Cute bunny burger corporation, which started as a 500 branch test market located only in major cities has grown increasingly popular, and now has as much as 650 branches in Swilaita. If trends continue, it could become more popular than McRonald's and Henriksa, which are the largest fast food chains in the Democratic Capitalist Empire of Swilatia.

Also, the hypermarket chain Shopsmart has considered adding CBBC to their food courts, which could increase the amount of Cbbc locations in Swilatia by up to 70. Even though there are more shopsmarts in Swilatia than that, only a few of them have food courts. Also, if The Cute bunny accepts this offer, this will further increase the popularity of the Cute bunny in Swilatia.

OOC: Nope.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Soylent_Green

---

Najaster, Capital of Kahanistan

Office of Angus McKimble, Minister of Commerce

McKimble listened to the radio. ...and we are forced to refuse – to have stock owned by a socialist nation would affect negatively the press that CBBC has in Allanea, and cause a massive customer loss in many of our capitalist nations.

The furious Commerce Minister grabbed the old land phone and called the Ministry of Foreign Affairs. When the secretary responded, he barked out, "Put Margaret Delray on the line." The secretary complied.

"I'll put you through to Dr. Delray, she's in her office right now." She pressed a button to switch the connection.

McKimble roared at her. "So it's OK for Khosru the Turd, who basically IS the Parthian government, to own CBBC stock, but not one of Allanea's allies?"

Delray was a little shocked at having her head bitten off just after picking up the phone. "What?"

"The Parthians... bought up loads... of CBBC stock. CBBC won't sell stock to us because they're worried about losing customers. How many customers do you think they'll lose if 1/40 on each sale goes to line that Shooban-eating freak's pockets?" McKimble was speaking to the Minister of Foreign Affairs as if she were a four-year-old.

"Probably a lot," said Delray uneasily. She was lounging at her desk, wearing a Che Guevara T-shirt and shorts, which she rarely wore in the office, as a show of support for the Supreme Soviet's offer.

"That's an understatement," McKimble said crossly. He had calmed down somewhat, and was no longer taking his frustrations out on the Minister of Foreign Affairs. "It wouldn't surprise me if those Duff Tratain fans decided to start something..."

"Well, what do you want the Ministry of Foreign Affairs to do? This isn't the Allanean government we're dealing with, it's a corporation that hasn't breached any of our regulations..."

"I don't know... talk to the Allaneans or something. This is basically a diplomatic matter, they did insult our nation."

---

An hour later

The Ministers met in Delray's office. It was small, a recliner chair, desk, and laptop computer, decorated with posters of green fields filled with flowers, lakes filled with aquatic life, and cities with no smog.

They decided to send a letter of protest to the CBBC headquarters in Allanea, and send a copy to the Allanean President, though they didn't know what it would accomplish.

DEMOCRATIC SOVIET REPUBLIC OF KAHANISTAN
Ministry of Commerce
Ministry of Foreign Affairs

The Government of Kahanistan is deeply offended by the decision of Cute Bunny Burger Corporation, Inc. to reject our offer to purchase stocks in the corporation. The reason given was that it would cause the loss of customers in capitalist nations. How many more customers in liberal democracies will be lost when 2.5% of CBBC's income goes to the pockets of a man who kills Shoobans for fun, executes in barbaric fashion people who wear Che Guevara T-shirts, and is known to murder his political opponents?

Signed,
Angus McKimble,
Minister of Commerce

Margaret Delray,
Minister of Foreign Affairs

Attachment: A photograph of the Foreign Minister wearing a Che Guevara T-shirt. She is 42 years old, 5'4" (163 cm), with shoulder-length light red hair and blue eyes. She has a freckled face and a fair complexion, apparently not someone who goes outside a lot in the desert climate, at least not without something labeled SPF 50+.

OOC: Before I respond, can you give me names of some Kahanistani fast-food chains?

OOC: There aren't that many of them, most of them have been bought out by your generic (i.e. RL) fast-food chains. Mystery Max's, one of the few survivors of the buyouts, managed to stay afloat with its Mystery Meat, which nobody seems to be able to identify...

They're also the source of much of the anti-CBBC sentiment, and they've managed to get most of the other fast-food places on their side. Of course, with Khosru's hand in the cookie jar, the anti-CBBC sentiment is self-perpetuating now.

There are about 13,000 Mystery Maxes still in Kahanistan.

Official Message of CBBC to Mystery Max Management

We are willing to purchase Mystery Max in it's entirety. For this, we will pay you $obscene_amount_of_money and transfer to you 1% of the CBBC stock.

What's a soylent product?

Made of people.

OOC: Yup. (http://datacore.sciflicks.com/soylent_green/sounds/soylent_green_people.wav)
Official Message of CBBC to Mystery Max Management

We are willing to purchase Mystery Max in it's entirety. For this, we will pay you $obscene_amount_of_money and transfer to you 1% of the CBBC stock.

Max Granwell, the President of Mystery Max Fast Food, Inc., closely read the CBBC letter through his Coke-bottle glasses. He chuckled at the idea that he would sell out to Cute Bunny Burger Corporation.

Granwell had resisted the McDonaldses, Taco Bells, Wendy'ses, Arby'ses, and other corporations which had approached him about selling out. He retrieved an old-fashioned gold pen from the holder on his desk and wrote to the CBBC management.

Mystery Max Fast Food, Inc.
Office of the President

Fuck off.

I have rejected offers ten times yours, and with your corporation part-owned by a flagrant human rights abuser, I will be absorbing many of the customers you will no doubt lose.

If we were to buy CBBC stocks, then we, too, would share in the losses you will sustain at the hands of millions who will boycott you until the Golden Bunny is driven from Kahanistan, while we are swimming in shekels.

Signed,
Max Granwell,
President of Mystery Max Fast Food, Inc.

OOC: Kahanistan, haven't we discussed exactly this through TG?

The Sensible Economist Page 4

With Cute Bunny Burger Corporation spreading like some sort of virus it would be prudent to analyze its business strategy. They market with a good name, provide an extremely diverse menu and with a lot of venture capital it is no surprise that Cute Bunny Burger Corporation has taken the world's lead in fast food marketing.

However, a recent protest by pro-Reformist Communists in front of several resturants in Northern Loyalist-held Leafanistan is making many people worry about their safety. Their sit-in protests and subsequent 'removal' by military police units terrified many away from the resturants which sap profits for many Leafanistani businessmen. A speech by the Governour-General did nothing to dissude the brainwashed youth from continue their disruption of Cute Bunny Burger franchises.

Yesterday, a bomb threat was phoned in and a van near a drive-thru window detonated, injuring 9, and forcing the military police to close the resturant and put on heightened security the others. Can Cute Bunny Burger survive in a nation in the midst of a low-level Civil War with youths running around with bombs and AKs?

Us sensible economists say with enough confidence in themselves, Cute Bunny Burger will have a franchise in Memorial Square and the Reformist Capital Bunker.

Official CBBC Market Report

While growth continues throughout the CBBC 'empire', we have run into a variety of difficulties that will soon be reported. Market capacity has been reached in Yukatania and Liverpool England, and we have PR problems in Pacitalia and Kahanistan. To resolve these problems, we have appointed a Pacitalian-native executive to the direction of the Pacitalian Department, and renamed the Pacitalian CBB restaurants to Bunny Bistros. This is supposed to help, though we don't know whether it will.


Detailed Status Report

Derscon –113,824 branches
Liverpool England – 112,000 branches
Yukatania – 100,000 branches
Arizona Nova - 87,280 branches
Hamptonshire -65,050 branches
Gyrobot – 50,001 branches
Crazed Marines – 45,000 branches
The Macabees – 42,000 branches
Praetonia – 40,000 branches
Allanea – 36,300 branches
Juumanistra - 50,000 branches
Bazalonia – 28,500 branches
Jeruselem – 23,000 branches
The Parthians – 16,000 branches
Knootosss – 10,000 branches
Van Luxemburg – 7,500 branches
Dersconi Haven Colonies – 5,000 branches.
Hallad – 3,000 branches
Cherry Ridge – 2,500 branches
LifeWyze Facilities – 2032
Kahanistan – 1,500 branches
Kanami – 1,500 branches
Psychotic Psychos – 1,000 branches
Last Anarchy Order - 1,000 branches
Leafanistan – 800 branches
Super American VX man – 700 branches.
Auman – 1,666 branches
Zarustra – 500 branches
Callisdrun – 500 branches
Swilatia – 690 branches
Atheistic Right – 550 branches
Kirisubo – 300 branches
Rhominia – 200 branches
Pacitalia – 67 branches
The Beltway – 150 branches
Democratic Colonies: 100 Branches
Demotivated Dilberts – 100 branches
Communistic Governments – 100 branches
Menelmacar – 100 branches
Evitravresnocia – 100 branches
Casari – 100 branches
Alcona and Hubris – 100 branches
Otagia – 100 branches
The Conglomerate - 100 branches
Pantocratoria – [unknown]
Billy Asko – 400 branches
The Territory – 100
Roania – 45 branches
San Haven – 16 branches
Asgarnieu – 6 branches
Rejistania – 5 branches
Milchama – 1 branches
The Phoenix Milita – 1 branch
Lame Bums – 1 branch

Total- 809,005 branches, including branches licensed/contracted but not fully built. Market capacity has been reached and no growth is currently possible in those nations whose names are denoted in italics.

Major Shareholders

Knyaz Xavier Andropov (Derscon) – 5%
Queen Mariah (Jeruselem) – 5%
King John Antonette (Cherry Ridge) – 5%
OmniGlobe, Incorporated – 5%
Shah Kosru (The Parthians) – 2.5%.
Mike Kowalski (Crazed Marines) – 2.5%
Anonymous Owner 1 – 10%.

Reply to Mystery Max President

Thank you for your polite message.

We offer you $even_more_outrageous_sum, and 3% of the stock in CBBC, in exchange for complete and abject ownership of Mystery Max. We do not believe that, given your position, you can afford to deny your shareholders such a beautiful deal. We remind you that the pure profits of CBBC are currently estimated at 70 billion dollars per annum.

Sincerely yours,
CBBC Staff

Al-Bahr, Kahanistan

Mystery Max Headquarters

President Max Granwell and the Board of Directors were discussing the latest CBBC offer. Granwell, of course, was opposed. At 60 years old, he had spent the last 35 years carving a national icon, a business which he had marketed as a patriotic alternative to the other fast food organizations.

Granwell spoke out. "Of course not! Should we let the Allaneans and Parthians take over our businesses? Should we pay a fraction of our food budget to someone who skins Shooban children alive in front of their parents? Does CBBC even follow the health codes? NO! I say we force them out, and let the people come to us in droves!"

The President's impassioned speech did nothing to soften the hearts of the Board of Directors, who stood to feed at CBBC's corporate trough. They were only out to make money, and cared nothing for the business. They were glad to get shot of Granwell and his ideals.

The Board voted unanimously to sell.

Mystery Max Fast Food, Inc.
Board of Directors

We unanimously accept your offer, and will allow all 13,000 Mystery Max establishments to be converted into Cute Bunny Burger Corporation establishments.

Mr. Granwell himself will be given 5% of our stock, or 0.15% of CBBC stock, and ten billion USD. We will split the rest among ourselves.

Signed,
<All 18 members of the Board of Directors>

That night, Max Granwell suffered a nervous breakdown and was admitted to Al-Bahr City General Hospital.

THE FINANCIAL TIMES
"All the news that is fiscally convenient to disseminate."

They're At It Again
Mile High City, Earth - As part of its ongoing fast food blitz against industry leader TerraTuna, Rheinwürst has quietly contacted CBBC, Inc for franchise licensing rights, according to unnamed sources. Industry speculators have suggested that the chain might lend some "pizazz" to an otherwise spare corporate portfolio.

"It's pretty clear that the Rheinwürst Corporation is going to need some new, which is to say shamelessly imported, style if it's going to compete with TerraTuna's stable lead," said overpaid culinary pundit Chad Llewellyn. "Giving the consumer the choice of eating cute little bunny rabbits is undoubtably... innovative. It seems like a decent direction to head in."

Given the hopelessly decadent nature of Conquestian society, the opportunity to devour the cutest animal possible may actually be a winning proposition. Rheinwürst seems to think so to, as more unconfirmed rumors suggest that it has intimated that it will help the CBBC franchise establish a foothold in the Mile High City in exchange for joint ownership of the Conquestian chain. Anonymous sources claim that Rheinwürst has also offered to buy a full 10% of the public stock of CBBC, Inc.

Official Report of the Cute Bunny Burger Corporation

Well, bunny lovers. We are finally out of the woods with Kahanistan, via our purchase of the main competitor, Mystery Max. We decided that former Mystery Max executives will be appointed to manage the Kahanistan division, which will help our ability to communicate to our customers there. In the meanwhile, the investment from Conquest Inc. allowed us to expand widely into that nation with 15,000 test branches there. We believe that our Rheinwurst shareholders will be content with the kind of income that they'll receive there.

In the meanwhile, growth continued in a variety of other nations Casari, Knootoss, Gyrobot, Auman, Cherry Ridge and Juumanistra, as well as Allanea itself. We have also seen some major increase in our revenue, reaching 82.7 billion in net income this year – thank you God that Allanea has no income tax! Today, we decided we will pay some of this money as dividends to our investors, at 500 million per 1% of the stock. The remaining 32.7 billion will be reinvested into corporate expansion. We hope that this makes our shareholders happy. It certainly makes us happy, bunny lovers.

Good luck!

And may the sun never set on the Golden Bunny!

Detailed Status Report

*Derscon –113,824 branches
*Liverpool England – 112,000 branches
*Yukatania – 100,000 branches
*Arizona Nova - 87,280 branches
*Hamptonshire -65,050 branches
Gyrobot – 60,001 branches
Juumanistra - 60,000 branches
Allanea – 50,300 branches
Crazed Marines – 45,000 branches
*The Macabees – 42,000 branches
*Praetonia – 40,000 branches
*Bazalonia – 28,500 branches
Jeruselem – 26,000 branches
The Parthians – 26,000 branches
Knootosss – 22,000 branches
Kahanistan – 13,500 branches
Van Luxemburg – 7,500 branches
Dersconi Haven Colonies – 5,000 branches.
Hallad – 4,000 branches
Auman – 2,666 branches
Cherry Ridge – 2,700 branches
LifeWyze Facilities – 2,032
Kanami – 1,500 branches
Psychotic Psychos – 1,000 branches
Otagia – 1,000 branches
Last Anarchy Order - 1,000 branches
Leafanistan – 800 branches
Super American VX man – 700 branches.
Zarustra – 500 branches
Callisdrun – 500 branches
Swilatia – 690 branches
Atheistic Right – 550 branches
Kirisubo – 300 branches
Rhominia – 200 branches
Pacitalia – 67 branches
The Beltway – 150 branches
Democratic Colonies: 100 Branches
Demotivated Dilberts – 100 branches
Communistic Governments – 100 branches
Menelmacar – 100 branches
Evitravresnocia – 100 branches
Casari – 1,000 branches
*Alcona and Hubris – 100 branches
The Conglomerate - 100 branches
Pantocratoria – [unknown]
Billy Asko – 400 branches
The Territory – 100
Roania – 45 branches
San Haven – 16 branches
Asgarnieu – 6 branches
Rejistania – 5 branches
*Milchama – 1 branches
*The Phoenix Milita – 1 branch
Lame Bums – 1 branch

Total Branches: 866,005 branches, including branches licensed/contracted but not fully built. Market capacity has been reached and no growth is currently possible in those nations whose names are denoted with an asterisk.

Net Revenue: 620.428 billion

Net Income: 87.805 billion

Major Shareholders

Knyaz Xavier Andropov (Derscon) – 5%
Queen Mariah (Jeruselem) – 5%
King John Antonette (Cherry Ridge) – 5%
Rheinwurst: 05%
OmniGlobe, Incorporated – 5%
Former Mystery Max shareholders – 3.5%
Shah Kosru (The Parthians) – 2.5%.
Mike Kowalski (Crazed Marines) – 2.5%
Anonymous Owner 1 – 10%.


OOC: Sorry, Conquest Inc.... I can't sell off more then 5% to you atm, mostly because for RP purposes I want to have as many people as possible owning this corporation. Anonymous Owner is an Allanean character, and he/she/it is the only one so far I'll have owning 10% of the stock.

To everybody else: The revenue of CBBC has been extrapolated, and as you see it's been calculated based on finding out how many times it was bigger then McD and going from there.

The Republic of Aralonia wishes to establish one joint per international airport within its territories as a trial run. With a total of 6 international airports in the nation, we would wish to establish six (6) businesses.

Why airports, you may ask? Good revenue, many people pass through on the go, and perhaps the food can remind them of their homeland.

61,000 CBBC branches report losses: Report
A recent economic report released by the Liverpool England Ministry of Trade and Economc Affairs has concluded that at least 61,000 CBBC outlets - half the total number of chains - have reported losses of at least L£14.2 million. However, despite this, the self-governing Crna Gora Liv Eng, two enclaves within Liverpool England's borders, has reportedly requested for 14,000 branches to be opened within its borders.

With the recent health scare in Pacitalia, health checks have been stepped up at all 112,000 branches across Liverpool England, and so far, 12,611 have been reported to have failed a health inspection - 4,185 badly enough to be shut "indefinitely", while the other outlets were all given warnings. 2,142 of them were given fines of up to L£350,000, a Liverpool England record.

As of now, there are 107,815 operating CBBC outlets within the nation. It is not known if the losses reported by the 61,000 outlets are related to this recent health scare, but many analysts agree that if more of this is reported, the CBBC will continue to lose further in Liverpool England.

Meanwhile, the CBBC-sponsored Four Nations' has been attracting poor crowds, however, the organisers have put it down to the level of play - all four teams are of under-21 level.

Somewhere in the CBBC Headquarters

“I believe we have a small problem in Liverpool England, Sir.”

“Ahem. Cecil, it's not a small problem. They've closed 4,000 branches. That is not small. That is a catastrophe in the making..”

“But Sir, we're opening more branches in Crna Gora Liv Eng then they've closed. Three times the amount of branches.”

“More then three times. But these concerns about the health of the food, they must be eliminated because they become a problem.”

“But... how, Sir?”

“Here's what we do. First, start a health campaign there. Pound them with the facts – how we were endorsed by a major medical corporation, how we sponsor sports, what the fat content in our food is. Compensate everybody who has had complaints. Fire the guilty and promote the innnocent. Come down on them like an angel of bloody doom. I want you to clean our good name in front of the Liverpoolians, do you understand that, Cecil?”

Cecil nodded. ”And if you fail, Cecil, then the only job you will ever get with the Bunny afterwards is flibbing burgers. Do you understand?”

Cecil did.

[tag] for possible post

http://i29.photobucket.com/albums/c275/bilkyasko/TheCurrantBunSmall.png
Only 30pcs - 01 JUN 2006
CBBC SCARE IS A HOAX
But could the chain fail in other countries?
According to a statement released by The OHO (Official Health Organization) the scare that has been running through the lands has been fake. Recent spot checks have found only one restaurant having any problems.
The problem outlet was then closed for refurbishment and was re-checked after it opened. It then passed.
Official Spokesman of The OHO has said "The only thing to worry about is the fact that so many people want to be in the restaurants and people are pushing and shoving. One 25 year old man was suffocated because of a woman's fat bottom got in the way of his path. The woman was oblivious as she was trying to get her child back." The losses reported in Liverpool England were also reported to be fake.
Of course, the pass could be because of Bilky Asko's very strict laws on health, as many people have speculated. Only time will tell.

Foxtrot News Alert
Health Scrae in Iwo Jima

Twenty people fell ill after eating at a single CBBC location in Iwo Jima, sources say. CMDC and CBBC company officials trace it back to a lot of bad herring meat. It is unsure what caused the bird to become diseased or what disease it was actually, however CBBC admits the cook on duty was new and may have not fully cooked the meat. The twenty people are in critical condition at Suribachi Memorial and we are awaiting an official response from both CMDC and CBBC.

http://i29.photobucket.com/albums/c275/bilkyasko/6INewsSmall.png
Breaking News Report

Here at 6I News we have uncovered that Cute Bunny Burger has broken the law by wrongfully killing animals in Bilky Asko. We have uncovered that the rabbits were whacked against a metal shock plate, killing them in a painful and, considered by animal rights activists, wrong way.
There has not yet been an official statement from CBBC, but it seems that they didn't know the country's law and the government may be reluctant to place penalties. But, an announcement from Bilky Asko OQ has said that "any incorrect treatment after 6th June 2006 will incur penalties."
It seems that this was a quite considerable misunderstanding on CBBC's part, but this stroy might develop into something quite controversial.

Official CBBC Report

As of now, Geoff Nates, cook on duty during the food poisoning, is fired. We suspect heavily that he has deliberately sabotaged the production, and that he is a grunger-planted interest. We request that the Crazed Marines government investigate the option of terrorism.

In Billy Asko, we have ordered our officials to comply with all local laws and regulations, as is the ordinary policy of CBBC.

Detailed Status Report

*Derscon –113,824 branches
*Liverpool England – 107,815 branches
*Yukatania – 100,000 branches
*Arizona Nova - 87,280 branches
Gyrobot – 70,001 branches
*Hamptonshire -65,050 branches
Allanea – 60,300 branches
Juumanistra - 60,000 branches
Crazed Marines – 45,000 branches
*The Macabees – 42,000 branches
Jeruselem – 40,000 branches
*Praetonia – 40,000 branches
*Bazalonia – 28,500 branches
The Parthians – 46,000 branches
Knootosss – 22,000 branches
Crna Gora Liv Eng – 14,185 branches
Kahanistan – 13,500 branches
Van Luxemburg – 7,500 branches
Dersconi Haven Colonies – 5,000 branches.
Hallad – 4,000 branches
Auman – 2,666 branches
Cherry Ridge – 3,700 branches
LifeWyze Facilities – 2,032
Kanami – 1,500 branches
Psychotic Psychos – 1,000 branches
Otagia – 1,000 branches
Last Anarchy Order - 1,000 branches
Leafanistan – 800 branches
Super American VX man – 700 branches.
Zarustra – 500 branches
Callisdrun – 500 branches
Swilatia – 690 branches
Atheistic Right – 550 branches
Kirisubo – 300 branches
Rhominia – 200 branches
Pacitalia – 67 branches
The Beltway – 150 branches
Democratic Colonies: 100 Branches
Demotivated Dilberts – 100 branches
Communistic Governments – 100 branches
Menelmacar – 100 branches
Evitravresnocia – 100 branches
Casari – 12,000 branches
*Alcona and Hubris – 100 branches
The Conglomerate - 100 branches
Pantocratoria – [unknown]
Billy Asko – 400 branches
The Territory – 100
Roania – 45 branches
San Haven – 16 branches
Asgarnieu – 6 branches
Aralonia – 6 branches
Rejistania – 5 branches
*Milchama – 1 branches
*The Phoenix Milita – 1 branch
Lame Bums – 1 branch


Total Branches: 942,005 branches, including branches licensed/contracted but not fully built. Market capacity has been reached and no growth is currently possible in those nations whose names are denoted with an asterisk.

Major Shareholders

Knyaz Xavier Andropov (Derscon) – 5%
Queen Mariah (Jeruselem) – 5%
King John Antonette (Cherry Ridge) – 5%
Rheinwurst: 05%
OmniGlobe, Incorporated – 5%
Former Mystery Max shareholders – 3.5%
Shah Kosru (The Parthians) – 2.5%.
Mike Kowalski (Crazed Marines) – 2.5%
Anonymous Owner 1 – 10%.

Go ahead and be in Khenas. Just rember we have strict laws against animal cruelty (but eating meat is allowed).

From Seaburg Independent Online Edition

http://www.ship-technology.com/contractor_images/oy_lautex/image2.jpg
Investors and business leaders hope to make upstart Cute Bunny Burger
a permanent fixture in the Hamptonian Empire.

It was announced earlier today by a spokesman for WorldTech Industries subsidiary WTI Food Services ApS that its profitable Cute Bunny Burger (CBB) franchises will be spun off into an independent company. The unexpected move was made to help the WTI Food Services raise additional capital to be used for further expansions in the agribusiness sector. The new company, to be called CB Foods Ltd., will be headquartered in Portshire. CB Food Ltd. will quickly have to establish itself in the crowded and extremely competitive Hamptonian food services market. Investment analysts have tentatively given their backing to the spin off, increasing hopes that WTI Food Services can raise its projected target of nine trillion kroner.

Some market watchers have, however, seen the move as a way for WTI to insulate itself from the industry. The mega-conglomerate's history with fast food enterprises has been far from stellar. CBB's concentration in McClellen, a Dominion whose populace and legislature are quickly becoming more concerned with healthy eating, has some worried that CBB and other similar chains could be facing rough times ahead.

The Department of Odd and Unusual Questions wishes to know if Vizzerdix Burgers would also be served, seeing as they are of the same family as Rabbits, but are much bigger, and much deadlier.


Signed:

Asdegrtger,

Aquamarinian head of the Deapartment of Odd and Unusual Questions.

THE FINANCIAL TIMES
"All the news that is fiscally convenient to disseminate."

Dead Bunnies Ascendant
Mile High City, Earth - Rheinwürst has seemingly backed the right horse--or, rather, cooked the right rabbit. The muted communications between the food magnate and the corporate headquarters of CBBC, Inc appear to have secured a profitable little chain.

While TerraTuna has not lost much business to the new stores, neither have the 15,000 Cute Bunny Burger test branches been pressed into oblivion. This, despite aggressive attempts by TerraTuna ranging from below-cost product pushing to what may have been a number of firm-sponsored killings. No evidence as to this last, but speculation is rampant. Both TerraTuna and Rheinwürst secured their places as one of the two eminent foodstuff corporations in no small part due to their propensity for violence.

Outright attacks appear to have died out, especially in the wake of a number of bombings thought to be retaliatory measures by Rheinwürst corporate security. Neither side has assumed responsibility for any actions, and as there have been no casualties among middle- or upper- class citizens, no other firms have taken much notice or any action to curtail the violence. Both firms have confined their operations to impoverished districts, and the bloodshed has not exceeded the typical levels inherent to the cutthroat food services industry. It seems no one can be moved to care, as usual.

Aside from the loss of around two hundred branches, the CBB name continues to rise, and profits have been steadily increasing. With the moderate rate of corporate attrition and the strong growth potential, Rheinwürst has signaled to its partners in CBBC to end the testing period and begin opening additional stores.

Dead bunnies. Who knew?

OOC: Alright, then. 5% it is.

Valeneska Republic is opened for you to rxpand in.

http://images.google.com/url?q=http://www.quakeconpics.com/2002/day1/qc2k2.ym.2002-08-15.061.announcements-and-giveaways-to-people-in-food-line.jpg

BOX News Live

"The recent opening of the Cute Bunny Burger Corporation's first branch amid a storm of controversy has gone forward earlier this morning without a hitch. Protestors, especially numerous left-wing wackos, attempted to storm the building alleging that the corporation hires illegal foriegners, drives down wages, and violates basic animal rights laws, before being carried away by police units to nearby correction centers."

"After the branch opened up, the small scrum of passerby quickly became a crowd as the recipes and menu items becam an instant hit. Strategically loacated along Highway 45 linking the cities of Arca, Ascalon, and Telmura, it was a sight as dozens of truckers attempted to park their vehicals and get inside for a bite of the juicy confections."

"Word has it from the government that just now, they have requested an additional three branches to be located nearby, preferably right in a row to reduce crowding along the key intersection."

Grabinia Gazette, Friday 020606

CBC branch opens in Munster
"Will bring much needed foreign currency..." says Archduke Alexander

The Archduke of Grabinia announced yesterday that a deal has been made with the Cute Bunny Burger Corporation as to the opening of two CBC branches in Munster and (later this year) Hannover respectively.

"What made ma close the deal was the name, pure and simple," said Alexander. "Our national animal, the beloved rabbit, as a restaurant? Call me crazy, I had to do it!"

The Archduke further announced that CBC, in spite of being most welcome, cannot serve their signature food, as serving rabbit meat in a form fit for human consumption is punishable by public ridicule or, in severe cases, by jail time.

However, CBC's Bunny-flavored delicacies can still be served.

"I'll be honest with you," said Alexander, "We need the cash. This is not selling out to a corporation. Two franchise restaurants for five million people hardly is. However, my decision is not final, subject, as always, to this sunday's debate sessions. Invites have already been sent."

What becomes of this remains to be seen, but an adoption of the Archduke's Decision is considered likely.

Will Evans, Munster, reporting.

Official News From the Cute Bunny Corporation

Dear friends and shareholders!

We would like to thank you for the attention and investment that you have given Cute Bunny Burger Corporation. It seems, friends and shareholders, that we are growing – even in places where evil terrorists have struck against our branches. In Conquest Incorporated, in the Valeneska Republic, in Khenas, in Grabinias branches have sprung up, and steady growth accompanies us everywhere else.

In fact, we now have crossed the fateful horizon of having over a million branches in sixty different nations. We believe this is time for one thing, and one thing only – an enormous, humongous party. Very soon, we will indeed be holding one in Liberty-City, Allanea. Please contact us for more details.

Good luck, and may the Sun never set on the Golden Bunny!


Detailed Status Report

*Derscon –113,824 branches
*Liverpool England – 107,815 branches
*Yukatania – 100,000 branches
*Arizona Nova - 87,280 branches
The Parthians – 86,000 branches
Gyrobot – 80,001 branches
*Hamptonshire -65,050 branches
Allanea – 60,300 branches
Juumanistra - 60,000 branches
Crazed Marines – 45,000 branches
*The Macabees – 42,000 branches
Jeruselem – 40,000 branches
*Praetonia – 40,000 branches
*Bazalonia – 28,500 branches
Knootosss – 22,000 branches
Conquest, Incorporated – 20,000 branches
Crna Gora Liv Eng – 14,185 branches
Kahanistan – 13,500 branches
Van Luxemburg – 7,500 branches
Dersconi Haven Colonies – 5,000 branches.
Hallad – 4,000 branches
Auman – 2,666 branches
Cherry Ridge – 3,700 branches
LifeWyze Facilities – 2,032
Kanami – 1,500 branches
Psychotic Psychos – 1,000 branches
Otagia – 1,000 branches
Last Anarchy Order - 1,000 branches
Leafanistan – 800 branches
Super American VX man – 700 branches.
Zarustra – 500 branches
Callisdrun – 500 branches
Swilatia – 690 branches
Atheistic Right – 550 branches
Kirisubo – 300 branches
Rhominia – 200 branches
Pacitalia – 67 branches
The Beltway – 150 branches
Democratic Colonies: 100 Branches
Demotivated Dilberts – 100 branches
Communistic Governments – 100 branches
Menelmacar – 100 branches
Evitravresnocia – 100 branches
Grabinia – 100 branches
Casari – 12,000 branches
*Alcona and Hubris – 100 branches
Khenas – 100 branches
The Conglomerate - 100 branches
Pantocratoria – [unknown]
Billy Asko – 400 branches
The Territory – 100
Valeneska Republic – 100 branches
Roania – 45 branches
San Haven – 16 branches
Asgarnieu – 6 branches
Aralonia – 6 branches
Rejistania – 5 branches
*Milchama – 1 branches
*The Phoenix Milita – 1 branch
Lame Bums – 6 branch

Total Branches: 1,012,310 branches, including branches licensed/contracted but not fully built. Market capacity has been reached and no growth is currently possible in those nations whose names are denoted with an asterisk.

Revenue: 807 billion
Net Income: 102.63 billion

Major Shareholders

Knyaz Xavier Andropov (Derscon) – 5%
Queen Mariah (Jeruselem) – 5%
King John Antonette (Cherry Ridge) – 5%
Rheinwurst: 05%
OmniGlobe, Incorporated – 5%
Former Mystery Max shareholders – 3.5%
Shah Kosru (The Parthians) – 2.5%.
Mike Kowalski (Crazed Marines) – 2.5%
Anonymous Owner 1 – 10%.

To Ri-An

We will serve Vizzerdix Burgers if that's what the customers want.

Al-Bahr City, Kahanistan

Al-Bahr General Hospital, Psychiatric Wing

Max Granwell, former President of Mystery Max, Inc. was sitting in a straitjacket, having made four attempts to kill himself in one day. Some former employees who were supportive of Mystery Max for its superior health policies vis-a-vis CBBC came to visit him.

One of them sat next to Granwell. "We want you to come back. Hundreds of people have gotten sick eating at CBBC. We might not know what's in your Mystery Meat, but at least we know what isn't in it... intestinal parasites, tapeworms, E. coli, E. bola..."

Granwell smiled sadly. "I can't... the Board of Directors sold me out. They just want to make money and they don't mind selling out to the Parthians to do it."

"But people's health is at stake, nobody ever got sick eating at Mystery Max. Didn't you hear what they do in Pacitalia? They don't even refrigerate the meat half the time? We could get CBBC shut down, and not have to worry about the treaty with Allanea. The Commerce Minister doesn't like CBBC, he doesn't have to get his hands dirty."

Granwell nodded. These people had given him what he needed to go on living. He turned his back, pointing out his straitjacket. One of the CBBC workers who had been hired from Mystery Max unfastened it. The older man walked up to the exit of his cell, and grabbed the two guards by the necks, slamming their heads together and knocking them out.

"Let's go," said Granwell.

---

Najaster, Capital of Kahanistan

Ministry of Health

Dr. Mohammed Kareem al-Qadala, the Minister of Health, sat at his desk. He had done little in the way of innovating policy since he had been appointed by President Valens to the spot. He had "earned" his position through his discoveries relating to Capitol Police, which he had built on the backs of his colleagues... literally, in the case of one scientist who had had her neck broken by one of the specimens in a very dangerous experiment and lost the use of her legs.

The tactics were ruthless, but al-Qadala was now the Health Minister, even if he preferred to use the title "Dr." rather than "Minister." So he was the one who Granwell's allies contacted about reports of employees defecating in the CBBC meat...

"WHAT?" the Health Minister asked. "Defecating?" So THAT's where the E. coli cases are coming from... Dr. al-Qadala had never had anything against CBBC, unlike Delray and McKimble.

He arranged for a surprise inspection of 500 of the worst health offenders in CBBC's Kahanistan branch...

Axis Nova News Network


"Today in Kaste, the first of several thousand "CBBC" franchises opened; it seems this new burger franchise will be competing with some of the locals, especially for the arcology market."

The Market Today, excerpts

In Brief:

... It is unknown whether Consortium will accept the new union proposal, but based on past actions, they may later threaten an upgrade in automation at their factories if the strikes make them financially impractical.

- The CBBC has set its sights on New Empire, according to representatives from major agribusinesses across New Empire. The fast-food giant, which already operates over a million outlets world wide, is rumored to be negotiating local contracts with businesses and investors in the UCSNE. Analysts expect CBBC to operate at least half a dozen stores per million people once they break into the market, though some doubt that the comparatively sluggish fast food industry in New Empire could see such quick growth.

- Sheffield Automata announced their new generation three carbon mainframe Monday, and already contracts with the government and other businesses are ...

Road Set For Fast Food's Speedy Arrival

FLURTHWEL -- The Viziery today confirmed that the Commerce Ministry are in talks with the Allanean fast-food conglomerate the Cute Bunny Burger Corporation, ending a week of speculation generated by the article in The Gruenberger Financial Times which first hinted at the possibility of the move. Full details of the business plan being discussed will not emerge until agreement has been reached, but it is widely thought that initial development will concentrate on the expanding urban and suburban populations of Gruenberg's major cities, with the possibility of further expansion after considerations of the success.

Speaking after the Sultan's daily announcements, Grand Vizier Mikkolic Weltin said that the agreement would be "a coup" for Gruenberg, and could "prove instrumental" in expanding the nation's trading links, one of the key aims of the present Sultan, His Grand High Holiness Gardab Woltzten IX, who was said to be "very excited indeed" at the prospect of having CBBC shops opening up in Gruenberg. The Grand Vizier also stressed that the CBBC would be making every effort to tailor their service to Gruenberg's needs - and ended fears by some by categorically stating that goat meat would not feature on the menu of Gruenberg's branches.

"The goat will remain our sacred animal," he said. There had been fears, believed to have been circulated by right-wing politicians seeking to discourage support for the move, that CBBC would serve goat, as the meat is on offer in other nations. The Grand Vizier said that he trusted CBBC directors to prepare suitable menus, and emphasised that the deal would also prove beneficial for local food producers, and good provide jobs in the manufacturing and catering sectors, which have seen slow growth in recent years.

Gruenberg's relationship with fast food was famously characterised by former Commerce Minister Hasibal Wonteg as "slow", and individual restaurants and cafes remain the norm, but it is believed CBBC should be able to find considerable custom in the nation. Their continuing impressive international growth has largely quieted the concerns of analysts fearing a 'burger boom'.

The talks also come as final drafts for a regional free trade agreement are being prepared in Antarctic Oasis, and as such is likely to be used as an example of the benefits of free trade when selling the agreement to the public. Popular reaction has been largely positive - indeed, it was a Citizens For Tasty Food Now! lobby group that first suggested the negotiations - but only time will tell whether CBBC can adapt to meet the high culinary demands of a nation famed for its varied and exotic dishes.

Official Cute Bunny Report

Good day, friends, Freemen, and Bunny-lovers, we're here, with another bout of good news. We have expanded majorly, with new branches in DontPissUsOff, ZMI, New Empire, Axis Nova and Gruenberg. Several employees in Kahanistan have been sacked trying to sabotage the food production process. But that doesn't matters - what matters is that the Bunny continues to grow, and it will continue to do so.

Good luck. And may the Sun never set on the Golden Bunny.

Detailed Status Report

Derscon - 113,824 branches
Liverpool England - 107,815 branches
Yukatania - 100,000 branches
Arizona Nova - 87,280 branches
The Parthians 106,000 branches
Juumanistra 70,000 branches
Crazed Marines 45,000 branches
Allanea - 80,300 branches
Gyrobot - 100,001 branches
Hamptonshire - 65,050 branches
The Macabees - 42,000 branches
Jeruselem - 40,000 branches
Praetonia - 40,000 branches
Bazalonia - 28,500 branches
Knootoss - 22,000 branches
Crna Gora Liv Eng - 14,185 branches
Conquest Inc -20,000 branches
Kahanistan - 13,500 branches
Van Luxembourg - 7,500 branches
Dersconi Haven Colonies - 15,000 branches
Hallad - 5,000 branches
Auman - 2,666 branches
Cherry Ridge - 3,500 branches
LifeWyze Facilities - 2,032 branches
Kanami - 1,500 branches
Psychotic Psychos - 1,000 branches
Otagia - 1,000 branches
Last Anarchy Order - 1,000 branches
Leafanistan - 800 branches
SuperAmerican VX Man - 700 branches
Zarustra - 500 branches
Callisdrun - 500 branches
Swilatia - 690 branches
Atheistic Right - 550 branches
Kirisubo - 300 branches
Rhominia - 200 branches
Pacitalia - 67 branches
Pantocratoria [unknown]
The Beltway - 150 branches
Democratic Colonies - 100 branches
Demotivated Dilberts - 100 branches
Communistic Governments - 100 branches
Menelmacar - 100 branches
Evitravrenoscia - 100 branches
Lame Bums - 6 branches
Rejistania - 5 branches
Billy Asko - 400 branches
The Territory - 100 branches
The Conglomerate - 100 branches
Casari 12000
Alcona and Hubris - 100 branches
Khenas - 100 branches
Grabinia - 100 branches
San Haven - 16 branches
Asgranieu - 6 branches
Aralonia - 6 branches
Milchama - 1 branch
TPM - 1 branch
Valeneska Republic - 100 branches
Roania 45
DontPissUsOff - 1,000 branches
Gruenberg - 1,000 branches
Axis Nova - 5,000 branches
ZMI 6
New Empire - 1,000 branches
ShopSmart FoodCourts - 6,000 branches
Maraque - 5000

Total Branches: 1,176,702

Revenue: 932.15 billion USD
Net Income: 119,5

Major Shareholders

Knyaz Xavier Andropov (Derscon) – 5%
Queen Mariah (Jeruselem) – 5%
King John Antonette (Cherry Ridge) – 5%
Rheinwurst: 05%
OmniGlobe, Incorporated – 5%
Former Mystery Max shareholders – 3.5%
Shah Kosru (The Parthians) – 2.5%.
Mike Kowalski (Crazed Marines) – 2.5%
Anonymous Owner 1 – 10%.


OOC: McKagan, so what about that terrorist thread idea?

Official Proclamation
Ministry of Commerce, Mer des Ennuis
It is with great pleasure that we bestow the honor to the Cute Bunny Burger Corporation permission to build restaurants in Mer des Ennuis. The Corporation is hereby aloud to build up to 10 restaurants in each major city of Mer des Ennuis, totaling 250 restaurants total. If the Cute Bunny Burger Corporation is willing to expend money to help reconstruct Ville des Lumieres, we will grant them subsidies for construction of up to three-quarters of the restaurants in our country. In addition, we will grant a 5% tax break on all transactions during the first year of operations.

Signed,
Maciej Navesky
Minister of Commerce

OOC: What happened to the 5,000 branches in Maraque?

OOC: McKagan, so what about that terrorist thread idea?

[OOC: You're free to do whatever you want - but take into considering all that I said in the OOC thread about "big" operations in McKagan.]

Omniglobe begins powerplay!

Omniglobe, one of CBBC's most powerful supporters has been on an corporate blitzkrieg to make gyrobot the spearhead of CBBC. They have also allowed a properous forest colony called Zeta IV to be not only the main supplier of rabbit game but also as a means to begin farming operations there as terraformers have made it favorable in other colonies to produce rabbit game and high quality crops for their food. Also foreign operations have began contracts with Shah Korshu in an attempt to buy its share of stock. Gyrobot aint gonna rest until they become CBBC's most loved client. In other news reports of McDonald shoestring fries has been released by omniglobe, McDonalds is now suing Omniglobe for attacking a truck convoy carrying their merchandise and selling it to the public in an attempt to push costumers away from their fast food products. We will have more as the story progresses.

OOC: Great RP!

RNN:

The department of Retail Commercial Industry is proud to announce the very first Cute Bunny Burger in the capitol City of Elru. They also add that the store will have Vizzerdrix burgers available on request. For those who don't remember, a Vizzerdrix is a six foot Carnivorus crssbread between a pirannah and a Rabbit.

This is alli kanhanzelflanzel, signing off.

OOC: Tiny thing, Allanea. You keep (seemingly) copy-pasting '05%' instead of '5%' for the percentage of CBBC stock owned by Rheinwürst. Just a heads up.

[OOC: Erm Allanea, are you sure that the Allanean Navy procurement thingofmejig is in the right thread? Isn't it supposed to be for Kriegzimmer?]

OOOC: Gah! I will fix it all! All!

Liverpool England to shut down more CBBC stalls: report
A report by an Environmental Health NGO in Liverpool England has suggested that the Liverpool England Health Ministry is looking at fining, warning and closing down more CBBC outlets.

CBBC, a growing brand in the world, has suffered major losses in Liverpool England after over 4000 of its branches were shut down and another 8000 or so warned or fined over poor health practices at the outlets. Of the 108,000 branches in Liverpool England currently operating, it is reported that at least 70,000 have reported finances in the red, and another 3,000 reporting a slipping income margin. However, in the Western Territory, all 19,000 branches have traded healthily in the black since their openings - and consumption is growing.

Should further branches be shut down in Liverpool England, it is expected that the Western Territory government will ask the federal authorities to open more shops in the territory. Crna Gora Liv Eng, two enclaves based totally within the WT's borders, and where 14,000 branches operate (12,500 reportedly well in the black, and the other 1,500 just about breaking even), is expected to request directly to the Allanean corporation to open another 6,000 stalls.

(OOC: Ally: please add 6,000 to CNG's total number of stalls...)

ZEITUNG KAPITALSTRASSE
Front Page

CBBC ATTACKED, DERSCON COMES TO THE RESCUE
______________________________________________

Finance Ministry, Rekjyavich-Andropov Military City As is typical with anything Allanean, the Cute Bunny Burger Corporation has suffered massive assaults from some members of the International Community for various reasons, causing stock prices to fall. Many investors are outraged at the overzalous crusade against the CBBC and Allanea, but most dismiss this as "typical Allaneaphobia" displayed by the members of the International Community.

In response to the attacks, the Tsar of Derscon has pledged support for any Allanean intervention into a nation, should more assaults on Allaneans continue.

"We will not abandon a Prussian ally when their citizens are in need of help," the Tsar was quoted as saying. "All citizens of Allanea are Prussian citizens as well, and will be protected by Greater Prussia."

However, a move by the Finanace Ministry was unprecidented in the speed of the decision and execution of the operation. The Dersconi government has bought out five thousand lots of land in both the Dersconi Althar colonies and the Dersconi Haven colonies, and is working with Andropov Petroleum and Beyond, as well as with CBBC to begin construction of a total of ten thousand facilities in the Dersconi colonies. Veliky Kynaz Xavier Andropov has stated the move was to show that "...Capitalism will always triumph, even in the face of war."

The Tsar has also stated that, as Arch-Chancellor and de facto Emperor of Greater Prussia, all Prussians are to avoid any sort of business with McKagan. While he has not called for an official Imperial Embargo, he is "strongly urging" Prussians cut off economic ties with the nation.

So, what does all of this have in store for us? Well, as CBBC is the best preforming fast food restauraunt in the Dersconi Empire, it means a lot more people are going to be happy with the Allanean supercorporation, and the CBBC is going to become a lot richer.

-::Dr. Blagomil Valentov

http://img375.imageshack.us/img375/2254/sbc29vj.gif

The cute bunny isgrowing even more popular. In Fact, now Shopsmart has a Cute bunny Burger Stand in every one of their food courts. And theres 800 branches in Swilatia. However we are excluding the Shopsmart Locations because Shopsmart is now a multinational corporation.

If trends continue, it may even surpass McRonald's and Henriksa on the Swilatian market. And there are now more than a million CBBC's in the world.

OOC: Swilatia, you've inspired me to make a logo. :)

OOC: Swilatia, you've inspired me to make a logo. :)
A logo for what?

A logo for what?

OOC: My newspaper and my other corporation.

CMN news update
Three of the victims of the CBBC food poisoning have died. Autopsy results are sketchy but reports indicate the presence of a man-made toxin delivered prior to consumption.

Detailed Status Report

Derscon - 113,824 branches
Liverpool England - 99,815 branches
Yukatania - 100,000 branches
Arizona Nova - 87,280 branches
The Parthians 206,000 branches
Juumanistra 80,000 branches
Crazed Marines 45,000 branches
Allanea - 90,300 branches
Gyrobot - 120,001 branches
Hamptonshire - 65,050 branches
The Macabees - 42,000 branches
Jeruselem - 40,000 branches
Praetonia - 40,000 branches
Bazalonia - 28,500 branches
Knootoss - 42,000 branches
Crna Gora Liv Eng - 22,185 branches
Conquest Inc -30,000 branches
Kahanistan - 13,500 branches
Van Luxembourg - 7,500 branches
Dersconi Haven Colonies - 15,000 branches
Hallad - 5,000 branches
Auman - 2,666 branches
Cherry Ridge - 3,500 branches
LifeWyze Facilities - 2,032 branches
Kanami - 1,500 branches
Psychotic Psychos - 1,000 branches
Otagia - 1,000 branches
Last Anarchy Order - 1,000 branches
Leafanistan - 800 branches
SuperAmerican VX Man - 700 branches
Zarustra - 500 branches
Callisdrun - 500 branches
Swilatia - 800 branches
Atheistic Right - 550 branches
Kirisubo - 300 branches
Rhominia - 200 branches
Pacitalia - 67 branches
Pantocratoria [unknown]
The Beltway - 150 branches
Democratic Colonies - 100 branches
Demotivated Dilberts - 100 branches
Communistic Governments - 100 branches
Menelmacar - 100 branches
Evitravrenoscia - 100 branches
Lame Bums - 6 branches
Rejistania - 5 branches
Billy Asko - 400 branches
The Territory - 100 branches
The Conglomerate - 100 branches
Casari 12000
Alcona and Hubris - 100 branches
Khenas - 100 branches
Grabinia - 100 branches
San Haven - 16 branches
Ri-An – 6 brances
Asgranieu - 6 branches
Aralonia - 6 branches
Milchama - 1 branch
TPM - 1 branch
Valeneska Republic - 100 branches
Roania 45
DontPissUsOff - 1,000 branches
Gruenberg - 1,000 branches
Axis Nova - 5,000 branches
ZMI 6
New Empire - 1,000 branches
ShopSmart FoodCourts - 6,000 branches
Maraque - 5000

Total Branches: 1,346,818

Revenue: 932.15 billion USD
Net Income: 119,5

Major Shareholders

Knyaz Xavier Andropov (Derscon) – 5%
Queen Mariah (Jeruselem) – 5%
King John Antonette (Cherry Ridge) – 5%
Rheinwurst: 5%
OmniGlobe, Incorporated – 5%
Former Mystery Max shareholders – 3.5%
Shah Kosru (The Parthians) – 2.5%.
Mike Kowalski (Crazed Marines) – 2.5%
Anonymous Owner 1 – 10%.


OOC:

ALL CBBC SHAREHOLDERS PLEASE TELEGRAM ME. I HAVE A BEAUTIFUL IDEA, ONE I ALREADY HINTED AT PREVIOUSLY

Gyrobot declares itself "CBBC's Favorite democratic customer"

Relations with Allanea and Gyrobot has entered an all time high. As well as business ties, foreign relations hit an all time high. To celebrate, Gyrobot Lenster proclaim today: "CBBC day" to commerate the day they outbuilt every other democratic government's number of CBB. In other news Gyrobot Branches now allows customers to tip the branches.

I would like to accept, but Curlingstan is a 1/2 muslim nation. Also, what are your views on obeseity.

OOC: hey Allanea, didn't you open some of these in Alutia? And on a seperate note, can I buy stock in CBBC?

OOC: Allanea, you can assume that the Althar branches are up and running

CMN NEWS
Ricin Was used to poison CBBC customers

Autopsy reports on ten of the seventeen dead and one hundred and fourteen hospitalized CBBC customers confirm that ricin was dropped in the food supply some time prior to cooking. It is unknown who the terrorist is but officials say leads are coming to a close as clues are being sifted through. CBBC sales and stock has been in a slump during this time in which officials say is an understandable due to this type crisis but affirm they none of this was anticipated and will be resolved in the harshest manner possible including firing the manager at the time of the incident and shutting down all stores in a ten mile radius.

http://i29.photobucket.com/albums/c275/bilkyasko/6INewsSmall.png
Late Evening News

Despite recent ricin posisoning in some CBBC branches, sales have boomed in Bilky Asko. The demand is outgrowing the restaurants, and the government have released a statment saying that they want the bracnhes to extend to 1 restaurant to every 1000 people. The population of the country has boomed and they think that every town should have a CBBC.
Due to rigorous checks on CBBC restaurants, ricin has been ruled out of being in Bilky Asko. This could also be because of the very low crime rate in Bilky Asko.
An interesting statistic has revealed that people that like BDSM are 10 times more likely to visit a CBBC restaurant in Bilky Asko. Officials from the government say they have "no idea" why this is.

OOC: If people wish to have station logos for news reports, please state OOC in this thread, thanks.
P.S., Allanea, you may want to sort out the order of your reports, they aren't sorted properly.

OOC: If people wish to have station logos for news reports, please state OOC in this thread, thanks.

OOC: Are you willing to make one for me?

Official Invitation of the Cute Bunny Burger Corporation

Dear Friends and Shareholders!

We would like to invite all of you – especially Knyaz Xavier Andropov, Queen Mariah, King John Antonette (Cherry Ridge), the CEOs of Rheinwurst, Ominglobe, Arion holdings, Shah Kosru, Mike Kowalski, and the other major shareholders, to a party in Liberty-City, to commemorate the breaking of the one-million-branch limit by the cute Bunny Burger Corporation.

The evening program will consist of several events:

1. First of all, a street party. We have already financed the purchase a large amount of wine, liquor, beer, and other such substances from the Greater Prussian Wine and Spirits company, which will be handed out on the street to all those desiring to participate. Further, artists of various kinds will be invited, to participate in a huge street party, the biggest to ever take place in Allanean history.

2. From every nation, award-winning CBBC employees and a large amount of lottery-winning customers will be flown to attend the party at our own expense.

3. A special parade will be held, to demonstrate the newest gear and men of the CBSF, the security branch of the Cute Bunny Burger Corporation.

4. For the main shareholders of the corporation, a quiet, special evening will be held – at the roof of the BunnyTower, looking out to Liberty City Harbor. This evening will be used not merely for the savoring of the best wine the Greater Prussian Wine and Spirits corporation has to offer, but to discuss further plans for the company’s expansion oversees, especially our plans for Greater Dienstadt and the Excalbian Isles regions.

Thank you for your attention –

And may the Sun never Set on the Golden Bunny.

Detailed Status Report

Derscon - 113,824 branches
Liverpool England - 99,815 branches
Yukatania - 100,000 branches
Arizona Nova - 87,280 branches
The Parthians 206,000 branches
Gyrobot - 200,001 branches
Allanea - 100,300 branches
Juumanistra 90,000 branches
Crazed Marines 45,000 branches
Hamptonshire - 65,050 branches
The Macabees - 42,000 branches
Jeruselem - 40,000 branches
Praetonia - 40,000 branches
Bazalonia - 28,500 branches
Knootoss - 42,000 branches
Crna Gora Liv Eng - 22,185 branches
Conquest Inc -30,000 branches
Kahanistan - 13,500 branches
Alutia – 10,000 branches
Van Luxembourg - 7,500 branches
Dersconi Haven Colonies - 15,000 branches
Dersconi Althar Colonies – 10,000 branches
Hallad - 5,000 branches
Auman - 3,666 branches
Cherry Ridge - 3,500 branches
LifeWyze Facilities - 2,032 branches
Kanami - 1,500 branches
Psychotic Psychos - 1,000 branches
Otagia - 1,000 branches
Last Anarchy Order - 1,000 branches
Leafanistan - 800 branches
SuperAmerican VX Man - 700 branches
Zarustra - 500 branches
Callisdrun - 500 branches
Swilatia - 800 branches
Atheistic Right - 550 branches
Kirisubo - 300 branches
Rhominia - 200 branches
Pacitalia - 67 branches
Pantocratoria [unknown]
The Beltway - 150 branches
Democratic Colonies - 100 branches
Demotivated Dilberts - 100 branches
Communistic Governments - 100 branches
Menelmacar - 100 branches
Evitravrenoscia - 100 branches
Lame Bums - 6 branches
Rejistania - 5 branches
Bilky Asko - 1400 branches
The Territory - 100 branches
The Conglomerate - 100 branches
Casari 12,000
Alcona and Hubris - 100 branches
Khenas - 100 branches
Grabinia - 100 branches
San Haven - 16 branches
Ri-An – 6 brances
Asgranieu - 6 branches
Aralonia - 6 branches
Milchama - 1 branch
TPM - 1 branch
Valeneska Republic - 100 branches
Roania – 45 branches
DontPissUsOff - 1,000 branches
Gruenberg - 1,000 branches
Axis Nova - 5,000 branches
ZMI – 6 branches
New Empire - 1,000 branches
ShopSmart FoodCourts - 6,000 branches
Maraque – 5,000 branches

Total Branches: 1,458,818

Major Shareholders

Knyaz Xavier Andropov (Derscon) – 5%
Queen Mariah (Jeruselem) – 5%
King John Antonette (Cherry Ridge) – 5%
Rheinwurst: 5%
OmniGlobe, Incorporated – 5%
Aerion Holdings – 5%
Former Mystery Max shareholders – 3.5%
Shah Kosru (The Parthians) – 2.5%.
Mike Kowalski (Crazed Marines) – 2.5%
Anonymous Owner 1 – 10%.
Richard/Mathilda Rabbit (founders, not likely to sell their stock): 50.1%

Special thread for the party RP is here (http://forums.jolt.co.uk/showthread.php?p=11117339)

OOC: Are you willing to make one for me?
OOC: i could make one.

OOC: Are you willing to make one for me?

OOC: Yes

Headline news from the Department of things no one really cares about:

No one has yet to get sick or die in Ri-an from eating at the Cute bunny burger. Could it be because of our strange alien genetics? we don't know. Some sources say its the tough regulations imposed by the Department of Public Safety.

Due to the raving success, The Ri-an Government has decided to invest a considerable sum of money from the Social Welfare budget to bring more branches into the nation.

From the Investor Times
Fraud in CBBC Annual Report
Recently reports have been circulating within the United Duchies that CBBC's latest Annual Report to its shareholders may well be erronous and perhaps even fradulent. This comes as some individuals veiwing the CBBC report noted the entry
Alcona and Hubris -100 branches
within the report. Considering Cute Bunny Burger's rather dismal sales within the United Duchies 100 branches seemed a high number to some analysists. Futher investigations showed that CBBC has all but twenty branches within the entire territory of the United Duchies. These are all either in major airports or on the continent of Zithril where Hassen are unknown.

With reports of this error, some have begun to wonder if CBBC is actually overstating their international pentration elsewhere and perhaps overstating earnings. Some question if the finanical records of CBBC have ever been properly audited at all.

Mike Kowalski knew he still held a lot of power in the CM government including the military and police branches. He sent a message to his police contacts, got a reply, and sent another on to CBBC Corprate HQ.

Just checked, your Spetznaz troopers, if they come in as "private military contractors" employed by me, will have full protection of the CM authorities when aiding the ricin investigation. Your help would be much appreciated and hopefully you nab the guy before we do.

Within days, the CBSF Special Operations Team was on the ground. Their first operation was to begin questioning of every employee of CBBC that was present on the job within three days of the poisoning. So far, they found only one suspicious detail: two of the temporary workers could no longer be found.

Detailed Status Report

Derscon - 113,824 branches
Liverpool England - 99,815 branches
Yukatania - 100,000 branches
Arizona Nova - 87,280 branches
The Parthians 206,000 branches
Gyrobot - 200,001 branches
Allanea - 100,300 branches
Juumanistra 90,000 branches
Crazed Marines 45,000 branches
Hamptonshire - 65,050 branches
The Macabees - 42,000 branches
Jeruselem - 60,000 branches
Questers - 60,000 branches
Praetonia - 40,000 branches
Bazalonia - 28,500 branches
Knootoss - 42,000 branches
Crna Gora Liv Eng - 22,185 branches
Conquest Inc -30,000 branches
Kahanistan - 13,500 branches
Alutia – 10,000 branches
Van Luxembourg - 7,500 branches
Dersconi Haven Colonies - 15,000 branches
Dersconi Althar Colonies – 10,000 branches
Hallad - 5,000 branches
Auman - 3,666 branches
Cherry Ridge - 3,500 branches
LifeWyze Facilities - 2,032 branches
Kanami - 1,500 branches
Psychotic Psychos - 1,000 branches
Otagia - 1,000 branches
Last Anarchy Order - 1,000 branches
Leafanistan - 800 branches
SuperAmerican VX Man - 700 branches
Zarustra - 500 branches
Callisdrun - 500 branches
Swilatia - 800 branches
Atheistic Right - 550 branches
Kirisubo - 300 branches
Rhominia - 200 branches
Pacitalia - 67 branches
Pantocratoria [unknown]
The Beltway - 150 branches
Democratic Colonies - 100 branches
Demotivated Dilberts - 100 branches
Communistic Governments - 100 branches
Menelmacar - 100 branches
Evitravrenoscia - 100 branches
Lame Bums - 6 branches
Rejistania - 5 branches
Bilky Asko - 1400 branches
The Territory - 100 branches
The Conglomerate - 100 branches
Casari 12,000
Ri-An –106 branches
Alcona and Hubris - 20 branches
Khenas - 100 branches
Grabinia - 100 branches
San Haven - 16 branches
Asgranieu - 6 branches
Aralonia - 6 branches
Milchama - 1 branch
TPM - 1 branch
Valeneska Republic - 100 branches
Roania – 45 branches
DontPissUsOff - 1,000 branches
Gruenberg - 1,000 branches
Axis Nova - 5,000 branches
ZMI – 6 branches
New Empire - 1,000 branches
ShopSmart FoodCourts - 6,000 branches
Maraque – 5,000 branches

Total Branches: 1,528,898

Major Shareholders

Knyaz Xavier Andropov (Derscon) – 5%
Queen Mariah (Jeruselem) – 5%
King John Antonette (Cherry Ridge) – 5%
Rheinwurst: 5%
OmniGlobe, Incorporated – 5%
Aerion Holdings – 5%
Former Mystery Max shareholders – 3.5%
Shah Kosru (The Parthians) – 2.5%.
Mike Kowalski (Crazed Marines) – 2.5%
Anonymous Owner 1 – 10%.
Richard/Mathilda Rabbit (founders, not likely to sell their stock): 50.1

OOC: Cannot post in detail now, so just updating as per requestes of various players. Alcona, it would be nice if people inform me, via telegram, of such things. Generally though, I think CBBC will take some loss [miniature as it is vs. their insane income – to maintain a mere presence in your nation.

OOC: Ah well I was mearly capping off my loose part of this thread really. CBB winds up like so many fast food joints RL with just a smattering of places across the country in the end. Anyway you've go a poisoning case to worry about.

[Wire Report]
CBBC Restates Annual Report
CBBC restated both earnings and quarterly results after questions arose about CBBC statments within the report especially with regard to branches within the United Duchies.

The modifications it appears were minor and the overall growth and income of the company apparently were very close to the orginally reported numbers.

Some worry does occur about who is going to audit these reports in the future, but at the moment it appears shareholders did not panic when rumors of the problems with the inital report were made public.

Akmhed Dizoul was on the run. He was an ostrich meat deliveryman and had enough against the CM peoples to have poisoned htem. His grandfather, father, and brothers both were killed for their faith in a massacre fifteen years before, a faith that was long outlawed. He had sided with the Iwo Jima seperatists, fought with them ten years earlier, and was now reaking his own revenge on Crazed Marines. It just happened what he wanted coincided with what the Tratains wanted.

The Sensible Economist, Page 12

Malicious Meals from CBBC? I think not.

Editor's Note: This is an op-ed piece and in no way reflects the beliefs or ideals of The Sensible Economist.

With a rash of food poisoning episodes and a recent epidemic of a new seemingly non coliform disease in Kahanistan, how viable can the Cute Bunny Burger Corporation's resturants be?

Already many have closed, including 2 in Leafanistan over food poisoning scares and lack of customers. While the CBBC has reassured consumers that these are isolated incidents the sheer number of them and consistency of its episodes seems almost intelligently planned.

While this phrasing seems to lend value to creationism, we believe somebody besides God is up to something. In our neighbor McKagan the unusually strong youth grunge movement killed dozens as it drove out CBBC, but could this be part of a larger operation by youth terrorists? I believe not, the lack of government interference in a simple youth movement, and seemingly government support for the terrorist youth make it plasuable that a government is involved.

The CBBC has come under fire for its seemingly monopolistic practices and its militarism including rumours of black market gun deals to arm guards and employees in foreign countries. Perhaps those unsympathetic to this corporation are unleashing something deadly upon those who feast at its resturants.

Many including the author find that this idea is absolutely ludicrous but entirely plausably considering the strength of some of the operations against CBBC. It is the opinion of this author that the epidemic of food poisoning outbreaks from CBBC resturants and lack of concurrent outbreaks at similar establishments means a direct attack against them. But is it worth it to slaughter innocents trying to get a cheap meal, perhaps a Joe Dawson just trying to get his kids to shut up, Lixin Wo a bum with nothing else to eat, or just Jenny Ledwidge from down the lane spending her allowance. How can anyone be deluded enough to believe that the death of these people is worth it, just to put a dent in someone's fiscal dreams? I lay awake at night hoping, dreaming that what I believe is wrong, but based on the evidence, I may just be right. Only the large resources of a government are capable of launching such an epidemic. So Biological Warfare against those who want a Cute Bunny Burger?

Have we left the age of reason and descended into insanity, similar to that of the Red Brigade which slaughtered thousands for their ideals, or the Global Jihad movement which murdered millions in the end for their 'God', but this time sponsored by 'righteous' governments. Those with violent anti-CBBC rethoric are just as evil as the Red Brigade, just as evil as Global Jihad, and are just serial killers, but this time with well spoken words and a fancy suit.

I probably won't be the last to accuse McKagan and other governments like theirs of complacency and possibly direct actions against CBBC via terrorist attacks on the populace. If I die an unnatural death, assume they have gotten me, perhaps my death will not be in vain. If you'll excuse me, I must purchase a rather large insurance policy.

By: Alice Gunther, owner and proprietor of a Cute Bunny Burger Corporation Franchise in Konica City.

OOC: 2 resturants have closed in Leafanistan after fears of food poisoning.

McKagan Government Fights Media Paranoia

Kurora, McKagan [CSHR] -- With the recent outbreak of an unidentified virus in Kahanistan driving up paranoia about the safety of meat and fast food in general, one must ask themself why McKagan gets blame for every incident surrounding the CBBC. It has became apparent that there is a vast international conspiracy to not only hide the health risks of cheap industrial meat, but to assault the credit of the McKagan government. To be a nation which has brought freedom and economic upturn to at least half-a-dozen nations and helped even more deal with terrorists: McKagan sure seems to have alot of enemies. Perhaps there's a level of jealousy that the McKagan government has held itself together without a civl war or wide scale social panic for the existance of the nation? Perhaps yet another Christian conspiracy against the blatantly antheist McKagan government is in swing again?

Recently we were given unhindered access to several McKagan Government Officials who we spent a total of 18 hours in interviews with.

The comments we recieved at the McKagan Imperial State Department were more official and low-key than we would have liked, but still within the scale of what we expected. "May the Democratic Imperium of McKagan be the first nation to offer condolences to the nation of Kahanistan for whatever has been going on there. Right now we cannot comment directly to Kahanistan to any great extent simply because that government hasn't released many details as to the details of the investigation."

When we questioned them about their reaction to the harsh, uncalled for, and blatantly unresearched comments directed at this nation from Leafanistan: they remained low-key. "We don't know how the crack reporters out of Leafanistan can come to such conclusions about McKagan. Right now there hasn't even been enough details released to determine just what the infection circulating through the food supply is."


After some conversation and more in depth reporting at the State Department, we walked across the street to the McKagan Tactical Defense Force's headquarters.

"Let me get this straight... McKagan is killing people because we don't like their food? This is fucking retarded. Those damn CBBC people have such ego's. They can't accept the fact that someone might not like their food. There's also signs of unrest within their own structure. I know that the MTDF has a great reputation and success record, but I don't know if we could carry out an attack that large without either inside help or someone finding out."

After a few minutes of looking at the pistols in the Generals collection, we moved on to his opinion of where the agent could have came from if it wasn't a naturally occuring substance.

"Well, I don't really know. I'm not making speculation because the Kahanistani government hasn't released details, but I know that there's plenty of biological agents and people willing to deploy them on the market. There's millions of nations in the world today. Many of them aren't as singular and organized as McKagan. There's also plenty of states out there that were once superpowers, like Leafanistan for example, who collapsed due to corruption. It's a known fact in military circles that Leafanistan once had a huge surplus of biological and chemical weapons. They also have an overactive Mafia that the government neglects to deal against. It would take very little to lift a good surplus out of there. And not just Leafanistan. There's plenty of nations out there like this."

At this point we were enjoying chatting with the 2 Star General, but we needed to get across town to meet with several agents who claimed to have information on the disappearance of a pork shipment off the coast of McKagan last week. We had time for one last question. We decided to make it a good one.

"What do you think about allgations McKagan was part of this from a place like LEAFANISTAN?"

"I find it more than hilarious that someone can link McKagan to this. We've had a full... what, 2 sentences from the Kahanistani government? They're filling in so much information to try and hit it big and get some coverage that they just look unprofessional in the first place. It's nothing more than a corporate scheme, really. I heard that the State Department had put out a memo that we're not supposed to talk about foreign media very much. I don't really care. It's laughable and I won't take it that serious. Tell them they can ask for economic assistance if they really need it. McKagan has a history of helping Leafanistan."

Reacting to the outbreaks of an unknown disease in Kahanistan, the Ministry of Health shut down 1,200 CBBC outlets and cited another 3,700 for gross violations of Kahanistanian health codes.

The Health Ministry also discovered an unusual virus in the living and dead bodies of animals at CBBC farms, suggesting that someone, or some group, infected the animals with a biological weapon. In the meantime, the death toll has risen to 46, with 12,000 patients still in hospitals in various conditions as a result of eating at CBBC. They responded by slaughtering over 80% of the animals at the farms.

The origin of the disease was the subject of much speculation and theory. A spokesman for the Fascist Party, Dr. Mohammed al-Bashir, blamed Amestrian agents.

"The Amestrians have long hated Allanea and the Cute Bunny Burger Corporation. Further," the Fascist added, holding a copy of On the Amestrians and their Lies (http://ns.goobergunch.net/wiki/index.php/On_the_Amestrians_and_their_Lies) over his head, "they are an imperialist nation attempting to destabilize us so they can take us over."

A Kahanistanian Nazi representative disagreed. "This is clearly a plot of the mud races to destroy Kahanistan," said Lt. Gen. Josef Horowitz (Imperial Marines, Ret.), ignoring the fact that the disease did not discriminate between "mud races" and "pure races."

"However, as a precaution, we should expel the Allaneans from Kahanistan. They are buying out our wholesome, healthy food outlets such as Mystery Max, and replacing it with plainly unhealthy CBBC food not fit for even the blackest of savages."

The moderate right, and the mainstream Kahanistanian political climate, view both claims as extremist, divisive, and paranoid. Kahanistanian President Marcellus Valens, no friend of the Amestrian State himself, condemned the "exploitation of these tragic deaths and illnesses by far right wing elements to foster their doctrines of hate."

The President added, "The government is doing what it can to stem the tide of this outbreak, and we will not allow politics or hatred to sidetrack the government from protecting the people."

However, not all of the hostile speculation came from the far-right. Elements of the Communist party blamed MassPwnage and Doomingsland, who had attacked Kahanistan politically (militarily in the case of MassPwnage) as communist heathens. Kahanistanian CBBC owners accused their competition, who was mad about being bought out. In fact, Granwell had bought some weapons to take care of the directors who had sold out Mystery Max, but that wasn't widely known.

OOC: I love how you gave the Nazi a jewish last name (Horowitz). the thing is I know a couple of jews who have that last name...lol

Official Press Release of the Cute Bunny Corporation

Today, the Corporation is forced to respond to harsh criticism regarding the condition of our stores in Kahanistan. As of now, it is unknown to us what the purpose of the disease that has so affected our food and customers is, however, we will take harsh action regarding this food.

First of all, we will purchase farms throughout Kahanistan, to establish an independent source of raw material for our production of the Cute Bunny Burgers. This will, however, take time. As such, we will take up an unprecedented step further:

We would request all franchisees of the CBBC corporation, and all CBBC-owned branches, to stop using Kahanistan made meat. Meat will henceforth be imported from Allanea on secure refrigerator tankers, to fully eliminate the possibility of disease. We will shoulder the cost difference of this, until such a time that the new farms, under full CBBC control of quality of product will be established.

Furthermore, we request the permission from the Kahanistani government to deploy 500 armed CBSF personnel in the harbors where the beef will be unloaded, to protect it from interference.

We will further have the beef inspected upon arrival by the Kahanistani government, and only beef affirmed by the Kahanistani government, a mullah, and two rabbis (a Sefardic and Ashkenazi one) will be allowed to be used in Kahanistan.

Further, all storage facilities of the beef, and all CBBC kitchens in Kahanistan will be constantly monitored by webcam arrangements, which any concerned citizen will be able to view, and alert us to health violations by our employees or anybody else.

Thank you all,

And may the Sun never set on the Golden Bunny.

Detailed Status Report

Derscon - 113,824 branches
Liverpool England - 99,815 branches
Yukatania - 100,000 branches
Arizona Nova - 87,280 branches
The Parthians 206,000 branches
Gyrobot - 200,001 branches
Allanea - 110,300 branches
Juumanistra 100,000 branches
Crazed Marines 45,000 branches
Hamptonshire - 65,050 branches
The Macabees - 42,000 branches
Jeruselem - 60,000 branches
Questers - 60,000 branches
Praetonia - 40,000 branches
Bazalonia - 28,500 branches
Knootoss - 42,000 branches
Crna Gora Liv Eng - 22,185 branches
Conquest Inc -30,000 branches
Kahanistan - 12,300 branches
Alutia – 10,000 branches
Van Luxembourg - 7,500 branches
Dersconi Haven Colonies - 15,000 branches
Dersconi Althar Colonies – 10,000 branches
Hallad - 5,000 branches
Auman - 3,666 branches
Cherry Ridge - 3,500 branches
LifeWyze Facilities - 2,032 branches
Kanami - 1,500 branches
Psychotic Psychos - 1,000 branches
Otagia - 1,000 branches
Last Anarchy Order - 1,000 branches
Leafanistan - 798 branches
SuperAmerican VX Man - 700 branches
Zarustra - 500 branches
Callisdrun - 500 branches
Swilatia - 800 branches
Atheistic Right - 550 branches
Kirisubo - 300 branches
Rhominia - 200 branches
Pacitalia - 67 branches
Pantocratoria [unknown]
The Beltway - 150 branches
Democratic Colonies - 100 branches
Demotivated Dilberts - 100 branches
Communistic Governments - 100 branches
Menelmacar - 100 branches
Evitravrenoscia - 100 branches
Lame Bums - 6 branches
Rejistania - 5 branches
Bilky Asko - 1400 branches
The Territory - 100 branches
The Conglomerate - 100 branches
Casari 12,000
Ri-An –106 branches
Alcona and Hubris - 20 branches
Khenas - 100 branches
Grabinia - 100 branches
San Haven - 16 branches
Asgranieu - 6 branches
Aralonia - 6 branches
Milchama - 1 branch
TPM - 1 branch
Valeneska Republic - 100 branches
Roania – 45 branches
DontPissUsOff - 1,000 branches
Gruenberg - 1,000 branches
Axis Nova - 5,000 branches
ZMI – 6 branches
New Empire - 1,000 branches
ShopSmart FoodCourts - 6,000 branches
Maraque – 5,000 branches

Total Branches: 1,547,696

Major Shareholders

Knyaz Xavier Andropov (Derscon) – 5%
Queen Mariah (Jeruselem) – 5%
King John Antonette (Cherry Ridge) – 5%
Rheinwurst: 5%
OmniGlobe, Incorporated – 5%
Aerion Holdings – 5%
Former Mystery Max shareholders – 3.5%
Shah Kosru (The Parthians) – 2.5%.
Mike Kowalski (Crazed Marines) – 2.5%
Anonymous Owner 1 – 10%.
Richard/Mathilda Rabbit (founders, not likely to sell their stock): 50.1

The Kahanistanian government has no objection to the deployment of armed CBSF personnel, as gun laws in Kahanistan are almost as liberal as those in Allanea.

The Health Ministry stations personnel at the harbor in Kahanistan, to inspect meat coming from Allanea.