NationStates Jolt Archive

You have been kidnapped by nondescript extremists and placed in their dungeon of evilness. You are given a chance to escape, and are given a choice of four of these items to take with you:

3m long rope.
Matches.
Mouldy block of cheese.
Rusty hacksaw.
Can of whipped cream.
A barbie doll, minus head.
A compact disc labelled "Greatest Hits of the 80s: Volume Three"
An empty glass, to be filled with a random nondescript fluid.
A broomstick.
A slightly worn "I heart NY" T-shirt
A map of Warsaw city center, written in Polish.
A torch. (flashlight)
Two AA Batteries.
A remote controlled car.
A book about advanced calculus.
A permanent marker.

You must escape these three rooms within 6 hours:

ROOM A:

It contains a suspiciously soiled matress on the ground, and a small grate near the ceiling allows a tiny amount of light to filter through. The grate isn't large enough to squeeze through, but you could fit an arm through if you could reach and one of the bars were removed, somehow. The walls are slimy and moss covered, and the same is true of the floor. The cobblestones in the floor are somewhat loose, and with no small effort, you could probably remove one, but it would make some noise. A small pit in the corner contains stuff you probably don't want to know about. A wooden door leads to the next room.

ROOM B:

There is a pool in the middle - it is impossible to tell how deep it is. Aside from a small, unsafe looking moss covered ledge along the left side of the room, it is blocking your path. Several small creatures scurry around in the dark, pausing to nibble on the small clumps of fungi on the edge of the pool. There are some tree roots hanging down from the natural rock ceiling, and a small column of light pierces through a hairline crack in it - this is more detrimental than anything, though, as the bright light coming from this opening isn't enough to light the room and the contrast prevents your eyes from adjusting properly to the dark. The doorway at the opposite end of the room looks to be made of rusty iron.

ROOM C:

This massive cavernous room contains a gigantic dinner table, with seats and cutlery, set up as if awaiting a banquet - there appears to be food present on the table, but lids cover the plates, so exactly what is being served is unknown to you. Candelebras in the roof provide adequate lighting. A sign next to the door you entered says "please remove shoes." A fishtank with some exotic looking fish is on one side of the room, and on the other, an extremely large and excessively strong looking man stands in front of the exit, blocking your path. He stares ahead blankly and doesn't seem to pay attention to your presence.


So, how do you escape the dungeon? To begin with, tell me which items you are choosing, and one room at a time please. You may progress through one action at a time, or through outlining your entire intended set of actions in the room at once. And remember - this is my dungeon, and I make the rules. None of this "door is made of crumbly plywood" stuff. ;)

First to escape all three rooms wins....something.

How long is the rope? I was thinking of tying the calculus book to the rope and dropping it in the water, to test the depth of the pool in room B.

Also, are the doors locked?

Is this one of those trick puzzles? Room A: open the wooden door. Room B: open the rusty door. Room C: walk past/crawl under the person who isn't paying attention to you.

How long is the rope? I was thinking of tying the calculus book to the rope and dropping it in the water, to test the depth of the pool in room B.

Clever, but you're not out of room 1 yet. ;)

But good question - we'll say it's three meters long.

Is this one of those trick puzzles? Room A: open the wooden door. Room B: open the rusty door. Room C: walk past/crawl under the person who isn't paying attention to you.

Nah.

You have been kidnapped by nondescript extremists and placed in their dungeon of evilness. You are given a chance to escape, and are given a choice of four of these items to take with you:

Rope.
Matches.
Mouldy block of cheese.
Rusty hacksaw.
Can of whipped cream.
A barbie doll, minus head.
A compact disc labelled "Greatest Hits of the 80s: Volume Three"
An empty glass, to be filled with a random nondescript fluid.
A broomstick.
A slightly worn "I heart NY" T-shirt
A map of Warsaw city center, written in Polish.
A torch.
Two AA Batteries.
A remote controlled car.
A book about advanced calculus.
A permanent marker.

You must escape these three rooms within 6 hours:

ROOM A:

It contains a suspiciously soiled matress on the ground, and a small grate near the ceiling allows a tiny amount of light to filter through. The grate isn't large enough to squeeze through, but you could fit an arm through if you could reach and one of the bars were removed, somehow. The walls are slimy and moss covered, and the same is true of the floor. The cobblestones in the floor are somewhat loose, and with no small effort, you could probably remove one, but it would make some noise. A small pit in the corner contains stuff you probably don't want to know about. A wooden door leads to the next room.

ROOM B:

There is a pool in the middle - it is impossible to tell how deep it is. Aside from a small, unsafe looking moss covered ledge along the left side of the room, it is blocking your path. Several small creatures scurry around in the dark, pausing to nibble on the small clumps of fungi on the edge of the pool. There are some tree roots hanging down from the natural rock ceiling, and a small column of light pierces through a hairline crack in it - this is more detrimental than anything, though, as the bright light coming from this opening isn't enough to light the room and the contrast prevents your eyes from adjusting properly to the dark. The doorway at the opposite end of the room looks to be made of rusty iron.

ROOM C:

This massive cavernous room contains a gigantic dinner table, with seats and cutlery, set up as if awaiting a banquet - there appears to be food present on the table, but lids cover the plates, so exactly what is being served is unknown to you. Candelebras in the roof provide adequate lighting. A sign next to the door you entered says "please remove shoes." A fishtank with some exotic looking fish is on one side of the room, and on the other, an extremely large and excessively strong looking man stands in front of the exit, blocking your path. He stares ahead blankly and doesn't seem to pay attention to your presence.


So, how do you escape the dungeon? Tell me which items you are choosing, and one room at a time please. You may progress through one action at a time, or through outlining your entire intended set of actions in the room at once.

First to escape all three rooms wins....something.

I choose Kanabia's boredom, thereby making all the dungeon walls blow out instantly by its sheer volume. Then I simply walk out. :)

So, what do I win? :p

Clever, but you're not out of room 1 yet. ;)

But good question - we'll say it's three meters long.Would I be able to test how sharp the hacksaw is? If it seems sharp enough, I imagine I'd try to saw through the wooden door.

I choose Kanabia's boredom, thereby making all the dungeon walls blow out instantly by its sheer volume. Then I simply walk out. :)

So, what do I win? :p

Unfortunately, the roof remains, falls upon your head, and crushes you into a goo with all of the consistency of your average stool sample.

Try again. :p

Would I be able to test how sharp the hacksaw is? If it seems sharp enough, I imagine I'd try to saw through the wooden door.

It's probably sharp enough to do that, but it's in such poor condition that it may break. It's your call, though.

Are we to assume all the doors are locked and there are no keys hidden in a rat or pool of filth or anything?

You have been kidnapped by nondescript extremists and placed in their dungeon of evilness. You are given a chance to escape, and are given a choice of four of these items to take with you:

Rope.
Matches.
Mouldy block of cheese.
Rusty hacksaw.
Can of whipped cream.
A barbie doll, minus head.
A compact disc labelled "Greatest Hits of the 80s: Volume Three"
An empty glass, to be filled with a random nondescript fluid.
A broomstick.A slightly worn "I heart NY" T-shirt
A map of Warsaw city center, written in Polish.
A torch.
Two AA Batteries.
A remote controlled car.
A book about advanced calculus.
A permanent marker.

I wisely choose the bolded items.

You must escape these three rooms within 6 hours:

ROOM A:

It contains a suspiciously soiled matress on the ground, and a small grate near the ceiling allows a tiny amount of light to filter through. The grate isn't large enough to squeeze through, but you could fit an arm through if you could reach and one of the bars were removed, somehow. The walls are slimy and moss covered, and the same is true of the floor. The cobblestones in the floor are somewhat loose, and with no small effort, you could probably remove one, but it would make some noise. A small pit in the corner contains stuff you probably don't want to know about. A wooden door leads to the next room.

I go through the wooden door into the next room, wielding the broomstick and threateningly waving around the 80's CD to scare any possible attackers.

ROOM B:

There is a pool in the middle - it is impossible to tell how deep it is. Aside from a small, unsafe looking moss covered ledge along the left side of the room, it is blocking your path. Several small creatures scurry around in the dark, pausing to nibble on the small clumps of fungi on the edge of the pool. There are some tree roots hanging down from the natural rock ceiling, and a small column of light pierces through a hairline crack in it - this is more detrimental than anything, though, as the bright light coming from this opening isn't enough to light the room and the contrast prevents your eyes from adjusting properly to the dark. The doorway at the opposite end of the room looks to be made of rusty iron.

Well, there's no-one here, looks like the 80's CD wasn't needed. I take the suspicious bottle of water and drink it. :eek: It's Alice in Wonderland style, and it's labelled "Drink Me"! I shrink to rat size and follow the rats into the final room...

ROOM C:

This massive cavernous room contains a gigantic dinner table, with seats and cutlery, set up as if awaiting a banquet - there appears to be food present on the table, but lids cover the plates, so exactly what is being served is unknown to you. Candelebras in the roof provide adequate lighting. A sign next to the door you entered says "please remove shoes." A fishtank with some exotic looking fish is on one side of the room, and on the other, an extremely large and excessively strong looking man stands in front of the exit, blocking your path. He stares ahead blankly and doesn't seem to pay attention to your presence.

Somehow, I've grown a little more closer to normal size, but I still look like a Lolita. Never mind, the strong man seems to have a fetish for young girls, and I seduce him into letting me out with a little whipped cream bribary. ;)

Yay! Free from the minions of Kanabia! ^_^

Are we to assume all the doors are locked and there are no keys hidden in a rat or pool of filth or anything?

They may or may not be. The doors may not be the only way out of the rooms. You know no more than what you see until you attempt to escape and other details become apparent.

It's probably sharp enough to do that, but it's in such poor condition that it may break. It's your call, though.I suppose I'll have to try that. Then I'll use the rope and book as I said and check the depth of the pool. If it seems shallow enough, I'll jump in and try to search the bottom for the key to the door of room B. Once in room C, I'll jam one of the legs of the headless Barbie in the eye of the guard to kill him, steal his keys (assuming he has them) and exit the door.

I go through the wooden door into the next room, wielding the broomstick and threateningly waving around the 80's CD to scare any possible attackers.

You attempt to crash through the wooden door, but fail. Ouch! That's going to leave a nasty bruise.

Try again.

I suppose I'll have to try that. Then I'll use the rope and book as I said and check the depth of the pool. If it seems shallow enough, I'll jump in and try to search the bottom for the key to the door of room B. Once in room C, I'll jam one of the legs of the headless Barbie in the eye of the guard to kill him, steal his keys (assuming he has them) and exit the door.

You attack the door with your rusty hacksaw for some two hours, and you seem to be hardly getting anywhere - are you sure you want to keep this up? Your arms are starting to hurt. Maybe you've sufficiently weakened it enough to break through, now. Or maybe not.

This sounds like something out of a text-based adventure game I played about 15 years ago called Humbug. It were proper weird.

Anyway.

First room: open the door and walk through.

You attempt to crash through the wooden door, but fail. Ouch! That's going to leave a nasty bruise.

Try again.

I don't like your mean game. *Cries* :(

You attack the door with your rusty hacksaw for some two hours, and you seem to be hardly getting anywhere - are you sure you want to keep this up? Your arms are starting to hurt. Maybe you've sufficiently weakened it enough to break through, now. Or maybe not.I imagine I'd have to try breaking through, at that point.

This sounds like something out of a text-based adventure game I played about 15 years ago called Humbug. It were proper weird.

That was the idea, pretty much. :p

Anyway.

First room: open the door and walk through.

The handle fails to turn. The door is locked.

I imagine I'd have to try breaking through, at that point.

As you attempt to crash through the door, a large splinter lodges itself in your shoulder. With a couple more tries, you are through, but now your shoulder is bleeding moderately and you have difficulty moving your right arm.

You have 2 hours and 45 minutes of time remaining to escape.

As you test the water, it appears to be only a meter (around three feet) or so deep, but testing another spot seems to show it as a bit deeper. The surface underwater seems to be a bit uneven. Do you wish to enter the pool? How will you do so?

I don't like your mean game. *Cries* :(

You can always try again. :p

That was the idea, pretty much. :p
I'll judge its weirdness in a little bit. Once you've introduced a tea caddy-wielding clockwork shark, a viking ship, a pink furry wumpus holding a polaroid and a zoot suit-wearing aardvark, asleep on a washing machine. That's when it reaches 'proper weird'.



The handle fails to turn. The door is locked.
Bugger. Are you sure?

You can always try again. :p

Don't wanna! *Pouts* :(

I'll judge its weirdness in a little bit. Once you've introduced a tea caddy-wielding clockwork shark, a viking ship, a pink furry wumpus holding a polaroid and a zoot suit-wearing aardvark, asleep on a washing machine. That's when it reaches 'proper weird'.

OK, I was thinking more Zork style rather than completely batshit. :p

Bugger. Are you sure?

Yes. Either that, or the handle has become rusted on the inside.

(and which four items did you pick?)

First of all: I re-soil that matress just so that the next prisoner knew I meant business.

A few more questions: is the door made of solid wood, or is there an opening of some kind in it? Does it have a keyhole? Also, does the torch work?

OK, I was thinking more Zork style rather than completely batshit. :p



Yes. Either that, or the handle has become rusted on the inside.

(and which four items did you pick?)
I didn't bother. I was hoping that both doors would be unlocked, and the guard at the end wouldn't care if you escaped.

First of all: I re-soil that matress just so that the next prisoner knew I meant business.

Done. The mattress is now completely ruined.

Which four items do you pick?

As you attempt to crash through the door, a large splinter lodges itself in your shoulder. With a couple more tries, you are through, but now your shoulder is bleeding moderately and you have difficulty moving your right arm.Huzzah! I'm the first to make it through the first door!

You have 2 hours and 45 minutes of time remaining to escape.

As you test the water, it appears to be only a meter (around three feet) or so deep, but testing another spot seems to show it as a bit deeper. The surface underwater seems to be a bit uneven. Do you wish to enter the pool? How will you do so?Yes, I'll enter. I'll go in feet first at the part where it's three feet deep. I'll search the bottom there for keys, or anything else, before heading to the deeper parts. Before I go deeper, I will again test the depths with the rope and book.
I will also search for underwater tunnels out of the room in the process.

Unfortunately, the roof remains, falls upon your head, and crushes you into a goo with all of the consistency of your average stool sample.

Try again. :p

Cheater! You know the roof would have been blown to atom-sized pieces. :p

Anyway, in this case I'll choose

- the rusty hacksaw
- the map of Warsaw city center, written in Polish
- the mouldy block of cheese
- the permanent marker


1) First, I screw on the top of the permanent marker real good.
Then, I use the rusty hacksaw to saw through the wooden door. Turns out the door is rickety one-sheet plywood, crumbly from age and the "rust" on the hacksaw isn't rust at all but dried blood covering a brandnew heavy duty saw. Why, how convenient. :)

2) I walk alongside the pool, using the hacksaw to scrape off the slippery moss on the ledge, and get across without any problems.
On the other side of the room, I place the mouldy block of cheese in a corner of the doorway, knock on the iron door and take out my map of Warsaw city center, written in Polish.

3) When the extremely large and excessively strong looking man comes to open the door and points to the sign, I take off my shoes, smile, point at the map, and ask him how for the way to the Louvre.

4) He informs me that unfortunately he doesn't speak Polish either but he's sure the Louvre has to be somewhere in the Old Town, then excuses himself to go back to the exit on the other side of the room.
He stops to sniff the air, looks at me accusingly, mumbles something that sounds like "Not again. I hate this fucking job." and asks me to please put my shoes back on already.

5) I put my shows back on and, apologetically, say he should just change the sign to say "please do not remove shoes" in order to avoid future olfactory incidents. He is taken by the idea but doesn't have a permanent marker to write on the sign with.

6) I give him my permanent marker, and while he arduously pries it open and starts to write on the sign, I have more than enough time to nonchalantly walk over to the exit and out of the dungeon.


Voilà. :)

Cheater! You know the roof would have been blown to atom-sized pieces. :p

Anyway, in this case I'll choose

- the rusty hacksaw
- the map of Warsaw city center, written in Polish
- the mouldy block of cheese
- the permanent marker


1) First, I screw on the top of the permanent marker real good.
Then, I use the rusty hacksaw to saw through the wooden door. Turns out the door is rickety one-sheet plywood, crumbly from age and the "rust" on the hacksaw isn't rust at all but dried blood covering a brandnew heavy duty saw. Why, how convenient. :)

2) I walk alongside the pool, using the hacksaw to scrape off the slippery moss on the ledge, and get across without any problems.
On the other side of the room, I place the mouldy block of cheese in a corner of the doorway, knock on the iron door and take out my map of Warsaw city center, written in Polish.

3) When the extremely large and excessively strong looking man comes to open the door and points to the sign, I take off my shoes, smile, point at the map, and ask him how for the way to the Louvre.

4) He informs me that unfortunately he doesn't speak Polish either but he's sure the Louvre has to be somewhere in the Old Town, then excuses himself to go back to the exit on the other side of the room.
He stops to sniff the air, looks at me accusingly, mumbles something that sounds like "Not again. I hate this fucking job." and asks me to please put my shoes back on already.

5) I put my shows back on and, apologetically, say he should just change the sign to say "please do not remove shoes" in order to avoid future olfactory incidents. He is taken by the idea but doesn't have a permanent marker to write on the sign with.

6) I give him my permanent marker, and while he arduously pries it open and starts to write on the sign, I have more than enough time to nonchalantly walk over to the exit and out of the dungeon.


Voilà. :)
Genius. :D

I pick none of the above and instead, seduce the guards! :p

A few more questions: is the door made of solid wood, or is there an opening of some kind in it? Does it have a keyhole? Also, does the torch work?

It's solid polished wood. There is a keyhole. And there is nothing wrong with the torch itself.

I didn't bother. I was hoping that both doors would be unlocked, and the guard at the end wouldn't care if you escaped.

Well, i'll be generous and let you re-choose.

Yes, I'll enter. I'll go in feet first at the part where it's three feet deep. I'll search the bottom there for keys, or anything else, before heading to the deeper parts. Before I go deeper, I will again test the depths with the rope and book.
I will also search for underwater tunnels out of the room in the process.

You slide your foot in, and whilst the surface on the bottom is rough, the water temperature is actually comfortably (and surprisingly) warm. Well, time to search the bottom. How do you wish to do so?

You have been kidnapped by nondescript extremists and placed in their dungeon of evilness. You are given a chance to escape, and are given a choice of four of these items to take with you:

3m long rope.
Matches.
Mouldy block of cheese.
Rusty hacksaw.
Can of whipped cream.
A barbie doll, minus head.
A compact disc labelled "Greatest Hits of the 80s: Volume Three"
An empty glass, to be filled with a random nondescript fluid.
A broomstick.
A slightly worn "I heart NY" T-shirt
A map of Warsaw city center, written in Polish.
A torch.
Two AA Batteries.
A remote controlled car.
A book about advanced calculus.
A permanent marker.


I choose the matches, the remote controlled car, the hacksaw and the torch.

I light the torch with a match and attempt to burn through the wooden door.

Then, I use the rusty hacksaw to saw through the wooden door. Turns out the door is rickety one-sheet plywood, crumbly from age and the "rust" on the hacksaw isn't rust at all but dried blood covering a brandnew heavy duty saw. Why, how convenient. :)No fair! When I tried to saw through the door, it wasn't this easy!

The way you dealt with the guy in room C was hilarious, though.

You slide your foot in, and whilst the surface on the bottom is rough, the water temperature is actually comfortably (and surprisingly) warm. Well, time to search the bottom. How do you wish to do so?With my hands, bending over and holding my breath, when necessary.

I choose the matches, the remote controlled car, the hacksaw and the torch.

I light the torch with a match and attempt to burn through the wooden door.I think torch, in this case, is Brit/Aussiespeak for 'flashlight'.

With my hands, bending over and holding my breath, when necessary.

I think torch, in this case, is Brit/Aussiespeak for 'flashlight'.

Didn't realize that. If that's the case, then I'll just try using the matches to light the wood on fire and save the torch for later.

1) First, I screw on the top of the permanent marker real good.
Then, I use the rusty hacksaw to saw through the wooden door. Turns out the door is rickety one-sheet plywood, crumbly from age and the "rust" on the hacksaw isn't rust at all but dried blood covering a brandnew heavy duty saw. Why, how convenient. :)

Sorry, it's not. ;) It's my dungeon, and I make the rules - i'm afraid that door is solid oak, although it may be possible with a lot of effort to saw through with a rusty hacksaw, as Jello Biafra did. Try again. :p

(although your reply was amusing, i'll give you that :p)

I pick none of the above and instead, seduce the guards!

After 6 hours, no guards have come for you. As high-tide comes in, water starts pouring into the grate near the ceiling, though - you must be near the beach. With no way out of the room, you drown.

Try again. :p

ROOM A:

It contains a suspiciously soiled matress on the ground, and a small grate near the ceiling allows a tiny amount of light to filter through. The grate isn't large enough to squeeze through, but you could fit an arm through if you could reach and one of the bars were removed, somehow. The walls are slimy and moss covered, and the same is true of the floor. The cobblestones in the floor are somewhat loose, and with no small effort, you could probably remove one, but it would make some noise. A small pit in the corner contains stuff you probably don't want to know about. A wooden door leads to the next room.

I use the hacksaw to make a mess of the matress in search of a key to the wooden door. :p

Genius. :D That's me. :D
Though I'm sure we can count on Kanabiana to make up something out of thin air that retroactively foils my plan. :p

No fair! When I tried to saw through the door, it wasn't this easy!

The way you dealt with the guy in room C was hilarious, though.
Well, they had to renew and reinforce the door after my successful break-out, of course. Sorry. :D

Sorry, it's not. ;) It's my dungeon, and I make the rules - i'm afraid that door is solid oak, although it may be possible with a lot of effort to saw through with a rusty hacksaw, as Jello Biafra did. Try again. :p
Speak of the devil... :rolleyes: :p

Okay, the door is solid oak then. And I'm guessing the hacksaw has to be rusty, too, eh?

Alright then, no biggie, I'll saw through the door with the rusty hacksaw, with a lot of effort, like Jello Biafra did - except I'd be alot smarter. :D

I'd only use the saw to saw some deep grooves into the wood around the lock. Then I'll roundhouse kick the door open.

A book about advanced calculus.
Matches.
A slightly worn "I heart NY" T-shirt
A compact disc labelled "Greatest Hits of the 80s: Volume Three"

Room A: tears up some of the book of advanced calculus shoving under and around the wooden door, tears up the mattress also piles this against the wall 'gah my hands smell like.... well soiled mattress' proceeds to use on of the matches to ignite the pile against the door hoping that either the door will burn through or the smoke will alert some one and rescue me.

'Covers face with dampened I heart NY shirt to help against the smoke and lies down in furthest the part of the room from the door'

'I’m assuming that there is some water on the floors or walls as there is slimy moss'

With my hands, bending over and holding my breath, when necessary.

Searching the bottom yields no real results, except for feeling something cold and slimy brush past your right arm, just below where you injured it. You shiver. There are no tunnels along the edges of the pool that you can reach from here.

Getting out your trusty rope and calculus book, you place it further ahead of you. It sinks down to a lower depth than before, to another meter deeper than it your current level.

I think torch, in this case, is Brit/Aussiespeak for 'flashlight'.

Yep.


I use the hacksaw to make a mess of the matress in search of a key to the wooden door.

Well, it seems that the matress has already had a mess made of it - a pile of droppings is on it and "MONKEYPIMP WAS HERE '06" is scrawled on it in what looks like feces. Ignoring this, you hack away at the matress. Inside the mattress, you find a whole lot of US $2 bills. After spending an hour on it, you fail to find a key, but you are some $500 richer. Several springs are also leftover from the destroyed mattress, you may grab one if you wish.

You have 5 hours remaining.

Searching the bottom yields no real results, except for feeling something cold and slimy brush past your right arm, just below where you injured it. You shiver. There are no tunnels along the edges of the pool that you can reach from here.

Getting out your trusty rope and calculus book, you place it further ahead of you. It sinks down to a lower depth than before, to another meter deeper than it your current level.Am I able to swim? If so, I'll dive deeper and continue the search.

Well, it seems that the matress has already had a mess made of it - a pile of droppings is on it and "MONKEYPIMP WAS HERE '06" is scrawled on it in what looks like feces. Ignoring this, you hack away at the matress. Inside the mattress, you find a whole lot of US $2 bills. After spending an hour on it, you fail to find a key, but you are some $500 richer. Several springs are also leftover from the destroyed mattress, you may grab one if you wish.

You have 5 hours remaining.

*Shakes fist at Monkeypimp. Takes one of the springs*

I look for a key around and under the cobblestones, using the ripped up matress to soften the noise.

"MONKEYPIMP WAS HERE '06" is scrawled on it in what looks like feces.
:p

Speak of the devil... :rolleyes: :p

Okay, the door is solid oak then. And I'm guessing the hacksaw has to be rusty, too, eh?

Alright then, no biggie, I'll saw through the door with the rusty hacksaw, with a lot of effort, like Jello Biafra did - except I'd be alot smarter. :D

I'd only use the saw to saw some deep grooves into the wood around the lock. Then I'll roundhouse kick the door open.

Good work! The door swings open with the force of your kick....and swings back, hitting you in the face.

Your nose is squished into some sort of pulp, and blood streams down your face.

Still, you're through.


Didn't realize that. If that's the case, then I'll just try using the matches to light the wood on fire and save the torch for later.

Your plan works, sort-of. The smoke rapidly fills the room, and with no way out, you eventually succumb to it. Since there is nothing besides the door to burn, you don't die after this, but you do drown as your 6 hours expire and water rushes through the grate in the corner of the room, immersing your unconscious body.

A book about advanced calculus.
Matches.
A slightly worn "I heart NY" T-shirt
A compact disc labelled "Greatest Hits of the 80s: Volume Three"

Room A: tears up some of the book of advanced calculus shoving under and around the wooden door, tears up the mattress also piles this against the wall 'gah my hands smell like.... well soiled mattress' proceeds to use on of the matches to ignite the pile against the door hoping that either the door will burn through or the smoke will alert some one and rescue me.

'Covers face with dampened I heart NY shirt to help against the smoke and lies down in furthest the part of the room from the door'

'I’m assuming that there is some water on the floors or walls as there is slimy moss'

Excellent and well-formulated plan. The door burns enough that it eventually falls off it's hinges, but starting the fire was so difficult that you had to use all of your matches. It takes about an hour and a half to burn through, though, in addition to the time spent on starting the fire.

You have 4 hours left. You are out of matches, and you only have the cover of your book remaining.

Your plan works, sort-of. The smoke rapidly fills the room, and with no way out, you eventually succumb to it. Since there is nothing besides the door to burn, you don't die after this, but you do drown as your 6 hours expire and water rushes through the grate in the corner of the room, immersing your unconscious body.


Aww. Can I try again?

I pick broomstick, advanced calculus book, can of whipped cream, matches.

Use the broomstick over the book as a lever to work on pry up cobblestones, loudly.

Well, it seems that the matress has already had a mess made of it - a pile of droppings is on it and "MONKEYPIMP WAS HERE '06" is scrawled on it in what looks like feces.



*swish*

After two minutes without Internet I don't see the point in life anymore, I smash the empty glass and cut my wrists.

I die.

Excellent and well-formulated plan. The door burns enough that it eventually falls off it's hinges, but starting the fire was so difficult that you had to use all of your matches. It takes about an hour and a half, though.

You have 4 and a half hours left. You are out of matches, and you only have the cover of your book remaining.

thank you, 'i picked the calculus book only so i could easily light the fire and keep the matches, you've made me a sad panda :('

4:30

moves into room B.
uses the 80's cd to reflect the coloum of light around the room to get a better look, tries to see where the rodents would enter and exit the room.

Aww. Can I try again?

Sure. :)


*Shakes fist at Monkeypimp. Takes one of the springs*

I look for a key around and under the cobblestones, using the ripped up matress to soften the noise.

Fortunately, the first cobblestone you lift has the reward of an envelope. There is a note inside:

It reads:

Johnny got in terrible trouble the other night. After a night out, he left his house keys inside his favourite drinking establishment - often, he felt that place was central to his life. His wife was not happy, and he had to spend the night in the car.

You have four and a half hours left.

I will take (selected items in bold):

3m long rope.
Matches.
Mouldy block of cheese.
Rusty hacksaw.
Can of whipped cream.
A barbie doll, minus head.
A compact disc labelled "Greatest Hits of the 80s: Volume Three"
An empty glass, to be filled with a random nondescript fluid.
A broomstick.
A slightly worn "I heart NY" T-shirt
A map of Warsaw city center, written in Polish.
A torch. (flashlight)
Two AA Batteries.
A remote controlled car.
A book about advanced calculus.
A permanent marker.

No need for a fourth item

ROOM A:

It contains a suspiciously soiled matress on the ground, and a small grate near the ceiling allows a tiny amount of light to filter through. The grate isn't large enough to squeeze through, but you could fit an arm through if you could reach and one of the bars were removed, somehow. The walls are slimy and moss covered, and the same is true of the floor. The cobblestones in the floor are somewhat loose, and with no small effort, you could probably remove one, but it would make some noise. A small pit in the corner contains stuff you probably don't want to know about. A wooden door leads to the next room.
This is nothing. I just tur on the torch, walk across, and open the door.

ROOM B:

There is a pool in the middle - it is impossible to tell how deep it is. Aside from a small, unsafe looking moss covered ledge along the left side of the room, it is blocking your path. Several small creatures scurry around in the dark, pausing to nibble on the small clumps of fungi on the edge of the pool. There are some tree roots hanging down from the natural rock ceiling, and a small column of light pierces through a hairline crack in it - this is more detrimental than anything, though, as the bright light coming from this opening isn't enough to light the room and the contrast prevents your eyes from adjusting properly to the dark. The doorway at the opposite end of the room looks to be made of rusty iron.
I tie the rope to two of the tree roots, and then use it to get across the pool. Then into the next room.

ROOM C:

This massive cavernous room contains a gigantic dinner table, with seats and cutlery, set up as if awaiting a banquet - there appears to be food present on the table, but lids cover the plates, so exactly what is being served is unknown to you. Candelebras in the roof provide adequate lighting. A sign next to the door you entered says "please remove shoes." A fishtank with some exotic looking fish is on one side of the room, and on the other, an extremely large and excessively strong looking man stands in front of the exit, blocking your path. He stares ahead blankly and doesn't seem to pay attention to your presence.
I toss the map of warsaw at the guy, and he starts to read it, confused, as it is in a foreign languge. Since he is distracted, i sneak past, and have escaped for kanabia's dungeon.

Good work! The door swings open with the force of your kick....and swings back, hitting you in the face.

Your nose is squished into some sort of pulp, and blood streams down your face.

Still, you're through.

Of course I am. So, what do I win? :)

Sure. :)



Fortunately, the first cobblestone you lift has the reward of an envelope. There is a note inside:

It reads:



You have four and a half hours left.

o.O *Takes evelope on the proviso that it may prove useful*

Can I see everything that is in the room, provided it's not inside something else?

'can i swim, if so lowers self into the pool and wades around, dives underwater looking for a possible submarine exits, also searches for any items.

And remember - this is my dungeon, and I make the rules. None of this "door is made of crumbly plywood" stuff. ;)
Sneaky OP edit! :eek:

I mean, how was I supposed to know? You only said "wooden", so there. *innocent look*

After two minutes without Internet I don't see the point in life anymore, I smash the empty glass and cut my wrists.

I die.
:p

Am I able to swim? If so, I'll dive deeper and continue the search.

As you dive deeper, you continue feel slimy things brush against you. This makes you uneasy - your shoulder is continuing to painfully bleed into the water. Are you sure this is a good idea?

I pick broomstick, advanced calculus book, can of whipped cream, matches.

Use the broomstick over the book as a lever to work on pry up cobblestones, loudly.

You find numerous bugs, and an old rusty nail. You also have a stack of cobblestones. At one point, after making a lot of noise, you hear a rumble in the distance.

You spent an hour on this, though. You can keep going, or find something else to do.

You have 5 hours remaining.


thank you, 'i picked the calculus book only so i could easily light the fire and keep the matches, you've made me a sad panda '

4:30

moves into room B.
uses the 80's cd to reflect the coloum of light around the room to get a better look, tries to see where the rodents would enter and exit the room.

Interesting idea. But you are struck with the horror that those aren't actually rodents. They're exceptionally large "bird eating" spiders - perhaps an unknown species, since there are no birds to be found in here - with fangs as big as fingers, and the light has attracted them towards you...

Interesting idea. But you are struck with the horror that those aren't actually rodents. They're exceptionally large "bird eating" spiders - perhaps an unknown species, since there are no birds to be found in here - with fangs as big as fingers, and the light has attracted them towards you...

'uses wet NY shirt like a towel and whips the spiders away'

and then goes for the fore mentioned swim

As you dive deeper, you continue feel slimy things brush against you. This makes you uneasy - your shoulder is continuing to painfully bleed into the water. Are you sure this is a good idea?Well, all I have left is the headless Barbie, so I guess I'll go for it.

What is the composition of the door latch and hinges as well as hinge location.

Of course I am. So, what do I win? :)

Nothing. You're in room B. :p

This is nothing. I just tur on the torch, walk across, and open the door.

The handle stubbornly refuses to turn. The door is locked.

Sneaky OP edit!

I mean, how was I supposed to know? You only said "wooden", so there. *innocent look*

Hehe. ;)

The handle stubbornly refuses to turn. The door is locked.

You did not say it was locked, you cheat!

anyway, since it is but a peice of wood, i kick it down.

how do you escape the dungeon?

by being macgyver

Lacking in any ideas I'll randomly pull up as many cobblestones as I can, making as much noise as possible, in the hopes of tricking the stupid guard to come and open the door for me. Assuming he does I'll pelt him with the cobblestones I just pulled up.

Nothing. You're in room B. :p Oh please, I was already out of the dungeon when you came back to whine about how your door wasn't made out of plywood!

Not my fault that you have to change your OP all the time, but here we go again, copied & pasted for only Room B.:rolleyes::p :

2) I walk alongside the pool, using the hacksaw to scrape off the slippery moss on the ledge, and get across without any problems.
On the other side of the room, I place the mouldy block of cheese in a corner of the doorway, knock on the iron door and take out my map of Warsaw city center, written in Polish.

3) When the extremely large and excessively strong looking man comes to open the door and points to the sign, I take off my shoes, smile, point at the map, and ask him how for the way to the Louvre.

Interesting idea. But you are struck with the horror that those aren't actually rodents. They're exceptionally large "bird eating" spiders - perhaps an unknown species, since there are no birds to be found in here - with fangs as big as fingers, and the light has attracted them towards you...

'uses wet NY shirt like a towel and whips the spiders away'

and then goes for the fore mentioned swim

While you successfully whip away a couple, they seem to be coming from all directions, and some are too large to be properly deterred. Are you sure you want to plunge into the water hastily, or do you have another idea?

Well, all I have left is the headless Barbie, so I guess I'll go for it.

You hold your breath and dive deeper...you feel something slimy wrap around your arm...

What is the composition of the door latch and hinges as well as hinge location.

There are two hinges - both placed on the left hand side of the door - one an eighth of the distance from the top, and the other an eighth of the distance from the bottom. The hinges and the handle are all made of iron.

There are two hinges - both placed on the left hand side of the door - one an eighth of the distance from the top, and the other an eighth of the distance from the bottom. The hinges and the handle are all made of iron.

So they are all on my side of the door? Use the rusty nail to push out the pins holding the door on the hinges.

Option 1:

Matches,
Book,
Tshirt
broomstick.

I set all of these objects execpt for the broomstick on fire and wait for someone to react to the fact that smoke is coming from the ground or floor, I then use the broomstick on whoever comes to check on it.

While you successfully whip away a couple, they seem to be coming from all directions, and some are too large to be properly deterred. Are you sure you want to plunge into the water hastily, or do you have another idea?

4:15

'Retreats back to the Door way, pick up a peice of embering wood from the burnt door and stabs at the spiders with the hot pointy end'

4:15

'Retreats back to the Door way, pick up a peice of embering wood from the burnt door and stabs at the spiders with the hot pointy end'
Hm, you're good at this. It's like watching some fantasy movie. I'm totally rooting for you. :)

You hold your breath and dive deeper...you feel something slimy wrap around your arm...I attempt to yank my arm up...

You did not say it was locked, you cheat!

Ahh, but you have to experiment with the environment to discover these things. From simple observation, the locked status isn't readily visible.

anyway, since it is but a peice of wood, i kick it down.

It's solid oak, unfortunately. You succeed in little more than bruising your foot. Maybe there is some way to make it easier to get out.

Lacking in any ideas I'll randomly pull up as many cobblestones as I can, making as much noise as possible, in the hopes of tricking the stupid guard to come and open the door for me. Assuming he does I'll pelt him with the cobblestones I just pulled up.

After spending an hour on it, you hear a distant rumble.

Unfortunately, nobody comes.

You have 5 hours left, and a big pile of cobblestones at your disposal, but no other items, as you neglected to choose them. ;)

Oh please, I was already out of the dungeon when you came back to whine about how your door wasn't made out of plywood!

Not my fault that you have to change your OP all the time, but here we go again, copied & pasted for only Room B. :

Well, it's not really any fun if things work out exactly as we plan, is it? If only life was like that. :p

2) I walk alongside the pool, using the hacksaw to scrape off the slippery moss on the ledge, and get across without any problems.

Good idea - it takes you half an hour, and you get across safely.

On the other side of the room, I place the mouldy block of cheese in a corner of the doorway, knock on the iron door and take out my map of Warsaw city center, written in Polish.

Nobody answers your incessant knocking. But you hurt your knuckles rapping on it.

What now? You have 4 and a half hours left.

o.O *Takes evelope on the proviso that it may prove useful*

Can I see everything that is in the room, provided it's not inside something else?

Oi! Answer me! It's cold in here! :p

It's solid oak, unfortunately. You succeed in little more than bruising your foot. Maybe there is some way to make it easier to get out.

Then i search the room for a lockpick.

Hm, you're good at this. It's like watching some fantasy movie. I'm totally rooting for you. :)

thanks i was about to give up but now i'll fight on.

're-doubles effort to badly burn spiders'

Hey, it would take longer to pry shit up by hand than with a lever. That's why it's called a tool, it makes shit easier.

Oi! Answer me! It's cold in here! :p

*appears to warm TBD up, then vanishes again in a puff of smike*

:D

*appears to warm TBD up, then vanishes again in a puff of smike*

:D

Oh, how kind! :D

*Is now sufficiently warmed and ready to continue with the escape*.

4:15

'Retreats back to the Door way, pick up a peice of embering wood from the burnt door and stabs at the spiders with the hot pointy end'

Good idea, and you're successful - after impaling and singeing a few of them, they back off. Time for a swim!


'can i swim, if so lowers self into the pool and wades around, dives underwater looking for a possible submarine exits, also searches for any items.

On the bottom of the pool, you find a rusty longsword stuck vertically inbetween two rocks, which you may take if you wish. There's no tunnel out, though. What now?

Hm, you're good at this. It's like watching some fantasy movie. I'm totally rooting for you. :)

He is. :)


o.O *Takes evelope on the proviso that it may prove useful*

Can I see everything that is in the room, provided it's not inside something else?

Yep.

I attempt to yank my arm up...

....And are successful. It's just some sort of underwater plant. Whew. On the bottom of the pool, you find a rusty longsword stuck vertically inbetween two rocks, which you may take if you wish. There's no tunnel out, though. What now?

:p

After spending an hour on it, you hear a distant rumble.

Unfortunately, nobody comes.

You have 5 hours left, and a big pile of cobblestones at your disposal, but no other items, as you neglected to choose them. ;)

Oh well. I guess I'll start amusing myself by spelling out a will in the cobblestones.

"Hands off my stuff!"

....And are successful. It's just some sort of underwater plant. Whew. On the bottom of the pool, you find a rusty longsword stuck vertically inbetween two rocks, which you may take if you wish. There's no tunnel out, though. What now? Ooh, a sword. I take it, giving that evil plant a few swipes just for general principles. I swim to the surface, go to the iron door and attempt to pull or push it open.

Good idea, and you're successful - after impaling and singeing a few of them, they back off. Time for a swim!

4:00

alright takes Sword, and swims over to the other side of the pool, climbs up and walks over to the iron door, pulls out the trust 80's cd and attempts to jiggy the lock like a credit car.
'while being carful enough not to break the CD'

ROOM A:

It contains a suspiciously soiled matress on the ground, and a small grate near the ceiling allows a tiny amount of light to filter through. The grate isn't large enough to squeeze through, but you could fit an arm through if you could reach and one of the bars were removed, somehow. The walls are slimy and moss covered, and the same is true of the floor. The cobblestones in the floor are somewhat loose, and with no small effort, you could probably remove one, but it would make some noise. A small pit in the corner contains stuff you probably don't want to know about. A wooden door leads to the next room.


That leaves the pit. *Stirs around with broomstick, hoping the end hits something metallic*

Nobody answers your incessant knocking. But you hurt your knuckles rapping on it.

What now? You have 4 and a half hours left.
Knowing that all extremely large and excessively strong looking men also have an extremely soft spot for fluffy, cuddly things and are excessively dumb, I fold out the map of Warsaw city center (written in Polish) wet my finger in the blood still trickling from my smashed nose and write in big, wobbly letters onto the map:

HELP! MY PUPPY IS HURT!

I slide the map underneath the door and start making loud, pitiful, whining puppy noises.
The guard comes over to investigate, and when I hear him say "Awww, oh noes!" and unlock the door, I quickly pinch my shattered nose to make myself cry.



Off to Room 3! :)

Option 1 repeat: Set everything on fire in room 1.

Starting option 2:

Room 1:
Objects:
Matches
Broomstick
Mouldy block of cheese
remote controlled car

Push the old mattress by the door. Examine the disgusting pit for at least 15 minutes. After that spend a half hour pulling up cobblestones.
(Or in old 80s Apple 2 adventures) (Loved Mystery house)

/PUSH MATTRESS
/LOOK PIT
/PULL STONE X20

Hey, hey, you keep forgetting about me.

A Hyrulean sword and the Ocarina of Time.

Sure. :)


OK.:)
Do I have to use the same four items as before?

thanks i was about to give up but now i'll fight on. Yay!

Oh well. I guess I'll start amusing myself by spelling out a will in the cobblestones.

"Hands off my stuff!"
:p

So they are all on my side of the door? Use the rusty nail to push out the pins holding the door on the hinges.

Fortunately for you, the door is poorly constructed and it only takes you an hour. You feel another rumble whilst doing so.

You're through to the next area.

You have 4 hours remaining.

Oh well. I guess I'll start amusing myself by spelling out a will in the cobblestones.

"Hands off my stuff!"

As you lift one cobblestone, you find an envelope. There is a note inside, It reads:


Johnny got in terrible trouble the other night. After a night out, he left his house keys inside his favourite drinking establishment - often, he felt that place was central to his life. His wife was not happy, and he had to spend the night in the car.

You have four hours left.

Hey, it would take longer to pry shit up by hand than with a lever. That's why it's called a tool, it makes shit easier.

Unless you're lucky and the first stone you pick has something underneath it.

But you got a nail, not an envelope. :P

Option 1:

Matches,
Book,
Tshirt
broomstick.

I set all of these objects execpt for the broomstick on fire and wait for someone to react to the fact that smoke is coming from the ground or floor, I then use the broomstick on whoever comes to check on it.

The smoke from the fire rapidly fills the room. You cough and feel a bit lightheaded. After an hour, nobody comes.

You have 5 hours left, a handful of matches, and a broomstick.

Ok fiiine.

What are the observable pool dimensions.

As you lift one cobblestone, you find an envelope. There is a note inside, It reads:



You have four hours left.

I couldn't care less about this Johnny person, I have a will to write!

I forgot to delete option one. Option two was the one I chose.

Ooh, a sword. I take it, giving that evil plant a few swipes just for general principles. I swim to the surface, go to the iron door and attempt to pull or push it open.

As you probably expected, it won't budge.

You hear a voice behind you:

"Give me back my sword."


4:00

alright takes Sword, and swims over to the other side of the pool, climbs up and walks over to the iron door, pulls out the trust 80's cd and attempts to jiggy the lock like a credit car.
'while being carful enough not to break the CD'

You are interrupted.

You hear a voice behind you:

"Give me back my sword."

:p

Knowing that all extremely large and excessively strong looking men also have an extremely soft spot for fluffy, cuddly things and are excessively dumb, I fold out the map of Warsaw city center (written in Polish) wet my finger in the blood still trickling from my smashed nose and write in big, wobbly letters onto the map:

HELP! MY PUPPY IS HURT!

I slide the map underneath the door and start making loud, pitiful, whining puppy noises.
The guard comes over to investigate, and when I hear him say "Awww, oh noes!" and unlock the door, I quickly pinch my shattered nose to make myself cry.



Off to Room 3!

You don't seem to get it. I make the rules and determine the outcomes. ;)

Nobody comes, and for the moment at least, you are shy one map of Warsaw City Center (in Polish). You do succeed, however, in making yourself look rather silly. Maybe there's something else in the room that can help you.


That leaves the pit. *Stirs around with broomstick, hoping the end hits something metallic*

You stir the disgusting pit, and a glob of what you sincerely hope is mud flies up and hits you in the face.

There is something hard at the bottom.

Starting option 2:

Room 1:
Objects:
Matches
Broomstick
Mouldy block of cheese
remote controlled car

Push the old mattress by the door. Examine the disgusting pit for at least 15 minutes. After that spend a half hour pulling up cobblestones.
(Or in old 80s Apple 2 adventures) (Loved Mystery house)

/PUSH MATTRESS
/LOOK PIT
/PULL STONE X20 EDIT - missed your other post.

There is nothing underneath the mattress, however, examining the pit is difficult, because you can't see what's in there. Do you want to put your hands in?
OK.
Do I have to use the same four items as before?

Nope. :)

As you probably expected, it won't budge.

You hear a voice behind you:

"Give me back my sword."I turn around, on my guard, to face whoever it was that said it.

You stir the disgusting pit, and a glob of what you sincerely hope is mud flies up and hits you in the face.

There is something hard at the bottom.

Hard and approximately what size and material?

I couldn't care less about this Johnny person, I have a will to write!

Well, your will is written. You've got 4 hours left. :p

I turn around, on my guard, to face whoever it was that said it.

yeah that

I turn around, on my guard, to face whoever it was that said it.

You come face to face with a figure dressed in a black robe, almost seven feet tall, and with a menacing look on his face, and an eerie glow in his eyes. He repeats: "Give me back my sword."


Hard and approximately what size and material?

It's impossible to tell with just the broomstick.

Well, your will is written. You've got 4 hours left. :p

Do I have many cobblestones left over?

You come face to face with a figure dressed in a black robe, almost seven feet tall, and with a menacing look on his face, and an eerie glow in his eyes. He repeats: "Give me back my sword."I tell him okay, but only if he opens that door for me first.

It's impossible to tell with just the broomstick.

No it's not. >.<

It's impossible to tell with just the broomstick.

Ha ha, sucker.

What's are the dimension of the pool?

You come face to face with a figure dressed in a black robe, almost seven feet tall, and with a menacing look on his face, and an eerie glow in his eyes. He repeats: "Give me back my sword."

ask him who he is and why i should give him his sword back?

Nope. :)

Okay. Then I'll try with the rope, the calculus book, the hacksaw, and the torch.

I try to hack through the wooden door.

You don't seem to get it. I make the rules and determine the outcomes. ;)
Oh shuddup. ;p

Nobody comes, and for the moment at least, you are shy one map of Warsaw City Center (in Polish).
No, I'm not, and you can't just randomly make up that I am, because I was never stupid enough to slide it wholly into the other room, of course I held on to it. Seriously now. Sheesh. :rolleyes: :p

You do succeed, however, in making yourself look rather silly. Maybe there's something else in the room that can help you.
I fold the map of Warsaw city center (written in Polish) back up and put it in my pocket.
I take off one of my boots and start shoveling water from the shallow edge of the pool into the boot and then pour it under the iron door into the next room. I keep doing this until I'm sure that the people who set the banquet table and are responsible for keeping the banquet room immaculate will notice and will have to open the door to investigate.

I fold the map of Warsaw city center (written in Polish) back up and put it in my pocket.
I take off one of my boots and start shoveling water from the shallow edge of the pool into the boot and then pour it under the iron door into the next room. I keep doing this until I'm sure that the people who set the banquet table and are responsible for keeping the banquet room immaculate will notice and will have to open the door to investigate.How do you come up with this stuff? It's hilarious.

Fuck it, I span the pool with the wooden door and remove the pins on the iron door.

No it's not. >.<
:p He's infuriating in his Absolute Power megalomania, isn't he?

How do you come up with this stuff? It's hilarious.
I thought that was a pretty reasonable way to proceed, actually. :( :p

I thought that was a pretty reasonable way to proceed, actually. :( :pPerhaps, but it's also highly entertaining for me (and perhaps for the rest of us).

You come face to face with a figure dressed in a black robe, almost seven feet tall, and with a menacing look on his face, and an eerie glow in his eyes. He repeats: "Give me back my sword."

ask him if he would trade his sword for this lovely NY t-shirt to brighten up his attire

I'll take the rope, the whipcream, the broomstick, and the marker.

First, I have wild kinky S&M sex with the guard, use the rope to tightly hogtie him. Then I spray the whipcream all over my body and force him to lick it off. Then I violate him with the broomstick and use the marker to write "whore" and "slut" all over his body.

Then I just walk out the unguarded building, maybe get a coffee and read the paper.

so, id there a lockpick?

Use the broomstick to poke what's at the bottom of the hole. (The mattress is against the door for another reason)

Where'd he go? :(

Where'd he go? :(

I'm heeeeeeere, just a minute :p

EDIT -

Or a day. Damned database error thingy.

I tell him okay, but only if he opens that door for me first.

He ignores you.

"Give me back my sword, NOW."

Do I have many cobblestones left over?

A handful.

Oh shuddup. ;p

No, I'm not, and you can't just randomly make up that I am, because I was never stupid enough to slide it wholly into the other room, of course I held on to it. Seriously now. Sheesh.

Sigh, okay.

I take off one of my boots and start shoveling water from the shallow edge of the pool into the boot and then pour it under the iron door into the next room. I keep doing this until I'm sure that the people who set the banquet table and are responsible for keeping the banquet room immaculate will notice and will have to open the door to investigate.

Orly now? How do you know that there's a banquet table in that room? All you can see is a crack of light from under the metal door. ;)

As it stands, nobody comes, and you've wasted an hour of your time on all of this (or maybe not, once you get through.) and now have to wear a wet boot. :p

No it's not. >.<

I'm afraid it is. All you can feel is something hard that moves around at the bottom of the pit. It feels somewhat heavy.


ask him who he is and why i should give him his sword back?

"You need to know nothing. Give me back my sword, NOW."

He takes a step towards you.


ask him if he would trade his sword for this lovely NY t-shirt to brighten up his attire

"...."

The man looks at you quizically.


Okay. Then I'll try with the rope, the calculus book, the hacksaw, and the torch.

I try to hack through the wooden door.

Unfortunately, your hacksaw is in such poor condition that it breaks after half an hour of effort. The door is not sufficiently weakened to break through without something else to finish the job.

Fuck it, I span the pool with the wooden door and remove the pins on the iron door.

(sorry)

To your dismay, the door isn't long enough to span the pool, but being made of wood, it does float...

You use it to cross over and work on removing the pins on the iron door. It takes almost forever, and with a monumental effort, you remove the last one - unfortunately, the extremely heavy solid iron door crashes down upon your head and crushes your skull and breaks your neck in one quick motion. You die a relatively instant death.

so, id there a lockpick?

Where did you want to begin your search?

Use the broomstick to poke what's at the bottom of the hole. (The mattress is against the door for another reason)

It feels somewhat heavy, but moves around with some effort.

Ooooh, the suspense! Heh, what a time for the forum to go down, eh? :p

Seeing as I never got anywhere the first time, and Kanabia generously let me re-choose four items...

The broomstick, the rope, the remote controlled car (assuming it works and actually has a remote control with it), and the torch.

First room:
Using the broomstick, I lever out a cobblestone and proceed to smash the lock with it. Hopefully that'll work.

Second room (if I managed to get through the door):
I turn on the torch and have a proper look round. I also take a look in the pool, if the light from the torch penetrates the surface of the water.

since kanabia is gine, and is unable to make the rules, i take over, find that lockpick, do all that other stuff, and get out of the dungeon.

since kanabia is gine, and is unable to make the rules, i take over, find that lockpick, do all that other stuff, and get out of the dungeon.
Rather removes the fun from this thread, though.

Rather removes the fun from this thread, though.
no, i still get to see kanabia's reaction to that.

:p He's infuriating in his Absolute Power megalomania, isn't he?

Yes. We should plot to overturn him! :D

Yes. We should plot to overturn him! :D
No, we should plot to get my chocolate. Just make sure that in any post where you quote Kanabia, you mention me and chocolate. Either he'll go insane, or I get my chocolate (or both). Either way, we all win. :D

You have been kidnapped by nondescript extremists and placed in their dungeon of evilness. You are given a chance to escape, and are given a choice of four of these items to take with you:

3m long rope.
Matches.
Mouldy block of cheese.
Rusty hacksaw.
Can of whipped cream.
A barbie doll, minus head.
A compact disc labelled "Greatest Hits of the 80s: Volume Three"
An empty glass, to be filled with a random nondescript fluid.
A broomstick.
A slightly worn "I heart NY" T-shirt
A map of Warsaw city center, written in Polish.
A torch. (flashlight)
Two AA Batteries.
A remote controlled car.
A book about advanced calculus.
A permanent marker.

You must escape these three rooms within 6 hours:

ROOM A:

It contains a suspiciously soiled matress on the ground, and a small grate near the ceiling allows a tiny amount of light to filter through. The grate isn't large enough to squeeze through, but you could fit an arm through if you could reach and one of the bars were removed, somehow. The walls are slimy and moss covered, and the same is true of the floor. The cobblestones in the floor are somewhat loose, and with no small effort, you could probably remove one, but it would make some noise. A small pit in the corner contains stuff you probably don't want to know about. A wooden door leads to the next room.

ROOM B:

There is a pool in the middle - it is impossible to tell how deep it is. Aside from a small, unsafe looking moss covered ledge along the left side of the room, it is blocking your path. Several small creatures scurry around in the dark, pausing to nibble on the small clumps of fungi on the edge of the pool. There are some tree roots hanging down from the natural rock ceiling, and a small column of light pierces through a hairline crack in it - this is more detrimental than anything, though, as the bright light coming from this opening isn't enough to light the room and the contrast prevents your eyes from adjusting properly to the dark. The doorway at the opposite end of the room looks to be made of rusty iron.

ROOM C:

This massive cavernous room contains a gigantic dinner table, with seats and cutlery, set up as if awaiting a banquet - there appears to be food present on the table, but lids cover the plates, so exactly what is being served is unknown to you. Candelebras in the roof provide adequate lighting. A sign next to the door you entered says "please remove shoes." A fishtank with some exotic looking fish is on one side of the room, and on the other, an extremely large and excessively strong looking man stands in front of the exit, blocking your path. He stares ahead blankly and doesn't seem to pay attention to your presence.


So, how do you escape the dungeon? To begin with, tell me which items you are choosing, and one room at a time please. You may progress through one action at a time, or through outlining your entire intended set of actions in the room at once. And remember - this is my dungeon, and I make the rules. None of this "door is made of crumbly plywood" stuff. ;)

First to escape all three rooms wins....something.

Oh joy! A game!

I'll take the rope, the "torch" the 2 AA batteries, and the rusty hacksaw.

Now then! To escape from Room A!

I go to the door and try to open it. What happens?

Oh joy! A game!

I'll take the rope, the "torch" the 2 AA batteries, and the rusty hacksaw.

Now then! To escape from Room A!

I go to the door and try to open it. What happens?

http://forums.jolt.co.uk/showpost.php?p=11844046&postcount=18

That's what happens.

http://forums.jolt.co.uk/showpost.php?p=11844046&postcount=18

That's what happens.

Fine. I now proceed to toss the rope through the grating, tie a knot in the rope, and proceed to tug down, attempting to pull off the grating.

No, we should plot to get my chocolate. Just make sure that in any post where you quote Kanabia, you mention me and chocolate. Either he'll go insane, or I get my chocolate (or both). Either way, we all win. :D

Wow, you really must want that chocolate. What type is it?

I'll just play with the Barbie doll and the can of whipped cream...

Wow, you really must want that chocolate. What type is it?
I think it's 70% cocoa, but I can't actually remember. It's been a long time since I was promised it.

Fine. I now proceed to toss the rope through the grating, tie a knot in the rope, and proceed to tug down, attempting to pull off the grating.
Not sure. I don't think anyone's tried that yet.

I use calculus book to kill the mouse chewing through jolt's server wires.

I think it's 70% cocoa, but I can't actually remember. It's been a long time since I was promised it.

Oh yum, maybe I'll take it off his hands... ;)

Fine. I now proceed to toss the rope through the grating, tie a knot in the rope, and proceed to tug down, attempting to pull off the grating.

Success! One of the bars comes free, and the force results in it flying back and hitting your right eye. Ouch! You'll have a nasty black eye from that.

The bar you chose happens to be hollow, however, and inside, you find a key! Bravo! It so happens to fit the lock to the door of this room. You can proceed onto room B, if you like, or have a closer look at the grate.

You have 5 hours and 45 minutes remaining.

Ooooh, the suspense! Heh, what a time for the forum to go down, eh? :p

Yeah, pain in the arse...

First room:
Using the broomstick, I lever out a cobblestone and proceed to smash the lock with it. Hopefully that'll work.

You successfully manage to damage the lock. However, in doing so, the lock mechanism is jammed and the door will have to be opened another way.

You have 5 hours and 30 minutes left.

I tell him okay, but only if he opens that door for me first.

He ignores you.

"Give me back my sword, NOW."

Do I have many cobblestones left over?

A handful.

Oh shuddup. ;p

No, I'm not, and you can't just randomly make up that I am, because I was never stupid enough to slide it wholly into the other room, of course I held on to it. Seriously now. Sheesh.

Sigh, okay.

I take off one of my boots and start shoveling water from the shallow edge of the pool into the boot and then pour it under the iron door into the next room. I keep doing this until I'm sure that the people who set the banquet table and are responsible for keeping the banquet room immaculate will notice and will have to open the door to investigate.

Orly now? How do you know that there's a banquet table in that room? All you can see is a crack of light from under the metal door. ;)

As it stands, nobody comes, and you've wasted an hour of your time on all of this (or maybe not, once you get through.) and now have to wear a wet boot. :p

No it's not. >.<

I'm afraid it is. All you can feel is something hard that moves around at the bottom of the pit. It feels somewhat heavy.


ask him who he is and why i should give him his sword back?

"You need to know nothing. Give me back my sword, NOW."

He takes a step towards you.


ask him if he would trade his sword for this lovely NY t-shirt to brighten up his attire

"...."

The man looks at you quizically.


Okay. Then I'll try with the rope, the calculus book, the hacksaw, and the torch.

I try to hack through the wooden door.

Unfortunately, your hacksaw is in such poor condition that it breaks after half an hour of effort. The door is not sufficiently weakened to break through without something else to finish the job.

Fuck it, I span the pool with the wooden door and remove the pins on the iron door.

(sorry)

To your dismay, the door isn't long enough to span the pool, but being made of wood, it does float...

You use it to cross over and work on removing the pins on the iron door. It takes almost forever, and with a monumental effort, you remove the last one - unfortunately, the extremely heavy solid iron door crashes down upon your head and crushes your skull and breaks your neck in one quick motion. You die a relatively instant death.

so, id there a lockpick?

Where did you want to begin your search?

Use the broomstick to poke what's at the bottom of the hole. (The mattress is against the door for another reason)

It feels somewhat heavy, but moves around with some effort.

Oh yum, maybe I'll take it off his hands... ;)
Noooooo!!! :( I'll get chocolate from Kanabia or I'll die trying. Just like getting out of this dungeon, really...

You successfully manage to damage the lock. However, in doing so, the lock mechanism is jammed and the door will have to be opened another way.

You have 5 hours and 30 minutes left.
Ok. Was there anything under the cobblestone? I'll follow Naliitr's idea and pull down the grating with the rope. However, I shall defend myself against falling bars with the broomstick.

Oh yeah, and could you answer my questions about the remote controlled car?

That's absurd.
Taking it out on me for being the bestest escaper.

Noooooo!!! :( I'll get chocolate from Kanabia or I'll die trying. Just like getting out of this dungeon, really...

But it would be so much easier for him to give it to me. He wouldn't even have to pay postage. :p

But it would be so much easier for him to give it to me. He wouldn't even have to pay postage. :p
But a promise is a promise. Although I'm not sure Kanabia ever actually promised he'd give me the chocolate...

Come on ya Aussie git, send me that chocolate! Please? :)

But a promise is a promise. Although I'm not sure Kanabia ever actually promised he'd give me the chocolate...

Come on ya Aussie git, send me that chocolate! Please? :)

If you don't quit bitching, i'll gnaw on it, microwave it, spit on it, throw it in my toilet, and take pictures. And then send you the empty wrapper.

Hehe :p

It should be there in a couple of weeks.

That's absurd.
Taking it out on me for being the bestest escaper.

What did you think would happen? It's a massive iron door.

And besides, I reward ingenuity, not repetition of previous tactics. Did you really think it would be that easy? :p

Ok. Was there anything under the cobblestone? I'll follow Naliitr's idea and pull down the grating with the rope. However, I shall defend myself against falling bars with the broomstick.
I just remembered that I smashed the lock. Bugger.

In that case I'll try to make a hole in the door large enough for me to get through by using the broomstick and the cobblestone and repeatedly whacking the door. If I can break the lock, I can break the door.

If you don't quit bitching, i'll gnaw on it, microwave it, spit on it, throw it in my toilet, and take pictures. And then send you the empty wrapper.

Hehe :p

It should be there in a couple of weeks.

Yay! :D

Best news I've had all day.

Ok. Was there anything under the cobblestone?

Nada.

I'll follow Naliitr's idea and pull down the grating with the rope. However, I shall defend myself against falling bars with the broomstick.

After much effort, you meet with success. One of the bars flies at you, and you manage to deflect it with your broomstick - which, unfortunately, cracks from the impact.

Inside the bar, which mysteriously happens to be hollow, is a key.

Unfortunately, the lock on the door is jammed, so it is of little use to you.

You have 5 hours left, and you have two broomstick halves.

Oh yeah, and could you answer my questions about the remote controlled car?

I missed that and I cbf looking. What did you want to know? :p

I just remembered that I smashed the lock. Bugger.

In that case I'll try to make a hole in the door large enough for me to get through by using the broomstick and the cobblestone and repeatedly whacking the door. If I can break the lock, I can break the door.

This crude method will take an exceptionally long time. Are you sure?

:p

Nada.
In that case I'd like to dig up more cobblestones until I find something that could be construed as useful, and not that sodding note about Johnny getting drunk and losing his key.



After much effort, you meet with success. One of the bars flies at you, and you manage to deflect it with your broomstick - which, unfortunately, cracks from the impact.

Inside the bar, which mysteriously happens to be hollow, is a key.

Unfortunately, the lock on the door is jammed, so it is of little use to you.

You have 5 hours left, and you have two broomstick halves.
My plan is working perfectly...:rolleyes:


I missed that and I cbf looking. What did you want to know? :p
Does it work, and is there a working remote control with it? Also, what's the battery life like?

This crude method will take an exceptionally long time. Are you sure?

:p
Yes, because I have a plan for when I get through to the next room. And if not, I can always try again.

What did you think would happen? It's a massive iron door.

And besides, I reward ingenuity, not repetition of previous tactics. Did you really think it would be that easy? :p

You didn't reward my ingenuity. :(

room A: open the door.

room B: swim across.

room C: set fire to the guard with the matches.

"You need to know nothing. Give me back my sword, NOW."
He takes a step towards you.
ask him if he would trade his sword for this lovely NY t-shirt to brighten up his attire

"...."
The man looks at you quizically.

'save game'

Brandish the Sword threateningly while backing away, "Back up buddy or ill chop you good, look i got the sword and i will give it back just as soon as you answer some questions"

'If he agrees.
Question 1: Who are you and what the hell is going on here?
Question 2: how do i get this door open?
Question 3: what do you want the sword for???

'tell him to open the door if he wants his sword, giving it to him if he complies,

if he refuses chop him!'

some how i dont think chopping him will work, seeing he's probably a ghost or somthing 'if the sword passes through him i'll throw it back into the water.

A handful.

I guess I'll try and learn how to juggle with two of them.

taking this not as serious as it is

Yes, because I have a plan for when I get through to the next room. And if not, I can always try again.
If the whole bashing the door thing does work, and assuming I have long enough left, this is what I'll do when I'm in the next room:

Shine torch around to get a better look at my surroundings.

Use torch to take a look at the pool - hopefully I'll be able to see below the surface with the light.

And besides, I reward ingenuity, not repetition of previous tactics.
ORLY?
You didn't reward my ingenuity. :(
Yeah, mine neither. Liar. :mad: :(

Orly now? How do you know that there's a banquet table in that room?
All you can see is a crack of light from under the metal door. ;)
I know because you told us. Easy. ;)

As it stands, nobody comes, and you've wasted an hour of your time on all of this (or maybe not, once you get through.) and now have to wear a wet boot. :p
Alright, Mr. High and Mighty.:p If you don't want ingenious, you can have boring.

I put my wet boot back on. I notice I'm shivering from the cold and realize how damp the air in the room is, from the pool of course and the water seeping in along the roots and through the hairline cracks in the roof and walls. That door didn't get rusty from nothing.
I figure the constant water erosion must have made both the rock and the iron fastenings of the door porous. So I take out my hacksaw and slide it into the crack between wall and door frame and saw at the crumbly rock, trying to either saw the doorframe out of the wall or widen the crack to a gap that's wide enough to squeeze through.

I give up. :(

I give up. :(
But you fixed the thread! Suddenly the posts after page 10 are actually displayed. Yay for Ruffy! :)

But you fixed the thread! Suddenly the posts after page 10 are actually displayed. Yay for Ruffy! :)

Yeah, I noticed that. :D

Kanabia, would you mind if I turned this into a little text adventure game sometime?

I won't play at the moment though.

Where did you want to begin your search?
i already found one, used the rope to get across the pool, and confused that giant with the polish map, all while you were gone.

I pick the broom stick the rope the matches and the car. I tear the front and back cloth facings from the matress to have two pieces of cloth. One of these I place matress filler on until light cannot pass through. I collect a fat pile of cobblestones. I pull out my hair and twist it into three pieces of twine I tie a large cobblestone to each piece of twine. I then break part of the car body off and light it on fire with a match. As the plastic melts I drip it upon the matress filling until I have stiffened it sufficiently to block all light from the grate and glue the three twines/w cobblestones to it. I lift it towards the grate and use the broomstick to push two of the cobblestones on hairtwine over a bar in the grate. I put the remaining cobblestones into the other mattress cloth and tie them tight and tie a handle out of the remaining cloth . I hold this handle in my teeth. I use the broomstick quietly to put an end of the rope over the loosest noisiest bar and over again and again and under to make a hitch on the bar I can loose from below. I hold the rope taught and use the broomstick to put the third twined cobblestone over and block all light from the room . I feel my way to the door and prop the broomstick against it so that any who enter the room will have to force their way in and when the broomstick gives they will be several feet into a completely dark room. I position myself beside the door opposite the hinges and I grab my cobblestone weapon from my mouth and start pulling the rope making as much noise as possible with the grate to lure my captors into breaking into room A where I will bash their skulls in with cobblestones from behind.

I pick the broom stick the rope the matches and the car. I tear the front and back cloth facings from the matress to have two pieces of cloth. One of these I place matress filler on until light cannot pass through. I collect a fat pile of cobblestones. I pull out my hair and twist it into three pieces of twine I tie a large cobblestone to each piece of twine. I then break part of the car body off and light it on fire with a match. As the plastic melts I drip it upon the matress filling until I have stiffened it sufficiently to block all light from the grate and glue the three twines/w cobblestones to it. I lift it towards the grate and use the broomstick to push two of the cobblestones on hairtwine over a bar in the grate. I put the remaining cobblestones into the other mattress cloth and tie them tight and tie a handle out of the remaining cloth . I hold this handle in my teeth. I use the broomstick quietly to put an end of the rope over the loosest noisiest bar and over again and again and under to make a hitch on the bar I can loose from below. I hold the rope taught and use the broomstick to put the third twined cobblestone over and block all light from the room . I feel my way to the door and prop the broomstick against it so that any who enter the room will have to force their way in and when the broomstick gives they will be several feet into a completely dark room. I position myself beside the door opposite the hinges and I grab my cobblestone weapon from my mouth and start pulling the rope making as much noise as possible with the grate to lure my captors into breaking into room A where I will bash their skulls in with cobblestones from behind.

:headbang:

:headbang:


Ooops I didnt read all the other answers yet.

Ooops I didnt read all the other answers yet.

You like making my head hurt, don't you?

You like making my head hurt, don't you?
Don't we all...;)

I'm going to be a jerk and do this all at once.

3m long rope.
Mouldy block of cheese
Rusty hacksaw.
An empty glass, to be filled with a random nondescript fluid.

You must escape these three rooms within 6 hours:

ROOM A:

It contains a suspiciously soiled matress on the ground, and a small grate near the ceiling allows a tiny amount of light to filter through. The grate isn't large enough to squeeze through, but you could fit an arm through if you could reach and one of the bars were removed, somehow. The walls are slimy and moss covered, and the same is true of the floor. The cobblestones in the floor are somewhat loose, and with no small effort, you could probably remove one, but it would make some noise. A small pit in the corner contains stuff you probably don't want to know about. A wooden door leads to the next room.

I would use the hacksaw, not on the door at large, but around the knob/latch/thingthat'sholdingitshut, assuming that appears possible. Failing that, I would remove a stone from the floor and use it to attack the hinges, if they were on my side of the door. Failing that, I open the mattress (if necessary, with hacksaw or by breaking glass) and use a spring from inside to pry the lock open. Done and done.

Possible losses: hacksaw, glass (replaced with broken glass)
Possible gains: bedspring, doorknob, rock, broken glass

ROOM B:

There is a pool in the middle - it is impossible to tell how deep it is. Aside from a small, unsafe looking moss covered ledge along the left side of the room, it is blocking your path. Several small creatures scurry around in the dark, pausing to nibble on the small clumps of fungi on the edge of the pool. There are some tree roots hanging down from the natural rock ceiling, and a small column of light pierces through a hairline crack in it - this is more detrimental than anything, though, as the bright light coming from this opening isn't enough to light the room and the contrast prevents your eyes from adjusting properly to the dark. The doorway at the opposite end of the room looks to be made of rusty iron.

I use the cheese to lure the critters to me, bashing them to death with rock/hacksaw/broken glass/bare hands. After I have gathered a large collection of them, I tie their little corpses together and fashion myself a life-preserver (corpses float, remember). I slink along the mossy ledge on my butt. If I fall in, the corpses will keep me afloat. Failing this solution, I begin bludgeoning vermin to death and piling them within the pool, until I can walk safely across upon a walkway of dead critters (the smell of dead critters will help this, in that it will attract more live critters to be killed. Failing this, I could always use the broken glass to scrape moss away on the ledge as I move across, possibly using that tree root for balance. Failing even that, I can take a running leap and hope that the bedspring is really, really magnetic. Iffin' that door is locked, I'll have to try prying it open with a bedspring again. If I run out of bedsprings to pick with, rat ribs can substitute.

Possible losses: cheese
Possible gains: lots and lots of rat corpses

ROOM C:

This massive cavernous room contains a gigantic dinner table, with seats and cutlery, set up as if awaiting a banquet - there appears to be food present on the table, but lids cover the plates, so exactly what is being served is unknown to you. Candelebras in the roof provide adequate lighting. A sign next to the door you entered says "please remove shoes." A fishtank with some exotic looking fish is on one side of the room, and on the other, an extremely large and excessively strong looking man stands in front of the exit, blocking your path. He stares ahead blankly and doesn't seem to pay attention to your presence.

Assuming the extremists have left me shoes to remove, I will do so. I will now throw my disgusting, filth-and-rat-blood-covered shoes at the man (failing that, the rock, broken glass, knives from the table, dead rats, etc etc) until he becomes angry and charges at me angrily. I will now run around the iron door, and when he bursts through, I will kill him (I've got a hacksaw, broken glass, a nearby pool of unknown depth, and countless dead rats. If he's not dead, he's at least distracted enough that I can get by). I can now leave at my leasure, and write a book about my horrible ordeal, becoming a millionaire for moments before the PETA people slaughter me in the name of the rats.

Morbid, gross, but effective!

*Long-winded explanation of how to escape*
I bet you fail. ;)

I take:
3m long rope.
Rusty hacksaw.
A compact disc labelled "Greatest Hits of the 80s: Volume Three"
A broomstick.

What I do: check what is under or in the mattress using the hacksaw. Take a spring. Try to examine the pit using the broomstick.

You like making my head hurt, don't you?

No no, that is just an unfortunate side effect of my posting agenda.

I pick the broom stick the rope the matches and the car. I tear the front and back cloth facings from the matress to have two pieces of cloth. One of these I place matress filler on until light cannot pass through. I collect a fat pile of cobblestones. I pull out my hair and twist it into three pieces of twine I tie a large cobblestone to each piece of twine. I then break part of the car body off and light it on fire with a match. As the plastic melts I drip it upon the matress filling until I have stiffened it sufficiently to block all light from the grate and glue the three twines/w cobblestones to it. I lift it towards the grate and use the broomstick to push two of the cobblestones on hairtwine over a bar in the grate. I put the remaining cobblestones into the other mattress cloth and tie them tight and tie a handle out of the remaining cloth . I hold this handle in my teeth. I use the broomstick quietly to put an end of the rope over the loosest noisiest bar and over again and again and under to make a hitch on the bar I can loose from below. I hold the rope taught and use the broomstick to put the third twined cobblestone over and block all light from the room . I feel my way to the door and prop the broomstick against it so that any who enter the room will have to force their way in and when the broomstick gives they will be several feet into a completely dark room. I position myself beside the door opposite the hinges and I grab my cobblestone weapon from my mouth and start pulling the rope making as much noise as possible with the grate to lure my captors into breaking into room A where I will bash their skulls in with cobblestones from behind.

the enter key is your friend.

the enter key is your friend.

Id rather bash in my captors heads for now :p

I'll make a better attempt in a bit, but I liked this idea so I'm running with it.

Hacksaw, remote controlled car, marker, rope.

Saw a bar on the grate loose, pull it out at an angle with the rope, tear my shirt into a strip (hello, ladies...) write "Help, I'm being held prisoner in a strange creepy pit, follow the path of the car." Tie one end to the car and another around the remote, holding the throttle down. Slide the car through the opening and the remote, let it loose, wait for rescue.

Unfortunately, your hacksaw is in such poor condition that it breaks after half an hour of effort. The door is not sufficiently weakened to break through without something else to finish the job.


I start hitting the door with the calculus book.

Do it the way Samus does. Morph into a ball, roll around, and plant a bomb! And then BOOM! Secret area. :)

You have been kidnapped by nondescript extremists and placed in their dungeon of evilness. You are given a chance to escape, and are given a choice of four of these items to take with you:

3m long rope.
Matches.
Mouldy block of cheese.
Rusty hacksaw.
Can of whipped cream.
A barbie doll, minus head.
A compact disc labelled "Greatest Hits of the 80s: Volume Three"
An empty glass, to be filled with a random nondescript fluid.
A broomstick.
A slightly worn "I heart NY" T-shirt
A map of Warsaw city center, written in Polish.
A torch. (flashlight)
Two AA Batteries.
A remote controlled car.
A book about advanced calculus.
A permanent marker.

You must escape these three rooms within 6 hours:

ROOM A:

It contains a suspiciously soiled matress on the ground, and a small grate near the ceiling allows a tiny amount of light to filter through. The grate isn't large enough to squeeze through, but you could fit an arm through if you could reach and one of the bars were removed, somehow. The walls are slimy and moss covered, and the same is true of the floor. The cobblestones in the floor are somewhat loose, and with no small effort, you could probably remove one, but it would make some noise. A small pit in the corner contains stuff you probably don't want to know about. A wooden door leads to the next room.

ROOM B:

There is a pool in the middle - it is impossible to tell how deep it is. Aside from a small, unsafe looking moss covered ledge along the left side of the room, it is blocking your path. Several small creatures scurry around in the dark, pausing to nibble on the small clumps of fungi on the edge of the pool. There are some tree roots hanging down from the natural rock ceiling, and a small column of light pierces through a hairline crack in it - this is more detrimental than anything, though, as the bright light coming from this opening isn't enough to light the room and the contrast prevents your eyes from adjusting properly to the dark. The doorway at the opposite end of the room looks to be made of rusty iron.

ROOM C:

This massive cavernous room contains a gigantic dinner table, with seats and cutlery, set up as if awaiting a banquet - there appears to be food present on the table, but lids cover the plates, so exactly what is being served is unknown to you. Candelebras in the roof provide adequate lighting. A sign next to the door you entered says "please remove shoes." A fishtank with some exotic looking fish is on one side of the room, and on the other, an extremely large and excessively strong looking man stands in front of the exit, blocking your path. He stares ahead blankly and doesn't seem to pay attention to your presence.


So, how do you escape the dungeon? To begin with, tell me which items you are choosing, and one room at a time please. You may progress through one action at a time, or through outlining your entire intended set of actions in the room at once. And remember - this is my dungeon, and I make the rules. None of this "door is made of crumbly plywood" stuff. ;)

First to escape all three rooms wins....something.
Too much effort.-Yes thats right, i'll sit in the corner and eat the cheese.
Did you right this up?

i'll take the r.c. car, the block of moldy cheese, spare batteries for the car and controler, and the perminent marker.

no i'm not saying what i'd do with them over the internet. if i did the evil overloard might be listining in and foil my own plans.

the r. c. loop would of course be asynchronus spread spectrum. the actual controler itself an organic implant, invisible to x-ray and well camoflaged to catscan and similar tecnologies. of course i would also have about my person a dummy conventional looking r.c. controller so as to not draw suspician by it's abscence.

=^^=
.../\...

He ignores you.

"Give me back my sword, NOW."Since he doesn't seem to want to answer questions, I tell him he'll have to try to take it from me.

I'm going for walking out of the first door, making a helicopter-esque arrangement with the rope to cross the pool, beating the bloke in room C to death with the flashlight, all the while wearing the "I love NY t-shirt".

This could take some time...

What does the first person to escape win?

You have been kidnapped by nondescript extremists and placed in their dungeon of evilness. You are given a chance to escape, and are given a choice of four of these items to take with you:

3m long rope.
Matches.
Rusty hacksaw.
Can of whipped cream.

You must escape these three rooms within 6 hours:

ROOM A:

It contains a suspiciously soiled matress on the ground, and a small grate near the ceiling allows a tiny amount of light to filter through. The grate isn't large enough to squeeze through, but you could fit an arm through if you could reach and one of the bars were removed, somehow. The walls are slimy and moss covered, and the same is true of the floor. The cobblestones in the floor are somewhat loose, and with no small effort, you could probably remove one, but it would make some noise. A small pit in the corner contains stuff you probably don't want to know about. A wooden door leads to the next room.
To be fair, I'm not reading the thread to find the solution. but this is what I do.

using the whipped cream as a lubricant and the hacksaw, I will cut out the lock thus opening the door and walking out. Oh, and I take the mattress with me.

This could take some time...

What does the first person to escape win?Yeah, I was wondering this; so far it's undetermined.

Yeah, I was wondering this; so far it's undetermined.

Yes, it is. I'll think of something stupid and totally useless. :)

And I was going to reply to this last night, but I got another database error, so I gave up. Meh. One second...

Yes, it is. I'll think of something stupid and totally useless. :)

And I was going to reply to this last night, but I got another database error, so I gave up. Meh. One second...
*Purposefully refrains from mentioning chocolate
Yay! We might get closure! Might get a themesong too, if we wait long enough...*

In that case I'd like to dig up more cobblestones until I find something that could be construed as useful, and not that sodding note about Johnny getting drunk and losing his key.

The note was a clue. He left his key in the bar. Geddit? :p

After spending an hour digging up cobblestones, you find a metal box buried underneath several of them in the corner.

Inside the metal box, is a mysterious spherical object with a crucifix on top. On the front is a label: Holy Hand Grenade of Antioch.

(happy now? :p)

My plan is working perfectly...:rolleyes:
:p

Does it work, and is there a working remote control with it? Also, what's the battery life like?

Yes, yes, depends.

'save game'

Brandish the Sword threateningly while backing away, "Back up buddy or ill chop you good, look i got the sword and i will give it back just as soon as you answer some questions"

The man pulls out a shorter, but far less rusty sword, and crosses it with your sword. He glares at you threateningly, and waits for your next move...

You didn't reward my ingenuity. :(

*points and laughs*

Ingeniuty isn't always successful, either. ;)

room A: open the door.

room B: swim across.

room C: set fire to the guard with the matches.

The door stubbornly refuses to open. It is locked.

I guess I'll try and learn how to juggle with two of them.
Eventually, you run out of time, and water begins to rush through the grate.

You drown.

If the whole bashing the door thing does work, and assuming I have long enough left, this is what I'll do when I'm in the next room:

Shine torch around to get a better look at my surroundings.

*decides to wait your next room*

Use torch to take a look at the pool - hopefully I'll be able to see below the surface with the light.[/QUOTE]


Alright, Mr. High and Mighty.:p If you don't want ingenious, you can have boring.

I put my wet boot back on. I notice I'm shivering from the cold and realize how damp the air in the room is, from the pool of course and the water seeping in along the roots and through the hairline cracks in the roof and walls. That door didn't get rusty from nothing.
I figure the constant water erosion must have made both the rock and the iron fastenings of the door porous. So I take out my hacksaw and slide it into the crack between wall and door frame and saw at the crumbly rock, trying to either saw the doorframe out of the wall or widen the crack to a gap that's wide enough to squeeze through.

Unfortunately, the hacksaw isn't quite up to the task of sawing through rock, however crumbly, and breaks.

But it seems to be a possible method of escape, if time consuming. Maybe there's something else you can use in the room?

But suddenly, you hear footsteps behind you...
Kanabia, would you mind if I turned this into a little text adventure game sometime?

I won't play at the moment though.

Not unless you work with me, because I was thinking the same thing. ;)

i already found one, used the rope to get across the pool, and confused that giant with the polish map, all while you were gone.

Unfortunately, just before you step outside, you are felled by a congenital heart defect, and die.

I pick the broom stick the rope the matches and the car. I tear the front and back cloth facings from the matress to have two pieces of cloth. One of these I place matress filler on until light cannot pass through. I collect a fat pile of cobblestones. I pull out my hair and twist it into three pieces of twine I tie a large cobblestone to each piece of twine. I then break part of the car body off and light it on fire with a match. As the plastic melts I drip it upon the matress filling until I have stiffened it sufficiently to block all light from the grate and glue the three twines/w cobblestones to it. I lift it towards the grate and use the broomstick to push two of the cobblestones on hairtwine over a bar in the grate. I put the remaining cobblestones into the other mattress cloth and tie them tight and tie a handle out of the remaining cloth . I hold this handle in my teeth. I use the broomstick quietly to put an end of the rope over the loosest noisiest bar and over again and again and under to make a hitch on the bar I can loose from below. I hold the rope taught and use the broomstick to put the third twined cobblestone over and block all light from the room . I feel my way to the door and prop the broomstick against it so that any who enter the room will have to force their way in and when the broomstick gives they will be several feet into a completely dark room. I position myself beside the door opposite the hinges and I grab my cobblestone weapon from my mouth and start pulling the rope making as much noise as possible with the grate to lure my captors into breaking into room A where I will bash their skulls in with cobblestones from behind.

This momentous effort takes you two and a half hours, after which nobody seems to be coming for you. A nice try, and a nicely executed plan, but perhaps a waste of time.

You can keep waiting, or try something else.

(I thought we established that the mysterious captors really don't care about you, since they expect you'll die when the time has expired anyway. ;))

I'm going to be a jerk and do this all at once.

I'm going to be a jerk and give you an epileptic fit.

After spending an hour trying not to choke on your tongue and drifting in and out of consciousness, you begin sawing away around the lock. Your hacksaw blade bends and comes close to breaking, but after an hour and a half of effort, you manage to bust through the door.

You have three and a half hours remaining.

I use the cheese to lure the critters to me, bashing them to death with rock/hacksaw/broken glass/bare hands.

This attempt to lure the critters works, as the smell of the mouldy cheese is somewhat similar to the fungus around the pool. Some strange looking, yet quite large insects come towards you.

Unfortunately, their predators have followed, and you now appear to be surrounded by extremely large, rather aggressive looking spiders.
[/QUOTE]

I take:
3m long rope.
Rusty hacksaw.
A compact disc labelled "Greatest Hits of the 80s: Volume Three"
A broomstick.

What I do: check what is under or in the mattress using the hacksaw. Take a spring. Try to examine the pit using the broomstick.
Inside the matress, you find a large stack of American $2 bills, tied together with an elastic band.

Inside the disgusting pit, you feel something hard at the bottom. It feels heavy, but you have no way of telling what it is.

I'll make a better attempt in a bit, but I liked this idea so I'm running with it.

Hacksaw, remote controlled car, marker, rope.

Saw a bar on the grate loose, pull it out at an angle with the rope, tear my shirt into a strip (hello, ladies...) write "Help, I'm being held prisoner in a strange creepy pit, follow the path of the car." Tie one end to the car and another around the remote, holding the throttle down. Slide the car through the opening and the remote, let it loose, wait for rescue.
It takes you an hour to saw through the bar, and fifteen minutes to set the rest of your plan in motion.

As you set the car through the window, you hear a splash.

Maybe that wasn't such a good idea.

I start hitting the door with the calculus book.

I can see how a calculus book might drive you to do such things, but this has no discernable effect.

I'm going for walking out of the first door, making a helicopter-esque arrangement with the rope to cross the pool, beating the bloke in room C to death with the flashlight, all the while wearing the "I love NY t-shirt".

The door is locked. It refuses to open. ;)

Since he doesn't seem to want to answer questions, I tell him he'll have to try to take it from me.


The man pulls out a shorter, but far less rusty sword, and crosses it with your sword. He glares at you threateningly, and waits for your next move...

(hehe)

*Purposefully refrains from mentioning chocolate
Yay! We might get closure! Might get a themesong too, if we wait long enough...*

Not this week, too much shit to do. Maybe over the weekend.

The note was a clue. He left his key in the bar. Geddit? :p


*Searches around the bars for key*

After spending an hour digging up cobblestones, you find a metal box buried underneath several of them in the corner.

Inside the metal box, is a mysterious spherical object with a crucifix on top. On the front is a label: Holy Hand Grenade of Antioch.

(happy now? :p)

Yes! :D

*points and laughs*

Ingeniuty isn't always successful, either. ;)

Well it should be *pouts* :(

*Searches around the bars for key*

You don't find anything around the bars.

The note was a clue. He left his key in the bar. Geddit? :p
I did, but the key is rather useless to me, seeing as I destroyed the lock.

After spending an hour digging up cobblestones, you find a metal box buried underneath several of them in the corner.

Inside the metal box, is a mysterious spherical object with a crucifix on top. On the front is a label: Holy Hand Grenade of Antioch.

(happy now? :p)
Hell, yes!

Right, here's the plan:

I drop the mattress into the pit, jump down onto it, and pile cobblestones on top of myself. I then activate the holy hand grenade, counteth to 3 (not 2 or 4) and lob it towards the door. Hopefully the cobblestones will protect me from the bad special effects that are required upon the grenade's explosion.

Hell, yes!

Right, here's the plan:

I drop the mattress into the pit, jump down onto it, and pile cobblestones on top of myself. I then activate the holy hand grenade, counteth to 3 (not 2 or 4) and lob it towards the door. Hopefully the cobblestones will protect me from the bad special effects that are required upon the grenade's explosion.

POW!!!

The detonation of the Holy Hand Grenade of Antioch blows the door off it's hinges, and a large crater is in the ground at the location of the blast. You're through to the next room.

But unfortunately, the mattress wasn't quite up to the task of absorbing the putrid goo inside the pit, and your shoes are covered in watery poop. Can't win 'em all.

The man pulls out a shorter, but far less rusty sword, and crosses it with your sword. He glares at you threateningly, and waits for your next move...I step back until I'm against the iron door. Then I try to throw the sword above his head, so he has to reach up and perhaps jump up to get it.

POW!!!

The detonation of the Holy Hand Grenade of Antioch blows the door off it's hinges, and a large crater is in the ground at the location of the blast. You're through to the next room.

But unfortunately, the mattress wasn't quite up to the task of absorbing the putrid goo inside the pit, and your shoes are covered in watery poop. Can't win 'em all.
I think watery poop is the least of my worries, when I have about 3 hours to escape or be drowned.

Anyway.

I climb out of the pit, hauling up the mattress with me. I then pull apart one end of the mattress to remove a spring, but leaving most of the mattress intact. I advance across the crater into the next room.

I'll now use the torch to get a proper look at the second room, including in the pool.

Eventually, you run out of time, and water begins to rush through the grate.

You drown.

I hope my cobble-will wasn't messed up by the rushing water.

You don't find anything around the bars.

*Pulls at bars and loose bricks around them*

Unfortunately, the hacksaw isn't quite up to the task of sawing through rock, however crumbly, and breaks.

But it seems to be a possible method of escape, if time consuming. Maybe there's something else you can use in the room?

But suddenly, you hear footsteps behind you...

:rolleyes: It's just Jello Biafra, fighting with the ghost guy.

Anyway, since I'm not allowed to say who it is, I slide my hand in the pocket of my jacket where I put the permanent marker, grip and point it so that it looks like the barrel of a gun in my pocket, slowly turn around to face the source of the footsteps, and hope that whoever it is bears something I can use to get out of the room.

:rolleyes: It's just Jello Biafra, fighting with the ghost guy.:eek: He's a ghost?!

:eek: He's a ghost?!<.< No idea. I figured he was. *shrug*

<.< No idea. I figured he was. *shrug*
I assumed he was too, otherwise where did he come from?

<.< No idea. I figured he was. *shrug*

I assumed he was too, otherwise where did he come from?I wasn't certain. I thought he might be, or be some magical being. Or, he could have come down from a hidden ladder above the room while I was underwater...of course, that doesn't explain why he kept his sword underwater, but it was a possibility.

I wasn't certain. I thought he might be, or be some magical being. Or, he could have come down from a hidden ladder above the room while I was underwater...of course, that doesn't explain why he kept his sword underwater, but it was a possibility.

I thought he was some kind of spirit, or more likely, a demon. :)

Well, my fellow dungeon escapists, I'll be away until Saturday night - don't anyone dare and get through that iron door before me!

*waves* :)

Well, my fellow dungeon escapists, I'll be away until Saturday night - don't anyone dare and get through that iron door before me!

*waves* :)
Don't worry, I'm sure Kanabia won't let us.

*waves back*

This sounds like something out of a text-based adventure game I played about 15 years ago called Humbug. It were proper weird.<Downloads.>
<Can't get to work.>
<Cries.>

Kanabia! What about me? My make-shift measurer made out of a flashlight and a rope?

<Downloads.>
<Can't get to work.>
<Cries.>
Hmmm...I downloaded it about a year ago, and it worked fine for about a week, then after that crashed my computer whenever I tried to play it. But it is really good, I promise.

Hmmm...I downloaded it about a year ago, and it worked fine for about a week, then after that crashed my computer whenever I tried to play it. But it is really good, I promise.It certainly sounds like it. It wants me to use some other program, and I can't get that program to work because I don't own it. (It wants me to put in a serial number, which I don't have.)

It certainly sounds like it. It wants me to use some other program, and I can't get that program to work because I don't own it. (It wants me to put in a serial number, which I don't have.)
Erm, ok. Where did you download it from? I just got it from here (http://www.grahamcluley.com/humbug.html), and it's working fine...for now.

Erm, ok. Where did you download it from? I just got it from here (http://www.grahamcluley.com/humbug.html), and it's working fine...for now.Yeah, that's where I got it from. My computer didn't recognize the type of files. What program did you use to open it?

Yeah, that's where I got it from. My computer didn't recognize the type of files. What program did you use to open it?
I downloaded it to my desktop, opened it from the Firefox download window, and it came up with a C: prompt window...pressed enter and that disappeared and a load more icons appeared on my desktop.

The first icon was 'humbug50', now I've got that, 'CONFIG', 'HINT', 'HUMBUG.000', 'HUMBUG' (as a Word file), 'HUMBUG' (as an application - that's the game), 'HUMBUG.HNT' and 'HUMBUG.REV'.

I can't use humbug.000, humbug.hnt, or humbug.rev, but I don't seem to need to. That's all I can tell you.

I downloaded it to my desktop, opened it from the Firefox download window, and it came up with a C: prompt window...pressed enter and that disappeared and a load more icons appeared on my desktop.

The first icon was 'humbug50', now I've got that, 'CONFIG', 'HINT', 'HUMBUG.000', 'HUMBUG' (as a Word file), 'HUMBUG' (as an application - that's the game), 'HUMBUG.HNT' and 'HUMBUG.REV'.

I can't use humbug.000, humbug.hnt, or humbug.rev, but I don't seem to need to. That's all I can tell you.Wow, I totally didn't see that icon, and so I assumed that the Humbug.000 was the game. Thank you, I redownloaded it and it works now. :)

Wow, I totally didn't see that icon, and so I assumed that the Humbug.000 was the game. Thank you, I redownloaded it and it works now. :)
:) Enjoy it. It was responsible for hours of frustration in my childhood.

:) Enjoy it. It was responsible for hours of frustration in my childhood.

Sexual frustration.

Zing!


Yay for not-so-subtle sexual commentary!

Sexual frustration.

Zing!


Yay for not-so-subtle sexual commentary!
Yep, I had sexual frustration because of a text adventure game...:rolleyes: :p

Well, that was dumb. I just walked into a raging wall of fire...

I am apparently a finely-manicured beetroot.

Yep, I had sexual frustration because of a text adventure game...:rolleyes: :p

Of course! Cybering with yourself. You nasty dog, you.

Inside the matress, you find a large stack of American $2 bills, tied together with an elastic band.

Inside the disgusting pit, you feel something hard at the bottom. It feels heavy, but you have no way of telling what it is.


I use the CD to reflect light into the pit in order to see more.

An interdimensional rift results in the freezing of spacetime for some 16 hours.

The voice of God booms inside the heads of every living creature: "I AM BUSY. REALITY WILL CONTINUE TOMORROW."

An interdimensional rift results in the freezing of spacetime for some 16 hours.

The voice of God booms inside the heads of every living creature: "I AM BUSY. REALITY WILL CONTINUE TOMORROW."

I don't believe in God.

An interdimensional rift results in the freezing of spacetime for some 16 hours.

The voice of God booms inside the heads of every living creature: "I AM BUSY. REALITY WILL CONTINUE TOMORROW."
That's quite convenient for you, isn't it? :p

Never mind, I've got Humbug now. That'll frustrate me (not sexually, Szanth) until next week at least.

I don't believe in God.

That's okay, because I believe in you. *pats*

That's quite convenient for you, isn't it?

Indeed. ;)

That's okay, because I believe in you. *pats*

:mad: *Bites your hand*

:mad: *Bites your hand*

Silly pet.

That's quite convenient for you, isn't it? :p

Never mind, I've got Humbug now. That'll frustrate me (not sexually, Szanth) until next week at least.

Which step is Denial?

Originally posted here (http://forums.jolt.co.uk/showpost.php?p=11850181&postcount=178).
To be fair, I'm not reading the thread to find the solution. but this is what I do.

You have been kidnapped by nondescript extremists and placed in their dungeon of evilness. You are given a chance to escape, and are given a choice of four of these items to take with you:

3m long rope.
Matches.
Rusty hacksaw.
Can of whipped cream.

You must escape these three rooms within 6 hours:

ROOM A:

It contains a suspiciously soiled matress on the ground, and a small grate near the ceiling allows a tiny amount of light to filter through. The grate isn't large enough to squeeze through, but you could fit an arm through if you could reach and one of the bars were removed, somehow. The walls are slimy and moss covered, and the same is true of the floor. The cobblestones in the floor are somewhat loose, and with no small effort, you could probably remove one, but it would make some noise. A small pit in the corner contains stuff you probably don't want to know about. A wooden door leads to the next room.
using the whipped cream as a lubricant and the hacksaw, I will cut out the lock thus opening the door and walking out. Oh, and I take the mattress with me.
You might have missed this one...

Which step is Denial?
Four, I think...although if I've only managed four steps since the age of 7, I think there might be something wrong.

Hmm. It appears that playing fair leads to death, or at least a squashed nose.

Therefore I shall have to cheat: IDSPISPOPD

I now try and walk through the doors, in order, until I escape. Or sqash my nose.

Originally posted here (http://forums.jolt.co.uk/showpost.php?p=11850181&postcount=178).

You might have missed this one...

He didn't - he responded by saying you broke your saw but suggested you had a decent idea.


From what I remember.

You have been kidnapped by nondescript extremists and placed in their dungeon of evilness. You are given a chance to escape, and are given a choice of four of these items to take with you:

3m long rope.
Matches.
Mouldy block of cheese.
Rusty hacksaw.
Can of whipped cream.
A barbie doll, minus head.
A compact disc labelled "Greatest Hits of the 80s: Volume Three"
An empty glass, to be filled with a random nondescript fluid.
A broomstick.
A slightly worn "I heart NY" T-shirt
A map of Warsaw city center, written in Polish.
A torch. (flashlight)
Two AA Batteries.
A remote controlled car.
A book about advanced calculus.
A permanent marker.

You must escape these three rooms within 6 hours:

ROOM A:

It contains a suspiciously soiled matress on the ground, and a small grate near the ceiling allows a tiny amount of light to filter through. The grate isn't large enough to squeeze through, but you could fit an arm through if you could reach and one of the bars were removed, somehow. The walls are slimy and moss covered, and the same is true of the floor. The cobblestones in the floor are somewhat loose, and with no small effort, you could probably remove one, but it would make some noise. A small pit in the corner contains stuff you probably don't want to know about. A wooden door leads to the next room.

I place the mattress against the door. I strike a match and light it on fire. The mattress and the door burn. fortunately, both rooms are ventilated so I don't suffocate from the smoke. Once the door has collapsed enough for me to walk through, I do so.


ROOM B:

There is a pool in the middle - it is impossible to tell how deep it is. Aside from a small, unsafe looking moss covered ledge along the left side of the room, it is blocking your path. Several small creatures scurry around in the dark, pausing to nibble on the small clumps of fungi on the edge of the pool. There are some tree roots hanging down from the natural rock ceiling, and a small column of light pierces through a hairline crack in it - this is more detrimental than anything, though, as the bright light coming from this opening isn't enough to light the room and the contrast prevents your eyes from adjusting properly to the dark. The doorway at the opposite end of the room looks to be made of rusty iron.

I believe you stated earlier in the thread that the pool of water was shallow enough to cross. In case it is not, I carefully scrape the slippery moss off with the hacksaw, then walk across the ledge.

I then dissassemble the remote controlled car and use a small metallic component to pick the lock on the iron door, if indeed it is locked.

ROOM C:

This massive cavernous room contains a gigantic dinner table, with seats and cutlery, set up as if awaiting a banquet - there appears to be food present on the table, but lids cover the plates, so exactly what is being served is unknown to you. Candelebras in the roof provide adequate lighting. A sign next to the door you entered says "please remove shoes." A fishtank with some exotic looking fish is on one side of the room, and on the other, an extremely large and excessively strong looking man stands in front of the exit, blocking your path. He stares ahead blankly and doesn't seem to pay attention to your presence.


Before I enter, I cover my face with the whipped cream. I then burst into the room, with whipped cream foam around my mouth, screaming my lungs out, brandishing the rusty hacksaw and pure testosterone, with the flames still lingering behind me. If this is unsufficient to impel the guard to move, I begin hurling the cutlery at him, until he collapses from the grievous wounds they will inflict upon him.

He didn't - he responded by saying you broke your saw but suggested you had a decent idea.


From what I remember.

Don't see his response...

Cheater! You know the roof would have been blown to atom-sized pieces. :p

Anyway, in this case I'll choose

- the rusty hacksaw
- the map of Warsaw city center, written in Polish
- the mouldy block of cheese
- the permanent marker


1) First, I screw on the top of the permanent marker real good.
Then, I use the rusty hacksaw to saw through the wooden door. Turns out the door is rickety one-sheet plywood, crumbly from age and the "rust" on the hacksaw isn't rust at all but dried blood covering a brandnew heavy duty saw. Why, how convenient. :)

2) I walk alongside the pool, using the hacksaw to scrape off the slippery moss on the ledge, and get across without any problems.
On the other side of the room, I place the mouldy block of cheese in a corner of the doorway, knock on the iron door and take out my map of Warsaw city center, written in Polish.

3) When the extremely large and excessively strong looking man comes to open the door and points to the sign, I take off my shoes, smile, point at the map, and ask him how for the way to the Louvre.

4) He informs me that unfortunately he doesn't speak Polish either but he's sure the Louvre has to be somewhere in the Old Town, then excuses himself to go back to the exit on the other side of the room.
He stops to sniff the air, looks at me accusingly, mumbles something that sounds like "Not again. I hate this fucking job." and asks me to please put my shoes back on already.

5) I put my shows back on and, apologetically, say he should just change the sign to say "please do not remove shoes" in order to avoid future olfactory incidents. He is taken by the idea but doesn't have a permanent marker to write on the sign with.

6) I give him my permanent marker, and while he arduously pries it open and starts to write on the sign, I have more than enough time to nonchalantly walk over to the exit and out of the dungeon.


Voilà. :)
That is brilliant.

*cries*

WHAT ABOUT ME?!?!

I'm going to become an hero if you don't continue my story...

You know, when I said "Nobody better get through the iron door before me", I only meant "Nobody better get through the iron door before me", not "Everybody stop playing, now!"

*shakes fist at Kanabia* :mad: :(

You know, when I said "Nobody better get through the iron door before me", I only meant "Nobody better get through the iron door before me", not "Everybody stop playing, now!"

*shakes fist at Kanabia* :mad: :(

I'm writing an essay, leave me alone. :mad:

I'm writing an essay, leave me alone. :mad:
Clearly very busy on that essay...:p

Clearly very busy on that essay...:p

Well, it's due last friday.

Well, it's due last friday.

Only last Friday? Oh, why are you even bothering? :p

Only last Friday? Oh, why are you even bothering? :p

:(

:(

Aww, there there. It'll be ok, just start the damned thing already. :fluffle:

Aww, there there. It'll be ok, just start the damned thing already. :fluffle:

I don't like you. You're two-faced and mean. :mad:

pfft...this is easy.

*hides in WYTYG's handbag*:D

pfft...this is easy.

*hides in WYTYG's handbag*:D
Wait, they let me keep my handbag?!

Honey, hold tight in there, we're gonna be out of here in no time.

*macgyvers out of dungeon*

I don't like you. You're two-faced and mean. :mad:

o.O ...

Wait, they let me keep my handbag?! It seems that way, but there mustn't be anything in it if SHAOLIN9 can fit inside.

It seems that way, but there mustn't be anything in it if SHAOLIN9 can fit inside.
Ah, apparently you've never seen my handbag (http://akiralee.wordpress.com/files/2006/06/HERMES.jpg). :cool:

o.O ...

Yeah, you heard me.

...

<.<

:fluffle:?

Yeah, you heard me.

...

<.<

:fluffle:?

:fluffle: I forgive too easily...

this thread must not turn into a fluffle-fest.

Wait, they let me keep my handbag?!

Honey, hold tight in there, we're gonna be out of here in no time.

*macgyvers out of dungeon*

Woo-Hoo!

I win the thread by association! But since I cheated You win!

It seems that way, but there mustn't be anything in it if SHAOLIN9 can fit inside.

Pfft....I'm an amoeba, I can fit anywhere.

Ah, apparently you've never seen my handbag (http://akiralee.wordpress.com/files/2006/06/HERMES.jpg). :cool:

*stretches out and lays down amazed by all the space*

*sets up home*;)

*changes location*

this thread must not turn into a fluffle-fest.

Why not? It's my thread and I can do what I want with it. :fluffle:

aaaaaaand i'll get back to it just as soon as my essay is done

this thread must not turn into a fluffle-fest.

:fluffle: If Kanabia says it can, I sanction it. ;)

:fluffle: If Kanabia says it can, I sanction it. ;)

As do I.

:fluffle: :fluffle:

*fluffles through the iron door to the third room*

Why not? It's my thread and I can do what I want with it. :fluffle:

aaaaaaand i'll get back to it just as soon as my essay is done

well, since you are goe, i will hijack it back to the original topic, because fluffles suck.

<Has picnic with cloaked dude until Kanabia comes back.>

yay flufflez

:fluffle: