NationStates Jolt Archive

Geeze ... I can tolerate being a loser ... I wouldn't want to go through life as a failure.

Killing yourself is overrated anyway. Nobody gives a shit 2 minutes after you're dead. However, if you do it, webcast it and make it loud and messy. That would be awesome. Give me the copyright in your will.


:D

Yeah, I even said I have had suicidal thoughts. And trust me, an existence which is merely to keep others from suffering emotional trauma is hardly a good one at all. To you that may sound selfish, yet is it? Should a person merely exist to keep others happy, even if they are drenched in misery? Do you think killing yourself, going against very human nature is something easy to do? Some people become so desperate they see it as the only way out.

Brilliantly put. I've lived in that state for a very long time, and it isn't fun. When you live only because you don't want to cause others the pain of losing you, you've already died.

As you can see, I am still a member of the ungratefull living.

I hate myself because I'm a total fake, and I'm cold and heartless...my friends don't call me the Anti-Cupid for nothing.
I feel as if I'm stuck in an everlasting, forever looping memory.

My mom got pretty pissed last time I told her about the suicide thing, and my grandma and brother don't believe in suicide or depression. They blame it on me for not being optimistic enough. That it's my fault.

Perhaps it is. But it still leaves me with the unpleasant feeling that they aren't going to face it, and they'll shun me.

After all, I was supposed to be the perfect child.

Here's something for you to think about. If you are a total fake and cold and heartless, either you are a fake about being cold and heartless, or you are cold and heartless and put on a happy front for the world. In the first case, you are a very good person and put up a front to avoid getting hurt. In the second case you are exactly what society wants/expects you to be because they are complete asses.

Personally, I think everyone who wants to kill themselves should. And what's more, they should leave the rest of us the frag out of it. Failed suicide is a desperate reach for attention. Successful suicide is someone finally having the balls to make something of their pathetic existance. Which would you rather?

People who screw up suicides are already plenty angry enough about not even being able to get THAT right without idiots like you adding to it. You want "desperate reach for attention" - go serial killer...attempted suicides...seriously attempted suicides are something much more. With an attitude like that, I pray you never have children.

Whos being selfish?

Posting this kind of thing, is purely and simply...a cry for attention.
Why else would anyone do it?
Certainly, little to no good will be obtained by this person from anything anyone of us will post.

So, then... if we know that it is indeed such a cry, then we can also be sure its false in nature.
No one who is truly suicidal bothers to ask people they dont know for such advice, on a web forum.

Why did I bother to post?

When I see crap, I cant help but speak out.

Suicide is the most selfish act of all, not calling out some gothy-emo drama.

Wrong on many counts. First, people who are suicidal generally know that it isn't normal, and especially after a failed attempt. I don't care what else you've done, nothing is as frusterating as trying to end your life and failing. Second, getting advice from strangers is often the easiest road to take emotionally. There is no connection so condemnation isn't taken as personally, and you can get points of view and advice that people who are closer might react too strongly to provide. This is why therapists have jobs. It's because talking to strangers is easier than talking to friends or family about many things, and depression and suicide happen to be among them. Finally I will argue that suicide is not the most selfish act there is, bringing a child into the world is. I could expand on that point, but it would take far longer than I feel is appropriate for one post.

Wrong on many counts. First, people who are suicidal generally know that it isn't normal, and especially after a failed attempt. I don't care what else you've done, nothing is as frusterating as trying to end your life and failing. Second, getting advice from strangers is often the easiest road to take emotionally. There is no connection so condemnation isn't taken as personally, and you can get points of view and advice that people who are closer might react too strongly to provide. This is why therapists have jobs. It's because talking to strangers is easier than talking to friends or family about many things, and depression and suicide happen to be among them. Finally I will argue that suicide is not the most selfish act there is, bringing a child into the world is. I could expand on that point, but it would take far longer than I feel is appropriate for one post.

Agreed

Silence and Nothing:

I just have a few things to say to you. Don't kill yourself. You may feel like you do not deserve to live, but find something you are good at. Keep persuiong your education, no matter how pointless you consider it, or read something you like, something instructive. Educate yourself that way. You might discover something about yourself that might change the world for the better, or something on a much smaller scale. No matter how small, every person that exists contributes something. YOu will find someone you love, find something you are good at. It will make it worth living when you do.

My sister was born before me, she was my parents' favorite. She got the best grades, went to the best universities, now she is a lawyer in the U.S. When asked about her brother, the can they say about me? I am a very good shot. I excell at weapon modification and repair. What else? I work at a chain store even though I went through university. I was supposed to surpass my sister in my parents' eyes. I was just not cut out for it. Eventually, when I got mugged and almost killed by rogue policemen, as soon as I came home I put the Makarov 9mm I owned under my chin and pulled the trigger, but I forgot to load the magazine. After that, I felt better about life and met my third girlfriend after the second left. When the time came, I had to serve in the army as everyone in Russia does. I left my girlfriend to go and start my long, rigorous 2 year service. I got a letter from a friend along with pictures one day. In addition to being depressed as hell because of the monotonous surroundings, constant suicides at the base and the basic troubles of Russian life, the pictures of my girlfriend fucking my boss made me stick the barrel of the AK-74 in my mouth one late night. My few friends that I made while serving at the base had to pry it out of my arms, resulting in a round going off and making a hole the size of a half-dollar in one of my friends' hands. After that, I met Masha, my current girlfriend. I have been with her for three years now, and had no problems. Suddenly buisness was looking up for me, and I found out that I am really good at writing. Now I am planning to go back to Los Angeles to apply for a position at the company my brother-in-law works for to write a storyline for a game that I had been wanting to make for seven years. It's possible to get out of a depressing, suicidal frame of mind. I guess it's just a phase in life. Of course I had some days when I had to drink two 3-liter vodka bottles to keep from jumping in front of a subway tram, but other than that, I am happy now.

Posting this kind of thing, is purely and simply...a cry for attention. Why else would anyone do it? Certainly, little to no good will be obtained by this person from anything anyone of us will post.
So, then... if we know that it is indeed such a cry, then we can also be sure its false in nature. No one who is truly suicidal bothers to ask people they dont know for such advice, on a web forum. Why did I bother to post? When I see crap, I cant help but speak out.

Thank You.

Thank You.

It's something you'd never understand, but if you feel better by supporting bashing someone emotionally distraught or clinically depressed then by all means go ahead. Because after all that's what a good person does.

-snip-

That's very sad, but even after all that life still got better.

It's something you'd never understand, but if you feel better by supporting bashing someone emotionally distraught or clinically depressed then by all means go ahead. Because after all that's what a good person does.

People can be awful, no?

People can be awful, no?

I'm just wondering what these people are doing here when all they have to do is not open the thread.

I'm just wondering what these people are doing here when all they have to do is not open the thread.

No offence intended. I was wondering the same thing.

I'm just wondering what these people are doing here when all they have to do is not open the thread.

Some people need to put other people down in order to feel good about themselves. The people who present the easiest targets are often those who least need it.

A desperate cry for attention?
Is not everything you do in life some way to get attention? When you talk to your friends on the phone, did you not call them? Or perhaps they called you. Did the sound of the phone not get your attention?
When you post on the internet it is always a "Look at me!" sort of feeling for anyone. You don't post "Hey, how 'bout dem cowboys?" because you really want to let the world know how much you enjoy watching their games on TV, but more than anything you want to bring attention to yourself, as if to say "Tell me about how great they are" or "Go ahead and try to bash them" everything a person does is for attention.
And selfishness is something you're born with. When you were born you were always "I want, I want, I want, I want." right? You want food, you want toys, you want attention. You have to learn to shed off some of your selfishness as you grow older, but keep some in order to keep yourself alive. Everyone must remain selfish in order for life to remain.
As for my "not wanting to die badly enough", fear is a powerful emotion. Fear can cause you to stop doing something you once loved.
Fear can cause you to kill someone.
Fear can stop you from killing yourself. It's called simply "Fear of the unknown" or even "fear of God" and sometimes, in a more blunt sense, "fear of death".
Every suicidal man, woman or child regrets having killed themselves when they feel death set in, I'm sure of it. But most of the time rational thought is blocked when you believe that life is not going to get better, and you can't think...you can't allow yourself to think that you might regret it.
Live your life with no regrets. Thats impossible. You will always regret something, and for me, it was posting on this forum.
I knew someone would come up here and call me a coward. I knew someone would call me an attention whore. I even knew that people would tell me to kill myself. But I was not prepared to hear that I'm nothing but a copy cat and I need to be more "original".
How original must I be to be acceptable to you?! Must I have tried to kill myself 28 times, and then succeded?! Must I have tried to kill myself by downing a tube of toothpaste?! (floride can kill you...)
I don't need to be acceptable to you. If you want to come up here and call me a fake, go ahead. I know that already.
But don't you dare tell me to be more original. If you're so desensitised to others problems, then stop going on forums and stop listening to people. People are nothing but problems personified.
Which one are you?

Personally, I just think you'd be better off dead. But that's just me. Of course, I also prefer more definite ways of killing myself. When I go, if I go, I'll blow my own brains out, thanks.

<snipped for length>

I just thought of another reason for you not to kill yourself. You're really good at putting people in their place, a skill that is in short supply ;-)

Wowo, a sarcastic and seemingly clever response! That provides no help whatsoever. This girl needs advice, not apathetic responses like this. If you're not here to give her constructive and kind advice, go spam up another fucking forum. Its people like you, with your one-liners and pearls of wisdom nearly made me top myself long ago...Wow, what self-righteousness. And, ironicly, contributing zilch to the topic at hand.
I'm sorry you fail to understand my point, but there was one, and it wasn't to seem sarcastic or clever, that's just a bonus. Suffice it to say it was a thought from the time I was depressed and wishing to simply not exist (If you want to die, you're not thinking things through. In the worst case you'll reincarnate and have to muddle through another worthless lifetime, however short you cut it.) It's just one of the little straws I grasped at, pulling myself through my bothersome existence, hoping there were better times to come. And there were.

*generic whine*

Eesh, make up your mind, are you killing yourself or not? If no, okay then, get along with your life, maybe a therapist or something, just quit it....eesh...We can't do anything, we hardly care anymore.

I just thought of another reason for you not to kill yourself. You're really good at putting people in their place, a skill that is in short supply ;-)

Oh yeah, she told us, we got 1337 haxx3d by her ub3r-sk1llz.

It's something you'd never understand, but if you feel better by supporting bashing someone emotionally distraught or clinically depressed then by all means go ahead. Because after all that's what a good person does.

Eh, "good person" is overrated, better a rational person, less complicated.

Eh, "good person" is overrated, better a rational person, less complicated.

I'd rather travel the road less walked if that means I don't have to follow in the footsteps of your ilk.

I'd rather travel the road less walked if that means I don't have to follow in the footsteps of your ilk.

Trust me, rational, much less traveled. Number of travlers has nothing to do with where the road leads.

Trust me, rational, much less traveled. Number of travlers has nothing to do with where the road leads.

The more travelers the less the people question where the road takes them. Rationality, like all things, must be moderated otherwise we'll be nothing more than cold calculating machines.

The more travelers the less the people question where the road takes them. Rationality, like all things, must be moderated otherwise we'll be nothing more than cold calculating machines.

Eh, rationality's not done bad to us when used right, let's wait till cold calculating machines have a couple of world wars, then we'll let our emotions decide everything. The machines are probably better than us anyways. And seriously, wasn't that poem about choices in life or something?

Wow, what self-righteousness. And, ironicly, contributing zilch to the topic at hand.
I'm sorry you fail to understand my point, but there was one, and it wasn't to seem sarcastic or clever, that's just a bonus. Suffice it to say it was a thought from the time I was depressed and wishing to simply not exist (If you want to die, you're not thinking things through. In the worst case you'll reincarnate and have to muddle through another worthless lifetime, however short you cut it.) It's just one of the little straws I grasped at, pulling myself through my bothersome existence, hoping there were better times to come. And there were.

I'm sorry. I totally misunderstood your point.
I had just been reading the most appalling responses to this thread, and thought youes was another of those from people who do not know what SilenceandNothing is going through.

When I was depressed, I had a quaote similar to that one sorta flung at me, in a sarcastic tone, and I guess I cant hear it any other way. People were always quoting stuff at me, like saying it in a bored tone, or with a certain haughtiness made it so fucking profound....

Im sorry. I have made other, more constructive comments on this thread, that one was just me losing my grip on my temper a little.

I'm sorry. I totally misunderstood your point.
I had just been reading the most appalling responses to this thread, and thought youes was another of those from people who do not know what SilenceandNothing is going through.

When I was depressed, I had a quaote similar to that one sorta flung at me, in a sarcastic tone, and I guess I cant hear it any other way. People were always quoting stuff at me, like saying it in a bored tone, or with a certain haughtiness made it so fucking profound....

Im sorry. I have made other, more constructive comments on this thread, that one was just me losing my grip on my temper a little.

Well, you're apparently still here...

A desperate cry for attention?
Is not everything you do in life some way to get attention?

You're good at writing. In response though.. no, everything shouldn't be for attention. Things should be done because you enjoy them, or they bring joy to others. Or something along those lines. If you do everything for attention, I think that may be why you're depressed. Try doing stuff for real reasons and you may start to see what life's really about. And by the way, life only gets better if you make it better and start seeing the positive in things. Life doesn't just magically get better all of a sudden because you're in high school or get a new car. The power rests in your attitude. Attitude is all that we control. Life won't get better until you want it to and think it into being. Nobody can hand happiness to you. You need to find it within yourself. It's not external.

Yups. Attention-whoring's got nothing to do with most things.

Maybe you'd be doing yourself a favour if you just forgot about getting attention for a while, and started doing something interesting instead.

There must be things you enjoy or that intrigues you. Seek it out. Interesting things rarely happen in people's homes. If you want to be a race car driver, then go find a circuit. If you enjoy Hc, start going to concerts & start a band. If you think Bruce Lee is the shit, learn kung-fu. If whales are you thing, start taking some biology courses & get involved with some eco groups.

In short; go do something. If you don't know what, simply pack some shit & keep walking in a random direction until something interesting happens. Or get a job on a boat.

Eh, rationality's not done bad to us when used right, let's wait till cold calculating machines have a couple of world wars, then we'll let our emotions decide everything. The machines are probably better than us anyways. And seriously, wasn't that poem about choices in life or something?

Too much rationality leads to a bland existance. A nice balance between reason and passion should work out correctly. Machines may be better but they still don't experience joy, they just..progress.

Too much rationality leads to a bland existance. A nice balance between reason and passion should work out correctly. Machines may be better but they still don't experience joy, they just..progress.

Eh, There's more than one way to solve a math problem, existence would only become bland when we know everything, and there is no longer any possible logical reason to dissent. As is, everyone could be completely rational, but still disagree, because there remain certain things we don't know.

P.S. And it's not like we remove emotions, just don't utilize them for decision making or logical deductions...still plenty reason to feel, just remove the usually not quite helpful practice of being controlled by feelings.

P.P.S. Geez, is this how I think sometimes? I'm weird.

So many people are so ready to sneer... they should consider what it might feel like for your mind to turn against you and stick daggers of guilt and shame into your being. To those who have never felt that at some time in their life, I'd suggest a little bit of sympathy. Depression is a disease, and only sometimes can willpower even hope to act as a cure.

Eh, There's more than one way to solve a math problem, existence would only become bland when we know everything, and there is no longer any possible logical reason to dissent. As is, everyone could be completely rational, but still disagree, because there remain certain things we don't know.

True that rationality is absolutely useful but it doesn't cover all of existence. My emotions though they draw away from reason give me a good amount of strength and power.

P.S. And it's not like we remove emotions, just don't utilize them for decision making or logical deductions...still plenty reason to feel, just remove the usually not quite helpful practice of being controlled by feelings.

Once again true but in the case of this thread I feel compassion should play some role in it.

P.P.S. Geez, is this how I think sometimes? I'm weird.

Not wierd just philisophical, I thought I was wierd until I started reading Plato and Decartes. Decartes is one confusing sob.

Depression is a disease, and only sometimes can willpower even hope to act as a cure.

It's a state of mind, a way of looking at the world. It's self-taught and self-sustained. And nothing but a change in outlook will cure it.

So many people are so ready to sneer... they should consider what it might feel like for your mind to turn against you and stick daggers of guilt and shame into your being. To those who have never felt that at some time in their life, I'd suggest a little bit of sympathy. Depression is a disease, and only sometimes can willpower even hope to act as a cure.

Well, if SaN isn't dead yet, I figure we don't have much to worry about her killing herself. If there's actually a problem, which she can apparently recognize, she shouldn't be spouting to random forum-goers, she should be spouting to a therapist.

It's a state of mind, a way of looking at the world. It's self-taught and self-sustained. And nothing but a change in outlook will cure it.

Clinical Depression is actually well documented and studied diesease.

It's not that I don't want to die, it's that I don't have the courage to do so.
Taking your own life...at the same time cowardly, yet it takes more courage than you think. Oh, and the absence of happiness and rational thought.

Clinical Depression is actually well documented and studied diesease.

I don't think this is clinical depression. It seems like the self-satisfying kind. However, you're right. Hormones and neurotransmitters do play a role.

It's not that I don't want to die, it's that I don't have the courage to do so.
Taking your own life...at the same time cowardly, yet it takes more courage than you think. Oh, and the absence of happiness and rational thought.

well then, we're on to something, you're lacking in rational thought, this is clear to us all (you, who say so, the "cold heartless side" because if you'd consider killing yourself you lose most claims to rational thought, and the side indulging your attenion whore tendencies, because it's a well-documented disease, depression) So, here's rationality for you. Shut up and go to a therapist.

Well, if SaN isn't dead yet, I figure we don't have much to worry about her killing herself. If there's actually a problem, which she can apparently recognize, she shouldn't be spouting to random forum-goers, she should be spouting to a therapist.
And what is up with this therapist crap? I don't have a lot of money to throw at some random Joe who will listen and nod for 3 hours.

I don't think this is clinical depression. It seems like the self-satisfying kind. However, you're right. Hormones and neurotransmitters do play a role.

I forgot the name of it but that's when people fake diseases for the pity of others. Damn it's on the tip of my tongue...

And what is up with this therapist crap? I don't have a lot of money to throw at some random Joe who will listen and nod for 3 hours.

aren't you some emo teenager? get your parents to throw money, If this is really a problem and youre actually a fraid of killing yourself, you'd find a way or something.....so....1) therapy, 2) get over the emo and attenion whoring, 3) kill yourself and be done with it.

I forgot the name of it but that's when people fake diseases for the pity of others. Damn it's on the tip of my tongue...
Munable's (sp?) syndrome? I'm pretty sure I don't have that.

Munable's (sp?) syndrome? I'm pretty sure I don't have that.

Try hypochondria. And a trip to the doctor for some hormone therapy.

Try hypochondria. And a trip to the doctor for some hormone therapy.
Hypochondria is different. It's when you constantly think you are in a terrible state of health.

Hypochondria is different. It's when you constantly think you are in a terrible state of health.

Right. And this isn't physical it's mental. Heck if I know what to call it..

I'm so glad that you all seem to think that I'm some sort of suicidal clock chime.

And what is up with this therapist crap? I don't have a lot of money to throw at some random Joe who will listen and nod for 3 hours.

I'll listen for three hours. I wont even nod.

I'm so glad that you all seem to think that I'm some sort of suicidal clock chime.

I'm trying hard to think that you're any type of suicidal at all.

I forgot the name of it but that's when people fake diseases for the pity of others. Damn it's on the tip of my tongue...

Munchausen’s Syndrome?

i know how u feel...i was in ur place once... my friends saved my life and hey life sukcs but it sucks more for ur friends who find out u killed urself and they didn't stop u

I'll listen for three hours. I wont even nod.
I'm not even sure if that was sarcastic or serious.

I'm trying hard to think that you're any type of suicidal at all.
You make me feel so warm and fuzzy inside. Like one of those baby seals they club to death.

I'm not even sure if that was sarcastic or serious.


I'm never sarcastic. Never.


Ok I'm always sarcastic, but not when it comes to serious things like suicide. I would listen to you talk even though I dont know you from Adam.

You make me feel so warm and fuzzy inside. Like one of those baby seals they club to death.

http://www.petatv.com/tvpopup/video.asp?video=fur_farm&Player=wm&speed=_med

I would listen too.
You have a very fluid way of writing, which tells me you are not making things up on the spot,and you're completely comfortable with the little narrative voice in your head.
These are strengths-you are a good conversationalist, and very good at defending yourself.
You need an outlet. When we get older, there's times when we tire of things, or simply 'grow out' of them. Im guessing if you're depressed, as I and some of the other people on this thread were/are, you've lost interest in most of your hobbies. Things like Backgammon or Hockey or even Gardening seem freaky and outlandish to you, probably. And 'socialising' doesnt count, although I guess you're not getting all that you could out of this area.
Find an outlet, however bizarre it may be-wether its drawing, Japanese dolls, 1960's black and white movies or cruddy romance novels-something that provokes a response from you, wether its positive or negative.
Dont think about the future-dont think about your future job, your future friends, your future house etc...its not the future, so forget all that. If you're feeling like you've nothing to live for, Im guessing you're feeling a little anxious about where your life is heading.

I have no magic words to make you feel better. There is rarely that one moment when somebody (therapist, friend, parent) says a sentence that suddenly clarifies your whole existence and lifts your spirit.
Strangely, contact with strangers can provide the best lift-choosing to air your frustration and despair with total strangers can only help, as they cannot 'sugar-coat' things because they love you, because actually they don't.
That doesnt mean we don't like you-I like you, and I havnt a clue what you look like, Im guessing your a teenager at High school, or what your name is, or what music you like or hate, what TV programmes you would never admit an addiction to...

Like I said, no magic words. But there's no such thing as magic, really. And dont think that one conversation that makes you feel better will sure you-I have fallen into many black holes over the past years, and am eternally grateful for all the kindness people have shown me, and the understanding.

Why do you feel your life isnt worth anything? Are you feeling ignored? Whose attention do you really want? Ours? Your parents? A certain somebodies? Have you lost interest in everything?
I don't believe you have Muchausens, or are some 'emo' kid sitting in her lovely bedroom at her high-performance, expensive computer in a posh house. If you were, I dont think any of that stuff around you means a great deal to you, you're so unhappy.

Please dont take the responses on this forum as gospel. Don't run a poll of who is 'for' your death and who is 'against' as this is unfair on yourself.
You deserve better. If you can't talk to your parents, try a tutor? Its usually the most unlikely one that can help you.
But keep trying your parents-they love you, no matter what you do, and even if it takes time, eventually they will realise you're in trouble and do their best to help.

Munchausen’s Syndrome?

That sounds right.

After reading all 21 pages of response I'm compelled to reply, but first I'll just get this out of the way: I'm appalled at the arrogance of some of the people who have posted in this thread. I'm not usually moved to say anything about how awful people are but honestly, what is wrong with some of you. If everything is a joke to you, including someone killing themselves, all I can say is that some day you're going to get a huge wake-up call and it's not going to be nice. At least, not nice for you. It'll be nice for the rest of us when you realize how awful you have been so far in your life.

Anyway, Silence and Nothing - I, like some percentage of the people here, am glad that you are still around to angrily defend yourself. I obviously don't know you, but you still mean something to me.

Why? Because you are a good person and you are strong willed. You don't have to answer to anyone – only to yourself. Most people aren't able to do that and it's a great thing that you are probably already appreciating – I feel like you've already started to overcome all this.

Perhaps you feel like a fake – a huge percentage of people in high school are “fakes”, or “phonies” if you will. It's easy to fix, though, especially if you're as strong as I think you are. All you need to do is be true to yourself. I know it sounds stupid, but it's true. At this point in your life you don't need to concern yourself with other people.

Of course who am I to say this, we still don't really know what's driving you to want to kill yourself, but I think I do remember you saying you felt fake. I was going to tell you the whole story of myself in late middle school and early high school and how I got rid of my self-consciousness and became true to myself, but whatever. You don't need to hear my story. The point is you've got the ability to overcome this and become a great person.

Rather than just say “find something that interests you to occupy yourself”, I'm going to make some direct suggestions if you don't mind.

You've got a great ability to express yourself clearly in writing. In your profile you say you like to draw anime. Well, there you go – author a manga and express your feelings through it. Make yourself the main character, or make completely different characters. Whatever. You don't have to show it to anyone else – you're doing this for yourself.

Your profile also says you like singing. Many people won't admit it, but everyone likes singing. Doesn't have to be in front of anyone, I personally am frightened by the thought of singing or shouting or anything like that if there's a chance someone might hear. However singing is a great way to release yourself and feel good, and I do it by myself all the time. And who knows? Maybe you could write your own songs. Again, doesn't have to be something anyone else ever has to see or hear.

And lastly, it says you like reading. Reading is a great way to get by as a human being. Getting wrapped up in books is one of the greatest things you can do for yourself. Good books, anyway. I've always found that a good book will take me away from everything and let me forget about myself and where I am in my life.

So basically, here's what I suggest. Draw a manga, and read some good books. Watch the movie Ikiru. Live your life for what it is - and be yourself, and you'll be fine.

Well, if SaN isn't dead yet, I figure we don't have much to worry about her killing herself. If there's actually a problem, which she can apparently recognize, she shouldn't be spouting to random forum-goers, she should be spouting to a therapist.

Have you ever seen a therapist? I daresay that those of us on here actually trying to be supportive are more helpful than many of the "experts" I've seen.

You make me feel so warm and fuzzy inside. Like one of those baby seals they club to death.

Wow...now that made me feel all warm and fuzzy inside. And now to all the people who feel the need to be critical and judgemental, I've got something your parents should have taught you at some point in time. If you don't have anything nice to say, stfu.

Blatant attention whoring.

Nothing more.

Blatant attention whoring.

Nothing more.

Even if it is attention whoring, isn't the fact that SaN wants/needs the attention something to care about...?

If you don't think this thread is worthwhile then don't post. Otherwise, SaN should be taken seriously. True, we can't actually see into her life, but how hard is it to be encouraging to someone who needs some love? I'd rather take the chance of having a stranger on the other side of the world laugh at me cause i'm gullible than not take someone's life seriously.

*hands cookie to Maegi*

SaN::fluffle: y'know you always have people on here that can talk if you want to

Sigh. Suicide sucks. Just makes people unhappy. Overrated.

Even if it is attention whoring, isn't the fact that SaN wants/needs the attention something to care about...?

If you don't think this thread is worthwhile then don't post. Otherwise, SaN should be taken seriously. True, we can't actually see into her life, but how hard is it to be encouraging to someone who needs some love? I'd rather take the chance of having a stranger on the other side of the world laugh at me cause i'm gullible than not take someone's life seriously.

*hands cookie to Maegi*

SaN::fluffle: y'know you always have people on here that can talk if you want to

Sweet, cookies! And seconded

I woke up this morning feeling like shit again, the last time I felt this way was a while ago. Anyway I feel happy knowing that I'm not alone in this aspect.

My friend was seriously hurt in a car accident and I kind of feel bad for leaving home and going so far away. My other friend wants to kill himself because the girl he loves has some "pictures" with other men, and now my fourth closest friend is planning on going to my rival college. *sigh* bastards. It's also about time my oldest german sheppard be put to sleep, my parents say his seizures are getting horrific. Also heard I'll need surgery on my arm because the muscel is calcifying or whatever, yay!

I want to punch life in the face sometimes, but whatever it only sucks for a bit then it gets better.

I want to punch life in the face sometimes, but whatever it only sucks for a bit then it gets better.

Exactly what I tried to say. I got mugged on friday and had to shoot a human being for the first time, shocking experience, even while in the army I never shot anyone. My girlfriend left for Kaliningrad, so that is also making me feel really depressed. I locked up all my guns in order to prevent myself from accidentally putting one in my mouth and pulling the trigger. This has been a horrible month.

And with Velentine's day around the corner, it's gonna get even worse. Just ingore everything and do what Tatouinn said, that's some vey good advice, better than my feeble attempt at least. Well, I guess it's time to drink some more vodka. See ya guys around.

I locked up all my guns in order to prevent myself from accidentally putting one in my mouth and pulling the trigger.

I'm just glad I wasn't around any guns when I was younger and serious about my fate. More than likely I wouldn't have done it but there's always that chance. A steak knife is definately not the best way :p

I've never felt that much better with a relationship no matter how great. I had an excellent girlfriend, lover, and listener but I still felt so unsatisfied. I only feel fufilled when I have some kind of power or respect. I'm now devouting my life to getting to top and maybe then when I have everything I could ever want, I'll end my life and I'm willing to sacrifice everything to get what I want.

It's all about finding a purpose in life really.

I'm glad that more and more ass holes are leaving the thread to those who care a bit more.
But you asked what my reasons were. Well, I can't tell you all of them...but one of them is definetly my humanity. I hate being human, I hate having emotions. Every tear that has ever streaked down my face is more and more proof that I'm human, that I am infact weak.
More than anything that fact was proven when I tried to kill myself.
I've become the suicidal clock chime. I chime and chime quietly in hopes that someone will notice that I'm hurt, but few people do, and I lose hope.
I came to the internet for an unbiased opinion, in hopes that someone would suggest something I haven't heard yet.
Haven't heard that one yet.

Wow...now that made me feel all warm and fuzzy inside. And now to all the people who feel the need to be critical and judgemental, I've got something your parents should have taught you at some point in time. If you don't have anything nice to say, stfu.
I attack in defense only. ~.^

You've got a great ability to express yourself clearly in writing. In your profile you say you like to draw anime. Well, there you go – author a manga and express your feelings through it. Make yourself the main character, or make completely different characters. Whatever. You don't have to show it to anyone else – you're doing this for yourself.
<cut!>
Watch the movie Ikiru.
Let me read you all a bedtime story (And I've never heard of Ikiru, what's it about?):
Once upon a time there was a princess.
Every night she would cry herself to sleep
And every morning she would wake up crying silently to herself.
But she never let anyone see how sad she was for she had to remain strong for her kingdom.

Night after night, she continued to cry.
And day after day she continued to wear the fake smile she always wore for her people.

She never showed anyone how much she hurt because she knew it would hurt them as well.
She continued to cry every night.
Eventually she became sick of crying and wanted to put a stop to it.

She visited an old witch to ask her how to be happy.
The witch laughed at her answer and gave her a bottle of strange smelling liquid.
"Drink it all" she commanded, "And you will be happy."

So that night the princess opened the bottle and drank all of the contents.
But within a few minutes she had passed out on the floor and her people were hurriedly trying to make her all better again.

When she awoke her people rejoiced, but still she was not happy.
But she remembered a dream she had soon after drinking what was in the bottle.
The witch had told her in her dream that one man had made her unhappy.

So she sent her knights off in search of that man.
When she found him, she found that she did not have the courage to kill him.
Soon she was never without him, and he was never without her.

And still she was unhappy.
For you see, she only had someone to talk to about it, not someone who could solve it.

Yet again she visited the old witch.
"It is your age my dear..." She replied when the princess asked her again why she wasn't happy.
So the princess left her kingdom for 3 years, in hopes that as she matured her unhappiness would go away.

But when she returned, she had still not found happiness.

She asked the man "Why am I not happy?"
And he replied "I don't know."
And again she went to bed and cried herself to sleep.

By this time her unhappiness was known to all her people,
But not to the king or queen.
The reason for this was not because they did not care,
But because they were blind to everything that caused them pain.

The princess visited the old witch for the last time.
"Please tell me how to be happy, so that my people will not suffer."
And the witch replied with a horrible laugh "Your death is all that can bring joy to your people."

The princess believed these words to be true, and locked herself in her room with yet another bottle of strange liquid.
"Drink it all..." she whispered to herself and drank it in one big gulp.

The next morning, her people awoke to find the princess sleeping peacefully.
But there was something wrong.

She would not wake up.

Her people tried and they tried but nothing worked.
One day a man suggested that they offer a prize to anyone who can wake the princess up and make her happy once more.

One by one, people came with solutions.
But none of them worked, no matter how many times they tried.
Some gave her beautiful gems, but she would not wake up.
Others gave her wonderful food.
And still she slept on.

And one day the man who had caused her unhappiness stood up and declared
"I know what can make her happy"
And he left the kingdom in search of it.
But he never returned, and she slept on.

And to this day, she still sleeps
For no one has found her happiness.
But you see, her people will never find her happiness.
Only the princess can find her own happiness.
Now let me guess what your response will be...
"That sucked. You should never write again."
Heh, I didn't write it for your enjoyment. If I had I would have edited it first before posting.

I couldn't really be bothered to read all 11 pages... but here's my advice.

Don't kill yourself. Do you have any idea how lucky you are? Huh? There's a 1 out of ten chance you are born in the rich, Western society. You got that chance. 10%. There's a 90% chance you are born in a poor, undeveloped country were you have no freedoms, no-one gives a shit if you exist or not, you have very little to eat and life sucks in general. Your life: Food, home, parents, rights, protection, firends.
The life the odds were you should have got: Miserable, little food, little water, no rights, no protection, no parents, generally horrible.

Think a bout that before you think life sucks. You have one of the hbest lives on the planet. At least in the top 5 million.

It makes me mad to see people from rich countries with a thosuand possibilites to do what they want and not what they need whine and want to kill themselves. There. I ranted.

I attack in defense only. ~.^

You're so good at it though. Your story is an accurate reflection of some people's lives, and I think that there are people who will recognize themselves in it.

The story, is that pretty much symbolic of how you feel? That no one can make you happy? That you are the only one who can find what it is that you lack? I gather you dont feel in control of your life or emotions. Emotions arent always easy to harness. They run freely and go from one extreme to the other. Are there any unresolved issues that you might need to address? Any catastrophic events? Pain from the past? Do you have any ideas of the source of your pain? May I ask why you hate being human aside from your statement of "it makes you weak''? A lot of questions I know, but I'm just trying to gather some information in order to offer more productive posts.

I'm glad that more and more ass holes are leaving the thread to those who care a bit more.
But you asked what my reasons were. Well, I can't tell you all of them...but one of them is definetly my humanity. I hate being human, I hate having emotions. Every tear that has ever streaked down my face is more and more proof that I'm human, that I am infact weak.
More than anything that fact was proven when I tried to kill myself.
I've become the suicidal clock chime. I chime and chime quietly in hopes that someone will notice that I'm hurt, but few people do, and I lose hope.
I came to the internet for an unbiased opinion, in hopes that someone would suggest something I haven't heard yet.
Haven't heard that one yet.

You know the funny thing about the people who tell me they are weak is that they are usually some of the strongest people I know. Everyone at some time and to some degree wishes for the relief of death. Everyone. We all face hardship. We all face drama. We all feel misunderstood and unloved at times. We all cry.

But here's the rub... we all have joy. We all laugh. We all have good luck and good times. Including you.

My bet is that you have a chemical imbalance that's making you incapable of looking at life on the level. That's generally the difference between the 'weak' ones and the 'strong' ones.

Your brand of trauma isn't better or worse than anyone else's because they'll never experience yours and you'll never experience theirs. It doesn't matter if someone else's trauma is somehow seemingly worse than yours because your pain scale is calibrated to your experiences. That's the bad news, but it's the good news too. Because it plays both ways. The good events in your life are what set the good side as well. And there have been good events and there will be again.

Go to a doctor. Get help. Medication sucks. All of it. But for a lot of people it helps you see the world as you were meant to see it. And when you do, you'll look back at this and be glad your prayers for death were not answered.

There's lots of ridiculous advice in this thread. But there's lots of good advice too. You need human interaction, not just a bunch of words on the screen. Show the strength we all know you have and go and get help. And when you're feel better come back and tell us about it so we can all rest easy, because I don't know about everyone else, but I'll be worried for you.

Not only have I dated a girl in your exact situation (from what I could piece together as what your situation would be) but I've also been in it myself, somewhat.

It's a crappy feeling. It's a self-digging hole. I know.

All I can really tell you to do is wait it out. Things really will get better as life goes on. I told her, I told myself, I'm telling you: Life sucks when you're a teenager. You're going to feel depressed regardless. Trust me when I say the rest of your life is going to get better, especially if you find someone to share it with.

Till then, don't listen to depressing music, don't hang out with shitty people, don't drink and don't do drugs (m'kay). Divert your attention.

I think I saw someone say something along the lines of "Nothing is more frustrating than trying to end your life and failing" - obviously this man has never played MegaMan 2. Really, though, just play assloads of video games. Preferably old-school Nintendo, but if you really want to then go ahead and play some next-gen stuff, too. Mostly action/sidescrolling will occupy you while keeping you from being depressed. RPG's tend to not work so well, especially in the next-gen games.

A good FPS can have the same effect, but honestly it's just a personal preference with the MegaMan games. Even in the X series for SNES it's awesome, albeit not as effective at distracting and undepressing.

Soon, enough time will pass by, and enough robots will have been destroyed, and enough thinking will have been adjusted and fixed to where your life's not so bad, and instead of trying to OD on random crap and hurt -yourself-, you'll instead end up imagining yourself taking a buster cannon to your mom just so you'll be able to absorb the ability "Bitch fit blaster", and we all know Metal Man is weak against that attack.

The story, is that pretty much symbolic of how you feel? That no one can make you happy? That you are the only one who can find what it is that you lack? I gather you dont feel in control of your life or emotions. Emotions arent always easy to harness. They run freely and go from one extreme to the other. Are there any unresolved issues that you might need to address? Any catastrophic events? Pain from the past? Do you have any ideas of the source of your pain? May I ask why you hate being human aside from your statement of "it makes you weak''? A lot of questions I know, but I'm just trying to gather some information in order to offer more productive posts.
Symbolic? For the most part, yes. Though I will be the first to admit that I did change things because they sounded better (for example: I would never call myself a princess, but saying "A princess and her people" sounds better than "A high school girl and her friends"). And yes, for a little while I did think I was unhappy because I had a crush on someone and when I told them how I felt they didn't love me back. But then I realized that it couldn't possibly be the reason because it was stupid that my life would feel ruined just because some guy rejected me.
And for 3 years I didn't do anything after my first attempt. Bearing with what I could, I just wore a mask around to hide how I was feeling.
And I don't really cry everyday, just way too much.

And my emotions make me weak. It's my humanity that I hate, and it's my intelligence and the people around me and the fact that I live in a country where the expectations are high and we're expected to keep our mouths shut.
And where inmates get better treatment than you on a normal basis.

Symbolic? For the most part, yes. Though I will be the first to admit that I did change things because they sounded better (for example: I would never call myself a princess, but saying "A princess and her people" sounds better than "A high school girl and her friends"). And yes, for a little while I did think I was unhappy because I had a crush on someone and when I told them how I felt they didn't love me back. But then I realized that it couldn't possibly be the reason because it was stupid that my life would feel ruined just because some guy rejected me.
And for 3 years I didn't do anything after my first attempt. Bearing with what I could, I just wore a mask around to hide how I was feeling.
And I don't really cry everyday, just way too much.

And my emotions make me weak. It's my humanity that I hate, and it's my intelligence and the people around me and the fact that I live in a country where the expectations are high and we're expected to keep our mouths shut.
And where inmates get better treatment than you on a normal basis.


Despite no longer belonging here considering all the "assholes" have been removed for the more emotional type. You obviously have a grasp on a major point. Life sucks. but the whole, "emotions make me weak thing"....True, essentially, but something every person has to deal with, being weak, in any way shape or form is no good reason to kill yourself. As far as hating you're humanity.....well....not much you can do there....kill yourself and you'll just be a human corpse, stay alive, living human. Don't want humanity? Get a processor for a brain.

I couldn't really be bothered to read all 11 pages... but here's my advice.

Don't kill yourself. Do you have any idea how lucky you are? Huh? There's a 1 out of ten chance you are born in the rich, Western society. You got that chance. 10%. There's a 90% chance you are born in a poor, undeveloped country were you have no freedoms, no-one gives a shit if you exist or not, you have very little to eat and life sucks in general. Your life: Food, home, parents, rights, protection, firends.
The life the odds were you should have got: Miserable, little food, little water, no rights, no protection, no parents, generally horrible.

Think a bout that before you think life sucks. You have one of the hbest lives on the planet. At least in the top 5 million.

It makes me mad to see people from rich countries with a thosuand possibilites to do what they want and not what they need whine and want to kill themselves. There. I ranted.
Am I to assume that you’re from far away?
Those numbers don’t sound right. If you’re talking about the western hemisphere, then I guess it’s still a slight possibility, but those numbers still don’t add up since the US doesn’t take up 10% of the western hemisphere. If you’re referring to western culture (which includes Europe and a few other countries from those areas) then those numbers really don’t add up.
Last time I checked Europe isn’t totally impoverished. Yes there are some countries, but there are larger major countries that not only hate the US, but are not 3rd world and run the risk losing parents to random bombings or catastrophic plagues. Am I to assume that you are from one of these countries? But why assume? You know what they say, assuming only makes an ass out of you and me.
Don’t tell me how bad I have it and don’t tell me how good I have it. You cannot prove that I even live in the US; you can’t prove that I have both of my parents; you can’t even prove if I’m a high school girl. The servant knows no worse master until he has had one, so you can’t tell me to buck up just because the country I live in is rich. It’s not as if my home life doesn’t play a role in my happiness as well.
No matter how rich a country is they can never improve something like how your family treats you or how many friends you have or whether or not you’re having a relationship with someone who loves you as much as you love them.
You might live in a country where people are starving to death, and yes it is bad, but if you have people who love you it makes all the difference. I could give you all I have, because it’s nothing. It’s an empire of dirt. I could give it to a little kid in some 3rd world country you’ve never heard of and they would spit on it and send it back.
The computer I have is a ’95, the speakers don’t work, and the USB ports are the wrong size for me to plug in a new printer, which btw is a black and white printer, my computer is too old for me to transfer school work onto because this was before the time when programs like PowerPoint and Excel came standard.
Don’t expect me to be happy because there are people worse off than me, because that just makes me feel worse. Everything I do and will ever do is going to be based on what I have to work with and whether or not I believe that it’s the right thing to do, or even, if I’m feeling particularly lazy, whether or not I feel like doing it.
I’m not going to be happy because there are people starving to death, and we can at least afford enough ramen to give us one meal a day for a week.
Maybe this is a very ignorant and American way to see it, but I think that if you are living just above poverty level in your own country, then you shouldn’t be forced to worry about countries half way around the world. You should mow your own yard before you mow your neighbors, even out of selflessness. As I said earlier, you have to be selfish to a point to live.
And stop telling me America is so great. Yeah I live here. And that is why I am allowed to say that America has its faults.
The media doesn’t feel like its doing its job unless it’s constantly scaring the hell out of you, or reporting only yellow journalism.
Our first amendment rights are not obeyed in places such as schools, homes, or government offices. We are not allowed to say whatever we want if you can be suspended for 10 days just for saying a racial slur (not that I’m saying that he was right in saying so, but just that hate is a choice.). *sigh* But this is a subject for another thread.

I'm glad that more and more ass holes are leaving the thread to those who care a bit more.
But you asked what my reasons were. Well, I can't tell you all of them...but one of them is definetly my humanity. I hate being human, I hate having emotions. Every tear that has ever streaked down my face is more and more proof that I'm human, that I am infact weak.
More than anything that fact was proven when I tried to kill myself.
I've become the suicidal clock chime. I chime and chime quietly in hopes that someone will notice that I'm hurt, but few people do, and I lose hope.
I came to the internet for an unbiased opinion, in hopes that someone would suggest something I haven't heard yet.
Haven't heard that one yet.

The following is not intended to cheer you up. This may not be a completely objective opinion, but it does come from years of people watching. Humanity does suck. People are horrible and cruel to each other, and it is rare to find those who actually care beyond just a surface level. I personally believe that your hatred of being human speaks very highly of your moral character. Emotions are the bane of our existance, and yet the reason for it. All you can do with your life is to learn. If you come away from life with nothing more than thinking "I could do better than this" and have ideas how, that is enough. I won't go deep into religion(since mine is considered heretical or insane by most people) but learning truly is enough, even if you don't like any of the lessons you learn. You are not alone...I don't like any of the lessons I've learned either.

I think I saw someone say something along the lines of "Nothing is more frustrating than trying to end your life and failing" - obviously this man has never played MegaMan 2. Really, though, just play assloads of video games. Preferably old-school Nintendo, but if you really want to then go ahead and play some next-gen stuff, too. Mostly action/sidescrolling will occupy you while keeping you from being depressed. RPG's tend to not work so well, especially in the next-gen games.

A good FPS can have the same effect, but honestly it's just a personal preference with the MegaMan games. Even in the X series for SNES it's awesome, albeit not as effective at distracting and undepressing.

Soon, enough time will pass by, and enough robots will have been destroyed, and enough thinking will have been adjusted and fixed to where your life's not so bad, and instead of trying to OD on random crap and hurt -yourself-, you'll instead end up imagining yourself taking a buster cannon to your mom just so you'll be able to absorb the ability "Bitch fit blaster", and we all know Metal Man is weak against that attack.

I agree...video games are a wonderful bandaid, and I have played (and beat) most of the final fantasy games. I personally have a thing for RPGs, but I will agree that old school is better here. Recently I've taken to MMORPGs, specifically World of Warcraft, because it allows very selective interaction, and you can meet some really nice people. Anybody who isn't, you can just ignore. If you're going for nice visuals though, definately go with the new RPGs...taking a blaster to someone is entertaining...picturing a dragon laying waste to a group of people is priceless. And yes I am aware that this entire post was pointless and rambling, and I don't care.

This is getting increasingly absurd.

Obviously some of you people wouldn't know real depression if it bit you in the ass. I'm not talking about standard teen angst or a case of the blues. I'm talking about severe clinical depression.

I'm severely bipolar and have tried several times. Twice seriously. The not so serious times were not necessarily attention seeking. I merely decided to leave the sucess or failure of the venture up to fate. I wasn't sure I wanted to die, but I sure as hell didn't want to go on as I was.

People don't blame people with serious painful and terminal physical illnesses for su1c1de . Depression can be just as painful, and it certainly feels like you're dying. Suffering forever is not noble. Depression effects your perception of things. You believe it will go on forever.su1c1de seems eminently reasonable.

But depression need not be permanent. Even though I still suffer from serious, paralyzing bouts of depression, experience has taught me it will get better. I take my meds and hang on until things look up. The depressive phases are shorter and there are no more su1c1de attempts.

There are treatments that work. If your parents aren't helpful try one of the community mental health clinics.






EDIT: the stupid public library computer I'm on filter out the word su1c1de

Obviously some of you people wouldn't know real depression if it bit you in the ass. I'm not talking about standard teen angst or a case of the blues. I'm talking about severe clinical depression.

I'm severely bipolar and have tried several times. Twice seriously. The not so serious times were not necessarily attention seeking. I merely decided to leave the sucess or failure of the venture up to fate. I wasn't sure I wanted to die, but I sure as hell didn't want to go on as I was.

People don't blame people with serious painful and terminal physical illnesses for su1c1de . Depression can be just as painful, and it certainly feels like you're dying. Suffering forever is not noble. Depression effects your perception of things. You believe it will go on forever.su1c1de seems eminently reasonable.

But depression need not be permanent. Even though I still suffer from serious, paralyzing bouts of depression, experience has taught me it will get better. I take my meds and hang on until things look up. The depressive phases are shorter and there are no more su1c1de attempts.

There are treatments that work. If your parents aren't helpful try one of the community mental health clinics.






EDIT: the stupid public library computer I'm on filter out the word su1c1de

Yes, that is my experience as well (I'm not depressed but I know people who are/were). People don't realize that it's effect is to disallow you the ability to look at certain things about the world in the way a person who is not depressed would. Depression often has very little to do with the events in your life improving and more to do with the internal balance improving (either through diet or medication or excercise or all three). I think the things people had to say in this thread are appalling and it's unfortunate that people don't have a better understanding about the effect of a disease that affects so many people in this world.

Tell a depressed person to just suck it up or die is like telling paralyzed person to stop being a wussy and walk up the stairs.

I agree...video games are a wonderful bandaid, and I have played (and beat) most of the final fantasy games. I personally have a thing for RPGs, but I will agree that old school is better here. Recently I've taken to MMORPGs, specifically World of Warcraft, because it allows very selective interaction, and you can meet some really nice people. Anybody who isn't, you can just ignore. If you're going for nice visuals though, definately go with the new RPGs...taking a blaster to someone is entertaining...picturing a dragon laying waste to a group of people is priceless. And yes I am aware that this entire post was pointless and rambling, and I don't care.
Video games are awesome!
The last game I played and beat would be...Silent Hill 3. I'm currently working on Xenosaga Episode II (I timed it. Of the first 3 hours of gameplay, you can only actually play for 45 minutes, and it's only for a boss fight.)

This is getting increasingly absurd.
Who's absurd?

Tell a depressed person to just suck it up or die is like telling paralyzed person to stop being a wussy and walk up the stairs.
Can I use that?

Can I use that?

Of course. Tell people that the person who coined it is really good-looking though.

Man, this place is alive.

ahahahahahahahahhahah ahaha hahah ahhhhhhhhh... god I love myself.

Life is a gift. As far as I can see, it is the only gift you will ever get. All things good stem from life, and therefore life itself is good. Without life there is nothing. Since you have life, and since you will eventually die anyway, you might as well live life, take what you can from it and die when your time comes. I tried to kill myself once. It opened my eyes. Just feeling, living, breathing, these are all magnificent things. Open your eyes, live life, look to the good, and mabye find some religion that intrests you, or a hobby, something that gives purpose. Or just try meditiation. Love live and lift. You'll be fine.

Video games are awesome!
The last game I played and beat would be...Silent Hill 3. I'm currently working on Xenosaga Episode II (I timed it. Of the first 3 hours of gameplay, you can only actually play for 45 minutes, and it's only for a boss fight.)

I beat Xenosaga Episode I, and got Episode II when it came out only to be thoroughly underwhelmed. FFX2 was a much better sequel imo.

Life is a gift. As far as I can see, it is the only gift you will ever get. All things good stem from life, and therefore life itself is good. Without life there is nothing. Since you have life, and since you will eventually die anyway, you might as well live life, take what you can from it and die when your time comes. I tried to kill myself once. It opened my eyes. Just feeling, living, breathing, these are all magnificent things. Open your eyes, live life, look to the good, and mabye find some religion that intrests you, or a hobby, something that gives purpose. Or just try meditiation. Love live and lift. You'll be fine.

It's all a matter of perspective. I believe bringing a child into the world is the cruelest thing that anybody will ever do to them, which is why parents spend the next 18 or so years taking care of them to make up for it. I do have one thing I live for though...I believe that I will live to see the end of the world, and I find that interesting. If I die without something earth-shattering happening, I will be very disappointed.

It's all a matter of perspective. I believe bringing a child into the world is the cruelest thing that anybody will ever do to them, which is why parents spend the next 18 or so years taking care of them to make up for it. I do have one thing I live for though...I believe that I will live to see the end of the world, and I find that interesting. If I die without something earth-shattering happening, I will be very disappointed.
Meh, I'll see it eventually.

Suicide is not the answer! :(

Suicide is not the answer! :(
Thank you for your deep knowelegeable input.
Want to elaborate? Because words are useless when you don't have a backup.

How do you fail to kill yourself? You aren't struggling to evade a murderer or something. If you "try" to kill yourself and fail you are just trying to get attention. Remember "Across the street for attention. Down the road if you mean it."

Here's a page that explains how to do it properly:
http://www.thebestpageintheuniverse.net/c.cgi?u=manly_suicide

You want some wisdom?

Here it is, from someone who has at one time, or another been diagnosed with clinical depression, and been on 4 different kinds of anti-depressants. (at different times of course)

The wisdom:

You have two choices...

1. Stop the perpetual whining, "waaahh...poor me", and find the help you need. This means no more drama-filled threads seeking all the attention you can find from random names on the internet.

2. Roll over and die.

Thats it.

Nothing is going to change until you (any person who is depressed) decide to ultimately live or die.
To live, you have to get whatever help you need.
If you dont want to always feel like shit everyday, the only person who cant fix that is you.

I'll tell you what, kill me and then do as you please with yourself.
Or just zip it.:)

I'll tell you what, kill me and then do as you please with yourself.
Or just zip it.:)
Why not? I'm going to hell anyway...*sharpens knife*

Most people committ suicide because they have a completely distorted view of reality. They have allowed themselves to blow their emotions completely out of proportion and have lost control over their perception of reality.

OP- Get a Grip! You're problems aren't that bad, try looking at your problems from someone else's perspective and they won't seem so bad or so significant. Realize that you are wealthy compared to most people who have lived, very fortunate, and don't have any problems worth whining over.

DON'T LET YOUR EMOTIONS CONTROL YOUR REALITY!!!!

The worst mistake anyone can make is to allow their worldview to be shaped by their emotions! Use rational thought to analyze the world, not emotional drivel, learn to doubt what you one believed, learn to view your situation objectively! Learn to do this and you will not only see yourself realistically, but the world, and that is an invaluable asset.

Sigh...I think there are billions of reasons to live. Probably billions of reasons to kill yourself.

But what do you gain from death? Pretty much nothing. You can't be certain what lies after death is any better than what is now.

Ms. Nihilist? I shall address you as such for you seem to have nihilist tendencies which you would like to overcome. Your will is impressive and I admire your writing abilities. Continue with them, I found poetry to be an extremely valuable asset in this society that praise freedom of speech yet stifles every expression of the will as 'overly emotional.' A resentful mockery of the souless.

What exactly is your frustration with? The world? Yourself? the others? I am curious. 'Hell is other people.'

Is it the values that you hold? that values the world holds? the values society holds? Where our priorities lie?

If you answered this before I apologize, I did my best to read through this. I still can't believe the extraordinarily large amount of assholes that plague this forum.

Happiness? Only happiness? Is that what you want? In my psych class during college we learned that the feeling of happiness could be induced simply by forcing a smile on ones face (similarly a frown induces anger, a saddened face sadness) Anyone can be happy nowadays, all you have to do is put a smile on your face. But I can tell, this advice is weak and useless. Is this happiness, a momentary emotion? I would go deeper than that, I don't think this is what you want.

Am I to assume that you’re from far away?
Those numbers don’t sound right. If you’re talking about the western hemisphere, then I guess it’s still a slight possibility, but those numbers still don’t add up since the US doesn’t take up 10% of the western hemisphere. If you’re referring to western culture (which includes Europe and a few other countries from those areas) then those numbers really don’t add up.
Last time I checked Europe isn’t totally impoverished. Yes there are some countries, but there are larger major countries that not only hate the US, but are not 3rd world and run the risk losing parents to random bombings or catastrophic plagues. Am I to assume that you are from one of these countries? But why assume? You know what they say, assuming only makes an ass out of you and me.
Don’t tell me how bad I have it and don’t tell me how good I have it. You cannot prove that I even live in the US; you can’t prove that I have both of my parents; you can’t even prove if I’m a high school girl. The servant knows no worse master until he has had one, so you can’t tell me to buck up just because the country I live in is rich. It’s not as if my home life doesn’t play a role in my happiness as well.
No matter how rich a country is they can never improve something like how your family treats you or how many friends you have or whether or not you’re having a relationship with someone who loves you as much as you love them.
You might live in a country where people are starving to death, and yes it is bad, but if you have people who love you it makes all the difference. I could give you all I have, because it’s nothing. It’s an empire of dirt. I could give it to a little kid in some 3rd world country you’ve never heard of and they would spit on it and send it back.
The computer I have is a ’95, the speakers don’t work, and the USB ports are the wrong size for me to plug in a new printer, which btw is a black and white printer, my computer is too old for me to transfer school work onto because this was before the time when programs like PowerPoint and Excel came standard.
Don’t expect me to be happy because there are people worse off than me, because that just makes me feel worse. Everything I do and will ever do is going to be based on what I have to work with and whether or not I believe that it’s the right thing to do, or even, if I’m feeling particularly lazy, whether or not I feel like doing it.
I’m not going to be happy because there are people starving to death, and we can at least afford enough ramen to give us one meal a day for a week.
Maybe this is a very ignorant and American way to see it, but I think that if you are living just above poverty level in your own country, then you shouldn’t be forced to worry about countries half way around the world. You should mow your own yard before you mow your neighbors, even out of selflessness. As I said earlier, you have to be selfish to a point to live.
And stop telling me America is so great. Yeah I live here. And that is why I am allowed to say that America has its faults.
The media doesn’t feel like its doing its job unless it’s constantly scaring the hell out of you, or reporting only yellow journalism.
Our first amendment rights are not obeyed in places such as schools, homes, or government offices. We are not allowed to say whatever we want if you can be suspended for 10 days just for saying a racial slur (not that I’m saying that he was right in saying so, but just that hate is a choice.). *sigh* But this is a subject for another thread.

I see you've developed a healthy scepticism to the 'Noble Truths' of America. I am glad you have made an assualt on altruism, caring about everyone, that is caring about people we have no direct contact with is not only unwise but unhealthy. It goes against our nature, and with it against life.

It is well that you have this scepticism, but I warn against a dogmatic cynicism and nihilistic tendencies. There are countless people out there, in here that will destroy a beautiful lie and ruin a life in the name of truth. Do not become these little people running about the world in a desperate and futile attempt to kill God.

You said you are playing Xenosaga? I've played both and found them the single most entralling and in-depth videogames I've ever played (the first was far superior to the second). Might I suggest you look into the books they were named after if you haven't yet? Der Wille Zur Macht (The Will to Power) and Janseits vom Gut und Bose (Beyond Good and Evil) both written by a long dead philosopher named Friedrich Nietzsche. You have the intelligence and power to handle him.

And when you finish the game please TG me what you thought of it.

Most people committ suicide because they have a completely distorted view of reality. They have allowed themselves to blow their emotions completely out of proportion and have lost control over their perception of reality.

OP- Get a Grip! You're problems aren't that bad, try looking at your problems from someone else's perspective and they won't seem so bad or so significant. Realize that you are wealthy compared to most people who have lived, very fortunate, and don't have any problems worth whining over.

DON'T LET YOUR EMOTIONS CONTROL YOUR REALITY!!!!

The worst mistake anyone can make is to allow their worldview to be shaped by their emotions! Use rational thought to analyze the world, not emotional drivel, learn to doubt what you one believed, learn to view your situation objectively! Learn to do this and you will not only see yourself realistically, but the world, and that is an invaluable asset.

I love it when people leave themselves wide open like this.
A) Everyone's perception of reality is distorted, which is why life is subjective. There is NO "objective reality". Deal with it.
B) Do not presume to tell anybody else that their problems "aren't that bad" because everyone is able to deal with different problems. Maybe something that would bother you she would laugh at.
C) Anybody who says that other people don't have problems worth "whining over" should do the rest of the world a favor and kill themselves, because we have plenty of heartless bastards already, and one less would be an improvement.
D) Emotions are reality. All of human existance is tied up into emotions, and to deny such shows a lack of understanding of the human condition.
E) If I have not yet made you feel sufficiently stupid, please let me know and I will tear apart your criticism some more.

I love it when people leave themselves wide open like this.
A) Everyone's perception of reality is distorted, which is why life is subjective. There is NO "objective reality". Deal with it.
B) Do not presume to tell anybody else that their problems "aren't that bad" because everyone is able to deal with different problems. Maybe something that would bother you she would laugh at.
C) Anybody who says that other people don't have problems worth "whining over" should do the rest of the world a favor and kill themselves, because we have plenty of heartless bastards already, and one less would be an improvement.
D) Emotions are reality. All of human existance is tied up into emotions, and to deny such shows a lack of understanding of the human condition.
E) If I have not yet made you feel sufficiently stupid, please let me know and I will tear apart your criticism some more.
Thank you from the bottom of my heart for proving realtivity instead of leaving me to do it instead.

But don't worry, I do have one very long post cooking up for anyone I might dispoint with small and simple sentances.

To the original poster: Grow up. It isn't by hurting or even killing yourself that you're going to gain other's attentions. At least not in the way you think. "Look at me, I'm sad". Boo fucking hoo. There are probably millions of people that are having a worse time than you are and they're just gonna keep on and wait for better times or just change their lives.

Being depressed might be a disease. You go to a fucking psychiatrist and they give you drugs that make you feel better with yourself, without "getting you high".

Still, if you think that killing yourself is a better option than having some fucking BALLS (or whatever) and fight the adversity, then you might as well kill yourself and be nominated for the Darwin Awards.

Thank you from the bottom of my heart for proving realtivity instead of leaving me to do it instead.

But don't worry, I do have one very long post cooking up for anyone I might dispoint with small and simple sentances.

I can't very well let you have all the fun now can I? Relativity is a pretty simple concept...it's more sad than anything else that people don't get it.

To the original poster: Grow up. It isn't by hurting or even killing yourself that you're going to gain other's attentions. At least not in the way you think. "Look at me, I'm sad". Boo fucking hoo. There are probably millions of people that are having a worse time than you are and they're just gonna keep on and wait for better times or just change their lives.

Being depressed might be a disease. You go to a fucking psychiatrist and they give you drugs that make you feel better with yourself, without "getting you high".

Still, if you think that killing yourself is a better option than having some fucking BALLS (or whatever) and fight the adversity, then you might as well kill yourself and be nominated for the Darwin Awards.

It really is too bad that assholes like you don't listen.

I pray that you never have children because if you did I'm very sure that they will have problems and all you'll do is tell them to stop whining and die.

I'm not depressed to get drugs you retard. There are much easier ways to get high than feign illness.

And this is not for attention. It does not count for anything if a bunch of people on the internet pretend to care. They care for the wrong reasons, they don't care because they love me and I'll be missed, they pretend to care because I'm a life floating out in the nothingness of cyberspace that is threatening to kill herself. No one cares about me or my life here, they just care that they might look like a better person in others eyes if they saved someone from taking the plunge.
I went to the forums because it's completely confidential. I don't have my E-mail, AIM, MSN, Yahoo IM or any other way to contact me in this forum site, so people can't really care. It was my decision to not allow people to care for the right reasons, and assholes like you blow it out of proportion because you live in your own mud puddles.

And this is not for attention. It does not count for anything if a bunch of people on the internet pretend to care. They care for the wrong reasons, they don't care because they love me and I'll be missed, they pretend to care because I'm a life floating out in the nothingness of cyberspace that is threatening to kill herself. No one cares about me or my life here, they just care that they might look like a better person in others eyes if they saved someone from taking the plunge.

The only reason I offered you support is because I too get suicidal at times. Not to look a better person or anything. Don't assume everyone is self-interested to that degree.

The only reason I offered you support is because I too get suicidal at times. Not to look a better person or anything. Don't assume everyone is self-interested to that degree.
Sorry, but it is hard to believe that people who don't know me really care about my future and life.

Sorry, but it is hard to believe that people who don't know me really care about my future and life.
Yeah I know it is, but not everyone is doing it because they want to look good. I definitely am not. As I said, the reason I offered my support was because I realise what you're going through, unlike people who have not had suicidal thoughts.

Sorry, but it is hard to believe that people who don't know me really care about my future and life.

You would be suprised by the people who care about people they've never met before.

Yeah I know it is, but not everyone is doing it because they want to look good. I definitely am not. As I said, the reason I offered my support was because I realise what you're going through, unlike people who have not had suicidal thoughts.
Sorry if I have affended you, but it's still a hard concept to wrap my brain around.
You don't have to care about me, I'm just some random person on the internet. Why would you care?

Sorry if I have affended you, but it's still a hard concept to wrap my brain around.
You don't have to care about me, I'm just some random person on the internet. Why would you care?
I can't say I really do, except that it would be a shame for you to go through this alone. I find it hard to care about people around me, let alone those online. I am merely expressing and offering solidarity. And don't worry, you didn't offend me. I am just clarifying my stance.

I am happy I'm not emo

Man people need to get over the whole stigma surrounding emo. If you're emo, embrace it and be fuckin' proud of it, it's who you are. Don't let assholes tell give you shit about it. And this is coming from a punk/hardcore kid.

besides, not all emo music is bad. Listen to Jawbreaker, Lifetime, and Hot Water Music and then come tell me emo sucks.

Sorry, but it is hard to believe that people who don't know me really care about my future and life.

When a situation is brought into the forefront of one's mind the question shouldn't "How could they care?" but rather "How couldn't they care?" Every single poster here from the assholes to the gods have put thought, time, and interest into your situation.

I love it when people leave themselves wide open like this.
A) Everyone's perception of reality is distorted, which is why life is subjective. There is NO "objective reality". Deal with it.
B) Do not presume to tell anybody else that their problems "aren't that bad" because everyone is able to deal with different problems. Maybe something that would bother you she would laugh at.
C) Anybody who says that other people don't have problems worth "whining over" should do the rest of the world a favor and kill themselves, because we have plenty of heartless bastards already, and one less would be an improvement.
D) Emotions are reality. All of human existance is tied up into emotions, and to deny such shows a lack of understanding of the human condition.
E) If I have not yet made you feel sufficiently stupid, please let me know and I will tear apart your criticism some more.

A. A society can't function if everyone has a different concept of the world. I must agree that logically all we have is our individual perceptions, but this alone doesn't offer us the information we need to act, thus we all make a few assumptions that allow us to act. These assumptions allow us to form a common view of the world from our individual perceptions that is as close to knowledge and objectivity that we can get.
B. Of course this is truly subjective, but surely she has some capacity to control her emotions. Surely she is able to stop herself from emphasizing the problem in her own thoughts. Surely she can put the problem in perspective to minimize the emotional pain it causes her.
C. I'd much rather have a world full of heartless bastards than one full of suicidal people.
D. Emotions are real, I believe they are a system for controlling our behavior, a vital force for assigning value to an essentially valueless universe, but Humans have developed an intellect and language, which allow us to analyze the world.
E. Why do you want to make me feel stupid? That seems rather heartless-bastardesque to me.

I'm not depressed to get drugs you retard. There are much easier ways to get high than feign illness.

I was telling you to go to a psychiatrist and get a prescripition. Good to know if you have already.

And this is not for attention. It does not count for anything if a bunch of people on the internet pretend to care. They care for the wrong reasons, they don't care because they love me and I'll be missed, they pretend to care because I'm a life floating out in the nothingness of cyberspace that is threatening to kill herself. No one cares about me or my life here, they just care that they might look like a better person in others eyes if they saved someone from taking the plunge.
I went to the forums because it's completely confidential. I don't have my E-mail, AIM, MSN, Yahoo IM or any other way to contact me in this forum site, so people can't really care. It was my decision to not allow people to care for the right reasons, and assholes like you blow it out of proportion because you live in your own mud puddles.

I was referring to the attention of your peers. Those you live with. Not internet people. Although you seem quite mellow with the "aw" input. Now be a human and just move on.

Yeah I know it is, but not everyone is doing it because they want to look good. I definitely am not. As I said, the reason I offered my support was because I realise what you're going through, unlike people who have not had suicidal thoughts.

I've had them. I was miserable at a point in my life, and I've been feeling miserable lately. But I just figured that killing myself wouldn't solve anything and would be a really stupid and selfish act.

I've had them. I was miserable at a point in my life, and I've been feeling miserable lately. But I just figured that killing myself wouldn't solve anything and would be a really stupid and selfish act.
Yeah, I managed to reason through mine and take control over my emotions. I still get depressed a lot, but not to severe degrees. I will rather invest the energy in bettering myself at this point than contemplating suicide.

Sorry if I have affended you, but it's still a hard concept to wrap my brain around.
You don't have to care about me, I'm just some random person on the internet. Why would you care?

This is actually a way that some people choose to deal with past problems. Personally, I never had much support from anybody growing up, and learned to be very self reliant in that regard. However, I realized that this is not a good thing and made a decision that if I could do anything about it other people would not have to go through things alone. That's my reason for caring anyway.

"I am a sinner, for in my right hand I offer death and in my left I offer life. What is the problem you ask? Well, I am right handed. I am a sinner for I am selfish. I want for nothing but my own happiness and myself with little regard for others. I am a sinner for I share the same bloodlust as many, for I deny my very existence by denying my most basic instincts.
At heart I am nothing."

The true thoughts of a suicidal person, no? Found this on a xanga, don't know who it is though.

Thought you might enjoy that little chunk.

"I am a sinner, for in my right hand I offer death and in my left I offer life. What is the problem you ask? Well, I am right handed. I am a sinner for I am selfish. I want for nothing but my own happiness and myself with little regard for others. I am a sinner for I share the same bloodlust as many, for I deny my very existence by denying my most basic instincts.
At heart I am nothing."

The true thoughts of a suicidal person, no? Found this on a xanga, don't know who it is though.

Thought you might enjoy that little chunk.

Well, I know I enjoyed it, though parts of it seemed to be based on a flawed view of the world. You do not deny your existance/instincts by being selfish, rather you deny them by being selfless.

Well, I know I enjoyed it, though parts of it seemed to be based on a flawed view of the world. You do not deny your existance/instincts by being selfish, rather you deny them by being selfless.
I think they ment that because they were selfish they had to make up for it by denying their instints. I'm not entirely sure, but his other entries elude to that.

I think they ment that because they were selfish they had to make up for it by denying their instints. I'm not entirely sure, but his other entries elude to that.

So the issue is that the awareness of being selfish has caused them to deliberately deny their instincts so they wouldn't feel they were behaving selfishly? Personally, I think that if more people felt that way the world would be a far better place, but that's just me.

So the issue is that the awareness of being selfish has caused them to deliberately deny their instincts so they wouldn't feel they were behaving selfishly? Personally, I think that if more people felt that way the world would be a far better place, but that's just me.
It'd be pretty damn boring though.

So if given the choice of a selfless, peaceful, boring society and a selfish, conflicted, exciting society you would choose the more exciting?

I can't say I'd choose otherwise.

Our society so consciensciously enforces 'peace' and 'stability' but that is not what we want. Any movie, any game, any conversation is about conflict and struggle, hell we pay to see and dream it.

"Man is the cruelest animal. At tragedies, bullfights, and crucifixions he has so far felt best on earth; and when he invented hell for himself, behold, that was his very heaven."

Perhaps there are a few honest humans left in the world.

So if given the choice of a selfless, peaceful, boring society and a selfish, conflicted, exciting society you would choose the more exciting?

I can't say I'd choose otherwise.

Our society so consciensciously enforces 'peace' and 'stability' but that is not what we want. Any movie, any game, any conversation is about conflict and struggle, hell we pay to see and dream it.

"Man is the cruelest animal. At tragedies, bullfights, and crucifixions he has so far felt best on earth; and when he invented hell for himself, behold, that was his very heaven."

Perhaps there are a few honest humans left in the world.

Being tired of strife myself, I would choose tranquility. I understand your point though, most people would not.

As far as suicide is concerned, I gotta go with Yoda:

"Do, or do not. There is no 'try'."

Somebody loves you. Don't ask us why.

Being tired of strife myself, I would choose tranquility. I understand your point though, most people would not.

I suppose it depends on your environment, coming from a middle-class suburban, conservative community things tend to get boring, and I guess it would be vice-versa elsewhere.

Perhaps we were never meant to be happy with what we have.

Geeze ... I can tolerate being a loser ... I wouldn't want to go through life as a failure.

Killing yourself is overrated anyway. Nobody gives a shit 2 minutes after you're dead. However, if you do it, webcast it and make it loud and messy. That would be awesome. Give me the copyright in your will.
Your an asshole Keruvalia !

Dont kill yourself its not worth it. Just get a cheap whore and some tequilla all your troubles will go away. Well except mabey having STDS.

My point being. DONT KILL YOURSELF ITS THE STUPIDEST THING YOU CAN DO!

Happiness is strange. What makes one person happy could make the next person sad.
Happiness is relative, so you can't possibly make everyone happy.

If everyone was selfless and kind and caring, then we'd live in peace right? I guess, but we wouldn't really be living anymore. You need a purpose in life, and most of those purposes is to end conflicts or start them, without a sense of chaos somewhere in someone, we would just be wasting air as a lifeless shell.

Happiness is strange. What makes one person happy could make the next person sad.
Happiness is relative, so you can't possibly make everyone happy.

If everyone was selfless and kind and caring, then we'd live in peace right? I guess, but we wouldn't really be living anymore. You need a purpose in life, and most of those purposes is to end conflicts or start them, without a sense of chaos somewhere in someone, we would just be wasting air as a lifeless shell.

Indeed, many people are already dead, they just aren't aware of it yet.

It is the purpose that drives us, not the ends themselves. We are driven to acquire a dream: peace, money, power etc. and once we accomplish it we must dream again, find something new to want, to strive for, make a new purpose. It is that purpose we create, that will to accomplish, that will to power that drives us. Without disappointment, suffering, without unhappiness how could we possibly live? What would life be like if we always had what we wanted, if we never wanted anything? We'd be dead.

So what does that leave us with? Life is eternally wanting, struggling, eternally unhappy. We can either take the road of pessimists and denounce all of life as disgusting, worthless, and deceitful, or we can attempt to find something beautiful in it. A new purpose perhaps?

Indeed, many people are already dead, they just aren't aware of it yet.

It is the purpose that drives us, not the ends themselves. We are driven to acquire a dream: peace, money, power etc. and once we accomplish it we must dream again, find something new to want, to strive for, make a new purpose. It is that purpose we create, that will to accomplish, that will to power that drives us. Without disappointment, suffering, without unhappiness how could we possibly live? What would life be like if we always had what we wanted, if we never wanted anything? We'd be dead.

So what does that leave us with? Life is eternally wanting, struggling, eternally unhappy. We can either take the road of pessimists and denounce all of life as disgusting, worthless, and deceitful, or we can attempt to find something beautiful in it. A new purpose perhaps?

I'm quite aware of it. Still looking for reasons to join the ranks of the living. I may yet find a purpose for these broken wings, until then I will give light to others and always wonder why I can only see darkness myself.

what's the point of being depressed? what a lame choice to make, considering the options.

Vegetarianistica']what's the point of being depressed? what a lame choice to make, considering the options.

Lack of energy to be anything else. That's what it is for me most of the time, anyway.

This thread is still rollin´ ?
Can´t be bothered to read it all so could somebody who has tell me if anyone has killed him/herself yet?

So what does that leave us with? Life is eternally wanting, struggling, eternally unhappy. We can either take the road of pessimists and denounce all of life as disgusting, worthless, and deceitful, or we can attempt to find something beautiful in it. A new purpose perhaps?

Life is eternally wanting and eternally struggling. But not unhappy. Working towards a goal that seems within you grasp, celebrating every step on the road towards it, glorying in victory after victory in the never-ending campain of life...that is true happiness, in my opinion.

Life is eternally wanting and eternally struggling. But not unhappy. Working towards a goal that seems within you grasp, celebrating every step on the road towards it, glorying in victory after victory in the never-ending campain of life...that is true happiness, in my opinion.

Having a goal that is worth the effort and within reach can be a complete impossibility. And the road is only worth taking if the reward is more than the effort invested to obtain it. In most cases, it isn't.

I'm quite aware of it. Still looking for reasons to join the ranks of the living. I may yet find a purpose for these broken wings, until then I will give light to others and always wonder why I can only see darkness myself.

There's nothing wrong with living in darkness. Living completely in the light is just as bad as living in complete darkness: if you keep your face to the sun you will go blind. The key, I believe, is balance.

Happiness is a term that we are forced to grasp when we believe that we are in truth "ok". But people don't realize that they aren't truley happy. Though I can't tell you what makes you happy. Only you can find your own happiness.

Fear the times when the bombs are not dropping from the sky, for then the spirit is lost. Thats from the Grapes of Wrath (it's paraphrased from Chapter 14...THE COMUNISM CHAPTER!!! *ominous noises*) when you believe that you are happy, then be happy.
Do not suddenly stop to think that it is an illusion, because illusions can seem as real as the life we lead, so it is hard to tell the difference between them, and what is better?

False hope

Or no hope?

Do we really have a right to drag people out of their worlds, where they are happy, to this harsh and cruel, unfair reality?
Well, we didn't come her for fair now did we?.

Do not suddenly stop to think that it is an illusion, because illusions can seem as real as the life we lead, so it is hard to tell the difference between them, and what is better?
Technically, Life Is An Illusion. For Example, Color Isn't Real. We See Something, And Our Eyes Send A Neural Message To Our Brain, And Our Brain Then Decides What Our Eyes See, Not What Is Really There. When We Feel Something, It's Only What Our Brain Decides It Feels Like, Not What It Really Feels Like. When We Hear Something, It's Only What Our Brain Decides It Sounds Like, Not What It Really Sounds Like. When We Taste Something, It Is What Our Brain Decides It Tastes Like, Not What It Really Tastes Like. When We Smell Something, Its What Our Brain Decides It Smells Like, Not What It Really Smells Like. So, If All 5 Sense Are All Illusions Made By Our Brains, Isn't Life In A Whole Technically An Illusion? I Suppose It Is. But, Sometimes Illusions Can Be Better Then Reality, Whatever Reality Is. So, I Hope To Improve This Little Illusion We Call Life As Much As Possible.

Life is eternally wanting and eternally struggling. But not unhappy. Working towards a goal that seems within you grasp, celebrating every step on the road towards it, glorying in victory after victory in the never-ending campain of life...that is true happiness, in my opinion.

If we are always wanting, that is we have something to strive for, we will never have all that we strive for (the ends, or victory). However I am using a rather superficial definition of happiness as 'getting what you want.' I myself do not believe having what one wants will make you happy.

Happiness is a term that we are forced to grasp when we believe that we are in truth "ok". But people don't realize that they aren't truley happy. Though I can't tell you what makes you happy. Only you can find your own happiness.

Fear the times when the bombs are not dropping from the sky, for then the spirit is lost. Thats from the Grapes of Wrath (it's paraphrased from Chapter 14...THE COMUNISM CHAPTER!!! *ominous noises*) when you believe that you are happy, then be happy.
Do not suddenly stop to think that it is an illusion, because illusions can seem as real as the life we lead, so it is hard to tell the difference between them, and what is better?

False hope

Or no hope?

Do we really have a right to drag people out of their worlds, where they are happy, to this harsh and cruel, unfair reality?
Well, we didn't come her for fair now did we?.

I've seen bits of reality, 'the Truth' and she terrifies me. Although I continue to pursue her, I think if I ever met her face to face I would cower like a little school-boy. Condemn the masses to reality, the Truth? I would never do such a thing, I'm no sadist. Besides, she is mine...

There seems to be a utilitarian undertone, that striving for the happiness of all, or the majority is inherently good. I hope this is brought into question.

Do we really have a right to drag people out of their worlds, where they are happy, to this harsh and cruel, unfair reality?
Well, we didn't come her for fair now did we?.

No, but nor should we be required to put up with criticism for not liking the harsh, cruel, unfair reality simply because we choose not to be blind to it.

This thread really needed a 27th page - good work everyone

This thread really needed a 27th page - good work everyone
Hey, this thread has lots of valuable information for a psychology or philosophy major doing research ;-)

Geez, you guys haven't started writing bad poetry yet? Maegi got close with those, "broken wings" and Bjorna-something with that cowering in the face of Truth stuff, meh. If you want to be happy you can find a reason if you look long enough sometimes, as opposed to "Reality sucks, let's mope about it". Maybe give "Reality sucks, but I can find some good things, or maybe try to make it better" a try? Please? I don't want to read the poetry. I don't like iced tea, but not liking it is hardly a focus of my life.

Geez, you guys haven't started writing bad poetry yet? Maegi got close with those, "broken wings" and Bjorna-something with that cowering in the face of Truth stuff, meh. If you want to be happy you can find a reason if you look long enough sometimes, as opposed to "Reality sucks, let's mope about it". Maybe give "Reality sucks, but I can find some good things, or maybe try to make it better" a try? Please? I don't want to read the poetry. I don't like iced tea, but not liking it is hardly a focus of my life.

So many cases in point, again as first observed a stifling of creativity apparent in the condescending tone in regards to arts and expression, this case poetry. Yet another example of nihilistic tendencies of the culture.

Second, yet another misunderstanding of happiness, as if one could cause oneself to be happy. One cannot be the cause of oneself as this negates the basic principle of cause and effect. There is a sense of joy in complaining about the situation, you've just proved it. Why would you be complaining about having to read 'bad poetry' if you didn't have to in the first place? Suffering in and of itself is not the cause of unhappiness, hell people will go out of their way to suffer (take fasting for example). The cause of the greatest unhappiness comes when you are suffering and are unable to determine what the cause of the suffering is. When given a cause people will willing suffer, die even (in the name of God, country, to reach heaven or hell)

And if you knew who I was paraphrasing you would not use such a condescending tone. Perhaps 'bad poetry' is the best form of philosophy?

So many cases in point, again as first observed a stifling of creativity apparent in the condescending tone in regards to arts and expression, this case poetry. Yet another example of nihilistic tendencies of the culture.

Second, yet another misunderstanding of happiness, as if one could cause oneself to be happy. One cannot be the cause of oneself as this negates the basic principle of cause and effect. There is a sense of joy in complaining about the situation, you've just proved it. Why would you be complaining about having to read 'bad poetry' if you didn't have to in the first place? Suffering in and of itself is not the cause of unhappiness, hell people will go out of their way to suffer (take fasting for example). The cause of the greatest unhappiness comes when you are suffering and are unable to determine what the cause of the suffering is. When given a cause people will willing suffer, die even (in the name of God, country, to reach heaven or hell)

And if you knew who I was paraphrasing you would not use such a condescending tone. Perhaps 'bad poetry' is the best form of philosophy?

Eh, don't mind poetry, it can be quite pleasing and thought provoking when done well...I just expect some bad stuff from you people...

Eh, Ever think it's just you? For someone so mopey you seem to know a lot about how happiness works, eh? I'm happy because I can't think of a good reason to be sad. Sure there's depressing things out there, but being sad won't be beneficial to me, there's better things I could do like...Be happy, maybe do something about it. I've read bad peotry before, it seems probable, and I'd like to avoid it...So what's with you? Unhappy because the world sucks? Unhappy because you don't have a cause for your "suffering"? Keep it specific...

Meh, I don't know...Although I'd imagine that good poetry is one of the best forms of philosophy.


P.S. I suppose the "sense of joy in complaining about the situation" could be raising my post count, eh? :p

Eh, don't mind poetry, it can be quite pleasing and thought provoking when done well...I just expect some bad stuff from you people...

Eh, Ever think it's just you? For someone so mopey you seem to know a lot about how happiness works, eh? I'm happy because I can't think of a good reason to be sad. Sure there's depressing things out there, but being sad won't be beneficial to me, there's better things I could do like...Be happy, maybe do something about it. I've read bad peotry before, it seems probable, and I'd like to avoid it...So what's with you? Unhappy because the world sucks? Unhappy because you don't have a cause for your "suffering"? Keep it specific...

Meh, I don't know...Although I'd imagine that good poetry is one of the best forms of philosophy.

P.S. I suppose the "sense of joy in complaining about the situation" could be raising my post count, eh? :p

Are you quite finished? You've failed to bring anything to into the discussion just another re-iteration of previously stated arguments. And have you even read my posts? One at the top of the page? Happiness? It is little wonder philosphers keep their thoughts to themselves...

Specific? I just put a blatant example, how much more specific do I need to be? No, I think you need to expand your vocabulary beyond, 'good' 'bad' and 'I can't think.' This thread is not about me, but I will make this a dialogue for the sake of Wisdom.

You want post count go make your own thread, call it "God Damnit I Hate it when People are Sad and Complain!" See what response you get, otherwise stay on topic instead of reverting this into another plebian word-throwing match. If you want that there are plenty of people in this forum on your level to do so with. This is a philisophical inquiry, at least that's how I see it. You've done nothing but post a criticism without any insight or inquiry to back up your opinions.

Wow, No One Has Flamed Me Because Of My Post A Page Ago. Amazing.

Are you quite finished? You've failed to bring anything to into the discussion just another re-iteration of previously stated arguments. And have you even read my posts? One at the top of the page? Happiness? It is little wonder philosphers keep their thoughts to themselves...

Specific? I just put a blatant example, how much more specific do I need to be? No, I think you need to expand your vocabulary beyond, 'good' 'bad' and 'I can't think.' This thread is not about me, but I will make this a dialogue for the sake of Wisdom.

You want post count go make your own thread, call it "God Damnit I Hate it when People are Sad and Complain!" See what response you get, otherwise stay on topic instead of reverting this into another plebian word-throwing match. If you want that there are plenty of people in this forum on your level to do so with. This is a philisophical inquiry, at least that's how I see it. You've done nothing but post a criticism without any insight or inquiry to back up your opinions.

Geez, high and mighty for being so depressed, eh? I assume that by "just another re-iteration of previously stated arguments" these statments have been answered somewhere? I've heard something to the extent of "I don't like life because reality's a bitch" from you, I don't think that's a good reason, and I'm not entirely sure what to call what I get in response...Rhetoric? I'm not sure of the definition of that word, so I'll avoid definitively applying it....*shrug* Have I said something that applied to your post at the top of the page?

The post count thing was more of a joke really...but eesh...Technically being on topic would be adressing SaN about killing herself, but on-topicness on the 27th page in NSGeneral? So....about the whole, lack of inquiry or insight thing....I've asked questions....told you what I think, of you people, and the satments you made, which involve adressing the nature of reality and some junk like that...I'm not sure on the exact definitions of the words....but I'd imagine you could say something to it, eh?

Wow, No One Has Flamed Me Because Of My Post A Page Ago. Amazing.

Eh, I didn't feel like it really.....too lazy to try to tie down bjornova (or summat like that) AND adress my distaste with your statment...

Eh, I didn't feel like it really.....too lazy to try to tie down bjornova (or summat like that) AND adress my distaste with your statment...
What's So Distasteful About My Statement?

Wow, No One Has Flamed Me Because Of My Post A Page Ago. Amazing.

lol, I didn't know what to say besides from a scientific POV that is correct, although I think a change of wording might be need. I brain doesn't 'decided' persay what the neurological signals being sent to it mean, 'decide' seems to imply a choice. I would say 'calculates' what the incoming transmissions mean, but that's just me. I did in a way respond before, you brought up a valid point that we only interpret a reflection of reality, not what is real (if such a thing exists) Did you know the human eye cannot see certain low wavelength forms of violet, but instead of turning up blank our minds can 'color in' the blank spots for us?

But let us dwell further beyond this and see what conclusions we can come up with. If we cannot know reality how can we come to Truth, or is this entirelly created, imagined by us? If then what?

But let us dwell further beyond this and see what conclusions we can come up with. If we cannot know reality how can we come to Truth, or is this entirelly created, imagined by us? If then what?

I advise you to read some Nietzsche, he touches upon this in The Gay Science and Will to Power. I would argue that objective, absolute truth is unobtainable. We receive sensory information which is distorted by the limitations of our senses and then brain further distorts and alters it so it can fit a form that we are able to understand and potentially act upon. Obviously we don't pick up on this since most people have brains and senses that work the same way in this regard, thus creating consenual reality; but there is no reason to believe that our consenual reality correctly reflects "absolute" reality any farther than our knowledge of what we call "truth" enables us to predict and control the objects of our knowledge and perception. And even in these areas our explainations for phenomenon does not neccessarily reflect their reality; consider for example how many hundreds of thousands of years we worked with fire before properly understanding it (if we even properly understand it now). My opinion as to what should be done about this: toss aside the search for "truth" as a pseudo-moral quest for the absolute and instead pragmatize the search into a striving for the power to control our enviornment. This seems, to some extent, to be what is already being done; so I think we are on the right track.

I advise you to read some Nietzsche, he touches upon this in The Gay Science and Will to Power. I would argue that objective, absolute truth is unobtainable. We receive sensory information which is distorted by the limitations of our senses and then brain further distorts and alters it so it can fit a form that we are able to understand and potentially act upon. Obviously we don't pick up on this since most people have brains and senses that work the same way in this regard, thus creating consenual reality; but there is no reason to believe that our consenual reality correctly reflects "absolute" reality any farther than our knowledge of what we call "truth" enables us to predict and control the objects of our knowledge and perception. And even in these areas our explainations for phenomenon does not neccessarily reflect their reality; consider for example how many hundreds of thousands of years we worked with fire before properly understanding it (if we even properly understand it now). My opinion as to what should be done about this: toss aside the search for "truth" as a pseudo-moral quest for the absolute and instead pragmatize the search into a striving for the power to control our enviornment. This seems, to some extent, to be what is already being done; so I think we are on the right track.

Well, I read Genealogy of Morals, Beyond Good and Evil, and The Will to Power, but not The Gay Science yet. I like this idea (highlighted) but would like to expand. Pragmatize as in finding a practical solution to our control the environment, but to what ends (or am I assumign to much by talking about ends from a pragmatists' POV?)? Or is controling our environment inherently good? What problems may arise from controlling our environment, and how should they be resovled as well? Finding a pragmatic solution to life as in the survival of the most individuals, or the best individuals? What do we bring into the calculation and how do we calculate it? Or will it always be a 'trial and error?'

What's So Distasteful About My Statement?

Weeeell.....um....I forgot and can't be bothered to go back and look....Maybe later, still wondering if Bjornoya (think I got it right) can be held to a point.....he's like that greased up deaf guy....

Well, I read Genealogy of Morals, Beyond Good and Evil, and The Will to Power, but not The Gay Science yet. I like this idea (highlighted) but would like to expand. Pragmatize as in finding a practical solution to our control the environment, but to what ends? Or is controling our environment inherently good? What problems may arise from controlling our environment, and how should they be resovled as well? Finding a pragmatic solution to life as in the survival of the most individuals, or the best individuals? What do we bring into the calculation and how do we calculate it? Or will it always be a 'trial and error?'

That brings up a very different topic. All "good" and "evil" are inherently a matter of perspective so controlling the enviornment is not inherently good; and the value of anything that stems from controlling the enviornment (by which I meant the external world, but upon further consideration should not be limited to that) is also a matter of perspective. So we inevitably we get into the area of personal opinions on the matter as to what controlling the enviornment should entail or to what extent we should do so (it could be argued, by a Luddite for example, that there is no reason to continue to advancing our ability to control our enviorment). Also, perhaps the power to control the observable world (seems to be the best term) should be seperated from the act of using the power; or to give a concrete example the power to create an anti-matter bomb is seperate from actual act of doing so (or perhaps just from using it). And obviously all matters of problems can arise (and have already arisen) from controlling the observable world; nothing really can be done about this except exercising discretion. I'll expand upon this later.

That brings up a very different topic. All "good" and "evil" are inherently a matter of perspective so controlling the enviornment is not inherently good; and the value of anything that stems from controlling the enviornment (by which I meant the external world, but upon further consideration should not be limited to that) is also a matter of perspective. So we inevitably we get into the area of personal opinions on the matter as to what controlling the enviornment should entail or to what extent we should do so (it could be argued, by a Luddite for example, that there is no reason to continue to advancing our ability to control our enviorment). Also, perhaps the power to control the observable world (seems to be the best term) should be seperated from the act of using the power; or to give a concrete example the power to create an anti-matter bomb is seperate from actual act of doing so (or perhaps just from using it). And obviously all matters of problems can arise (and have already arisen) from controlling the observable world; nothing really can be done about this except exercising discretion. I'll expand upon this later.

Oh! But you could blow up a huuuuuuge meteor with an antimatter bomb! Imagine how COOL that would look! Seriously, like, the ultimate firework! BOOM! Hehehe....

Oh! But you could blow up a huuuuuuge meteor with an antimatter bomb! Imagine how COOL that would look! Seriously, like, the ultimate firework! BOOM! Hehehe....
That's exactly the reason why we should gather these capabilities; so that if the need arises we can use them.

Attention? :rolleyes: If a person seriously considers taking their lives, that is the LAST thing on their minds.

most people who 'try' to kill themselfs, don't actually 'try'.

That brings up a very different topic. All "good" and "evil" are inherently a matter of perspective so controlling the enviornment is not inherently good; and the value of anything that stems from controlling the enviornment (by which I meant the external world, but upon further consideration should not be limited to that) is also a matter of perspective. So we inevitably we get into the area of personal opinions on the matter as to what controlling the enviornment should entail or to what extent we should do so (it could be argued, by a Luddite for example, that there is no reason to continue to advancing our ability to control our enviorment). Also, perhaps the power to control the observable world (seems to be the best term) should be seperated from the act of using the power; or to give a concrete example the power to create an anti-matter bomb is seperate from actual act of doing so (or perhaps just from using it). And obviously all matters of problems can arise (and have already arisen) from controlling the observable world; nothing really can be done about this except exercising discretion. I'll expand upon this later.

As much as I am honestly intrigued by these ideas I'm not sure how they would help, maybe better to discuss a different time or a different place. It appears we are acting as scientists who believe they could help a specimen by dissecting it. There are already so many mistakes and, should I say false connotations within the analogy, I do not want to offend anyone with it. My goal in participating in this thread is to try and help another; I'm not sure what the drive for it is nor do I think it matters. Even with the wording I fear I am coming off as unneccessarily condescending and demeaning. I am concerned as to how the ideas being presented are interpretted, which at this point I am unsure of. For now I will save my thoughts 'til a better time.

As much as I am honestly intrigued by these ideas I'm not sure how they would help, maybe better to discuss a different time or a different place. It appears we are acting as scientists who believe they could help a specimen by dissecting it. There is already so many mistakes and, should I say false connotations within the analogy, I do not want to offend anyone with it. My goal in participating in this thread is to try and help another; I'm not sure what the drive for it is nor do I think it matters. Even with the wording I fear I am coming off as unneccessarily condescending and demeaning. I am concerned as to how the ideas being presented are interpretted, which at this point I am unsure of. For now I will save my thoughts 'til a better time.


". Even with the wording I fear I am coming off as unneccessarily condescending and demeaning. "

I'll go along with that hypothesis. Common courtesy is also nice.

". Even with the wording I fear I am coming off as unneccessarily condescending and demeaning. "

I'll go along with that hypothesis. Common courtesy is also nice.

Not telling people to 'STFU, stop thinking and be happy loser' is also nice...

As much as I am honestly intrigued by these ideas I'm not sure how they would help, maybe better to discuss a different time or a different place. It appears we are acting as scientists who believe they could help a specimen by dissecting it. There is already so many mistakes and, should I say false connotations within the analogy, I do not want to offend anyone with it. My goal in participating in this thread is to try and help another; I'm not sure what the drive for it is nor do I think it matters. Even with the wording I fear I am coming off as unneccessarily condescending and demeaning. I am concerned as to how the ideas being presented are interpretted, which at this point I am unsure of. For now I will save my thoughts 'til a better time.

Yes, my posts have absolutely nothing to do with the original topic of the thread; but that generally isn't an issue. Though I understand why that might be in this case when the topic of the thread is what it is.

Not telling people to 'STFU, stop thinking and be happy loser' is also nice...

well...I'd at least try to avoid swearing...although I might have...not sure....I never told you to be quiet or stop thinking though, I'm sure many of my questions were non-rhetorical, not sure where the answers were...and I figure be happy is always nice advice, if it didn't bother me you're making yourself miserable for what I can so far see as no good reason...eh...

i think that if u find that u must. no one can stop u.

Yes, my posts have absolutely nothing to do with the original topic of the thread; but that generally isn't an issue. Though I understand why that might be in this case when the topic of the thread is what it is.

How often do posts have anything to do with the original topic on the 28th page?

Wow, No One Has Flamed Me Because Of My Post A Page Ago. Amazing.

Why would you get flamed for it? The only negative I could find about it was the irritating capitalization of every word.

Well, my parents found out about the suicide thing. And my world just went to hell in a hamsterball. No one is really trying to help me, so far they've blamed the world's problems on me.

Because that makes a suicidal person all better.

Well, my parents found out about the suicide thing. And my world just went to hell in a hamsterball. No one is really trying to help me, so far they've blamed the world's problems on me.

Because that makes a suicidal person all better.

See if you can get them blamed for it then....or maybe steal a credit card and see what you can do to help yourself, although, weeks later, I'm not too worried.

No one is really trying to help me

To be honest, from what I've read here, you don't seem to be very accepting of help. Try sitting down with your parents and having a "talk"?

If your going to kill yourself, take some people with you.

Hear, hear!

Well, my parents found out about the suicide thing. And my world just went to hell in a hamsterball. No one is really trying to help me, so far they've blamed the world's problems on me.

Because that makes a suicidal person all better.

I do not blaim you for America's 25 trillion dollar debt ;)

I do not blaim you for America's 25 trillion dollar debt ;)
But my mom does!

To be honest, from what I've read here, you don't seem to be very accepting of help. Try sitting down with your parents and having a "talk"?
Hey, incase you haven't read, not a lot of people are trying to help me here. Quite a few are either discussing something else or telling me to go die.

And believe me, I've tried talking.

But my mom does!

LOL, parents are not the brightest; loving but failing to express it correctly perhaps?

Ok, what do you want to talk about? Floor is all yours.

LOL, parents are not the brightest; loving but failing to express it correctly perhaps?

Ok, what do you want to talk about? Floor is all yours.
Hm...I don't really want to talk about this anymore.

I want to be a manga artist, and I'm chock full of stories. I just can't seem to start them.

And a few of them ended up being really...hard to understand.

This is the most absurdly lengthy thread I've seen in a while.

This is the most absurdly lengthy thread I've seen in a while.

Yeah really.

I thought everything was settled at page 12 at the most.

Hm...I don't really want to talk about this anymore.

I want to be a manga artist, and I'm chock full of stories. I just can't seem to start them.

And a few of them ended up being really...hard to understand.

Most mangas are as such.

try reading FLCL

Last night I tried to kill myself, but as you can see I failed.
I told one of my friends and he got angry, and I can understand why...it's just...I can't stop feeling like I deserve to die.
Especially since he's not the determining factor.
*sigh*
He then told me a story about how someone he knew killed themselves and I began to cry in public.
What am I going to do with me?


I've been there -- more than once. Get some help now. Please. You don't deserve to die. No one does.

try reading FLCL

Exactly, I've been through that quite a few times...I think I'm starting to understand it.

Exactly, I've been through that quite a few times...I think I'm starting to understand it.
What the hell does Fooly Cooly mean anyway? The guys father was trying to explain it as some kama sutra term in the first episode I think...

Silence And Nothing, it's been a while since we've seen you! Can you say something so we can know whether you're alive or not?

Isn't anyone besides me fearing for Silence And Nothing's life? I mean, she hasn't been on so long, it's possible she went through with it and succeceded.

Sounds like you need hugs.

*hug*

Isn't anyone besides me fearing for Silence And Nothing's life? I mean, she hasn't been on so long, it's possible she went through with it and succeceded.

How would we find out?

We simply have to hope she didn't if she doesn't respond.

She's in a better place probably.
Or worse.

She's in a better place probably.
Or worse.
I say she's in a better place.

And a few of them ended up being really...hard to understand.
My stories always end up that way, it's no big deal. ;)

Isn't anyone besides me fearing for Silence And Nothing's life? I mean, she hasn't been on so long, it's possible she went through with it and succeceded.
Sorry, kid, my level of worry about the lives of random internet people is approximately as high as that about whether the cockroaches under my refrigerator will get food poisoning from my cooking [/fiddles].

Besides, it's far more likely that she's just offline for a few days. It happens to the best of us.

Isn't anyone besides me fearing for Silence And Nothing's life? I mean, she hasn't been on so long, it's possible she went through with it and succeceded.According to her nation's page (http://www.nationstates.net/-1/page=display_nation/nation=silence_and_nothing), she logged in 11 hours ago. She's probably just taking a break from the forums, therefore :)

According to her nation's page (http://www.nationstates.net/-1/page=display_nation/nation=silence_and_nothing), she logged in 11 hours ago. She's probably just taking a break from the forums, therefore :)
Phew. I was seriously thinking she did it.
No one has pounded me for reviving this monster of a thread! Amazing.

I can't believe you guys worried about me^^'

Yeah, I'm still alive, and having anti-depressants shoved down my throat everyday.
Living sure is great. *sarcasm!*

three answers:
1: ATTENTION WHORE
(if youre not, apologies)
2:Think of what you would miss, music, tv, sex, fingernail growth, maybe not sex
3: DIE LIKE A MAN,
Scoop your eyes out and replace them with cadbury creme eggs (NO PCP allowes), then eat a bath full of beans untl you cant eat any more, then eat some more. That will kill you like a man and you will live on in memory forever.

I can't believe you guys worried about me^^'

Yeah, I'm still alive, and having anti-depressants shoved down my throat everyday.
Living sure is great. *sarcasm!*



Oh quit being emo :p.


Honestly. Why kill yourself? I didn't bother to go through and read the whole thing. You feel alone? You feel like no one likes you? Well I have been there(just last night in fact) Feeling all alone. But then I realized, i don't need people to make me feel better. Just myself. Or something.

Wow, I update and 2 seconds later people are suddenly adding new replies! I feel so popular!
I'd like to thank the academey...

Last night I tried to kill myself, but as you can see I failed.
I told one of my friends and he got angry, and I can understand why...it's just...I can't stop feeling like I deserve to die.
Especially since he's not the determining factor.
*sigh*
He then told me a story about how someone he knew killed themselves and I began to cry in public.
What am I going to do with me?

Well, for a start, I'd begin by not trolling to tug on strangers' heart strings with an obvious false story about how you tried to kill yourself.

Well, for a start, I'd begin by not trolling to tug on strangers' heart strings with an obvious false story about how you tried to kill yourself.

ASSHOLE ALERT! Please remain indoors and lock your windows!

Please pull your head out of your ass, I can tell you've got it so far up there that you've inhaled so much shit that you can't show compassion.

ASSHOLE ALERT! Please remain indoors and lock your windows!

Please pull your head out of your ass, I can tell you've got it so far up there that you've inhaled so much shit that you can't show compassion.

Just a friendly word of advice..ignore dickwads. its alot easier to get through the forum with out paying attention to them.

Just a friendly word of advice..ignore dickwads. its alot easier to get through the forum with out paying attention to them.

why can't we just burn them off the face of the planet?

why can't we just burn them off the face of the planet?

It'd smell really bad.

I once tried to kill myself. I swallowed a bottle of my prescription sleep pills, Trazodone, and a ton of vodka. Apparently, you can't overdose on it, and I awoke very confused, lost, and very hungover for many days after. I didn't tell anyone.

I'm very grateful I did not die, now. I changed a lot of things in my life after that...

Don't kill yourself, just take a look at yourself the way someone else would see you, and change what you don't like. It isn't as hard as it seems... I, more than most people, would know. You can love yourself, if you try.

I can't believe you guys worried about me^^'

Yeah, I'm still alive, and having anti-depressants shoved down my throat everyday.
Living sure is great. *sarcasm!*
of course we're worried about you. I've already lost one friend to suicide... :(

WTF!
This is old...

Ok ok...
Love a beautiful corpse!
Thank you and good night.
*bows*

ASSHOLE ALERT! Please remain indoors and lock your windows!

Please pull your head out of your ass, I can tell you've got it so far up there that you've inhaled so much shit that you can't show compassion.

I've been good friends with three clinically depressed people, two of which were suicidal. The suicidal people didn't pull any of this "Look at me, give me attention!" bullshit; they just went about what they felt they had to do with a grim sort of resolve. Luckily, neither of them died and have worked through their problems, but one thing these people didn't do is hunt for sympathy and support - suicide is a grotesque thing like that. People only are driven to it once they feel there's no hope they can find sympathy or support.

Searching for sympathy and support - whether from strangers or your closest friends - is a natural, sane and understandable thing to do. "Natural, sane and understandable" are words never used to describe suicide. Well, I could see it maybe being sane and understandable if you're a spy about to be captured or you're fighting zombies and you've decided to save the last bullet for yourself, but I think we can both agree that those are extraordinary circumstances.

Don't gravedig.