NationStates Jolt Archive

ENGLAND EXPECTS THAT EVERY MAN SHALL DO HIS DUTY - VOTE FOR US HERE: http://forums.jolt.co.uk/showthread.php?t=447132

The New British Imperialist Party - Manifesto

http://www.simonlevack.com/union%20flag.gif

Welcome to the New British Imperialist Party manifesto, old boy. It's absolutely spiffing to see you, wotwot! Throughout this manifesto I'll do my best to convince you of the benefits to nationstates that would come from the site moving into the light of Britannic civilisation, wot!

Key Points

1) The drinking of tea is mandatory. Any member of NationStates who does not drink at least one cup every 12 hours will get a jolly good talking to! 'Coffee' is banned.

2) Watching (and waving a Union Flag during) the Last Night of the Proms is compulsorary.

3) Anyone from a former part of the British Empire is to be referred to as a "damn colonial".

4) Anyone not from a former part of the British Empire or Britain is to be referred to as a "damn foreigner".

5) The manufacture of tweed jackets, bowler hats and umbrellas is to be subsidised.

6) NationStates shall invest vast sums of money into building a Royal Navy.

7) The word "Empire" must be pronounced "Emparh" with reference to the British Empire.

8) Only the Union Flag, the flag of Scotland, the flag of England or the flag of a Commonwealth Realm may be chosen for your national flag.

9) All national mottos must include "Rule Britannia" or "God Save the Queen".

10) All national currencies must be the "<something> Pound".

11) Instead of warnings, forum bans or deletions, the primary method of enforcing NS rules will be to send in a gunboat.

12) Celebrating the battles of Agincourt, Trafalgar and Waterloo is compulsorary on pain of removal of tea rations.

13) An official moratorium is to be put in place upon the phrases "Well done" and "Congratulations". Instead, the phrase "Jolly good show!" must be used.

14) It is compulsory to moan about the "bloody weather" at least once per day, or at any time when noticing the bloody weather.

15) NationStates is to apply for Commonwealth membership and recognise the Queen as head of state.

Now that that's over, you can all go out and jolly well vote for me, wot! (http://forums.jolt.co.uk/showthread.php?t=447132)

God Save the Queen!

Current Loyal Britons!

Praetonia (Party Leader)
Kriegorgrad (Party Chairman)
Hogsweat (Senior Party Official)
The Blessed Chris (Honourable Member)
Call to Power (Honourable Member)
The Island of Rose (Honourable Member)
Xeropa (Honourable Member)
E Blackadder (Honourable Member)
Ankhmet (Honourable Member)
Aust (Honourable Member)
Skinny87 (Honourable Member)
Unified Conservatives (Honourable Member)
Makaar (Honourable Member)
Jeleen (Honourable Member)
DontPissUsOff (Honourable Member)
Gramnonia (Honourable Member)
Ritlina (Honourable Member)
Artitsa (Honourable Member)
Leinstermunster (Honourable Member)
Bersabia (Honourable Member)
Wellington I (Honourable Member)

Total Membership: XXI

* Praetonia accepts no legal, moral or any other kind of responsibility for the un-PC statements made in his manifesto. Wot!

Why what an absolutely spiffing idea Lord Marshall Praeton, now, how shall we deal with those blasted bolshevik penguins, I suggest a few bayonet charges and we'll give them a jolly good thrashing! Huzzah!

Why what an absolutely spiffing idea Lord Marshall Praeton, now, how shall we deal with those blasted bolshevik penguins, I suggest a few bayonet charges and we'll give them a jolly good thrashing! Huzzah!
Oh I say! Rather! A few jolly good cavalry charges should sort the blighters out! Charge!

Pip pip and hurrah I daresay, we'll give those dastardly devils a good hiding! Old British steel and rifle shall prevail over the blasted contraptions of this new era...machine guns I believe they are called. Anyway, will be a good show, it's terribly fun moving the little men about on the big board!

This stuff gets old real quick.

Oh rather, Krieg old chap! Jolly good fun swatting them into this bin as well, wot! Anyway we'll be sure to give them a damn good thrashing! No one's overcome good old British pluck yet!

This stuff gets old real quick.

You fail, you're not worthy of the nation name QuentinTarantino, that man pwns the socks off of you.

P.S (before Hog beats me to it) "Your momma douchebag!"

Hi, I am the leader of an internation club of Imperialists, based at the .ORG. You might want to check out the club, though I am a bloody forienger, we prioritize German and British applications above all.

Hi, I am the leader of an internation club of Imperialists, based at the .ORG. You might want to check out the club, though I am a bloody forienger, we prioritize German and British applications above all.
Jolly good show, old boy! I'll make sure to give you chaps a bell. Maybe we can help each other, wot?!

You fail, you're not worthy of the nation name QuentinTarantino, that man pwns the socks off of you.

P.S (before Hog beats me to it) "Your momma douchebag!"

He's a 40 something comic book geek with a few good films under his belt, thats about it.

(Whispers to Lord Marshal Praeton) "Why I don't know sir, krauts, didn't those jerrys give us a jolly hard time in the wars? Ah well, we shall befriend them...if only to crush the devillish bolsheviks of the icey south!"

(Clears throat and talks loudly)

"Why yes, it would be a most spiffing opportunity to work with our Germanic friends, may we both move forward and spread the wonderous fruits of British...British and Germanic imperialism! Huzzah! Huzzah!

Oh yes, and can I join this fine old party, being the aged gentleman I am, I am a man of taste and hereby require a party of similar etiquette."


He's a 40 something comic book geek with a few good films under his belt, thats about it.

(Sighs)

Okay, you obviously didn't hear me the first time: YOU FAIL. Period. Discussion closed, okay? Kthxbaidrivthru.

He's a 40 something comic book geek with a few good films under his belt, thats about it.
Again, you fail, he's still better than you are.

(Whispers to Sir Kriegsoff) "I know old boy, we probably shouldnt trust them, but they're better than the damn French, w'n't you say?

(Clears throat)

"Three cheers for Sir Kriegsoff! Three cheers for the Anglo-German alliance! Hip-hip! Huzzah! Hip-hip! Huzzah! Hip-hip! Huzzah! Jolly good show, old chaps. What say we crack open a spritely old red and have a jolly good party!"

Harrah those vile Huns will get what’s coming to em after tea and crumpets

got my vote :D

EDIT: damm thunder storm:mad:

Good sir, for the honour of the mother land I beseech you to afford me entry to the noted political party.

Let us therefore brace ourselves to our duties, and so bear ourselves that, if the British Empire and its Commonwealth last for a thousand years, men will still say, "This was their finest hour." Winston Churchill, 1940

Oh, a couple of guys and me in my school set up a BIP. It's not openly imperialist, though. Won't join, have my own. :D

Harrah those vile Huns will get what’s coming to em after tea and crumpets

got my vote :D

Tally ho, lets go and give Jerry a good Britsih thrashing, and it'll all be over by christmas...

(Becoming increasingly drunk) Oh baly good show old boys! (hic) What say you chaps? God save the Queen?! (raises glass)

(hic)

(falls over)

[QUOTE=PraetoniaWelcome to the New British Imperialist Party manifesto, old boy. It's absolutely spiffing to see you, wotwot! Throughout this manifesto I'll do my best to convince you of the benefits to nationstates that would come from the site moving into the light of Britannic civilisation, wot!

[/QUOTE]

How about former colonials that (looking at it from a historical view) most likely would have been a Loyalist?

"Why thank you, thank you Sir Praeton, I must offer you all tea and crumpets, as well as complimentary canes and top hats - we are gentlemen after all, except for that Quentin fellow, the stench of dirty communism follows that man!

Should any of you be interested in joining our proud, fledgling little party, feel free to chaps!"

How about former colonials that (looking at it from a historical view) most likely would have been a Loyalist?

"Why kind sir, you could toil alongside the sons and daughters of Britannia as we work towards a greater, better future under glorious imperial rule!"

How about former colonials that (looking at it from a historical view) most likely would have been a Loyalist?
Well baly good luck to them I say! (hic) Welcome aboard if 'tis yer wish!

"Why thank you, thank you Sir Praeton, I must offer you all tea and crumpets, as well as complimentary canes and top hats - we are gentlemen after all, except for that Quentin fellow, the stench of dirty communism follows that man!

Should any of you be interested in joining our proud, fledgling little party, feel free to chaps!"

Incidentally, how would we be progressing in the valiant struggle against the convicts in the cricket?

"First off, we must get a smashing cricket team - all men of noble blood and good intentions play cricket, then, after we've played croquet and cricket, had a smashing time at the theatre, watching one of shakespeare's wonderful - not competely dull and boring - plays, we shall set off to conquer the world and to unite it under the union jack! Huzzah for Britannia!"

4) Anyone not from a former part of the British Empire or Britain is to be referred to as a "damn foreigner".What about Germans? Would we be lumped with the French or do we get our own name like "Hun" or "Kraut"? :p

What about Germans? Would we be lumped with the French or do we get our own name like "Hun" or "Kraut"? :p

No, you would be Fritz, Jerry or Harry Hun :)

What about Germans? Would we be lumped with the French or do we get our own name like "Hun" or "Kraut"? :p
Depends, old boy, depends. Britannia has always had a natural affinity with the Germanic people and wot! I should think a decision shall have to be made sometime, wot, but the party is too new to start a debate on such things, y'see? Anyway, jolly good luck to you, wot!

4) Anyone not from a former part of the British Empire or Britain is to be referred to as a "damn foreigner".

15) NationStates is to apply for Commonwealth membership and recognise the Queen as head of state. I agree, except for 4 and 15. We must call them "Johnny Foreigner" most of the time, only "damn foreigner" or "damn foreign blighters" if we're fighting them at the moment.

The Queen is also the Empress of the colonies, remember.

Oh yes, and "bloody" is sometimes pronounced "bladdy".

Now let's watch ZULU!

"First off, we must get a smashing cricket team - all men of noble blood and good intentions play cricket, then, after we've played croquet and cricket, had a smashing time at the theatre, watching one of shakespeare's wonderful - not competely dull and boring - plays, we shall set off to conquer the world and to unite it under the union jack! Huzzah for Britannia!"

Thou Art Sarcasm? Doth spilt blood of ye etc etc.[/droning]

Do we intend to allocate earldoms within the party?

I agree, except for 4 and 15. We must call them "Johnny Foreigner" most of the time, only "damn foreigner" or "damn foreign blighters" if we're fighting them at the moment.

The Queen is also the Empress of the colonies, remember.

Oh yes, and "bloody" is sometimes pronounced "bladdy".

Now let's watch ZULU!
Well, wot, for although Johnny foreigner is an alternative we have to keep things simple for the time being old chap. So many alternatives y'see! And dont you know the Empire is dead! Commonwealth, man, commonwealth!

(whispers to Liskeinland) Wait until they get us in power and then we'll show the blighters how dead the British Empire is, wot!

(clears throat)

Sorry about that, old boy. Anyway, do you want to join the party, wot?!

Thou Art Sarcasm? Doth spilt blood of ye etc etc.[/droning]

Excuse me, I happen to think that Shakespeare is, in all sincerity, bloody brilliant, especially Macbeth, for reasons I have neither the time nor inclination to outlay.

Excuse me, I happen to think that Shakespeare is, in all sincerity, bloody brilliant, especially Macbeth, for reasons I have neither the time nor inclination to outlay.

oh I say I was always more attracted to those films on the jolly brilliant monarchy!

oh I say I was always more attracted to those films on the jolly brilliant monarchy!

They are, I would have you know, bloody spiffing, not brilliant :p

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v387/Praetonia/NBIP.png

I want to join the Party as a Commonwealth!

I refuse to change to a Pound or to change my motto or flag. But I will do everything else! If it helps, Monty Python makes better comedy then those bloody colonials...

I dont quite understand good sir, but I shall add you to the list anyway.

Roight then, bloody good show! I say I propose the following!

The Royal Navy is to be renamed Her Royal Majesty Victoria I'sI (Conqueror of India, Duchess of Northumberland, Matriarch of the Church of England, Wife of His Royal Majesty Prince Albert XXI, Head of the Commonwealth, Sovereign of the British Empire, and Mrs. Britannia 2005) Royal Armada.

Whoevah agrees say aye!

can I join this bloody spiffing party rule Britannia!

EDIT: by golly that was quick

Tally ho chaps! After partaking of my supper of tea and crumpets I decided to view the new fangled internet gadgetmotron doodah and was delighted to stumble upon your jolly old imperialist knees-up and wondered if one might be so bold as to request permission to partake in the old jollity what?

As a token of note towards my inclusion, might I add that an ancestor of mine, great etc. several times grandfather thomas was privileged to bear the standard of all England and bally St. George at the Battle of Agincourt what? Once more unto the breach dear friends and all that. Jolly good show I say.

Well, pip pip. We'll be sipping Earl Grey with Monty in Alex before it's all over I should say.

can I join this bloody spiffing party rule Britannia!

EDIT: by golly that was quick

"Of course good fellow!

And my old chum Rose, of course you can join! Have a spiffing time as a member of the best party around!"

Tally ho chaps! After partaking of my supper of tea and crumpets I decided to view the new fangled internet gadgetmotron doodah and was delighted to stumble upon your jolly old imperialist knees-up and wondered if one might be so bold as to request permission to partake in the old jollity what?

As a token of note towards my inclusion, might I add that an ancestor of mine, great etc. several times grandfather thomas was privileged to bear the standard of all England and bally St. George at the Battle of Agincourt what? Once more unto the breach dear friends and all that. Jolly good show I say.

Well, pip pip. We'll be sipping Earl Grey with Monty in Alex before it's all over I should say.
Of course, Old chap! Welcome to the NBIP. May we have some grand Imperialist adventures, wot!

15) NationStates is to apply for Commonwealth membership and recognise the Queen as head of state.

jolly good show! spiffingly hilarious what!! ohohohohohoho wotwot :D

i don't particularly want to join (other than for comedy value) but i do just want to say freakin' awesome idea :p

Awfully kind of you old boy. If you ever do feel like joining then just pop down here and give us a bell.

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v387/Praetonia/britannia.png

Why what an absolutely spiffing idea Lord Marshall Praeton, now, how shall we deal with those blasted bolshevik penguins, I suggest a few bayonet charges and we'll give them a jolly good thrashing! Huzzah!

Because all of us Brits talk like that of course.

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v387/Praetonia/britannia.png

(guess what's my new flag :D )

Because all of us Brits talk like that of course.

......yes

......yes

Now that's just offensive.

Now that's just offensive.
...how was that offensive? Why are you even in this thread if all you want to do is insult it? Errr... I mean... (clears throat) Sir, you are making a scene!

Because all of us Brits talk like that of course.

I'm a Brit and I take pride in poking fun at our grand nation, get over yourself, really...this is meant to be a corny old British party, if you don't like it, you're not wanted in this thread. Get a sense of humour or get out.



"And to all the fellows interested in joining, pop down to my manor house in the countryside for a spot of tea, crumpets and scones! With jam and marmalade, I do pray it goes swimmingly well."



P.S Xeropa, that's awesome about the standard bearer, I myself have lineage back to the Black Prince, the same one who massacred French civilians...bless his cotton socks!

10) All national currencies must be the "<something> Pound".

I don't want to join your party but, I must just say that the pound currency is srtictly refered to as the sterling.

Spiffing idea, keep a check on those damn foreigners. For the Emparh!

[center]The New British Imperialist Party - Manifesto

Wot![/size]

Bloody good show. count me in old boy.

Jolly good show, old chaps. Ankhmet, dear boy, are you joining too?

Jolly good show, old chaps. Ankhmet, dear boy, are you joining too?


>.> <.< Old chaps is singular not grouped.... >.> <.< :)
Old chap, Never old ChapS

Quiet. <.< >.>

I hope you are going to make sir winston and general gordon's birthday's a national holiday

Oh, certainly! And of course Wellington and Nelsons' birthdays. Can't for get them, wotwot?!

Oh, certainly! And of course Wellington and Nelsons' birthdays. Can't for get them, wotwot?!

nor dempsy or Monty

Jolly good show, old chaps. Ankhmet, dear boy, are you joining too?

Absolutely. Too bloody good a show to miss, wot!?

with your permission me' lord may i take the liberty of writing an additional rule or two into your fine manifesto?

Of course, old chap. We'll all have to vote on it first before it comes into force though, of course.

Of course, old chap. We'll all have to vote on it first before it comes into force though, of course.

of course my dear fellow..i shall have finished it within the hour and shall post it here foir you to see, if you are disatisfied with the result i shall delete it.

Well, wot, for although Johnny foreigner is an alternative we have to keep things simple for the time being old chap. So many alternatives y'see! And dont you know the Empire is dead! Commonwealth, man, commonwealth!

(whispers to Liskeinland) Wait until they get us in power and then we'll show the blighters how dead the British Empire is, wot!

(clears throat)

Sorry about that, old boy. Anyway, do you want to join the party, wot?! Oh rather, what? (Believe it or not, I actually do talk like that sometimes. Generally when I'm happy)

I say, my dear fellows, are we to have an east india trading company?

I say, my dear fellows, are we to have an east india trading company?

i think it is quite necesery...to benefit both us and the westernised oriental gentlemen.

Jolly good sah, I must say that this party looks absoloutly spiffing eh wot, certainly you ahve the full support of us true Yorkshire men, sah. And we'll give these damn foreigners a damn good smaching, eh wot.

Jolly good sah, I must say that this party looks absoloutly spiffing eh wot, certainly you ahve the full support of us true Yorkshire men, sah. And we'll give these damn foreigners a damn good smaching, eh wot. Tally ho! We'll march off in our brand spanking red uniforms and be home for tea and medals, wot?

Tally ho! We'll march off in our brand spanking red uniforms and be home for tea and medals, wot?
indeed, sah, and good riddence to them I say. I like the idea of the red uniforms, very smart, make the blighters run for the hills, Jolly good show, wot?

Tally ho! We'll march off in our brand spanking red uniforms and be home for tea and medals, wot?


up didle up, down didle down, whoops, bop, didle de, shot down, capture, torture,escape, and back home in time for tea and medals?..sounds like fun

up didle up, down didle down, whoops, bop, didle de, shot down, capture, torture,escape, and back home in time for tea and medals?..sounds like fun
indeed sah.

i think it is quite necesery...to benefit both us and the westernised oriental gentlemen.

With valiant heart I shall, Praetonia permitting, enter the breach and assume such a mantle.

gentlemen we shall be eating bagels in boston by luncheon and in wendys diner in washington by sun-down

up didle up, down didle down, whoops, bop, didle de, shot down, capture, torture,escape, and back home in time for tea and medals?..sounds like fun

Permission to shout Bravo at an annoying loud volume sir?

With valiant heart I shall, Praetonia permitting, enter the breach and assume such a mantle.

i am just a little worried sir, about re-capturing the raj do you think the natives will mind?

Permission to shout Bravo at an annoying loud volume sir?
It's sah, sah if you want to be truely british, and permission granted, one two three, bravo!

Permission to shout Bravo at an annoying loud volume sir?

if you must

i am just a little worried sir, about re-capturing the raj do you think the natives will mind?
I wouldn't think so sah, I'm sure they be absaloutly delighted to see us marching to bring civilisation and good British values to there mud huts, eh wot?

It's sah, sah if you want to be truely british, and permission granted, one two three, bravo!

surely its only sah if your an N.C.O or R.S.M?

"parade are ready for your inspection sah!"

Carry on seargant major

if you must

BRAVO

I wouldn't think so sah, I'm sure they be absaloutly delighted to see us marching to bring civilisation and good British values to there mud huts, eh wot?

well thats what i told this blessed fellow in punah but he still tried to torch the embassy while shouting "quit india" it really is bad for moral a thing like that

surely its only sah if your an N.C.O or R.S.M?

"parade are ready for your inspection sah!"

Carry on seargant major
I thought it was all those in the lower ranks sah, not the land owning gentlemen like us.

Come on, chaps, we can't go alienating Injah already now can we? Probably best just to steal their tea and then make for the coast, wotwot!

well thats what i told this blessed fellow in punah but he still tried to torch the embassy while shouting "quit india" it really is bad for moral a thing like that
indeed, next they'll be wanting to leave the commonwealth and we can't have that, can we sah? Shoot the blighters that what I say. Or hunt 'em like we do with foxes, that'd be jolly good sport, wot?

Come on, chaps, we can't go alienating Injah already now can we? Probably best just to steal their tea and then make for the coast, wotwot!
I say we steal there diomand, eh sah? Retake the coloneys!

i am just a little worried sir, about re-capturing the raj do you think the natives will mind?

Don't be ridiculous, Blackadder, they positively need our civilising influence, they still inhabit mud huts, and cavort in grass skirts around fires, why, they would welcome us with open arms. Forward brave friends to the Raj!

I thought it was all those in the lower ranks sah, not the land owning gentlemen like us.

well i wouldnt expect it from the gentry no...now chaps here it is, a revised edition of our fine manifesto, any problems i shall be glad to alter.

1. The drinking of tea shall be mandatory, colonial drinks such as “coffee” are strictly prohibited. Tea shall be drunk at the following times Breakfast, Tiffin, Luncheon (in winter and autumn) and any times when one is thirsty and there is a possibility of a brew. Tea shall be referred to as either tea or char.

2. Watching the proms on television is also mandatory as is standing for the British national anthem at all sporting events however it is openly discouraged to sing said anthem in a loud and yobbish manner.

3. Any person from a country which belongs or belonged to the British empire shall be referred to as “damn colonial” innless they are of a friendly and sunny disposition in which case they are to be referred to as “Colonial chap”

4. Any person from a country outside of the Empire or commonwealth is to be referred to as “damn foreigner” or local equivalent e.g. Kraut or yank.

5. The manufacture of Harris Tweed jackets, Bowler hats, Umbrellas and bicycles is to be subsidised.

6. The watching and reading of P.G Wodehouse shall be compulsory.

7. Nationstates shall invest vast amounts of money into the royal navy, Air force and British army.

8. The word “Empire” must be pronounced “Emparh” with reference to that of the British Empire.

9. It is compulsory to wear a pith helmet when in India or Africa.

10. Only the Union jack, crosses of st George, Andrew, and David or of any commonwealth country may be chosen for your national flag.

11. All national mottos must include “rule Britannia” or “god save the queen”

12. All currencies must be renamed the “<something> Pound”.

13. Instead of warnings, forum bans or deletions, the primary method of enforcing NS rules will be to send in a gunboat or set up a blockade or destroy local trade.

14. Celebrating the battles of Agincourt, The taking of Khartoum, Rouks drift Trafalgar and Waterloo is compulsorily on pain of removal of tea rations.

15. The anniversary of Dunkirk shall become a national holiday in commemoration as shall the 6th of the 6th and the battle of Britain.

16. An official moratorium is to be put in place upon the phrases "Well done" and "Congratulations". Instead, the phrase "Jolly good show!" must be used.

17. It is compulsorily to moan about the "bloody weather" at least once per day, or at any time when noticing the weather.

18. NationStates is to apply for Commonwealth membership and recognise the Queen as head of state.

19. The nations favourite televisions programs shall become Dads army, it aint half hot mum, Blackadder and the nations favourite films shall be Zulu, A bridge too far, the dam busters, 633 squadron and carry on up the Khyber.

20. a large wall is to be built at this end of the channel tunnel

21. the Eiffel tower is to be declared the world largest waste of mechano

22. The companies Rolls Royce, Bentley, Morgan, Triumph and Jaguar are to receive all moneys and trading rights presently held by non British motor vehicle companies.

23. A large plaque with the word “Trafalgar” is to be placed in Dover facing the sea towards the continent.

24. People must speak the queens English at all times, people who use common euphemisms such as “aint” and sentences such as “well good” are to be ignored at all times.

25. Everyone will be expected to know the basic rules of cricket which will replace football as the national sport.

26. Modern pubs with names like “Antons” will be destroyed in favour of pubs with names such as the black bear, white swan, red lion, king’s head etc.

27. Golf shall form part of the nation’s national schooling curriculum.

28. Text messages shall be up to encyclopaedia Britannica standards to preserve the queens English.

29. India shall be pronounced "Injah!"

Don't be ridiculous, Blackadder, they positively need our civilising influence, they still inhabit mud huts, and cavort in grass skirts around fires, why, they would welcome us with open arms. Forward brave friends to the Raj!

indeed, i remember umboto gorge ..terrible battle

indeed, i remember umboto gorge ..terrible battle

That was a terribly sharp slice of mango sir...

http://www.pinetreeweb.com/kitchener-master.jpg

All hail Lord Kitchener!

That was a terribly sharp slice of mango sir...

at the end, instead of counting the bodies we simply made a huge fruit salad

25. Everyone will be expected to know the basic rules of cricket which will replace football as the national sport.

What about rugger, sah? that should be the national game eh wot?

26. Modern pubs with names like “Antons” will be destroyed in favour of pubs with names such as the black bear, white swan, red lion, king’s head etc.

Not the kings head sah, thats postivly republican

27. Golf shall form part of the nation’s national schooling curriculum.

No sah! What about the jolly game of rugger!

just of few corrections old bean!

http://www.pinetreeweb.com/kitchener-master.jpg

All hail Lord Kitchener!

have i told of the story of general kitchener and the ostrich?

http://www.pinetreeweb.com/kitchener-master.jpg

All hail Lord Kitchener!
Hurrah!

What about rugger, sah? that should be the national game eh wot?

Not the kings head sah, thats postivly republican

27. Golf shall form part of the nation’s national schooling curriculum.

No sah! What about the jolly game of rugger!

just of few corrections old bean![/QUOTE]

ah, thankue for pointing that out mr Aust. i hope this edition is more to your liking,

1. The drinking of tea shall be mandatory, colonial drinks such as “coffee” are strictly prohibited. Tea shall be drunk at the following times Breakfast, Tiffin, Luncheon (in winter and autumn) and any times when one is thirsty and there is a possibility of a brew. Tea shall be referred to as either tea or char.

2. Watching the proms on television is also mandatory as is standing for the British national anthem at all sporting events however it is openly discouraged to sing said anthem in a loud and yobbish manner.

3. Any person from a country which belongs or belonged to the British empire shall be referred to as “damn colonial” innless they are of a friendly and sunny disposition in which case they are to be referred to as “Colonial chap”

4. Any person from a country outside of the Empire or commonwealth is to be referred to as “damn foreigner” or local equivalent e.g. Kraut or yank.

5. The manufacture of Harris Tweed jackets, Bowler hats, Umbrellas and bicycles is to be subsidised.

6. The watching and reading of P.G Wodehouse shall be compulsory.

7. Nationstates shall invest vast amounts of money into the royal navy, Air force and British army.

8. The word “Empire” must be pronounced “Emparh” with reference to that of the British Empire.

9. It is compulsory to wear a pith helmet when in India or Africa.

10. Only the Union jack, crosses of st George, Andrew, and David or of any commonwealth country may be chosen for your national flag.

11. All national mottos must include “rule Britannia” or “god save the queen”

12. All currencies must be renamed the “<something> Pound”.

13. Instead of warnings, forum bans or deletions, the primary method of enforcing NS rules will be to send in a gunboat or set up a blockade or destroy local trade.

14. Celebrating the battles of Agincourt, The taking of Khartoum, Rouks drift Trafalgar and Waterloo is compulsorily on pain of removal of tea rations.

15. The anniversary of Dunkirk shall become a national holiday in commemoration as shall the 6th of the 6th and the battle of Britain.

16. An official moratorium is to be put in place upon the phrases "Well done" and "Congratulations". Instead, the phrase "Jolly good show!" must be used.

17. It is compulsorily to moan about the "bloody weather" at least once per day, or at any time when noticing the weather.

18. NationStates is to apply for Commonwealth membership and recognise the Queen as head of state.

19. The nations favourite televisions programs shall become Dads army, it aint half hot mum, Blackadder and the nations favourite films shall be Zulu, A bridge too far, the dam busters, 633 squadron and carry on up the Khyber.

20. a large wall is to be built at this end of the channel tunnel

21. the Eiffel tower is to be declared the world largest waste of mechano

22. The companies Rolls Royce, Bentley, Morgan, Triumph and Jaguar are to receive all moneys and trading rights presently held by non British motor vehicle companies.

23. A large plaque with the word “Trafalgar” is to be placed in Dover facing the sea towards the continent.

24. People must speak the queens English at all times, people who use common euphemisms such as “aint” and sentences such as “well good” are to be ignored at all times.

25. Everyone will be expected to know the basic rules of cricket and Rugger which shall replace football and spitting in public as the national sports.

26. Modern pubs with names like “Antons” will be destroyed in favour of pubs with names such as the black bear, white swan, red lion etc.

27. Golf and Rugger shall form part of the nation’s national schooling curriculum.

28. Text messages shall be up to encyclopaedia Britannica standards to preserve the queens English.

my lord praeton.are you satisfied with this?

[Overblown British Stereotype from 19th Century]

I say, what an absolutely wizard idea old chap! I ask to join immediately, and demand that all theatres and moving picture shows show nothing but HMS Pinafore, and re-runs of Ice Cold In Alex, and all war movies about the UK made from 1940 onwards.

And that Sharpe become the national hero!

[/Overblown British Stereotype from 19th Century]

*Cringes*

That was...painful to do...

[Overblown British Stereotype from 19th Century]

I say, what an absolutely wizard idea old chap! I ask to join immediately, and demand that all theatres and moving picture shows show nothing but HMS Pinafore, and re-runs of Ice Cold In Alex, and all war movies about the UK made from 1940 onwards.

And that Sharpe become the national hero!

[/Overblown British Stereotype from 19th Century]

*Cringes*

That was...painful to do...

surely..sharpe was french..

No sah! What about the jolly game of rugger!

just of few corrections old bean!

ah, thankue for pointing that out mr Aust. i hope this edition is more to your liking,

1. The drinking of tea shall be mandatory, colonial drinks such as “coffee” are strictly prohibited. Tea shall be drunk at the following times Breakfast, Tiffin, Luncheon (in winter and autumn) and any times when one is thirsty and there is a possibility of a brew. Tea shall be referred to as either tea or char.

2. Watching the proms on television is also mandatory as is standing for the British national anthem at all sporting events however it is openly discouraged to sing said anthem in a loud and yobbish manner.

3. Any person from a country which belongs or belonged to the British empire shall be referred to as “damn colonial” innless they are of a friendly and sunny disposition in which case they are to be referred to as “Colonial chap”

4. Any person from a country outside of the Empire or commonwealth is to be referred to as “damn foreigner” or local equivalent e.g. Kraut or yank.

5. The manufacture of Harris Tweed jackets, Bowler hats, Umbrellas and bicycles is to be subsidised.

6. The watching and reading of P.G Wodehouse shall be compulsory.

7. Nationstates shall invest vast amounts of money into the royal navy, Air force and British army.

8. The word “Empire” must be pronounced “Emparh” with reference to that of the British Empire.

9. It is compulsory to wear a pith helmet when in India or Africa.

10. Only the Union jack, crosses of st George, Andrew, and David or of any commonwealth country may be chosen for your national flag.

11. All national mottos must include “rule Britannia” or “god save the queen”

12. All currencies must be renamed the “<something> Pound”.

13. Instead of warnings, forum bans or deletions, the primary method of enforcing NS rules will be to send in a gunboat or set up a blockade or destroy local trade.

14. Celebrating the battles of Agincourt, The taking of Khartoum, Rouks drift Trafalgar and Waterloo is compulsorily on pain of removal of tea rations.

15. The anniversary of Dunkirk shall become a national holiday in commemoration as shall the 6th of the 6th and the battle of Britain.

16. An official moratorium is to be put in place upon the phrases "Well done" and "Congratulations". Instead, the phrase "Jolly good show!" must be used.

17. It is compulsorily to moan about the "bloody weather" at least once per day, or at any time when noticing the weather.

18. NationStates is to apply for Commonwealth membership and recognise the Queen as head of state.

19. The nations favourite televisions programs shall become Dads army, it aint half hot mum, Blackadder and the nations favourite films shall be Zulu, A bridge too far, the dam busters, 633 squadron and carry on up the Khyber.

20. a large wall is to be built at this end of the channel tunnel

21. the Eiffel tower is to be declared the world largest waste of mechano

22. The companies Rolls Royce, Bentley, Morgan, Triumph and Jaguar are to receive all moneys and trading rights presently held by non British motor vehicle companies.

23. A large plaque with the word “Trafalgar” is to be placed in Dover facing the sea towards the continent.

24. People must speak the queens English at all times, people who use common euphemisms such as “aint” and sentences such as “well good” are to be ignored at all times.

25. Everyone will be expected to know the basic rules of cricket and Rugger which shall replace football and spitting in public as the national sports.

26. Modern pubs with names like “Antons” will be destroyed in favour of pubs with names such as the black bear, white swan, red lion etc.

27. Golf and Rugger shall form part of the nation’s national schooling curriculum.

28. Text messages shall be up to encyclopaedia Britannica standards to preserve the queens English.
Jolly good show, old boy! Surely we should keep the old version as a quick run-down of our beliefs - but this is a jolly good detailed version we can dispatch to those of a less apathetic persuation posthaste!.

Jolly good show, old boy! Surely we should keep the old version as a quick run-down of our beliefs - but this is a jolly good detailed version we can dispatch to those of a less apathetic persuation posthaste!.


well tally ho, jolly good and zing-zang spirit, im as happy as a chap that just tiled his bathroom realy well sir :) thankue for your apreciation sir.

[Overblown British Stereotype from 19th Century]

I say, what an absolutely wizard idea old chap! I ask to join immediately, and demand that all theatres and moving picture shows show nothing but HMS Pinafore, and re-runs of Ice Cold In Alex, and all war movies about the UK made from 1940 onwards.

And that Sharpe become the national hero!

[/Overblown British Stereotype from 19th Century]

*Cringes*

That was...painful to do...

*points* fith columist! bolshevik!

Bloody marvelous!

Tea and Medals!!!!

This is the funniest thread I've read in a long while old Chap.

Pip Pip, time to go give a good thrashing to a few colonlials.

Bloody marvelous!

Tea and Medals!!!!

This is the funniest thread I've read in a long while old Chap.

Pip Pip, time to go give a good thrashing to a few colonlials.

thankue old boy, be sure to pop in when you have the time

surely..sharpe was french..
No old bean, i think you'll find he was British, but was from the gutter and deserves our distane.

No old bean, i think you'll find he was British, but was from the gutter and deserves our distane.

oh...well i was too young to rememeber the films im' afraid..might buy the books

well gentlemen.whats our first order of buisness?

*Slaps E Blackadder*

That, sir, is for calling Sharpe French, and for calling me a filthy bolshevik. I demand we eat grass before breakfast sir!

*Slaps E Blackadder*

That, sir, is for calling Sharpe French, and for calling me a filthy bolshevik. I demand we eat grass before breakfast sir!

traditionaly you should back hand me with a glove and challenge me to a round of golf.....and no..no grass

traditionaly you should back hand me with a glove and challenge me to a round of golf.....and no..no grass

Actually, the glove is a stereotyped american tradition emphasised in many southern stereotypes. 'Eating grass' is a nineteenth century term for duelling before breakfast; the loser would literally 'eat grass' as he lay on the ground.

Actually, the glove is a stereotyped american tradition emphasised in many southern stereotypes. 'Eating grass' is a nineteenth century term for duelling before breakfast; the loser would literally 'eat grass' as he lay on the ground.

no the glove is french, but i knew not of the term "eat grass" you have expanded my knowledge, thankue, now...whare was i..ah yes you declare a duel i pick what weapons.what say you?

epee' sabre or foil?

We British are very fussy about how words are spelt, so can the manifesto please be changed to have the correct spellings of 'compulsory' and 'moratorium'?

We British are very fussy about how words are spelt, so can the manifesto please be changed to have the correct spellings of 'compulsory' and 'moratorium'?

the new edition does ..

1. The drinking of tea shall be mandatory, colonial drinks such as “coffee” are strictly prohibited. Tea shall be drunk at the following times Breakfast, Tiffin, Luncheon (in winter and autumn) and any times when one is thirsty and there is a possibility of a brew. Tea shall be referred to as either tea or char.

2. Watching the proms on television is also mandatory as is standing for the British national anthem at all sporting events however it is openly discouraged to sing said anthem in a loud and yobbish manner.

3. Any person from a country which belongs or belonged to the British empire shall be referred to as “damn colonial” innless they are of a friendly and sunny disposition in which case they are to be referred to as “Colonial chap”

4. Any person from a country outside of the Empire or commonwealth is to be referred to as “damn foreigner” or local equivalent e.g. Kraut or yank.

5. The manufacture of Harris Tweed jackets, Bowler hats, Umbrellas and bicycles is to be subsidised.

6. The watching and reading of P.G Wodehouse shall be compulsory.

7. Nationstates shall invest vast amounts of money into the royal navy, Air force and British army.

8. The word “Empire” must be pronounced “Emparh” with reference to that of the British Empire.

9. It is compulsory to wear a pith helmet when in India or Africa.

10. Only the Union jack, crosses of st George, Andrew, and David or of any commonwealth country may be chosen for your national flag.

11. All national mottos must include “rule Britannia” or “god save the queen”

12. All currencies must be renamed the “<something> Pound”.

13. Instead of warnings, forum bans or deletions, the primary method of enforcing NS rules will be to send in a gunboat or set up a blockade or destroy local trade.

14. Celebrating the battles of Agincourt, The taking of Khartoum, Rouks drift Trafalgar and Waterloo is compulsorily on pain of removal of tea rations.

15. The anniversary of Dunkirk shall become a national holiday in commemoration as shall the 6th of the 6th and the battle of Britain.

16. An official moratorium is to be put in place upon the phrases "Well done" and "Congratulations". Instead, the phrase "Jolly good show!" must be used.

17. It is compulsorily to moan about the "bloody weather" at least once per day, or at any time when noticing the weather.

18. NationStates is to apply for Commonwealth membership and recognise the Queen as head of state.

19. The nations favourite televisions programs shall become Dads army, it aint half hot mum, Blackadder and the nations favourite films shall be Zulu, A bridge too far, the dam busters, 633 squadron and carry on up the Khyber.

20. a large wall is to be built at this end of the channel tunnel

21. the Eiffel tower is to be declared the world largest waste of mechano

22. The companies Rolls Royce, Bentley, Morgan, Triumph and Jaguar are to receive all moneys and trading rights presently held by non British motor vehicle companies.

23. A large plaque with the word “Trafalgar” is to be placed in Dover facing the sea towards the continent.

24. People must speak the queens English at all times, people who use common euphemisms such as “aint” and sentences such as “well good” are to be ignored at all times.

25. Everyone will be expected to know the basic rules of cricket and Rugger which shall replace football and spitting in public as the national sports.

26. Modern pubs with names like “Antons” will be destroyed in favour of pubs with names such as the black bear, white swan, red lion etc.

27. Golf and Rugger shall form part of the nation’s national schooling curriculum.

28. Text messages shall be up to encyclopaedia Britannica standards to preserve the queens English.


enjoy :D

Well i am off for tiffin.Tally ho

Well i am off for tiffin.Tally ho :D Tiffin! :D
Bring the memsahib a sundowner as well, won't you?

Aye say that we hang anywon who perverts Her Majesty's Language! Wot wot!?

Oh and have you seen the Upper Class Twit of the Yea-ah tooday? It wos a jolly good motch, Lord Frederick the Magnificent Bastard won!

(Bah, must... British-ize myself... too... colonial.)

Well i am off for tiffin.Tally ho
And off you go sah!

Are any of you chaps watching the Last Night of the Proms right now? I know I am.

Jolly good show it is! I say we wotch Monty Python afterwards, wot wot?!

Stop fucking double posting, it's making the thread stupidly long...

Aye say that we hang anywon who perverts Her Majesty's Language! Wot wot!?

Oh and have you seen the Upper Class Twit of the Yea-ah tooday? It wos a jolly good motch, Lord Frederick the Magnificent Bastard won!

(Bah, must... British-ize myself... too... colonial.)

Now now chappy, you're talking like a yank, y'know those damned yanks, oversexed, overpaid, and over here, wot wot!

I say old chap, that really was smashing! A stroke of genious. Anyway, I would like to espress my willingness to her most Imperial Majesty, the Queen. There are still some tories on the colonial side of the atlantic, wot wot! All the better to distance ourselves from the bloody french! Give the buggers the ol' one two!

*breaks into rousing chorus*

"God save our gracious queen! Long live our noble queen!
God save the Queen! Send her victorious, Happy and glorious,
Long to reign over us; God save the queen!"

"Thy choicest gifts in store On her be pleased to pour; Long may she reign!
May she defend our laws, And ever give us cause,
To sing with heart and voice, God save the queen!"

Are any of you chaps watching the Last Night of the Proms right now? I know I am.

i did watch the L.N.O.T.P last night, and of course, stood for the anthem.

Jolly good sah, I must say that this party looks absoloutly spiffing eh wot, certainly you ahve the full support of us true Yorkshire men, sah. And we'll give these damn foreigners a damn good smaching, eh wot.

Yorkshire? What part, old chap? Because if it's any part other than the north I'll be bloody well angry with you for being such a bally poor judge of counties!

Yorkshire? What part, old chap? Because if it's any part other than the north I'll be bloody well angry with you for being such a bally poor judge of counties!


good morning Ankhmet old boy.

i did watch the L.N.O.T.P last night, and of course, stood for the anthem.
Why of course, old chap! Did you have a fleg? I had a fleg and waved it most spectacularly, wotwot!

East Yorkshire >>>>> North Yorkshire

Why of course, old chap! Did you have a fleg? I had a fleg and waved it most spectacularly, wotwot!

No i didnt have a fleg my fleg is too large to wave about like that i think..

Ah, marvellous idea for a party, old boy. I should enjoy participating in this most wonderful of adventures!

Er...that's "make me a member please". Wotwot.

Me? The 13th Duke of Wybourne? Here? In a sixth form girl’s dormitory? At three o’clock in the morning? With my reputation?
What were they thinking of?

You should invade Ireland, and take them back in the UKOGBANI!!! These... commies!!!! :mp5: :gundge:

I want to join!

https://www.readysecure4.com/users/reeferrecordscom/Covers/VST1832.GIF

Oh hello. *sighs* Yet another party standing against us. Well good luck .... but Id obviously rather we (the Emphatically Silly Party) won. But anyway, good luck...

East Yorkshire >>>>> North Yorkshire

No, no no. West Yorkshire>North Yorkshire. Or rather North Riding. It should be Nortth, East and South Riding!

You should invade Ireland, and take them back in the UKOGBANI!!! These... commies!!!! :mp5: :gundge: Bad form, sah, very bad form. We don't use that Yankish word "commie" in dear old Blighty, what! Perish the thought!

I want to join!
Welcome aboard, old chep.

DHomme - I would be much obligued if you would take your Marxist politics and bid us goodday!

Welcome aboard, old chep.

DHomme - I would be much obligued if you would take your Marxist politics and bid us goodday!

Come on DHomme, we know where we're not wanted *turns rounds* Where'd he go? *walks off alone into the sunset*

Come on DHomme, we know where we're not wanted *turns rounds* Where'd he go? *walks off alone into the sunset*
Do you mean to say that you're in the same party! It was my belief that DHomme was in the Revolutionary Trotskyist Party!

Do you mean to say that you're in the same party! It was my belief that DHomme was in the Revolutionary Trotskyist Party!

I sincerely pity the poor fellow, deluded and misguided by the ravings of a lily livered loon.

Yorkshire? What part, old chap? Because if it's any part other than the north I'll be bloody well angry with you for being such a bally poor judge of counties!
I'm from the jolly dales, sah, and I'll have you reamber it. We've got a nice farm and a couple acres here, wot!

As for that Punk Rock merlarkeys (OOC: HEre I go against my own belifs....Hell I'm a bloody communist/punk) I think they should all be locked up for the disrespect to her majestey, eh wot!

I'll never stop hating Britain!

http://users.net.yu/~stopwar/gallery/17/emil_vas_zastmost.jpg


I could make a joke about flaming now. But I wont

Thats out of line, old chap, don't me go to the good old moderators.

I'll never stop hating Britain!

http://users.net.yu/~stopwar/gallery/17/emil_vas_zastmost.jpg


I could make a joke about flaming now. But I wont :eek: :eek: :eek: :eek: WHO ARE THEY? NEO NAZIS?

Thats out of line, old chap, don't me go to the good old moderators.

I'll never stop hating Britain!

http://users.net.yu/~stopwar/gallery/17/emil_vas_zastmost.jpg


I could make a joke about flaming now. But I wont
*wells up with inexplicable rage*

HOW DARE YOU SAH! IF YOU DO NOT DEPART FROM THIS THREAD AT ONCE I SHALL BE FORCED TO CALL THE POLICE! I... I'LL SUMMON THE BUTLER! I SHALL CALL YOU OUT SAH!

*wells up with inexplicable rage*

HOW DARE YOU SAH! IF YOU DO NOT DEPART FROM THIS THREAD AT ONCE I SHALL BE FORCED TO CALL THE POLICE! I... I'LL SUMMON THE BUTLER! I SHALL CALL YOU OUT SAH!

You can't just own a thread man. All property is theft, didn't you know that?

You can't just own a thread man. All property is theft, didn't you know that?
I baluve that if you consult my extensive collection of writs and docments that you will find that my ancestors have owned the lan i live upon for hundreds of years good sir!

I baluve that if you consult my extensive collection of writs and docments that you will find that my ancestors have owned the lan i live upon for hundreds of years good sir!

You'll find your ancestors stole it from the commonfolk at one point so you are in fact handling stolen goods even by your own standards, comrade.

You'll find your ancestors stole it from the commonfolk at one point so you are in fact handling stolen goods even by your own standards, comrade.

*wells up with a righteous anger*

"Why how DARE YOU defile her majesty's flag, how dare you defile Britannia itself! Take yourself and your dirty, evil bolshevism away at once, you accursed ruski! Go back to your dirty muckhole ruled by your "comrades", the very same place that was once glorious and propsering under my good friends, the Tsars. Now begone, lest I summon my guards wielding halberd or I rouse the angry mob to chase your dirty red hide out of glorious Britannia!"

*Runs off to "summon the guards" who will drive the dirty communist swine off of her majesty's land*

*wells up with a righteous anger*

"Why how DARE YOU defile her majesty's flag, how dare you defile Britannia itself! Take yourself and your dirty, evil bolshevism away at once, you accursed ruski! Go back to your dirty muckhole ruled by your "comrades", the very same place that was once glorious and propsering under my good friends, the Tsars. Now begone, lest I summon my guards wielding halberd or I rouse the angry mob to chase your dirty red hide out of glorious Britannia!"

*Runs off to "summon the guards" who will drive the dirty communist swine off of her majesty's land*

Check it out. One more picture

http://rts.gn.apc.org/mayday2k/winnie.jpg

Check it out. One more picture

http://rts.gn.apc.org/mayday2k/winnie.jpg
OOC: Seriously go away.

You know Dhomme, it really says something to post anti British pictures of burning British flags and a picture of a British Hero with TURF on his head on a thread full of British Patriots doesn't it?

You know Dhomme, it really says something to post anti British pictures of burning British flags and a picture of a British Hero with TURF on his head on a thread full of British Patriots doesn't it?

Alright before I was just having a little laugh with the faux nationalists but you gotta be joking me. Churchill was an imperialist racist little weasel who advocated machine gunning striking miners. He's not a hero of mine.

Correction; Churchill was a great wartime leader who inspired the people of Britain to victory against the fascist scum that sought to turn the world into a SIEG HEIL Concert. He did what was neccessary for his country to make sure it wasn't overrun by the Nazi imperialists.

Correction; Churchill was a great wartime leader who inspired the people of Britain to victory against the fascist scum that sought to turn the world into a SIEG HEIL Concert. He did what was neccessary for his country to make sure it wasn't overrun by the Nazi imperialists.

Correction; Churchill was a man who saw that Nazi imperialism was threatening British imperialism and decided to ensure British economic domination of the world must be continued.

Correction; Churchill was a man who saw that Nazi imperialism was threatening British imperialism and decided to ensure British economic domination of the world must be continued.
And this is bad...because?

And this is bad...because?

Imperialism is imperialism no matter which nation runs it.

I'm a Brit and I take pride in poking fun at our grand nation, get over yourself, really...this is meant to be a corny old British party, if you don't like it, you're not wanted in this thread. Get a sense of humour or get out.



"And to all the fellows interested in joining, pop down to my manor house in the countryside for a spot of tea, crumpets and scones! With jam and marmalade, I do pray it goes swimmingly well."



P.S Xeropa, that's awesome about the standard bearer, I myself have lineage back to the Black Prince, the same one who massacred French civilians...bless his cotton socks!

No I won't shutup. It's an offensive stereotype and is in reference to our inglorious past as despoilers of lands and corrupters of men.

The New British Imperialist Party - Manifesto

http://www.simonlevack.com/union%20flag.gif

Welcome to the New British Imperialist Party manifesto, old boy. It's absolutely spiffing to see you, wotwot! Throughout this manifesto I'll do my best to convince you of the benefits to nationstates that would come from the site moving into the light of Britannic civilisation, wot!

Key Points

1) The drinking of tea is mandatory. Any member of NationStates who does not drink at least one cup every 12 hours will get a jolly good talking to! 'Coffee' is banned.

2) Watching (and waving a Union Flag during) the Last Night of the Proms is compulsorary.

3) Anyone from a former part of the British Empire is to be referred to as a "damn colonial".

4) Anyone not from a former part of the British Empire or Britain is to be referred to as a "damn foreigner".

5) The manufacture of tweed jackets, bowler hats and umbrellas is to be subsidised.

6) NationStates shall invest vast sums of money into building a Royal Navy.

7) The word "Empire" must be pronounced "Emparh" with reference to the British Empire.

8) Only the Union Flag, the flag of Scotland, the flag of England or the flag of a Commonwealth Realm may be chosen for your national flag.

9) All national mottos must include "Rule Britannia" or "God Save the Queen".

10) All national currencies must be the "<something> Pound".

11) Instead of warnings, forum bans or deletions, the primary method of enforcing NS rules will be to send in a gunboat.

12) Celebrating the battles of Agincourt, Trafalgar and Waterloo is compulsorary on pain of removal of tea rations.

13) An official moratorium is to be put in place upon the phrases "Well done" and "Congratulations". Instead, the phrase "Jolly good show!" must be used.

14) It is compulsory to moan about the "bloody weather" at least once per day, or at any time when noticing the weather.

15) NationStates is to apply for Commonwealth membership and recognise the Queen as head of state.

Now that that's over, you can all go out and jolly well vote for me, wot!

God Save the Queen!

Current Loyal Britons!

Praetonia (Party Leader)
Kriegorgrad (Party Chairman)
Hogsweat (Senior Party Official)
The Blessed Chris (Honourable Member)
Call to Power (Honourable Member)
The Island of Rose (Honourable Member)
Xeropa (Honourable Member)
E Blackadder (Honourable Member)
Ankhmet (Honourable Member)
Aust (Honourable Member)
Skinny87 (Honourable Member)
Unified Conservatives (Honourable Member)
Makaar (Honourable Member)
Jeleen (Honourable Member)
DontPissUsOff (Honourable Member)

* Praetonia accepts no legal, moral or any other kind of responsibility for the un-PC statements made in his manifesto. Wot!

*stands up*

"Unfortunately, dear Sah, I am not a member of the British Emparh, although I sincerely wish that I was. Therefore I wish to support this party with generous monetary and moral support, and a sincere 'jolly good show!' to you."

*sits back down*

Check it out. One more picture

http://rts.gn.apc.org/mayday2k/winnie.jpg

What you're doing is trolling, DHomme. Your pictures have absolutely no relevance to the topic at hand, so knock it off immediately. This is not a political debate.

Speaking of thread ownership, which you have mentioned before, the original poster has every right to let you know that you're steering the thread into an off-topic, which you have done. Thread ownership in General may not be as strict as in the RP sections, but nevertheless, the thread starter still has some say. You can't just post whatever you want, wherever you want.

* Comes in dressed as a Yank and smashes some british guy with a baseball bat* VIVIA LA REVOLUTION!! DEATH TO KING GEORGE!! Oh wait. Wrong timeline. Im just gonna go find my own.. sorry for* runs away*

* Comes in dressed as a Yank and smashes some british guy with a baseball bat* VIVIA LA REVOLUTION!! DEATH TO KING GEORGE!! Oh wait. Wrong timeline. Im just gonna go find my own.. sorry for* runs away*
Thanks for the quick response, Euro, but it seems someone didn't read the post above.

*mercilessly beat DHomme with a Union Jack*

filthy Bolshevist scum!

Yes...to ensure British economic superiority...because that happened...

Anyway...when's the NBIP going up for the elections?

When we can scrape togather 20,000 pounds sah!At least!

What you're doing is trolling, DHomme. Your pictures have absolutely no relevance to the topic at hand, so knock it off immediately. This is not a political debate.

Speaking of thread ownership, which you have mentioned before, the original poster has every right to let you know that you're steering the thread into an off-topic, which you have done. Thread ownership in General may not be as strict as in the RP sections, but nevertheless, the thread starter still has some say. You can't just post whatever you want, wherever you want.
Thank you Euro.

No I won't shutup. It's an offensive stereotype and is in reference to our inglorious past as despoilers of lands and corrupters of men.

Oh deary me, someone woke up on the bitter side of political ranting today. Offensive? Too bad, everyone will find something offensive and the majority of people take the old English stereotype in good jest, not the dour, grumpy stance you've taken on it.

may I join the home eleven chaps?

may I join the home eleven chaps?
I should think so sah!

Alright before I was just having a little laugh with the faux nationalists but you gotta be joking me. Churchill was an imperialist racist little weasel who advocated machine gunning striking miners. He's not a hero of mine.

imperialist racist..considering that that was the norm at the time you can hardly use that against him..its like saying that a roman centurion was a racist imperialist.

I'll never stop hating Britain!

http://users.net.yu/~stopwar/gallery/17/emil_vas_zastmost.jpg


I could make a joke about flaming now. But I wont

you rotten little bastard if we ever meet i wont think twice of giving you the eaton right hook.

:eek: :eek: :eek: :eek: WHO ARE THEY? NEO NAZIS?

dead! thats who they bleedin are! licence to kill and an sa80 and we'l soon see who's flag is burning!

Well I say, we havent had much activity on this awfully nice thread in the past few days. Too busy watching the cricket I imagine! Well, now that it's over I think it's time for you chaps to get back on here and start drumming up support! It's nearly election time, y'know.

*stands up*

"Unfortunately, dear Sah, I am not a member of the British Emparh, although I sincerely wish that I was. Therefore I wish to support this party with generous monetary and moral support, and a sincere 'jolly good show!' to you."

*sits back down*
bump so you can see, Sah

(This is TIOR speaking)

Good sahs! I propose that we incorporate France into the Emparh!

Those who agree, say aye!

Well I say, we havent had much activity on this awfully nice thread in the past few days. Too busy watching the cricket I imagine! Well, now that it's over I think it's time for you chaps to get back on here and start drumming up support! It's nearly election time, y'know.

Right away sir....heres a campaign poster :D

http://i6.photobucket.com/albums/y201/Cassias/jaldi2.jpg

and i dont think we should take over france..i mean if we do..who will we have to annoy.. they hate us..even if we only see our rivalry as a joke they think we are seriouse

not in the empire? whare do you live old chap?

OOC: That poster, whilst I have no problems with it, might be a tad too...spicy for Jolt and the mods, old chap.

not in the empire? whare do you live old chap?
Alas, Sah, I reside just west of Scotland (read: Norway), and therefore are unfortunately not a member of the Empah. Though, I wish to support the NBIP any way I can.

Alas, Sah, I reside just west of Scotland (read: Norway), and therefore are unfortunately not a member of the Empah. Though, I wish to support the NBIP any way I can.
Good on you sah!

What about rugger, sah? that should be the national game eh wot?



Make a note of that, heavy machineguns for full backs.


I say this sounds like an absolutely spiffing idea, how would one apply for membership to this fine Imperialist adventure? If it is as simple as following the rules that all fine English gentlemen already follow then I would ask that you consider one for admission.

Make a note of that, heavy machineguns for full backs.


I say this sounds like an absolutely spiffing idea, how would one apply for membership to this fine Imperialist adventure? If it is as simple as following the rules that all fine English gentlemen already follow then I would ask that you consider one for admission.
very good sah, I think I speak for all pof us when i say your offically joined. Good sirs, what is our election aim? 1 seat?

Alas, Sah, I reside just west of Scotland (read: Norway), and therefore are unfortunately not a member of the Empah. Though, I wish to support the NBIP any way I can.

well at least youv got a king squire

I say old chaps, I say! I say we invade somthing at least! All this pomp and no lands! We need lands for the Emparh!

how about Bulgaria? those chaps don't seem to be up to much these days

I can't help thinking we should resume the deportation to australia of our criminals, old boy. In fact, wot, maybe we should deport those damn foreigners the americans as well, wotwot. anyway, old chaps, i have whurk to do, so pip pip, and tally ho! *sound of spitfire starting* chocs away, old boy! *VOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOM!*


the english kid

I say old chaps, I say! I say we invade somthing at least! All this pomp and no lands! We need lands for the Emparh!
Jolly good ideas, sah, we havn't invaded jolly old France for a while have we! Lets go! Tally ho!

how about Bulgaria? those chaps don't seem to be up to much these days
By Jove! Bulgaria, Sah? Jolly good idea, although I'd prefer having my tea and crumpets in France, the parts that are soon to be under the Emparh, that is. What are we waiting for, old boy? France under the Emparh! All in favor, say aye!

Aye, sah!

Dashed good idea

Aye!

Oh capital! What a smashing idea. As one of those "bloody colonials," I hereby request admission into your charming social club ... tea room ... political party.

When's the election, old chaps?

When's the election, old chaps?
Not sure sah, we need to begin recuriting, eh wot?

I think we need to hold some kind of seperate canvasing thread. Something for the balley electorate to sink their nashers into. I also propose that from now on we refer to the American war of indepence as the "American Mutiny".

Hear hear.

Bloody good show..i say..are we still on for this?

I wam good sir!

Since the Party leadership seem to be ineffective at this moment, I have begun the crusade to lead the NBIP to victory. I've already created a post in the Election thread (http://forums.jolt.co.uk/showpost.php?p=9728146&postcount=29). Valiant fellow members, vote for the NBIP in the General Election.

We Shall prevail!

Say, we only have five votes. Huffle up and vote Sah! For the Emparh!

We only have Five votes in the Election so far. The only people we are beating are the Rodents. We. Must.Vote!

ENGLAND EXPECTS THAT EVERY MAN SHALL DO HIS DUTY - VOTE FOR US HERE: http://forums.jolt.co.uk/showthread.php?t=447132

well, im a bloody colonalist, but can i join?

So long as you pledge allegience to Her Majesty the Queen, then yes. And drink lots of tea, of course.

quite, then.
I pledge my allegiance to Her Almighty Majesty The Queen. And, I have just consumed a gallon of tea.

well done sah, good fellows I have preposed that i give a free sheep t everyone who votes for NBIP. I only have 5,000 to give away though chaps and then I'm down to cows, dogs, rabbits (Dead), and some mice I found in the jolly old barn.

11 votes in at last count gentlemen. the leaders have 14

By Jove! That just won't make it! Vote now, for the Emparh!

By Jove! That just won't make it! Vote now, for the Emparh!

perhaps we should let the working classes vote..??.. :p what would Gladstone do now i wonder...

Sah! I cannot speak for my fellow ESPers, but I for one (and possibly carops for two) am English and drink lots of tea! I may not be as damn proud of the Queen as you, and I may think the Euro is quite a good idea, but I at least stand for the right of every schoolchild to have tea included in all school meals! I therefore propose an alliance, sah, at least on certian issues, whereby we may indeed control a large proportion of the vote sah! Please reply soon!

Sah! I cannot speak for my fellow ESPers, but I for one (and possibly carops for two) am English and drink lots of tea! I may not be as damn proud of the Queen as you, and I may think the Euro is quite a good idea, but I at least stand for the right of every schoolchild to have tea included in all school meals! I therefore propose an alliance, sah, at least on certian issues, whereby we may indeed control a large proportion of the vote sah! Please reply soon!


now look here my good man..i am all for the European Union as long as were running it and the blasted frogs are forced to watch Sharpe..now..you propose an old style Whigs,libs and peelite coalitioneh?...hmm..well i am only a sort of lower ranking member and will have to ask lord Praetonia and other members of our aristocracy...
P.S i Wrote the other version of our consitution.the one with the trafalgar plauqe ;)

(Honourable Member)



you spelt honorable wrong :p

you spelt honorable wrong :p



....you must be American

I for one welcome our fraternal comrades in the ESP as fellow englishmen (and women). Let us join together, control the Parliament and dominate the political scene together!

....you must be American
I believe that, according to your manifesto, he is actually a damn foreigner!
EDIT: I for one welcome our fraternal comrades in the ESP as fellow englishmen (and women). Let us join together, control the Parliament and dominate the political scene together!
Sah! (no one else is online except I V Stalin, so it might just be me that wants the alliance, but hey, I say go for it!)

The Tribes Of Longton - I've been looking at your party and you seem like a good bunch of awfully nice chaps. I can tell you that, if my Honourable colleagues agree, an alliance would be practically spiffing!

you spelt honorable wrong :p
*splutters* Blasted colonials! That's the last time you make me spill my tea with your terrible spelling, I can tell you!

*unlocks gun cabinet and takes out a blunderbus*

I believe that, according to your manifesto, he is actually a damn foreigner!

under the Revised addition

Maniffesto 2005 E Blackadder
which is accepted by his Lordship Praetonia and many more
He is a "Damn colonial!"

The Tribes Of Longton - I've been looking at your party and you seem like a good bunch of awfully nice chaps. I can tell you that, if my Honourable colleagues agree, an alliance would be practically spiffing!


*splutters* Blasted colonials! That's the last time you make me spill my tea with your terrible spelling, I can tell you!

*unlocks gun cabinet and takes out a blunderbus*

Go on sah! Give him give him the British Lead and fire!

I would join, old chap, but I'm a bit tied up in England as it is. Terribly sorry. Might look you up later, though.

I say lads, those bloody colonials have entered these hallowed halls! Her Majesty will be furious, I daresay. Still, all in all a spiffing job. Jolly good show making me an honourary member, chaps, and I hope that my vote for the NBIP shall onbce more allow fair Britannia to rule the waves, what!

I say lads, those bloody colonials have entered these hallowed halls! Her Majesty will be furious, I daresay. Still, all in all a spiffing job. Jolly good show making me an honourary member, chaps, and I hope that my vote for the NBIP shall onbce more allow fair Britannia to rule the waves, what!

work is in progress to have you recruited..please observe

: Praetonia sah?! May this chap join up what?

He already has, Sir E Blackadder, wot!

He already has, Sir E Blackadder, wot!

oh rite o sir ..um..are you on the "all america needs is a bit of english imperialism thread? those damn fith collumists dare call themselves british! Bolshevicks! *Eye twitch*

Quite. Personally I dont want America to become Imperialist. The colonials are powerful enough as they are without them taking a leaf out of our book.

Quite. Personally I dont want America to become Imperialist. The colonials are powerful enough as they are without them taking a leaf out of our book.

I agree your grace..but i wish we still owned them..t'would be a tremendous boon

Indeed. We would be almighty. Sadly they put paid to us in the first and second world wars.

Indeed. We would be almighty. Sadly they put paid to us in the first and second world wars.

well only the second..the first one was being won in 1916 true enoguh though those colonials did supply tremendous numbers in war time..then again many of them beleive in a global government!

They bankrupted us. The First World War removed our ability to fight the second, and lend-lease destroyed the financial grounding of the Empire.

They bankrupted us. The First World War removed our ability to fight the second, and lend-lease destroyed the financial grounding of the Empire.

the filthy colonial bastards!

OOC: Our latest propaganda post - I thought I'd bump the thread with it:

The New British Imperialist Party

http://i2.photobucket.com/albums/y12/Skinny87/union-jack.gif

Do you REALLY want the Socialists to come to power? Are you REALLY in favour of a totalitarian dictatorship in the General Forums? Are the Liberals and the Conservatives just too boring for you? Do you Love your Country?

If so, then join the NBIP. We believe in a strong forum, with a large defense budget, the restoration of the Monarchy, and above all, the required drinking of Tea and moaning about the weather!

Do your Forum, and your Country right, by voting NBIP!

So long as you pledge allegience to Her Majesty the Queen, then yes. And drink lots of tea, of course.

Can we drink tea and execute the royal family in Cromwellian British Tradition? :p

Can we drink tea and execute the royal family in Cromwellian British Tradition? :p
By Jove! We've got ourselves a traitor in here! A Frenchy! It almost made me spill my tea!

Well I suppose if its cromwellian then we can have all the fun of revolution then after we've finished another Royal pops up and we can get back to normal. I little drastic I grant but its very "earth friendly" I little like a sustainable forest.

http://i2.photobucket.com/albums/y12/Skinny87/union-jack.gif

The New British Imperialist Party

Do you hate political infighting?

Tired of the Socialists blaming everything on everyone?

Just want a party that does what it says and doesn't play blame games?


Then the NBIP is for you. We just want a good, decent election, without the usual backstabbing and squabbling. That, and a good cup of tea.


Vote NBIP!

Well said sah!

Where near the top my good gentlemen, but who shall be our MP? What if we get 2 MP's? I volouteer myself for this dangerious mission sah! After all I am giving out the sheep, don't you agree gentlemen?

And the Colonials didn't help us in the 2nd Great War, or the 1st. if they hadn't joined in then the Communists would have ahd to all the work, and there'd be less damm Socialists in the world, eh wot.

Democratic Socialist Party - 36 - 14.75%
Emphatically Silly Party - 35 - 14.34%
Mole and Other Burrowing Rodents Alliance - 9 - 3.69%
New British Imperialist Party - 28 - 11.48%
NS Classic Liberals - 23 - 9.43%
NS Conservative Party - 33 - 13.52%
Reason Party - 34 - 13.93%
Revolutionary Trotskyist Party - 13 - 5.33%
United Democratic Communist Party - 33 - 13.52%

*******************************************************

By Jove! We're on the sixth place! We must mobilize our forces and vote Sahs! Vote, for the Emparh!

Well said sah!

Where near the top my good gentlemen, but who shall be our MP? What if we get 2 MP's? I volouteer myself for this dangerious mission sah! After all I am giving out the sheep, don't you agree gentlemen?

And the Colonials didn't help us in the 2nd Great War, or the 1st. if they hadn't joined in then the Communists would have ahd to all the work, and there'd be less damm Socialists in the world, eh wot.

I suggest that we elect MPs down the roster list, eg, Praetonia - Kriegorgrad - Hogsweat - next of position, etc.

I agree with Hogsweat on this position. We also need more votes, darn it.

Indeed good sahs we must, how many MP's do we get with That much of the vote?

We have around 10% of the vote, which is about two MPs. We need two more percent to get another MP.

Okay, so we need 1 more MP.... How many for 4?

We have to reamber as well good sirs, that we are one of the newer partys, and have few members, thus our main aim for the next term should be to gain more members and publicity, then in the next election we can give the blighters a jolly good thrashing, eh wot!

Right-o.

As a damn colonial.... I APPROVE!

Where 5th but the UDCP are catacable!

Just out of interest, do the tycoons in the NBIP strongly uphold the values of Lassez-Faire i.e. no unions, the bosses control all etc., or are you attempting a more social policy e.g. letting the workers have a meal every four days instead of 10?

Well of course, only very fat people who smoke too many cigars will be allowed to own businesses, but we generally feel that unions are optional. We wont ban them, but if they get too Bolshy we fully support cavalry charges to sort 'em out, wot wot!

PS. Lassez-faire =/= banning unions. Get yer ideologies right!

Just out of interest, do the tycoons in the NBIP strongly uphold the values of Lassez-Faire i.e. no unions, the bosses control all etc., or are you attempting a more social policy e.g. letting the workers have a meal every four days instead of 10?
^^^^ There are elements (one person) of the NBIP that is more socialist than the others.

Old bean, where can one join this party? Being a Englishman and patriotic, I believe that it is my duty to God and the Queen to join this party.

I say, jolly good show chaps with this party and all. You have my vote, old bean. Yes, where would an english lady like myself go to join this party?