NationStates Jolt Archive

You must make your post in the form of a haiku - and it must be political.
IF you're skilled enough, it will be an answer to the previous poster.

So here's the start...


John Kerry hunting ducks
Thinking he's fooling rednecks
Sad - that dog won't hunt

John Kerry hunting ducks
Thinking he's fooling rednecks
Sad - that dog won't hunt

Bush says Noo-cu-lur
Thinking he's fooling rednecks
Sad- that dog will hunt

Bush hates gay Marriage,
Atheists and Foreigners,
Damn - there goes progress

EDIT: There are now five syllables in the first line. This is my first ever Haiku. I'm quite proud

Bush hates gay Marriages,
Atheists and Foreigners,
Damn - there goes progress
I'm sorry but that is very good :P

I'm sorry but that is very good :P
There are 6 syllables on the first line of it...
:(
It still rocks though.

:fluffle: :fluffle: :fluffle: :D :D

Yay!

Brought to you as an amalgam of Bushisms from the debates:

Gynocologists
practicing their love. Bush asks:
Do you need some wood?

America spends,
Trade gap soars, while dollar sinks.
Depression? Hope not.

Brought to you as an amalgam of Bushisms from the debates:

Gynocologists
practicing their love. Bush asks:
Do you need some wood?
:p
That's awesome!

Tony the Lap Dog
Eats from Bush's arse crevice,
Brown noser or what!

EDIT: OK so it's poor and crude. I just want some :fluffle: ! :(

EDIT: OK so it's poor and crude. I just want some :fluffle: ! :(
:(
We all love you anyway!
:fluffle:

Tony the Lap Dog
Eats from Bush's arse crevice,
Brown noser or what!

EDIT: OK so it's poor and crude. I just want some :fluffle:
:fluffle:

Osama destroys
Bush invades, Osama flees
Never to be found

PS. gimme some slack. This is my first try. Ever

"Iraq has WMD.
We must save the world" says Bush
"From this evil man"


Robert Kilroy Silk,
Bigoted Euroskeptic,
Kicked out of UKIP (pr. you-kip)

:fluffle:

Osama destroys
Bush invades, Osama flees
Never to be found

PS. gimme some slack. This is my first try. Ever
That's good!

Muslims must be bad
Because George Bush says it's true
Quick, grab a weapon!

"Iraq has WMD.
We must save the world" says Bush
"From this evil man"
Stupid lying scum
Controls lots of WMDs:
George Bush, not Saddam

"We need war on drugs!"
Fill prisons with innocents
Oh well- That's 'justice'

That's good!

Muslims must be bad
Because George Bush says it's true
Quick, grab a weapon!

Iraqis put up fight,
Bush say "you will not play fair
So we n00k j00 lol"

"We need war on drugs!"
Fill prisons with innocents
Oh well- That's 'justice'
lol

Guantanamo Bay,
Full of bad men - Muslim most;
Lack of Human rights

Edit: Steeped in sarcasm in the second line (the word 'bad')

lol

Guantanamo Bay,
Full of bad men - Muslim most;
Lack of Human rights
Along those lines...

"These men need no trial
They are terrorists, you see..."
But how will you know?

Stupid lying scum
Controls lots of WMDs:
George Bush, not Saddam

Ha ha ha.

Howard's a vampire
It's on the Labour website
So it must be true

(is using contractions cheating?)

"No ability
To make WMDs"
Oops! We are sorry.

Don't mind us
As we tiptoe quietly out
Good luck on your vote.


[okay, okay, I know the US isn't pulling out, it's just a haiku joke]

Ha ha ha.

Howard's a vampire
It's on the Labour website
So it must be true

(is using contractions cheating?)
nope. Oh, and may I add: ROFLMAO!!!!!!!!!!1111shift+1eleven!

Mister Poll Tax works
Against prat with big jug ears,
What to vote? Go Green

Blunkett has a fling,
Silly man, forced to resign,
Good riddence I say

You must make your post in the form of a haiku - and it must be political.
IF you're skilled enough, it will be an answer to the previous poster.

So here's the start...


John Kerry hunting ducks
Thinking he's fooling rednecks
Sad - that dog won't hunt

If you knew haiku
Maybe you would notice that
Your first line has six

Some older political haikus I've done:

Fadwa Barghouti
Gives Palestine a real choice
They can choose more war

Villahermosa
If you change your underwear
Terrorists have won

Bloody name changes;
Muslims are now Islamists -
People, insurgents

France won't fight a war,
Freedom fries? How pathetic
Call them chips like us

Bloody name changes;
Muslims are now Islamists -
People, insurgents

Insurgent, how strange,
You know you cannot insurge
into your own land?

Insurgent, how strange,
You know you cannot insurge
into your own land?
I really wish the media wouldn't call them insurgents. It's just pointless hype to make it right that we have taken over their country. But back to haikus:

Iraq is conquered
Oil stolen, much life lost.
Consult RoadMap - Iran?

foreign fighters found
syria is serious
borders bleed buckets

I really wish the media wouldn't call them insurgents. It's just pointless hype to make it right that we have taken over their country. But back to haikus:

Iraq is conquered
Oil stolen, much life lost.
Consult RoadMap - Iran?

It's a treasure hunt.
like finding eggs at Easter,
But with WMD

I have two essays,
that are due for tomorrow,
But haikus are fun

Am I going mad
I only think in haiku,
Damn these sylables

The PATRIOT ACT,
Willl surely destroy us all,
Just ask Micheal Moore

I have two essays,
that are due for tomorrow,
But haikus are fun

Am I going mad
I only think in haiku,
Damn these sylables
Damn this Haiku fun,
Revision goes down the lav,
Sod it, these are great

This is my only
Form of decent poetry
The Japanese Rock!

Cartoons not for kids,
Manga, other Anime
Proves my point with gore

Back to politics,
Still maintain that Japan's cool
George Bush is a dick

Damn this Haiku fun,
Revision goes down the lav,
Sod it, these are great

This is my only
Form of decent poetry
The Japanese Rock!

Cartoons not for kids,
Manga, other Anime
Proves my point with gore

Back to politics,
Still maintain that Japan's cool
George Bush is a dick

Revision for what?
May I ask, not be rude,
Good luck anyway

I've a bad habit,
I take things too far, like this,
I need to be slapped,

The Lib Dem MP
Lembit Opik, what a fruit,
Not funny, just true

When Dennis Skinner,
Enters parliament he kicks
Blunkett's dog Sadie.

(OK out of date, but he did kick Lucy)

When Ian Paisley
Looked at the peace agreement
He said, No, No, No.

Cheerleaders are cool
they form pyramids all day
without complaining

Revision for what?
May I ask, not be rude,
Good luck anyway
.
You're missing a 'to'.

Cheerleaders are cool
they form pyramids all day
without complaining
Cheerleaders are cool
they have multi-partner sex
without comlpaining :D

Revision for what?
May I ask, not be rude,
Good luck anyway

Damn A2 Physics,
Chemistry, Biology,
Economics ARRGH!

The PATRIOT ACT,
Willl surely destroy us all,
Just ask Micheal Moore

Moore's got that one right
But even a broken clock
Is right twice a day

Damn A2 Physics,
Chemistry, Biology,
Economics ARRGH!

Physics never nice,
Especially for A2,
But Maths was much worse. ;)
And thank you Neo-Anarchists

Also:

Dog leashes and hoods;
quelle amazing trendsetters
in Abu Ghraib

Moore's got that one right
But even a broken clock
Is right twice a day
This is very true
Problem being that the clock
Is wrong more often

States need a new clock
Replace the old one, also
Replace the old cock

In case you don't know,
I do not like George Bush much
He's a fucking tit

Also:

Dog leashes and hoods;
quelle amazing trendsetters
in Abu Ghraib
Dense US Army,
Taking pictures of their crimes,
Proof of low IQs

Illuminati,
Secret rulers of the world.
No really. Honest

Illuminati,
Secret rulers of the world.
No really. Honest
Prieure du Sion,
pwns the illuminati
Knights Templar still best

Illuminati,
Secret rulers of the world.
No really. Honest
"Always watching us!"
"Cameras in my bathroom!"
Can you say "looney"?

Prieure du Sion,
pwns the illuminati
Knights Templar still best
"Prieure du Sion?
What's that? Old and dead, I say!
Honor duel at dawn!"
:D

"Prieure du Sion?
What's that? Old and dead, I say!
Honor duel at dawn!"
:D
We'd better be quiet
Or the catholic church will come
With the COMFY CHAIR!

We'd better be quiet
Or the catholic church will come
With the COMFY CHAIR!
"ACK! The COMFY CHAIR!"
Scream victims- their comfy doom
Will be eternal.

For truth you must
Dan Brown's Da Vinci Code and
Angels and demons.
</sarcasm>

We'd better be quiet
Or the catholic church will come
With the COMFY CHAIR!
Ahh, Jack Chick was right.
Jesuit assassins, help.
They will murder me!

For truth you must
Dan Brown's Da Vinci Code and
Angels and demons.
</sarcasm>
You forgot a 'read'.

For truth you must
Dan Brown's Da Vinci Code and
Angels and demons.
</sarcasm>
Driving cop car
Through French parks, not possible
Due to lots of steps

Able to see all
Four Major Parisienne
Galleries - no way

Louvre has security
Infra-red and quiet alarms
Too costly by far

When you think about
The content of Dan Brown's Books,
You see the Bullshit

Ahh, Jack Chick was right.
Jesuit assassins, help.
They will murder me!
Relax, place trust now
In Torching Witches - be saved
For he shall hit Chick

You forgot a 'read'.
If only we could morph together, that way I would never accidently leave out words in my haikus :)

Relax, place trust now
In Torching Witches - be saved
For he shall hit Chick
Where has TWitches gone? [OK I cheated a bit]
will he ever return here?
To save us from Chick?

Where has TWitches gone? [OK I cheated a bit]
will he ever return here?
To save us from Chick?
One should not question
The Holy quest of TWitches
For he seeks the Pie

The one true Pie
Shall save us from saintly folk
And bathe us in fun

Bush hunts "Dead Enders".
Minority he says lying.
More than US troops.

People do not see
That tax is legal money
with menaces. True

Libertarian
People don't know what it means
Libertarian

I must go to bed.
No homework done on this night.
Addictive NS

I tole em, I did.
Buggrit, Millennium hand
And Shrimp, I tole em

Asylum Seekers,
Such a contentious subject.
Fuck the BNP.

I would like to see
Nick Griffin risk life and limb
Just to reach Britain.

If Britain's culture
Is so weak that it will be
Destroyed, then Fuck it.

UKIP, what a joke,
Raving against the EU,
With much vitriol.

When their MEPs
Claim all of the expenses
They are allowed to

Since 97
Labour have been in power,
Wolves in sheeps clothing

They act socialist
But are tories in disguise
Blair; Thatcher junior.

Cons are no better,
The are 'cons' for a reason,
And nothing has changed

Thatcher has gone now,
But the rest are all there still
All the crooks and thieves

We are going to hell
And to stop whilst halfway down,
very unlikely

Libertarian
People don't know what it means
Libertarian

I'm an anarchist,
Which is not a nihilist,
Like people assume

I must go to bed.
No homework done on this night.
Addictive NS

I tole em, I did.
Buggrit, Millennium hand
And Shrimp, I tole em

lol, Terry Prattchett
completely pwns everyone,
No one disagree

About Bush's Success also called the Laugh Haiku

Ha ha ha ha ha
ha ha ha ha ha ha ha
ha ha ha ha ha

Any way we're not going into depression since if we stop playing police and stop sending aid then we will have a great surpluss of money

china defeated
by Japan in WW2
how funny eh

War is easier:

Nuclear winter
something not good or bad since
humans are evil

or backwards

To live is to be
Evil since they're opposites
they exist for balance

haiku is simple.

another favorite
smite smite smite smite smite
smite smite smite smite smite smite smite
smite smite smite smite auggggh (As in a death cry. One syllable)

syzygy is one
of two words six letters long
without vowels boo. (Didn't see that coming. The other is Rythmn or Rthymn however you spell it)

most things are too long
like romeo and juliet

Elect the Tories
And Micheal Howard will take
Buffy off the air

Watch out U.S.A.
Strong eagle judging, killing
You too will be judged.

Enemies at gate
Think who wants you to see them
Are they really there?

A new free Iraq
An ideal bought in blood
Was it all worth it?

Guantanamo Bay
Imprisoned to save freedom?
I say Hippocrites!

At Abu-Gharib
A man screams, tortured by us
"With justice for all"?

Bush reelected
Fifty-one percent stupid
the country that is

Me, I still like France
Though target of U.S. hate
She was our midwife.


(historical politics)
Ode to McCarthy
Thanks, now all fear other views
score one : ignorance.
(/historical politics)

Xenophobia
'All differences evil'?
'Yes, son, wipe them out.'
(I know, I know, it sucks. So what?)

Oh, and bump.

syzygy is one
of two words six letters long
without vowels boo. (Didn't see that coming. The other is Rythmn or Rthymn however you spell it)

You mean "Rhythm"?

Why so much debate?
Government is here to help
I guess they forgot

---------

what's racism for?
just different shades of grey
I don't understand

Why so much debate?
Government is here to help
I guess they forgot

---------

what's racism for?
just different shades of grey
I don't understand

"Here to help? No way!
Extort and rape for profit!"
No rights for us all.

Pym Fortuyn he was
A gay queer fag cock sucker
A light for mankind

"Here to help? No way!
Extort and rape for profit!"
No rights for us all.

Unless you’re George Bush
Rights are now a privilege
Save Haliburton

There once was a man
Who was born in Nantucket
He was not George Bush

****
It's a new thing I'm experimenting with, "Limeraiku" :sniper:

HE HATES ME's haiku.
Has trite, silly images;
He needs counseling.

Pym Fortuyn he was
A gay queer fag cock sucker
A light for mankind
Insulting gays now?
Must we all be bitter so?
Forgive and forget.

George is a mouthpiece
Everytime his lips open
Dickie's voice comes out.

Shallow words of spite
Spring from impotence - or sloth
Hate, easy it is

Lichtenstein is cool
They never hurt anyone
George Bush is not there

There once was a man
Who was born in Nantucket
He was not George Bush

****
It's a new thing I'm experimenting with, "Limeraiku" :sniper:
I like it!
To top it off, we must set them to music.
:D

George is a mouthpiece
Everytime his lips open
Dickie's voice comes out.

Hee, silly image
Springs to mind at this mention.
Dick- in Bush's mouth

(So it's juvenile humor... SO WHAT??)

Blab, et cetera -
They say, "who is Pym Fortuyn?"
Showing ignorance.

Pym was flamboyant
He fought against those who hate
His free way of life.

If I were in charge
All nations would have required
Cheerleader Haiku

If I were in charge
All nations would have required
Cheerleader Haiku
Cheerleader Haiku?
What is this of which you speak?
It sounds amusing.

Cheerleaders in Congress
Would make me watch C-SPAN more
Liberty and skirts

Cheerleaders in Congress
Would make me watch C-SPAN more
Liberty and skirts
C-SPAN, too stuffy-
Needs cheerleaders very much.
Increase ratings lots!

Cheerleaders in government... It's a concept I'm in favor of.....

If big football teams
Can have cheerleaders, then why
Not my Senator?

GOOOOooooooo, House Appropriations Fund!!!! Gimme an "A"!!! etc., etc.
(I'm mostly onto this concept for strictly prurient - uh, I mean scientific, reasons)

:D

C-SPAN, too stuffy-
Needs cheerleaders very much.
Increase ratings lots!Networks are too scared
Of the FCC's fines for
Wardrobe malfunctions.

Blab, et cetera -
They say, "who is Pym Fortuyn?"
Showing ignorance.Sorry HE HATE ME
I misunderstood your poem
Thought you were swearing.

Pym? Huh? At first glance,
I thought of Magnus. Too much
time in A.S.H.

This is the best thread
I have been laughing quite hard
At all the great posts

From 1st thru the last
All pages are amusing
Thank you and Good Night!

:fluffle:

OH SHI OH SHI OH
SHI OH SHI OH SHI OH SHI
OH SHI OH SHI OH

terrorisme is bad,
but we all know what's worse.
the rightwing nutjobs!

A rightwing nutjob
Makes me squeal "Oh Shi Oh Shi"
Damn, I need to sleep :p

A rightwing nutjob
Makes me squeal "Oh Shi Oh Shi"
Damn, I need to sleep :p
"Sleep? What is this sleep?
This is unneeded, I say!"
More caffeine you need.

Crap, I made coffee
I will quote Warren Zevon
I'll sleep when I'm dead

terrorisme is bad,
but we all know what's worse.
the rightwing nutjobs!Poor are terrorists
Wars of liberation are
For wealthy nations.

A rightwing nutjob
Makes me squeal "Oh Shi Oh Shi"
Damn, I need to sleepYou are so witty
I could not stop laughing and
Rolling on the floor.

Crap, I made coffee
I will quote Warren Zevon
I'll sleep when I'm deadCoffee smells so good
But for an energy boost
Coke is much better. :D

(best John Cleese voiceover)
*And now, for something completely different*

France, Napoleon
He was a real short dude
He was emperor

Pepe Lepeau, French
Americans like cartoons
Strange what forms bias

Martha Stewart, jail
I think that she wants to be
Emperor of France

:D

(No hidden meaning or real political agenda in the above, just the random Haiku babblings of a sleep-deprived mind - Please pardon Us For The Inconvenience)

Coffee smells so good
But for an energy boost
Coke is much better. :D
Energy quotient?
Both of you are beat by this:
Caffeine pills. Ha ha.

Wait, something better!
Go pills win this, no doubt.
Methamphetamine!

Mexico was cool
Because Coke was very cheap
Gee college was fun

:cool:

Mexico was cool
Because Coke was very cheap
Gee college was fun

:cool:
Mexico had this:
An apple pop of some sort
Not in States, too bad.

(Yay, I can write haiku about Mexican soda!)

Legalize all drugs,
Amsterdam is a hip place,
Colorado is not

Gen'ralfeldmarshcall
Walter von Reichenau does
Wear a monocle

In Deutschland, "Spaezi"
Is Cola and Lemon mixed
It is a weird drink

Gen'ralfeldmarshcall
Walter von Reichenau does
Wear a monocle
Ow! This monocle
Is sharp, my face is bleeding
profusely! I die!

Monocles are fun
The "Pringles" chip guy wears one
He'd make a great king

Monocles are fun
The "Pringles" chip guy wears one
He'd make a great king
"All hail Pringle King!
Ruler great, this man will make!"
Chant enraptured crowd.

Absolutism.
Is it the best rule for me?
Yes, if I get chips.

A little water
has never killed anyone
tsunamis do, though

We give them money
so they can remove the dead
from Beach Paradise

Seems like we forget
that the children in Darfur
are just as dying

Perhaps if the Brits
Had King Pringle running things
Fish & Chips for all

(ducking thrown rotten vegetables for extra-crappy Haiku) :p

Forces of Nature
Teach humility to us,
We are all mortal

Where is Darfur?
Children worldwide are wasted
By a curse of hate

Cursed are those who fear.
For they will never know
profound happiness

Read this URL
man is crueller than nature,
it certainly seems

http://www.savedarfur.org/

I fear small robots
And badgers, and Carrot Top
I cannot kill fear

Thanks, Squealopia.
I was not aware how big
The Sudan mess was

Haiku is a fix
Like shooting smack, or a cig
I am an addict

I fear small robots
And badgers, and Carrot Top
I cannot kill fear

Carrot Top is bad
his flaming red hair predicts
the Apocalypse

Perhaps if the Brits
Had King Pringle running things
Fish & Chips for allFamous are fish and
Chips but I thought lasagna
Was better at pubs.

Martha Stewart, jail
I think that she wants to be
Emperor of FranceMartha's a small one
They let all the big fish like
Ken Lay swim away

Seems like we forget
that the children in Darfur
are just as dyingFunny you say this,
Iraq's people dying too
War gets no relief.

Haiku is a fix
Like shooting smack, or a cig
I am an addict

It's like heroin
there will be only haikus
for days and days and...

Carrot Top is bad
his flaming red hair predicts
the Apocalypse

Lmao-

Carrot Top scares me
He smoked too much 'Janjaweed'
He is not funny

I should be working
I am, after all, at work
haikus are more fun

Hallucinations
So beautifully they swirl
Oil film on water

Red states or blue states.
I'm not too thrilled with either.
Give me a green state!

[QUOTE=imported_Blab]Martha's a small one
They let all the big fish like
Ken Lay swim awayQUOTE]

What really is weird
Is Ken Lay not shot dead by
former Enron staff

Funny you say this,
Iraq's people dying too
War gets no relief.

True, Darfur was just
an example of cruelty.
Iraq? SO last year.

Work is just money
Haiku refreshes your soul
Otherwise it droops

Red states or blue states.
I'm not too thrilled with either.
Give me a green state!

Nader, Nader, yay!
Yay yay yay Nader Nader!
Nader, I like him.

New York state of mind...
Some folks like to get away..
Take a holiday..

(Thank You Billy Joel, you Master HaikuMeister You!!!)

Work is just money
Haiku refreshes your soul
Otherwise it droops

That is very true;
I shall be forced to pick it
up from the floor. D'oh.

(Haha, okay, so I didn't really try. Sorry. :p)

Gee poems are fun!!!!
Who knew!!!??? Not this cowboy.
Now I'll read Shakespeare!

Shakespeare wrote stuff in
Iambic Pentameter
Haiku he no do.

It's like heroin
there will be only haikus
for days and days and...

Haiku perverts mind
All I think divided now
in syllable groups

Haikus like PeaCe Pills
Speech impediment, soon I
will speak in haiku.

Blair, Bush, both use "B"
Coincidence? I think not.
Conspiracy fun.

Gee poems are fun!!!!
Who knew!!!??? Not this cowboy.
Now I'll read Shakespeare!

Shakespeare wrote stuff in
Iambic Pentameter
Haiku he no do.

Will you marry me?
we could write haikus all day
and be intlecktschul!!

True, Darfur was just
an example of cruelty.
Iraq? SO last year.To the people who die
So last year or example
Are meaningless words.

What really is weird
Is Ken Lay not shot dead by
former Enron staffAs far as I know
The bastard is still kicking
This (http://www.kenlayinfo.com/public/default.aspx) is his website

Japanese poets,
Did they imagine us when
Creating this art?

My favorite thing
From Japan is their Haiku
And Sonny Chiba

Funniest haiku
Are the ones on computers
Have you heard of them?

To the people who die
So last year or example
Are meaningless words.

As far as I know
The bastard is still kicking
This (http://www.kenlayinfo.com/public/default.aspx) is his website

Money buys Justice
In America, for Ken.
He deserves bad things.

Haiku perverts mind
All I think divided now
in syllable groups

Haikus like PeaCe Pills
Speech impediment, soon I
will speak in haiku.

Basho wrote haiku
That soothed minds with images
Pretty pictures all.

To the people who die
So last year or example
Are meaningless words.


Are you sure of that?
I think they'd find my haikus
amusing, at least.

Sorry for being
offensive, but I really
just can't help myself.

One who likes word play
Can never be offensive
But self restraint's best.

Funniest haiku
Are the ones on computers
Have you heard of them?
Yes, assuming you
mean "Error Message Haiku".
Deeply funny, those.

Basho wrote haiku
That soothed minds with images
Pretty pictures all.
"Soothing images?
Do they have pretty colors?"
Asks this psychopath.

One who likes word play
Can never be offensive
But self restraint's best.

That's some good advice.
Problem is, I'm Swedish; my
mind is corrupted

Will you marry me?
we could write haikus all day
and be intlecktschul!!

Marriage scares me Miss,
But I digress, sheeeeeit faaahr heeell....
Smart folk!?... Git' a rope!!!

(Exerpted from "Jethro's Big-Ass Book o' Whitetrash Haiku", Penguin, $19.95 or thereabouts, I reckon)

:p

Marriage scares me Miss,
But I digress, sheeeeeit faaahr heeell....
Smart folk!?... Git' a rope!!!

(Exerpted from "Jethro's Big-Ass Book o' Whitetrash Haiku", Penguin, $19.95 or thereabouts, I reckon)

:p

Makes me love you more,
that unintelligible
speech of yours. Yee-haw!

Yes, assuming you
mean "Error Message Haiku".
Deeply funny, those.

"Soothing images?
Do they have pretty colors?"
Asks this psychopath.

Sometimes they didn't
Sometimes they did but each onel
Made one reflective.

That's some good advice.
Problem is, I'm Swedish; my
mind is corruptedDarkness can do that
Maybe to clear it you must
Run with the reindeer. :D

That's some good advice.
Problem is, I'm Swedish; my
mind is corrupted

Ahhhh, Sweden..... Makes me
Think of Fjords, Blondes, and freedom.
Viking life is good!

Darkness can do that
Maybe to clear it you must
Run with the reindeer. :D

Bah! Ignorant fool!
Reindeer aren't available
in my part of town.

They're busy all year
doing errands for Santa
no time for running.

Ahhhh, Sweden..... Makes me
Think of Fjords, Blondes, and freedom.
Viking life is good!

I am blonde and free
but fjords are far more common
in Norway. Too bad.

If I were in charge
All nations would have required
Cheerleader Haiku

I stand by that statement and will politically defend it to all comers. Somehow thinking of Blonde Swedish Freedom threw my mind back this particular political sentiment :D

I stand by that statement and will politically defend it to all comers. Somehow thinking of Blonde Swedish Freedom threw my mind back this particular political sentiment :D

Operation Blonde Swedish Freedom, eh? :p

lI am blonde and free
but fjords are far more common
in Norway. Too bad.No reindeer, no fjords?
But then how do blonde Swedes have
Fun in their absence? :D

At first I was like:
"How to increase my post count?"
then I found this thread

No reindeer, no fjords?
But then how do blonde Swedes have
Fun in their absence? :D

We spend all our time
having fun with peroxide
and wrestling in mud

Must be hard in the
Winter to melt all that dirt
For entertainment.

(last 8 or so posts)

too damn funny, must
stop laughing, before i spew
coffee on keyboard

Must be hard in the
Winter to melt all that dirt
For entertainment.

Yep, we try our best
increasing the temperature
french-kissing while nude.

I get off work in
exactly half an hour
y'all will miss me, no?

Must be hard in the
Winter to melt all that dirt
For entertainment.

Melting dirt for fun
And profit depends on heat
of Blonde in question

I'm WAY off topic,
But hot Blonde Haiku is so
Tricky to resist :cool:

Yep, we try our best
increasing the temperature
french-kissing while nude.

I get off work in
exactly half an hour
y'all will miss me, no?

Scandinavia.
The more I hear, the better
Liberalism gets

Melting dirt for fun
And profit depends on heat
of Blonde in question


That made me laugh so
intensively, I think I
might pee my pants now

Hot Nude Liberals
The juncture of two good things
Politics and porn

Scandinavia.
The more I hear, the better
Liberalism gets

And wait til' you hear
about all the nice brunettes...
...haha, just kidding.

Hot Nude Liberals
The juncture of two good things
Politics and porn

I shall be known as
Hilary "Bombshell" Clinton
running for office

This is romancing
I think I am a third wheel
Best butt out for now. :p

My girlfriend will kill
Me, when she reads my postings
For she is Brunette

This is romancing
I think I am a third wheel
Best butt out for now. :p

Haven't you ever
heard of polyamory?
I like the concept. ;)

I must go now, dears
no more haikus for this blonde
at least not for now

Haven't you ever
heard of polyamory?
I like the concept. ;)

I must go now, dears
no more haikus for this blonde
at least not for now

Goodnight? o' fair Swede,
Keep on liberalizing,
And stuff. - I had fun :)

harry dresses up
like a nazi for party
he's my new hero

harry dresses up
like a nazi for party
he's my new hero

Who is this Harry?
For I Once was the "Keg Pope"
The party was fun

he is grandson of the queen of england. he goes to fancy dress parties dressed as Rommel

he is grandson of the queen of england. he goes to fancy dress parties dressed as Rommel

I'm American,
But even to me, that seems
In very poor taste

I had not heard this,
How are people in England
Responding to this?

I'm American,
But even to me, that seems
In very poor taste

I had not heard this,
How are people in England
Responding to this?

all the headlines say
harry is a nazi boy
disband monarchy

all the headlines say
harry is a nazi boy
disband monarchy

Seems a bit extreme
Is he just a drunken fool
Or a real Nazi?

He is a kidlet
Like many on this site who
Play at evilness.

They are too young yet
To realize it's bad taste
And banal to boot. :p

He is a kidlet
Like many on this site who
Play at evilness.

They are too young yet
To realize it's bad taste
And banal to boot. :p

bad taste is funny
if done in moderation.
harry is just scum

The trouble with rank
Is it insultates one from
Reality. Sad.

The trouble with rank
Is it insultates one from
Reality. Sad.

insultate should be
insulate, good point tho mate.
I republican

Not monarchist shit
want freedom for british folk
from evil royal

For some odd reason
I can hear Johnny Rotten
sing "God Save The Queen"

;)

Pepe Lepeau, French
Americans like cartoons
Strange what forms biasI ne'er understood
Why french fries became freedom
Can't friends disagree?

insultate should be
insulate, good point tho mate.
I republican

Not monarchist shit
want freedom for british folk
from evil royalToo banal for bad
But maybe the monarchy
Has outlived its time.

For some odd reason
I can hear Johnny Rotten
sing "God Save The Queen"Do you think the Queen
Will enjoy the song so much
She'll make him a knight? :p

I ne'er understood
Why french fries became freedom
Can't friends disagree?

Too banal for bad
But maybe the monarchy
Has outlived its time.

We quickly dismiss
Countries, like France, that lately
Have not been great friends

America is
Often that banal child that
Throws tantrums and cries

The upside to that
Is that we are vigorous
And ever changing

I think a king would...
Be fun, Mr. Pringle still
Gets my monarch vote ;)

Do you think the Queen
Will enjoy the song so much
She'll make him a knight? :p

"Sir Sidney Vicious"
Has a certain ring to it
Henry VIII would spin in grave

We quickly dismiss
Countries, like France, that lately
Have not been great friends

America is
Often that banal child that
Throws tantrums and cries

The upside to that
Is that we are vigorous
And ever changing

I think a king would...
Be fun, Mr. Pringle still
Gets my monarch vote ;)

no votes for monarchs
are we truly democrats?
treason or reason???

mr pringle good.
he would rule both fair and just,
a great head of state

Nazis are evil
swastikas are trendy, though
wardrobe dilemma

The search was called off
In winter for WMDs.
Credibility.

The search was called off
In winter for WMDs.
Credibility.

I think George Bush keeps
them all stashed away somewhere
the play room, perhaps.

I think George Bush keeps
them all stashed away somewhere
the play room, perhaps.

i have a garage
full of anthrax and other
white powders of death

this is not the truth
i just got addicted to
24 day three

Where did you all go?
Such fun last night with Haikus
Take the piss all day!

Conceptualists,
Heed my cry, man, save this thread
from a painful death

God shalt smite heathens
Honest he will (Bull shit mate)
Awaits Lightning bolt

Where did you all go?
Such fun last night with Haikus
Take the piss all day!

Conceptualists,
Heed my cry, man, save this thread
from a painful death

God shalt smite heathens
Honest he will (Bull shit mate)
Awaits Lightning bolt

Ahh, you bumped the thread,
Exam tommorow morning.
Political thought.

Nazis are evil
swastikas are trendy, though
wardrobe dilemma
Hammers and sickles,
They are your freinds, or may be
try the stars and stripes.

Ahh, you bumped the thread,
Exam tommorow morning.
Political thought.
My exams start soon,
Homework due tomorrow, so?
Give a shit? No way

Come on, take the piss
Out of Bush for old times sake,
Not too difficult

If not Bush then Blair,
Rumsfeld, Powell, Kerry, Brown -
Condoleeza Rice?

Hammers and sickles,
They are your freinds, or may be
try the stars and stripes.
Stars in US flag
Look like stars in Chinese Flag
Commie States of A?

Ahh, you bumped the thread,
Exam tommorow morning.
Political thought.

The last thing I need,
haikus in my head writing
about Burke and Mill

Stars in US flag
Look like stars in Chinese Flag
Commie States of A?
Hmm, the CSA,
Nice ring to it actuly,
Oh wait, damn rednecks

My exams start soon,
Homework due tomorrow, so?
Give a shit? No way

Homework don't mean shit,
But these exams need passing
To get to third year

I love this thread guys
Juxtaposition of threads
Opposing viewpoints

The last thing I need,
haikus in my head writing
about Burke and Mill
Hee hee, quote yourself,
Some say it's a sign you're sad
All I say is "Meh"

Hmm, the CSA,
Nice ring to it actuly,
Oh wait, damn rednecks
Confederate States,
Slavery, sex with siblings
Children with one eye

I love this thread guys
Juxtaposition of threads
Opposing viewpoints
What no nasty pic
Of a man with half head gone
Like in Halo thread?

Only joking, see -
You're the man who's in some wars
Is this true or not?

Only in First Gulf War
Then life of a programmer
Death is now online

I love this thread guys
Juxtaposition of threads
Opposing viewpoints

That book is ordered
"what they don't teach you at school"
Should get here next week.

Is it just me, or
Have we just moved away from
Proper thread topic? :D

Politics is bad
The government always wins
Why bother voting

Politics is bad
The government always wins
Why bother voting
Pablo the Squirrel,
(What an interesting name),
Profound insight there

Is it just me, or
Have we just moved away from
Proper thread topic? :D

But why should we stay
on topic. Rationalism
is overrated

Politics is bad
The government always wins
Why bother voting
The Haiku revolt,
Join it and we will confuse
those bastards in charge

Back on topic please
More ranting from the Left now
I miss it so much...

Back on topic please
More ranting from the Left now
I miss it so much...
George Bush is Satan
Stupid right-wing homophobes:
That enough for you? :D

Back on topic please
More ranting from the Left now
I miss it so much...
If em kay Ultra,
or what ever he is called
would learn som haikus

Left paranoia
Not conducive to haiku
Need whole brain to write

Left paranoia
Not conducive to haiku
Need whole brain to write
Right think they know best
How to write a good haiku,
Why the hell is that?

Evidence succinct;
Communists are funnier
Than Republicans

Why do you bother?
Can't fight me - I'm pacifist
Beat you up with words :D

Ah, a challenger!
Left tries to troll with haiku
Syllables bounce off!

Ah, a challenger!
Left tries to troll with haiku
Syllables bounce off!
Trolling? Me? What rot.
Infinite Superior;
Good at lying too :D

Infantrymen are
more educated than the
average person

In America
we average two years
or more of college

Fox News gives me gas
I'm right-wing, but I
hate Rupert Murdoch

Infantrymen are
more educated than the
average person

In America
we average two years
or more of college
College in UK
Is for sixteen to eighteen
What about US?

Rupert Murdoch is:
Lying biased stupid scum
Fox will turn to mulch

Democrats are same
As Republicans in their
Shoddy Policies

Maybe you should vote
Neither major party, but
Vote for 3rd party!

University
And college play the same role
Here in the US

We are in college
From nineteen to twenty-two
Study and party

Can't vote third party
The concept's not viable
At least here and now

Can't vote third party
The concept's not viable
At least here and now
Ah, well, never mind -
I'll assasinate George Bush
Donny Rumsfeld too

And, for fairness too,
I'll assasinate Clinton;
Hillary not Bill ;)

no votes for monarchs
are we truly democrats?
treason or reason???

mr pringle good.
he would rule both fair and just,
a great head of state

Salty crunchy love
Potatoe salt ambrosia
King Pringle, reign on

George Clinton for Prez,
Parliament Funkadelic
Sweet Phatte Liberty

bump this thread, oh yes
it makes me smile. and also
requires brain to post

Salty crunchy love
Potatoe salt ambrosia
King Pringle, reign on

potatoe? my friend
you remind me of some guy
a politician

he couldn't spell words
like you can't spell potato
potato is hard

I wish I could Haiku
but im not all that good
Politicians should be deated

So we can rule the world
Cause we all know everything
everyone else is wrong


^^^ was that any good its my first attempt

I wish I could Haiku
but im not all that good
Politicians should be deated
So we can rule the world

i wish you could too
it would make the thread better
i could laugh with you

i call this one - format for haiku

five syllables first
then seven syllables next
five syllables last

i wish you could too
it would make the thread better
i could laugh with you

i call this one - format for haiku

five syllables first
then seven syllables next
five syllables last

maybe we will have to settle for laughing at me

try it out, its fun
better than normal posting
(plus) makes you look cool.

it's poetry that
doesn't suffer from a lack
of rhyme or meter

I gave it a try
but I sucked oh so bad
maybe one more shot

hopefully fixed

I gave it a try
but I sucked oh so bad
maybe once more

almost there buddy
only the last line that failed
better luck next time

In Aceh province
Indonesian Army is
Clamping down on aid

In Aceh province
Indonesian Army is
Clamping down on aid

sad that for all our
good intentions humans still
suck at being nice

We open our hearts
yet nature pwns all of us
we can only live

Ignorance is bliss
Freedom, on the other hand
Is not slavery

almost there buddy
only the last line that failed
better luck next time

Really, the second
had only six syllables
we aren't all perfect

Really, the second
had only six syllables
we aren't all perfect

damn i should go back
and learn my sums again
four plus two equals???

damn i should go back
and learn my sums again
four plus two equals???

Six, as you may or not
have noticed, since your second
line is all fucked up

:p

Six, as you may or not
have noticed, since your second
line is all fucked up

:p

Look who's talking, eh?
Damn this number six, it makes
my lines all confused

Look who's talking, eh?
Damn this number six, it makes
my lines all confused

it's a tricky one
they say it hides between five
and seven a lot

*double checks syllables*

*submits post*

This thread kicks some ass
Intellectual effort
Is often required

it's a tricky one
they say it hides between five
and seven a lot

*double checks syllables*

*submits post*

The Devil's number!
Japanese poets must have
been aware of that.

Furthermore, I seem
to have a bad, bad migraine
haikus kill my head :(

Feck off with haikus
A sadder form of poetry
is yet to be found

Furthermore, I seem
to have a bad, bad migraine
haikus kill my head :(
That is very strange,
My migraine went after the
joy of haikus came

Haikus bringing joy?
I strongly think that they don't
One two three four five

Haikus bringing joy?
I strongly think that they don't
One two three four five

i find them to be
relaxing and creative
Is best thread ever

You forgot "This is"
And that is what I mean, no
logic whatever

no, i forgot 'This';
tribute to flaming carrot.
ultimate hero

I whipe my big ass
with silly stupid haikus
And I'll say: "Hell Yeah!"

Damn all you haiku
writers. I am awful at them
I tend to break form

Haiku threads are nice
Most trolls can't write a haiku
Sweet conversation

I whipe my big ass
with silly stupid haikus
And I'll say: "Hell Yeah!"

If you wiped your ass
with paper, you would create
a better haiku.

Damn all you haiku
writers. I am awful at them
I tend to break form

Don't blame the poet
For your awful poetry.
In this case: Blame God

Better? I think not
Haikus suck so hard, that my
screen just broke in two

Can you imagine
A long thread without Chess Squares
Or Dobbs Town? Can you?

Can you imagine
A thread without Eutrusca?
Or Neo Cannen?

Haiku miracle!
A political thread can exist
Without too much strife

If you wiped your ass
with paper, you would create
a better haiku.





i find an arse that
bleeds is conducive to great
haiku creation

i wipe my arse on
various sharp implements
but never haikus

Don't blame the poet
For your awful poetry.
In this case: Blame God

While we're passing bucks,
who's left for God to blame for
Chicken Pi's haiku?

Don't blame the poet
For your awful poetry.
In this case: Blame God

I curse your name, God
For you have failed to provide me
with poetic skill