NationStates Jolt Archive

Favorite quotes from anything... - Page 2

Pages : 1 [2]
08-08-2003, 14:48
"NEVAR More"
The Raven
08-08-2003, 15:00
Outside of a dog, a book is a man's best friend.
Inside a dog it's too dark too read - Groucho Marx
08-08-2003, 15:02
"I've zoomed in so far I can see Jesus!"

-me when my friend was using a camera and talking about how he could see the details of the clouds, but it was a clear day.
08-08-2003, 15:03
"Doesn't anyone ever say no to you?"

"Yeah. Sure. But it sound more like; 'NO! NO! ... PLEASE NO!'"
from Analyze this
08-08-2003, 15:07
"Up The Workers"
08-08-2003, 15:15
"It's good to be the King."
08-08-2003, 15:16
"Take good care of your friends. There will be times when
you are no good to anybody and there'll be no good reason
to like you except out of pure habit." -- Garrison Keillor
08-08-2003, 15:16
"What happens if I push this?"
08-08-2003, 15:19
"The more I study, the more I learn."
"The more I learn, the more I forget."
"So why study?"
08-08-2003, 15:21
"Thats it man...Game over! Game over!"
08-08-2003, 15:21
Blind IO

Founded: 10 May 2003
Posts: 268

Posted: Fri Aug 08, 2003 10:16 am Post subject:


"What happens if I push this?"

News Break:

At 0859 hours central standard time a mushroom cloud has appeared over the nation of "Blind IO"
08-08-2003, 15:22
"The only reason you is still alive, is cos i aint said the word."
08-08-2003, 15:24
" And Ayrton Senna has laped everyone up to first place, but as he is in first place he can't lap any one else"
Murry Walker
08-08-2003, 17:30
08-08-2003, 17:32
"Smoth as an androids bottom"
08-08-2003, 17:45
Blind IO

Founded: 10 May 2003
Posts: 268

Posted: Fri Aug 08, 2003 10:16 am Post subject:


"What happens if I push this?"

News Break:

At 0859 hours central standard time a mushroom cloud has appeared over the nation of "Blind IO"
At long last!!!
08-08-2003, 17:55
My bumper stickers:

"Shit happens, that explains you"

(burning confederate flag) "Get over it, you lost!"

The man who can smile when things go wrong has thought of someone else he can blame it on.
-Robert Bloch

Maybe I'm lucky to be going so slowly, because I may be going in the wrong direction.
-Ashleigh Brilliant

The graveyards are full of indispensable men.
-Charles de Gaulle

Man has made use of his intelligence, he invented stupidity.
-Remy De Gourmant
08-08-2003, 17:58
"Heros fall first, cowards live to old age"

Roguing Rogues
08-08-2003, 18:05
And I'm not a slave to a God that doesn't exist - marilyn manson 8)
08-08-2003, 18:06
"you better get your face on board that very next train"

08-08-2003, 18:08
Einstein "The only Certainty is the existence of God."
"Reality is merely an illusion, albeit a very persistent one." - Albert Einstein (1879-1955)
"If you want to make an apple pie from scratch, you must first create the universe." - Carl Sagan
"Friends may come and go, but enemies accumulate." - Thomas Jones
08-08-2003, 18:13
Saw this on the back of a motorcyclist's jacket:

"If you can read this, my passenger's fallen off."
08-08-2003, 18:13
"Don't go at life with a toothpick." - Dan Evans
"The only constant is change." - [i dunno who this is from, my friend just quotes it at me a lot]
"Life is worth living if living is loving." - New Aria
08-08-2003, 18:15
"Smoth as an androids bottom"

*Data shakes his head*
Roguing Rogues
08-08-2003, 18:16
Saw this on the back of a motorcyclist's jacket:

"If you can read this, my passenger's fallen off."

I've seen one like that except it said..

"If you can read this my Bitch fell off" Lol!!!
08-08-2003, 18:44
I want to die peacefully in my sleep like my Grandfather, not screaming and yelling like the passengers in his car.
08-08-2003, 18:47
"I feel sorry for people who don't drink. When they wake up in the morning, that's as good as they're going to feel all day."
-Frank Sinatra

"A man doesn't know what hapiness is until he's married. By then it's too late."
-Frank Sinatra

"Hell hath no fury like a hustler with a literary agent."
-Frank Sinatra

"Ever notice how it's a penny for your thoughts, yet you put in your two-cents? Someone is making a penny on the deal!"
-Steven Wright

"You know when you put a stick in water and it looks bent? That's why I never take baths."
-Steven Wright

"If at first you don't succeed, try, try, and try again. Then give up. There's no use being a damned fool about it."
-W.C. Fields

"A thing worth having is a thing worth cheating for. "
-W.C. Fields
08-08-2003, 19:42
~Stormtrooper hitting his head on thing-above-door in SW4
08-08-2003, 19:45

-mini me going through trash shoot
08-08-2003, 20:54
"Oh so it WASN't part of the plan to get our agent shot in the back, now that's reassuring" Triple X
10-08-2003, 00:10
"They say such nice things about people at their funerals that it makes me sad to realize that I'm going to miss mine by just a few days."
-Garrison Keillor

"Cats are intended to teach us that not everything in nature has a purpose."
-Garrison Keillor

"Beauty isn't worth thinking about; what's important is your mind. You don't want a fifty-dollar haircut on a fifty-cent head."
-Garrison Keillor

"I believe in looking reality straight in the eye and denying it."
-Garrison Keillor

"It was luxuries like air conditioning that brought down the Roman Empire. With air conditioning their windows were shut, they couldn't hear the barbarians coming."
-Garrison Keillor
10-08-2003, 01:06
"The chicken came first, but only after the egg."- Can't remember.
10-08-2003, 01:10
"Oy, I'm shakin' like a dunny door in a cyclone!"
-Steve Irwin

"Mr. Data set speed to warp 8.5..........engage!"
-Captain Jean Luke Picard
10-08-2003, 05:41
Three Rings for the Elven-kings under the sky,
Seven for the Dwarf-lords in their halls of stone,
Nine for Mortal Men doomed to die,
One for the Dark Lord on his dark throne
In the Land of Mordor where the Shadows lie.
One Ring to rule them all, One Ring to find them,
One Ring to bring them all and in the darkness bind them
In the Land of Mordor where the Shadows lie.

-The Lord of the Rings.
10-08-2003, 09:28
'Stand up men, they could'nt hit an Elephant from this dist--------'

-Some American Civil War General
that was union general sedgewick at the battle of spotsylvania, i believe.
10-08-2003, 09:43
"Life is a suicide mission."
-Orson Scott Card (Possibly from Shadow Puppets, but i forget which book exactly)

It is my national motto after all ;)
10-08-2003, 10:46
"Nullus Anxietas"-Terry Pratchett

Thats my motto.
10-08-2003, 11:30
10-08-2003, 11:36
"Ah ha, Dregruk my old nemesis..."-Sirocco
10-08-2003, 11:39

"*CRAAASH*"- Troon being thrown out a window by Dregruk, thus turning 1,000,000,000 into one of the most violent threads ever.
10-08-2003, 11:49
"*slaps [whoever] with tuna*"-various artistes.
10-08-2003, 11:50
"*slaps [whoever] with tuna*"-various artistes.

Mostly me, remember? "I am the fish MASTER!!!!"?
10-08-2003, 11:51
*draws swordfish* You wanna take this to another thread?
10-08-2003, 11:55
*Takes out two trout*


OOC: SPREAD THE WORD!! Dregruk VS Sirocco in an epic fish fight!!
10-08-2003, 12:29
"OK! FISHFIIIIGHT!!!"-famous last words :wink:
10-08-2003, 12:33
"World-class villains are defined by disproportionate revenge!" -- Senor Senior, Sr., Kim Possible episode "Animal Attractions"
10-08-2003, 13:03
It Takes A Minute To Find A Special Person, An Hour To Appreciate Them, A Day To Love Them, But An Entire Lifetime To Forget Them
11-08-2003, 01:19
"It takes a minute to find someone special, an hour to respect them, a day to love them and a lifetime to forget them"

how many of us are lucky enough to have found someone truely special?
11-08-2003, 01:27
"Go for the eye Boo, go for the ye! RUSK(?)!!!"

That's from Minsq from Baldars gate 1 8) . Nowadays we say go for the beer, but that's adult content :D. Sorry kids no alcohol 8)
11-08-2003, 01:45
" I did not have a sexual relationship with that woman." (Bill Clinton)

:lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol:
11-08-2003, 02:47
"Human beings didn't evolve brains in order to lie around on lakes. Killing is the first thing we learned. And a good thing we did, or we'd be dead, and the tigers would rule the earth."
-Orson Scott Card

"Democracy is two wolves and a lamb voting on what to have for lunch. Liberty is a well-armed lamb contesting the vote!"
-Benjamin Franklin

"We all enter this world in the same way: naked, screaming, soaked in blood. But if you live your life right, that kind of thing doesn't have to stop there."
-Dana Gould

"Peace, what a horrid concept, for we need conflict, the trials and tribulations of life, to unleash what Lincoln called the better angels of our nature, for without war and sacrifice, what are we but creatures of the herd."
-Simon Yang

"For those who believe in God, most of the big questions are answered. But for those of us who can't readily accept the God formula, the big answers don't remain stone-written. We adjust to new conditions and discoveries. We are pliable. Love need not be a command or faith a dictum. I am my own God. We are here to unlearn the teachings of the church, state, and our educational system. We are here to drink beer. We are here to kill war. We are here to laugh at the odds and live our lives so well that Death will tremble to take us."
Charles Bukowski

"Violence, naked force, has settled more issues in history than has any other factor, and the contrary opinion is wishful thinking at its worst. Nations and peoples who forget this basic truth have always paid for it with their lives and freedoms."
--Robert Heinlein
Celestial Paranoia
14-08-2003, 16:14
"Yada yada yada" - Seinfeld
14-08-2003, 16:21
Drink up me hearties, yo ho!
Celestial Paranoia
14-08-2003, 18:37
"Lord knows I'm weak.
Won't somebody get get me off this reef?" - Sublime
14-08-2003, 18:54
My favorite quote is by Arabic poet Kahlil Gibran...

"Yesterday we obeyed kings and bent our necks before emperors. But today we kneel only to truth, follow only beauty, and obey only love."
- Kahlil Gibran 8)

14-08-2003, 19:00
"Winners never quit, and quiters never win, but those who dont win and dont quit are jsut stupid."

8) SUCH TRUTH ....
14-08-2003, 19:07
"And the dish ran away with the spoon. But Hawaii was the only state that would recognize the marriage as legal." - Jane(daria)

you were about five feet short of a ten feet jump?"
"I feel like my eyes have gonorreah!!!"
(Johnny Knoxville)
"Right now we´r gonna hurt the treadmill, or the treadmill is gonna hurt us"
(Bam Margera)

"We're gonna go down these hills in these carts and get's ghetto carts, baby!"
{in a pirate accent} "he hath entered my kingdom like he hath entered my ass"
(Brandon Dicamilo)

"When he's asleep, i wish he was awake, and when he is awake, i wished that he is asleep"
"Russian police. Stern, stern but fair"
"My job on this show is to be naked, not to kill myself."
(Chris Pontius)

"I think we're gonna find out very soon that the only place worse than England is France."
"I'm sick of this pooping stuff! I'm gonna get my buttcheeks pierced together!"

"I got tarred and feathered. I thought this only went on in Bugs Bunny cartoons"
"He broke his tailbone...that's alright, we don't have tails anymore, what's the purpose?"
(Ryan Dunn)

"You should get a glass stomach, that way you won't have to worry about pulling your head out of your ass."
(Dave England)

don't dream ur life, live ur dream
make new friends but keep the old, for one is silver the other gold

never again will i close my eyes and walk in the dark backwards blind......ja rule

loving u is like a battle and we both end up with scars

love is what the stupidest person can feel but the most intelligent can't describe

an eye for an eye....leads only to more blindness

these next ones r all quotes from famous americans but i couldn't be arsed to go look for the name....

i haven't commited a crime....what i did was to fail to comply with the law...

smoking kills. if ure killed, u've lost a very important part of ur life

i don't feel we did wrong in taking this great country away from them. there were great numbers of ppl who needed new land and the indians were selfishly trying to keep it for themselves.....john wayne

we don't neccessarily discriminate, we simply exclude certain types of ppl

i was recently on a tour of latin america and the only regret i have is that i didn't study my latin harder in school so i could converse with those ppl.....don quayle

If I'm not back in five minutes... Just wait longer."

"The guy with the rubber gloves was surprisingly gentle."

"AAAA! It's in the bone! Quick, throw me a spear!"
--fling-- ... ::snkik::..
"Gyah! ARGH!"

"Surely you can't be serious!"
"I am serious. And don't call me Shirley."

"Doctor, can you give the court your impression of Mr. Striker?"
"I'm sorry, I don't do impressions. My training is in Psychiatry."

"Combination hooka and coffee maker! Will not break! Will not- it broke.."

"That's, uh, quite a dress you almost have on."

"Get OFF...the nuclear...warhead."

"Good...Bad...I'm the guy with the gun."

"Why won't you die?!"

*- B
"You wouldn't hit a guy with glasses, would you?"

"Why are all the gorgeous ones homicidal maniacs? Is it me?"

"Has anyone ever told you you have a SERIOUS impulse control problem?!"

"Holy rusted metal, Batman!"
"The island.. it's made out of rusted metal.. and holey.. you know.."

"You may be a king, or a little street sweeper,
But sooner or later, you dance with the reaper."

"Strange things are afoot at the Circle K."

"Where you headed, cowboy?"
"Nowhere special."
"Nowhere special... I always wanted to go there.."

"What's your name?"
"Well, my name is Jim. But most people call me... Jim."
Roguing Rogues
14-08-2003, 19:18
"I wasn't born with enough middle fingers!" - Marilyn Manson :twisted:
14-08-2003, 19:25
"You see I cannot be forsaken
Because i'm not the only one
We walk amongst you
Feeding, Reaping
Must we hide from everyone?"

Forsaken- Queen of the Damned soundtrack
14-08-2003, 19:28
A wise Elbonian once said:

"In a race between a rock and a pig, don't varnish your clams."

[Dilbert by Scott Adams]
British Commonwealth
14-08-2003, 21:12
History teaches you that dictators never end up well
-General Pinochet

I do not have to forgive my enemies I have had them all shot
-Roman Maria Narvez

peace-in international affairs a period of cheating between two periods of fighting
-Devils dictionary

The beatings will conyinue until morale improves
-unknown Jpanese Admiral
15-08-2003, 00:37
Egotism : usually just a case of mistaken non-entity
barbara stanwyck

If you think you are too small to be effective you've never been in bed with a mosquito.
Anita Roddick
15-08-2003, 06:34
"In politics, if you want anything said, ask a man;
if you want anything done, ask a woman."
--- Margaret Thatcher

"Corporations have been enthroned ... An era of
corruption in high places will follow and the money power will endeavor to prolong its reign by working on the prejudices of the people ... until wealth is aggregated in a few hands ... and the Republic is destroyed." - Abraham Lincoln, 1865

The bravest thing you can do when you are not brave is to profess courage and act accordingly.
Corra Harris
15-08-2003, 06:47
life is Gods gift to you. what you do with it is your gift to Him.
15-08-2003, 06:55
oh and on a lighter note :)

i used to do a little but a little wouldnt do,
so a little got more and more.
i just keep trying to get a little better,
said a little better than before.

mr brownstone gnr


halls of justice painted green
money talking
power wolves beset your door
hear them stalking
soon you'll please their appetite
they devour
hammer of justice crushes you

justice for all metallica

these two cd's had some of the most tremendous influence on me when younger.
15-08-2003, 07:55
"Put that bloody cigarette out."
-Last words of English author HH Munro to a fellow soldier, before being shot by a German sniper in WWI.
15-08-2003, 08:13
Your mother was a hamster and you father smelt of elderberries!!!-French guard, Monty Python

I unclog my my nose towards you, sons of a window dresser!... I wave my private parts at you aunties, you brightly coloured, mealy-templed, cranberry-smelling, electrice donkey bottom biter! -The back of my shirt, a misquote from Monty Python.

And a more serious nite:
Cogito ergo sum- Rene Descartes (I think, therefore I exist)
Dulce et decorum est pro est pro patria mori-Horace (It's sweet and glorious to die for one's fatherland [country])
Deus vocatus atque invocatus aderit -Carl Jung (God, whether summoned or not, will be there)

And last, but not least:
Homo sapiens non in ventum urinat (A wise man does not urinate in the wind) -written on the rear entrance of a casino in central Amsterdam.
15-08-2003, 08:21
"We're more popular than cheeses."
- Buddy, "Soul Music"
(Only occurs in movie version)

"We're on a mission from Glod."
- Buddy(?), "Soul Music"
(Only occurs in the print version - possibly only the American one).
15-08-2003, 16:23
"An Ology!!! everyone needs an ology"
Maureen Lipman BT ad
21-08-2003, 05:30
"This is the lorry it all falls off"
Seen on the back of a Lorry.......
21-08-2003, 05:50
Just remember as you sit your bloated msg-riddled carcass in front of the idiot-box to watch "the bachelor" that your grandfather may have been nice, may even have taken part in liberating europe, but you're still an idiot.
27-09-2003, 21:00
"MINE! MINE AHEAD!..........Oh It's OK Fellas...It's one of ours"

Mad Dan Eccles
27-09-2003, 21:07
"My domestic policy? F*ck you. My foreign policy? F**************CK YOU!"

- Denis Leary, "Lock 'n Load"

"'I'm just not happy because my life didn't turn out the way I thought it would' - hey, I thought I was gonna be the starting center fielder for the Boston Red Sox, life sucks, get a f*ckin' helmet!"

Denis Leary, "No Cure For Cancer"

"Let's go kill people."

- Major Frank Skazy, "The Day Before Midnight"
27-09-2003, 21:10
"At times one remains faithful to a cause only because its opponents do not cease to be insipid." --Friedrich Nietzsche (1844 - 1900)


"People demand freedom of speech to make up for the freedom of thought which they avoid." -- Soren Aabye Kierkegaard (1813-1855)

27-09-2003, 21:43
I would rather have a mind opened by wonder than one closed by belief. - Gerry Spence

The West won the world not by the superiority of its ideas or values or religion but rather by its superiority in applying organized violence. Westerners often forget this fact, non-Westerners never do.

-Samuel P. Huntington

If he is infinitely good, what reason should we have to fear him? If he is infinitely wise, why should we have doubts concerning our future? If he knows all, why warn him of our needs and fatigue him with our prayers? If he is everywhere, why erect temples to him? If he is just, why fear that he will punish the creatures that he has filled with weaknesses? If grace does everything for them, what reason would he have for recompensing them? If he is all-powerful, how offend him, how resist him? If he is reasonable, how can he be angry at the blind, to whom he has given the liberty of being unreasonable? If he is immovable, by what right do we pretend to make him change his decrees? If he is inconceivable, why occupy ourselves with him? IF HE HAS SPOKEN, WHY IS THE UNIVERSE NOT CONVINCED? If the knowledge of a God is the most necessary, why is it not the most evident and the clearest?
-- Percy Bysshe Shelley, The Necessity of Atheism
30-09-2003, 15:33
"The mobile phone will never be more than a passing fad, Trust me."
30-09-2003, 16:04
30-09-2003, 17:34
"Look to your left
Now look to your right
Odds are one of these people will be working for me in ten years."

My high school valedictorian during his graduation speech.
30-09-2003, 17:56
"where is the nearest John"
Nick Tate as Alan Carter
Space 1999
The Bringers of Wonder
30-09-2003, 18:15
Elwood: It's 106 miles to Chicago, we've got a full tank of gas, a half a pack of cigarattes, it's dark and we're wearing sunglasses.
Jake: Hit it.

- The Blues Brothers
30-09-2003, 18:22
There is no reason anyone would want a computer in their home.
-Ken Olson, president, chairman and founder of Digital Equipment Corp., 1977

Who controls the past controls the future. Who controls the present controls the past.
-George Orwell

No poor bastard ever won a war by dying for his country. He won it by making other bastards die for their country.
-General George S. Patton

Education is a method whereby one acquires a higher grade of prejudices.
-Laurence J. Peter
30-09-2003, 18:30
"Here we are, we're on Crete."
"Egads, it's hard!'
"Then we must be on con-Crete!"
-Seagoon and Bloodnok, The Goon Show

"We need bigger guns! We need big, fucking guns!"
-Split Second wiv Rutger Hauer
01-10-2003, 10:38
Eccles "Right. Hold this"
Blubottle "What is it?"
Eccles "I don't know, but I got it cheap."
Seagoon "Let me see what you got cheap?"
Seagoon "Good Heavens it's a genuine hand operated 1914 tiger!"
04-11-2003, 11:59
ned" How long have you been there?"
Mate "Oh , about five minutes. I was deliverin the groceries."
Ned "you a greengrocer?"
"Not quite green, more of a dirty yellow colour- ha ha ha"
Ned "Very good, now just step out of this thieteenth storey window."
Mate "No thanks, I'm trying to give 'em up."
Ned " I wish I could.....hup!"
04-11-2003, 12:21
"Life has no other discipline to impose, if we would but realize it, than to accept life unquestioningly. Everything we shut our eyes to, everything we run away from, everything we deny, denigrate or despise, serves to defeat us in the end. What seems nasty, painful, evil, can become a source of beauty, joy and strength, if faced with an open mind. Every moment is a golden one for him who has the vision to recognize it as such."

Henry Miller
04-11-2003, 12:30
---Post deleted by NationStates Moderators---
04-11-2003, 12:36
someone said 2 that british primeminister winston churchill, "If i were your wife i wud slip poison in your tea", to which he replied, "if i were ur husband, id drink it".
04-11-2003, 12:39
---Post deleted by NationStates Moderators---
Norse Lands
04-11-2003, 12:59
My lord, the Swiss have invaded France.

Excellent, while they're away, take 10,000 troops and pillage Geneva

But my lord, the Swiss are our allies.

Oh yes, well get them to dress up a Germans.

As the good lord once said, love thy neighbour as thy self, unless he's Turkish, in which case, kill the bastard.

I'm beginning to see why the suffragette movement want the vote

Hey, any girl who wants to chain herself to my railings and suffer a jet movement gets my vote.

All from Blackadder.
04-11-2003, 15:47
Ned Seagoon" Have you got boots on?"
Mad Dan Eccles" Yup, i got boots on!"
Ned Seagoon "Well, Stop that car"
The Unreal Soldiers
04-11-2003, 15:55
The Chief of IBM said there would only ever be a need of 5 computers or less in the world(this was around the 50's).
04-11-2003, 15:57
"Concord is the future of air travel"
Micheal Hesaltine
28-11-2003, 01:46
just a few quotes on a lighter note

in The Goon Show
the lads are in the desert, they find a house and explore it .
At the moment they realise it's a mirage
Eccles : Arrrrrrrrrrhhh ( Sound of someone falling )
Other : Whats the matter Eccles?
Eccles : I was Upstairs.
- not a direct quote but the gist of it is the same.

On being found in a wardrobe and after being asked what he was doing there.
Spike Miligan ; Everybody's got to be somewhere.

And finally dear Spikes Epitaph

I told you I was ill.
The Nest
28-11-2003, 13:37
"I've been trying to see things from your point of view, but i cant get my head that far up my arse" - My friend Smudge to an irritating person in a pub.
Bokononist San Lorenzo
28-11-2003, 13:45
When the main character in office space tells Jennifer Aniston's character:
"Y'know, the Nazis had pieces of flare that they made the Jews wear"
Cornflake Gremlins
28-11-2003, 14:56
"You don't frighten us, English pig-dogs! -- Go and boil your bottoms, sons of a silly person. I blow my nose at you, so-called Arthur-king, you and all your silly English knnnniggets. Thppppt!. . . I don't want to talk to you no more, you empty headed animal food trough wiper! I fart in your general direction! Your mother was a hamster and your father smelt of elderberries!"


Monty Python. Pure genius.
28-11-2003, 15:28
"Laugh it up, fuzzball" ~ Hans Solo...obviously :P
05-12-2003, 00:34
They told me I was gulible and I believed them.

Am I ignorant or just appatetic? To tell you the truth I don't know and I really don't care.

There are three typre of people in the world; those who can count and those who can't
05-12-2003, 01:07
There are 10 types of people in the world those that understand the binary system and those that don't!


US navy officer when asked if had has sympathy for japenese kamikazee pilots

"sympathy: I'll tell you about sympathy. You'll find it in the dictionary between shit and syphillis"
Ocean Shores
05-12-2003, 01:19
"I never believed in Santa Claus because I knew no white dude would come into my neighborhood after dark." -Dick Gregory

"I have just enough white in me to make my honesty questionable." -Will Rogers

"I didn't know he was dead; I thought he was British." -Unknown

"I am a deeply superficial person." -Andy Warhol

"I can't die until the government finds a safe place to bury my liver." -Phil Harris

"A man in love is incomplete until he is married. Then he is finished." -Zsa Zsa Gabor

"I shot an arrow into the air and it stuck." -Graffito in Los Angeles

"There is something about a closet that makes a skeleton restless." -Unknown

"Gaiety is the most outstanding feature of the Soviet Union." -Joseph Stalin
Henleaze Avenue
05-12-2003, 01:26
"I have no legs...I have no legs..." - Legless man from some movie...
05-12-2003, 02:12
Hi I'm new, anyway here are a couple quotes, though someone may have said them already, i didn't read through the whole thread

"Most of our foreign imports come from other countries"
-George W. Bush

"I'm proud to be here in the breadbasket of America"
-George W. Bush, during a speech in California

"I have no intention of reading it"
-George W. Bush, refering to an education bill he had just signed
05-12-2003, 02:15
*is too lazy to see if this was already used*

"They couldn't hit an elephant from this dist..."

-General Williams (?) shot dead by a Union sniper in the US Civil War.
05-12-2003, 02:16
how about this?



05-12-2003, 21:46
looks like peaple are baffold about that post by viduekzuj?
05-12-2003, 22:04
ok hahhaha! :wink: go suck on a pigs ass.
05-12-2003, 22:24
peasent:THERE IT IS! (in wispered voice)

King of the britians:where?

Pesent THERE!

Britian:what behind the rabbit?

peasent:it IS the rabbit!

Britian:YOU SILLY SOD! you got us all worked up!

peasent:that's no ordinary rabbit! that's the most foul Cruel roadant you'v ever set eyes on!

britian:no Kept! i soiled my armor i was so scared

Peasent:look that thing has teeth a mile wide it's a killer!

Britian:get stuffed!

Peasent:it'll do YOU a treat mate!

britian: oh yeah? make it so!

Peasent:he has Sharp Teeth, he can leap about....LOOK AT THE BONES!

Britian:guard go chop it's head off

Soldier:right! silly little bidder. 1 rabbit stew comming RIGHT UP!



peasent:i warned you!

Britian:i did it again!

peasent:i warned you but did you listen to me OOOHHH NO! it's just a harmless little BUNNEY!well it's always the Same! nobody listens!

Britian:O SHUT UP! right men! CHARGE!

fighting agianst lossing...


Peasent starts to laugh

britian cant defeat a rabbit! hahahhaha thats a good one.
07-12-2003, 21:16
someone stole my quote!
By the way the film is called Kids
George W. Bush
"I am all for a stronger death penalty"
07-12-2003, 21:26
someone stole my quote!
By the way the film is called Kids
George W. Bush
"I am all for a stronger death penalty"
"Rarely is the question asked 'Is our children learning?'" Bush...)
I cannot corrupt that which is by nature already corrupt
The Unreal Soldiers
07-12-2003, 22:03
"Yippi kay ay mother-fker" John McClane in Die Hard
21-12-2003, 16:44
just a few quotes on a lighter note

in The Goon Show
the lads are in the desert, they find a house and explore it .
At the moment they realise it's a mirage
Eccles : Arrrrrrrrrrhhh ( Sound of someone falling )
Other : Whats the matter Eccles?
Eccles : I was Upstairs.
- not a direct quote but the gist of it is the same.

On being found in a wardrobe and after being asked what he was doing there.
Spike Miligan ; Everybody's got to be somewhere.

And finally dear Spikes Epitaph

I told you I was ill.

Had to laugh...Spike will always be with us, but as was said on the Q Series
"What are we gonna do now?"
21-12-2003, 17:57
---Post deleted by NationStates Moderators---
21-02-2004, 15:34
"we know they have WMD" all of the British and US Government
21-02-2004, 15:51
"The 'holy scriptures' of the Abrahamic faiths describe a sick, twisted, jealous, vengeful, unjust, punishing, tyrannical, fascistic, mass murdering, insecure megalomaniac of a god. This god is a truly despicable character who inspires truly despicable behavior." Alfred Karius

"Deep down in his heart no man much respects himself." -- Mark Twain

"I am always with myself, and it is I who am my tormentor." -- Leo Tolstoy

"Racism isn't born, folks. It's taught. I have a 2 - year old son. You know
what he hates? Naps! End of list." -- Denis Leary

"Fear always spring from ignorance." -- Ralph Waldo Emerson
Zyzyx Road
21-02-2004, 15:56
"AHHH My Eyes!! The goggles do nothing!!"
-Rainier Wolfcastle
21-02-2004, 16:07
I like this dialogue:

Woman 1: Kissing is as important as any part of it.

Man 1: Yeah right!

Man 2: You serouis?

Woman 2: Oh yeah, everything you need to know is in that 1st kiss

Man 3: Yeah i think for us, kissing is pretty much an opening act, y'know, its like the stand up comedian you have to sit though before... pink floyd comes out.

Man 1: And its not like we don't like the comedian, its just that thats not, why we bought the ticket...

Man 3: You see the problems is though after the concerts over, no matter how great the show was, you girls are always, looking for the comedian again, y'know i mean we're in the car, we're fighting traffic, basically just trying to stay awake.

Woman 2: Yeah well, a word of advice, bring back the comedian otherwise next time you're gona find yourself listening to that tape alone

Man 1: Are we still talking about sex?
Giant Zucchini
23-02-2004, 07:21
My ex-English teacher said this classic:

"'Devastated' (Dee-var-stated) is the opposite of 'Vastated'. Therefore, 'Devastated' means 'destroyed'."
After which the sentence in the passage read, "The fishermen were 'destroyed' after hearing the news..."

Other clangers:

"Mars -- sometimes called ''The Red Planet,'' because it appears, to the naked eye, to be orange -- gets its name from the ancient Greek or Roman name ''Mars,'' meaning ''Mars''."
- Dave Barry

"The question is, could this money be better spent? We have many urgent needs right here on Earth. What about the elderly? What about the young people? Could we maybe kill two birds with one stone here and send the elderly and young people to Mars? Will the young people want special ''low-rider'' astronaut pants with the waist at roughly knee level?"
- Dave Barry, still on the topic of Mars

"TODAY'S WRITING TIP FOR JOB-SEEKERS: When writing a résumé, be sure to use ''power words'' to describe your accomplishments and skills:

WRONG: ''I supervised a team of 15 data-entry clerks.''

RIGHT: ''I can snap your spine like a toothpick.''"
- Dave Barry
23-02-2004, 07:49
I did have an edifying quote, but no one can follow Dave Barry.
Th Great Otaku
23-02-2004, 13:02
Here are a few:

"Goodbye everyone, I'll remember you all in therepy."--Plankton from Spongebob

"There once was a tiger-stripped cat. This cat died a million deaths, was revived, and lived a million lives and was owned by many different people he didn't really care for. This cat wasn't afraid to die. Then, one day this cat became a stray cat, which meant it was free and he met a white, female cat and the two of them spent their days together happily. Well, years past and the white cat grew weak and died of old age. The tiger stripped cat cried a million times, then he died too, except this time, he didn't come back to life."--Spike from Cowboy Bebop

"Stupidity is only cured by death"--Faye from Cowboy Bebop

"Not coming for Ed, ooh la la..."--Ed from Cowboy Bebop
23-02-2004, 21:04
From Bill and Ted's Excellent Adventure

Nobles: "Take them to the Iron Maiden"
Bill and Ted: *Jamming on Air Guitars* "Iron Maiden? WHOA!!"
Princess: "No, that means they're going to kill you!"
The fairy tinkerbelly
23-02-2004, 21:31
I've learned that all a person has in life is family and friends. If you lose those, you have nothing, so friends are to be treasured more than anything else in the world.
Trey Parker and Matt Stone, South Park, Prehistoric Ice Man, 1999

(and btw, quote is a verb not a noun, the noun you want is quotations)
The fairy tinkerbelly
23-02-2004, 21:32
The fairy tinkerbelly
23-02-2004, 21:32
I've learned that all a person has in life is family and friends. If you lose those, you have nothing, so friends are to be treasured more than anything else in the world.
Trey Parker and Matt Stone, South Park, Prehistoric Ice Man, 1999

(and btw, quote is a verb not a noun, the noun you want is quotations)
29-02-2004, 19:05
Happiness never decreases by being shared

The really great man is the one who makes every other man feel great
Kaze Progressa
01-03-2004, 22:44
[21:35:44] * Cockbill_Street shoots the forums. Hard. With special caviar
[21:36:08] * KP swears they are imaginary forums
[21:36:19] <Cockbill_Street> lol!
[21:36:39] * CH|away has joined #sport
[21:36:45] <Cockbill_Street> maybe the numbers on the server interchange between 0, i, and 1
[21:36:48] <KP> hahahaha
[21:36:53] <KP> i is when they don't work?
[21:36:58] <Cockbill_Street> yup

[11:29:46] <Cockbill_Street> Step 1: Bend over. Step 2: Place head between legs. Step 3: Kiss you sorry ass goodbye. Step 4: Repeat until the weather service indicates the ambient temperature for you major cities to be 10 million degrees Kelvin.

[20:44:56] <Oglethorpia> "Mike White gets devoured by ravenous wolves"
[20:45:13] <Oglethorpia> That'd be cool stuff. And his Alan Belmore co-host falls from a 14th balcony sky box
[20:45:33] <Oglethorpia> (Don't worry. There's 1,699,999 more of them.)
[20:45:42] <KP> hahahaha LOL Ogle!
[20:45:44] <Oglethorpia> Wait. 106,999,999 more of them.
02-04-2004, 10:00
Tucker RvB: Dude women are like voltron, the more you hook up the better it gets.
Greater Valia
02-04-2004, 10:01
i got one from my favorite book, american gods.
"you want to see lucy's tits?" :D