NationStates Jolt Archive

Okay I'm not sure if this is good for here or maybe an RP forum, so go ahead and fix it if this is wrong.

Okay here's here's the deal. You enter your national animal into the contest. Give a bunch of stats on your animal, and tell why it's more vicious then every other animal. Now I'll check up on your animal and make sure you're not fudging the numbers, so you won't be able to cheat and say your animal is equipped with fifty million billion nucleofusion warheads. But then, when I get enough entries(16 or 8), I'll use a randomizing force to create a tournament tree. Then I'll compare the animals and stats given, and decide a winner. The winner of the competition gets something good. I won't enter my animal because it would win for sure. But here's a sample of the entrance form.

Name: Armored Velociraptor
Average lifespan: 77 years
Comparable shape: Velociraptor
IQ: 96
Killing Tools: Claws, Tail scythe, sharp teeth, Strong legs and Strong Tail.

And include a picture if you want. Thanks.

Name: Pirahna
Vicious: Swims in large groups and eats large animals.
Has: Little intelligence, but a lot of very sharp teeth.
What locals call it: Damn, that's a mean fish.

Name: Pirahna
Vicious: Swims in large groups and eats large animals.
Has: Little intelligence, but a lot of very sharp teeth.
What locals call it: Damn, that's a mean fish.

Okay, this is our first entrant! I'm guessing this is just your standard amazonian pirahna. It will be tough to beat. Oooh, I wonder what would happen in a contest between this and some kind of predator bird....

Keep entering people!

animal: a-bomb
Pokemon power: self-destruct (kills itself but in the process kills everything else)

Name: Ryuu
Average lifespan: unknown
Comparable shape: Dragon
Intellegance: very high
Other facts: This creature inspires fear into all who see it, enjoys hording large sums of money, a very muscular body, very sharp claws, teeth that could tear steel to shreds, a tail that could send a human flying great distances, the ability to fly, a very short temper, and is covered in very strong scales.

animal: a-bomb
Pokemon power: self-destruct (kills itself but in the process kills everything else)

I'll let you play, but be warned, the guy who plays you will have what could be considered a "first round bye"

Name: Ryuu
Average lifespan: unknown
Comparable shape: Dragon
Intellegance: very high
Other facts: This creature inspires fear into all who see it, enjoys hording large sums of money, a very muscular body, very sharp claws, teeth that could tear steel to shreds, a tail that could send a human flying great distances, the ability to fly, a very short temper, and is covered in very strong scales.

Oh, that will be tough to beat. You could probably beat Pirahna, barring some clutch teamwork. Let's see how the other entries go down. Right now there's three.

Well, since my animal only has one attack, and after that it's done, i cant win

My animal is the laughing hyena. It is the second largest predator in Africa, right behind their mortal enemy, the lion. It lives for up to twenty years in the wild, has the strongest jaws of any predatory mammal in the world; their jaws can easily crush bone. They can run at a fast clip for hours on end. Far from the craven scavengers that they are portrayed as, the laughing hyena is actually a vicious predator that can chase lions from their kill and take down far larger creatures. They are a highly intelligent creature who's whooping laugh is considered one of the most bloodcurdling noises in all of nature.

Name: Elephantman
Average Lifespan: 85-123 years
Comparable Shape: Think of a 25 foot man/elephant that weighs about 5000 lbs. and you've got the basic idea.
IQ: 124
Killing Tools: Wit, Strength, and really really sharp tusks

Name: Raven
Average lifespan: 8 years
IQ: 150
Other notes: Don't argue about it's inteligence, it's wearing a monicle and a top hat, therefore it is smart. Oh, can claw and peck out the eyes of other animals.

Name:The Homeless madman
Average Lifespan:Varies depending on drug dependacy and police brutality level
Comparable to:The guys you always see under the overpass
IQ:Varies(from 47 to 387)
Other facts:These creature's natural habitat is mostly near the dense urban centers, where they live under overpasses, under foot bridges, and on sidewalks. They feed on the sympathy of passers by, who provide them with the spare change necessary to feed themselves. They sometimes have addictions to drugs such as alchohol, cocaine, and other hallucenogens. They are sometimes extremly insightfull, sometimes completly incoherent and indiscriminatly violent.

Killing tools and such: These creatures have a wide array of defensice mechanisms. They are skilled in the art of fistycuffs, but are also masters of the "flail in a drunken stupper" fighting style, which is much more effective than it sounds. The also have been know to use tools when engaged in combat, among them broken bottles with which to stab their aggressor, or shred in their face once subdued. Many of them have pieces of pipe, hammers, pieces of industrial chain, and some even knives. A Homeless madman may seem docile, larthargic and non-violent, but when aroused or angered, they are a force to be feared.


Hope that was ok.

my state-legendary geniuses,my animal is the trouser snake
comes in different colors and sizes,can be found almost everywhere.

Name: Cheshire cat
Average lifespan: About 25 years, so far as we can tell.
Size, type: A cat. Size ranging from the normal housecat to the size of a bobcat.
Intelligence: Higher than we thought.
Other facts: While Cheshires may not have much strength, they are very skilled at talking their enemies to death, and spreading mass confusion. Cheshires also have the ability to make themselves vanish at will. Cheshires, however, are constantly mauling things in order to maintain their constantly-growing claws. Once the mauling begins, it is never safe to assume the Cheshire will stop. Their bite may or may not be deadly; there have been instances of rabies in Cheshire society.

THAT'S ENOUGH! No more. Maybe the next one we do can have sixteen people, but I don't think we're doing to be able to get another eight to participate. And sorry, Military Force, you can't play.

k

OKAY! Here's the tournment tree:

Homeless Madman
Ryuu


Cheshire Cat
Trouser Snake


Elephantman
Raven


Laughing Hyena
Pirahna

I'll choose who wins, and then it'll go to the next round.

k

k

Aww I would have joined. But my national animal is extinct.

Aww I would have joined. But my national animal is extinct.

Hey, listen up. I'm probably gonna' make another tournament after this one, and I think I'll be able to put sixteen people on it. So stay tuned.

The first match is between Ryuu and Homeless Madman!

IC: Hello everyone I'm the ring announcer. I will commentate the match to you all. Ryuu is a large dragon, against Homeless Madman, a very drugged up hobo. It's a shame this match has come in the first round, as whoever wins this will probably have experienced the toughest match of the tourney. However predictions of the tournament's future will have to wait! Ryuu v. Homeless Madman begins now!

Ryuu, usually an intimidating creature, appears to have no psychological effect on Homeless Madman, likely because the drugs have given him the mindset of "fear none but cops." The Homeless Madman, who ring officials have named "Joe" appears to have brought a bottle of Jack Daniels into the ring. Ryuu, comes out and flies high up in the air, and loops at the top of his climb OH HE'S COMING DOWN NOSE FIRST INTO **SSSCCCHHHWWWAAAAM!!!** OH, AND JOE POPS HIS BOTTLE AND BREAKS IT OVER RYUU'S NOSE, OUCH! Ryuu is down, and Joe is charging, flailing into him. OH a swat from Ryuu sends Joe out into the wall. Joe is hanging from the rafters BUT NOW RYUU HAS BEGUN TO BLEED! It seems that Joe has flung a knife into Ryuu's strong scaly hide! Amazing. But it looks like it's over folks, Ryuu, although maimed as he is, has flown up to Joe and bit his head off. Wow, that's messy. An amazing fight put up by Joe, hopefully we can have him back next time. I think if he was fighting anyone but a mythical dragon, he would have cleaned up.

But the official winner is: RYUU

Ryuu was severely injured across the snout and a knife wound in his body. He may not fare well against his next opponent, either the Cheshire Cat or the Trouser Snake. It would be very interesting to see a match between Ryuu and Elephantman. I will continue to do the matches, until the entire tree has been defeated except for the champion.

ELIMINATED: HOMELESS MADMAN(though he put up a very good fight, and we're sorry to see him go, and wish him to return next event)

Dude great fight!

oh, such tragedy! Joe, we hardly knew yee!*sniffle*

Crap! I wish i could enter...

A Sehra Loog would ONWN!

lets not enter cheap all things though. not be fair. all fair.

lets not enter cheap all things though. not be fair. all fair.

Sehra loogs are fair!

but who is the guy who did that? Disease? What do you mean?

I'm tired. Goodnight.

Aww,Cant The Cow From Magical Trevor Join? (Pic as my Flag)

Magical Trevor-From www.Weebls-Stuff.com/toons :D

Let me enter the next battle, I'm sure to win.....


"Tyrador's national animal is the grunt, which teeters on the brink of extinction due to widespread deforestation"
Name: grunt
Average lifespan: 80 years
Comparable shape: Human Bodybuilder
IQ: 150-180
Weapons: M-4 Assault Rifle, M1911 Pistol, Knife, Fists

http://www4.army.mil/USAR/news/yip2003/images/09_29_03.jpg
"A mother grunt Looks on as its children play"

guys, no more he said, no more!

Your cluttering the thread with annoyance and stupidity.

( I mean that in the nicest way possible)

Our national animal is the Thunder Eagle.
Over 25 feet between the wing tips!! Standing on the ground the height is over 7 feet!! The largest ever measured was 32 feet between the wingtips and stood 8.5 feet tall!!! The color is brown, white, black with blue speckle.
Not a bird that you have as a “pet”, but it’s the most majestic bird you ever seen.

No More, He Said No More.

IC: hello I'm the ring announcer, and the next battle is between the trouser snake and the Cheshire Cat! The Cat is the heavy favorite, as it is well known that cats love to eat trouser snakes. The trouser snake lunges out for the cat, but the cat has...turned invisible? This will be very difficult to commentate! The snake has been thrown into the air-oh there he is, he's got his mouth open-the snake is coming down now and falls straight into the Cheshire Cat's mouth! The Cat is reaching into his mouth now...and pulling the snake out! Now he's beginning to maul the snake...oh boy, we might be here awhile. The match has been called in favor of the Cat! He will continue on virtually unscathed to face a maimed Ryuu. It'll be a good one. Invisibility vs. Flight! I can't wait! But next will be Raven vs. The Elephantman! Wisdom vs. Strength! I can't wait! Be there, or be not there.

Huzzah!

Remember, no more animals for the love of fucking god.

This was truly a great idea my man, I have lots of fun.

IC: Hello, I'm the ring announcer, about to announce the fight that will now commence between the Elephantman and the Raven. But first, studied Maniacan Animalologist, Joe Animal. Joe, the Elephantman with his looming size and incredible brain is obviously the heavy favorite, although it is quite reasonable for the raven to fly and dodge every attack the elephantman throws. But that won't win the raven the match. So my question to you is, how can the raven actually defeat the elephantman?

"Well Ring, I think the only way the raven can defeat elephantman is for him to make the elephantman defeat himself. Make him, with his massive girth, fall over on himself, repeatedly. This can be acheived by flying through his legs, making him step awkwardly, or making him dizzy. If he can keep that up without being plastered over a wall, he can actually win this match."

Thanks for the analysis, Joe. Now let's go ringside for the match. The raven, as predicted, has flown high up into the air. Here he comes, trying to dive bomb the elephantman. BOOM, the raven hits the elephant man in the face with his beak. The elephantman seems to be woozy, isn't really digesting the raven's flight pattern. Stepping strangely, oh no, OH NO! The elephantman has fallen backwards after trying to step on the raven with both feet. This, as Joe said, was just what the raven wanted to do! But wait...where's the raven? I can't seem to find him anywhere! Is he hiding? Oh no...oh, this is terrible. As the elephant man gets up, you can see the raven flattened on his back. Apparently the elephantman fell backwards on top of the raven, flattening him. So a quick end to a promising fight. The elephantman, though dizzy, is not dead, so he is declared the victor.

The winner: ELEPHANTMAN

Eliminated: RAVEN

Elephantman will continue to face the winner of the match between Pirahna and Laughing Hyena. I for one will wait with baited breath for the end of the first round.

Yeah! The Camel Eaters crowd breaks out in joy.

Huzzah!

No more animals?!?! But I was just about to enter my killing-beast, which weighs in at 50 tons, has armored plating 10" thich and loves the sight of blood as a decoration.

No more animals?!?! But I was just about to enter my killing-beast, which weighs in at 50 tons, has armored plating 10" thich and loves the sight of blood as a decoration.


We do not care, and stop trying too sneak in shit about your animals.

And that would be cheap anyways.

Name: sasquatch
Size: Eight feet tall.
Discription: large hairy humanoid creature


http://bblmedia.com/sasquatch.jpg

Name: sasquatch
Size: Eight feet tall.
Discription: large hairy humanoid creature


http://bblmedia.com/sasquatch.jpg



FUCK YOU!!! NO MORE!!! NO MORE!!!FUCK ALL OF YOU!!!(Every last one)

I HATE PEOPLE!!!!


NO GODAMN MORE!!!!




NO MORE!!!











NO MORE!!!!THAT MEANS ALL OF YOU! YOU AND YOU AND YOU!


YOUR IDEA IS NOT SPECIAL OR AN EXCEPTION! NO MORE!










































If you just read it, he did ask you guys too stop some time ago.

OOC: Sorry everyone, school's had me down. I'll try and have another battle tomorrow...actually I guarantee I'll have another battle tomorrow. Thanks for sticking around.

OOC: Sorry everyone, school's had me down. I'll try and have another battle tomorrow...actually I guarantee I'll have another battle tomorrow. Thanks for sticking around.





I hate that thing that makes all the people go and do the stuff when they don't want to do the stuff and such because I don't like it when they all have to do all those things.


http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Whitey

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/MC_Hammer

Hello I'm the ring announcer! Welcome to the final match of the first round, where we will decide the best between Pirahna and Laughing Hyena. Now it is well known both animals work most efficiently in packs, so(and this was a stroke of luck in the drawing for seeds) we have bent the rules a bit for this match and allowed both competitors to work in teams. We have removed a circular section of the ring, and filled it with water for the Pirahnas. DING and we're under way. The hyenas have begun to circle the pool. They now are methodically dipping a hand under to try and scoop out a pirahna. One snaps at the tank with his mouth...and comes up with a pirahna! He bites down hard, and throws it away. A pirahna has jumped out onto the land now, and flopped toward a hyena! He grabs on with his teeth and starts flopping wildly! Another hyena has come over and torn the pirahna off of him. Oh, and a hyena slips into the pool! The water has been stained a dark red.

OOC: The battle continues on for a few hours.

IC: There are only a few pirahnas left in the tank! A few hyenas have jumped in now, and have killed the pirahnas. The game goes to the Hyenas! A hyena from the group will be selected to move on and face the Elephantman!

WINNER: LAUGHING HYENA

ELIMINATED: PIRAHNA

Here's the tree for the second round:

Ryuu
Cheshire Cat


Elephantman
Laughing Hyena

tag

my state-legendary geniuses,my animal is the trouser snake
comes in different colors and sizes,can be found almost everywhere.
I'm betting my national animal, the Nekkid Beaver, can beat yours in 5 minutes! :P

nice fight

OOC: Sorry everyone, inspiration just hasn't struck me. These fights in the second round are too good. I'm having trouble envisioning them. I'll try and post the next fight soon.

Nice idea. I'm definately going to enter into the next one, as long as I realize it's there before the spots are filled up. Maybe I could get an e-mail reminder when you do or something.

Hello, I'm the ring announcer. And welcome to our first second round battle, between Ryuu and the Cheshire Cat. It was an amazing first round, and hopefully the second round will be just as good if not better. The other match that will happen in the future is between the Elephantman and the Laughing Hyena. But here we go, we're underway!

The Cheshire Cat has immediately turned invisible and appears to have jumped into a self made wormhole-like portal. The other portal has appeared behind the dragon now, and the Cheshire Cat is out. Now an interesting thing here, the Ryuu appears to be able to still detect the Cat, due to it's large intelligence, it can tell where the pressure on the mat is, and where the air cuts the Cheshire Cat's body. Oh, now Ryuu lunges out-but misses! The Cheshire Cat has jumped onto Ryuu's head, and now grips Ryuu's already sore upper lip! The Ryuu throws his head, and manages to lose The Cheshire Cat, but not without causing serious damage to his snout! The Cheshire Cat was hit quite hard, and appears dazed. He seems to have lost his power to turn invisible, but that was of little use to him anyway. The Ryuu lunges out at the Cheshire Cat, and has pinned him down with is right hand. Ryuu slams him into the mat, while keeping him pinned. Oh no! The Cheshire Cat has bit down hard on the Ryuu's forearm, and is now scratching it violently. Is this one of the Cheshire Cat's trademark maulings? Ryuu and the Cheshire Cat have both relinquished grip, and it's open fight again. Cheshire Cat has turned invisible, it appears he must have recovered. He reappears under the Ryuu's belly, and has bit down hard! He holds on with his teeth while he scratches in a cyclical motion with both hands! The Ryuu reaches under, and rips him off-which again must be very painful-and throws him up in the air! The Ryuu now opens his mouth wide, and-oh no, this doesn't look good. The Ryuu must have his eyes closed, or is in a serious haze, because the Cheshire Cat has unsheathed all sets of claws, and is aiming them right for the insides of Ryuu's mouth. Oh no. The Ryuu takes the hit...unleashes a serious wail...spits out the Cheshire Cat...and throws in the towel. Ouch, man that must of hurt, like eating a Big Mac with a bunch of thumbtacks in it. But hey, what a match! The Cheshire Cat is now the champion of the top bracket, and will go on to face either the Elephantman or Laughing Hyena in the World Championship! Until next time!

WINNER: CHESHIRE CAT

ELIMINATED: RYUU

Ha! None can fight an Obsidian Rock!

Ha! None can fight an Obsidian Rock!


what? I don't know what the hell you mean, but I think he made it clear that there was to be no more animals.



Loved the fight by the way. Kickass.

what? I don't know what the hell you mean, but I think he made it clear that there was to be no more animals.

I don't think his obsidian rock is an animal as much as it is a... rock. Elephantman could crush it, I suppose...

I don't think his obsidian rock is an animal as much as it is a... rock. Elephantman could crush it, I suppose...


I suppose so.....hmmmm......

IC: Hello, I'm the ring announcer! And welcome to the bottom bracket championship between Laughing Hyena and Elephantman! The winner will go on to face Cheshire Cat in the galaxy championship! Elephantman is the heavy favorite, mostly due to his size. Here we go, Hyena sprints in circles around the Elephantman, and the Elephantman seems a bit dizzy. Hyena dashes through Elephantman's legs, and the Elephantman is down! The Hyena Jumps on the Elephantman's belly, and bites down hard. It doesn't appear to faze the Elephantman, and he takes a swing at the Hyena...but the Hyena dodges and the Elephantman hits himself right in the stomach! The Elephantman is winded now...he is on his stomach. The Hyena jumps up on his back and clamps down on his neck! This appears to do a lot of damage! Elephantman, still a bit short of breath, spins over, and the Hyena is sent flying. Elephant man is on his feet now, and lunges at the Hyena, but the Hyena dodges adeptly! The Hyena spins, and kicks with both rear legs right at the Elephantman's nose bone! A sickening crack is heard, and it appears the Elephantman's nose is at least sprained. The Elephantman has conceded the championship to the Laughing Hyena, who will go on to face Cheshire Cat in the Galactic Championship!

WINNER: LAUGHING HYENA

ELIMINATED: ELEPHANTMAN

Hurrah!

Mine is the gigantic :eek: BURNING MARTIAN! :eek:

Origin: Mars
Lifespan: 25, lives fast but pretty
Cool Speacials: Eats your brain :fluffle:

Mine is the gigantic :eek: BURNING MARTIAN! :eek:

Origin: Mars
Lifespan: 25, lives fast but pretty
Cool Speacials: Eats your brain :fluffle:

That stinks. You stink.

Mine is the gigantic :eek: BURNING MARTIAN! :eek:

Origin: Mars
Lifespan: 25, lives fast but pretty
Cool Speacials: Eats your brain :fluffle:



yah.



And he said no more, idiot.

Species: Great Wyvern
C:\Documents and Settings\Owner\My Documents\My Pictures\wyvern
Stats: Life span: 165 years
Weight: 1 mt (metric ton)
Height: 4 m
Wingspan: 10m
Talon size: 12cm
Stinger size: 16cm
Beak Size: 30cm
(If no image above) Silloute: Giant Bird of Prey
Muscular Strength: 565kgcm (Kilograms per Centimeter)
Poision Rating: Nerotoxin, fatal within 24 hours, peralysis within 20min
Flying Speed: 20kmph

For Fuck's Sake, None Of You Are Special! No One Cares! He Said No Fucking More! Wait For The Next One!

For Fuck's Sake, None Of You Are Special! No One Cares! He Said No Fucking More! Wait For The Next One!

OOC: As it turns out, the next one is coming up real soon...

IC: Hello! I'm the ring announcer! And welcome to the galactic championship fight between Laughing Hyena and Cheshire Cat! I'm pretty sure Hyena's are dogs, so it will be a fight between a dog and a cat, although it is an invisible cartoon cat, so maybe it's not quite a fair matchup. But here we go! The two lunge at each other, and it appears to be a brawl to the death! The Hyena has clamped onto the Cheshire Cat's neck, and the Cheshire Cat is swiping brutally at the Hyena's back. The Hyena swings his head back and forth violently and slams the Cheshire Cat into the ground, finally letting go of the Cheshire Cat's neck. The Cheshire Cat is not in good condition. He is flailing his arms about dizzily, and it looks as though the Hyena is about to make his death move. The Hyena charges at the Cat...and OH! let me walk you through that one. The Hyena lunges at the Cheshire Cat, but at the last moment, stops his feet and lets his momentum carry him forward. During his slide, he lowers his head and shoulders, then brings them up in an upward slam, smacking his snout under the Cat's chin. The Cat flew up in the air and fell flat on his face. This one looks over folks. The Cat gets up and is stumbling toward the Hyena. The Hyena runs quickly toward the Cheshire Cat, and grips his leg in his teeth. And the Hyena has begun to unceremoniously drag the Cheshire Cat all over the ring. Any moment now, the ref will call the match...there it is. The Laughing Hyena, representative of the Skull Islands, is the first ever Battle National Animals Galactic Champion! His prize is a very large side of lion meat. And I hope he enjoys it, because trust me, it was very difficult to sneak that little incident past those animal activists...AHEM. Let's take a look at Laughing Hyena's journey to greatness. Along with his companions, he fished out the pirahnas. He toppled a giant versus the Elephantman. And now he's defeated a rabid cartoon cat. No doubt he now plans on going to Disneyworld, were he will have a feast of Lion King, and show that Mufasa and Simba fought dirty to defeat scar. I'm the ring announcer, so long from Maniaca and the Battle National Animals Galactic Championship!

OOC: During this fight, I tried to place myself in the positions of the fighting animals. I nearly threw up.

OOC: I'm gonna' make another fight, this time for sixteen people, and then post the link here.

http://forums2.jolt.co.uk/showthread.php?p=7748185#post7748185

There's the link to Battle National Animals II

wow! Nice! I love it! Man, your a genius! Look at all the people who clamoured to play your game, too!


Great fight, I can imagine how it would be neausitating.