NationStates Jolt Archive

Author's note: A mod stuck at work is a bored mod. I was pointed to a funny series of articles about a fictional person known as Simon, the Bastard Operator From Hell. Boredom and inspiration met, shook hands, and gave me the idea to do something similiar. Only we're dealing with a fictional Nationstates, and the Bastard Moderator From Hell (assuming that in the fictional version of Nationstates, [violet] doesn't keep an eye on the mods). In short, this is what Nationstates would be if the mods abused power as much as people say we do!

The Bastard NS Moderator From HELL - Vol. 1

It's Monday, and I'm stuck at work when I could be doing better things with my time. Like breaking people's will to live. That's always fun, and gives me a warm fuzzy feeling inside. I login to Nationstates and ignore the pile of paperwork on my desk.

Damnit.

I have a telegram. I HATE telegrams. Don't these people know it's distracting when I'm trying to find a UN Proposal to kill at random?

"Received: 2 hours ago
Dear moderator,
My UN proposal vanished! What was wrong with it? It was in all the rules, and in the right category! What happened to my Anti-Proliferation of Orbital Weapons proposal?

Thanks,
Sheleo
UN Delegate"

I bring up the Mod Centre and take a look at Sheleo's stats. Frightening economy, excellent civil rights, moderate political freedoms, quaint little flag and motto, 1.3 billion pop... I remember this guy's proposal. It was the random kill of the day two days ago. A real stickler for playing seriously, probably invested a lot of time and effort into his nation, especially with his flowery, tear-jerker proposals for the benefit of humanity against ortillery and the like.

>clicky-clicky!<

There. Booted from the UN. Now they don't need to worry about disappearing proposals anymore! I love my job! I send off a quick reply and reward myself by shuffling some paperwork on the desk to the new guy's, without anybody seeing.

"Sorry, I think your proposal got deleted in a system error. Happens quite often. I don't think you'll need to worry about the UN stuff though. There's just been an update.

~Reploid Seductions the Game Mod"

Another complaint to the mods handled, I hop onto the forums to see the latest.

Those ingrates! Here I work my ass off for THEIR game, and all they do is whine about how I abuse my power! I jot down the names of the people posting to the "Take Away Reploid Seductions Mod Powers For the love of GOD!" thread, and 'accidentally' edit all the posts to support my wonderful modding.

Ah, and my favorite part of dealing with such infidels... I load each one up in the mod centre and play havoc with their nations. A few get the modbomb, one or two end up with animal pornography as their leading industry, and a few go from a Frightening economy to Imploded, and most of them get the 'reverse' population bug.

Ah... I can hear their cries of dismay already!

~Reploid Seductions the Game Moderator... from HELL!

To Be Continued....

Quick closing note: Any nations named in the course of these stories is made up entirely by me. If I pick a name that is an actual nation, feel free to let me know so that I can change it. Any similiarities to nations that exist or have existed are ENTIRELY coincidental :wink:

Great thread Rep. :lol:

*tag*

Haha, thats some good shit. Very good.

Very, very funny.

The Bastard NS Moderator From HELL - Vol. 2

Myriapod scratched the back of his head. He had no idea how the hell he'd gotten this position; he'd only known when his friend gave him a heads-up. "Hey, you're gonna be a mod!" "What?" "Yeah!"

It's been about two months now, and earlier mods look up to him slightly for advice... which also confuses him to no end. While all the other mods catch flak from every which direction--some for being to gregarious, some for being too harsh, some for simply existing--but he almost never did. He got mean telegrams once in a while, but they were never personal--just the usual antimod spam--and it all added up to just leave him thinking.

C'mon... I'm a total fraud here. The quiet one, the respected one, and I've no idea what the bloody hell I'm doing.

He remembers his days of earlier enthusiasm, when he found a whole nest of UN multies. He went through, finding more and more connections, kicking more and more worthless dishonorable cheaters. He thrilled at the sense of power, of putting a shiny combat boot of justice in the face of do-badders everywhere.

After the dust cleared, he discovered that he had managed to IP ban all of Penn State's students. Individually.

"Oops... sorry."

No one held it against him. It was "how people learn." It got fixed, it's all better. Now, when, say, Reploid Seductions did it, people were jumping down her throat, and she seemed nice enough.

Then there was the purge of the Nazis. They had been warned, and if Cadet Myriapod believed in anything, it was rules of engagement. Deleting through the lines of offenders, he again felt the thrill of doing something right... and that got a response, sure, until everyone realized Myriapod did it, so it must be okay.

Then the Luna Azul incident, where he slipped and made an assumption, putting an entire region in fear. Another giant protest... a meek "Ooops... sorry," and it was all fixed. No one minded.

Everything he did was wrong. Every decision, hurting more than it helped. And no one cared... which was the worst part. Other people took flak for what he did; then no one was willing to give him his comeuppance. He was the "nice guy," the "trustworthy one."

"Not only am I a fraud," he muttered to himself inbetween boot shinings, "but no one thinks so. It's a double standard. I hate double standards."

That loser is me. So if something goes terribly wrong, and your blood boils with having been so harshly wronged... just wait for the meek, apologetic telegram. That'll make it all better.

Because it's just Myriapod, and no one can seem to stay mad at me, no matter how much I think they should or how much I want them to.

I don't abuse my power, I'm just clumsy with it. Inordinately so.

~Myriapod the Game Moderator... from HELL!

:lol:

Keep it up!

Very funny, very nice.

Eh, I'd come up with some, but then it'd be taken out of context, yadda yadda yadda, and quite frankly, I just dont wanna put up the effort...lol

nice stories ;)

neut, you're just being lazy ;)

The Bastard NS Moderator From HELL - Vol. 3

Here I sit, here I stew.

A Forum Mod. Middle Managment. Bitterness incarnate.

No Mod Centre for me, I don't even know what it looks like.

I hit the Forums, the only place my piddling power exists.

I hit Moderation first. I find a few topics of people complaining. Lock, lock, lock, lock. I add the complainers to my mental list.

I hit Technical. I post URLs that provide no help. Lock, lock, lock, lock; more names to the list.

Finally, I wade into the RP Forums. More locks, threads moved, random split thread. I quickly log on to one of my other nations and flame the hell out of RP'ers I don't like, safe in the knowledge that any complaints to Moderation will be locked, and complaints to the Centre (damn it to Hell) will be ignored.

I gloat on IRC.

Ah, General. My next victim. I find every thread that vaguely offends my exteme political views. Lock half, delete the others. I go to page 4, lock every third thread. I find threads at 60 or so pages, log on to puppets and spam them to 65 pages. Delete them all, regardless of the "General Forum Rules" that those damned GM's came up with.

I twiddle my thumbs. It's boring now. Only a few complaints in Moderation (locked). I shrug, and hop back on to IRC. I give one of those dog-sucking GM's a few names on my hit-list. Have them deleted.

I check my telegrams. Report the senders for flaming, have them deleted too.

The cycle continues.

~ The Mighty Hatchet, Bitter Forum Moderator... from HELL!

This is deliciously great.

keep it up :P

Their main job is to have fun, they are volunteers, and your condescending sarcasm is annoying and unfounded.

Who said that they are not allowed to have fun :? Well, this asks for another sarcastic comment.

What exactly are the qualifications for becomming a mod? Can it be that a mod just needs a thick skin and a blind eye?
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A thick skin, a blind eye,
A good grin, and a sharp wit.

A moderator has the power to perform, but
the perogative to ignore sh*t.

A quick index-finger, a sense of irony,
an understanding of the rules, and most of all
a willingness to work for free.

[[They're volunteers that have given up a lot of their time to deal with crap. They can take breaks whenever they feel the need. As I say when I'm called upon as a volunteer to do some small task (and when not doing my duties), "I'm not not paid to do this."]]

The Bastard NS Moderator From HELL - Vol. 4

"Because I'm Slaggy. And everybody loves Slaggy."

Did he really need to type more?

Bill hovered about the forums like a curious housecat drifting in a room full of visitors. He had received the Game Mod promotion several months ago, but everyone knew all he was in reality was the most glorified Forum Mod everyone had ever seen. Rarely--if ever--did he tackle that dreaded Moderator Tasklist; after all, that would involve some sort of effort.

Instead, ol' Bill went after the forum issues. When the Rogue Nation of Notebookistan decided he was going to create fifty-nine topics about how Jetlagfreek's leader should be killed, Bill swooped down and issued the warning, being careful to attach his grinning prom sigpic to add that extra spice of Slaggy charm. Later, when Notebookistan was deleted, he wouldn't need to say much--just to pop into the Moderation forum and say, "Because I'm Slaggy. I have my reasons."

And they believed it. The crazy bastards truly believed that Bill was doing this all with the grace and wisdom of a man who LOVED moderation and who LOVED reaching fair and impartial decisions after due consideration. Slaggy was the one who thought things through, the rare voice of reason amid a bunch of fascist, evil commie mod Nazis. In his early days, he was good enough to have a reason for EVERYONE'S deletion, complete with link, copies of telegrams, PhotoShopped screen capture, and proper MLA citation.

Nowadays, though... it was just a matter of boredom.

The Rogue Nation of Notebookistan.

Deadened. Harassing Jetlagfreek.

The Most Serene Republic of Fag Burnination.

Deadened. Potentially offensive nation name.

The Republic of American Taco-Eaters.

Deadened. UN multis... uh... probably.

The United Socialist States of Djemdaiemdmaea.

Deadened. Can't pronounce his name.

The Community of Tagicupid.

Deadened. Sounds kind of like "Slag is stupid" if you read it right.

The Immortal Shogunate of Reploid Productions.

Deadened. Pure, unadulterated boredom.

Bill hesitated as the deletion screen stared him in the face. He tapped the top of his warm can of Meijer Cola and sighed, pushing his Buddy Holly specs back against his face.

"Well, shit... there goes admin."

But why would somebody delete the forum administrator? That makes absolutely no sense. Wouldn't she be stripped of power first at least? Had she been warned previously? If [violet] wanted Rep to be deleted, why did he/she/it make her forum admin in the first place? Isn't [reploidproductions] really Max Barry?

The inevitable "Why was Reploid Productions deleted?" topic appeared one minute and twenty-three seconds later... right about average. Bill rubbed his freshly growing goattee in nervous angst, trying desperately to attach a why to the deed. Then, at long last, he replied...

"Because I'm Slaggy. Everybody loves Slaggy."

~ Slaggy. Everybody loves Slaggy.

He remembers his days of earlier enthusiasm, when he found a whole nest of UN multies. He went through, finding more and more connections, kicking more and more worthless dishonorable cheaters. He thrilled at the sense of power, of putting a shiny combat boot of justice in the face of do-badders everywhere.

After the dust cleared, he discovered that he had managed to IP ban all of Penn State's students. Individually.

"Oops... sorry."

No one held it against him. It was "how people learn."
I worry about that happening to me! :cry:

I worry about that happening to me! :cry:

And I worry about you, don't you know that he's only joking? :lol:
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CorinThe
The getting help section! (http://www.nationstates.net/cgi-bin/index.cgi/page=help) (for all your gaming problems)http://www.nationstates.net/forum/templates/subSilver/images/whosonline.gif
The Central Pacific (http://www.nationstates.net/cgi-bin/index.cgi/page=display_region/region=the_central_pacific) (for The Pacific alternative.)

Seriously, I have been assured that my university network is OK, but if the admin over here change things and other students start playing . . . :shock:

Seriously, I have been assured that my university network is OK, but if the admin over here change things and other students start playing . . . :shock:

Your university has .edu or .org on their names, which makes them easy recognizable as a group of students :P
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CorinThe
The getting help section! (http://www.nationstates.net/cgi-bin/index.cgi/page=help) (for all your gaming problems)http://www.nationstates.net/forum/templates/subSilver/images/whosonline.gif
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It is actually .ac.uk, but apparently they recognise that one too. I guess I am a bit paranoid, with UN membership being so vital to me.

Superb :lol:

gotta go with Hack's being the best so far.

And Neut surely you are gonna get stick for not doing one? cause obviously you are the only mod without a sense of humour(j/k)

gotta go with Hack's being the best so far.


I dunno, I rather like Slag DEATing Reppy... :D

I dunno, I rather like Slag DEATing Reppy... :D
true but hey i'm a sucker for bitter and twisted

gotta go with Hack's being the best so far.

Reploids' is the best one in my opinion, though admittedly, I'm heavily influenced by that one being close to the original BOFH series.

Ballotonia

After reading this I have decided that this requiresaction...serious action.......action ot deal with the mods. the action? Sucking up!!!!


Slag you are so funny
Neut are of your actions improve the entire world
Rep, you are the best admin.

Slag you are so funny
Neut are of your actions improve the entire world
Rep, you are the best admin.

Translation: I hate Hack and Scolo, they suck. :P

Slag you are so funny
Neut are of your actions improve the entire world
Rep, you are the best admin.

Translation: I hate Hack and Scolo, they suck. :P

Hack- you are so funny

Scolo - you're the best!

;)

Slag you are so funny
Neut are of your actions improve the entire world
Rep, you are the best admin.

Translation: I hate Hack and Scolo, they suck. :PNo. Translation is that I know neut, slagand rep best.

Hack: You can make any situation make sense.
Scolo: you are the most helpful person on the forums...

...A few get the modbomb, one or two end up with animal pornography as their leading industry...

:shock:

That should soooooo be added as a real industry!!! :D

ROTFLM*O! I am sitting in the library's internet room laughing my head off. "Ok Miss I will be quiet."

Um, normally I do not propose game additions as I know how futile they are, but what about e-mail spam scams as a major industry? Could we have that as a major industry for Capitalist Paradise / Capitalizt countries?

That would only work it your in Nigeria.

This...scares me slightly. It's funny, but a bit frightning.

Very entertaining...thanks for the comic relief. Can't wait to read more. :-)

Bastard Modling from Hell coming . . .

LMAO! ROFL! LOL!

this makes me want to do a n00b from hell :lol:

gotta go with Hack's being the best so far.


I dunno, I rather like Slag DEATing Reppy... :D
Same here. :P

I also like the one about can't pronounce the . . .

Uh oh. :(

Please mods don't DEAT me for having a hard to pronounce name. :wink:

LMAO! ROFL! LOL!

this makes me want to do a n00b from hell :lol:
Wait if not form hell, where do n00bs come from. :? ( :wink: )

:lol:

Thats great...



:|

uh oh

how long till someone comes on and complains that its all true... :shock:
:o

LMAO! ROFL! LOL!

this makes me want to do a n00b from hell :lol:
Wait if not form hell, where do n00bs come from. :? ( :wink: )


that one obscure forum where n00bs priside

LMAO! ROFL! LOL!

this makes me want to do a n00b from hell :lol:
Wait if not form hell, where do n00bs come from. :? ( :wink: )


that one obscure forum where n00bs priside

*gasps*

Not...

STORMFRONT!!!

*runs*

:P

LMAO! ROFL! LOL!

this makes me want to do a n00b from hell :lol:
Wait if not form hell, where do n00bs come from. :? ( :wink: )


that one obscure forum where n00bs priside

*gasps*

Not...

STORMFRONT!!!

*runs*

:P

Stop running damn you!

*sets bear traps*

We scared the mods away, now we won't get any more installments. :cry: ( :P )

We scared the mods away, now we won't get any more installments. :cry: ( :wink: )


No...they'll just "accidentally" DEAT us. ;-)

*Sets mod traps*

I'd like to see them try :P


yes thats a joke,please don't delete me mods!

We scared the mods away, now we won't get any more installments. :cry: ( :wink: )


No...they'll just "accidentally" DEAT us. ;-)
So I guess it gets down to will the evil mods dlete you first fo having the longer name and ruling the larger region, or me first, for having the name that they have no clue how to pronunce. :wink:

yes thats a joke,please don't delete me mods!
:twisted: te he he he :twisted:

We scared the mods away, now we won't get any more installments. :cry: ( :wink: )


No...they'll just "accidentally" DEAT us. ;-)
So I guess it gets down to will the evil mods dlete you first fo having the longer name and ruling the larger region, or me first, for having the name that they have no clue how to pronunce. :wink:

A real stickler for playing seriously, probably invested a lot of time and effort into his nation, especially with his flowery, tear-jerker proposals for the benefit of humanity against ortillery and the like.

&gt;clicky-clicky!&lt;

There. Booted from the UN. Now they don't need to worry about disappearing proposals anymore! I love my job! I send off a quick reply and reward myself by shuffling some paperwork on the desk to the new guy's, without anybody seeing.

"Sorry, I think your proposal got deleted in a system error. Happens quite often. I don't think you'll need to worry about the UN stuff though. There's just been an update.

~Reploid Seductions the Game Mod"

http://www.freewebs.com/goobergunch/goobergunchia.html

:o

yes thats a joke,please don't delete me mods!
:twisted: te he he he :twisted:

I knew I should have made it the same color! :x :lol:

yes thats a joke,please don't delete me mods!
:twisted: te he he he :twisted:

I knew I should have made it the same color! :x :lol:

Martin, Nu, I've created a new thread to keep us from hijacking this one (of course it was hijacked already, but if we let it alone we'll revert it, and I want to watch the evil mods some more :P ).

http://www.nationstates.net/forum/viewtopic.php?p=1762061#1762061

The Bastard NS Moderator from HELL - Vol. 5

((OOC: Since this is a FICTIONAL NS, I'm assuming Slaggy meant Reploid Seductions, not Productions :wink: ))

Another day, another coworker mysteriously dead in the file room. A day that starts with a coworker driven to suicide is a good day indeed. Plop down in my comfy chair and head over to Nationstates.

Username:
>clicky-clicky-clicky<
Reploid Seductions

Password:
>clicky-clicky-clicky-clickety<

There is no nation known as "reploid_seductions". Perhaps you misspelled it?

.... What. The. F---?! I know my nation damn well exists! This smells fishy, and I for one hate fish. Did the site admin catch on to me? I head for the Mod Centre. With a sigh of relief, I find my Mod Centre username and password still work. Excellent, now to find out what happened to my nation, and exact vengence if necessary.

A few pages into the moderator log, I find the damning evidence.

--OCT 7TH 12:46:04 slaggy deleted nation "reploid_seductions"
--OCT 7TH 12:45:19 slaggy examined nation "reploid_seductions"

I smile to myself. I am going to enjoy this.

>clicky-clicky!<

I'm BACK!

>clicky-clicky<

What? You think I'd delete Slaggy back? Tsk, too basic, too simple. And he could reverse it, just like I reversed his DEATing of me. A few deft keystrokes later and he's "The Reploid Seductions Slave Colony of Slaggy", and his major industry is slave marketing and carbombings on demand. I also murder his population, civil rights, economy, and political freedoms.

Satisfied, I head over to the forums and login to my OTHER forum account.

Yes. Not only am I Reploid Seductions, the bastard moderator from hell, I am also [reploidseductions], the forum admin from hell! I open the admin panel for the forums and load Slaggy up. Ah, they're so vulnerable like that, when I gaze upon their userinfo, mine to alter or destroy at will!

>clicky-clicky!<

No longer is his title "Game Moderator", now it's "Adoring Slave". While I'm at it, I delete the forum accounts for his roleplay puppets, "The Inbred Islands" and "Freezinatonia". That ought to teach that trainee mod from hell to mess with his superiors!

While I'm in the admin panel, I also ban a few IP ranges at random. It's good to keep the users on their toes, never knowing when they'll be able to actually get into the forums. I should accidentally purge all posts over an hour old as well. Haven't done that for awhile. I scribble a note to self to do that and stick it in my dayplanner, right next to Dead UN Delegate of the Day note.

I lean back with a smile and check the clock. Excellent, time for lunch! Slaggy should be online by the time I get back (in three hours), so I'll be able to see the results of my handiwork.

It's good to be mod.

~Reploid Seductions the Game Mod... from HELL!

To Be Continued....

The Bastard NS Moderator from Hell – Vol. 6

I sit back in my chair. A smile plays across my pale face that hasn't seen the light of day for several months. I pull a slice of week old pizza from the top box of a pile of twenty. It is a good day.

Ever since I had kissed up to [violent] and gotten this choice spot I was spending all of my waking time in NationStates. It was great, more and more power by the day, and no official responsibilities to get in my way. Hmm, what to do today? I post a few more brownnosing posts to the mods (Maybe I'll gain the powers of a game mod soon?) and post again that I don't want game mod (Too much responsibility). Hmm.

An idea strikes. I hack NationStates and introduce a loophole into the code, now, if you try to send a telegram to the nation I wanna be a mod you gain full moderator access. Now, just to write up a report of how I found this bug and how to fix it and I'll be in the good graces of [violent] once again. Now onto the real fun . . .

I browse the Tech forum, randomly locking threads, and deleting any threads with recommendation of how to improve the game (More work for me). Oh, there's one with an actual vunerability . . . DELETE! Now, I'll hide this for a while so that I don't need to do any work . . . so much nicer. Hmm, I'll have him deleted while I'm at it, I don't like other people poking around my game. “Hey, Rep Sed, I have a nation for you to delete . . .” so easy.

I'm bored again. I think that I'll start reading through all of the national settings. Hmm, so that's the e-mail of that nation, they've been bugging me, I'll send a e-mail to their ISP. Oh? That's a high-school network? I'm sure that playing games on the web is against the rules, another e-mail and another life ruined. I love messing with people who actually have girlfriends and have a life outside of the internet. So much fun. Now, let's see, I've hacked 135 players, framed 64 of them, and have personally written the scripts for Facist Spain and will soon have access to the underlying code of NS. All I could ever dream of.

Hmm, time to order another pizza.

SalusaSuckUppus – The Tech Modling from Hell

Finally something worth reading in the forums. :)

Nicely done, all of you.

Just to give prop's where prop's are due - the original BOFH:

http://bofh.ntk.net/Bastard.html

As far as rating goes - I wouldn't read it if you don't like foul language, senseless violence, or sexual references. While these are scattered, they are there. Just fair warning.

I knew it! So THAT'S what you all do all day! :lol:


Seriously, seriously funny.

In short, this is what Nationstates would be if the mods abused power as much as people say we do!

Hmm, so you do abuse your power? :)

Anyways, great stories :) I think Slaggy has the best one so far, though. Deletion of Reploid Productions (Seductions?) was pretty funny :P

chants *more, more, more*

I now say that volume 5 is the best.

Let us see if Slagdore can couter. :twisted:

:lol: they are just getting better and better.

please sir can we have some more....

Come on, step forward, Menelmacar...

And Enodia.
I wan to watch the proposals get deleted en masse. :twisted:

I have a complaint SalSec, your loop hole doesn't work. I didn't get full moderator access..................... :lol:

Hmm, so you do abuse your power? :)


Only when we're playing pranks on eachother :wink:

Hmm, so you do abuse your power? :)

No, we do not abuse our powers.

-The Evilly-Biased Power-Hungry Conservatively-Liberal Rampaging Virginal Sex-Fiendish Homophobic-Bisexual National-Socailsticish DEAT-Happy Judge, Jury, and Executioning Moddom of Neutered Sputniks

I liked the old motto better.

"Feel the POWER!!!!!"

And when's your volume coming out neut?

Eh, I'd come up with some, but then it'd be taken out of context, yadda yadda yadda, and quite frankly, I just dont wanna put up the effort...lol

Hmm I must'a missed that. Anyway. Right.

I still think it'd be funny .. and so much real life material to draw on for your writing! "Flamed by x .. deated .. dont like that sig .. deated" ;)

Nah, it'd be more like "So and so is complaining again, DEAT. I've already answered Y's question before, DEAT. Etc..."

Tag. :lol:

And Enodia.
I wan to watch the proposals get deleted en masse. :twisted:

Would he DEAT his pesterer? ;-)

No, we do not abuse our powers.

-The Evilly-Biased Power-Hungry Conservatively-Liberal Rampaging Virginal Sex-Fiendish Homophobic-Bisexual National-Socailsticish DEAT-Happy Judge, Jury, and Executioning Moddom of Neutered Sputniks
:lol:
you sure you're not english your sarcasm is of the highest level. A+ well done

Definately TAG this. ^_^

Definately TAG this. ^_^

Why? :?

Though it's very funny, and I incourage moderator actions like this one, I don't think it's educational to the NS players.
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CorinThe
The getting help section! (http://www.nationstates.net/cgi-bin/index.cgi/page=help) (for all your gaming problems)http://www.nationstates.net/forum/templates/subSilver/images/whosonline.gif
The Central Pacific (http://www.nationstates.net/cgi-bin/index.cgi/page=display_region/region=the_central_pacific) (for The Pacific alternative.)

he's not asking for it to be sticked, he is mearly &lt;tag&gt;ing it, so he can get back to it later

It's just like most books; When you read it once, you had enough, but I understand :)
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CorinThe
The getting help section! (http://www.nationstates.net/cgi-bin/index.cgi/page=help) (for all your gaming problems)http://www.nationstates.net/forum/templates/subSilver/images/whosonline.gif
The Central Pacific (http://www.nationstates.net/cgi-bin/index.cgi/page=display_region/region=the_central_pacific) (for The Pacific alternative.)

It's just like most books; When you read it once, you had enough, but I understand :)

1. actualy, I've read it about 5 times, and I'm still smiling

2. He may have not had enoph time to read all of it

3. the mods are probably going to come out with more (I hope Slag does)

3. the mods are probably going to come out with more (I hope Slag does)

Therefore, iKick.

3. the mods are probably going to come out with more (I hope Slag does)

Therefore, iKick.


The mods are busy deleting eachother.... :lol:

tagestr

he's not asking for it to be sticked, he is mearly &lt;tag&gt;ing it, so he can get back to it later

((OOC: But... I'm a girl! &gt;.&lt;))

he's not asking for it to be sticked, he is mearly &lt;tag&gt;ing it, so he can get back to it later

((OOC: But... I'm a girl! &gt;.&lt;))

Doing allot of homework :wink: Btw, you're not the only girl here.
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CorinThe
The getting help section! (http://www.nationstates.net/cgi-bin/index.cgi/page=help) (for all your gaming problems)http://www.nationstates.net/forum/templates/subSilver/images/whosonline.gif
The Central Pacific (http://www.nationstates.net/cgi-bin/index.cgi/page=display_region/region=the_central_pacific) (for The Pacific alternative.)

*looks sheepish*he's not asking for it to be sticked, he is mearly &lt;tag&gt;ing it, so he can get back to it later

((OOC: But... I'm a girl! &gt;.&lt;))

:shock: *looks sheepish* uh......... oh boy

And Enodia.
I wan to watch the proposals get deleted en masse. :twisted:

Sadly it's a case of "study first, work on witty satire second" right about now.

And Enodia.
I wan to watch the proposals get deleted en masse. :twisted:

Sadly it's a case of "study first, work on witty satire second" right about now.

Awww...

*hugs*

...

*disappears in suspicious circumstances*

Hey...the new mods can be Bastard NS Mods from Hell! I wonder what TG and Sirocco are planning....

&lt;----watches as all of his posts are deleted

Hey...the new mods can be Bastard NS Mods from Hell! I wonder what TG and Sirocco are planning....

&lt;----watches as all of his posts are deleted


Good idea :o

:twisted:

The Bastard NS Moderator from Hell – Vol. 7

So there I was, wearing the colours for the first time, looking for something to Moderate.

Hmm . . . some guy worried about his rainforests in Technical. Damn tree-hugger. No, mining just a bit of uranium won't do any harm at all. Hehe, sucker.

And yet another n00b asking to be made Founder. Huh. Damn, too late, someone posted while I was typing. Never mind. Clicky clicky. There, that looks nice and efficient, doesn't it?

General Forum now . . . aww, look, there's another attention-seeking thread. Some girl's random relationship dilemma, complete with a poll, no less. Yeah, right, like you're gonna get any half-decent relationship advice from an online gaming community. Tap-tap-tap, and the admission "Yes, this is a cry for help, you satisfied?" is appended.

What else? Well, I've been playing NS World for ages, shame I can't delete any of the griefers I know. Oooh, how about jumping from one griefer region to another? That'll spook them! Leave a dark hint or two on the message boards? Hehe, I can imagine the panicked exchange of telegrams and the chaos in Moderation now . . .

And then, off to the private forum for some bitching about the day's events. Life is sweet . . .

The Bastard NS Moderator from Hell – Vol. 8

I sit by my computer, deciding on how to flex my new found moderation skills... tum te tum, let's see what we have here... a thread moaning about how the UN should be improved by incorporating some kind of special code that... eh what the hell, sounds like Technical to me!

I swing the mouse over the brand new shiny button with an arrow on it.

Click!

...

CLICK!

What? Invalid_session?!

Damn...

Back! Move! Click! Invalid_session

I repeat this cycle for roughly five minutes.

Ah, dang 'em all to heck!

And with a confident sweep of the finger, the thread disappeared to the happy posting ground in the sky. Satisfied, I went off to see what more 'moderation' I could wreak...

--Sirroco, the Bastard NS Moderator from HELL!!--

Salusa, I'm surprised there was nothing in your volume about your secret life as Violet AND Max Barry!

Salusa, I'm surprised there was nothing in your volume about your secret life as Violet AND Max Barry!

Or the vicarious secret relationship between them... :P

[violet] and Max Barry that is... :P

(There is something similar to this in the origional BOFH)

Great job Mods! Seriously funny stuff. Not to offend any religious folks, but does anyone get the feeling this is exactly what God does when he's bored?

God, the great Moderator in the sky. :twisted:

And then, off to the private forum for some bitching about the day's events. Life is sweet
I picture the private forum as some kind of gentlemans club. Plump red leather chairs, antique books on large shelfs, people with pipes and glasses of brandy. Oak panneling on the walls, green beize desks, all that kind of thing.

Reploid is the president of the club, hes older than the others, wearing wire rimmed spectacles, sitting in a chair reading a book by the flickering firelight.

I picture the private forum as some kind of gentlemans club.
Hardly. More like a police canteen. Not much in the way of respite, just mulling over work stuff.

For starters, Rep is a SHE, and it's more like a hole in the wall bar where anything goes and everyone knows each other...

For starters, Rep is a SHE, and it's more like a hole in the wall bar where anything goes and everyone knows each other...
Women aren't allowed :wink:

Its just how I pictured it anyway, I take no responsibility for accuracy

The Bastard NS Moderator from Hell - Vol. 9

Another day, another DEAT. I kick back and put my feet up on my desk, watching some fansubbed anime on my computer when I ought to be working. Nobody ever catches me goofing off though- it's funny that they never have been able to fix that awful squeak in the hallway that serves as part of my alert system. Of course, most people know not to bother me when my door is shut. A couple of encounters with the lightly electrified doorknob serves well. (Nobody else knows that I rigged up wiring to collect the static generated on the carpet for my own nefarious use.)

During a boring part of the anime, I click over to Nationstates to see how my corrupt dictatorship is doing. Outlawed/Frightening/Outlawed. Beautiful.... except this tag at the bottom of the page informing me of a communication from somebody. I frown, and curiously, I click the link. Perhaps it's just the usual random "Move to x-region" spam or "support this proposal!" spam. People who send me those usually find proposals mysteriously lost in a system error and regions renamed to random strings of letters. (And if I'm in a really bad mood, nations that send those sorts of spam mysteriously go missing...)

I frown at the telegram. Somebody requesting I rename a region they don't like, even if that means abusing my powers, just because they don't like it.

>clicky-clicky!<

He's gone. Nobody can be more of a bastard (or bitch, given my gender which gets questioned on a regular basis online) than I am!

Granted, a brief check of the region, and I change its name anyway.

After that, I post ominous "Voice of Mod" messages to regions at random, promising UN-castration of entire regions allegedly full of multies. Then I just sit back and watch the panic as nations scramble to get out of the 'targeted' regions or to claim their innocence.

With a satisfied grin, I go back to my anime.

To Be Continued...

I get this feeling the mods are going around reciting old Dirty Harry lines.
Like muttering underbreath "do you feel lucky punk?, well do you?"..

8)

come on, slag....

Cross-reference: http://www.nationstates.net/forum/viewtopic.php?t=80634

&lt;tag&gt; More, more! This is great.

&lt;tag&gt; More, more! This is great.

&lt;tag&gt; More, more! This is great.

The Bastard NS Moderator from Hell - Vol. 10

Well, I've been a mod for a few days now, I know the routine, first I look at the NationStates forum. Hmm... a war thread... maybe that should go in II... but this has always been a bit of a grey area anyway... *click!* alright that's one less thread to deal with! Hey! This thread has over 180 pages! That's well over the limit! Hmm... wasn't that just for General? Meh, who cares. *click!*
International Incidents next, ho hum ho hum, people are selling more and more strange things, oh look someone's selling Volkswagens! How fun! How very entrépeneur... *click!*
OK! UN forum now... what's this? Your region doesn't have a UN report? What a shame! What do I do about this now, just let me thiiiink... I know! *click!*
Ah Technical, we all know the score! Lock, lock, lock, lock, we'll keep that one, it'll annoy Salusa, lock, lock, and one deletion for good measure! Wahey!
Moderation, easy: Just type 'Report this using the Getting Help page.'. Copy, paste, copy, paste, lock, Copy, paste, lock, lock et cetera.
The private forum! OK! Let's have some fun! Dah de dah, I believe so-and-so should be deleted, and this guy IP banned. Right! On we go!
General... lock, lock, lock, move, move, move, warning given to some guy who said 'ass' to make him nervous, that should be fun.
NS2, no new posts except those seemingly endless ones coming out of Catholic Yurop as per usual... oh! The same with the JG forum...

Dah de dah, what do my telegrams say?

Recieved 2 hours ago: y do u keep sending me that ishue? i think smoking is bad.

What the hell? Okay...

We've been watching you for a few weeks and we believe you to be the centre of a terrorist organisation, cunningly using the forums to instigate crimes against the world. The FBI have been informed and you are going DOWN!

King Siroc

Heh heh heh, I love my job...

--Sirroco, the Bastard NS Moderator from HELL!!--

I can see even more evil ways to be a forum mod, but they would also work (for the most part) with normal players, so I am considering a thread "The Bastard NS Puppet Addict From Hell" :twisted:

More, more!

Very funny Mods.

Just think: This might be what they COULD do. :lol:

Jim

P.S. Not sarcasm.

we want more!

The Bastard NS Moderator From HELL- Vol. 11

Another day, another bloody freaking telegram. You'd think these people would realize that by messaging me, I get their nation name, and that automatically puts them on my radar. DEATing nations at random isn't all that amusing. DEATing nations that bother me... now THAT's fun!

I hop on to the NS forums while listening to hear if the new intern at the office is going to try the doorknob. I love training the newbies. It's verily amusing, and electroshock therapy works wonders!

Let's see... oppress my people some more... excellent, no response from dear old Slaggy (I guess he learned his lesson. I should be a teacher, I really should!). Mess with the nation titles of the n00b mods- that's always fun, but I must train them in the ways of bastard moderating. Don't want players to start thinking the mods are like, helpful or anything!

To my amazement, my office door opens! I spin around in surprise, only to find the new guy in my doorway, wearing a pair of rubber gloves. I narrow my eyes slightly, suddenly glad I have the forums open and not the mod centre.

"Yes?" I inquire in a sickeningly sweet voice, while plotting how to remove this new threat to my fun.

"I noticed this building has a really bad static problem." He smiles, indicating his gloves. I see it in his eyes. He's on to me. And smart enough to evade the electrified doorknob. This may call for drastic measures.

"My stapler is out, and there's no more in the supply room. Mind if I borrow your stapler?" He asks, peering at me.

"Go right on ahead." I bite out with a smile. He nods and reaches for it, glancing at my computer screen.

"Oh! You play Nationstates, too?" His face lights up. Ah-ha! Useful information.

"Yes, actually, I do." I smile wider, though he seems oblivious to the evil intent I must be radiating.

"Y'roleplay on the forums?" He asks sweetly. Oh gods, a bloody freaking roleplayer. I hate those types, all engrossed in their little play worlds with their spacedyships and ubern00ks and crap.

"Oh... a bit." I lie. "What's your nation's name?"

Will he fall for it? Will he? Oh please let him fall for it! Pretty please!

"Loud Noises." He smiles happily as he starts chattering about his nation and some roleplay about the kidnapping of some other nation's leader. I smile and nod, cheering to myself at this fool and the fact he was stupid enough to tell me his online identity.

When he asks me what my nation is, I give him the name of some other stupid RPer and shoo him out the door with the stapler, claiming I have important work to do. He prances down the hall, so happy he met a fellow NS player.

Little did he realize he had met the Bastard NS Mod from Hell!

Shutting the door, and making a note to myself to find some other way to booby trap it, lest my other coworkers start getting ideas, I load up the mod centre, punch in "Loud Noises", and smile wickedly, my cursor hovering over the "Delete Loud Noises" button. On a whim, I crack my door open a tiny bit so I can hear the goings on a bit better, and return to my seat.

>clicky-clicky!<

DEAT. Ah, I feel better already! I listen for the results. These RPer types are so addicted that I bet he plays from work, and his deletion is probably very soon to be discovered.

Moments later, I hear a loud scream of agony and a gunshot. Satisfied, I shut my door again and prop my feet on the desk. Another day, another DEAT, and another coworker dead by suicide.

To Be Continued...

NS2, no new posts except those seemingly endless ones coming out of Catholic Europe as per usual... oh! The same with the JG forum...

Hey I'm mentionned! :lol:


And I supported you for modship, Sirocco!

still funny as hell! :lol:

The Bastard NS Moderator From HELL- Vol. 11
:shock: Dark!

This thread is scaring the heck out of me. What was the e-mail of [violet] again? :twisted:

-------------------------------------------------------------------------
*
CorinThe
The getting help section! (http://www.nationstates.net/cgi-bin/index.cgi/page=help) (for all your gaming problems)http://www.nationstates.net/forum/templates/subSilver/images/whosonline.gif
The Central Pacific (http://www.nationstates.net/cgi-bin/index.cgi/page=display_region/region=the_central_pacific) (for The Pacific alternative.)

This thread is scaring the heck out of me. What was the e-mail of [violet] again? :twisted:

Do you really wish to awaken the Bastard Admin from Hell? :)

Ballotonia

Do you really wish to awaken the Bastard Admin from Hell? :)

The Almighty God - [violet]... :(

please sir.... can I have some more????

ehm ... eh ... yeah ... uhm



sure

*chants*

[violet]! [violet]! [violet]! [violet]!

And Corinthe, you're going to do Marathon?

:P

*runs*

Poor Whisper :shock:

Hmm, so you do abuse your power? :)

No, we do not abuse our powers.

-The Evilly-Biased Power-Hungry Conservatively-Liberal Rampaging Virginal Sex-Fiendish Homophobic-Bisexual National-Socailsticish DEAT-Happy Judge, Jury, and Executioning Moddom of Neutered Sputniks

:wink:

:wink:

Bastard NS Moderator Vol. 12

They promoted me!

How in the hell did that happen? Really hard to be bitter when a promotion's dropped in your lap... but, then again, now I can do things I've longed to do. Well, I suppose I should get to work...

First things first. Let's take a look at the fabled Mod Centre (damn Aussies... always spelling things wrong...)

Wow. What a dump. Looks like a 2-year-old programmed it. I mean, I was expecting something slick and neat. Eh... who cares? Power needn't be pretty, right?

I ignore the tasklist, and immediately fire up my nation. I scroll down to the secret areas and start tweaking. I always was pissed about how my nation type changed. Well, clicky clicky, and now it's a Corporate Bordello again. Hm. Few more clicks and my IT is through the roof.

That reminds me...

That punk Sunrise was gloating in IRC a couple weeks back that his IT was higher than mine... clicky clicky. Now it's banned. Nah... clicky clicky, now it's negative. Won't he be surprized when he comes in dead last?

I suddenly remember my enemies list Well, I delete some of them, and read the telegrams of the others. Then I whack a few anti-Nazi's, just to piss people off.

Oh, hell... this is logged, isn't it? I examine a bunch of popular regions, and do some worthless UN checks. I do about five pages worth to bury my actions. And as an added bonus, I might just top the next GM report.

Bastard NS Modling from HELL

With the sound of a small jet engine I boot up the 15 computers in my parents basement, causing the lights to dim for a minute. Hell, who needs lights? At least my fridge and coffee maker are on a UPS. Need that caffiene in the morning. So let's see what to do?

Hmm, some nation called Finite Circle is giving useful advise in the Tech forum. I could delete him, but that's too easy. I know, he's a UN multi! Well, he wasn't before, but now he is solidly linked to 150 different UN nations, all of them trying to invade the Pacific. Now that is called two birds with one stone. This way my secret slave of Facist Espana will retain power there and I weild ultimate power over many nations. About time for him to eject another 70 nations too. I'll edit the logs. Hey! What do you know? He only ejected 3 and he has telegrams to prove that they were greifing him.

What's this? An email from Maxx Barrry himself? He thinks that I might be abusing my powers? How could he even suspect that, I long ago ensured that none of my actions are logged. Well, no big deal . . . . let's see what he thinks when a UN ranking is REVERSED! That should give him an idea of how nice I can be if he questions me. (Next time maybe I'll IP ban [dead], that would be amusing).

Back the the tech forum. Hmm, here's a post by some n00b asking why they get a busy signal when they dial in to AOL . . . Oh, some days this is too easy. I turn to my excuse calander. Aha! Today it is "Irregular network timing." Too believable. I turn to rip it off, but then I have a genius idea.


Hmm, Yes. I am familiar with this issue. It sounds as if the connection is suffering from irregular network timing. Fortunately, this is an easy problem to fix. All you need to do is defibrillate the network connection. Check to see if your business has an AED (or defibrillator) for use on people with heart attacks. If they have one, place one paddle on either side of your modem (if external, your computer case if internal), and defibrillate your modem. If you don't have access to one, don't worry. Just take an extension cord, strip the end to have two bare wires and plug them into the phone jack. Then plug the other end into a wall outlet. This will defibrillate the modems on AOL's end. Either way, I promise you that you won't be getting any busy signals for a while.

Glad I could help.

http://www.nationstates.net/images/flags/uploads/silliussoddus.jpg
SalusaSuckUppus
Tech Modling


Now I just lock it to keep anyone from correcting me and sit back to watch the fireworks.

*claps*

brilliant!

RE:
*claps*

brilliant!

What's this? An email from Maxx Barrry himself? He thinks that I might be abusing my powers? How could he even suspect that, I long ago ensured that none of my actions are logged. Well, no big deal . . . . let's see what he thinks when a UN ranking is REVERSED! That should give him an idea of how nice I can be if he questions me. (Next time maybe I'll IP ban [dead], that would be amusing).

So that's what happened today.... ;)

~Goobergunchia

lol Goobah Gunshah ;)

brilliant! I hope [violet] posts something too, I can't think of anything myself, sitting on the computer not doing my homework for 15 years (and still counting) isn't really helpful for your IQ...

Still continues to be funny! We want more! :D

Tag

The (Cranky) Bastard NS Moderator from HELL- Vol. 13

Grumbling, I sit down at my home computer and pop a couple of asprin with a groan. My head is pounding, and I feel like I could go to bed and sleep for a week!

Hey, even Bastard Mods from Hell have off days, and I was off so bad it's not even funny! I ended up awake all damned weekend ready to evacuate from a brushfire (and I'm not even the one responsible for it this time!), so I've been running purely on adrenaline and caffeine for the past 96 hours. My eyes are sore and puffy from all the crap in the air, my throat hurts, and I generally feel like death warmed over.

To say I'm cranky right now would be an understatement, much like calling the Pacific ocean a large puddle.

I hop onto the evil IRC lair, and run right into a debate between the active mods about some stupid game bug causing havoc in the Indian Ocean. Always the goddamned Indian Ocean. We never hear about problems from the Central Indian Ocean or anything, geez! I argue halfheartedly that we shouldn't bother doing diddly- we're bastard mods, not miracle make-people-happy people. Those idiots voted that dictator in, it's their own damned fault if they can't organize a counter invasion. Hell, if I wanted to, I could probably organize such an invasion- without even ONCE utilizing my modly powers.

So, yeah, I bow out of the debate. My head hurts, I'm tired, and I don't feel like argueing, at least not in a coherent manner. Hell, I don't even get the enjoyment I usually do out of randomly forumbanning IP ranges or DEATing people who telegram me. I'm WAY off my groove.

Eh, screw it, I think to myself, and log off for the night. I'll catch some downtime and return fully refreshed to be a bastard!

The next morning... okay, afternoon, really, since 2 pm hardly counts as 'morning', I awaken still feeling like crap, though a little better than the day prior. I just feel bleah and cranky, ready to unleash my crankiness on the first unsuspecting idiot to earn my modly wrath!

Which, upon checking the Moderation forum, doesn't take long. Honestly, there are tards out there with a net connection and some axe to grind who need to shut the eff up. I wade through threads that send my BS meter soaring through the roof and bring my headache back with a vengence.

Heck, if I'm going to suffer because of these idiots who can't figure out if they're happy that the OH SO EVIL MODS were overruled by the rare appearance of [violent], or if the ENTIRE STAFF SHOULD BE CRUCIFIED for being OH SO EVIL, I damn well intend to make them suffer from making my headache worse!

I load up the mod centre, feeling the evil within me pound in synch with my pounding headache. Oh, they will SUFFER MY WRATH!

A quick check through the list brings me many names to act against. I smile and load up the first victim. - Magma -. DEAT. FBI Misinformant. DEAT. More whiners about BOO-EFFING-HOO, when/if NS2 ever comes out, they're not paying money because of a single high-profile miscommunication among the mods and [violent]. Twits. I mess up their forum access. In any other game, the mods would be catching even more crap because they aren't permitted to just... silence... the rabblerousers. Thank goodness the bastard mods of Nationstates can greatly reduce the amount of BS we get because of tactical bastardly actions. Yup! Because our frequent removal of 'problem players', we hardly catch ANY flak.

I feel my headache subsiding already! I dig a bit deeper, and for kicks delete any nations found to be communicating with those guys I axed. Giggling wickedly, I let the modbombs rain like the wrath of heaven! Oh man, I'm GOOD.

Feeling almost as good as new, I check the tasklist, delete a bunch of UN multies, eject a bunch of Indian Ocean UN members out of the UN, and rename The Indian Ocean Army region to "The Wanking Whiners". To make it seem less BIASED (heaven forbid!), I also rename a bunch of other regions. A region reknown for being a haven for UN multies (and currently void of any UN members thanks to my last sweep!) becomes "The Retarded Realms", a roleplaying region gets renamed to "Happy Fantasy Pleasureland".

Satisfied that I have rained terror and modly wrath upon the foolish players who made my headache worse, I log off and go back to bed.

Hey, being evil makes me feel better emotionally, but physically I still feel like sh--!

To Be Continued...

((OOC DISCLAIMER/CRANKY MODERATOR RANT: Yes, this one is absolutely OOZING with sarcasm, and to be quite frank, if I could get away with some of that stuff mentioned in that post right now, I think I would. But I won't, because I know better! I'm overtired, cranky, have a splitting headache, have had less than 10 hours of sleep out of the past 120 hours, and unlike my Bastard Moderator from Hell counterpart, I'm still worrying about that damned brushfire! Think of me what you will, but I don't give a care if a bunch of people are overreacting to what was essentially a miscommunication between the mods and [violet]. These things happen, and frag it all, it's ONLY A GAME! You guys with an axe to grind, get over yourselves and your annoying little crusade. The mods are only human, if we eff up, report us to [violet], instead of trying to deliberately provoke the mods and just piss us all off! THAT falls under that whole harassment thing, and will get you into trouble. Reporting transgressions, whether real or (more often than not) imagined, will likely earn you better results! [END RANT].))

On another subject entirely...

*fires the Threadsplitter missile at the thread*
http://rpstudios.ian-justman.com/junk/CGgoods/threadsplit.JPG

The Bastard NS Player from HELL!
http://www.nationstates.net/forum/viewtopic.php?t=86823

It was starting to get rather cluttered, with bastard mods and bastard players all writing stories :wink:

Uh-huh...
Rep, I think someone would have to be pretty darn stupid to miss the sarcasm and irritation in the above post. Despite that, it is perfectly understandable and frankly rather amusing.

This thread does seem to be a good place for the Mods to get things off their chests in a way that doesn't involve actually DEATing any of the idiots giving them grief. Heh... the mod-bombing on that one would have been funny to watch, though. :D

This is not a tag. I am not just posting here because my other post got split. Honest.

&lt;TAG&gt;

One day I will sit and read the whole thing. Now I'm off to school.

The Bastard NS Moderator from HELL- Vol. 14

I sit at my desk and log into my nation. Ah... the United Kingdom of Sirroco, how sweet those words sound... founder, and master of the region of La-

I squinted and looked at the screen to see if my eyes were decieving me, but no: My region had been renamed 'Wancre'. It's that Reploid Seductions, I just know it!

Right then, NO one's going to be a bigger bastard moderator than me! Maybe I'll use that little program that SilliusSuckUppus showed me... what a geek. He has more powers than me for crying out loud! Heh... he can wait...

{mji[$~~euhiw]

>
iwdi

[&quot;$^= Complicated weird code stuff]owo['s's'`]=24]

*click!*

Accessing nation...

Alright... that's Reploid Seduction's password changed, her name has been changed to The Intergrated N00BLANDS of Reploid Seductions and the region deleted. Ooh, brackets! OK, that's her forum banned too...

Back to Sirroco! Now to watch for the fun! I sip fom a carton of low-grade orange juice and rock in my chair. Ah, time of my life! Wonder what's in my telegrams?

Recieved three hours ago: I'd like you to support my UN propos

I don't bother to read the rest. *click!* It's gone! Small request in the evil lair and *click* nation gone! Hey hey! Next one down:

y was my nation deleted. It was called 'Jewsrghey'. Please tell me y! :(

I shake my head sadly and reply:

We think you stink. Stop playing NS, it's making the site look bad.

Meh, I'm sure Tactful Grease would have put it differently, but who cares!? I outrank him by five whole hours!

Submit, *click*

Bored, I logout and play minesweeper for a couple of hours.

--Sirroco, the forum moderator from Wa- HELL!--

Ahh, if only Sirroco knew the truth. But now that my program has been run I have full access to his nation . . .

SilliusSuckUppus
The Bastard NS Modling from Hell

Ahh, if only Sirroco knew the truth. But now that my program has been fun I have full access to his nation . . .

SilliusSuckUppus
The Bastard NS Modling from Hell

Fun for who?

Groutergunchia
The Bastard NS Spellchecker from Hell

excellent, yesssssssssss

excellent, yesssssssssss

Okay...carm it down Kermit!