Billco Co. Presents... The Jukebox Charts! [Archive] - Page 2

The SLAGLands

07-01-2004, 00:13

THE JUKEBOX CHARTS!
Week 11 Sales:
1. Monaa - No Need To Cry, No Reason To Smile
LAST WEEK: n/a
2. The Trapeze Accidents - Lords of the Ring--Live!
LAST WEEK: #1
3. Crimson Sedition - Granite Reflection
LAST WEEK: #3
4. Green Machine - Soylent Green
LAST WEEK: #5
5. Youthanasia - The Money Will Roll Right In
LAST WEEK: #4
6. Kamikaze - Harry Chapin--The Album
LAST WEEK: #2
7. Hollow Point - Jacketted
LAST WEEK: n/a
8. SOVIET ANGER FORCE UNION - ANGER+FORCE=SOVIET
LAST WEEK: #9
9. Grande Pedro Perro G - Burrito Fuels Mi Corazon
LAST WEEK: n/a
10. Dead Lamas - Sell Out and S*** Me, B*****s
LAST WEEK: n/a
11. The Explodinators - The Yellow Album
LAST WEEK: #8
12. Nine-Second Tractor - NOS Plowin'
LAST WEEK: #11
13. Three Word Name - Stop the Pop!
LAST WEEK: #7
14. The Federation First Army Military Orchestra and Chorus - Introductions and Farewells
LAST WEEK: #16
15. Preventer Five - Five Wars and a Revolution
LAST WEEK: #10
16. Monaa - It Could Have Been Worse
LAST WEEK: #19
17. Kamikaze - Nautilus
LAST WEEK: #14
18. Mad Kid Disease - Beware of Child
LAST WEEK: #15
19. Method to Madness - The Damned
LAST WEEK: #18
20. The Federation First Army Military Orchestra and Chorus - A Sentient Christmas
LAST WEEK: #2

COMMENTS: Talk about a big break! Monaa, who has been a mainstay on the Jukes ever since they opened their doors to international bands, tops The Trapeze Accidents in their debut week, marking their first time with a #1 album in the history of the charts and, in fact, nearly topping the first-week album sales record previously set by Elisabeth Wyrk's classic The Old Man from Rocky Top and Other Musings. Look for Green Machine or even Crimson Sedition to vie for the top spot in the weeks to come!

1. Monaa - "See the Light"
LAST WEEK: n/a
2. CDH - "Love's Burning a Hole in My Pocket"
LAST WEEK: #3
3. Crimson Sedition - "Blind Guardian of No More"
LAST WEEK: #1
4. Grande Pedro Perro G - "Grande Pedro Perro G"
LAST WEEK: n/a
5. Hollow Point - "Breaking the Illusion"
LAST WEEK: n/a
6. Youthanasia - "Tracy the Class Whore"
LAST WEEK: #2
7. Kamikaze - "The Rock"
LAST WEEK: #4
8. Mad Kid Disease - "The McSong"
LAST WEEK: #7
9. Three Word Name - "No Difference"
LAST WEEK: #9
10. The Trapeze Accidents - "Shoulder"
LAST WEEK: #8
11. Method to Madness - "Golgotha Tenement Blues"
LAST WEEK: #11
12. The Explodinators - "Smells Like Homer Spirit"
LAST WEEK: #12
13. Day Mascus - "Uh... Hey"
LAST WEEK: #15
14. Youthanasia - "Viminy"
LAST WEEK: #10
15. Nine-Second Tractor - "The Shanty"
LAST WEEK: #13
16. Green Machine - "Soylent Green"
LAST WEEK: #19
17. SOVIET ANGER FORCE UNION - "Dark Flow"
LAST WEEK: #17
18. Preventer Five - "Operation Meteor"
LAST WEEK: #14
19. Kamikaze - "Cats In The Cradle"
LAST WEEK: #20
20. Dead Lamas - "Melkor's Holiday Camp for Elves"
LAST WEEK: n/a

COMMENTS: There's a new king of the Jukebox Charts, and it's Kaze Progressa's favorite children, Monaa! Taking the #1 spot from both charts for one of only 10 incidents in the history of the Billco Company, Monaa continues to light up airwaves and store shelves across The SLAGLands and the world! CDH is still enjoying a bout of popularity, while rather disconcerting is Dead Lamas' highly controversial single managing to chart this week--perhaps out of morbid curiosity or perhaps out of a strange rise in poularity in SLAGLandic anti-Sirithilists.

Amerigo

07-01-2004, 01:31

RADIO ADVERT for Burrito Fuels Mi Corazon
"Yo yo yo, it's me Grande Pedro Perro G, and I's here to tell joo foos all to go buy mi nuevo album, Burrito Fuels Mi Corazon. Ya know cause its real tight, yo. There joo got da hit single "Grande Perro Pedro G"... I mean go but dis <<bleep>>

Distant Male Voice: "You can't say that!"

"Que? What joo talkin' about foo? I say any f<<bleep>> I <<bleep>>in want to say, g! Don't be no tellin' me yo no puedo... (cut off)

Burrito Fuels Mi Corazon in stores now!

Live Radio Interview on K-SHIZZLE Radio, Amerigo

DJ Toby Quak Quak: Yo, what up fools, I got da newest shiznit in da studio... Dis here is my man Grande Pedro Perro G...

GPPG: Yo man.

DJTQQ: You got some success wid yo newest album, foo. What ya gonna do wid all da bling bling?

GPPG: Is for mi chicos... My homies yo...

DJTQQ: Wow... thats really generous of ya... This guy's got heart you know... So you're gonna just go over to them and give it as a gift, man?

GPPG: Give it to them? No they in jail, man... This for they bail, man.

DJTQQ: Oh. Still very generous.

GPPG: Yeah man, they said they go kill me when they get out if I don't my debts man.

DJTQQ: Oh... Well, anyways, you got some real phat shiznit on your new album. How'd ya manage to come up with these phat lyrics?

GPPG: Well you know I be keepin' it down wid da street homies yo and all dat sh<bleep> I be da real thing yo...

DJTQQ: Oh... Right.

GPPG: Oh yeah, joo peoples listenin' to eso. You be buyin' me album comprende? I still need more dinero...

DJTQQ: Er... right... Let's take some calls.

CALLER: Hi, I've downloaded your song and I wanna know the name of the album so I could buy it...

DJTQQ: Well the album again is...

GPPG: Que? Who joo think joo are motha<bleep>? Joo think joo can get away wid dis o i-go-buy-it after smaple yo? Not on my sh<bleep>! Where da f<bleep> joo live? I kill joo ass! I go track joo lazy americano ass down and kill joo madre! I go fu<bleep>> find joo casa I set it on fire, bitch! Who da F<bleep> joo think joo are? I go f<bleep> kill joo!

CALLER: ...

DJTQQ: Next call!

CALLER: Pedro? Is that you Pedro? Pedro! Joo promise go come home by ten...

GPPG: Oh mama! No esta tiempo para eso! Despues eso shit... Okay mama?

CALLER: Don't joo curse at tu madre! Cuando tu regresas a casa, yo...

DJTQQ: Next caller!

GPPG: Sorry, man I gots to get my sh<bleep> and go home man.

DJTQQ: ...

The SLAGLands

07-01-2004, 20:06

Just in time for 2004, The Billco Company is pleased to announce the release of You Heard It Here First, Volume XV! For the past decade-and-a-half, the You Heard It Here First compilation has been a compendium of chart-topping hits spanning an entire year and has featured such past greats as The Trapeze Accidents, Delphi Jones, and Cheaper in Bulk! YHIHF XV reviews the great hit singles from 2003, the year in which The Jukes opened their doors to the international scene, making this our best compilation to date!

Also, purchase early to get your shot at the limited edition enhanced CD, featuring band interviews, a Year in Review video, and exclusive live performances by The Greansleaves, Day Mascus, Lazarus Calling, and more! Get yours today!

(* denotes Reviewer's Choice with a nice OOC twist: these are my personal favorite songs that I've seen on the Jukes. Don't feel snubbed if you don't get one--you all should feel proud for making this list in the first place.)

1. Sierra Schweet - "Watch Me Bounce"
2. Testiclisation - "Rock Your Body"
3. SOVIET ANGER FORCE UNION - "Dark Flow"
*4. CDH - "Love's Burning a Hole in My Pocket"
5. Mad Kid Disease - "The McSong"
*6. Monaa - "Because They Hate Me (Why Me?)"
7. Kamikaze - "Cats In The Cradle"
8. Crimson Sedition - "Blind Guardian of No More"
*9. The Trapeze Accidents - "Lemur"
10. Youthanasia - "Viminy"
11. Korba Asha-Corrino - "Closer"
12. Method to Madness - "Golgotha Tenement Blues"
13. The Little Homies - "Uuuh Yeah Baby"
14. Nine-Second Tractor - "The Shanty"
15. My Favorite Band - "How Many Heads on a Hydra"
16. Gandulf and the Head Trip - "Hassan I Shabah"
17. Punted Eddies - "For Trium"
*18. Kaosu no Tenshi - "To Fly Once More"

CRITICAL COMMENTS: By far the most strange in the collection thus far, You Heard It Here First, Volume XV is precisely what you'd expect: a list of the prominent singles from 2003. The opening of The SLAGLandic music market to the world this past year provides a few interesting changes, most notably in the rich cultures that intertwine on this album. It's certainl strange to hear Crimson Sedition's brooding "Blind Guardian of No More" cozying up in between Kamikaze's heartfelt redux of "Cats in the Cradle" and The Trapeze Accidents joyous pop-rocker "Lemur," but the album displays some definite high points. Flukes like Sierra Schweet's "Watch Me Bounce," Nine-Second Tractor's "The Shanty," and Korba Asha-Corrino's not-really-THAT-controversial cover of Nine Inch Nails' "Closer" provide a tone for a year in which artists rose and faded at breakneck speed. However, rookies of the year Crimson Sedition, Youthanasia, and Monaa, along with the beautiful chart-topping closer "To Fly Once More," make this a must for fans of good pop music.

Amerigo

08-01-2004, 00:48

Crimson Sedition is announcing the Xtra .75 Million Thwaks (500K USD) Contest give away. 10 CDs have been shipped to stores internationally with the never before heard Bonus song. Those who find those Cds each win half a million US dollars.

The bonus song is completely instrumental and entitled "Titanium Razor".

Proof of purchase is required. This contest will recieve no airway on neither radio nor television. However, it is announced on Crimson Sedition's official website.

300 more CDs are sold worldwide with 75 Thwak (50 USD) cash.

The SLAGLands

08-01-2004, 07:50

The Trapeze Accidents are pleased to announce the release of The Orion EP, a brand-new single from their upcoming LP release, Ballpark Figure! "Orion," the lead-off single from this album, is an unusual turn for The Accidents and reflects a new direction for the band. The song, a reflection on a lifelong friend of Rede Cornucopia who died when she was 19 years old, is a bittersweet recollection of the joys of lifelong love and the sorrow, anger, and even terror that comes with loss.

Ballpark Figure will be released in short order; for now, though, Accidents fans can whet their whistles on this all-new single. Enjoy!

The Orion EP:
1. Orion
2. Good Old Neon (acoustic version)
3. Fade to Black (And Other Clichès That Howl in the Night)
4. Where I Hang My Knickers
5. Shoulder - Live in Bauxine - 12-11-2XXX

LYRICS:
You were six
You traced Orion in the freckles on my face
I was four
You were a Scorpio--an endless, futile chase
Through the black
In dotted circles through a Lite-Brite August sky
Through the blue
The day the river pulled you down
Now you fly

Through the sky
Through Orion
Spinning deep congruent circles
And I trace
And I face them
When azure drops into black
Toast the sky
Toast Orion
"Here's to you, the moon-dipped hunter."
And I sigh
And you fly off
When the belt won't send you back

You were young
Beneath Orion when you moved your hands across
I was bare
The sweat like dewdrops on my breast in starbeam gloss
And I felt
I screamed "I need you" to the tattered prom dress sky
And I dreamed
The night I swear I saw you drown
Now you fly

Through the sky
Through Orion
Spinning deep congruent circles
And I trace
And I face them
When azure drops into black
Toast the sky
Toast Orion
"Here's to you, the moon-dipped hunter."
And I sigh
And you fly off
When the belt won't send you back

Evening falls...
In everlasting vigil
Connect-the-dots Orion, hear my calls
I never was much for prayers
And I took what I was given
I never asked for one more chance
And I ate what I received
But I reached
Oh, God, I reached for him
The day the river took him
You took him...
You took him...
You bastard... give him back...

Me in black
I traced Orion in the freckles on my face
You in blue
The coffin empty from an endless, futile chase
Through the blue
A rock sepulchre in an empty cloudburst sky
Through the black
The day you flew not up, but down
Now you fly

Through the sky
Through Orion
Every night, the same white circles
And I trace
And I face them
The azure against the black
Rip the sky
Rip down Orion
"One more chance, you greedy bastard!"
And I sigh
And you fly off
On our star, I wish you back

And it's not your fault, Orion
Nothing else can bring him back

13-01-2004, 19:26

"Holy Monkey Dung, Dude!!! That concert rocked! I was a passive fan of Cold Dead Hands(CDH) as most music reviewers are of the good bands. But I am totally in shock, dude. They played a lot of songs from their first album and then of course their smash hit "Love's Burning a Hole in My Pocket." I thought the crowd was gonna tear the building apart when they announced they were gonna sing "Never Tired of Crying." They finished up with their signature song "Cold Dead Hands" and then were called back for 3 encores! I stayed for everything, dude.

I also want to throw a shout out to the Empire of Treznor for providing such magnificent staging and excellently subtle security. With props to the city of Devonton for fantastic fans!"
-Johny B. Rad Rock My World Magazine

13-01-2004, 19:27

OOC: Can I just say it's funny that CDH has had "Love's" at the top of the playing charts for 3 weeks but hasn't even broken onto the sales charts. :)

IC:
Days before their unprecedented Tour of Nations, CDH releases a brand new album!! The title song, "Never Tired of Crying" takes an interesting twist to standard music. The lyrics are seperated by instrumental accompanied by Marqus' humming of the melody. The tone of the music changes with each verse--and there are many-- and the first part of the song is worded entirely differently from the last part. However, as only CDH can do it, the message pulls it all together into a beautiful soft tribute to the joy and pain of life. So without further adeau:

Album: Never Tired of Crying
Songs:
Never Tired of Crying
The Sound of Water
Hell on Wheels
Party
Soft Light
Orange Balloons
Breaking the Sound Barrier

Title Song: Never Tired of Crying
(musical intro with Marqus humming the melody)
He was a hamster I had in third grade;
I left the lid off, he got out, now he’s dead.
It was a monster truck I got for Christmas;
I’d wanted it all year long, it sat there among my gifts.
The tree in front of Scotty’s house was tall.
We climbed, the branch broke and down I fell.

I never get tired of crying
over broken toys, really big bruises
or loved ones dying.
Life has pain and clouds and rain
and tears wash out the hurt.
I kneel in the mud, as the drops pour down
my own crying soaking into the dirt.

(musical interlude with Marqus humming the melody)
She saw more in me than anyone else
she loved me more than I loved myself.
After two years she returned my heart to the shelf.
I never get tired of crying.

She’d battled despair and a failing lung
At her funeral her memorial I sung
Within a year she took my father along.
I never get tired of crying.

She stood by my side all dressed in white
so radiant and beautiful in the early twilight
We danced under the stars on our wedding night.
I never get tired of crying.

He decided to come on the twenty-first
His head got stuck and I was afraid it would burst
His little heart faltered, his lungs weak at birth.
I never get tired of crying.

(musical bridge with Marqus humming)
I lay here now with my family around,
waiting for the death bell to sound,
knowing soon I’ll be deep in the ground.
I lay here happily crying.

My life’s been full of love and joy
I look at the face of my son’s new boy
And even as I’m dying,
I hope he learns
to never get tired of crying.
(musical finale with Marqus humming then the instruments cut out and Marqus hums the last few measures alone)

Amerigo

17-01-2004, 04:07

Crimson Sedition plans an All-Amerigan Benifit Tour (proceeds go to badly underfunded ophranages of the outer islands of the Empire):

Jan. 23--Memorial Stadium, Liasa
Jan. 25--Glorious Stadium of Amerigo, Borleone (capital)
Jan. 26--Garibaldi Memorial Hall, Seyalla
Jan. 27--Battle of Bloodwash Memorial Stadium, Mystera
Jan. 29--Gerios Field, Gerios Island
Feb. 1--Geshol Hall, Berios Island
Feb. 5--Salamander Hall of Music, Equatoria Island
Feb. 7--Deurdek Multi--Purpose Hall, Aesenia Isle
Feb. 9--Belliasa (makeshift) Stage, Savagia Isle
Feb. 11--Chasteos Stadium, North Slapclad Island
Feb. 15--Lucky Mule Hotel and Casino, Greater Omintro
Feb. 18--Industro--Stadium, West Borleone (capital again)
Feb. 19--Balcony (7th floor) of Corporate International Cultural and Entertainment for the People Headquarters (fully federal building), Downtown Borleone (capital again) [free admission... obviously]

In other news, it is rumored that media giant Amerigan International seeks to buy Damnable Records.

17-01-2004, 06:04

Waughslind's new rising stars, a four-man band known as Kings In A Gutter, has just released their fourth single, I'm Swell (Hell, It's All Well), the third track from their album What!?.

Band Name: Kings In A Gutter
Members: John "Blueflagger" Llewell, vocals; Megan "Pipes" Llewell, vocals/flute; James "Gun" White, drums; Kevin "Womp" Bowen, guitar/strings
Background: Blueflagger has been singing since he was ten. He met Pipes at fifteen, and quickly discovered that his voice, a melodic tenor, blended wonderfully with hers. They married three weeks ago.
Gun White first discovered drums in his middle school band in Cheese Biscuit, Breadbasket. His throbbing riffs evoke fire, demonic spirits, and kittens. Yes, oddly enough, kittens. Don't think they're not evil, too!
Womp Bowen is a master of all stringed instruments. He plays the violin, bass, and guitar on I'm Swell.
The band met in freshman year of college.
Album: What!?
Genre: Post-punk punk
Label: Jot Records
Song: I'm Swell

Lyrics:
The people that I like the best are already taken,
Relationships that I like are constantly breakin',
Sometimes I kinda wonder if I really love Megan, (Hey!)

But then I say...
Hell! It's all well!
No need to sound the death knell,
Ever since the Fortress fell,
I'm swell.

The things I take for granted fall to fadin',
In a little bit 'a conversation I'm always wadin',
If I was a teacher, well, I'd be on-the-curve gradin',

But then I say...
Hell! It's all well!
No need to sound the death knell,
Ever since the Fortress fell,
I'm swell.

Ahhh... Hell! Hell! Hell! Hell! Hell! Hell! Hell!

But then I say,
Hell, it's all well!
No need to sound the death knell,
Ever since that damn Fortress fell,
I'm swell.

Daistallia

17-01-2004, 12:37

World Tour Press Realease:
The dead Lamas announces the commencement of their Michael Jackson Rent a Brat Tour, featuring Paedophiles for Buddha (and 3 more bands with names too offensive to post). Many our dates are still open at the moment. Lead singer Milarapist, cornered by reporters while taking a break at the Rush Limbaugn Home for Delenquent Children, had this to say about the upcoming tour: "We're f***ing happy as f***ing larks in a (deleted, deleted, deleted). Now, f*** off you (deleted, deleted, deleted, deleted, deleted) twit, before I (deleted, deleted, deleted, deleted) your (deleted, deleted, deleted)!"

Kaze Progressa

17-01-2004, 13:50

The band of the moment, Monaa, have declared in an interview that they would enjoy collaborations with other artists.

'In particular,' said Davae Hawl, 'the Trapeze Accidents... or if the two bands were a bit big to link together, perhaps Rede and Kata could perform together. Now THAT would be brilliant - I can imagine those two harmonising really well...'.

Speaking for radio station K-Sound, Davae added the current success is 'blinding... some say you have to see it to believe it, but we can't see for all the mayhem surrounding it.' Their album No Reason To Cry, No Reason To Smile broke first-week sales records for international artists and already looks set to be one of the biggest-selling albums of 2004. 'Don't say that yet!' added Davae, on hearing this.

Imitora

17-01-2004, 21:22

Current number one on the Imitoran charts are local alternative type rockers Lostprophets. The populace looks forward to their next album comming out early next February. Their last album, The Fake Sounds of Progress, was the sleeper hit of 2000. They have released two singles from their upcomming album, "Ride" and "Last Train".

17-01-2004, 23:08

BAND NAME: Suite Meets
MEMBERS (and instruments): Kenneth "Baggage" LeFritz, keyboard & vocals; Vincent "Beet Man" St. Piper, drums & accordion; Sir Charles "Strumpet" Degong Von Hilderbuns IV, lead guitar, bass guitar, lyre
BAND AGE: Fresh off the assembly line - er, I mean they've been playing in a Seattle Garage for roughly six years
RECORD LABEL: Whatever Sells, Ltd.
GENRE: Classic New-age, alterna-industrial thrash-pop.
PAST ALBUMS: -
PAST SINGLES: -
BAND HISTORY:
"I found these boys penniless and addicted to smack, doing anything to get their next fix, with nothing but the shirts on their back and their instruments. They were leaving the real Rock & Roll life. The hard life.
I saw em do a gig at the Sweat Hole back in '01 and I thought, 'Murray, those kids got somethin!' I signed em up that night and went right to work smoothing the edges on their music and preparing them for rock stardom. We're very pleased that they've kicked the junk and everyone here's really excited to see how fast they take off!" -Murray Sinclair, VP Whatever Sells, Ltd.
"Vee are riding in ze Los Ahngelez tour bus, und zis man comez up to us und say, 'Hey, boyz, do you want to be in a Rock und Roll band?' Vee tell him, vee do not know how to play any of ze instruments, und he say, 'Not a problem. You are good-looking boyz!' Vee tought he vas crazy, but two monts later, vee are on stage, and he is saying 'Just pretend to sing and play!' So vee do." - Ken LeFritz

ALBUM NAME: Modern Mythology... Music!
TRACK LIST:
Path of a Broken Heart
Love You, Love You, Baby
Eat my Death
Don't Leash (Unleash)
Snap and Crackle
Fist Whipping
Let Me Hear You (Rocket)
Why Does He Keep Giving Us Money?
Material Girl (Madonna cover)
Just a Hint of Lyme
Thank You and Goodnight (Suck Muffin remix)

CRITICAL COMMENTS:
"Oh, it's hot, baby! Hotter than hot! It's white-hot! We've got that flash music lost with the death of disco, but we keep that edgy flavor kids today love. This band's got ultra style and truly inspired hits. Personally, I don't foresee an end to their career." -Murray Sinclair, VP Whatever Sells, Ltd.
"Garbage. Complete Trash." -Steve Gibsonson, Assistant Editor, Simple Tunes Magazine

SINGLE NAME: Let Me Hear You (Rocket)
LYRICS:
So you say your old man is givin you the blues
Rocket, Rocket
Let me hear ya rock it if you wanna be in his shoes!
Rocket, Rocket
Say, "Hey there, Pops, things ain't gonna be the same!"
Rocket, Rocket
Let me hear ya rock it if you gonna change the game!
Rocket, Rocket

18-01-2004, 09:52

Kings in A Gutter has hit #1 for their single I'm Swell as well as their album What!?. They are currently on tour in Waughslind.

May 1: Cackalackie Ampitheater, Cackalackie, Sandlands
May 3: Hokitoki Cultural Center, Hokitoki, Sandlands
May 5: Garnh Mallinkt Community Auditorium, Bikanel, Sandlands
May 8: Skateracer Park, Waugh City, Breadbasket
May 10: Lowvibe, Cheese Biscuit, Breadbasket
May 15: Waughslind Diplomatic Academy (Special Show), Fortresslands

Gun is currently in advanced schooling at the WDA, and will therefore be replaced by Harrison Mallinkt for this tour.

Amerigo

18-01-2004, 11:09

Amerigan Music News:

(Amerigo)--Grande Pedro Perro G, has after a long and arduous arguement, has convinced Records4Less Inc. to recall all copies of Burrito Fuels Mi Corazon, because as he stated,

"I'm changin' my name foos. Cause I dimecuenta... que se dice... realize... yeah, foos... my name is too long and shit, sos I jus' gotta change it up and yo. Yeah, and if I's go y recall eso, then the first one get real rares and sh..."

Due to this turn of events, Records4Less will take the time to "enhanse" the album.

"We'll be adding bloopy sounds," says David G. Spenser, Grande Pedro Perro G's manager, "Because its obviously the grooviest thing out there man... so freakin' far out... yo."

The new album re-released with "bloopy sounds" will still be titled Burrito Fuels Mi Corazon, only this time it is by Sangre De Derramamiento (which ironically is a longer name than Grande Pedro Perro G).

19-01-2004, 05:48

A new release from Kings In A Gutter has already risen to the top of the Waughslind charts.

SONG: Hardly Worth Mentioning
ALBUM: What!?

"It's just a nip and a tuck!
It's just a cardboard-tube... f***!
It's just a U-V tanning bed!
It's just an image in your... head!

*slap of the special drum*

And it is hardly worth mentioning!
And it is not a great big deal!
When a melting-pot celebrity!
Only wants to cop a feel!

It's just a... low-grade movie.
It's just a... little groovy.
It's just a tabloid tale.
It's just a madman's rail.

*thump*

And it is hardly worth mentioning!
And it is not a great big deal!
When a melting-pot celebrity!
Only wants to cop a feel!"

The SLAGLands

23-01-2004, 19:19

THE JUKEBOX CHARTS!
Week 12 Sales:
1. CDH - Never Tired of Crying
LAST WEEK: n/a
2. Monaa - No Need To Cry, No Reason To Smile
LAST WEEK: #1
3. Kings in a Gutter - What!?
LAST WEEK: n/a
4. Various Artists - You Heard It Here First Volume XV
LAST WEEK: n/a
5. Crimson Sedition - Granite Reflection
LAST WEEK: #3
6. Suite Meets - Modern Mythology... Music!
LAST WEEK: n/a
7. The Trapeze Accidents - Lords of the Ring--Live!
LAST WEEK: #2
8. Dead Lamas - Sell Out and S*** Me, B*****s
LAST WEEK: #10
9. Sangre De Derramamiento - Burrito Fuels Mi Corazon
LAST WEEK: #9
10. Green Machine - Soylent Green
LAST WEEK: #4
11. Youthanasia - The Money Will Roll Right In
LAST WEEK: #5
12. Hollow Point - Jacketted
LAST WEEK: #7
13. The Explodinators - The Yellow Album
LAST WEEK: #11
14. Three Word Name - Stop the Pop!
LAST WEEK: #13
15. SOVIET ANGER FORCE UNION - ANGER+FORCE=SOVIET
LAST WEEK: #8
16. Kamikaze - Harry Chapin--The Album
LAST WEEK: #6
17. Preventer Five - Five Wars and a Revolution
LAST WEEK: #15
18. Nine-Second Tractor - NOS Plowin'
LAST WEEK: #12
19. The Federation First Army Military Orchestra and Chorus - Introductions and Farewells
LAST WEEK: #14
20. Mad Kid Disease - Beware of Child
LAST WEEK: #18

COMMENTS: Just when you think a band has a stranglehold on the top spot, a new king takes the throne! CDH reenters the charts with a shocking #1 debut! Kings in a Gutter have been receiving a great deal of press on the independent scene, and word of mouth may put this band on the top next week!

1. The Trapeze Accidents - "Orion"
LAST WEEK: n/a
2. CDH - "Never Tired of Crying"
LAST WEEK: n/a
3. Monaa - "See the Light"
LAST WEEK: #1
4. Suite Meets - "Let Me Hear You (Rocket)"
LAST WEEK: n/a
5. Sangre De Derramamient - "Grande Pedro Perro G"
LAST WEEK: #4
6. Kings in a Gutter - "I'm Swell"
LAST WEEK: n/a
7. Crimson Sedition - "Blind Guardian of No More"
LAST WEEK: #3
8. Hollow Point - "Breaking the Illusion"
LAST WEEK: #5
9. CDH - "Love's Burning a Hole in My Pocket"
LAST WEEK: #2
10. Youthanasia - "Tracy the Class Whore"
LAST WEEK: #6
11. Three Word Name - "No Difference"
LAST WEEK: #9
12. Kamikaze - "The Rock"
LAST WEEK: #7
13. The Trapeze Accidents - "Shoulder"
LAST WEEK: #10
14. Mad Kid Disease - "The McSong"
LAST WEEK: #8
15. Nine-Second Tractor - "The Shanty"
LAST WEEK: #15
16. The Explodinators - "Smells Like Homer Spirit"
LAST WEEK: #12
17. Day Mascus - "Uh... Hey"
LAST WEEK: #13
18. Method to Madness - "Golgotha Tenement Blues"
LAST WEEK: #11
19. SOVIET ANGER FORCE UNION - "Dark Flow"
LAST WEEK: #17
20. Dead Lamas - "Melkor's Holiday Camp for Elves"
LAST WEEK: #20

COMMENTS: The top of the charts has degraded into an utter cat fight between arguably the world's three biggest bands: CDH, Monaa, and the Trapeze Accidents! Expect this to heat up with the release of the Accidents' new album, Ballpark Figure, next week! Keep an eye out for hot new act Suite Meets, who are developing a strong following on the club scene!

Amerigo

24-01-2004, 03:15

Damnable Records has now been purchased by the multimedia giant Amerigo International for 28 billion thwaks (.7 thwack to a dollar). In an effort, on Amerigan International's part, to cash in on the band Crimson Sedition. The members of Crimson Sedition are quite unhappy regarding this purchase and there have been implications that when hteir contract if fulfilled, they will sign with a new record label. Vocals, Grimm says that they are not very comfortable "...being owned by a corporation that has heavy ties with the corrupt elements of the Amerigan government."

With the recent "detente of media and entertainment" in Amerigo, much scensorship has been removed, and recently there has been shaky evidence that Amerigo International has government office holders in the highest ranks of the Amerigan Department of Entertainment and Media, which as a Borleone Times article claimed, "...aid in a virtual monopolization of the entertainmnet."

The government has yet to break up a monopoly, however it has never been found to be supporting a certain monopoly, "...until now." the Borleone Times article asserted.

Amerigo International commented only by saying that, "...all allegations of such mideeds are vicious lies, spread by our competitors."

In other news, it is cofirmed for sure that Crimson Sedition is working on its new album, which as of now has no title. Little has yet been said about it, except a brief confirmation on Crimson Sedition's official website.

Amerigo

24-01-2004, 03:16

The SLAGLands

27-01-2004, 19:18

I Can't Believe They're Not Records is at long last proud to announce the release of a brand-new studio album from The Trapeze Accidents, Ballpark Figure. The album features the Accidents at their most stripped-down in years and features the gorgeous meditation of Rede Cornucopia in this, the most difficult time in her life.

During their tour of Titan, Rede began complaining of pains in her chest, and she secretly checked into the Athens Hospital just after the band's last show on the tour. X-rays revealed a tumor in Rede's left breast, and later tests upon the band's return to The SLAGLands confirmed that it was malignant. For this reason, the Accidents will be unable to support the album on tour or to produce a video for the album's first single, "Orion."

Our thoughts and prayers go out to our good friends, The Trapeze Accidents, in their time of need, and we send our best wishes to the entire Cornucopia family.

*1. Headliner (f. Day Mascus)
2. Quite the Contrary
*3. Orion
4. Last Days of Disco
5. Aspirin Deep
6. Cast Iron
7. Get in Line
8. (Give Me) These Six Seconds
9. Driveaway
*10. Evercreek Boulevard
11. Where I Hang My Knickers
*12. Porch (yesterday, 5 a.m., you, me, raspberry wine, a whole hell of a lot of nothing to do, and a whole hell of a lot of time in which to do it)

CRITICAL COMMENTS: It's easy to hear it from the first moment Jane B. Jane's haunting minor key cello glides to forefront in the opening moments of Ballpark Figure: this is not the same band that put out last year's smash The Trapeze Accidents... Depants'd. Every song features a dim and chilling tone, with all electronic instruments abandoned. Here acoustic guitars replace Warner's traditional grinding howl, pipe organ and piano replace Santos L. Halper's poppy synthesizer, and Rede Cornucopia's joyous alto has become deep and pensive. One may find it easy to write this album off as a mere harkening back to the days of How to Smoke a Post-Industrial Fag, but whereas that album shot for epic concert-hall scale, Figure is content to sit in the garage and strum, allowing the gifts of its musicians to come to the forefront rather than the grandeur of its production.

In large part, it works in the Accidents' favor. Even in the stripped-down motif, the intensity of the band comes to the forefront, particularly in lead-off single "Orion," which features Rede Cornucopia's most personal lyrics since "Billboard Dreams." And indeed, more than any other album in Accidents history, this is about Rede. We see her wandering far from her home ("Where I Hang My Knickers," "Driveaway"), chatting it up with her fans ("Get in Line"), playing the club scene in the early days of her career ("Quite the Contrary"), and even losing her virginity ("Orion"). Rede does not provide lead vocals on only two of the album's tracks: Santos's piano-and-cello-only cover of Yo La Tengo's "Last Days of Disco" (a surprisingly weak rendition from a normally sound cover band) and one of the album's many highlights, "Headliner," which features stoner/acoustic rocker Day Mascus on vocals.

While it may seem odd to see so much of Rede on an album led off by a guest vocalist, the liner notes provide a startling truth about the album. As Warner writes, "This was the most difficult album we've ever produced. We've tried to keep Rede's cancer out of the public eye, but there's really no way we can do that anymore. I love my sister, and I know she's strong enough to overcome this." Indeed, at the same time the album was released, a press release revealed that Rede Cornucopia had been diagnosed with breast cancer this past summer. In place of a tour, Rede will spend the next few months in chemotherapy.

It's certainly an insight that puts Ballpark Figure into a whole new light. Rede sees the end approaching, and rather than looking onto it with fear, she chooses to do what she loves best: write and sing. And while she's lost friends, left her home, and suffered the most terrible of tragedies, she still finds time to smile. We see it first on the smiling prophecy of "Evercreek Boulevard," a piano-driven number that sees Rede at home with a child. She sings with an exhausted sigh: "Settle down/Lay the thunder at the doorstep/Take my daughter to the park/Sitting down won't be so hard" and "Winding down/Taste the stew that's on the stovetop/Buy a house with a garage/On Evercreek Boulevard." And we see it finally in the album's closing number, "Porch," which sees Rede not fighting pain or tumbling topsy-turvy through fame, but sitting, relaxing, at peace. The album ends on a spoken word whisper: "And I'm not giving in yet, not when there's still an empty lawn chair staring into the Pleiades with a bottle of raspberry wine and dirty jokes and a sigh... just a sigh... keep the glasses on ice. I'll be there soon." It's a prospect of peace that gives the listener a smile, if if we may be hearing the last of one of our true musical treasures.

Amerigo

30-01-2004, 06:10

Sangre De Derramamiento releases his newest illest single: "I Wish I had a Burrito"

Lyrics:

Chorus: Boom boom boom
Yo what up yo
Chorus: Boom boom boom
Time to drop eso on your asses
Chorus: Boom boom boom
Yea, dos, tres, cuatro!
Chorus: Boom boom boom
I was walkin' along
Chorus: Boom boom boom
When I saw a F*ckin' gringo
Chorus: Boom boom boom
He be readin' periodico
Chorus: Boom boom boom
I blast his ass all over da mothaf*ckin' pavement
Chorus: Boom boom boom
Muerto
Chorus: Boom boom boom
Then da police come
Chorus: Boom boom boom
So dey be shootin' they pistolas
Chorus: Boom boom boom
And I be runnin' like a f*ck en fuego
Chorus: Boom boom boom
So then I see my homies
Chorus: Boom boom boom
And I be like, yo what it is mothaf*ckas
Chorus: Boom boom boom
And den dey be like f*ck it man, dis shit in da hizzle
Chorus: Boom boom boom
I wish I had a burrito
Chorus: Boom boom boom
So I could go to the moon
Chorus: Boom boom boom
I wish I had a burrito
Chorus: Boom boom boom
So I blast all those mothaf*ckas
Chorus: Boom boom boom
Muerto
Chorus: Boom boom boom
I wish I had a burrito
Chorus: Boom boom boom
So I's be da shit in da hood
Chorus: Boom boom boom
Wid da Mexican Mud in my wallet
Chorus: Boom boom boom
I be spankin' da penguins of shit
Chorus: Boom boom boom
Den I be wishin' as I lie on da chevy
Dat I had a burrito tonight
Woman singer vocalizing: BUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUURRRRRRRRRRRRRRRIIIIIIIIIIIITTTTOOOOO
BUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUURRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRIIIIIIIIITTTTTTOOOOOOOOOOO
AAAAAANNND TAAAAAAAAAAACOOOOOOOOOO SUPREME
Sangre De Derramamiento: And all you mothaf*ckas who be talkin' shit, be sayin' I can't rap, well joo mothaf*ckas I'll go and rape yo hijos!
Chorus: Boom boom boom
Dat's right biatches
Chorus: Boom boom boom
I wish I had a burrito, then I be hungry no mo', foo's!
In da hood, mo-fos, in da hood, trippin' up dis yellow shiznit while smackin' mah hos wid da bling bling, pushin da China White, and gangbangin' wid da rest of 'em. Peace yo.

Teakland

30-01-2004, 19:25

BAND NAME: Flunk Republic
MEMBERS (and instruments):
Boots: Lead vocals and experimental instruments (e.g. bottle of chocolate syrup, trashbag full of pop cans, xylotron (upright electric xylophone), whatever’s hanging around backstage or in the studio)
King Grank: Bass guitar, harmony vocals
Misty: Keyboard, chimes, handclaps
Washboard Johnson: Lead guitar, rhythm guitar
Lady Xia: Rhythm guitar, lead guitar, bass guitar
PAC-Man: Drums
Garry the Tribesman: Additional Percussion, chanting, rhythmic dancing
BAND AGE: Six years
RECORD LABEL: Mirror Image Music
GENRE: Funk / Jazz / Rock
PAST ALBUMS: Flunkship Down – Close Encounters of the Freaky Kind, Have You Freaked Your Booty Today?, Queens of the Revolution (none released internationally)
PAST SINGLES: none of international interest
BAND HISTORY:
The Flunk republic was the brainchild of the artist known as Boots (real name: Ricardo Lanza), a young man who was born and raised in Wilberg, one of the largest cities North Alton, the poorest province in Teakland. He took electrical engineering with a minor in musical theory at the University of North Alton, as part of the country’s higher education program. While he was in his third year of school, he met King Grank (real name: Grant King), a young music major who was interested in branching out his musical horizons. The duo put out an advertisement in the university paper, and the first incarnation of Flunk Republic was born, with Washboard Johnson (real name: John Washington), and PAC-Man (real name: Patrick Andrew Cardinal).
Their musical influences were diverse: Johnson and PAC-Man came from a rock and roll band called Red Wagon, Grank specialized in jazz composition, and Boots embodied the slow jams of funk. They christened the new musical style – hard-edged and bass-heavy, with jazz chord structure – Flunk, and they saw themselves as the messengers of this new style. The Flunk Republic was born.
After playing local clubs and theatres for a year and a half, they released their first album Flunkship Down to wide appeal. After another year of heavy touring, which created a great deal of national interest, they released their critically acclaimed sophmore album, Have You Freaked Your Booty Lately, which was Teakland’s highest-grossing rock album of all-time. Taking a year off from touring so that King Grank could finish his University Degree and Boots could finish his apprenticeship, Washboard Johnson and PAC-Man formed a side project, the electronically-influenced Royal Family Band.
After that hiatus, the group re-formed, bringing Lady Xia and Misty from the RFB, and released the revolutionary Queens of the Revolution, which featured an even more complex musical style (thanks to Grank’s polished arranging and the RFB electronic influence), and an experimental tone thanks to Boots’ desire for unique sounds. He had created a number of new instruments in his apprenticeship, including the band’s now-signature Xylotron, and enjoyed the idea of making music out of everyday items. In their most famous concert, Flunk Republic Live at The Launch Pad, Boots’ penchant for experimental sounds lead to the creation of a giant ice cream sundae, which the band distributed to the fans. Based on their incredible live shows, their prolific song-writing, and the recent addition of Garry the Tribesman, a legitimate tribesman from the Territory of Joven, Flunk Republic’s record company, Mirror Image Music, has decided to make their newest album, the two-disc I Pledge Allegiance to the Flunk Republic, an international release.

ALBUM NAME: I Pledge Allegiance to the Flunk Republic (Double Album)
TRACK LIST:
Disc 1 – Blue Water
1. Chowder
2. I Walk Like My Momma Told Me
3. Leather Boots, Plaid Skirt
4. HoneyDrip
5. Flex, Baby, Flex
6. Doublewide
7. Love Spatula
8. The Return of the Queens of the Revolution
Disc 2 – Green Grass
1. Main Course (45 minute live jam session)
2. Side Order (23 minute live jam session)

CRITICAL COMMENTS: The fourth album from Flunk Republic, I Pledge Allegiance to the Flunk Republic, is an amalgamation of the best of all the band has to offer. Disc One – Blue Water reflects the growing maturity of the band, both in terms of technical proficiency and composition. Boots’s lyrics range from thought-provoking (I Walk Like My Momma Told Me) to overtly sexual (Leather Boots, Plaid Skirt; Flex, Baby, Flex) to familiar tongue-in-cheek (Love Spatula; Doublewide) to conspicuously absent (the aptly-named Chowder, a journey through the band’s musical styles). Eight of the songs were composed by Boots and King Grank, and expand on what fans the band have come to expect from the group. The Return of the Queens of the Revolution, however, was a collaboration of all the members of the group, and it’s self-referential nature and schizophrenic style is an awkward way to end the album.
However, Disc Two – Green Grass more than makes up for it, and shows how mind-blowing the band can be live. This combination concert DVD / live CD is a tour-de-force of musicianship and energy. Boots’ charisma and sense of the absurd is expertly displayed on the DVD; in one memorable moment, on the song Love Spatula, he actually brings out an acoustically-rigged grill and makes a plate of pancakes for the fans in the front row, while the rhythmic mixing and sizzling is incorporated effortlessly by the rest of the band. The two audio tracks show how superior musicians can make improvisational art seem effortless, and makes this reviewer wish they had taken this approach on the last track of the first disc. On the whole, this is a stellar accomplishment from a band that seems to be on the verge of international superstardom.

SINGLE NAME: Love Spatula
LYRICS:
Verse 1:
My bed is hot
Like a fryin’ pan
I knead the batter
With my hands
You need a chef,
Baby, I’m the man
If you’re confused
Then you’ll understand

Chorus:
I want to flip you with my love spatula
So you’ll get done on both sides
I want to flip you with my love spatula
So you’ll get done on both sides

Verse 2:
Come on over
And take a look
If you like what you see
We’ll start to cook
You like it sweet
Well, I wrote the book
You like it hot
I like to fook

Chorus:
I want to flip you with my love spatula
So you’ll get done on both sides
I want to flip you with my love spatula
So you’ll get done on both sides

Verse 3:
You’ll get so hot girl
Like well-done steak
The juices flowin’
Your body ache
Sizzlin’ and slidin’
Like Shake ‘n’ Bake
The fire between us
You cannot fake

This song is the perfect introduction to Flunk Republic for the unsuspecting international crowd. With booty-shakin’ bass, foot-stompin’ percussion, and an unbelievably giddy hook, Love Spatula will set all the dance floors on fire.

As a way to gain publicity for the album, Mirror Image Music is producing a limited edition Love Spatula set, featuring the cd single, a 20 page fry-pan cookbook with recipes from the band members, and a hot pink Love Spatula with a heart-shaped base.

(OOC: Flunk Republic will be starting their first international tour very soon; interested nations may telegram or respond to this post.)

The SLAGLands

31-01-2004, 06:51

'In particular,' said Davae Hawl, 'the Trapeze Accidents... or if the two bands were a bit big to link together, perhaps Rede and Kata could perform together. Now THAT would be brilliant - I can imagine those two harmonising really well...'.

Speaking on behalf of his sister Rede, Warner Cornucopia releases the following to the press:

"Rede is, at this moment, not entirely capable of performing anything even resembling a collaboration due to her chemotherapy and ensuing recovery. She has, though, given the prospect her blessing as band leader. I'm not really interested in the project myself, but Jane and Santos have both discussed it, and I'm sure Todd and Yorick could be coerced.

"As for the Cornucopias, we really need to stay as far away from the studio as possible right now, so that we can best get through these difficult times.

"Our thanks to all our fans for their continued support in these times."

http://news.bbc.co.uk/media/images/38217000/jpg/_38217875_whitestripes300.jpg
Warner Cornucopia
Lead Guitar
The Trapeze Accidents

Kaze Progressa

31-01-2004, 09:02

Speaking on K-Sound the following morning, Davae Hawl said that 'perhaps, owing to the unfortunate circumstances at present, this is an idea for the future rather than now.'

'On behalf of the entire band, I would like to wish Rede a speedy recovery. We cannot be deserted of such a vibrant personality and fabulous singer-songwriter for long, and must hope that we are not.

The potential for a collaboration remains, but we feel that while the idea is right, the timing right now is not. Meanwhile, it must be emphasised that Monaa certainly go on, and we are currently considering tour dates and which of March's three main Progressan festivals - in Quarua, Taqizerr and Ugiata - we want to perform in.'

The SLAGLands

02-02-2004, 08:51

One of the top bands of the past year finally makes its return! I Can't Believe They're Not Records is pleased to announce the return of Newhart's very own wonderchildren, Slaya Hater! Their new album, Placebo Casino, is set to debut in three weeks, while the band's lead-off single, "Midnight Breakfast," has hit the airwaves! We can't wait to hear what the kids in Slaya Hater have in store for us when their new album reaches our CD players!

BAND NAME: Slaya Hater
BAND MEMBERS:
http://www.studentnewspaper.org/entertainment/02-03/week07/conor.jpg
Ronny Tenderton - Lead vocals/Guitar

http://www.furtherimages.com/lrrofcib1.JPG
Bobbi Tenderton - Bass/Backup vocals

http://hcmagazine.com/gui/content/interviews/mayday.jpg
Bo Mahoney - Drums

http://atlanta.creativeloafing.com/2002-11-13/scene-1.jpg
Ali MacPhereson - Keyboards
BAND AGE: 6 years
RECORD LABEL: I Can't Believe They're Not Records!
GENRE: Alternative, Punk/Pop
PAST ALBUMS: When I Was A Yung'Un, The Referendum, Because You're Beautiful, Placebo Casino
PAST SINGLES: "Age Is Just A Digit," "Flower Child," (from Yung'Un), "Fight," "Mr. Brownshoes," "Call To Order," (from Referendum), "Don't Hate Me (Can't Hate You)," "Singsong," "Arms And Legs," (from Beautiful)
BAND HISTORY: One of several bands to rise to popularity shortly after The Trapeze Accidents, the four young friends from Newhart met in high school through the music program and have been playing together ever since. The four began as a garage band, performing their infectious brand of alternative and punk for their friends only under the pseudonym Ronny and the Friggin' Banshees. Eventually, the group's popularity around the school became such that they were invited to attend the Karrowack Music Festival and Competition in Newhart. Named for SLAGLandic guitar legend Ranier Karrowack, the festival primarily featured grinding death metal bands. Strangely enough, Ronny and the Friggin' Banshees won the competition and, with their oldest member at 18 and their youngest at 16, were offered a record deal, pending a name change. Citing the group's success over the heavy metal bands (known as "slayas" throughout the Newhart area), Ronny and the Friggin' Banshees became Slaya Hater.

The band's first album for I Can't Believe They're Not Records, When I Was A Yung'Un, was heavily hyped on The Burn. The anthemic "Age Is Just A Digit" became a standard on pop radio and The Burn alike, and the band earned a co-headlining spot with another up-and-coming young band, The Trapeze Accidents. During this period, Ali MacPhereson (the group's youngest member) was involved with a brief lawsuit with her father involving royalties, which she promptly won. The incident, however, changed the group's outlook to one much darker.

The group's second album, The Referendum, reflected this change, featuring music that was far more political and jaded than anything on their first album. While the album sold moderately well, it was largely agreed that it wasn't their best. Jaded by the public's largely negative reaction, Slaya Hater temporarily went their separate ways. During this time, Ronny Tenderton recorded a solo album, Wide Awake, which reflected on the band's brief stint in the limelight. Oddly enough, once word of mouth had spread throughout The SLAGLands, Wide Awake reached #1 on the Jukebox Charts and spawned a reunion for Slaya Hater.

During their subsequent reunion tour, Ronny Tenderton became infatuated with bassist Bobbi Rynholt. All throughout the tour, Ronny began writing songs for Bobbi, debuting new ones at each show in his strange courtship ritual. At the tour's end, in an event televised live on The Burn, Ronny proposed to Bobbi. To celebrate the engagement, Slaya Hater released Because You're Beautiful--a collection of Ronny's songs for Bobbi--on the same week as their marriage. The album was one of the top-selling albums of the year, bested only by The Trapeze Accidents' Depants'd.

As the Jukebox Charts opened up their doors to the international community, Slaya Hater went into seclusion. Bobbi and Ronny picked up a large home on the shore in Newhart, and it was there that they began writing and recording their most recent release, Placebo Casino. At long last, after a tour with The Trapeze Accidents and Day Mascus, Slaya Hater releases the new album.

ALBUM NAME: Placebo Casino
TRACK LIST:
*1. Midnight Breakfast
2. Gone Numb
3. Bean Garden
*4. Frostbite Thursday Night (featuring J-Fly)
5. Happy Just To See You
6. Addendum
7. Form Over Function
8. TFSS
*9. Sea Of Stuffed Animals (featuring Jane B. Jane)
10. Level-Headed
11. Gum
12. Smoke Bomb
13. Shipwrights Anonymous
14. Power Failure
*15. Dice-Throwin' Blues

CRITICAL COMMENTS: No one ever thought that Slaya Hater could match the smash success of their last album, arguably the greatest release in the band's history. However, Slaya Hater has managed to sharpen their craft even further on Placebo Casino, the group's most focused album to date.

Most notable on the album are the guest appearances, and they certainly don't disappoint. Recruiting Orglan trip-hopper J-Fly may seem like career suicide for an alternative band, but his appearance on "Frostbite Thursday Night" only compliments the band's slick sound with some wonderful reflective street poetry. Trapeze Accidents' cellist Jane B. Jane also contributes guest vocals on "Sea Of Stuffed Animals," a cute childlike number that provides a lovely nod back to Slaya Hater's early days.

Even when operating on their own, of course, Slaya Hater is in rare form here. The 15 tracks clock in at just under 40 minutes, and the album at its best is a stomping, head-bobbing thrill ride. The military shouts on lead-off single "Midnight Breakfast" drive the song forward and contribute to an already catchy package. The album features a few slowed-down pop numbers ("Happy Just To See You," "Form Over Function," "Bean Garden"), but the album never once lags, particularly when the band heads into straight-up headbanging stomp rock ("TFSS"--which, incidentally, is short for "tinny f*cking speaker system," a slang term for mediocre car stereos--"Smoke Bomb," and "Power Failure"). Ronny Tenderton thrashes forward, supported well by the band's rhythm section, which may be the best in the business. At long last, the album comes to a rollicking finish on the experimental closer, "Dice-Throwin' Blues." The catchy and bouncy number sees the band at their most laid-back in years and supports the obvious philosophy of the band: Slaya Hater is at their best when they're kicking off their shoes and having a good time. Placebo Casino is just another example of them doing precisely that.

SINGLE NAME: "Midnight Breakfast"
LYRICS:
New Year's Eve
Second chance, Friday's
Ten o'clock
In a mess hall mess

Mop and pail
Sloshing grey tile
Trumpet call
And a dress right dress

Salute the armies
Salute the man
Ham in the oven
Eggs in the pan
Salute the waitress
Salute the guy
Gravy will simmer
Bacon will fry

Never said
Comin' home, angel
Celebrate
With a sing-sing-song

Punch the card
Click-drop-slide-plop
Silver bells
With a ding-ding-dong

Salute the skyline
Salute the man
Ham in the oven
Eggs in the pan
Salute the traffic
Salute the guy
Gravy will simmer
Bacon will fry

I'll make you breakfast on a cold winter's night
I'll work twelve hours just to bring you home some cash
I'll lie beside you on a cold winter's night
I'll save up bottles and increase our private stash

Open door
Firelight evening
Twelve o'clock
It's our year, new year

Arms and hands
Touch, feel, taste, love
Sing a song
Love you dear, ah, dear...

Sigh for the fireplace
Sigh for the man
Ham in the oven
Eggs in the pan
Sigh for the evening
Sigh for the guy
Gravy will simmer
Bacon will fry

You are my lady and
I am your guy
Gravy will simmer
Bacon will fry

The SLAGLands

04-02-2004, 19:36

THE JUKEBOX CHARTS!
Week 13 Sales:
1. The Trapeze Accidents - Ballpark Figure
LAST WEEK: n/a
2. Monaa - No Need To Cry, No Reason To Smile
LAST WEEK: #2
3. CDH - Never Tired of Crying
LAST WEEK: #1
4. Flunk Republic - I Pledge Allegiance to the Flunk Republic
LAST WEEK: n/a
5. Crimson Sedition - Granite Reflection
LAST WEEK: #5
6. Sangre De Derramamiento - Burrito Fuels Mi Corazon
LAST WEEK: #9
7. Various Artists - You Heard It Here First Volume XVRing--Live![/i]
LAST WEEK: #4
8. Kings in a Gutter - What!?
LAST WEEK: #3
9. Suite Meets - Modern Mythology... Music!
LAST WEEK: #6
10. The Trapeze Accidents - Lords of the Ring--Live!
LAST WEEK: #7
11. Green Machine - Soylent Green
LAST WEEK: #10
12. Dead Lamas - Sell Out and S*** Me, B*****s
LAST WEEK: #8
13. The Explodinators - The Yellow Album
LAST WEEK: #13
14. Three Word Name - Stop the Pop!
LAST WEEK: #14
15. Youthanasia - The Money Will Roll Right In
LAST WEEK: #11
16. Hollow Point - Jacketted
LAST WEEK: #12
17. Kamikaze - Harry Chapin--The Album
LAST WEEK: #16
18. SOVIET ANGER FORCE UNION - ANGER+FORCE=SOVIET
LAST WEEK: #15
19. Preventer Five - Five Wars and a Revolution
LAST WEEK: #17
20. The Federation First Army Military Orchestra and Chorus - Introductions and Farewells
LAST WEEK: #19

COMMENTS: The shocking news of Rede Cornucopia's diagnosis with breast cancer has no doubt helped catapult the new Trapeze Accidents album to #1 and thus tightened the race between the world's three biggest acts right now: the Accidents, CDH, and Monaa. Flunk Republic's unique brand of funk may help them join in that race in the coming weeks!

1. The Trapeze Accidents - "Orion"
LAST WEEK: #1
2. Monaa - "See the Light"
LAST WEEK: #3
3. Sangre De Derramamient - "I Wish I Had A Burrito"
LAST WEEK: n/a
4. Flunk Republic - " Love Spatula"
LAST WEEK: n/a
5. Slaya Hater - "Midnight Breakfast"
LAST WEEK: n/a
6. CDH - "Never Tired of Crying"
LAST WEEK: #2
7.Sangre De Derramamient - "Grande Pedro Perro G"
LAST WEEK: #5
8. Kings in a Gutter - "I'm Swell"
LAST WEEK: #6
9. Suite Meets - "Let Me Hear You (Rocket)"
LAST WEEK: #4
10. Crimson Sedition - "Blind Guardian of No More"
LAST WEEK: #7
11. Youthanasia - "Tracy the Class Whore"
LAST WEEK: #10
12. Hollow Point - "Breaking the Illusion"
LAST WEEK: #8
13. Three Word Name - "No Difference"
LAST WEEK: #11
14. Kamikaze - "The Rock"
LAST WEEK: #12
15. CDH - "Love's Burning a Hole in My Pocket"
LAST WEEK: #9
16. Mad Kid Disease - "The McSong"
LAST WEEK: #14
17. The Explodinators - "Smells Like Homer Spirit"
LAST WEEK: #16
18. The Trapeze Accidents - "Shoulder"
LAST WEEK: #13
19. Nine-Second Tractor - "The Shanty"
LAST WEEK: #15
20. Method to Madness - "Golgotha Tenement Blues"
LAST WEEK: #18

COMMENTS: Even in spite of a single scene that's as good as it's ever been, The Trapeze Accidents still manage to hold strong to their #1 position! Newcomers Flunk Republic and popular underdogs Slaya Hater may look to take that position later on, but watch out for the surprisingly popular Sangre De Derramamient's move in upcoming weeks!

Amerigo

05-02-2004, 03:02

As Damnable Records has fully been taken over by Amerigan International, the branch will be in a matter of weeks renamed and restaffed, as the executives of Damnable Records walk away with an undisclosed lump sum of money.

Before the company's complete demise, Damnable Records created a limited edition 3 disc collection consisting of the best bands that proudly wore its record label. The rush release has issued only 10,000 copies in Amerigo, and 1,000 internationally[/b[. This collection is a very much limited edition and is released in a [b]special 20 carat gold case. The collection comes with a bonus sixth disc which contains biographies, special features, and promo of all the bands that are included on the disk. The collection cost varies and was sold to distributors at an undisclosed sum.

The collection does not consist of solely singles but consists of hand picked songs of each band, most bands get only one song in the collection, but a select few have two.

Disc 1 Title: "A Turbulent Beginning"
Songs:
1. "Image of Power" --Semibiotic (3:20)
2. "Dance, dance, dance (the super dancing song)" --Whitney Pike and the Butterflies (2:34)
3. "Devoid" --Weasels of Excrement (4:00)
4. "All the Yellow Roads" --China Mao Experiment (7:09)
5. "Yeehaw, Cowboy" --Joanna Miller (4:32)
6. "F*** the Motherf***er, Die, Die Die" --Fetal Discharge (8:23)
7. "No More" --Money or Life (4:38)
8. "Smack Da" --Big Master Weasel (feat. Dr. Mushroomhead Boy) (5:49)
9. "Illinois River" --Andrew Hay (5:29)
10. "Due Course East" --Eliot Darley (4:44)
11. "Dublin" --O'Reily Leprechaun (2:49)
12. "Sunset under the Pipe" --Assmaster T and the Aprentics (4:31)
13. "Woomanjie" --Bailardrent Undilshmok (2:20)
14. "Move Yo Bodies (Jump, Jump, Jump)" --The Gang (3:28)
15. "Midget Blues" --GRAAARRRGRAA (7:21)

Disc 2: Title: The Blossoming

1. "Memory" --Crimson Sedition (3:29)
2. "A Very Hairy Christmas" --Hairy Harry, the Hairmaster of Hair (4:28)
3. "Commercial" --Bastard Brothers (5:09)
4. "Severed Limbs" --Hairy Knuckle (4:28)
5. "Doomsayers" --Ali The Magnificent (2:42)
6. "Seven for Six" --Eliot Darley (3:58)
7. "Caravan Bingo" --Soup of Delight (4:19)
8. "Forever" --The Cool Guys (2:31)
9. "Evil Lurks" --Pine Needle N' Symphony (4:18)
10. "Internal" --Withdral Cathedral (2:38)
11. "Afro" --Ayesha White (3:34)
12. "Da Foo"--DJ Septic and the Unders*** Crew (4:27)
13. "Defecation" --Pure Heroin (4:28)
14. "Sour Logic" --Bradley Devoi (5:29)
15. "Diva Star" --Ashley McAnaa (4:22)

Disc Three Title: Above, Forward, Beyond

1. "Vlad" --Crimson Sedition (special edition remix) (feat. Sarah Becker) (7:39)
2. "Jack of All Trades" --Hanna (3:28)
3. "Mountains of Fire" --Execution of the Lamb (4:52)
4. "Seven Stranges and One Saloon" --Roy Beckham (3:27)
5. "Brave" --Arson for Hire (4:37)
6. "Horny" --294 (4:15)
7. "The Fall" --Pure Heroin (4:20)
8. "The King of All" --Seven (2:03)
9. "Unpublic" --Blackbeard (4:34)
10. "JooHolla" --Da Shizz Doc (3:21)
11. "Deerhunt" --Trail (4:12)
12. "Following the Master" --Baldur's Death (4:01)
13. "Eternal" --Hellmasters (2:37)
14. "Whiskey and Tears" --Sarah Taylor (5:29)
15. "Tractor not Filed" --Ostrich Enema (9:00)

Amerigo

21-02-2004, 06:24

Bump?

Kaze Progressa

21-02-2004, 09:38

Monaa have announced they will perform at next month's Gateway Festival in Taqizerr, Kaze Progressa. The announcement, made on K-Sound last night, came as a surprise to some observers who thought they may have chosen to perform at Quarua instead, after the reception they gained performing in Quarua on their Polar Emotions tour over the festive period. But as Davae Hawl explains, 'We can't just pander to one group of fans - there are others around the country who want to see us - and around the world. Taqizerr draws a more international crowd than Quarua.'

Teakland

23-02-2004, 18:14

Thanks to the remarkable success of the Flunk Republic's new album I Pledge Allegiance to the Flunk Republic, MirrorImageMusic announced today that they will be releasing the band's three previous albums, Flunkship Down, Have You Freaked Your Booty Lately, and Queens of the Revolution, on the international market. It is hoped that this will increase international demand for the group, and push the band even further towards an international tour. MirrorImageMusic is also preparing to release at least another three albums in the next two months, each representing another diverse element of Teakland's music scene.

(OOC: I was going to also post something about an international tour here, but since no-one's said they'd be interested, I'll just have to wait it out.)

23-02-2004, 19:36

(OOC: This is Slag... sorry for the lack of updates, guys, but college has been kicking my ass. I promise an update today.)

The SLAGLands

24-02-2004, 05:55

I Can't Believe They're Not Records! is pleased to announce the debut of a brand new video from Slaya Hater, "Midnight Breakfast!" The video was shot mostly on location on a decomissioned SLAGLandic aircraft carrier, the S.A.S. Summer Sun. According to band singer Ronny Tenderton, the video was "...a hell of a lot of fun to make--easily the most fun we've had on the set of any video to date." So, without further adieu, the Burn is proud to present... "Midnight Breakfast!"

(The video opens in grainy black-and-white, akin to an old-fashioned film reel. The song opens with the sound of a record being placed on a player, with a scratchy brass band and percussion playing a 6/8 march. A clay model of the world spinning appears in center screen, held up by an obvious piece of string. A similarly supported biplane flies across the equator, carrying behind it a banner: "TERRIBLY ANACHRONISTIC NEWS OF THE WORLD."

And at once, the song kicks in, as the camera cuts to a shot of a snare drum playing the song's opening cadence--still in the same film reel monochrome. The camera begins slowly zooming out to reveal drummer Bo Mahoney, clad in a white sailor's costume. As the camera continues to zoom out, the rest of the band comes into view--all wearing similar sailor suits as the song springs to life. The 6/8 pop march is loud and raucous, with a stomping bass drum part providing the backdrop for the shouting guitar and bass. The one oddity about the band is that unlike the rest of the group, Ronny Tenderton is playing a mop like a guitar. As he begins to sing, he cuts away to the interior of the vessel, where soldiers are lined up against the back wall of the room.)

New Year's Eve
Second chance, Friday's
Ten o'clock

(At this point, and at all verse ends thereafter, the soldiers in the background join in the shouting, performing sharply-executed military maneuvers all the while.)

In a MESS HALL MESS!

(Back to Ronny now, who continues to mop. As he sings, the camera occassionally cuts to the surface of the ship, where biplanes have begun circling over the ship.)

Mop and pail
Sloshing grey tile
Trumpet call
And a DRESS RIGHT DRESS!

(The camera begins cutting rapidly back and forth between the mess hall and the deck of the ship, where the biplanes have begun to fire. The crew scrambles for cover as the planes sweep across the surface, but the band plays on into the song's rollicking chorus.)

Salute the armies
Salute the man
Ham in the oven
Eggs in the pan

(At this point, Ronny Tenderton grabs his mop in both hands and begins running up a nearby staircase as the band plays on.)

Salute the waitress
Salute the guy
Gravy will simmer
Bacon will fry

(Finally, Ronny makes it back to the deck to see the biplanes firing. The soldiers file in behind him, providing their maneuvers at the appropriate moment of the song.)

Never said
Comin' home, angel
Celebrate
With a SING-SING-SONG!

(Ronny darts to the center of the band and holds his mop high. The band begins circling him, still playing their instruments with one hand as they grab his feet with the other. All at once, the broom begins to glow bright yellow--the only colour to appear thus far.)

Punch the card
Click-drop-slide-plop
Silver bells
With a DING-DING-DONG!

(As the chorus kicks in, Ronny explodes into the air, gripping the golden mop in his hands. He begins unloading on the biplanes, knocking them out of the sky and into the sea one-by-one in kung-fu Matrix fashion. The band continues to rock out on the chorus below.)

Salute the skyline
Salute the man
Ham in the oven
Eggs in the pan
Salute the traffic
Salute the guy
Gravy will simmer
Bacon will fry

(At the bridge, Ronny begins hovering back down to the ship. The band continues to play the more subdued part of the song as the soldiers gather around, jumping up and down and cheering.)

I'll make you breakfast on a cold... winter's night
I'll work twelve hours just to bring you home some cash

(Ronny and Bobbi begin singing cheek-to-cheek here, her in perfect harmony.)

I'll lie beside you on a cold winter's night
I'll save up bottles and increase our private stash

(The camera fades away to an old convertible driving through the country. Bo and Ali are in the front seat, bobbing their heads up and down to the quieter verse--this time, without the military shouts. Bobbi and Ronny are in the back seat, her still strumming her bass as she rests her head on his shoulder with a sigh.)

Open door
Firelight evening
Twelve o'clock
It's our year, new year

Arms and hands
Touch, feel, taste, love
Sing a song
Love you dear, ah, dear...

(Ronny and Bobbi turn to each other as the song drops into silence. They slowly inch forward for a kiss...

...and all at once, the snare drum leaps back in with a long roll. As Ronny leaps to his feet for the solo, the car is suddenly driving through the center of a large city in the midst of a ticker-tape parade. The crowds cheer excitedly as Ronny produces the glowing mop and begins whaling out the solo. Finally, the car's sides fall away, and the band is on a rolling stage, their instruments waiting for them at the song's grand finale.)

Sigh for the fireplace
Sigh for the man
Ham in the oven
Eggs in the pan
Sigh for the evening
Sigh for the guy
Gravy will simmer
Bacon will fry

(The instruments drop out once again, and we are once again in the back of the convertible in the countryside. Ronny sings gently over the silence.)

You are my lady and
I am your guy
Gravy will simmer
Bacon will fry

(In the video's closing moments, Ronny reaches down beneath the seat, produces the mop, and chucks it out behind the convertible. The mop-turned-weapon falls to the ground with a clatter before settling in place, the convertible speeding off into the background. Fade.)

(OOC: Jukes coming soon!)

The SLAGLands

24-02-2004, 06:21

THE JUKEBOX CHARTS!
Week 14 Sales:
1. Monaa - No Need To Cry, No Reason To Smile
LAST WEEK: #2
2. The Trapeze Accidents - Ballpark Figure
LAST WEEK: #1
3. Flunk Republic - I Pledge Allegiance to the Flunk Republic
LAST WEEK: #4
4. Crimson Sedition - Granite Reflection
LAST WEEK: #5
5. CDH - Never Tired of Crying
LAST WEEK: #3
6. Sangre De Derramamiento - Burrito Fuels Mi Corazon
LAST WEEK: #6
7. Various Artists - You Heard It Here First Volume XV
LAST WEEK: #7
8. Kings in a Gutter - What!?
LAST WEEK: #8
9. Suite Meets - Modern Mythology... Music!
LAST WEEK: #9
10. The Trapeze Accidents - Lords of the Ring--Live!
LAST WEEK: #10
11. Green Machine - Soylent Green
LAST WEEK: #11
12. Dead Lamas - Sell Out and S*** Me, B*****s
LAST WEEK: #12
13. The Explodinators - The Yellow Album
LAST WEEK: #13
14. Three Word Name - Stop the Pop!
LAST WEEK: #14
15. Youthanasia - The Money Will Roll Right In
LAST WEEK: #15
16. Hollow Point - Jacketted
LAST WEEK: #16
17. Kamikaze - Harry Chapin--The Album
LAST WEEK: #17
18. SOVIET ANGER FORCE UNION - ANGER+FORCE=SOVIET
LAST WEEK: #18
19. Preventer Five - Five Wars and a Revolution
LAST WEEK: #19
20. The Federation First Army Military Orchestra and Chorus - Introductions and Farewells
LAST WEEK: #20

COMMENTS: No movement? Perhaps. In a week that spawned no new releases from any bands, Monaa and The Trapeze Accidents flip the top spot, while Flunk Republic continues a steady climb to the top. Will we see something shake the charts next week? We'll find out soon enough!

1. Slaya Hater - "Midnight Breakfast"
LAST WEEK: #5
2. The Trapeze Accidents - "Orion"
LAST WEEK: #1
3. Monaa - "See the Light"
LAST WEEK: #2
4. Flunk Republic - " Love Spatula"
LAST WEEK: #4
5. Sangre De Derramamient - "I Wish I Had A Burrito"
LAST WEEK: #3
6. CDH - "Never Tired of Crying"
LAST WEEK: #6
7.Sangre De Derramamient - "Grande Pedro Perro G"
LAST WEEK: #7
8. Kings in a Gutter - "I'm Swell"
LAST WEEK: #8
9. Suite Meets - "Let Me Hear You (Rocket)"
LAST WEEK: #9
10. Crimson Sedition - "Blind Guardian of No More"
LAST WEEK: #10
11. Youthanasia - "Tracy the Class Whore"
LAST WEEK: #11
12. Hollow Point - "Breaking the Illusion"
LAST WEEK: #12
13. Three Word Name - "No Difference"
LAST WEEK: #13
14. Kamikaze - "The Rock"
LAST WEEK: #14
15. CDH - "Love's Burning a Hole in My Pocket"
LAST WEEK: #15
16. Mad Kid Disease - "The McSong"
LAST WEEK: #16
17. The Explodinators - "Smells Like Homer Spirit"
LAST WEEK: #17
18. The Trapeze Accidents - "Shoulder"
LAST WEEK: #18
19. Nine-Second Tractor - "The Shanty"
LAST WEEK: #19
20. Method to Madness - "Golgotha Tenement Blues"
LAST WEEK: #20

COMMENTS: Things were a bit more exciting on the singles charts this week, as crowd favourites Slaya Hater catapult to #1 shortly after their release of their video for "Midnight Breakfast!" Will next week bring more excitement? We'll find out soon!

The SLAGLands

24-02-2004, 06:42

(OOC: I was going to also post something about an international tour here, but since no-one's said they'd be interested, I'll just have to wait it out.)

(OOC: I suppose I'll state this first... if you make an announcement of a tour and no one cares, I'll be glad to supply you with a band from my cabal of unsigned acts and bands who haven't released in a while. Day Mascus, Nine-Second Tractor, and that one guy with the big teeth whose name I can't remember all started as opening acts; I tend to use it as a way to explore new approaches to band-making.

I'll also use this opportunity to apologize for the long-ass delay, but it seemed like pretty much zero was happening. I wanted to see if a few people could get some promotion in before I posted something, so once I saw that interest had picked up a bit, I got around to posting.

I'd like to try to get this thread moving again a bit more. I'm not blaming anyone for anything, but I'd like to see things start getting really interesting again. Anyone have any suggestions?)

Giant Zucchini

25-02-2004, 04:47

OOC: I'll try entering a single, see if it makes things any better...

IC:
BAND NAME: The Mudskippers
MEMBERS (and instruments): Cheese (Banjo, Guitar, Piano, Lead Vocals, Harmony Vocals), BlackRug (Piano, Lead Vocals, Harmony Vocals, Guitar, Bass), SoloFoot (Guitar, Harmony Vocals), BigMat (Drums, Harmony Vocals)
BAND AGE: 2 years
RECORD LABEL: St. Andrew's Records
GENRE: Country, Bluegrass, Jazz, Pop
PAST ALBUMS: None
PAST SINGLES: None
BAND HISTORY: A young band focusing on blending various music styles to suit different kinds of music tastes.

ALBUM NAME: The Mudskippers
TRACK LIST:
1. Thank God I'm a Country Boy
2. He's So Smart
3. As the Crowe Flies
4. Dark As a Dungeon
5. Lean on Me
6. Hurt
7. Soldier's Joy
8. Stand By Me
9. Better Is One Day
10. This Little Light of Mine
11. (Bonus Track) Most High (Acoustic Version)

CRITICAL COMMENTS: This new band has a fresh approach to the music industry. It's very hard to categorise this band. They do bluegrass (Thank God I'm a Country Boy, As the Crowe Flies, Soldier's Joy, Better is One Day), country (He's So Smart, Dark as a Dungeon, Hurt, Most High), Even a bit of jazz, or pop, I don't even know how to categorise the rest of the songs (Lean on Me, Stand by Me, This Little Light of Mine). One thing's for sure, this album definitely has a religious feel behind it. If you're not religious, you may find this album slightly uncomfortable. Other than that, apart from the seeming lack of direction, a rather well crafted disc.

SINGLE NAME: He's So Smart
LYRICS:
I know this feller,
He's like Joe Cole.
He thinks that football
Is a one-man-show.
But when I saw him
Do this amazing feat,
I said to myself, "Hey, this is
Hard to beat," coz

Chorus:
He's so smart, he poured boiling water down his back,
So smart, he poured boiling water down his back.
First he started screaming, then his skin, it started peeling,
And now everybody knows that he's so smart.

And have you heard
Of his amazing memory?
I think he can't remember
How to count up to three.
And when he plays music,
He plays it so loud,
I bet he can't even
Hear himself shout

Chorus X2

Bridge:
Sometimes, here and there,
We cut him some slack,
But now and then we feel the urge to
Pat him on the back

Chorus X2

And now everybody knows,
Yes now everybody knows,
Every person in the whole wide world...

Know's that he's so smart

Amerigo

25-02-2004, 08:43

Crimson Sedition announces that its long anticipated new album will hit stores next week. Crimson Sedition has given no word to the press whatsoever, and the only announcement about the release was posted on their official site. It is truly bizarre that Crimson Sedtion is keeping this highly anticipated album under wraps. Although the track list is still unrevealed, the title of the new apparently "top secret" album leaked out: A Clockwork Orange. However, whether the sources that procured this information are reliable or not, remains to be seen. The sources further say that legal issues over the album title had prevented this album from hitting stores much earlier. These "sources" assert that all the legal trouble has been cleared up and the title had finally been extended onto this album.

***

A commercial for Sangre De Derramamiento...
*an old black and white movie of Moussolini giving a speech playing, subtitles are on the bottom*

subtitle: I do not want you to buy Sangre De Derramaiento's album.
subtitle: I will do anything I can to stop you from buying it.
black screen
narrator: Moussolini doesn't want you to buy Burrito Fuels Mi Corazon. Are you going to tell an Italian dictator tell you what to do?
black and white movie of fascistic Italian military parade with SDD's album in color overlapping the video.
narrator: Don't let the fascists win!

Aequatio

25-02-2004, 09:00

New Music Magazine - February 25, 2004 - Youthanasia To Record New Album!

The rough and raw rockers of Aequatio are heading back to the recording studio as they prepare to start on their sophomore album with Medieval Records, Eternal Animosity. The sound of the album is expected to be much more of a harder sound than the previous album, The Money Will Roll Right In which took more of a stab at the music industry and society in a very punk fashion.

Guitarist and appointed frontman, Pat Blanchard, had this to say about the recording of the album, "All I can say is that once we have a new setlist from this new album, we won't ever have to play Tracy the Class Whore again."

Amerigo

26-02-2004, 03:06

Savantium City, Amerigo (Amerigan Entertainment News Federation)--
The highly controversial hip-hop artist, Sangre De Derramamiento, was prohibitted from releasing the music video for his hit single "I Wish I had a Burrito", directly by the Federal Government. The video was reviewed by the Council of Censors (the customary legal proceedings for any media release) this morning and their reaction was unanimous--such an inapropriate video could not be aired on television. In their report of rejection, the Council wrote that the music video, "...implied perversion and depicted explicit scenes of blatant sexuality." Sangre De Derramamiento replied to the press in a live interview that he "...don't give a f*** if esos mo-fos be dissin' down like 'at. Ain't no shizzle. Yo kick dey asses any dia'." Immediatly in only two hours, after such words were aired live, the Council of Censors pressed charges for slander. It is unlikely that he will be prosecuted as no attorney can fully interpret exactly what SDD said. The fact remains, however that the video was censored and charges were pressed. It is expected that the popularity of SDD will plummet inside of Amerigo's borders and thrive internationally.

Aequatio

26-02-2004, 07:18

Medieval Records Presents: Eternal Animosity from Youthanasia

Record stores and retail distributors received the first shipment of the band's sophomore release today and they were almost cleared off the shelves before they could even be stocked. Sales of the album across Aequatio have hit the level almost equal to that of the band's first release with Medieval Records, The Money Will Roll Right In.

A tour is scheduled for early March which will promote the album's release around Aequatio's major cities. As well, the video for the album's first single, Past Mistakes, is expected to be released within the next week.

http://home.graffiti.net/bomfy:graffiti.net/eternalanimosity.bmp

CREDITS:
Pat Blanchard: Vocals/Guitar
Danny Hall: Drums/Vocals
Vanessa Wallace: Bass
Scott Fisher: Guitar

Produced and Engineered by Adam "Blade" Kirk and Youthanasia
Mixed by Andrew Wallace
Recorded and Mixed at Infection Studios, Arrio, Aequatio

Medieval Records, 2004

ALBUM NAME: Eternal Animosity
TRACK LIST:
1. For Unlawful Carnal Knowledge
2. Past Mistakes
3. Even Your Family Can Betray You
4. Apathy is a Weapon
5. Not a Killer
6. Life the Suicide Mission
7. Hilarity Ensues
8. Chaos
9. Animal (Pearl Jam Cover)

SINGLE NAME: Past Mistakes
LYRICS:
(“Eternal Animosity” Album Version)

I remember back in the day
When I didn’t know what to say
Chris just couldn’t take it anymore
And I just let him go out on his own.

(Chorus)
Past mistakes, haunts me like a ghost
Regret, bothers me the most.
If only I could go back and fix my…
Past mistakes.

I left her alone on Friday night
Sarah told me that it was all right
When Monday had rolled around
It was time to put her in the ground.

(Chorus)
Past mistakes, haunts me like a ghost
Regret, bothers me the most.
If only I could go back and fix my…
Past mistakes.

Now Jimmy had it all planned out
He wanted a future without any doubt
But when he got Olivia knocked up
He put razor to wrist and sliced it all up.

(Chorus)
Past mistakes, haunts me like a ghost
Regret, bothers me the most.
If only I could go back and fix my…
Past mistakes,
Past mistakes,
Past mistakes…

Giant Zucchini

27-02-2004, 03:10

The SLAGLands

27-02-2004, 06:12

The Mudskippers have released their second single from their debut album, the fusion Bluegrass/Rock & Roll instrumental As the Crowe Flies. This banjo-driven instrumental features a funky drum beat and features slick guitar and piano riffs.

(OOC: It's usually not a good idea to release two singles so close together, as you run the risk of overexposure for the album. Some people have done it successfully, though--for some reason, Limp "I Can't Believe People Still Like Us" Bizkit comes to mind, back when they released "My Generation" and "Rollin'" at the same time. The latter went over well, but the former didn't.

Just a sample of what may be to come. ;) And now... a post!)

Fret & Pick
The SLAGLands' Definitive Alt-Rock Magazine

Another Spin of the Wheel
One of last year's top-selling bands, punk/pop heroes Slaya Hater, make their triumphant return this week with the debut of their new album, Placebo Casino. With two multi-platinum records and one borderline failure under their belt, the four kids from Newhart are looking to duplicate the magic of Because You're Beautiful and the genre-busting When I Was A Yung'Un. Can they do it? F&P's own Brianna Smith sat down with Slaya Hater guitarist and vocalist Ronny Tenderton to discuss the band's new album and what they have in store for the upcoming year.

SMITH: First of all, thanks for agreeing to this interview, Ronny. It's always a pleasure to speak with an artist as gifted as you.

TENDERTON: My pleasure, Brianna. It's great to be back in business again.

SMITH: So tell us a bit about your new album, Placebo Casino. What's the conceptualization, the artistic vision behind putting this album together?

TENDERTON: Well, basically, Casino is just our attempt to start having a lot of fun again--to recapture the good times we had on our debut album. I really feel like the last two albums we put out were kind of laboured, by one thing or another. On The Referendum, Ali was fighting a big legal battle with her dad, so all of our minds were on that. On our last album [ed: Because You're Beautiful], all that was going through our minds during the recording process was the fact that Bobbi and I were getting married--something that really threw the band's dynamic for a loop. Recording Casino was our attempt to get recapture that energy... that zeal we had on our first record.

SMITH: So how has the group dynamic really changed now that you and Bobbi are married? How is that affecting the way you all work together?

TENDERTON: [laughs] It's different... very different. I mean, Bobbi's been my best friend since we were about 6 years old, and the four of us have been close since... oh... 5th grade? 6th? Anyway, a long time. So to have this sudden intimacy, this romance in the midst of our little clique--because sometimes, that's really what we are--kind of made things weird for a while. The sessions for our last album were plagued with a lot of in-fighting, a lot of conflicts of visions, and it really came down to me and Bobbi vs. Ali and Bo, when it got right down to it. Thankfully, the Rock Across the Multiverse Tour really helped bring us together. It was a great honour getting to play with the Trapeze Accidents again, and Day Mascus is a wonderful guy... truly one of the most talented musicians I've met in my life. We had a lot of fun on that tour, so we've really been able to perform as a band again--and that's really what it's all about.

SMITH: Placebo Casino features more guest appearances than any other album. You bring in Jane B. Jane for "Sea of Stuffed Animals" as co-vocalist, and J-Fly makes an appearance on "Frostbite Thursday Night." What made you decide to work with others?

TENDERTON: Well, the Multiverse tour really got us all close to the Accidents, particularly Jane. Jane's skill on the strings is pretty much unmatched--I don't think there's anyone in the Accidents or even in The SLAGLands with as much talent as she has. So what was great was that during our show in Athens--the one on the Accidents' new live album--Jane actually approached Ali about a possible collaboration on our next album. Well, essentially, her people called our people, and before long, Jane was doing vocals on "Sea of Stuffed Animals." It's a very pretty track, and Jane's voice and her cello provide a whole new layer to our sound.

As for J-Fly, Bo and I met him back when he was still doing the club scene, at a place in Orgla called Wit's End. The man has a presence on stage like few I've ever seen, and what's great about him is that unlike a lot of the pompous jackasses who play over in Orgla, he's really a down-to-Earth, incredibly funny guy. So we kept in touch for a while after that, and we all agreed that he'd be great for this street-poetry-type track that Bo wrote, "Frostbite Thursday Night." It's a very experimental track for us, and we had a lot of fun branching out like that.

SMITH: Now, the first single from Placebo Casino is "Midnight Breakfast." That's another song you wrote for Bobbi, correct?

TENDERTON: Right, but not like a lot of other songs I wrote for her. Shortly after our second album tanked, Bobbi and I were living together in a little place outside of SLAGTown. In order to pay our bills and such, I had to work second shift at a military-themed restaurant called Sgt. Grub's for a few months. I'd get home around midnight or so, and for some strange reason, Bobbi would always be really hungry for breakfast. So... that's where the song's concept came from. It's basically just a catchy little march number about doing anything you can for someone you care about.

SMITH: Interesting. Any other good stories about the songs on the album?

TENDERTON: Well, a few fans know the origin of "Smoke Bomb." It happened during our tour with Day and the Accidents last year, during a gig in Fourside, SLAGLand Titan. Apparently, the arena in Fourside was having problems with the special effects that whole evening, so all at once, right when we were in the middle of "Arms And Legs"--you know, really quiet, ballady song--this smoke bomb goes off. BOOM. Right at the front of the stage! Scares the shit out of me. So we try to get back in the song, and another one goes off right next to it! So by this time, the stage is covered in smoke, the audience is cracking up, and I just say, "To hell with it," and we bust into this great hardcore improv led by the lyrics "Smoke bomb's blowin' up my heart, blowin' up my soul, blowin' up the birds and the bees." The improv lasted about 10 minutes, and the audience loved it. Later that night, we cut the song down to respectable length, and before long, we had track 12 of our new album down.

SMITH: [laughs] Crazy how things work out sometimes, isn't it?

TENDERTON: Hey, it would've been really easy for me to get really pissed off at that point. But as I said--that tour did really well to loosen us up. Instead of throwing a fit about something we couldn't control, we turned it into something positive. That, to me, is what Placebo Casino is really all about. Sure, we all lose a lot in this world, but that doesn't mean that life is bad.

SMITH: Any plans to tour in support of the album?

TENDERTON: Oh, of course. We're finalizing some dates for our upcoming tour soon. We'll be headlining this time, and we've been lucky enough to pick up some of our good friends from the punk world, The Blender Babies, to open up for us. We really want to pick up some dates on the international scene and maybe even some other foreign bands. With the Jukebox Charts opening up to the world, it's a great time to really get out there and explore other cultures and styles and stuff. It's a very exciting time to be in the music business.

SMITH: Any other surprises in store from Slaya Hater?

TENDERTON: [winks] There's always surprises in store from Slaya Hater. We're even looking at putting together a video for our second single that's going to be really different from anything we've done before. We haven't picked a track yet, but "Smoke Bomb," "Sea of Stuffed Animals," and "Gum" are our top priorities right now. You'll just have to wait and see.

SMITH: Anything else? Anything you want to say to your fans?

TENDERTON: Remember this, guys: life isn't that bad. I know a lot of bands--like these Monaa guys, for example--have a real nihilistic outlook on life. But take it from us: things get better. I hope y'all enjoy our new album--it'll be in stores next week. Pick it up. It's a lot of fun, and we look forward to seeing you all on the road later this year.

SMITH: Thanks again for stopping by, Ronny.

TENDERTON: My pleasure.

Amerigo

27-02-2004, 07:19

(OOC:

I'll also use this opportunity to apologize for the long-ass delay, but it seemed like pretty much zero was happening. I wanted to see if a few people could get some promotion in before I posted something, so once I saw that interest had picked up a bit, I got around to posting.

I'd like to try to get this thread moving again a bit more. I'm not blaming anyone for anything, but I'd like to see things start getting really interesting again. Anyone have any suggestions?)

OOC: Not to brag or anything, but my one lone bump seemed to remind people that this thread still existed. Oh wait I am bragging.... :twisted:

Aequatio

29-02-2004, 20:29

OOC: Not to brag or anything, but my one lone bump seemed to remind people that this thread still existed. Oh wait I am bragging.... :twisted:

OOC: Your bump didn't bring me back to this thread, I just got back into NS and I'm sick of dealing with n00bs in war RP's, so I've had my fill of war fora long time, time for something new.

The SLAGLands

03-03-2004, 06:39

THE JUKEBOX CHARTS!
Week 15 Sales:
1. Youthanasia - Eternal Animosity
LAST WEEK: n/a
2. Slaya Hater - Placebo Casino
LAST WEEK: n/a
3. Monaa - No Reason To Cry, No Reason To Smile
LAST WEEK: #1
4. The Mudskippers - The Mudskippers
LAST WEEK: n/a
5. The Trapeze Accidents - Ballpark Figure
LAST WEEK: #2
6. Flunk Republic - I Pledge Allegiance To The Flunk Republic
LAST WEEK: #3
7. Sangre De Derramamiento - Burrito Fuels Mi Corazon
LAST WEEK: #6
8. Various Artists - You Heard It Here First Volume XV
LAST WEEK: #7
9. CDH - Never Tired Of Crying
LAST WEEK: #5
10. Crimson Sedition - Granite Reflection
LAST WEEK: #4
11. Suite Meets - Modern Mythology... Music!
LAST WEEK: #9
12. Green Machine - Soylent Green
LAST WEEK: #11
13. The Trapeze Accidents - Lords of the Ring--Live!
LAST WEEK: #10
14. The Explodinators - The Yellow Album
LAST WEEK: #13
15. Kings in a Gutter - What!?
LAST WEEK: #8
16. Dead Lamas - Sell Out and S*** Me, B*****s
LAST WEEK: #12
17. Hollow Point - Jacketted
LAST WEEK: #16
18. Youthanasia - The Money Will Roll Right In
LAST WEEK: #15
19. SOVIET ANGER FORCE UNION - ANGER+FORCE=SOVIET
LAST WEEK: #18
20. Three Word Name - Stop the Pop!
LAST WEEK: #14

COMMENTS: After a rather slow sales week last week, two high-profile debuts from crowd-pleasers Youthanasia and Slaya Hater put a little bite back into The Jukes this week! Look for the unique country blend of the Mudskippers to make things interesting in the upcoming weeks.

1. The Mudskippers - "He's So Smart"
LAST WEEK: n/a
2. Slaya Hater - "Midnight Breakfast"
LAST WEEK: #1
3. Youthanasia - "Past Mistakes"
LAST WEEK: n/a
4. Sangre De Derramamient - "I Wish I Had A Burrito"
LAST WEEK: #5
5. Monaa - "See the Light"
LAST WEEK: #3
6. The Trapeze Accidents - "Orion"
LAST WEEK: #2
7. Flunk Republic - " Love Spatula"
LAST WEEK: #4
8. The Mudskippers - "As The Crowe Flies"
LAST WEEK: n/a
9. CDH - "Never Tired of Crying""
LAST WEEK: #6
10. Sangre De Derramamient - "Grande Pedro Perro G"
LAST WEEK: #7
11. Suite Meets - "Let Me Hear You (Rocket)"
LAST WEEK: #9
12. Crimson Sedition - "Blind Guardian of No More"
LAST WEEK: #10
13. Hollow Point - "Breaking the Illusion"
LAST WEEK: #12
14. Kings in a Gutter - "I'm Swell"
LAST WEEK: #8
15. Kamikaze - "The Rock"
LAST WEEK: #14
16. CDH - "Love's Burning a Hole in My Pocket"
LAST WEEK: #15
17. Youthanasia - "Tracy the Class Whore"
LAST WEEK: #11
18. The Trapeze Accidents - "Shoulder"
LAST WEEK: #18
19. Three Word Name - "No Difference"
LAST WEEK: #13
20. Nine-Second Tractor - "The Shanty"
LAST WEEK: #19

COMMENTS: The Mudskippers' debut singles are lighting up the charts this week, with favorites Youthanasia and Slaya Hater close at bay! Sangre De Derramamient is also receiving heavy airplay on The SLAGLands' Official Music Video Network, The Burn, after seeing his video banned in his homeland! Could a refugee journey be close at hand?

The SLAGLands

03-03-2004, 06:49

Taken from The Orgla Watchdog, 3-3-2XXX:

J-Fly Signs to Major Record Label

ORGLA - In a move that Orglan club fans have been awaiting for some time, our city's own J-Fly has signed a 3-album deal with media moguls Pariah Records. The label is most famous for its hip-hop acts, including last year's sensation, What's-His-Face, and jazz/rap legend Murph McGurth.

"It's really a great day to be me," J-Fly said in a press conference following the announcement. "I'm going to be in the studio soon, recording all kinds of great tracks for all my fans, for all the ladies, for all my people on the streets and in the clubs and still giving rub-a-dubs, all my bubs that get their dubs up for their mums..." J-Fly then went into a typical bizarre rhyming rant, much to the delight of the crowd.

J-Fly (real name Jay Flynn) has been performing in Orglan clubs for the past year under his pseudonym. His demo, The Levels EP, has reached near-mythic status within the city and is currently one of the most sought-after items in online auctions throughout The SLAGLands. Songs like "The Spittoon" and "Grey Chaser Pool Party" have received play within clubs throughout the area.

J-Fly has already begun recording his debut album on Pariah Records, which is expected to be released very soon.

Giant Zucchini

03-03-2004, 07:05

Mudskippers lead vocalist Cheese is extremely happy at the success of the Mudskippers' debut single. He wrote this song after a moment of great inspiration. He recounts, "SoloFoot, for some reason, just poured boiling water down his back. The scar's still there. It's a reminder of his insanity. Well, the single's number 1 now, I guess it has it's advantages! Hopefully it'll boost our record sales too!" Meanwhile, their cover of Scott Vestal's As the Crowe Flies is also flying high in 8th. We'll be looking forward to more from this new band from the land of the Zucchinis.

Kaukolastan

03-03-2004, 08:06

Kaukolastan Entertainment News Reports
Drummer Arrested, Song Released
Two weeks ago, Hollow Point drummer, Billy Mendez, was arrested, officials confirmed today. The drummer was apparently involved in a dispute with club authorities. He accused the club owner of mistreating his girlfriend, and when asked to leave, proceeded to yank the owner's shirt over his head and shove him into a toilet. When the police arrived, Mendez calmly showed them to the owner, who was still tied up to the toilet, and then turned himself in. Alchohol was involved. The record label, Dark Dawn, managed to get the charges revoked by promising free shows to the owner, but in an interview, Mendez appealed to remain in jail.

"Listen, man, I'm sick of this." Mendez stated to a conference. "All these artists, getting bailed because they're money to people, or they have so much. I messed up. I drank, I got into a fight. I think I owe to everyone to take my licks."

Fortunately for Mendez, without charges, he could not be kept in jail. However, he was put into rehab, and from that experience came the newest song by Hollow Point, "Lift". Written by Mendez while he was in the county jail, the band released it free online for download.

Mendez stated, "This is my apology, and my offering to the fans. I'm in rehab now, because of a problem. This may help others with that." He wrote the song and penned out the drum beats on scrap paper, and mailed it to the still-unnamed guitarist. The band recorded the song with guest drummer Erik Riven of the heavy metal band "Falacity", and released it online and to numerous radio stations.

States avid fan and music downloader John Nelson, "Man, that song ROCKS! And it's FREE! Dude!"

Lyrics to "Lift"
Lift!

Just a little higher
mayber I could fly
Just a little more
I can touch false sky

Can you bring me up
make me forget the truth
can you strip the ground
fountain, eternal youth

Lift! Take me away from here!
Lift! Make me forget the fear!
Lift! This false unholy one!
Lift! Forget all, it's begun!

This temporary balm
where there is no worry
A truly sick calm
no pressure or hurry

This world is so dull
pressure crushing down on me
Give me another life
everything fine that I see!

Lift! Take me away from here!
Lift! Make me forget the fear!
Lift! This false unholy one!
Lift! Forget all, it's begun!

Solo

Then descending
and I'm falling down
This lie is broken
and shards all around

Bass Solo

WHERE'S MY-

Lift! Take me away from here!
Lift! Make me forget the fear!
Lift! This false unholy one!
Lift! Forget all, it's begun!

Spoken - Now it is gone
Broken glass and shattered life
Spoken - Where did it go
Boomerrang, returning strife

Spoken - There is nothing here
Cold and broken, on the ground
Spoken - Left alone and insecure
Tattered remnants lie around

Solo

WHAT IS-

Lift! Take me away from here!
Lift! Make me forget the fear!
Lift! This false unholy one!
Lift! Forget all, it's begun!

False Lift!
Where's Lift!
Begging Lift!
Pleading Lift!
Fleeing Lift!
Give me Lift!

God! Give me Lift!

AND FALL!

This song has boosted the band's popularity further, and the fight and aftermath have gained them more attention. It has also gotten much airplay from underground and mainstream stations, because there is no fee to play it.

Teakland

03-03-2004, 19:55

Teakland Music News - Flunk Republic Floundering
But can Boots and Company stay afloat?
Marcy Manitobabenis, B.A., Staff Writer

Just two weeks after their raucous debut at #4 on the Billco Charts, the good ship Flunk Republic seems to be adrift at sea. With a proposed international tour stalled before it could start, their position on both the album and singles charts dropping, and conflicts with the record company on what the new single should be, Teakland's premiere funk act look like they're on their way down to Davy Jones' Locker. But according to Boots and the gang, they're not going down without a fight.

"I don't understand what everyone's worried about," said Boots in an interview held in the Flunk Republic recording studio last week. "We're in talks with the SLAGLands to do a tour with one of their up-and-coming groups, so that should raise the band's profile a little bit. As for the singles issue, well let's just say that the we and the record company differ on what best reflects the group."

According to my sources at MirrorImageMusic, the group's next proposed single is the very fun and danceable Doublewide, a single very much in line with the current single Love Spatula. But the group, not wanting to be pigeonholed as a juvenile novelty act, has said no to the proposed single, preferring instead to use the more musical (and overtly sexual) Leather Boots, Plaid Skirt, a song that the record company fears would kill the band's current momentum.

"I don't care what they say," says bassist and co-songwriter King Grank, "it's a better song, and we want to show the rest of the world that we're capable of doing more than just light, humourous, dance songs."

"NOT that we're ungrateful for the exposure that Love Spatula's given us," interrupts Boots, "but we feel that we have a better shot at longevity in the industry if we diversify."

Whatever the outcome, the Flunk Republic is happy for their success, and even if things don't work out as promisingly as it first seemed, the group promises that there will be more to come in the future...maybe even sooner than one would think.

"There are SO many songs we have written and recorded, but never polished up and released," hints King Grank. "Technically, we could release a new album every six months and not write any new songs for three years."

Perhaps it's the calm before the storm, or perhaps it's the smooth waters that they need to sail on to bigger things. Whatever it is, the world hasn't seen the last of the Flunk Republic.

(OOC: SLAGLands, just gimme the name of a opening band and we'll tear the roof off your country. In a nice, musical way, of course; not like a hurricane.)

Teakland

03-03-2004, 23:45

BAND NAME: Dodge
MEMBERS (and instruments):
Jason Cross: Lead vocals, guitar
Danny Pitt: Lead vocals, guitar, banjo, mandolin
Ken Dodson: Bass guitar, piano
Seth Baker: Percussion
BAND AGE: Three years
RECORD LABEL: Mirror Image Music
GENRE: Alt-Country / Folk
PAST ALBUMS: Get Outta (independent distributor), Boot Black Stain
PAST SINGLES: none of international interest
BAND HISTORY:
Jason Cross was a little boy who dreamed of being a great country music singer. He dreamed of standing onstage in a black suit, a black Stetson atop his head, gripping the neck of his acoustic guitar, and singing songs about the wide open country and the life of a farm hand. He practiced guitar every night from the time he was six, mastering chords and complicated fingering, in pursuit of his dream. Unluckily for him, Jason Cross grew up in Stalley, Teakland’s capital, the largest city in the entire country. He had never even been to a farm until he was twelve years old, when he began to spend summers doing odd jobs with his aunt and uncle. They saw how much he loved the music, quite often at the end of a long day in the fields, they would bring out their instruments and have an informal Cross family jam session. Here he honed his playing, and learned songs and stories that would inspire his own songwriting. He also learned to love life on the farm.

By the age of seventeen, Cross had already started college, and he had enrolled in the Faculty of Agricultural Science at the University of Brownridge. While attending an Orientation Week Blow-Out party, he saw a performance by a three-piece group that played country music with a city feel, and he was inspired. He got the group’s number from the Student’s Union and set up a meeting, and after a few weeks of insistent meetings, submitted songs, and impromptu demo tapes, he was given a place in the band. The group kept their original name, Dodge, and Cross quickly became the lynchpin of the band, bringing in new songs and taking lead vocals more and more often.

At first, original front man Danny Pitt was more than happy to share the spotlight with the younger Cross, but soon he felt like he was becoming a sideliner in his own band. Fights started breaking out between the two, small ones at first, but soon it developed into a never-ending feud. The group put out their first album, the raw and unvarnished Get Outta, shortly before Pitt delivered an ultimatum: unless he was able to get back some of his creative control, he would leave the band. A repentant Cross agreed, and the relationship has been rocky, but relatively stable ever since.

Get Outta was a critical success but performed poorly commercially. The hype from college radio and independent music magazines, however, was enough to interest MirrorImageMusic enough that they signed them to a three record deal. The group’s first record under the MIM banner, Boot Black Stain, was a rocking bluegrass album whose bluesy title track actually got some play on rock radio stations nation-wide. Recorded in Manat’s famous Nashvil recording studios, the more polished album was even more highly acclaimed, thanks to the amalgamation of authentic country sound with electric rock rhythms. With their newest album, uprooted, their commitment to electric guitars has diminished a little, and a more folky sound has emerged. The music has only gotten better, however, and old-school Dodge fans will not be disappointed.

ALBUM NAME: uprooted
TRACK LIST:
1. Diesel Junction
2. Ragged
3. Quarter Cup of Coffee
4. Willow Blossom
5. Down Border Road
6. Tracy
7. Why’d You Cry
8. Unforgotten
9. Annie’s Last Girlfriend
10. The Museum Piece

CRITICAL COMMENTS:
Dodge’s new album uprooted is a bit of a conundrum. Is this really the new record from the people who gave us last year’s rocking single Boot Black Stain? Alternately upbeat and heart-breaking, the album is just another step towards merging the musical styles of its two main songwriters, Jason Cross and Danny Pitt. Cross’s songs are authentic country anthems, while Pitt’s contributions are sometimes more in line with the college rock radio than Nashvil. This reporter thinks that the mainstream influence of MirrorImageMusic lead to the creation of a more radio-friendly effort this time around, but as long as their music stays at such a top-notch level, then frankly, who cares?

SINGLE NAME: Ragged (Music: Cross / Dodson, Lyrics: Cross)
LYRICS:
Verse 1:
Late nights out drinkin’ bad bourbon and beer
My brain succumbs silently to the fear
And I start to wonder, what’m I doin’ here
Abandoned and ragged

Verse 2:
The night is so tired it can’t quite see straight
The bartender tells me it’s gettin’ late
I push off the barstool and out through the gate
Abandoned and ragged

Chorus:
Alone and forsaken
At night I awaken
From dreaming about you
The darkness it gathers
I’m hangin’ in tatters
I’m ragged without you

Verse 3:
The owl that hunts by the light of the moon
The shepherd that whistles a haunting tune
The woman that leaves you a little too soon
Abandoned and ragged

Verse 4:
The whisper that soars over rivers and plains
The gambler that’s desp’rate for one more game
The night after you leave, and I remain
Abandoned and ragged

Chorus:
Alone and forsaken
At night I awaken
From dreaming about you
The darkness it gathers
I’m hangin’ in tatters
I’m ragged without you

(Piano Instrumental)

Verse 5:
I sit in the garden and try to recall
If we ever loved one another at all
Or if we were destined to give up and fall
Abandoned and ragged

Verse 6:
I light up my very last cigarette
And breathe out the smoke of a night of regret
And promise myself I will try to forget
Abandoned….

The SLAGLands

04-03-2004, 04:33

"I don't understand what everyone's worried about," said Boots in an interview held in the Flunk Republic recording studio last week. "We're in talks with the SLAGLands to do a tour with one of their up-and-coming groups, so that should raise the band's profile a little bit. As for the singles issue, well let's just say that the we and the record company differ on what best reflects the group."

(OOC: I don't see why you'd be in negotiations with an entire NATION just to get an opening act... but okay. :lol: Here's one for ya, recycled from a mockumentary a friend of mine and I started.)

Asalamalakem, mah brotha!

Sounds like what your tour REALLY need is a nice taste o' Da Streetz... an' I gots it foh ya, mah brotha. What you is gonna be hearin' is the most off da hook Streetwize bruddas dis side o' da Orgla strip. We be ready to give yo tour a nice healthy dose of the Streets... courtesy of dey own Streetwize mastah, Ebony Streets an' Da Maestro.

Oh, an'... uh... I gotta confess somethin' real confidential-like, y'know wha' I'm sayin'? Da Maestro... he's a real good guy, an' a real representative of Da Streetz... but, uh... he don't speak English real good, y'know wha' I'm sayin'? So don't, like, get offended... he ain't tryin' t'get fresh wit' ya o' nuttin'. He's just from... a different Street, shall we say?

http://www.louisvillescene.com/music/features/images/p20010407hayes.gif
Ebony Streets
Urban Poet and Funk Master
Ebony Streets & The Maestro

MY MISTRESS'S EYES ARE LIKE THE TICKING OF THE CLOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOCK!

http://www.weblaopera.com/voces/tenores/pavarotti.jpg
The Maestro
Keyboardist, Background Vocalist, and Instrumental Demigod
Ebony Streets & The Maestro

Kaukolastan

04-03-2004, 07:01

Special Edition "Jacketted" LP Released!

Released as a bonus pack with the Limitted Edition Jacketted LP, this new song by Hollow Point is paired with Lift, live versions of Deus Ex Machina and Breaking the Illusion, as well as a full orchestrated version of Battle Hymn of the Republic, which features the Corsis Philharmonic and the Band in a full scale rendition of the classic piece. This Limitted Edition costs no more than the original album, but also contains the music video to Breaking the Illusion. Previous owners of the regular CD can send in their barcode sticker and recieve all of this free from the site. While not yet a signle, this song, clocking it at over five minutes, has crossover appeal that goes beyond the traditional Hollow Point fifteen-minute tracks, and may gain them more mainstream followers, while still pleasing their hardcore fans. It has become a huge underground hit, and radio stations are clamoring for an official release to go along with the already released Lift.

"Nothing" Lyrics

-Party Sounds, fading to minor guitar chords-

-Builds-
Have you ever felt nothing
Have you ever been nothing
Have you stood in nothing
and felt the nothing in you?

-Reaches climax of sound, fades to melody-

Standing in the cold as it seeps through
but it cannot compare to the freeze in you
Starting with your mind and eating your soul
until little is left but your pathetic role

It starts with a lie, in your deceit
Become what you're not, amazing feat
Do you wear the mask, does it wear you?
You're a human lie, no face is true

-Full force returns-

Have you ever felt nothing
Have you ever been nothing
Have you stood in nothing
and felt the nothing in you?

Every smile you make tears more away
Slaughter my soul with every word you say
Your life is now a fake, you are a lie
Tried to change life, made friendship die

Have you ever felt nothing
Have you ever been nothing
Have you stood in nothing
and felt the nothing in you?

-Solo-

-Slows, returns to melodic sounds of beginning, builds-

Every time you smile
the knife twists in me
Every time you touch
it is ripped from me

All that you have gained
cannot save your soul
All that you now have
the reaper takes toll!

-Blast Beat Solo-

And now you want to come back to me?
Do you think I can set you free?
You turned your back on us long ago
You are nothing to me now, you know.

Have you ever felt nothing
Have you ever been nothing
Have you stood in nothing
and felt the nothing in you?

You are now nothing
you have always been nothing
you will always be nothing
and now we're through!

Nothing! Lies! Nothing! You've Died! Nothing!
Nothing. Nothing.

-Fades-

04-03-2004, 07:30

BAND NAME:
The Bankshot Blues

MEMBERS:
Ted McCaine (vocals/lyrics)
Ami Ficher (guitar/lyrics)
Grant Crowe (drums)
Eric Young (bass)
Colin Young (guitar)

BAND AGE:
3 yrs.

RECORD LABEL:
Orca Bay Records Inc.

GENRE:
Rock and/or Roll

PAST ALBUMS:
none.

PAST SINGLES:
"Jaime Wears a Green Dress"
"Can't Spell My Name"
"A Slight Smile on Sunday"

BAND HISTORY:
The band formed shortly after Eric, the older brother of Colin, graduated from the same class as Ted and Grant. The three originally tried to collaborate on a deth-metal project, but after they couldn't agree on a name, Grant's younger cousin Ami decided to show them some of her songs. The band immedietly recognized that Ami was a very talented writer, and coincidentally, a much better guitarist then Eric. After switching to bass and bringing his younger brother Colin in on back-up guitar, the Bankshot Blues were formed. It only took three months before their very first single, Jaime Wears a Green Dress, hit the loacl airwaves. Since then, two more EPs have come out, and the first single to the upcoming Felicity's Towel debut cd, "She Cries" is being released now.

ALBUM NAME:
Felicity's Towel (Unreleased)

TRACK LIST:
[As yet undetermined]

SINGLE NAME:
She Cries

LYRICS:
I can't help but wonder, what she sees in me
burning candles lighting up, all the tears she streams
the dinner sits untouched upon, the table so serene
still she cries.

One thing is certain, all the rest are lies
beautiful and damned ones, never realize
that the dark is light enough to see the ignorance of speed
and still she cries.

Poetry of motion, counting out the beats
To hear a voice in every mind, sounding out defeat
And as they run they look behind to see, what tempts the wandering eye
and still she cries

Come on, come on, get up, I wanna take you
away from all of this and what has got you lost and feeling down
you just get it off your back, let it fly away
but still she cries.

She can't seem to manage, the simple things in life
just has to make you wonder, how she copes with strife
and as she sits and vents her spleen to me, I seem to realize

She cries

Come on, come on, get up, I wanna take you
away from all of this and what has got you lost and feeling down
you just get it off your back, let it fly away
but still she cries.

The SLAGLands

04-03-2004, 23:38

Day Mascus to Release Movie Soundtrack

Hot off the heels of the platinum Uh... Hey and a successful tour of Freebodnik V, stoner rocker Day Mascus is nearing the final stages of recording the soundtrack to the upcoming film Lis. The film, set to release within the next month, chronicles the life of SLAGLandic folk legend Elisabeth Krumpt, the woman who is in considered in large part responsible for the rise of The SLAGLands' booming music industry.

"It was really an honour to have a hand in this project," Mascus said in a recent interview with Waistin' magazine. "The film stars Shana Eastley--one of my single favourite indy film stars, and human beings for that matter--as Lis, and she's absolutely incredible. All musicians in The SLAGLands owe a lot to the real-life Lis, and it's really incredible to have a part in this tribute to her amazing life."

The album, For Lis, features both covers of Krumpt tunes (including and Mascus originals written exclusively for the film. The lead-off single, a cover of Rilo Kiley's "Hail to Whatever You Found in the Sunlight," is expected to debut on national radio and The Burn within the next few weeks--ironically enough, right around the same time as the release of "Headliner" by the Trapeze Accidents (the second single from their album Ballpark Figure), which was sung by Mascus.

"It's going to be really weird, being on the radio with two songs at once," Mascus said, "especially when I'm used to being on the radio, like, not at all."

Amerigo

05-03-2004, 00:53

(Borleone, Amerigo) AENF

Sangre De Derramamiento's contract has been canceled by Records4Less, despite the tremendous profits made from the sale of his album Burrito Fuels Mi Corazon. It is rumored that his name has been black-listed by all Amerigan record companies--his negotians with both Amerigan International, RedStar Records, 777 Stone, and Terror Music collapsed following his contract anullment. Since, the government has taken a more hostile position toward organized crime, SDD can not count on his associates (which he claims to have) for any aid in convincing any government officials to change their mind about the ongoing lawsuit for slander and a newly presented charge of treason.

SDD's album has been removed from all stores in the Empire of Amerigo, however, due to complications the albums already in stores internationally can not be recalled without large losses for Records4Less (the government has compensated Records4Less for all albums removed [the albums removed have been returned to Records4Less and it was declared illegal for them to distribute the record within Amerigan borders]). It is rumored that Records4Less will continue to feed the recalled records into the international market to double their profits.

The charge of slander, seemingly nothing has been amplified to slander and treason. It is still unknown why he faces this accusation nor why they would want to prosecute him. However, during an exclusive interview with an Amerigan Delegate of the Department of Internal Securities, Frank Santini has made one simple statement that has many implications, but no straight answers:

"The Amerigan government has been under the influences of organized crime for many years. This, in my opinion is disgraceful, and a decade of reforms in all areas of the government has culminated to the clean up of internal government offices. We will strike the crime organizations in Borleone, in Liasa, in Delville, in Santhasia... wherever it lives and proliferates we shall strike... The first step of our Organized Crime Cleanup Program (OCCP), is to remove its influences in an average citizen's everyday life."

Although, when asked if SDD was prosecuted because of his blatant and prideful declarations of being involved in gangs, Santini refused to comment.

It seems SDD now faces opposition from the government, the religious establishments, and possibly his own "brothers" in crime, who had established his musical career.

And because SDD will undoubtedly face more charges (including murder, grand theft auto, accessory to murder, manslaughter, accessory to manslaughter) most of his legal rights to his music have been suspended. In otehr words Records4Less still owns every song on the album Burrito Fuels Mi Corazon.

Where is SDD now? It is said that he is in government custody, however it is not fully confirmed by any reliable sources.

12-03-2004, 07:50

-Hamilton, NGUUEC

The second single from the Bankshot Blue's upcoming Felicity's Towel album was released today, this new song called "Wolfe Island Ferry" after the island that sits across that the channel from the city of Kingston, where the band hails from. Also, the track list has been finalized, and has also been released. -AP

Track List
"She Cries"
"Bottle of Booze"
"Particle Board"
"New Car Smell"
"Wolfe Island Ferry"
"I Pulled My Groin"
"The Coffee Song"
"Jesus' Brother Bob"
"The Ballad of Dan"
"Tokyo Love Song"
"The Last Sensative Cowboy"
"The Credit Song"
"Losing Hair Under God"

"The Wolfe Island Ferry"*

[chorus]
Oh the Wolfe Island Ferry is a very nice ferry
It's a very nice ferry it's the Wolfe Island Ferry
The Wolfe Island Ferry is a very nice ferry
It's a very nice ferry it's the Wolfe Island Ferry

General Wolfe beat General Montcalm on the Plans of Abraham
And because of this the liked him an awful lot in Kingston
But the town was named Kingston in the county of Frontenac
So they spotted an island and they called it Wolfe Island.

[chorus]

It's got a couple of highways and really nice restaurant
Called the General Wolfe and it's named after General Wolfe
Who won a couple of battles and had an island named after him
It's a really nice place and a good port to smuggle booze in from the
States

[chorus]

Oh the Wolfe Island Ferry dosn't carry any wolves
Or any sort of animals except a couple of seagulls
Who are really lazy so they ride on they ferry
and that way they don't have to fly all the way to Wolfe Island

Oh the Wolfe Island Ferry dosn't carry any faires
Cause faires unlike seagulls don't really mind the flying
They fly over to Wolfe Island sprinkling fairy dust all over
But it's really more like battery acid so you burn your skin untill
you die

Oh they got a lot of potatoes and Anne of Green Gables
oh crap that's Prince Edward Island
Sometimes I get confused when I switch my medication
But I can see the bunny.

[chorus x2]

(Notes: The song is a very upbeat, fast song, sung solo by Ted. Includes limited guitar and precussion accompanyment.)

*Note: Song orginally done by the Arrogant Worms. I'm an uncreative dog, I know! But, as I doubt many of you have heard of 'em, so that justifies it, right?

Blargia

13-03-2004, 16:56

Ok here's a bio of the hit emo band from Blargia. The Theory of Eating the World Tommorow. The band members are
Thomas"Tom" Anderson-Main vocals/guitars
Yuri "Yu" Jackson-bass/backup vocals
James"Jimmy"Anderson-drums/barely any backup vocals
Kenneth"Kenny" Jarickson-guitars/some vocals.
Albert"Al"Smith-keyboards/very few back up vocals

Genre:Emo, Indie Rock, Punk-pop
Record label:Small Branch Records
Band Age:About 5 years(If age of band members, Yuri is 21, Tom and Jim are 19, Kenny is 20, Al is 17)

Hailing from Maranan City which is home to a large emo scene are these 4 young men who are destined for success in the indie rock world. They are heavily emo influenced and they have more than one hits like "Understanding in a plane crash" and their famous rendition of the Thursday song, "Standing on the Edge of Summer". The are signed onto Small Branch Records, one of the most respected indie labels in all of Blargia. The band plans on touring in international countries.
The twins Jimmy and Tom while growning up were listening to a lot of Fugazi and Rites of Spring music. They soon eventually discovered more emo bands and well they are influenced by a lot of them. The bassist, Yuri met the twins while in high school American football game. They first talked during the game about the music they like and found out that they had the same influences. When the twins found out that Yuri is a bassist, they were really happy because they always had a dream of being in a band they would get their chance. They soon formed the band, The Theory of Eating the World Tommorrow in 1999 and eventually, Kenny, a childhood friend of Tom who had the same influences and joined the band after because after his old band disbanded, he had no where to go. After the band was formed, they were playing in Tom and Kenny's garages working their asses off waiting for people who would care to listen to their sound. About 20 people came one day and they really liked the music. A representative of Small Branch Records went to see them just to see if they could sign a local act to a indie record label. He was really impressed and asked the guys if they could do a demo. The head of Small Branch Records heard the demo and he really liked it. The station 4.543 REX FM which was an indie station played their demo and many people liked it. Soon the band would release a lot of 7" EPs and LPs which would become popular. Eventually they made cds called"The Red Album" and "Breakups and Makeups". A friend of Yuri who is a really good keyboardist decided to join the band just in time to go on tour and record on their new album(he also makes the band have a lil more sounding like Thursday). The band is currently working on their 3rd album called, "The Many faces of people" while on tour at the same time(they are recording in their tour bus). It is expected to be due around this August. Many of the lyrics which Tom sings about is about his lost love, crushes, tragedies, cheating, politics. This band sings it all.

Influences:Fugazi, Thursday, Something Corporate, Bright Eyes, Cursive, The Who, Weezer, Jets to Brazil, Jawbreaker, Rites of Spring, The Get Up Kids, Dashboard Confessional, The Good Life, Desaperacidos, Mineral, At The Drive In, etc.

Lyrics: Understanding in a plane crash.(From "The Red Album")
*drums play eighth note and guitars and bass comes in after and 30 seconds later, the lyrics come in*

Splintered piece of metal falls in the water, drowns
I can smell death in me just like a bloodhound
The flight has crashed in the sea
I feel death inside of me

[Chorus]
Time to end this flight(time it takes time it takes to let go)
Time runs out of sight(ditto)

Staring at the blue sky,
knowing that I cant fly high anymore
I know that time is now gone
I know that our hope is gone
Why couldn't we survive this flight?
We know that we could've might.

[repeat Chorus]

Now our dead bodies are really here
Our souls really fear
If we either go to heaven or hell
We haven't even got a Dell

[repeat Chorus]

*guitar solo for 45 seconds*

I dont wanna end this flight right now(understanding in a plane crash!!!)
I dont wanna say how ended up this way right now(in a plane crash!!!)
In a crash!!!

Sorry I'm not very good at song writing.
the parentheses mean the back up vocals.
"So is our music good enough to be on the coast to coast list?"----Tom

Kaze Progressa

13-03-2004, 18:44

Blargia

13-03-2004, 19:33

ooc: If you're no good at songwriting... then pity the rest of us...

IC: Monaa are set to release a second single from their chart-topping album No Reason to Cry, No Reason to Smile in the next few weeks. In a live set for Progressa Music, they kept fans guessing by performing two songs from the album, ostensibly to showcase the contrasting vocals of Kata Macaga and Davae Hawl - the former providing a soaring rendition of How Things Really Are (http://www.freewebs.com/kazeprogressa/How%20Things%20Really%20Are.bmp), the latter an angst-laden cover of Mad World. Some suspect a double A-side could be in prospect, especially as Monaa have previous history of releasing a cover/original double A-side (Let's Make It For Ourselves/Medication). Curiously, the former was also the last truly cheerful Monaa song to be released as a single.

[OOC again: click that blue link for the (incomplete) manuscript of How Things Really Are.]
So am I good(for an emo song writer)? BTW, we need at least 5 bands to tour with us in Blargian Warped Tour(Sponsored by Zans) this Summer.(Note: bands need to be either Punk, Emo, Ska, Metal to perform). Here are the tour dates:
June 21-Maranan City at the Sringler Fairgrounds
July 4- Dorin City at the Georgian Amphitheater
July 19- Dannerville at the Danerville meadows
July 24- Jorgeton at the Fullercan Center
August 3- Korin City at the George E. Washiton Pavillion
August 14- Darrin City at the Maranan meadows
August 30- Horryton at the Horryton Fairgrounds
Each person going there will get a free 2 cd set which has at least 1 track from every band performing.

Kaze Progressa

14-03-2004, 10:41

Blargia

14-03-2004, 14:12

OOC: yes, you are. Good luck in the Jukes - we need some more new blood.

IC: The Taqizerr Festival is set to take place on March 27/28. The second day will be headlined by Monaa, and other Progressan acts are performing including pop-rock heroes Athletico Sloucho - currently topping the charts in Kaze Progressa with anti-sport anthem I Don't Really Care - and heavy punk-rock acts Multiple Head Wounds and Milgram Experiment.

There is room for several international bands to join the festival, including a headline act for the 27th (at present, the headliners are Multiple Head Wounds, who are seen as relatively small fry for a festival this size).

The following weekend, the Quarua Festival takes place. Again, there is room for international acts to join a line up that has a quieter look than Taqizerr's, led by sultry jazz singer/pianist Itasae Murritko and acoustic guitar duo Chalk and Cheese.
My indie rock/emo band will be happy to go on tour in the festival. It will be the first time that they have toured outside of Blargia. They really wanna show people in other nations about what they're made of. They would go even if they don't get money because they're doing it for the music and fans. Not the money but they don't really care how much they're paid.
"So where do we sign the contract to go the the Quarua Festival?"---Tom

Kaze Progressa

14-03-2004, 14:41

We will gratefully accept The Theory of Eating The World Tomorrow for the Quarua Festival. Simply choose a stage and day.

And for that purpose, for both festivals...

Taqizerr Festival lineup
The North Stage is for rock/indie acts - other genres from pop to rap go on the South Stage.

SATURDAY:

NORTH STAGE
Multiple Head Wounds
Milgram Experiment
plus two international acts

SOUTH STAGE
Daddy C00l and the 1337 Disco Kings
The Polysyllabic Posse
The Uranium Girls
plus one international act

SUNDAY:

NORTH STAGE
Monaa
Athletico Sloucho
The Theory of Eating The World Tomorrow
plus one other international act

SOUTH STAGE
DJ Gateway
Electrogoalz
Miss Jiggy
Power 2 Da K

Quarua Festival lineup
The Lakeside Stage is the outdoor stage and is used by lively rock and pop artists; the Hillside Stage is covered, and a more laid-back style prevails.

SATURDAY:

LAKESIDE STAGE
The Theory of Eating The World Tomorrow
Saint Alan Belmores
The Fatal Four
plus two international acts

HILLSIDE STAGE
Itasae Murritko
Florence Laughlin
The Airwaves
plus one international act

SUNDAY:

LAKESIDE STAGE
Spike Poisons
Turbo Justice and the Fatal Hammers
Subhuman Spider Army
Extreme Toetappers

HILLSIDE STAGE
Chalk and Cheese
The Mythic Miranda
plus two international acts

This list last edited to add The Theory of Eating The World Tomorrow

Blargia

14-03-2004, 15:02

We wanna play in the Lakeside stage where the bands are at least rock so just chose a stage which has indie rock bands. We also wanna play in the Taquizzer(sp.) festival (in the North Stage)so we wanna play there as well cause were an indie band. So were gonna go to both festivals.

The SLAGLands

15-03-2004, 19:36

THE JUKEBOX CHARTS!
Week 16 Sales:
1. Flunk Republic - I Pledge Allegiance To The Flunk Republic
LAST WEEK: #6
2. Youthanasia - Eternal Animosity
LAST WEEK: n#1
3. The Mudskippers - The Mudskippers
LAST WEEK: #4
4. Dodge - uprooted
LAST WEEK: n/a
5. Monaa - No Reason To Cry, No Reason To Smile
LAST WEEK: #3
6. The Trapeze Accidents - Ballpark Figure
LAST WEEK: #5
7. Sangre De Derramamiento - Burrito Fuels Mi Corazon
LAST WEEK: #7
8. Slaya Hater - Placebo Casino
LAST WEEK: #2
9. The Theory of Eating the World Tomorrow - The Red Album
LAST WEEK: n/a
10. CDH - Never Tired Of Crying
LAST WEEK: #9
11. Various Artists - You Heard It Here First Volume XV
LAST WEEK: #8
12. Crimson Sedition - Granite Reflection
LAST WEEK: #10
13. Green Machine - Soylent Green
LAST WEEK: #12
14. The Explodinators - The Yellow Album
LAST WEEK: #14
15. Suite Meets - Modern Mythology... Music!
LAST WEEK: #8
16. Dead Lamas - Sell Out and S*** Me, B*****s
LAST WEEK: #16
17. Kings in a Gutter - What!?
LAST WEEK: #15
18. The Trapeze Accidents - Lords of the Ring--Live!
LAST WEEK: #13
19. Hollow Point - Jacketted
LAST WEEK: #17
20. Three Word Name - Stop the Pop!
LAST WEEK: #20

COMMENTS: Who would've thought that the frequent touring would finally pay off? Flunk Republic finally manages to catapult their album up five spots to take the top of the charts! Look for Dodge or The Mudskippers to make a bid for the top spot next week!

1. The Mudskippers - "He's So Smart"
LAST WEEK: #1
2. Slaya Hater - "Midnight Breakfast"
LAST WEEK: #2
3. The Bankshot Blues - "She Cries"
LAST WEEK: n/a
4. The Theory of Eating the World Tomorrow - "Understanding in a Plane Crash"
LAST WEEK: n/a
5. Youthanasia - "Past Mistakes"
LAST WEEK: #3
6. Hollow Point - "Lift"
LAST WEEK: n/a
7. Flunk Republic - " Love Spatula"
LAST WEEK: #7
8. Sangre De Derramamient - "I Wish I Had A Burrito"
LAST WEEK:
9. Dodge - "Ragged"
LAST WEEK: #6
10. Monaa - "See The Light"
LAST WEEK: #5
11. CDH - "Never Tired Of Crying"
LAST WEEK: #9
12. The Trapeze Accidents - "Orion"
LAST WEEK: #6
13. Suite Meets - "Let Me Hear You (Rocket)"
LAST WEEK: #11
14. Sangre De Derramamient - "Grande Pedro Perro G"
LAST WEEK: #10
15. The Mudskippers - "As The Crowe Flies"
LAST WEEK: #8
16. Hollow Point - "Breaking the Illusion"
LAST WEEK: #13
17. Crimson Sedition - "Blind Guardian of No More"
LAST WEEK: #12
18. Kings in a Gutter - "I'm Swell"
LAST WEEK: #14
19. CDH - "Love's Burning a Hole in My Pockete"
LAST WEEK: #16
20. Youthanasia - "Tracy the Class Whore"
LAST WEEK: #17

COMMENTS: In a week that saw the debut of more new singles than any in recent memory, The Mudskippers and Slaya Hater have somehow managed to cling to the top two positions, with The Bankshot Blues and TToEtWT nipping at their heels. Either of these two bands is poised to take the top spot next week, so stay tuned!

Blargia

15-03-2004, 22:09

The Theory of Eating the World Tomorrow has hit no. 2 this week with their cover of the song "Margin Walker" by Fugazi. Ian Mackaye(The ex-singer of Minor Threat and founder of the "Straight Edge" lifestyle) and Guy Picciotto(The man sang for Rites of Spring[the first emo band] and eventually joined Fugazi with one of his ex RoS members) has granted this band permission to cover this song and Ian and Tom are really good friends so here are the lyrics. The song sounds the same instrumentally but the voices (of course) sound the same.
Here's the lyrics http://plyrics.com/fugazi/marginwalker.html

16-03-2004, 07:51

AP Wire - Bankshot Blues announce Canuckistani tour

In support of their first release, Felicity's Towel, due out this Tuesday, the Bankshot Blues have announced that they will be headlining this year's annual touring Folkfest concert series, with stops in Hamilton, Kingston, Kamloops, Gander, Victoria, amongst at least a dozen other smaller cities over then coming three months. Presently they are co-headliners, sharing this year's spotlight with perrenial Canuckistani favourite The Hamilton Good Band. Also, the Folkfest is featuring popular comedian Kennedy Birch, along with a troupe of other comedians, stage performers, and indy bands. -AP

The SLAGLands

16-03-2004, 08:36

The Theory of Eating the World Tomorrow has hit no. 2 this week with their cover of the song "Margin Walker" by Fugazi.

OOC: First of all... not on this chart, it didn't.

Second of all... how about an original song? Thus far, you've given us one Thursday cover, one Fugazi cover, and one blatant ripoff of a Thursday song with lyrics only slightly altered and the title even less slightly altered. :P

Blargia

16-03-2004, 11:33

Tom- A good friend of mine named Jared passed away last week after doing O.D. on meth and heroin(he combined the two which killed him) because he was soo depressed. He was a man a year younger than me and he was a good friend. I wrote this song after his death and it's the song on the new album coming out on August called "The Many Faces of People". Here are the lyrics(BTW, the song sounds a mix of Thursday and Brand New but I wrote it by myself). The song is called Jared's song.

Today, is a really sad day
No one is saying "hooray!!!"
I lost a piece of me
Which I can still see
My friend Jared has just passed away
I was shocked, sad, and filled with dismay

[chorus]
All I can see
Is all but one piece of me
My friend got really high
My friend is gone and so I cry

My good friend Jared was happy as he can be
His girlfriend before his death has his favorite as you can see
When he would break up with his girlfriends, s***ty things happened
But when he and his current girlfriend broke up it soon signaled the end

[chorus]

After he and his girlfriend broke up his parents abused him and bullies teased Jared
Even some of my friends teased Jared.
A drug dealer eventually convinced him to give him f***ing heroin and meth
Jared idmedeatly(sp.) never realized that it will trigger his death.
Prior to his death he acted weird and crazy
He felt really hazy

[chorus]

When I went to his funeral
Outside was a mural
Filled with pictures of teenagers who die from heroin and meth
Jared was one of the pictures who had the death
So kids listen to what I say, do not do drugs
If you are depressed, you need a big hug
If your parents are abusive go to your guidance counselor
You can also go to your teacher

We miss you Jared *cries*

ok, well is this good enough, j/w?
P.S. the covered Fugazi song is no. 2 IN the Blargian charts ok.

Amerigo

20-03-2004, 04:42

Crimson Sedition releases its newest album, A Clockwork Orange. The album has already been released within Amerigo, and has dominated the charts in Amerigo.

ALBUM NAME: A Clockwork Orange
TRACK LIST:
Disk 1--
1. Beethoven (2:49) (performed entirely by The Borleone Symphony Orchestra)
2. At the Korova Milkbar (2:01)
3. Ultraviolence (feat. Fetal Discharge) (4:09)
4. Muse (7:38) (feat. The Borleone Symphony Orchestra)
5. Rape of the Muse (2:41)
6. My Droogs (5:30)
7. Betrayed (9:18) (feat. The Borleone Symphony Orchestra and Choir)
8. Prison Peace (4:38)
9. Normalization (9:20)
10. Clockwork Orange (7:10)
11. Intermission (1:00)

Disc 2
1. The Journey (14:28)
2. Horror (14:32)
3. Bathed in the Blood (13:06) (feat. Wallace Banson)
4. Relief (5:53)
5. Wilting of the Soul (9:04)
6. Normalization II (18:41)
7. Thanks (1:05)

CRITICAL COMMENTS: This album has been long in the making--some songs have been created long before the previous album, Granite Reflection. This is definately a great experiment for the band. This album is their homage to one of the greatest directors of all time, Stanely Kubrik, and it honors one of Kubrik's masterpieces, A Clockwork Orange, (the movie, not the original book, on which the movie is based). This massive project involved the collaboration of both the Borleone Symphony Orchestra and Choir, the death metal band, Fetal Discharge, and a legendary Amerigan blues singer Wallace Banson.

The album follows closely to the plot and in many songs uses the Russian/British bastardized slang used frequently in the movie. It is quite obvious that the band put a lot of work into creating this two disc album, and were not afraid to open themselves to performing many different musical genres to bolseter the incredibly diverse sound of the album.

The first song is a sort of introduction and is done completely by the Borleone Symphony Orchestra--Crimson Sedition does not so much say a word throughout the short piece. This musical piece somehow manages to integrate several of Beethoven's musical works into an incredibly short time--and very beautifully so I may add. The slow guitar riffs of the next song At the 'Korova Milkbar', seems to very well manifest the mood of the opening scene of A Clowork Orange--no vocals are involved, only a strange brooding metallic sound. The next song, "Ultraviolence" is a sudden change in sound--it is loud abrupt and death metallic. Is it a wonder that Fetal Discharge participated in this song's creation? However, the thought behind the song is carried out very nicely--the song stays true to its title as it is very much ultraviolent.

The songs in general on the first disk tend to in a way contrast each other throughout. There are many brooding sad melodies, follwed by heavy metal. The most notable song on the first disc is "Normalization", this song seems to combine almost every music genre that has ever existed. The song begins with an eerily disturbing carnival music and progresses into thrash metal, then suddenly reverts to polka, then enters power metal, then celtic music, then classical, then doom metal, then power metal, then jazz, followed by heavy metal and then proceeds to a strange tribal drumming and chants, progresses slowly into doom metal again and then enters progressive death metal--very loud, discordant, and for lack of any other words... hardcore. Soon, a strange jazz sound begins to penetrate and the whole scrambled melody continues for a minute, until it slows down and ends with some faint violins playing. It is indeed very experimental, and very meaningful to some, while quite confusing to others.

The second disc, is much less intense. Acousitic guitars and Grimm's shrill vocals charecterize most songs. The second disc is very moving and emotional in many songs, especially "Bathed in Blood", which offers an interesting change in vocals to the legendary Banson's low brassy sound. There are less songs on the second disc but each song is very long usually--at times painfully long.

However all together this album shows that the band is willing to experiment to make this album unique and very emotional. The problem is perhaps they are constrained by the fact that they are labeling it Clockwork Orange and thus at times it seems forced. However, this album is a robust follow up to Granite Reflection.

SINGLE NAME: Clockwork Orange
LYRICS:

Each day that passes by our lives
Each morning sun that meets our eyes
Is wasted

Gone

The days are slipping by your fingers
Like grains of sand
And every day your spirit lingers

A day is wasted of your life

*INSTRUMENTAL*

Just gears in the machination
That speeds toward its destination
We lubricate the garish wheels
We are but pawns

Order order order
Upon the wicked plains
Structure, order, order
That tower on your pains

The machine that crawls destroys
And poisons living life unlived

An individual can't stop it
Can't make it
Control it
Break it

Just gears
Just gears

We spin around our timed journey
We sing the songs of our folly
We never see
We never see

Our lives expended for the fire
To mend its cogs, and feed desire

***

And the fire of chaos
That burns within our hearts
It's churning glowing light
The individual delight

A forbidden fruit of anarchy
That sings to our praises!

And everywhere that Sentinel
That crushes and destroys

***

Order, order, order
The patterns of our lives
Order, order, order
That leaves our streaming eyes

Each day we waste for another thing to speed the machine onward
And everytime our minds do think there'll be another day
And everyday that we seek to accomplish for the common good
To leave a legacy of greatness behind our livelyhood
And that day that we struggle
Can never return
And everytime you turn around

The pattern takes you
Spin round
You are a gear
In the Clockwork world of the machine

NationStates Jolt Archive

Billco Co. Presents... The Jukebox Charts! - Page 2