NationStates Jolt Archive

(A cartoon image of an old woman appears on the screen. She is wearing a blue apron. She has a monstrous head and horn-rimmed glasses. She's holding a wooden spoon covered in chocolate.)

Hey, kids! It's your old pal Granny Slag!

(The camera turns to a bunch of kids eating pudding around a table. They all have grossed-out looks on their faces.)

Are you tired of gross, thin, flavorless pudding?

(The kids all nod--naturally.)

Don't you wish somebody knew how to do pudding right?

(The kids all nod again. A little Granny Slag cartoon hops across the table, followed by a trail of magical sparkles. The sparkles transform the pudding cups into Granny Slag's Homestyle Puddin'.)

Then try Granny Slag's Homestyle Puddin'!

(The kids dig in. They smile and raise a thumbs up. The camera then goes back to Granny Slag bouncing against a colorful background.)

Granny Slag's Homestyle Puddin' is made from only the best all-natural ingredients. It's made right here in The SLAGLands by hometown folks who understand what kids like you want!

(The camera switches to a group of chefs wearing huge hats. One of them is raising a spoon to his mouth. He tastes, then gives a thumbs up. The other chefs join him. Back to Granny Slag.)

Granny Slag's Homestyle Puddin' now comes in ten fun flavors: chocolate, vanilla, butterscotch, tapioca, banana, lemon, strawberry, S'mores, chocolate peanut butter, and fudge!

(The camera switches now to a big pile of all the varieties of Granny Slag's Homestyle Puddin' sitting on a table. The cartoon Granny Slag is leaning against them.)

So try Granny Slag's Homestyle Puddin' today: it's so good, it must be GODMODing!

(And here comes the catchy jingle:)

Grab a box of Granny Slag's;
She's got great taste in the bag!

What would happen if we were to say...launch this pudding in a scud style missile at another nation?

MMMMMMMMMMMMMM pudding,poutine and godmodders. The best tasting things in the world

What would happen if we were to say...launch this pudding in a scud style missile at another nation?

Megatons and megatons of sweet, creamy goodness!

You would spread joy to the children of that nation by sharing the goodness of the pudding with them.

What would happen if we were to say...launch this pudding in a scud style missile at another nation?

Megatons and megatons of sweet, creamy goodness!You are insane! I like you. A want one megaton of sweet, creamy goodness!!! *looks at sky and opens mouth*

What would happen if we were to say...launch this pudding in a scud style missile at another nation?

Megatons and megatons of sweet, creamy goodness!

droool

This is Thress. Liaison to Warlord Kraah of the Dominion of Sakkra.

We are intrigued by your Granny Slag's Pudding. We would like to sample the Tapioca, if you please. It is the Warlords favorite treat before the weekly Jugg matches. But it must be done in secret. If he found out, I would have my head on a post in the match.

What would happen if we were to say...launch this pudding in a scud style missile at another nation?

Megatons and megatons of sweet, creamy goodness!You are insane! I like you. A want one megaton of sweet, creamy goodness!!! *looks at sky and opens mouth*

::loads Granny Slag's Homestyle Puddin' into the Really Freakin' Huge Cannon of Justice and fires::

Mmmmm... strawberry pudding...

Send me five cases of strawberry pudding, please. I'll fire the I.G.N.O.R.E. cannon if you don't.

And yes, I will pay. This isn't an extortion racket. Not a good one, at least.

Advisor Speaker-to-Animals
International Relations Section
Federation of Scolopendra

::slips Sakkra a cup of tapioca under the counter::

~

And here YOU go, Scol. That'll be $6.25 American.

(OOC: Would you consider it GODMODing if I said this pudding is delicious?)

Give me vanilla and do you have a flavour that can mask a poison. Just asking in case I need to asasinate another forein leader. Not likely :wink: except for Bisconia Anditopia and all the nations in a coalition against me.

Surely we must protect this technology from falling into the wrong hands!
Only by bringing scrumptious, mouth-watering security measures into place
can we protect the world's weapons of mass deliciousness. Protect the pudding, O Granny Slag, from those who would make the world taste bland. :lol:

::slips Sakkra a cup of tapioca under the counter::

~

And here YOU go, Scol. That'll be $6.25 American.

(OOC: Would you consider it GODMODing if I said this pudding is delicious?)

The money is yours.

Speaker-to-Animals

*And now for something completely different...

A Kzinti eating pudding!

(Which is, by the way, delicious... you God-Moding bastard...)

*And now...

Number 3...

The Larch.

The LA-rch.

:::Thress prostrates before Warlord Kraah, holding the cup of Granny Slags Tapioca Pudding. Kraah grabs the pudding, tells a tester to taste for harmful toxins. Finding none, Kraah samples the pudding.:::

Kraah:"By the Scales of Keroon! This is a true delicacy! I insist that five cases be sent here AT ONCE! I must have enough of this treat to last me the two days of Jugg matches!"


This is Thress. Warlord Kraah would like five cases of Granny Slags Pudding in the flavor of Tapuioca sent to the Dominion. Please tell us any compensation you require, or we could trade for an equal amount of Sakkra Slurpee.

Give me vanilla and do you have a flavour that can mask a poison. Just asking in case I need to asasinate another forein leader. Not likely :wink: except for Bisconia Anditopia and all the nations in a coalition against me. UM can poisons be slipped in without notice? I'll pay extra if they can.

<Communications to the SLAGLands>
{
<< Well, I just got new taste sensors installed in my avatars thanks to KarmaCorp TechSystems (shameless plug) and for my first test would like to try the chocolate pudding. Chocolate has been almost universally recommended by everyone I've asked.
}

http://www.womengamers.com/dw/sshock2_rev.jpg
S.H.O.D.A.N. v3.0 : MCP, Q01

---Post deleted by NationStates Moderators---

I have deemed this too good for my citizens to enjoy. Therefore all of the substance purchased by my nation must be consumed by me. I must, however, regrettably order 6 tonnes of Granny Slags pudding and eat it in front of my entire empire.

The Great Ineffable Bob, Supreme Ruler of The Dominion of The Silver Turtle , Political head of GDODAD and puppetmaster of Fred Skullcrusher (Supreme Warlord of Warmongering Evildoers)

Celack, the sweet taste of banana will mask the poisons you seek to imbibe in others. However, we can't add the poisons ourselves. What you do with your pudding is your own business.

::sends Sakkra five cases:: $6.25, sir.

S.H.O.D.A.N., I would be honored to send you a free sample of Granny Slag's Homestyle Chocolate Puddin' for your first ever tasting of... uh... anything.

Sephirus... done.

Sir Bob of the Infinite Titles, 6 tonnes comin' your way. That'll be $10,000.

Celack, the sweet taste of banana will mask the poisons you seek to imbibe in others. However, we can't add the poisons ourselves. What you do with your pudding is your own business.

::sends Sakkra five cases:: $6.25, sir.

S.H.O.D.A.N., I would be honored to send you a free sample of Granny Slag's Homestyle Chocolate Puddin' for your first ever tasting of... uh... anything.

Sephirus... done.

Sir Bob of the Infinite Titles, 6 tonnes comin' your way. That'll be $500. Thank you I will take 300 crates

300 crates at 20 cases apiece headed your way. That'll be $7,000. (He saved $500 from buying in bulk! Ye gods!)

alright here you go. If you could make a carrot flavoured one then you will have a contract with our military.

alright here you go. If you could make a carrot flavoured one then you will have a contract with our military.

W00T!

::Granny Slag buys a new apron.::

Carrots, eh? We'll have to think about that. Give us a few days.

The S.H.O.D.A.N. avatar (described in detail elsewhere), after washing her hands thoroughly, gingerly takes the cup of Granny Slag's Homestyle Chocolate Puddin' and a spoon proffered to her by vonKarma [OOC: hell, everything else is happening in the room, so why not this]. Looking somewhat awkwardly at the cup, she dips the spoon into it and pulls out a moderately-sized gob.

After blinking a few times and closing her eyes, she stuck the spoon in her mouth.

<Communications to SLAGLands>
{
<< Thank you greatly... we now have a national food.

<< How about this, a commodity trade... five thousand metric tons of Granny Slag's Homestyle Chocolate Puddin' in exchange for an equal amount of Kilobyte Kola. Interested?
}

http://www.womengamers.com/dw/sshock2_rev.jpg
S.H.O.D.A.N. v3.0 : MCP, Q01

Is Granny Slag a double agent? I think Ive seen her pushing laxatives also! Buyer beware! :shock:

S.H.O.D.A.N.... deal.

::ships out a buncha pudding crates::

And no, Granny Slag is not a double agent. You're obviously thinking after Grampa Slag's Stool Sweetener... you'll be so regular, you'll swear it's GODMODing!

they look similar. Could grampa slag be a cross dresser?

<Communications to the SLAGLands>
{
[image transmission:
*hundreds of simple nonsentient robots stack thousands of cube-shaped cases labeled in bright colors into hundreds of dropships*]

<< I like deals.
}

http://www.womengamers.com/dw/sshock2_rev.jpg
S.H.O.D.A.N. v3.0 : MCP, Q01

WMNK members, IM me. (automagfreek)

What Grampa Slag does on his own time is his own business!

Our currency changers have transferred 6.25 to your coffers. May your teeth ever be sharp.

Um, SHODAN, are you sure its a good idea to eat pudding while performing neurosurgery?

I'll help you out with your quadruple posts SLAG.

The Principality would like to order 20 metric tons of each of the following flavors of pudding: vanilla, butterscotch, tapioca, and fudge, and 40 metric tons of strawberry.

President Vash is also curious about Ganny making prehaps a donut pudding, or just plain donuts. If she makes donuts, he would like to order a metric ton of these as well.

Thank you.

Mmmm... I'd like to order a case of tapioca, a case of S'mores, a case of fudge, and a case of vanilla.

Also a case of every kind for the Eternal Thread Room. Danke schoen!

::sends the requested amounts to Sirmio and Berserker... you guys can calculate the price yourselves...::

A pleasure doing business! Don't forget to get some Kilobyte Kola from S.H.O.D.A.N.!

*Tries like mad to figue out how much to pay, gives up, and ends up grossly overpaying by something like 300%*

I hate math.

mmmmmmmmmmmmmmm kilobyte kola and *bump.

Chocolate IMPROVES performance in neurosurgery.

Wait... um... what surgery... er... I like cute kittens.

And NO, I'm NOT an addict...

"Kilobyte Kola... put a spark in your day!"

Flavors:
- Standard cola
- Cherry cola
- Vanilla cola (two subsets, "Kinda Vanilla" and "That's A Lot Of Vanilla")
- Lemon cola (two subsets, "Moderately Vanilla" and "PING!!!")
- Various fruits

All flavors are fortified with astounding amounts of vitamins and the like, making them actually nutritious... well, S.H.O.D.A.N.'s not trying to give anyone diabetes or rot their teeth.

:shock: Um.... Let's hope S.H.O.D.A.N. never ever tries pocky o.o;;

:shock: Um.... Let's hope S.H.O.D.A.N. never ever tries pocky o.o;;
(OOC: Is a RL Pocky addict... especially strawberry)

Wot's "Pocky?"

((OOC: LOL! Pocky is the best, ain't it? :lol: ))

Pocky is... something of a form of Japanese junk food. It consists of a slender 'stick' of biscuit ((OOC: I think that's what the box said... been awhile since I last had some :cry: )), that is then dipped in chocolate or some other flavored frosting. It's an excellent munchie. ^_^

*goes off to find this... "Pocky..."*

(OOC: I think I just found the recurring joke for the upcoming sannyasi thread.)

Oh dear, what have I done?

((OOC: Oro!))

Oh no if he finds Pocky he might find another jappaneese food....SUSHI...EWWWWWWWWW robotic sushi. *shudder

Oh no if he finds Pocky he might find another jappaneese food....SUSHI...EWWWWWWWWW robotic sushi. *shudder

SHE... I like to think of myself as female.

--S.H.O.D.A.N.

(OOC: I like sushi)

Oh no if he finds Pocky he might find another jappaneese food....SUSHI...EWWWWWWWWW robotic sushi. *shudder

SHE... I like to think of myself as female.

--S.H.O.D.A.N. sorry I was thinking you were but after the longest thread ever I was not sure about anybody. :oops:

(OOC: But I'm not... female, that is... heh heh heh

I love what RP genderbending does to people's minds...)

O.O.C. That means my president can be a trans- and bi-seuaxal hyper evovled rabbit?

O.O.C. That means my president can be a trans- and bi-seuaxal hyper evovled rabbit?
(OOC: *shrugs* What the hell... why not?)

O.O.C. yeah!!!!!!!!!!!

Must have pudding!

Granny Slag's AND Kilobyte Kola are sold at your local ScoloMart.

Buy from them!

Whoa, my thread got bumped! Several times! W00t!

Heh heh... ScoloMart...

A classic.

TM, SLAGGY. This one isn't mod stuff, I promise you.

And it's not on this topic.

Like I said on the first page of this thread. Your insane. I like that.

Oh and... send me anothermegaton of creamy pudding goodness. *opens mouth at sky* :P

TM, SLAGGY. This one isn't mod stuff, I promise you.

And it's not on this topic.

Replied.

TM, SLAGGY. This one isn't mod stuff, I promise you.

And it's not on this topic.

Replied.

Same here.

(That means I replied.) :wink:

Bump for no reason other than I like Pudding.

Bump for no reason other than I like Pudding.

More like, "Bump because this is the most important thread... ever." ;)

LOL!

Ya gotta love Granny Slag....

Notice this it is nothing at all like my post. :wink: