29-02-2004, 21:56
New Bermuda Decides:
Tourists on the Dinner Table?
Government Acts
The Issue:
In a bid to provide a new revenue stream for New Bermuda's Beef-Based Agriculture industry, it has been suggested that tourists could be added to the menu.
The Debate:
"The fact is, the tourist population is out of control," says Beef-Based Agriculture spokesperson Jack Frederickson. "We have to do something about them anyway, so why not market them as tasty snacks? We could have tourist kebabs, tourist pies, tourist-on-a-sticks--the possibilities are endless! Let's not pass up this golden opportunity to provide a feast, if you will, for our economy."
[Accept]
"I agree that something needs to be done about tourist over-population," says random passer-by Pip Steele, "but eating them? That's kind of gross. Let's just shoot the ones we have to and shovel their bodies into ditches like normal."
[Accept]
"I am shocked and appalled!" declared SPCA President Buy Steele. "If anyone needs to be culled, it's us humans. The tourists were here first, remember? We need to take this as a sign to get our industry--agriculture in particular--to back off. The tourist is part of what makes New Bermuda a great nation!"
[Accept]
Tourists on the Dinner Table?
Government Acts
The Issue:
In a bid to provide a new revenue stream for New Bermuda's Beef-Based Agriculture industry, it has been suggested that tourists could be added to the menu.
The Debate:
"The fact is, the tourist population is out of control," says Beef-Based Agriculture spokesperson Jack Frederickson. "We have to do something about them anyway, so why not market them as tasty snacks? We could have tourist kebabs, tourist pies, tourist-on-a-sticks--the possibilities are endless! Let's not pass up this golden opportunity to provide a feast, if you will, for our economy."
[Accept]
"I agree that something needs to be done about tourist over-population," says random passer-by Pip Steele, "but eating them? That's kind of gross. Let's just shoot the ones we have to and shovel their bodies into ditches like normal."
[Accept]
"I am shocked and appalled!" declared SPCA President Buy Steele. "If anyone needs to be culled, it's us humans. The tourists were here first, remember? We need to take this as a sign to get our industry--agriculture in particular--to back off. The tourist is part of what makes New Bermuda a great nation!"
[Accept]