NationStates Jolt Archive


This is uncalled for!

Magdha
12-05-2006, 06:05
http://forums.jolt.co.uk/showpost.php?p=10943219&postcount=10

This is extremely disrespectful and discriminatory toward people, like myself, who have AS. IMO, at the very least, a warning is in order.
GMC Military Arms
12-05-2006, 06:32
Ashliana is talking about three people he / she knew, not you and not all people with AS; there's no generalisation there that 'all people with AS are like this,' just 'I knew three people with AS and they were like this.' Calm down.
Pyromaniacal Scientist
12-05-2006, 06:39
Originally said by Ashliana:
They had absolutely no grasp of social cues or graces. They didn't bathe. They would stand extremely close to you. They didn't understand why people would get offended at the horrible things they said. And you couldn't teach them how to behave properly, because they didn't understand why what they were saying was wrong.


How can that not be seen as uncalled for? The manner in which she speaks is trolling and flaming in one!
GMC Military Arms
12-05-2006, 06:52
Because Ashliana was talking about experiences of three people he or she knew, not all people with AS. If it were 'all people with AS are like this' I'd understand, but it's not, it's 'I knew three people with AS and they were like this.'
Ashliana
12-05-2006, 06:57
Like the others said, I was describing my personal experiences, not every single person with the syndrome.

If there was anything that was uncalled for, it was your hasty attacks based on the ignorant assumption that I WAS.

YOU two were the ones who resorted to personal attacks and the usage of the word "fuck." Not me. Who's out of line? You.
Pyromaniacal Scientist
12-05-2006, 07:09
I'm sorry if I said the 'f' word Ashliana, but when someone personally attacks me by saying I am "... the most annoying people I've ever had the misfortune of meeting.", you've brought it on yourself. And if you really are going to spout prejudicial lines in and out, then I see no reason as to why you aren't warned. You've got no compassion towards people with Asperger's Syndrome, and this is shown by your manner of speaking.
Ashliana
12-05-2006, 07:14
I'm sorry if I said the 'f' word Ashliana, but when someone personally attacks me by saying I am "... the most annoying people I've ever had the misfortune of meeting.", you've brought it on yourself. And if you really are going to spout prejudicial lines in and out, then I see no reason as to why you aren't warned. You've got no compassion towards people with Asperger's Syndrome, and this is shown by your manner of speaking.

You still aren't reading. The words I used in my opening statements could not HAVE POSSIBLY BEEN DIRECTED TO YOU, AS YOU HADN'T EVEN POSTED by that point.

My words were not 'prejudicial.' They were based on experience, like I've said again and again. You really ought to read what people say instead of what you think they are saying.
Pyromaniacal Scientist
12-05-2006, 07:22
Look at it this way. I have Asperger's Syndrome. By insulting all people who have Asperger's Syndrome "...They were by far the most annoying people I've ever had the misfortune of meeting.", you've insulted me, Magdha, and everyone else who has either got Asperger's Syndrome, or has people they hold dear with Asperger's Syndrome. I've called you on it, and you still give back personal attacks. How can anything you've said not be seen as prejudicial, when you respond to people who prove you wrong by calling them "asshole", "jackass", and use several references to stupidity (even more condescending for the people who have low functioning asperger's syndrome)?
GMC Military Arms
12-05-2006, 07:23
I'm sorry if I said the 'f' word Ashliana, but when someone personally attacks me by saying I am "... the most annoying people I've ever had the misfortune of meeting."

For the third time, he didn't say that, he said three people he knew had AS and they were the 'the most annoying people I've ever had the misfortune of meeting.' That does not include you.

You're getting bent out of shape over something that never referred to you. Chill, now.
Ashliana
12-05-2006, 07:25
Look at it this way. I have Asperger's Syndrome. By insulting all people who have Asperger's Syndrome "...They were by far the most annoying people I've ever had the misfortune of meeting.", you've insulted me, Magdha, and everyone else who has either got Asperger's Syndrome, or has people they hold dear with Asperger's Syndrome. I've called you on it, and you still give back personal attacks. How can anything you've said not be seen as prejudicial, when you respond to people who prove you wrong by calling them "asshole", "jackass", and use several references to stupidity (even more condescending for the people who have low functioning asperger's syndrome)?

YOU STILL AREN'T READING.

You keep saying I'm insulting "every person" with the syndrome. I was talking about my experiences with the THREE PEOPLE I KNEW. How many times can I SAY THIS?

You can mis-read what I said a million times, it STILL doesn't make you right!

I responded to someone with the word "jackass" after they said what I wrote was "bullshit," when it wasn't. And I have NOT used the word "asshole"--you're just MAKING THINGS UP NOW.

In fact, it was YOU who called ME a "fucking asshole."

What -now-? Look at your own posts!
The Most Glorious Hack
12-05-2006, 07:26
Okay, English language syntax lesson here.

"I knew some frat boys in college. They were the loudest, drunkest, most worthless people I ever met."

"Frats boys are the loudest, drunkest, most worthless people I ever meet."

See the difference? When using past tense, the speaker is refering to people s/he knew in the past. It is a direct, specific reference to specific people. When speaking in present tense, the person is making a generalization about all people in a given group.

"Every woman I ever dated was a raving psycho," is not blasting all women everywhere; it is blasting a specific subset of women. Specifically, those I dated.

"Women are raving psychos," is a generalization about all women everywhere.

See the difference?
Pyromaniacal Scientist
12-05-2006, 07:36
When you made all the comments about the people with Asperger's being annoying, I found that very offensive. (same blatant stereotyping used by most people in society) From the tone of the message, it seemed that you were being derogatory to them. That's what I've been trying to say the whole time. Granted, I may not have said the best words.

For example, if I started being racist to any ethnicity, it's generally expected for someone to take offence. The same applies here. It's the blatant stereotyping and unwillingness to see any other point of view that is offensive. I'm sorry if you still don't see where I am coming from. I guess some people will generally care about themselves.

It's infuriating when someone doesn't try to see both sides of the argument, and I'm still not happy about it. Just next time, try to be more careful with your words, ok?
Ashliana
12-05-2006, 07:39
When you made all the comments about the people with Asperger's being annoying, I found that very offensive. (same blatant stereotyping used by most people in society) From the tone of the message, it seemed that you were being derogatory to them. That's what I've been trying to say the whole time. Granted, I may not have said the best words.

For example, if I started being racist to any ethnicity, it's generally expected for someone to take offence. The same applies here. It's the blatant stereotyping and unwillingness to see any other point of view that is offensive. I'm sorry if you still don't see where I am coming from. I guess some people will generally care about themselves.

It's infuriating when someone doesn't try to see both sides of the argument, and I'm still not happy about it. Just next time, try to be more careful with your words, ok?

I was talking about three specific people. I'm sorry if YOU couldn't see that. Let me make this perfectly clear: You are not one of the three people.

Some stereotypes have a basis in reality. I don't even know if how I described them were part of a larger stereotype--I was describing the people I personally knew.

As for not seeing both sides of the argument, it took two different mods and a neutral poster to get through to you. You and Magdha immediately jumped on me for not dumping praise on people with the syndrome--how is that for not wanting to see "both sides"? How about next time you be more careful with your reading?
GMC Military Arms
12-05-2006, 07:43
For example, if I started being racist to any ethnicity, it's generally expected for someone to take offence.

If I said 'I knew three guys from London who were total bastards' I wouldn't expect everyone from London to take offence. If I said 'Londoners are total bastards,' different story. Two moderators have pointed this out, and you have, so far, simply ignored tham.

It's infuriating when someone doesn't try to see both sides of the argument, and I'm still not happy about it.

We did. Ashliana's side was right and your side was wrong. You accused Ashliana of making a generalisation when Ashliana was only pointing out that three people behaved in a given manner. That is not flaming, and that is not trolling. Let it go.
Pyromaniacal Scientist
12-05-2006, 07:51
Unfortunately for me, I've had far too many people attack me on the premise of Asperger's Syndrome, and now I generally resent any form of negativity towards anyone with A.S. I've argued this so many times that your side's arguments can be categorized far too easily. Note, I didn't 'attack' you for "not dumping praise", but I 'attacked' you for the stereotypical cynicism towards people in the A.S. and the inability from you to see that the comments can be seen as offensive. It would be the same as if I stereotypically fitted you into the 'typical American' (btw, I'm not actually sure you are American) category; (just an example, I don't like to stereotype) because you weren't going to budge your viewpoint.

Are you able to see where I am coming from now? I've had too many people thoughtlessly make comment based on my A.S. for me not to be offended.
GMC Military Arms
12-05-2006, 07:59
I've had too many people thoughtlessly make comment based on my A.S. for me not to be offended.

Correct. You assumed bad intention from a point that was not directed at you, because you hastily assumed he was talking about everyone with AS and not three people with AS he knew.

People do act like stereotypes, that's why they exist. If I told you I had a friend called Hans and he liked to drink beer and had a moustache, that is me talking about Hans, not saying all Germans are beer-drinking moustache-having people. If I said I knew a guy called Kenichi who worked too hard and lived in a tiny house, I am talking about Kenichi, not about all Japanese people.

You need to grow a thicker skin. Yeah, you may had a rough ride, but assuming everyone in the world is out to insult you won't help matters.
Ashliana
12-05-2006, 08:00
Unfortunately for me, I've had far too many people attack me on the premise of Asperger's Syndrome, and now I generally resent any form of negativity towards anyone with A.S. I've argued this so many times that your side's arguments can be categorized far too easily. Note, I didn't 'attack' you for "not dumping praise", but I 'attacked' you for the stereotypical cynicism towards people in the A.S. and the inability from you to see that the comments can be seen as offensive. It would be the same as if I stereotypically fitted you into the 'typical American' (btw, I'm not actually sure you are American) category; (just an example, I don't like to stereotype) because you weren't going to budge your viewpoint.

Are you able to see where I am coming from now? I've had too many people thoughtlessly make comment based on my A.S. for me not to be offended.

Your personal experience, while regrettable, has absolutely nothing to do with me. Do you find the truth offensive?

If you told me you knew "three people named Ashliana, who were total jackasses," it would not bother me in the least. If you told me you knew "three people with brown hair who were drug addicts and didn't bathe," it would not phase me. Because that would be referring to specific people, and not myself.

It boils down to this; if you're offended by any negative discussion of people with Asperger's Syndrome, you probably shouldn't have looked in a thread about people's experiences with them.

Edit: To hell with this. I'm going to bed. Repeating myself isn't getting anybody anywhere.
Jocabia
12-05-2006, 16:15
Unfortunately for me, I've had far too many people attack me on the premise of Asperger's Syndrome, and now I generally resent any form of negativity towards anyone with A.S. I've argued this so many times that your side's arguments can be categorized far too easily. Note, I didn't 'attack' you for "not dumping praise", but I 'attacked' you for the stereotypical cynicism towards people in the A.S. and the inability from you to see that the comments can be seen as offensive. It would be the same as if I stereotypically fitted you into the 'typical American' (btw, I'm not actually sure you are American) category; (just an example, I don't like to stereotype) because you weren't going to budge your viewpoint.

Are you able to see where I am coming from now? I've had too many people thoughtlessly make comment based on my A.S. for me not to be offended.
Imagine I have a little brother who has cerebral palsy. I talk about how I feel like my whole life people focused on my little brother and not me and so I never got any support. I always had to take care of my brother when other people were out playing and rather than spending money on bikes and games everything went to his care. I hated having a brother with CP.

Suppose I said all of that in a thread about CP. Would I be insulting all people with CP or just complaining how the person I knew, my little brother, affected me? It's clear I'm just talking about the effects on my life or happiness people with CP had. Is it insensitive? Probably. If someone had CP, would it suck to hear someone talking about someone else with CP so selfishly? Yes, I'm pretty sure it would. Would one be unreasonable if one told me I'm being an asshole for generalizing about all people with CP? Yes. Undeniably so, because it never happened.

You're mad because you feel like people aren't seeing it from your side, but take a step back. They are. The problem is what you say happened, did not happen. Plus, you attacked another poster for it. He could have been more sensitve. You could have responded to what he wrote and not turned into every other person that's offended you in your life. He didn't. You didn't. Take a little responsibility for your part and move on.
Taxanarchia
12-05-2006, 16:37
Well, it's easy to see how Ashliana's statement could have been construed as having an implied generalization. For example, if it were a thread about people of African descent, if somebody said they knew three African people who were annoying, and then she never said that she's not saying for sure that all Africans are like that, somebody is likely to get offended.

So, I say, both sides of the argument admit you've made a mistake, and then let it go.
Valdania
12-05-2006, 16:59
So, I say, both sides of the argument admit you've made a mistake, and then let it go.

But only one side made a mistake, why should the other side concede?
Gelfland
12-05-2006, 19:51
exactly, if PS is in fact one of the persons mentioned, he would probably have been far better off just walking over and smacking ashlina one.
Dobbsworld
12-05-2006, 21:43
Talk about being annoying as all get-out... :p
Katganistan
12-05-2006, 23:51
Stick a fork in it, folks, we're done.

Bottom line: there is nothing to warn. Several of you may have taken offense, but nothing offensive was directed at you, nor was a generalization made about all people with Asperger's.