NationStates Jolt Archive


Trailer: "The Nerd War." (A Perimeter Defense Production)

Perimeter Defense
16-04-2009, 06:13
http://s195.photobucket.com/albums/z157/Flatterland/THENERDWAR.jpg

"Welcome to the Cadre," the man says as he leads a young girl into a massive auditorium.

The camera pans to a position high above, showing hundreds of computers and associated people.

"Demoscene groups. SIGGRAPH developers. Hackers and crackers. Meme generators. This is the place to be."

"The state of the world today is grim."

Cut to a scene of a Demoscene-animated diagram of government encroachments into the Free Web Territories.

"The DMCA-II is coming into effect, and now it extends far beyond the borders of the American nation and onto the aspects of the WIPO."

Another scene shows a massive skyscraper being built, the logo of the Church of Scientology being erected on some of the completed floors.

"Project Chanology has attracted the attention of some people who can find us."

Cut to the man speaking. "We've been sloppy. But you can help us."

The girl speaks, her face masked by hair and shadows. The hint of a smile appears on what little is visible of her face. "When do I start?"

Cut to black. Deep base sounds play like resonating heartbeats.

Cut to a monitor showing the diagram of Conficker.F's spread. An audio file plays on a computer: "This is the developer of the Conficker worm. We are communicating to everyone via the network infrastructure that we have erected."

Cut to a scene in the Cadre, where people are running about to various computers. "Conficker.F is not one of ours. It is unpredictable. We are directing you to the tools to destroy-roy-roy-roy too late. I have you now." Computers display BSODs everywhere.

"What do we do?"

"We fight."

Orchestral music rises. Cut to fingers typing on keyboards, LCD screens showing every known 4chan meme, cut to a random lovemaking scene, cut to glasses and freckles and high schools and universities, and DDoS attacks and port scanners.

Fade to black as the music reaches its apex.

The text appears in ASCII word art: "THE NERD WAR."

The trailer seems to be over, but a YouTube window appears. Boxxy's face is revealed. She begins with the famous "My name is Boxxy. Most of you know me as...wel..b-b-b-" She stops smiling.

"Most of you know me as B-B-B-ANONYMOUS."

"COMING UNIX_T: 1300000000" This text fades into "3/13/2011, 07:46:40)
Third Spanish States
16-04-2009, 06:31
Channel 4
www.4chantv.tee

Anonymous Header
Subject: I herd u liek...

4chanTV would like to acquire broadcasting rights(1) for "The Nerd War" because people are everywhere wanting to watch it for the LULZ across the Confederacy. Dozens of millions are expected to watch the movie in the Internets. Meanwhile we struggle to destroy the cancer.

(1) Which of course means, the first link of a torrent with it. Remixed with epicness of /hg/ uber-rage Of course.
The Great Lord Tiger
16-04-2009, 07:19
The official response of the Immortal Lands of the Great Lord Tiger:

http://mek1980.files.wordpress.com/2009/01/o_rly1.jpg

Good day.
Perimeter Defense
16-04-2009, 13:02
This is gonna be the Big Nerd Movie of 2011 :P
Forum_Fluffywuffy
16-04-2009, 13:05
The Third Empire is outraged to see a nerd move without Slashdot. As avid Slashdotters, we feel that the ommission is too great to allow the movie into our nation. Already, at just rumors of this omission, thousands are leaving their basements in protest. Think of the rise in skin cancer rates! We demand you fix the movie.

--Imperial Film Agency
Perimeter Defense
16-04-2009, 14:20
SLASHDOT? Ha, that's just the beginning! We will throw more than just XKCD and death at you!

-Executive Producer Mendelsson
Perimeter Defense
16-04-2009, 14:21
And now: The poster.

http://s195.photobucket.com/albums/z157/Flatterland/THENERDWAR.jpg