NationStates Jolt Archive

The TRUE and ONLY Religion

25-03-2009, 23:26
Friends, Corlads, Fantallians.

This is a broadcast on all severs, to all nations. Recent reports have revealed that there are several major religions out there. The part that disgusted me and my people the most was the fact that Corakism,the Religion of my People, was not one of them. The fact that defiers of Corak, could class themselves as a major religion frankly disturbs me and my Goverment.

The God and Phrophet, Corak, died for us all...He sacrificed himself so Darkness and Evil could not dictator us all. And by all, I mean every other Nation and State out there and not just The Holy Republic of Fantallia. Anyway, we want to know who is a defier of Corak. I and my people are a compassionate race and base are judgement and actions on the actions of others. Not the appearence, race or religion of others.

So, Children of Corak everywhere. Speak up now! Speak up to Corak himself! Declare your true Religion and let the God Corak, gaze into your soul!

- President Tom Xeanade of The Holy Republic of Fantallia
The Fanboyists
25-03-2009, 23:36
Generalissimo Steven P. Grimmeberger snorted when he read the dispatch.
"What the hell? It's not April 1st, you know," he remarked to the aide that had brought the dispatch, chuckling.
"I think they're serious, sir."
"..." Grimmeberger was at a loss for words. It was one thing to demand conversion of everyone to a major religion, it was another entirely to insist on conversion to a minor faith no one had ever heard of.
"From what he wrote, it sounds sort of Islamic. I'm quite happy with my Catholiscism, thank you very much. Ensure that these guys don't try preaching here. The last thing we need is another group bellowing their path to salvation, and that everyone else is wrong."
"And prepare a reply."
"Absolutely sir."

From the Desk of Generalissimo Steven Phillip Grimmeberger;
To President Tom Xeanade of the Holy Republic of Fantallia

I am afraid that your call for the preaching of your faith in the Federation has fallen on deaf ears, and will continue to fall on deaf ears. While we do not take issue with the practice of what you call "the One True Faith" within your own borders (therefore, not our problem), we will be quite annoyed if you attempt to send Corakian missionaries to the Federation. If any such missionaries are sent, they will be impounded and extradited back to Fantallia.

Generalissimo Steven Phillip Grimmeberger
Head of State, Fanboyist Federation of North Atlantic Territories
Commander-in-Chief, Federal Armed Forces
25-03-2009, 23:44
To: Government of Fantallia
From: Fatatatutti Department of Culture and Tourism

We are a small nation of only six billion and we have at least a dozen churches for the followers of various faiths. We are not aware of any Corakpots in Fatatatutti but we assure you that everybody is free to practise his or her own religion or lack of religion here.
The Beatus
25-03-2009, 23:52
Halls of Right

"Blasphemy, utter Blasphemy," said one of the Bishops. "They believe theirs to be the 'one true religion,' what is, apparently, not clear, is that the rest of the world disagrees. What will our response to this be?"

"The standard one," replied Prior Mobely. "We will deny the existence of this 'Corak'. It even feels funny to say. It sounds like some kind of cheap alcohol that comes in a box. So any way, deny the existence of this 'Corak', reaffirm the word of the Book, and the Path. Give a short message, about how Bob must look down on these poor soles with pity as they have not found solitude, and comfort in his light, etc, etc."

Press Release

Our best scholars have reviewed the historical texts, and factual evidence, and find no proof of the existence of a Corak. Nor have we found any evidence, that suggests anything other than the Origin of Life, as professed in the Book of the Blessed, the word of the Path of the Blessed, and the Great Bob himself. We take great pity, as we believe the Great Bob does, on these poor soles who have been unable to find the Path for themselves, and instead wonder lost.
25-03-2009, 23:53
He must have not done a good job because their are plenty of us around. Now down to business any practicer of corakism will be annihilated in the state of ralkovia. The religion of corakism will be blacklisted and should a prophet, preachers, etc. will also be annihilated.
25-03-2009, 23:57
To:Fatatatutti Department of Culture and Tourism
From: Goverment of the Holy Republic of Fantallia

We are aware of your 'Churches' and all Churchs. This is not a decloration of War on all races but merely a decloration of our Religion's signifcance. As for your small nation, I would watch your tounge. Blasphemy is something we take very very seriously in our Republic. If you wish to mock us with the term 'Corakpots' then I would take it as almost a declaration of war. But know this, insult our faith again and we will take further action.
The Fanboyists
26-03-2009, 00:00
OOC: I just want to make sure you realized, Fantallia, that Fatatatutti was being sarcastic. He was saying only six billion. You would not want to declare war on that, if you're a small nation (which, at this stage, you are). For goodness' sake, that would overload my military, and I could crush you like an ant, no offense.
26-03-2009, 00:01
((OOC: Ofcourse, Ofcourse lol Sorry misunderstood lol =P))
26-03-2009, 00:02
To: Goverment of of Fantallia
From: Fatatatutti Department of Culture and Tourism

We do not wish to insult your religion, whatever you call yourselves. As we said, we have several hundred religious people in our nation and all of them are free to worship as they please.
The Fanboyists
26-03-2009, 00:04
((OOC: Ofcourse, Ofcourse lol Sorry misunderstood lol =P))

OOC: no problem. Just making sure you don't do anything you might regret. I made that same type of mistake in my first RP and nearly got annihilated for it. :P
26-03-2009, 00:15
0630 Hours, Volzgradien Royal Palace, St. Adriansburg

Grand Duke Alexander Kavinkov II almost spat out his coffee as he gazed at the newest scrap of paper delivered to his desk by one of his legion of aides. He gulped down the last of the fresh brew and began to roar with laughter. He had originally thought the message was a joke, probably Baron Pavelov trying to poke fun at some lunatic fringe group. Kavinkov hadn't had such a good laugh, especially in the early morning, for as long as he could remember. He slowly began to re-gain his composure as the laughing fit subsided. He hastily pressed the button on his desk's intercom.

"Father Kasparov, come quickly! I have something to show you!" Kavinkov said, again barely suppressing more laughter. A few minutes passed, before a knock on the large, red oak doors signaled Kasparov's entrance.

"Please come in Father." Kavinkov called out. Wordlessly, Kasparov opened the massive doors and slowly entered the room.

"You called for me sire?" The wizened man inquired as he bowed before the Grand Duke.

"Indeed, please come closer." Kasparov shuffled quickly over to Kavinkov's paper covered desk. No sooner had he reached the Grand Duke's side did Kavinkov shove a crumpled paper into Kasparov's gloved hands. Kasparov glanced quickly over the report. He smiled for a moment, before he too burst out into giggles.

"I'll have fun denouncing these fools sire!" Kasparov replied as he left Kavinkov's office, both men still laughing.
Official Communique from the Most Holy Volzgradien Catholic Church and Government

From: Archbishop Viktor Kasparov

As representative of the Most Holy Catholic Church in Volzgrad, I would like to personally denounce the so called "religion" of Corakism as heretical and unholy. Despite the claims of the Fantallian government, Corakism is little more then heathenish devil worship! Corakism is from now an illegal and completely banned religion in the Grand Duchy of Volzgrad. Any found guilty of believing in this gibberish will be immediately deported or executed.
Gun Manufacturers
26-03-2009, 00:40
TO: President Tom Xeanade, The Holy Republic of Fantallia
FROM: The ASoGM Ministry of Faith
RE: Corakism

There is currently no Church of Corakism in the ASoGM. The ASoGM would allow the practice of Corakism inside the ASoGM's borders, under the assumption that followers of Corakism do not cause trouble with followers of other religions.
North Defese
26-03-2009, 00:50
North Defesian Announcment

While North Defese prides itself in seperation of church and state, we have found that, after a lengthy investigation, multiple Corakism Churches have not been paying the Public Assembly fee, and will be fined 1,000,000 ISD for failure to pay the Assembly fee, tax evasion, and extortion.
If these fee's are not paid within the set time, then all members of the Church of Corakism in North Defese will be arrested and prosocuted to the fullestextent of the law, and the churches demolished and converted into parks.

His Royal Majesty Robert J.
26-03-2009, 01:08
While in no census-takers in the Grand Duchy of Farenz have listed their religion as Corakism as of yet, we will happily recognize it if a petition is sent to the federal government bearing the signatures of one thousand or more of our citizens. Until then, believers in your religion are free to speak their minds and practice their faith as long as they do not present a threat to others.

Flint Skolov
Farenzian Councilor of Culture and Religion
26-03-2009, 06:39
The Socialist Assembly was pretty annoyed by this propaganda piece, the people of Vetia were mostly Orthodox Christian with a notable Mueslim Minority but Athetism was taking root. The Socialist Assembly respected the right of people to worship whatever religion they wanted as long as what they do does not affect the state.

A statement was sent to the nation responsible.

To:President Tom Xeanade of The Holy Republic of Fantallia
From:Kirith Ballu, Head of the Department of Foreign Affairs


Vetia wishes to state that as good as you might think your religion is it's more then the same, in fact your statement sounds so similar to Jesus that it's probably just copy&paste.

We have nobody of your religion in Vetia. Most Vetians due to the Conquest of the Roman Empire and influence of the later Byzantines are Orthodox Christians. With a Muslim minority caused by the Ottoman Occupation of the early 20th century.

This calls for a balance, no religion can be shown to be favored and you just sent a message through public channels trying to promote a religion nobody here as heard about. Do you know the trouble this can cause?

Be smart and put some consideration into your message before you preach.

Yours Sincerely,

Kirith Ballu
26-03-2009, 07:40
Mokastana News network quickly picked up the message and played it during the famed "Comedy hour" during prime time, right between "My silly Capitalist" and "Why I don't date Greal-ites." The religion known as Corakism was taken as one of the best commercial skits done since "Does it Ban?" With many Mokans soon requesting a sequel.
26-03-2009, 08:17
~Quick Message from the Principality of Belkaland~

We have done a national poll and have discovered that only 1 person practices this religon, a crazy inmate at Velum Triple MAX Federal Prison on death's row convicted of the murder of 248 people over a 3 month period in the name of his God. As such, your religion is now illegal & punishable by death
26-03-2009, 08:28
~Quick Message from the Principality of Belkaland~

We have done a national poll and have discovered that only 1 person practices this religon, a crazy inmate at Velum Triple MAX Federal Prison on death's row convicted of the murder of 248 people over a 3 month period in the name of his God. As such, your religion is now illegal & punishable by death

(OOC: That actually says a lot more about your country and police than his religion.)
The Emmerian Unions
26-03-2009, 08:28
<<OOC: Belkaland, lol.>>
26-03-2009, 08:32
(OOC: That actually says a lot more about your country and police than his religion.)

OOC: What? The guy used homemade bombs & collapsing buildings to kill them all.

Now if you're also commenting on the fact we do have the death sentence, it's you who's crazy. I for one, support capital punishment.
26-03-2009, 08:33
OOC: What? The guy used homemade bombs & collapsing buildings to kill them all.

(OOC: Mhm, suuuure. That's what that reports say....)
The Emmerian Unions
26-03-2009, 08:35
<<OOC: I hereby declare that this thread has ended and the winner is Belkaland.>>