NationStates Jolt Archive

"The nation of Gesford is pleased to announce the hypothetical discovery of a very large oil field in our national territory! No guarantees!"

OOC: Wow, one-liner ftw! Elaborate and add detail, and maybe you'll get posts. Having seen your ability to poke fun at other nations who post similarly as you do, I would ahve expected more than just a single line.

OOC: I loled at first post. Pretty funny.

OOC: Wow, one-liner ftw! Elaborate and add detail, and maybe you'll get posts. Having seen your ability to poke fun at other nations who post similarly as you do, I would ahve expected more than just a single line.

OOC: I must confess that you are right. My heart wasn't really in it anyway. :(

OOC: And it's spelled "have".

OOC: Alright! You've got me, you cad! I never thought you would be capable, but you've forced me to spill the beans.

I had some half-formed thoughts about luring some CA bumblers into the thread and then just dicking around with them for a bit.

Unfortunately, they didn't take the bait. Obviously they saw through my veneer of faux-meekness to the true rapier wit that I would have subjected those blackguards to in a heartbeat.

Oh self, curse you for your violent and fiery nature. Curse you for intimidating your foes all too easily.

Mark my words, I shall return! And ye all will not see me coming 'till I have skewered thee on my razor tongue. Beware!

OOC: And yes, I know. They are simple misspellings that result from quick typing. Going too slow, and you always get writer's block and painful hand cramps. Going to ofast, and you can never spell correctly. I do come close, however.

OOC: And yes, I know. They are simple misspellings that result from quick typing. Going too slow, and you always get writer's block and painful hand cramps. Going to ofast, and you can never spell correctly. I do come close, however.

ooc: of course, then we invented spellchecker. :)

OOC: And yes, I know. They are simple misspellings that result from quick typing. Going too slow, and you always get writer's block and painful hand cramps. Going to ofast, and you can never spell correctly. I do come close, however.

OOC: Point taken. I apologize, I do have a propensity to needle.

OOC: Alright! You've got me, you cad! I never thought you would be capable, but you've forced me to spill the beans.

I had some half-formed thoughts about luring some CA bumblers into the thread and then just dicking around with them for a bit.

Unfortunately, they didn't take the bait. Obviously they saw through my veneer of faux-meekness to the true rapier wit that I would have subjected those blackguards to in a heartbeat.

Oh self, curse you for your violent and fiery nature. Curse you for intimidating your foes all too easily.

Mark my words, I shall return! And ye all will not see me coming 'till I have skewered thee on my razor tongue. Beware!
I'm tagging this anyways...
Anyways, the best way to bait them is to join their ranks...
Then stab a knife up their nice big artery where the sun don't shine.

Bonus points if you succeed and/or don't get raped for it.

"C'mon, you Corporate Alliance sissyfaced turdburglers! Have at thee! I dare ya to take this thread seriously even though I make no promise to do the same!"

"Blur hur hur, the Blackhelm Confederacy demands that you hand over your oil fields before we send our gazillion ships and mercenaries who flee from every battle to attack you! Send us a lot of money with those oil fields too! Roar/yell/intimidate!"

"Oh yeah, you know what I've got?"


"DO YA?"


http://i31.tinypic.com/23hk4l1.jpg

"An artillery silencer!"

"You won't know where to attack the one artillery piece that's shooting you."

"And it uses REALLY big shells. "

*Sinister Cackle* background muzak (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dcflCzZlLcQ)

We, the great and mighty S.P.L.U.R.G. demand that you cease and desist your pitiful impressions of the *pause, while pages in a notebook are flipped* Blackwell Comradery. If you fail to do so, we will make further vaguely threatening demands.

"Citizens of Gesford, we gather you here today to implement drastic measures in the face of such a mediocre invasion by the" *tries to remember* "uh, Company Federation, or uh, something like that."

"You must all be prepared to give the very mediumest of your efforts! Particularly, we need you all to urinate and defecate on as many oil fields as you can, so that the, uh" *tries again to remember* "Whitesheild Agency? Blackwater Worldwide? Ah, fuck it. Just make it really smelly for them. Piss in the water so their ships won't want to swim in it!"

OOC: tag for lulz

"Enemies of the Birchbaum Confundancy! Allies of peace! Lovers of mocha cheescake! Unite at once so we can get to keep our slippery sticky stuff that shoots upwards in an orgasmic display of national potency. The black stuff. YOU KNOW I MEANT OIL."

"Citizens of Gesford, we gather you here today to implement drastic measures in the face of such a mediocre invasion by the" *tries to remember* "uh, Company Federation, or uh, something like that."

"You must all be prepared to give the very mediumest of your efforts! Particularly, we need you all to urinate and defecate on as many oil fields as you can, so that the, uh" *tries again to remember* "Whitesheild Agency? Blackwater Worldwide? Ah, fuck it. Just make it really smelly for them. Piss in the water so their ships won't want to swim in it!"

Maniacal Cackle, harder background muzak (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0P6r6-gZYkI&feature=related)

If you have not detected from the music, we are quite irked, by your continued mockery of the Corporeal Atheists, and the Background Competency. S.P.L.U.R.G will not take these matters lightly, if you continue, you will be served with a cease and desist order! Have a nice day.

Over the Radio

The republic of Jubilzanbiziproperisteriousambugilligioussupercalifragalisticespealidociousmaximuscakeistastesagoodu s. will ally with Gesford in its attempt to attack the alliance that is known as the......

*intermediate pause......*

Uhh.....Samseld Illiteracy? Backhawk Confunderacy? Whiteford Unity? Redtamper Federation?....

ah well, I seem to have lost the book containing the alliance names......

Over the Radio

The republic of Jubilzanbiziproperisteriousambugilligioussupercalifragalisticespealidociousmaximuscakeistastesagoodu s. will ally with Gesford in its attempt to attack the alliance that is known as the......

*intermediate pause......*

Uhh.....Samseld Illiteracy? Backhawk Confunderacy? Whiteford Unity? Redtamper Federation?....

ah well, I seem to have lost the book containing the alliance names......

*Angry Grunt* Even Harder Background Muzak (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wI8W9n80YaY)

This is it. You have forced our hands, S.P.L.U.R.G. has called in their lawyers!

*Enter three men, pictured below*
http://celadoncreations.typepad.com/celadon_creations/images/2007/06/01/larry_darryl_darryl.jpg

"Hi, I'm Larry, this is my brother Darryl, and this is my other brother Darryl."

"The Current Volunteer COMPTROLLER of Gesford, Wedward Elter:"

http://www.blogiversity.org/blogs/panda_ponderings/weird-people-fat-guy-eating-huge-ha.jpg

"Mr. Elter jiggles violently up and down as he trembles with excitement over the proposal from Jubilzanbiziproperisteriousambugilligioussupercalifragalisticespealidociousmaximuscakeistastesagoodu s. "

"Friends, we will send the blimp fleet to intimidate and terrorize the evil Blastoise Consortium and their disgusting Carrot Astronauts!"

http://2.bp.blogspot.com/_wBbhueMVdC0/R2MG7R7TC4I/AAAAAAAAAWY/MocdvllEUOw/s400/Ron+Paul+Blimp.jpg


MOST TERRIFYING MUSIC EVER PLAYS (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iYxwuN_6X_E)as these three men challenge the lawyers:

http://www.tvcrazy.net/tvclassics/articles/stooges/images/three-stooges.jpg

"The Current Volunteer COMPTROLLER of Gesford, Wedward Elter:"

http://www.blogiversity.org/blogs/panda_ponderings/weird-people-fat-guy-eating-huge-ha.jpg

"Mr. Elter jiggles violently up and down as he trembles with excitement over the proposal from Jubilzanbiziproperisteriousambugilligioussupercalifragalisticespealidociousmaximuscakeistastesagoodu s. "

"Friends, we will send the blimp fleet to intimidate and terrorize the evil Blastoise Consortium and their disgusting Carrot Astronauts!"

http://2.bp.blogspot.com/_wBbhueMVdC0/R2MG7R7TC4I/AAAAAAAAAWY/MocdvllEUOw/s400/Ron+Paul+Blimp.jpg


MOST TERRIFYING MUSIC EVER PLAYS (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iYxwuN_6X_E)as these three men challenge the lawyers:

http://www.tvcrazy.net/tvclassics/articles/stooges/images/three-stooges.jpg

S.P.L.U.R.G challenges the belittlers of the Backhoe Confidants, to a battle of the voices!

hardest background music (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iSloW2coCDQ&feature=related)

*Larry, Daryl, and Daryle sing along with the background music*

We don't need lawyers to win our argument against you and your Busthole Conshuberacy. We have rock artists!

Hiya....uh...were here to "Rock you out of here"....huh...thats weird. (http://neatorama.cachefly.net/images/2008-04/the-beatles.jpg)

OOC: Ah, would that I were able, were it not for the fact that I must rise early tomorrow. Therefore, I have a compromise, fitting for all until such time as we reconvene (tomorrow afternoon/evening). The compromise is thus. I will declare victory over the unwashed Blackhelm Confederacy and their lackeys, the Corporate Alliance, until such time as they see fit to continue this most exhilarating charade (tomorrow afternoon).

I warn you, Blackface Colostomy, that we Gesfans are willing to declare victory as many times as it takes to provoke, engage, and subdue you, in whichever order tickles your fancy. I challenge Ye, O Corpulent Assgrabbers! Stand toe to toe with me in ridiculousness, lest ye all be deemed cowards! The Coward Alliance, indeed!

"Gesford thus declares victory! Don't keep us waiting, or we may have to do it again!"

OOC: Ah, would that I were able, were it not for the fact that I must rise early tomorrow. Therefore, I have a compromise, fitting for all until such time as we reconvene (tomorrow afternoon/evening). The compromise is thus. I will declare victory over the unwashed Blackhelm Confederacy and their lackeys, the Corporate Alliance, until such time as they see fit to continue this most exhilarating charade (tomorrow afternoon).

I warn you, Blackface Colostomy, that we Gesfans are willing to declare victory as many times as it takes to provoke, engage, and subdue you, in whichever order tickles your fancy. I challenge Ye, O Corpulent Assgrabbers! Stand toe to toe with me in ridiculousness, lest ye all be deemed cowards! The Coward Alliance, indeed!

"Gesford thus declares victory! Don't keep us waiting, or we may have to do it again!"

Background Muzak (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dgeMk97-TbY)

S.P.L.U.R.G. must coincide, that your declaration of victory over the, Blackfeather Cherokees, is unquestionable. However, we wish to remind you of the great sorrow, the Cherokee people have already gone through, and ask you not to put them through too much more.

"Gesford declares victory for the second time! I'm warning you, don't make us do it again, Gripingcrust Constipation!"

"DAMN YOU, BRUTEHULL CONSTITUENCY. You go too far!"

OOC: ROFL. Tagged by Greal.

"Gesford declares victory for the second time! I'm warning you, don't make us do it again, Gripingcrust Constipation!"
I shall recognize your claim for victory, come, let us throw a victory-parade in their faces!

XD

BC and Undershi may understand the refferance.
But here's a link for ya newbies (http://forums.jolt.co.uk/showthread.php?t=505396), start reading from post 37 to end.
Try not to laugh, smile, or smirk. (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=piWCBOsJr-w)

I shall recognize your claim for victory, come, let us throw a victory-parade in their faces!

XD

BC and Undershi may understand the refferance.
But here's a link for ya newbies (http://forums.jolt.co.uk/showthread.php?t=505396), start reading from post 37 to end.
Try not to laugh, smile, or smirk. (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=piWCBOsJr-w)

OOC: you folks were all such noobs back then...

That looked like fun times though, we don't get many good large scale conflicts these days. I have yet to really see one in my time on NS. The closest I've ever seen (or been in) was the LION-Heg wars. Here's hoping the war I'm currently orchestrating the beginnings of will be satisfactory.

PS: 3,333 posts.

Yus, but we had fun being noobs (http://forums.jolt.co.uk/showthread.php?t=477731)