NationStates Jolt Archive

We declare another war with Stoklomovi because they're communist.

ooc: you need a LOT more info. Horrible opening post.

OOC: I have to admit, the first post made me laugh inadvertently.

OOC: Declaring war on a nation based on political idelogies is stupid.

ooc: if it's alright with Stok, I'll fight this guy. This way he doesn't get boot stomped after a single attack..

OOC: I wonder what'll happen now. Oh, and if Stok actually does anything, I'd like to join in. Qing is kinda annoying. =|

OOC: Due to the nation of your size and due to the economic statistics of your nation, your nation cannot afford to go on a war especially when your nation do not possess any millitary capabilities, arms and the technology needed to invade a nation or to defend your nation from invaders.

IC: Foreign Minister of FSSU urgers the The Empire of The Great Qing to withdraw it's declaration of war with the nation of Stoklomovi before it's too late. There are serious repercussions and consequences if your nation decides to go through with it's declaration of war. Please withdraw immediately.

OOC: obvious troll is obvious.

OOC: If this person is a troll then by all means everyone to go on a war rampage with this nation and bomb it to ashes and then divide the nation up into East, West, North and South Great Qing.

OOC: If this person is a troll then by all means everyone to go on a war rampage with this nation and bomb it to ashes and then divide the nation up.

OOC: as a general rule, feeding a troll is not the ideal way to be rid of it.

OOC: If this person is a troll then by all means everyone to go on a war rampage with this nation and bomb it to ashes and then divide the nation up into East, West, North and South Great Qing.

OOC: This thread just keeps getting better and better. I haven't had this much fun since Ryou Black Islands declared a "SECERT MARRAGE"

OOC: If this nation wants to go on a war rampage declaring war on random nations based on it's political ideologies, i would like to ask permission to stage a war and to test out my millitary capabilities on this troll of a nation without any international condomnation?

OOC: obvious troll is obvious.

oooc like last time

OOC: If this nation wants to go on a war rampage declaring war on random nations based on it's political ideologies, i would like to ask permission to stage a war and to test out my millitary capabilities on this troll of a nation without any international condomnation?

ooc: ooh, I wanna do that. I was here first :) I haven't been in an all out war for awhile. (not that it would come to that:wink:)

international condomnation?

OOC: Somehow, words escape me.

OOC: Stop feeding the troll?

ooc
You'd think she/he/it'd learn...

IC
To: Qing
We are the Technonauts, Your technological and biological distinctiveness shall be added to our own(again).
Resistance is futile(again), power down and prepare to be assimilated(again).
That is all(again). (http://forums.jolt.co.uk/showpost.php?p=14531209&postcount=51)

ooc
You also o so conveniently didn't add the tech era or really anything...

OOC: No fair! I still have yet to see a beginner nation attack me!
But in all seriousness, Qing, please learn to RP, or stop posting. Plain, simply, and easy.

ooc: ooh, I wanna do that. I was here first :) I haven't been in an all out war for awhile. (not that it would come to that:wink:)

OOC: How about we both invade it ;)

We declare another war with Stoklomovi because they're communist.

Is this a joke? You can't declare war on another nation only based in its political ideologies. This is absolutely stupid. It's like say, I declare war on you because I hate you, it's silly...

FOR ALL: There are other more credible reasons to declare war, as threats, armament and intimidation, but "We declares another war with Stoklomovi because they're communist." It's pathetic. I don't see any valid argument in this affirmation for declaring a war.

I believe that open this topic was a loss of time...

The Confederacy IGNORE Cannon was nearly tearing apart, being used as often in fail spots as the anti-tank guns of insurgents in hot spots across the World.

OOC: lol

http://i227.photobucket.com/albums/dd188/NS_Crossbowman/diploheader5.png
Stoklomolvi Commissariat of State
7656 Hegemony Drive, Administrative Compound, Office Complex 7C, Hallway 52L, Room 89
Vladistov, Stoklomolvi

Encryption Level 0, Null Encryption
To: [OPEN COMMUNIQUÉ]
Subject: General Statement

We really have nothing to say.

http://i227.photobucket.com/albums/dd188/NS_Crossbowman/sigblock3.png

_____________

Stalingrad, Stalingrad Oblast, Stoklomolvi

A single boat with five men on it left port and headed for the land of the Qing.

The Commonwealth of Zoingo uses the invincible IGNORE cannons and fires its powerful, godly rays at the nation of Greater Qing. The nation imploded onto itself before being sucked into a black hole and out of existence of the NS world forever. Although a black hole formed, it was quickly sealed up by a convenient drainage plug. Afterwords, a message was sent out.



Official Rapid Communique

To all nations,

Please excuse the slight static that you may have received that emitted from 'Qing'', obviously, someone spilled coffee on your intelligence machinery again. In other news, we are holding a party to celebrate the "Lost Nation of Qing" exhibit that just opened up 5 seconds ago, please attend this momentous celebration.

OOC: Well executed, Stok.

OOC: Funny to see all the message ornaments being bigger than the message.

The million men from the war with the Grand World Order demobilized and returned to work. Meanwhile, the hundred thousand man army of the Forbidden Banners marched again, and took up their positions in the now rebuilt houses of Tientsin and Chinhuangtao. This time, there were actual bunkers and sandbags to defend from any possible invasion.

OOC: Not a hundred trillion men?

OOC: How about we both invade it ;)

ooc: YAY!!!

The million men from the war with the Grand World Order demobilized and returned to work. Meanwhile, the hundred thousand man army of the Forbidden Banners marched again, and took up their positions in the now rebuilt houses of Tientsin and Chinhuangtao. This time, there were actual bunkers and sandbags to defend from any possible invasion.


ooc: lol, I think he's scared of u stok

The million men from the war with the Grand World Order demobilized and returned to work. Meanwhile, the hundred thousand man army of the Forbidden Banners marched again, and took up their positions in the now rebuilt houses of Tientsin and Chinhuangtao. This time, there were actual bunkers and sandbags to defend from any possible invasion.

OOC: Godminding. :D

I am sure that the Grand World Order would not spend billions for no reason in building up bunkers and sandbags to defend a nation who intentionally goes on a war rampage for no reason.

No nation is crazy to aid those kind of nation. All it's needed to neutralise your nation is to have a few falcons, black hawks and migs fly over your nation, drop a few bombs and finish.

OOC: Lol, hundred trillion men? I don't think the largest country in NS even has that many people.

I'm pretty sure no NS country has even one hundred billion pop.

OOC: We should all invade this troll of a nation and practice our millitary capabilities on the nation.

OOC: That was jest, Tech. Kind of hard to do it right with text, though.

OOC: Meh.

ooc: I love how this thread has become a chatroom of one-liners rather then a thread.

OOC: It started as a one liner, a srs bsns one.

We declare another war with Stoklomovi because they're communist.

TO: The Great Qing
FROM: Ministry of Foreign Affairs, ASoGM
RE: War

We in the ASoGM wish to have no contact with the unstable nation of The Great Qing. We were about to offer to negotiate with The Great Qing for a trade agreement, but due to the aggressive nature of your nation, we feel that would only put ASoGM assets in jeopardy. Henceforth, a full travel and trade ban is now in effect between our nations. Any TGQ ships will be turned away from GMian waters or risk being destroyed, and all TGQ citizens will be refused entry into our nation, unless they are seeking asylum from your nation.

TO: The Great Qing
FROM: Ministry of Foreign Affairs, ASoGM
RE: War

We in the ASoGM wish to have no contact with the unstable nation of The Great Qing. We were about to offer to negotiate with The Great Qing for a trade agreement, but due to the aggressive nature of your nation, we feel that would only put ASoGM assets in jeopardy. Henceforth, a full travel and trade ban is now in effect between our nations. Any TGQ ships will be turned away from GMian waters or risk being destroyed, and all TGQ citizens will be refused entry into our nation, unless they are seeking asylum from your nation.

OOC: My nation almost dupped by the criminal organisations in your nation and your nation refuses to do anything about it, therefore it is rather safe not to establish any trade agreement with your nation untill your nation arrests these criminal organisations and black market organisations.

OOC: Chaos ensues!

Sea in front of Tientsin named whatever the Qing named it

The boat stopped in front of Tientsin.

"Surrender your weapons or else we will force you all to eat durians for the rest of your lives."

Some random colony off the coast of Ming

283 Tupolev Tu-95 bombers prepared for take-off.

OOC: My nation almost dupped by the criminal organisations in your nation and your nation refuses to do anything about it, therefore it is rather safe not to establish any trade agreement with your nation untill your nation arrests these criminal organisations and black market organisations.

OOC: First off, you REALLY need to learn the difference between OOC and IC posts. Second, I'm not asking to establish a trade agreement with you, so stop bringing the nuke sale incident up in every thread the both of us post in. Third, I already mentioned why my nation hasn't stopped Iron Fist.

IC:
http://view.playlist.com/13869486603/standalone

Subterranean Bunker, Eastern Mountain Range:

“Sir! Sir!” A young technician shouted from the midst of a poorly lit room filled with various monitors. He had stood up from where he had been observing the readouts from his own station.

General Inser Tnam Ehere, the bunker’s CO, turned from where he was looking at a highly stylized map of the world, and hurried to the technician who had called him. “What is it private” He asked, smoking the stereotypical cigar of a high-ranking no-nonsense officer.

“Look at these impossibility readings, sir.” The technician said, his face pale as he looked at the monitor.

“My God! I’ve never seen any readings like that in my life!” Gen. Ehere gasped, the cigar dropping from his mouth. “Any idea of the origin?”

“I believe it’s from The Great Qing, sir.”

General Ehere became ashen faced. “I should have known. This has the potential to be catastrophic, we must stop it before it tears apart the very fabric of the universe.”

“Do you mean that..” The young man asked began and trailed off again, his eyes widening.

“Yes private, we must activate our great weapon.”


Office of the Hegemon, Sumguaia:

Mary Basset stood at the window to her office, smelling the air. There was something wrong in the wind, something almost like a scent. She started as her phone rang, and she walked to her desk to pick it up. “Yes? Oh, hello General. Oh my. Yes, I thought I could smell something in the air. Of course, it must be stopped. You have authorization. That is all.”

She hung up the phone, and turned back to the window. Massive senselessness required truly drastic measures to correct.

National Cathedral:

The huge cathedral that made up the center of the city of Sumguaia began to tremble as the ground below it slowly began moving. After a few moments, it split apart, each half slowly moving away from the other to reveal a massive pit. Arising slowly from this pit was one of the gargantuan Mark VII I.G.N.O.R.E L.A.Z.O.R’s, purchased several years previously by the Sumguaian government in secret. Slowly, it turned to aim into the sky, targeting an orbiting Sumguaian satellite, which would magnify and redirect it's beam to utterly annihilate the source of impossibility, in this case the nation of The Great Qing. They began charging, diverting the power grid of the nation’s entire mid-western region.


In her office, the Hegemon stood watching the sunset, a feeling of disgust rising in her. She snatched at the phone as it rang. “Are they charged General? Excellent. This menace to the universe ends now.”

Mary Basset hung up the phone again, turning to look at a small red button on her desk. Her finger hovered over it for a moment, and she smiled, whispering a single phrase to herself before pressing the button:


“Shoop da woop.”



http://farm1.static.flickr.com/152/414066321_59138e141a.jpg?v=0

IC:
http://view.playlist.com/13869486603/standalone

Subterranean Bunker, Eastern Mountain Range:

“Sir! Sir!” A young technician shouted from the midst of a poorly lit room filled with various monitors. He had stood up from where he had been observing the readouts from his own station.

General Inser Tnam Ehere, the bunker’s CO, turned from where he was looking at a highly stylized map of the world, and hurried to the technician who had called him. “What is it private” He asked, smoking the stereotypical cigar of a high-ranking no-nonsense officer.

“Look at these impossibility readings, sir.” The technician said, his face pale as he looked at the monitor.

“My God! I’ve never seen any readings like that in my life!” Gen. Ehere gasped, the cigar dropping from his mouth. “Any idea of the origin?”

“I believe it’s from The Great Qing, sir.”

General Ehere became ashen faced. “I should have known. This has the potential to be catastrophic, we must stop it before it tears apart the very fabric of the universe.”

“Do you mean that..” The young man asked began and trailed off again, his eyes widening.

“Yes private, we must activate our great weapon.”


Office of the Hegemon, Sumguaia:

Mary Basset stood at the window to her office, smelling the air. There was something wrong in the wind, something almost like a scent. She started as her phone rang, and she walked to her desk to pick it up. “Yes? Oh, hello General. Oh my. Yes, I thought I could smell something in the air. Of course, it must be stopped. You have authorization. That is all.”

She hung up the phone, and turned back to the window. Massive senselessness required truly drastic measures to correct.

National Cathedral:

The huge cathedral that made up the center of the city of Sumguaia began to tremble as the ground below it slowly began moving. After a few moments, it split apart, each half slowly moving away from the other to reveal a massive pit. Arising slowly from this pit was one of the gargantuan Mark VII I.G.N.O.R.E L.A.Z.O.R’s, purchased several years previously by the Sumguaian government in secret. Slowly, it turned to aim into the sky, targeting an orbiting Sumguaian satellite, which would magnify and redirect it's beam to utterly annihilate the source of impossibility, in this case the nation of The Great Qing. They began charging, diverting the power grid of the nation’s entire mid-western region.


In her office, the Hegemon stood watching the sunset, a feeling of disgust rising in her. She snatched at the phone as it rang. “Are they charged General? Excellent. This menace to the universe ends now.”

Mary Basset hung up the phone again, turning to look at a small red button on her desk. Her finger hovered over it for a moment, and she smiled, whispering a single phrase to herself before pressing the button: “Shoop da woop.”

http://farm1.static.flickr.com/152/414066321_59138e141a.jpg?v=0

IC:

Official Rapid Telegram (for those times in which I refuse to write a fancy letter.)

We applaud our allies the Sumguians for taking the same course of action that we did when responding to this situation. Would you like to attend the "Lost State of Qing" Exhibit that recently opened up?

At Tientsin, the men at the city yelled at the men in the boat.

"Get out of here, commie fags!"

They started firing at the boat with their machine guns.

ooc: ooo, racism and gay hatred. not very nice. I think this is gonna be big :)

OOC:The racism escapes me, I did not detect it.

OOC: Sumguy, how on Earth did you put that much effort into this thread? That blows my mind.

OOC: Why doesn't a newbie declare war on poor old me? I feel left out...

ooc: tbh this thread is quite possibly the funniest i've read here on the NS forums.

Same sea in front of Tientsin that will be named the "Sea in front of Tientsin" by Stoklomolvi

The boat exploded, sending the three hundred durians it held within its hull into the city. The smell was horrendous. Meanwhile, the bombers took off, and started dropping cluster bombs filled with tonnes of durians over Tientsin.

OOC: East Congaree will intervene in this to get "spoils of war"

To: The Great Qing Department of Foreign Affairs

From: East Congaree Executive Office

Cede the Municipality of Tianjin to East Congaree or face war from the Confederate Empire.

-Reginald Deere

Atlantic side of Guatemala Canal, Estado Centro

Four Estado Centro Jianghu-I class frigates, escorting 2,000 Estado Centro infantrymen, along with 40 East Congaree infantrymen headed for the Bohai Gulf, where they hoped to land in the wrecked ruins of Tianjin and claim the city for themselves.

Mexicali Airbase, Baja California, East Congaree

8 B-1 bombers, each filled with 81 Mk 82 bombs, headed for Beijing , where they hoped to flatten the Dongcheng District, and kill the emperor of Great Qing.

Empire of the Great Qing

We do not own a city called "Tianjin".

---

The durians exploded everywhere, creating a stench that actually killed several hundred soldiers and thousands of civilians. Asphyxiation was widespread, and the physical dropping of durians on people's heads killed them and whatever they touched. The sheer number of durians in Tientsin ruined the city entirely, and wood rotted away due to the horrible smell. Entire buildings collapsed.

OOC: Qing, you can still get it, despite your Wade-Giles fetish that inhibits you from proceeding into the Hanyu Pinyin era.

Over the Pacific Ocean

The B-1 bombers continued to advance towards Beijing, where they would set Dongcheng district into a hellish blaze.

The bombers flew over to the village of Beijing, east of Peking, where the small market district of Dongcheng was bombed to bits by the bombing run. A hundred civilians were killed.

[OOC] The Great Quing,i suggest you to either read the stickies (http://forums.jolt.co.uk/showthread.php?t=543994) very carefully or join us as a trainee on NS trainers which can be found here (http://forums.jolt.co.uk/showthread.php?t=584292).This will keep you out of trouble and greatly improve your Roleplaying skills.And please do not use realy idiotic reasons to declare war on people,you remind me of Riatto and his smilies.:(

OOC: Dongcheng district is an urban city center in Beijing, or by your in bed with Cixi Dowager methods, Peking.

OOC : I am very new to rping, BUT I ROOT FOR THE UNDERDOG, MOTHAFUCKAS! (I want to help qing, but I cannot until tommorow, do to thbe time, this is my reservation thing)

OOC: Banuta, he's a troll, nothing more. He's not an underdog, he's not fighting for the Rebellion or the Americans or whatever...he's just looking for attention.

Congaree, just demand from him a list of his major cities and urban centers - that'd save you time and if he refuses to answer you, you can ignore every attack he hits you with. That's fair.

Oh for the love of god! Just let these threads DIE already.

Seriously, such huge responses will only keep him doing this, if people keep reacting he will keep posting, seriously, JUST LET IT DIE. And until he/she/it learns to RP then ignore them.

I mean, seriously, what happened to skill? I'm sorry it's just useless threads like this get all the responses and other, potentially good ones may get ignored as a consequence.

OOC: Who said there's a Dongcheng District in my Peking?

How do you know my Emperor doesn't live in a hut? He lives in a palace outside Peking under a rock, by the way.

OOC: To claim Dongcheng district doesn't exist is to claim Beijing doesn't exist, pretty much. Also, by saying a city named Beijing exists, you are contradicting your love for Wade-Giles, and you claim that there are two cities named "Northern Capital".

Location: Jango Battery Space Station
Operation: IGNORE Blast
Possiblity of SURVIVAL: 0%
Possibility of being IGNORED: 100%
Possibility of being GLASSED: 100%
The chance of seeing a nation being IGNORED and GLASSED at the same time: Priceless!!

There are some things money can't buy. For everything else, there's Mastercard. The most accepted card in the world.

(Back to being serious... or am I?)

"We must execute Operation: IGNORE!" stated the commander as he pulled off a funky dance move in the main room while the other operators joined in. "For the funkiness of dance grove to the world, we must do this," the commander added as everyone cheered him on. "Luanch all pods and prepare for the funkiness of being IGNORED!"

The operators danced the operation away as the space station was lit up with funky lights and a disco ball! The station came over the nation of The Great Qing as the cannon came into range. The operator's were still dancing the moment away as three booms vibrated through the entire station.

"I thought there was two," one of the operators started.

"Just chill brother," replied the commander as he pulled off a dance move. "The third one will make things more bear able,"

Meanwhile, the three boxes blasted through the atmosphere before ejecting their parachutes before free falling to the ground. They came to a large bang before the first box opened slowly and there, before the eyes of the world was... 1980's Pop Singer Michael Jackson (before the surgery). He started to sing Smooth Criminal as the box became his very own mobile band.

(Song: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ex30DYwQlHU)

The second one was quick to open as the operators gasped in horror. Fears went through them as the door was blasted away. There, standing the world was 1970's Elvis Presley! The operators chanted away as Elvis started to do what he did best.

The third one gasped the operators as they wondered who else was dispatched. The door failed to open but the top was quickly removed as the side's were kicked off before the door was thrown aside. It was none other than...Chuck Norris. This made Jango Space Station flee in terror of Chuck Norris as he started to find his latest victim.

All in all, The Great Qing was offically IGNORED by the Vamperial Kingdom but was plagued by Elvis Presley, 1980's Michael Jackson and the legendary Chuck Norris.


OOC: One of my ambitions have being completed as I've always wanted to do something like this as an IGNORE post.

OOC: To claim Dongcheng district doesn't exist is to claim Beijing doesn't exist, pretty much. Also, by saying a city named Beijing exists, you are contradicting your love for Wade-Giles, and you claim that there are two cities named "Northern Capital".

OOC: A bit like how there's no city called Boston in the USA because the UK already had one, and the lay out of Melbourne, Australia is, after all, the same as that of Melbourne, Derbyshire for the same reason, and there's certainly no Tripoli in Libya, 'cause that would mean Libya would also have a larger city called Beirut!
This is not how you play with trolls!

OOC: To say there is another city named Beijing right outside of Beijing is retarded. That would imply that there are two norhern capitals right next to each other. Also, I expect for him to properly recognize my air raid on Beijing.

Nearing Tianjin Harbor

The Jianghu-I class frigates prepared to open up their thirty minute bombardment of Tianjin Harbor. After being bombarded, the forces would land slightly West of the harbor and occupy the city.

OOC: To say there is another city named Beijing right outside of Beijing is retarded. That would imply that there are two norhern capitals right next to each other. Also, I expect for him to properly recognize my air raid on Beijing.


OOC: This post is more fitting of facepalmery than anything the OP has delivered. I almost think that this sort of response is his principle motivation. What in anything he's ever previously posted leads you to expect him to properly recognise anything? What about him doing something retarded would be in any way out of character for his nation? What is even unusual about a country having two places with the same name?
[/trying to help]

OOC: Declaring war on a nation based on political idelogies is stupid.

OOC: No, it's not.:p

OOC: How did this get to a second page? Better yet, how did this get over fifty posts?

OOC: No, it's not.:p


OOC: Oyaw.

((OOC: First he declares war on me because I'm Fascist, now he's going after Stok for being Communist. A bit odd, IMO, as he doesn't seem like the moderate type.))

OOC: Hey, villagers can name their villages whatever they please. Also, if you had contacted me about where my palace is, I would have told you.

The bombs struck around the city, dissipating the foul stench from the durians and igniting many buildings on fire. Civilians fled in terror, and many burned to death. When the bombardment stopped and the landings began, over three hundred machine guns and a thousand riflemen fired from bunkers and sandbags at the invaders.

OOC: This guy sounds like he doesn't know what's he doing. @ The Great Qing

First he declares war on me because I'm Fascist, now he's going after Stok for being Communist.

OOC: I'm surprised Haven hasn't granted him honorary membership yet.

OOC: My bombs, if they fell into a city center, had to kill more than 100 people. After all, 648 of them fell.


Off the Coast of Tianjin

The frigates moved in position to fire their guns at Tianjin harbor, while they always had their anti-ship missiles ready to deal with the threat of ships attacking the landing force headed to the West of Tianjin harbor.

http://i278.photobucket.com/albums/kk83/Cashy3385/DontFeedTheTroll.jpg

OOC: I don't think he's a troll, he's not acting like one.

OOC: I don't actively seek to troll, I just find myself ending up to be a troll. I don't want to be one, but if I'm considered one, then a troll I am.

Fine. I lost 648 people. And refer to my cities using the correct names or else I'll stop responding.

So he dropped 648 bombs, and 648 people died. That means one person for each bomb. That is extrememly stupid.

I can beat that, I am thinking of declaring war on the WA, for no reason!

^That's just stupid NSU. At least try and read the stickies.

Glorious Federation of Svitlijrika and Marčrobina's King Andrej Tryszčzylić IV had effigy of evil heretic and tyrant Stuyonovich shot today at historic Firing Wall in capital of Vinča-Debrej, where traitors have been shot to death for centuries. The firing squad was awarded the medal of Glorious Hero of Svitlijrika and Marčrobina.

King Andrej said after hosting subsequent banquet in White Palace that he supported "odd little slanty-eyed yellow men in fight against tyranny".

OOC: Both are correct names, Qing. They're different forms of romanization for the same cities. Now, respond to my landing attetmpt.

Glorious Federation of Svitlijrika and Marčrobina's King Andrej Tryszčzylić IV had effigy of evil heretic and tyrant Stuyonovich shot today at historic Firing Wall in capital of Vinča-Debrej, where traitors have been shot to death for centuries. The firing squad was awarded the medal of Glorious Hero of Svitlijrika and Marčrobina.

King Andrej said after hosting subsequent banquet in White Palace that he supported "odd little slanty-eyed yellow men in fight against tyranny".

OOC: This, a shining example of epic win. Best newbie intro I've read, ever.

http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/d/dd/Singapore_MRT_Fines.jpg

OOC: What the blazes is a durian?

OOC: Durians are frikkin nasty things.

This,

http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/9/9a/Durio_kutej_F_070203_ime.jpg

is a durian. A pungent Southeast Asian fruit known for it's unusual taste, disgusting odor and hardiness. It can also kill people by falling off trees onto their skulls and impaling them with it's awesome death spikes.

ooc: Durians are pretty nasty seeds to a tree.

ooc: I dunno, I kinda like the taste of them

ooc: I've never had one, but they look kinda slimy. I've also heard they have a terrible, fetid odor.

I think my grandmother-in-law might have had one.

ooc: wow, this thread has really changed topic, from correcting quing, to condemming, to ignoring, to durians.

OOC: I've been laughing my ass off for a minute reading the posts about durians, along with the images.

OOC: Very well, I lost 1296 people. Now go away.

The rest of you, go argue about durians with Stoklomovi. And East Congee, I only use the Wade-Giles transcription. The other ones are silly.

OOC: StoklomoLvi bombed your nation with Durians. You can't just ignore him, you went to war with him as the purpose of this thread.

*Wishes he still had The Ryou Black Islands so he could conquer Qing

OOC: I remember making fun of TRBI. I hope that grammar/spelling black hole never returns.

OOC: This is why I love Qing's threads...they go from Mr. Chinaman declaring war from another dimension apparently, to durians (or the like...)

ooc: i'm loving this. if we have a vote for best thread of the year, this will be tough to beat.

OOC: I remember making fun of TRBI. I hope that grammar/spelling black hole never returns.

OOC: I resent that Remark.

OOC: I resent that Remark.

OOC: Sorry, just being honest.

OOC: Sorry, just being honest.

OOC Honestly, though, wouldn't a war thread between TRBI and Qing be awesome? Tell me you wouldn't read the entire thing. Truthfully.

I mean, it'd be epic. Ya know.

[OOC: If a war broke out between TRBI and the Qing, I would quickly glass TRBI and then continue the 1st Durian War with the Qing. I dislike the Ryou greatly.]

A missile flew across the Sea in front of Tientsin and exploded in Tientsin, sending thousands of small durians flying throughout the city.

OOC: StoklomoLvi bombed your nation with Durians. You can't just ignore him, you went to war with him as the purpose of this thread.

[OOC]
Durian carpet bombing ROFLMFAO.And this was so not worth a new page...

The terrible smell killed a dozen people and ruined a priceless building forever. Nothing else happened.

The bombardments blew up a wooden house and killed fifty civilians and a hundred soldiers.

OOC: Qing, respond to our landings.

To: The people that are "fighting" Qing
From: Gordonopian Enterprises

One of our companies recently attempted to add durians to their list of products. It failed miserably. So because of that, we have almost 1,000,000 pounds of rotten Durians. We could sell them to you for two cents per lb.

OOC: Give them to him for free.

Via a large bomb or missile.

ooc: good idea, I'll make a durian bomb. 1000 x 1000 lb durian bombs will be dropped soon!!!

OOC: To say Wade-Giles is a better system than Hanyu Pinyin is to say that a Model T goes faster than a Pontiac GTO.

OOC: Qing, since you have failed to respond to my landings, i'll send you a naval force you cannot deal with.

Hong Kong Unincorporated Territory, East Congaree

East Congaree had a goal to knock out Qing out of the war as fast as possible. As a result, six Modernized Iowa Class battleships, along with 20 Arleigh-Burke Class destroyers and 20 Ohio class submarines carrying cruise missiles headed to the Bohai Gulf, where they would hope to reduce the Great Qing's urban areas, along with all of her airfields, naval bases, power facilities, sanitation facilities, and water facilities to rubble. Hopefully, by turning Tianjin and Beijing to piles of rubble, the foe would let arms down and come to the negotiating table.

OOC: WOOT OWN HIM EC!

A man paddled his raft made of hollow durians. He had a partner with him to scout the Qing.

OOC: Soundgardens, TG.

100 TB-1 Bombers left a base near the... wherever it's called. They were each carrying 10, 1000 lb rotten durian bombs, which were sure to cause massive destruction wherever they were dropped.

OOC: Qing, respond to my landings and reinforcements for my fleet.

The durian raft sank on a rock.

The bombers dropped the durians on a mountain and the durians disappeared.

The ships from East Congaree managed to explode two houses, one warehouse, and three towers, and an old bomber carrying a 10 kT nuclear bomb flew over the tiny gulf leading into Tientsin. It dropped the bomb, and all of the soldiers defending Tientsin shielded their eyes as the bomb erupted in a fiery cloud. The shockwave killed thousands of fish, and the people of Tientsin grew angry at the war. Many left the city for Peking.

The Stoklomolvi ship was shot to pieces by the coastal defenses.

Official Message from the Aissurian Ministry of Defense

To:The Great Qing


We have declared war on you.



ORBAT
1 Yacht
Chuck Norris
Arnold Schwarzenegger
John Rambo

[OOC:Sorry for the god mode.]
7:57 pm, off the coast of Qing.

An event unforeseen by all. The combined awesomeness level of +343,323,231,212,144,666 was achieved on the Yacht. The normal human can sustain levels of +1.5 before suffering what has been called, "Total Brain Meltdown." As the levels rose and rose, the reactivity of the compounds that contribute to awesomeness rose. At 7:57 the compounds reacted with the stupidity of the Yacht, resulting in a chain reaction. There was an explosion never felt before, never dreamed of before, and mind shattering. The majority of the explosion was thrown to an alternate reality, completely destroying it. The remained of the explosion spread to 101st paratroopers, and The Great Qing. In a millisecond every person in The Great Qing had their brain actually explode. In 101st, it was completely wiped off the map. A Aissurian trade vessel entered 101st waters afterwards and was transported to the other side, like in Pac Man.

I win.

ooc: What the hell is wrong with you? You bastard

But the whatever the SA used actually hit KENAVT, OUR NEIGHBOR and the yacht was nuked to death, and with kenavt gone, the Ojavan citizens teabaged thier remains along with the remains of the SA citizens.

[OOC:No. You DO NOT joke about tea bagging. And I won't even start about "SA".]

ooc: Teabagging is awesome, and you don't joke about brainpowers and 101st either.

ooc: Are you going to declare war on me again? Because if you do, please wait a month or 2, I almost have my military compartments organized...

[OOC:I would if I still took II seriously.]

OOC: I bet this following post is GM'ing, rite?

The TCS Kestral, an Aigaion-class carrier, glided rather ungracefully over the capital city The Great Qing. Several million pounds (read: 4,961,250lbs) of durians rained down, causing much chaos, carnage and confusion. The stench was almost overwhelming and some people simply collapsed as the putrid fruit burst around them. Some people were impaled by hordes of durians, their sharp spikes embedding themselves into their body.

Whatever the cause, hundreds if not thousands of people died painful, smelly deaths at the hands of Techno-Soviet Navy.

ooc: Umm... what do you mean by II?

OOC: Both of you GTFO.

ooc: I might declare war on you, but right now i'm a bit busy.

OOC: II = International Incidents

ooc: Oh, I thought the II meant two or something sorry.

The bombers reached the qing capitol, and released their payload of fruity destruction upon it, killing all in the city. A lone paratrooper in a hazmat suit leaped out of the plane, and promptly raised a Gordonopian flag on the capitol building.

:)

OOC: This has gotten too ridiculous. I've retconned and withdrawn from this.

To: The Empire of The Great Qing
From: Empress Akihino of The Empire of Shima teikoku yokai

I ask you to stop all these Stupid War at once, it will bring no good for your People nor for your decedents if you continue these wars.

Stop now!

OOC: Don't I have a boat in your territorial waters?

The TCS Resonance, upon receiving the message from the Shima Empire, fired a cluster-durian missile.

"If you try to fault us for our fruity foreign policy...well we got more where that came from!" the reply said, in the form of a small note taped to one of the durians and signed by the captain.

This particular durian was excessively large, about the size of a large pumpkin or human being.

It exploded with an extraordinarily disgusting odor, even for a durian and sprayed it's fruity, smelly contents across a small field.

<snip> stop godmoding or I'll... <snip> [paraphrased]

ooc: I would respectfully suggest that threatening someone who is godmoding low casualties with inflicting more casualties is not, ultimately, a productive way to spend your time. I would instead advise the traditional remedy which is merely to leave the thread...

(OOC: And if you want to be asses about it, given how little SEAD and reconnaissance you did before dropping 100 bombs, you're lucky if you killed anyone. I would have taken 0 casualties, and laughed my way to your capital when you told me I was taking too few. Failed anti-troll action is failed.)

(OOC: And if you want to be asses about it, given how little SEAD and reconnaissance you did before dropping 100 bombs, you're lucky if you killed anyone. I would have taken 0 casualties, and laughed my way to your capital when you told me I was taking too few. Failed anti-troll action is failed.)

OOC: Apples and oranges here BG...your scenario would work if they were RPing against someone sane.

The Empire of Shima teikoku yokai offers to mediate a end to this war and stopping this foolishness.

The Stoklomolvi Communist Federation asks the people of Hatar- "Shima yokai" to leave us alone.

The Great Qing, having destroyed on of Stoklomolvi's ships, angered Stoklomolvi greatly, and soon after Stoklomolvi flew over a hundred paratroopers who would attempt to drop in Peking.

OOC: No more durians? Is this an attack with actual guns?

ooc: I'm still using Durians :)

[OOC: Techno-Soviet, please, you've trolled the troll. Now shoo. Same with you, Gordonopia. I'm going to overthrow the regime of this fellow and establish a communist puppet.]

ooc: but I just decimated a city with durians :(

ooc: Ditto. Can I help you, Stok?