Freidlichen
17-01-2009, 23:50
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Informative Pamphlet Regarding Freidlicher Bank Accounts
Introduction
Banking in Freidlichen is a unique, esoteric experience. Contrary to popular belief, a Freidlicher bank account is not just for the super-wealthy, or for criminals and dictators! In fact, though the Secure Banking Act of 1922 protects the identities of all Freidlicher bank clients, banks will not accept money from dubious origin, and will not do business with clients who may endanger the reputation of the bank.
Freidlicher Bankgesellschaft was founded in 1659 in the city of Altenberg, Freidlichen. As a result of its merger with the second and third largest banks in the nation, FBG has a virtual monopoly over the banking climate in Freidlichen, something the federal government has turned a blind eye to (the fact that most government officials maintain secret FBG bank accounts may have something to do with it).
Why Bank Freidlicher?
Many, if not all nations, have some sort of income or estate tax in place so that the government can siphon off funds from the individual. In the Freidlicher system of banking, every account is secret—if the banker discloses any information to anyone without the client’s consent, he or she faces up to five years in prison and a fine of 500,000 bundesmarks. Just because the account is secret, though, doesn’t mean that the client does not pay taxes—offshore bank accounts usually are still required to be declared by the nation’s government, and FBG does not do illegal business with any client.
A Freidlicher bank account, as it is secret, can be used as a safe storage point for funds in the event of a predatory lawsuit. We pride ourselves in establishing affordable accounts for doctors and people in high-up places who may be sued unfairly and lose the majority of their assets to unscrupulous lawyers. In these cases, a safe and secure Freidlicher bank account means that the individual who is sued has a fallback reserve of funds.
FBG bankers adhere to strict codes of conduct regulating how many accounts they may oversee. Banking in Freidlichen is a highly personalized experience, and bankers (called account overseers) are also skilled at making the client money through skillful investing. Of course, should the client simply want a secure environment to store their money, we welcome that as well.
Because we lend and bank on the international market, interest rate fluctuations do not affect us in the same way they affect normal domestic banks. Should the interest rates in the client’s home country plummet, he may be more inclined to open an account with us, where his money will be safer.
The main reason for opening an account is in fact our safety. Freidlicher law demands high capital adequacy. The bundesmark is one of the world’s most secure currencies, backed by about 60 percent gold reserves and with almost zero inflation. As a result of the Secure Banking Act of 1951, all deposits are insured, and in the extremely unlikely event that the bank goes under, depositors can be reimbursed for up to 95 percent of their assets (depending on the account). Freidlichen has never fought a war--ever. It is neutral in all matters of foreign policy, and so presents a unique opportunity for investors and bank clients to store money without fear of a major market collapse.
Who Can Establish a Bank Account?
Anyone! While it is true that corporations and high-up individuals often keep their money in Freidlicher bank accounts, anyone who wants a safe, secure, and personal banking experience may open an account.
What Sort of Accounts are Available?
Standard Freidlicher Account: Available for the reasonable fee of 900 universal standard dollars, the standard account will be opened with a subsidiary bank of Freidlicher Bankgesellschaft, though the money from the account can be withdrawn from any FBG branch. This option offers the lowest minimum balance ($25,000) while still retaining the qualities that make the Freidlicher bank account great—personal service and a secure environment.
Quality investment advice is available from the client’s experienced personal account overseer for no additional cost, and it is possible (and recommended) to take advantage of the account overseer’s experience by buying and selling shares and bonds directly from the client’s account.
Breakdown:
-Minimum Balance: LOW
-Monetary Security: EXCELLENT
-Account Secrecy: EXCELLENT
-Investment Opportunities: EXCELLENT
Premium Freidlicher Account: The premium account is mainly for people who want to save and invest their money to grow their personal savings—not to watch their money grow via interest alone. The account can be passed on to children, and is best for clients who wish to grow their savings over a longer period of time. A minimum of $100,000 worth of deposits are necessary to open this account, and the one-time opening fee is $1,200.
The premium account offers a wealth of investment opportunities for the lowest cost. The client’s personal account overseer has essentially spent his entire life managing the monetary assets of other people and can invest based on the client’s specifications. The client also has the option of letting his or her overseer invest as he sees fit, secure in the knowledge that the investment will be a safe and profitable choice. FBG bankers can invest client assets in monetary investments, bonds, stocks, precious metals, and structured products.
Breakdown:
-Minimum Balance: LOW
-Monetary Security: EXCELLENT
-Account Secrecy: EXCELLENT
-Investment Opportunities: SUPERB
Secured Freidlicher Account: The secured account is a cheaper alternative to the numbered account, and it requires less of a minimum payment to be accepted. Rather than being sponsored by the FBG, which offers up to a 75 percent return in the event of a bank failure, the secured account is offered by the National Bank of Freidlichen, which offers a whopping 110 percent return in the event that the bank fails or the money is lost in some way. This means essentially that the client’s money is so secure that we can say confidentially that we will pay them in the event that something should happen to their assets while they are in our care.
As this account is designed primarily for individuals who want their money secure in our hands, investment opportunities are more limited, though they still exist. The client’s account overseer can invest in bonds alone, and the National Bank offers bond funds, diversified and with differing maturities. The secured account is available for the one-time fee of $1,700, and the balance for the account must not be under $224,000 at any time.
Breakdown:
-Minimum Balance: MEDIUM
-Monetary Security: SUPERB
-Account Secrecy: SUPERB
-Investment Opportunities: GOOD
Numbered Freidlicher Account: Offered by FBG, the numbered account is the very definition of the secret bank account—the only time the client is required to use their real name is when submitting the application form—after that time, all transactions are done using the twelve-digit code number, and the client’s real name is not used on any forms, nor is it known to the account overseer (nor anyone in the world, save for the Freidlicher Banking Regulation Bureau, which is not permitted to gain access to the client’s name except for the purposes of a criminal investigation).
Investment opportunities are the same as those gained with the premium account option, and insurance is provided to reimburse clients for up to 85 percent of their assets in the event of a bank failure or similar calamity. The price for the numbered account is a one-time fee of $4,000, plus $100 every year the account remains open, and the balance for the account must not reach a level under $250,000 at any time.
Breakdown:
-Minimum Balance: MEDIUM
-Monetary Security: EXCELLENT
-Account Secrecy: OUTSTANDING
-Investment Opportunities: SUPERB
How Do I Establish my Account?
The standard and premium Freidlicher bank accounts can be opened by mail, though a passport is necessary in order to open any account. The client must physically travel to Freidlichen to open up a numbered or secured account, though this trip is often described as an experience in itself. This trip occurs after the application has been accepted.
Prospective clients will meet with the manager of the branch bank. During this meeting, the manager will ask a number of questions:
-Are you who you say you are?
-Why are you here; what are your intentions?
-Where did your deposit come from?
-How reputable are you?
-Are you a risky customer?
Generally these questions are a formality—anything the client has to hide has likely already been found by the time they enter the doors of the branch. Periodic checks are done on the activities of clients.
How Do I Get My Money Once the Account is Open?
Withdrawing money from a Freidlicher bank account is done differently from a normal bank, and is done in a number of ways to ensure secrecy is maintained.
The Freidlicher Cash Card functions as an electronic traveler’s check of sorts. When the client visits a branch bank, he or she may place up to $200,000 on his or her Cash Card, which can be replenished by visiting any branch bank. This method of payment is completely anonymous, as the card links directly to the Freidlicher Ministry of Finance, which issues the cards and removes the money from the client’s account to pay for the transaction.
Traveler’s checks may also be used, in addition to bank transfers, in which the branch bank in which the client’s assets are being held directly transfers funds to any other account in the world with no name attached (the name of the bank will be used).
Of course, the most secure way of withdrawing monetary assets is to travel to the bank itself and withdraw directly, though this is impractical for clients who live great distances away.
How Do I Close My Account?
While we would prefer that the client closes the account in person with a reason, closing by mail is also possible. A flat closing fee of $1,000 will be taken from the client’s account if there is not a valid reason for the closing of the account.
Can I Deposit Valuables in an Account?
Deposits of non-monetary assets are welcome, and will be stored in safe deposit boxes in the FGB branch in Bad Nenndorf, Freidlichen. This particular branch, nicknamed Fort Nenndorf, is considered to have one of the most secure vaults in the known world.
The vault itself is two miles underground, protected by an array of state-of-the-art systems which, for security reasons, cannot be completely disclosed. Roughly three hundred meters of concrete stands between the vault and the tunnel leading to it, the tunnel itself also protected by two like doors and rigged to release bursts of tear gas should the perimeter be breached.
As we cannot invest valuables, this option does not have an account name attached to it. If this is the option the client wishes, it may be specified in addition to or instead of a normal account name.
Application Form
Before traveling to Freidlichen to open a secured or number account, the prospective client must submit the following application form to the Freidlicher Ministry of Finance. Should the client wish to open a standard or premium account, this is the only step necessary, though a visit to Freidlichen is still recommended to get acquainted with the individual account overseer.
Name to appear on record*:
Country of origin:
Type of account desired:
Initial deposit:
(If applicable) Are we allowed to invest the money:
(If so) What are your goals for investment:
*if applying for numbered account, this record will only be held by the Freidlicher Banking Regulation Bureau
Establishing Branches of Freidlicher Bankgesellschaft In Your Nation
FBG is always looking to expand into foreign nations, and the economic benefit to gained by having such a massive corporation base itself in your nation is reason enough to be interested in the opportunity. Because Freidlicher banking laws do not extend themselves to cover branch banks based in other nations (such a thing would be a breach of national sovereignty), branch banks based in foreign nations must, in essence, become Freidlander territory, much like an embassy would.
Of course, no weaponry will be permitted inside the bank except the sidearms carried by bank security guards (and even these are optional for the nation in question, though that nation will then have to provide for the security of the bank and its contents), so the security risk to the nation is nil. Bank personnel will be hired locally, except for account overseers, who will be flown in from Freidlichen itself. Passports will need to be provided to prove that the personnel being hired are in fact citizens of the nation in question. The same functions preformed by the branch banks in Freidlichen can be preformed in the foreign branches, and secured or numbered accounts can be opened in any foreign branch of an FBG bank.
Inquiries about establishing bank branches in your nation should be made to the Ministry of Finance in Freidlichen.
Informative Pamphlet Regarding Freidlicher Bank Accounts
Introduction
Banking in Freidlichen is a unique, esoteric experience. Contrary to popular belief, a Freidlicher bank account is not just for the super-wealthy, or for criminals and dictators! In fact, though the Secure Banking Act of 1922 protects the identities of all Freidlicher bank clients, banks will not accept money from dubious origin, and will not do business with clients who may endanger the reputation of the bank.
Freidlicher Bankgesellschaft was founded in 1659 in the city of Altenberg, Freidlichen. As a result of its merger with the second and third largest banks in the nation, FBG has a virtual monopoly over the banking climate in Freidlichen, something the federal government has turned a blind eye to (the fact that most government officials maintain secret FBG bank accounts may have something to do with it).
Why Bank Freidlicher?
Many, if not all nations, have some sort of income or estate tax in place so that the government can siphon off funds from the individual. In the Freidlicher system of banking, every account is secret—if the banker discloses any information to anyone without the client’s consent, he or she faces up to five years in prison and a fine of 500,000 bundesmarks. Just because the account is secret, though, doesn’t mean that the client does not pay taxes—offshore bank accounts usually are still required to be declared by the nation’s government, and FBG does not do illegal business with any client.
A Freidlicher bank account, as it is secret, can be used as a safe storage point for funds in the event of a predatory lawsuit. We pride ourselves in establishing affordable accounts for doctors and people in high-up places who may be sued unfairly and lose the majority of their assets to unscrupulous lawyers. In these cases, a safe and secure Freidlicher bank account means that the individual who is sued has a fallback reserve of funds.
FBG bankers adhere to strict codes of conduct regulating how many accounts they may oversee. Banking in Freidlichen is a highly personalized experience, and bankers (called account overseers) are also skilled at making the client money through skillful investing. Of course, should the client simply want a secure environment to store their money, we welcome that as well.
Because we lend and bank on the international market, interest rate fluctuations do not affect us in the same way they affect normal domestic banks. Should the interest rates in the client’s home country plummet, he may be more inclined to open an account with us, where his money will be safer.
The main reason for opening an account is in fact our safety. Freidlicher law demands high capital adequacy. The bundesmark is one of the world’s most secure currencies, backed by about 60 percent gold reserves and with almost zero inflation. As a result of the Secure Banking Act of 1951, all deposits are insured, and in the extremely unlikely event that the bank goes under, depositors can be reimbursed for up to 95 percent of their assets (depending on the account). Freidlichen has never fought a war--ever. It is neutral in all matters of foreign policy, and so presents a unique opportunity for investors and bank clients to store money without fear of a major market collapse.
Who Can Establish a Bank Account?
Anyone! While it is true that corporations and high-up individuals often keep their money in Freidlicher bank accounts, anyone who wants a safe, secure, and personal banking experience may open an account.
What Sort of Accounts are Available?
Standard Freidlicher Account: Available for the reasonable fee of 900 universal standard dollars, the standard account will be opened with a subsidiary bank of Freidlicher Bankgesellschaft, though the money from the account can be withdrawn from any FBG branch. This option offers the lowest minimum balance ($25,000) while still retaining the qualities that make the Freidlicher bank account great—personal service and a secure environment.
Quality investment advice is available from the client’s experienced personal account overseer for no additional cost, and it is possible (and recommended) to take advantage of the account overseer’s experience by buying and selling shares and bonds directly from the client’s account.
Breakdown:
-Minimum Balance: LOW
-Monetary Security: EXCELLENT
-Account Secrecy: EXCELLENT
-Investment Opportunities: EXCELLENT
Premium Freidlicher Account: The premium account is mainly for people who want to save and invest their money to grow their personal savings—not to watch their money grow via interest alone. The account can be passed on to children, and is best for clients who wish to grow their savings over a longer period of time. A minimum of $100,000 worth of deposits are necessary to open this account, and the one-time opening fee is $1,200.
The premium account offers a wealth of investment opportunities for the lowest cost. The client’s personal account overseer has essentially spent his entire life managing the monetary assets of other people and can invest based on the client’s specifications. The client also has the option of letting his or her overseer invest as he sees fit, secure in the knowledge that the investment will be a safe and profitable choice. FBG bankers can invest client assets in monetary investments, bonds, stocks, precious metals, and structured products.
Breakdown:
-Minimum Balance: LOW
-Monetary Security: EXCELLENT
-Account Secrecy: EXCELLENT
-Investment Opportunities: SUPERB
Secured Freidlicher Account: The secured account is a cheaper alternative to the numbered account, and it requires less of a minimum payment to be accepted. Rather than being sponsored by the FBG, which offers up to a 75 percent return in the event of a bank failure, the secured account is offered by the National Bank of Freidlichen, which offers a whopping 110 percent return in the event that the bank fails or the money is lost in some way. This means essentially that the client’s money is so secure that we can say confidentially that we will pay them in the event that something should happen to their assets while they are in our care.
As this account is designed primarily for individuals who want their money secure in our hands, investment opportunities are more limited, though they still exist. The client’s account overseer can invest in bonds alone, and the National Bank offers bond funds, diversified and with differing maturities. The secured account is available for the one-time fee of $1,700, and the balance for the account must not be under $224,000 at any time.
Breakdown:
-Minimum Balance: MEDIUM
-Monetary Security: SUPERB
-Account Secrecy: SUPERB
-Investment Opportunities: GOOD
Numbered Freidlicher Account: Offered by FBG, the numbered account is the very definition of the secret bank account—the only time the client is required to use their real name is when submitting the application form—after that time, all transactions are done using the twelve-digit code number, and the client’s real name is not used on any forms, nor is it known to the account overseer (nor anyone in the world, save for the Freidlicher Banking Regulation Bureau, which is not permitted to gain access to the client’s name except for the purposes of a criminal investigation).
Investment opportunities are the same as those gained with the premium account option, and insurance is provided to reimburse clients for up to 85 percent of their assets in the event of a bank failure or similar calamity. The price for the numbered account is a one-time fee of $4,000, plus $100 every year the account remains open, and the balance for the account must not reach a level under $250,000 at any time.
Breakdown:
-Minimum Balance: MEDIUM
-Monetary Security: EXCELLENT
-Account Secrecy: OUTSTANDING
-Investment Opportunities: SUPERB
How Do I Establish my Account?
The standard and premium Freidlicher bank accounts can be opened by mail, though a passport is necessary in order to open any account. The client must physically travel to Freidlichen to open up a numbered or secured account, though this trip is often described as an experience in itself. This trip occurs after the application has been accepted.
Prospective clients will meet with the manager of the branch bank. During this meeting, the manager will ask a number of questions:
-Are you who you say you are?
-Why are you here; what are your intentions?
-Where did your deposit come from?
-How reputable are you?
-Are you a risky customer?
Generally these questions are a formality—anything the client has to hide has likely already been found by the time they enter the doors of the branch. Periodic checks are done on the activities of clients.
How Do I Get My Money Once the Account is Open?
Withdrawing money from a Freidlicher bank account is done differently from a normal bank, and is done in a number of ways to ensure secrecy is maintained.
The Freidlicher Cash Card functions as an electronic traveler’s check of sorts. When the client visits a branch bank, he or she may place up to $200,000 on his or her Cash Card, which can be replenished by visiting any branch bank. This method of payment is completely anonymous, as the card links directly to the Freidlicher Ministry of Finance, which issues the cards and removes the money from the client’s account to pay for the transaction.
Traveler’s checks may also be used, in addition to bank transfers, in which the branch bank in which the client’s assets are being held directly transfers funds to any other account in the world with no name attached (the name of the bank will be used).
Of course, the most secure way of withdrawing monetary assets is to travel to the bank itself and withdraw directly, though this is impractical for clients who live great distances away.
How Do I Close My Account?
While we would prefer that the client closes the account in person with a reason, closing by mail is also possible. A flat closing fee of $1,000 will be taken from the client’s account if there is not a valid reason for the closing of the account.
Can I Deposit Valuables in an Account?
Deposits of non-monetary assets are welcome, and will be stored in safe deposit boxes in the FGB branch in Bad Nenndorf, Freidlichen. This particular branch, nicknamed Fort Nenndorf, is considered to have one of the most secure vaults in the known world.
The vault itself is two miles underground, protected by an array of state-of-the-art systems which, for security reasons, cannot be completely disclosed. Roughly three hundred meters of concrete stands between the vault and the tunnel leading to it, the tunnel itself also protected by two like doors and rigged to release bursts of tear gas should the perimeter be breached.
As we cannot invest valuables, this option does not have an account name attached to it. If this is the option the client wishes, it may be specified in addition to or instead of a normal account name.
Application Form
Before traveling to Freidlichen to open a secured or number account, the prospective client must submit the following application form to the Freidlicher Ministry of Finance. Should the client wish to open a standard or premium account, this is the only step necessary, though a visit to Freidlichen is still recommended to get acquainted with the individual account overseer.
Name to appear on record*:
Country of origin:
Type of account desired:
Initial deposit:
(If applicable) Are we allowed to invest the money:
(If so) What are your goals for investment:
*if applying for numbered account, this record will only be held by the Freidlicher Banking Regulation Bureau
Establishing Branches of Freidlicher Bankgesellschaft In Your Nation
FBG is always looking to expand into foreign nations, and the economic benefit to gained by having such a massive corporation base itself in your nation is reason enough to be interested in the opportunity. Because Freidlicher banking laws do not extend themselves to cover branch banks based in other nations (such a thing would be a breach of national sovereignty), branch banks based in foreign nations must, in essence, become Freidlander territory, much like an embassy would.
Of course, no weaponry will be permitted inside the bank except the sidearms carried by bank security guards (and even these are optional for the nation in question, though that nation will then have to provide for the security of the bank and its contents), so the security risk to the nation is nil. Bank personnel will be hired locally, except for account overseers, who will be flown in from Freidlichen itself. Passports will need to be provided to prove that the personnel being hired are in fact citizens of the nation in question. The same functions preformed by the branch banks in Freidlichen can be preformed in the foreign branches, and secured or numbered accounts can be opened in any foreign branch of an FBG bank.
Inquiries about establishing bank branches in your nation should be made to the Ministry of Finance in Freidlichen.