Allanea
31-10-2008, 18:21
Orbit of an random uninhabitable system 500 light-years from Sol
Alexander Kazansky stood on the bridge on the SS The Fieldmarshal's Pride as the ship tore into realspace. Around the giant ship, shreds of matter spun uselessly – bits of rock, ice, and gas. The system housed no planets.
The Allanean President smiled as he pulled a youthful Girl Scout close to him. “Hey, Bambi.” - he chuckled - “Want to see something really awesome?”
'Bambi' was actually Beniella Ferrox, a random (though, as usually, attractive) follower of the Allanean President, chosen among dozens to accompany him on his journey. “Sure, Alex.”
“Well, look here.” - he pointed to the control screens, filling an entire wall of the bridge. On the screens, there was nothing but space debris, and the glowing sun of the new system.
Some centuries ago, Alexander's friend, Kevin Nivensky, had recruited his assistance in a giant scam, with which quadtrillions of dollars were wheedled away from unsuspecting foreign governments. In essence, it was something like Tom Sawyer's fence scam, except on a far grander scale.
The money could not be released on the Allanean market, for it would crash the nation's economy. The two men had hid most of it in secret accounts across the multiverse, in which most of the cash still lay undiscovered. Yet some of it was used – to purchase artifacts, secret knowledge, or colonies everywhere.
And now, Kazansky possessed the ultimate artifact.
He paced towards the control boards, the young Girl Scout following.
“How old are you, Bambi? Seventeen, right?”
“Yes, Mr. Pre- I mean, Alex.”
“Good.” - the Boy-President smiled benevolently, as he suddenly swept the young girl off her feet and onto the control board. He then kissed her passionately, even as his hand folded up her beige uniform skirt.
“Was this... the awesome thing you wanted to show me?” - the girl gasped a few minutes later, as the demigod broke off the kiss.
“Oh no. That's just the introduction.” - Kazansky smacked a button on the command console.
* * *
Around the ship, matter began to disintegrate, falling into the primordial soup that preceded the birth of Sol, that precedes the birth of all solar systems - and then, to reform itself, to swirl at incredible speeds around the ship.
The process was not energy-efficient – from the system, waves of hard radiation, of heat and light emanated in every direction.
* * *
“Oh God.. Oh God...” - somewhere in a different universe, Bambi heard her uniform buttons snapping rapidly, as the President grabbed the lapels of her shirt and ripped it off her in a single, fluid motion. She could not – nor did she want to – resist this, so complete was her intoxication with pleasure.
* * *
Within the first hour, the system was stripped clean of debris, and several large bodies have been created. Chief among them, hanging in a textbook-perfect stable orbit, was a newborn planet.
It had no life yet.
But by God, it had potential.
* * *
The Girl Scout twitched and screamed, pleasure rolling over her body in yet another paroxysm. For a few seconds, she could see nothing, as if blinded by her own extasy. She kicked haphasardly with her feet, her heavy combat boots, by now her only article of clothing, scraping against the control keyboard's surface.
* * *
The Old Testament story was now retold on the surface of this new world. Within the secnond hour, its athmosphere was born, capable of sustaining the most basic life. Then, its surface was covered with green grass, its oceans were filled with fish and algae. Trees, flowers, even cacti appeared on land, and birds screamed their first cries in the sky.
And then, there was quiet.
* * *
When Beniella regained her wits, she was lying face-down on the control board, wearing nothing but her glasses, combat boots and socks. She wondered for a second if she pressed something important – and then she heard something clank onto the board right in front of her head.
It was a flat-based, gold-plated cup made out of someone's skull.
“What the-”
“I made it out of a Doomani skull.” - Kazansky smiled - “It has a Pink Sunrise cocktail in it, and a straw so you don't have to get up to drink it – just lift your head a little, and there you go.”
“Why don't you want me to get up, Sasha?” - replied Beniella - “ Do you have something dirty in mind?”
“Well, does snorting crack off your back while I drink champagne out of this here cup -” he waved a different skullcup around, this time mounted on a thin 'leg' for drinking - “and make my press release announcement sound particularly dirty?”
“You want me to get naked on the ESUSnet?!” - Beniella chuckled at the image.
“You're already naked. Besides, I somehow think that any objections you might have to this will disappear once I tell you how much you get paid.”
Beniella's smile grew wider. She never intended to object, really, but once the money was offered...
* * *
And so, ten minutes later, the world was treated to an image of Alexander Kazansky, in an exquisite suit, standing in front of the control board, with Beniella between him and the viewer (the camera was helpfully mounted inside the infoscreen).
On Beniella's back there was a line of white powder, and she winked to the viewers as the President bent over and snorted the entire line through a straw.
Ah.... greetings, fellow sapients.
As you already realized, I'm Alexander Kazansky, and this lady here is Beniella Ferrox, from New Jacksonville, Weaver. That substance I just consumed is – was - prime Allanean Pharmaceuticals cocaine.
You may wonder why am I talking to you..
Kazansky takes a large sip from what used to be the head of the Lord of the Pits, the Dark God of the Antanjylians. Where was I? Ah, yes.
You see, Allanea has now in its possession devices that allow us to create worlds – entire worlds, yes! - from scratch within but a few hours. I own – hear me, own! - one of these devices as my personal property. I have just created a world in less than four hours, and I plan to rest for the entire week.
Just now, I have created a new world from scratch. It has a flourishing ecosystem. It is beautiful in every single way – just was this lady here, Miss Beniella Ferrox. Thus, I name the world's star after this fine young woman – Beniella.
“Oh, Sasha!” - gasps the Girl Scout.
Some of you have doubted Allanea, some of you have even hated us. That is all in the past as we step into a new age of affluence and glory. We now take a stand as our own supercivilization. For that is, and was always, our destiny – as Allaneans. As Freemen.
That is our future – no matter who, or what, shall try to stand in our path.
That is all. May God continue to Bless Allanea.
Alexander Kazansky stood on the bridge on the SS The Fieldmarshal's Pride as the ship tore into realspace. Around the giant ship, shreds of matter spun uselessly – bits of rock, ice, and gas. The system housed no planets.
The Allanean President smiled as he pulled a youthful Girl Scout close to him. “Hey, Bambi.” - he chuckled - “Want to see something really awesome?”
'Bambi' was actually Beniella Ferrox, a random (though, as usually, attractive) follower of the Allanean President, chosen among dozens to accompany him on his journey. “Sure, Alex.”
“Well, look here.” - he pointed to the control screens, filling an entire wall of the bridge. On the screens, there was nothing but space debris, and the glowing sun of the new system.
Some centuries ago, Alexander's friend, Kevin Nivensky, had recruited his assistance in a giant scam, with which quadtrillions of dollars were wheedled away from unsuspecting foreign governments. In essence, it was something like Tom Sawyer's fence scam, except on a far grander scale.
The money could not be released on the Allanean market, for it would crash the nation's economy. The two men had hid most of it in secret accounts across the multiverse, in which most of the cash still lay undiscovered. Yet some of it was used – to purchase artifacts, secret knowledge, or colonies everywhere.
And now, Kazansky possessed the ultimate artifact.
He paced towards the control boards, the young Girl Scout following.
“How old are you, Bambi? Seventeen, right?”
“Yes, Mr. Pre- I mean, Alex.”
“Good.” - the Boy-President smiled benevolently, as he suddenly swept the young girl off her feet and onto the control board. He then kissed her passionately, even as his hand folded up her beige uniform skirt.
“Was this... the awesome thing you wanted to show me?” - the girl gasped a few minutes later, as the demigod broke off the kiss.
“Oh no. That's just the introduction.” - Kazansky smacked a button on the command console.
* * *
Around the ship, matter began to disintegrate, falling into the primordial soup that preceded the birth of Sol, that precedes the birth of all solar systems - and then, to reform itself, to swirl at incredible speeds around the ship.
The process was not energy-efficient – from the system, waves of hard radiation, of heat and light emanated in every direction.
* * *
“Oh God.. Oh God...” - somewhere in a different universe, Bambi heard her uniform buttons snapping rapidly, as the President grabbed the lapels of her shirt and ripped it off her in a single, fluid motion. She could not – nor did she want to – resist this, so complete was her intoxication with pleasure.
* * *
Within the first hour, the system was stripped clean of debris, and several large bodies have been created. Chief among them, hanging in a textbook-perfect stable orbit, was a newborn planet.
It had no life yet.
But by God, it had potential.
* * *
The Girl Scout twitched and screamed, pleasure rolling over her body in yet another paroxysm. For a few seconds, she could see nothing, as if blinded by her own extasy. She kicked haphasardly with her feet, her heavy combat boots, by now her only article of clothing, scraping against the control keyboard's surface.
* * *
The Old Testament story was now retold on the surface of this new world. Within the secnond hour, its athmosphere was born, capable of sustaining the most basic life. Then, its surface was covered with green grass, its oceans were filled with fish and algae. Trees, flowers, even cacti appeared on land, and birds screamed their first cries in the sky.
And then, there was quiet.
* * *
When Beniella regained her wits, she was lying face-down on the control board, wearing nothing but her glasses, combat boots and socks. She wondered for a second if she pressed something important – and then she heard something clank onto the board right in front of her head.
It was a flat-based, gold-plated cup made out of someone's skull.
“What the-”
“I made it out of a Doomani skull.” - Kazansky smiled - “It has a Pink Sunrise cocktail in it, and a straw so you don't have to get up to drink it – just lift your head a little, and there you go.”
“Why don't you want me to get up, Sasha?” - replied Beniella - “ Do you have something dirty in mind?”
“Well, does snorting crack off your back while I drink champagne out of this here cup -” he waved a different skullcup around, this time mounted on a thin 'leg' for drinking - “and make my press release announcement sound particularly dirty?”
“You want me to get naked on the ESUSnet?!” - Beniella chuckled at the image.
“You're already naked. Besides, I somehow think that any objections you might have to this will disappear once I tell you how much you get paid.”
Beniella's smile grew wider. She never intended to object, really, but once the money was offered...
* * *
And so, ten minutes later, the world was treated to an image of Alexander Kazansky, in an exquisite suit, standing in front of the control board, with Beniella between him and the viewer (the camera was helpfully mounted inside the infoscreen).
On Beniella's back there was a line of white powder, and she winked to the viewers as the President bent over and snorted the entire line through a straw.
Ah.... greetings, fellow sapients.
As you already realized, I'm Alexander Kazansky, and this lady here is Beniella Ferrox, from New Jacksonville, Weaver. That substance I just consumed is – was - prime Allanean Pharmaceuticals cocaine.
You may wonder why am I talking to you..
Kazansky takes a large sip from what used to be the head of the Lord of the Pits, the Dark God of the Antanjylians. Where was I? Ah, yes.
You see, Allanea has now in its possession devices that allow us to create worlds – entire worlds, yes! - from scratch within but a few hours. I own – hear me, own! - one of these devices as my personal property. I have just created a world in less than four hours, and I plan to rest for the entire week.
Just now, I have created a new world from scratch. It has a flourishing ecosystem. It is beautiful in every single way – just was this lady here, Miss Beniella Ferrox. Thus, I name the world's star after this fine young woman – Beniella.
“Oh, Sasha!” - gasps the Girl Scout.
Some of you have doubted Allanea, some of you have even hated us. That is all in the past as we step into a new age of affluence and glory. We now take a stand as our own supercivilization. For that is, and was always, our destiny – as Allaneans. As Freemen.
That is our future – no matter who, or what, shall try to stand in our path.
That is all. May God continue to Bless Allanea.