Allanea
03-09-2008, 13:23
Troops! Lying before you is the new Federal Territory of New Liberia. It is full of savages of various kinds – a military dictatorship under a guy called Lucius Mbwana Kilaq in the South, various retarded tribes in the far north, and a few People's Republics in the middle. It will be your duty to bring this territory under the Allanean flag, and to help liberate its people from the various oppression they suffer – with the rifle, the grenade, and the blade.
I will not lie. This will be hard work. But this be noble work, too.
In North-Western New Liberia, the Hatomiri and Mamori tribes waged a war. Perhaps it was because the Hatomiri were Muslim – or perhaps they were living around a priceless diamong mine. Maybe the mine was not all that priceless. The point was, the Mamori had waged a war of extermination against the Hatomiri, and the Hatomiri retaliated with equal ferocity.
Villages burned. Ten-year-old boys were driven away into military service. Hyenas howled upon the piles of the dead.
East of them, there were the ruthless, slaveowning Gargali, who raided both tribes for slaves and troops. Yet further east there was the Midani tribe, which had been suffering from a drought- as a matter of fact, most of Northern New Liberia was suffering from various droughts. Where there were not droughts, there were locusts, or inflationary crises, or perhaps the crops were simply burned by some tribe or another. Perhaps as many as 20 million people in this part of Karain, divided into an amazing array of warring tribes, principalities, and People's Republics.
South of them, in what the Allaneans termed Southern New Liberia, and the locals called Dirania, lived 30 million people whose lives were bereft of wars – but only through the rule of Colonel Lucius Mbwana Kilaq, President for Life, Glorious Friend of the Children, Commander of the Armed Forces, Beloved Leader of the People, Founder of the Nation, Champion of Democracy and Defender of the Freedom of Speech. The style of Colonel Kilaq's rule can be inferred from the fact that he added the title 'Defender of the Freedom of Speech' after executing the leader of the oppostion's Diranian People's Party, his friends, supporters, and family, and then going after their friends and relatives – until about six million people had been killed or tortured to death.
The final wonderful feature of this landscape was the Karainese Liberation Front. It controlled wide swaths of what was called by the Allaneans 'Middle New Liberia'. Their purpose was, on one hand, to unite the tribes in the North and, on the other, tto end the Colonel's rule in the South. They pursued both goals through the means of Maoist theory and Karainese practice – namely, burning villages, drafting ten-year-olds into military services, and leaving behind piles corpses three meters tall.
The Allaneans dealt with the situation with the typical behavior of Allaneans. They parked a Force Projection Battlegroup off the shore of what was about to become their new colony, and announced to the New Liberians that they were now New Liberians, and that they were going to introduce them to truth, justice, apple pie and the Allanean Way whether the Karainese liked it, or not.
In Dinaria, the broadcast was accidentally blocked out by the interference devices that Colonel Kilaq had ordered a great expense in Saharistan in order to protect the morality of his people against indecent broadcasts. Elsewhere it was ignored by tribes who had heard dozens of announcements like these in the past and grew apathethic eventually, or had no navy with which to react, or were deep inland and thoughr the Allaneas wouldn't get to them. Yet others had no radios, or simply knew no English – the Alaneans, for some odd reason, did not bother to translate their advertisement into the several dozen local languages.
And yet, despite the fact most of the locals have not been aware of it, New Liberia had been founded.
24 hours after the founding of New Liberia, a single Allanean submarine had arrived within range of the bases of the Dinarian Navy and flushed its tubes. The Dinarian Presidential Defense Navy's pride and joy, the aircraft carrier DPDS Colonel Lucius Mbwana Kilaq (deck capacity – 8 aircraft) has been struck five times by P-600 missiles. Fifteen other missiles have been distributed evenly between the fleet's five cruisers – at which point the mighty Dinarian Presidental Defense Navy had been reduced to an array of patrol boats, an aged landing ship, and two container ships the President affectionally called 'troop transports'.
On the same day, a raiding party in the North, sent out by the Mamori tribe to raid a Hitomiri fishing village, had been targeted by Alanean naval cannon even as their technicals' wheels first bit into the beach sand. Not a single man went home to tell his tribesmen technicals are no good against 14-inch shells.
And as the third day of New Liberian history broke, elements of the Alexander Haig Mechanized Infantry division started making their way up the Marang river.
I will not lie. This will be hard work. But this be noble work, too.
In North-Western New Liberia, the Hatomiri and Mamori tribes waged a war. Perhaps it was because the Hatomiri were Muslim – or perhaps they were living around a priceless diamong mine. Maybe the mine was not all that priceless. The point was, the Mamori had waged a war of extermination against the Hatomiri, and the Hatomiri retaliated with equal ferocity.
Villages burned. Ten-year-old boys were driven away into military service. Hyenas howled upon the piles of the dead.
East of them, there were the ruthless, slaveowning Gargali, who raided both tribes for slaves and troops. Yet further east there was the Midani tribe, which had been suffering from a drought- as a matter of fact, most of Northern New Liberia was suffering from various droughts. Where there were not droughts, there were locusts, or inflationary crises, or perhaps the crops were simply burned by some tribe or another. Perhaps as many as 20 million people in this part of Karain, divided into an amazing array of warring tribes, principalities, and People's Republics.
South of them, in what the Allaneans termed Southern New Liberia, and the locals called Dirania, lived 30 million people whose lives were bereft of wars – but only through the rule of Colonel Lucius Mbwana Kilaq, President for Life, Glorious Friend of the Children, Commander of the Armed Forces, Beloved Leader of the People, Founder of the Nation, Champion of Democracy and Defender of the Freedom of Speech. The style of Colonel Kilaq's rule can be inferred from the fact that he added the title 'Defender of the Freedom of Speech' after executing the leader of the oppostion's Diranian People's Party, his friends, supporters, and family, and then going after their friends and relatives – until about six million people had been killed or tortured to death.
The final wonderful feature of this landscape was the Karainese Liberation Front. It controlled wide swaths of what was called by the Allaneans 'Middle New Liberia'. Their purpose was, on one hand, to unite the tribes in the North and, on the other, tto end the Colonel's rule in the South. They pursued both goals through the means of Maoist theory and Karainese practice – namely, burning villages, drafting ten-year-olds into military services, and leaving behind piles corpses three meters tall.
The Allaneans dealt with the situation with the typical behavior of Allaneans. They parked a Force Projection Battlegroup off the shore of what was about to become their new colony, and announced to the New Liberians that they were now New Liberians, and that they were going to introduce them to truth, justice, apple pie and the Allanean Way whether the Karainese liked it, or not.
In Dinaria, the broadcast was accidentally blocked out by the interference devices that Colonel Kilaq had ordered a great expense in Saharistan in order to protect the morality of his people against indecent broadcasts. Elsewhere it was ignored by tribes who had heard dozens of announcements like these in the past and grew apathethic eventually, or had no navy with which to react, or were deep inland and thoughr the Allaneas wouldn't get to them. Yet others had no radios, or simply knew no English – the Alaneans, for some odd reason, did not bother to translate their advertisement into the several dozen local languages.
And yet, despite the fact most of the locals have not been aware of it, New Liberia had been founded.
24 hours after the founding of New Liberia, a single Allanean submarine had arrived within range of the bases of the Dinarian Navy and flushed its tubes. The Dinarian Presidential Defense Navy's pride and joy, the aircraft carrier DPDS Colonel Lucius Mbwana Kilaq (deck capacity – 8 aircraft) has been struck five times by P-600 missiles. Fifteen other missiles have been distributed evenly between the fleet's five cruisers – at which point the mighty Dinarian Presidental Defense Navy had been reduced to an array of patrol boats, an aged landing ship, and two container ships the President affectionally called 'troop transports'.
On the same day, a raiding party in the North, sent out by the Mamori tribe to raid a Hitomiri fishing village, had been targeted by Alanean naval cannon even as their technicals' wheels first bit into the beach sand. Not a single man went home to tell his tribesmen technicals are no good against 14-inch shells.
And as the third day of New Liberian history broke, elements of the Alexander Haig Mechanized Infantry division started making their way up the Marang river.