NationStates Jolt Archive

Official Statement from the Dominion of Gwljdodnfyglijjijip

Good day.

I am.... Zombie Mutant Overlord Ztloxyllikt. For too long, my indomitable ... legions have been forced to .... shall we say, work in the shadows, by the self-declared "forces of good". The do-gooder, kindness-of-the-human-heart, warm-fuzzy-compassion folks; you all know who I'm talking about. But no more!

I hereby declare a state of.... war. War, yes, against all who subscribe to these dumb, outdated philosophies that people can actually be nice to each other. War against every last citizen of Gwljdodnfyglijjijip whose breast is invaded by that sickening spark of goodness. It's time to destroy the old world order of happiness, love, order, and justice and replace it with a new order of fear, hatred, chaos, and injustice to chill the hearts of evil people everywhere!

All those who stand with me, who wish to offer your support to my cause, I ask that you partake with me of a symbolic act of evil to display your willingness to support the rise of global chaos. Whether that be a large act, like brutally murdering ethnic minorities on torture racks, or a small act like turning on your turn signals and slowing down in the middle of traffic but then not actually turning, every little bit helps.

For my first act of war against global good, I have outlawed all coin denominations other than the penny, and have instituted a nationwide exact change policy. Bus tickets and sodas from vending machines both cost $1.99; stamps are at 33¢ apiece and are sold in rolls of three; et cetera.

Thank you,
Zombie Mutant Overlord Ztloxyllikt

http://www1.istockphoto.com/file_thumbview_approve/2241674/2/istockphoto_2241674_crown_icon.jpg

To: Zombie Mutant Overlord Ztloxyllikt
From: Damien Riso, Minister of Defense
RE: Declaring war on forces of good

Your declaration is preposterous.

Signed,
Damien Riso
Minister of Defense, Empire of ka-Spel

To Zombie Mutant Overlord Ztloxyllikt,

Lol.

President and Brigader John Batther

http://i197.photobucket.com/albums/aa29/zekosan/Diplohead-3.png

To: The Overlord of Gwle-Gewl-Nation A

You appear to be ill! Shall I send for a doctor? Perhaps I can aid you in your quest by obilerating your nation with my Orbital I.G.N.O.R.E Cannon! Do not worry! The ambulance with the Nuke is on it's way! Breathe slowly!

No Regards,
http://i197.photobucket.com/albums/aa29/zekosan/Tezla.png

Zombie Mutant Overlord Ztloxyllikt is unhappy that nobody is taking his declaration seriously. Therefore, he has ordered 1 million nukes fired at each of your nations. The nukes hit and destroy all of your countries and we WIN. :sniper: :mp5: :sniper: :mp5: :upyours:

OOC: Seriously, this is a serious thread. serious. I just have a kinda unorthodox RP style. So.... takers?

LOL:p:p:p

Seriously, Unorthodox RPing is very disliked by most RPers here on NS, even All-tech nations are disliked.

LOL:p:p:p

Seriously, Unorthodox RPing is very disliked by most RPers here on NS, even All-tech nations are disliked.

Yeah, well, Zombie Mutant Overlord Ztloxyllikt thinks your mother is ugly. (And who are you to speak for "most RPers here on NS", anyway?)

I argee with The Ryou Black. It makes you look low for using millions of nukes when you have the undead at your side. At least make it sound better

I wouldn't listen to Ryou. His is a god moder and the fumes are starting to get to his head.

OOC: Seriously, this is a serious thread. serious. I just have a kinda unorthodox RP style. So.... takers?

OOC: This is textbook godmodding, which doesn't earn you any points for style. It may seem unorthodox to you, but we kill about 50 threads a month like this. Kudos for spellchecking your first post and not using gun smilies until later, but drop it. No one is going to bite.

I argee with The Ryou Black. It makes you look low for using millions of nukes when you have the undead at your side. At least make it sound better

so like this?


Zombie Mutant Overlord Ztloxyllikt gnashed his teeth in anger as he read the responses. Nobody was taking him seriously, as usual! Extending his fangs he devoured the brains of the messenger who had brought him the unlucky news, then rushed to his computer and began to send a message to Strategic Command

[insert 7,000 word tl;dr post here]

and the nukes descended from the sky, using their perfect fail-deadly countermeasures to prevent any of the enemy missile defense systems, and all of them hit their targets exactly without any missing or turning out to be duds or detonating prematurely or anything. Devastation was total. The entire world was reduced to one huge crater and all life perished screaming in a hail of nuclear fire.

... so that makes it more acceptable?

anyway, can we have some more IC posts please?

No.