NationStates Jolt Archive

http://i5.photobucket.com/albums/y160/Roach-Busters/RBNNN_logo.jpg


"Hello, everyone, this is Walter Krankheit of RBNNN, the most trusted name in government-approved news. Today, our glorious leader and loving Papa, the Generalissimo, signed a new decree formally outlawing testing of all kinds on animals.

'Animals are precious to me,' he said. 'However, I do recognize the need to do medical and product testing, so I have chosen a suitable replacement for animals. From now on, those who wish to conduct tests may do so on so-called animal rights activists, vegans, and environmental extremists. This way, I am both protecting animals and eliminating subversives at the same time. Never let it be said that Papa does not compromise.'

Minuscule protests against this decree took place in RB City, but were quickly dispersed by security forces.

This has been Walter Krankheit of RBNNN. Thank you, and good night."

bump

To:Magdha


I applaud your decree for it is a noble one. Hmmm......and it gives me some ideas....



Icail va Ozzanil,President of The United Socialist States of Nosorepazzau

"I am honored that you admire my methods. I am also honored to have provided you with inspiration."

Generalissimo J.L.

The law from Roach-Busters concerning the use of environmentalists in lieu of animals for scientific testing was heard about in Upper Xen, and was met with a variety of responses. The official one was simply, "We find this legislation by Generalissimo J.L. somewhat unusual, a little amusing and perhaps morally questionable, though definetly, in a way, sound in its logic and definetly a way to encourage the use of human test subjects. We will leave the good Generalissimo to his own ways, since he runs Roach-Busters, after all."

The remnants of the Real ALM, meanwhile, had no comment on the act, though they were glad to see that Generalissimo J.L. was in fact alive.

The Binarian Empire fully supports this Decree, and hopes that it brings an end to much unessecary animal suffering and places it on those the deserve it.

"I thank you all for your support."

Generalissimo J.L.

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v209/Dionysus777/RotoviaSeal.gif
CONSTITUTIONAL REPUBLIC OF ROTOVIA
OFFICIAL GOVERNMENT COMMUNIQUE

To: Generalissimo J.L.
From: Ministry for Foreign Affairs (CRoR); with, for, and on behalf of the Crown Ministry for Foreign Relations and the Crown Ministry for Foreign Affairs
Subject: Policy regarding animal testing
Security: Diplomatic document, no digital encryption applied

Dear Generalissimo J.L.,

On behalf of the Republic and as instructed by the Commonwealth, I do condemn the actions of your government as a violation of human rights, unconscionable conduct and flagrant disregard for human dignity.

We recognise and respect there exist varying opinions on the use of animals in testing (the practice is outlawed in most cases within the Republic), however cannot abide the position taken by your government and will be forced to certify your nation as "a known violator of human rights" if the policy is not reversed within a seven (7) day period, from the issue of this communique.

[signed]
Senator Matthew Peterson
5th Baron of Aroix
Minister for Crown Relations
Acting Minister for Foreign Affairs

"While Senator Peterson is certainly entitled to his opinion, I must respectfully disagree with it, and I politely - but firmly - reject any criticism of my government. RB's internal affairs are just that, internal. They have no bearing whatsoever for anyone else."

Generalissimo J.L.

http://i237.photobucket.com/albums/ff41/838millionman/Grealflagv2.jpg?t=1205392782
Official Greal Statement


The Imperial Republic of Greal applauds the Roach Busters for this decree. Animals have always suffered from testing, and we hope this decree will teach other nations not to test on animals.

We had a similar decree made in public 4 years ago.

regards,
Minister of Foreign Affairs
Raul Riddle

"Your support is welcomed and appreciated, Minister Riddle."

Generalissimo J.L.

Official Church Statement:

"While we understand the reasoning behind this and no one can question the heart behind it, questions are raised about the future of medical advances in Magdha. Without the ability to test new medicines on animals, this leaves human test subjects. Some will die, some will suffer terrible side-affects, and some will be fine. This statement does not condemn your actions for the the Great Holy Marsh has not told us to condemn it, but we are unsure about the future. Testing on those who you deem as "subversives" is a tight rope, as the international court may deem it fit to call for your arrest. We hope that the decision you have made is the correct one, and indeed, pray for it. We also pray for the victims of this policy as well as for the lives of those who will carry it out."

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v209/Dionysus777/RotoviaSeal.gif
CONSTITUTIONAL REPUBLIC OF ROTOVIA
OFFICIAL GOVERNMENT COMMUNIQUE

To: Generalissimo J.L.
From: Ministry for Foreign Affairs (CRoR); with, for, and on behalf of the Crown Ministry for Foreign Relations and the Crown Ministry for Foreign Affairs
Subject: Policy regarding animal testing
Security: Diplomatic document, no digital encryption applied

Dear Generalissimo J.L.,

With all due respect, I must disagree: the suppression of human rights, the perpetration of cruelty, and the disregard for human dignity anywhere is the business of all nations of conscience.

[signed]
Senator Matthew Peterson
5th Baron of Aroix
Minister for Crown Relations
Acting Minister for Foreign Affairs

Official Statement of the Free Republic of Kahanistan

The Government of Kahanistan has its own very strict laws regarding animal testing. We prefer to use human volunteers or computer simulations in most cases.

However, we strongly object to the Nazi-esque practice of medical experimentation on those who have not given informed consent. This is a practice straight out of the Third Reich and must be condemned by all civilised nations.

We are in the process of integrating very large numbers of refugees from nations on our list of human rights violators and are willing to take in those who would otherwise be condemned.

Signed,
Dragomir Karovic,
Minister of Foreign Affairs

http://i41.photobucket.com/albums/e267/Flaw3dLegacy/kochpharmasmall.gif

Encrypted Company Communication
FROM: Koch Pharmaceuticals International Relations Department
TO: Government of Roach-Busters

Koch Pharmaceuticals wishes to congratulate Generalissimo J.L on his recent election victory. Allow us to introduce ourselves; we are one of the largest pharmaceutical companies in the Federal Republic of Hamilay, with over 56% of market share. Recently we had the pleasure of announcing a $560bn profit for the previous financial year. We must say we do not completely agree with Roach-Busters' new policy on animal rights, as a company which believes in the utility of humane animal testing in research and development. However, we greatly appreciate that the Generalissimo has managed to provide a compromise in the interests of science. To get to the point, Koch Inc. wishes to establish facilities in Roach-Busters to take advantage of the opportunity offered by human test subjects. Our initial investment would consist of one major facility for the purposes of pharmaceutical research and development, employing 10,000 people and with a total value of approximately $250bn. Incidentally, we would also consider this an opportune time to market our products in your nation. Please advise if this would be acceptable.

Best regards.

Dr. Martin Harrison
Department of International Relations
Koch Pharmaceuticals

Official Church Statement:

"While we understand the reasoning behind this and no one can question the heart behind it, questions are raised about the future of medical advances in Magdha. Without the ability to test new medicines on animals, this leaves human test subjects. Some will die, some will suffer terrible side-affects, and some will be fine. This statement does not condemn your actions for the the Great Holy Marsh has not told us to condemn it, but we are unsure about the future. Testing on those who you deem as "subversives" is a tight rope, as the international court may deem it fit to call for your arrest. We hope that the decision you have made is the correct one, and indeed, pray for it. We also pray for the victims of this policy as well as for the lives of those who will carry it out."

"I am very sorry if my policies make the international community squeamish. I do not intend to deliberately antagonize any nation or stoke up bad feelings. I do ask, however, that they respect my nation's sovereignty, for I would grant them the same courtesy."

Generalissimo J.L.

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v209/Dionysus777/RotoviaSeal.gif
CONSTITUTIONAL REPUBLIC OF ROTOVIA
OFFICIAL GOVERNMENT COMMUNIQUE

To: Generalissimo J.L.
From: Ministry for Foreign Affairs (CRoR); with, for, and on behalf of the Crown Ministry for Foreign Relations and the Crown Ministry for Foreign Affairs
Subject: Policy regarding animal testing
Security: Diplomatic document, no digital encryption applied

Dear Generalissimo J.L.,

With all due respect, I must disagree: the suppression of human rights, the perpetration of cruelty, and the disregard for human dignity anywhere is the business of all nations of conscience.

[signed]
Senator Matthew Peterson
5th Baron of Aroix
Minister for Crown Relations
Acting Minister for Foreign Affairs

"Senator Peterson, I thank you again for sharing your honest opinion. If there is one thing I like, it is honesty. My mother raised me to be honest, and I respect those who show integrity. However, I must ask you again, to please not concern yourself with matters that do not effect your nation. Thank you."

Generalissimo J.L.

Official Statement of the Free Republic of Kahanistan

The Government of Kahanistan has its own very strict laws regarding animal testing. We prefer to use human volunteers or computer simulations in most cases.

However, we strongly object to the Nazi-esque practice of medical experimentation on those who have not given informed consent. This is a practice straight out of the Third Reich and must be condemned by all civilised nations.

We are in the process of integrating very large numbers of refugees from nations on our list of human rights violators and are willing to take in those who would otherwise be condemned.

Signed,
Dragomir Karovic,
Minister of Foreign Affairs

"Your objections have been duly noted. I am very sorry if you take offense to our policies, but it has never been my policy to fashion my actions on world opinion, nor will it ever be my policy to do so. You are free of course to condemn me, and I am just as free to curtly offer a rebuttal or to ignore your unwarranted criticism outright. Good day."

Generalissimo J.L.

http://i41.photobucket.com/albums/e267/Flaw3dLegacy/kochpharmasmall.gif

Encrypted Company Communication
FROM: Koch Pharmaceuticals International Relations Department
TO: Government of Roach-Busters

Koch Pharmaceuticals wishes to congratulate Generalissimo J.L on his recent election victory. Allow us to introduce ourselves; we are one of the largest pharmaceutical companies in the Federal Republic of Hamilay, with over 56% of market share. Recently we had the pleasure of announcing a $560bn profit for the previous financial year. We must say we do not completely agree with Roach-Busters' new policy on animal rights, as a company which believes in the utility of humane animal testing in research and development. However, we greatly appreciate that the Generalissimo has managed to provide a compromise in the interests of science. To get to the point, Koch Inc. wishes to establish facilities in Roach-Busters to take advantage of the opportunity offered by human test subjects. Our initial investment would consist of one major facility for the purposes of pharmaceutical research and development, employing 10,000 people and with a total value of approximately $250bn. Incidentally, we would also consider this an opportune time to market our products in your nation. Please advise if this would be acceptable.

Best regards.

Dr. Martin Harrison
Department of International Relations
Koch Pharmaceuticals

"Dr. Harrison, after careful evaluation and scrutinizing every pro and con, I have come to the decision to accept your offer. I also thank you for your kind words of congratulations."

Generalissimo J.L.

bump