NationStates Jolt Archive

New Masada, Kahanistan

Kahanistan had made many controversial decisions since beginning to rebuild from the latest war with the Doomani. Chief among them had been to accept a deal with Praetonia - ten years of massive investment, welfare subsidies, and a huge grant of sixteen trillion USD, in exchange for allowing the Praetonians to run unrestricted capitalism in Kahanistan and block unilateral declarations of war.

While there was now a dispute over whether or not the treaty allowed the deployment of military forces to protect citizens abroad without further aggressive action, most people in Kahanistan had full bellies and good jobs, even if they were being paid a little less than they had been before the wars. Massive foreign aid from not just Praetonia but Allanea and other powerful nations meant that Kahanistan now once again had a standard of living comparable to that of Western Europe.

However, all was not well. The war had reduced the population by over 90%, from nearly six billion to about two hundred million. The people were no longer starving, but the labour force to build sufficient infrastructure to create a self-sufficient economy was not there anymore. Foreign aid was still pouring in, but it was being split between defence and building new infrastructure - roads, airports, military bases, offshore drilling platforms, etc. The foreign aid would only continue for so long until it was cut off, either because the donors couldn't afford it, or they were sick of seeing it disappear into a third world shithole.

President Nadia Sklenova, an avowed communist, had long advocated mass immigration into Kahanistan. Now that a labour force was needed and people were not starving, this was more feasible than when they were struggling to rebuild. The Nationalist Party, a moderate right-wing political faction that controlled the Senate, agreed with her as immigration from the right countries (those with appalling human rights records) was a way of defending human rights without costly military interventions that the Praetonians could veto, or losing millions of soldiers that they could ill afford to replace, when training a soldier took four months and the officer corps had been decimated. They were, however, apprehensive about letting in those who weren't willing to assimilate. The Liberal and Democratic Parties, the former a moderate leftist party and the latter more centrist, supported them as well as long as the immigrants were willing to work. They didn't generally care about assimilation.

---

The Senate adopted the People's Protection Act of 2008, by a vote of 819 to 181. The Act provided for facilitating unlimited immigration for any escaped slave, victim of economic, political, religious, or ethnic persecution, or torture victim. The Constitution already prohibited extradition to nations that practiced capital punishment or torture.

The immigrants would be given free instruction in one of Kahanistan's four official languages: Arabic, English, Hebrew, or Latin. Of course, many would come in already speaking one or more of those languages. Job training was often given by companies, but the Act also provided for free education to the Ph.D. level (though many citizens found jobs with just a B.A. or B.S.), housing and basic subsistence.

Cynics claimed that the Act was merely a political weapon to keep the foreign aid flowing, but its proponents insisted that a larger population would require more jobs and therefore less dependence on foreign aid. Others feared terrorists would flood in as "refugees" and commit terrorist acts. After all, firearms were virtually unregulated in Kahanistan; many firearms sold over the counter had no serial numbers, and those paranoid about invasions often drove technicals.

Following the One-Day War, the Empire of the Wolf had resorted to massive immigration from its overseas territories in order to rebuild itself and restore its population. What had formerly been a fairly hemogenous bloc of Skgorrians and Atopians was quickly becoming a diverse mix of Skgorrians, Atopians, Grosstapians, Chinese, Africans and South Americans, as well as demobilised or retired troops from the foreign legions. Nonetheless there were still those who felt that the Empire was not open enough for them or that they simply didn't like it there, and were drawn to Kahanistan by the promises of free education. A few thousand would make it there, telling stories of how in the Empire personal freedoms were restricted, the police were everywhere and freedom of worship was all but banned in favour of the cult of the God-Wolf. Perhaps even more worrying would be those who told with worried eyes of the increasing rise in popularity of Nazism on the streets and in mainstream culture, to the extent that even the SS had been reformed and had already seen war.

Of course, in some cases people would be exaggerating in the hopes that the immigration officals would take pity on them, but more often than not these people were telling the truth.

Message from Fatahland

We hope that you accept 20,000,000 kulaks, Christians, and anti-Fatahlandi intellectuals. They will be either deported to your nation, or properly punished for their crimes.

CMI5 Building, Darwin, Questralia

"Not exactly unpredictable." The tall and lanky intelligence officer, a contrast to his superior who had been described as a "couple burgers too many", gave his opinion.

"True enough." His superior looked over the reports. In the past month, sixty-two thousand black slaves had escaped the country, breaking free of their plantations and making their way west to "philanthropist" volunteers with boats. Their apparent destination: Kahanistan. Of a total slave population of 80 million, the largest in the Empire, it was obvious that something had to be done to contain this before it spread to other plantations that Kahanistanis were taking in black escaped slaves.

"Thoughts?" The assembled group of officers were asked by the station commander at CMI5 Darwin as he leaned back and sipped a cold coke. He didn't do alot of work himself and had mostly been promoted through a good deal of brown-nosing.

"Well, first we ought to tell all the plantation owners. There's not alot we can do about escapists, but I suppose the Navy could try track down these philanthropists..."

There was general agreement that there was little the authorities could do. Over the following months, Op.Ratcatcher stopped a mere 20% of escapees, and by the time a year had passed, almost a million slaves had escaped, thanks to the efforts of foreign and internal 'terrorists.'

These escapees, who sought a future in Kahanistan, a country where they believed they would be valued as human beings, had a literacy rate of 0%, and none could talk anything but a butchered English that had been instructed to them by their slave masters. Entire families escaped, from newborns to those that could run. The only age group left behind were those unfit to run from the helicopters and hounds that tried to recapture them. The Kahanistanis would have their work cut out.

In Kazansky's Office:

"Slaves? In Questers? I think it is time."

"What do you mean, Alex?"

"Well, you may remember we make, what, five hundred billion a year off the Confederate Central Bank?"

"That's, right, but what does that have to do with anything?"

"You will see. I wish you to inquire into the average price of a slave in the Questarian markets. Do it in such a way so it cannot be traced to me… and come back to me with the results once you're done Googling."

The cost of the Marsh prison system was not extremely high by any stretch of the imagination. Crime was low and most crimes that were commited were of a lower stature. Then, the harsh nature of the prisons meant very few would re-offend. Laws allowed for the liberal use of the death penalty, so very few serious offenders remained.

However, if there was one thing that angered the priests, it was those who failed to attend the weekly service in prison. 35,000 prisoners were rounded up.


To: Kahanistan
From: The Holy Marsh

Would you please take these inamtes off of our hands? None of them have commited violent or sexual crimes, and theitr lack of church attendance means they don't really fit in with our system. They should work hard for you, given how you would have given them a second chance

______________________________________________________

To: The Praetorian Vassal State of Kahanistan
From: The Realm of Cotland
Subject: Immigration to Kahanistan
______________________________________________________

To whom it may concern.

While the Realm seriously questions the legality of this unilateral (and most likely unapproved) move by the vassal state of Kahanistan, we wish to take advantage of this unique offer from the Kahanistani provincial rulling council. We currently have a number of... undesirables that faces a rather gloomy future in Cotland.

However, in His Benevolence, His Most Glorious Majesty the King has made use of His Powers and commuted the punishment of these undesirables from imprisonment and/or execution to merely stripping these undesirables of their citizenship and deporting them from the Fatherland.

Of course, this is among the worst punishments that a Cot can be given, and especially if they risk being deported to a undeveloped, dirt-poor third world garbage dump such as Kahanistan - which only survives as a semi-autonomous dependenacy of the Praetonian Crown due to the patient benevolence that Praetonia shows upon the Kahanistani subhumans - it is argued from some closet socialists here at home that it's better for them than the alternative. His Majesty's Council disagrees, but has determined that exporting these undesirables will be less resource-demanding than the alternative.

Therefore, the Realm is willing to deport approximately five thousand undesirables to Kahanistan if you want them. We warn you though: These undesirables are highly dangerous, having made themselves guilty of Rape, Rutial Murder, Marxist-Leninism, Less Serious Crimes against the Realm, Babykilling, Lutefisk Smuggling, Plotting to commit Treason, Practicing Satanism, Publically Insulting His Majesty, or an unhealthy cocktail of the beforementioned crimes.

If you want these undesirables, they're yours and good riddance. Better that they are sent to your already morally corrupt dependancy than they take up valuable space in Cottish prison camps. We warn you though: This offer is contingient upon the fact that Praetonia decides that your unilatteral and borderline-treacherous move against the Praetonian Crown isn't illegal.

[signed]
Martin Kolberg
Deputy Underassistant to the Assistant of the Secretary to the Junior-Most Aide to the Secretary to the Doorman to the Assistant to the Junior Vice Deputy Department Head for Extra-Havenic Affairs
Royal Ministry for Affairs Beyond the Borders of the Realm
The Realm of Cotland

We are most willing to take in these Cottish refugees. Given the history of Praetonia in intervening in the cause of human rights by military force, and the only obligation they place upon us being to accept their business investments and not bring war here, it is likely they will not oppose this move - it saves millions from repression and saves the lives of our soldiers who might otherwise fight and die abroad.

These people would have the same jobs as our own citizens; they would unfortunately be 'cheap' labour, though no cheaper than any citizen of comparable education. Our society has long ago learned that discrimination is not an acceptable thing in a modern society, with the exception of the fringe right who blames all Catholics for the crimes of the Doomani, and their Nazi and racist allies.

Signed,
Nadia Sklenova,
President of Kahanistan

P.S. I'm a proud Marxist-Leninist myself. This is not a dictatorship; the population here is free to criticise me and many do.

---

The government readily took in the few thousand Skgorrians and secularists from the Holy Marsh. They had budgeted for millions, and were surprised when only a few thousand came in. The Fatahlandis were welcomed with open arms; taking them in would show the world that Kahanistan was still a hospitable place for Christians, and weaken the credibility of Doomani propaganda showing it as an anti-Christian hell hole. There were undoubtedly Catholics among these Christians, and many of the "anti-Fatahlandi intellectuals" were probably quite loyal in fact - if the President's hunch was right and this was a Stalinist society. Sklenova was communist, but saw Stalinism as a giant cult and not aimed at bettering the lives of the people. She tended to focus less on dogma and more on what actually helped equality among the people.

The Questarians were, of course, a bone of contention. Some people thought they might be spies pretending not to speak English. Others didn't like the idea of deliberately throwing open the doors to citizens of a nation that had invaded without provocation. Some people thought they might have been indoctrinated in the same views as the citizenry of Questers, but it was pointed out that many of them may have already been citizens, prisoners of war - blacks were a minority in Kahanistan numbering in the tens of millions. Given their 0% literacy rate, this was unlikely as almost all people in Kahanistan who were not mentally retarded could read and speak basic English. In the end, it was decided to allow them in and drill them heavily. The Ministry of Education rejected the Critical Period Hypothesis (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Critical_Period_Hypothesis), but some criticised it as being ideologically motivated, as most teachers and social workers didn't want to just give up on turning them into productive, non-slave members of society.

While other nation's exiles may have been the scum of the Earth – pedophiles, Satanists, and so forth – Fatahland's dissidents were almost all educated people or former dissidents. The former Kulaks knew well how to run a business, and of the political convicts, 13% had a Ph. D., and 55% had a lesser academic degree. Many spoke three or more languages. If Kahanistan's leadership managed this new resource correctly, they would soon find the wealth of their country boosted to new, unprecedented levels.

"The Stratocratic Republic refuses to recognize the validity of this so-called People's Protection Act. Any traitors, saboteurs, subversives, or other undesirables who make their way to Kahanistan must be immediately extradited to our nation. We would not harbor Kahanistani criminals on our soul; we expect the same courtesy from Kahanistan."

Generalissimo J.L.

You and I have very different ideas of what constitutes an undesirable or criminal, Generalissimo. I'm a communist, as you probably know. I believe in equality for all people. You, on the other hand, ran an election in which no one else was allowed to run, so it is hardly surprising that you got 100% of the vote.

Our Constitution prohibits the extradition of persons believed to face a reasonable risk of death or torture. If a rapist or thief or violent criminal comes here, we will extradite if they are not executed, but we will not send people to be imprisoned, tortured or executed for the expression of their political or religious views. We do not practice capital punishment on our own citizens; we will not start on others - especially for actions which are not crimes here.

Signed,
Nadia Sklenova,
President of Kahanistan

"Although I adhere firmly to the belief that nations should be able to decide their own sovereign affairs, I do make an exception when that nation's actions jeopardize the security of nations besides itself - which, in this case, they clearly do. My government will not tolerate Kahanistan, or any other country, granting asylum to lawbreakers. Refusal to extradite any of our criminals will be met with the same response from us: Refusal to extradite any Kahanistani nationals that committed crimes in your nation. If you are willing to accept that, then, by all means, keep your new law."

Generalissimo J.L.

The massive T-31A Kondor transport decended towards the ground as it approached Kahanistan. In the rear of the aircraft, the crew chief opened the cargo bay door while the armed MPs inside the cargo bay motioned for the one hundred and fifty tied-up people inside the cavernous cargo bay to move. Some protested, but a few hits over the head with the rubber batons the MPs carried was enough to start a mass exodus out the rear cargo ramp.

Unfortunately for those people, they found that there was no solid ground awaiting them when they fell off the cargo ramp. Only a 200 meter free-fall down to the sea, where there was undoubtedly sharks and other nasty marine life waiting for lunch.

With the first shipment of undesirables disposed of, the Kondor closed its cargo ramp and changed course, heading for home again. Those few who actually managed to survive the 200-meter plunge would have a mere 500 meters to swim to the closest Kahanistani beach....

Jugo Beach, southern Kahanistan

In lifeguard station G, two male lifeguards sat in chairs observing the beaches and the bodies of female sunbathers.

"Nice, huh?" said Abdul-Malik al-Zubaidi to his comrade, pointing out the 36DD breasts of a young woman strolling topless by the station without a care in her head.

Daniel Rubenstein nodded as the woman passed. "Not a bad rear view, either..." His eyes followed the woman's rear end as she walked away until his attention was broken.

"What the hell is that?!" asked Abdul-Malik. An aircraft flying over the beach dropped something out of it. Screams were heard in the distance as onlookers gazed with emotions ranging from sadistic curiosity to abject terror.

"Doomies?" said Daniel, climbing down from his chair and retrieving his FN FAL. One might think Kahanistan was an unusual society because the lifeguard stations had military-grade assault rifles as part of their equipment, but they were generally used for shooting sharks from rescue boats. Daniel didn't think he'd use it in combat against a Doomani soldier, though - most people in Kahanistan were sick of war.

"Danny, Doomies don't fly that kind of plane... and bombs don't scream... and they tend to explode," said Abdul-Malik. He hastened to follow Daniel, who was running toward the beach blowing his whistle. When they got to the rescue boat, Daniel pulled his scuba suit on while Abdul-Malik drove. Half a kilometre out, they realised... they weren't Doomies, those weren't bombs... they were people. A woman's severed head floated above the water, having been ripped off by a shark. Daniel fired on it with his rifle, putting out its eye and causing it to retreat.

"Dan, you've got the scuba. Give me the gun, I'll cover for you," said Abdul-Malik. He got on the radio to call for help. Daniel threw him his weapon and jumped overboard.

Daniel dove to the bottom, wrapping his arms around an exhausted figure - a middle-aged Cottish man... tied up. He propelled himself hastily to the surface. This man couldn't swim tied up, and neither could the other survivors of the 150 from the plane...

When he surfaced, another lifeguard boat was next to his. A female guard tending to a Cottish child who'd lost a leg to a shark pulled the casualty aboard her vessel as Daniel dove to retrieve those others who had sunk. Her comrade was taking the boat to the floating victims to pull them aboard.

That day, 131 bodies were salvaged from the ocean, of whom only 47 were still alive. The Jugo Beach Lifesaving Association which employed the guards commended their acts of heroism and began to draft new procedures for handling massive disasters. The Kahanistanian government, on the other hand, angrily condemned the Cottish government.

Official Statement of the Free Republic of Kahanistan

The Government of Kahanistan condemns this method of delivery. Over two-thirds of the refugees sent here were killed by drowning or animal attacks before they could be pulled ashore. In future, land the aircraft inland and allow the refugees to be safely taken off.

Signed,
Dragomir Karovic,
Minister of Foreign Affairs

OOC: No children are being deported. Those who are deported are people who have been sentenced to various punishments by secret courts. The youngest deportee is 22. My bad for not pointing it out sooner.]

The Kondor returned safely to its base, where the aircraft was cleaned up and the aircrew and MPs were given medals for their excellent preformance of their duty. The next shipment of undesirables would be undertaken tomorrow, and it would be carried out in pretty much the same manner, only at a different beach. In the prison camp those unfortunate deportees were being held, military doctors dressed in NBC protective gear had been injecting the undesirables with something before they had their hands tied behind their back with plastic zipties and transported to the aerodrome and the waiting Kondor.

The next day, the Kondor was once again near Kahanistan, but the pilots were going to try another approach this time. They slowed the aircraft to almost stalling speed and flew at fifty meters before the MPs, dressed in NBC protective gear for the occation, chucked them out the aft cargo ramp. The Cottish believed that this would decrease the lethality ratio of the actual delivery phase, leaving the injected substance in the one hundred fifty men and women, aged between 26 and 57, to handle the actual killing.

When the Kahanistanis collected the survivors and gave them a medical checkup after the Kondor was long gone, they would find to their horror that the survivors were infected with an unhealthy cocktail of tuberculosis (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Tuberculosis) and rabies (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Rabies), with a few cases of smallpox (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Smallpox) included in the mix.

The Cottish would deny that they had deliberately infected the people with this of course, claiming instead that the people had already been infected with the deceases in prison. It was a plausible excuse, as Cottish prisons weren't known to be cushy clean places, but rather the proverbial hell on earth.

Not only were the 47 survivors infected with various diseases, but the guards who had rushed to their aid were also infected, as were many of the medical staff who had rendered assistance. TB and smallpox are easily enough treated by a nation with halfway decent medical care, but rabies was one hell of a sonofabitch to treat if symptoms showed. All in all, 570 people were sickened, of whom 196 died.

The Health Ministry didn't buy the Cottish denials. If a few of them had diseases, or even if most of them did, that was one thing - but if they all did, then that raised a red flag. The Health Minister wasn't well versed in foreign affairs, and didn't want to create an international incident at the same time they were trying to improve their international reputation, so he kept mum internationally, although he did voice his suspicions to the President. She wasn't so convinced. The Defence Minister wanted to shoot down the Kondor on its third visit, but the President said no, this was a way to improve Kahanistan's reputation as a protector of human rights without getting it into wars. She wasn't willing to have her pet project derailed by picking a fight with Cotland.

Children at local beaches asked their mommies and daddies why the guards were wearing those funny suits. They had taken to wearing NBC gear after the first two drops; it helped them come to the aid of those people coming ashore, but also made them look much less approachable.

Back home in Cotland, the Kondor had been disinfected and cleared for normal operations again by the chemical troops, but whether it would make the next flight to Kahanistan was uncertain. The generals were wrestling their brains, trying to find out other experimental methods of delivering the undesirables to Kahanistan, but thus far, usable ideas were either too unrealistic or just plain crazy. Strapping a rocket engine to the undesirables and launching them like missiles was deemed too low a chance of actually surviving the landing - the Cottish wanted roughly 1 % (or thereabouts) of the undesirables to have a real chance of surviving to reach Kahanistan. That's when a bright head in the Air Force got, well, a bright idea. Why not use a strategic bomber to deliver them?

And so, it was done. A B-22A Candrian heavy strategic bomber was hastily modified for the purpose by having its bomb bay equipment removed and the access doors to it equipped with locks so that the undesirables couldn't get out or destroy anything inside it, try as they might. Then, the undesirables were brought into the bomb bay, with their hands ziptied behind their backs and with hoods over their heads - the B-22A had a lot of secret technology aboard - by the MPs and placed in the bomb bays, sitting on the insides of the closed bomb bay doors with the MPs standing on the walkways above them, keeping watch. Unlike the last batch of undesirables, only a few of these deportees had any deceases, mostly TB contracted in prison that had gone untreated due to their low status and imminent deportation.

A few hours later, the Candrian was flying straight and level at five hundred meters, having decended from twelve thousand a little while ago, preparing to conduct its bombing run. It was approaching from the north, near Fort Neptune, and conducting a very realistic bombing run. They were almost sure to have the attention of whatever the Kahanistanis called an air defense force by now, so the pilots kept a close eye on the radar warning receivers and kept their hands close to the chaff and flare dispensers and self-defense cannon controls.

At one kilometer from the coastline - the harbor of Fort Neptune - and closing fast, the bombardier opened the bomb bay doors.

Any observer would see the almost 100 meter long grey-painted bomber aircraft open the three pairs of bomb bay doors, and see a lot of small objects fall out from the bomb bays. Upon closer inspection, they would see that it was infact human beings that plunged towards the water (and probably a few boats zooming around in the harbor), kicking their legs and screaming in sheer terror before they hit the sea.

The Candrian closed its bomb bay doors fifteen seconds after opening them, having disposed of their payload, and zoomed over the city, probably inflicting a lot of terror on the population too before it began its turn for home again. That was, if it wasn't shot down...

[OOC: Reading the thread (http://forums.jolt.co.uk/showthread.php?t=548527), your synopsis contains a number of errors concerning the agreement reached with Praetonia.

- Kstan accepted 20 years of laissez-faire, not 10, the diplomat simply thought to himself that he believed it would only take 10 to secure a renegotiation (which may or may not be true).
- "welfare subsidies, and a huge grant of sixteen trillion USD" these are the same thing - Kstan has been given ~$16tn in welfare subsidies. The actual providers are owned by the CPI, but will be made independent at the end of the 20 years and the Kstani government can either continue their funding itself, privatise them or close them down and open up some equivalent.
- Kstan also agreed to an 8% GDP cap on tax during this time, I'm not sure if the education programme is affordable on that basis given you are also purchasing a very large military.

However I cannot fault your synopsis of the change in the economic situation. Kahanistan will indeed be benefited a lot by this, the segregation between the SEZs and the rest of the country will disappear, and Kstan may indeed even appear a place that people would want to emigrate to.]

OOC: Isn't PRaetonia ostensibly responsible for defending Kahanistan? Would you even let these stratbombers by? And what's Cotland's IC motive in this 'attack'?

[OOC: Prae, Kahanistan's economy has been, and continues to recieve, large infusions of cash from Axis Nova. He has more money to toss around than would seem immediately apparent. ;p]

At more than five hundred miles out from Kahanistan's coast, the bomber is picked up by the network of radar aerostats installed off of Kahanistan's coast. An instant alert is sent to both air defense stations and to the Kahanistani government and air force, and anti-aircraft sites stationed on that coast go to alert as their missile launchers rise out of their armored covers, swivel, and aim towards the distant bomber...

Official Message from the Emperor's Office
TO: Dragomir Karovic, Kahanistani Minister of Foreign Affairs
FROM: His Imperial Majesty Emperor Conrad II
RE: Deportation of Criminals to Kahanistan

After reading this message sent in from my Foreign Ministry that Kahanistan is accepting immigrants, and after seeing that it does, indeed, accept criminals and those not wanted by the state, it has come to my attention that this is a perfect opportunity for Zukariaa to free up its prisons and itself of its barbarous criminals. As such, I request of the Kahanistani government that we may empty out our prisons into its nation. We are sure that everyone will be happy with the arrangements. Zukariaa will no longer need to worry about overcrowded prisons, Kahanistan will gain citizens, and the criminals will be free to terrorize at will.

Roughly one million four hundred thousand criminals of all sorts-rapists, murderers, burglars, terrorists, common thieves, and jaywalkers-will be included in this deal and will happily be given to the Kahanistani government to do with them as they please. These animals, we are sure, however, will not be content with freedom. They will terrorize your nation unless they are treated as they should be. A simple warning. We are sure that you do not, indeed, wish to have rapists and murderers or blasted jaywalkers running freely in your streets.

We are sure you will accept, however, and figure out a perfect way to reform them.

http://www.maj.com/gallery/Humhum/lolz/kaiser_konrad_ii_profile.png
SIGNED,
By the Grace of the Gods His Imperial Majesty Emperor Conrad II
Emperor of Zukariaa
Emperor of Shansekia
Emperor of Arterusia
King of Aiur
Archduke of Taradoxica
Head of the House of Hüron
Head Monk of the Zukariaan Temple
42nd Sovereign Ruler of Zukariaa

(OOC: This is the only possible way for it)

To: Kahanistan
From: Third Spanish States Neonazist Party
Subject: Some of us are tired of being beaten up by local ANTIFA punks

Some of us have decided, with much disgust, to voluntarily move to your Jewish nation because they are getting too old to street fight the ANTIFA punks or lack the stamina for punching those damn anarchists who insist on trying to beat us, and considering your official statement of accepting any newcomers, I hope you shall honor it. They shall be arriving pretty soon through a private business jet, in the hopes their white power manifestations and freedom of speech won't be any longer disrupted. They would rather build their own, small, possibly autonomous Aryan community inside your nation and as long as not bothered in their right of freedom of speech they won't interfere in big issues. By now they should already be arriving, as they really hope you shall honor your statement... although, with no lies and full honesty, I have serious doubts about you honoring your official statements to the fullest considering you are Jews after all. Well, at least they won't have to worry about punks going to fight them during their trip.

Adolf Macht
President of the Neonazist Party
Owner of Triumph of the Will (http://z4.invisionfree.com/NSDraftroom/index.php?showtopic=1590&view=findpost&p=2717762) E-Television

It was an actual 767 that landed on a Kahanistan airport near the coast, soon several skinheads with swastikas or apparently average adults came from it, averting their eyes from the local population and being very cold and reserved around. Most of them had the same physical features: a Germanic complexion, blonde hair(those who weren't bald) and blue eyes, and 1.90 meters was their average height. They did not seem to be intentionally looking for confusion, but perhaps the local population might not react so well with their presence.

Aboard one of the Su-30 MKI's patrolling the area around the northern city of Fort Neptune, a radar blip sounded in the cockpit. Lieutenant Moshe Levi, the pilot of the fighter, noticed it was a bomber. What kind of idiot sends in unescorted bombers? True, Kahanistan had done that with heavy Naram-Sin bombers from Kriegzimmer (against the advice of several influential generals), which had powerful air-to-air missile capacity for defence against enemy fighters... but this didn't look like one of those.

"Colonel... incoming bomber. Looks Candrian. What the hell are they doing here?"

"Hail them," said Colonel Yosef Sharanski. "Maybe they just got lost... but they probably want to bomb something. Must have gotten separated from a fighter group... shit! They're dropping ordnance! Shoot that motherfucker!"

Levi released an R-77 radar homing missile at the "Candrian" plane. "Motherfucker shot, Colonel."

---

The Neonazis and other criminals were allowed to come into Kahanistan. With immigration from all over the world, there were already many non-Jews there (overall, 75% of the population was not Jewish), and some did tend to congregate into their own communities.

B-22A Candrian, tailnumber BT-47965

The radar warning receiver suddenly started making a lot of noise, calling the pilots attention to the fact that they had a live radar-guided missile flying after them. The crew of the Candrian went pale, but their training kicked in immediately. The pilot started banking violently while the co-pilot released a healthy amount of chaff and brought the Candrian’s self defense weaponry online.

The B-22 Candrian was a Candrian design, and named Candrian by the Cottish in honor of the aircraft’s designers and builders. The Candrians had incorporated a lot of interesting designs into this airframe, such as a very powerful radar system that would allow the aircraft to act as a mini-AWACS, a few air-to-air missiles for self-defense, and four radar-guided remote cannons for point defense purposes, functioning as an airborne equivalent of the CIWS one normally found on ships. It was these which were now activated.

The two guns in question, the rear and the top gun, traversed to the general direction where the RWR warned of an incoming missile and prepared to try to stop the missile as the Candrian increased to maximum speed and dived, trying to use the proximity to the water to confuse the missile.

While the pilots were doing their best to avoid the missile, the bombardier slash radio officer frantically contacted home base via an encrypted radio channel.

“Starbase, this is Hawk 2! We’re being fired upon I say again, the Kahanistanis are fucking shooting at us!”

At that moment, the two double-barreled 30mm gast guns started opening up, sending vibrations throughout the airframe as they sent a stream of rounds towards the Kahanistani missile at 3700 rounds per minute.

Of course since they only had 600 rounds each, they ran out of rounds after just a few seconds, and the missile was still inbound.

Chaff had failed, the point defense guns had failed, and violent maneuvering had failed. As the R-77 missile impacted the Candrian and exploded just aft of the shoulder that connected the two massive wings with the fuselage, the three-man aircrew ejected safely, preparing themselves for the torture and what-not that was to ensue when the Kahanistanis got a hold of them while the mortally wounded Candrian bomber disintegrated as it hit the water some 60 kilometers north-east off Fort Neptune.

High Command, Eeobroht, Cotland

The operations room in the Cottish Military High Command was normally a hive of activity. Right now, it was completely silent. The generals, admirals, colonels and other officers stood there, staring at the big board that covered the entire western wall, where a big picture of Kahanistan was displayed. More precisely, the area around Fort Neptune, with a live satellite feed providing the data. They had received the emergency broadcast from Hawk 2 just moments before the Kahanistani missile threw precisely $574 414 330 NSD out the window, plus the millions it had cost training its three-man crew.

The Air Marshall – the highest-ranking officer in the Royal Cottish Air Force second only to the King – looked at the rest of the people assembled and finally spoke.

“We’ve got to retaliate.”

The people were in consensus, nodding affirmingly and showing their agreement. That was, until an Army colonel asked the critical question, “What do we tell His Majesty?”

Royal Palace, Eeobroht, Cotland

The King was sitting in the small park within the confines of the Royal Palace, sipping on a cool lemonade while watching his wife the Queen play with their son. It was one of the few rare breaks he allowed himself during the day, and one which he hated to be interrupted in unless it was something important.

Therefore, the arrival of five middle-aged men with their uniforms filled with gold and ribbons was rather annoying.

“Your Majesty,” The oldest of them, the Air Marshall, said after releasing the sharp salute he and the others had given the King. He knew that the King had little patience for beating around the bush when it came to military matters, so he went straight to business. “We have a situation. One of our B-22 bombers was shot down half an hour ago off Kahanistan.”

The King stared at the Air Marshall in surprise. After a few seconds of wrestling his brain to find out why there would be a bomber off Kahanistan in the first place and finding no answer, he replied.

“Okay… How is the crew? And why did we have a bomber there in the first place?”

The Air Marshall swallowed before answering, while the other officers avoided the King’s interrogating stare.

“Well sir, does Your Majesty remember signing the order deporting the undesirables a few days ago?”

The King nodded.

“Your Majesty did not specify exactly how we were to get the undesirables there, only that it should be done in a rather painful manner. Well sir, we took some liberties in deporting them. Like…” The Air Marshall swallowed again. “…dropping them out of an aircraft while over the water…”

The King’s stare of surprise suddenly changed to one of shock.

“It was very effective sir!” One of the other officers, a Lieutenant General of the Air Force said. “They were dropped from a Kondor a hundred meters above the water, a few hundred meters from the beach.”

“The trouble was, we didn’t think it was effective enough sir. We could only transport one hundred fifty undesirables per go, and we wanted to spend less than two weeks doing this job sir. So, we modified a bomber to transport them. It worked well sir. Four hundred people stowed into the bomb bays and dropped over the sea.”

“If it worked so well,” The King retorted, “Why the hell did we just lose a bomber?!”

The Air Marshall looked to the ground as he replied.

“The Kahanistanis didn’t think it was such a good idea sir. They condemned the whole thing after the first Kondor drop, but we didn’t think much of it. I mean, they’re Kahanistanis! Their brains are 40 % smaller than normal human brains according to the latest Doomani research. How can we expect a people with less brainpower than a chimp to be able to pose an effective resistance Your Majesty?”

The King could agree with that sentiment about the Kahanistanis, but not much about the way the Air Force had decided to handle the disposal of the undesirables. Using a bomber?! The King shook his head at the thought before he took hold of the situation.

“Okay, here’s what we do. First, dispatch a naval force to off Kahanistan. Tell them to keep well inside international waters. No need in letting the bastards try to take a potshot at our ships too. Next, prepare a sizable strike force with sufficient escorts. We’ve got to teach them that they don’t do something stupid like this and expect not to end up being a fourth world power. Third, contact the Praetonians and Clandonians. Inform them of the situation, but leave out the whole prisoner drop. As for the bomber, it happened to stray into Kahanistani airspace by mistake when the Kahanistanis conducted the hostile action of firing on it without first attempting to warn it over radio as it normal under such circumstances. Fourth, I expect the resignations of all those responsible for this situation on my desks when this situation is resolved, including yours Air Marshall. Now if you’ll excuse me, I’ll be in the situation room trying to get a handle on this thing!“

The officers swallowed as they saluted sharply again, waiting for the King to acknowledge their salute before they returned to the High Command to prepare for what was happening.


Encrypted Communiqué

To: Praetonia, Clandonia
From: Royal Ministry for Affairs Beyond the Borders of the Realm, the Realm of Cotland
Subject: Kahanistani aggression


Dear sir(s)/madam(s),

The Realm wishes to inform you that your protectorate and dependency, Kahanistan, has conducted an act of outright hostility towards the Realm after shooting down one of our strategic bombers that was returning home to base after a routine mission over international waters. The bomber, which was of the type B-22, accidentally strayed into Kahanistani airspace when the Kahanistanis engaged the bomber, taking absolutely no steps to try to warn the bomber that it had entered Kahanistani, or should I rather say Praetonian and/or Clandonian, airspace. The bomber was destroyed as a result of this cowardly act of aggression, and its aircrew is as of present unaccounted for.

It is the intention of the Realm to conduct punitive strikes against Kahanistan as punishment for this attack upon the sovereign property of the Realm, and we wish to inform our Praetonian and Clandonian friends so our actions are not misinterpreted as an act of war against your glorious nations. We will attempt our best to avoid civilian casualties, but we cannot guarantee this.

The Realm would also like to humbly request assistance from Praetonia and Clandonia to recover our missing aircrew. If they are alive, we fear that the Kahanistanis will conduct gross human rights violations against them in the form of torture and abuse, and we humbly ask that Praetonia and Clandonia help us return our aircrew to the Realm.

We thank you in advance for your non-interference on the side of Kahanistan and for your assistance in returning our missing aircrew to Cotland.

[signed]
Yngve Freiholt
Minister for Affairs Beyond the Borders of the Realm
Royal Ministry for Affairs Beyond the Borders of the Realm
The Realm of Cotland

The Cottish crew members' fears of being tortured by the evil Kahanistanians were completely unfounded. They were tracked within minutes by a special forces squad attached to a light infantry company. The soldiers the Cottish would spot did not have brains 40% smaller than their own, contrary to Doomani propaganda; their craniums appeared to be proportional in size to their bodies.

The soldiers carried FN FAL battle rifles (modified to fire the same 7.62x54mm round as their machine gun or sniper rifle, rather than the 7.62x51mm to simplify logistics), body armour and plenty of ammunition. A few carried PK machine guns; others used Dragunov sniper rifles. They approached the Cottish crew members, knowing they were likely armed. Kahanistanian soldiers appeared to be a mix of several races; the majority were Semitic - Arab or Jewish, but there were many whites and the occasional black, Asian, or Oriental among them. Men and women served in the same units, even in the special forces squad that was appearing over the mounds of ice and snow.

OOC: The aircrew bailed out over the sea, so unless your soldiers can walk on water, they can't see them....

[OOC: No, the plane landed in the sea. You didn't specify anything about the crew, so I took the liberty of assuming they would land on land where they could be picked up. But I'll go along with it this time.]

Military Intelligence Base

"What happened?" asked General Igor Kaselev, Director of Military Intelligence.

"Cottish plane was downed up north, near Fort Neptune," said the agent, a nondescript male colonel. "We also picked up a transmission to Praetonia and Clandonia, but it'll be ages before we can decrypt it. That's got to have 1024-bit encryption on it, it's nothing like we've encountered before."

"It can't be anything good," said Kaselev. "Probably grossly slanted - it's no secret they hate us, and they're allied with Praetonia. Spysat said there was no evidence of ordnance detonation... have the S.F.'s we sent out where they dropped those... bombs... contact me. I've a feeling it's not good."

The colonel's radio beeped. "Bodies? Any idea what they are?" A reply over the radio - a female officer.

"Well, they're the bodies that apparently were dropped by the bomber, we must have taken them for Cottish soldiers at first. When we got in close, they were bodies of people they must have dropped. Colonel Sharanski reckons he must have mistaken them for bombs when he gave the order to fire. May I speak to General Kaselev?"

"Kaselev here, Major. Any sign of the crew?"

"None as yet. There're some Su-30's looking around where it went down, to see if the crew might have jumped over water. If they did, they're dead - it's freezing. Hope they have warmth suits, the last thing we need is dead Cottish soldiers on our hands."

---

Over the downed plane, Su-30's flew around the wreck, tying into spy satellites and Naval Intelligence to locate the sailors before they froze to death. Special Forces continued tracking on land, using half-wolf, half-Great Dane giant canine beasts to assist them.

Some of the satellites the Kahanistanis have access to are Axis Novan in nature-- naturally, the economy of Kahanistan can't currently support much of a space program of it's own. Soon, radar, infrared, and high magnification optical scans begin to probe the sea in the area where the B-22 was last detected on radar...

The Allanean combat sattelites are many in nature, and at least some of them are watching over Kahanistan on constant basis. High-resolution images are picked up and streamed to the Kahanistani government. Very soon the Cotlandian men will be found – unless they're invisible, that is.

In a rather unexpected event, before even the 767 could take-off, one of the neonazis, a middle aged man with some wrinkles on his face simply answered to his palmtop and cellphone, and then started to talk to the others in the airport. The content of their conversation couldn't be listened, except for a few words which came out to locals ears, "nuclear", "invasion" and "unsafe". They simply embarked again, the 767 pilot announced his take-off and thus they left.

During the flight one of them quickly reminded about why they did such thing:

"The ANTIFA doesn't uses nuclear weapons nor lethal weapons"

Their return, if broadcast, could serve as motivation for those who came voluntarily rather than to escape from real persecution to return.

OOC-Just for clarification, Kstan, did you accept my criminals?

His Majesty's Office for the Protectorates
Official Statement & Protest

http://www.number10.gov.uk/files/images/Crest.jpg

News has reached His Majesty from a number of dependable sources, including His own, that an aircraft belonging to the Realm of Cotland did deliberately violate the territorial integrity of His Majesty's Protectorate of Kahanistan, drop a payload, the nature of which is yet to be determined, and subsequently flee the scene whereupon it was shot down by the Kahanistani military. This action took place without the agreement or knowledge of His Majesty, or any of His servants at home, in Kahanistan, or abroad, or those of His Royal Georgian League.

While His Majesty is not yet aware of the true intent or complete nature of this action, under no circumstance could the unauthorised breach of His guarantee of Protection in such a manner be countenanced. His Majesty lodges an Official Protest with the government of the Realm of Cotland, and requests and requires that any further military incursions upon his Realms not be undertaken without His prior consultation and approval.

His Majesty is aware, as the Cottish government has made Him aware, that the aircraft was shot down over international waters, having already completed its mission. This is not of immediate consequence. His Majesty asserts the absolute right of His own armed forces, and those of His protectorates, to take post-facto retaliatory action against any foreign party that would assault his Realms.

It is believed, however, that the Realm of Cotland did not act with malice or intent to cause harm to either the Crown Commonwealth or the United Kingdom of Clandonia, or indeed to the populace or property present in HM Protectorate of Kahanistan. Indeed, it is believed that the Realm of Cotland was not aware that its actions would provoke the response that they have, either from Kahanistan or from the Protectorate Powers. As such, His Majesty's Government is willing to extent a gift sum equivalent to the value of the lost aircraft as a token of continuing goodwill between the Crown Commonwealth and the Cottish Realm. The Cottish airmen, should they be picked up by His Majesty's forces, shall be returned to Cotland as soon as their health allows.

It is His Majesty's firm hope that the alliance between Praetonia and Cotland will be undiminished by this regrettable incident, and that the growing amicable relationship with Kahanistan will not likewise be imperilled.


Outside Kahanistani Waters

The patrol group closest to the last radar contact with the downed Cottish aircraft at once diverted its airborne helicopter contigent towards the likely site of the foreign airmen. It was hoped that with the reassurances presented, the airmen and their government would be more willing to assist a Praetonian rescue team in finding them than a potential hostile Kahanistani operation. As the search began to get underway in earnest, the escort carrier PWS Platypus and her attendant escorts added their own helicopters to the search effort.

Imperial Palace, Aiur
Conrad took a deep breath. He had just recieved word from his personal medical assisstants that his wife was pregnant again after 16 years. He was slightly confused, but it didn't matter. Another child was always welcomed. He stared down from the window in his office into the gardens, where he could see his daughter on the phone.

Talking to that Praetonian kid again? he thought. Behind him the door to his office opened. A minister walked in, from the Foreign Affairs Ministry under Pime Taradox. That guy was nuts.

"Sire, Pime Taradox says he isn't receiving any direct replies from the Kahanistani. He asks what we should do about the prisoners," the minster said.

"Bloody Kahanistani," Conrad replied,"Order the air force and prison officials to just get on with it. I have a barbeque to get to in Doomingsland and I can't right be arsed to deal with people with tiny brains at the moment. Find the most cost efficient way to get rid of the stupid bastards. I don't care if you have to airdrop them."

"Sir?" the minister looked slightly confused. Cottish pilots had recently been shot down flying over Kahanistan. Was the emperor looking for trouble?

"We don't need their permission now, do we? They're a protectorate of an ally," Conrad answered, adjusting his suit,"Besides, Kahanistan can't get any worse, can it?"

Later
Rows upon rows of transport planes, modified to carry the sheer number of prisoners that would be transported to Kahanistan, sat ready to fly. They had been filled to the brim. Even with the sheer number of them, it would take several runs to transport all of the prisoners. One and a half million men and women had been rounded up from prisons all across Zukariaa, and they were damn well happy to be going free, even if it was in a place perceived as a shithole.

Slowly but surely, the rows lifted off and directed themselves towards Kahanistan. As they approached the Kahanistani mainland, they sent in a message beforehand:

------
TO: Kahanistani Officials
FROM: Zukariaan Air Command
RE: Transport Planes

You have likely no doubt noticed that several hundred transport planes are moving towards your nation. Do not be distressed. We could not efficiently carry the number of prisoners we are bringing you in any other way. This is the most cost efficient way of dealing with the problem. Thank you.

END
-------

However, it was probably immediately clear to the Kahanistani officials that there was nowhere for so many transport planes to land. The transport planes quickly began to split into groups and fly over the areas outside of cities and at public parks, releasing their hatches and dropping thousands of men and women, the unwanted scum of Zukariaan society, onto the ground below them, several hundred metres. Those that survived would be Kahanistani.

When it was all said and done, the transport planes turned around the way they came. A single line was sent to the Kahanistani:

Sorry, we couldn't find a place to land.

Official Communiqué

The Realm acknowledges the Praetonian protest, and shall refrain from conducting any punitive military actions against the Crown Dependancy of Kahanistan, provided that they refrain from attacking peaceful Cottish aircraft or vessels in the future. We officially apologize for any inconveniences this incident may have had for the Crown Commonwealth of Praetonia.

[signed]
The Realm of Cotland

~60 kilometers N-NE off Fort Neptune, Northern Kahanistan

Fortunately, the bomber's crew had been prepared for the eventuality that they might be forced to bail out, and had worn a protective pilot drysuit over the G-suit, so they were cold, depressed but still alive, sitting in their orange inflatable survival rafts with the thin tarp and their protective drysuits being the only thing protecting them from the elements.

The pilot and the bombardier had managed to find each other again, and had tied each other’s rafts together so they wouldn’t drift from each other, no small feat with the pilot having broken his wrist in the bail-out, but the co-pilot was two kilometers further out to sea, also in his raft but with a busted leg.

When the pilot and bombardier saw the helicopter in the distance, the bombardier fired off an emergency flare, hoping that the helicopter would see it, and hoping that it would be a helicopter belonging to someone other than the Kahanistanis.

The co-pilot saw the flare in the distance too, and decided to launch one of his own flares in the hopes that he’d be found as well.

It was all up to the helicopter now.

Secret IC
Somewhere in the High Seas, very far from shore, in international waters
Two days later

The Cottish nuclear-powered submarine U-236 was at periscope depth, sending in one of its normal three daily status updates to High Command as per standard regulations when it received new orders.

The Tigerhai class nuclear attack submarine was ordered to belay the patrol activity it had been conducting for the past forty-six days and at once seek out one – and the message was very clear about that quantity – Kahanistani-flagged merchant vessel that operated on its own, without any military warships of any nationality save for the U-236 in the vicinity, and sink it using torpedoes. The order was highly classified and branded as a Special Operation, something which usually meant a intelligence-gathering mission or insertion of special forces, and which was always considered to be Top Secret and above, but didn’t specify any reasoning behind the orders.

The submarine’s crew didn’t know about the shoot-down of the Candrian two days ago and the small international incident it had caused, nor would they until they returned to their home port – the return voyage would last the better part of two weeks and was scheduled to begin in a few days. It didn’t matter though. The crew was well trained and disciplined, having been taught to carry out orders without questions or hesitation, and would do as ordered.

The Captain read through the order once again before handing the piece of paper over to the executive officer, who read it twice before looking up. The executive officer was young, this being his first tour as XO, but he knew his job. While the Captain headed for the SONAR room, the XO picked up the intercom and spoke.

“Action stations, action stations, action stations. Set condition one throughout the boat. This is not a drill. I repeat, action stations, action stations, action stations. Set condition one throughout the boat. This is not a drill.”

Red lights started flashing and the crew started running to their respective action stations, preparing the nuclear-powered submarine for battle against an unknown foe.

Meanwhile, the Captain entered the SONAR room.

“Any contacts?”

The senior SONAR man looked up.

“Three merchantmen at 3-4-1, 0-2-6 and 1-7-3, a pack of whales at 0-0-1, and that’s about it sir.”

“Do you have a nationality on the merchantmen?”

“No sir.”

“Very well. Let me know if the situation changes.” The Captain said before heading back to the CONN.

“Aye sir.” The SONAR man said to the Captain’s back as he left before returning to his job.

Three hours later, the U-236 had silently crept up on each of the three merchantmen, identifying them as one Questerian, one Zukariaan and one Brydogian through the photonic mast. None were Kahanistani though, so the U-236 did nothing. Instead, the submarine went deep and started heading for a known shipping route, hoping to find a Kahanistani vessel matching the specifics the orders dictated.

They’d play the game that submarines were experts in playing, stay concealed in the dark deep, just waiting for the unsuspecting prey to approach, wait for the situation to be just perfect… and then strike with unrelenting fury before slipping quietly away again, never having been detected.

The prey just had to arrive first.

~63 kilometers N-NE off Fort Neptune, Northern Kahanistan

The helicopter had had no luck. The crew had spent an hour traversing the grid search pattern assigned to it, but the poor weather conditions and early breakup of the aircraft meant they were searching for a very small target in a very large pool.

"Anything on IR?" The pilot shouted over the noise of the rotors. The helicopter was running low on fuel and would soon have to return to the Platypus.

"No, sir." He had not seen the faint body heat of the highly insulated airmen some miles distant.

"Right," the pilot hadn't expected anything else after so much fruitless searching. "A few more minutes max, in that case. No point losing an aircraft for the poor sods."

Suddenly the sky lit up. "Sir!" The IR operator stopped himself, realising that everyone else would have seen it too.

The helicopter lurched to one side, and half an hour later the Cottish aircrew were wrapped up in blankets on their way to the Praetonian carrier.

"Lucky escape, eh chaps?" A medical officer remarked, handing the Cottish commander a boiling hot cup of tea. "You wouldn't be getting a reception like this in Kahaniland. God only knows why you were sent out there."

[OOC: Zukariaa, crooks accepted.]

The Zukariaans had the sense to use transport planes rather than strategic bombers, and thus, when they dropped their "cargo", they were not mistaken as dropping bombs, and were not fired upon.

After the first few drops of civilians (without parachutes!), the National Police, local fire departments, and Civil Defence units rushed to wide open fields that were likely to receive large numbers of drops and cast fire nets out. As many of these fire nets dated back to before the First Doomani War, or were built to the same specifications as such, they were designed for catching people from the tallest skyscrapers Kahanistan had while based in the tiny Negev. It wasn't much, but it was all they could do.

Even so, the greatest bulk of survivors would be those who fell in trees that broke their falls, or in mud flats, rivers, or oceans. The Air Force was put on standby for the return of the Zukariaans (or anyone else who decided to get cute with processing emigrants) to escort them to New Masada International Airport. Two hundred Su-30 MKI's took off to manage this massive escort operation.

All in all, about 60,000 survivors were picked up the first day.

---

The Air Force did not attempt to interfere with the Praetonian search. However, they did comb the seas looking for any crew members the Praetonians may have missed, with ASW helicopters from warships in the area (and the warships themselves, when they were near an area being searched.) In a raft, if the Praetonians had not gotten the copilot some distance from his comrades, he could be rescued by a Kahanistanian ship.

OOC-To clarify, I did all 1.5 million in one drop. Thats why I made it clear that they wouldn't be able to land. Because there were so many planes used to transport that many people.

Ridiculous, I know! XD

Praetonian SAR helicopter

The pilot accepted the cup of warm liquid with a smile and a nod, holding it with his good hand to try to get some warmth into his frozen body. Five hours sitting in that cold water was more than enough, he decided. He had started accepting that he would probably die out there, lost on the high seas, far from the Fatherland and his family when the helicopter appeared like a speck of light in an increasingly darker tunnel. It wasn't until he spotted the Praetonian markings on the helicopter that the light became stronger and he realized that he was saved from the death of exposure. His entire crew was alive as well. Battered, but alive. He sipped the warm tea.

"Indeed he do." The pilot replied in accented English, not revealing a word about their mission or anything related to it. While the Praetonians were allies, there were some things they'd be better off not knowing. Especially when it concerned their protectorate.

"Thank you for saving me and my crew. Thank you." The pilot said to the medical officer.

U-236, on the High Seas
Top Secret IC

The U-236 had made it to the shipping lane unnoticed, and was at two hundred fifty meters, with the reactor output at just enough to let the pumpjet propulsor keep them at five knots, enough for the submarine to maintain the depth and manouvering capabilities, using its very sensitive passive SONAR arrays to listen for any contacts.

After five hours on station, a contact was detected on the surface, moving at a leisurly 14 knots in the general direction of Kahanistan. No other contacts were detected in the vicinity of the contact, which was desigated Foxtrot 66, meaning that it was the 66th potentially hostile contact the submarine had detected on SONAR since its patrol started.

With some hope, the Captain ordered the submarine to alter course, go deep to avoid the risk of cavitation, and sneak up on the contact, letting it pass them so he could come up behind it and take a peek and identify it.

Forty minutes later, the U-236 had made an agonizingly slow manouver which had positioned it two kilometers behind the contact, which was the only contact on SONAR. Pleased, the Captain decided to slowly rise to periscope depth - the Tigerhai class submarines were equipped with photonic masts instead of periscopes, but the name lingered - and identify the vessel.

Five minutes later, the submarine had risen to the periscope depth slowly as to let the hull gradually adjust to the decreasing pressure, thus preventing the hull from making any sounds that might let anyone listening on a SONAR know that there was a submarine here. The crew were all at action stations, ready and hoping that this would be their prey. Word had been passed of their mission and that it was very secret - no person without a high security clearance was allowed to serve on a Cottish submarine - so they all knew what was to be done if this was a good contact.

In the control room, the Captain waited until the boat had levelled off at periscope depth and stabilized itself before he ordered the ESM mast to be raised. This thin fragile-looking mast was very difficult to detect from a boat twenty meters away, and would be impossible to be detected from an aircraft or a vessel several kilometers away.

On the surface, the sea was rough and the skies cloudy, signs that the storm which had been predicted in this area was arriving quickly. In other words, it would be the perfect time to strike. Better still, the ESM antenna showed no signs of any aircraft or military-grade radars in the area.

Pleased, the Captain ordered the ESM mast lowered and the photonic mast raised.

The mast broke through the water and was raised almost a meter before the petty officer in charge of raising the masts stopped the hydraulics, letting the Captain rotate the mast one full 360° rotation to make sure there were no undetected surface contacts - there weren't - before he positioned the mast on the bearing of the surface contact and zoomed in. The XO, weapons officer, navigator and several others in the control room crew watched the LCD screen that showed the live feed from the photonics mast while the Captain had his eyes in the mast's seeker.

The vessel was immediately identified as a bulk carrier, estimated to be in the Handysize and weighing somewhere between 20 000 and 30 000 dead weight tonnes. The Captain zoomed in a little more on the bulk carrier before he smiled. Foxtrot 66 was positively identified as the Star of New Masada, and flew the Kahanistani flag from its mast.

"Fire solution?"

The plotting crew at the powerful fire control computer punched in the updated figures, giving the computer the data it needed to calculate a good firing solution for the U-236's torpedoes. After a few seconds, the weapons officer looked up.

"Ready. Recommend two torpedoes, firing order three, one. The fish will move quiet before we bring them up a few hundred meters from the target and arm them."

"Prepare to fire." The Captain said before taking the intercom down from its cradle. He spoke softly, "This is the Captain. We have made positive contact with an enemy target. It is my intention to engage the target with two torpedoes. Prepare to fire. God save the King and the Fatherland."

Throughout the submarine, the one hundred ten man strong crew heard the quiet message and did their utmost, making sure everything was perfect for the submarine to do what it was made to do - hunt and kill.

"Torpedo tubes three and one prepared and ready in all respects sir." The weapons officer said, having gotten confirmation from the torpedo compartment in the bow of the submarine that the readouts on the display were true.

"Fire tube three." The Captain said, waiting a few seconds as the U-236 launched the first of two torpedoes, After the submarine vibrated slightly as the torpedo was forced out of the 533mm wide torpedo tube by pressurized air, the weapons officer said, "Torpedo tube three fired electrically. Fish running straight and normal."

"Fire tube one."

Again, the submarine vibrated slightly as another torpedo tube was emptied of its deadly payload by pressurized air.

"Torpedo tube one fired electrically. Fish running straight and normal."

Outside the submarine which was at periscope depth three thousand five hundred meters away, the two Mekugi-made Mk.70 Swordfish IIIA torpedoes moved relatively quietly at 70 meters, too deep to be spotted from the surface with the naked eye, heading for Foxtrot 66 at 45 knots.

Five hundred meters out, the torpedoes received new instructions from the wires attaching them to U-236, increasing speed to 75 knots and starting to rise, arming their 350 kilogram high-explosive warheads as they came directly underneath the merchant vessel.

The two torpedoes detonated 10 meters underneath the Star of New Masada's keel, creating a vaccume in the water that forced the surrounding water to rush in to fill the vaccume. It was this extremely powerful force of nature that would pull the water around the bulk carrier's hull down and break the keel of the bulk carrier clean in half. Not even the most heavily armed warship could withstand this force of nature. Nothing could save the ship and its cargo now.

From the surface, the only thing that could be seen was a bright white flash as the torpedoes detonated.

The U-236's SONAR computer recorded the sinking on the digital harddrives. The same thing was being done with the footage from the photonics mast. In the control room, the crew cheered as they saw their target split in half and begin to sink. Their hard work had paid off. The submarine had achieved its mission and sunk a Kahanistani merchant vessel without being detected, completing a mission that would remain classified for at least one hundred years. The Cottish had plausible deniability, as no one could prove that Cotland had anything to do with things. As far as the world was concerned, the Realm didn't even maintain any patrols in this area of the world.

Back at the Star of New Masada, all its crew could hope for was that there were someone in the vicinity that would come along and pick them up.

While Kahanistanian merchant ships did carry light armament - usually including one or two torpedo tubes, four cold-launch VLS cells, a 100mm DP gun, and a 155mm cannon, and even radar and sonar, detecting a stealth sub was out of the question. The KMI Mk.32 eight-barreled 40mm ETC Gatling cannon, while a formidable weapon against missiles or suicide boats, was useless against torpedoes - it couldn't exactly aim down, and even if it could, it'd just rip up the deck and cap some poor sucker on the lower deck.

Ships rarely travelled alone (partially out of paranoid fears of places like the Bermuda Triangle, partially out of fear of pirates) so the Star of New Masada sailed confidently through the sea until a giant BOOM! shook the deck. The vessel had a compartmentalised lower deck, like that of the Titanic which was theoretically supposed to make it unsinkable, but the Titanic wasn't made to resist supercavitating torpedoes, and neither was the Star of New Masada half its size. The neighbouring ships fled, unable to engage the sub and not willing to add to the casualty count. The captain issued a general distress call, and in accordance with safety codes, the ship had inflatable rafts on the top deck and life jackets for the crew.

However, the vessel sank so rapidly that a fifth of the crew did not have time to get to the top deck. While the inflatable rafts on the top would have floated even if the ship sank, that wouldn't help the crew trapped below decks who couldn't get to the top. Going out the torpedo hole was a no-go, too - the ship was sinking faster than the crew members could swim around it. On top of that, even in cold water one could only survive an hour without oxygen, and the nearest Kahanistanian warship, the cruiser RKS Hannibal, was three hours away.

U-236
Top Secret IC

Pleased with the confirmed sinking, the U-236 lowered its photonic mast and dove to four hundred meters while slipping out of the area as quietly and undetected as she had entered the area, leaving no proof that she had ever been there.

The mission was a complete success and the Realm had gotten its revenge for the Kahanistani shoot-down of the B-22 a few days ago, albeit without anyone knowing. The Kahanistanis couldn't prove that the Cottish had any involvement in the sinking, nor would the Realm ever acknowledge any responsibility or involvement in it.

In a few weeks, U-236 would return to its berth in the submarine pen outside Bergen and begin its normal maintenance period, and her crew would be given much-deserved leave after a small and secret ceremony where they were awarded medals for their successful mission - if anyone asked they had been awarded the medals for faithfully carrying out a successful patrol in the Defense of the King and Fatherland - and a strickt reminder that the mission had been a secret and that any revelation of it to outsiders equalled a meeting with the executioner at the chopping block.

No one would speak a single word about the Special Operation, and the world would be none the wiser for what had happened.

General Igor Kaselev, Director of Military Intelligence, knew full well who it was that had torpedoed the Star of New Masada. Who else had a motive? The Doomani? They would have machine-gunned the lifeboats and crucified the survivors. The Praetonians? Yeah, right, and piss off Kahanistan when they were trying to form an amicable relationship. No, it was the people they'd pissed off earlier for shooting down their plane.

Kaselev didn't need proof that the Cottish were behind it for the same reason George W. Bush didn't need proof that Saddam Hussein had WMD. He wasn't going to wipe his feet on the Treaty of Haversham over it, though. Praetonia wouldn't take too well to the idea of one of its protectorates and one of its allies fighting each other, and they'd intervene - not in Kahanistan's favour.

When the RKS Hannibal arrived, it scanned the area under the water with its sonar so nothing took it by surprise as lifeboats came up to it to be pulled aboard. To be absolutely sure, it fired a torpedo - while it couldn't detect anything under there, maybe its torpedo's sonar could. Anybody poking their noses around there was probably up to no good, anyway. It wasn't like civilians commonly used subs. The torp probably wouldn't hit anything, but it couldn't hurt - unless you were a whale or a dolphin.

Fortunately for the U-236, it had vacated the area two hours before KNS Hannibal even entered the area, and had been sailing for home at 18 knots - well below the tactical silent speed of 25 knots - when the Kahanistani warship fired the torpedo. The Kahanistanis might very well suspect that Cotland was behind it, but they had absolutely no proof nor ability to act on their suspicions.

Meanwhile, the Cottish prepared the next shipment of undesirables. It had been decided to return to the use of the Kondor, albeit with fighter escort this time to make sure the Kahanistanis didn't try something stupid again, and with due warning in advance this time.


To: The Praetonian Dependency of Kahanistan
From: The Realm of Cotland
Subject: Shipment of Undesirables

After long and careful consideration, the Realm has decided to resume the shipment of undesirables to Kahanistan using transport aircraft. This communiqué is sent to give due warning that we will be arriving with undesirables, and that the transport aircraft will be escorted by Cottish fighters as a precaution against further Kahanistani stupidity involving loose trigger fingers.

Official Statement of the Free Republic of Kahanistan

The Government of Kahanistan has no objection to the use of transport aircraft to transport emigrants. They are less likely than your bomber to be mistaken for dropping bombs. I see no similar shooting incidents as long as you do not intentionally drop diseased prisoners into our territory.

When your aircraft enter our airspace, they will be escorted to New Masada International Airport by our fighters. Should they drop the citizens before landing, we will force down the offending plane to arrest the crew for this crime.

Signed,
Nadia Sklenova,
President of Kahanistan

---

President Sklenova sat with her head in her hands. How did an outreach programme to increase the population and improve diplomatic relations with the world end in a conflict with Cotland? They'd never interacted before, why the hostility now? She needed a drink.

To: The Praetonian Depedency of Kahanistan
From: The Realm of Cotland
Subject: Re: Re: Shipment of Undesirables

While the Realm does not necessarily have any plans for delivering the undesirables in the particular manner which you have described, it is our principle that we shall consider any attempt of forcing any Cottish transport aircraft down to be an illegal act of war against the Realm and be dealt with accordingly.

Given Kahanistan's history of unprovoked violence, we cannot with good concience send our transports to Kahanistan if they are under the threat of being shot down. Therefore, we urge Kahanistan to think before they act. If they cannot, we urge their Praetonian overlords to intervene and ensure that Kahanistan cannot conduct any more stupidity.

Should these terms be unacceptable to Kahanistan, we will have no other choice than to execute the undesirables ourselves. The choice is yours: Refrain from conducting any acts of war against the Realm, or be responsible for having nearly five thousand people executed.
.

President Sklenova examined the document. She wasn't going to sit back and let five thousand people be executed. She was no nationalist (communism and nationalism didn't go well together - one held that all were equal and the other placed the nation first), but the nationalists in the Senate had been making noise about the Cottish demeanour toward her and the way they addressed her nation. Sklenova was under pressure to at least say something about that, too.

Official Statement of the Free Republic of Kahanistan

We are not a Praetonian dependency. We are protected by Praetonia under the condition that we refrain from provoking war against our nation and threatening Praetonian interests herein; we make our own laws and have our own culture that is radically different from that of Praetonia.

Back on topic, we suggest delivery by ship. This would prevent a repeat of your airdrop into shark-infested waters, and you would be allowed passage into any port of the Free Republic to deliver the emigrants.

If this is unacceptable for some reason, deliver by air at our international airport in New Masada. Should an incident occur, we find it highly unlikely that the Praetonians would countenance war breaking out over the arrest of murderers on our soil.

Signed,
Nadia Sklenova,
President of Kahanistan

Bring
Up
My
Post

Bring
Up
My
Post

To: The Praetonian Dependency of Kahanistan
From: The Realm of Cotland
Subject: Re: Re: Re: Re: Shipment of Undesirables


The Realm finds it highly amusing to read that Kahanistan believes that it can survive in the arena of international affairs without Praetonia holding Her protective hand over you. Have you forgotten that while you ran the show by yourselves, you managed to subject your state to not just one, but several devestating and completely unnecessary self-inflicted defeats. We would have thought that the devestating loss of Nuclearum and the bulk of the Kahanistani sub-species of mankind would have given away the hint that you are incapable of managing your own state independently. Hence, we remain firm in our right to refer to your petty area of land as what it is: A dependency of the Praetonian Crown. Now let's move on, shall we?

After careful consideration, His Most Gracious Majesty have decided to show leniency towards Kahanistan and continue the shipments of undesirables to Kahanistan. However, we will not be dictated by a mere province incapable of self-governance in how we conduct our affairs. We may have shown you leniancy this time, but rest assured. Should any further harm or attempts of hindering come to His Majesty's Aircraft or any of His Subjects, not even Praetonia can shield your petty dependancy from the justified wrath of the Realm. You have been duly warned.

The shipments continued.

This time, a flight of four Kondors were heading for Kahanistan, packed with two hundred undesirables, all of them sedated prior to departure in order to keep them from causing any trouble. This particular batch of eight hundred and one were all males and females in their thirties and forties, and in relatively good health. That was, just until they were about to be shipped out. Military scientists had quietly injected them all with a experimental chemical warfare agent that wasn't lethal, but which in previous tests had rendered the test subjects 75 % disabled a week after the injection had been given. The warfare agent lay dormant for 72 hours before it struck, causing great pains for the victim in the bones, joints, heart, kidneys, lungs and skin. It was, essentially, a severe form of rheumatism that was inflicted on them. There was no cure known to man that could cure the criminals.

The Kondors had no intention of landing in Kahanistan. So, as they flew over Kahanistani land, they opened their rear cargo doors and initiated a steep climb, letting gravity take care of making the sleeping undesirables fall out. Once they were out, the Kondors high-tailed it out of Kahanistani aerospace and back towards Cotland.

The Cottish had done something interesting this time around. Three and three were tied together with plastic zip-ties, and one were given a parachute. The idea was that the people would fall to the ground more or less alive, assuming of course the weight didn't become excessive and make the parachute collapse. That way, both sides would be happy. The Cottish got to unload their undesirables on the Kahanistanis without having to actually land there, while the Kahanistanis got the undesirables. It was a win-win situation.

Unfortunately, the Cottish had used surplus 1950's vintage parachutes that were designed for one man, admittedly in full combat gear, but still. So, about one in five parachutes failed and the three sleeping men and women in that particular parachute initiated a one thousand meter freefall that often culminated in them becoming little more than a red sticky goo splattered out on the ground where they impacted the ground.

There were one hundred and sixty-two such fatalities.

The rest hit the ground hard and suffered minor injuries, such as scrubs and broken limbs, but generally speaking, they were okay. That was, until about fifty hours after they had landed when they started complaining about pains. Of course, Cotland would deny any knowledge.

The Cottish planes were escorted by Su-30 fighters, each loaded with twelve AAM's, as soon as they appeared on the AWACS' radar. The commander of the fighter wing of 100 planes, Brigadier General Zahar Khalid, ordered the Kondors to land at New Masada International Airport.

Unfortunately, he was constrained by orders from the Air Force Chief of Staff prohibiting him from using deadly force unless the Cottish fired first - they didn't need a repeat of the bomber incident. As such, he was unable to enforce his order as well as he would have liked.

After that fiasco, President Sklenova wanted to ban Cottish planes from entering Kahanistan's airspace. Defence Minister Lavalle opposed her, saying that the prisoners would all be executed otherwise and a national insult was not worth killing millions over. While the President was willing to ask for Praetonian diplomatic assistance, the Nationalists in the cabinet didn't want to ask any favours from them lest the Cottish think they were in the right.

Typical male masculinity. The President decided to request Praetonian assistance in secret. If the Nationalists or the rest of the cabinet had a problem with it, they could raise their own stink with the Cottish - she knew Karovic well enough to know that he would, and he probably wouldn't hold her discussions against her.

Encryption Code Xi-5-Upsilon-3-Psi

On behalf of the Government of Kahanistan, I request the assistance of the Praetonian Government in a diplomatic dispute with Cotland.

The Cottish insist on airdropping their emigrants in faulty or no parachutes, in areas that make likely a significant delay before they can be tested for diseases or chemical weapons. In defiance of our Air Force, they have conducted this airdrop in full view of one hundred of our fighters, and were spared in the interests of maintaining peace.

We request permission to use greater force to ensure that our laws with regard to immigration are followed. We have no problem with Cottish immigration; our problem is with our ability to examine for diseases being intentionally circumvented while their government thumbs its nose at our sovereign airspace.

We also ask that the Praetonian Government assist us in importing larger numbers of these Cottish emigrants; we will set up an immigration station at a designated port, but its usefulness will depend on if the refugees actually go through it.

Signed,
Nadia Sklenova,
President of Kahanistan

Office of the Protectorates Communique to Kahanistan

President Sklenova,

While the situation you are faced with is bizarre to say the least, under the terms of Protectorate this civilian matter is not something His Majesty is able to take direct action to prevent. His Majesty will implore the Cottish authorities to reconsider their somewhat unorthadox population control and penal policies, but despite close diplomatic relations His Majesty has no power to force the matter on the Cottish side either.

It should be noted, however, that His Majesty has not and does not object to Kahanistan using reasonable force to ensure that her laws are respected within her own borders or to defend them from outward assault. His Majesty has full confidence in the authorities of Kahanistan to deal with this civil manner on their own without the need for outside intervention. If, however, you continue to experience problems with unlicensed aircraft flying within your borders, the commander of the Praetonian sovereign base in Kahanistan has been instructed to assist your authorities as instructed.

God Save the King.

[OOC: This is Prae, forgot to log out of my Haven Balkans puppet.