Java Blacks Madness
07-02-2008, 13:53
I'm pleased to announce that Java Black University, the primary university of The Democratic Republic of Java Black's Madness, has begun a new training program for national governments whose own nations lack the means to effective human resource training.
JBU is a thriving public-run university that is coming across a big problem: We are graduating far more Ph.D students than government positions! Our education is actually outpacing the growth of our government! The result has been a creation of various new teaching positions. And the surplus of professors in popular fields has led us to expand into the philosophy of courses we don't even have a use for!
These include human resource management courses for totalitarian governments, propaganda studies, capitalist economics, and effective interventionist militarism training! Our people have no interest beyond academia for these things... and this creates a demand for international students!
Make your government staff more effective and for a good price! Plus your stressed-out public employees will have a chance to relax while studying on a beautiful tropical island with lapse drug laws!
We also have programs for business leaders.
And do you need somewhere to dispose of left-leaning political opponents, but don't think you can get away with killing them? Look no further. Send them to study here and just leave them. We're sure to have a position for them in the Department of International Dealings!
So when you think "Wow, I'm surrounded by incompetence", think JBU!
We undo incompetence!
-Jack F. Kattlehand
President
Java Black University
The Democratic Republic of Java Black
JBU is a thriving public-run university that is coming across a big problem: We are graduating far more Ph.D students than government positions! Our education is actually outpacing the growth of our government! The result has been a creation of various new teaching positions. And the surplus of professors in popular fields has led us to expand into the philosophy of courses we don't even have a use for!
These include human resource management courses for totalitarian governments, propaganda studies, capitalist economics, and effective interventionist militarism training! Our people have no interest beyond academia for these things... and this creates a demand for international students!
Make your government staff more effective and for a good price! Plus your stressed-out public employees will have a chance to relax while studying on a beautiful tropical island with lapse drug laws!
We also have programs for business leaders.
And do you need somewhere to dispose of left-leaning political opponents, but don't think you can get away with killing them? Look no further. Send them to study here and just leave them. We're sure to have a position for them in the Department of International Dealings!
So when you think "Wow, I'm surrounded by incompetence", think JBU!
We undo incompetence!
-Jack F. Kattlehand
President
Java Black University
The Democratic Republic of Java Black