NationStates Jolt Archive

The title is, surprisingly, true - I want a nation to blast the everloving shit out of parts of my little country. I'm not particularly fussy about how you do it either; if you've got some tactical nukes taking up space in a warehouse somewhere, I'll be happy to accommodate one them upside the head. Undoubtedly, this sounds like an odd thing to ask, so I'll elaborate. As some of you may have noticed from the absence of warmongering, weight being thrown about and excessive cursing, I've been away from these parts for about six months, and in my mind, in that time the clean, efficient dictatorship has metamorphosed into a disgusting democracy, and I believe it's time for things to change.

Hence the question. I figure getting attacked for some reason is the perfect catalyst that would spark off some riots, some police intervention, possibly a couple of public executions of prominent members within the government, who knows where the night might take us? I don't know, that's why I'm asking. So, who wants to do the honours?

OOC:

Ummm...I'd be happy to...blast you to oblivion, provided there was a believable reason for me to be attacking.

~ Romandeos

Well, that's completely up to you to devise. If there's anything you want to know about us, ask and I'll provide.

Well, that's completely up to you to devise. If there's anything you want to know about us, ask and I'll provide.

Here's an idea. Maybe some forces within your country deliberately set up a military conflict between us, the goal being to de-stabilize things enough that it will be possible to set up a dictatorship again.

For questions, just one. Do you have any appreciable coastline? I like bombarding things with big guns.

EDIT: I have the perfect scenario now. Do you have MSN, or should I just send you a telegram?

Telegram. In fact, I'll send you one first, you may want a map to work with.

That probably wouldn't work, we don't HAVE arable land. About 30% of the land is arctic in climate, and the rest is both cold and wet. We import just about all of our food. Also, HOLY SHIT TIMEWARP~

I could use an excuse to test my new salt-the-earth principle heavy ICBM system. If I could find a good reason to be doing it.

In effect what the system does is, rather then nuke cities, I carpet nuke your arable land. Leaving your cities ripe with people who now have no food, land to farm food from, and so on. Riots should ensue with starvation.

I could use an excuse to test my new salt-the-earth principle heavy ICBM system. If I could find a good reason to be doing it.

In effect what the system does is, rather then nuke cities, I carpet nuke your arable land. Leaving your cities ripe with people who now have no food, land to farm food from, and so on. Riots should ensue with starvation.

Good idea. My idea was to launch an invasion, and take one of his cities as a Imperial Colony to help pay my war-time expenses. The factions in his country desiring a dictatorship could use the discontent generated by this and make a grab at the reins.

Yeah, I'd get involved, but with the demilitarization Golugan's attacks tend to consist of political assassination, police force 'relief aid' when chaos breaks out, and the establishment of Golugani monopolies within the target nation until the place becomes a colony of the Empire.

I'd need a reason. Although it would not take much in some ways. Considering I have a very feminist national leader, and soon to be an ultra-feminist one comming into power, it's fairly easy to see where things can get heated there.
Plus the threat of nuclear attack on Sumer by one of those factions who profess to be of the land or something, excellent reason.

I suppose the best reason for my nation to invade would be standard terorrist provocation.

"My ship was just attacked by somebody from YOUR country. I demand justice! Hand the attackers over, now! No? Very well, then. Perish!"

dictatorship-paid assassinDibs.

Seriously? Honestly, I think just having a female leader would work - we piss her off, she bombs the fuck out of a city or two, the government gets kicked out on its arse and maybe, at some point in the future, a dictatorship-paid assassin ventilates Little Miss President's face. When I wake up, I'll start writing the lovingly-crafted memo informing everyone to steer clear of...er, whatever her name is at official state gatherings because she's got the painters in.

DL wins, eh? Ah well, I have a female leader, too, but she's not a raging feminist so much as she's hot-headed. Hey, at least I can still watch the festivities.

'Fraid so. I do have a soft spot for causing wars over gender issues.

Also, dibs recognised.

So you're going to have a female president, and kill her just to spark me to bomb the shit out of you?
I like it.
Make her a strong women's rights activist, and have that the public reason she dies. That'll really piss my leader off.

'Fraid so. I do have a soft spot for causing wars over gender issues.

...Sexist pig.

No, seriously, that's actually a solid, realistic concept. Have fun. And if you're in need of an RP buddy some time in the future, just let me know.

Might not be a bad idea to have both of us involved. As I won't make it a dedicated war, simply a smack-down of some "Silly terrorist boys who need to stop thinking like pigs". If instability is nessecary anywhere else, I'm not going to do much more then bomb some farmland, some industry, and generally make the nation unable to sustain itself. Thus happily pissed off people easily manipulated by el Dictator.

So you're going to have a female president, and kill her just to spark me to bomb the shit out of you?
I like it.
Make her a strong women's rights activist, and have that the public reason she dies. That'll really piss my leader off.

I...was originally intending your female leader to be the target of some public derision, but fuck if that isn't funnier. On second thoughts, I wouldn't be able to do that and rationalise us being a democracy at the same time (I'm also far better at writing anti-female rhetoric than I am at anything else). I'm going to the original plan, plus it works better from my perspective because the new leader can justify the actions as being to protect our nation rather than anything else.

...Sexist pig.

Guilty as charged.

I suppose the best reason for my nation to invade would be standard terorrist provocation.

"My ship was just attacked by somebody from YOUR country. I demand justice! Hand the attackers over, now! No? Very well, then. Perish!"

I would like to join in along those lines as well, perhaps forging a coalition of sorts? Also, my nation hasn't had a full-out war for a couple of yrs, so this sounds like fun. I also want to know, is this MT or FT or what?

Well my current dictator will die in a little while anyway, but that's highly scripted already.

So between now and then, I'd hapily go with this. Plus it sets precident for future IC issues that I like.

I assume this is MT. Is it too late to join in? Perferably as a financial backer of somesorts?

I...was originally intending your female leader to be the target of some public derision, but fuck if that isn't funnier. On second thoughts, I wouldn't be able to do that and rationalise us being a democracy at the same time (I'm also far better at writing anti-female rhetoric than I am at anything else).Perhaps the female rights thing is the silver lining to a brutal and inept regime?

FUS, stop right there. This isn't intended to be a war of any description, and there's definitely not going to be any coalitionining, it's just a strike against an insulting nation intended as being...whatever it is, I would guess just some sort of warning. Better to ask Dostuganoinfsodijfo-I can't spell that name, let's call him That Guy; better to ask That Guy what their motivation is likely to be.

In fact, let's forget all of this for now. Once I post the thread, we can get things going properly.

Uiri, no financial backers either. No point.

Uiri, no financial backers either. No point.

Oh, I was just trying to weasel my way into this. Since this isn't going to be a war I'm not sure if I can.

Well set up what you can. I suspect you want something short and IC to justify the change to dictatorship. A little IC banter back and forth, insults, ultra-hard smackdown of your nation. Let your government change as you wish then?

I forget how to spell this account name too sometimes. Just say Sumer, it's what I RP as.

I need to test out some tac nukes and strategic bombers and shit of the like. I can devise my reason as "fun" for my sadistic Imperial Council...I'm assuming that's ok?

If so, I'm in. Nothing like buttraping little pieces of land.

If you like, I can send in a few bomber squads and randomly drop some incendiaries on some majorly populated parts of your larger cities. That should stir up a good riot. Then when the mobs get a leader, I'll have one of my men snipe him/her :sniper:, while dressed in government gear. Then you should have a full scale revolution on your hands, and you can take over the rebellion.

Your friend and fellow dictator,
Vladimir Jordonivich

OK, change of plans.

Since there seem to be plenty of takers, there's a perfectly fine way to accommodate you all. Laws over here are ridiculously strict in places, and so if anybody wants to drop some bombs on us, do it as a reaction to the very nasty (think BL blending) public execution of an alcohol dealer. However, since there are already too many nations interested in getting a piece of us, no more. If Uiri wants to remain a financial backer, they can back the Tolstonian efforts.

Darn it...

And I just recieved permission from Antigr to invade you in his place...
Mostly to keep you from harbouring terrorists...

But the entire gender specificly sexist genocide thing helps...
-----
Eh, I already lost interest...

Can I just let some randomly big thing land someplace random in your country?
It may kill a few sheep...

Darn it...

And I just recieved permission from Antigr to invade you in his place...
Mostly to keep you from harbouring terrorists...

But the entire gender specificly sexist genocide thing helps...
-----
Eh, I already lost interest...

Can I just let some randomly big thing land someplace random in your country?
It may kill a few sheep...

...the words make sense, but strung together like that has just resulted in gibberish.

1) Antigr was (is) a moron. If you were going to invade in his place, I'd have to treat you the same as him and erect a giant fuck-off anti-Antigr force-field.
2) Terrorists?
3) Sexist genocide?
4) No.

Can I somehow sign up, perhaps as vengeance for your officials assaulting my citizens during Good Business Day?

How about we all just play it by ear for now? The roleplay thread is up, but there isn't much scope for you to join at the moment. (http://forums.jolt.co.uk/showthread.php?p=13413403#post13413403) Things should start grinding into motion after I write up the interrogation and execution, which should themselves be faster because it involves gribbly things happening to charcters.