NationStates Jolt Archive

OOC: TG for entrance is now null and void, waiting for los moderadors to respond to my request. D:<

Ah yes, Christmas time in Cohenia. Victory Square is decorated for the holidays; with a big, ornate tree decorated with lit-up skulls, lights, stars, and whatnot. The fresh snow over the tree made it even more of a site to see, it was marvelous indeed. Everyone (save the coalminers) was in a delightful mood - everyone was happy. Stores were open and raking in the profits of shoppers buying gifts for their loved ones. Women and men alike walked the streets of Stuyvesant, Hamilton, and Knox carrying large shopping bags from Elizabeth's Undercover, Stacy's, Proletarians Plus, Radio Hut, Ceil-Store, R.C. Nickel, PowerfulPurchase, Technology Town, the Clandonian Store, and much more. The Elizabeth's Undercover Winter Fashion Show was advertised in Knox's Polk Square, something a tad risque for the conservative town. The women were showing skin! Everyone was shopping in Cohenia, everyone. There was money to be spent, and bonuses to be spent too. There were gifts to be sent as well, how can one forget about that? Cohenians with ConEx were sending gifts to relatives in Franberry, Zukariaa, Rosbaningrad, all over.

One celebrating such a merry Christmas was our hero, Emperor Ferrin. Ferrin was sad though, his children were away at college and his wife was with her family in Hamptonshire. What could the Emperor do? Simply put, the Emperor would make a lavish party for all of his chums to frequent! The alcohol was purchased and brewed, the beef was purchased and ready to be cooked, the tree was cut from the most grand tree in the entire nation and brought to the Palace, to be decorated by the Emperor's very own serfs. To top it all off, twenty-five hundred forty-pound turkeys roasted in the numerous ovens across the palace. Millions of gallons of gravy boiled on stovetops as oilbarrels filled with alcohol were moved into the grand ballroom of the Palace. The Emperor smirked at the lavishness of the party.

TO: MY COMRADES ACROSS THE WORLD
From: Emperor Aaron Ferrin Stuyvesant

Hello, my comrades!

As you may or may not be aware, Christmas time is here! As always, I will be hosting my semi-annual Christmas party in the capital of my empire, Stuyvesant. All* (http://youtube.com/watch?v=oHg5SJYRHA0) are invited! I hope you can attend. It will be formal attire for the party, yet don't think it will not be a party! We will have a limbo party, pin-the-tail-on-the-Clandonian, and the greatest award of all. If you can play the special version of Guitar God (only for Jimtendo Mìì) and complete the Cohenian National Anthem on 'God' mode, you will get one hundred googolplex Party Pesos!! Party Pesos are usable in the nation of Franberry as legal tender as well! Come one, come all to the Cohenian Christmas Party - all leaders are allowed in* (http://youtube.com/watch?v=oHg5SJYRHA0)! Prizes will be awarded, too!

Thanks,

Ferrin I of Cohenia
Emperor of the Cohenias, Duke of Rosbaningrad, Annexor of Estonsko, High Priest of the Holy Lands, the Father of your Daughters

FAQs
"Wait a minute...," you may be asking, "isn't the Imperium of Cohenia a mainly Jewish nation?!"

Yes, that is true.

"Then why are you celebrating Christmas?"

As you may or may not be aware, Cohenian Jews enjoy money and free presents. Over the years of our existance, we noticed the joy of the goyem throughout the world during this year and wanted it for ourselves. To make the holiday of Christmas Jewish, we simply celebrate Christmas to honor the Jewish killing of Jesus. Gentile and Jew alike, everyone wins.

"Serfs?"

In the year 1776, all serfs in Cohenia were liberated under the guidance of the grand Emperor Nuken - except the ones bound to his manor, of course. All serfs subsequently born in the area of the Grand Palace are forever bound to the land.

"* (http://youtube.com/watch?v=oHg5SJYRHA0)?"

All guests are subject to approval.

http://i121.photobucket.com/albums/o205/Franarama/Flag.png
Official Statement of the Federal Republican Duchydom of Franberry

First of all, A Merry Jew Christmas to our friends in Cohenia!

We are most glad the Cohenians are not only celebrating Christmas, but sharing it with the world, and inviting all leaders to participate. Most unfortunately, his Democratic Excellence, Geoli Joolitan, will not be able to attend the festivities due to a previous compromise.

He shall not, however, miss out on the spirit of the festivities, and would like to gift his admirable companion in Cohenia, Emperor Aaron Ferrin Stuyvesant, with 100 acrobat midgets, and 1,000 cows from the finest and most well respectable Franberrian ranches. We hope that these humble gifts shall add to the mood of happiness in Stuyvesant, and warm the heart of even the littlest Jew.


Dios guarde a Vuestra Honorabilidad,

His Most Democratic Excellence,
President of the Federal Republican Duchydom of Franberry,
Geoli Joolitan

-----

OOC: I'm away from zee intertubes ;___;

IMPERIAL NEWS NETWORK

“Hello, and welcome to Imperial News Network: your choice for the news you need.

“This morning, the Imperial Council voted to approve Imperator Malustar’s recent request for more funds to pay for materiel needed for the war against the Doomani. Although the war is progressing well so far, analysts have agreed that it could take some time to fully subdue the heathen nation, and it would be very foolish not to plan for such an eventuality. In the meantime, as our viewers are aware, Legionaries on standby have been reactivated and are undergoing preparation for transport to Doomingsland.

“Also, around noon today Jared McCabe, the Irish anarchist and heretic, was found guilty by High Inquisitor Kreegan. His execution, by evisceration, is scheduled to take place at five o’clock tomorrow morning and will be televised live on this network. Sources confirmed that the public trial of the heathen was not due to any success on his part in attracting attention, but rather due to High Inquisitor Kreegan’s personal decision to publicize the humiliation of such an insidious figure.

“Finally, as you may know, today marks the holiday celebrated by the heathen Christians as the birth of their false god, known as ‘Christmas’. Encouraged by the rumors that the Imperial Guard will turn a blind eye to any damages incurred against Christian-owned property, angry mobs filled the streets of most major cities this evening. In a paroxysm of fury, sixty known Christians were dismembered by the mob in Korronis alone, and one heathen who had dared to erect a symbol of idolatry known as a ‘Christmas tree’ in his front yard was lynched, sodomized with the tree by his angry neighbors. Nearby Imperial Guardsmen, some of them on-duty, were heard to remark: “Stupid infidel probably enjoyed it.” Bonfires were lit and Christmas-related objects were burned in an orgy of destruction, simply to prove how idiotic the infidel beliefs are. We have exclusive footage, taken from YouTube, of a foreign professor asserting the moral value of Christmas. Warning: this footage contains gratuitous application of heretical thinking. Viewer discretion advised…”

ooc: as promised, and to all those who cannot see the difference between OOC and IC, kindly GTFO and read the "TG for entry."
IC:
Salutations Brother Ferrin I of Cohenia,

I would love to attend this party. Unfortunately, Violet is doing poorly and has declined to attend, her lungs are acting up again. The doctors have assured us it is just a fit from the dry winter air, and have promised me they will take good care of her. Do you wish for me to bring anything?

Atal Amner

http://img517.imageshack.us/img517/7733/adofficialsealve7.gif

Official Statement From Aurum Domus High Command

We are very interested in opening up foreign relations with your great nation so our High General and his wife will be attending the party and will present you with a gift as a show of our appreciation of your great nation.

Greetings from Freiria. I am a representative, although I can only speak for my own experience.

Many of the Jewish population in Freiria engage in the liberatory act of seeing a matinee movie and then enjoying dinner at a Chinese restaurant, however there is much to be admired in your reclaimative act. With you permission, I would like to spread news of this custom to their community, or, if possible, arrange for a Cohenian to serve as a teacher-student on this subject.

OOC: TG for entrance is now null and void, waiting for los moderadors to respond to my demand D:<

Ah yes, Christmas time in Cohenia. Victory Square is decorated for the holidays; with a big, ornate tree decorated with lit-up skulls, lights, stars, and whatnot. The fresh snow over the tree made it even more of a site to see, it was marvelous indeed. Everyone (save the coalminers) was in a delightful mood - everyone was happy. Stores were open and raking in the profits of shoppers buying gifts for their loved ones. Women and men alike walked the streets of Stuyvesant, Hamilton, and Knox carrying large shopping bags from Elizabeth's Undercover, Stacy's, Proletarians Plus, Radio Hut, Ceil-Store, R.C. Nickel, PowerfulPurchase, Technology Town, the Clandonian Store, and much more. The Elizabeth's Undercover Winter Fashion Show was advertised in Knox's Polk Square, something a tad risque for the conservative town. The women were showing skin! Everyone was shopping in Cohenia, everyone. There was money to be spent, and bonuses to be spent too. There were gifts to be sent as well, how can one forget about that? Cohenians with ConEx were sending gifts to relatives in Franberry, Zukariaa, Rosbaningrad, all over.

One celebrating such a merry Christmas was our hero, Emperor Ferrin. Ferrin was sad though, his children were away at college and his wife was with her family in Hamptonshire. What could the Emperor do? Simply put, the Emperor would make a lavish party for all of his chums to frequent! The alcohol was purchased and brewed, the beef was purchased and ready to be cooked, the tree was cut from the most grand tree in the entire nation and brought to the Palace, to be decorated by the Emperor's very own serfs. To top it all off, twenty-five hundred forty-pound turkeys roasted in the numerous ovens across the palace. Millions of gallons of gravy boiled on stovetops as oilbarrels filled with alcohol were moved into the grand ballroom of the Palace. The Emperor smirked at the lavishness of the party.

TO: MY COMRADES ACROSS THE WORLD
From: Emperor Aaron Ferrin Stuyvesant

Hello, my comrades!

As you may or may not be aware, Christmas time is here! As always, I will be hosting my semi-annual Christmas party in the capital of my empire, Stuyvesant. All* (http://youtube.com/watch?v=oHg5SJYRHA0) are invited! I hope you can attend. It will be formal attire for the party, yet don't think it will not be a party! We will have a limbo party, pin-the-tail-on-the-Clandonian, and the greatest award of all. If you can play the special version of Guitar God (only for Jimtendo Mìì) and complete the Cohenian National Anthem on 'God' mode, you will get one hundred googolplex Party Pesos!! Party Pesos are usable in the nation of Franberry as legal tender as well! Come one, come all to the Cohenian Christmas Party - all leaders are allowed in* (http://youtube.com/watch?v=oHg5SJYRHA0)! Prizes will be awarded, too!

Thanks,

Ferrin I of Cohenia
Emperor of the Cohenias, Duke of Rosbaningrad, Annexor of Estonsko, High Priest of the Holy Lands, the Father of your Daughters

FAQs
"Wait a minute...," you may be asking, "isn't the Imperium of Cohenia a mainly Jewish nation?!"

Yes, that is true.

"Then why are you celebrating Christmas?"

As you may or may not be aware, Cohenian Jews enjoy money and free presents. Over the years of our existance, we noticed the joy of the goyem throughout the world during this year and wanted it for ourselves. To make the holiday of Christmas Jewish, we simply celebrate Christmas to honor the Jewish killing of Jesus. Gentile and Jew alike, everyone wins.

"Serfs?"

In the year 1776, all serfs in Cohenia were liberated under the guidance of the grand Emperor Nuken - except the ones bound to his manor, of course. All serfs subsequently born in the area of the Grand Palace are forever bound to the land.

"* (http://youtube.com/watch?v=oHg5SJYRHA0)?"

All guests are subject to approval.

To: Emperor Ferrin I of Cohenia
From: President John Holtz of Holy Paradise
Subj: RSVP
Although I would love to join the celebration, I cannot. I have a hostage crisis in the nation of the Militia Enforced State to attend to. May God bless you and Merry Christmas.

[OOC: Assume I'll go, but I won't be on until late Sunday (Sunday afternoon by US standards) so I might be late.]

To: HIM Ferrin I, Emperor of The Cohenias
From: HM Steven I, King of Prestonia

Merry Christmas my dear Emperor. I would be honored to celebrate this most glorious holiday with you in Stuyvesant this year. If I am accepted to the party, I will bring along some of the best vodka ever produced in Prestonia, as well as Christmas presents for the Cohenian Royal Family. I look forward to enjoying the Christmas season with you.

Merry Christmas,
King Steven I

Official Allanean Response

We would like to inform our friend the Cohenians that Alexander Kazansky, Chief Executive of Allanea and General Secretary of the Confederacy of Sovereign States, will arrive at your excellent party, and bring gifts as well.

In his capacity as a private person, he will bring Emperor Ferrin a case of awesome Dersconi vodka.
In his capacity as the CEof Allanea, he will unilaterally support the idea of mutual free trade with Jaredcohenia as a Christmas present to you.
And in his capacity as the General-Secretary of the United States, he will make a gift of one billion dollars in gold – knowing the Jaredcohenians love their gold – for the Emperor and his family.

He will be arriving in his personal DC-9 Ultra.

Merry Christmas and happy new year!

I shall attend your Jew-gathering on the day of THE LORD's birth, because God wills it.

-Imperator Maximus III Doomanus

OOC: For Pete's sale HOLD YOUR HORSES on the OOC posts till this gets sorted! I'll clean 'em out when it is, Jaredcohenia.

IC posts still fine.

OOC: http://forums.jolt.co.uk/showthread.php?p=13314845#post13314845

Please let this post be the last OOC post about this lovely train of discussion in this thread, there's the Moderation thread I posted, let's get Ballin.

IC:

Atal Amner pulled his overcoat about him as he strode across the tarmac, his personal Citation X powering down behind him. He nearly flew across the wide airport, snow swirling around him in the gloom of night. A lovely evening in Jaredcohenia. As he strode across the endless ramp, he thought back to his departure from New Heisen and Violet with a heavy heart, a sharp pang in his heart for his dearest wife.

The doctors had assured him that she would be fine, that this was just a fit, but they had assured him that Sarah would pull through. Sarah, slender and fit, pierced by a dozen bullets, spurting blood across her daughter. Sarah, futilely trying to protect Archleader Thompson from Gale's lackeys. And now, those same doctors assured him that Violet would pull through. Damn the doctors, they shall burn if she dies.

He finally reached the terminal, turning and gazing at his bodyguards and pilots as they disembarked the plane with several oblong packages. Ah good, they remembered. This will be one hell of a party, and I think Miss Maddox will be coming. The more the merrier, and this should make sure the festivities are a blast.

Alexander Kazansky stepped off his gleaming-white DC-9 just a few hundred meters from Atal Amner, his aides bearing the heavy case of excellent Doomani vodka. He himself was not yet drunk - having had only four glasses of vodka on the plane in preparation for the party, the General Secretary could take far, far more.

He was extremely formally dress even for a regular person, much less for the leader of goddamn Allanea – a black-and-white three-piece suit, shoes that cost more than some people's entire houses (and one doesn't just mean Clandonians), and of course a redwood and ivory cane that the Allanean leader played with haphazardly as he walked, slowly approaching Amner.

"Greetings, Your Honor, and Merry Christmas!”

The High General and his wife departed the custom C130J that served as the High Generals personal aircraft and entered a waiting armored limo. The limo began moving and two motorcycles driven by two of the ten members of the Marine Honor Guard drove to the front and back of the limo to guard against any potential threats.

In the back of the limo the High General and wife were nervously talking about the forthcoming party.

"Sam, I'm not sure about this. I don't think the Cohenians like us very much."

"Nonsense, they have no reason to hate us. We've never done anything to them."

"Well how about interfering in the precious metal and gem trade? The Cohenians have ruled that field for years and we only just expanded it outside our borders 60 years ago."

"Don't worry, if they try anything we have the Marines to protect us."

"Oh for Chri-" The Monarch of Questers, King-Emperor Alexander II slipped on his gloves and adjusted his £6 ($3200) coat.

"Don't be such a fuss Alex." His wife replied, making sure her dress, which cost more than a car in some countries, was immaculately presenting itself and allowed her aides to make one last adjustment to her hair before the Royal couple waved them off, with the exception of a bodyguard, and walked towards where Amner and Kazansky were meeting.

"But he's such a-"

"Yes Alex, I know. But we have to be polite." His wife shut him up with a smile that nothing had changed since they had fallen in love. She still had him wrapped around her finger. "There'll be none of that, understood?"

"Fine." He said, just as they came into range of the two national leaders. Moving themselves into the group, Alexander withdrew out a cigar box from an inside pocket (he had four), and pulled out a fine cigar, speaking a few words of broken No Endorsian to Atal Amner before he lit up.

"Why you talking this idiot?"

His wife, Lady Alissa - a fairly popular Royal name - was more courteous. "Mr Kazansky! What a pleasure to see you!" she said, teeth almost grating. "How have you been?"

Royal Household Office
Obsidian Palace, CCD
Grand Archduchy of Hamptonshire
United Realms of the Hamptonian Empire

Your Majesty Emperor Ferrin I of Cohenia,

I send to Your Majesty my warmest and most sincere wishes during this holiday season. I look forward with great apprehension to attending your celebration. As a token of friendship and brotherhood I shall bring along several cases of akvavit and bottles of the finest Trockenbeerenauslese found in the Royal collection. I will take the opportunity to personally deliver to you the present I had intended to ask your wife to give you.

Please receive, Your Majesty, my sincere salutations.

[Signed]

HIRAM Anne I, Grand Archduchess, Empress of the Hamptonians
Royal Household Office
Obsidian Palace, CCD, Hamptonshire, URHE

[OOC: I'm not going to do an arrival post, so assume she's at the party]

Ferrin stood by a window, cigar in his mouth, looking outside to see who had arrived. Some asswipe he didn't even know (Aurum Domus), his old drinking buddy (Questers), a blithering homosexual (Allanea), an acquaintance (Prestonia), another drinking buddy (Doomingsland), and a comrade (No Endorse); it would be a large feast indeed. Ferrin was wearing a several piece white tuxedo, made only from the finest silks imported from some nation he'd never heard of. His matching white top hat rested on a coathook on the other side of the room, a coat hook made of mahogany of course. The Emperor couldn't find his cane, however. His cane was a gift from the Emperor of Zukariaa, his cousin. It was made out of the tusk of an endangered species of elephant, with diamond studs on the bottom. The studs were especially useful for punishing lazy servants/field hands in the palace, the pain from the sharp diamonds would be unbearable to sit on. His initials were on the cane in trimmed gold, and the bottom of the cane was solid platinum. After minutes of frantically searching he eventually found it, the cane was under his bed next to his personal magazine/DVD stash. He took a lint roller to his suit, taking off any bit of dust that found its way onto the silk. He looked in the mirror, fixed himself up, and placed his top hat on his skull. Ferrin looked pimp. "Henry!," he screamed at the top of his lungs. Moments later a short, colored man appeared. "Yes, suh?" Henry spoke, his voice was high pitched and he had a scar running down from his eye to his mouth. The scar was from when he was a child, roaming the streets of Islwandesia as an orphan. Upon colonization, Ferrin adopted him as a 'family servant' and he was always an important part of the family. "Make sure all of the humidors are filled and there's someone ready to give anyone a cigar. If one person is unhappy, Henry..." He lifted his cane, smacking the end of it on his other hand.

Ferrin left his room and headed downstairs, to greet his guests in the grand ballroom. There was a large evergreen tree in the middle of the room, decorated with ornaments and garland. Adorned at the top was a large star, simply because it looked nice. Ferrin approached Amner, Alexander, his wife, and Kazansky. He greeted them with a loud "my comrades!" and reached out his hand for it to be shaken. "I hope you're enjoying the party so far, if you need anything to drink or if you need a cigar let any of my servants know. If you want to play some video games, I hope you're aware of the national anthem challenge. One hundred googolplex Party Pesos, legal tender in the nation of Franberry." He took his cigar out of his mouth, "I heard Ms. Maddox was going to be here, old sport," Ferrin's elbow nudged into Amner's side.

OFFICIAL IMPERIAL COMMUNIQUE

From the Most Imperial Highness, His Divine Majesty the Sacred Emperor; to His Most Excellent Brother, the Emperor of Cohenia

Greetings, at this, a festive time amid the bleakness of winter!

We wish to inform you that we intend to join the season's celebrations in Stuyvesant. We have never before spent time in Cohenia, but we welcome the opportunity now. We look forward to meeting you, Your Majesty, and we wish you profitable holidays.

By the Hand of the Sacred Emperor,

Ishamael II


* * *

The Sacred Emperor's entourage arrived (somewhat late, of course) at the Cohenian Palace. Fashionably late, and fashionably intoxicated. Ishamael looked every inch the world leader in flawless white tie with a ceremonial sword hanging from a belt, puffing on a cigar. It was considered odd for a Sacred Emperor not to drink and smoke at such events, and Ishamael had no intention of breaking decorum. His escort, Lucifer's former wife, Lady Melissa Miradin, attempted to reach over and straighten his tie, but the Emperor stopped her with a simple gesture. "Don't worry about it. It's fine. Come on...time to go."

His driver, a member of the Immortals, opened the door, and as cameras flashed, the Emperor stood, smiling and waving with a black-gloved hand, offering the other to Lady Miradin, playing the part of the stunning arm-candy very well indeed. He strode across the red carpet into the Palace, glancing over at a giant LCD screen mounted on the wall, with a live feed of someone playing Guitar God somewhere. Ishamael raised an eyebrow; he'd been playing the guitar since the age of five and had every intention of enjoying a good few rounds of Guitar God over some whiskey and cigars. Still puffing on his own, and smiling as the aide on his left whispered the names of those he passed, Ishamael strode straight for the bar and ordered a popular Kregaian cocktail known as a Blood Sacrifice, made from Lillet Rouge and Gordon's gin, which he sipped while observing his august peers enjoying the party.

Atal Amner inhaled sharply, not realizing the Allanean had approached. "Hello Mister Kazansky." He tipped his hat for a brief moment, quickly replacing it in the frigid air. "I trust you are doing fine this lovely evening?" He pulled his greatcoat tighter and motioned the fellow leader ahead of him through the door.

"Ah, it feels far nicer in here!" He shed his coat, holding it out for a bodyguard to take. "I trust the festivities shall be entertaining. I've heard talk of all kinds of folk arriving, even some from the lesser countries." As he finished, he turned to watch the arrival of Alexander II, smiling at Lady Alissa as she stooped through the door.

"I have no idea." He replied gleefully, flawless No Endorsian flowing from his mouth. He reverted back to English, beaming at the couple. "Alexander, it seems ages since we've seen each other in person. Elain's wedding, wasn't it? And goodness, I had no idea you were fluent in our humble language! Lady, Alissa, your taste in husbands is impeccable. But come! Enough bandying of words, appears that our noble host approaches!"

After the Cohenian had spoken, he fell in beside him, ready to inquire about large open spaces resistant to explosives. But Atal was cut off before he could speak.

"I heard Ms. Maddox was going to be here, old sport," an elbow dug into his side, forcing the leader into a slightly ungainly posture. He quickly recovered, drawing a flask from a breast pocket. "Indeed?" He took a sip, lighly slipping the flask back into his pocket. "Heavens, I haven't seen the good lady since the Estonsko Accords. This should be interesting....... But oh, good sir, I must make a request. I have a gift for yourself and your lovely wife, but I require a large area to show you, preferably one that is rather fire resistant. Can one be provided?"

A confused Ferrin looked at Amner, he gripped the cigar in the side of his mouth with a few teeth. "An empty, fire resistant field you ask?" It was Amner, crazy Amner. A man who built a nuke out of tooth picks and a jug of milk, Ferrin knew Amner for a long time. At the Estonsko Accords, they saw a good show of women gently caressing each other in good sport, then they gently caressed the females. "I suppose we can go to the serf quarters, it's a tad fire resistant. Who cares anyways, they're just serfs. It's right outside."

The serf quarters were a bare, empty field right next to the Emperor's croquet and rugby fields. Ferrin was very confused at Amner, why would Amner need an empty field? Was he going to try and kill Ferrin? Eh, who cares. Ferrin's immune to death after seventeen assassination attempts. His right arm was prosthetic, his heart was artificial, he had a knee replacement...he was the six million dollar man without the nifty sound effects. The field was filled with negroes - the Emperor's preferred servant. After years of slave trading, the negro was transformed into a bred animal. A strong negro can fetch a pretty penny at any market, but the wealth of the Emperor made him able to kill any slave who he didn't like. "Now, old sport. What is it you want me to do?"

Maximus puffed the Generian cigar calmly and sipped his whiskey, observing the other partiers from his seat at the bar. He was clad in his signature gold-trimmed black ceremonial armor and his crimson cape, his gladius by his side. He now wore a black eyepatch over his left eye: the one he had lost in his duel with Damien Dreadfire, although he'd certainly avenged that injury during that little scuffle.

Scanning about and stroking his neatly-trimmed black beard, he saw old friends: Ferrin and Amner, his former enemy, Kazansky (who incedentaly had sent Maximus a nice Christmas gift in the form of several Mhoudian prisoners who had been responsible for Christian deaths; Maximus' gift to Kazansky consisted of a locker full of shiney new rifles and anti-tank missiles), his brother-in-law the King of Questaria. Maximus' Praetonian wife, Empress Elizabeth, had gone over to chat with the queen, leaving Maximus at the bar, Caesar telling her that he'd join them after he'd had a few drinks.

"Good party, eh Ishmael?" he said to the Kregaian beside him nonchalantly.

After another sip Maximus nearly spat the drink out.

Wait...shouldn't I be shoving my sword in his gut right about now?

Maximus' head snapped over towards the Kregaian, an eyebrow raised.

Right...

His right hand moved over the hilt of his blade and his eye narrowed. A wry smirk came across his lips. Noting the trouble out of the corner of her eye, Elizabeth tactfully slipped away from the Questarians and back behind her husband. Things were about to get very interesting.