NationStates Jolt Archive

OCC:
To: All non-Nova Rpers
Try to keep your number of troops as low as possible if your sending them into Prochyna, I don't want a quick victory.

To: Nova RPers
Some of you guys already have plans, :p have fun!

Introduction to Prochyna

Prochyna is a Small state in Kansiov with about 25 million people. 60% Of the population are Muslims, the others are a mix of Asian and Russian. IT is one of the most neglected states in Kansiov primarily after 4 consecutive wars in the state itself, throwing it into a state of despair. However, it is still a place where Kansiov stores most of its old military equipment, efforts to move them to a safer location was hampered when military convoys fell into "terrorists". With great risks of more equipment falling into the hands of the enemy, the Kansiovians stopped the transfer.

The recent Kansiovian Hostage Crisis has esclated another war, when Prochynaian terrorists took over the Crystal Jade Hotel in downtown Kansiov, and the incident resulted in over 90 deaths, mainly of foregin nationalities. This angered the Kansiovian public and they wanted Kansiovian troops to be moved in the wipe out the threat immdiately. However before the Kansiovians could moblise their forces, gun battles were already breaking out in the Capital of Prochyna, Glensbil. The war had begun...

Hecbeyl Nuclear Powerplant, Prochyna, 0634 hrs

Lt. Borísov was peering through is binoculars, the buildup of men outside has caused him to be weary due to ongoing tensions in recent weeks. Many men in his neighbourhood has mysteriously dissapeared, most of them Muslims. A white Sedan parked outside the powerplant. After 20 seconds, they were still inside, however all he could see were blurly dark images of movements in the car. Borísov, turned back and drank a sip from his cup of tea.

He was stunned.

4 Guys, plain-clothed drew out weapons, 3 of the AK-47s and one of them a Mosin Nagnat Rifle, and started to open fire at the guards.

"This is not a drill, This is not a drill! We are under attack! Workers shut down the powerstation immdately!"

Borísov picked up his walkie-talkie and told the rest of his Platoon of about 24 men to defend the main entrance at all costs. He only had around 37 men, and more unkown miltas were approaching. 2 of Borísov's guys brought up a Police 4x4 Hatchback with a mounted PK on the back. Using their 7.62mm rounds, they sprayed at the miltas, pinning them down.

Borísov grabbed his AK-47 and dashed for the nearest telephone to call Glensbil Police HQ, but the lines were cut off, either down, or too busy. He ran to the entrance and joined the fight.

Waves of Milta poured in, and they brought in RPGs and Rifle Grenades, lobbing them at the Secturity forces.

The Police Hatchback was hit by an RPG rocket, killing the two men. It was looking bad for Borísov. He ducked behind a Metal crate, constantly peeping out and throwing a few shots at them.

A disturbing photo had just reache dhte office of war: from satellite, it appeared that a nuclear power station was under attack in Kansiov.

"Scramble 3 tactical bomber squadrons AT ONCE! And prep 2 squads of paratroopers! We have a crisis on our hands!"

=======

From Liberty Airport, New Zevkhay, came the first squadron of ten A-10 Tactical bombers. Each was armed with underwing cluster bombs and 1 laser-guided bomb, and in each nose was a heavy "Puff Dragon" AT gatling gun, this time armed for use against infantry. These would take an hourt o reach the plant, but that would be long enough.

From what the government knew of nuclear reactors, they should be able to SCRAM it immediately, shutting down the core and locking the facilty. Even if the militia got in, they would take nearly 6 hours to get into and start up the reactor. And it was practically impossible for any explosives to breach the core defences: otherwise, it would not be allowed in Nova.

Behind them droned 2 Transport planes, each with a squad of 10 men onboard. These would help repel the rebels, and keep them away from the installation.

Prochynaian security forces scrambled 2 Police Mil-Mi 18s, each carrying about 5 men armed with AK-74s, and basic body armor. The Helicopters came under intense fire, mainly from small arms. The gunners of both Helicopters did a good job, by gunning down several Milta carrying RPG on their backs ready to fire at them from the rooftops.

Landing under intense fire from the milta below, the helicopters landed, unloaded their load and took off, back to base immdiately. Along the way, one helicopter was shot down, by and unknown rocket, possibly heat-seeking surface to air missile. With about 10 more new men and news that Alfegoian air support and troops were on their way to help them, Borísov was more confident that he was able to defend the powerplant.

However, just before he and his men's confidence were at their peak, a fourth wave of milta came, this time, it was large. They hurled more RPGs at them, some hitting the walls of the powerplant, it was a scary experience for Borísov, when an RPG rocket wizzed past his head, and landed in a car park lot meters behind him. He quickly pulled himself together and fire at incoming miltas. Killing 2 of them instantly. One of his officers manning the PK machine gun on the tower was killed, the situtation was getting worst...

Police HQ, Glensbil

The downed Mil-Mi 17 sooned arrived back to the HQ. Quicky they dispatched 2 BRDMs and a BTR-152 to look for survivors. The moment they convoy got out of the Gates of the HQ, they came under intense fire, Milta men ducked in and out of windows, spraying at the Convoy with whatever they had. The Armor of the vehicles, thankfully could deal with these types of weapons.

The Convoy soon arrived at the crash site, there seems to be no survivors, even so, they had to pick up the dead bodies of their comrades. They formed into a Turtle Formation, Blocking all Small Arms fire with their Armor, as the Medics hurridely scrambled for the dead bodies and body parts. Even in such a humane operation, the convoy came under waves of men, crazily firing their weapons at full automatic. There were serveral close calls, an RPG-7 landed less than a metre from the BRDM. In 5 minutes the clean up was done, the convoy went back into column Formation, and they called in a Mil-Mi 24 to support them along the way. The Mil-Mi unleashed its 20mm Cannons and Machine Guns at the Armed Mob to clear the way.

Serveral attempts to down the Mil-Mi have also failed, this included in very desprate measures such as firing small arms and trying to use a motar to get a direct hit on the gunship. In return the Gunship unleashed her arsenal on the helpless miltas, killing them or wounding them severely. The convoy and gunship made it back to the HQ, which is also increasingly getting lobbed by Motars and RPGs.

The A-10 pilots looked onto their enhanced-reality screens, and in red was pulsating the targetzone, 40 miles ahead.

They switched off virtual reality and then dived nearly verticallyonto the enemy, raking the non-Kansiov securtiy vehicles with explosive shells.

They pulled up, then circled and came down on a ridiculously low run, strafing the enemy more, this time with solid rounds.

Now out of ammo in their forward guns, they rose quickly, and deployed 2 cluster bombs each over the target, before hitting the afterburners to quickly reach homebase and refuel.

======

Above the smoking vehicles, the two transport planes arrived, and 2 squads lept from the rears, each wearing standard Alfegos uniform, but with a red beret: the paratroopers.

They fell down and deployed their parachutes, and landed as the A-10s left from the cluster bombing.

They immidiately took up defensive positions, shooting at any militia with their modified AF-07P assault rifles on 3-round burst, or launching grenades from under-slung laucnhers.

They beagn to close in on the plant, and then enter the compuand, gunning down any resistance.

Bredford Goverment Convention -

The old-new president, Lord Oliver Mosley IX, opened speech.

"I was informed by our military intelligence department that several unidentified rebellious elements in Kansiov have attacked nuclear powerplant at a state named Prochyna. i suggest we will start this convention by discussing what effects this will have on our nation, and what will be our reaction, if there will be one..."

The Minister of Defence and Chief of Staff, William Alberta, replied.

"I believe that we don't need big reaction to this. we will simply need to keep watching over the situation, and send few missiles to scare those petty rebels away."

Half hour later, five "Type 11A Lion", or "Lion" aircraft were sent for a small attack mission in Prochyna.

A message was sent by squad A's sergeant to the inbound Bredford planes.

"Abort attack! I repeat, abort attack! There are friendlies by the powerstation and rebel fighting has not spread from the compound. Attack will only exacerbate the situation! Again, do not attack, over."

The squad then entered the powerplant, while the other squad stayed outside to clear the compund and defend against any more incoming rebels.

Within an hour of the first separatist attack against Hecbeyl power station general staff officers of the Arcturan Defence Forces had convened to discuss the situation and make recommendations for the civilian leadership. Minds had been focused since the Crystal Jade Hotel siege and the fatal outcome, and the Intelligence Directorate had intercepted growing chatter indicating possible further attacks. Even so, where the hammer of terrorism finally fell had still succeeded in taking the intelligence community by complete surprise.

Within minutes of the first VHF radio intercepts from a remote monitoring station just inside the Arcturan-Kansiovian border a "Vector" UAV surveillance drone that had been launched to monitor the situation. Flying parallel to the border inside Arcturan airspace at 70,000 feet it was soon returning real-time video of the battle at Hecbeyl power station, and the secondary battles erupting at various government buildings in the regional capital of Glensbil city.

The Technocracy had long adopted a position of non-interference in the Prochyna question, considering it an internal matter for the Kansiovians to resolve, but granting asylum to Prochynans and tolerating pro-independence supporters to raise funds and campaign to some discomfort for their neoighbour. Some within the Technocracy hoped neutrality might allow them to help broker a compromise between the two sides, supported by billions of accounting units in promised development aid, but progress had proven difficult to impossible to achieve. Now the Technocracy was faced with the possibility of nuclear disaster just across their border. This time the civil war might be a little too close for comfort to ignore.

Ninety minutes following the attack on Hecbeyl power station recommendations had been sent by video link from the Joint Forces Headquarters to the civilian leadership in the General Secretariat and decisions had been made. Border forces had placed on the highest alert and a special operations capable quick reaction force activated to be placed on jump status with a full compliment of A400M tactical airlifters and A-20A Renegade light attack aircraft to protect them. More ominously, the Secretariat had agreed to a Defence Forces request to place a company of chemical, biological and radiological decontamination troops on standby and A340Ms to fly them to wherever they may be needed.

For now the Technocracy would continue to watch, listen and wait, but if its interests became directly threatened the carefully created neutrality of many decades could evaporate with the same suddeness of the fireball of a nuclear explosion...

Principality of Damirez. Undisclosed Location.

Several hours before the rebels in Prochyna made their move, several people with considerable power in the Damiran Intelligence Services gathered together for a friendly chat. The meeting, taking place in absolute secrecy was all about one thing and one thing alone. The expected Prochyna outburst.

From Homeland Security to Foreign affairs, they well all there. Known and unknown officials in The Principality secret service were preparing to move the chess pieces.

“Is it confirmed?” one of them asked, his black, conservative suit accentuating the frown on his face. He had been the one first aware of the loss of Damiran life in Kansiov, and he was not happy at all with that.

“Yes, my agents report increasing mobilization amongst the Muslims in the province, there is also strong evidence that supports that theory. We have to be prepared for that,” another, surprisingly for some an elegantly dressed woman, answered his question.

“My sources confirm that. There is also substantial evidence amongst the reports I received that they will be aiming for the nuclear plants. Most likely they believe they can make a bomb. It is however highly improbable that they will succeed, but the risk of a meltdown is high enough on its own,” a somewhat younger man added to the conversation.

"So these are the facts,” the elderly gentlemen stated while cleaning an imaginative speck of dust from the sleeve of his black suit. Nobody was fooled by the gesture. Even though he looked like a gentle grandfather, this man survived through several wars and kept many in his agency alive, many times through sheer power alone, or that’s what they liked to think it was.

“The question is, how do you propose to handle this,” it wasn’t a question as it was a demand for an answer. Although in theory they were all equal, his age and experience made him by far the de facto leader of the group. Most likely, he already had an answer of his own.

“Payback,” one of them answered.

“Payback’s such a funny word. Some would argue it brings little, but those never lived in this time and age. I agree, they killed one of our own, we must show them just why it isn’t done. Beyond that, there is the matter of regional stability. It’s not something we can overlook and the president will undoubtedly act upon this.”

“Perhaps we should start making preparations for an actual military intervention. Once the parliament and the president give the go ahead, all the ropes should be laid down for them to act,” another elderly man, silent until now, spoke.

“Yes. I shall inform the president on our findings. Be ready to act my friends, the country will need us.”

“Yes…”

---

DNN – Urgent News Report.

“Greetings to all DNN viewers. We apologize for the interruption of our regular program and bring to you urgent news.

Just minutes ago, reports from the nation of Kansiov arrived, showing a rather grim image of the nations well going. Just days after the terrorist attack which caused the loss of Damiran life and that of various other innocent citizens, Kansiov is faced with a civil war. The province of Prochyna has raised in arms against the government. We only hope that this will not bring in more blood…

Wait! We have just received a message from the President’s Palace! The president is going to make a statement on the situation!”

In just a few minutes, the image showed by televisions all around the nation shifted, showing the president of The Principality. There were no flashy introductions, no convoluted proceedings, just one man with a message for his country.

“Citizens of The Principality, I stand before you bringing grave news. As you all know, only a few days before, news about the death of one of our own reached the nation in a shocking television display. Innocent people, murder in blind hatred that has no justification, and yet they want more.

Instead of asking for help they picked the path of war, the path of war. Must human life be lost? Even as I speak now, Prochyna is in flames as rebels are attacking the officials with no account for human lives, for the civilians on the streets, for the regular man working to earn his bread.

The instability brought by this war in our region cannot be ignored! We, as a nation as peoples of a proud country place importance on life, and fought hard for that light, the light of freedom, hope and existence.

This is why, with a heavy heart I announce that The Principality has decided to involve in this conflict. Somewhere, somehow, we must draw the line!”

As President Librescu finished his speech, the camera switched view to a reporter.

“That was President Librescu announcing the involvement of our nation in the current civil…”

---

Military base.

Quiet. That was the only word to describe the situation at the base where the soldiers were preparing for their mission. With prior warning about the now official orders, they were ready to move out into the field.

It was surprisingly quiet though. No sound of last minute checks, no sound of rustling clothes, not even a sneeze. These men were trained killers, proud soldiers of The Principality and probably the most important part about them, members of two of the Damiran Legions.

The Legions were a myth on the Damiran Battlefield and in the army. The ultimate unit in some views, the elite of the army they were masters of their designed fields and often spearheads of Damiran operations. And there were four thousands of them here., all heading for one place, Prochyna.

OOC: Not all points covered, but it lays the tracks for that.

Glensbil Airport

36 Mil-Mi 17s enterered the vicinity, they were not ordinary Kansiovian troops, but were the feared Golden Eagle Spetsnaz Reigment. They landed, many of them were surprised by the fact that gun battles were drawing closer to the airport, and amazing commercial airliners, packed with frightened passengers took off.

The Airport is located smack right in the middle of the City. From what they could see, the Miltas are forming a Humanwave to overrun the Airport. There were already 300 Kansiovian Regulars defending the City, but this was not enough to keep them at bay. However, they did have the advange of the air to help them. Serveral Su-37s were already pounding the Miltas on the ground, with ease.

Very soon, they landed, immdiately they set up a defensive perimeter, and waited for the storm...

The men continued their advance intot he plant. They had found what they feared: the reactor hall doors had been blown open. They had perhaps minutes to clear the area.

Grenades arched in, follwed by hails of bullets as they loosed volleys into the smoke.

=====

A pair of A-10 ground attack bomber came down towards the airport. As they dived, they loosed rounds off at the rebels beginning to surround the airport, and dropped bombs in the road to leave impassable craters.

Gunshots sprang out at the Airport. Civilians who had their flights delayed due to a large amount of Military Equipment coming in, and the risk of being shot down by Rebel Bofors Anti-Aircraft guns were shocked. Many went for cover, outside a massive mob of about 2,000 people, carrying an array of weapons, from RPGs, AK-47s and even Mosin Nagnat Bolt Action Rifles. They were supported but several Technical Trucks of their own, along with bus loads of more Miltas, helping them out. Those who did not have any weapons lead the front, forming a human shield, hoping that Kansiovian security forces will follow the rules of engagement, "Not to fire an unarmed person". However, they were wrong. A Motar Shell landed smack right in the middle of the crowd, and sent several Miltas flying. This angered the mob, as a result the entire lot of 2,000 charged at the Entrance of the Airport.

A Big Mistake.

2 Kansiovian Mil-Mi 24 Police choppers hovered above the Horizon of the Airport building, and unleashed whatever they had on the Civilians below, from the 4 PK Machine guns to the 20mm Cannons, they tore the Miltamen that were hit to pieces. Some men in the crowd fired RPG-7s at them, but failed miserably. One landed on the roof of the airport, while they other went rocketing skyhigh. Kansiovian security forces fire flashbang grenades at the crowd, while the Golden Eagle Regiment used much harsher methods, like poudning Motar at them, gunning them down with machine gun and tossing several live round grenades at the crowd. Amazingly the crowd was so stunned till most of them forgot to fireback. A man stood up on a trunk of a car, shouted a few phrases of Arabic, before the crowd went cheering up and falling back, somekind of "Propoganda Speech"...

He didn't have time to finish his last phrases of his sentence before he was shot, in the head by a Sniper. This time the miltamen were more organized and gave effective return fire. Two Kansiovian Troops were killed, along with 6 Secturity forces, Golden Eagle members took no losses, however were pinned down by the hail of bullets. Most of them returned fire by popping out of the wall firing a few shots before ducking down. More effective methods were motaring their positions, and GPS systems gave motar crew an excat bird's eye view of the battle, pinning them with amazing accuracy.

Just before they thought it was all over, a second wave came, much to their despair...

Looking good, Kansiov. May join later, tag for interest!

Bump?

+++With the eruption of the conflict in Kansiov, the Adygean military was put in a difficult, but not insurmountable, position. Normally, the Black Sea state would have relied on either Russia or Ukraine to take care of the threat, but as neither had totally gotten themselves together, the Adygean government felt that it was required to do something instead, given that it was the most prominent of the nations in the Caucasus and that the conflict was happening in their very own back yard (it didn't hurt, of course, that Georgia and Armenia had formally requested some action from Adygea in light of the conflict).
+++First, however, the Adygeans needed time to plan their attack, and to gather as much intelligence as possible on the separatists. The conflict had been long in the coming, with many Eastern European officials wondering, sometimes publicly, when the frustration of the Prochynan separatists would boil over; certainly the Kansiovan Hostage Crisis just a couple of years ago had pointed to a looming conflict very strongly, along with several other incidents and a general feel of discontent and stress.
+++Colonel General Hazret Kakabadze would be leading the operation, under the supervision of General Tolenka Kakirkin, the latter of which was the civilian commander of the Adygean Ground Forces. He assembled his staff on 13 October, 2007, and began to plan the pacification of Prochyna. Meanwhile, General Kakirkin would contact the Kansiovan government to inform them that Adygea was ready, willing and able to aid the Kansiovan Army in its mission to restore stability to the war-torn province, should it like any help from the ANV.

For two months they had been doing their best to prove, once and for all, that the earth was round. They had started by walking due west, into the setting sun; when they could not walk, they took boats or even climbed over mountains, crawling on hands and knees, weapons and supplies strapped over their backs. The laden asses had been left behind at the Gates of the Danube; and try as they might, the knights could not find any to replace them. Hence they trudged on, almost oblivious to their surroundings, seeking to prove the theory that they would someday return to their homeland from the other side.

It was Sir Brian the Snobbish's turn on watch, which the other knights sorely regretted. Sir Brian, when tired, was apt to gain a glazed expression and fall asleep on his feet, making him practically useless; of course, in the current state of the once proud warriors of the Royal Guard, the same was true of anyone. Nonetheless, there were instances in which Sir Brian had for some reason failed to notice a large attacking Saracen army, or a bear, or for that matter a passing train. Even when he did notice something, he disdained to share it with any but Sir Gunther the Grossly Overweight, the only member of the party whom he believed to meet his intellectual standards.

They were camped along a side road, usually peaceful in these parts; but not tonight. Throughout the hours of the night, choppers and aircraft continued to pass overhead, and on a main road not too far from the side road the sirens of police cars were deafening. At length Sir Bob the Abominable, one of the two self-appointed leaders of the group, roused himself from his slumber.

"Methinks we shall receive little sleep tonight, my companions," he said, as he began buckling on his armour and greatsword.

"Thou speakest truly, O Bob," quoth Sir Lewis Cockroach-slayer, who was Sir Bob's foremost sycophant. "What noise is this? Zounds! 'Tis no plain medicine for mine aching head!"

Sir Brian growled at Sir Lewis. "Thy aching head wilt have to wait, knave. Some villainy is afoot; 'twould well set my heart at rest to know what be the cause of it."

"Thou shalt get thy wish, Sir Brian," Sir Bob said. "I fully intend to discover, and perchance to slay, those who wouldst disturb the virgin slumber of such innocent boon companions as ourselves."

The other ringleader of the group, Sir Saturn the Unbelievable -- a tall thin man with a high reedy voice -- answered. "O Bob, speak not so rashly! None shalt be slain, excepting if he dost challenge such valiant knights as ourselves. Once we have discovered the source of these noises, such as couldst be made by passing strange and mighty monsters, we shall get them to stop by force or by artifice, and return to our noble quest. Sir Flatulent, rouse thou the company."

Sir Flatulent the Neumoclast, an Adygean emigré, answered. "No probs, dude." Lifting up the ground sheet, he proceeded to dump all of the remaining knights and their sleeping bags onto the cold wet ground.

Sir Saturn watched him benevolently. "Sir Flatulent be a passing valiant knight, an he speak solely in incantations and disdain the arms and armour of the King's Royal Guards," he murmured to Sir Bob, who only shrugged as he attempted to fasten his breastplate.



An hour later, the party of knights still trudged along the road. The sky was still dark; but from the city there rose light, such as might be produced by strange fires or perchance by the magical, invisible aether known as electricity; every now and then a horseless carriage would streak past as though fleeing from the pits of hell, where such an abomination had obviously been spawned. These were indeed foreign parts. The knights, however, were used to seeing the Devil's work coupled with God's name by unbelievers, and so ignored the carriages.

There was a great noise in the sky, and the first time Sir Bob and Sir Flatulent and Sir Gunther and some of the other knights stared in fascination as a bird with a whirling wing upon its head flew past; but it ignored them, as did the other flocks of birds that passed by, still with that same curiously grating cry. The knights observed that the houses here were quiet and drawn back a distance from the road, and with a good distance between them as well.

After another three hours the knights were beginning to curse their sore feet; the only sound that could still be heard was the clanking of their armour. A younger knight, Sir Phredd the Anorexic, was heard to exclaim that he would trade his greatsword for a good horse. It was obvious they could not go on like this for much longer, and day was about to break; the first pinks and blues were creeping into the dark sky. Eventually, with some kind of subtle magick, Sir Flatulent the Neumoclast succeeded in hijacking a sufficiently large horseless carriage, a van of some variety. The driver and co-driver were executed, as befits servants of the Devil; and every of the knights crossed himself before entering the diabolical machine, and sprinkled it with holy water, although it did not explode or even disappear as a result.

Then, horror of horrors! The world moved! Although the Church had always taught that the earth stood still and the sun and planets revolved around it, it suddenly began to move, obviously through some satanic treachery. Sir Flatulent, manipulating instruments at the dashboard, proceeded to move the world around the vehicle until at last the motion stopped and the knights dared to open their eyes once more and peer out of the windows at the scene before them.

It was chaos. Armed with strange weapons of all varieties, a mob was assailing a fortress which obviously was barely holding up. Strange flying machines lay stranded on the ground; explosions and crashes from the Hell-spawned weapons wielded by the insane mobs of demons taken human form stood out like bright lights against the smoke and fire. This was the battle and, crossing themselves thrice and consecrating their swords in the holy water, the knights would be there to fight it.

With a mighty battle-cry of "For God and the King!", they plowed the demonic vehicle straight into the midst of the mob, crushing the demons; as it burst into flame, indicating to the knights that Satan was retrieving his property, they leaped from the vehicle with blood-curdling screams and brought their greatswords into play. Every one of the knights had been trained in the King's own school of swordplay; there were none better. Even Sir Flatulent, wielding a mighty stick that spewed fire and shards of metal, joined in the fray; from atop the ruins of the vehicle he pumped bullets into the oncoming warriors, their own bullets pinging off his expertly forged armour.

True enough, at long range the Knights would have stood no chance against rocket propelled grenades and mortars; but at short range, there was little good sidearms and other such weapons could do against the thick plated armour of the knights of the Royal Guard. Swords, axes, and lances impaled and cut through the mob of demoniac soldiers as the knights fought their way towards the embattled airport terminal.

Ok..... I really couldn't resist on this one.... <.< >.>

For two months they had been doing their best to prove, once and for all, that the earth was round. They had started by walking due west, into the setting sun; when they could not walk, they took boats or even climbed over mountains, crawling on hands and knees, weapons and supplies strapped over their backs. The laden asses had been left behind at the Gates of the Danube; and try as they might, the knights could not find any to replace them. Hence they trudged on, almost oblivious to their surroundings, seeking to prove the theory that they would someday return to their homeland from the other side.

It was Sir Brian the Snobbish's turn on watch, which the other knights sorely regretted. Sir Brian, when tired, was apt to gain a glazed expression and fall asleep on his feet, making him practically useless; of course, in the current state of the once proud warriors of the Royal Guard, the same was true of anyone. Nonetheless, there were instances in which Sir Brian had for some reason failed to notice a large attacking Saracen army, or a bear, or for that matter a passing train. Even when he did notice something, he disdained to share it with any but Sir Gunther the Grossly Overweight, the only member of the party whom he believed to meet his intellectual standards.

They were camped along a side road, usually peaceful in these parts; but not tonight. Throughout the hours of the night, choppers and aircraft continued to pass overhead, and on a main road not too far from the side road the sirens of police cars were deafening. At length Sir Bob the Abominable, one of the two self-appointed leaders of the group, roused himself from his slumber.

"Methinks we shall receive little sleep tonight, my companions," he said, as he began buckling on his armour and greatsword.

"Thou speakest truly, O Bob," quoth Sir Lewis Cockroach-slayer, who was Sir Bob's foremost sycophant. "What noise is this? Zounds! 'Tis no plain medicine for mine aching head!"

Sir Brian growled at Sir Lewis. "Thy aching head wilt have to wait, knave. Some villainy is afoot; 'twould well set my heart at rest to know what be the cause of it."

"Thou shalt get thy wish, Sir Brian," Sir Bob said. "I fully intend to discover, and perchance to slay, those who wouldst disturb the virgin slumber of such innocent boon companions as ourselves."

The other ringleader of the group, Sir Saturn the Unbelievable -- a tall thin man with a high reedy voice -- answered. "O Bob, speak not so rashly! None shalt be slain, excepting if he dost challenge such valiant knights as ourselves. Once we have discovered the source of these noises, such as couldst be made by passing strange and mighty monsters, we shall get them to stop by force or by artifice, and return to our noble quest. Sir Flatulent, rouse thou the company."

Sir Flatulent the Neumoclast, an Adygean emigré, answered. "No probs, dude." Lifting up the ground sheet, he proceeded to dump all of the remaining knights and their sleeping bags onto the cold wet ground.

Sir Saturn watched him benevolently. "Sir Flatulent be a passing valiant knight, an he speak solely in incantations and disdain the arms and armour of the King's Royal Guards," he murmured to Sir Bob, who only shrugged as he attempted to fasten his breastplate.



An hour later, the party of knights still trudged along the road. The sky was still dark; but from the city there rose light, such as might be produced by strange fires or perchance by the magical, invisible aether known as electricity; every now and then a horseless carriage would streak past as though fleeing from the pits of hell, where such an abomination had obviously been spawned. These were indeed foreign parts. The knights, however, were used to seeing the Devil's work coupled with God's name by unbelievers, and so ignored the carriages.

There was a great noise in the sky, and the first time Sir Bob and Sir Flatulent and Sir Gunther and some of the other knights stared in fascination as a bird with a whirling wing upon its head flew past; but it ignored them, as did the other flocks of birds that passed by, still with that same curiously grating cry. The knights observed that the houses here were quiet and drawn back a distance from the road, and with a good distance between them as well.

After another three hours the knights were beginning to curse their sore feet; the only sound that could still be heard was the clanking of their armour. A younger knight, Sir Phredd the Anorexic, was heard to exclaim that he would trade his greatsword for a good horse. It was obvious they could not go on like this for much longer, and day was about to break; the first pinks and blues were creeping into the dark sky. Eventually, with some kind of subtle magick, Sir Flatulent the Neumoclast succeeded in hijacking a sufficiently large horseless carriage, a van of some variety. The driver and co-driver were executed, as befits servants of the Devil; and every of the knights crossed himself before entering the diabolical machine, and sprinkled it with holy water, although it did not explode or even disappear as a result.

Then, horror of horrors! The world moved! Although the Church had always taught that the earth stood still and the sun and planets revolved around it, it suddenly began to move, obviously through some satanic treachery. Sir Flatulent, manipulating instruments at the dashboard, proceeded to move the world around the vehicle until at last the motion stopped and the knights dared to open their eyes once more and peer out of the windows at the scene before them.

It was chaos. Armed with strange weapons of all varieties, a mob was assailing a fortress which obviously was barely holding up. Strange flying machines lay stranded on the ground; explosions and crashes from the Hell-spawned weapons wielded by the insane mobs of demons taken human form stood out like bright lights against the smoke and fire. This was the battle and, crossing themselves thrice and consecrating their swords in the holy water, the knights would be there to fight it.

With a mighty battle-cry of "For God and the King!", they plowed the demonic vehicle straight into the midst of the mob, crushing the demons; as it burst into flame, indicating to the knights that Satan was retrieving his property, they leaped from the vehicle with blood-curdling screams and brought their greatswords into play. Every one of the knights had been trained in the King's own school of swordplay; there were none better. Even Sir Flatulent, wielding a mighty stick that spewed fire and shards of metal, joined in the fray; from atop the ruins of the vehicle he pumped bullets into the oncoming warriors, their own bullets pinging off his expertly forged armour.

True enough, at long range the Knights would have stood no chance against rocket propelled grenades and mortars; but at short range, there was little good sidearms and other such weapons could do against the thick plated armour of the knights of the Royal Guard. Swords, axes, and lances impaled and cut through the mob of demoniac soldiers as the knights fought their way towards the embattled airport terminal.

Ok..... I really couldn't resist on this one.... <.< >.>

OCC: My guys are seeing nothing...