NationStates Jolt Archive

Hiigara Palace, Shores of Loch Ness, 9 Miles outside Inverness

Galan Mckay, the first minister of Nova Pictavia, had volunteered to chair the peace-talks. He was, he supposed, as neutral to this conflict as it comes. He strode confidently to the podium at the centre of the Sky Suite, a small, modern debating chamber designed for diplomatic events like these. It was surrounded by a massive glass dome with views straight onto the Loch. Many varieties of plants adorned the light pine furnishings of the venue, it could hardly be any less of an institution for peace.

"So," Galan begins, "who wants to address the room first?'

((OOC: Assuming my diplomats have already arrived...)

Steward Mahone sat with his arms crossed and eyes narrowed, surrounded by two members of the honorific Steward's Guard, highly trained and elite soldiers who's only task was to protect his person at all costs. Though they had failed in the recent commando raid on the Reichstag, he was still quite confident in their abilities.

"I will." He announced, standing up and grabbing a large suitcase he had brought with him. "But first, I would like to return something that these...people gave me." He continued, barely managing to conceive his seething hatred for furries in a mock tone of politeness. He opened the suitcase, and pulled out a rather gruesome item. A severed head of one of the commandos that attempted to take his life. He smiled and tossed it into the lap of who ever, or what ever the furry leader was and waited to see his reaction.

"Ah" starts Galan, "That was, well, a tad unexpected." his harsh Scots accent begins to break through, which it usually does when he is stressed. "And the furry delegation, your, erm... riposte?"

At this moment several guards began holding their FN-P90TR PDW's ever so tightly...

OOC: Anyone who had any involvement in the conflict, or who participated in any of the threads of the war can feeel free to join in. just assume all your delegates are already here

President johnson of the free furry islands gasped and threw the head off his lap. he looked at the tocrowkian steward and glared. "was that really necesary?!" he asked and several guards in the room began to vomit from the barbaric sight.

a tall Cazelian man with red eyes ad dark brow hair, wearing a marine uniform entered the room and looked at the Tocrowkian man "was that really necisarry?" he asked somewhat angrily

Following the two men saying "Was that really necessary?", Seth shrugged apathetically. "Probably not. But it felt good. And is there an echo in here...?" He replied, barely managing to restrain a chuckle. "Now then, onto buisness. As you know, the Tocrowkian Reich has been brutally and unjustly attacked by people. I mean furries...I mean, well, you know what I mean." He sat back down in his chair and put his feet on the table.

"Therefore, we demand justice. Short of total annihilation or unconditional, we demand the following." He pressed forward a draft of the armistice for all to see:


We demand that FFI make an official apology to the Tocrowkian Reich and her people.
We demand that FFI sacrafice a full 50% of their yearly GDP.
We demand that FFI renounce it's sovereignty, and cede it's lands into the Tocrowkian Reich.
We demand any and all government officials abdicate their positions, and acknowledge His Grace, Steward Mahone as their new leader.

OOC: I realize this is Semi-Open, but I was involved somewhat via a diplomatic response-I will provide proof if need be-though it was largely ignored because it had no immediate impact. I would still like to send a delegate if that is agreeable...

OOC: I realize this is Semi-Open, but I was involved somewhat via a diplomatic response-I will provide proof if need be-though it was largely ignored because it had no immediate impact. I would still like to send a delegate if that is agreeable...

((OOC: Fine with me. The more, the merrier.))

The government of the Cevnian Federation had heard of the peace summit occuring and immediatly sent a delegate. Minister Hiedrik Gerin arrived several hours later...

Minister Gerin made his appearance just as the Tocrowkian Delegate threw his gruesome gift at the FFI delegate. 'The furries deserved it, attacking a nation so much larger than they was suicide!' he thought. Gerin reached over and shook hands with all the delegates-minus the furry delegate. He took a seat and addressed the Tocrowkian delegate directly.

"Cevnia agrees with you course of action, and had we been in your postion we would not be having this conversation. The Free Perv-oops-Furry Islands would be lieing on the bottom of the ocean! Nonetheless we are happy that a peaceful resolution has been found, and we support your ultimatum. The FFI has given up its right to independence..." Gerin waited for a response.

((OOC: Just FYI, the Tocrowkian delegate is also the Head-of-State of Tocrowkia. :P))

Following the two men saying "Was that really necessary?", Seth shrugged apathetically. "Probably not. But it felt good. And is there an echo in here...?" He replied, barely managing to restrain a chuckle. "Now then, onto buisness. As you know, the Tocrowkian Reich has been brutally and unjustly attacked by people. I mean furries...I mean, well, you know what I mean." He sat back down in his chair and put his feet on the table.

"Therefore, we demand justice. Short of total annihilation or unconditional, we demand the following." He pressed forward a draft of the armistice for all to see:


We demand that FFI make an official apology to the Tocrowkian Reich and her people.
We demand that FFI sacrafice a full 50% of their yearly GDP.
We demand that FFI renounce it's sovereignty, and cede it's lands into the Tocrowkian Reich.
We demand any and all government officials abdicate their positions, and acknowledge His Grace, Steward Mahone as their new leader.


Galan noted that this was starting to increasingly appear like, well, High School. Their lucky the furry delegation hadn't ran off crying, as there was a definite anti-furr atmosphere building. Galan decided to try and save some of the talks...

"Mr, Mahone, despite the actions of the rather bold leaders of the FFI, we would like to question why the entire furry population would have to suffer under an oppressive regime. No offense. But surely an alternate solution can be reached? Perhaps the FFI can grow under your supervision for a few years, under new Furry leadership.

"Oh, and someone clear that head up. Now. Quickly."

Seth shook his head. "Your concern is noted. However, I can assure you as long as the FFI accepts our ultimatum, no harm will come to their people by Tocrowkian hands. We will, however, request their military and political leadership be turned over to Tocrowkian hands to be tried for war crimes."

occ: Sorry for my absence

President johnson sighed and put his head low. he knew there was no choice but accept these terms or risk millions of deaths of his own people and that was the last thing he wanted. "Mr. Mahone, we accept your terms. but heed my words when i say my people will not go down quietly, and they will not stand for your fasist oppresion!"

Deputy Foreign Minister Kevin Lynch stood up and then asked,
"Before I make my case for the furries, does anyone mind if I smoke?"

occ: Sorry for my absence

President johnson sighed and put his head low. he knew there was no choice but accept these terms or risk millions of deaths of his own people and that was the last thing he wanted. "Mr. Mahone, we accept your terms. but heed my words when i say my people will not go down quietly, and they will not stand for your fasist oppresion!"

ooc- download google toolbar or firefox, they have a spellchecker that you desperately need.

:)

Random hotel in Tocrowkia

Alexander Kazansky woke up with a horrible hangover. Next to him was Allison, the singer from the Kahanistani band 'Mary Rapers'. She was sleeping peacefully with a broad smile – she was clearly happy about what he did last night.

He looked at his watch. Why the fuck am I not asleep? It's like three AM or something.

The phone rang again, and Allison woke up. “Wha?”

“Don't worry.” - he kissed her gently on her lips. - “Wait a second...” he picked up his cellphone. “So, are you calling to tell me you've completed my instructions? No? Why? I said I want the Questarians dead. What? I want no excuses! When I say dead, I mean dead! You should be killing them now! No, you are not killing them now, you are talking to me! Do you know it is three AM?”

Then there was a pause. “What? Oh god, what the fuck.”

He slammed the phone shut. “That does it, darling. I'm sorry about the idiots. Tough job, you know, killing all those thousands of Doomani and millions of Questarians.”

“No, not a problem... I've had enough sleep.”

“Mmm.” - said Kazansky as he kissed Allison again - “I think I have a few ideas for things we can do instead of sleeping, you know...”

“Again?” - Allison blinked in disbelief.

“Yeah. Just let me grab a Ritalin...”

* * *

Two hours later, Kazansky was out of Tocrowkia. He also advised the Kahanistani band to get the hell out of there, really fast. And as soon as he got back to Allanea, 300 Allanean ships were put under way to the Furry Islands.


OOC: Sorry for the liberties taken with Allison. :D

Seth yawned midway through the furries speech. It was clear he didn't really give a rats ass about what he had just said. "Whatever you say, President 'Johnson'. I have what I came for, which is the surrender of your pathetic nation. Now I will take my leave, as I have some good ol' oppressing conquered populations to do. Toodles!"

And with that, the Tocrowkian Steward and his guards rose, and left the conference.

Official Message to Tocrowkia

We would like to have a negotiation before hostilities start. Perhaps we can avert them.

Official Message to Tocrowkia

We would like to have a negotiation before hostilities start. Perhaps we can avert them.

We have no interest in discussing the fate of sexual deviants with yet more sexual deviants. So you can go ahead take any proposal your sick Allanean minds may have come up with and stick them right up your collective asses.

-Reich Foreign Ministry-

We have no interest in discussing the fate of sexual deviants with yet more sexual deviants. So you can go ahead take any proposal your sick Allanean minds may have come up with and stick them right up your collective asses.

-Reich Foreign Ministry-

Official Response by the Dersconi Foreign Ministry

It would do Tocrowkia well to learn manners, especially in a formal statement by your own foreign ministry. Derscon does not look kindly on having its allies treated with such blatant disrespect as Tocrowkia displays, and does not take kindly to fascism.

Tocrowkia is treading on thin ice. However, we do make the recommendation to Steward Mahone to fire the Foreign Minster and all those responsible for making statements, and hire a new, more competent, staff.

Deo Vindice.

--Zheleztsolupp Kabanov
Minister of Foreign Affairs
The Divine Prussian Empire of Derscon

Official Response by the Dersconi Foreign Ministry

It would do Tocrowkia well to learn manners, especially in a formal statement by your own foreign ministry. Derscon does not look kindly on having its allies treated with such blatant disrespect as Tocrowkia displays, and does not take kindly to fascism.

Tocrowkia is treading on thin ice. However, we do make the recommendation to Steward Mahone to fire the Foreign Minster and all those responsible for making statements, and hire a new, more competent, staff.

Deo Vindice.

--Zheleztsolupp Kabanov
Minister of Foreign Affairs
The Divine Prussian Empire of Derscon

There is a fatal flaw with your statement, Mr. Kabanov. The Tocrowkian Reich is not fascist, neither economically, politically, or socially. The assumption that it is in fact a Nazi state is mere Anti-Tocrowkian propaganda. There are very few things our society is not open to, and Furryisim is one of them. Thus, we are suspicious of any nation that regards such things as acceptable, and thus, our reply to Allanea.

And Steward Mahone is quite satisfied with his current staff, thank you very much.

-Reich Foreign Ministry-

ABHOR THE RACIST
CLEANSE THE FASCIST
DESTROY THE THEOCRAT

The very mark of sexual and social intolerance is the mark of the fascist. The fact that you are willing to destroy, by their millions, people who worst crime is drawing cartoons and wearing weird suits is a notification that you are hateful fascist scum. Had you been destroying jews, gays, or Satanists, the entire world would rise against you in anger, and you know it. The reason you beat on furries is because your government is composed of cheap limpwristed bullies who beat only on those whom nobody will defend.

Sincerely yours,
Grand Admiral Ferdinand de Limecour

* * *

As these words were delivered, 100 Allanean cargo space shuttles, each carrying 10 tons of orbit-to-ground semi-guided bombs. They passed in low earth orbit, far out of the reach of normal AA, and dropped their bombs on two of the transports accompanying the Tocrowkian fleet. The logic was simple – spam something with enough bombs and it is bound to blow up.

Galan Mckay woke up with a sudden start...

"Wait, what!?"

The entire room turned to him all at once. Then it became clear to himself that he'd drifted off. He cleared his throat, and awkwardly ran his hand over his head.

"So, ummm *cough* what's going on? We're all happy and resolved right?" Everyone in the room continued to stare.

"No? Ah. Hokay..." And Galan crossed his arms and leant back again.

OOC: Seriously what's going on? Where'd Allenea come from? Arg.

((OOC: He surrendered, and now Allanea is going to stick up for him by attacking me...))

Tocrowkian Invasion Fleet

However, it was a far more profound logic that protected the Reich's valiant forces. That logic being prepared for such an attack by placing high-tech weaponry on all of their ships. So it was that, within several minutes before the bombs even impacted, the RADAR systems on the Tocrowkian ships picked up on the enormous signal.

As all ships of the Reich were equipped with a triumvirate of ABM/AA weapons systems, consisting of chemical lasers, interceptor missiles, and CIWS systems. The Allanean bombs made easy targets for these systems, as within seconds, chemical lasers were destroying the bombs left and right. Any that survived that were either destroyed by the interceptor missiles, or the CIWS systems, which fired depleted-uranium high explosive rounds.

The end result, unfortunately for the enemy, was no significant damage to the fleet, and no casualties.

The Allaneans merely yawned and continued their voyage towards the Tocrowkian ships, keeping up combat patrols around their ships. They would bide their time for now.