NationStates Jolt Archive

OOC: I'm more than happy to allow people to post in my news thread, but there are a few rules. There are only two types of responses I would like to see: 'letters to the editor' and/or news articles from foreign bureaus that prominently feature BL.

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In depth: The new cabinet

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The Cabinet Room in the Aedfices Parliamentarii

With this week's Socialist Party victory, Consul Alistair Davidson took the opportunity to rearrange Cabinet. Who makes up the 2012 cabinet?

Consul Sir Alistair Davidson (http://newsimg.bbc.co.uk/media/images/42933000/jpg/_42933713_newsarkospeechget203b.jpg) - An MP since 2007, Sir Alistair was the founder of the Londinian Democratic Socialist Party. He became a household name when his party finally grew large enough to provide serious opposition to Sinclair's Libertarian Party. In 2009, as Sinclair's party began to decline, Sir Alistair became the Minister of Foreign Affairs, and made significant strides in improving BL's reputation. 2010 saw Sinclair leave, and Sir Alistair took the national helm, and still holds it to this day.

Deputy Consul James Azzopardi (http://news.bbc.co.uk/nol/shared/spl/hi/guides/457000/457040/img/1183989278.jpg) - Elected to the Senate in the 2010 general election, Mr Azzopardi was immediately given the post of Minister of Culture, Media, and Sport, and introduced reform to assist the LBG in remaining impartial. 2012 saw him become Deputy Consul, and he is expected to take over from Sir Alistair upon his retirement.

Minister of Foreign Affairs Cecilia Belladini (http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/en/thumb/8/8e/Vesperlynd.jpeg/255px-Vesperlynd.jpeg) - Promoted to be foreign minister in June 2010, at 32 becoming the youngest person to hold the post for 60 years. She was promoted to the job after building a reputation as environmental minister at a time when "green" issues dominated political debates.

Chancellor of the Exchequer Adélaïde Pryce (http://economist.com/images/20070602/2207EU2.jpg) - Appointed as the chancellor in September 2012, has long been close politically to Alistair Davidson. Her previous task was trade and industry, and before that, designing a radical new welfare scheme as Home Minister.

Minister of Justice Andrew Swan (http://newsimg.bbc.co.uk/media/images/40869000/jpg/_40869047_mbeki_ap.jpg) - Regarded in Kensington as a competent and reliable minister and one of the better Senate performers in the Cabinet, Swan became the justice secretary in June 2010. He has described himself as "tough on crime", but has lobbied for a mix of policies, some of which have promoted rehabilitation rather than deterrence.

Minister of War Elliot Crompton (http://news.bbc.co.uk/nol/shared/spl/hi/guides/456900/456937/img/1183050952.jpg) - A parliamentary fixture, Crompton has served in Parliament since 2007, under a variety of party platforms. He has stated several times that "ideology isn't [his] concern - carrying out the will of the government is."

Minister of Intelligence Ginevra Vauxhall (http://newsimg.bbc.co.uk/media/images/44019000/jpg/_44019677_marthalouise_ap203vb.jpg) - Appointed to the office in June 2010, Ms Vauxhall prompted various reforms within the Secret Intelligence Service and the Security Service, making them more efficient and more flexible.

Minister of State Security Albert Lorentz (http://news.bbc.co.uk/nol/shared/spl/hi/guides/457000/457039/img/1183645480.jpg) - As chair of a recently created Ministry, Mr Lorentz is the first individual to hold the position, and is responsible for internal security regulations and the like.

Minister of Health Elizabeth Tredagar (http://news.bbc.co.uk/nol/shared/spl/hi/guides/457000/457040/img/1183996392.jpg) - Appointed to the position in June 2010. She has pushed for expansion of the State Health Service, though budgetary problems prompted her to downsize by one-fifth and supplement lost manpower with newer and more efficient technology and methods.

Minister of Transport Tommy Seymour (http://news.bbc.co.uk/nol/shared/spl/hi/guides/457000/457039/img/1183646102.jpg) - A new addition to the Cabinet, Mr Seymour received his promotion to Transport in the 2012 elections, after serving as undersecretary in the same Ministry. He has stated publicly that plans for a nationwide underground service will be pursued.

Minister of Culture, Media, and Sport Chloe Yuhjijad (http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/thumb/0/06/Daniella_Sarahyba.jpg/402px-Daniella_Sarahyba.jpg) - The first woman to serve in this position, Ms Yuhjijad was appointed in June 2010, and is responsible for creating the first Londinian national football team to participate in the 36th World Cup.

Minister of Education Aiko Kobayashi (http://newsimg.bbc.co.uk/media/images/41019000/jpg/_41019190_happycouple_ap203.jpg) - Appointed in June 2010, she was the first to propose mandating tertiary education and lowering admission fees to universities.

Minister of Business and Enterprise Olivia Quinn (http://news.bbc.co.uk/nol/shared/spl/hi/guides/457000/457040/img/1183982020.jpg) - Olivia Quinn became MBE secretary in Sir Alistair Davidson's Cabinet, in June 2010 at the age of 52.

Minister of Environmental, Food, and Rural Affairs Albert Nazarbayev (http://news.bbc.co.uk/nol/shared/spl/hi/guides/456900/456937/img/1183056435.jpg) - He was moved, aged 31, from international development to environment secretary in Alistair Davidson's new Cabinet. He had held the international development position since 2010, having enjoyed a rapid rise since being elected to Parliament in a by-election in 2007.

Minister of International Development Chase Ryan (http://news.bbc.co.uk/nol/shared/spl/hi/guides/456900/456937/img/1183051543.jpg) - Chase Ryan moved to the Department for International Development in June 2010 at the age of 39 after a year as transport secretary. He joined the LDS after the 2007 general election. The Pembrey Beach MP is a professional politician, whose rise in LDS ranks has been relentless.

Minister of Work and Pensions Tejas Avakian (http://news.bbc.co.uk/nol/shared/spl/hi/guides/456900/456937/img/1183053681.jpg) - Tejas Avakian took on the Minister for Work and Pensions in the September 2012 reshuffle at the age of 57.

Minister of Communities and Local Government Marcus Fulvius Iotapianus (http://news.bbc.co.uk/nol/shared/spl/hi/guides/456900/456937/img/1183056690.jpg) - Marcus Iotapianus became communities secretary in Alistair Davidson's 2012 cabinet, at the age of 51. In the last Cabinet he was minister without portfolio as well as party spokeswoman - a post he lost to Flavia Zoé Ellsworth who also beat him and four others to win the contest to take the post.

Minister of the Home Office Robert Wilson (http://news.bbc.co.uk/nol/shared/spl/hi/guides/456900/456937/img/1183052741.jpg) - The 2012 promotion was the latest in his successful run of positions since he left behind his military tactics teaching career at Port Hemali Naval Academy when he was elected as an MP in 2006. Within two years he was a junior minister, and went on to ministerial posts in health, trade and industry and education, finally being appointed Chief Whip in 2010.

Story from LBG NEWS:
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Published: 17:16:59 LST

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OOC: I had been thinking about making one of these for some time, this has convinced me.

Thead away!

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New agency takes over Kensington Metro renovations

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After a failed experiment involving using private corporations to finance the repairs and maintenance of the Kensington monorail system, a new provincial agency, Subterrugla Kensingtii (STK), has resumed the subway's costly renovation.

Nearly fifteen million people ride the Kensington Metro's twenty underground rail lines, and delays the past few weeks have hit thousands severely.

The private corporation Calhoun Transit Services had been contracted initially to begin the repairs in 2011. But after a year of work, only one line has actually completed modernization, and nineteen lines experienced intermittent amounts of repair, with work sites frequently left unattended for days on end.

Mayor Heinrich Linden said that Calhoun's work was "unacceptable". "The people of this great city deserve more than these haphazard services," the mayor said at a press conference.

Mr Linden went on to say that Kensington's international image, especially the image of the city as a hub for commerce and tourism, would be devastated if Calhoun were to continue such "shoddy performances". The mayor welcomed the creation of Subterregula Kensingtii.

STK has estimated the completion of the Metro's overhail to be 2015 at the earliest.

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Published: 03:53:02 LST

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Majoring in prostitution?

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Though the government has allowed legalized prostitution for nearly two hundred years, it has never considered supporting it before - but that might just change.

Ministry of Education Undersecretary Amelia Hertz proposed making it possible to actually major in prostitution at state-run universities.

"Funding for tertiary courses in prostitution could be considered under changes aimed at boosting quality and relevance in the sector," one MP said in a Senate debate.

Many Londinians are outraged at the possibility that their tax dollars could go to supporting prostitution.

"I cannot believe the gall of that undersecretary," one Londinian woman protested. "To think that we'll be supporting such indecency and moral corruption!"

However, the government says that funding will be carefully watched, and the programmes will be highly regulated. A proposal laid out by Undersecretary Heinz states that 'teachers would be volunteers' who had to obtain 'special training to teach such courses'. Furthermore, to discourage people from flocking to the courses, Mrs Heinz wrote that 'all applicants must demonstrate that standard academic pursuits are unsuitable'.

"Whilst we cannot eliminate prostitution, we can make it safer and of better quality," Amelia Heinz said. "That's what I hope to achieve with these programmes, in addition to the existing regulatory laws of the world's oldest profession."

Story from LBG NEWS:
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Published: 03:53:02 LST

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TO: Minister of Foreign Affairs Cecilia Belladini
British-Londonium

FROM: Dr. Harold Carson
Ministry of State
Commonwealth of the Crystal Mountains

RE: Diplomatic Recognition

__________________________________________________________

We would like to officially recognize the new British-Londonium Government and suggest that our two nations trade ambassadors.

OOC: It's the same government. The Consul is the same as the one before the elections.

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First city academy opens in Kensington

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The first of Consul Alistair Davidson's 'city academies' opened today in downtown Kensington.

The academy, Sir Alistair Davidson Academy, opened only a few blocks away from the Aedifices Parliamentarii.

Academies, unlike regular state schools, have far more flexibility in terms of curriculum setting, though they still must comply with GCSE standards and government regulations. In addition, academies are to have private sponsors, and in return for their money, donors are able to have a say in what goes on in the school - to a point. Sponsors simply get a certain number of seats on the school's Governing Council, which is otherwise composed of Ministry of Education officials and the academy's teachers.

The new academy, not surprisingly, has been sponsored by the Consul himself, who has expressed a desire to not only create a state-of-the-art educational facility for Kensington's brightest, but a school centred around the social sciences and literature.

"At Davidson Academy, we're trying to make history and literature and politics part of these students' lives," Headmistress Selena Alamati said. "While other secondary schools are more testing oriented, we're trying to get these students in touch with Londinian society and culture."

Sir Alistair Davidson Academy is also the testing ground for a variety of new, cutting-edge technologies, such as holographic projectors, computerized desks, biometric school identification cards, and a variety of new teaching methods.


Story from LBG NEWS:
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Published:03:53:02 LST

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OOC; Your consul didn't win the election, the conservatives did.

http://forums.jolt.co.uk/showthread.php?t=532228

OOC; Your consul didn't win the election, the conservatives did.

http://forums.jolt.co.uk/showthread.php?t=532228

OOC: Have you considered that maybe, just maybe, he had already chosen who would win regardless of the poll?

That's what I did, and I can, because I am the player behind TWSP as he is the player behind BL and thus can do whatever he wants with his nation.

OOC: Grrr

*adds Consul Davidson to his 'Politicians To Kill' list*

The Republic of One World Alliance wishes to show its full support of this government under the British Londinium.

We are pleased to see that the British Londinium takes such great initiatives in securing its democratic government which is in line with the will of the people.

British Londinium, the Republic would like to send its official support and recognition towards your government as a legitimate governing body of the citizenry of the British Londinium.

-His Excellency, Chancellor Nicolae Augustus of the Republic of One World Alliance

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The Commonwealth of Nova Pictavia
Official Communication

We would like to congratualate LBG News on years of first class journalism. LBG has been at the foreground of many of the worlds major incidents and has done so with a professionalism above many other news networks. Is it obvious that I am a fan?

~Galan Mckay
First Minister, New Pictish Parliament

OOC: Oh boy, a fan! :p
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BL military to receive 'cultural training'

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Members of the elite Ninth Legion

After the debacle in the Cazelian War, Londinian military forces are receiving new 'cultural training' to adapt to the changing face of war.

The programmes are designed to assist Londinian soldiers with interfacing with foreign nationals during invasion and occupation operations.

"Cazelia was a mess," remarked General Jane Milligan, director of the new scheme. "A complete and utter failure of our military apparatuses. We were unprepared to deal with such a drastically different culture, and our inability to do so manifested itself in the draconian measures implemented there."

The Centre for Advanced Operational Culture Training is the new military body specialised in "improving soldiers' cultural skills and foreign language abilities".

In extended operations, the CAOCT intends on teaching soldiers awaiting deployment fragments of the native language and key components of the area's culture. However, when no such operations exist, the CAOCT plans on teaching basic, 'universal' lessons on things such as fostering trust in a hostile civilian population.


Story from LBG NEWS:
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Published:03:53:02 LST

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Martial arts called into question

The martial art of shamshir-saif has been performed in British Londinium for nearly two millenia, entertaining billions throughout the course of its existence. But now, hundreds of Londinians have come together...to denounce the sport.

This version of fencing originated in CE 341, as a method of training the elite Imperial Guard, and is based around the use of the scimitara londii, or Londinian scimitar. In modern times, the scimitar is dulled and affixed with a rubber tip and lined with electronic sensors for scoring purposes. Practioners are traditionally prohibited from wearing any type of clothing. Shamshir-Saif is traditionally played in an 12 metre by 12 metre square field, though many now opt to play on the European fencing strip.

But the group 'Londinians for a Respectable British Londinium' (LRBL) says that this ancient sport ought to be scrapped.

"It is disgusting," a LRBL spokesman said. "Not only is it glorified violence, it's a hedonistic sport - but does that stop millions of children from participating in shamshir-saif? No. And that's got to change."

Others argue that shamshir-saif is exactly what British Londinium needs. Shamshir-saif, without a doubt, offers visceral thrills - indeed, the prospect of actual viscera - at a time when a tag team of corporate money and health and safety regulations appear to have knocked the stuffing out of other sports and pastimes.

The debate regarding the sport has become so heated and large, that even the government feels as if it needs to step in. Minister of Culture, Media, and Sport Chloe Yuhjijad announced at a press conference that "the Ministry stands by shamshir-saif. It is one of the few sports in existence that is distinctly ours, and we cannot afford to lose it to placate those who feel it "isn't respectable."

In the meantime, however, the majority are content to keep on playing - even with the overly-versatile rules and prohibition on playing clothed.


Story from LBG NEWS:
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Published:03:53:02 LST

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First Londinian War command centre closes

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Fifteen years after the joint Atopian-Skgorrian invasion of British Londinium, the Ministry of Defence has decided to convert PAF Cathcart - the base from which the Atopian occupation was stopped dead in its tracks - into a military history museum; at the 'send-off' party, Battle of Glascovia veterans shared their thoughts with the LBG.

"King William sat there, and [former Consul Sir Alexander] Saakashvili sat there," said Air Commodore Robert Walsh plainly, pointing to two leather chairs. "From there they planned the counterattack on Glascovia. That battle ended the occupation."

The chairs in reference sit in the office of Field Marshal Aaron Ritter, the mastermind behind the Londinian resistance.

The veterans dare not touch or otherwise disturb the office, viewing it and its former tenant with a nearly religious reverence.

People's Air Force Base Cathcart is now surplus to requirements and the historic building, subject to planning permission, is to be turned into a museum and apartments.

Hearing the Battle of Glascovia veterans talk of their "spiritual" home and their "grandfather" Field Marshal Ritter, it is easy to understand their sadness and anger.

"I just can't describe the emotions I feel when I enter Cathcart," Wing Commander Simon McClane remarked. "I mean, we conducted a war from here - we gave this country her freedom back from Cathcart! Else we'd all be members of the Atopian Fascist Party, little Hitler Youth conscripts marching dutifully into hell."

The closure is part of a modernization scheme by the MoW, which entails the retirement of older military bases in favour of newer, more advanced bases. PAF Cathcart is nearly fifty years old now.

"She's served her purpose," Intelligence Minister Ginerva Vauxhall opined in a speech at the ceremony. "And done a great service to her country. But just because it is being retired does not mean it will die. PAF Cathcart, even if a museum, will always remain a symbol of hope, struggle, and, ultimately, victory itself. It's heritage must be preserved for future generations to understand the heroism and courage of their forefathers."



Story from LBG NEWS:
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BL raises interest rates

The Londinian Central Bank rose interest rates in the country by 0.27% today to ensure a stable exchange rate and to stabilize the economy.

The LCB ordered the increase in commercial bank's one year deposit and lending rates.

This raise came only days after the Ministry of Finance released a white paper stating that British Londinium had well surpassed the country's projected growth rates by three percent.

The LCB said the rate adjustment would help to "guide reasonable growth of credit and investment, adjust and stabilise expectations about inflation and maintain basic stability of general price levels".

Story from LBG NEWS:
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Published: 03:53:02 LST

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Agricultural industry threatened

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A new 'vertical agriculture' structure

Between a rapidly growing population, limited space, and rising prices of key staples, many are circulating 'apocalyptic' scenarios entailing the end of the industry. The LBG takes an in-depth look.

Santander's Bakery has been baking authentic Londinian sourdough bread since 1899, in the heart of Teishebani. Decorated in a patriotic white, red, and black exterior with gold lettering, the exterior seems conspicuously old-fashioned and at of place in the heart of a bustling city.

But don't let that fool you. Inside, behind glass counter brimming with delectable treats, Santander's uses some of the most advanced baking equipment on the market. Santander's has always resisted becoming part of a chain or surrendering its independence.

"I don't want to commercialize it," the store's owner said. "Part of our success is in the fact that Santander's isn't a common occurrence. We're a unique culinary experience."

But not all independent food-related businesses can survive like Santander's has. Not only are commercial supermarkets providing tough competition, but the prices of bread and meats have increased by nearly twenty five percent within the last fiscal year.

Those aren't the only things rising in price, according to the Ministry of Environmental, Food, and Rural Affairs. Over the past ten years, grapes, milk, rice, sugar, salt, and butter have all experienced price increases well over the cost of inflation.

The problem: a lack of growing area. Only twenty-four million acres (97,000 sq km) of land are used for growing within British Londinium - the rest of the area is consumed by rapidly growing urban centres to accommodate a population numbering in the billions.

"The country's got to balance giving people roofs over their heads or giving them enough bread to eat," farmer David Miller said. "And people want to be warm and have a place to call home above all."

What's the government's solution? Nobody quite knows yet. British Londinium has been engaging in major operations in the colony of Britzkium to make it suitable for agriculture, including highly costly terraforming programmes to ensure maximum amounts of arable land.

Even that, though, does not eliminate the country's dependence on foreign nations to provide the country with nearly fifty percent of its food supply. Attempts are still in the works to genetically modify plants to create more food. Most promising though, is the advent of "vertical farming", a massive thirty-storey structure with glass walls and topped off with a slew of solar panels. On each floor there would be giant planting beds, indoor fields in effect. There would be a sophisticated irrigation system.

And so crops of all kinds and small livestock could all be grown in a controlled environment in the most urban of settings. That means there would be no shipping costs, and no pollution caused by moving produce around the country. And, most importantly, the structures would optimize space efficiency.

Currently, three of these structures have been built by the University of Amalfi, with stunning success. The government is in the process of building these nationwide.

But in the mean time, it seems we'll have to get used to paying more for food.

Story from LBG NEWS:
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Published: 03:53:02 LST

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Desalination plant opens in Glascovia

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After a five week drought in Glascovia, the government finally has approved plans to open up a desalination plant in the city to alleviate future water shortages.

The plant is slated to begin full fresh-water production in 2014. It is predicted to make nearly 280 million gallons of water a day when at full production - enough water for two million citizens.

"This plant is crucial in order to ensure proper water supply for the people of Glascovia and its surrounding area - an area which is unusually susceptible to drought and minimal rainfall," Minister of Environmental, Food, and Rural Affairs Albert Nazarbayev said.

However, Eco-Syndicalist MPs, still bitter from their crushing defeat in the elections, have spared no opportunity to criticize the plan.

"This is like using chewing gum to plug up a hole in a dam," one Eco-Syndicalist MP remarked in a Senate session. "The government should instead conduct a bigger, strategic review of people's water usage and work to reduce demand and leakage, introduce metering in homes and encourage residents to install water-saving technology."

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Kensington Metropolitan Police places more constables on the beat

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The police have begun a high-visibility, three month operation to crack down on street crime in the city.

The campaign, termed Operation Redemption, will focus especially on crimes within the West End.

The programme began yesterday in the borough of Nyquist, with plans to bring Redemption to the entire West End by the end of the first month.

"I would like to warn anyone who is thinking about travelling into the West End to commit crime to think again," said a police spokeswoman.

"Not only will there be more police and community safety officers out on the streets but we will be deploying undercover officers to target offenders in the area."

Studies have shown the majority of victims are single men, who are preyed upon by so-called "date thiefs", who pretend to be attracted to the victims in order to steal from them.

A constable interviewed on the street said this: "The message is simple - if you are approached by a stranger who tries to hug you, dance with you or start up a conversation, they may well be trying to steal from you."

Story from LBG NEWS:
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Published: 11:10:04 LST

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National Exigency Act repealed

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After President Alexandre Lassiter invoked the National Exigency Act during the Cazelian crisis to grant Consul Sir Alistair Davidson emergency powers, the Parliament has voted to repeal the legislation.

Passed in 1999, the act would grant the Consul complete and absolute power for a period of six months.

"The National Exigency Act is nothing more than a loophole for future Swanners to take control of this country," Conservative leader Sarah Halifax said. "And whilst Sir Alistair is nowhere near being a megalomaniacal dictator, we know not who will take the office of Consul in the future."

Even the Consul himself applauded the National Exigency Act's repeal. "When emergency powers were bestowed upon me, I couldn't help but feel...dirty," Sir Alistair remarked. "When you look at who wielded it in the past, it seems to be common sense to repeal it. After all, the Ministry of Defence is more than capable of conducting a war in an efficient manner, and to date, there has never been an instance of Parliament interfering with the mechanisms of war."

The repeal was passed with a sweeping landslide, with only three dissenting votes.

Story from LBG NEWS:
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Published: 20:59:42 LST

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BL victorious 3-1

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Goalkeeper Colbert Tafani

The Londinian national team crushed the Limbrogidlian team in the first round of the WC 36 qualifiers.

The Limbrogidlians received the kickoff, expertly weaving the football past the front lines of the Londinian defence, only to have Sinclair punt the ball deep into the other side of the pitch, where team captain James Yossarian scored the first point of the match, only minutes in.

Twenty minutes later, the Limbrogidlians scored their only goal for the match, experiencing little resistance from Tafani, who was, unfortunately, being chased around by a rapid porcupine, who was shot nine times by the Kensington Metropolitian Police; neither the constabulary nor the porcupine have chosen to speak to the press.

At halftime, the score was 1-1, with little progress in sight. However, seventeen minutes into the second half, forward Ajeet Prasad barreled through the Limbrogidlian team, scoring British Londinium's second goal, but was given a yellow card when he, in a fit of uncontrolled glee, kneed Limbrogidlian defence player Aaron Parker in the testicular region.

Finally, with precisely three minutes and fifty four seconds left in the match, Ben Serrant scored the third goal by using a streaker who was running through the field as a battering ram to plow through the defence.

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Terror laws 'curtailed'

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Legislation allowing for detention without charges for 31 days has been curtailed by Parliament, shortening the time length to a fortnight, upon recommendation of Justice Minister Andrew Swan.

"Terrorism within British Londinium is now become a reduced threat," Mr Swan said. "And, whilst we must be constantly vigilant, that needn't mean that we sacrifice vital civil liberties at the same time."

But Conservative MPs remain infuriated at this latest action by the LDS. "It is unfathomable, to me, that the People's Sovereign Republic is so willing to sacrifice security," stated Conservative Leader Sarah Halifax in a speech before the Senate. "Look at ViZion! Look at Cazelia! Look at Calizorinstan! Look at Lord Sumguy! None of those nations would have even the slightest hesitation in attacking us, and we should not give those nations any more allowance in killing innocent Londinians."

However, Consul Sir Alistair Davidson replied by remarking that "after a fortnight, and if reasonable purpose remains for further detention, police forces are capable of petitioning the courts for an extension."

The new detention policies are slated to take effect in July 2013, and do not extend to Londinian extra-territorial provinces such as Sumatripte, Pirandello, Syria, New Guinea, Tasmania, or New Londinia.

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BL implements "scorched space" programme

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A long abandoned space observatory, Skywatcher, has been converted by the Ministry of War into an orbital weapons platform, loaded with immense amounts of explosive devices.

"It is high time that the People's Sovereign Republic prepares to wage war on a twenty-first century battlefield," Minister of War Elliot Crompton said. "Skywatcher will be an 'astronomically' powerful organ of combat in the cosmos."

The new weapons platform will work by detonating violently over a hostile nation, showering the space above it with deadly debris, which will not only destroy satellites in orbit, but prevent the launch of future satellites.

"In space, even a paint chip can be deadly," a Londinian Space Agency (LSA) official said. "Imagine what a giant shard of metal would do to a nation's telecommunications networks."

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SIS creeps out of the shadows

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The Londinian Secret Intelligence Service, a division of the Ministry of Intelligence, has launched its first ever advert, in an attempt to forestall predictions of fledgling recruitment.

A full page colour advertisement ran in this week's issue of The Financier, the popular newsmagazine, featuring a montage of various images, including the organization's headquarters in Kensington, planes, weaponry, computers, satellites, and exotic foreign locales. The advert also prominently features the fictional SIS agent Charles Frost, the subject of a long-running movie and novel series.

The SIS has been shrouded in secrecy since its inception in 1921. Indeed, the organisation was not even officially acknowledged to exist until just over a decade ago. But the agency wishes to gain itself the image of an egalitarian group, rather than a place that recruits only from the elite universities of Kensington, Amalfi, and Novoli.

The advertisements state that the SIS is "the PSR's first line of defence against foreign threats" and that they need "people possessing a wide variety of skills".

The MoI (Ministry of Intelligence) website provides further details regarding the hiring process. All applicants must be Londinian, healthy, and capable of clearing various background and security checks.

The site also warns applicants to inform only spouses or close life partners of their decision to apply, as "unscrupulous individuals" could use such information to extort potential employees.

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Sumatripte First Minister visits BL

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First Minister of Sumatripte Antonius Key, the newly elected leader of the tiny freed colony, visited the city of Kensington yesterday on an official state visit.

Mr Key received a warm welcome at Kensington International Airport from Londinian Foreign Minister Cecilia Belladini.

Reports indicate that they toured Greater Kensington, viewing such landmarks as Sir Alistair Davidson Square, Kensington Rendezvous Casino, the Arch of Victory, and Historic Kensington.

Later that day, Mr Key was received by the Consul himself at Kensington Palace, where they discussed a variety of issues.

"The Consul and I were discussing the future of Sumatripte, and how British Londinium would play a role in our future," the First Minister remarked to the press.

The Londinian government has promised to allow for unrestricted trade between BL and Sumatripte, in addition to providing the new nation's scant military forces with equipment and training.

Also, the Londinian Exchequer agreed to permit Sumatripte to open a small mint within their borders to print denarii banknotes and coins, under the supervision of the BL government.


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Ex-Consul Phillip Sinclair found guilty

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Ex-Consul Phillip Sinclair has been convicted with endangering the state and conduct unbecoming a government leader, and faces nearly fifteen years in a federal penal institution.

The first charge arises from Mr Sinclair's conduct in his last year as Consul, in which his actions - including the embargo against the Sovereign League and searching and seizing Skyian vessels - are believed to be key causes of the Freekish Democide.

The second charge arose from the fact that Mr Sinclair, throughout his administration, was caught disgracing the office of Consul. For instance, in March 2009, he was caught having sex with a prostitute inside his office at Kensington Palace, and in 2008, Mr Sinclair shot an unruly Socialist MP in the foot.

Mr Sinclair, continuing to stand by his innocence, has managed to appeal the Primary Criminal Court's decision all the way to the Supreme Court, which upheld the sentence.

He will begin serving time by the end of the month. Parole will be permitted after the seventh year of incarceration.

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Quick guide: Conflict in Britzkium

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The conflict in the Londinian colony of Britzkium has claimed hundreds of thousands of lives throughout the course of its nine hundred year long history.

In the modern era, the conflict between British Londinium and Britzkium revolves around the two issues of race and religion.

Some, such as the Coalition for Londinian-Britzki Unity, call for the territory to remain under BL's control, citing mutual economic and social dependency.

But others, especially the Christian Nationalists, feel that Britzkium can afford to "dispose of their cruel Londinian masters" and form an independent nation.

Origins

Around 1200 CE, the large and powerful Londinian army swept into the large peninsular region of Britzkium. The starkly atheistic and European heritage of British Londinium still stands in harsh contrast to the Christianized Pacific Islander natives of Britzkium. From the onset, the differences lent themselves to a brutal occupation and subjugation of the region.

"The Londinians are like dogs," wrote one of the more educated natives in 1341. "Scourge of the gods. The farm overseer, today, he beat a girl - one at the tender age of thirteen, no less - senseless, stripped her bare and ravaged her in front of the workers...the women protested - they were raped naught but an hour later."

The tension eventually sparked the 1937 April Insurrection, in which Britzkium briefly wrested its independence away from a British Londinium distracted by advancing Japanese armies. It was recaptured in 1944.

The Fracas
The Fracas (the term used by historians to denote Britzkium's de facto second rebellion) began amidst the counter-culture of the early 1970s. Most point to an incident that occurred on 6 January 1971 as the catalyst for the Fracas. On that date, several platoons of Londinian soldiers stormed an Anglican church on the grounds that it harboured a dangerous anti-government terrorist.

Riots erupted throughout the city, with hordes of furious protesters clashing violently with government forces.

The semblance of home rule that had been granted by Kensington over the course of the past twenty years was immediately revoked. Britzkium was ruled by a combination of martial law and parliamentary decree.

A Carnival of Mayhem
From the seventies up until the late eighties, the violence seemed nowhere close to abating. Members of the lethal Christian Nationalist Army (CNA) conducted strings of attacks on Londinians throughout Britzkium and in British Londinium proper, whilst the government responded with even more draconian policies.

The warfare quickly devolved into a vicious cycle of 'lex talionis' retribution. Some CNA militants even reported to the LBG years after that, at the time, the exact purpose of their organization was a mystery to them - that they joined only because a friend of theirs had died.

A hope for peace

Various peace talks with the CNA led to a fairly stable arrangement with the government by 1999. Bombings dwindled and the government restored limited home rule to the area.

But the problem remains that the CNA still craves Britzki independence dearly, and, with the colony being the 'breadbasket of the Republic', British Londinium is steadfast in denying that freedom.

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Piscataway's underground city

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Piscataway, a sleepy little town a few kilometres away from San Fili, certainly wouldn't seem out of the ordinary - except for the fact that it's underground.

Over the past five years, the entire city has been slowly dismantled...and rebuilt fifty feet underground.

Stores, homes, schools, hospitals, even streets have been relocated into this vast subterranean complex. Out of Piscataway's tens of thousands of residents, only the farmers will need to leave the complex on a regular basis.

The new Piscataway - part of the Home Office's Future Living Solutions Programme - is being hailed by many.

"It's really exciting," commented Mayor George Reynolds. "We're at the forefront of a totally new way of life."

"Piscataway, to me, symbolizes a new vector of growth for this crowded nation," said Home Office Minister Robert Wilson. "If Piscataway proves successful, we can use the designs in our Oickoidian and Britzki colonies - and maximize the amount of land we can use for agricultural growth."

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Oickoidia makes World Cup bid

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The arctic and isolated Londinian colony of Oickoidia is preparing to join the 37th World Cup alongside the BL team - a first in Londinian history.

Many of British Londinium's colonies, including Syria and Britzkium, have petitioned the Ministry of Culture, Media, and Sport (MCMS) to send football teams to the world's greatest competition, but each time their requests were denied.

But Oickoidia, according to one MCMS official, is a special case. "Oickoidia has been a loyal possession," the apparatchik commented. "Never in the two hundred years of Londinian occupation have the Oickoidians rebelled. Besides, they're extremely efficient in their mining operations. Think of it as...a reward of sorts."

A competition is currently being set up to design the team's first uniforms.

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NBMA opens four factories in Birziminia

Northern Baltic Military Arms, a leading manufacturer of weaponry, has opened four factories in the southern city of Birziminia.

The factories specialize in so-called 'Central European' arms, especially Swiss and German weaponry. The Sturmgewehr 90 (SIG SG 550) will be feature weapon manufactured at the plants, though Walther P99 pistols, MG3 machine guns, and Remington 870 shotguns.

"I'm really excited for these new facilities," said Business and Enterprise Minister Olivia Quinn. "They'll not only help the economy and provide thousands of locals with employment, but they will give us a cheap, easily-accessible source of weaponry, both for civilians and the military."

The facilities are slated to begin full-scale production on Thursday, once the MoBE finishes its inspections.

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Ministry of Provincial and Colonial Affairs unveils new scheme

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Provinces and Colonies Minister Marcus Iotapianus

The MoPCA unveiled a new plan today to grant nearly 450,000 people residing in the so-called 'People's Sovereign Empire' citizen status.

The programme grants the right of abode, or the freedom from immigration control, to those individuals residing in various Londinian overseas territories, dependencies, and colonies with 'good behaviour' and a 'demonstrable loyalty to Kensington'. A person who has the right of abode in British Londinium does not need permission from the government to enter the country and can live and work there without restriction.

At the same time, the MoPCA white paper regarding future plans for the People's Sovereign Empire has implemented a completely new set of policies, including a revamping of the colonial nomenclature.

Now, possessions such as Oickoidia, Britzkium, and Sumatripte have been classified as 'Londinian overseas territories'. That term will be extended to all areas under Londinian sovereignty on a more-or-less permanent basis. But areas with a majority population of Londinians - New Guinea and Syria, for instance, will also be extended the status of 'colony'. The possession of Ghassan has been re-termed a 'dependency', as it has a semblance of internal government and a degree of internal freedom - though it still depends on Kensington for support.

"We do not expect this change in status to result in any substantial number taking up their right to live in the People's Sovereign Republic."

The territories themselves would be required to make a number of changes in their laws, Mr Iotapianus said.

All the possessions would be required to meet in full international standards on money laundering, transparency, law enforcement co-operation, and independent financial regulation by the end of the year.

Mr Iotapianus later commented that "if the right-of-abode-rewards scheme is a success, we plan on expanding it and refining it in the future."

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Ann St Croix elected by Federal Convention

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Ann St Croix, a prominent member of the Conservative Party, was elected to the Presidency, a post left vacant after the Lassiter scandal.

The new centre-right president was officially sworn in at a formal ceremony at Rosenberger Palace, followed by a formal parade through the streets of Kensington.

Miss St Croix, age twenty-nine, has called for national unity, patriotism, and transparent and accountable government.

"I intend to utilize the presidency to keep Parliament and the Consul accountable to the people," she said in her inaugural speech. "But, at the same time, I do not intend on hindering or significantly interfering with the working of Parliament...I shall recognize Parliamentary sovereignty at all times."

Interim President Jonathan Fontana, Mr Lassiter's vice president, was at the ceremony. His last official act was to hand over the 'Executive Pen', a golden ink writing instrument used to symbolize the checks and balances vested in the Presidential office.

Whilst the voting record of the Federal Convention is sealed for six more months, many members have chosen to comment to the press.

"Even as a Socialist [Party member], Miss St Croix seemed like the perfect choice to me," one Senator remarked. "Young, youthful, exuberant, intelligent - a hit with the people, essentially. And, to be honest, her status as a Conservative only furthers the system of checks and balances."

Ms St Croix is slated to officially meet with Consul Sir Alistair Davidson on Thursday.

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Guide to Londinian business etiquette

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With droves of foreign businessmen and diplomats flocking to British Londinium, the LBG, Ministry of Foreign Affairs, and Ministry of Business and Enterprise have collaborated to produce this helpful guide for individuals traveling to Kensington.

1. Dress and overall appearance are very important: businessmen spend time finding just the right suit, and women are typically decked out in fashionable, feminine outfits and tasteful jewellery. Londinians have a tendency to notice shoes straight away—keep yours clean and in good shape. The same applies to hair, briefcases and ties.

2. Always be prompt. The best rule is to turn up early for appointments, but only to present yourself at the specified time.

3. A handshake is the most common form of greeting, followed immediately by the swapping of business cards. These should be offered and received with both hands, with the writing the right way up for the recipient to read. If possible, have cards printed with English on one side and Volscian on the other.

4. Londinians, especially the Kensingtii, are very title conscious, and many will expect to see extra letters in front of or behind your name. It is usual for PhD graduates to use their “Dr” credential on business cards. Most people should be addressed with their title and family name. If a person does not have a professional title (consul, president, doctor, etc), then simply use “Mr”, “Madam”, “Mrs” or “Miss”, plus the family name. Using first names is generally reserved for close friends or lovers.

5. Remember that the PSR is one of the most diverse and culturally liberal places in the world; jokes about race, religion, gender or sexual preference will probably not be well received.

6. When entering a taxi, the most important person sits in the middle with an acolyte on either side. Never open or close a taxi door—the driver will take care of that.

7. Kensington is a "nerd-friendly" place. Admiration, not mockery, will greet those who know every line of the latest Parliament Act or have memorised the European Declaration of Fundamental Human Rights. Scorn or condescension will greet bluffers: if you're out of your depth, be honest—your companion is probably an expert.

8. Business lunch is a crucial part of life in Kensington, which overflows with good restaurants. Set aside at least two hours for such a meal.

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Conservatives push for second Cazelian invasion

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Conservative leader Sarah Halifax

Sarah Halifax has renewed calls for another invasion of Cazelia, a nation invaded earlier this year after a failed attack on Londinian soil.

"Cazelia still remains an oppressive, unstable, highly dangerous nation," Ms Halifax said before the Senate yesterday. "To this day, the Hasley family, which, to me, is the root of Cazelia's problems, remains at the helm - and they must be eliminated."

Most Conservatives and even some Socialists are in strong favour of more military action in Cazelia.

"President Hasley continues to be belligerent, and continues to threaten the People's Sovereign Republic - that's enough reason for anybody to support re-invading," commented one Socialist MP.

However, Consul Sir Alistair Davidson is steadfast in rejecting such proposals, and has persuaded President Ann St Croix to veto any legislation for military action in Cazelia outright at this juncture.

"Regardless of how unstable Cazelia is, that particular third-world nation is no longer our concern," Sir Alistair said to the press. "Let ICCD and ViZion handle the situation - let them squander their resources and personnel in that hellhole."

For now, the People's Sovereign Republic maintains strained, though cordial, relations with Cazelia.

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Londinian government unveils secret food storage vault

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Deputy Consul James Azzopardi formally 'launched' the new Alexander Saakashvili Victual Repository, built into the rocky escarpments of Lake Chelsea.

The vault houses enough food to feed nearly two billion people for over a year in the event of an extended blockade of the Insula Londii.

In addition, the Saakashvili Repository houses caches of all plant seeds capable of growing in British Londinium.

"The fact that British Londinium is increasingly reliant on our trade networks for food is painfully obvious," Mr Azzopardi stated. "The Saakashvili Victual Repository will serve as our national insurance policy against starvation in times of war."

The Londinian armed forces have built an additional military installation near the entrance to the vast facility, and will maintain a constant military presence.

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New flag design unveiled

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The new Londinian Standard

The Ministry of Culture, Media, and Sport (MoCMS) unveiled the new BL flag today, which has been in the works since 2010 to replace the flag created in 2003 under James Swanner's direction.

The new flag features a diagonal damask stria, flanked by two smaller white stripes, and a large five-pointed star in the upper left hand corner on a black field.

"This new flag is a symbol of the new direction that British Londinium is following," Minister Chloe Yuhijiad said to the press.

According to the MoCMS white paper regarding the new design, the black background represents victory, whilst white symbolizes death to enemies of the PSR, and red symbolizes the socialist ideologies of the government, with the star being symbolic of the "light of civilization" shining brightly from British Londinium.

Many in British Londinium support the change of flags.

"I think it looks much nicer, much more modern," one Londinian commented. "And, the old Standard didn't make much sense. It was a cross. I think only five percent of people are Christian here...the new flag is more inclusive."

Already, the new Londinian Standard can be seen fluttering above major government buildings, such as LBG headquarters and the Houses of Parliament.

The Swannerian flag has now been illegalized, and police have been ordered to arrest any individual still found producing them.

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Davidson under fire for north-south divide

Consul Sir Alistair Davidson recently came under fire from an independent policy institute for failing to close the north-south economic divide.

The Conservative-affiliated group, the Foundation for Economic Equality (FEE), found that economic growth in Kensington and other parts of the Bay Area experienced growth rates of nearly six percent - whilst the south and east of the PSR had growth of merely three percent.

"Sir Alistair's government must make financial equity a priority in their policy decisions," the FEE's report said. "...and failure to do so is a betrayal of this nation's ideals - the ideals of a nation that Sir Alistair was instrumental in founding."

The FEE also stated that average income in Kensington and the surrounding area was nearly 17,000 denarii, compared to only 13,000 denarii in the rest of British Londinium.

Minister of Business and Enterprise Olivia Quinn denied the report's claim, stating that "the statistics presented were skewed and taken out of context."

"The Ministry, indeed, the entirety of the Socialist government, is dedicated to ensuring economic equality as much as possible under the current regulatory framework," Ms Quinn said to the LBG. "That has not, and will not, change under the Londinian Democratic Socialists."

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Transcript: Questions to the Consul - 1 December 2012

Sarah Halifax (CP, Pembroke Springs): If the Consul would kindly list his engagements for the day.

Sir Alistair Davidson (LDS, Nyquist; Consul): Before doing so, I am confident that the Senate wishes to join me in sending our most sincere congratulations to a Dame Olivia Azzopardi for the LBG for winning the prized Londinian Journalistic Excellence Award; she continues to be the pride and joy of the LBG, and continues to enrich the media that our citizens receive daily.

This morning, I had meetings with ministerial colleagues and others. In addition to my duties in Parliament, I shall have further such meetings today.

Phillip Cunningham (LDS, Croydon): As the Consul may already be aware, thousands of illegal immigrants manage to enter British Londinium each year. In 2011, for instance, nearly seven thousand illegal immigrants, namely from Olmedreca and Aliquantus, snuck into the country. How will the Government respond to ensure the continued security of our borders?

Sir Alistair Davidson (LDS, Nyquist; Consul): An excellent question, Mr Cunningham. Home Office Minister Wilson and I have drafted a comprehensive visa reform plan that will make rooting out illegal immigrants and verifying the identity of incoming individuals exceedingly easy compared to the current system. Reforms focus around biometric visa cards - to facilitate collection of this data, all Londinian embassies will be equipped with a dedicated visa application centre. This will enable the Home Office to ensure potential terrorists cannot enter the country, and to quickly verify the status of a questionable individual's visa. A completed version of the act will reach the Senate by the end of the month.

Sarah Halifax (CP, Pembroke Springs): I join the Consul in congratulating Dame Olivia - she is a credit to the quality of the Londinian media.

Last week, the Foundation for Economic Equality released a disturbing report addressing the North-South divide. Will the Consul confirm that he is endeavouring to address this economic gap?

Sir Alistair Davidson (LDS, Nyquist; Consul): What I can confirm is that the Ministry of Business and Enterprise is looking into the think-tank's report and will release an analysis within the week.

Sarah Halifax (CP, Pembroke Springs): I take that as a no, Consul. It is alarming to me that the founder of the so-called People's Sovereign Republic is not more concerned about inequities in the system. Let me be more specific. Will the Consul allow Kensington and its surrounding area to accrue wealth as the south and east suffer?

Sir Alistair Davidson (LDS, Nyquist; Consul): Ms Halifax, please bear in mind whilst you fiercely attack the Government that the salary figures presented by the Foundation for Economic Equality were averages. Averages that are certainly padded by the high salary that the leader of the Conservative Party garnishes.

Sarah Halifax (CP, Pembroke Springs): I asked a simple question, Mr Davidson. I repeat, will the government allow Kensington to thrive as the rest of British Londinium falters?

Sir Alistair Davidson (LDS, Nyquist; Consul): I cannot help the fact that Kensington serves as a nexus for international trade. It is an inescapable fact that wealth inevitably concentrates in certain areas. But the south and east, by no means of the imagination, are poorer.

Sarah Halifax (CP, Pembroke Springs): It fascinates me that people continue to vote for your party, considering you can hardly provide a straight answer. The Consul says that equality is a priority, but does he deny the report saying the average salary of an Easterner or a Southerner is at least a thousand denarii lower than that of a Kensingtii?

Sir Alistair Davidson (LDS, Nyquist; Consul): If you wish to alleviate that, Ms Halifax, I propose that you cut your salary, and call for the slashing of corporate salaries throughout the country. See where the Conservatives and their die-hard capitalist tendencies will be politically then.

William Salvai (Lib Dems, Ayr): Consul, on behalf of the thousands of workers now employed at the new nuclear plant the government financed, may I thank you for your unequivocal support for the industry at the Dispatch Box last week? Will he join me in urging this Parliament to continue to support the industry?

Sir Alistair Davidson (LDS, Nyquist; Consul): The Government's preliminary view is that nuclear has a future role in providing our homes and businesses with the low-carbon energy that we need. Nuclear energy has served Kensington, Amalfi, and Novoli well.

Disgleirio Castillo (Eco-Syn, Wæclingacæster): The environment, amidst the various day-to-day concerns of the Government, seems to have gone ignored. What will the Consul do to ensure the protection of our environment?

Sir Alistair Davidson (LDS, Nyquist; Consul): The environment is a priority for this Government. We only have 2,344,858 square kilometres of land on which to live - and each part of this country ruined due to poor environmental practices is a part that we cannot utilize properly. Our first and primary method of dealing with the environment is the construction and maintenance of an extensive nuclear power network. Already, since 2010, we have managed to make everywhere north of Ayr completely reliant only on nuclear energy. I intend on continuing with dismantling existing oil and coal plants in favour of nuclear reactors.[/font]

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To boldly go where no phone has gone before
By Dame Olivia Azzopardi
LBG World correspondent

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"That'll be ₰1.59," the cashier at Burger Khan says to me after I place my order. I quickly whip out my cellular, press a few buttons, grab the greasy fast food, and walk out the door - and nobody raises an eyebrow.

Paying by mobile phone might sound like the whimsical imaginings of an overly excited Popular Science writer - but, believe it or not, the Government is taking steps to make cellular commerce a reality.

The effort is beginning with mobile phone banking, or 'm-banking', as the Exchequer calls it.

"M-banking will revolutionize the way Londinians go about their daily lives," commented Chancellor of the Exchequer Adélaïde Pryce. "Mobile phones can create virtual accounts in virtual banks. You can look up your m-bank balance and issue instructions through text messages. Security can be ensured through multiple passwords."

The Parliament, at the request of Ms Pryce, recently ordered all Londinian banks to make their systems mobile phone compatible. Within a month, it is predicted, any Londinian can access a domestic account via mobile phone - anywhere in the world.

Concurrently, the Ministry of Business and Enterprise is enacting regulatory reform to ensure that businesses and mobile companies make m-banking technology accessible to all and usable anywhere.

The Ministry recently ordered that cell phones have m-banking software and are capable of being used as debit cards at businesses around the country.

"Mobile phone transactions will be very beneficial to businesses," one MoBE spokeswoman said during a press conference. "Businesses can better track customer purchases and habits with this technology. Marketers can better hone their advertisements once provided with data collected from mobile phone commerce."

Already, some businesses have put m-banking compatibility into place, months before the final deadline.

The Kensington Metro, for instance, has made it possible to buy tickets and subway passes through mobile phones. Users buy their ticket on the internet and it is delivered to their mobile phone in the form of a barcode, which can be scanned through the gate.

Popular Londinian fast food chain Burger Khan has made all of their locations compatible with cellular debit cards.

The deadline for businesses and mobile manufacturers to implement m-banking reforms is in February of 2013.

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