Kubra
11-05-2007, 04:25
SYMBRTU
Stuff You Must Be Retarded To Use
In todays modern world a nation must have cutting edge technology to win war. You must outclass your opponent technologically to achieve true victory over your enemies and be a true ruler. Well we wont offer you an of thaat, but piss off your enemies with our not so cutting edge, possibly poison, and most definitely damaging to the environment products! You'll probably regret buying it, but who cares! We get the money! Buy or stuff!
Nuclear air
Basically, we bottled some air from a nuclear fallout zone *crosses out* happy fun playhouse and have put it on the market. Create your own nuclear fallout zone in the discomfort of our own home! It's about 50 cents for a 2 litre bottle, so stock up!
Nuclear Apples
We found some apples at the place, too. They glow, it looks nice. They also smell like happy. So, now we're selling it to unsuspecting customers! We have no idea what the do, why not find out for only $1.00 per apple?
sewing needle guns
We are disturbed by the presence of a country that has manifested inflatable tecnolog into bulletpoof shelters. So, we have devised counter measures! Defeat these inflatable buildings with the sewing needle gun! The shelters are capable of withstanding blows with full sized rifle cartridges, but they're inflatable, so we think sewing needles will work! maybe! Only 10 bucks a gun!
Ice Cream Warheads
Brainfreeze has long since made our heads hurt. Well wh not harness that hurtyness for military uses introducing our line of ice cream war heads, the pinnacle of ice cream warfare! They come in all shapes and sizes, as well as an desired flavour. With this, you enem will have a headache from eating the ice cream that is contained within the warhead! Yo will be victorious! Eventually... But hey, with a price of $1.00 to $100 000 000 depending on size, it can probably cause massive brain damage, aas well as gingavitis.
Pelvis gun
Your prayers to Satan have been answered! Introducing the new pelvis gun, a full sized 50 caliber anti-material rifle that hooks up just in front of your crotch! When you fire, more than 1 thing will die, if you catch our drift. Recommended for maale use only, for the sheer hilarity. People are advised not to wear any sort of crotch protection! ONLY $99.99 and all your crotch protection items.
Giant Psycotic Carrots
Yea uh, we're not entirely sure how it happened, but uh, somehow the carrots grew to a large size and went on killing sprees. All hoped seemed lost, then we discovered if we gave this guy 100 gold coins he could tame the carrots for us. Then he told us if we put a horse on a stick, it wold move faster! So, here they are. As long as you're over level 60 ((WoW reference)) you should be able to use them. They also fit in moden missile silos! What fun! It's 100 000 001 bucks if you buy it fresh, but you can have day old ones for only 10 bucks!
Glowing Green Stuff
It's some glowy green stuff we found, we have no idea what it is. We also dont know it's effects, so it's only $1.00 per 2 litres and can be sold to minors. Remember, if anyone asks what gave you tentacles, it wasn't our products! maybe.
Stuff You Must Be Retarded To Use
In todays modern world a nation must have cutting edge technology to win war. You must outclass your opponent technologically to achieve true victory over your enemies and be a true ruler. Well we wont offer you an of thaat, but piss off your enemies with our not so cutting edge, possibly poison, and most definitely damaging to the environment products! You'll probably regret buying it, but who cares! We get the money! Buy or stuff!
Nuclear air
Basically, we bottled some air from a nuclear fallout zone *crosses out* happy fun playhouse and have put it on the market. Create your own nuclear fallout zone in the discomfort of our own home! It's about 50 cents for a 2 litre bottle, so stock up!
Nuclear Apples
We found some apples at the place, too. They glow, it looks nice. They also smell like happy. So, now we're selling it to unsuspecting customers! We have no idea what the do, why not find out for only $1.00 per apple?
sewing needle guns
We are disturbed by the presence of a country that has manifested inflatable tecnolog into bulletpoof shelters. So, we have devised counter measures! Defeat these inflatable buildings with the sewing needle gun! The shelters are capable of withstanding blows with full sized rifle cartridges, but they're inflatable, so we think sewing needles will work! maybe! Only 10 bucks a gun!
Ice Cream Warheads
Brainfreeze has long since made our heads hurt. Well wh not harness that hurtyness for military uses introducing our line of ice cream war heads, the pinnacle of ice cream warfare! They come in all shapes and sizes, as well as an desired flavour. With this, you enem will have a headache from eating the ice cream that is contained within the warhead! Yo will be victorious! Eventually... But hey, with a price of $1.00 to $100 000 000 depending on size, it can probably cause massive brain damage, aas well as gingavitis.
Pelvis gun
Your prayers to Satan have been answered! Introducing the new pelvis gun, a full sized 50 caliber anti-material rifle that hooks up just in front of your crotch! When you fire, more than 1 thing will die, if you catch our drift. Recommended for maale use only, for the sheer hilarity. People are advised not to wear any sort of crotch protection! ONLY $99.99 and all your crotch protection items.
Giant Psycotic Carrots
Yea uh, we're not entirely sure how it happened, but uh, somehow the carrots grew to a large size and went on killing sprees. All hoped seemed lost, then we discovered if we gave this guy 100 gold coins he could tame the carrots for us. Then he told us if we put a horse on a stick, it wold move faster! So, here they are. As long as you're over level 60 ((WoW reference)) you should be able to use them. They also fit in moden missile silos! What fun! It's 100 000 001 bucks if you buy it fresh, but you can have day old ones for only 10 bucks!
Glowing Green Stuff
It's some glowy green stuff we found, we have no idea what it is. We also dont know it's effects, so it's only $1.00 per 2 litres and can be sold to minors. Remember, if anyone asks what gave you tentacles, it wasn't our products! maybe.