NationStates Jolt Archive

OOC: Closed LOL

JAREDCOHENIA

"Those guys in Whyatica are fags." The Premier spoke. "We must nuke them!"

"Nuke them?! Why?!"

"Because they are fags!"

To: Whyatica

u guyz r fags were gonna deklaer war on u

From: Adm. Soda Popinski

"I do say, what the fuck?" the Emperor of Whyatica said, looking through his regal monocle and drinking a swig of beer.

"Sir, perhaps the Jaredcohenians are drunk again. Admiral Soda Popinski has a brother named Vodka Drunkinski, after all."

"Well, we shall use our stockpiles of highly advanced nuclear--" he burped, and took another swig, "weapons on them."

"Yes, my Emperor, but I have one question."

"What is it?"

"Why the monocle and the beer?"

The Emperor paused for a second, and looked at his aide, who immediately melted into a puddle of beer.

"Never ask questions."

FROM WHYATICA!
TO THE DRUNK COMMIES!
wtf we nuke you first

Admiral Soda Popinski was swigging down 200 proof alcohol, the kind you can only find in laboratories. The label said "PURE ETHYL ALCOHOL" yet Popinski didn't care.

He looked at a button, stating "DOOMSDAY: DO NUT PUSH UNLESS YOU ARE EITHER STUPID OR DRUNK". Popinski fell into one of those categories, pushing it. A giant phallic shaped missile fired out, headed towards Whyatica.

Unknown to the Whyaticans, it was filled with candy and Gatorade.

Admiral Soda Popinski was swigging down 200 proof alcohol, the kind you can only find in laboratories. The label said "PURE ETHYL ALCOHOL" yet Popinski didn't care.

He looked at a button, stating "DOOMSDAY: DO NUT PUSH UNLESS YOU ARE EITHER STUPID OR DRUNK". Popinski fell into one of those categories, pushing it. A giant phallic shaped missile fired out, headed towards Whyatica.

Unknown to the Whyaticans, it was filled with candy and Gatorade.