NationStates Jolt Archive

This is the NEW new new home of the Lake Erie tropical Islands thread
Thread III http://forums.jolt.co.uk/showthread.php?t=394333
Thread II http://forums.jolt.co.uk/showthread.php?t=305400
Thread I http://forums.jolt.co.uk/showthread.php?t=276351

This thread contains the happenings of The LETI region, our region has been around since 2003...

Other helpful links.....
NS WIKI
http://ns.goobergunch.net/wiki/index.php/Main_Page

LETI Region Economy
http://nseconomy.thirdgeek.com/nseco...opical_Islands

Lake Ontario Tropical Islands
http://forums.jolt.co.uk/showthread.php?t=281458&page=1

Nimzonian Cival War thread
http://forums.jolt.co.uk/showthread.php?t=378879

WWII Leti Thread (Telegram WWII Council of Clan for info)
http://forums.jolt.co.uk/showthread.php?t=363012

Bulger 15 Regional Parliament
http://forums.jolt.co.uk/showthread.php?t=289289

Manarth is Commissioning an Air Craft Carrier
http://forums.jolt.co.uk/showthread.php?t=279144

Proposal for LETI/LOTI Nuclear Treaty
http://forums.jolt.co.uk/showthread.php?t=305405

Treaty of Fei Fong Wong signed
http://forums.jolt.co.uk/showthread.php?t=303418

Radio Broadcast from Council of Clan
http://forums.jolt.co.uk/showthread.php?t=302750

Grand Opening of The LETI National Garden
http://forums.jolt.co.uk/showthread.php?t=286199

The Spiders Web.... (Closed RP)
http://forums.jolt.co.uk/showthread.php?t=295475

Weapons Tests
http://forums.jolt.co.uk/showthread.php?t=280612

Wilhelm Shakeson presents "The Kingdom of Erie"
http://forums.jolt.co.uk/showthread.php?t=282896

LOTI/LETI Summit on Erie-Ontario Canal and Lock System
http://forums.jolt.co.uk/showthread.php?t=283499

Orion Pirates Hijack Manarthian Airliner!
http://forums.jolt.co.uk/showthread.php?t=282141

The WORST amount of GODMODDING in NS
http://forums.jolt.co.uk/showthread.php?t=290523

Manarthian Theater Siezed by Terrorists (Invite only RP)
http://forums.jolt.co.uk/showthread.php?t=313736

Assasination atttempt on Emperor Romanov
http://forums.jolt.co.uk/showthread.php?t=311817

LETI Gameplay Debate
http://forums.jolt.co.uk/showthread.php?t=305399

The Secret Library (Closed RP)
http://forums.jolt.co.uk/showthread.php?t=306429

Manarth to host "Symposium on LETI/LOTI Terrorism"
http://forums.jolt.co.uk/showthread.php?t=324850

LETI Wedding--Emperor Ed and Empress Carolyn
http://forums.jolt.co.uk/showthread.php?t=310752

Counterpoint cease fire conference. LETI/LOTI Nations
http://forums.jolt.co.uk/showthread.php?t=335422

Andaluciaen Weapons Test: LETI only
http://forums.jolt.co.uk/showthread.php?t=350132

LETI/LOTI Canal conflict
http://forums.jolt.co.uk/showthread.php?t=348516

Tensions on the Rise in the Arctic (Invite RP)
http://forums.jolt.co.uk/showthread.php?t=312692

LETI Peace Conference
http://forums.jolt.co.uk/showthread.php?t=379929

*The Great Council of Clan Fleet's Iowa, Huron and other assorted Battleships except for the Great Lakes class sail from the Harbors of Glasgow and Kent into the Open lake and from there their crews abandon ship and B-1 after B-1 streak low at the fleet firing Harpoons, Tomahawks, Soviet series AS-4 and AS-6 missiles. the ships are on a preprogrammed Computer system to utilyze their anti-missile countersystems and take evasive manuevers. Several ships collide with each other at nearly 30 knots while others are struck with barrages of missiles. Except for an unlucky few that collided and were hit by missiles, most of the fleets remain afloat but damaged, some on fire as blazing wrecks while others are unscathed. Several Submarines close in and sink the last few Iowa's because they lacked substantial anti-torpedo protection. But mostly the enourmous surface ships required several dozen solid hits by larger anti ship
missiles before they succomb the bombardment*

CoCNN states the reason for such large scale target practice was that these ships were enourmously wasteful of taxpayer money and very difficult and expensive to maintain and operate and with the recent peace deals with Edenstein and Co. There is no need to maintain such a massive military.

CoC challenges the Edenstein Navy to take similar Disarmament measures(large numbers of older aircraft carriers and escorts are also being retired along with nearly all Los Angelas class Nuclear Attack submarines) Large numbers of Army units are disbanding with their older equipment becoming targets or being put into long term storage.

"I hope this will bring about a new era of peace in the Lake Erie Tropical Islands" says Prime Minister Vladmir Ululanov(2nd gen Immigrant from Edenstein)

After watching the CoC military destroy itself the “immigrant” population of MadderMike begin to assemble a hodge-podge salvage fleet. The “immigrants” some of whom are third or fourth generation MadderMikeians are refered as “immigrants” due to their proclivity to live on the surface and farm (usually cash crops – recreational pharmaceuticals).

The leader of the “immigrants” Mike Anderhohl speaking to the hastily assembled news mob: “MadderMike is always looking for new sources of high quality steel. Our scrapyards are completely safe. The workers get paid by the pound, it encourages high productivity”

Michelle Winsom MMN news “Mr Anderhohl we have heard rumors of deplorable conditions in your scrap yards. Why don’t you let us examine the scrap yard to allay these rumors.”

“Ah Ms Winsom all you really want to do is try to unionize the workers which is why we can’t let you into the scrap yard.”

“Mr. Anderhohl the continuous blight of oily black smoke emanating from your yard has the citizens of MadderMike concerned. There are reports of birds dropping from the sky and three headed toads wandering around the outskirts of your yard. What do you say to that.”

“Ms Winsom, you are a beautiful woman would you like to have dinner with me tonight?”

Michelle Winsom MMN news “That is our report for tonight.” <Primping herself>

*COC Naval vessels move into the targeting zone and declare that it is off limits to civilian vessels, other than from Edenstein to verify the destruction of the vessels.*

So maybe four headed 7 legged toads, it will reduce the mosquito population. :)

Mike Anderhohl calls his advisors into the chart room of his 300 foot yacht. "Gentlmen, CoC is being a bit difficult in this salvage operation. It is obvious that these vessels will be abandoned and they fall under the Flotsom Jetsom provisions of International Law. However, who have we been bribing in Edenstein to let us onboard the inspection vessels? Send some of our finest stuff to West Palm to see if they have anyone in CoC on their payroll. This is a delicate operation which will require bribes galore."

*A proposal is sent to Edenstein informing them that once verification of the destruction of the vessels is complete, a seperate salvage operation will commence to strip the vessels of valuable eletronics and the Nuclear fuels*

*Emperor Ed sits in his office, joined by him is Lt. Zofia and Rumpsfeel, patched through to a television on the wall viewing the top down carnage that the automated CoC fleet is doing to itself*

Ed: So, Zofia, your telling me that they didn't strip anything off of those ships?

Zofia: Thats correct, those ships all still hot.

Ed: *Turns to watch what used to be an Iowa burst into flame* So what about the radiation from the reactors?

Zofia: Being dumped into the lake I suppose....

Ed: Well.... its a sign of good will, and generally, signs of good will by CoC are generally good until something else pulls it down the drain. *He clicks his mouse and pulls up a list of active and non active fleets.* Deactivate fleets 12, 17, and... *looks* 5. Those fleets contain our oldest ships, decomm them immediatly but strip everthing out of them before they are sent to the bottom.

Zofia: *writes down the info*

Ed: Also deactivate the 352nd and 91st bomber wings.. lay them out in the wastes so their satelites can see it. Thats all...

*They both stand up, salute and walk out of the office*

Ed: *pushes his buzzer* Jane, get me who ever is in charge of MadderMike

New West Palm's Council of CEO's meeting, 2/6/07:

Chairman Jablowski (CEO - Palm Co.): I hearby call this meeting to order. All in attendence?

Councilman Alvarez (CEO - Alvarez and Sons & Mercenaries and More LTD.): Present.

Councilwoman McMillan (CEO - Manarthian Remnents): Present.

Councilman Smith (Deputy CEO - Gasco, Smith, and Openheimer Holdings): Filling in for CEO Gasco.

Chairman Jablowski: The CEO for Mythic Entertainment and Automotives, Councilman Harrison, is not present, nor is his representative. As such, any decisions reached will not be binding for him.

Any new business?

Councilwoman McMillan: The immigrant community of Maddermike is requesting that we place diplomatic pressure on the CoC in an effort to allow their salvage teams a means to claim the scrap iron from the recent naval tests. We've decided to go ahead and place pressure on them, provided Maddermike salvagers supplies us with a 25% cut of the net profit, as well as hiring Manarthian Remnents security and cargo vessels to assist in the transport. Obviously, MR hirings will be pre-profits, but we expect to make nearly 40% of the total value of the iron, without the need to build any additional refinement plants.

Councilman Alvaraz: And why do you bring up your expectations for profit here? How does it concern us, other than as a means of generating envy?

Councilwoman McMillan: I was hoping you'd ask. In order to generate the necessary pressure, we will need to make the CoC understand that we are willing to claim these pieces of scrap metal in the name of Maddermike's immigrants, and by extention, the greater corporate entity of Maddermike. This being the case, we will need to hire the mercenary forces of your corporations, in order to have a force... sufficient enough to convince the CoC that we are on equal footing. Certainly an old friendship between my people and theirs will not be sufficient at this day and age.

Councilman Smith: And our compensation?

Councilwoman McMillan: 10% each of the total profits for our venture, as well as any private amounts you're able to raise from the Maddermike or allied interests on your won. Should the conflict escalate into a hot war, each group will recieve a percentage of the prize money based on their participation, with 5% of each group's total prize money being kicked back to the immigrants, pending their approval.

Chairman Jablowski: I see nothing wrong with this.

Councilman Smith: I will have to check with Mr. Gasco, but it sounds like a promissing venture.

Councilman Alvaraz: I will discuss this more before I finalize anything. I propose a meeting of our CFOs to discuss the likely profits of this venture.

Councilman Smith: Agreed.

Chairman Jablowski: I agree as well. We will send an invitation for Mr. Harrison's CFO as well. Any other items on the agenda, Councilwoman McMillan? No? Good. Then the meeting is at a close.

Mike Anderhohl and his staff finsh a nice meal of feral donkey roast, glowing green "nuked" potatos, purple green beans, and baked MadderMikian Alaska which set fire to the overhead. "Gentlemen, we have been able to contact West Palm and set the wheels in motion with them, any agenda items to discuss?"

Mike O'holic head of the farm co-operative, "Boss, dem ships 'posed to have nuc-a-lar reactioners in dem, I don' know ifin we want to mess wid dem."

"Mike, Mike, Mike, we already have an advanced order for steel from the Amalgamated Tunnel Boring corporation. If the steel glows in the dark it will help them dig their tunnels now wouldn't it?"

"Ya boss, dat why you de boss and I am de flunky."

And you are dumb as a post.

Mike McMike shipyard boss, "Mr. Anderhohl, we heard there might be some of that chum-chum steel on them ships, if we get some of that we could sell it for a small fortune. I just don't know how to cut it up right now."

"Don't worry McMike, we will use the Manarthian expatriots to figure that out."

With that they all settled down to enjoy their "consumables" and managed to munch their way through another roast.

*Undersecretary Aloysha from the Provisioning and Reclamation department steps off of his gulfstream onto the tarmac of the main airport in the capital of MadderMike, he had been briefed on the traditions of the nation, from the "Flak Barrage" to the unnatural obsession with guns and armored SUV's. He put the Dragonskin Body Armor on underneath his suit so it made him feel a little more comfortable. Looking towards the terminal he see's what looks like a fairly important man walking towards him.*

Aloysha: Are you Mike Sly?

*The man waves then pulls a handgun from under his suit, he shoots Aloysha in the kneecap* Welcome to Maddermike Undersecretary!

Aloysha: *Screams bloody murder and falls to the ground, he quickly remembers his customs training, pulls his baretta out from his coat and quickly shoots out both of the other mans knee caps.

Aloysha: ARE YOU THE REP I'M SUPPOSED TO TALK TO ABOUT RECYCLING?!

As the ever-present little repair bots scurry around fixing the damaged knees replacing torn up bits with various exotic alloys and artificial cartilage, Mike Sly welcomes Undersecretary Aloysha to MadderMike.

As they walk to a nearby coffee shop Mike notices the creaking and groaning of his repaired knees, somewhat like the creaking of a backhoe digging a ditch in the early cold morning. Mike knows from experience that the noise will soon die down.

Over a cup of very smooth 'immigrant' coffee, Mike explains how his cousin Mike Anderhohl would like to have a representative onboard one of the inspection vessels scheduled to review the recent disarmament of CoC. He further explains how he would like Undersecretary Aloysha to help clear the way to begin salvaging the destroyed CoC navy.

When Undersecretary Aloysha explained the possibility of contamination from the Nuclear Reactors Mike just explained he had that worked out.

Mike showed his gratitude with a suitcase with about $150,00 USD and two match quality Ruger 9mm.

Just then a furious gun battle breaks out apparently over cold coffee. When the dust settled there wasn't enough for the little repair bots to fix so they scooped up the biologics and put them in a nearby dumpster.

OOC: as an aside ed, Dragonskin body armor is both heavier than Interceptor Body Armor and will only stop a round from a 0% angle of impact, when greater angles of impact are used smaller and weaker rounds have been known to come apart and push their way between the scales, while Interceptor has a solid sappy plate that will stop an AK-47 round. (I have an Interceptor Body Armor vest sitting in the trunk of my car right now ;) )

Press Release from New New Kent in former Counterpoint territory.
As a further step in disarmament, the COC army creates a Demilitirized zone moving land forces 100 miles away from the COC/Edenstein Border and airbases back 400 additional miles.


The COC Navy has also employed bacteria to clean up the reactors of the sunken warships and the water around them, while also removing all spent and unspent nuclear fuel, all Critical eletronics and communication systems are in the process of being removed.


We are now bidding on a contract to sell the rest of the salvage rights for those vessels.

As Levanta recovers in the aftermath of its latest zombie outbreak, promotional brochures are distributed to foreign travel agents in an effort to improve the non-existant tourist industry.

Visit Stunning Levanta, the World's Most Post-Apocalyptic City!

Stay in the five-star Encephalophage Hotel, where the first zombie outbreak occurred in 1978. Enjoy the house speciality of chilled monkey brains and grapefruit! See the claw marks still in some of the historic oak panelling!

Take a trip on Levanta's modern skyrail, and see the famous Blanca Plaza, where former president Victor Munz was assassinated by a cyborg death squad on live television! See the Rubble Technology Centre, where Levantan scientists are already at work on the next Dark-tech project which will surely bring the city to the brink of armageddon once again! Visit a local bookmaker and place a bet on which form the next apocalypse will take - odds are good it'll be a death plague or cyber revolt! You could be a winner!

Or, if you prefer a more down to earth tour, take a trip into the El Kiva suburbs, and see Levanta's native street life first hand! Warning: Area not covered by Corporate Security. Carry a firearm and at least 50 rounds at all times.

Finally, finish your visit with a trip to the renowned Levanta Maglev Races, where daredevil pilots race at speeds of over two hundred miles per hour! We guarantee at least one fatality per race, or your money back!

So come to the glittering modern metropolis of Levanta where, if you're lucky, the apocalypse may come to you!

Mike Bluenose Assistant to the Undersecretary of Useless Protocol, was engageing in his daily six hour phone call to his wife. "Honey I think I have found the perfect vacation spot listen to this take a trip into the El Kiva suburbs, and see Levanta's native street life first hand! Warning: Area not covered by Corporate Security. Carry a firearm and at least 50 rounds at all times."

"Wow, just what we were looking for, a quiet out of the way place to sharpen our marksmanship skills."

"Yup, I am going to book a trip as soon as I finish my paper work. See you later, sweetie." <Click> "Miss Paper, time for my "massage".

Giovanni De Strang, secretary of state for Culture is reviewing the latest tourism figures with his advisors.

"El Kiva seems to be a popular attraction for the MadderMikians," he notes, "According to these figures, they're even doing an excellent job of keeping law and order there."

"Perhaps there is an opportunity here," suggests Sully O'Hare, De Strang's chief lackey, "There are still large sectors of the city and the wastelands we have yet to reclaim from the zombies and booster-gangs. Perhaps we could place some target ads in MadderMike offering package tours to these hotspots."

De Strang's eyes light up, "That's perfect. Instead of hiring defense contractors, we can just send tourists there, and they'll pay us. Call it a Zombie Safari, or something, and offer them exotic weapons and ammo."

"I'll get right on it," O'Hare smiles.

*Empeor Ed looks at the operations map for LETI and see's the new nation of Levanta placed on the map. He turns to the gathered group of Admiral's, General's and other personel.*

Ed: So... who are they?

Admiral Utenka: Sir, I don't know but I can have the 9th and 10th fleets shipped out tonight..

Ed: Well... no need for that yet...

General Stola: Sir, think this is a CoC ploy?

Zofia: Well, the only thing we can see is Mikians flocking to their crime ridden cities for urban safaries...

Ed: Well, obviously we need to find out more about this nation before we win their hearts and minds or divide and conquer for that matter.
*nervous chuckling comes from the assembled room*

Zofia: Who are you going to send?

Ed: Well you of course...

Zofia: Sigh, I'll pack my bags...

OOC: Hehe, I was watching future weapons on Discovery Wayne and saw the dragonskin, looked neat, and of course they are not going to show the armor failing on national television... but it taking a grenade blast was pretty impresive.

*Earlier that day: Council of CEO's Meeting*

Councilman Harrison: The best cource of action is to hold two of our corporations in reserve. This seems like a winning proposal, but we didn't get to where we are today by refusing to diversify. Yes, we could stand to make some money from a closer allegiance with Maddermike and their immigrant population, however what if the CoC actually attacks? We would need some of our corporations still standing to cover the loss.

Councilwoman McMillan: I... see. I disagree. It's in our best interest to present a united front, as that will give our venture the greatest possible chance of sucess. You can see the projections in front of you...

Councilman Harrison: No. I see Manarthain Remnants' projections, not Mythic Entertainment and Automotives'. I see absolutely no reason why this would be in our interest with the risks involved for all of us. I am willing to sit the operation out, for the same fee as joining, but seeing as how that will not be viable, we will take 2.5% of your net profits for the venture instead.

Councilman Alvarez: I agree with Mr. Harrison. We'll sit it out, and you shouldn't be complaining. Doesn't this mean more money for you, should you suceed?

*Later that day - Board of Directors Meeting, Manarthian Remnants*

CEO McMillan: This is very, very bad, as I'm assuming you realize. Our profit making from this venture relied on all of the corporations backing us. As it stands now, we're forced to go ahead, with Mythic and Alvarez looking over our shoulder, waiting for us to fail. The only question is, are the CoC willing to eliminate their one true friend in West Palm, in favor of a few of the fair weather variety.

CFO Vandershale: I'm not sure it's in their best interest. Most likely, this will involve all of us at a negotiating table, and us earning vastly smaller profits than we expected. Honestly though, I think that would be prefered to any of the other outcomes. Tomas, Tomas, and Everson are still viable for a Major seat, and I'm guessing Mythic would just love for one or more of us to fall so they can put their allies into the top spot.

CAO Killian: Alvarez are a bunch of flakes too, turning on us once Mystic comes back to the table. I've worked too hard getting our bloc together, just to have Mythic peel them away one at a time.

Dept.CEO Wainright-Cauldwell: Ought we let Alvarez know what we think? It seems like someone has some undue influence with him... Who is next in line there?

CAO Killian: Smart money is on CFO Marco Alvarez, but his cousin VP-Export Goods Juan Alvarez-DeMico has enough of a following to give a board meeting vote a good run.

CFO Vandershale: We've never been in good with Marco. We're too new, and despite his age, he's as old money as they come. Eldest son of CEO Alvarez, his father and mother were from two of the oldest families in the corporations. Related by blood to Mr. Harrison. "Grandmother" Juanita Alvarez-Uljoa would likely step aside as Dept-CEO for him. Juan would be better for us, if only because his competition with his cousin put him at odds with Mythic.

CEO McMillan: Do you suppose taking him out would put Alvarez back toward our direction?

CFO Vandershale: It'd be expensive. I'll get on the numbercrunching.

CAO Killian: From a marketing standpoint, it'll push them firmly into our camp, especially if we let Juan know where he got his sudden promotion to CFO from. I'm sure there will be a large shakeup, weakening Alvarez and Sons, but not enough for any of the big five to step in and aquire. Plus, it'll let CEO Alvarez know he needs to tread a bit more lightly from now on.

CEO McMillan: Good. Ms. Vandershale, when you have the paperwork drawn up, if we have a 50% or greater chance of success, I want this opperation run. And I don't want to hear any more about it until I read about Mr. Alvarez having some sort of tragic accident our papers. Got it?

All: Yes, ma'am.

CEO McMillan: Good. Now, how much could we make by exports to that new nation... L-whatever?

Levanta Network News

Preparations are underway for the first diplomatic visit to Levanta in nearly three decades! Levantan officials will be meeting with dignitaries from Edenstein to establish formal relations. As a result, security forces are cracking down on potential troublemakers well in advance of the visit.

"We're setting up roadblocks along all the major routes between Corporate Sector and the suburbs," said Captain Vasquez, of Executive Incomes, "My job is just to keep the scum bottled up until the dignitaries leave. Some of the booster-gangs pack some pretty heavy weapons and cyberware, so we're not taking any chances."

*Camera zooms out to reveal several artillery emplacements*

"So if you don't have a corporate sector pass, I suggest you stay at home this week."

Preparations for the actual reception are well underway at Levanta's newest and most modern skyscraper, 112-storey Tower One, where the dignitaries should be arriving via the rooftop helipad. Our reporter had this to say on the preparations, "The elevator's out of order, and I'm not walking up a hundred flights of stairs."

In other news, the City was saved from complete destruction today by three mysterious female vigilantes, who battled a giant robot in downtown El Kiva. An eye-witness described them as having pink hair and jetpacks. Thank you, mysterious jetpack-ladies! Levanta owes you once again!

*Manarthian Remnants Board of Directors Meeting*

CEO McMillan: They're cutting us out, the lousy $%#*ers! "Go contract through the CoC, Maddermike. We don't care about our long time allies, not one little bit!" *#&$ing *$&holes!

Dept. CEO Wainright-Cauldwell: What should we do then? We can outbid Maddermike's refugees, but then we'll have to sell it to them at a loss. We certainly can't afford to purchase any new naval hardware or refinement plants.

CFO Vandershale: We could bid them up, but that only punishes Maddermike. The bigger problem is that the CoC are no longer benefitial to our bottom line, and we need to dael with that. We need to make them benefitial to our bottom line again, and everyone knows three basic things reguarding the CoC: Threats don't work. They don't bluff. They don't lose largescale wars.

However, a smallscale escalation may be sufficient to make a profit, and to show we're not amused. Even someone as bullheaded as the CoC Premier wouldn't like to see an ally tossed aside so easily. After all, they're surounded on all sides by Edenstein now. They need us.

Dept-CEO Wainright-Cauldwell: What sort of escalation do you have in mind?

CFO Vandershale: Only the most profitable and risk free of all military ventures... piracy! We sell off some of our better privateer vessels, say our Silencer Class subs, to a dummy corporation under our direct control. On paper, they are independent, so as to avoid any messy complications later on. They hit CoC targets of oppertunity. If they are sunk *shrugs* we write them off. If they suceed, and they will at first, we "buy" their scrap, and sell it back to the CoC at inflated prices, since they'll probubly want it back.

CEO McMillan: A good plan. Helps our bottom line, and gets those hunks of junk out of our drydocks. I like it.

*Deep Water Silent Security Company*

Assets:
Main Assets:
7 Silencer Class Special Forces Submersibles
14 Night Hawk Class Helicopters
350 "Commando" Mercenary Teams
437 Naval Mercenary Crew

Secondary Assets:
39 Silencer Class Special Forces Submersibles (Scrap and Parts)
Docking Facilities located in New West Palm (Former Eastern Detroit)
~1000 "Civilian" (they aren't paid for by booty) engineers/mechanics/dock workers/ect

CEO Dennis "Commodore" Neff

*Off the coast of Catapillo, the E.C.S. Juggy's Delight, a container ship steams towards a foreign port via the locks. Captain Aiehahbe looks over the bow of the ship, first mate Johanne Frankenfurter stands at the helm*

J: Captain, what exactly are we hauling?
A: Mainly adult toys, lubrication, bagels, blank cd's, compact cars.
J: Wait... never mind I'm not gonna ask.... do we ever carry anything useful?
A: Well we do have that cache of munitions the government contracted us out to carry.
J: Why did they stick it in with a shipment of sex toys?
A: Keep a low profile I reckon?
J: I suppose...
A: *looks over at a random sailor* Anything on the radar?
S: Just some random small ships.. looks like a store is brewing...
A: *on the comm* Batten down the hatches we may be in for a store.

*The ship goes about its buisness and prepares for an oncoming storm.*

*Onboard the DWSSCS Port Hrabe (Formerly the MRS Port Hrabe)*

President of Ship Operations: Got a container ship ahead. Might be a good target.

VP of Sonar: Nothing using actives anywhere nearby. Got a passive, but it looks like a whale. We should be clear if we want him.

VP of Ship Operations: Nope. Edenstein flag. It's a no-go.

President of Mercenary Ops: Really?

VP of Ship Operations: Yep. Big penguin on the side. Unmistakeable.

President of Ship Ops: Oh well, can't be helped. Tell us if you see a Mikian or CoC ship. Wake me for 1st watch if nothing noticable happens.

*ships set up to recover the reactors and nuclear materials of the sunken vessels sail into the quarintine zone and as they fill their loads into their specially shielded containers they sail out once the loads are full.*


*They sail out without anything more than a single FFG frigate (Oliver Hazard Perry class) escorting 3 or more vessels as they make their way back to the CoC*


*at Ft. Meade in the CoC an anaylst in the New West Palm Beach section is gathering SIGINT, ELINT and HUMINT data together while the Recon office is looking at Satellite Recon photo's*

*the Analyst comes to a startling conclusion and calls his supervisor*

Analyst: Colonel!

Colonel: what is it Jeff?

Analyst: Sir, it appears that some of the corporations are refitting several of the Silencer class subs to make them operational and have put at least 3 out to sea.

Colonel: Jeff, why would they do that?

Analyst: it appears they may be making a play to knock out the Premier in an effort to destabilize our efforts in protecting our sunken vessels in the quarintine zone

Colonel: Michelle, Get me the minister of Defense, send this up to the MNI and label it Critic.

Michelle: Yes sir.


*The Minister of Defense hears the info relayed over a secure Telephone*

Minister: Yes Colonel, it does look that way to me as well, thank you.


Minister: Dave, get me the Chief of Staff of the CoC Navy, I want to recall all Ohio class type vessels to port including our own Silencers and order all available ASW Assets to start patroling our Coastline. Also give the order that if any Ohio class vessel is detected with Machinery matching the ones we sold to Manarth back in the old days is to be forced to the surface if possible and sunk if necessary.

*the Minister of Defense also gets word that the President wants a measured Response, with the possiblity of bombing the fleet facilities holding the drydocked Silencers while they are being stripped*


IF they want to use our own vessels against us, let them not have any spare parts.




*3 B-2 Spirit Bombers drop a single 2000lb JDAM bomb on each of the Silencer sitting in dry dock*

*Empeor Ed looks at the operations map for LETI and see's the new nation of Levanta placed on the map. He turns to the gathered group of Admiral's, General's and other personel.*

Ed: So... who are they?

Admiral Utenka: Sir, I don't know but I can have the 9th and 10th fleets shipped out tonight..

Ed: Well... no need for that yet...

General Stola: Sir, think this is a CoC ploy?

Zofia: Well, the only thing we can see is Mikians flocking to their crime ridden cities for urban safaries...

Ed: Well, obviously we need to find out more about this nation before we win their hearts and minds or divide and conquer for that matter.
*nervous chuckling comes from the assembled room*

Zofia: Who are you going to send?

Ed: Well you of course...

Zofia: Sigh, I'll pack my bags...

OOC: Hehe, I was watching future weapons on Discovery Wayne and saw the dragonskin, looked neat, and of course they are not going to show the armor failing on national television... but it taking a grenade blast was pretty impresive.


OOC: There is still a lot of debate about dragonskin armor, if i were to wear a set in theatre and got killed or injured my $400K Life insurance policy will be null and void and I wouldn't be eligble for VA Benefits if I had survived.

In the aftermath of the bombing, it becomes apparent that the Deep Water Silent Security Company is facing financial ruin. 25 of their drydocked submersibles are ruined beyond hope of salvage. The docks, as well as the remaining submersibles are irraditated and unservicable for the moment.

The B-2s themselves get away after the attack, due to the WPB air defense companies wasting time shopping for a worthwhile price for shooting the planes down.

The citizens of West Palm have a lot to talk about the next day. Mostly it's about the complete inefficiency of the CoC military: "Why blow up valueble assets that could be siezed for later." "What are they doing hitting empty sub pens? Do they enjoy wasting bombs on frivolous destruction." "Who did they even hit again, and what on earth did they do?"

The Manarthian Remnant is livid, decrying the CoC as an enemy of the Bottom Line, and asking all of the consumers to purchase Anti-CoC lines of clothing, backpacks, lunchboxes, toys, automotives, and even very hastily written short novels. Mythic, who's own business had been disrupted in the area by stray bombs (one was incorrectly keyed to the neighboring Mythic docks) and the radiation, blaims Manarthian Remnents for the damage, attempting to hold them accountable.

Alvarez sits on the fence.

In the aftermath of the bombing, it becomes apparent that the Deep Water Silent Security Company is facing financial ruin. 25 of their drydocked submersibles are ruined beyond hope of salvage. The docks, as well as the remaining submersibles are irraditated and unservicable for the moment.

The B-2s themselves get away after the attack, due to the WPB air defense companies wasting time shopping for a worthwhile price for shooting the planes down.

The citizens of West Palm have a lot to talk about the next day. Mostly it's about the complete inefficiency of the CoC military: "Why blow up valueble assets that could be siezed for later." "What are they doing hitting empty sub pens? Do they enjoy wasting bombs on frivolous destruction." "Who did they even hit again, and what on earth did they do?"

The Manarthian Remnant is livid, decrying the CoC as an enemy of the Bottom Line, and asking all of the consumers to purchase Anti-CoC lines of clothing, backpacks, lunchboxes, toys, automotives, and even very hastily written short novels. Mythic, who's own business had been disrupted in the area by stray bombs (one was incorrectly keyed to the neighboring Mythic docks) and the radiation, blaims Manarthian Remnents for the damage, attempting to hold them accountable.

Alvarez sits on the fence.


*The Intial Bomb Damage Assestment returns and The Minister of Defense is looking it over*

Well the spreading of radioactive material over a wide area is unfortunate, but that leaves only 3 submarines out to conduct a raid, and with the pulling of 75% of our ASW assets back to defend our short coastline, there is no way that any submursible can come within 200 miles of our coast.


Now can someone please explain to me the social structure of New West Palm Beach?

*all of the aides just shrug*

Shit.

The Levanta Seaways container ship Exxon's Revenge is steaming out of port heading for the locks. Officially, it is carrying a large consignment of SmartPants (tm) to the chilly Pharaoh Islands, where loincloths have recently gone out of fashion. In a somewhat unoriginal scene on the bridge, Captain Hazelwood and First Mate Valdez are discussing the ship's cargo.

Hazelwood: "Set a course through international waters near CoC. We need to offload the secret cargo before we reach the locks."
Valdez: "What exactly is in the secret cargo?"
Hazelwood: "Toxic waste, spent reactor rods, mutant stem cells, the usual, and a whole container of failed Mike Oldsmobile clones."
Valdez: "Are we dumping them, then?"
Hazelwood: "Yep. With all the CoC jetsom floating around, we'll just be throwing our trash into the mix and letting CoC take the rap if anyone finds it."
Valdez: "Don't you think it'll be pretty blatant it's ours? Who else clones deceased world leaders for pay-per-view pit fights?"
Hazelwood: (shrugs) "Well, the landfills are already overflowing, and probably causing half our problems in the first place. Any international outcry won't be as bad as another mutant horde wandering in from the wasteland."

*Just then, gunfire breaks out onboard the ship.*

Hazelwood: (rolls his eyes) "Sounds like the obligatory zombie-outbreak-on-the-isolated-container-ship has started early. I'll take the helm, go and start handing out chainsaws to the crew"

The Exxon's Revenge continues on its course.

/snip

OOC: This can only end in tears, and I don't mean from the zombies. Go easy on the new guy, Wayne.

Also OOC:

Hey kids, I bet you're all wondering about how on earth New West Palm functions as a boarderline Anarchy of corporate entities vying for political power.

Here's how it works.

The five largest corporations, based on pretty much whichever corporations are felt to threaten the others most at any given moment, have their represntatives meet regularly. They make descisions that are, in theory, binding by full consensus. In practice, all the corporations do as they please, with the meetings acting as a reminder that they should be working together toward the same goal, profit.

The five largest corporations at the moment are as follows:

*Manarthian Remnants (Biggest and newest corporation, made up of what remains of the United Republics of Manarth)
*Palm Co. (2nd largest, and most respected in reguards to solivency)
*Mythic Entertainment and Automotives (Contains a disproportionate amount public security industry, as well as "seasonal" mercenary hires)
*Gasco, Smith, and Openheimer Holdings (Smallest mercenary holdings of any of the major corporations, but substantial economic holdings, including about 60% of the bank and insurance industries)
*Alvarez and Sons & Mercenaries and More LTD. (Relatively small, but brought in as a compromise, as they weren't a dummy corporation of either Manarthain, Palm or Mystic.)

Other major corporations:
*White Corp. (Featherstones America's remnants. Still owns most of the canal. Substantial offshore holdings.)
*Magic Enterprises (Dummy corporation of Mythic. They've been pushing for it's membership every time another corporation in the Big Five goes under.
*J.J.Peterson (Dummy corporation for Gasco. Hired primarily by Gasco to run their mercenary business.)

In the Northeast Underground Submarine Pens on the Southern Coast of MadderMike

Mike of Mike and Mike Shipping, MadderMike’s Prime Minister for Life, and Protector of the Faith is inspecting his newest acquisition diesel-electric-fuel-cell submarines, the Lunacy class. He is accompanied by his concubine and the true leader of MadderMike Em.

Mike “These subs look small next to those over there, Em.”

Em “Yes Mike they are smaller, those subs over there are the leftover CoC submarine fleet CoC put here for storage years ago.”

Mike “I don’t see many sailors on those ships.”

Em “ They are in the pubs it is 10:00 AM.”

Mike “How do they pay for their drinks?”

Em “Er they do favors for us, training sub sailors and things like that.”

Just then a hapless rat emerged from under a dumpster, every living being in close proximity began to fire at the rat. Lead was bouncing from steel beams, concrete walls, and the surface of submarines. The rat was just a puddle when things quieted down.

Mike “Well that was fun, when are we going to send these babies out?”

Em “Tonight they will exit and begin exploring the range of CoC ASW off the coast.”

In the luxury yacht of Mike Anderhohl

“Mr Anderhohl we are getting satellite images of a large container ship heading into the CoC restricted area.”

“*@#$@% someone is trying to ninja us, call uncle Mike Capone see if he can "accidentally" fire one of the new MadderMikian Zig Zag cruise missles at that intruder.

Wacki-pedia entry for MadderMikian Zig-Zag missile

This very capable missile designed by second generation basement dwelling engineers, is stunningly effective. It is nearly impossible to detect and even harder to hit even with CIWS systems. The main problem with the missile is the designers more familiar with video games tend to ignore the laws of physics. This sometimes causes catastrophic failures on impossibly tight maneuvers. The warhead has been known to separate from the propulsion module and detonate enroute. The leftover propulsion unit self destructs when it detects the absence of the warhead. As long as there is a large explosion most MadderMikians are happy with the result.

Colonel Fredrich Hiemlick newly “elected” leader of E-C-N calls a meeting of his cabinet.

Colonel Fredrich “Gentlemen, and you too Lady McBeth, our bank reserves are getting low, we haven’t gotten any assignments in ages. Lady McBeth you are the head of the assassination coalition what do you have on the horizon?”

Lady McBeth “As you know Freddy the West Palm dudes have just been bombed by some unknown entity, probably Edenstein. I have several agents in West Palm and they are reporting unrest among the lesser Corporations. They are reporting cracks in the voting bloc.”

“Good, good, try to figure out who has money to burn and wants some selective “pruning”.

Exxon's Revenge, heading into CoC restricted area

Captain Hazelwood and the survivors of the crew are making their way towards the nearest life raft. They are all splattered in gore and look like they are attending an audition for the next Texas Chainsaw Massacre remake.

"How do you tell if someone is turning into a zombie?" asks first mate Valdez.

"Mainly they start trying to eat your brain," says Hazelwood, peering down the next row of containers, "All clear, lets move."

"There must be some early signs," Valdez persists.

"Well, the first sign is that your fingernails darken. Why do you ask?"

"No reason."

As they are lowering the raft over the side of the ship, a missle streaks out of nowhere and hits the ship, causing a massive explosion. Exxon's Revenge starts to sink, causing a major spillage of SmartPants. The crew get in the raft just in time.

"I wonder what that explosion was." Hazelwood ponders, "Oh well." He looks at the map, "Hmmm... it's going to be a long ride, and we don't have a radio. Maybe we'll get lucky and someone will pick us up."

One of the crewmen looks at Valdez, "Hey Valdez, did you have those gloves on a minute ago?"

"Ha, yes, of course!" says Valdez, perspiring, "Say, is anyone else hungry?"

*Lieutenant O'Doull operation commander of the Hawkeye gets a message over the intercom from one of his radar operators, PO2 McCaine*

PO2: Skipper, Vampire inbound, it just sprang out of the water, likely a submerged launch.

O'Doull: What is its vector?

PO2: It appears to not be heading for any of our ships, but it looks like its heading for a merchant vessel that just crossed into the quarantine zone. the Exxon Valdez's Revenge. Looks like impact in 25 seconds.

O'Doull: Shit, get the log book and see where it is coming from and its cargo

P02: Looks like "solid waste" thats all it says its carrying, and its destination is in Panama, it sailed from Levanta.


PO2: Sir it looks like there is an impact and the radar contact of the Revenge is getting weaker.

O'Doull: Ok I'm going to get an Orion over there to see if there is any survivors and get Search and Rescue from the CSS Battle of the Canal

OOC: Mike I completely FORGOT about those subs. lol.

PO2: Skipper, don't you think we should task an Orion over to the launch site and see what launched it

O'Doull: Remember your place Petty Officer, and besides, the ship was violating the quarantine zone, it was likely one of our subs.

PO2 :*grits teeth* YES, sir.

Admiral McLeod is in command of the quarantine vessels and has one of the few remaining big gun warships in the CoC arsenal. The Massive 70,000 Ton CSS Great Lakes and he is currently chewing out all of his picket vessel captains.


"Gentleman, how in the HELL did an entire CONTAINER SHIP get past our pickets INTO the zone. And which submarine fired upon an UNARMED CIVILIAN vessel without warning it. I want answers people"

*a promising young Commander who is in command of an Arghlie Burke class destroyer who was on the far side of the Quarantine from all aspects of the incidents speaks up*

Sir, in all fairness, no Rules of Engagement nor any solidified chain of command has been forthcoming, and as these are international waters, limiting access is tricky at best. And as for the sub, just yesterday my aviation compliment was reassigned from my ship and many other ships in the fleet to patrol our homewaters. As well as almost all of our Frigates with Sonar Tails are back patroling our waters. We have so many gaps in our sonar coverage its amazing they haven't resorted to flat out attacking our ships and trying to force us out of the quarantine.


*Admiral McLeod is taken aback by the criticsm on his quarantine and almost dismisses the Commander on the spot and then remembers his frustration with higher command when was a younger officer and begins to admire this young commander and makes a mental note to keep track of this officer in the future and do what ever he can to help his career along*

"Thank you commander, and that will be all, you may return to your commands"

The life raft has been floating for a while, and the survivors have all passed out. Hazelwood drifts in and out of consciousness. He thinks he can see a light flashing somewhere above.

"Jesus, is that you? Buddha? Xenu? Hey guys, don't fight over me..."

*the CH-46 spots the Lifeboat after being vectored in by a P-3 Orion and hovers right in front of the boat and gently settles in the water with its rotors still turning and the ramp at the rear comes down and a boat comes out to pull the lifeboat alongside the Sea Knight and pull everyone on the lifeboat aboard to fly back to the Battle of the Canal for medical treatment and evaluation*





*Meanwhile back at the New Kent Naval Base a board of admirals are searching to find a new commander for the CSS Connery a Ticonderoga guided missile cruiser when they get a Memo from Admiral McLeod recomending Commander Muen for promotion to Captain and a good command. The Board of Admirals agrees and Commander Muen is sent his transfer orders along with a SH-60 to ferry him there*

OOC: V-day. No long drawn out posts for me.

More tomorrow.

*Commander Muen's helicopter lands on the Helipad aboard the Connery, on the way in he noted the 2 AB Destroyers and single Oliver Hazzard Perry Frigate. After he gets off of the Helo there is Admiral McLeod standing their holding a little wooden box and another commander who is probably the EXO of the Connery*


*Muen salutes the Admiral*

Muen: Permission to come aboard sir?

McLeod: Permission Granted Captain, while we're standing here why don't you pin these on*hands over a the old wooden box to Muen who opens it to find it lined with velvet and holding a pair of weathered but still servicable Captain's Eagles*

McLeod: Those were the eagles that were handed to me when I made captain by my fleet commander, and now I am giving them to you

Muen: Thank you sir.

McLeod: This is Commander Digi, your EXO and let us go to your cabin, we have some things to discuss, you can tour your ship later

Muen: Aye Sir.


*Back in the Captains Cabin McLeod briefs Captain Muen of his task force's assignment*

McLeod: Ok Captain, your job is to provide a retalitary capability for the CoC navy while not being as high profile as a Battleship, Battlecruiser or Aircraft Carrier force your carrying a load out of about 25% SM-2 Surface to air 25% TASM's and 50% TLAM Missiles. Now 9 of your TLAM are important Captain, 6 of them have Nuclear Warheads and 3 have are carrying Serin Gas

Muen: Sir, I wasn't aware of the loading of Tactical NBC warheads on warships in the fleet.

McLeod: The Premier wants the capability here, and you are to conduct a presence Patrol for the length of this crisis, always stay in international waters, and remember you do not have friendly air cover. There are some submarines operating in the area but I can't tell you how many and where they are. Now you aren't completely naked, there are a few Carriers that are withing a week's sailing time if things get too hot for you. You will be resupplied with UNREP so there will be no port calls.

The Exxon's Revenge survivors have been brought into sick bay on board the battle of the Canal. They are all still unconscious.

After twelve hours, it seems the only thing wrong with Captain Hazelwood is that he drank an entire hip flask of rum. He is just waking up with a hangover, but the rest of his crew don't look too healthy at all. They are turning unhealthy shades of green, and twitching.

Hazelwood watches blearily, swaying a bit as he sits up. Groggily, he checks his fingernails. They look clean. Then he turns to the nearest member of the sick bay crew and asks, "Where did you guys put my chainsaw?"

Just then, ex-first mate Valdez jerks upright and tries to chew a lieutenant's face off. The rest of the non-survivors follow suit.

Born and Raised in Maddermike, his father was killed in a traffic accident at the age of 12, when their M2 Bradley IFV got accidently hit from 25mm chain gun fire from 2 other Bradley's fighting over a parking space. His mother who was born in Manarth was devasted and emigrated with Dietel Muen to the Council of Clan. Muen always abhored land combat ever since that fatal day, and he decided though that service was a necessary part of life. He attended the CoC Naval Academy at age 16, and after 7 years of intensive study he graduated with a Master's in International Relations and though one of the summers he went through COC Commando Indoc School he decided to continue on achieving his commission and turned down the oppurtunity to become a Naval Commando. He volunteered to serve with the small patrol boat craft, and was serving on a Mongoose MK I (PT-104) that picked up a "Lt. Cmdr Victor Onotov " of the Edenstein Naval Aviation during the first Canal Crisis. Later, having achieved the rank of Lietenant he went to serve on an Oliver Hazard Perry Frigate and was wounded with severe burns when that frigate came under fire in Kusa during the First Kusa Insurrection, and had been evacuated out of the harbor when the nukes went off, he still saw the mushroom cloud on the horizon. He recovered and as a Lieutenant Commander he became the Executive Officer on an Arghlie Burke class destroyer during the great Minor Clans rebellion and served admirably there commanding the vessel when the CO was killed and keeping the stricken destroyer afloat till it got back into port. He was not promoted and has served primarily with Destroyers and cruisers since, becoming an expert in Air Defense until finally he was promoted to Commander and took command of his own destroyer where though they did not see combat action, it became the best run destroyer in the fleet and that brings you to now.


Captain Dietel Muen, A manarthian and Maddermikian by birth, but has served admirably with the COC navy for years and at age 37 is one of the youngest Captains in the CoC Navy's history.

5:00 AM -- Good Morning MadderMike Morning Talk Show no subject is too petty for us to talk about

Ms Michelle Trophy-Wife hostess “Welcome back viewers we have been talking to Mike Irwin the CEO of Urban Safaris Inc.”

“As I was saying Michelle, we recommend our travelers use the old fashioned 1911 colt .45 for the deep interior safaris. The indigenous Levantain zombie will provide a much more enjoyable hunt when you merely blast off large chunks of their bodies.”

Michelle “We have heard that some safaris are using flame throwers, doesn’t this violate the Sportsmanship code of ethics?”

Irwin “Michelle this was in the early days of the safaris when we didn’t know what to expect. The flamethrowers were very effective, in fact too effective and some of our early safaris were almost shut out with no zombies bagged. We now post the international symbol for no flamethrowers on flags around the camp to let the zombies know we are fighting fair.”

Michelle “Well that sounds fair enough, so Mike how is business?”

Irwin “It is booming, in fact we now run four safaris concurrently and have trained a new leader to begin starting the fifth.”

Michelle “That is all the time we have today, tune in tomorrow when our show will be totally devoted to nose hair.”

300 feet deep, 200 miles off the cost of the Council of Clan

Mike Sedonia CO of the MMS Lunacy just finished target practice in the firing range onboard the Lunacy. “Did we just fire a missile?”

LT Mike “Junior” Capone Ops Officer “ Maybe you know how Command likes to take over missions from Michaelgrad.”

CO “Yah you are right, let sleeping dogs lie. Sonar have we detected any CoC ASW activity?

Sonarman 2nd class Mike “ears” Murphy “Sir, there is so much pinging with dippers, sonabouys ASW sonar there is a layer of dead fish floating on the seas.”

CO “Do you think they have detected us yet?”

Ears “Detect us!! Sir there are so many signals in the water they might think there are 50 of us. But they have to have detected us by now.”

CO “Ok, well then dive deep and head home, I can’t wait to see my wife.”

Junior “Isn’t she in your cabin?”

CO “Oh yah, back home it is.”

Background Story:
In the years since the collapse of Nimzonia, millions of refugees have been flocking from the arctic wastes to the colony of Nimzonian Letireijk, to restart their lives. A second refugee group, consisting of a massive fleet of Nimzonian ex- naval and civilian vessels, operated for a while as pirates and traders in the atlantic, before deciding that a new Nimzonian homeland needed to be established. After looting disused military bases in Man Jayen and Psyevdorusskiye, they headed for Lake Erie. They found the Letireijk colony generally in poor maintenance run by Platanese drug barons. Fortunately, the occupying forces were too wasted to put up any resistance, and a Nimzonian military junta led by Admiral Olaf Jakobsson took control of the colony, kicking out the squatters. Nimzonian Letireijk was renamed to Nimzonia, and a new flag was commissioned. Also, 'Immigrant Song' became the new national anthem.

Now:
The massive Nimzonian diaspora continues to flock to the new state of Nimzonia, which is just 5,000 sq. km of land leased from MadderMike. Due to the serious shortage of space, the population are living in massive high-rise apartments in the capital city of Letiburg, which has sprawled to cover most of the available territory.

Admiral Jakobsson calls a meeting of his cabinet to discuss the issue.

"At the rate refugees are arriving, the population will end up spilling over into someone else's country," Gunar Lövborg, secretary of state for foreign affairs, is telling the seated generals and admirals. As one of few civilians in the current administration, Lövborg has kept his place by being one of the few people in Nimzonia who can remember the diplomatic situation before Nimzonia collapsed. "Not to mention, this lease was only for 99 years, so there is an inevitable crisis when that runs out."

"Governor Lagerfelt wanted to annex the rest of Western Manarth from MadderMike," General Borkman remembers, "But we didn't take him very seriously at the time, because he also wanted to invade Narnia, and thought he was beating God at chess with pawn odds."

"I suppose we may eventually be forced to do so," agrees Jakobsson reluctantly, "Or decline into some overcrowded third world nation like El Platano, which I won't even consider, even if it does mean war. But first, alternatives."

"I've tried phoning Main Teepee," says Vice-Admiral Myhre, "But I keep getting their answerphone."

"That's no good. Others?"

Lövborg scratches his chin, "Well, I know our former territory is an irradiated glass-heap, but there are valuable resources still there, like the uranium mines, which will be accessible in a few years when the radiation levels have dropped. We may be able to trade them for living space."

"That will have to do for the time being," says Jakobsson, "General Borkman, initiate a conscript program and start training extra troops in case we need to annex territories by force. Now let's adjourn for lunch."


* * *


Later on, in his office, Jakobsson is drafting a letter to Mike of Mike and Mike Shipping, to initiate negotiations. He has a protocol lackey help him with fine details, like what the correct form of address is. Nobody seems to know what Mike's surname is, but Jakobsson is sure someone will read it, as they are all called Mike.

To: The Most Supremely Pompous Mike of Mike and Mike Shipping, Prime Minister for Life and Protector of the Faith
From: Admiral Jakobsson, acting President of Nimzonia

Nimzonia's population crisis necessitates that we must turn to foreign governments for assistance. Therefore, my government and I wish to enter negotiations for the purchase of territory in the former Western Manarth currently controlled by MadderMike.

OOC: And here I forgot Western Manarth even existed...

IC: New West Palm corporations have been very tolerant of the CoC fleet, mainly because of its irrelevance to their day to day opperations. Most of the people have no clue it's even off thier coast, unless they brought binoculars to the beaches to check the flags of the various warships off the coast.

Manarthian Remnants have begun negotiations with EMC corporation, despite being a non-WPB corporation, for the assassination of CFO Alvarez.

And the Silencer class subs slowly move into possition...

*Admiral McLeod issues a general order to all escorting FFG's*

"Due to the absence of a Submarine threat in the area, Sonabouys and MK 46 torpedos will no longer be carried on the SH-60's and they will be armed with Penguin Anti-Ship missiles and M-60 Door Guns as well as a Designated Marksman if there is one aboard the ship."

Mike of Mike and Mike Shipping Prime Minister for Life and Defender of the Faith, was resting in his secret quarters on the 97th level below the surface of MadderMike. The secret quarters are not for privacy from the populace but from Em his concubine and the true leader of MadderMike. She knows all about it of course but lets him think he has a hideaway. He sorts through the mail his loyal lackey has brought him, mostly gun magazines, requests to attend grand openings, and several offers of marriage. In the mail is one very official looking letter, very unusual one Em usually screens them and two it is not ticking.

Mike tries to bend over to pick up a knife to open the letter but the greater part of his 400 pound mass gets in the way. So he shoots the top of the letter off. It is a letter from some Admiral muses Mike

Nimzonia's population crisis necessitates that we must turn to foreign governments for assistance. Therefore, my government and I wish to enter negotiations for the purchase of territory in the former Western Manarth currently controlled by MadderMike.

Mike vaguely remembers a deal to lease some land in the nation formerly known as Western Manarth. This is something that needs his immediate attention. He calls Em and his Secretary of State Mike Oldsmobile XXVII totally forgetting he is in his secret hideaway.

They of course meet him later that afternoon in the hideaway.

After the normal pleasantries and the obligatory shooting they get down to business.

Oldsmobile “I think we can lease them a lot more land, the land next to New Nimzonia is all farm land, the farmers use tanks to plow and harvest the crops and get a .0001% yield. They would do better just leaving the fields idle and picking what shows up. Plus, the immigrants grow better crops on the surface of MadderMike.“

Mike “Ok settled then we will begin negotiations immediately. Oldsmobile get a hold of them and invite a team to MadderMike to begin negotiations. We can have them stay at the Michaelgrad Ritz-Carleton until they can open an embassy. I think we have been banned from holding events at the Hilton.”

Official Telegram from His Magnanimous Personage Mike of Mike and Mike Shipping Prime Minister for Life of MadderMike

Admiral Jakobsson, acting President of Nimzonia: Admiral we would like to assist your war torn over-crowded nation. At your earliest convenience we would like to begin negotiations. A well protected suite has been reserved in the Michaelgrad Ritz-Carleton for your negotiating team starting next week. We can discuss leasing agreements and the establishment of normal relations including mutual embassies.

Letiburg

A group of kids in hockey shirts are sitting around dejectedly by a large pond, waiting for it to freeze over. It is 31°C in the shade, so there is little chance of that. Just then, a fat red-faced sergeant in full regimental regalia comes marching around the corner, followed by a corporal beating a drum and several other enlisted men carrying the historic flags of Nimzonia, all except the Nieuriejk flag, which is ritually burnt on public holidays. The sergeant marches up to the group of kids.

"Ho there, you lads, who wants to step up and serve his country?" he bellows, "Come join up, and as well as fighting the enemies of Nimzonia, you'll be fighting the girls off with a stick! Every meal's a banquet, and every paycheque's a fortune, when you march with the 30th of Foot!"

This is met with a cheer, and the budding hockey players immediately forget their troubles and march behind the sergeant as he continues on his rounds, singing in a loud and raucous manner.

# # #

Admiral Jakobsson's Office

Admiral Jakobsson and Gunar Lövborg are reading the telegram from Mike of Mike and Mike Shipping.

Admiral we would like to assist your war torn over-crowded nation. At your earliest convenience we would like to begin negotiations. A well protected suite has been reserved in the Michaelgrad Ritz-Carleton for your negotiating team starting next week. We can discuss leasing agreements and the establishment of normal relations including mutual embassies

"Normal relations with MadderMike," Jakobsson muses, "That would be a first. But we could use it to our advantage. They might be useful allies in LETI."

Lövborg nods, "Oh, by the way, General Borkman was telling me how his conscription efforts are going, and training and equipping that many new troops is going to be expensive. But this has given me an idea. Let's see if we can set up a student exchange program, then they will do all the weapons training for us."

"That's a good idea," agrees Jakobsson, "And we can house all their exchange students underground, so it'll free up more living space on the surface."

Official Telegram to Mike of Mike and Mike Shipping

Mr Prime Minister, we accept your offer of accomodation for the negotiations. The negotiation team will consist of Foreign Secretary Gunar Lövborg, Sven Åsheim of the diplomatic corps, and four lackeys. They will be instructed to carry firearms at all times as per MadderMikian custom, and Mr Åsheim will have his minder present unless there is any objection.

A single CoC frigate guards a "convoy" of about 3 container ships. A trio of Silencers slide into possition.

DWSSCS Triumph of the Free Market, DWSSCS Slam a Megaton Energy Drink Today, and the DWSSCS Your Ad Here - (607)555-8842 have been following the convoy at a distance for the better part of a day, as it move slowly away from the Containment Zone. The other ship in their task force, the DWSSCS I Can't Believe It's Not MadderMikian Brand Firearms had been left behind, it's right-most propeller functioning at only 19% efficiency. Finally, the order is given via LOS laser pings to move foward with the opperation.

As the order is given, the three ships fire a spread of torpedos at the CoC frigate, in an attempt to separate it from its friends. Then, with the helicopters of the TFM (1 AA, 2 Troop Carriers) and one of the SMEDT (1 AA) moving on the Frigate, the remainder of the helicopters move in towards the container ships (4 Troop Carriers - 1 / ship, 1 in reserve.)

The plan, should they suceed, is for the ships to move together toward Nimzonian waters (being the closest neutral ports) and dock with the local offices of the Manarthian Remnant corporation. From there, they will sell the contents and ships to whoever will pay the most.

OOC: Just an FYI Kelso, MK 48's have a habit of pinging for new targets once their target was destroyed.



*The lookout on the FCS Axe suddenly sees multiple wakes in the water heading right for the frigate, he yells down to the officer of the watch*

Torpedo's in the water, Starboard bow!


*The Officer of the watch does a quick knee jerk reaction*

ALL AHEAD FULL, RIGHT FULL RUDDER


The sonarman says, "I've got 9 transients I repeat 9 incoming fish"


Officer: Oh bloody hell.


*just then 3 slam into the frigate and the combined 2400lbs of explosive completely blow the frigate apart before there is time for a message to get sent out*


*the Other MK 48's suddenly stop their max speed and sit down for a slower speed and begin actively pinging for targets, three target one of the container ships, another two are targeted at another container ship, and the last one turns around and decides to target the DWSSCS Slam a Megaton Energy Drink Today*


*The two targeted container ships are hit, one lists heavily to port(from two torpedo impacts) and the other with its back broken, breaks in half and slides beneath the waves within minutes*

OOC: I discussed this post with Wayne. Originally, I had only intended to fire a single torpedo from each of my subs, but the above post is too amusing to change.

IC: DWSSCS Slam a Megaton Energy Drink Today - Bridge:

VP Helm Control: Chief, why so many torpedos? Don't you think it's a bit of overkill?

CEO: Nonesense, we've worked it all out. The CoC have sophisticated countermessures in place to stop such things. That they bombed our sub pens means they know we're out here. This way, they drop some chafe into the water, make some maneuvers, and then the next thing you know all the torps are destroyed and their 10 klicks away from their convoy.

VP Sonar Control: Um... Chief?

CEO: What?

VP Sonar Control: We have hits. Pretty much one BIG hit on the Frigate. I don't think it exists anymore.

CEO: You've got to be kidding me!

VP Sonar Control: Our second and third volleys are stopped. They're looking for more targets.

CEO: $*@#! Pull us back!

VP Aircraft Ops: We can't, we're in the middle of our launch cycle. It'll flood the launch bays at best, and likely send us to the bottom.

VP Sonar Control: Torps are moving. Three on Target 1, Two on Target 2... HOLY HELL ONE'S COMMING RIGHT FOR US!

CEO: Helm! Full right rudder! Aircraft! Close those launch bays, and tell helm when you do. Don't waste time relaying! Countermeasures, I want so much chafe in the water Whales think they're on shore! We dive the minute the launchbays are closed. All hands, brace for damage control!

VP Sonar Control: Distance 5 Klicks, closing at 50km/hr

VP Aircraft Ops: We've got an error with the launch bay doors. Our planes are away but the aft door won't close. I think it's jammed.

CEO: How are countermeasures coming?

Mngr Countermeasures: I can't empty our stocks any faster.

VP Sonar Control: Distance 3 Klicks, still closing.

CEO: *$(#, @()#, $#$@!

VP Sonar Control: Distance 2 Klicks. Explosions on Target 1. I can't even see Target 1 any more.

CEO: Communications, broadcast to Joint Venture Executive Harding. Tell him to stand by with SAR. We may be abandoning ship.

As. Mngr Communications: Right on it.

VP Sonar Control: Distance 1 Klick. Explosion on Target 2. Distance 1/2 Klick... Distance 3/4 Klick. I we broke it!

::The bridge erupts into cheers::

CEO: Well done. I'm putting all of you down for the Commerative Coffeemug of Exemplory Saving of Assets. I couldn't be prouder to...

VP Sonar Control: It's reaquired. 1/2 Klick out.

CEO: No $%$#ing way!

BOOM!

OOC: I discussed this post with Wayne. Originally, I had only intended to fire a single torpedo from each of my subs, but the above post is too amusing to change.

IC: DWSSCS Slam a Megaton Energy Drink Today - Bridge:

VP Helm Control: Chief, why so many torpedos? Don't you think it's a bit of overkill?

CEO: Nonesense, we've worked it all out. The CoC have sophisticated countermessures in place to stop such things. That they bombed our sub pens means they know we're out here. This way, they drop some chafe into the water, make some maneuvers, and then the next thing you know all the torps are destroyed and their 10 klicks away from their convoy.

VP Sonar Control: Um... Chief?

CEO: What?

VP Sonar Control: We have hits. Pretty much one BIG hit on the Frigate. I don't think it exists anymore.

CEO: You've got to be kidding me!

VP Sonar Control: Our second and third volleys are stopped. They're looking for more targets.

CEO: $*@#! Pull us back!

VP Aircraft Ops: We can't, we're in the middle of our launch cycle. It'll flood the launch bays at best, and likely send us to the bottom.

VP Sonar Control: Torps are moving. Three on Target 1, Two on Target 2... HOLY HELL ONE'S COMMING RIGHT FOR US!

CEO: Helm! Full right rudder! Aircraft! Close those launch bays, and tell helm when you do. Don't waste time relaying! Countermeasures, I want so much chafe in the water Whales think they're on shore! We dive the minute the launchbays are closed. All hands, brace for damage control!

VP Sonar Control: Distance 5 Klicks, closing at 50km/hr

VP Aircraft Ops: We've got an error with the launch bay doors. Our planes are away but the aft door won't close. I think it's jammed.

CEO: How are countermeasures coming?

Mngr Countermeasures: I can't empty our stocks any faster.

VP Sonar Control: Distance 3 Klicks, still closing.

CEO: *$(#, @()#, $#$@!

VP Sonar Control: Distance 2 Klicks. Explosions on Target 1. I can't even see Target 1 any more.

CEO: Communications, broadcast to Joint Venture Executive Harding. Tell him to stand by with SAR. We may be abandoning ship.

As. Mngr Communications: Right on it.

VP Sonar Control: Distance 1 Klick. Explosion on Target 2. Distance 1/2 Klick... Distance 3/4 Klick. I we broke it!

::The bridge erupts into cheers::

CEO: Well done. I'm putting all of you down for the Commerative Coffeemug of Exemplory Saving of Assets. I couldn't be prouder to...

VP Sonar Control: It's reaquired. 1/2 Klick out.

CEO: No $%$#ing way!

BOOM!




OOC: if your on the surface your not going to sink immediately, the Ohio class has a bit more displacement than that frigate did and though it probably will sink, its going to take some time.

DWSSCS Triumph of the Free Market

Joint Venture Executive Timothy Harding: Damage reports on all ships, now!

Mngr Sonar: Frigate is gone, completely. There's a bit of debris still on the surface. One of the container ships is... well... there.. and there. I'm amazed any of it is still on the surface, frankly. The third ship is here. It looks like it's going under pretty quick though. I think the crew is getting into lifeboats. And the Slam seems to have suffered a glancing blow, but I've got no reports from them at all yet.

Joint Venture VP Aircraft Wesley Rico: All our aircraft have been diverted. The Slam's attack force has landed on the container ship, the rest have landed with us and the Ad.

VP Comms: No response from the Slam yet.

Harding: Okay then, start conduction SAR on all the CoC folks in the water. Standard procedure.

-------------------------------------------------------------------------

On the deck of the DWSSCS Triumph of the Free Market:

Team Coordinator Gregory Sweeney: ::on a bullhorn:: Okay! Now we're going to begin rescue opperations, but before we do, bare in mind that you will be billed for us dragging your sorry selves out of the water. Now I've prepared a list for you, stating the exact amount that your rescue will cost, and I can prepare a custom estimate of your medical bills, provided you give me a couple of moments to think over your simptoms.

CoC Sailor: Just get us out of here already!

Sweeney: Now, as you can see by this chart, the officers are worth the most to us, so we'll be rescuing you first. If you're an officer, please raise your hands now. And please, no trying to say you're enlisted, or a lower rank. If we can't figure out what you are, we'll be treating you as a O-6 at least. Oh come on now, all of you can't be officers! Will all the O-4s and higher raise their hands! Much better. Stinky, mark down who we rescue this batch as O-4 min.

Mike "Stinky" Paulson: Hey, I think I see someone in the Slam's hanger waving at us.

-------------------------------------------------------------------------

DWSSCS Slam a Megaton Energy Drink Today

Mngr Damage Control: Um... Harding? This is the Slam. The torpedo pretty much blasted through right where our bridge was. We have the leaks contained, but we're pretty much immobile. I *think* I'm the only manager left here... we've been downsized pretty good.

I'm on a portable radio, in the fore hanger. I think your SAR team can see me if I wave.

Radio: Okay Slam You're in control until you find a VP or something. We're making Chief Executive of Assault Party Cuergosa CEO of the Prize Crew. He'll be around to attach you to the... ::silence::

We're going to call it the DWSSCS Kingdom of Erie, Now Showing at the New Wellington Playhouse Square. Anyway, you'll be towed with it back to shore. Keep a skeleton crew aboard, and be prepared to move everyone to the Erie once we have it secure.

*Emperor Ed is sitting in his ready room with Admiral Seitz looking over the situation in the lake*

Ed: So....
Seitz: Have you contacted CoC?
Ed: Yes, but no answer.. do we know for sure whats going on?
Seitz: No...
Ed: Alright... Well move the fleet out towards the territorial borders, if we get contacted we'll act then...

97 Levels down in Michaelgrad

Mike of M&M Shipping Prime Minister for Life... was musing over the recent communication from Nimzonia. He had never heard the term "Minder" before, so he calls a meeting with Em, and Secretary of State Mike Oldsmobile XXVII. Oldsmobile calls in his Chief Lackey for Protocol.

Oldsmobile "Lackey, what is a "Minder"?"

During this time Mike of M&M... is poking the buttons on his Mike-O-Soft M-pod internet browser.

Chief Lackey "Well, sir I think it means Valet you know a Man's Man."

Mike of M&M "Ooooohhh, it says here that it is a baby sitter."

Oldsmobile "Mike, you don't think Mr Åsheim is going to have a baby sitter?" he stupidly remarks in a distainful manner.

Mike begins to pout and pulls out a new Desert Eagle .60 cal semi automatic, chrome plated with a laser sight.

Those Government officials that have lived around Mike of M&M... have learned that Mike is not very bright but he is incredibly lucky. They have also learned that when he is fooling around with a weapon is is best to be somewhere else. But Oldsmobile was new to the job and thought he had more power than he really did.

Em, not paying attention to Mike calls Michael Turing probably the smartest man in MadderMike and a brilliant code breaker. He was educated around the world mostly in Edenstein and CoC and actually other than firearms training during the summer received no education whatsoever from MadderMikian schools.

Long Pause

Em "Ok Michael says it is a body guard and errand boy mostly underhanded errands but mostly a body guard."

Oldsmobile to Mike "Hah, I told you it wasn't a baby sitter!" Just then Mike dropped the gun and it discharged sending the highly experimental fragmented bullet into Oldsmobile's forehead turning his brains to soup.

Mike "OOPS, guess we need a new Secretary of State." turning to the Chief Lackey.

The Chief Lackey beginning to sweat profusely worried Mike would appoint him.

Mike "Lackey round up viable candidates for the job and I will interview them tomorrow. Oh and send a note to Nimzonia that the negotiation party is acceptable.

The meeting adjourns

Michaelgrad

The Nimzonian negotiators arrive at various times over the course of a week. Instead of sending them on an official jet, the government decided it could save money by inserting them in various last-minute vacancies on budget airlines.

Gunar Lövborg was the first to arrive, followed by the lackeys. It took a bit longer to find the cheapest possible way to send Mr Åsheim and his minder on the same flight. This was necessary, since there was no way of telling where Åsheim might end up otherwise. When they had all arrived at the Ritz-Carleton, after a brief false start when Åsheim attempted to check into a phone booth, a message was sent to the office of Mike of Mike and Mike Shipping informing him that they are ready to proceed with the negotiations.

OOC: handy info on the previous treaty - http://ns.goobergunch.net/wiki/index.php/Missing_Zeroes_Treaty


Triple-N News Channel, morning bulletin with Simon Sandvik

Veteran NNN news anchor Simon Sandvik, whose trademark bright orange fake tan had recently been replaced by a real one complete with sunburn, delivers a cheesey wink to the camera.

"Good morning! I'm Simon Sandvik, and this is the morning news. First on today's program, I'll be looking at a disturbing downtrend in corruption. In the last 18 months, Nimzonia has slipped from 200th to more than 28,000th in the UN rankings on corruption. Things have got so bad, that recently a security guard refused to accept a bribe to allow our photographers into Admiral Jakobsson's bedroom. We asked the man in the street what he thinks of the situation."

*cut to random passers-by who have just been accosted by a NNN news crew*

"Er, yeah" says a bewildered-looking everyman, scratching his chin and wishing he were somewhere else, "I think it's terrible the way corruption has gone down. I mean, there used to be a time where every man had a price, you know? Nowadays the kids value honesty and integrity. I don't know what this country is coming to."

"What happened to good old fashioned nepotism, is what I want to know!" demands an old granny, brandishing her walking stick threateningly, "General Jaarinen, now there was a man who knew how to look after his family, but if you look at the current administration, how many of them are related to Admiral Jakobsson? Not one, that's how many!"

"It's destroying this country!" asserts an emaciated-looking traffic warden, "People used to bribe me a small amount not to give them a ticket, but now they just pay the fine. I can't even bribe my superior to overlook it when I smash the windows and rip off the stereo."

*Back to Simon Sandvik in the Triple-N studio*

"So there you have it. Nimzonians troubled by a rise in integrity. But you can count on us at Triple-N to maintain the levels of corruption expected of a public institution! Now, moving onto our next story, Nimzonia is experiencing a countrywide shortage of sunblock..."

::A Malcolm class AIP submarine on patrol nearby hears the explosions through its sonar and sprints at 15 knots to see what caused them as it approaches closer they see an Ohio type vessel being towed by a freighter and no sign of any of the other vessels from the convoy. Making an Obvious conclusion the sub manuevers in for a shot at the damaged Ohio to finish it off::


::3 MK 48 torpedo's are streaming through the water at the Ohio type ship::

::Both the Manarthian Remnants and the Gasco, Smith, and Openheimer Holdings corporations have sent delegates to the Maddermike/Nimzonia diplomatic relations talks, in the interests of maintaing cordial relationships with Maddermike, and entering new relationships with Nimzonia.::

::When word came that the torpedos were in the water, the Ohio was quickly cut from it's morings. The freighter began making a run for the Nimzonian coast leaving the sub dead in the water.

The remaining crew of the sub tries to make it into lifeboats before the torpedos hit.::

Onboard the battle of the Canal.

Hazelwood is running along a passage waving his chainsaw. Somewhere on the ship he can still hear gunfire, but it is becoming more sporadic. Suddenly two zombies block his path.

Zombie #1: "All ur brain r belong 2 us!!!"
Zombie #2: "LOLOL!!!!!111"

Hazelwood saws them in half and keeps on running, looking for somewhere he can hold out.

Hazelwood: "Well, at least they aren't 70s disco zombies."

::Both the Manarthian Remnants and the Gasco, Smith, and Openheimer Holdings corporations have sent delegates to the Maddermike/Nimzonia diplomatic relations talks, in the interests of maintaing cordial relationships with Maddermike, and entering new relationships with Nimzonia.::

::When word came that the torpedos were in the water, the Ohio was quickly cut from it's morings. The freighter began making a run for the Nimzonian coast leaving the sub dead in the water.

The remaining crew of the sub tries to make it into lifeboats before the torpedos hit.::




::The Captain of the Sub Orders the one harpoon already loaded to be fired at the freighter hoping to cripple its engines from a rear facing shot::

::The Captain of the Sub Orders the one harpoon already loaded to be fired at the freighter hoping to cripple its engines from a rear facing shot::



::Admiral McLeod is being bombarded by a lot of emergency radio traffic::

::His Operations officer comes up::

Sir, we've lost contact with several ships, the FCS Axe, FCS Battle of the Canal and all 3 Freighters the Axe was escorting.

McLeod: Wait a minute, you said we lost contact with the Battle of the Canal, that is a Tarawa Class LHA right?

Aye Sir, there appears to be a large amount of gunfire and the radio transmissions we have received are garbled. It looks like the ship is not being steared so a Destroyer has been shadowing it trying using visual signals to make contact, no luck. They have reports of a couple of Helicopters trying to take off and then once in the air crashing back on the deck, and one that got pushed into the water by a crowd on the flight deck.


McLeod: Try listening in on the Marines Tactical radios, there has to be something.


Aye Sir, I'll pass the order along.

We're getting a report from one of our subs that they spotted one of the missing freighters towing what looked like a crippled Silencer class sub, he launched torpedo's at the sub to sink it, since it was obviously an enemy, and he launched a Harpoon at the Freighter to destroy its engines and steering so that she can be boarded before reaching Nimzonia.

The rapidly spreading debris from the destroyed sub mask the signature of the Frieghter long enough for it to get out of range of the torpedo (fired from maximum effective range). The Frieghter enters Nimzonian waters.

((Damn it! Let me get this *&^#ing ship!))

The rapidly spreading debris from the destroyed sub mask the signature of the Frieghter long enough for it to get out of range of the torpedo (fired from maximum effective range). The Frieghter enters Nimzonian waters.

((Damn it! Let me get this *&^#ing ship!))

OOC: Dude I launched a missile, but ok, it missed ;)

*A well dressed man stands in front of a large view screen holding some notes, he is addressing a "panel" of 7 other men*

WDM: And that is why Deathsock needs to be taken out...

General: Sir.. I can have 3 companies descend upon their stronghold...

Mr. Selatcia: We wait.......

WDM: Now... onto new business, we have the opportunity to make an investment in the corps in New West Palm... this is a fantastic opportunity to undermine the CoC efforts in the region...

Bishop Ravenblood: But arn't we now in the handshaking mode with them?

General: Yes, but we are always looking at a way to stick it to the CoC's... and this will be a way to do it while keeping our hands clean...

WDM: We are in a position to invest in one of their corps via monetary support as well as arms equipment, men and resources... Edenstein and the CoC can continue to shake hands, but in private we can continue our.... policy towards them...

Concilman: What corp can we invest in...

WDM: There are a few that we have our eyes on...

Mr. Selatcia: Make it so.....

General: I'll be on my way to New West Palm tomorrow....

Mr. Selatcia: Tooooooniiiiight.....

Mike M&M Prime Minister for Life was slowly working his way up to the surface to attend the kick off of the Nimzonian-MadderMikian negotiations when his chief Lackey informs him of the arrival of the delegates from West Palm.

Mike "Well this is very nice we haven't had a peaceful international conference since er... anyway a long time."

Mike was walking with his new "walker" he had discovered he could pack more weaponry if he perched his enormous belly on top of a walker loaded with his batteries for operating his latest weapon -- a hand held cannon of extrordinary proportions. It was a 20mm gyro-balanced auto loader. The first version broke Mike's wrist and forearm when he first fired it. Since then muzzle brakes and a recoil dampening and the gyro balancing were added. The thing weighs a modest 35 lbs, sounds like and looks like an 80's hand-held hair dryer when turned on. Mike had two of the MK4 units on his walker.

Michaelgrad Ritz-Carleton

The new Secretary of State for MadderMike and also the Gambling Minister was Mike Frod-Oldsmobile the product of 150 years of arranged marriages between the two largest manufacturing families in MadderMike. The proper way to describe F-O was Ugly with a capital U.

F-O was checking the conference room for the usual explosive devices, sound equipment and display screens. He was attended by 25 lackeys ranging from Chief Lackey to the lowly Git-Lackey. The Git-Lackey was seated behind the seat reserved for the Manarthian Remenants of West Palm. F-O took out a pair of 9mm Glocks and began firing at the Git-Lackey. The bullet proof shield seemed to be working. Little bits of hot lead leaked through but they left minimal damage to the Lackey.

F-O was awaiting the arrival of the delegates, the conference table was set up as a large triangle to improve the communications.

The concierge was getting a little nervous the Nimzonian contingent had just ordered 80 cases of ice cold Swedish vodka packed in glacial ice. This was normally no problem but there was less then a half dozen in the party. Usually this much vodka mixed with the free wheeling MadderMikian culture leads to carnage.

Michaelgrad Ritz-Carleton, conference room

The Nimzonian delegates arrive in something of a disorganised rush, because Mr Åsheim's toupe had escaped and started humping the protocol lackey's leg, and it was soon discovered there had been a mix-up at the airport with a yorkshire terrier. Mr Åsheim was now wearing the only wig they could find at short notice, which was styled in a 15-inch tall red beehive. He seemed to b quite enjoying it, and was twirling his moustache around his fingers imagining how dashing he must look. The other delegates had pulled their chairs away from him.

After they had taken their seats, there was still a little time before the negotiations kicked off, so Gunar Lövborg was going through his notes with the chief lackey.

Lövborg: "I got a message from the minister of information. Apparently, the 'We are corrupt' theme isn't working for us anymore, since Jakobsson cleaned up the bureaucracy, so we have to come up with a new theme."
Lackey: "Why do we need a theme?"
Lövborg: "This is LETI! Everyone has a theme! MadderMike has guns, Edenstein has Linux, New West Palm has soulless capitalism, CoC has that whole isolationist psycho thing going on, even Levanta has zombies! We need a new theme, or we'll be ostracised from the international community!"
Lackey: "Hmmm... Well, we can still do government scandals. What about those photos of you and that girl from-"
Lövborg: "Shut up shut up!"
Lackey: "Hmmm... Well, we lost most of our whaling industry, so that's no good anymore... let me think... what about beards and horned helmets?"
Lövborg: "People are shaving off their beards, because of the warm weather."
Lackey: *looking through his notes* "Hmmm, well, obesity figures are through the roof. I mean, a couple of weeks ago, I was driving to work, and traffic was held up because some 12-year old had a heart attack and was obstructing both lanes, and also cracked a water main when he fell on his ass. The police were having to hold back some of the disenfranchised whalers, also."
Lövborg: "Well, that might work. I hear they're now selling doorframe grease to aid mobility."
Lackey: "So we're going with that then? Good, because I've..."

Just then, Mike of M&M Shipping arrives to attend the start of the conference, waddling in on his walker. The Lackey kicks Lövborg under the table, to stop him from staring. He was trained in MadderMike, and knows all about the dangers of being impolite. He once spent eight weeks in hospital after forgetting to hold the door open for somebody.

Lövborg: "Awww... All the good themes are taken."

::The Communication specialist on board the AB Destroyer FCS Emperor Ed(comissioned during a time of peace between the two nations)escorting the errant Tarawa class ships switches over from maritime channels to listen to short range tactical channels and he starts getting transmissions from the Battle of the Canal with marines calling in panicked firefights::

::He calls over the officer of the watch::


Sir you better listen to it?


Officer: What is it Petty Officer?

Sir there is a major firefight going on over there on the Canal, I've heard mentions of dead walking, and from what it sounds like there are only 3 active companies left.


Officer: can we talk to them on those radios?


No sir, we can listen but we can't transmit on those frequency.



Officer: Ok, pass this on up to 5th Quarintine Fleet intelligence.

OOC: Tag! I'm back boys! Look for a nice post from me this week...

::Premiere Zed Carmine rustles in his sleep in the Hence Palace. As he slowly wakes up, he grins slightly. In the past year, he has succeeded in isolating HO from the rest of LETI. There has been no news of the revolution, the Blue Guards have completely succeeded in suppressing the people. In fact, he hadn't even had to make an appearance to the people in almost as long. Things were proceeding just fine. Even Sgt. Slotter had been leaving him alone for a while. Today however, as he gets up, he notices Raskalnokov in a bit of a worry::

Carmine: Dimitri. What seems to be the problem?

Raskalnokov: Well sir, I don't know. I got a report from one of our guys that there's a lot of activity on the lake again.

Carmine: ::yawns:: Doesn't concern us at all... We've even weaned the people off their hatred for MadderMike. They seriously don't care about the rest of the world.

Raskalnokov: I know, that's not the main issue.

Carmine: Then what is?

Raskalnokov: Well Sir, an unauthorized flight took off from B4U. No identifying signature, didn't respond to our communications, and the craft itself wasn't one that was recognized from one of our wings.

Carmine: So what are you saying...?

::In the airspace over DDR North, a modified airship flies low over the mists, on a course around the battle arena. The airship's captain, Cid Garret looks at his meager crew. This was the riskiest thing he'd done yet. But he owed it to his passengers. It was the least he could do. He only hoped he could get safely to the mainland without being tracked::

Cid: Well, it's been a long time coming. I certainly hope this works out for you Doc.

::The passenger Cid is talking to sighs::

Doc: For the sake of this country's future, so do I...