NationStates Jolt Archive

The Doctor is in (semi open rp)

TV Announcer:” Today is the world premiere broadcast of “ The Doctor is in” a new look into politics of our fair nation. And here is our host Dr.James Maxwell (http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v504/Ottoman01/Malcom.gif) and his co-host Crazy Eyes (http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v504/Ottoman01/buscemi.jpg)

Then the screen jump to Dr.Maxwell and Crazy Eyes,Dr. Maxwell was smoking his trade mark bamboo cigars and Crazy Eyes well…he appeared to stoned out of his mind as always.

“Good to day to the people of KLM and those who are watching overseas, shocking isn’t it…some of you are expecting to see a some random Arab or Persian or etc and speaking Arabic…I say bah to you all , your stuck with me the deranged resident English man of Istanbul and my co-host Crazy Eyes…enough said about him…right Crazy Eyes?”

The Crazy Eyes just nodded his head and said” Man I got the munches for tacos.. Whoa…I see stars…far out..”

“I take that as a yes…now lets move on to the first part of our show..the daily beating, since this is the first bloody time we are doing this…let me explain what goes on. We show a clip of a meeting of Parliament, which shows a Minister of Parliaments getting hit, or beat up by another Minister of Parliament, which actually happens quiet often in KLM…bah enough talk more watching, this happen about six hours ago in a session of Parliament and I kid you not this is the real thing.”

Cuts to a session of Parliament

The new EU Dominion Minister from Roma, has the floor to speak, he was rambling on and on about a new cultural exchange project with Imperial Commonwealth of Malkyer. The Camera show the other ministers getting annoyed about the Minister talking and on for the past 30 minutes. Which has broken an unofficial rule of KLM Parliament policy, which was no speech shall go further then 20 minutes and after that point, whoever breaks the rules gets hits or strike down for breaking that unwritten rule by his or her follow ministers.

Then one of the Ministers from Singapore, Southeast Asia of Chinese background decides he has enough is enough with this bloody Italian Ministers and his endless ramblings. He gets up from his seat in Parliaments, and heads to where the Italian Minister standing and rambling on. The Italian Ministers failures notice him coming toward him, the others Ministers and Prime Minister look on with interest. Then out of nowhere, the Minister from Singapore ran up and does spinning jump kick on the Italian Minister and just silencing him. All the Ministers of Parliament yell out “ Huzzah!”

Then the Deputy Prime Minister yell order in Parliament and the Ministers settled down and went on with daily Parliament business and as for Italian Minister, he was taken out of the meeting room by the Parliament Men at Arms who took him for treatments. He learns his lesson well; never talk to much in a room full of anger ministers. As for the Ministers from Singapore, he just returns to his seat and his colleagues lite him a Cuban Cigar.

Cuts back to Dr.Maxwell and Crazy Eyes

“Well, folks that’s a day in Parliament…what are your thoughts crazy eyes?” asked Dr. Maxwell

“Whoa..that mofo was flying and nailed that other mofo who was talking…mad crazy…” replied Crazy Eyes


“Indeed, now we shall go to our field reporter on the streets of Istanbul…but now to commercials ” said Dr.Maxwell


End of Part I, stay tune for Part II

OOC: this is just for humor from me, please post comments in the way of viewers watching the show as progresses

Ambassador Marguerite Leblanc lay back on her Embassies living room couch, idly sipping a glass of Amestrian blackberry wine and watching KLM television with mild disinterest. It had been something of a slow day and she just did not feel like going through the motions. Her aides had been ordered to take care of everything that could not be put off until tomorrow and to only bother her in the event of a desperately needed signature.

While channel surfing she came across the premiere episode of The Doctor is in and decided to give it a go. Although in her opinion the new show’s beginning was not very impressive (light on real humor, overly brief introduction, and seemingly weird for the sake of being weird), she could not help but laugh as the Singapore Minister clobbered the Roma Minister with an impressive spinning jump kick.

He definitely works out, Leblanc observed, taking another sip of her wine.

As the show went to commercial Marguerite was left to ponder the feeling that she had seen Dr. Maxwell somewhere before.

With a top hat and monocle he would probably bare an uncanny resemblance to the Mad Hatter from Alice in Wonderland, the Ambassador decided.

Yes, that was a possible inspiration behind Dr. Maxwell's deranged persona. Leblanc sat up a little as the commercial break came to an end, waiting for the Mad Hatter’s distinctive hat and monocle to make an appearance.

The Cameras cut back to Dr.Maxwell and Crazy Eyes, who failed to realize they were on live T.V…

“And that’s the story of how my grand father kicked the crap out of Winston Churchill father in Parliament and which resulted in him getting kick out of Parliament and forever banning the anyone of Maxwell blood from stepping foot in the House of Commons…” said the Doctor

“Wow…no wonder why the Sultan never took a step in Parliament so far…” replied Crazy Eyes

“Indeed…oh look, we’re back on air, bloody jolly good for us, there is no point in waiting any longer folks…I know everyone in Istanbul is talking about the recent City Council Elections, which has 20 seats up for grabs and apparently the WASP expatriate community made some major gains, 2 seats were captured by Malkyeri expatriates and another 2 seats were captured by Praetonian expatriates…what does this mean to common people of Istanbul…I don’t know..how about you Crazy Eyes?” asked the Doctor

Crazy Eyes looked at the Doctor perplexed and said” We had a city council elections…since when….I must have been tripping on something in order to not notice it…”

“Apparently so, Crazy Eyes…lets cut to our field reporter Shotgun Jim in order to get the republic reaction to these recent elections and yes I know what you thinking…why do we have a reporter by the name of Shotgun Jim and my answer to you…Don’t worry about it!”


Cuts to the field reporter Shotgun Jim (http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v504/Ottoman01/867bfb80.jpg) begun to speak: “ Well yes, Dr.Maxwell and Crazy Eyes, the people all over the coffee shops are talking about the city council elections with great interest.”

Dr.Maxwell nodded and said, “ Can you give us any specifics?”

“Yes, I can, Dr.Maxwell…the most comment opinion about the newly elected city council, is theses god damn fuckers better get their act together and fixed those bloody potholes.” Said Jim

“Couldn’t have put it any better, how about the opinion on the Anglos getting elected to the city council?” asked Dr.Maxwell

“Well, the general opinion of the people….to paraphrase some Gone with the wind…frankly sir I don’t give a damn.. But I heard some of the tea shops will be rising prices on certain bands of tea in light of recent events.. They were rambling about increasing profit ratios during tea time for the Anglos..” replied Jim

“Good to know…well that’s all the time we have today for this topic, see you tomorrow Jim.” Said Dr.Maxwell

And Jim nodded and he went off the air, then Dr.Maxwell realize Crazy Eyes was pass out, so Maxwell pokes him with his cane to see if he was still alive and Crazy Eyes waked up and said “ Whoa. I had a mad crazy dream…I was having dinner with Captain Ahab and we were discussing the themes in The Plague by Camus…”

Dr.Maxwell arched his eyebrow and remarked” I really didn’t need to know to that…but bah…now after these following commercials, we will conduct our daily interview of Imperial Government officials and other poor sobs…today, the High Chancellor will be our first person to interviewed by Crazy Eyes and mes..”

Cuts to Commercials

The Cameras cuts back to Dr.Maxwell and Crazy Eyes, the Dr.Maxwell was on his phone and saying the following

“Herr Doctor, don’t mixed those chemicals again, remember what happen last time?” and barely audible was the person he was talking to talking back “ Yes,Mein Führer….I shall not blow up our lab yet again!”

“Good, oh great my show is on air again, later!” and Dr.Maxwell hang up his cell phone and begun to talk to his viewers

“Welcome back folks and for those who are just tuning in…your about to see the best part of the show right Crazy Eyes?”asked Dr.Maxwell

“Indeed, this is the part of the show where we get to interview someone..and afterwards…we get high!” said Crazy Eyes

“No Crazy Eyes, we don’t get high on this show.…” replied Dr.Maxwell

Crazy Eyes shrugged “Too late for me..”

“Indeed..now lets being our guest, the High Chancellor Hashmir al Horatius Bin Assad, the auther of the recently released book called “WTF” is going on in KLM Poltics!” said Dr.Maxwell

Then High Chancellor Hashmir al Horatius Bin Assad (http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v504/Ottoman01/b1b0478d.jpg) enter the room and took his seat with Dr.Maxwell and Crazy Eyes

“So how do you do, sir!” Ask Dr.Maxwell in a cocky British Accent

“Fine…it’s a great pleasure to be on your show, dear sir!” replied High Chancellor in his cocky British Accent

“Why are we all talking in British Accents?” said Crazy Eyes in his British Accent

The High Chancellor and Dr.Maxwell thought for a moment and shrugged , yet Maxwell manger to said “ Because we feel like it!”

“Ah good enough reason for me..” replied Crazy Eyes

“Now lets get down to business…what’s your new book “WTF” is going on in KLM Politics!” about?” asked the Dr.Maxwell

“It discusses recent events and put them into viewpoint of the Imperial Government polices.” Replied the High Chancellor

“ I see, also I notice in your book, that you discuss about the formation of an new faction within the government, can you explain in detail about this new faction?” asked the Dr.Maxwell

“Why yes, before this new faction came to be, it use to be the following factions, the hardliners, the Unionist-Reformist, the labour aka el Liberals and now a new group as come out of the shadows, they are compose of dissents wings of the existing factions, they are simple known as free radicals. They have yet to break away from the current party system to form their own party. They believe that hardliners are too narrow mined, the liberals as too open mined for their own good and the Unionist-Reformist as archaic faction that has pass its prime and is too weak to enact a harder stance against the Oceanians. They are similar in ideas and mannerisms to the old young Ottoman Movement in terms of their zeal for righting errors in the Government and their love of the Imperium.” Said the High Chancellor

“So they are a bunch of piss off Ministers and Viziers who had enough with the current faction systems and decides to create their own faction while saying in their respected parties in other words forget this shit, we’re starting our own group of anger mofos.” Said the Dr.Maxwell

“Apparently so.” Remarked the High Chancellor
“So what bearing does this have in the future of KLM policy overall?” asked Dr.Maxwell

“A lot more intense debates in the House of Vizers and Parliament and more Ministers and Viziers going home with black eyes or worse..In other words, things are going to get very interesting in the near future..” said the High Chancellor

“Well that concludes our meeting, thank you for coming here, High Chancellor.” Said Dr.Maxwell

“No Problem, it was fun, being here.” Said the High Chancellor

“For tomorrow show, we’re have the President of Imperial Senate here, and we’re ask the question..what happen to Mel Brooks lost film…”Jews in Space”…in till then good night and bah to all you ratings people!” said Dr.Maxwell and just the credits rolled..

Leblanc watched the show’s credits roll with mild exasperation. The hat and monocle had not made a single appearance!

Despite her annoyance at the host, and the overly brief interview, she had found High Chancellor Hashmir al Horatius Bin Assad’s observations rather interesting. The Ambassador decided to have her staff purchase the High Chancellors book, “WTF” is going on in KLM Politics!”, and investigate the “free radicals”.

Draining her wine glass, she checked to see what was on next.

Hmm, reruns of Doctor Who…

Not really fond of science fiction, Marguerite decided to pass on that and returned to her idle channel surfing.