NationStates Jolt Archive

In Tangalee At the large Imperial Palace, People came by The Thousands to hear their Great and Powerful Ruler, Empress Neherenia The Conqueror, Speak about The War.

The People Watched as Neherenia came onto the Bocany and The Hatarians Cheered.

"We, The Hatarian Empire are Beloved of The Gods," She said. "We have Conquered Nations, Lead Great Armies and ruled The Peoples of Spain, China, Cuba, Algeria and The other Colonies well, It has Cost us Dearly. Some of Our Troops have payed in Blood by Questerian Guns and a few Freekish ones too. That We Do not Forget or Forgive. Yes, Soon We will Show the world that Hataria is Great, When North Africa is Hatarian, When Xharn is Crushed, When Automagfreek Burns, when Questers Bows to us, when The World is Ours, Then We will Stand Before The Gods in their light as Masters of The World....BANZAI!!!!!"

Soon The People started Yelling 'Banzai' as They Cheered their Empress on.

Official Imperial Statement

Empress Neherenia should stop playing Rome: Total War so much and write her own speeches. Congradulations, you have a population that is easily impressed by a speech blatantly ripped from the opening cutscene of the Scipii faction in campaign mode. Seriously, there were plenty of better games to rip speeches from, and yet you still managed to completely disgrace Rome: Total War. Again, the Senate, People of Doomanum, and myself congradulate you on your supreme lack of intelect.

-Emperor Maximus III

TO: Empress Neherena
FROM: Kaiser Konrad II
RE: Your stupid speech

There is this question I have always wanted to ask you; why are you so retarded? Oh, and why do your people like you?
Signed, Kaiser Konrad II
Kaiser of the Zukariaan Empire

Official No Endorse Diplomatic Dispatch (TM) (patents pending)

I must say that out of all the comments that have been so far put forth, the list being extremely short and comprised of only myself, Maximus, some Zukarrian fellow (the Kaiser I believe), and Empress Neherenia, I must concur with the Doomingsland response. Furthermore, I fully condemn the actions of Hataria towards the Blub Empire and welcome them to engage in tactical exchange with No Endorse forces at our earliest convenience. There is no need to RSVP, we are more than aware of the current circumstances and are more than willing to come to you.

-Atal Amner, Prime Minister of No Endorse

President Thomas O'Donnelly sat in his office reveiwing a tape of the speech made by the Hatarian Emperess...

As the speech ended O'Donnelly raised an eye brow and looked to his cabinet.

The room exploded in laughter, as O'Donnelly was unable to contain a fit of giggles to make a formal reply to be sent on the matter of Hatarian blanket aggression.

Laughter.

Official New Tipperite Response, directed to Neherenia
How have you managed to cling onto power so long? and how have you magically escaped being vaporised in all those nuclear attacks that have been launched against your nation during its long history of warmongering? If you have some magically device or secret that has enabled you to survive this long, would you please share it with us.
In addition, how dare ye disgrace such an excellent game as RTW, im afraid that this official puts the state of New Tipperary at war with Hataria for this blatant warmongering against our allies and for the act of serious copyright theft.
*attached Sound File plays here*


ATTACHED SOUND TRACK = Chick Flip by the All Saints

Highly Official Response from the Department of Short Responses to Silly Things:

lol k

Ivan Ivanovitch, Minister of Short Responses to Silly Things

Official Clandonian Response

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v338/madnukedude/clandoniansmallflag.png


His Majesty would like to inform the Hatarian's that they will not be allowed free reign and continue their imperialistic advance on nations that can not fight back. We wonder how your nation continues to survive despite being vaporised by nuclear weapons, having the Empresses plane shot down and numerous other events that should mean Hataria doesn't exist as a nation.

The Hatarians also seem to be like a cheap forgery store, first ripping naval ships and now moving onto cut scenes from RTS games. Perhaps some creativity is greatly needed in Hataria otherwise they will continue churning out mindless poorly constructed English and products like a Chinese firework factory.


His Majesty King William VII

King of the United Kingdom of Clandonia Prime

HAHAHAH classic!

Emperor Paulus Whyatica I wishes to challenge Empress Neherenia to a battle. The battlefield: Rome: Total War. Here we will truly see the extent of Hatarian 'bravery' and 'honour', as the Emperor is a top-ranked Rome: Total War player within the Whyatican-Velkyan Total War leagues. Or is the Empress too afraid to face a real opponent, on a fake battlefield?

Message from: President raslin Gregov Illiyich
To: The world, especially Hataria

Body: Chellis has been long watching the pitiful nation of Hataria, through its pathetic excuse of an existence. The only amazing thing Hataria has ever done is manage to not be obliterated in its first year of existence, and that is hardly a legacy.

We are quite tired of having to hear about you, quite simply. We have had cases of our citizens literally being sick after hearing the mere mention of your nation, disgusted at the thought. Your continued existence is a blight on the world, and serves no purpose.

The Chellian Council has come to agreement with me. A state of war now exists between the sad nation of Hataria, and the Communist Haven of Chellis. This will not end in an occupation, nor a change of government. This will not end in an annexation. This will end in the complete obliteration of everything Hatarian. We do not care to hear from your government from this point on, and we will not be replying to any messages from your nation.

Hataria's fate is set in stone. When all is said and done, Hataria will be but a bad memory in the minds of the world. We hope you have enjoyed your lives, collectively, for they will soon end.

Emperor Paulus Whyatica I wishes to challenge Empress Neherenia to a battle. The battlefield: Rome: Total War. Here we will truly see the extent of Hatarian 'bravery' and 'honour', as the Emperor is a top-ranked Rome: Total War player within the Whyatican-Velkyan Total War leagues. Or is the Empress too afraid to face a real opponent, on a fake battlefield?


OOC: I would if I could, But The Only Comptuer with my Rome Total War game has a dead Mottem.

Bump

"Is she serious? She sounds like a thirteen year old," asked Emperor Erik Sirus Kersk Xericus as he twirled a pencil in his fingers and replayed the speech over and over again, mainly for humor.

"From my experience, sir, Hatarian threats are often futile and unwise but they are serious enough to take notice," said one of his chief advisers.

"They are like a nation of teenagers, I swear. On what planet will they ever burn Automagfreek, heck even we couldn't do that?!" laughed the Emperor.

"Remember, sir, the people of Hataria have never been... well, they scored pretty low on intelligence aptitude tests, at least the ones in our former colony in Western Hataria," nodded the adviser as he brought up the test results on a nearby video screen.

"Oh yes, I remember. They could barely understand how to fire our rifles. Then those friendly fire incidents occurred and we had to scrap the whole civilian militia idea," nodded the Emperor.

"Well, imagine a person like that with enough brain cells to attach the title 'empress' to herself. Thats the type of person we are dealing with, sir," replied the adviser, pointing to a picture of the Empress of Hataria.

"Very well, well I suppose we should send an official response. Take this down..." sighed the Emperor.

Official Public Response:

"The Imperium has taken note of your continued warmongering and we mourn for the passing of all logic within the bounds of your realm.

The Imperium asks that you abandon you futile quests of imperialism and war, as they will bring your people nothing but pain and agony along with the shame of total defeat.

Good day.

Emperor Erik Sirus Kersk Xericus
http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v462/ITDGov/Signatures/496533974311020377226.gif"

Emperor Erik Sirus Kersk Xericus
http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v462/ITDGov/Signatures/496533974311020377226.gif"

OOC: Love the signature, man! Classey!

IC:

Official Response From the Principality of Wilhelmsborough

In light of Empress Neherenia's unstatesmanly and downright odd behavior, the Principality has decided, in absentia, to provide the Hatarian sovereign with a perscription of Ritalin.

http://www.cnn.com/HEALTH/9811/09/hearts.ritalin/story.ritalin.jpg

In addition, we will also be sending the Empress this t-shirt.

http://www.bobfromaccounting.com/bfastore/relaxtee.jpg

We here in the Principality are wishing the Empress well.

Signed,

Prince William Kennedy, Sovereign
Sir Salazar Sherman, General of the Air Force
Nicoli Trotski, General of the Army
Vittorio Augustine, Admiral of the Navy
Geddy Lee, Minister of Foreign Relations

Beginning Open Message...
Starting message...

To: Empress Neherenia, Hataria
From: President Justin A. Herbert, Asgarnieu
Subject: Congradulations

Greetings. It is amazing how some people can be led on for so long. Some attribute it to stupidity, or just misinformation. In the case of your people, it is sheer mental retardation. The majority of your populace should locked in a tiny cage and given the straight-jacket treatment. There is no cure for that kind of stupid, the only treatment is an extravagant amount of bullets to the skull.

Your "military" takes over far smaller nations. Your "military" does not take these nations over with good soldiers, but with waves of untrained, unorganized, unintelligent attackers. A dirty tactic at best. Let us not forget your cowardly use of GodRods in battle.

We wish to congradulate you upon your absolute stupidity and obliviousness.

Respectfully,

Justin A. Herbert
President of The United Democratic Empire of Asgarnieu

...END MESSAGE...