NationStates Jolt Archive

Kensington Palace, 1900 hrs.

The President summoned the Minister for Defence to his office.

"Ms. Sinclair, my Prætorian Guard is...lacking. I need them to be trained," he stated coldly.

"Well, sir, it's a unique challenge. I'm trying my best," she stuttered.

"Not good enough, Supreme Commander. I want all thirty-thousand of them trained by the Skgorrians, then I want you to create a domestic training programme modelled after the Skgorrian one," he ordered.

"Yes, sir," she replied.

"Now, being all 'evil president' and stuff made me want to have some fun...want to execute some prisoners and then have sex?"

"Of course, sir."

Skgorria, 1800 hrs the next day

The Prætorian Guard troops disembarked at a major port and began to head to a training camp.

As a gesture of international goodwill, the Atopian Union of Fascists has despatched the Shock Division to Skgorria to aid in the training of the Praetorian Guard.

"Well gentlemen, they are on their way here," Storm-General Beckenbauer stated, "our allies the British Londinians are here to learn all of our tricks of the trade and pick up some shiney new equipment. Is it all ready?" One of the Storm-Colonels nodded,
"thirty thousand SAD Infantry kits have been prepared and are ready."
"Good," smiled Beckenbauer, "I have word that the prisoners will be here soon. Then the training will begin. When the Londinians arrive, have them form up in the main square - it will be big enough to hold them all."

OOC: I built a super-large camp just for you. Aren't I nice? :p

OOC: You are :p
IC:

The columns of Guard troops approached the training complex. Compared to their Londinian facilities, this was Brobdingnagian in proportion.

Field Marshall Crompton, the officer in charge of the Guard, led the troops. Following Skgorrian directives, they lined up in perfect formation in the main square.

OOC: He has sex after killing people? Reminds me of a Bond villain, besides being creepy...

"Ah, Storm-General," began General Ganz, "good to see you again. AUF sent us over here to learn a few things and give you a hand training the wet-ears, you know?"

OOC: Meh. He is a Bond villain, I guess. In the next film, he engages in a diabolical scheme to rob the Bank of England using stolen Goldeneye satellites. :p

"General Ganz!" Beckenbauer beamed as he saluted his old friend, "just let me get this speech started and finished, then I'll fill you in. Its going to be a busy day for us all." He left the command hut and stepped out to the square.
"Attention!" he called as he marched out onto the square and mounted a podium. Turning the microphone on, he adressed the Londinians,
"You are here to learn how to kill, how to exterminate, to eliminate, to eradicate. We will equip you with the knowledge and the means to kill. The enemy is a virus and must be expunged, Action without Delay!"

At this, Skgorrian troops began handing out a kit to each infantryman. Each kit contained:
- 1 x Ak-107
- 4 x magazines
- 6 x frag grenades
- 1 x bayonet
- 1 x 9mm pistol
- 4 x 9mm ammo

Ganz watched with pride as his youthful soldiers stood rigidly to attention while Beckenbauer harangued the mixed Atopian and Londinian parade. Meanwhile, ignoring the fact that he was happily married, he shifted his hand to rest on his ADC's pert buttocks - a perk of being a General, he'd long ago found out...

"Aye, aye!" was the chorus from the troops. They began their drills.

"Right, when you're all familiarised and equipped, get back at attention!" Beckenbauer's bark had kept many a Skgorrian in line, it was needed with such hard cases as those in SAD. After the Londinians were back at attention, Beckenbauer turned the mike back on.
"Alright you lot, out of that entrance," he pointed to the west, the opposite entrance that the Londinians had come in, "is a rather large shanty town of just under 4,000 people. The ground is open all around the town so they can escape, we're just pretending to give them money so they will stay. Field Marshall Crompton, take as many as you want and leave no-one alive. The rest of you will stay here for weapon drill. Carry on." Turning to Ganz, he smiled.
"Remember when I pulled that one on you?"

"Haha! Ah, yes," sighed Ganz, then, laughing, "those were the days. I still wake up sweating about that flamethrower that exploded, you know!"

Lieutenant Willens grimaced. The flamethrower nightmare always presaged unwanted attention, but the General was the General, and she didn't want to end up in a camp, or worse, a Blackshirt internal security station...

Field Marshal Crompton took in two thousand men to do the job. They were relentless, opening fire at every single man, women, and child, torturing the few that resisted.

Meanwhile, the rest of the troops were rotated around stands for the rest of the day. When Fulton's men came back, they joined in the cycle. The stands included:
- ranges with the AK-107s and the 9mm
- grenades, both explosive and chemical
- "Why do we kill? - the theory of extermination"
- "Bullets vs Rifle Butts: A time and place for each one"
- FIBUA (Fighting In Built Up Areas)
- calisthenics, i.e. "Run around in circles because this is Special Action Division and we love pointless bollocks"

This continued all day with half an hour for lunch, and stopped at 6 pm. Beckenbauer requested that Fulton join him in the command building for a conversation.

Ganz, having retired to his command vehicle with Willens for a quick 'debriefing', decided that he would attend the officer's briefing. Telling Willens to remain in the vehicle and re-arrange the maps, he strode out, adjusting his dress cap as he did so.

Half-way to the tent, he smelt burning flesh drifting on the wind, and smiled...