NationStates Jolt Archive

Feast night, as always, was quite impressive in the Sunlit Kindom, the Lord Reginald the Just was in attendance and a massive gathering of people positivly thronged through the halls of the White Palace. Bright banners fluttered, various small animals frolicked in the fields and it was a rather balmy summer day.
You may have noticed the problem with the following paragraph.
Through a trick of gravity, or light, or its rather excessive thaumic index, the Sunlit Kingdom was just that, sunlit. Constantly.
Of course its inhabitants didnt notice this much anymore, their distant ancestors had suffered a few mental breakdowns when they arrived, but now people were used to it. It was, theoretically, a perfect world, so people simply slept when they felt like it.
In a regular economy, this would have caused havok on a massive scale, but nobody raised that particular issue, so nothing happened. Things worked, gravity stayed on, stuff fell when dropped (unless they were going to be dropped ON somebody, in which case they often stayed up long enough to avoid it). The Sunlit Kingdom was an ideal world, for those who lived in it. There was no downside, in a figurative sense, no workers had their backs broken to support the royalty, the royalty were generally cheerful and often had ten fingers and ten toes, and there was food for everybody. One or two people who refused to be cheerful had to be executed, but nobody liked it.

The Great Hall, with its windows and polished floor (nobody knew how it stayed polished, but it did) sparkled nicely in the constant mid-afternoon sun, various couples danced and a jester (alas, even perfect worlds must have flaws) capered and make various poor jokes.
Reginald wore his usual slightly dazed smile, as King of a perfect world, he wasnt required to do much and the boredom had long ago reduced him to something like a chair in a robe. He also had arthritis in his neck from wearing a rather heavy gold crown every day.
Few people noticed when the jester froze in mid-caper.
A few turned when he screamed though.
Smoke poured from his eyes and mouth, his clothing was charring around the edges and a rather nasty crunching noise was coming from various joints.
He fell over and steamed gently on the floor.
Silence.
The jester looked up, and gazed around the room with his now empty eye sockets.
One pair of joints at a time, ankles, knees, hips and (rather sickeningly) one vertibra at a time.
He looked down at himself.
"Damn. Wrong body..." The sudden shocked gasp caused him to look up.
Reginaled emerged from his stupor, and glared at the jester, "Sir, you will not swear in my court. Mhm...hmm...ah, Guards!"
Two guards, looking rather worried, advanced on the jester.
Sighing, he would have rolled his eyes if possible, the jester snapped his fingers. The Guards immidiatly turned into a pair of rather nice statues.
The jester also imploded at this point, puffing into a cloud of ash.
Reginald promptly repeated the process the jester had gone through a little while before.
Standing up, Reginald cracked his neck.
"Now then."
COWER BRIEF MORTALS, I AM THE DARK GOD SHEOGORATH, LORD OF DARKNESS AND FIEND OF THE PIT, BOW TO ME OR FACE ETERNAL TORMENT!
The words arrived directly in the brains of the various people present in the hall, bypassing ears and the various workings within the head. Most of those present stopped whatever they were doing and the guards dropped their weapons.
"Thats better. Listen up, Im in charge now. Questions?"
Silent stares.
"Ill take that as a no. Good job you lot. Im bringing in a few friends now, so I advise stepping off of the dance floor."
The dance floor promptly fell inward, replaced by a black pit which seemed to go on forever, its walls vanishing in an inky darkness that seemed to suck at those who had been quick enough to get off the floor before it collapsed.
Sheogorath raised a hand.
"Rise."
A strong wind from the pit blew back the ones looking over the edge, moments later, floods of warriors crested the edge of the pit, spears and swords, axes and maces, and a variety of other weapons, all very nasty and quite old it seemed, came with them. Without a sidelong glance, they left the hall and proceded to kill every person on the castle.
Sheogorath tweaked the correct muscles and forced the late Reginald's face into a rictus smile. Taking a step towards the throne he slipped on the highly polished and now blood-covered floor, cracking his puppets skull and doing some serious damage to his legs.
"Fuck. Bloody humans."
With some more cracking, Sheogorath stood back up and wiped the dripping brains from the back of his head before (carefully) making his way to the throne, where he sat. Experimenting again, he managed half of a rictus smile, the right side of his puppets face seemed to be broken.

Harmonia Mortus Redux;11601470']Feast night, as always, was quite impressive in the Sunlit Kindom, the Lord Reginald the Just was in attendance and a massive gathering of people positivly thronged through the halls of the White Palace. Bright banners fluttered, various small animals frolicked in the fields and it was a rather balmy summer day.
You may have noticed the problem with the following paragraph.
Through a trick of gravity, or light, or its rather excessive thaumic index, the Sunlit Kingdom was just that, sunlit. Constantly.
Of course its inhabitants didnt notice this much anymore, their distant ancestors had suffered a few mental breakdowns when they arrived, but now people were used to it. It was, theoretically, a perfect world, so people simply slept when they felt like it.
In a regular economy, this would have caused havok on a massive scale, but nobody raised that particular issue, so nothing happened. Things worked, gravity stayed on, stuff fell when dropped (unless they were going to be dropped ON somebody, in which case they often stayed up long enough to avoid it). The Sunlit Kingdom was an ideal world, for those who lived in it. There was no downside, in a figurative sense, no workers had their backs broken to support the royalty, the royalty were generally cheerful and often had ten fingers and ten toes, and there was food for everybody. One or two people who refused to be cheerful had to be executed, but nobody liked it.

The Great Hall, with its windows and polished floor (nobody knew how it stayed polished, but it did) sparkled nicely in the constant mid-afternoon sun, various couples danced and a jester (alas, even perfect worlds must have flaws) capered and make various poor jokes.
Reginald wore his usual slightly dazed smile, as King of a perfect world, he wasnt required to do much and the boredom had long ago reduced him to something like a chair in a robe. He also had arthritis in his neck from wearing a rather heavy gold crown every day.
Few people noticed when the jester froze in mid-caper.
A few turned when he screamed though.
Smoke poured from his eyes and mouth, his clothing was charring around the edges and a rather nasty crunching noise was coming from various joints.
He fell over and steamed gently on the floor.
Silence.
The jester looked up, and gazed around the room with his now empty eye sockets.
One pair of joints at a time, ankles, knees, hips and (rather sickeningly) one vertibra at a time.
He looked down at himself.
"Damn. Wrong body..." The sudden shocked gasp caused him to look up.
Reginaled emerged from his stupor, and glared at the jester, "Sir, you will not swear in my court. Mhm...hmm...ah, Guards!"
Two guards, looking rather worried, advanced on the jester.
Sighing, he would have rolled his eyes if possible, the jester snapped his fingers. The Guards immidiatly turned into a pair of rather nice statues.
The jester also imploded at this point, puffing into a cloud of ash.
Reginald promptly repeated the process the jester had gone through a little while before.
Standing up, Reginald cracked his neck.
"Now then."
COWER BRIEF MORTALS, I AM THE DARK GOD SHEOGORATH, LORD OF DARKNESS AND FIEND OF THE PIT, BOW TO ME OR FACE ETERNAL TORMENT!
The words arrived directly in the brains of the various people present in the hall, bypassing ears and the various workings within the head. Most of those present stopped whatever they were doing and the guards dropped their weapons.
"Thats better. Listen up, Im in charge now. Questions?"
Silent stares.
"Ill take that as a no. Good job you lot. Im bringing in a few friends now, so I advise stepping off of the dance floor."
The dance floor promptly fell inward, replaced by a black pit which seemed to go on forever, its walls vanishing in an inky darkness that seemed to suck at those who had been quick enough to get off the floor before it collapsed.
Sheogorath raised a hand.
"Rise."
A strong wind from the pit blew back the ones looking over the edge, moments later, floods of warriors crested the edge of the pit, spears and swords, axes and maces, and a variety of other weapons, all very nasty and quite old it seemed, came with them. Without a sidelong glance, they left the hall and proceded to kill every person on the castle.
Sheogorath tweaked the correct muscles and forced the late Reginald's face into a rictus smile. Taking a step towards the throne he slipped on the highly polished and now blood-covered floor, cracking his puppets skull and doing some serious damage to his legs.
"Fuck. Bloody humans."
With some more cracking, Sheogorath stood back up and wiped the dripping brains from the back of his head before (carefully) making his way to the throne, where he sat. Experimenting again, he managed half of a rictus smile, the right side of his puppets face seemed to be broken.
These events were being watched in two diffrent places.

In one place, that was not a place, sat a Dark God in black leather, with white skin, black lips, grey eyes and white hair.

It was of course, Kajeenith, The God of the Infinite nothing. Since Kajeenith sat in the infinite nothing, he couldn't really be detected, but then, all he really ever did was watch. Did that really qualify him nowadays as Dark. Possibly not.

However..

In the Shadows, Seven eyes watched, from the Shadow Plane.

"Hmm, so a pit Demon that fancies himself a Dark God. Father would be most displeased if we did not watch, did not see how this developed." Said one, a male.

"Ahh, but why should the Ministry of Shadow concern itself with the affairs of a small kingdom that fancies itself perfect?" asked 3.

"Because, even though their young, they could be an enemy or a friend. Perhaps we should stop by, and introduce ourselves. Perhaps not. he is after all, obviously to weak to show his real form." said 7.

(OOC:
Could you cut that quote? Its not really needed...)

Glancing upward suddenly, Sheogorath snapped his fingers. The ceiling of the hall went transparent, giving him a handy view of the watchers.
"Do you think you can spy on me in my own realm without me knowing? You may think you are dealing with some mere low-order demon, but I assure you, once I have secured this...kingdom you will know my power. If you wish to contact me again, come yourselves. Or send a letter."
Snapping his fingers again, Sheogorath growled a spell of sealing, locking off the area secured by his troops from all outside interferance.
Glancing back at the former Court of the Sunlit Kingdom, Sheogorath pointed to a few corpses and gestured.
Out of the pit various noises, mostly unpleasant, issued.
A few moments later, a number of the former advisors of the king stood up.
"Molag Bal, Mehrunes, take my forces and crush what is left of the humans. Watch out for some gits who think theyre better than us, if you see them, set up a seal and move on. We can deal with them later." Two of the figures nodded and stepped out.
"Pyrite, gather your mages and start converting the palace and grounds, and do something about the floor." Mehrunes had slipped twice on the way out, "Give me something nice, in black, with lots of assorted fire. And do something about the rabbits."
Yes, my lord. Stew, perhaps?
"Hell no. Possibly cut their heads off and spike them on the gate, or use them as grapeshot. Eating things that sickeningly cute gives me a stomach ache."
But of course, Master.
"Get to it. The rest of you, secure the palace and prepare to shift more forces."

---

Mehrunes Dagon, Lord of Destruction, skipped merrily through a nearby village. He had modified this body slightly. It was now twelve feet tall and had an extra set of arms. Laughing, he smashed through some kind of inn, beheading a merry tavernkeeper who was polishing a mug in a jovial sort of way. No doubt the man had been chubby and rosy cheeked, it was hard to tell now.
Various undead soldiers went about their occupation with somewhat less enthusiasm, being undead. A few were looting in a professional sort of way, mostly for the look of it. One or two had tried rape, but found that being dead for a thosand years tended to wreck ones sex drive. Most of their actions reflected their master's sunny disposition as he traipsed around the town. Some were even weaving drunkely through the streets holding beer mugs as they mauled everything in sight.
Mehrunes grabbed a small child by the leg and, in a lighthearted way, used it to smash in a shop window before hurling a fireball inside.

---

It was almost too sad. Molag Bal sometimes despaired of his counterpart showing any professionalism. With a quiet gesture, he turned half of a town's population into dust and drove the rest insane.
Mehrunes had no concept of minimal use of force, he just blew things up. Yes, he was thorough, but only because he become more focused as he got bored. Usually he only got bored when he wasnt killing something. Of course, he hadnt had a chance to kill something for a long while now, ever since that bastard Cyril 'the Great' had sealed them away.
A momentary surge of anger resulted in the remaining villagers bursting into flame.

---

Pyrite was unhappy as well, mostly because his duty consisted of hunting down vermin. He had tried six deadly plauges, nine varieties of pox and a curse so virulent that the ground where he had stood when it was uttered had turned to pure, clear glass, which extended at least a mile deep and still glowed red hot.
And still, there were rabbits.
He hurled a plauge spore at a passing floppy-eared sort, which promptly burst, spraying innards and various rabbity items over a wide area, infecting those that were near. Within a few minutes, no more rabbits were in sight.
A few seconds later, they were back.
----------!
Pyrite cursed a rabbit to a million years as a pit worm on the lowest level of Oblivion.
There was one solution to this.
It was a desperate measure, but the rabbits really had to go. You couldnt run a Kingdom of Darkness with fluffy bunnies running about.
He would have to summon...
the Goblins.

"'Ere bunny bunny bunny, lookit da nice carrot."
The rabbit, backed as far into its den as it could go, gave the Goblin an expression that suggested that, while rabbits werent very bright, they could be considered as tax asessors or possibly astronauts before Goblins.
An extensive device consisting of bones, grass, bits of string, a stick of dynaite, two glassess of lemonade and a carrot had been rigged outside of the rabbits hole.
"Damn rabbit. Oy! Kruk! Bring up da flamer! Dis one ain't gonna come out n' play."

Pyrite looked on in growing panic. He was wondering if the rabbits werent part of some sort of defence scheme set up by Cyril all those years ago.
A goblin ran past with a rabbit clamped onto its nose. Two more were on fire and heading for a duck pond.
A mage ran past with no less than six hanging from his robes.
Sheogorath is going to kill me.
Pyrite realized that this was not possible, but somehow the thought did not comfort him.

bump

OOC: Okay, no more quotes.

IC:

The Ministry of Shadow continued to watch anyway. where there were shadows, there they were, beings of darkness, the seven fragmented shards of a Dark God's soul.

Meanwhile, out in the nothing...

"Ha, I like this Sheogorath, I think I'll pop in and offer him a hearty welcome and a hand in getting started." Kajeenith said.

So it was that a door appeared in the wall that was not there previously. It opened, and Kajeenith walked out, and closed the door. It disappeared.

The Thing of it is, is that while Kajeenith could be seen, he could in no other method, be detected. It was as if he simply did not exist.

"Greetings Sheogorath, Welcome to life outside Hell. Before you go asking who I am, let me tell you. I am Kajeenith, And in this particular reality, I am an Elder God. I rule the Infinite Nothing beyond this Reality, and before the next, and inbetween all others. Most Dark gods at this point would simply try to kill you in order to take over your spot and add more power to their arsenal, but I wish to give you a hand in taking over, what do you say?" he asked.

"Elder Gods, minor gods, upstart gods, demons, this universe is so very regimented." Sheogorath cracked his neck again, "I am Sheogorath, and I am nothing. Or perhaps I am something else, but if I were, would you know? Who knows, I sure dont. Pardon me." With another quick gesture, the hall was filled with light, although the surface that had once been fine polished marble now looked like burnt black obsidian, melted and distorted. "I dislike univited guests. If you have any sway with the shadow fellows, advise them that if they do not desist in attempting to pierce my safeguards that I will be forced to dispatch Mephala to them.
"As to being killed, I wish them luck. The planes of Oblivion are littered with the rended spirits of those who have sought to oppose us, and the ability to move freely between forms and dimensions makes disposing of us quite difficult. Ah, pardon me again, Mehrunes returns."
Mehrunes Dagon, bloody to all four elbows and with a belt of heads now adorning his wasit, turned sideways and ducked to get through the door.
"Ah, one of the invisible gods things. We had one of you back in Oblivion once." Mehrunes cracked a set of knuckles. "He figured that just 'cause he was Mr. Invisible nobody knew where he was."

Harmonia Mortus Redux;11603748']"Elder Gods, minor gods, upstart gods, demons, this universe is so very regimented." Sheogorath cracked his neck again, "I am Sheogorath, and I am nothing. Or perhaps I am something else, but if I were, would you know? Who knows, I sure dont. Pardon me." With another quick gesture, the hall was filled with light, although the surface that had once been fine polished marble now looked like burnt black obsidian, melted and distorted. "I dislike univited guests. If you have any sway with the shadow fellows, advise them that if they do not desist in attempting to pierce my safeguards that I will be forced to dispatch Mephala to them.
"As to being killed, I wish them luck. The planes of Oblivion are littered with the rended spirits of those who have sought to oppose us, and the ability to move freely between forms and dimensions makes disposing of us quite difficult. Ah, pardon me again, Mehrunes returns."
Mehrunes Dagon, bloody to all four elbows and with a belt of heads now adorning his wasit, turned sideways and ducked to get through the door.
"Ah, one of the invisible gods things. We had one of you back in Oblivion once." Mehrunes cracked a set of knuckles. "He figured that just 'cause he was Mr. Invisible nobody knew where he was."

"The Shadow Ministry, The Government of Ri-an hunts them down with a one billion dollar reward for their capture. I'm not the Ri-an government most certainly not. Occasionally I kill them just for a laugh, damn things always respawn though." Kajeenith said. He He snapped and the Shadow ministry died.

"Anyways, Mephrunes, that idiot deserved to die. I don't hide, everyone knows where I am, I just technicly do not exist. I still ask though, would you like a little help in taking over?" Kajeenith asked.

"Psh, dont try that exestensial stuff on me. The other guy said he didnt exist, but now his invisible head is on an invisible pike. People keep running into it."
Mehrunes turned and left.

"I think we have things under control. Your assistance is not required."

Harmonia Mortus Redux;11604769']"Psh, dont try that exestensial stuff on me. The other guy said he didnt exist, but now his invisible head is on an invisible pike. People keep running into it."
Mehrunes turned and left.

"I think we have things under control. Your assistance is not required."


"I am afraid mehrunes does not understand. Very well then, see you later." Kajeenith said, and with that, he was just simply gone.

OOC: For what it's worth, I like your posts. They're clever and unique. I'm just wondering how you plan on interacting with the rest of the NS community.

Sheogorath shrugged then went back to redecorating the great hall with a few splashes of colour.

(OOC:
I planned on getting into the FT community, from what Ive seen (not much, admitably) the Magic/Future tech blend has mostly died out except for the Warhammer 40k people, which almost doesnt count :P
My old nation did pretty well using near-pure magic tech, I even had a few magical nukes ;))

Sheogorath made the final gesture needed in the spell he was invoking while several of the dead chalked a number of unpleasant symbols on the floor. Strictly speaking, the gestures were not required, but they looked neat and made the whole thing much more impressive.
Mehrunes was present as well, amusing himself by hurling heads at the spikes which now adorned the hall. Sheogorath was only moderatly annoyed, blood was difficult to wash out, but it would help the spell along its way.
Four of the Great Princes of Oblivion had passed through this portal to the High Realms thus far, of course not even Sheogorath knew how many there were in full, but twelve had agreed to a pact. Azura of the Twilight, Malacath the Cursed, Namira the Webspinner, Nocturnal of the Dark, Boethiah the Plotter, Sotha Sil the Tinkerer, Akatosh the Dragon, Arkay who keeps the Balance and Mara, the Mother.
Those who already arrived were, as you know, Sheogorath, whos province is thought, Mehrunes Dagon the Prince of Destruction, Molag Bal the Deceiver and Pyrite, who govorns plauge, pestilence and orders the lower minions of Oblivion.
There were many more, some inventions of humans, some of other races unknown to any. There was, in fact, a Prince of Big Ugly Pink Things worshipped by a species of sentient pebbles from Earth. He was rather dull and generally ignored. Pebbles arent terribly creative.
Looking back on the list of beings traveling to this plane, one may have wondered about the last two, who seem somewhat out of place. Arkay sought the journey out of a desire to achieve greater power, from the realms of Oblivion he had little direct influence.
Mara is more complicated. Strictly speaking, Mara is 'good'. The Princes have no real affiliation, they are quite human in some ways. Mara herself has killed many, not as many as Mehrunes, but far more than the average human being. Mara, as with Arkay, sought power to influence the world, but also had a desire to see with her own eyes the wonder of creation beyond Oblivion, having been 'mother' to many cultures. Viewing the world that is from the planes of Oblivion is no small matter, a glimpse of a minute can take weeks to set up. Longer than six minutes is beyond the ability of even the greatest of the Princes.
Back to the present...
Sheogorath nodded in satisfaction. The circles were drawn, the encantations uttered and the sacrifice made. A few minutes more and the others would pass through the barrier seperating the worlds.
UTU YARATHYA SAYANITA GOGORTOS! NUMANYATA EA! EA AZURA! EA!
The pit that was the center of the hall grew lighter now. It was not a shattering, blinding light, nor was it a flickering hell-light. The soft light of evening on a clear day, when the sun has drifted just far enough below the horizon that the harsh reds and yellows have vanished and all that remains is the faint glow on the horizon, that was what streamed upwards from that pit.
Azura was, however, shockingly, shatteringly beautiful. Pale skin, tinted ever so slightly blue, shone with the same light as was eminating from the depths of her realm of Oblivion. It was said that few of the very few mortals who made the treacherous journey to Oblivion and looked upon her face could bear to depart, the silver and soft gold light of her realm could paralyze the very soul of a wanderer, even some of the Princes were thrall to that sight and to her.
Once her foot touched the hall, the heavy blackness of the place lifted slightly. Azura, unlike Mara, was not strictly 'good', but she prefered negotiation and intelligence to mindless violence, and had occasionally consulted with Sheogorath.
"Ah, dear brother. How goes it? Am I the first to arrive?" Her voice, like the wind on a warm summer night, if that is not too cliche, was known to send people into trances.
"But of course, I think it is only fitting, O Prince of Begginings and Endings. You did miss our excellent company though. Some oddball who claimed not to exist and a bunch of shadow things. You would have enjoyed toying with them I've no doubt."
"Perhaps." Her voice took on an edge now, a sudden chill that forbodes a coming storm, "Mehrunes. Busy, as ever?"
Smiling, Mehrunes Dagon extended a head, "As ever, dear. Care for a morsel? These humans are quite tasty."
"Disgusting, I thought a trip to the world would have a positive effect on you. Ah well, I am going to view our new realm. When you are done summoning the others, I trust we shall meet?"
"But of course," Sheogorath nodded, "It may take some time to gather enough power to form a body for myself and the others of the first wave, but we will have to discuss the future of this realm."
Azura sniffed at Mehrunes and daintily vanished into thin air.
"Never liked her. To snooty for me."
"That would be because you are a barbarian with no sense of tact, Mehrunes."
"Yup."

Several hours passed, events, as events usually do, transpired.
The general agreement of the council group was fairly straightforward. Those who dont hang together tend to hang seperatly, thus the twelve would form a council to lead the country, Sheogorath was decided on as speaker and moderator, although Boethiah was possibly more intelligent, he also tended to have some sort of scheme to gather more power to himself.
Sheogorath and the others of the first wave had dropped their human shells and adopted their acustomed forms. Sheogorath was presently what, to your average human, would be a 17th century banker or wealthy merchant. Nobody knew why he used that particular form, but somehow it suited him.
Amoung the others present those worth mentioning for their...oddity were Mehrunes Dagon, presently a thirty foot tall giant with four arms wielding a variety of nasty weapons, Boethiah, an amorphorus being of tentacles, eye stalks and mouthes, and Akatosh who had only been persueded to forgoe his 'thosand foot long dragon' in favour of a mere hundred foot long dragon because of the importance of the meeting. He had been grouchy throughout the entire affair.
As the documentation developed, a clause was quickly added to keep Mehrunes from eating more than ten people a month, gradually something like a government took form.

The armies of the Prince's were, at the time of the signing, finally starting to encounter resistance amoung the people of the realm. The people of the Sunlit Kingdom had finnaly figured out that peaceful protest would not work against opponents who had absolutly no morality. Or internal organs. Mostly their protests had been ignored. In some cases, when they tried to block the progress of the armies they were simply mown down. Here and there villages were wiped out when too much resistance cropped up.
A lingering problem was rodents.
The Sunlit Kingdom apparently had an endless supply of them, and no matter how many Goblins were imported, the problem wouldnt go away. Mehrunes had gotten frustrated and blasted nearly a mile of earth into glass a meter thick, but a few hours later it was hopping with rabbits.