NationStates Jolt Archive

OOC: So, this is basically intended as an opportunity to expand our foreign relations. Those unfamiliar with Gruenberg can look up our Wiki page, ask for anything they want to know, or take a stab in the dark. We're broadly "MT/PMT", but aren't too picky. Posts can be silly or sensible, we don't mind. Basically, feel free to post whatever seems appropriate.

IC:

"For years a secretive, isolationist reserve, off-limits to all but a few select, highly-vetted foreigners, the Holy Wenaist Sultanate of Gruenberg has, under the leadership of reforming Sultan Gardab Woltzten IX, blossomed into a much more open state of affairs, actively engaging in the international community, establishing a variety of relations with friendly nations, and taking the stage as one of the more prominent advocates of free trade. Although its present administration continues to stress the importance of national sovereignty, it has participated in various articles of international law, and holds membership in assorted treaty, trade or defence pacts or organizations. After a narrow election victory for the ruling Monarchist Party in the recent elections, foreign policy has become a major talking point within the country, with it becoming increasingly clear that not only do previously unexpected numbers of Gruenbergers support the Sultan's efforts at expansion of foreign relations, but that many feel even greater steps to become part of the global community could be taken..." A New Gruenberg: A New World?, Comment, The Gruenberger Chronicle (24/06/06)

By decree of His Grand High Holiness, Sultan Gardab Woltzten IX:

An open invitation to expansion of relations

For too long, Gruenberg has toiled in the shadow of an ever-expanding network of global agreements, accords, exchanges and relations. For too long, our land, our customs, our religion, our people, have been the subject of suspicion, ignorance, and even derision. For too long, we have neglected to extend hands of friendship, through whatever means, to nations who in the great many cases share the same goals as we ourselves do.

As such, The Holy Wenaist Sultanate is now seeking to expand its foreign relations significantly. Our intentions are to be as open and accommodating as possible, but the State Department has prepared a brief schedule of assorted levels of involvement. Nations should feel welcome to indicate support for all appropriate levels, with previous involvement with Gruenberg being of only limited priority in our assessment of requests. We strongly welcome all opportunities at exchanges of embassies, as these are good staging points for the development of further relations, and are in particular seeking to expand our trade connections.

Also recognising that the international community is not merely a populace of nations, but of individuals, we are also open to establishing relations with specific persons, corporations, non-governmental organizations, or other appropriate units. Foreign investment (subject to certain regulations) is very heavily encouraged, and likewise, we welcome all opportunities for Gruenberg's strong businesses to expand and collaborate in the global market.

No fat chicks.

1. Mutual Recognition of Sovereignty
Agreements to recognise the territorial and political sovereignty of one another; required for any national relations. This would also include recognition of Gruenberg's sovereign waters (including its 200 nautical mile EEZs) and airspace, its sovereignty over the Gelzien Nub, all federally-administered tribal areas, and all protectorates and colonies, and the divine right of manifest destiny of its citizens within its occupied lands; similar recognition would be extended to foreign parties.

2. Embassy Exchange
Extensive areas of Flurthwel, the capital, have been set aside for embassy buildings, many of them incorporating historic Gruenberger architecture combined with modern technology. Ambassadors are exchanged subject to standard principles of diplomatic immunity, and "good faith" agreements on intelligence. Additional terms are negotiable.

3. Trade Agreement
Gruenberg is a promoter of global free trade, and will always be willing to negotiate multilateral free trade agreements, and participate in free trade organizations. Other forms of trade relation, including specific agreements on intellectual property, industrial development, the environment, and other aspects of commerce and trade are welcomed. We're less keen on "workers' rights", but are obliged by law to permit our unions to join international federations.

4. Cultural Exchange
This would include any variety of exchanges, from "twinning" towns and cities and organizing student exchange visits, to negotiation of credit transfer schemes in higher education and arrangement of sports, musical and other events. We are happy to distribute foreign newspapers. Language schools teach our national language, Rukialkotta, which as a structured conlang has proven easy to learn, and projects along these lines are especially promoted.

4a. Religious Exchange
Gruenberg is a theocracy. Wenaism is its state religion, and other religions are subject to certain restrictions. Wenaism is not an especially widely-followed religion outside of Gruenberg, but it is gathering popularity in New Age circles. We are always happy to provide missionaries, teaching materials, and to establish relations with any Wenaist communities or nations.

5. Aid And Development
Gruenberg has come into a position of relative affluence, and is not averse to participation in targetted development aid schemes, subject to certain conditions and scrutinies. It is also a founder member of the International Development Bank, which may more be able to address certain requirements for aid. Gruenberg itself is open to aid, especially in the development of its transportation systems, although it prefers to meet such goals through utilisation of foreign investment.

6. Standards Cooperation
Gruenberg employs the metric system, the Gregorian calendar, and assorted other standard units of mensuration. It believes harmonisation in such areas is wholly appropriate, and is willing to collaborate in all agreements on standardisation of signage, communications, and other areas, especially where involved in international trade.

7. Military Agreement
Gruenberg believes in its sovereign right to control its armed forces, develop and utilise conventional weaponry, and to possess nuclear weaponry. However, it recognises the need for international accord in areas such as weapons testing, and is open to limited offers of multilateral security agreement, such as non-proliferation acts, arms limitation treaties, and moratoria on certain weapons types and uses thereof. It is also open to offers of military alliance, although it retains a predominantly non-interventionist stance with regards to foreign conflict.

8. Alliance
This would take two forms: alliance with an individual nation, or alliance with an international organization of nations. This would naturally be reserved only for trusted nations, whose goals are clearly in tandem with those of Gruenberg. Alliance would lead to further cooperation in various aspects of agreement, research, and so on.

The above list is intended as a general guide to our approach to foreign policy, not a set menu. Relations crossing category, falling outside the obvious remit of any listed relation type, or otherwise falling into the "other" category would also be welcomed, subject to negotiation.

Responses should be addressed to the Viziery, the main bureaucratic arm of the Sultan's administration, who will evaluate all requests based on all available information. The Viziery is happy to furnish any additional information requested.

Ongoing Status Assessment

Embassies

Ausserland
Azraelonia
Ceorana
Gejigrad
HotRodia
Omigodtheykilledkenny
Patriacha
The Palentine
Xeraph

Non-aggression pacts

Gejigrad

Trade agreements

Ceorana
Elyria-Lorain
HotRodia - under negotiation

Cultural exchanges

Free shepmagans
Londim

Other

The Healers Of Gabria - Research cooperation

Greetings and Excelsior your Vizirship,

The Palentine is very pleased to see that the Sultianate if finally opening its goat worshiping doors, to diplomatic relations with the outside world. We hold the nation in Gruenberg in high esteem, due to its tenacity in fighting the good fight in the UN. Therefore the Palentine wishes an embassy exchange. We would like to send to your fine nation, Mr. Ignazio Pbrrrt (http://i48.photobucket.com/albums/f235/HoratioSulla/180px-BennyHill.jpg). He is a career diplomat, and is very friendly(though a bit silly at times). We hope to hear from you soon.
Excelsior,
Lord Julius
Prime Minister

The Viziery
Flurthwel
The Holy Wenaist Sultanate of Gruenberg

The Principality of Ausserland would certainly be most interested in establishing formal diplomatic relations with the Holy Wenaist Sultanate of Gruenberg under the provisions of item B, above. We do have one concern, however. We are puzzled as to the meaning of "'good faith' agreements on intelligence. In fact, we consider the term somewhat oxymoronic. If the Sultanate could elaborate on this condition, it would aid us in our consideration.

Patrick T. Olembe
Minister for Foreign Affairs

Sir,

The Emperor has declared interest in exchanging embassies with Gruenberg. We have one available for you in our new Royal City of Ravenii. Ouur ambassador to your nation will be Admiral Lord Erik Castle. He will be accompanied by a platoon of Royal Marines, and a staff of fifteen, and will arrive in your country, if approved, via HCGS.

We look forward to hearing from you.

respectfully,

Vlad, Prince of the Empire, Regent of The Grey Phoenix, in the Name of the Emperor.

Subject: Diplomatic Relations
From: Matthew Thompson <mthompson@execcomp.gj>
To: Gardab Woltzten IX <[ x ]>
Date: 06.24.06 1651


Your Sultanship,

+++In response to your opening of your country to foreign relations, I have been authorized and instructed by my People to offer the People's Community of Gejigrad as a potential candidate for a non-aggression pact, if at all possible, as well as an embassy exchange.

Signed,
[signature]
People's President Matthew Thompson,
People's Community of Gejigrad

From:The Confederacy of Free Shepmagans
To:Gruenberg

We would like to welcome your nation onto the world scene by sending you a clan of our elusive timber wolves to display in one of your zoos or perhaps keep as family pets. We would also like to enquire about the customs and traditions associated with Wenaism, our nation prides itself on religious freedom and religions that aren't patently destructive are encouraged to help diversify our culture.

((OOC Basically we're buttering you up to get info about your religion, see whether to covertly encourage it or ignore it and hope it doesn't become a threat. We may be a direct democracy but the security council is a bit over protective.))

The Palentine

We shall be grateful to receive Ambassador Pbrrrt, and shall ensure to smack him with a soup ladle should his silliness become excessive. Given our historically close relations with the Evil Conservative Empire, The Palentine's embassy will be located on Mezzenech Street, one of the most famous streets in Gruenberg's history and scene of the infamous "Go For The Face! Riots". We shall be glad to make any additional arrangements to accommodate Mr Pbrrrt's needs. In return, we will be dispatching Miss Tennarty Welsch (http://img218.imageshack.us/img218/7097/t60298qpl5d7rr.jpg), General Secretary of the Women's Self-Defence Alliance, the largest female gun lobby group in Gruenberg, and proud owner of the nation's most comprehensive anime collection. We look forward to every opportunity to continue to work with your nation this exchange may bring.

Ausserland

Further to your question, the "good faith" agreements are in practice of little consequence. We believe that embassies should be used to promote friendly diplomatic relations, and see covert espionage as a fundamental anathema to such aims. However, we in Gruenberg pride ourselves on our hard heads (we like butting fluffies with them) and accept that intelligence collection has historically always been a feature of diplomatic missions, no matter how close the relations of countries. The aforementioned agreements merely seek to establish that the more excessive disruptions possible are to be avoided - for example, your nation will be permitted to hire in contractors to conduct necessary repairs, if you feel that having Gruenberger nationals undertake work within certain portions of the embassy might compromise national security.

Xeraph

Admiral Lord Castle will be welcomed to Gruenberg. Your embassy will be located in the riverside area of Flurthwel, on Mahajadan Square, the site of several diplomatic complexes. His staffing requirements are more than acceptable. In return, we shall be sending Ambassador Prontox Magarin (http://img48.imageshack.us/img48/8800/hzphotoneutral30ns.jpg), a career diplomat with a sideline in Star Trek slash. He will be accompanied by a modest staff, and is ready to fly out to Ravenii at the earliest possible opportunity. We look forward to healthy relations between our two nations developing from this exchange.

Gejigrad

We thank Mr Thomson for his offer, and are certainly interested in initiating a non-aggression pact with Gejigrad. As for the embassy exchange, offices are being prepared for an embassy in Manora Place, Flurthwel, in the financial district, whilst our diplomatic services have singled out former army officer Penntar Assine (http://img485.imageshack.us/img485/411/22687ce.jpg) as our representative to Gejigrad.

As for the terms of the non-aggression pact, we propose the following:
The Government of the Holy Wenaist Sultanate of Gruenberg and The People's Community of Gejigrad, desirous of strengthening the cause of peace their two nations have reached the following Agreement:

Article I. Both High Contracting Parties obligate themselves to desist from any act of violence, any aggressive action, and any attack on each other, either individually or jointly with other Powers.

Article II. Should one of the High Contracting Parties become the object of belligerent action by a third Power, the other High Contracting Party shall in no manner lend its support to this third Power.

Article III. The Governments of the two High Contracting Parties shall in the future maintain continual contact with one another for the purpose of consultation in order to exchange information on problems affecting their common interests.

Article IV. Should disputes or conflicts arise between the High Contracting Parties neither shall participate in any grouping of Powers whatsoever that is directly or indirectly aimed at the other party.

Article V. Should disputes or conflicts arise between the High Contracting Parties over problems of one kind or another, both parties shall settle these disputes or conflicts exclusively through friendly exchange of opinion or, if necessary, through the establishment of arbitration commissions.

Article VI. The present Treaty is concluded for a period of ten years, and shall be subject to renewal on a similar basis thereafter.

Article VII. The present treaty shall be ratified within the shortest possible time. The ratifications shall be exchanged in Flurthwel. The Agreement shall enter into force as soon as it is signed.

Should the above be acceptable, we will be happy to offer our ratification.

Free shepmagans

The nation of Gruenberg prides itself on its famed Animalpark Grand Zoo in Merlefurt, whose head keeper reports that it would be more than capable of arranging to house and display a clan of timber wolves, on the understanding that a native handler would accompany them to assist with the initial adaptation of the species.

As for Wenaism, we are happy to provide a brief overview of our religion. Wenaism is a monotheistic religion, which holds that the universe and all life within such was created by the Holy Mother Goddess, Wena, who returned to walk the Earth several hundred years ago. Her words were taken down by scribes, and now form the religious texts that inform modern Wenaist beliefs. Unfortunately, these writings are incredibly vague, and all of which are written in the arcane Bazhtan language (and the authority of translations into other religions has been disputed). This has led to differences of interpretation. As such, it is difficult to pin down many specific beliefs as "Wenaist", or to categorise the religion as "liberal" or "conservative" on social or economic issues.

We hope this at least provides enough information for you to begin considering your policies on Wenaism, but shall be happy to elaborate further.

OOC: The idea of Wenaism is that it's a religion of peace, love and charity...that has been twisted by the authoritarian government of Gruenberg into justifying restriction of civil liberties and social conservatism. Followers in other countries tend to be exiles who promote Wenaism as a religion of peace, and as a contrast to other major religions, of great individual freedom. So the idea is that Wenaism is a "nice" religion that is used in a "nasty" way. Comparisons with RL are strenuously denied.

Free shepmagans

The nation of Gruenberg prides itself on its famed Animalpark Grand Zoo in Merlefurt, whose head keeper reports that it would be more than capable of arranging to house and display a clan of timber wolves, on the understanding that a native handler would accompany them to assist with the initial adaptation of the species.
Certainly, we shall send a specialist along with them.

We hope this at least provides enough information for you to begin considering your policies on Wenaism, but shall be happy to elaborate further.
It does, while we don't support any one religion, we respect the people's right to whichever religion they please. If any of your churches wish to send missionaries they are welcome, as long as they realize that our nation embraces all forms of freedom with open arms, and that what they may believe is indecent, passes for morally upstanding here. Also, you must understand that if someone asks for amnesty, we will almost certainly grant it.
((OOC: Ah ok. Complicated, I like it. :)))

Subject: RE: RE: Diplomatic Relations
From: Matthew Thompson <mthompson@execcomp.gj>
To: Gardab Woltzten IX <[ x ]>
Date: 06.24.06 1932


Your Sultanship,

+++Our own Sunniva Åkesson (http://ewancient.lysator.liu.se/pic/art/t/r/trish17/furry.jpg) will be sent as an ambassador to your nation, along with her staff and two squads of People's Army troops, if such an arrangement is acceptable. As for the Gruenbergian embassy in Gejigrad, there is a building ready for use in the Embassy Wing, an outdoor extension of the Executive Complex. It is the third such building on the left side of the central garden.
+++Your proposal for an agreement seems quite acceptable. I shall fly in at the earliest possible moment, that being this Sunday. I will most likely be arriving in the late afternoon. Are you free then?

Signed,
[signature]
People's President Matthew Thompson,
People's Community of Gejigrad

Certainly, we shall send a specialist along with them.

It does, while we don't support any one religion, we respect the people's right to whichever religion they please. If any of your churches wish to send missionaries they are welcome, as long as they realize that our nation embraces all forms of freedom with open arms, and that what they may believe is indecent, passes for morally upstanding here. Also, you must understand that if someone asks for amnesty, we will almost certainly grant it.
Excellent. Then we eagerly anticipate the receipt of the timber wolves, and hope they will prove an crowd-pulling attraction.

The Viziery will be pleased to send a small missionary party to Free Shepmagans. We are more than used to dealing with nations with greater religious "freedom" than we ourselves permit, and our missionaries will be sure to be respectful of this. We are not seeking to push a global political agenda covertly - we merely wish to bring the hope and joy of Wenaism to a wider audience.

President Thomson,

Sunday afternoon would certainly find me and my staff ready to receive you - although perhaps later in the afternoon would be preferable. We will immediately initiate the assembly of a welcome party, and rooms at the central diplomatic reception hotel will be prepared for you and your staff. The signing and exchange of ratifications will take place in Columnar Hall, where all important documents in Gruenberg's history of treaty and international agreement have been signed.

We will also arrange a brief tour of Flurthwel for you and your delegation, should your time permit such an excursion.

Sultan Gardab Woltzten IX

MoH Home Office
004 El Dorado Drive
HotRodia City, HotRodia



The raised eyebrow, combined with a grin, made for an interesting expression on Jim's face. Sam had to chuckle at the sight. He couldn't blame Jim for making an odd expression. Most people made an odd expression when encountering part of Gruenberg's amazing and wonderful culture. After reading the full document a second time, Jim moderated his expression. "Well," he said, "I suppose we could do a little something here. We have some common interests."



From:Sam I Am, Minister of Hospitality
To:the Viziery, Gruenberg

Greetings to the Viziery,

It is with great pleasure that I relay to you the Tire-Burning Torque Empire of HotRodia's interest in opening diplomatic relations with the Holy Wenaist Sultanate of Gruenberg. We are interested in a mutual recognition of sovereignty, an embassy exchange, and if possible, a mutually beneficial trade agreement. If your nation is likewise interested, we would be happy to arrange the specific terms of the embassy exchange, and then use the diplomatic channels we establish therein to discuss the particulars of the mutual recognition of sovereignty and a trade agreement.

With Utmost Respect,
Sam I Am



Sam wondered if the embassy would be done in time for the Ambassadorial Gala. He hoped so. Gruenberger guests were always the life of a party.

I have read of your nation with interest and wish to ally to you. I am Dr. Ghech Trebyry of the Community of The Healers of Gabria. Only one per cent of our population are Healers, but we have a strong history and tradition concerning the healing arts.

As we are a peaceful country, we have no need for armed forces. Up until now, we have kept ourselves relatively isolated.

Our country is large, about 310,000 square miles in size. The entire population, with the exception of the Sea-Healers, live well inland. Eighty-nine percent of our nation is forested and dotted with many lakes, rivers, streams, and creeks. There are two mountain peaks, with numerous smaller peaks amidst the rifts and valleys.

There is just one large city, Khulinin, with a population of 23,926. The rest live in small villages and hamlets throughout the land.

Our religion is essentially what those of Old Earth would call ZenTao. For those who need a little more structure, there is a current understanding of Gnosticism.

I look forward to hearing from you.

sincerely,

Dr. Ghech Trebyry, Chief Healer of Gabria

HotRodia

We should be delighted to initiate the proposed discussions. The Tire-Burning Torque Empire has been a notable supporter of Gruenberg in the past, principally in our efforts to support national sovereignty, promote free trade, and generally fuck the poor, through the United Nations, and we are glad that these relations might be formally built upon. Your suggestion that the embassy exchange be commenced momentarily, to facilitate discussions of a trade agreement, meets with hearty agreement from us.

The HotRodian embassy is being planned as occupying Habbalah Street, and is four doors down from the Gruenberger Museum of Antique Automobiles. We will be glad to make any arrangements your staff would require. In return, we shall be sending the explorer-turned-teacher-turned-convicted sex-offender-turned-diplomat Petras Pubbles (http://img217.imageshack.us/img217/6862/noddy8uh.jpg), with a modest staff of high school girls.

The Healers Of Gabria

We thank you for the information about your nation. Many of the aspects of culture you describe fit well with Gruenberg's character, and we are confident that we can become more firmly associated in the future. We would request any additional details on the extent and terms of partnership you seek, and to this end suggest an exchange of embassies, to better aid the negotiation process.

The Prince of Ausserland has directed me to formally state our desire to establish diplomatic relations with the Holy Wenaist Sultanate of Gruenberg. In furtherance of this, he has designated the Hon. Amanda M. Mancuso to serve as our ambassador. (We believe she will not contravene the somewhat puzzling prohibition against "fat chicks.") Ambassador-designate Mancuso will be available to present her credentials at your convenience.

We have tentatively designated, subject to your concurrence, the premises as 2900 Prince Willehelm Avenue, Hauptstadt, to serve as your embassy's compound.

A picture of Ambassador-designate Mancuso may be found here:

Ausserland Diplomatic Service (http://www.vguild.hostrocket.com/diplomats/Diplomatic_Service.html)

Samantha S. Silverhelm
Deputy Minister for Foreign Affairs (Diplomatic Operations)

To Gruenburg,
I President of Londim am interested in opening diplomatic relations with your nation. We are open to twinning towns and student exchanges. However due to recent events we cannot offer an embassy to your nation just yet due to a Communist uprising which targets many embassies in its attcks. We do not wnat any of your citizens being killed unneccessarily. Once this dispute has been settled we will start construction of your embassy should you accept our relations. We are also open to your nations religion being promoted in our nation as we are multicultural and welcome all cultures but again I must stress do not send anyone yet until the dispute has been settled.

Regards
President Aran
The Democratic Republic of Londim

http://img153.imageshack.us/img153/1977/somersbyite3pv.png
The Federation of Azraelonia
Azraelonia Shall Prevail!
----------

To the Foreign Affairs Personnel of His Grand High Holiness, Sultan Gardab Woltzten IX,

The Federation of Azraelonia, seeking to establish and extend diplomatic relations following our change of government within the last several weeks, would like to establish Level 2 Diplomatic Relations with the Wenaist Sultanate of Gruenberg, encompassing mutual recognition of sovereignty and an exchange of Embassies and Diplomatic Representatives.

Roderick Grammar
Minister for Foreign Affairs

Ceorana Department of State

To: the Viziery of the Holy Wenaist Sultanate of Gruenberg
From: Horace Indigo, Ambassador-at-Large, the Congressional Republic of Ceorana, yo!

To whom it may concern,

Ceorana is interested in pursuing diplomatic relations with Gruenberg pursuant to sections (2), (3), and possibly (6). We have also been informed that one of our newspapers may be requesting distribution within the Holy Wenaist Sultanate. We would like to establish a Special Diplomatic Envoy (SDE) in Gruenberg rather than a standard Embassy or Consulate, because we don't see eye to eye on most issues (oops, is this mic on?) we like naming our embassies weirdly. We would also like to establish free trade relations. As for section (6), we already use the Metric System and Gregorian calendar, but would be interested in standardized labeling of packages traveling overseas.

Horace Indigo
Ambassador-at-Large, yo!

P.S. from Emma Kershel, this week's page for Mr. Indigo (written in invisible ink to avoid being caught): if you get an embassy with us, you will me communicated to by your own ambassador, and won't have to listen to Mr. Indigo and his "yo"s so much.

From the Editor, New Boston Times

We would be interested in distributing our newspaper in Gruenberg, provided that it would be possible for us to include all editorial content in the Gruenberg edition. We can print in whatever language you want, as long as said language has a word for "workers", "rights", and "liberty". *ducks*

Winona Pelotas
Deputy Editor
The New Boston Times

Thank you for your response. As we are primarily a nation who pursues peace and healing, I am, naturally, most interested in that which promotes peace and healing.

I am always on the lookout for new methods of preventative medicine, preferably what is known as "alternative medicine". I do not utilise invasive treatment methods or pharmaceuticals which have more side effects than cures, unless the patient requests them.

I am very interested in the current state of technology concerning cloning and stem-cell research.

We have little here in Gabria which would interest most nations. But I can offer in return for either funding for research or construction of modern facilities to share with the world our methods and discoveries.

I'm sure I am going to receive offers for protection, as we have nothing more than a few thousand militia-type soldiers who police the entire nation. We do, however, have a large island 27 miles off of our western coast which we would be glad to turn over to whichever nation or nations who will build, responsibly and with care, a base of operations. I cannot and will not allow military personnel on the mainland.

This being said, I would be happy to exchange embassies with you.

regards,

Dr. Ghech Trebyry

Thank you for your response. As we are primarily a nation who pursues peace and healing, I am, naturally, most interested in that which promotes peace and healing.

I am always on the lookout for new methods of preventative medicine, preferably what is known as "alternative medicine". I do not utilise invasive treatment methods or pharmaceuticals which have more side effects than cures, unless the patient requests them.

I am very interested in the current state of technology concerning cloning and stem-cell research.

We have little here in Gabria which would interest most nations. But I can offer in return for either funding for research or construction of modern facilities to share with the world our methods and discoveries.

I'm sure I am going to receive offers for protection, as we have nothing more than a few thousand militia-type soldiers who police the entire nation. We do, however, have a large island 27 miles off of our western coast which we would be glad to turn over to whichever nation or nations who will build, responsibly and with care, a base of operations. I cannot and will not allow military personnel on the mainland.

This being said, I would be happy to exchange embassies with you.

regards,

Dr. Ghech Trebyry


Dr. Trebyry,

I understand that you are interested in funding for your medical projects. The Emperor has an offer for you, and if interested I'm sure we will mutually benefit.

First, we are offering you a research grant of 350,000 USD per quarter, a total of 1.4 million USD per year, to increase by 50% every year for ten years. No strings attached, not a loan.

Second, we have within the Empire a province that is populated primarily by healers and spiritual ministers. They are known as the White-Robed Monks, and I believe that they, along with the citizens of a country called Wiccan Shadows, can greatly add to your repository of healing knowledge. We can arrange a meeting if you desire.

In return, we ask for a portion of the island off of your west coast for a naval/air base. We will foot the bill for all construction, and we do have environmental guideline that we follow so as to leave as little a "footprint" as possible. The base will consist of one carrier battle group ( 24 ships ), and one airwing ( 96 aircraft ). In addition there will be barracks for 300 Royal Marines.

If this is amenable to you, I will forward the appropriate paperwork and get our AI engineering corps to the island ASAP.

sincerely,

Lord Jin Lixian, Surgeon-General of the Xeraphian Empire

Sultan Woltzten,

I would like to open diplomatic relations with Gruenberg. My country is an agricultural powerhouse, and could provide your's with any type of produce you need.

Approximately 3/4 of our 800,000 squares miles are under cultivation. We have every plant known to man available, from fruit and vegetables, to grain and ornamental trees and shrubs. We currently have over 1600 varieties of annuals and perennials available, including over 200 varieties of roses.

sincerely,

Duchess Priscilla d'Avignon-Elyrie.

Ausserland

We shall be honoured to receive the (acceptably slim) Ambassador Hon. Mancuso and her staff. The Ausserlander embassy has been designated, subject to your approval, as occupying two 17th-century houses (don't get too excited - internal plumbing hadn't been invented then in Gruenberg) in the historic Pallaza di Perenza.

The premises on Prince Willehelm Avenue will, we are sure, be wholly acceptable. However, we must apologise, as in the designation of our representative to Ausserland, there has some confusion in the Viziery. "Dwarf" has no exact translation in Rukialkotta, and as such in seeking to find a candidate of suitable extraction, there has been a little crossing-of-wires. Nonetheless, we hope that Ambassador Bibbidip Nunongo (http://img352.imageshack.us/img352/6762/pixielanddecala9cu.jpg) will serve as a fine exemplar of our nation's famed adaptability, and shall endeavour to dispatch him to your nation at the earliest possible opportunity.

Londim

We send our sympathies to your nation as it stands proudly in its fight against the red scourge. Rest assured, the people of Gruenberg know too well the potential for the dangerous savages of Marxist poison to wreak havoc on good, upstanding citizens, and are willing to offer you every assistance in your battle to suppress the insurgency.

We thank you for your concern for our people, and as such shall join with you in a program to twin a selection of Gruenberger towns with ones from Londim, including our capital cities, and shall arrange an opportunity for a one-semester exchange of students. However, owing to security fears, we will not be dispatching Gruenberger students to Londim as yet - however, students selected for your half of the exchange would be welcome to take up the opportunity of study at one of Gruenberg's fine academic institutions at their earliest convenience.

We hope you resolve your problems within, and look forward to harmonious future relations with your nation.

Azraelonia

We congratulate you on your change of government, and wish your new administration every success. We would gladly enter into an embassy exchange with you. A spot on Hellmark Street is presently available, and we would hope this area, one of the most upmarket and sleekly-gentrified in Old Flurthwel, would prove acceptable. In return, we would intend on dispatching Ambassador Jinn Finpad (http://img249.imageshack.us/img249/3231/edwardjack5to.jpg), diplomat, novellist, businessman and All-Gruenberg Under-55 Amateur Origami Silver Medallist (Welterweight division).

Ceorana

We find all parts of your offer acceptable. Although Gruenberg and Ceorana have differed on some aspects of foreign and domestic policy, we have passively supported your delegacy of the IDU, as a much-needed voice of moderation with some support for national sovereignty, and have welcomed your nation's efforts in the field of intellectual property rights and free trade legislation. We wish you every success with your resolution presently at vote, and have cast our vote FOR already.

Your request to establish an SDE is more than acceptable. It would be located on Aschne Lane, where the terrible fire that wrecked much of East Flurthwel seventy years ago began (don't worry; it's quite safe now.) (Well, pretty safe.) (You know, you might want to bring a spare extinguisher...just in case, mind.) We would in return send a Special Diplomatic Envoy and associated staff (subject, of course, to UN legislation on diplomatic immunity); at this point, we have selected Keffi Wilderhen (http://img278.imageshack.us/img278/3593/coulter9ih.jpg), as we believe the people of Ceorana, noted for their political liberalism and devotion to journalistic integrity, would find her integrate well into their society.

We would strongly support a free trade agreement. We feel that perhaps elements of your present free trade proposal within the UN could be incorporated into any final agreement. Briefly, we would propose agreement to reduce and abolish tariffs and other protectionist mechanisms, combat monopolies, agree on intellectual property law, and establish an abritration committee to peacably resolve trade disputes between our two nations.

As for an agreement on standardisation in signage, we thought that a common agreement on aviation and shipping signals, on hazardous chemicals and goods storage signage, and an agreement on electrical signage, would be mutually advantageous.

With regards to the distribution of the New Boston Times, this would be acceptable. An English version would in fact be preferable, and likely to draw more - or certainly no fewer - readers than would a Rukialkotta version. We further assure you editorial independence and journalistic safety, and would be subject only to the restrictions of all papers within Gruenberg (these are not excessive: bans on certain forms of nudity, discouragement of excessive profanity, no outright blasphemy against Wenaism - this would be enforced by popular support anyway, we are afraid, and the allowance for a "G Notice", whereby the Gruenberger government reserves the right to ask newspapers to not print, or delay printing, articles that might seriously compromise national security and endanger lives).

The Healers Of Gabria

Rest assured, we have no desire to force "protection" on nations not desiring such aid.

We would be willing to invest in supporting research, but we feel that perhaps we would better equipped to construct some form of research facility. Several engineering teams recently collaborated in the construction of contagion research labs in the Antarctic; after this formidable challenge, they are competent to expand their base of operations to most challenges. As such, we would propose that we permit some of our firms to compete for a contract to construct your nation's healers a state-of-the-art research lab, in which you might work on concentrating on delivery mechanisms for your alternative medicines, and on developing their efficacy. We are also willing to fund research projects involving stem cells or cloning technologies, though we confess to not being world leaders in these fields.

Elyria-Lorain

We are very interested by your offer. For years, agriculture has featured as the dominant source of employment, revenue and land use for Gruenberg. However, a changing economic and literal climate, coupled with social factors, has led to its taking on an increasingly diminished status, rendering us reliant on stable foreign agricultural supplies. Grain - Gruenberg still produces vast quantities of rice, but has struggled with other cereal crops - vegetables and nuts are especially required, and any promotion of trade in such crops would be most desirable to us. In return, our expanding manufacturing sectors would be most capable of providing you with more advanced machinery with which to cultivate and harvest your crops, whilst our agrochemical firms have produced a range of effective and safe fertilisers that could prove beneficial.

Additionally, we might propose your nation provide a selection of flora for exhibition in a special "Foreign Fringes" show at the Animalpark Zoo in Flurthwel. Finally, we would be interested in arranging for your rose breeders to consider replanting the famed Rose Gardens of our northern palace, in Moroschwegen. It is quartered, with one quarter displaying a range of foreign-grown roses. We would naturally respect any plant breeders' rights in such matters.

We look forward to doing business with you, and also to potentially establishing diplomatic relations.

Dr. Trebyry,

I understand that you are interested in funding for your medical projects. The Emperor has an offer for you, and if interested I'm sure we will mutually benefit.

First, we are offering you a research grant of 350,000 USD per quarter, a total of 1.4 million USD per year, to increase by 50% every year for ten years. No strings attached, not a loan.

Second, we have within the Empire a province that is populated primarily by healers and spiritual ministers. They are known as the White-Robed Monks, and I believe that they, along with the citizens of a country called Wiccan Shadows, can greatly add to your repository of healing knowledge. We can arrange a meeting if you desire.

In return, we ask for a portion of the island off of your west coast for a naval/air base. We will foot the bill for all construction, and we do have environmental guideline that we follow so as to leave as little a "footprint" as possible. The base will consist of one carrier battle group ( 24 ships ), and one airwing ( 96 aircraft ). In addition there will be barracks for 300 Royal Marines.

If this is amenable to you, I will forward the appropriate paperwork and get our AI engineering corps to the island ASAP.

sincerely,

Lord Jin Lixian, Surgeon-General of the Xeraphian Empire
[OOC: Take it elsewhere, guys.]

Rulers of Gruenberg,

Thank you for your offer. Your proposal is acceptable to us. What, aside from the sharing of our findings, would you ask in return?

Dr. Trebyry,

I understand that you are interested in funding for your medical projects. The Emperor has an offer for you, and if interested I'm sure we will mutually benefit.

First, we are offering you a research grant of 350,000 USD per quarter, a total of 1.4 million USD per year, to increase by 50% every year for ten years. No strings attached, not a loan.

Second, we have within the Empire a province that is populated primarily by healers and spiritual ministers. They are known as the White-Robed Monks, and I believe that they, along with the citizens of a country called Wiccan Shadows, can greatly add to your repository of healing knowledge. We can arrange a meeting if you desire.

In return, we ask for a portion of the island off of your west coast for a naval/air base. We will foot the bill for all construction, and we do have environmental guideline that we follow so as to leave as little a "footprint" as possible. The base will consist of one carrier battle group ( 24 ships ), and one airwing ( 96 aircraft ). In addition there will be barracks for 300 Royal Marines.

If this is amenable to you, I will forward the appropriate paperwork and get our AI engineering corps to the island ASAP.

sincerely,

Lord Jin Lixian, Surgeon-General of the Xeraphian Empire

Lord Lixian,

I am agreeable to your proposal. The island, Anagorr, has but one settlement on it, in the far north-eastern section. Please do not disturb it's peace.

regards,

Dr. Trebyry

[OOC: Take it elsewhere, guys.]


ooc: why? we are both allied to Gruenberg and therefore have mutual interests.

Elyria-Lorain

We are very interested by your offer. For years, agriculture has featured as the dominant source of employment, revenue and land use for Gruenberg. However, a changing economic and literal climate, coupled with social factors, has led to its taking on an increasingly diminished status, rendering us reliant on stable foreign agricultural supplies. Grain - Gruenberg still produces vast quantities of rice, but has struggled with other cereal crops - vegetables and nuts are especially required, and any promotion of trade in such crops would be most desirable to us. In return, our expanding manufacturing sectors would be most capable of providing you with more advanced machinery with which to cultivate and harvest your crops, whilst our agrochemical firms have produced a range of effective and safe fertilisers that could prove beneficial.

Additionally, we might propose your nation provide a selection of flora for exhibition in a special "Foreign Fringes" show at the Animalpark Zoo in Flurthwel. Finally, we would be interested in arranging for your rose breeders to consider replanting the famed Rose Gardens of our northern palace, in Moroschwegen. It is quartered, with one quarter displaying a range of foreign-grown roses. We would naturally respect any plant breeders' rights in such matters.

We look forward to doing business with you, and also to potentially establishing diplomatic relations.


Sir,

Thank you for your offers. As a matter of fact, our cultivation/harvesting is done by AI technology from one of our other allies. It is extremely efficient and costs virtually nothing.

I would be happy to arrange an on-going delivery of up to 10 million metric tons of a combination of vegetables, nuts, and cereal crops per month. This would be in exchange for varieties of grapes, pomegranets, olives, and mangosteen that we do not presently have.

Oh, and the idea for a Rose Garden is wonderful. I can have my Master Gardeners there whenever you wish.

regards,

Duchess d'Avignon-Elyrie

Ceorana

We find all parts of your offer acceptable. Although Gruenberg and Ceorana have differed on some aspects of foreign and domestic policy, we have passively supported your delegacy of the IDU, as a much-needed voice of moderation with some support for national sovereignty, and have welcomed your nation's efforts in the field of intellectual property rights and free trade legislation. We wish you every success with your resolution presently at vote, and have cast our vote FOR already.

Your request to establish an SDE is more than acceptable. It would be located on Aschne Lane, where the terrible fire that wrecked much of East Flurthwel seventy years ago began (don't worry; it's quite safe now.) (Well, pretty safe.) (You know, you might want to bring a spare extinguisher...just in case, mind.) We would in return send a Special Diplomatic Envoy and associated staff (subject, of course, to UN legislation on diplomatic immunity); at this point, we have selected Keffi Wilderhen (http://img278.imageshack.us/img278/3593/coulter9ih.jpg), as we believe the people of Ceorana, noted for their political liberalism and devotion to journalistic integrity, would find her integrate well into their society.

We would strongly support a free trade agreement. We feel that perhaps elements of your present free trade proposal within the UN could be incorporated into any final agreement. Briefly, we would propose agreement to reduce and abolish tariffs and other protectionist mechanisms, combat monopolies, agree on intellectual property law, and establish an abritration committee to peacably resolve trade disputes between our two nations.

As for an agreement on standardisation in signage, we thought that a common agreement on aviation and shipping signals, on hazardous chemicals and goods storage signage, and an agreement on electrical signage, would be mutually advantageous.

With regards to the distribution of the New Boston Times, this would be acceptable. An English version would in fact be preferable, and likely to draw more - or certainly no fewer - readers than would a Rukialkotta version. We further assure you editorial independence and journalistic safety, and would be subject only to the restrictions of all papers within Gruenberg (these are not excessive: bans on certain forms of nudity, discouragement of excessive profanity, no outright blasphemy against Wenaism - this would be enforced by popular support anyway, we are afraid, and the allowance for a "G Notice", whereby the Gruenberger government reserves the right to ask newspapers to not print, or delay printing, articles that might seriously compromise national security and endanger lives).


This setup looks good. Your SDE will be located at 9815 Olive Branch Avenue, at the opposite end of the road from the IDU embassy. Its fire extinguisher seems to have been stolen -- funny, since the only people allowed in have been the newly appointed Ambassador to Gruenberg and her staff.

As for your ambassador, Patricia Worligon has been appointed Ambassador to Gruenberg. Like most Ceoranans, she's camera-shy, and we don't have a photograph available now. We'll provide one if it becomes available.

As for a free trade agreement, your conditions look pretty good. Ambassador Worligon can work out the details with you.

The production manager of the New Boston Times has informed me that they will be setting up a distribution network shortly.

Theodore Locke
Secretary of State

ooc: why? we are both allied to Gruenberg and therefore have mutual interests.[OOC: Oh, I don't know. Maybe because this thread is about relations with Gruenberg, and your little sidebar has nothing to do with that?]

[OOC: Oh, I don't know. Maybe because this thread is about relations with Gruenberg, and your little sidebar has nothing to do with that?]


ooc: check TG

[ Ugh, so sorry for not replying to the embassy thing. I'll catch up and then edit the post. -_-'

EDIT: Edited. ]

http://img153.imageshack.us/img153/1977/somersbyite3pv.png
The Federation of Azraelonia
Azraelonia Shall Prevail!
----------

We congratulate you on your change of government, and wish your new administration every success. We would gladly enter into an embassy exchange with you. A spot on Hellmark Street is presently available, and we would hope this area, one of the most upmarket and sleekly-gentrified in Old Flurthwel, would prove acceptable. In return, we would intend on dispatching Ambassador Jinn Finpad, diplomat, novellist, businessman and All-Gruenberg Under-55 Amateur Origami Silver Medallist (Welterweight division).


On behalf of the Supreme Generalissimo, I thankyou for your best wishes to our administration. We would gladly accept the building in Hellmark Street, and in return offer an embassy upon Presidential Road, a government-owned, military-guarded street within the Central Sector of Somersby City set aside for foreign embassies. Our own Ambassador will be Gregory Hildegarde Phd., political writer and long-time supporter of the National Somersbyite Democratic People's Party.

On behalf of the Federation, I wish the Sultan a prosperous and fullfilling future.

Roderick Grammar
Minister for Foreign Affairs

To Gruenberg,
We here in Londim are happy that you have accepted our diplomatic relation and thank you for your support against the Communist uprising. I am sorry if this letter seems rushed but yesterday an attempt was made on my life which kind of lowers your spirits. once this war is over we will be delighted to receive your students in an exchange. May our relationship be long an prosperous.

President Aran,
The Democratic Republic of Londim

The Healers Of Gabria

In return for our investment, we would ideally ask for the following:
i. Gruenberger firms to be given preference in allotting contracts to distribute medicines developed through the lab
ii. Collaboration and sharing of research findings with Gruenberger scientists
iii. Commitment to future friendly relations

We appreciate if you feel unable to commit to all of these at this juncture, and are happy to negotiate the terms.

Elyria-Lorain

We thank you for your offer. We grow large quantities of the crops mentioned - notably grapes - and regularly have excess amounts, so setting up supply will no problem. As for the Rose Garden, we are delighted with your willingness to help. The Sultan will be celebrating several important occasions next month, and so your gardeners and experts would be welcome at the earliest opportunity.

Ceorana

We will have a draft prepared shortly, for a trade agreement incorporating free trade and standardisation of signage elements. In the meantime, we shall be glad to welcome Ambassador Worlignon and her staff to our humble nation.

Gejigrad

OOC: Fine. Saw the edit - that's agreeable to us.

Azraelonia

Many thanks for your swift response, and we look forward to healthy future relations between our two nations.

Londim

We offer our heartiest condolences for your recent disturbance - and our gladness that it was an unsuccessful attempt. We wish you every luck in your ensuing fights, and look forward to productive relations. We remain at your call, should assistance be required. Gruenberg does not forget its friends.

Sir,

I am delighted that we can be of service. If it's alright, I'll send my Senior Horticultural Team to Gruenberg within the next few days.

sincerely,

Duchess d'Avignon-Elyrie.

[ Again, sorry for the delay. D:

Anyhow. Want to move the meeting to a new thread? ]

Subject: RE: RE: RE: Diplomatic Relations
From: Matthew Thompson <mthompson@execcomp.gj>
To: Gardab Woltzten IX <[ x ]>
Date: 07.03.06 0021


Your Sultanship,

+++I believe that a tour is able to be worked in, provided that it not go beyond twenty-two hundred hours, Gejigradian time. As I write this, I am currently preparing to leave for your capital, and will arrive within a few hours. I look forward to both the tour and the signing of the agreement.

Signed,
[signature]
People's President Matthew Thompson,
People's Community of Gejigrad

Tehrani looked up from the UN documents he had been perusing as the Undersecretary of State for Regional Affairs entered his office with what appeared to be a young page in tow.

"Terry, good to see you," Tehrani said politely as he set the documents aside. "So what's up?"

"Oh, first off, I wanted to introduce our new ambassador-at-large," replied Terry. "This is Sammy Faisano."

"Good to meet you," Tehrani offered as he shook the new ambassador's hand. The boy didn't look a day over 20.

"Yeah," Terry added nervously. "I brought him here today to discuss a little ... erm ... situation we're having vis-a-vis Gruenberg."

"Situation?"

"Oh, but just a little one!" Terry said with a forced laugh. "Tiny! Insignificant! You'd barely know it was there!"

"How 'tiny'?"

"Well, the Gruenberger ambassador is here; she's waiting in the sitting room down the hall."

"What happened?"

"Oh, I'll let Sammy here tell you all about that," Terry said as he pushed the kid toward Tehrani's desk. "Brief the man, Sammy."

With that, the undersecretary backed out of the office and raced down the hall.

"Have a seat," the secretary said, designating a chair in front of his desk.

"Thank you, sir."

"So what's this 'situation'?"

"Well, Amb. Nicks (http://forums.jolt.co.uk/showpost.php?p=10000165&postcount=105) was visiting a temple in Flurthwel on some cultural field trip, and we think she swallowed part of the temple while she was there."

"How do you swallow part of a temple?"

"I mean, something inside of the temple, sir."

"What did she swallow?"

"We think it was a miniature gold statue of Wena, Mr. Secretary."

"That's not a big deal; we'll just buy them a new one. How much could it cost?"

"Except this statue dated back to the ninth century, and we're afraid it might have been priceless."

"Damn." Tehrani pondered this a moment, sighed heavily. "You know, that Fernanda's a fucking idiot!" he finally said. "'Oh, the Gruenbergers like goats! Hehehe! Let's send them Stevie Nicks!'"

"Well, what do we do, Mr. Secretary?"

"We can't let the Gruenbergers know. The last thing we need is to be embarrassed by a friend and ally demanding that we open our ambassador's stomach so they can retrieve some relic. We'll have to pull Amb. Nicks quietly; give them some bullshit excuse."

"But what about Amb. Spolly? She's still waiting down the hall."

"Damn, forgot about that," Tehrani said with dread. "Let's go see her then."

Tehrani led the ambassador down to the hall. No sooner had he opened the door to the sitting room than the Gruenberger woman shrieked: "YOU'S ALL DARKSIDED!!"

Instantly, Tehrani pulled the door shut again. "Er, I'll let you handle this," he informed Sammy before bolting down the hallway, presumably to wherever it was the undersecretary was headed.

Department of State
The Federal Republic of OmigodtheykilledkennyAttn: His Holiness, Sultan Gardab Woltzten IX, and the Grand Vizier

Be on notice that we have recalled Amb. Stevie Nicks for medical reasons. Ambassador-at-Large Sammy Faisano will serve as envoy until such time that we can designate a permanent replacement. Also, if some priceless Wenaist artifact turns up missing later on, we had nothing to do with it.

The Destructor from Del Fuego, Mexico sends his kindest ... I already told you; we don't know anything about any missing artifact! What's the matter? Don't you trust us? We are allies after all.Sincerely,
Alex Tehrani
Secretary of State

The Holy Emperor of Patriacha would like to formaly recognize Gruenberg sovrenty and request the right to establish embasy in Gruenberg.

Prefect Julionus Ginsburg
Member of the Holy Senate of Patriacha
Prefect of Forgien Relations

Attest: Frigand Empast
Clerk of the Holy Senate
This 3rd of July in the 22nd year of Our Holy Emperor Christoph I

[taggity-zing!]

Er, yeah, if you don't like tags, just assume a really long and involved IC post goes here. <.< >.>

Gejigrad

We look forward to receiving you.

OOC: TG to sort out the arrangements.

Patriacha

We would be delighted to receive a nation from your fine nation. Your embassy, should it be acceptable, would be located on Marchmon Avenue, in the east of Flurthwel. Upmarket, it is a tree-lined boulevard near to the bridge crossing the main river of Gruenberg, the Aszumba. In return, we would anticipate sending Ambassador Kern Quattan (http://img317.imageshack.us/img317/4180/martinbell140x1400ah.jpg), an experienced military officer, foreign policy advisor and diplomat, and an associated staff.

Czardas

OOC: Ok, but I assume you'll put something IC in at some stage? I know embassy-exchange threads are a drag, and I hardly "roleplay" in mine, so just changing names or whatever is fine.

Omigodtheykilledkenny

FAO: President Fernanda, Secretary Tehrani, and that fit bird off the telly
Subject: Embassy relations

We are sad to hear about Ambassador Nicks's condition, and we wish them a speedy recovery. As chance would have it, we were considering a change in our embassy in Paradise City, and will contact your State Department in the appropriate fashion concerning such arrangements.

We welcome Ambassador Faisano, about whom we would be eager to learn more, and look forward to continuing the close relations between our two nations.

"Where the fuck is it?"

"Garzad, I am shocked! To swear, in the High Temple."

"We've lost one of the idols."

"...where the fuck is it?"

"I don't fucking know!"

"What the fuck!"

"Fuck you!"

"Fuck off."

They ssshed themselves into submission.

"The Sultan will be taking prayers tomorrow. He would notice its absence."

"We must recover it! Clearly, a cleaner must have stolen it."

"No, they're given cavity searches when they leave."

"Why?"

The priest shrugged. "They seem to enjoy it."

"Well...another priest?"

"Why? We're all so fantastically corrupt, the energy we'd expend in heaving off a little gold trinket would be a net loss. No, this was an outside job..."

"We don't have time to play that. Come on, we need to find out."

"And if we don't find it...?"

The next morning, the Sultan left the temple to cheers from the thronged crowd. As he waved to them, he leaned over to the Grand Vizier.

"Mikko...the image of Wena The Healer. Has it always been made out of...silly putty?"

OOC: Ok, but I assume you'll put something IC in at some stage? I know embassy-exchange threads are a drag, and I hardly "roleplay" in mine, so just changing names or whatever is fine.[/size]
Yeah, I intend to have an IC post up tonight when I come back.

I just am putting a placeholder here as I go out and eat lunch.

Patriacha

We would be delighted to receive a nation from your fine nation. Your embassy, should it be acceptable, would be located on Marchmon Avenue, in the east of Flurthwel. Upmarket, it is a tree-lined boulevard near to the bridge crossing the main river of Gruenberg, the Aszumba. In return, we would anticipate sending Ambassador Kern Quattan (http://img317.imageshack.us/img317/4180/martinbell140x1400ah.jpg), an experienced military officer, foreign policy advisor and diplomat, and an associated staff.


That would be acceptable however since an incident last year were a miltia officer from an overseas colonie (excuse spelling) was able to commandere(again excuse spelling) a wing of the Holy Senate Building with 150 "Associates" he brought with him to help in negotions the Holy Emperor has set a limit of 5 body guards and 10 associates in addition to the amdassoder be let out of the embassy compound at a time. I will serve as Ambasador Genrel for the first Year (NS) then subject to the Holy Emperor's aprovel Donald Frazic a member of the Holy Senate and an expert diplomat will become the permanent ambasador.

Prefect Julionus Ginsburg
Member of the Holy Senate of Patriacha
Prefect of Forgien Relations

Attest: Frigand Empast
Clerk of the Holy Senate
This 3rd of July in the 22nd year of Our Holy Emperor Christoph I

Those terms would wholly acceptable to us.

Very well by the power invested in me by the Most Holy Emperor of Patriacha I declare diplomatic ties with Gruenberg open and do establish embassy and dispatch our amdasador and his team (myself presently) you may expect our arrival in 1 NS month you may dispatch your team to Patriacha as you please you will be recived by the Holy Senate then you will be led to two sites were your embassy may be located (one a blank lot another already built)

Prefect Julionus Ginsburg
Member of the Holy Senate of Patriacha
Prefect of Forgien Relations

Attest: Frigand Empast
Clerk of the Holy Senate
This 3rd of July in the 22nd year of Our Holy Emperor Christoph I

We welcome Ambassador Faisano, about whom we would be eager to learn more, ...A week later, Sammy arrived at the sultan's palace to present his credentials, and also a copy of his resume for some reason:

Samuel Faisano
http://i10.photobucket.com/albums/a118/teddygrahams113/clip_image002-1.jpg

DOB: 4-19-82
Height: 5'10''
Marital Status: Single
Profession: Diplomat

Career: Ambassador-at-Large, Federal Republic State Department, May 2006-present
2LT, 51st Airborne Division, Federal Republic Army (helicoptor pilot for Exotic Special Operations Forces Nude Paratrooper unit), Feb. 2005-present
MTV VJ, Jan.-May 2006
"Deputy Ambassador to Tiki Taki" (Antigone Morgan's lotion boy), Nov. 2005-Jan. 2006
Antigone Morgan's poolboy, Aug.-Nov. 2005
Personal assistant to President John Thorne, Aug. 2004-May 2005
Pizza Hut delivery boy, Feb.-Aug 2004Education: B.A., International Relations, Summit City Liberal College, June 2005
Currently pursuing M.A. in international relations at Paradise City UniversityOther Info: President, Cigarette Smokers' Rights University Youth Union (SCRU-YU)
Linkin Park groupie
Drummer for Gwen's Boy Toys (No Doubt tribute band)Sammy introduced himself at the court with a simple bow, daring not kiss the sultan's ring or anything fruity like that. It is a long-practiced Kennyite custome not to genuflect before royalty.

"The president wanted me to give you this, Your Holiness," he said, holding out a small package. "A sign of his personal affection."

The sultan seized it, peeled back a single layer of wrapping paper and produced a priceless miniature gold likeness of Wena the Healer from the ninth century. He seemed to give the diplomat a puzzled look.

Sammy smiled and shrugged. "He said he saw it at an antique store, and immediately thought of you."

His tale omitted any explanation as to why a guy like Fernanda would be caught dead antiquing.

"It was either that, or a figurine of an oozing purple penguin with a battle pod."

bump

Department of State
The Federal Republic of OmigodtheykilledkennyAttn: His High Holiness the Sultan of Gruenberg, and His [however you're supposed to address a vizier], Mr. Weltin:

Be on notice that our return to the United Nations has necessitated a realignment of our diplomatic resources, and as such, Acting Amb. Sammy Faisano is to be reassigned. We are pleased, however, to announce the designation of a permanent envoy to the Holy Wenaist Sultanate: one Angela Heimann-Weisenstrauss, Ph.D., a former State Department analyst on lunatic theocracies, and an accomplished feminazi scholar in Wenaist teachings. In spite of her decidedly "womynist" intellectual leanings, however, Dr. Heimann-Weisenstrauss adopts a rather pragmiatic view of Wenaism, and is not convinced that Wenaists are all the insane misogynist fascists that many feminist scholars regard them. As Heimann-Wesienstrauss explains in her most recent book, Wenaists Are All Insane Misogynist Fascists, there are "a few" good Wenaists, "though most of them are regarded as heretics, and they are all probably being executed for treason as you read this. Also, Lori Jiffjeff is Queen Bitch." Dr. Heimann-Wesienstrauss has indicated to the State Department that even though she has quite a full plate, between teaching classes at Paradise City University, abusing her male and conservative students, badmouthing her ex-husbands in her scholarly writings, and suing Forgottenlands for plagiarism, she will nonetheless be able to represent OMGTKK in Flurthwel. We hope that the friendly relations between the Federal Republic and the Holy Wenaist Sultanate will continue with this choice.

http://i10.photobucket.com/albums/a118/teddygrahams113/clip_image005-1.jpg
Dr. Heimann-WeisenstraussSincerely,
Alex Tehrani
Secretary of State

[OOC: I know the sunset background is distracting, but I'm too lazy to go back into the Web site and make a whole new picture. Also, I really hope this new pick doesn't annoy you. I can create another character later on if you don't like her.]