Xantini
31-05-2006, 02:03
The large green insect at the news desk shuffles its papers and focuses on the screen.
"Greetings fleshbags and thank you for watching the Xantini News Network, now completly free of subliminal messaging!"
"In our first story today, foolish humans on Xantini continue to resist the unstopable might of the Tandu armies. These humans clearly do not recognize their inferiority, but obviously cannot comprehend the true depths of their foolishness! For laughing!
Now Tandu warriors are clearing them from our planet and they should be gone soon, no more humans messing up our yards!"
"Our second story comes from Helatrobus where the fleshbag Emperor seeks to marry his hideous monkey-person daughter who is a follower of the silly and false 'religion' of Christianity. There have been many equally disgusting suitors for her. Later on in the day there was some kind of war over petty fleshbag issues."
"The final story comes from Deserted Territories, where silly oily humans have began an honour-hunt to track down the fleshbag 'Sarah Vanderbelt', who is no doubt even more damaged by the fabled Ugly Tree than the Healtrobusian princess. The state is presently in a reign of chaos as they beg for help from outsiders, as they are no doubt too weak to destroy this female and consume her relatives!"
"This is XNN news, repeating every hour on the hour for your listening convinience!"
(OOC:
If you would be so kind, dont fill this thread with threats against me for running stories about eating people. Kthnxbai :P)
"Greetings fleshbags and thank you for watching the Xantini News Network, now completly free of subliminal messaging!"
"In our first story today, foolish humans on Xantini continue to resist the unstopable might of the Tandu armies. These humans clearly do not recognize their inferiority, but obviously cannot comprehend the true depths of their foolishness! For laughing!
Now Tandu warriors are clearing them from our planet and they should be gone soon, no more humans messing up our yards!"
"Our second story comes from Helatrobus where the fleshbag Emperor seeks to marry his hideous monkey-person daughter who is a follower of the silly and false 'religion' of Christianity. There have been many equally disgusting suitors for her. Later on in the day there was some kind of war over petty fleshbag issues."
"The final story comes from Deserted Territories, where silly oily humans have began an honour-hunt to track down the fleshbag 'Sarah Vanderbelt', who is no doubt even more damaged by the fabled Ugly Tree than the Healtrobusian princess. The state is presently in a reign of chaos as they beg for help from outsiders, as they are no doubt too weak to destroy this female and consume her relatives!"
"This is XNN news, repeating every hour on the hour for your listening convinience!"
(OOC:
If you would be so kind, dont fill this thread with threats against me for running stories about eating people. Kthnxbai :P)