The Phalange
08-05-2006, 23:34
"After careful consideration, we have decided to abandon our original policy of isolation from the global community, and are herby implementing a new embassy exchange program, so we may interact more closely with our fellow nations, and hopefully establish mutually beneficial relationships. Please bear in mind, however, we do not allow just anyone to have an embassy in our country. All countries that are considered left-of-center, from social democrats to full-fleged Marxist-Leninists, are explicitly forbidden from establishing embassies in our country. Commercial relations with such countries are also forbidden, and any citizens from such countries caught on our soil will be immediately deported. These terms also apply to National Socialist and other racialist countries. Countries that have a reputation of intervening in domestic issues of other countries or otherwise infringing upon their sovereignty, are also not welcome. If none of these apply to you, then you will most certainly be welcome to establish ties with our young nation.
The first step your prospective ambassador must take is to complete the following form, and to answer each and every question truthfully. Failure to do so will result in his being declared persona non grata."
Prospective Ambassador Application Form
Nation of origin:
Full Name:
Age:
Gender:
Sexual Orientation:
Religion:
Education level:
Economic views:
Social views:
Current occupation:
Previous occupations:
Criminal record:
Do you agree to submit to screening for sexually transmitted infections? (Underline one) Yes No
Do you agree to submit to screening for drugs and alcohol? (Underline one) Yes No
Do you confirm that all of these questions have been answered truthfully? (Underline one) Yes No
Please sign your name here:
Please note: You will not be accepted if one or more of the following conditions applies:
You are from a nation considered "hostile." (please see above)
You are a homosexual, bisexual, or transsexual.
You are a follower of Scientology, Satanism, Wicca, or any other pagan religion or cult.
You do not have at least a Bachelor's Degree in one field or another.
Your economic or social views are left-of-center, racialist, or extremist.
You have a criminal background.
You do not agree to submit to screening for sexually transmitted infections or drugs, or, you do agree to submit, but are found to be either infected by a sexual transmitted infection or a user of drugs or alcohol.
You do not answer all of the questions truthfully.
Once you have filled out this form, please mail it to the Foreign Ministers' Office, and we will send a reply notifying you as to whether or not you are approved. You can expect to receive a reply within 4-5 business days.
"Next, your government must agree to each of the following conditions. Only then will construction of your embassy commence."
You will be permitted a maximum of twenty-five (25) guards on rotating shifts.
You will be permitted a maximum of five (5) vehicles. They must be civilian vehicles. Military vehicles are prohibited. You may, however, outfit your vehicles with armor. You may not outfit them with weapons of any kind.
No weapons of mass destruction may be on the embassy grounds. This includes nuclear, biological, and chemical weapons.
Guards' weapons are restricted to handguns, sub-machine guns and/or knives. Uniforms are restricted to standard combat ones.
The plot of land on which your embassy is built cannot exceed 250 acres.
No drugs, alcohol, pornographic material, subversive and/or outlawed media or other literature, or anything else that may compromise public morality or national security, are allowed in your embassy.
All employees of the embassy are subject to our nation's laws and will be held fully accountable for any violation of them.
Criminals, saboteurs, subversives, or members of illegal political parties may not be sheltered in the embassy grounds.
"If your prospective ambassador is approved, and you agree to comply with all our conditions for having an embassy, then we will begin building your embassy, and diplomatic relations will commence as soon as construction of the embassy is complete.
We thank you for your interest, and hope to hear from you soon!"
The first step your prospective ambassador must take is to complete the following form, and to answer each and every question truthfully. Failure to do so will result in his being declared persona non grata."
Prospective Ambassador Application Form
Nation of origin:
Full Name:
Age:
Gender:
Sexual Orientation:
Religion:
Education level:
Economic views:
Social views:
Current occupation:
Previous occupations:
Criminal record:
Do you agree to submit to screening for sexually transmitted infections? (Underline one) Yes No
Do you agree to submit to screening for drugs and alcohol? (Underline one) Yes No
Do you confirm that all of these questions have been answered truthfully? (Underline one) Yes No
Please sign your name here:
Please note: You will not be accepted if one or more of the following conditions applies:
You are from a nation considered "hostile." (please see above)
You are a homosexual, bisexual, or transsexual.
You are a follower of Scientology, Satanism, Wicca, or any other pagan religion or cult.
You do not have at least a Bachelor's Degree in one field or another.
Your economic or social views are left-of-center, racialist, or extremist.
You have a criminal background.
You do not agree to submit to screening for sexually transmitted infections or drugs, or, you do agree to submit, but are found to be either infected by a sexual transmitted infection or a user of drugs or alcohol.
You do not answer all of the questions truthfully.
Once you have filled out this form, please mail it to the Foreign Ministers' Office, and we will send a reply notifying you as to whether or not you are approved. You can expect to receive a reply within 4-5 business days.
"Next, your government must agree to each of the following conditions. Only then will construction of your embassy commence."
You will be permitted a maximum of twenty-five (25) guards on rotating shifts.
You will be permitted a maximum of five (5) vehicles. They must be civilian vehicles. Military vehicles are prohibited. You may, however, outfit your vehicles with armor. You may not outfit them with weapons of any kind.
No weapons of mass destruction may be on the embassy grounds. This includes nuclear, biological, and chemical weapons.
Guards' weapons are restricted to handguns, sub-machine guns and/or knives. Uniforms are restricted to standard combat ones.
The plot of land on which your embassy is built cannot exceed 250 acres.
No drugs, alcohol, pornographic material, subversive and/or outlawed media or other literature, or anything else that may compromise public morality or national security, are allowed in your embassy.
All employees of the embassy are subject to our nation's laws and will be held fully accountable for any violation of them.
Criminals, saboteurs, subversives, or members of illegal political parties may not be sheltered in the embassy grounds.
"If your prospective ambassador is approved, and you agree to comply with all our conditions for having an embassy, then we will begin building your embassy, and diplomatic relations will commence as soon as construction of the embassy is complete.
We thank you for your interest, and hope to hear from you soon!"