NationStates Jolt Archive

*Just outside the five mile water mark of C&T lays a island. If you were to fly over it would look like a post-apoclyptic shanty town. From it comes a radio signal....This is to all low income nations or those that need quick cheap transportation. We have everything under the sun. They may look abused but they are guarnteed to run just right.*

Crazy Bob's

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v396/wardoggames/village.jpg

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v396/wardoggames/crazybobs.jpg

*a short pugy man walks around infront of a floting camera.*"Hello Crazy Bob here todays special is this interesting contraption we er liberated from an old Fort. We will let you have the whole thing for just the low low price of 34,986.78. We only have four in stock. The bomb is a low leval war head. The drivers will be ok as long as they drive out of the area with in two hours."

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v396/wardoggames/nukeapc.jpg

"Right over here we have captured riggers who can fix and run anything you buy from us. Eache rigger comes as a set one male and one female. They cost 12,000."

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v396/wardoggames/Riggers.jpg

OOC: To make it easier for people to buy and read, I suggest you order them into one post, or provide links to each item for sale in the first post like many storefronts do. Just a suggestion.

Do you sell any actual weapons? Instead of just pieces of junk?

Sir I resent that. All of my merchandise is in working condition. I can erm aquire other things through my contacts on the main land.

"Right over here we have captured riggers who can fix and run anything you buy from us. Eache rigger comes as a set one male and one female. They cost 12,000."

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v396/wardoggames/Riggers.jpg

The Holy Empire of the Aeson must condemn this slave trade, and urges Crazy Bob to cease peacefully.

SIC:

To the government of Colorado and Texas. I have recently became aware that there is a slave trader operating a short distance outside your waters. I request permission to commence millitary action there.

OOC: I know it's not technically in your territory, but better safe than at war, no?

..From the goverment of COlorado and Texas....
We are awear that he is selling live forms. We will not allow in massive military build ups. We will allow small units.

Sir I resent that. All of my merchandise is in working condition. I can erm aquire other things through my contacts on the main land.

I mean no disrespect, but the title is very miselading to make me think that I was able to find like used Abrams tanks and stuff.

*back at Bob's* "here is a small list of what we offer. We will be offering more. THe prices for the most part are what ever I deem is fair at the time.

four boarrowed steam mechs. http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v396/wardoggames/6d438991.jpg

We have seven C&T security bots http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v396/wardoggames/pfc.jpg
ooc:pluse nine more for security

ic: We have hundreds of old style battle armor http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v396/wardoggames/battle-armor-full.jpg

We have crates and crates of fire arms. Ranging from shot guns to assult rifles.

We fo have a few old style tanks. http://i6.photobucket.com/albums/y234/ragnardevill/FWWleichter.jpg
We are working on getting many newer ones.

SIC to government of Colorado and Texas---

Perfectly understandable. To make sure there is no misunderstanding, we plan to land one hundred paratroopers, and, if it becomes necessary, thirty Abrams Tanks.

From The Goverment of Colorado and Texas. Do what you must but remmber we will stop in if we have to.

Crazy Bob, you have one last chance to end your trade in human flesh before you call down the wrath of the Aesonic millitary upon you.

Sirs the Riggers are not humen. They are gen-tech. The only thing they know is repairing things.

OOC: Well you could have said so...

IC: A carrier bearing fighters and paratrooper planes approached the island. It was flanked by several landing boats.

*one of Bob's security officers comes running*"Sir there is a fleet of the coast what shall we do?
"Activate the mines get the defensive teams ready along with anti-air guns"

"Sir, do we attack?"

"Not yet. I want to avoid armed conflict if possible."

To Crazy Bob
If you wish to avoid armed conflict, send us the information on these riggers, so that we may determine whether or not this should be considered slave trade.

*a small spped boat heads out towards the fleet. On it is a man holding a briefcase. He starts to hail the fleet*

A rope ladder is thrown over the side so that the man can board. Ten armed marines await him, along with the captain.

*the man sticks out his hand after he climbs up8"howdy yall I am Bily welcome to Bob's, now I hear yall have some questions"

"We've been informed that you are trafficking in human flesh. Your employer denies this claim. You were supposed to be sent with proof that these Riggers cannot be considered human.

*he stops smiling his eyes going blank for a second, then in a mechanical voice he says."I have the data you need here in the briefcase*

*he stops smiling his eyes going blank for a second, then in a mechanical voice he says."I have the data you need here in the briefcase*

One of the marines steps forward to take the briefcase.

*the man blinks his eyes going back*"sorry yall i stay with that there case"

The captain blinks. "Well, will you at least show us what's in it?"

*he says I do not know. I just go with it. When you have a question push this here button.

OOC: Is the button on the suitcase?

ooc: my bad we will say it is.

The marine shrugged and pressed the button, and then waited to see what would happen.

*the mans eyes go blank as his face peels away showing a view screen. The case opens it secret panal showing a sample of fleash and read outs. On the view screen Bob apears.*"took yall long enough"

*the mans eyes go blank as his face peels away showing a view screen. The case opens it secret panal showing a sample of fleash and read outs. On the view screen Bob apears.*"took yall long enough"

"Yes, yes," said the captain impatientally. "Is the necessary information here?"

*Bob nods*"Ok yall if you look at those read outs and the sample you will see that everything is man made. Done in a lab in Colorado and Texas. We just aquired the tech."

OOC: Is this actually true, or is Crazy Bob pulling my leg?

ooc: if i told you i would have to kill you lets just say the samples showen will pass any test. You will see where this is going soon.

A short time later...

"The sample passed the test. I apologize for the misunderstanding." The Aesonic forces withdrew.

*the man thing turns and heads off the ship, once he gets down he explodes eradicating all proof he was there*

Pythogria literally laughs at the merchandise sold here.

We would go after you for selling WMDs, but... this is too funny to watch! IMAGINE how easy this stuff is to destroy!

Pythogria literally laughs at the merchandise sold here.

We would go after you for selling WMDs, but... this is too funny to watch! IMAGINE how easy this stuff is to destroy!

One mans junk is another mans treasure. We suggest you think of it that way.

He is after all called crazy bob. What you expect a crazy person to sell?

One mans junk is another mans treasure. We suggest you think of it that way.

He is after all called crazy bob. What you expect a crazy person to sell?

True, true, but still... for any proffesional army, this is just not good enough.

About the crazy point: Yep.

ooc: hey the things may look bad but they run like new. Pluse who will attack a APC holding a nuke?