NationStates Jolt Archive

Surrounded by the towering skyscrapers of Providence, a man stood on the crest of an arched bridge preaching messages of Heaven and Hell, of salvation and redemption. This was a common sight in Chitzeland now, as it was ten years ago. The difference between these two times is that then, crazy men preaching in public would be ignored and, in some cases, taunted and have trash thrown at them. These days, crowds gathered around these holy men with interest and awe.

Chitzeland was going through a spiritual awakening. Five years ago, less than one half of one percent of Chitzis considered themselves Christians, and now nearly 9% of the population follows the religion. This has been brought on by evangelist movements in all forms of media, but the most prominent of these was television. Every day, ministers and preachers appeared on shows and captivated the people with their stories from the Bible. What intrigued the people most was the concept of salvation and eternal life in heaven. They took to these beliefs like a bee to nectar.

Chitzis used to reject foreign religions because they were considered tools of the oppressive colonial regimes. It seemed that now they had forgotten this piece of history, and that 9% of the population was growing exponentially. President Copeland and his cabinet got wind of this, and took a timid approach on how to confront this issue at their latest meeting.

“I say that our churches should separate from the Church of Rome and form the new Church of Chitzeland, with me crowned as the Pope,” exclaimed President Copeland.

“Do you know anything about the structure of the church?” said Antoine Ignatius.

“Well, no, I don’t, but how hard can it be?”

“You becoming Pope would be rather over the top, if you ask me,” said Mr. Welson.

“Yes, I suppose it would be,” agreed Copeland. “But I think we can all agree on the larger matter of separating from Rome. Think of how powerful a tool a national Church would be in our fight against Islamic terrorism. Let us face it: everyone in Chitzeland hates our Muslim neighbors, but few want to fight them. We would be able to raise conscription levels to an all time high if we were to say that it was God’s divine will to smite the towelheads.”

“We will have to work with the current church organization in Chitzeland. I am afraid we can not exert outright control over it just yet.”

And so their plot was put into action. Copeland and his cabinet made their intentions stated in that meeting known to no one else.

Tapping the much used well of Chitzeland nationalism, Copeland arranged meetings with several church leaders of the nation. He told them of the horrible foreign influences and disastrous effects that connection with Rome would have. Less than a month after the original meeting, the Church of Chitzeland was established. Then, with Copeland and his cabinet as its modern apostles and the government controlled media as its missionaries, the new branch had soon swallowed up the remaining outposts loyal to Rome. “Revolt against the foreign terrorist Pope” they would say.

The Bishop of Providence, who some would say would become the Pope of this new sect, was selected by the church to make the formal announcement of the church's separation. On the steps of St. Peter’s Cathedral in downtown Providence, Bishop Rolland addressed not only the Christian inhabitants of Chitzeland, but those of the rest of the world as well.

“My fellow brothers in Christ, it is with sadness that, as some of you already know, we must separate from the Bishop of Rome and his organization. We now know that they have not been looking out for us in the way that the governing body of a church should. They have shown support of global Islamic terrorist networks that constantly work to plan the downfall of our great nation. They distort and pervert the teachings of Christ to achieve their own ends. Our attempts to reconcile have been futile. This is why we must declare our separation and found our own Church of Chitzeland. Under this new name, we will work to become closer to God, not closer to the greedy, murderous fiends that have had a history of violent and corrupt rule. I urge all of you to support our new organization. Through our brotherhood, we will together rise up and achieve the Kingdom of Christ on Earth.

“I must also urge those in other lands who may be observing our historic act. Release yourself from the corrupt control of the terrorist supporting Pope and join us in the Church of Chitzeland. Only in purity and dedication can we achieve God’s will.”

This new church needed a leader, and one was found in the Bishop of Providence. “We must continue tradition,” he said. “We have separated from the Roman Catholic Church, not from our beliefs.”

A movement by the Church of Chitzeland leadership to crown a pope finally came to fruition today. A crowd of over a hundred thousand gathered outside St. Peter’s Cathedral, which was the site of the coronation of the Bishop of Providence as Pope Rolland.

The new pope came out in front of the cathedral dressed in papal garments, and gave blessings to the crowd. He accepted his new position with humility. Rolland gave a speech detailing that all of Chitzeland’s Christians needed to unify, preached a sermon, and finally ended the ceremony in prayer.

This incident left a sour taste in President Copeland’s mouth. Setting up this new church system was a move that he somehow felt he would regret. For the first time, President Copeland watched his people following a leader as a third party. He was not the follower, as he was in the days of his father’s administration, nor the leader himself. Would allegiance to this new figure diminish his own influence? Only time would tell.

Copeland ratified the plans for construction of a Papal District in Providence.

Protesters rallied in front of St. Peter’s Cathedral on a bright Sunday morning, crying out against the break from Rome and the new pope. Their obstruction was an annoyance to those that were attempting to attend Mass. The protest was the first organized gathering of its kind and was widely covered by the media.

Pope Rolland commented that afternoon that “those who oppose our decision should be tolerated. It is with great regret that we split from our brothers in Rome, but they must realize that we did so with a righteous reason.” There was also much confusion about the terminology, as the citizens of Chitzeland thought that the antipope that the protesters were claiming Rolland to be was the papal equivalent of the Antichrist.